Special Pull Out Bridal Guide Love Blooms
April 2011 Priceless www.sasee.com
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you. – A. A. Milne
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featured articles
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April 2011 Volume 10, Issue 4
who’s who
You Want Me To Wear That? by Alice Muschany
Front Yard Wedding by Marsha Tennant
Worse, Poorer, and Sickness by Tina Callison
Lightning Strike by Susan Traugh
Thine to Inherit: Homage to the Family Recipe Box by Susan Sundwall
Southern Snaps by Leslie Moore
Real-Life Romance by Diane Stark
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Special Pull Out Bridal Guide
Love Blooms
Publisher Delores Blount Sales & Marketing Director Susan Bryant Editor Leslie Moore Account Executives Kim Griffin Amanda Kennedy-Colie Erica Schneider Celia Wester Art Director Taylor Nelson Photography Director Patrick Sullivan Graphic Artist Scott Konradt Accounting Bart Buie CPA, P.A. Administrative Assistant Barbara J. Leonard Executive Publishers Jim Creel Bill Hennecy Tom Rogers
A Greeting Card Tip for Newlyweds by Janey Womeldorf
What’s Your Secret? by Kim Seeley
A Big Fat Greek Wedding in Wilmington by Ann Ipock
PO Box 1389 Murrells Inlet, SC 29576 fax 843-626-6452 • phone 843-626-8911 www.sasee.com • info@sasee.com Sasee is published monthly and distributed free along the Grand Strand. For subscription info, visit www.sasee.com. Letters to the editor are welcome, but could be edited for length. Submissions of articles and art are welcome. Visit our website for details on submission. Sasee is a Strand Media Group, Inc. publication.
I n T h is I ssue Sasee Gets Candid . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42 Scoop on the Strand . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44
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Copyright © 2011. All rights reserved. Reproduction of any material, in part or in whole, prepared by Strand Media Group, Inc. and appearing within this publication is strictly prohibited. Title “Sasee” is registered with the U.S. Patent & Trademark Office.
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contributing writers Tina Callison is a wife, mother and freelance writer. Her current focus is on creating resources for families coping with medically complex children and child loss. Her first children’s book, But I Still Miss You, is scheduled for publication in this month.
letter from the editor Spring at the beach is a beautiful, almost magical time, and perfect for another Sasee wedding issue! I hope you’ll enjoy reading some great essays and getting valuable tips and ideas for planning that special day. I had so much fun interviewing three long-married couples for this issue’s “Southern Snaps;” all three had wonderful stories of why their marriage has stood the test of time. Whether you’re the bride, mother-of-the-bride, or just remembering the wedding of someone special, there’s something in this issue for you.
Ann Ipock is an award-winning Southern humorist and speaker who writes for the Georgetown Times, Sasee and Columbia County Magazine. Ann lives in Wilmington, N.C. with her husband, Russell. Life is Short, I Wish I Was Taller (published October, 2010) completes the Life is Short trilogy. Contact Ann through her website, www.annipock.com. Alice Muschany lives in Flint Hill, Missouri. She has been published in Cup of Comfort, Chicken Soup and Guideposts. She is also an Opinion Shaper for the Suburban Journal.
Happy Spring!
Kim Seeley lives with her husband, Wayne, in Wakefield, Virginia. She has just published her first national article in the new volume of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series entitled, What I Learned from the Dog.
cover artist
Diane Stark is a wife, a mother of five and a freelance writer. Her work has appeared in publications like Chicken Soup for the Soul: A Tribute to Moms. She loves to write about her family and her faith.
Wedding Day by Katrina Peterson Katrina Peterson is a Chicago area artist who originally hails from a small town in central Maine. She received her Bachelor of Fine Arts degree in 2004, with a focus on Studio Art, New Media and Art History. While at school, Katrina began investigating how a computer can be a valuable tool to the modern artist, and has since found her artistic voice in digital portraiture. Landscapes and cityscapes have never captivated her imagination the way people do. Katrina thinks “portraits are a fantastic way to capture the people and moments that matter most in life.” She uses the same rules of color and shape found in traditional painting, but applies them using a computer. Everything is hand drawn in a range of shapes and opacities to give each portrait its own depth and richness. For the cover painting, Katrina really wanted to capture “road ahead” for the newlywed couple, and all the excitement and tension of what their unknown path holds. To learn more visit www.katrinapeterson.com, or her etsy site, www.etsy.com/shop/katrinapeterson.
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Susan Sundwall is a freelance writer and children’s playwright. She is currently working on her second cozy mystery and hopes that her first will be published soon. Marsha Tennant is the author of the children’s book, Margaret, Pirate Queen, and lives in Calabash with hubby, Randy; dog, Callie and cat, Clara. After 40 years in education, Marsha will be retiring in June to write the second pirate book that takes place on the Outer Banks. Marsha and Randy plan to travel and sleep in until 7 am! She can be reached at marshatennant@yahoo.com. Award-winning author, Susan Traugh, lives in California with her husband and three children. Her books and essays can be found on her website www.susantraugh.com. Janey Womeldorf is a freelance writer who can lose hours in card shops. She scribbles away in Memphis, Tennessee.
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You want me
to wear That?
by Alice Muschany “It’s always the badly dressed people who are the most interesting.” – Jean Paul Gaultier –
My long-time friend, Janice, arrived at our girls’ only luncheon grinning like a Cheshire cat. She held out her hand and announced, “Look who’s engaged.” In her late fifties, Janice had been divorced for over twenty years and finally met a great man. We were all ecstatic. She deserved to be happy. Everyone congratulated Janice as they checked out her beautiful engagement ring and asked about the wedding. “What color are our dresses?” I teased. Another girlfriend chimed in, “I look good in black.” “Remember, we’re all blondes now,” one quipped. The following weekend I watched a movie about a girl who was always a bridesmaid, never a bride – to the tune of twenty-seven weddings. The gowns, ranging from hilarious to downright ugly, hung in her closet as a constant reminder. That gave me the idea of throwing Janice a shower requesting guests to wear a bridesmaid dress, style and color of their choice. Enthusiasm bubbled, but there was just one small problem. Even if we’d kept the dresses we’d worn in weddings years ago, there was only a slim chance we’d be able to wear them now, thanks to our middle age bodies. Gowns that no longer fit were pooled for a free-for-all. Everyone eyed the formals discretely, hoping they’d be able to squeeze into one. Some browsed garage sales, while others checked out resale shops. One friend found hers at Goodwill. Who needs the Academy Awards? Guests paraded in wearing long gowns and sporting beehives and bouffant hairstyles. Charm bracelets jingled from their arms. Suddenly our days as bridesmaids didn’t seem all that long ago. Conversation turned to styles we’d been asked to wear by our so-called friends. Not even a model could have pulled off some of those dresses. Guests were given the job of voting for the prettiest gown, the ugliest, the shortest and the tightest. The Southern Belle ensemble won hands down for the prettiest, even though the gown used more material than Scarlett O’Hara’s dress sewn from curtains. The girl with the ugliest formal, shoes dyed to match, wore it in a friend’s wedding and managed to forgive her. From the looks of the dress, that couldn’t have been easy. Shortest was a no brainer, but tightest a close call. After much thought, Large Marge was declared the winner. She wasn’t the only one afraid to eat a second piece of cream-cheese filled cake, iced with colorful bridesmaid dresses. Most of our vintage clothing left little wiggle room, a few held together only by safety pins. As Janice opened gifts, Sonny and Cher crooned softly in the background, “I Got You Babe.” We warned the guest of honor that each ribbon she broke would represent how many prescriptions the newlyweds would need instead of the number of children they’d have. She unwrapped each present slowly. We’d participated in traditional shower games too many times. Instead, we played games geared toward our era. In the unscramble-the-words game, Menopause, Viagra and Depends replaced bride, groom and wedding cake. Next, guests triumphed when it came to recognizing theme songs from popular 50s & 60s TV shows. Like Mary Tyler Moore, we knew we were going to make it after all. And didn’t we all enjoy those Happy Days? Of course, everyone laughed at the mention of Lucy. And like Laverne and Shirley, we’d been busy making our dreams come true. Commercial jingles kept us on our toes. How many times did we wonder, does she or doesn’t she use Clairol? And who wasn’t Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs? Two days after the shower, I still had “See the USA in your Chevrolet,” stuck in my head like Bazooka bubblegum. As guests departed, everyone agreed it had been a while since they’d laughed that hard. Our shower proved that, although we might be showing our age, we were still young at heart.
