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featured articles
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May 2011 Volume 10, Issue 5
who’s who
Last Bus
Publisher Delores Blount Sales & Marketing Director Susan Bryant Editor Leslie Moore Account Executives Kim Griffin Amanda Kennedy-Colie Erica Schneider Celia Wester Art Director Taylor Nelson Photography Director Patrick Sullivan Graphic Artist Scott Konradt Accounting Bart Buie CPA, P.A. Administrative Assistant Barbara J. Leonard Executive Publishers Jim Creel Bill Hennecy Tom Rogers
by Marsha Tennant
Thank you, Mom by Judie Schaal
Green Mountain State of Mind by Melissa Face
Hair!
by Sue Mayfield-Geiger
Southern Snaps by Leslie Moore
Fighting Aging One Irritant at a Time by Ann Ipock
8 Rules to Fun Family Vacations by Janey Womeldorf
Open Doors
by Cathy MacKenzie
How Water Saved Me From Drowning by Susan DeBow
The Dream House with the Babbling Brook by Felice Prager
PO Box 1389 Murrells Inlet, SC 29576 fax 843-626-6452 • phone 843-626-8911 www.sasee.com • info@sasee.com I n T h is I ssue Sallie Dent Porth – “Canner-in-Chief” of Sallie’s Greatest Jams . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8 Read It! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10 Sasee Gets Candid . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14 Women Who Mean Business . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34 A Mother’s Legacy . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36 Faves . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38 Scoop on the Strand . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40
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Sasee is published monthly and distributed free along the Grand Strand. For subscription info, see page 36. Letters to the editor are welcome, but could be edited for length. Submissions of articles and art are welcome. Visit our website for details on submission. Sasee is a Strand Media Group, Inc. publication.
Copyright © 2011. All rights reserved. Reproduction of any material, in part or in whole, prepared by Strand Media Group, Inc. and appearing within this publication is strictly prohibited. Title “Sasee” is registered with the U.S. Patent & Trademark Office.
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contributing writers Connie Barnard traveled the world as a military wife and taught high school and college composition for over 30 years. She has been a regular contributor to Sasee since its first issue in 2002. Susan DeBow is a Midwest writer with a Southern heart. She is currently working on her second book, The Irish Virgin, about her exploits in Ireland.
letter from the editor On the second Sunday of each May we celebrate motherhood. This month, I was able to talk to several daughters about why they work with and love their mothers, and I started to think about my own mom, who I lost, two days after Mother’s Day, in 1992. Every time something happens with my own children, I wish I could call her. Every time I feel down, I wish I could have just one more hug. And, every time I make homemade pimento cheese, I wish I could taste hers just one more time. But, unlike so many who have lost a parent, I still have a mother who offers hugs and encouragement anytime I need them. She’s my mother-in-law, and, for her presence in my life, I am truly grateful. Faye Graves raised nine children, all of whom inherited her kindness and love of family. She lost two sons; I was married to one of them. Pain like this either destroys you or brings an understanding and appreciation of the many blessings left here on Earth. My “steel magnolia” mother-in-law chose the latter – her faith keeps her strong, and her love brings her peace. I love you, Faye. Happy Mother’s Day.
A native South Carolinian, Lisa Hamilton is the director of the First Presbyterian Church Preschool and Kindergarten. Of course she loves reading, but also finds time for cooking and walking her dog, Hurley. Ann Ipock is an award-winning Southern humorist and speaker who writes for the Georgetown Times, Sasee and Columbia County Magazine. Ann lives in Wilmington, N.C. with her husband, Russell. Life is Short, I Wish I Was Taller (published October, 2010) completes the Life is Short trilogy. Contact Ann through her website, www.annipock.com. Cathy MacKenzie enjoys writing poetry, short stories and essays and hopes to complete a novel. She also paints with pastels, her favorite subjects being her grandchildren. She lives in Halifax, Nova Scotia.
cover artist
Sue Mayfield-Geiger is a freelance writer and editor residing on the Texas Gulf Coast. Contact Sue at www.smgwriter.com.
Carla, by Jose Roldan Rendon Influenced by his father’s passion to draw, Jose Roldan Rendon embarked on his creative journey in early childhood in a small coastal village named Barbate in the South of Spain. He became a painter, illustrator and photographer. Jose continued his passion for art in Sevilla at Belles Artes University. Upon moving to Brooklyn, New York, Jose has applied his style and talent to create murals and faux finishing for his new company, www.Brushdecor.com, and has been commissioned by clients in Virginia, Washington D.C. and New York. The image on the cover is a 2’ x 3’ acrylic painting on canvas. The scene was captured on the train from Paris to Marseille, France. Please contact the artist for mural and painting sales at 917-855-6310 or info@brushdecor.com.
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Melissa Face lives in Virginia with her husband, son and dog. Her stories and essays have appeared in Chicken Soup for the Soul and Cup of Comfort. E-mail Melissa at writermsface@yahoo.com.
Felice Prager is a freelance writer and author of the recently released book, Quiz It: Arizona from Arthur McAllister Publishers. To find out more about Felice’s book, please visit http://www.QuizItAZ.com. Judie Schaal is a 31 year resident of the Grand Strand. She is married to her favorite golf pro, Gary. She has two grown children and three grandchildren. She has written for The Sun News as a tennis columnist and On the Green. Marsha Tennant is the author of the children’s book, Margaret, Pirate Queen, and lives in Calabash with hubby, Randy; dog, Callie and cat, Clara. After 40 years in education, Marsha will be retiring in June to write the second pirate book that takes place on the Outer Banks. Marsha and Randy plan to travel and sleep in until 7 am! She can be reached at marshatennant@yahoo.com. Janey Womeldorf is a freelance writer who can lose hours in card shops. She scribbles away in Memphis, Tennessee.
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Sallie Dent Porth
“Canner-in-Chief” of Sallie’s Greatest Jams Sallie Dent Porth did not plan to be the “canner-in-chief” of Sallie’s Greatest jams, but is enjoying every minute! Officially launched in November 2010, Sallie’s Greatest was started when Sallie took her favorite hobby and turned it into a profitable business. Her customers couldn’t be happier with delicious flavors like, Blueberry + Lavender, Strawberry + Basil, Peach, Pepper + Ginger and more. Grand Strand residents will have a chance to meet Sallie – and taste her jams – at this year’s Coastal Uncorked Food, Wine and Spirits Festival on May 13 & 14, from 12-5 pm, in the Gourmet Village in Market Common. How did you start Sallie’s Greatest? I was raised in Calhoun County, South Carolina, and have lived somewhere in the state all of my life. But, I spent most of my career on planes, trains and automobiles up and down the East Coast doing medical sales. I started making jams and jellies about seven years ago when I married my husband. We had known each other since childhood and reconnected through my mother. I never dreamed I would marry and move back home, but that’s what I did! My mother-in-law is a fantastic cook and preserves everything fresh from the garden. She’s especially known for her peach jam. I wanted to branch out and do some different flavors, but continue to use fresh from the garden ingredients. My career gave me the opportunity to experience a lot of fine dining and wonderful flavors, and I always wanted to try the most unusual thing on the menu. Using my experiences and a natural ability to know what might taste good together, I combined down home flavors with unusual combinations and came up with my recipes. My first jam flavor was Strawberry + Basil. It turned out
very well, so I got braver with Blueberry, Lemon + Thyme and just keep going. I entered a contest sponsored by Garden and Gun magazine, which had the stipulation that if you won, you had to be willing to bring your product on the market. Well, I did win. They highlighted my Strawberry + Basil jam, and I was off and running. How is business? It’s great! We launched right before Thanksgiving, when the December/January issue of Garden and Gun was published. Over 250,000 people got that issue and I got LOTS of orders! At first, we just did online ordering, but now we have more than 28 retail locations. What does the future hold for Sallie’s Greatest? I’m developing new flavors now. I currently sell six flavors, but I have eight or nine more that are developed, and I hope to bring those to market over the course of the next year. It’s a lot of work, though. I use hand-chopped herbs and fresh fruits – you just can’t get that kind of flavor without freshness. You can use my jams for a lot more than just breakfast. While they are wonderful with cream cheese and a bagel or on toast, a sandwich with ham, brie and my Strawberry + Basil is fabulous. The Peach + Mint flavor goes great with lamb chops and the Peach, Pepper + Ginger makes a great braising sauce for pork loin. And, don’t get me started on the desserts – a trifle with my jam is out of this world! Contact Sallie at www.salliesgreatest.com and don’t miss seeing her while she is in our area during Coastal Uncorked. For more info, visit www.coastaluncorked.com.
