De-Stress
Wedding Special
Summer Issue 2010
The A to Z of Weddings Why use a Make-Up Artist on your Wedding Day How to Choose a Wedding Photographer Stress Tips for the Bride-to-be The Pros and Cons of getting married abroad
Sean & Karina’s Story Married in Las Vegas Photograph by kind permission of Johannes Roux Š Johannes Roux - www.johannes-weddings.com
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A Word from the Editor Hi, I'm Catherine A Connors and like many of you, I know first-hand what it's like to live with the challenges of today’s modern and fast paced world. Many people are now turning towards a more holistic and natural way to live and deal with day to day life. I'm a Stress Management Consultant, Time Management Consultant and a holistic therapist, trainer and teacher. This combination puts me in an unique position where I can offer professional guidance with the added touch of deep understanding that can come only through personal experience and knowledge. This magazine is an in-house magazine and was created to bring advice and knowledge to anyone suffering from stress. This magazine is lucky to have many highly experienced contributors and you can read and enjoy their articles here. As a Stress Consultant and holistic health expert, I have much experience dealing with health issues relating to the mind-body connections and welcome any questions you may have as regards health, holistic living or therapies and natural solutions. These questions will be answered either on the magazine or on my web-site, please remember to put ‘Ask Catherine’ in the subject heading. If you would like to see a particular article appear within this magazine, are specialized in a particular area which may interests our readers and your would like to contribute, you are welcome to send your suggestions by emailing stress_solutions4life@yahoo.com
Contents Page 4
The A to Z of Weddings
Page 7
Why use a Make-Up Artist on your Wedding Day
Page 8
Stress Tips for the Bride-to-be
Page 10
Inviting Children to Weddings
Page 11
How to Choose a Wedding Photographer
Page 16
Stress Free Weddings...
Page 17
Pros and Cons of Getting Married abroad
To learn more about Catherine A Connors and her work please visit her website at www.stress-solutions4life.com You can also read more about Stress Management and Natural solutions by visiting Catherine’s blog sites www.stresssolutions4life.wordpress.com www.naturalsolutions4life.wordpress.com
De-Stress is an in-house magazine and is published quarterly by Stress Solutions 4 Life. No part of this magazine may be reproduced without the permission of the publisher. Every effort has been made to ensure that all the information in this magazine is factual and correct at the time of press. The opinions expressed in this issue are not necessarily those of the editor or Stress Solutions 4 Life. Articles, advertisements and information in ‘De-Stress are provided for education and debate only. The information contained with the magazine in not intended to be used by non-medically qualified readers as a substitute for, or basis of, medical treatment, since some material may be speculative and/or not in agreement with current medical practice. Always check with your GP before trying any remedies and in particular always seek medical advice if you are pregnant or taking medication before following the advise given in articles or advertisements in this magazine. De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 3
By Jennie Byrne of TheVenueShop.ie Alcohol: The main aspects are;
Cake: While the look of the cake
Favours: Again lots of options
is important the flavour is ultimately vital, people will remember a bad tasting cake. Meet with potential suppliers and arrange a tasting. If your budget doesn’t stretch to fancy decoration or your colour scheme remember you can buy it plain and do some DIY decoration yourself with ribbons, flowers and a brooch (no one will know the difference) Also bear in mind that you can put dummy tiers on the cake, if you what a 4 tier cake but you feel it will be either too much or Budget: The wedding budget is out of budget make the top tier a dummy. ultimately the most important aspect of a wedding and the most overlooked. There Dress: Lots of choices out there, is no point in having a dream wedding when you can’t afford it. Both of you research bridal boutiques online and write a list of what the important ele- book an appointment. Try on lots of difments are for your wedding – the venue, ferent style dresses to see which one the music, having everyone there etc. suits best. Don’t be afraid to shop around Swap lists and cross reference each and negotiate. Remember it could take other’s ideas. You might be surprised of up to 8 months to order in your dress and your partner’s ideas. List the important that doesn’t include time for alternations factors starting with the most important etc – so start dress shopping ASA right down to the least important. Get prices for these and then decide on what Emergency Kit: Can be vital on you can afford. If you have a strict price guideline that you can afford – STICK TO the day and you will be thankful of it, IT. If a supplier is too expensive move on, things to include should be: there are plenty of suppliers out there you can afford. My motto has always - Hair Clips been to spend the money where matters. - Hair Spray What do people notice the most – Venue - Nails, Glue, File, Clippers & Polish (Food), Band and obviously the couple, is - Tweezers it worth spending a fortune on things - Tissues that won’t even be noticed?? - Makeup - Mints Tip: Create a spreadsheet, Negotiate, - Deodorant Look for Deals Online, Avoid Costly Sur- - Perfume prises, Be Savvy & Research, Be Creative, - Safety Pins Open a Bank Account Dedicated to Wed- - Plasters ding Savings, and Keep a Positive Atti- - Flat Shoes tude. The cheapest or most expensive - Sewing Kit isn’t always the best. - Spot/Stain Remover & While Chalk - Pain Killers
available for wedding favours, Candles, Sweets, Chocolate etc. For a great DIY & cheap option write a brief personalized note to each guest. Be creative and double use your favours as place settings – name on the box or sweet wrapper.
Drinks Reception, During the Meal and Toast Drink. Make your decision on what goes best with your budget whether it is Tea/Coffee, wine, champagne, cocktails or beer etc. White & red wine is normally a 60/40 rule and to reduce costs don’t include a toast drink or see Favours further down about making your toast drink and wedding favour into one.
