Strike Magazine Orlando Issue 04 by Strike Magazines

ISSUE 04 | IN TRANCE

ISSUE 04 STAFF LIST EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Hanna Chute

CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Alex Adey

EXTERNAL DIRECTOR

Claire Overstreet

CREATIVE DIRECTOR ASSISTANT

Noelle Espinal

EXTERNAL DIRECTOR ASSISTANT

Isabella Richko

CREATIVE DIRECTOR ASSISTANT

Claire Overstreet

EXTERNAL TEAMS PR DIRECTOR Jami Doolittle

PR ASSISTANT

Madison Goran Ashley Hassan Josh Arden Michael Alexakis Lucas Castro

FINANCE DIRECTOR

Alexander Morgan

FINANCE ASSISTANT Dylan Moreno Emihly Torres Mya Salazar Isabel Jacobsen Autumn Hamiliton Daniely Rivera-Martinez Marie Brooks

EVENT DIRECTOR

Alyssa Schroeder

EVENT ASSISTANT Brianna Fogarty Katrina Lashinger Daniela Kushch Nya Hearn

SOCIAL MEDIA DIRECTOR Erin Michelle Jones

CONTENT CURATOR Abigail Thurston Marah Hunt Nicholas Flood Calynne Thompson Donovan Butler

EDITORIAL TEAM WRITING DIRECTOR Peyton Boudreaux

STAFF WRITERS Gabby Macogay Nicholas Flood Jenna Weiss Ayanna Stark Isabella Straka Melissa Donovan Ashley Hassan Kristen Boxhorn Haley Johnston Farah Shah Ellie Nas

Grayson Keglovic

COPY EDITORS

Theo Skinner Kayla McCall Madeline Gonzalez

SOCIAL MEDIA GRAPHIC DESIGNER

Jillian Proudfoot Georgia Sanacore

BRAND AMBASSADOR

Claudia Orisakwe Larissa Kaewrasamee Isabelle Archer Elena Lara Sofia Aguayo Ariana Garcia-Fundora Aubrie Russo Lilli Kreisher Lydia Velasquez Mia Coltelli Jordan Wagner Gabrielle Bosse Riley Chaplick Mackenzie Logan Andrew Berger Jamie Sharp Kayleigh Dunn Elisa Ivanov Roxette Rios Kylie Carney Samantha Reynolds

CREATIVE TEAMS STYLING DIRECTOR Adina Frazier

STYLIST

Ani Ekanem Ellie Cabeza Niah Aleger Isabella Escudero

BEAUTY DIRECTOR

Ally Sullivan Katherine Polgar

MAKEUP ARTIST

Alyssa Góngora

ART ASSISTANT

PHOTOGRAPHER

Kelsey Bauch Regan Adre Carolina Ricardo Andrea Paradela Alyssa Ferraro Noelle Espinal