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Lisa Says…Read The Weird Sisters, by Eleanor Brown by Lisa Hamilton 10 www.sasee.com
I always wanted a sister and was quite envious of friends who had one. I had brothers, and after reading Eleanor Brown’s The Weird Sisters, I retain the same wish. I have friends as close as a sister could be, and I love them dearly. There must be something so special about the world of sisters, which you truly get a glimpse of in this novel. One origin of the word weird is “wyrd,” meaning fate. The fate of the sisters Rosalind, Bianca and Cordelia, all names of heroines in Shakespearian Literature, take us on a journey infused with tragedy, truth and triumph. The Andreas family is a family of readers, the father a renowned Shakespeare professor at a local college. When the mother of the sisters is diagnosed with breast cancer, may
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everyone returns home to care for her and care for themselves. Each is dealing with their own troubles and secrets; their stories are revealed with the good, the bad and the ugly. Rose, the eldest, is in constant conflict between her heart and her brain. Bean, the middle sister, is beautiful, selfish and a party girl. Cordy, the baby, is a peace-loving, free spirit who returns home alone and pregnant. As the women care for and tend to their mother, the daughters rediscover their love for home and family. Brown weaves Shakespeare into almost every situation imaginable. You will be reminded and entertained at every turn by, not only tragedy, but wit and humor. The characters of this book are real and interesting; you will find yourself intrigued by their trials and discoveries. The Weird Sisters isn’t weird at all, just a good read whether you have sisters or not.
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Last Bus by Marsha Tennant
It was supposed to be 180 mornings but ended up being 360. I knew that before I changed gears, moved into AARP mode and began my next chapter, I would teach one more time. The joy that came my way was beyond my wildest dreams. The experience taught me much, and the memories are tucked in my heart for more stories to come. At 6 am for the last two years I have stood in the hall of the Horry County Education Center waiting for 100+ high school students to crawl off an early bus that brings them to us for nine weeks. Our window of time is short to work with these at-risk students before they return to their base school. I began my teaching career in a similar school in Portsmouth, Virginia, and felt the “call” to return as I ended the journey. When I asked Mr. McLaurin, the principal, if I could teach for him I had no idea the gifts that would come my way.
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Even on my most challenging day it was a good day. This little community of teachers that found their way to a quiet and simple building was always there for me as I readjusted my bearings and began my days in the classroom one more time. We brought our experiences from the places we have taught and lived. Being in this school was like a small church or southern town. One main hall connected our lives. The sense of community prevailed, and the village raised the child. I have learned so much about myself, and what is truly important. The challenges that some students faced put my life in perspective. If they could survive then so could I. Some taught me that less is more. “When my mama gets paid” was the bank account balance for many of them. Living in the moment was ok – that was where we were anyway. These students were my beacon for how to live my life more fully. Everyone that worked or taught at this school commented that it changed their lives. Community folks were in the building everyday to see how they could help. Any need was always addressed and someone made sure that it was taken care of. It was a positive place to be. I literally became happier everyday that passed. It elevated me to an incredible state of Grace. The time has come for my lifelong school year to end. I will follow my writing passion and travel with my husband of 42 years. I have had to give myself permission to do this. It has not been an easy decision. A child of the 60s always believes we should forever be changing the world. Each morning I have anxiously waited as students rub their sleepy eyes and walk toward the day that joined us for a few hours. We had become extended family for one other. Nine high schools converged in this special place. Each bus was announced as it arrived. And in the final moments – before the day began – I heard… “Last bus!”
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gets candid
Meet Dot Putignano – Goodness Behind the Scenes
Dot Putignano makes everyone she meets a part of her family and is loved by all who know her. The day we met, she greeted me at the door with a big smile and immediately offered me a cup of coffee. I instantly felt at home. Dot and her husband, Mike, are retired, and spend much of their days helping others. Their faith and their friendship bring joy to many in the community. Please tell me how you were led to be so involved in helping others. I was raised in the country, out on Hwy. 90, and my mother instilled compassion in me from an early age. She was always doing something for someone. I have a son and a daughter. My son lives on the property where I grew up, but my daughter has a developmental disorder and lives in a group home. Raising her was hard, but a blessing, and taught me a lot about love and compassion. Growing up, my daughter went to school, but when she was about to turn 21, I panicked. At that time, I was a single mother and had to work every day. What was I going to do if she didn’t have anywhere to go during the day? Back then there were no programs for handicapped adults; they mostly just stayed home and watched television. I started asking questions and knocking on doors and, after a long struggle and with a lot of help, we opened an adult developmental center in an old school building in Conway. I actually went door to door to find enough people to enable the center to get a grant. We had to have at least 21 people. They were out there, but no one knew!
I used to babysit for several local children that I fell in love with, but I broke my wrist and had to give them up. I do still enjoy the little ones at our church and am making a quilt for one now.
I became the first executive director of the center and even wrote the first grant. The community was so good to us. We had fundraisers every year – Mickey Mantle came two years in a row to help us! Today, this organization is known as the Horry County Disabilities and Special Needs.
For the past 20 years, I’ve been a volunteer with the Grand Strand Hospital Auxiliary, and I love my work there. I also have a lot of compassion for today’s military families. I was a military wife and moved around a lot, so I know how hard it can be to have your husband or wife so far away.
What are you involved in now? Oh my, Mike and I stay busy! My daughter comes home every other weekend, and we always have a good time together. Mike plays the trumpet, and we go to local nursing homes and play for the residents. Mike is also a Gideon, and I am in the auxiliary, so we distribute Bibles.
What do you do for fun? I try to spend as much time as I can with my son, daughter-in-law and grandchildren – I have three grandchildren and one great-grandchild. And, Mike and I have made a lot of “snowbird” friends that we spend time with when they are visiting our area. We enjoy trying new restaurants, and I love to play Mahjong, too. People are very important. We are on earth to reach out and make other’s lives better.
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I was ten years old when my mother asked me if I wanted to take a dance class. “Ballet?” I said. “Oh, no,” she replied. “That’s not good for your toes.” Instead, she entered me in a modern dance class. I was to learn much later that my teacher had trained under Martha Graham, the famous dance choreographer who Wikipedia describes as “the pioneer of modern dance – a new language of movement used to reveal the passion, the rage and the ecstasy common to human experience.” I could have cared less at that time that I was learning from such an expert, but without realizing it, I was being instilled with a passion and a lifelong love of body movement. Wearing leotards which revealed every bone and every muscle of the human body, we learned by sight and action how to transform our thoughts into graceful movement. And through balancing those body parts we began to appreciate what the human form can do. Control the muscles of the upper arm and let the hand relax and flow outward. Reach to the heavens and bow to the earth, It’s all about understanding the self in space. This preteen experience set me on a path to experience movement in all its forms. Playing high school basketball, biking and cheering for the boys’ teams was a continuance of this love of movement. And, in college I joined Orchesis, a modern dance group where I learned how to choreograph dances which I did each spring for the Senior Musical. That was an exciting experience to put movement into preset words and music and to take a singular love and share it with the cast of the play. Little Abner and Guys and Dolls – what fun it was – amateur college students working together to present a production of story, song and dance. Next, movement’s gravitational pull had me teaching aerobics – Jane Fonda and Jackie Sorenson to be exact. That form of exercise was based on dance, but we sure did a lot of stretching. And, in the summer, we moved our class to the pool for some water aerobics. Movement in water is more sustained but a little slower than on land because of H20 resistance. But, one beautiful sunny day my gals really moved fast. That was the day a snake decided to join us. We went flying out of that pool in no time flat! Tennis has many of the same ingredients as dance. You reach high for a demanding overhead, and you bend low for a sneaky drop shot. Your timing must be as exact as a pirouette. And, although running to the baseline for a lob might not be as graceful as a modern dance production, it’s still knowledge of the body in space, and how to make required actions. Then there is golf. How could I not play this activity when my husband is a golf pro? It’s a very demanding sport. It’s stop and go – not so reactive as tennis. There is more concentrated thought put into every movement. But balance and awareness of the body in space is important. How can you hit that perfect shot to the green if you are not settled with quiet moving parts? And having lyrical rhythm is a bonus. Each shot is like one complete dance step. Now as I look back on my life and realize what that long ago class produced, I am aware of a fantastic side product of dance and sports. I have never had to worry about my weight and my heart and lungs are in good shape. Had I not stayed active all my life, my health might be deteriorating now that I am close to my seventh decade. Yes, there’s some arthritis here and there and my feet aren’t what they used to be, but I’m not going to let that stop me. I was blessed to have started out on the right track, and I owe that to one person. Thank you, Mom.