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Front Yard
Prince William and Kate Middleton should have consulted the bride and groom who got married in a family front yard last spring. As I traveled the rural route that connected the two Carolinas, I had a front row seat. My invitation did not arrive in the mail, and I wasn’t one of 1,800 invited to a famous abbey. Instead by Marsha Tennant I had the honor of watching two lives blend into one. It was a neighborhood event. Each afternoon as I traveled home from work I observed the preparation that moved closer to the celebration. Early in the week a grandfather, along with a small child, breezed through the yard on a John Deere riding mower. They laughed and made circles in the grass. What fun to watch them as they gave the gift of time and love to make sure the yard was pristine for the event. Two elderly women were crouched down in the flower beds pulling weeds and freshening up heirloom plants and shrubs. Both of them had aprons tied around their waists. This chore was a brief respite from inside tasks that waited. Another afternoon as I passed by there were two teenage boys with paint brushes in their hands. They were looking warily at a line of weathered picnic tables strewn across the lawn. The tables were waiting for a fresh coat of white paint so that they would be ready for the guests that would arrive on the big day. It took several days for the job to be completed. I could only imagine the frolic and antics when adolescence is involved. One afternoon near the end of the week a big burly man had a power hose aimed at the house. He was cleaning it to make sure that it sparkled when the bride and groom stood in front of it to say their vows. I noticed another man on the porch touching up the railings with a fresh coat of paint. A small child was sweeping the steps. Each family member had a role in the big day. On Friday a huge tent was erected. By the time I arrived it was in place. Neighbors were walking from their yards into the wedding yard. Each person was carrying flowers, plastic containers or other gifts to contribute to the ceremony. There was chatter and laughter mingled with hugs and smiles. This was a blessed event. Sitting at one of the picnic tables were three generations of women. I knew who they were. What advice were the older women giving to the bride? What last minute details were being checked? I wanted to ask what was borrowed, and what was blue. I wondered if others were coming from out of town. I hoped that the newlyweds would have a honeymoon. All the questions that one asks were in my head. I knew that the wedding was taking place that late afternoon so I decided to run a few errands. I had to see the results of the week of love and hard work. Watching the family and friends prepare this incredible gift for the young couple moved my heart and renewed my faith in the simple notion of love. I knew they wouldn’t mind that I had been part of this family – even if it was only by observing as I journeyed to and from my home. Weddings occur in churches, gardens, cathedrals and front yards. And here on the coast – on the beach. The WHERE isn’t important. The vows spoken and honored are the proof in the pudding. This wedding that I watched come to fruition had the love and support of an extended family. There wasn’t a great deal of money spent but the time and sacrifice priceless examples of what a union should be. What a lucky couple. That was over a year ago. I think of them each day as I drive by. A few weeks ago as I approached the house I caught a glimpse of something blowing in the wind. It was tied to the mailbox. The pink balloons assured me all was well.
Wedding
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Worse, Poorer, and Sickness
by Tina Callison
I remember getting a case of cold feet about a month before my wedding. I was terrified, and for a time, seriously considered calling the whole thing off. Did I love him? Yes. Did he love me? Yes. Was there anything in particular about the idea of spending the rest of my life with him that I didn’t think I could handle? No. So…what was the problem? The problem was the wedding vows. We were using traditional vows – something we were in complete agreement on – and it was the vows themselves that scared me. “For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death parts us.” I had no issues with the thought of having him by my side for whatever life might throw at us; in fact, there was no one better that I could think of that I would want with me through everything. The thing that caused my complete paralyzing fear was the fact that by saying those vows, I was actively admitting that “worse, poorer and sickness” – in whatever forms they might take – were a very real possibility; that very bad things could happen. I have always had an active imagination, and the scenarios that I managed to conjure up were not things that I wanted to have to deal with, no matter who was at my side. Eventually I rationalized that marriage isn’t the cause of “worse, poorer and sickness,” but rather, these things are part of life whether people are married or not, and really, if I had to face these things, I would rather do it with him by my side than face them alone. And, with that, I did my best to put my fears aside, and the wedding went on as planned with all other issues being limited to footwear and nail polish. I spent our fifth wedding anniversary sitting on a cot in a hospital room where our nearly 19-month-old second child had spent most of her life battling a congenital heart defect labeled as Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. She was a few days away from discharge after a 98-day stay in the pediatric ICU; we were being sent home so that we could “have some time together at home as a family.” We were being sent home after heart surgeries number six and seven were unable to make any significant improvements; after heart catheterization number nine showed that there weren’t really any good options left; after being told that we should have a conversation about putting a DNR order in place. After discharge, we had exactly one month together at home as a family before taking an ambulance ride back to the hospital; a ride that I knew would be a one-way trip. Within a few hours after arriving at the hospital, she went into cardiac arrest. Two and a half weeks later, we made the decision to take her off from life support. We were each able to hold her for an hour in the rocking chair before she passed away in my arms. This was “worse, poorer and sickness.” This was what I had been so afraid of; well, no, technically this was actually worse than any of the scenarios that I had managed to conjure up – the death of a child had made my list, but not the death of a child after 20 months of hospital stays, impossible decisions, financial devastation and countless other nightmares that tested every aspect of our marriage all in one fell swoop. At one point, our daughter’s cardiologist looked at us during one of her clinic visits that again included more bad news and said, “You two look as though you’ve been beat over the head with a club. Repeatedly.” That was a pretty fair assessment of how it felt. So, my fears about those wedding vows came true in some of the most painful ways possible. And, when they did, I began to truly understand them. I understand why they are so important. I understand that a bond between two people that can withstand “worse, poorer and sickness” in whatever forms they might come is one of the most amazing bonds imaginable. I understand that I could not have made it through any of that on my own, and that being able to share it with someone is a way to survive it. To have someone to go through life’s nightmares with you, and still be around to share in the joys as well, that is something special.
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Lightning Strike by Susan Traugh
I’d already kissed a thousand frogs. But no one had turned into a prince. One by one, I’d watched my friends find love and marry. One by one they’d moved on while I stood alone and rejected. I was thirty-three; craving marriage; dreaming of happily ever after. Yet, a national woman’s magazine that year said a woman my age had a greater chance of being struck by lightning. And, then, I was. The irony was: I’d given up. I’d moved in with my brother so I wouldn’t have to be alone. My cats cuddled next to me at night so I wouldn’t notice the cold emptiness on the other side of the bed. Teaching in the inner city provided the babies I longed for and the world-saving service that made me feel needed in the world and not just that eternal fifth wheel that showed up at married friends’ dinner parties. I’d created order and service out of my loss and moved my life along in a measured, if dully predictable, step. Then Heaven interceded. I was the music expert at school. I coordinated the plays, wrote the curriculum and planned the festivals. So, when “he” was supposed to come to the school to teach the teachers a whole new music system, I was unimpressed – so unimpressed that I didn’t show up for the workshop. I’d had the flu and was just coming back to school. I needed to get back to my students and dreaded spending the day with this artist-in-residence. I already had my music program nailed and didn’t need guidance from some so-called expert. So, I stayed home another day and skipped his workshop. When I returned, “Mr. Tra-la-la” was the talk of the school. The teachers were all atwitter with the funny, clever, talented Mr. Traugh. I wanted to gag. Glad to have missed the workshop, I got back to work with my kids and forgot about the near miss. But, he returned. Every week for six weeks, he’d come back for a workshop. Every week for five weeks, I avoided seeing him. And then a fellow teacher grabbed me. “You’ve got to meet him!” Lynne cooed. “He’s so good at what he does. But, you have to see his book. It’s self-published curriculum. You could do that. Come on, I’ll introduce you.” Later, she confessed she knew it was a lure I’d lunge at, and that, really, she just thought it was a match. But, back then, I just wanted to learn how to publish the books that floated in my head. So, I followed her. He was bending over his MGB when we got to the parking lot. His black trench coat obscured his body, and his head was deep in the trunk as he arranged his books. Lynne caught his attention and asked to introduce us. Mr. Traugh straightened up and turned around. Have you ever seen those movie special effects where the boom zooms in at break-neck speed, like the eye of God coming from the universe to the center of your iris? That’s where we were as the electricity between us actually made Lynne take a step back. “Oh, there you are,” whispered the knowing voice in my head. All those silly movie clichés about rainbows and shooting stars and lightning strikes suddenly weren’t silly, suddenly weren’t cliché. Our souls instantly knew each other and, in that moment, they proposed and accepted. I shook his hand and, then and there, the deal was sealed. Our first date was the day after Valentine’s Day. Always-a-bridesmaid, I would be the Maid of Honor at my kid sister’s wedding the day before our date. I would be the bride in October. I’ve been Mrs. Traugh for twenty-three years now. We still have the china we picked out on our first date. We also have dozens of published books between us, having learned to coordinate our talents to a whole greater than the sum of its parts. And, despite dire predictions from infertility specialists, we have three of the most precious children to ever walk the planet. But, happily-ever-after doesn’t mean fade to black. Happily-ever-after is about life’s adventures. It’s about infertility and miscarriages, and tragic accidents and financial ruin. It’s about wonderful triumphs and devastating defeats. It’s about holding each other up as we tread water as fast as we can. And, it’s about knowing where the port is during life’s most tumultuous storms. Just when I thought there were no more men left for the taking, I took the best. Steven is loving, spiritual, funny, intelligent and self-deprecating. We’re that old couple on the beach, holding hands, looking more and more alike each year. He’s strong where I’m weak and weak where I’m strong. We hold each other up, kick each other’s butts, kiss each other’s wounds, stroke each other’s cheek. Now, my bed is never cold – those babies I wanted are nearly grown, but we five still cuddle and kiss and talk in that big family cocoon And, working with my husband, I have the creative, service oriented career I’d always dreamed of and the happily ever after that felt so elusive. I suppose the magazine was right. I was old. I needed to be struck by lightning. And I was. On our wedding day, I gave Steven a ring with five diamonds. Inside the ring an inscription reads: Worth waiting for. Amen.