SET DESIGN DIRECTOR

SET DESIGN ASSISTANT

Berona Muro Jackson Ring Lena Neal Riley Karekos Kayden Vitale Braedon Walter

Natalie Plastina Donovan Butler Nathalia Beltran Ashlyn Buckman

ART DIRECTOR

Mia Marquez Ashley Ferguson

PHOTOGRAPHY DIRECTOR

Ashley Ferguson

Isa Maria Jones

CASTING DIRECTOR Dominic Durso

PROJECTIONS Livi Bonaventura

VIDEO/MEDIA TEAM PRODUCER Sarah Sullivan Ariela Ortiz

VIDEO/MEDIA DIRECTOR

Kylie Kuhn

HEAD OF VIDEOGRAPHY

Ashleigh Jachles

VIDEOGRAPHER

Daniel Botton Christian Casalduc Oliver Sulla

For the past 2 years, this magazine has been a medium for the delivery of creative storytelling through photos, fashion, and writing. It contains meaningful information and viewpoints on a wide range of issues that affect the local Orlando communities as well as Generation Z around the country. I am beyond grateful for the opportunity to run such an influential publication this year. With a year under my belt, I’ve been able to watch the community we’ve formed expand while also allowing me to grow individually. Each semester, Strike UCF, as well as myself, evolves into something new. When it comes to the future, I’m looking forward to seeing the new people, opportunities, and experiences Strike UCF has to bring. The talents and efforts of a larger number of people went into the creation of this issue. To begin, I’d like to express my gratitude to the past Editor-in-Chief ’s for not only paving the way but also for their dedication to Strike. To Claire and Alex, I am so grateful to have such passionate and talented people by my side. As for my incredible staff members , I am so proud of what you all accomplished in this issue. No matter how big or small your role may have seemed, I promise this issue would not be the success it is without every single one of you. When having to decide on this semester’s theme, Claire came to me with the idea of “In Trance”. It caught my attention at first, even though I had no idea what it would entail. It became evident as she refined the concept further. This theme would represent slipping into a trance that takes control of your thoughts and renders you entirely ignorant to the rest of the world. We found that a trance-like condition can be representative of both positive and negative experiences. Being unresponsive to external stimuli can either help you better understand yourself or make you ignorant of others. In this issue, I invite you to evaluate the upsides and downsides of each trance-like experience represented. Put on your 3-D glasses and enter your state of trance throughout this issue. Strike Out, Hanna Chute Editor-In-Chief

3 16

A wise woman once said “If you don’t care about your work, no one else will.” I can confidently say that Strike magazine is something I care so deeply about. There are nights where random ideas will pop into my head and I’ll spend the rest of my night figuring out how to make it happen. To be quite honest, I never stop thinking about what else we can do with Strike, and that’s how I know I was made to do this. Being in this position has allowed me to believe in myself more and explore my creativity. The concept of “In Trance” was once a random idea I spent all night thinking about and it’s now this issue’s theme. I couldn’t be more proud of our staff, everyone worked so hard to make this idea come to life. To my external teams, you guys grew so much this semester and made everything possible. Hanna and Alex you should be so proud of yourselves and the amazing publication you have built from the ground up. Claire Overstreet External Director

It has been a continued honor to be the Creative Director of Strike Magazine, overseeing the sheer talent and creative ideas flow from so many students who work relentlessly and with passion towards one common goal; the publication of the latest magazine. I have truly learned from each and every person that has contributed towards the essence of each magazine over the last four issues and I am so proud to see how far the content has come since the first semester. That said, this issue is bittersweet for me, not only because I’m proud of what we all have accomplished together, but knowing it is my last semester as Creative Director. I am confident in Hanna and Claire’s abilities, and they will continue to build upon the future chapter’s issue. Although the Creative Director role comes with many responsibilities and commitments, both the journey and end result are rewarding. I am forever grateful for the relationships and experiences I’ve made within strike and I hope every member feels the same way. Alex Adey Creative Director

4 17

5 78

IN TRANCE It seems like we are all stuck in a trance. A trance of perspectives, mindsets, and ways of life. A trance can take over your thoughts and make you completely oblivious to the rest of the world. Not just causing you to stop paying attention to what’s going on around you, but also forcing you to change your reality. In this issue, we explore different trance-like states that human beings can experience. Trance states can be induced by hyperfocusing on one mindset and becoming unresponsive to external forces. A trance can allow your brain to focus on things it normally wouldn’t pay attention to. However, falling too deep into a trance can result in ignorance of your physical existence. Trance states are a form of dissociating, which can sometimes be a good thing. Still, you should not use it as a means of escaping rather than genuinely live your life. As you go through this issue you will see the progression of multiple trance-like experiences. From someone being your muse to being ignorant to the world around you, most of us experience trance states to some extent. Put on your 3-D glasses and enter your state of half consciousness throughout this issue. We hope you don’t fall too deep in trance.

6 79

7 30

table of contents

8 31

Photo by Ashley Ferguson

Photos by Lena Neal

YOU’RE MY FAVORITE COLOR Haley Johnston

I never thought I’d be the person to fall in love. Maybe a small part of me didn’t even believe it was real. But that all changed the moment I laid eyes on you. There was music playing, something oldschool and classic, possibly Frank Sinatra. You looked across the room at me and I could see the colors of the music in your eyes. Those spectacular shades of green instantly became my favorite. I see you in the trees of the park, in the hue of the grass;the color green has been yours since I first saw your eyes. I think I stood there wordlessly for minutes on end, just wanting to memorize the stars I saw on your skin, the ringlets of your hair.I wanted it all to committed to memory if I never saw you again. You always tell people it was endearing, the way I was so obvious in my interest; that people never showed their cards like that these days. But you decided to put me out of my misery of looking for the first words to say by saying them yourself, “want to dance?” I laughed. We were in an Italian restaurant and no one was dancing. Silly me didn’t yet know that you love to dance in empty rooms, that it makes you feel like you’re in a romantic movie. Silly me didn’t know I would spend the rest of my life blushing and laughing my way through clumsy dances in non-dancing spaces.