Thank you, Mom
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Green Mountain State of Mind by Melissa Face
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I committed the southern girl’s ultimate sin. In fact, I probably couldn’t have done anything worse. I married a Yankee. I grew up in rural, southern Virginia. I spent Sunday afternoons on my grandparents’ farm riding bikes, making mud pies and collecting acorns. I shelled butter beans, snapped green beans and shucked corn. I embraced southern tradition; I was proud to be from the south. I met my husband, Craig, when he and I were working at Myrtle Beach International Airport. He told me he had been living in South Carolina for a little over a year, but was originally from Bennington, Vermont. “Vermont,” I thought. “Where the heck is that?” Like my father, I had only traveled through the southeastern states from Virginia to Florida. And I certainly hadn’t crossed the Mason-Dixon Line. “There’s nothing up there I need to see,” my dad joked. He was partly serious though. We had known each other about eight months when Craig took me to visit his hometown. In January, the Green Mountain state was anything but. The white, rolling hills were beautiful, but I was less than enchanted with the five-degree nights. I also didn’t like the fact that the waitresses had never heard of sweet tea. “Do you mean hot tea with sugar?” they asked. But Craig didn’t give up on me. He took me back to his state the following spring. Almost immediately, I fell in love with the fresh, New England air and rural, Vermont countryside. I stared at the red barns and the pastures of cattle as we drove to his father’s house. I felt at home. It was like Virginia but with rolling, green hills. A few years later, I married my Yankee. And surprisingly, my father approved. “He’s a nice guy,” my dad said. “So Vermont is kind of rural, huh?” We were married in Virginia at my family’s church. But our wedding was not without a bit of Vermont charm. Miniature bottles of maple syrup were our favors and many of Craig’s northern relatives were in attendance. Several of them even commented that our reception site reminded them of “back home.” Craig and I have been married almost seven years, and we travel to Vermont annually. When we visit, I have a very specific agenda that must be accomplished. I have to go to the Apple Barn where I buy a bottle of wine and an apple cider doughnut. I have to spend a day in Manchester, perusing the outlets and my favorite New England bookstore. And I must stop at the dairy farm that sells the best maple ice cream. No visit is complete without my own two scoops. I think Craig is happy living in Virginia. But I know a large part of him will always miss Vermont. His homesickness is most evident when he waves at strangers with Vermont license plates and purchases Cabot cheese, Green Mountain coffee and Ben and Jerry’s ice cream in very large quantities. But the longer I know Craig, the more I realize how similar our childhoods were. We were both raised in small towns by loving, hard-working parents. We both appreciate vegetables from the garden and winding, country roads. Like me, Craig grew up surrounded by fields and farmland; mine was just a bit flatter. I know now that the traditions I am proud of have less to do with being from the south and more to do with living in the country with people I love. I like the small town, slow paced life. And luckily, so does Craig. We will probably live in Virginia for a while, but moving north is not completely out of the question. I can picture Craig and me sitting on our deck and drinking coffee while we take in our backyard view of the Green Mountains. But I know that whether we are living in the north or the south, eating maple syrup or sharing a glass of sweet tea, we will be at home.
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www.sasee.com 19
Hair! by Sue Mayfield-Geiger
Several years ago, I stopped coloring my hair and let the gray finally have its way. It has become my badge of courage. Many of my friends yearn to do the same thing, yet they just can’t let go of the one thing that stops them – fear. Fear of looking old, fear of the time it takes for the gray to grow out, fear of being categorized. Going gray is not for the faint of heart and not for those who are not ready to try it. Yet, fear can prevent us from growing and becoming who we were meant to be. Many of my friends who just can’t seem to give up the “bottle” often say to me: “Well, your hair is a nice mixture of salt and pepper; mine would never do that because I have splotches of gray in strange places.” So did I. Others say: “I’ve tried going gray, but the gray is not the silvery color like yours – it’s more whitish.” So was mine. And then there’s: “I just don’t want to look old.” I didn’t either. But I took the plunge and went through the stages of more gray on one side than the other; dull gray and shiny gray mixed together; and short, curly gray hairs poking up from the top of my scalp like little corkscrews. But they all finally decided to get along. Most of my life, my hair was quite black. As I aged, the black got dark-brownish as the gray crept in. I used a drugstore product that just covered the gray for years until I finally starting doing a complete dye job. After menopause, however, I noticed my hair was thinning. Surely all those chemicals must have something to do with that? So, one day, I just stopped. I made a decision to see what would happen if I just stopped coloring my hair – cold turkey. The new hair that grew was a mixture of not only gray, but red, brown, black and white. Yuk! But, I stood my ground. As my hair grew longer, I got it trimmed, and by the time it was
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shoulder length, a lot of the unevenness had settled down. My patchwork quilt head was starting to look more like a zebra, but I didn’t mind because my hair was getting healthier – and thicker! Yes, my old mane was coming back to life again! No more hairs on my pillow every morning when I awoke and no more massive fallout in my hairbrush. Don’t be afraid of the color gray. It’s a natural phenomenon. For some reason, our culture bought into the myth that gray hair is a sign of aging, therefore, growing old must be bad. As a society, we’ve become obsessed with trying to look young – forever. It doesn’t always work. If the thought of gray hair means growing old to you, don’t despair. You are in very good company. According to research, by 2030, one in five Americans will be 65 or older. Thanks to improving longevity, there are now about six million Americans age 85 – twice as many as in 1990. Quite frankly, I’m not ready to throw in the towel, especially since many “seasoned” seniors I know are taking tango lessons, working out with personal trainers, going on hiking vacations and – gasp – finding companionship via on-line dating. One friend recently told me that she wants to move to Santa Fe, go make-up free and just wear moisturizer as she strolls through the Desert Mountains. Yet, her frosted blond hair tells me that she really doesn’t mean it. Aging has its stages. We go through them differently, I suppose. Would I like to have my jet black Ali McGraw, parted-in-the-middle “do” atop my head again? Only if it meant I could take back the collagen that has left my jaw line sagging. And since that is not about to happen, I can only say “thank you” every time a young twenty-something stops me on the street and says to me: “I love your hair!”
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Help us lend a helping hand. Donations of funds and non-perishable foods are greatly needed and appreciated.
Helping Hand of Myrtle Beach provides food, rental and utility assistance, local and long distance bus tickets, prescription medications, gasoline, diapers and personal items, and other individualized services. Last year, Helping Hand served over 20,000 walk in clients and their families, and provided food to over 30,000 people, and provided almost $200,000 in direct client assistance. Helping Hand of Myrtle Beach is a 501 (c) 3 agency supported by Horry County United Way, local foundations, churches, and private contributions, and is Myrtle Beach’s only full time food pantry.
Helping Hand of Myrtle Beach Elizabeth Chapin Patterson Community Assistance Center P.O. Box 2886, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina 29578 843-448-8451
Southern Snaps
A Bouquet of Mixed Blessings by Connie Barnard
In the summer of 2002, Sasee’s premiere issue featured Amy Ryals Steuer in the very first “Southern Snaps.” The article chronicled the story of Amy and her husband Rob’s decision to give up the security of steady employment and take the financial and emotional risk of opening their own business. Rob, who managed a local landscape firm, was ready to break away and become his own boss. For Amy, the decision was a complex one which involved more than merely giving up a secure position. The outstanding, dedicated young teacher at Carolina Forest Elementary School loved her job and had timed the birth of her first child for June to have the summer off before returning in the fall. However, the reality of a daily commute from Pawleys Island, concerns over daycare, and a deep desire to savor this new phase of her life caused Amy to seek the freedom of living on terms that had become increasingly important to her. In a scary but exciting leap of faith, Amy and Rob quit their jobs, started their own company, and gave up health insurance just as their first child was about to arrive. In her 2002 interview with Sasee, Amy shared the challenges and rewards of Indigo Landscaping and Construction’s first three years in operation. Their daughter, Emma, had just turned three, and her little sister, Ella, was just three weeks old. The couple had worked out a division of professional duties that utilized Amy’s degree in business management and marketing and Rob’s creativity and master’s degree in landscape architecture. Amy said, “I am linear. Doing books and payroll come naturally to me. Rob is the artistic one. Most of the time, it works out well.” The Steuers were willing and eager to take
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on the risks, responsibilities and opportunities inherent in the life they had chosen. For relaxation and fun, they also shared a love of music. On week-ends Amy would often join Rob when he played the mandolin with Sawgrass, a popular four-man Bluegrass and Newgrass band. The life they had worked hard to build provided a freedom and balance crucial to each of them. This spring, almost a decade later, Sasee sat down once again with Amy for a retrospective interview. Now the mother of daughters about to celebrate their twelfth and ninth birthdays, she is stronger, wiser and more beautiful than before. Despite significant personal and business-related challenges, Amy’s first words are: “I can’t believe I am this lucky.” As she talks about her life in these intervening years, Amy radiates a calm confidence that comes from wisdom and experience. The period following her first Sasee interview was a heady time for the Steuers and their fledgling company. Amy kept the books, handled the hiring and firing, and oversaw the day-to-day operations of the firm while Rob did the creative design and worked with clients. The Strand was booming, and new residential and commercial construction brought more opportunities than the firm could handle. As Indigo Landscaping thrived, Amy struggled to juggle her duties as a full-time mom and partner in the business. When Ella was 18 months old, Amy realized that something had to give. She hired bookkeepers for the company and concentrated more and more time and effort on her daughters, organizing play groups and volunteering at their pre-school. Five year old Emma had demonstrated an amazing intelligence and a natural talent for dance. Amy soon found herself taking Emma to dance lessons six days a week, while the jovial Ella thrived in her own artistic realm. Rob continued to play with Sawgrass, though over time it became more and more difficult for Amy and the girls to join him at the band’s performances which often lasted late into the night. Rob and Amy’s lives grew apart. Though connected through the business and the children, little time and space was left for the two as a couple, and the marriage collapsed. In the midst of Amy’s personal struggle, a crisis arose with the company as well. She discovered that somewhere in an extended succession of office assistants, Indigo’s books had been cooked. There were falsified loans, unpaid bills and evidence of mismanagement throughout. Amy found herself facing yet another set of challenges as she resumed hands-on management of Indigo’s business operations. In her typical positive style, however, instead of becoming embittered Amy says, “Just when I needed a job, my old job came back to me.” Then came the collapse of the building boom and the economic fallout associated with it. Amy and Rob worked together to trim all fat from the company, including a gluttony of inventory and labor, in order to make it as mean and lean as possible. Over time they became less reliant on sales and
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installation and turned their focus to residential and commercial landscape maintenance. On a positive side, the slowdown provided Rob more opportunities to concentrate on the aspects of landscape design he loves most, like Old English garden design, which includes arbors, walkways, and water features. Remarkably, despite the failure of their marriage, this is very much a success story. Amy refused to let it be otherwise. Working together, she and Rob have managed to bring the company through difficulties that might easily have destroyed it. As parents, they have also found a sense of balance. Amy says that Rob sees the children almost every day, and the four spend many hours together each week. “Over time I’ve learned to let things go. You can’t continue
to allow old wounds to get in the way of all that is good in life. Rob and I can really talk now. We communicate in ways we somehow weren’t able to before.” As difficult as the last years have been, Amy Steuer feels a sense of accomplishment that both she and the company have survived and endured. She says, “We used to laugh at our Depression era grandparents with their rubber band balls and stacks of used tin foil. Now I understand and admire that ability to hang tough.” She and Rob share a deep commitment to their daughters and the business they have worked so hard to build. “The good news,” she says, “is that we didn’t throw it all away. I don’t know how we figured all this out, but somehow we did.”