De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 4
Alcohol miniatures are my favorite wedding favours as they can double up as a toast drink. Guest-list: To begin creating a guest list create a spreadsheet with “Yes” “No” & “Maybe” columns (the “No’s” are for those you remove from the other columns) Sometimes it is handier to create sub lists for Brides List, Groom List, Parents List etc but ensure not to duplicate. Excel has a formula for deleting duplications so make sure to use this. Sit down with the Groom or Parents and go through the list – if you are trying to keep numbers down CUT CUT CUT. My motto with guest lists is to keep the line dead straight. Once you have your final guest list create a spreadsheet similar to the below that will help you manage RSVPs Here is a sample wedding guest list layout:
Honeymoon: Go to a reputable travel agent for advice and guidance. Remember to research the seasons according to when you wish to travel. Also
check expiry dates of passports as some your wedding. Here are some helpful tips countries only accept passports that are to guarantee a perfect day: no less than 6 months away from expiry. - Check in advance if certain music isn’t allowed during ceremony (some priests Invites: DIY, bespoke, retail or don’t allow modern music) high street it comes down to your per- - Don’t be afraid to give performers (DJ, sonal choice, time and budget. DIY invites Band, Singers etc) a list of songs that you are great, if you have the creativity and DON’T want, also good to give it in writing patience. Bespoke invites can be expen- - It is hard to please everyone music wise sive but you are getting a unique one of a but I would suggest to try have a good kind invite, great if you have an idea in mix of different genres, this way you are your head but can’t find or make it your- guaranteed a full dance floor. Remember it is a long night of music; younger guests self. will be around for the whole night, while Video invites are becoming very popular the older ones probably won’t. Keep muand if given some consideration and sic for the younger guests until later on in imagination could save you money while the night. standing out from the crowd. Negotiating: This should be Just a Reception: This is becoming done for EVERY element of your wedding very popular; couples are having a very - your venue to your music, dress, shoes, intimate wedding day with just immedi- hair, makeup, suits, flowers, cake etc ate family (Ceremony then dinner), going EVERYTHING. Don’t be afraid to ask for a on honeymoon and on return have a discount or something thrown in. Remember all those savings can go towards party with all family and friends. your honeymoon. Kids: at weddings is all down to personal choice (and the size of your family) you may have lots of young nieces and nephews you want to share your special day with, or just the bridal party (pageboy & flower girl) whatever the case if you are inviting kids to your wedding ensure that they are entertained in some way. A wedding can be a long day for young kids & the parents minding them. Hiring a clown, face painter etc can be one way of keeping them entertained but think about colouring books or toys to play with at the table during the meal also. Lighting: Add impact and ambiance to your wedding with creative lighting. Candles, Tea lights and Lanterns are cheap to buy and can make a wonderful romantic setting. Fairy lights or Chinese lanterns are great for decorating outdoor areas. While up lighters around the banquet room will really set the tone. Music: Is a great way to reflect your personality and set the tone for
Organisation: Being organised simply means knowing where the information is when you need it such as contracts, phone numbers, pictures etc it doesn’t have to be hard work, simply create a Wedding folder. Pre made folders can be bought in book shops or you can create your own by buying a ring binder, plastic inserts and dividers. Create sections in your folder for each specific area allowing for quick reference, such as
to take the photos of your day, hire a professional. Research local photographers, meet with them and view their work. Most photographers can do a package deal which will include the video or can recommend a good videographer. Quotes: Get at least 5 written quotes for each element (photographer, cake etc) do not accept quotes over the phone, ask suppliers to send a confirmation email outlining the quote and what exactly is included for that price. Registration: One of the top ‘To Do’ things on your list is to find out the details of registering marriage/marriage notification process etc depending on where and how you are getting married. Speeches: A nerve racking time for most people, the wedding speeches is one of the key highlights to the day. There are lots of techniques to overcome the nervous of public speaking, such as: - Eye Contact - Speed - speak slowly - Posture - stand still - Natural - be yourself and mean what you say - Time - don’t drag it out - Smile Table Centrepieces: To create an
extravagant wedding ambience, whatever the budget, the centrepieces should be given some serious consideration, whether you hire them or do a DIY version it can really give your venue the - Photographer - store all contact details, ‘WOW’ factor. There are lots of different contracts and receipts types of centrepieces available and it re- Bouquets - create mood boards for ar- ally depends on your taste and budget, eas of your wedding with pictures of the here are just some of the different types things you like either found on the internet or in magazines. - Floral - Guest-lists etc - Candelabra (With Ivy, large, small, crystal, etc) Tip: Keep a ‘To Do’ list as a reference - Glass Bowls (With floating candles or guide to keep you on track flowers) - Glass Vases (With a single flower or a full bouquet of flowers & beads) Photographer: The photos of - Candles (Pillar or tea lights) your weddings are basically memory catcher and something you and your fam- For something totally unique try: ily and other generations will look back - Fruit on in years to come. Don’t rely on a friend - Feathers De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 5
- Birdhouse/Birdcage (filled with flowers or decoration) - Clocks - Fish Bowl with a goldfish (or fake fish) - Favours (favours that double as centrepieces) Unique Ideas: Don’t be afraid to think outside the box, personalised your special day with some of your own unique ideas. Get some inspiration from magazines, websites and blogs. Venue: Some tips for choosing your perfect wedding venue; - Have a rough idea of your guest numbers - no point in finding the perfect venue and it doesn’t fit all your guests - Write a list of the key elements you require and score each venue based on your requirements, such as location, grounds and size etc - Take photos of the venues (get permission) so you can look back over the photos - Have your church picked (or idea of church location) so you can work out travelling time - If going for civil marriage - does the venue cater for this? - Get the venue to give you a "walk through" of the day, where you will come in, where your guests will be directed etc. This will give you a great feel for the venue - Suss out the surrounding area for photo opportunities - Make sure the prices you are quoted are for the year you are looking to get married in and if it’s a midweek or weekend rate