13 Now, I get distracted by mannequins in window shops when they’re wearing your colors. Now, I smell your perfume on every train ride. Now, I feel those purple lightning strikes through every text you send me. Now, I am never alone.

I never planned on falling in love. But I never realized I was living in black and white until you began to color in my world.

I don’t know how long we danced in that Italian restaurant with the waitress and I walked you home that night. I don’t the cook watching us. remember the words we said. But I But I do know that holding you smells know I kissed your hand. I knew like vanilla. It looks like the first you were worth taking my time. I’ll step you take in cold ocean water in always remember the shade of brown summer. It feels like the first bite of your door was, it looked so perfect your favorite meal. Holding you feels with the hue of your dress. Even that like home. boring beige makes me smirk on my way I never wanted to fall in love. The idea to work now. of giving someone that much power to hurt you never sounded appealing. But when I did finally kiss you, But that was until I was loved by you. our third date when you convinced me that the park, with no music playing, was the perfect place to dance. I couldn’t go another second without knowing what you tasted like. You tasted like blue. Like perfect skies on summer days, like spring snow cones, like autumn sweaters, like winter wrapping paper. I knew you would taste like home, I just didn’t know home would be wherever I was with you.

I always tell people that you are my favorite color. The emerald of your eyes, the chocolate of your hair, the mustard of the dress you wore, the lavender of your nails. Colors just look different once they’re on you.

I see you in the violet of the sunsets, in the lilac of the flowers–the color purple has been yours since that very first dance.

But I just said, “why not?”– you grabbed my hand and I swear that’s what being electrocuted feels like. I saw purple waves of energy fly off our fingertips and I know you saw them too. I smiled harder and spun you around like those movies I didn’t yet know you’re obsessed with.

Photo by Ashley Ferguson

515

Photos by Ashley Ferguson

166

Photo by Lena Neal

617

IRON FIST IN A VELVET GLOVE Jenna Weiss

187

819

Photo by Ashley Ferguson

209

Photo by Lena Neal

21 12

Photo by Ashley Ferguson

22 13

823

Photo by Jackson Ring

249

hyper focused Tucked in the back corner of Baldwin Park, an aspiring artist sat in the grass with a blank tarp and cans of paint. As the cool breeze blew through the grass, the artist worked to create an interactive art piece that would be used to tell his life story. I sat and watched the artist paint the blank tarp and thought of one piece of advice that has always stuck with me: do what makes you happy. There is something extremely fulfilling about loving what you do and being completely immersed in it. Michael Scott painted in the corner of Baldwin Park and became the perfect example of this. I sat and watched him become consumed by his art. It almost seemed like he had entered a different world without having to go as far as his mind. A world where he was completely hyper-focused on what he was making. In his own pursuit of happiness, Scott decided to switch to what made him happy while he was halfway through his college career. Switching from Biomedical Sciences to Graphic Design was a change that his parents weren’t expecting, but Michael had to follow his passion for art and design. Being the son of immigrants from Trinidad and Tobago, Scott felt as if he had to choose between his parent’s happiness and his own when working towards his future career.

Grayson Keglovic

“Pressure is a privilege because that means that I have people that believe in me a lot,” Scott said. The beginning of his journey was accompanied by little support from his parents–but Scott believed in himself and had to do what he loved. As his brand grew, his parent’s support grew too. Four years ago he was bored in his University of Central Florida dorm room. A little boredom and creative freedom allowed Michael to give birth to a creative company that’s purpose is to grow with him. The eclectics of SWAYCA are what make it unique from other brands. The company started as a t-shirt business but quickly became an outlet to showcase multiple forms of art. Like us as humans, it’s not just one thing, it’s whatever you can make it to be, according to Scott. “It’s about who I am. It’s just art,” Scott said. “I focus on so many things my life is kind of sporadic. I’ll be 3-D modeling one day, I want to paint, I want to do something else like I don’t really focus on the t-shirts because that’s not the main thing of it.” The meaning behind the name SWAYCA is simple: there isn’t one. Scott said he wanted to use a word that didn’t exist when naming his brand to

Photos by Jackson Ring

“IT’S ABOUT WHO I AM. IT’S JUST ART”