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Fighting Aging One Irritant at a Time by Ann Ipock
I’m fighting this aging thing pretty hard – oh, I know that sounds shallow, petty and ungrateful. It’s not that, I promise. Okay, maybe it’s a little shallow, but the truth is I want to feel good AND look good. I don’t see any reason why I can’t have both.
Yep, I’ve been through the menopausal, hot-flash curse, and boy, am I glad that’s behind me. Phew! As I sit here writing, I’m wearing black yoga pants and a long-sleeved tee shirt, and it’s 65 outside. I couldn’t have done that five years ago, so that’s one irritant that’s vanished. At the same time, I dread the days when it will hit 82 degrees, and I’ll be shivering in a heavy coat and wool socks, while my grown children are wearing shorts and tank tops. One plus: my vision is holding out pretty good. I couldn’t believe my ears (or eyes) when the optometrist declared I was one of those lucky people whose vision had stabilized, giving me a visual advantage. My near-sightedness shifted to slight far-sightedness and evidently my astigmatism improved on its own. Feeling elated, I questioned the woman at the highway patrol office on my license renewal. I begged her to lift the restriction, i.e., corrective lenses. She sniffed and snorted, doubting me, I could just tell. She whipped out an eye chart and drilled me. I read to line three, then stumbled, and I swear I saw an “I told you so” smirk coming from her. Because I love wearing sleeveless tops in the summer, I’m working my biceps and triceps (along with gluts, abs and rhomboids) like crazy, three times a week at the gym. I walk when I can – though it’s often to the pantry for some salted nuts or dark chocolate. But even that’s good for you in moderation, right? Sleep? Well, coming from someone who has always been a night owl, I’m seeing a pattern shift. I’m sleeping less, but possibly enjoying it more. I know from studying dental hygiene way back when, that as we age we require less sleep. But I ask you this: If I sleep less, do I have to work more? If so, I’m going back to bed. Like Nora Ephron, I also hate my neck. The dermatologist told me that’s the first thing to go. Go where, you might ask? It’s that saggy, baggy, turkey gobbler that gets to me. But wait! That’s not half as bad as the Howdy Doody jaw staring back at me in the mirror. My sister, Nancy, and I constantly compare ours. If you don’t know who Howdy Doody is, then Google it.
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Maybe you’re too young for ANY of this column to make sense, but just ask your mother, grandmother or great-grandmother. She’ll know. But, by far, my worst angst comes from my aches and pains. I’m talking elbows and knees, but lately, more upper back than anything. Though not daily, it’s worse when I’m hunched over the computer long hours. And lately, I’ve done that. Between column deadlines, web site updates, a temp medical transcribing job and, oh yes, Facebook! Oy! I swore I’d never get into that crazy social media. Helllllooooo? Here I am, a fan! It’s already like a full time job perusing my news feed daily, clicking “like” and/or making comments with my nearly 600 friends. How do those with 1200 friends – our daughter, Katie, for example – keep up? (Does this make Katie twice as popular as me?) I recently visited my parents and was mentioning my achy-breakyback to them. Dad seemed more concerned than usual. “Where is it?” he wanted to know. I asked him what he meant. “Exactly where is the pain?” Oh, this is scary, I thought. I’m the one that usually gives them medical, dental, psychological and social advice. Kidding! But I do suggest Tylenol for headaches and Melatonin for sleeplessness. But no, Dad walked right up to me, holding a bottle in his hand, praising his newfound miracle drug. Y’all, it was horse liniment! The actual name is Absorbine Veterinarian Liniment Gel. I am not kidding. I began to “neeeeeiiiigggh,” shaking my mane and clomping my horse hooves, but Dad explained that a good friend and nurse recommended he try some. “Smell it!” he said, removing the lid. It had a minty, medicinal scent. I was skeptical at first, but today I drove to my pharmacy and asked the clerk if they sell it. She turned to the pharmacist and said quite loudly, “Do we sell horse’s cinnamon?” By now, everyone was staring at me. My face turned ten shades of red. I felt light-headed, confused. Then the pharmacist mouthed something inaudible. But I just stuttered, “Th-th-thanks anyway,” and headed out the door, positive that my hearing was gone. After all, I’m getting older by the minute.
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Our multi-generational, extended family has solved the key to vacationing together – and more importantly, still liking each other. Who knew all it would take was one set of rules and an embarrassing wig.
Rules
to Fun Family Vacations by Janey Womeldorf
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As our family grew, the reality of our group vacations rarely matched the dream. For months beforehand, we would blissfully anticipate long, joyous days bubbling over with laughter and fun. More often than not, bickering and sulking drowned out the laughter, and rarely did the memories inspire the words of postcards. Successful group vacations start with three things: Matching expectations with reality, open communication and tolerant, considerate behavior. When people don’t know what is going on, feel left out, or are over-exposed to each other for longer-than-normal periods of time, criticism, bickering and whining sets in – a lesson we knew all too well. Our family now encompasses all ranges of ages and mobility levels, and we need a vacation that offers something for everybody – we found it in cruising. There were sixteen of us on our first cruise which meant the potential for personality conflict and family drama was ripe. To avoid this, we decided to implement some light-hearted guidelines to promote considerate, fun vacation behavior. We came up with eight rules which we unveiled at a pre-vacation, communication party shortly before the cruise. But how would we enforce them? On a previous Caribbean holiday, we had picked up a Jamaican-style wig as a souvenir – just looking at it made you laugh. Pea-sized, colorful beads secured the ends of long, dangly dreadlocks which hung from all sides of a black, crocheted cap. We named our dreadlocked cap, “Wiggy.” Adults feared it; children loved it, and anybody caught breaking the rules had to wear it. 1. He who whines wears Wiggy. Who knew that a simple no-whining rule could be so life and vacation changing? Many people are unaware how much they whine until they pay attention to it. The way it worked was that anybody overheard whining would be tattled on at the end of the day at our nightly, pre-dinner, family social. If there were multiple whiners, we would vote on the worst, and the culprit would have to wear Wiggy at dinner, or at the least, for the hour of our get-together. What constituted a whine included: I’m bored, I’ve eaten too much, (especially relevant on a cruise), any sentence that starts with “I hate,” complaints about the weather, I feel sick (unless validated by the presence of vomit), hangover whines (adults only), and basically any whiny or negative comment or criticism.