- Is there a charge for bar extension? - What time is the residents bar open until? - Are the menus flexible? (if there is something you dislike) - Is a menu tasting included? - What are their booking & payment terms? (a lot of hotels are asking for full payment one week before the wedding) - What is their corkage charge? - Are they child friendly? (if you plan to have children at your wedding) - Is there a special accommodation rate for guests? - What is included in the price? - red carpet, T&C on arrival, cake stand etc - Where are wedding photos taken? - If your thinking fireworks - double check with the venue if it’s been done there before or not, they will know if there are any restrictions on this or not
looking for specific wedding suppliers and ideas but can’t execute them yourself. Remember a wedding planner can be your personal PA on your wedding day, you don’t have to ask a family member or friend to check has the church been decorated or have the bouquets arrived, your wedding planner will have this all sorted. Arrange a meeting with your local wedding planner to see how they can help your day be as stress free as possible. Xtra Entertainment: Besides
from the wedding band & DJ, couples are looking into creating more xtra entertainment for their guests, with such things like Fireworks, Magician, Singing Waiters, Caricaturist, Casino Tables, Dancers and Video-Guest Book. Tip: If your venue is not permitted to have Fireworks on the grounds look at Wedding Planner: Is not just for hiring Fire Performers instead. the rich and famous. Yes they do charge a Your Flowers:
You can go as flower mad as you’d like (or can afford) main areas to cover are: Spreads for Ceremony, Brides Bouquet, Bridesmaid Bouquet, Button Holes for Grooms men & Fathers, headpiece or bouquet for flower girl. Also don’t forget arrangement of flowers for Granny, Mothers and anyone else who has helped you out. If allergic to flowers or would want something different why don’t you try: Feathered Bouquets, Fruit Bouquets, Butterfly Boufee but you are paying for their experi- quets, Shell Bouquets, Button Bouquets, ence, creativity and most importantly Pinecone Bouquets, Crystal Bouquets. cost saving tips. A wedding planner will provide you with vital advise, organisation, contacts, savings and tips. They all ZZzzzzzzzz: Coming up to your big should be flexible to your needs and reQuestions to ask the venue: day ensure to get plenty of sleep and requirements. A wedding planner could relaxation. Make sure to get plenty of fresh - Is there an extra charge for catering for ally come in handy if you work full time air and exercise, it will help switch off people with dietary requirements, such a and are finding it hard making the time to your mind and sleep. Stay stress free and research wedding suppliers or if you are vegetarians etc positive. - What time is the bar open until? De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 6
I’m sure that’s a question many bridesto-be have asked themselves. Or indeed, been asked by their finace/mother/ mother-in-law! “You do your own makeup every day? Why get someone in to do what you already do yourself?” I’m going to take you through all the factors of bridal make-up and explain the how's and whys. As a make up artist with 14 years experience, I’ve done the make-up for more brides than I can count. Each one had an individually designed look. Some wanted dark smoky eyes, others wanted soft, barely there neutrals and everything imaginable inbetween. The one factor they all had in common? They all wanted to look their absolute best. The wedding day is the one day when looking perfect is imperative! So you need to take into consideration these aspects: Longevity - This make-up needs to last all the day. And night! You don’t want to be touching up your eye-shadow and re-concealing half way through the day. Good make-up artists have tricks a plenty up their sleeves when it comes to achieving that long stay finish. I always pay close attention to the skin and address any underlying issues before I even touch it with base. Then there’s setting the make-up without looking dry and powdery, stopping the eyes from creasing and liner from smudging. Photography - Flash photography can have a huge effect on the make-up you wear. It can change what looks like a natural make-up into a ‘nothing at all’ look. That smudge of kohl pencil and quick coat of mascara won’t stand up to the job. Without enough definition
around the eyes, they’ll disappear (not literally, just photographically). The art is having enough on so your features are defined but not so much that you feel over done. I have a technique where I press linger into the roots of the lash, this gives the right amount of depth just where its needed. Plus, its water proof, of course!
and create you a look that combines your own style with new ideas. The idea is not to make you look like someone else, just a more polished, perfect version of you! Don’t be afraid to show clippings from magazine of make-up that you’ve seen. Sometimes it’s easier to show than to describe. That’s what trials are for....
When it comes to foundation, having a base on that doesn't reflect well can lead to a washed out complexion. I’m a stickler for ensuring the skin looks as flawless as possible without even looking as though there is any make-up on. A make-up artist will have a variety of shades in his/her kit, that way, if you’ve had a spray tan or used a self tan at home, your face will match your body exactly. There’s nothing worse than your face looking like its stuck onto someone else's body.
Time - Don’t underestimate how manic the morning of your wedding can get. I like to take the bride off into another room to do her make-up. This gives her a break from the mayhem and lets her focus on the most important thing, herself.
I painstakingly custom blend the foundation on the day to get the perfect shade and texture. Also, be very careful not to use light reflective products, unless they’re being used for clever highlighting and contouring, they can reflect back a white tone, especially around the eyes and can be spotted a mile off. The Look - We, as women, are super critical when we look in the mirror! It’s hard for us to be objective when it comes to our own faces. That's why we so often get stuck in make-up ruts. A make-up artist looks at you differently.
It’s one of the things my brides always comment on, how relaxed they feel by the time their make-up is done. Between myself and the hairdresser, we get the bride ready first and then it’s time for the bridesmaids, mother-of-thebride and everyone else. Then, when everyone is done, I return to the bride. By this time, she’s hopefully had something to eat and drink. It’s time for a small sip of champagne and the last touch ups. I put her lips on last, check the bride has her touch up items in a little bag. I then have a look at her back, shoulders and arms for any blemishes that need camouflaging, get those covered and seated and wait for the dress to be put on.