Photos by Jackson Ring

27 12

prove his growth. SWAYCA is being defined as Scott defines himself. “It actually has no definition because it’s a word I literally made up and I’m trying to put the definition behind it,” Scott said. “It’s something fictitious that you can create and it hasn’t existed yet” This type of hyper focused-ness proves that being trapped in your head isn’t always a bad thing. When Scott’s paint pen hits his blank, reused tarp, he can see the world that is in his head. Flipped-faced characters float around in a cartoon world that is strongly influenced by Cartoon Network shows and the artistic techniques of Salvador Dali, the inventor of the famous flipped images. “I saw a painting one time and it was of a lake and if you flipped it upside down it was another lake and I was like holy fuck that changed my fucking world,” Scott said. “The perspective flip.” Being hyperfocused on his work comes naturally to Scott, most of the time without realization of the creative zone he puts himself in. He describes it as a tunnel vision-like effect where he blocks out the outside world that surrounds him. “When I’m involved in it, I kind of know exactly what I’m doing. I can almost see it if I concentrate very hard like I can see the drawing already,” Scott said. “You can’t talk to me. It’s hard to talk. I don’t know why, maybe I am really hyperfocused on it.” The creative process behind SWAYCA is based solely on Scott’s reactions. Reaction to his artistic decisions. Reaction to his life experiences. Reaction to the people he sees. Reaction to the world that is around him.

“It’s all reaction. That’s the best way to put my artwork: I don’t know where that line is going to end up. It starts from a line and then it ends up being a whole catastrophic hell shit-storm of just lines drawn and things that look like forms and shapes….It’s like a blueprint to make the impossible possible. The invisible into real. I try to draw everything I can.” The experiences that cause the butterfly effect of Scott’s reactions serve as one of his main creative inspirations. While his mother is his biggest inspiration, his life experiences also shape the art that he produces. Scott said he struggles with short-term memory, but if something impacts him, he can remember every single aspect of the experience and turn it into art. “It’s almost like everything I know could be in this drawing, just not finished. Like my life, it’s not finished yet.” In the future, Scott hopes to turn SWAYCA into something bigger than t-shirts. He said he can see the art of SWAYCA as a high-fashion brand that is displayed on a runway in New York or even a cartoon television show that airs on cable TV. SWAYCA is a brand that grows with its creator. Michael Scott doesn’t know what his company will do for him later in life but he knows it’s going to do something. SWAYCA is not finished yet and it won’t be anytime soon. Watch out for Michael Scott’s artistic world–it’s starting to leave his mind and become a reality.

28 13

CATEGORY 01

BONEHEAD FC

MATERIAL PLASTISOL INK COUNTRY USA PRICE $25 NOTES FUTBOL TAUGHT ME EVERYTHING I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT WINNING & LOSING/SACRIFICE & OPPORTUNITY/GLORY & FAILURE

MORPH STUDIOS X SWAYCA

MATERIAL PLASTISOL INK CHAMPION SHIRT

COUNTRY USA PRICE $40 NOTES COLLABORATION WITH @MORPHSTUDIOSHD

29 12

CATEGORY 02

CHOLORIDER X SWAYCA

MATERIAL PLASTISOL INK COUNTRY USA PRICE $30 NOTES COLLABORATION WITH @CHOLORIDER6969

RIDE AND DIE 3D

MATERIAL PLASTISOL INK COUNTRY USA PRICE $25 NOTES PART OF THE 3D SERIES THAT CAME WITH SPECIAL 3D GLASSES TO MAKE THE SHIRT POP OUT

30 13

326

Photos by Braedon Walter

342

NICHOLAS FLOOD

A click of the remote; really it was as simple as that. Sydney found herself criss-cross on her bedroom floor, a soft yellow blanket wrapped around her shoulders as her eyes focused in on the dark figures that were appearing on her screen. It was a show from the 1950’s and for some reason it was all that she was interested in, especially Elizabeth. She was beautiful and the star of the show. Even with the lack of color, it was easy to see her bright blonde poodle cut, crystalline eyes, and vivid red heart-shaped lips. Elizabeth had just dropped dinner all over the kitchen floor which sent the live studio into a fit of laughter. Sydney didn’t find it particularly funny but she could tell the audience loved it – loved her. Lizzie, as Sydney liked to call her, was just that type of person:someone to love. Sydney’s alarm blared in her ear and she jumped up. Somehow days had gone by and she was still on the floor, with Lizzie’s face smiling down at her from the TV set. The lights slowly flickered on in the bathroom and she squinted at her reflection in the mirror. Her dark hair was nearly matted on the side of her head and black circles drooped beneath her brown eyes. She leaned over to grab her toothbrush and she saw her hand– pale skin barely stretched over the bones in her fingers, and chipped nail polish hardly distracted from the gashes where she was constantly ripping apart her cuticles. She attempted her daily routine of brushing her teeth, tying up her hair; making the last-minute decision to not wash her face. She could hear a faint applause as she stepped back onto her stage. Action!