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Thine to Inherit:
Homage to the Family Recipe Box by Susan Sundwall
Several years ago, during a coffee break discussion with one of my daughters-in-law, the subject came up of who would be leaving what to whom when family members die. Smiling, Kate suddenly blurted, “I’d like to have your recipe box.” Her request took me by surprise because if you could see my recipe box you’d wonder why on earth anyone would want it. It’s an old plastic flip top box about the size of a large shoebox. I got it when I joined a recipe club back in the late 70s, and I’ve been cramming recipes into it ever since. I know, I know, in this day and age when everyone has access to a computer there’s no excuse for me not to get that box organized. Those recipes should be copied anew into a Word document, filed alphabetically, sourced (who gave me this one anyway?) and then I should hold a ceremonial bonfire to dispatch the old ones. That would be the efficient modern way to do it. My daughter-in-law would be so proud. But, but…hang on a minute. There’s another, more sentimental, side to the story. How could I toss out the index card with my friend Carol’s recipe for granola on it? She gave it to me almost thirty years ago right after she shared a bowl of it with me in her kitchen. It’s crammed full of bran, coconut, oatmeal and nuts. It’s baked and sweet and crunchy. I was so impressed that she’d made it herself. Written out in her own handwriting, it’s impossible that I should throw that one out or several others she gave me, like her grandmother’s banana salad or her decadent chocolate sauce. The distinct squiggles and swirls that characterize her penmanship are too precious, especially now that she’s in a care facility suffering from dementia. And, what about the recipe for German Apple Cake, with cream cheese frosting, from my Mom? The first time I tasted it was the year she sent it across the country to us in a Christmas package. It was one of those holiday treats you sneak back into the fridge for right after you’d already had your “official” piece on a plate. Yeah, that good. The index card for that one is batter-splattered and smudged with cinnamon – impossible to replicate in a Word document. My recipe for hamburger soup is neatly penned and protected inside a plastic sleeve. It was given to me many years ago by one of the prettiest seventy-year-olds I ever knew. I’d teased her badly about the very idea of a hamburger soup, and then I tasted it. Oh, yum! Before moving to Alaska to live with her daughter, my lovely blue-eyed friend handed me the recipe. Hamburger soup is bubbling away on the stovetop as I write this. Smells pretty darn good, too. The recipes I’ve clipped from magazines “ain’t never gonna” come
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back. One, for a cheesy bean casserole with a biscuit top, shows a man with a humongous 1970s afro digging into the dish with a huge spoon. Where in the world would I ever find that again? Same goes for Susan’s Macaroni and Cheese, a recipe from an old Family Circle magazine, and the pecan turtle cookies I make almost every year at Christmas. There’s a whole lot of family history in that recipe box. The oldest recipe, and boy is that thing splattered, is for my Mom’s date nut bread. I’ve made that bread during the holidays every year for almost forty years. Another oldie but goodie is from my Aunt Delia for her renowned chocolate cake. It’s almost as good as the old McCall’s magazine recipe I inherited from Mom called “The Perfect Chocolate Cake.” The first time I made it I made notations on the back of the paper. “Make sure you grease and flour all pans – even non-stick.” I guess part of my cake was reluctant to leave its cozy non-stick home. I just hate digging a cake out of the pan, don’t you? I also noted that it’s necessary to sift the powdered sugar and to level the layers before baking since one layer came out lopsided that first time. I had to level it after baking. But I’m sure I made a tasty little snack of that cut off piece, probably to go with the fresh cup of coffee I always seem to want when I’m baking. Maybe my daughter-in-law knew what she was asking for or maybe not. She always raves about my cooking, but she’ll get more than recipes in that box. She’ll inherit a family gem that neither diamond nor ruby can match. I suppose if I searched the Internet long enough, I could come up with some of these recipes or something close, but what fun would that be? How could those recipes know about my Aunt Delia, and how everyone looked forward to chocolate cake day? How could they convey the simultaneous joy and sadness I feel when I look at my friend’s handwriting and wonder how she’s doing in assisted living? There are friends, Grandma, Mom, aunts, memories and a whole lot of history in that box, not just recipes. So, I’ll keep my all-jammed-up old flip top container just the way it is, because I want to leave my children something unique and precious; splatters, blurred ink, cautions, torn corners and all!
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Love
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April 2011
Bridal Guide
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FREE “Look & Feel Your Best” Seminar Thursday, May 5th at Sunrise Pancake House at 6:30pm 18 www.sasee.com
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Love Blooms Bridal Guide
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Bridal Guide
Love Blooms Art • Collectibles • Jewelry
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Bridal Guide
Love Blooms Make Wedding Bells Ring...
Passport to Wedded Bliss Contest
Enter to win a two page spread in Sasee featuring YOUR WEDDING! 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7.
Tear out this sheet and take it with you when you visit any of the advertisers in our bridal guide. Have a store employee initial in the space provided. Once you finish shopping, mail in your “passport” with the signatures. For every store you visit, you get one entry in the contest. “Passports” must be received by May 30, 2011. Winner will be announced in June, 2011. No purchase is necessary at any of the locations. Full rules and instructions on www.sasee.com or www.facebook.com/saseemag
Passport to Win Name: Phone #
Email: Date of your wedding:
Abrams Department Store
The Little White Dress
Art & Soul
The Market Common
Barbara’s Fine Gifts Burroughs & Chapin Carolina Charm Florist Christopher’s Fine Jewelry Croissants Bistro & Bakery David E. Grabeman, D.D.S., P.A. Douglas Diamond Jewelers Dr. Sattele’s Eleanor Pitts Fine Gifts & Jewelry Frugal Princess Boutique
Medieval Times Middle Child Photography Mykonos Pawleys Island Bakery Pawleys Island Swimwear Priceless Desserts Sassy Girl Sassyfras Studio 77
Grady’s Jewelers
Taylor’s Boutique
Greg Norman
Ultratan
Island Shoes
Victoria’s Ragpatch
The Kangaroo Pouch
Waynes View Photography
Mail this completed “passport” to: PO Box 1389, Murrells Inlet, SC 29576 Attn: Passport contest or drop by our offices at 3955 Hwy 17 Bypass, Murrells Inlet.