Finally, I take a picture on my digital camera to check there’s nothing reflectI look at my client and I see the beauty in ing badly with the flash. Then I show her face. I see what I want to enhance the bride so she can see how amazing and emphasize, as opposed to what I she looks. want to cover. This gives a fresh take on styles and colours that you may have Thanks to Katy from never though of. A good make-up artist www.makeupbykaty.com for submitwill bear what you do every day in mind ting this article. De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 7
By Ciara Dubby As someone who is married herself, helped out closely with the weddings of family and friends, and who has been running a bridal shop for the past 6 years, I have been able to see firsthand many of the stressful episodes that couples can encounter, and hopefully provide a little insight to these, coupled with a few tips on how to avoid them! From the perspective of someone who sells wedding dresses, one of the first things I would say is don't leave it too late to go looking for the dress of your dreams. Most bridal shops will ask you to give them 6 months notice for ordering a dress. This is to allow the dress to be made, delivered, fitted and altered. I would advise looking about 10 - 12 months in advance so that you don't end up 'panic buying' because you know you're leaving it tight! The last thing you want is to be told by a sales assistant that you need to order 'this week!' and even in doing so, the dress will be due two weeks before the wedding. Things completely out of anyone's control can delay things take Icelandic volcano cancelling flights and playing havoc with deliveries for example. So if you give yourself plenty of time, the pressure will be off. I would also advise to take only one or two close friends or family members with you to choose your dress. Many girls land with groups of 6 or 7 'helpers' to pick a dress, and you can bet your last cent that they would all pick different dresses out as their favorite. The worst is when a bride is looking at herself in a dress and a very opinionated friend or sister screws up her face and says that the bride looks like a doll on toilet roll holder. A recipe for a very stressful
dress-finding exercise. So choose your In relation to the planning stages of a helpers wisely! wedding, there can be a lot of stressful tensions in a family when an engagement It is a good idea to set a budget for your- is announced (sometimes over a son or selves too. This doesn’t just apply to daughter’s choice of spouse which is a wedding dresses. Set yourself a budget really tricky one). For many, it could be for each item, and try to stick to it. If you disagreements with parents over who to go over budget on one thing, try to cut invite. Most couples nowadays are payback on another. No couple wants to ing for their own wedding and want to start married life up to their ears in debt keep numbers down, asking only those due to out-of-control wedding day spend- who they want to invite. This can be a ing. If you visit a shop and tell them what tricky one when a parent feels obliged to your budget is, the staff will only be too ask certain friends or relatives that you happy to show you what they have in that haven’t counted in. I have noticed a lot range. There’s no point trying on 2500€ more couples more recently who are optwedding dresses if your budget is 1000€ ing to have a very small and intimate max. Don’t be bashful about picking up wedding with 30 – 40 guests and then the phone and asking the price range. having a bigger ‘evening do’ later that day People do this all the time in my shop, for everyone else to join in the celebraand I can always either re-assure them tion. Many brides and grooms also get that my dresses are in budget, or if not, I nervous and stressed out about taking can help point them in the right direction their vows in front of a huge crowd of or tell them about a forthcoming sample spectating guests, and this is often a good sale. compromise to take the pressure off. Sample sales are a great way to get a gorgeous dress at a fraction of the price. It’s a much better option than going down the internet route. I have had several brides landing to my shop in tears over the past few years, where they have cut costs by ordering a wedding dress online. Most of these ‘cheap’ dresses are poor quality copies of designer dresses (that may not even be the right size or colour) and most girls wouldn’t dream of wearing them when they actually see them in the flesh. No bride wants the added stress of having to look for a lastminute dress for one of the most important (and most photographed) days of her life. Or worse still, to have to wear some of the really bad ones I have seen.
De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 8
Many also go abroad to save costs (and hassle) and take only their closest friends and family with them, and then organise a big party when they come home. It can be a good idea if the destination is shorthaul, and the guests can make it their annual holiday. Italy and Cyprus seem to be the two most popular destinations at the moment, and your travel agent will team you up with a wedding co-ordinater who will make sure everything runs like clock-work. Most brides tell me that it doesn’t work out much cheaper overall having this type of wedding, but they love that fact that a huge chunk of the stress is cut out and they find the wedding preparations are much more relaxed.
One thing I tell all my customers is not to be afraid to delegate in the run up to the wedding. Bridesmaids and groomsmen aren’t just there to look good in their dresses and suits on the day! Delegate members of the bridal party to pick up suits, pick up dresses, collect cakes and help with errands for last minute things. Chances are, they will only be too happy to help out where they can, freeing up time for you to organise things like seating plans, final numbers, menus, and of course all those trips to the salon to make sure you are looking your best on the day!
wedding, they announced they were having a ‘night’ in the house for everyone to come around with their gifts and to see the bride and groom. They had plenty of supplies in to give the visitors a wee drink and a bite to eat – everyone had a great night’s craic – and the week of the wedding there was only a trickle of visitors. A complete contrast to our house – there were visitors every night of the week of the wedding to be entertained – we were practically kicking some of my uncles out the door at 3am the night before my own wedding! So much for us girls having a quiet night in to paint our The week of the wedding will be a busy nails, have a glass of wine or two, and an time for visitors coming with gifts and early night! cards, and my in-laws had a great idea for taking the pressure off of having to enter- I hope that anyone reading this will pick tain a continuous stream of people arriv- up a few tips that will make the run up to ing. About a week and a half before the their wedding a little less stressful! And
remember the most important thing of all. It’s not all about putting on an impressive wedding day and for everything being perfect. The wedding day is the first day of a marriage where two people will spend the rest of their lives together. Try and make decisions together in the preparation for your marriage – letting one person call all the shots is not a good foot to start off on! Share the workload and try to organize as much as possible together (but I do draw the line at having the groom help pick the dresses!) And don’t lose sight of the fact that the most important thing is that you will be marrying the person who you want to be with forever, all the days of your life… Thanks to Ciara Duddy of www.beautifuldaybrides.co.uk for submitting this article.