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2. Each person reserves the right to eat what they want, when they
want, where they want, and how much they want, without comment or critique by fellow family travelers. Any member caught commenting on another person’s eating habits shall wear Wiggy. Vacations are for relaxing and having fun, and eating plays a key part of that, especially on a cruise. People often comment on other people’s food intake because deep down, it makes them feel better about their own less-thanstellar eating habits. The hypocrisy is – who doesn’t indulge on vacation? 3. Not everybody has to do every thing together, all of the time. People need their own space, and so we agreed that every family should be free to do their own thing during the day. The reality is, similar interests meant that one was rarely alone, unless by choice. However, we also agreed to all meet at the same designated place, (usually a child-friendly bar), before dinner to chat about our day and cast our “Wiggy” votes. Not only did this provide a fun start to the evening, but everybody got to share in the group’s conversation – often difficult once the process of dinner starts. There would be no specific meet time – just an hour or so before dinner with heavy emphasis on the “or so.” That way, nobody felt rushed, nobody could be accused of being late, and everybody started the evening relaxed. 4. No counting calories. You’re on vacation. 5. No getting serious. You’re on vacation. 6. Volunteering for any activity that is fun or free is highly encouraged. 7. Stop worrying about what strangers think because “you’ll never see them again anyway.” The last rule? 8. Never forget rule number one. Not only was the cruise one of our most joyous, whine-free, memorable vacations ever, but Wiggy became a permanent fixture. We now even refer to ourselves as the Wiggy Group, have Wiggy newsletters, even a Wiggy salute. We have come a long way since the drama-filled trips we once called vacations. It isn’t that we are a challenging family, (okay maybe we are), but all things considered, I like to think we aren’t that different from yours. We have those who organize, and those who let them; we have those who smile, and those who whine; we have those who see the glass half-full and those for whom it is always empty; we have the lets-do-everything-together people, and the nolets-really-not. We are united by blood, divided by quirks, yet love each other dearly. The problem is, after a few days on vacation together, the presence of each other’s company causes our quirks to rise to the surface like enemy torpedoes and it is only a matter of time before we go to battle. Who knew that a set of rules and a fun wig could make so much difference? Our next group vacation is in December. Wiggy will be there just in case, but everybody behaves so well now that we’ve introduced a new set of rules to reward positive behavior. The person demonstrating the most selfless, kind, or considerate act of the day now gets rewarded with a Hawaiian lei adorned with a gold medal. We already know the upcoming vacation will be the stuff of postcards, but if it isn’t, at least nobody will be whining.
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www.sasee.com 27
Open Doors by Cathy MacKenzie
28 www.sasee.com
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They say when one door closes, another one opens. In my case, two doors opened simultaneously. Previously, I had thought I would be locked in turmoil forever because of a door that would not budge. Then that door flew wide open, along with another unexpected door. I thought it impossible to enter only one. My locked door was a lack of grandchildren. I had despaired of ever being called “Granny.” In an instant, it seemed, life changed dramatically for me. Today I have three biological grandchildren and one step-grandchild. My fulfilled wish made me the happiest woman in the world. But that fulfillment brought on a new set of problems – nothing as serious as death or illness or bankruptcy – but a dilemma nonetheless… The winter of 2006/2007, before my two granddaughters were born, my husband and I spent three months in a little village in Mexico, the longest vacation we had ever taken. Both of us fell so in love with the area that he suggested we purchase a house and spend winters there. I was in turmoil. Finally, grandchildren were in the future. Being away from them, even for the winter months, was not what I had envisioned. I expected to always live near my children, and I wanted to be near my future grandchildren, too. I wanted to be there for their parents in times of emergency, to be available to pick them up at daycare or school, to watch over them when they were sick. I enjoyed it when my children dropped in for unannounced visits, and I anticipated more of the same with grandchildren. That prospective new door in Mexico could open rare opportunities and experiences, not to mention warm winters, which was something that previously I could never fathom. My husband is not my children’s father, so my family isn’t as important to him, and I knew I wouldn’t be fair denying him time down south. I felt like I was sinking in a quagmire. I didn’t know how I could endure being away from those
little beings for four to six months every year. I was torn – extremely torn. We bought a house that first year. It was a beautiful Mexican home smack in the middle of that little Mexican village. When we returned to Canada, my mother was aghast. My children laid on the guilt trip. Only my husband was ecstatic. I suffered silently, sinking lower and lower. December rolled around too soon that year, and then it was time for our first full winter in our new home in Mexico. My two gorgeous granddaughters, born three weeks apart, were just four months old. I was in tears, knowing how much of their early lives I would miss during a four-month absence. It’s now been five years since we’ve become snowbirds. Thus far, we’ve spent four months away each year, but it will eventually increase to six months. Our Mexican village is so enchanting and the weather so perfect, I find it hard to be miserable. I become involved in so many activities, that sometimes I forget my grandchildren for a few days. I can see and talk to them on Skype, but it isn’t the same as cradling and cooing to an eight-month-old baby boy, having two three-and-a-half-year-old girls tug on my arm to play or a ten-year-old asking me to help her write a story. We have many friends who live in Mexico permanently. I am so envious of them, yet I am confused. How do they manage to give up their daily lives with their families? How do they survive without day-to-day touches with their grandchildren? While in Mexico, I very rarely think of our home in Canada. When I do, I almost become claustrophobic as I remember rooms filled to the brim with furniture and clutter. It is a large, modern three-bedroom bungalow with a finished basement, approximately forty-four hundred square feet. I love that house and wouldn’t trade it for another. When I’m home in Canada, busy with my other life, I very rarely think of our Mexican home. In Mexico, life is so much simpler. Our two-story home there is large as well, almost four thousand square feet, with two bedrooms, plus a one-bedroom casita behind the main house. Our sparse furniture is Mexican-style, rustic and laid back. We are freer, with less stress, less baggage, less commitment. Walking down the cobblestoned streets gives me a feeling of being in the middle of a Norman Rockwell painting. The sun always shines. Street noises abound – blaring loudspeakers, foreign voices, roosters’ cock-a-doodle-doos. Women sweep the dusty sidewalks in front of their homes, and men are busy working in their shops. Before and after school, children play outdoors, very rarely fighting or crying. Well-behaved teenagers congregate on the street corners. Older Mexicans sit on squatty stumps of wood as they watch life pass by; others saunter down the streets, all freely sharing their smiles and buenos dias. When it comes time to lock the door on our Mexican home, I become depressed, although I know another very different home waits to be unlocked. I want so badly to see my grandchildren, yet I don’t want to leave my idyllic life in Mexico. This is my home, as well; this is where I am happy when I’m here, even though I miss my family terribly. Sometimes I wonder if I hadn’t prayed so often and fervently for grandchildren, would they be here today? If I had no grandchildren, would I have permanently locked that door in Canada and forever spread wide that Mexican door? I will never know. For now, I will continue to fly from country to country, one home to the other. When my grandchildren are older – when they are teenagers and too wrapped up in their own worlds to care about an aged grandmother – perhaps then I will chose. Both doors may be locked at any given time, but both are so easily opened.
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www.sasee.com 29
How Water Saved Me From Drowning by Susan DeBow
Let’s just say on the weight scene that at my highest, I scored higher than a perfect bowling game. About a strike in the tenth frame and seven pins higher. I can say it this way, but I can’t say the number. It gets stuck in my throat. Big bones? Not particularly. Just a load full of fat and flab on a sixfoot frame, at least while standing on my right leg. Standing on my left leg I was only five-ten plus something. The six-foot frame gave the fat a decent area to spread across, but to make that perfect bowling game weight acceptable, I really should have been, maybe, ten feet tall? Over a decade ago, while in a writing workshop, the instructor, who had asked me to take the class for a second year because he thought I was a good writer, chastised me after reading a piece I wrote to the group. Of course, I had made the class laugh in the piece. It was about being big and going shopping and passing the petite section, the junior’s and women’s sections to find the Plus Size section that was seemingly hidden in the farthest corner of the store. I filled the piece with laughs and a wink of pathos, my stock and trade as a columnist for the local paper. But instead of getting kudos for the piece, which was decent, the instructor, a little man, of perhaps, five foot nine, who weighed less than a good bowling score, said something about how I skirted the issue of weight, and the piece was less because of that. I didn’t say much or offer much of a rebuttal. The class “tisk-tisked”
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his comments. Several of them knew from whence my sentiments came. Besides, I wasn’t quite the novice writer I had been a year ago, and I knew what approach my readers liked. My style was to make difficult subjects more palatable by using humor to ease the bitter pills of life. As I said, that was over a decade ago. For close to fifteen years, I continued to keep parts of my life at the surface level, masking pain with laughter, equalizing hope with cynicism, eating insecurities, fear and emotional distress with great dollops of whipped cream and pints of coleslaw. (Yes, coleslaw is fattening, at least when you eat a cabbage full.) I have written about cancer, suicide, alcoholism and losing my parents in depth. But with weight, I have only scratched the epidermal layer. Why? Because while many things in society have lost their stigma, being obese has not. If anything, the stigma has become worse. The obese are the ignorant, undisciplined, weak, scourge of the earth. We are responsible for increasing health care costs. We smell. We take up too much space in airplane seats. We break chairs. We make others laugh so they laugh with us and not at us. Yes, this has been my secret life. It has made me hide. And, at times, made me feel like, at 58, life was going to be a downhill slide. That my next occupation would be Couch Potato. Loaded Couch Potato.