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Bridal Guide
Pawleys Island Swimwear
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Carmen Marc Valvo Tommy Bahama Coco Reef Christina Speedo
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Inlet Square Mall Hwy. 17 Bypass Murrells Inlet, SC 843-651-9372
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Southern Snaps
A Tale of Three Marriages: Love Through the Years by Leslie Moore Love and marriage are still alive and well. Sasee sat down with three couples who’ve been married 26, 46 and 51 years and are still very much in love. Trying to find out what makes a good marriage is not easy – and maybe there’s not a one size fits all formula, but for Dick and Cindy Burch, Eileen and Sam Abrams and Norma and Frank Grant, marriage is the answer to a happy life. The first thing I noticed about Cindy and Dick Burch is they laugh almost every time they look at each other. After being around them awhile, it was also obvious that they are connected in that deep way that only comes from loving and living through good times and bad. Cindy and Dick are sixteen year residents of Myrtle Beach; their two children are “beach babies” according to Cindy. Dick is the CFO of South Atlantic Bank, and Cindy works part-time as the receptionist for Bellamy Law Firm. This attractive couple met in November of 1983 in Columbia, where they both worked for state government. Introduced by friends at a local shag dance club, the two hit it off immediately and began dating. Their courtship progressed quickly, and Dick and Cindy were married on September 15, 1984. “Our wedding was very traditional,” says Cindy. “We got married in my hometown in the Upstate of S.C., in my family’s church and the reception was held in an airplane hangar on my aunt and uncle’s property.” The couple had about 400 guests – most of Cindy’s hometown was invited, and Dick’s friends and family all came from his hometown of Walterboro, S.C. When I asked Cindy if there were any wedding bloopers she’d like to share, she laughed and told me that Dick’s first cousin was known for his practical jokes, but they thought they had outsmarted him until he tried to dive into the car with the newly married couple just as they were driving away! But, it was all in fun, and after a brief honeymoon, the couple began their life together. After Cindy and Dick’s first child, a son, was born, Cindy was conflicted. At the time, she was making the bigger salary, but knew she wanted to devote herself to raising her children full-time. The couple decided to take the plunge, and Cindy became a stay-athome mom to her son, and a daughter soon joined the family. “I devoted myself 200% to raising my children, and Dick has been a wonderful hands-on dad and partner, totally committed to our family. Currently, our son is a graduate assistant at the Citadel and our
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daughter is a sophomore at Clemson. Both are happy and successful.” After the Burch’s daughter left for college, the couple didn’t know what to do with themselves without the children to focus on. Cindy decided to schedule a routine colonoscopy – something she had not had time to do before. What happened brought the couple to their knees. “I remember telling Dick while I was doing the prep for the test that I knew I’d be hungry afterward and wanted to go somewhere good for lunch,” Cindy remembers. Unfortunately, the test revealed a large, suspicious polyp, and lunch was forgotten. “I made Dick go back to work – I knew how worried he was. The biopsy was supposed to come back in a few days, but I got the call the next day while I was at work. The nurse wanted me to come in to talk to the doctor, but she wouldn’t tell me anything else. You know what that means.” Cindy told me about this horrible day with tears in her eyes. At the doctor’s office, Dick and Cindy held onto each other for comfort while hearing the ominous diagnosis of cancer. A bright spot was that the doctor didn’t think the cancer had spread, and that it had been caught early. The couple drove straight to see their pastor, who advised them to tell their children immediately. “Telling them was one of the hardest things we’ve ever done,” Cindy said. “ We drove to Charleston to tell our son and then straight to Clemson to tell our daughter.” After a four hour surgery, Cindy’s cancer was gone. The surgeon was able to completely remove her tumor and it had not spread beyond her colon. Thankfully, there was no need to have any chemotherapy or radiation. While healing from her ordeal,
Columbia. “I’m giving away my age, but at that time Mr. Penny was still living.” His love of his hometown eventually brought him home to Conway and the family business, a move he has never regretted. Sam and Eileen renovated the store in 1994, carefully updating this lovely building to preserve its historic value. Little did they know it would only be three short years before they would be forced to renovate again. On February 27, 1997, a fire started in downtown Conway that left a swath of destruction through the small historic district. While Abrams was not burned, water on the roof caused it to cave in, destroying over half of everything inside. “The people of Conway were so helpful to us,” remembers Eileen. “We were devastated. But we were only completely closed for two weeks, even though it took us until October of 1998 to complete the repairs and renovation. Other than losing family members, this was the worst thing that has ever happened to us. One of the people who did the renovation told us that most businesses never come back from “I was a something like this, but we did!” baby when I got Today, Sam and Eileen work together running Abrams. She does married – really I all the advertising; he does the office work, and they do the buying togethwas,” said Eileen er. I asked Eileen about working with her husband every day and, with a Abrams when we big smile on her face, she told me she “works with her best friend and it’s began to talk not hard at all.” about her life with As much as she loves her work, Eileen did not plan on makher husband Sam. ing retail her career. After her two sons were in school, Eileen went to “Sam attended college to fulfill her promise to her mother. Not only did she complete two years of colher bachelor’s degree, she went on to receive a master’s degree in education lege at U.N.C. in and started working at Horry Georgetown Technical College when the Chapel Hill, but death of her father-in-law changed her plans. he didn’t like it “I had only been working nine weeks when we lost Sam’s father. I and transferred to knew I couldn’t leave him to run the business alone, so I came to help – U.S.C. in temporarily I thought, but I must have gotten my foot caught in the Columbia. I door! I went on a buying trip with Sam and loved it. Like my grandalways said he mother said to me, ‘Man plans, transferred there to God smiles.’” meet me!” When I asked Eileen Eileen and Sam what they would tell was in high young couples just starting out school in her about marriage, they told me home town of the story of their wedding. “The Columbia when she was invited to a fraternity party at U.S.C. She first Rabbi told us during the cerestarted dating Sam’s roommate, but it didn’t take her long to realize she mony that a true marriage was a was “dating the wrong roommate!” 50/50 partnership, so each of us Only 18 years old when she began to date Sam, Eileen’s mother would need to give 90%! If we reluctantly gave her permission for he and Eileen to marry just after she both would do that, then we turned 19. “My mother loved Sam and his family, and she knew how would have a true 50/50 marmuch I loved him. Her only request was that I finish college, which I did, riage partnership.” Eileen went quite a few years later.” on to say, “Love is unselfish – Sam and Eileen Abrams have been married 46 years and are the you think more about the other owners of Abrams, a 3rd generation business in Conway. “This building is than yourself. Sam and I took on the National Register of Historic Places,” Sam told me proudly. “The our marriage vows very seriousbusiness was started by my grandfather, and he opened multiple stores, but ly. There is no formula; you just then the depression hit. My father was in college at the time and came have to love each other.” home to help run the business. Eventually, all the stores closed except the one in Conway.” When Sam graduated, he went to work for J.C. Penny in
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Bridal Guide
Cindy depended on Dick to support her. “I only told Dick how frightened I was. He always knew what to say to make me feel better, and he is the only person I could have trusted with my feelings.” This brought more tears from Cindy and a few from Dick, who told me, “God told me what to say – any wisdom I had came from the Lord.” A year and a half later, Cindy remains cancer free. The couple took a “25th anniversary do-over” trip on their 26th anniversary, since Cindy had been sick for the original milestone. “This has been the best year ever for us,” Cindy said, with Dick nodding and smiling in agreement. “We have fun with friends and lots of fun together. We know the best is yet to come and our relationship is so much deeper – we know what’s important. And, please tell everyone to get a colonoscopy! Early detection saved my life.”
Love Blooms
Bridal Guide
Love Blooms
On the 24th of this month, Frank and Norma Grant will have been married 51 years. This year’s celebration will be small, but last year their children planned a huge 50th wedding anniversary party for their parents at Litchfield Country Club. Norma and Frank proudly showed me the photo album from that special day which featured a beautiful wedding cake, sit-down dinner and a band with a dance floor for the enjoyment of the nearly 200 guests. Frank and Norma began their life together on a much quieter note. Both were born and grew up in Georgetown. After their high school graduations, each left for college – Norma graduated from Staten Island College in New York and Frank from Voorhees College in Denmark, South Carolina. At the time, they didn’t really know each other that well, but both had relatives in and around New York City. After finishing college, each moved there for the summer, met and fell in love. The starryeyed young couple pledged to love each other forever in a small, intimate ceremony at 21 and 23 years old. Settling in New York, in the small fishing village of Freeport, on Long Island, Norma quickly had two children; a son first and a year and a day later, a daughter. Norma and Frank were devoted parents – spending much of their free time and resources on activities for the children. During her breaks from school Norma would take the children on educational trips while Frank stayed behind and worked. “I am so proud of Norma,” Frank said. “She was a good mother to our children.” The children continued to take top priority when Norma went back to school for her graduate degree. Frank changed his work schedule so he could be home while she was in class in the evening. “I hated those midnight shifts, but we both wanted the best for our children.”