35 18

“Well, just another day in the life of – oh!” She had tripped, spilling her books all over the floor. “This is just like that nasty spill I took last night. Gosh aren’t I a klutz?” She could hear a crowd laughing, a blur of smiling faces cutting across the far wall of her bedroom as she gathered up her books. She had to run downstairs to catch the bus–the audience applauding as she just nearly made it on time. “This is probably the worst part of my day.I never get the seat I want.” Nearly everyone on the bus was staring at her, but she didn’t notice; All she could see was the laughing faces in the audience. A smile spread across her face as walked into school and saw her friend, Alex standing in the hallway by her locker. “Where have you been?” “W-what do you mean?” “I haven’t heard from you in like 3 days, Sydney, what’s going on?” “I..” “Listen Syd, I’m just worried about you. I know that things have been rough lately but you can’t just disappear like this, I’m here to help you just tell me what’s wrong.” Sydney looked at him as if he were a stranger. “n-no that’s not… what you’re supposed to say…why aren’t you following the script?” “What the hell are you talking about?” CUT! C-can we run that again? He doesn’t know his lines!” She looked out toward the film crew, two cameras pointed directly at them.

“I think you’ve really fucking lost it this time Sydney.” The audience let out a collective ‘ooh’ as Alex walked away. The rest of that day seemed to go by in a blur and until she got home Sydney had barely realized that any time had passed at all. She was still so hung up on what Alex said that she threw everything onto the floor; she screamed and grabbed fistfuls of her hair just pulling at anything to get her frustration out. Did he mean what he said? Had she lost it? Of course not! How could she have lost her mind when she had a crowd of people cheering for her day and night? She took a deep breath and took a bow, the audience erupted into cheers and screams; they were so loud. They drowned out anything else that she could’ve been thinking and that’s exactly what she needed and as they began to throw flowers at her – rose after rose falling to her feet.

“THEY LOVED HER, THEY REALLY REALLY LOVED HER” She began to cry while twirling around in the storm of petals that were covering her. She needed them just as much as they needed her if not more, and she wasn’t going to disappoint them. They loved her, they really really loved her. She was just that type of person – someone to admire, to fawn over… someone to love. The velvet curtains swung closed and Sydney fell into the pile of love and adoration that was at her feet. The next morning began as usual, with a

shower. The warm water hugged her as she washed the sleep off of her body. Sydney caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror as she stepped out. She sighed and her lips spread so naturally into a camera-ready smile. There she was. It was as if she had just stepped out of a photograph. Her beautiful blonde hair framed her face with loud curls nearly hiding her blue eyes. Her full, bright, red lips stood out against her pale skin. She leaned in and noticed that there were freckles splashed across the bridge of her nose. She reached out and her fingertips rested on the cool glass of the mirror. The blue tint of the lights made her face seem almost lifeless. She gently brushed over her reflection, a tear slipped down her cheek but her smile never faltered. Why would it? She had never been happier. “I see me. Do you see me?” Her voice echoed around the tiled walls. Her reflection merely stared at her. She looked down towards her hands, long fingers capped with beautiful blue nails and neat skin, with hardly any wrinkles and not a callus in sight. Thick blue veins ran down her wrist and disappeared beneath the ivory, they matched the blue of her eyes. The mirror was now foggy from her breath, she tried to wipe it away but could no longer see what she was looking for. She could only see a blurred outline of the stringy brown hair and dark eyes that she had hated for so long. Why hadn’t Lizzie been there? Her truest self...that’s exactly how she felt on the inside. Her closed fist hit the mirror and a crack splintered its way down the center of the glass.

