DEFINITION Bullying is the deliberate, unprovoked and unjustifiable use of force, either physical or mental, by an individual or group. It causes physical, psychological or emotional harm to the person being bullied. It robs a person of their rights, their peace of mind and their self-esteem. It can happen not just once but time after time. ASPECTS OF BULLYING Bullying can be: • Persistent • Intimidating, fearsome, stressful • Pre-meditated • Intentional • Demoralising • Physical • Psychological • Humiliating, demeaning, threatening • The use of superior position of strength to intimidate • A process designed to lower self-esteem • Carried out by individuals or groups It includes: • Name calling/mocking • Physical violence • Demands for money or possessions • Hiding someone’s possessions • Being pressured to do something you do not want to do • Threatening behaviour • Deliberately leaving people out or not talking to them • Teasing and tormenting a person about their social background, race, gender, personal appearance, school performance, possessions, disabilities, sexual orientation • Being sent unpleasant notes, e mails, internet messages, texts or made the subject of graffiti • Being touched against you will • Sexual harassment
WHAT TO DO If you are being bullied or you know someone who is being bullied tell someone. Don’t blame yourself for what has happened. —
• Tell your parents and in school tell a teacher or any adult you trust.
if you don’t tell you can’t get help. As well as telling, you can help stop bullying by: • Being friendly towards people you know are being bullied, include them in you discussions, games, break-times and lunchtimes • Not laughing when someone is being bullied this gives the bully a reward • Saying out loud that you don’t like what is going on • Not joining in • Letting an adult know if you see someone else being bullied —
WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THE BULLY In every case the incident will be taken seriously and the responses can include some or all of the following: • You will have to explain your behaviour to a member of staff • An account of what you have done will be written down • Your parents will be informed of the incident and invited into the school to discuss the matter • Your Year Head will keep a record of the incident • You will have to apologise to your victim • You will have to replace or repair any possessions you damaged Depending on the seriousness of the bullying incident one or a combination of the following will be applied: • Placed on detention after school or at lunchtime • Placed on Report • Isolated from lessons for a defined period of time • Suspended from St. Paul’s • Permanently excluded from St. Paul’s
HOW THE SCHOOL WILL WORK TO PROMOTE ANTIBULLYING • All staff will praise and promote co-operative and caring behaviour • We will promote positive relationships by showing through our
own behaviour that it is better for everyone to respect and care for each other • We provide an environment where children feel accepted and valued • We will promote anti-bullying strategies through our academic and pastoral curriculum • Staff will treat all allegations of bullying seriously and will investigate each incident • Every effort will be made to ensure that any sanctions imposed are fair and appropriate and are applied in a non-humiliating way • Staff will watch for signs of distress in students which may suggest bullying. These might include deterioration in work, late arrival for lessons, hanging back at the end of class, regular “illnesses”, isolation, wanting to be with adults rather than peers. • We will use school assemblies to promote this anti-bullying policy • Each department will, where appropriate, incorporate this antibullying message into its teaching • Children identified as being bullied will be offered counselling by our counselling staff • This policy will be issued to every pupil’s home
FOR PARENTS Things to look out for in victims of bullying: • Regularly feeling unwell in the mornings • Reluctance to make the journey to and from school • Money or possessions going missing • Clothes torn or school bag damaged • Wanting extra money for no particular reason • Unexplained cuts or bruises • Taking different routes to school • Unexplained behaviour changes, e.g. moody, bad tempered, tearful
• Unhappiness • Nightmares • Not wanting to leave the house • Reluctance to talk openly about school Mends or play times What you should do if you think your child is being bullied: • Talk calmly with your child about his/her experience • Make a note of what your child says particularly who was said to be involved and how often the bullying has occurred, where it happened, —
and what happened • Reassure the child that he/she has done the right thing in telling you about the bullying and that he/she has done nothing wrong • Encourage your child to immediately report any bullying to a teacher • Make an appointment to see your child’s Form Teacher even if your child is reluctant that you do so The school can only help if we know there is a problem • Explain to the Form Teacher the problem your child is experiencing • Do not encourage your child to hit back. It will only make matters worse and such behaviour may be contrary to your child’s nature. More positively, encourage your child to recruit Mends. An isolated child is more likely to be bullied.
What to do if your child is the bully Many children may be involved in bullying at some time or other. Some parents may not be aware or find it difficult to accept that their son or daughter could be involved in bullying. • Talk to your child and explain that such behaviour is unacceptable and is making other children miserable • Make an appointment to see your child’s Form Teacher. Discuss with the Form Teacher how you and the school can work together to stop the bullying behaviour • Just as the victim will be offered counselling, so the perpetrator will be offered similar assistance • Check regularly how things are going • Praise your child as the situation improves