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My husband (Nick) and I traipsed down to the city next door’s community center and asked for a tour of the Senior Center. This, I thought, was where I would hang out the rest of my life…playing canasta, doing exercises while seated and bringing a covered dish to the Wednesday noon buffet. An older gentleman led us on a tour of the facility, which was adjacent to the community pool, workout center and walking track. I had a difficult time getting around because I had recently had my arthritic hip replaced. I wasn’t sure what had happened, but I wasn’t walking as well after the surgery as I had hoped. Nick and I asked questions about the senior center and asked about the swimming privileges. The senior membership entitled you to swim between 11 am to noon each day, and you could walk on the track during limited hours also. The tour guide showed us the pool, complete with lazy river. I immediately remembered how much I used to love to be in the water. When I was young, I’d spend hours and hours in the family pool, amusing myself doing different strokes, swimming the length of the pool underwater, performing back dolphins, doing flips off the diving board and treading water. Nick knew this. He knew I had loved water. We had had many discussions about how my happiest times while growing up were when I was in the water. We debated whether to just join the senior center for a nominal amount, pay for a regular membership, where I could use more of the facilities, or get the premiere membership, which not only included all of the facilities, but extended hours. We bought the premiere. The next day I got off the couch, out of the recliner and out the door. I put on my two piece skirtini swimming suit, the kind with the big skirt that I hoped would give the illusion that a tiny person was hiding inside. Grabbed a big beach towel and with fear and self-consciousness hobbled to the pool. I figured I would swim a bit and then go to the senior center. I took my new lock, one like I used to have on my high school locker, shoved my clothes in the locker and took a deep breath. I sat on the bench in the women’s locker room, seeing other women walk by, all shapes and sizes. I had the dark thoughts of a fat person. What right do I have to walk out in public with a leg that looked like yogurt mixed with granola? Why did I hate myself so much that I allowed myself to get like this? Have I gone so far into the abyss that I can never come back to the land of the living? The fit? The excited? Tears welled in my eyes. Maybe I should just get dressed and hobble to the senior center and sit and talk to people and fake like life was just hunky-dory. But something inside me wouldn’t let me do that. I grabbed my shark beach towel, wrapped it around my lower half, and walked out the door and into the pool area. Thankfully, there were only a few other swimmers. I dropped my towel on the bench, feeling as naked and as exposed as I had ever felt. God, I thought, I would rather be spread-eagled in stirrups at the gynecologist. I would have felt less exposed and judged. The zero-entry pool was just steps away from where I left my towel. Step-by-step, I inched my way into the pool. I dared not look around to see if I was being stared at and “tisk-tisked.” With each step I got a bit deeper into the water. It was up to my waist when I turned myself around and lowered myself into the soothing liquid. I leaned my head back and floated on my back. Oh, by the grace of God, I thought, I am home. And it was then, I realized, the water was going to save me from drowning.
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The Dream House with the Babbling Brook by Felice Prager With our first home, my husband, Sam, and I could not figure out why it had been on the market as long as it had been. We fell in love with it immediately. It was a little red ranch house with an apple tree in the front yard on a cul-de-sac with over forty trees and a little babbling brook trickling along the west border of the property. It needed a little cleaning up, we thought, some cosmetics, but other than that, we believed it was a great starter house. If you ask Sam, he will tell you that when he first saw the house, he was a bit skeptical, but he did not want to disappoint me. According to Sam’s rendition, I fell in love with the little red ranch house with an apple tree in the front yard on a cul-de-sac with over forty trees and a little babbling brook trickling along the west border of the property. It was MY dream house. I was the one who loved the little babbling brook. I was the one who wanted to watch our children shimmy up the apple tree. Sam will tell you that he had his doubts from the beginning and will never mention the tree house he dreamed of building with multiple floors and sliding glass doors for our yetto-be-born children. The truth was that our dream house turned out to be a very high maintenance home. The forty trees had forty trees full of leaves that we had to rake and bag, forty trees full of acorns, pinecones and other assorted goodies that we had to clean up, forty trees worth of bird droppings and wildlife habitats, and there was poison ivy climbing up every one of the forty trees and bushes on our property. The lovely cul-de-sac was also not on the maps used by the men driving the snowplows during snowstorms, so we were forced to dig ourselves out of our little dream home every time there was a snowstorm. That was just the outside of the house. Once we took occupancy, we realized our little red ranch house with an apple tree in the front yard on a cul-de-sac with over forty trees and a little babbling brook trickling along the west border of the property required a top-
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to-bottom overhaul on the inside. What did we know? It was our first house. We did not even know the right questions to ask. The owners, who had lived in the house for forty years and seemed to be a sweet old couple, never fixed problems. They just covered them up. And they were not very good coveruppers. When there was a cigarette burn in the linoleum, they bought a throw rug. When there was a hole in a wall, they covered it with a picture. After we removed forty years worth of layered wallpaper and paint, we realized these owners covered outlets they did not use by stuffing them with newspaper and wallpapering over them without closing off any electrical circuits. The fact that a fire never occurred was a miracle. However, we were first-time homeowners, and we were optimistic. In my rendition of our first home story, Sam had these problems all worked out. Sam was going to remodel the basement so we could buy a pool table and have a place for parties. Not that we were party people, but Sam wanted a place for parties in case we ever developed a need to entertain. Sam was also going to turn the attic into a second floor so our children would have their own bedrooms, and I could have an office. Finally, Sam was going to break out the living room and dining room walls to build a deck overlooking the pretty babbling brook on the west side of our property. As the new co-owner of the little red ranch house with an apple tree in the front yard on a cul-de-sac with over forty trees and a little babbling brook trickling along the west border of the property, I liked his ideas. The real truth occurred to us when Sam took our dog, Tiffany, for a middle-of-the-night walk during the first significant rainstorm, which occurred within hours of us moving in. Tiffany always had an uncanny way of needing to go for a walk at all hours of the night. This time, her dog-intuition was telling her an important message, which Sam realized the minute he stuck his foot out the front door into four feet of water.
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The little babbling brook that trickled along the west side of our property that I had fallen in love with swelled during rainstorms. It swelled across our driveway all the way to the street and right up to our front door. It swelled to the point where it was a raging river, and our house stood in the middle of it. Our dream castle had a raging moat around it, and there was no drawbridge. Sam, my knight in shining armor, was as baffled as I was as he stood in the doorway not knowing what to do next. After the first rainstorm, we quickly got to know our new neighbors who explained this phenomenon to us. Apparently, each neighbor had also fallen prey to similar home sellers. It had something to do with a high water table and the Army Corps of Engineers who moved the babbling brook fifteen years earlier in order to build our small community and a mall a mile away. The bottom line was scientific: water will always find its way back to its original course. In other words, parting the seas and moving a river are jobs not left to mere mortals. In other words, we were in deep, deep, deep water. However, we had no way of knowing this. It was sunny on the day when we found our first dream home. It was sunny on the day the house inspector did his job. No matter how wet the basement got, the house always remained standing firm when the waters found their way back to the babbling brook. The original owners felt that the flooding was only a minor inconvenience to them and did not feel any overwhelming desire to share the information with us. To quote them, “It only got that bad a few times a year.” They were not actually hiding anything by painting over the water line in the basement; they were simply giving us that fresh paint look. According to them, when we threatened to sue them for hiding this pertinent information, one of their sons was a circuit court judge. As with many other first time homeowners, we learned many other lessons. We learned that sump pumps never work during a black out, and every time there was a rainstorm, we lost our electric power. We learned that French drains sound exotic and intriguing, but they are merely holes in the ground that overflow when the water table is higher than the exotic, intriguing French drains – and the wetness attracts insects. We learned that no matter how much you try to improve a home, it still might be sitting in the middle of the Colorado River during a rainstorm. We also learned that you cannot bail out a house. Thus, we learned the most important lesson: when sitting in the middle of a raging river, stay in the boat until you see dry land, then jump to safety! That was our plan. We actually got quite lucky even before we could contact a realtor to put our little red ranch house with an apple tree in the front yard on a cul-desac with over forty trees and a little babbling brook trickling along the west border of the property on the market. As we were removing debris from our front lawn that was left by the previous rainstorm, a young developer approached us and asked if we wanted to sell our house for much more than we had paid for it. When we asked him if he wanted to walk inside, he shook his head and said he was going to knock it down to build condominiums. All the neighbors in the cul-de-sac got the same offer, and they all took the money and ran. We joined the run-a-thon and never looked back. Apparently, not one of the neighbors mentioned the words babbling brook, Army Corps of Engineers or water table during the transactions. In fact, when the young developer told us there would be a financial bonus if we could be out in thirty days, we asked him if he would raise the bonus if we were out by the weekend.
www.sasee.com 33
Adele Richardson & Dawn Richardson
“Jewelry is in my blood,” laughed Dawn Richardson when I asked her why she came to work with her mom. “I’ve been coming to work here since before I could see over the counter!” Dawn’s mom, Adele Richardson and her husband, Grady, started Grady’s Jewelers more than 40 years ago in historic Conway and have a devoted clientele who know they’ll be treated like family. “My mother is such a sweet person,” said Dawn. “She taught me to live and work by the Golden Rule, and I admire her so much.” Dawn went on to say that Adele is always on the move and rarely slows down, even on her infrequent days off. “Mom is my best friend.” On Mother’s Day, the family will gather at Adele’s house after church for a potluck dinner and fellowship. All the grandchildren are nearly grown, but Dawn’s Yorkie, Max, will be in definitely be in attendance. Max has become the favorite “granddog” and comes to work with Dawn every day, ruling the roost.