Photo by Braedon Walter Sydney was no longer alone; reflections of herself splintered across the foggy glass and she looked at each of them, wondering where she stopped and Lizzie began but she couldn’t seem to find that line amongst the network of cracks breaking her apart. She decided not to go to school that day. She had never felt so alone, so in need of someone. Seeing herself like that, even through a cloudy haze was horrifying, she had never wanted to see that person again and she didn’t know how to keep her away for good. But of course they were there to console her. Her loving fans, some holding signs and photos, all of them cheering for her. As night fell, Sydney found herself once more on her bedroom floor, the studio lights making her sweat and the boom overhead catching every heaving

breath she took. The TV came on, and there was Elizabeth, beautiful as always. She crawled closer to the TV set, reached out and placed her fingertips onto the screen, the static making her skin feel fuzzy. Her eyes were drifting, her heavy breaths made the screen foggy, where had Elizabeth gone? “NO!” Sydney’s fist slammed into the TV and shards of Elizabeth flew all around the room. A gasp came from the audience and she looked out to a blur of surprised faces and murmuring voices. “Um, l-line?” She started to laugh, looking down at the mess she had made she couldn’t help but be a bit embarrassed. But the crowd wasn’t laughing, the studio was silent. In fact there was no one out in the audience, there never really was.

36 19

Photos by Riley Karekos

37 20

38 21

FINDING FRIENDS IN ALLTHE MADE-UP PLACES Melissa Donovan

It was the summer of 2015 when I discovered the wonder and aura of early 2000s teen dramas. It started with Gossip Girl, where I would binge at least five episodes a day. As the end of the summer approached, so did my binge. There was a point where I felt I was truly a part of the Upper East Side. Chuck, Blair, Serena, Nate, and even Dan felt like friends to me and I felt a deep hole in my heart when my daily meetings with them via the TV screen had come to the end. No matter how many episodes I would watch on repeat, nothing

could beat the feeling of watching my friends face the ups and downs that came with being a socialite in New York City for the first time. After Gossip Girl, I moved onto One Tree Hill, Gilmore Girls, and now my latest obsession, The O.C. The surge of social media has created a plethora of fan content available for people like me that get completely consumed by the show that they are watching. When I was not binging The O.C., I was watching Seth and Summer

Photo by Braedon Walter

“ there is Photo by Riley Karekos

nothing like the feeling of leaving people you have ” never met

Photo by Braedon Walter

TikTok compilations, reading articles on the cast’s life, and searching up videos on YouTube related to the drama.

entertainment media might be able to compensate for that lack of connection,” Bond said.

I was obsessed. Watching these shows and finding different ways to stay connected to my favorite characters gave me this warm fuzzy feeling, similar to one that I would get after spending time with my “real” friends and family.

Now there is so much more than fictional people for audiences to relate to. With the dawn of reality TV shows like Big Brother, Keeping Up With The Kardashians, and The Bachelor, viewers can find comfort in real people too.

I was in a parasocial relationship, a onesided bond where the audience feels a connection to a person or character, and I had a hard time connecting back to the “real world.” A 2020 study conducted by University of San Diego Associate Professor, Bradley Bond looked at how switching over to Zoom and streaming Netflix during peak COVID impacted people’s perceptions of friendship and social interactions in general. After surveying 200 people, he found that people who were spending more time with “fictional friends” than their “real-life” friends had grown a deeper emotional connection to the ones they’d see on the screen. Bond went on to say that having these parasocial relationships actually does more good than bad, as long as it doesn’t get to a point of “unhealthy attachment.” “In times where we might need emotional support or need to feel connected to others

I remember watching my first season of The Bachelor (Hannah Brown’s season) and I fell in love with Peter Weber, better known as Pilot Pete. Watching him on my screen every week made me so happy. I thought he was the sweetest man and definitely deserved Hannah’s hand in marriage. When she didn’t pick him, I was crushed. I think I actually cried. Then he became the bachelor and my view of him completely changed. I was so confused why my feelings for him changed, but it was important for me to realize that it is a TV show. At the end of the day, his being on contract meant that he was no different than a puppet on a string. Seeing ordinary people put in these highpressure situations of having two months to find your soulmate, or competing against your housemates is so stimulating for audiences. The environment they are in makes these scenarios seem more like games, and the way that producers spin it so viewers get the most entertaining version