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When I asked them what gives a marriage staying power, Norma told me that, “caring and sharing is the key. We are opposites in many ways, but we complement each other. How could we help each other if we thought the same way about everything?” Both thought the same way about their struggle to keep two children in college at once. “That was one of the hardest times in our marriage,” Frank remembers. Their son had fallen in love with the south during summer trips and attended U.S.C. in Columbia, while their daughter stayed closer to home in a state university, but both lived on campus. “I took a part time job,” laughed Norma. “I went into one of the exclusive department stores in Manhattan and asked for a job, and they hired me on the spot! Frank was shocked when I told him, but it helped us make ends meet.” Norma lovingly calls Frank her “bionic man” because of the joint replacement surgeries he’s undergone through the years, including both hips and knees. She remembers their 25th anniversary celebration was take-out from Red Lobster that she took to Frank’s hospital room. Not long after his recovery from that surgery, Frank took a fall from a ladder while doing some painting and nearly lost the use of his arm. “We’ve had our ups and downs, but me being able to nurture and care for Frank brought us closer together,” said Norma. “God stayed with me through all of it.” Both Norma and Frank knew they wanted to move after they retired, but they couldn’t decide where. Frank always missed his hometown, but Norma wasn’t so sure. They looked at Florida, Virginia Beach and even Atlanta for a place to settle. Finally, on one summer trip home to Georgetown, she realized this is where she belonged. The couple bought property and built their dream retirement home, moving here in March of 2003. Frank had worked for 31 years, retiring as a supervisor for the New York City Transit Authority, and Norma devoted 30 years to teaching elementary school. Retirement has been good for Norma and Frank. They love to travel and have gone to Alaska, Las Vegas and taken several cruises. They see their children and grandchildren as much as possible; their son lives outside of Atlanta and has two children. Strong faith plays the biggest role in their lives, and both are active in their churches – yes, churches. Norma returned to the church she grew up in – Bethel A.M.E. and Frank rejoined his home church, Arnett A.M.E. “We support each other in church activities,” said Norma. “It works for us.”
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Love Blooms
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Bridal Guide
Have a wedding in the future? answers the what to give question
Bridal Guide
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Love Blooms A Ladies Boutique
We have the outfit for all your occasions
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Bridal Guide
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Bridal Guide
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Victoria’s Ragpatch
Whether you’re attending a wedding or an attendant in a wedding…visit Frugal Princess to see if we have the perfect dress for you… we strive to provide the quality and prices you want and deserve! Beginning May 10th Frugal Princess has expanded hours and services including alterations and custom designed shirts, bags and spa items Tues-Fri 11 am-5 pm | Sat 10 am-2 pm
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Love Blooms Bridal Guide
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Bridal Guide
Love Blooms
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An Invitation
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l L a i e f e R Romance by Diane Stark
“Diane, why haven’t you brought the kids over yet?” my mother-in-law said into the phone. “I’m waiting to watch them so you and Eric can go out.” “Eric isn’t home from work yet,” I said, fighting tears “He’s late on your anniversary?” I tried to respond, but my tears took over. “All right, I’m calling him,” she said emphatically. “I’m going to let him have it too. I’m going to tell him that his wife is home crying on her anniversary – and it’s all his fault.” She sighed and muttered, “That boy is really going to hear about it now.” Ten minutes later, Eric dashed through the door, already apologizing. “Baby, I’m sorry,” he said, sounding breathless. “I got hung up at work, and I just lost track of time.” I shrugged, not ready to forgive him yet. I folded my arms and gave him my best pouty face. “Did your mom yell at you?” He nodded. “She said that I need to treat you better.” He hung his head. “And she’s right. You deserve better. I’m really sorry, Honey.” I felt my anger melt. He was obviously sorry. “It’s all right,” I said. “Let’s not let this ruin our evening.” We went to my mother-in-law’s house to drop off the kids, where I received a hug, and my husband got a stern look. When we were back in the car, I grinned at Eric and asked, “So where are we going?” He shrugged. “Where would you like to go?” I nodded knowingly. “Oh, you’re not going to tell me, huh? It’s a surprise.” Eric gave me a quizzical look. “Yeah, I guess so since you haven’t told me where you want to go.” My mouth dropped open. “You didn’t make a reservation?” “I didn’t know I was supposed to,” was his answer. My husband is a wonderful man with many terrific qualities, but he is utterly clueless when it comes to all things romantic. He is a great father, and he works hard at his job. He listens to me and values my opinions. He even helps around the house. On a day-to-day basis, there’s no one I’d rather be married to. He’s absolutely terrific. So when a guy is that great on a normal day, one would expect him to be even better on a special occasion. But he isn’t. On special occasions, he’s still just his normal great self. And on special occasions, normal every-day great can be somewhat disappointing.
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Some friends of ours recently got married after maintaining a long-distance relationship for over a year. To bridge the 1000-mile gap, Aaron sent dozens of flower arrangements, romantic greeting cards, and thinking-of-you gifts. I’ve never seen a man work so hard to get a girl to fall for him! To be honest, hearing about their courtship made me jealous. Eric had already earned my love, and he knew it. And I guess that meant the romance was over. After hearing about our friends’ latest romantic evening, I casually mentioned that I’d like to be treated like that once in a while. “What do you mean? I treat you really well,” Eric protested. “Yes, you do, but you’re not romantic,” I said. I began to list the proof of his romantic deficiencies. “You never send me flowers or make dinner reservations for my birthday or our anniversary. Heck, we don’t even have a song!” I whined. “I’m sorry, Baby,” he said. “I’ll try to do better.” “We’ve been married for four years,” I said, “and I’m starting to think you’re never going to change.” That night, our two-year-old son, Nathan, was crying in his crib. I started to get up, but Eric patted my shoulder. “Go back to sleep, Honey. I’ll get him,” he whispered. I lay in bed, listening to my husband comfort our son. I could hear him murmuring soothing words and finally, he began to sing. “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,” he sang. I smiled. I always sang that song to Nathan too. Laying there in bed, listening to my two guys, I made an important realization: Eric wasn’t the only one who needed to change. When Eric finally came back to bed, Nathan sleeping soundly once again, I laid my head on his shoulder. “Thank you, Honey, for getting up with him.” “That’s all right,” he said. “You handle all of the daytime tears. I figured it was my turn.” “You know earlier today when I complained that we don’t have a song? I think we do,” I whispered in the dark. “That Sunshine song you were singing to Nathan? That’s the one I always sing to him.” Eric chuckled softly. “I don’t think that’s the kind of song you meant.” “I know, but I realized something when you were with Nathan. Romance isn’t just flowers and candles and dinner in fancy restaurants. It’s also getting up with the baby so I can sleep. It’s washing the dishes because you know it’s my least favorite chore. It’s changing diapers and running errands and working hard for a paycheck to provide for your family.” I could feel his shoulder shrug. “That’s nice of you, Babe, but I need to make more of an effort with the real romantic stuff. It’s not my strong suit, you know.” “I’ve noticed that, but I also need to look for romance in the nice things you do every day.” I laughed and added, “That’s not my strong suit, you know.” But I’m working on it. Yes, there seems to be a lack of fresh-cut roses at my house, but Eric offers an abundance of loving gestures, if I just take the time to appreciate them. After all, every-day great is still pretty great.