Beautiful Day - Bridal Cottage. Vale Centre, Greysteel, Co Derry, N Ireland. Tel 02871 813682 Stockists of Wedding gowns, bridesmaid dresses, mens hirewear, formal, special occasionwear and Communion wear. www.beautifuldaybrides.co.uk Package deals available - 10% off bridesmaids when you buy your wedding dress with us. Order 6 mens suits, and the groom goes free! Huge selection of Maggie Sottero wedding dress. De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 9
There are many considerations on inviting children to a wedding. If you have not made concrete plans yet it is strongly advised to figure out who among the possible guests has children their ages, whether family of your guests live nearby to babysit, and whether some are attending from afar. Also important is whether your families have small children - this becomes very sticky because the wedding is a mini family reunion and to un-invite children means you could be creating world war three in the family since aunts, uncles, and grandparents may only see the children on events such as weddings.
ding clothes, babysitters can be hard to find, and if the parents expect the kids are invited they already be excited about the day.
can or letting it be known when it comes up. Having "a line" that you give to your parents and in-laws will help keep the hurt feelings to a minimum. Something like, "they came to the really difficult deExpecting everyone to know wedding cision that with the space, budget and etiquette is a lot to ask of anyone, espetime of the wedding it was best to have cially most of your guests who are long an adults-only wedding." Something that ago married or who are so used to bring- allows for the awareness that hurt feeling the children they wouldn’t even noings may arise, but the decision was not tice the lack of their names. simply about you not liking their chilIf you are aware that feelings may be dren. hurt it is much better to get it out in the open as soon as you know the event is Another idea could be providing childchild free rather than letting people ascare on the day, this gives all the parents sume children are invited and waiting a much needed break during the day until too close to the date to inform while providing fun and entertainment Waiting until 6-8 weeks before a wedthem. for the smaller guests. This is becoming ding to say it’s child free when you knew far more popular with weddings and is 13 months ago is potentially asking for The reality is you can avoid a lot of highly recommended for anyone who trouble. Parents are often aware of stress if you chose to not invite children wish to have children at their wedding needing to buy their children new wed- by spreading the world as soon as you stress free.
Little Wedding Crechers is here to help every couple with the dilemma of whether to invite children to their big day or not. Making a decision to not have children at your wedding can often cause great stress to the couple, family and friends. It can often be a case of damned if you do and damned if you don’t. And that is why we are here to help. You may wish to book us for your full day or maybe just for the meal and speeches, or even just for the ceremony, whatever your needs we are here to help. We will tailor a programme of activities for your exact needs to suit the profile of your little guests. Whatever package you choose we will make each of your little guests feel like they were centre of attention while you relax and enjoy your day. Full details about Little Wedding Crechers can be found on their website www.littleweddingcrechers.com De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 10
Photograph by kind permission of Johannes Roux © Johannes Roux - www.johannes-weddings.com
A drawer opens and inside an warn box reveals itself. What is this you think to yourself. The mystery is too much and without thinking about it too long you free the box from the dark holding of the drawer and place it beside you on the bed. Excitement springs to life inside you, you look around the room, its your bedroom in Granny's house, the one she always prepared for you when you stayed over on school holidays. You look at the box again and wonder why you have never seen this box before. Its not the first time you have looked through these drawers. As a little girl you used to love going through all the drawers and wardrobes pretending you were a princess in a magical land finding magical friends and lost treasures in Granny's house. Your 22 now and it is your wedding tomorrow... you look at the box again and decide to open it. White tissue paper reveals an old photo album still in mint condition, Wow you think and with a big smile you look up and find your granny standing in the door smiling back at you with so much love. Suddenly you know, this is Granny's wedding album and knowing you so well she left it in the drawer for you to find.
by - Johannes Roux As the two of you page through the album she tells you all about her wedding day, who designed he dress, where the material came from, how long she was looking for those white satin shoes, how much the flowers cost, the roast beef they had and how much your great grandfather enjoyed the wine. The photos showed your grandfather, tall and proud with a hairstyle fresh of the cut and how proud he was holding your grannys hand, looking at her with so much tender love. With every page turn you could see how the photographs one after the other brought new life into her, it was as if she could feel every details of her special day and thats when you know you made the right choice in booking that professional wedding photographer. Now you too would be able to share your wedding day indetail with your grandchild some day.
you’ve made your purchase. The reality is that, your purchase is based largely on good faith and interestingly enough (yet, understandably so in todays financial climate) so many couples allow price to be the primary determining factor. My question thow is: does this really make much sense, when you consider that your photographer really just have one shot to get this right - right..?! (does this sound to strong?) Well - where do you start.. you may ask..?!
You should start with some good educational resurge on wedding photography, as a) there are a number of "styles" (e.g. traditional, photojournalism and illustrative) photographers may prefer and/ or can use to photograph a wedding and b) there are also a good number of very talented wedding photographers out So you have a proud hand glittering with there with very reasonable price tags. the sparkles of a precious stone wrapped elegantly in that shiny metal, So, before I start with a small introducyour date is set and the venue is booked. tion to the main styles out there, allow Yes, it's time to shop for a photographer. me to give you some food for thought. However, shopping for a wedding photographer is not really the same as shop- • What time is your ceremony? ping for flowers and bridal fashion for • What time is your reception? one simple good reason: you don't get to • How long will it take you to get from see what you are buying until way after the ceremony to the reception? De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 11
• How many guests do you expect at the ceremony? - Have you considered the time you will allocate for every one to congratulate you after the ceremony? Say there are 100 guests and you allocated 30 seconds for each guest you will spend around 50 min only on shaking hands, sharing kisses, hugs and real loving words, which are all very special experiences and I strongly encourage this interaction with your guests. - Account for this time though, as it can if not accounted for - eat into your time schedule creating a nock-on effect to your schedule. • What time of year are you getting married? - How much daylight can you expect at that time? - Will it be in a rainy season? - Are you prepared for the elements? • If you feel strongly about your photography and want your day to be photographed with all its opportunities and moments, it would be wise to allocate the right amount of time for it. Talk to your photographer, share your ideas, needs and wants in transparent detail and ask them how much time they
would need to make it happen. Consider their response - is it reasonable and does it make sense?
