Metro Moron

Page 1


This photo essay is my first recent attempt at something

It’s a hundred miles from balanced reportage, but to

more photojournalistic than my normal stuff, which is

be honest, right here, right now these buses get the

becoming increasingly abstract and often devoid of

urban transport job done, and I can’t deny that. The

people. It’s not art, for sure.

negative aspects of their service are manifold, including traffic congestion, risks to public safety and air pollution.

Since some of the best subjects are right under our

As a long-term guest in this beautiful nation, it’s not

noses (or in this case, up our noses?), I decided to

polite for me to criticise too much. Sebastiao Salgado

conquer my healthy distrust of public transport to

would surely have taken a braver approach. I’m just

explore one of Jakarta’s more notorious bus operators.

happy to have survived the experience.

Rather than writing a lengthy piece to accompany the

I hope you enjoy this essay and that it gives those

photos, which are self-explanatory really, I wrote a

unfamiliar with Jakarta an insight into one aspect of

somewhat satirical rhyme to accompany the reader

everyday life for the teeming millions who call it home.

through the pages; plus a few captions. Anyone who has visited Jakarta or who is lucky enough to reside here will know exactly what I am writing about.

Steve



Corporate graphic standards don’t really exist beyond the orange, white and blue livery. The logotype appears in a myriad of forms, from stenciled to hand painted versions.



A typical example of the breed. Coachbuilt in filler over rusty sheet steel. No signal lamps of course, and a bumper that bears the scars of countless collisions with motorists.



We’re not talking visibility here. The name of the game is ‘cover as much of the windscreen as possible in gaudy adhesive vinyl.’ It’s not like you need to see where you’re going anyway.



Though bus owners are generally considered a rather macho bunch, they’re obviously not afraid to express their softer, feminine side once in a while and pretty things up.



Though drivers of smaller vehicles may feel the need to keep both hands on the wheel, a bus can easily be steered with one hand at all times, leaving the other hand free to hold your smoke.









Just so you’re all aware that we really do care about the environment, we’ll whack a big flower graphic on the filthy window. There...that should make everything better now.





Rumor has it that these buses had doors once, but little evidence remains of that today. Besides they’d just get in the way of passengers. And rain and stuff.



Buses jostle for pole position at the traffic lights as they depart the hectic Blok M bus terminal in Jakarta. It appears that their impressive ‘traffic control tower’ is unmanned 24/7.


Note the red turn light the buses leaving this terminal routinely ignore, and of course the plume of noxious diesel fumes that most Metro Minis contribute to Jakarta’s air quality.


Says it all really, doesn’t it? That’s if macho means being ancient, falling apart, filthy, smelly, hazardous, noisy and extremely ugly.







You’d think we could use all those big shiny mirrors to drive more safely. Yeah, right. We just like to get a nice clear view of all the people we’re pissing off behind us.



Bus passengers are a captive audience for all kinds of street vendors and buskers, which is just fine if you happen to fancy some live music onboard or you forgot to bring your toothbrush.






Well you can’t say I didn’t warn you, can you? After all, I have the company reputation to uphold, haven’t I? The 69 is just my route of course.





Metro Moron is my third contribution to the

You can also view my previous SoFoBoMo efforts

annual Solo Photo Book Month, or SoFoBoMo.

and other personal publications online at:

It’s a web-based group event started in 2008

http://issuu.com/stevedodds

by Paul Butzi. dubbed ‘The worst photo

Issuu is a fantastic way to self-publish and share

competition in the world’ because there are no

online, as well as discover and connect globally

prizes and no glory for participants beyond

with the work of others who share your interests.

personal satisfaction. Solo photographers around

I thoroughly recommend exploring issuu.com.

the world create and upload photo books in PDF form, within one ‘fuzzy’ calendar month, start to finish. Find out more at: www.sofobomo.org

Terima kasih! (Indonesian for ‘thank you’)



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