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A Greeting Card Tip for Newlyweds by Janey Womeldorf
We have moved eight times. Each move was successful – except one. We were in the military, stationed in Florida, and after 13 years of service, decided to leave both for greener pastures. The military would store our belongings for up to two years while we searched for the what, when, where of our next life. We put the house up for sale, kept out four suitcases, and with no idea when we would see our possessions again, started the exhausting process of deciding what to store, what to chuck, and what we needed to keep with us. On moving day, three burly men feverishly wrapped and packed our entire house into brown boxes. The key to successful moving is in the detail – the more you write on the box, the easier it is to find things at the other end. Unfortunately, the sheer number of boxes meant that on many all we had time to write was “bedroom, kitchen, bathroom” etc., or the worst of all, “miscellaneous.” Once done, the movers pulled out a roll of sticky numbers and a clipboard to perform the inventory. One man stuck a number on each item or box, then shouted out, “Number 13 kitchen box; 14 kitchen box; 15 bedroom box,” and so on. His partner then scribbled down the item description against the inventory sheet’s corresponding number. By the end of the day, our inventory stretched over five pages, including 156 items, almost 100 of which were boxes. Ten hours after arriving, the movers packed our 156 items into three giant crates, then sealed them shut, ready for transportation to a storage facility. We stood in silence and ignored the pit in our stomachs as we watched the truck drive off, our lives in the back. Two hours and four suitcases later, with the “for sale” sign still in the yard, we set off on our own journey. We were heading to Michigan to that place where all children go when they are jobless and homeless – Mom and Dad’s. One exhausting job search, two furnished apartments and 18 months later, we were established again and living in Tennessee. We had sold our Florida home, bought a new one and were desperate to see all our stuff again. As ill-fate would have it, a family health issue meant I would be away when the
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moving truck came, so my husband would have to handle the delivery alone. As the packers wheeled furniture and boxes into the house, often stacked three high, they shouted out sticker numbers like a fast-paced game of bingo. Unfortunately, there was no order to the numbers, leaving my husband scrambling back and forth over five pages of inventory, trying to check off delivery of each item, while simultaneously instructing the packers where to take each box. In less than three hours, their truck was empty, and row after row of generic brown boxes lined every wall of our new home. The packers hovered while my husband checked the inventory list. He was crushed to find one item – labeled simply “miscellaneous box” – unaccounted for. Unfortunately, their truck was empty and with no way of re-checking every single item, my husband had no choice but to sign on the dotted line. For the second time in 18 months, he watched the truck drive off, once more with a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. Of the 156 items that were loaded in Florida, only 155 made it to our new home. In time, the missing item would reveal itself; we just hoped it was nothing valuable. How wrong we would be. From the beginning of our relationship, I made it a habit of keeping every card we had ever given each other – whether for a birthday, Valentines, sorry, thank-you or anniversary. Afterwards, I would write on the back; the occasion, the date, how we celebrated, what we ate, what we wore, or any other fun and special memories from the day. Then, still in its envelope, I placed the card into a giant red shoe box which contained all our other memories and keepsakes. I labeled it our “Love Box.” Several months later, we celebrated our wedding anniversary. After the celebration was over, I made some fun notes on the back of the card then went in search of our precious “love box.” After hours of laboring through all the still-unopened boxes, horror gripped me as I realized the unthinkable – it was the missing box. Years of memories lost forever. I felt gutted. About a year later, I was paying bills when the phone rang. After verifying my name and address, the young lady announced she was from the moving company that had moved us the previous year. They had located a box which they had traced back to us and she wanted to verify our details. My heart skipped a bit, blood rushed through my body, and I burst into tears right there on the phone. A few days later, a battered, bruised box arrived at our home. When we opened it up and saw our huge, red “Love Box” inside, I sobbed for the second time that week. We recently celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary over a decadent bottle of red wine, a simple meal of warm bread, cheese and pesto, and our red love box. Duct tape now holds together its 20 years of bulging memories. We took it in turns to reach in, pull out a card, then read the message and notes on the back. Forgotten memories flooded back. We laughed, we cried, and we remembered. It was one of the most romantic and magical evenings we have ever shared. So, a note to newlyweds: Start writing and start keeping. Take time to make notes, and in years to come, the notes and memories on all those greeting cards will bring you more joy than you can possibly imagine. And if you ever have to move, consider keeping them with you. Memories are priceless; lost ones are gut-wrenching.
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u o r Y S e s ’ c t r a et? h W by Kim Seeley
My husband and I were seeking advice from the local Social Security office. Our counselor was a friendly, ex-military gentleman, and he was a classic combination of professionalism and personality. In the middle of our interview, he told my husband, “I’m going to put you on the spot. When were you two married?” My husband replied, “July 24th, 1976; we remember it because our daughter’s birthday is the day after it, and it was the bicentennial year.” We were a little surprised by his response. “Wow!” he said. “That’s a long time. What’s your secret?” Without missing a beat, I replied, “We both have an extremely high tolerance for pain.” The three of us laughed out loud, drawing curious glances from the other cubicle dwellers in the room. Since that day a few weeks ago, I have repeated my response to friends, knowing they would get a good laugh out of it. But the question has also made me think on a deeper level, “What is our secret? Is there a secret?” We haven’t hit the 50 year mark, as many other couples have, but we are approaching the 35 year mark. The counselor in the Social Security office was impressed by our marital longevity. We later learned in that interview that he had been divorced and re-married several years ago; perhaps that prompted his question. But is there one answer, or perhaps I should ask, is there any answer?
My initial response is that there is no pat answer as to why some marriages endure and others end up in the family court. This question reminds me of the question posed by Willard Scott to the folks who have reached the century mark on the Today Show. “To what do you attribute your longevity?” A white-haired lady of 102 responds that she has never smoked a cigarette nor touched a drop of alcohol in her life. The grey-haired gentleman of 101 years of age claims that a good cigar and a daily dose of scotch contribute to his lengthy lifespan. They both have their pictures on the Smuckers label, but they took totally oppositional paths to reach it. When I examine our 35 years of marriage, I see many contributing factors to our resilience, but no one outstanding “secret.” Have there been times when one of us could have walked? I suppose some people might have, but I never seriously entertained the thought. I will admit to sleeping on the sofa once or twice when terribly upset, so I cannot respond that couples should “never go to bed angry.” Some anger takes time to go away, and nightfall doesn’t cure all ails. I believe one thing in our favor is that we took our wedding vows seriously. We meant every single word of “in sickness and health, till death do you part.” We also have a strong faith in God and a similar religious upbringing, which has helped us through a multitude of trials. When our youngest daughter died nearly eight years ago, we read all the literature that warned about the high divorce rate of couples who have lost children. I can’t imagine anyone else in this world who would know our pain like we know each other’s. Why would we turn to an outsider?
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We also chose wisely and well, following our hearts and our heads. We were head over heels in love, but we were both greatly aware of the abundance of other character traits each of us brought to this union. I knew beyond any shadow of a doubt, that as much as I loved this physical body of my husband, that I loved his spirit and his heart even more. I knew I had found someone I could trust, someone who was steady and strong as a rock. I believe he felt the same trust in me. We were equally aware that each of us brought a good sense of humor into this union. My husband is well known for his droll sense of wit, dropping a line into the conversation that leaves folks in stitches. If there is one aspect of marriage that is often overlooked, I would suggest that it might be a sense of humor. Marry someone who makes you laugh, and laugh whenever possible. Another secret to a long marriage might very well be one that few people would dare to admit – adjusted expectations. Notice I did not say “lowered expectations,” just “adjusted expectations.” When I was dating my husband, I had been given plenty of hints that he was not a big spender or an overly romantic fellow. Our courtship was not dotted with lavish flowers or extravagant presents. There have been times in thirty-five years of marriage that I have wished for one big extremely romantic gesture, but that is not my husband’s nature. I am reminded of the fable of the fox and the gingerbread man. The gingerbread man knew the nature of the fox when he stepped onto his back to cross the river. Before the fox eats the gingerbread man, he states, “You knew I was a fox when you asked for a ride.” My husband is no fox, but he is still the same conservative country boy that I married; he hasn’t changed midstream. So, if I were to answer the Social Security counselor seriously, what would I say? What is our secret? We fell in love with both our hearts and our heads in full agreement. We are both committed to our marriage and our faith as much as we were thirty-five years ago. We both felt, and still feel, a sense of trust in each other. It always helps to have a sense of humor. We have learned to adjust some of our expectations along the way. Neither of us is perfect, but we are perfectly happy to be married to each other. Hopefully, we will make it to the big 50th anniversary mark, but even if death separates us before that, our marriage has been quite a ride.
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Today is Valentine’s Day, a perfect time to announce our daughter, Katie’s, engagement to Michael. He popped the question a few weeks ago, and it’s an amazing story. Their introduction was perfect – when it finally took place – and they’ve been together ever since. Though it was their friends’ second attempt to set them up, it almost didn’t happen at all.