Traditional style: Wedding photography started with the traditional style approach. This is a timeless style of photography that you've probably seen time and time again. The bedrock of this style is well posed photographs of the key moments. Pros: Traditional photographers usually shoot a planned photo list, meaning you will get all the important photographs. Cons: This approach can become time consuming if not managed correctly, resulting in the bride and groom spending less time with their guests. Your wedding album will look very attractive, but might be a little bit predictable.
Wedding photojournalism: This is a contemporary style also known as reportage and documentary photography, which has become a very popular style in years of late. It is essentially a
collection of candid photographs covering the day as it unfolds. Pros: Wedding photojournalism will give you a series of unique photographs aimed to reflect the story of your wedding day. Cons: There is no guaranteed photographs as with a planned photo list, there is only the photographer's instincts and photographs are unpredictable. It is very important to get the right photographer here as couples may regret the absence of some traditional and expected photographs.
Illustrative style: This is a style where photographers place there clients in certain settings to take advantage of really good lighting and background conditions. With the scene set, the bride and groom are free to be themselves, resulting in spontaneous, fun and sexy photographs. It is basically an amalgamation of the traditional and photojournalistic styles, allowing the photographer to take advantage of artistic opportunities still capturing real moments between the couple and there bridal party. Photograph by kind permission of Johannes Roux © Johannes Roux - www.johannes-weddings.com
De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 12
Photograph by kind permission of Johannes Roux Š Johannes Roux - www.johannes-weddings.com
This style is often used in pre wedding shoots and is becoming very popular, as it is seen as the best of both worlds. Now, armed with a better understand of what styles are out there it is time to stat a list for wedding photographers in your wedding diary. Build your list by asking friends and relatives for some recommendations. Visit online wedding websites, your favorite wedding magazine, wedding blogs and do a general search in google for wedding photographers in and around your area and the area where you plan to have your wedding at. Visit each photographer's website and carefully review their portfolios. Focus on photographs, but also how they present their business online as this can be a good indication and extension of the photographers attention to detail. Good photographers will usually show off full weddings in their gallery sections and their most recent work on their blogs. If and when the photographers work appeal to you, add them to your possible
meeting list. You will know when you feel the "click"..!!
Here are some questions worth asking:
With a short email or a quick phone call you can establish if the photographer is availability for your wedding date, what type of style the specialties in (e.g., traditional, photojournalism or a combination, etc.) You can also get a rough idea as to what their fees are and what you come to expect of their wedding packages. This entail contact should also tell you more bit about the photographer’s personality and character.
1) What can I expect from your packages? 2) What exactly can I expect from a booking? 3) What time do you start and when do you finish? 4) Do you work with an assistant? 5) Will you be taking the actual photographer on my wedding day? 6) Is there an extra cost involved for photoshop work on my album photographs? At this point you can arrange meetings 7) When will my photographs be ready with the photographers who sounded for viewing? promising. Have a close look at there al- 8) How will you show me the photobums, photos and other products. Be graphs for selection? (e.g. contacts sure to write down all your questions sheets, online gallery, in studio or home before your meeting and take notes dur- projection, etc.) ing it. Be sure to share your likes and 9) Will you help me choose the final most importantly dislikes that you might photographs? have on photography. Remember, there 10) How long do I have to make up my is no such thing as a dumb question, so if mind as to which pictures I want in my in doubt - ask. The more questions you album? ask up front, the more relaxed and confi- 11) How long will it take before I have dent you will feel about your photogramy album? phy on and after your wedding day. De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 13
12) How about engagement session? 13) How can friends and family order reprints? 14) How long have you been in business? 15) What’s your philosophy to photographing weddings? 16) Do you have travel fees? 17) How much is your overtime fee? 18) What do you plan to do at my wedding to make my wedding photographs unique and personal to me? 19) Do you have a backup? 20) Who will I be dealing with after the wedding? 21) What's your payment policy - wedding-date changes - an unforeseen cancellation, etc.? 22) If I do go ahead with a booking, what will your plan A, B and C be..?
largements, time, etc., and should be very clear on what level of service and final products you can expect. Now at this point, you should know which photographer is for you, whether they are available, and if their service is worth the price. Keep in mind that photographers are trained professionals and that they deserve to be treated as such. Therefor go to your meetings prepared to sign a contract and leave a deposit to book and secure your date.