Grady’s Jewelers 317 Laurel Street Conway
843-248-2624
www.gradysjewelers.com
Brenda Urquhart & Nicole Singleton The Little White Dress 5001 North Kings Highway Myrtle Beach
843-449-4940
www.thelittlewhitedress.net
“My sister and I both got engaged within months of each other, and there were no bridal boutiques in the Myrtle Beach area,” remembers Nichole Singleton when asked about working with her mom, Brenda Urquhart. “It had always been my mom’s dream to work in the bridal/fashion industry, and this gave us the perfect opportunity to open The Little White Dress. It’s wonderful to work with such an amazing business woman and nice to work as a mother/daughter team because the majority of our clients are mothers/daughters as well!” Nichole told me that family extends past just her mom and the rest of the family. “We would do anything for each other and feel the same about our customers and employees. We want everyone to feel as if they are a part of The Little White Dress family!” Brenda gets to decide how the family celebrates Mother’s Day. Usually the family goes out for brunch, but some years all Brenda wants is to lounge by the pool and relax all day.
Pat Bates & Page Nash
Page Nash started working with her mom, Pat Bates, right out of college. In 1994, she moved back to the area from Charleston and needed a job. Pat had been doing interior design from home, but when Rose Arbor went on the market the two women decided to go for it. When I asked Page what was the best thing about working together, she didn’t hesitate. “I can always trust her. Mom is my best friend,” Page continued. “I don’t have to explain what I’m thinking to her.” Page told me that while they are both very traditional, they are also able to bounce different ideas off of each other. “That’s why we have so many different fabrics,” she laughed. Pat’s positive, happy attitude toward life has shaped the way she and Page run their business and every client receives the benefit. The family will spend Mother’s Day together. “We usually go out to dinner and, if the weather is nice we’ll go on a boat ride. I don’t know what I’d do without Mom.”
Sarah Kerchner
Rose Arbor Fabrics
6916 North Kings Highway Myrtle Beach
843-449-7673
www.rosearborfabrics.com
BUSINESS Eleanor Pitts & LeAnne Daniels
When I asked LeAnne Daniels when she started working with her mom, she laughed and said, “When have I not worked with her!” Eleanor Pitts opened her first store in Kingstree when LeAnne was ten years old, and she remembers spending her after school hours making bows and wrapping gifts. “I always loved being in the store with my mom.” After Eleanor moved to Pawleys Island and opened her Oak Lea store, LeAnne, a pharmacist by trade, made the decision to move here and go to work with her mom. “This is a fun, happy business—I love it,” LeAnne said. “It’s good to work with my mom. We like the same things and have the same tastes. Now my children come here after school and, my daughter wraps packages and makes bows, just like I did growing up. She asked me if she could work with me when she grew up.” “On Mother’s Day we’ll all gather at Mom’s house after church for a big meal and time together. It’s all about family—at work and at home.”
Eleanor Pitts Fine Gifts & Jewelry 11096 Ocean Highway Pawleys Island
843-237-8080
www.eleanorpitts.com
Trudy Gauer & Tracy Haugh Taylor’s
11412 Ocean Highway Pawleys Island
843-237-9500
“Mom and I had talked about opening a business together for a while, and three years ago we finally did it—naming it after my daughter. I can’t think of a better person to work with than my mom, who’s also my best friend,” said Tracy Haugh about working with her mom, Trudy Gauer. “It’s totally different from working for anyone else. I know there is business to take care of, but our relationship makes it so much fun!” Tracy told me that she and her mom each have their own areas of expertise—and Trudy’s is interacting with customers. “All of our customers love my mom and ask for her when they come in Taylor’s. It’s amazing to watch her and see all of the friends she has made through our business.” On Mother’s Day the family goes to church and then out for lunch. The rest of day is open for some much needed R & R. “My mom is beautiful inside and out. I’m very blessed to have her in my life.”
Sharon Davis & Sandy Sheely
“The biggest reason I started working with my mom is because I admire her,” said Sandy Sheely when asked about her mom, Sharon Davis. “She’s amazing! And, she runs her business just like the rest of her life—always happy and positive.” Sandy told me her mom is her inspiration. “I’ve learned so much about how to be a good businesswoman from her—how you treat people is what you get back in life.” Even after 31 years in business, Sharon has not lost her enthusiasm. When she’s not working, she’s involved with her church and her beloved gardening. Sandy asked her mom why she spent so much time helping others and Sharon told her, “Isn’t that why we’re here? Isn’t helping others the joy in life?” Mother’s Day is a huge celebration at Sharon’s house with a potluck dinner and, if the weather’s nice, this adoring grandmother sets up a huge blowup slide for the children. “Every family has a ‘go-to’ person— in our family it’s Mom; she’s my best girlfriend.”
Shades & Draperies 4905 Hwy. 17 South Bypass Murrells Inlet
843-651-8177
www.ShadesandDraperies.com
A Mother’s Legacy
You Are Never Too Old to Dance! “Shake a Leg” with the Rock’N’Ettes, a senior dance group sponsored by the Grand Strand Senior Center. This “chorus line” was formed ten years ago by sixteen women who share a love of dancing, and the group performs about 50 shows a year from Georgetown to Shallotte, N.C. On Monday, May 16, at 11:30 am, there will be an orientation at the Grand Strand Senior Center, 1268 21st Ave. N., in Myrtle Beach for prospective new members. All women over 50 with some dance experience are encouraged to attend. Come and have fun, make new friends and entertain others. Call Gail McPherson at 843-650-1300 or Nancy Sook at 843-497-4094 for additional information.
Brooke Taylor never planned to work in retail. Her mom, Linda Hope Taylor, opened Hope Taylor & Company in 2002, after retiring from the hotel business. Tragically, Linda became ill with ALS in 2006. “My mom was my best friend,” says Brooke. “I knew I had to help her like she had helped so many others through the years.” Brooke took over the management of Hope Taylor & Company and, with her husband and 3 month old baby, moved in with her parents to help care for her mom. She never regretted this special time they had together, and mother and daughter were able to share lots of love and laughter before Linda lost her fight in August of 2008. Brooke’s strength and ability to carry on was tested again seven months later when she lost her dad. Brooke told me that her mom is with her every day. “She guides me in all of my decisions. I couldn’t do it without her.” Today, Brooke loves her work and feels very strongly about treating her customers the way her mom taught her—like family. “Mom went above and beyond for everyone that walked into the store. She had a huge heart and will always live on in mine.”
Give Your Mom, Sister, Best Friend or Yourself the Gift that Lasts a Year!
“She guides me in all of my decisions. I couldn’t do it without her.”
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Stop by and say hello to Brooke at 312 Main St. in North Myrtle Beach or call 843-281-9650.
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LILY SHOULD NEVER HAVE TO FACE
A LILY LIFE WITHOUT SHOULD NEVER HAVEVISION TO FACE A LIFE WITHOUT VISION
Lily was born blind. She has a retinal disease called Leber congenital amaurosis. There is currently no cure, but there is hope. The Foundation Fighting Blindness Lily was born blind. She has a retinal disease called Leber congenital amaurosis. is funding critical research for treatments and cures that will one day restore There is currently no cure, but there is hope. The Foundation Fighting Blindness Lily’s sight and the sight of millions more around the world. is funding critical research for treatments and cures that will one day restore Lily’s sight and the sight of millions more around the world.
A CURE IS IN SIGHT. A CURE IS IN SIGHT.
You can help. To learn more and for free retinal disease information, call 800-683-5555 or visit FightBlindness.org. You can help. To learn more and for free retinal disease information, call 800-683-5555 or visit FightBlindness.org.
Faves
A few things our staff loves right now Whether for business or pleasure, these days travel conjures up images of crowded planes, endless lines, intrusive security checks, and cruise ship chaos. Getting there is no longer half the fun. So, our staff searched local shops to find a few items we think might make the journey to your destination a little easier, fun, and maybe even more fashionable.
Don’t let this beautiful bag fool you- it’s just as functional as it is pretty. The hidden adjustable handle and barely noticeable wheels make carrying your vacation shopping finds or a laptop and work items a snap.
Find it at Bijuju, Barefoot Landing or Broadway at the Beach locations Celia, Senior Account Executive
This travel bed for infants and children is so compact, it’s hard to believe it pops up into such a comfortable, safe resting place. Perfect for impromptu trips or long layovers, the PeaPod helps little ones snooze through in comfort.
Find it at Kangaroo Pouch, Myrtle Beach Erica, Account Executive
You can only check the forecast before you board the plane and hope for the best. Umbrellas can be hard to carry everywhere, but this raincoat/purse combo is perfect for the unexpected shower. Find it at Palm Shoes & Collections, Pawleys Island Susan, Director of Sales and Marketing
Read your ebooks in style with these Spartina Nook, Kindle and iPad covers. Choose from a gorgeous collection of patterns, and the linen and leather construction is as durable as it is beautiful.
Find it at Hope Taylor & Company, North Myrtle Beach and Sassy Girl, Conway Kim, Account Executive
Adorn your luggage with these cute luggage tags to spot your bags from the far end of the turnstile.
That quirky hotel with lots of character in some far flung destination might carry a musty smell from years of travelers. This Voluspa travel candle is just the antidote.