A
At the first gathering, Michael came, hoping to meet this blonde-haired, blue-eyed girl who sounded pretty cool. But Katie didn’t make it, so she missed meeting this black-haired, blue-eyed boy who also sounded pretty cool. A second get-together was set. This time Katie went, but Michael couldn’t make it. As a chemist, he was finishing up four days of twelve-hour shifts. About 10 pm the group of seven drove to the Triangle Lounge. Katie said she’d pass; she was tired and had to get up early the next morning. But they persuaded her since Rodney and April had a secret plan: they called Michael – who was snoozing comfortably at home – and insisted he come and meet Katie RIGHT THEN! Michael fell back asleep, but mysteriously was jerked awake. (He says now that something made him get up and go.) Finally they met. The next morning Katie was all smiles. She said they talked the whole night, and she liked him a lot. Later that day Michael invited her to play tennis, even mentioning future dates: walks on the beach, skiing. She agreed and reciprocated, by inviting him to her cousin Lindsay’s wedding, in Raleigh (Katie was a bridesmaid), and he gladly accepted. Just imagine, on their third date he met Katie’s entire family! Talk about a unique first date: they met at a sushi restaurant downtown, each driving separately – too bad, I wanted to meet Michael! On the sidewalk, an acting scout invited Katie to be an extra in Hollywood East, a locally filmed TV show. Katie was intrigued, but said her date was waiting upstairs at Yosaké. “Fine,” the woman said, “he can be in the show too.” Michael loved the idea and was ready to leave. But Katie insisted they have dinner first. Afterwards, they went across the street and were assigned parts as extras. I ask you: what are the chances? Michael has already blessed our family immensely – I hope we have his. Interestingly, I discovered Michael’s parents own Olympia, the finest Greek restaurant ever. The shock was, Russell and I’d been going there three years but had never met the owners. Michael himself is a wonderful chef. He prepares divine pasta carbonara right here in our kitchen! He’s even teaching Katie how to cook. Also, we’ve fallen in love with his dog, Gus (now Katie’s dog, too), non-animal lovers that hub-Russ and I are. I even wrote a column about him. When Katie returned to school (for nursing), Michael’s family hired her as a part-time waitress. Michael often bartends – he, too, is going back to school. His family is very close, warm and gregarious, and his relatives hail from New York, Pennsylvania and
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Greece. We’ve enjoyed New Years Eve at the restaurant, complete with authentic belly dancing, and an amazing Easter feast where we experienced delicious new foods and interesting customs. At Christmas, we hosted his family in our home for my first ever standing rib roast – which was magnificent, if I say so myself. But my favorite story deals with their engagement. In December, after dating fourteen months, Michael asked Katie to go snow-skiing in Sugar Mountain. I knew they were getting serious and had discussed marriage. Both seemed ready, yet time marched on. As Christmas drew closer, I imagined Katie was hoping for a ring. She’d hinted that when the time came, Michael would first ask us for her hand in marriage. The trip was fast approaching, and I was getting nervous – at least, for her sake. The night before their trip, Russell and I dined at Olympia. They were both working and visited our table, even sitting with us off and on. Katie was getting us drink refills (about fifteen feet away), when Michael sat down and blurted out, in a hushed tone: “So, I’d like to ask you for Katie’s hand in marriage.” Do what? No warning, no casual leading up to it, no clearing his throat or cracking his knuckles. I was so shocked my jaw dropped. During this time, Katie would walk over, chat a moment, then leave. In between her visits, I (being the big mouth) told Michael how much we adored him, and how happy he’d made Katie. Russell echoed my sentiments and offered best wishes. Keep in mind, we couldn’t react: no hugs, handshakes or pats on the back. Eventually I realized we’d not answered his question, so I said, “Michael, the answer to your question is ‘YES!’” This, I also had to whisper. He smiled and nodded, appreciatively. Katie came back to the table, and Michael went back to the bar. I don’t know how I kept a straight face. I do know we quickly left after that. That night Katie packed, and I remained quiet (a tough feat). When they arrived the next day, she called – but didn’t mention a ring. She called again the next afternoon, describing the cozy surroundings but difficult skiing maneuvers. Again, no mention of a ring. Finally, she called that night, and I knew instinctively “this is it!” I picked up the phone and heard her breathless squealing, “Moooooooom! I’m engaged!” And what a celebration it has been! The date will be September, 2012, because Katie wants to finish nursing school. The location will be our beautiful church in downtown Wilmington. It’ll be a great affair because Morris weddings (my maiden name) are often interesting, sometimes quirky and always entertaining! (And did I mention FUN?) We are thrilled beyond measure! Isn’t this what every parent wants for their child? To find true love and happiness? One thing’s for sure: whether it’s a big fat Greek wedding – we’ve already been asked – or a small skinny Greek wedding, it’ll be a marriage made in heaven with a honeymoon in Greece!
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gets candid
Meet Rachel Pelfry
Rachel Pelfry is passionate about dancing. Listening to her talk about why she loves to dance, I realized that this 19-year-old dance teacher at Fred Astaire Dance Studio in Myrtle Beach has a wealth of knowledge that belies her years. Rachel, when did you start teaching dance? I came to Fred Astaire Dance Studio as a student – I love Dancing with the Stars and wanted to dance like they do. My mother dragged me in here, and I was blown away. I looked around and saw that everyone here was a dancer! I’d never seen people so passionate about anything, and I wanted to be a part of it. After a few months I learned of an opening for a teacher and started bugging the owner, Juan Gonzalez, about hiring me. Thank goodness he took a chance on me! I love it and can’t think of anything else I would rather do. Do you get a lot of engaged couples coming in to learn to dance at their wedding? Yes, we do. I always ask them to bring in the song they want to dance to, and we can decide the right dance to fit the music. If they don’t dance at all, I concentrate on teaching them the basic steps and being able to move around on the dance floor. It’s also important to be able to talk to each other while they’re dancing – at first, most beginners want to concentrate on the steps. The more a couple practices, of course, the better they’ll be. You develop muscle memory with practice and don’t have to think about the dance steps. I would advise a couple to come in a few months before the wedding to give themselves plenty of time. But, if your wedding is very close, don’t worry, we can work with you and make your wedding dance a success.
What about single people who want to learn to dance? You don’t need a partner to take lessons. We have male and female teachers who can teach anyone to dance. It’s fun! We have social dances on Friday nights and group dance nights during the week. You can also take private lessons anytime.
One couple recently learned the Argentine Tango. It’s a lovely dance and a little different from the American Tango. One story says that the gauchos or Argentinean cowboys would come into town and go to the local saloons. These were tiny places, with tables throughout, so they would dance with the saloon girls in small steps, in and around the tables. The girls would lean back away from the gauchos because they smelled bad, and they would keep their hands near his pockets to remind him that this was not a free dance.
Some of our students decide to compete in national competitions. Fred Astaire sponsors dance competitions around the country. Rachel, what do you do when you’re not working? I usually work from around 10 in the morning until 10 or 11 at night. By that time, I just go home, eat and sleep. On the weekends, we go out and dance. So, when I’m not dancing at work, I’m dancing – somewhere. I have the best job in the world. I get to dress in beautiful clothes every day and dance! For more information about Fred Astaire Dance Studio, call 843-916-2202.
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May 2011
SUNDAY, APRIL 10, 2011
SMALLER TREASURES THROUGH THE AGES 4:00 p.m., First Presbyterian Church Great Hall on the Kings Hwy. campus A program of some of the most popular orchestral works written for smaller forces, from the Baroque energy of J.S. Bach’s beloved Brandenburg Concerto No. 2 to the Classical Period experimentation of Franz Joseph Haydn’s Symphony No. 22 (“The Philosopher”), the lush Romanticism of Richard Wagner’s Siegfried Idyll and a pair of American masterpieces: Charles Ives’ metaphysical The Unanswered Question and Aaron Copland’s Appalachian Spring ballet music.
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Youth Orchestra Spring Concert on April 14, 2011
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8-9
Low Country Herb Society Annual Herb Sale, 8 am-5 pm, Inlet Culinary Gardens. For more info, call 843-650-2565 or e-mail lchsnews_info@yahoo.com.
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Creative Exchange Series, “Life & times of Nashville singer/songwriter/guitarist/vocalist Rickey Godfrey,” Sunset River Marketplace, 10283 Beach Drive, Calabash N.C., 11 am-12:30 pm, lunch included, $5, RSVP required. For more info, call 910-575-5999.
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9
16-17
16-17, 23-24
S.O.S. Spring Safari, various venues, North Myrtle Beach. For more info, call 843-280-5570.
Plantacular Sale, Brookgreen Gardens, free with garden admission. For more info, call 843-235-6000.
Building Futures Autism Clinic 5K and 1 mile Run/ Walk, Market Common, 5K at 9 am, 1 Mile at 10:15 am. To register, visit www.sos-healthcare.com.