This is diving into the deep end with your photographer to test their ability to direct and produce good photographs with an audience. If you are happy with the results and you feel the emotion in there work you might have a winner. But do sleep on it..!! Good wedding photographers are much more than just someone turning up to take a few photographs on your wedding day. They are talented and creative people that specialize in creating and capturing moments, emotions, style and beauty that In the ideal world, there is no budgets will be reflected, remembered and enand I would like you to consider the joyed for as long as the photograph surrisks and opportunities with allocating a vives what time throws at it.. By small budget to your photography as it choosing your wedding photographer is possible to make a saving with your carefully you can rest assured in the photography by allowing a friend, family knowledge that this is undoubtedly one member or even a new wedding photog- of the best and most intelligent decisions rapher to photograph your wedding day. you've made in planning your wedding, As you can see there is a number of pos- In fairness we all have and had to start and that you will have a stunning wedsible questions you can ask your photog- somewhere. However, before you go ding album that shows you at your best rapher and most professional down this road it is worth knowing your for years to come. photographers will provide you with a risks and do your best to minimize them clear insight to their services prior to or at the very least, test the photograCongratulations on your engagement any questions being asked. Many of pher's ability to shoot under pressured and may your wedding be the fairy-tale them have full and transparent packages conditions. Arrange a pre-wedding or you always dreamed it to be. that include albums, digital files, enengagement shoot in a very public place. Photograph by kind permission of Johannes Roux Š Johannes Roux - www.johannes-weddings.com
De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 14
Johannes Weddings specialize in telling a beautiful story of love, romance and friendship through a series of special pictures that create concrete memories and are guaranteed to become family heirlooms Johannes Photography LTD +353.86.077.4644 www.johannes-photography.com info@johannes-photography.com www.johannes-weddings.com info@johannes-weddings.com
Photograph by kind permission of Johannes Roux Š Johannes Roux - www.johannes-weddings.com
Sweet basil - Good wishes Yellow violet - Happiness
De-Stress Magazine Recommend
Stephanotis - Happiness in Marriage Rose, red chrysanthemum, myrtle and orchid - Love White camellia - Loveliness
This is De-Stress’s guide to the meaning of your wedding flowers. Sunflower - Adortation Alyssum (sweet) and Amaryllis - Beauty Althaea and Alcea Deeply in Love Honeysuckle - Devoted affection Holly - Domestic Happiness Ivy, veronica and lemon blossoms - Fidelity Purple lilac - First Love
Lavender (also luck) and orange blossoms - Purity Forget me not True Love White Chrysanthemum - Truth
Buds and Berries offers a unique and special Wedding Flowers service. They are a creative floral design company specialising in weddings, and corporate events and examples of their work can be viewed on their website. They are located in County Kildare, Ireland.
Buds and Berries Website: www.budsandberries.com
Amaranth - Unfading Love
Wedding Stress Tips Stay healthy: Don't neglect yourself. Eat properly. Get aerobic exercise. Make sure that you get enough sleep. It helps to alleviate stress and all of the health problems that can result from too many life pressures. When you're angry and frustrated, go out for a walk or run. Go walking with your spouse to be and have time for conversation. De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 15
Article by www.firedropdesign.com I remember as a little girl playing with my barbie and pretending to walk up the aisle to meet my ‘Ken’. My sister and I used to make our barbie wedding dresses out of tissue! It’s amusing to think of it now, but what is clear is that from a very young age, many of us girls dream of our wedding and what the day will go like. Obviously nothing ever goes wrong, and the whole thing goes off with out a hitch!
them, but keep a clear picture of what feedback, it became apparent that a large you want as a couple and stick to it. Learn percentage of couples would have been to say ‘No’ assertively but politely! happier with a smaller wedding that consisted of really close friends and family 3. Research your suppliers well. Try to only. Some brides mentioned that they get personal recommendations from felt under a little pressure to have as other brides if possible. Insist on a con- many people there as possible, or found tract, (most vendors will supply one any- themselves not being able to say no when way) and go through it with a fine tooth parents etc insisted on person X, Y and Z comb. When do you need to make pay- being invited that you haven’t seen in ments, what exactly are you getting for twenty years! Then you meet that special someone and your money . If you are getting a photoghe gets down on one knee and the plan- rapher, discuss with him/her beforehand 5. Don’t forget the person you’re ning really starts. While it’s so exciting, where you will have photos taken, a back marrying! – some couples get so busy that this amazing day is about while in the midst of planning, to finally happen, it can quickly that they forget why they are become stressful. getting married in the first place. Make time to spend to1. The first thing to rememgether and do something you ber is that you will get stressed, both enjoy that doesn’t involve so expect it. There are so many anything related to planning the things to think about such as big day. Sometimes, it’s helpful the hotel venue, wedding bookto take a step back and rememlets, florist, photographer, band ber that while your wedding is a and DJ, the dress, the rings and momentous occasion, the most so many more things you can’t important bit is that you are in even imagine! With so many love and starting a new life tofamily, friends and vendors ingether. volved, things will go wrong. Try to remember that you can’t For the day itself, some adcontrol everything, so If somevice from recent Irish newlything does go askew and you weds; can’t do anything about it, Don’t worry. Don’t expect perfection, 1. If possible write down a because with so many things rough schedule of the day so that need to be organized, it everyone knows what they would be a small miracle for need to do. But don’t underestieverything to go perfectly. mate the time needed for hair up location just in case the weather takes and make up, photos, getting to and from 2. Don’t try to please everyone – be a turn for the worst, and a list of must- the hotel. Often things will be delayed, aware that everyone will have their own have shots for the day. which will then have knock on effects for opinions on what type of day you should the rest of the evening. Accept that timhave, which may not be what you had 4. Don’t be afraid of having a smaller ings will slip. planned yourself. By all means listen to wedding. - While researching newlywed De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 16
2. Ensure that a groomsman or bridesmaid has a list of all your suppliers and their phone number, just in case they go AWOL on the day. 3. Ask you hairdresser and make-up artist to arrive half an hour before they need to start, just in case they get delayed. Make sure that you are the first to be done. This will give you some time to relax. Make sure to eat! 4. Bring a reliable bridesmaid with you to your dress fittings. This will ensure that there will be someone else besides you, that knows how to get you in and out of your dress and how to bustle it on the morning. 5. Bring cover for your dress for the day after when you want to bring your wedding dress home 6. Have your bridesmaid bring some lip gloss, powder, some money and a
spare pair of comfortable shoes in her bag for you. 7. Put a little emergency pack together that has deodorant wipes ,great for freshening you up but also great for getting stains out of your dress or his shirt!, needle and thread, perfume and plasters. 8. Ensure that you get some time alone with your new partner at some stage during the day. You certainly don’t want to be like ships passing in the night. 9. Spend time with your guests at the reception, Enjoy the fruits of your fervent planning! After the big day, 1. If possible leave it a day or two before you leave on honeymoon, you’ll have been so busy in the few days lead-
ing up to the day itself, that it’s often beneficial to have a few days to relax at home before having to get ready for a long haul flight. 2. Be prepared for the post wedding blues! Many Couples feel deflated after all the months of avid planning come to an end. Routine will settle in rather quickly and some do find it difficult to realise it’s all over. Perhaps plan a reunion weekend for family and friends, or keep a little box of wedding mementoes on your desk.