Find it at Francesca’s, Barefoot Landing Amanda, Account Executive
Find it at Francesca’s, Barefoot Landing Leslie, Editor
Not just your ordinary jewelry roll, this case keeps your baubles and bling safe and in place. It is so easy to pack and makes it easy to transport everything from place to place or just back to home sweet home. Find it at Studio 77, Myrtle Beach Delores, Publisher
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Annual Waccamaw Arts & Crafts Guild Juried Exhibition, The Art Museum at Myrtle Beach, 3100 S. Ocean Blvd.. For more info, call 843-235-2510.
Rivertown Music and Arts Festival, 10 am-9 pm, Conway. For more info, call 843-248-6260.
Blue Crab Festival, 9 am-6 pm, Little River. For more info, call 843-249-6604.
Waterway Artists Association Art Show, 11:30 am-6:30 pm, Shallotte Sunnyside Historic School, Rt. 179, Shallotte, N.C., free. For more info, call 910-575-0403.
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Moveable Feast, Mary Alice Monroe discusses Butterfly’s Summer, 11 am, Pawleys Plantation, $25. For more info, call 843-235-9600 or visit www.classatpawleys.com.
Coastal Uncorked Food & Wine Festival. For more info, visit www.coastaluncorked.com.
Long Bay Symphony Youth Orchestra Spring Concert, 7 pm, Holy Cross Church, Pawleys Island. For more info, call 843-237-3035.
Ocean Isle Concert Series, 6:30 pm-8 pm, Museum of Coastal Carolina parking lot, E. Second St., Ocean Isle Beach, N.C. For more info, call 910-579-2166.
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Visit www.sasee.com for a full calendar and more Sasee events!
Annual Blessing of the Inlet, Belin UMC, Murrells Inlet, 9 am-4 pm. For more info, call 843-651-7979.
Bluegrass on the Waccamaw, 1-11 pm, under the Main Street Bridge in Conway. For more info, call 843-248-5399.
Cruise Through the Caribbean Gala, presented by GMH Women’s Board, 7-11 pm, Precious Blood Life Center, Pawleys Island, $100 per person includes food and drink from the various “ports of call.” Guests are asked to dress in “cruise wear.” For more info, call 843-651-6942.
Garden Tour & Taste, 10 am-1 pm, Carolina Shores Golf and Residential Community, The Village at Calabash and The Farm at Brunswick. For more info, call 910-579-1057.
The Perfect Gift for Mothers & Grandmas
• Childrens Birthstones • Designer Handbags and Sunglasses now available • Jewelry repair done on premises • Custom Creations – one of a kind
This National Historic Landmark is home to the only Association of Zoos and Aquariums accredited zoo on the coast in the Carolinas, and one of the most significant sculpture collections in the world! From overland excursions on the Trekker to garden tours and new exhibits, there is always something new and exciting at Brookgreen. For more information call or visit our website
(800) 849-1931 www.brookgreen.org
Admission: $12 Adults, $10 Seniors, $6 Children 4-12 & Children under 3 are FREE!
Butterfly Exhibit Opens Spring 2011
Inlet Square Mall • 10125 Hwy. 17 Bypass S. • Murrells Inlet, SC 29576 www.ninajewelryboutique.com • 843-299-0340
15% Off all Nina beads 10% Off all bracelets
Admission is Good for 7 Days! On Highway 17 south of Myrtle Beach between Murrells Inlet and Pawleys Island.
Advertiser Index
131 Digital . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 Abrams Department Store . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 All Beauty Cosmetics, Inc . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42 Art Mosaics of the Carolinas, LCC . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 Barbara’s Fine Gifts . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19 Brookgreen Gardens . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 Carmen Carmen Salon . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 Celebration Music Theatre . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 Christopher’s Fine Jewelry . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10 Coastal Uncorked . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43 David E. Grabeman, D.D.S., P.A. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 East Coast Coatings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31
Eleanor Pitts Fine Gifts & Jewelry . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 Finders Keepers Consignment & Boutique . . . . . 25 Grand Strand Primary . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19 Hannah Bs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33 Homespun Crafters Mall . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42 Island Floors & Rugs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19 The Kangaroo Pouch . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25 Lee’s Inlet Apothecary . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 Litchfield Dance Arts Academy . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25 Long Bay Symphony . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42 Maguire Law Firm . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 McLeod Health . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3
Miller-Motte Myrtle Beach . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10 Nina Jewelry Boutique . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 Palmetto Ace Home Center . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 Palmetto Paint & Design Center . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 Pawleys Island Bakery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25 Pawleys Lifestyles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 Pawleys Island Realty . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 Pawleys Island Swimwear . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 Pee Dee Orthopaedic Associates, PA . . . . . . . . . . . . 7 Pure Compounding . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 Redken Myrtle Beach Show . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 Rose Arbor Fabrics . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7
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Sassyfras . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19 Sculpted Figures . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44 Shades & Draperies . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 Stephanie’s Salon & Day Spa Services . . . . . . . . . 33 Strand Styling Studio . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31 Sunset River Marketplace . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27 Take 2 Resale . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 Taylor’s Boutique . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 Taz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 Treasures Jewelers . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27 WEZV . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42
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Come shop our line of affordable fabrics
All Beauty Cosmetics Inc. is offering a part time opportunity where you can earn extra income on your own flexible schedule plus benefits that take only a little of your time. Requirements • Should be computer literate. • 1-2 hours access to the internet weekly. • Must be efficient and dedicated. Contact us with your resume for more details and job information: eheatherallbeautycos@gmail.com Hurry…don’t wait! This great opportunity is limited so contact All Beauty Cosmetics Inc. today! The Long Bay Symphony Guild presents:
Fiddler on the Green Golf Classic Arrowhead Country Club, June 25th, 2011
Antiques • Collectibles • Unique Handmade Crafts • Glassware Wood Products • Country Decor • Floral Arrangements • Handbags WoodWick Candles • Vintage Items • Jewelry • Fabrics & Sewing Notions
www.homespuncrafters.com
843-238-3622
11:00 am Registration/Lunch 12:45pm Shotgun Start $65.00/person • $240 / foursome • Raffle • Auction • Contests • Refreshments • Prizes • Hole in One wins Cruise for Two • Gold Blast (including Mulligans and more) • Closest to the pin • and…Much, Much More! Proceeds to benefit the Long Bay Symphony and the Toby Evans Scholarship Fund
114-A Hwy. 17 N. • Surfside Shopping Center • Surfside Beach, SC 29575 Monday - Friday 9 am to 6 pm • Saturday 10 am to 5 pm • Sunday 1 pm to 5 pm
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Call 843.448.8379 for more information and to register
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2ND ANNUAL COASTAL UNCORKED FOOD AND WINE FESTIVAL, FEATURING PAULA DEEN! Coastal Uncorked is the area’s premier food, wine and spirits festival This year’s event builds on the amazing 2010 inaugural festival
MAY 12 | GOLF TOURNAMENT
This Year’s Coastal Uncorked Golf Tournament will be held at championship courses and include local chefs and wine representatives at multiple holes with tasting samples, beer and spirits tastings.
MAY 13-14 | TASTING TROLLEYS
Tasting Trolleys will take guests around 10 premiere stops. Themed locations feature wine, beer and spirits tastings, cooking demonstrations and live music. Also this year: • Market Common Wine Tasting Tent & Gourmet Village in Valor Park • Coastal Untapped in Plyler Park along Ocean Boulevard
MAY 14 | PAULA DEEN COOKING DEMONSTRATION
Paula Deen signature main event includes a meet & greet, VIP book signing and cooking demonstration at The Alabama Theatre.
MAY 8-15 | RESTAURANT WEEK Featuring local restaurants offering special menus that complement the spirit of festival. Events include: • Three-Course Pre-fixed $20.11 Tasting Menu • Wine Dinners • Beer Dinners • Coastal Casuals
MAY 15 | FOOD CHALLENGE AND FINALE
Coastal Uncorked Food Challenge & Finale Event, with celebrity judges, Matt Lee and Ted Lee. This event highlights seven local chefs in a live “Iron-Chef”-style cooking competition, also featuring food, beer, wine and spirits tasting stations from participating restaurants and area businesses.
TICKETS AND ACCOMMODATIONS PACKAGES ARE NOW ON SALE VISIT WWW.COASTALUNCORKED.COM FOR TICKETS AND PRICING
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3/9/11 10:25 AM
Ask about our upcoming seminar Come hear facts about our medically supervised rapid weight loss program and the Vectra 3d Sculptor Procedure… The ONLY one in SC that allows you to preview the procedures BEFORE they are performed! $1000 Off Tummy Tuck Expires 5/31/11
$500 Off Breast Augmentation Expires 5/31/11
$1000 Off Facelift Expires 5/31/11
$1000 Off Liposuction Expires 5/31/11
$20 Off LATISSE® Expires 5/31/11
For a Free Consultation, Call 1-888-904-1280 Now! 8212 Devon Court • Myrtle Beach 8212 Devon Court • Myrtle Beach www.SculptedFigures.com www.SculptedFigures.com