Art in the Park, 10 am-4 pm, 16-17 Chapin Park, Myrtle Beach, 23-24 Market Common, Valor Park, over 60 artists. For more info, call 843-446-7471.
“Night of the Rising Stars,” recital and exhibition of Young Treasures Scholars, presented by Cultural Council of Georgetown County, 7 pm, Holy Cross Faith Memorial Church, free. For more info, call 843-237-3035.
Moveable Feast, Ann B. Ross discusses Miss Julia Rocks the Cradle, 11 am, Kimbels, Wachesaw, $25. For more info, call 843-235-9600 or visit www.classatpawleys.com.
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5/7
Annual Dragon Boat Festival, 9 am-6 pm, Grand Park, Market Common. For more info, call 843-457-6330.
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The Scoop
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Visit www.sasee.com for a full calendar and more Sasee events!
“Heartland Hits Broadway,” Serendipity Singers, 3 pm, Trinity Presbyterian Church, Surfside, free. For more info, call 843-215-1171.
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Smaller Treasures Through the Ages, Long Bay Symphony, 4 pm, First Presbyterian Church Great Hall, Myrtle Beach. For more info, call 843-448-8379.
Art Walk, Downtown Conway Historic District, 10 am-5 pm, 843-248-6260 or www.conwaymainstreet.com.
This National Historic Landmark is home to the only Association of Zoos and Aquariums accredited zoo on the coast in the Carolinas, and one of the most significant sculpture collections in the world! From overland excursions on the Trekker to garden tours and new exhibits, there is always something new and exciting at Brookgreen. For more information call or visit our website
(800) 849-1931 www.brookgreen.org
Admission: $12 Adults, $10 Seniors, $6 Children 4-12 & Children under 3 are FREE!
Butterfly Exhibit Opens Spring 2011 Admission is Good for 7 Days! On Highway 17 south of Myrtle Beach between Murrells Inlet and Pawleys Island.
Advertiser Index
16th Street Salon . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33 131 Digital . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35 Accents by Carol . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 All Beauty Cosmetics, Inc. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43 Anything Joe’s . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33 Brookgreen Gardens . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45 Butler’s Electric Supply . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35 Celebration Music Theatre . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 Coastal Carolina Breast Center . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35 Coastal Uncorked . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47 Douglas Diamond Jewelers . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3 Fresh Cut Florist . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46 Grand Strand Primary . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37 Hammock Shops . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 Hannah Bs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 Homespun Crafters Mall . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43 In Style Hair Design . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37 Island Floors & Rugs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37
JJ Rich . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 Little Darlings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46 Long Bay Symphony . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43 Maguire Law Firm . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 Marina Inn at Grande Dunes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46 McLeod Health . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7 Miller-Motte Myrtle Beach . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45 Myrtle Beach Mall . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 The Palace Theatre . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37 Palm Shoes & Collection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39 Palmetto Ace Home Center . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 Pawleys Island Realty . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 Pawleys Lifestyles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 Pee Dee Orthopaedic Associates, PA . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 Personal Touch Med Spa . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43 Roper St. Francis Healthcare . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33 Rose Arbor Fabrics . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 Shades & Draperies . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5
Strand Styling Studio . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39 Take 2 Resale . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 Taz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 WEZV . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43 Bridal Guide Abrams Department Store . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31 Art & Soul . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20 Barbara’s Fine Gifts . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27 Burroughs & Chapin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27 Carolina Charm Florist . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20 Christopher’s Fine Jewelry . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21 Croissants Bistro & Bakery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28 David E. Grabeman, D.D.S., P.A. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21 Dr. Sattele’s . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18 Eleanor Pitts Fine Gifts & Jewelry . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23 Frugal Princess Boutique . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30 Grady’s Jewelers . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 Greg Norman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30
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Island Shoes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 The Kangaroo Pouch . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28 The Little White Dress . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32 The Market Common . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19 Medieval Times . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20 Middle Child Photography . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28 Mykonos . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28 Pawleys Island Bakery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31 Pawleys Island Swimwear . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23 Priceless Desserts . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23 Sassy Girl . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21 Sassyfras . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27 Studio 77 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31 Taylor’s Boutique . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 Ultratan . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30 Victoria’s Ragpatch . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30 Waynes View Photography . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23
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Little Darlings Ch i l d r e n ’ s B ou t i qu e
“Because they’re only little once.”
New and resale BOUTIQUE brand clothing
monogram gifts • Sun San Saltwater Sandals • Itzy Bitzy Squeeky Shoes hair bows, flower clips, Kufi hats • Little Giraffe products coupon: $10 off $20 or more! expires April 30, 2011
Located in MARKET COMMON, Dockside community shops 2954-D Howard Ave. MB, SC • ph. 843-839-1497 mon-sat 11-6 • www.littledarlingschildrensboutique.com
We make every occasion special. 909 Norman Alley, Conway, SC 29526 • 843-488-0859
H
OLIDAY BRUNCH CELEBRATIONS Marina Inn at Grande Dunes
“Easter Sunday” and “Mothers Day”
These annual celebrations include creatively prepared brunch favorites from omelets and southern grits to local seafood, fresh salads,carved meats, a children’s buffet, homemade desserts and more! Both events are served from 11:00 am to 2:30 pm in the Nautilus Ballroom with entertainment by Judy Duva Duo. $38.00++ per adult & $15.00++ per child ages 4-12
Call 843.913.9368 for reservations or for more information www.marinainnatgrandedunes.com/sasee The Anchor Café opens for the season on April 8th! Come join the fun at Myrtle Beach’s favorite waterfront cafe! 8121 Amalfi Place, Myrtle Beach, SC 29572 The Marina Inn at Grande Dunes is located off 17 Bypass just north of 82nd Ave. in Myrtle Beach on the Intracoastal Waterway. Turn into Grande Dunes, then first left. ++ Please add tax and gratuity
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2ND ANNUAL COASTAL UNCORKED FOOD AND WINE FESTIVAL, FEATURING PAULA DEEN! Coastal Uncorked is the area’s premier food, wine and spirits festival This year’s event builds on the amazing 2010 inaugural festival
MAY 12 | GOLF TOURNAMENT
This Year’s Coastal Uncorked Golf Tournament will be held at championship courses and include local chefs and wine representatives at multiple holes with tasting samples, beer and spirits tastings.
MAY 13-14 | TASTING TROLLEYS
Tasting Trolleys will take guests around 10 premiere stops. Themed locations feature wine, beer and spirits tastings, cooking demonstrations and live music. Also this year: • Market Common Wine Tasting Tent & Gourmet Village in Valor Park • Coastal Untapped in Plyler Park along Ocean Boulevard
MAY 14 | PAULA DEEN COOKING DEMONSTRATION
Paula Deen signature main event includes a meet & greet, VIP book signing and cooking demonstration at The Alabama Theatre.
MAY 8-15 | RESTAURANT WEEK Featuring local restaurants offering special menus that complement the spirit of festival. Events include: • Three-Course Pre-fixed $20.11 Tasting Menu • Wine Dinners • Beer Dinners • Coastal Casuals
MAY 15 | FOOD CHALLENGE AND FINALE
Coastal Uncorked Food Challenge & Finale Event, with celebrity judges, Matt Lee and Ted Lee. This event highlights seven local chefs in a live “Iron-Chef”-style cooking competition, also featuring food, beer, wine and spirits tasting stations from participating restaurants and area businesses.
TICKETS AND ACCOMMODATIONS PACKAGES ARE NOW ON SALE VISIT WWW.COASTALUNCORKED.COM FOR TICKETS AND PRICING
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3/9/11 10:25 AM
Through Inspiration, Dedication and Change, let us bring out your Beauty $1,000 OFF Tummy Tuck $500 OFF Breast Enhancement $700 OFF Liposuction Expires 4/30/2011
D
uring the month of April, Sculpted Figures is offering a special savings on select cosmetic procedures. All you have to do is schedule a free consultation in April and bring this ad with you. At your consultation, Dr. Goldflies will examine the areas you’d like to improve and let you know what your appearance could be like after treatment. Dr. Myles Goldflies, Board Certified Plastic Surgeon, who has performed more than 10,000 procedures. Dr. Goldflies uses his artistry combined with the latest techniques in plastic surgery for the most beautiful, natural-looking results.
For a Free Consultation, Call 1-888-904-1280 Now! Call to schedule a FREE consultation today – before April 30th!
8212 Devon Court • Myrtle Beach www.SculptedFigures.com