Most importantly, remember you are committing yourself to be with the one you love for the rest of your life, and that your wedding day is just one great day in a life full of happiness and love that you have to look forward to. Marriage is one of the most difficult but rewarding things you will ever do.
Article by www.firedropdesign.com Cathy designs wedding stationery for the savvy bride and much more, which are available to purchase through her online store at www.zazzle.co.uk/ cards_by_cathy* or directly from firedropdesign.com
The decision about whether to get married in your home country or hold your ceremony abroad is the key to all your wedding planning. This list of the pros and cons of getting married abroad should help you pinpoint what really matters to you and provide the foundations to help you start planning your wedding.
home. Although you do have greater transport costs, you are still likely to save money. Many hotels and package companies provide excellent value deals. Holding your wedding abroad can also be a lot less stressful. Many packages include a lot of the wedding co-ordination. There will usually be a lot fewer guests to organise.
The pros of getting married abroad You can combine your wedding abroad Choosing to get married abroad means with your honeymoon. the world is your oyster. The venues and locations are almost endless. The cons of getting married abroad Many couples choose to get married abroad to make sure they have great weather for their wedding which can seem like a huge bonus when you come from a country where the weather is less dependable, like Ireland.
One of the main things which puts couples of getting married abroad, and understandably, is that they are usually limited as to the number of guests they can invite. It is common to ask very close family and friends to join you for your marriage abroad, but beyond that it is a Believe it or not weddings abroad can be lot to ask other people to pay out and ofa lot cheaper than getting married at ten isn’t practical. Couples may feel
guilty about this. One thing to remember is that getting married abroad is an increasingly common choice which people are used to. Also, a popular way around this is to hold a party and/or blessing when you return home so that all your friends and family can be included in your celebration. By planning your wedding abroad from afar, you are less likely to be able to check out the venue beforehand and you may worry about things going wrong. If you do decide to marry abroad look out for testimonials from other couples who have married there. Also make sure that you keep in touch with a contact at your destination or hotel. They should be able to reassure you. Hopefully this has clarified some thoughts and allayed a few fears about getting married abroad. Time to start planning!
Sean & Karina’s Story Married in Las Vegas The best things about getting married abroad were that we only had to please ourselves. No one was going to argue with us over small details and it also allowed us a great deal of flexibility on the day as to what we did next. We went for Vegas because of the ease of getting married. They are experts at it and helped us with every detail. Of course the location might seem cheesy to some however where else could you stroke a dolphin, have a gondola ride and see white tigers all on our wedding day.
live band. Anyway I strongly recommend taking the plunge and going for your own personal wedding especially if it is your second marriage as was the case in our situation. From a fathers point of view if my own daughter's were getting married I would want to be there however I would respect their decision if they decided to do things there own way.
It was an amazing experience, the only negative aspect was not having family and friends around however in some ways we made up for it on our return as we had organised a party with a Sean and Karina De-Stress Magazine - Summer 2010 - Page 18
Jen Doyle designs and makes jewellery and hair accessories for all occasions, and specialises in bridal design. She has a wide range of wonderfully unique designs to choose from and is constantly evolving her collection of work. Jen's work was recently featured in the January 2010 issue of the Irish Brides magazine. Based in Co. Donegal, Jen takes her inspiration from nature and the wild Atlantic ocean scenary close to her home. Visits to the studio are always welcomed, but are by appointment only. “Buying a handmade makes a more thoughtful gift. The person who received a handmade gift gets a present that is one of a kind, well made with care, skill and craftsmanship that is generally missing from mass produced products. The person who gives handmade gifts has the satisfaction of knowing that they have supported an artist /crafter directly. Buying handmade helps us to reconnect to local and human sources of goods� - Jen Doyle Visit Jens website to learn more about her work and to view her collection of beautiful jewellery. Why not wear an unique and beautiful piece of jewellery to complete your Wedding day.... www.doylejewellerydesign.blogspot.com
preparation process and the wedding day itself. Know that whatever happens, you will be married at the end of the ceremony. Realize that sometimes the flub-ups are the most enjoyable things to remExpect stress: There is no inisce about. Know that way around the pressures spending more money does that are related to a wedding not insure perfection. Don't and it is unreasonable to ex"blast" friends and family pect nothing but peacefulness who make mistakes. If you and bliss leading up to the have children in the wedding wedding day. Expect it and it party, don't expect anything won't surprise you. It can even coming lose to perfechelp you to anticipate and tion. plan for problems. Be content: Be happy with Don't expect perfection: The what you can afford. Be philohigher your expectations, the sophical about how things greater the disappointments. turn out. Focus on what you High expectations lead to do have instead of what you greater stress, both in the don't.
Wedding Stress Tips
Don't try to please everyone: Everyone has a vision of what a wedding should be. There is no way in the world to reconcile all of these views. Be polite, but don't see it as your job to make everybody happy or to smooth over every conflict.
the other. Learn to say "no" and mean it.
Get premarital counseling: It is rather foolish to spend so much time on the preparation for a ceremony and reception that will be over in a few hours and ignore the relationship itself. Prepare for the Draw your boundaries: It is marriage, not just the cereokay to compromise on issues mony. that are not of high priority with you and your spouse to Don't neglect your spousebe, but on the essentials to-be: It is very easy to get so stand your ground. Let people wrapped up in the preparaknow when they are tramtions for the wedding that pling on your rights or taking time spent with your future too much of your time. Be as- spouse gets neglected. Consertive, not aggressive. When tinue to date and talk about setting boundaries with oththe future (after the wedding ers, try not to act out of anger. ceremony). Plan out what you want to tell
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