can be so far from the truth. While this type of manipulation brings in viewership, it comes at the expense of contestants’ reputations. “When consumption of these narratives outweigh everyday experiences they can begin to shift our expectations of what is “real”. We need to make sure we have other orders for our emotion, and other ways to process the world so as to remember that these shows are “products” highly designed to capitalize on our understanding of nonmediated natural interactions,” Brendan Rooney, Assistant Professor at University College Dublin said in an interview with Ireland’s National Public Service Media, RTE. “If these shows start to make up the majority of what we know about interactions and relationships, then future shows need to be more extreme, more emotional, more outrageous, in order to achieve the same responses.” There is nothing like the feeling of leaving people you have never met. Saying goodbye to your favorite characters or reality TV stars is likeleaving friends from summer camp: you cherish the short time that you had together, but you know it’s not forever. With all the streaming platforms and people being more introverted amidst the pandemic, friends are always just a click away.

45 Photos by Ashley Ferguson

46 Photo by Jackson Ring

SHOOT 2

We live in different worlds, you and I. You can’t see it because you don’t want to. There’s no reason to doubt what you’ve been told or what you’ve learned. If you want validation it’s in print, on screens, in textbooks, in every position of power reassuring that you belong. You have been gifted with access that permeates every mundane process your life entails. The gory details of how you’ve acquired this privilege are glossed over and rewritten to obfuscate the truth: this gift came at the cost of the humanity of others, humanity that was stolen because they didn’t look like you. You have the luxury of ignoring the inequity that is central to being a person of color. You have been inoculated from the truth by a little blue pill that represents all you’ve ever known and nothing you care to learn. The world was created in your image, and education is an institution built to protect it. Instead of objective truths, history is curated to make the evolution of the white man a heroic epic of Homerian proportions. We are first taught of American bravery, defeating the British in the name of freedom, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. However, we are rarely ever reminded of our founding fathers’ hypocrisy: they owned African men, women, and children, and the nation’s wealth was funded by their torture. A study found that “none of the 5th grade United States history textbooks— even those exceeding 800 pages— examine[s] the role of racism in U.S history or even mention[s] the word ‘racism.’ Only two textbooks included the term discrimination,” ( Peterson). Acknowledging the existence of racism in an educational context would require an in-depth analysis of the socioeconomic repercussions of slavery and subsequently, white accountability for the oppression of millions of people descended from bondage. If you’ve never questioned why a country founded on slavery would ignore the effects it had on the social hierarchy of its citizens, you are part of the problem. Omitting evidence of wrongdoing to admonish guilt is just one way the blue pill shields you from the truth. Seeing through the matrix of privilege requires one core realization: your comfort is paramount to the suffering of others.

THERE CAN BE NO ADVANTAGE WITHOUT DISADVANTAGE; YOU CANNOT GET AHEAD WITHOUT LEAVING OTHERS BEHIND. The first thing you should know is there is no winning. The Margin is a land of clenched fists and high roads, of bit tongues and perseverance. There are no second chances, only first mistakes. Here, black and brown children pay for naivety and innocence with their lives. This is the only world I have ever known. A world where my cousin who was raised as my brother is in prison, where my uncle was murdered in cold blood just as he decided to change his life. A world where they are demonized, blamed even for their condition by the same people who idolize white drug dealers Fez and Ashtray every Sunday night on HBO’s Euphoria. The matrix is not without irony. The youngest of the blue pills thrive off their own perceived self-awareness, and yet, their quest for validation through digital self-image falls short of authenticity. But recognizing privilege is more than putting Black Lives Matter in the biographies of your social media accounts while actively following and supporting anti-black pseudo-celebrities. It is acknowledging your power over others and using it to challenge the system (instead of for views on TikTok). The conflation of genuine support for the movement with a need to be trendy subverts the value and significance of the voices of those who need to be heard. Discussions of racism and white privilege are easily written off as a distinctly American issue, though this is part of the illusion that attempts to hide centuries of colonization and imperialism in plain sight. When it comes to discrimination, the whole world’s a stage. To see this glitch in the simulation, we need only examine the rhetoric used in Russia’s attack on Ukraine compared to the conflict and occupation of Palestine, Iraq, Afghanistan, and countless other nations. There is no need for a magnifying glass, the media has been quite clear about what makes Ukrainian

47 refugees special: “Just to put it bluntly, These are not refugees from Syria, these are refugees from neighboring Ukraine… These are Christian, they’re white, they’re very similar…” said one reporter in a live broadcast from Poland (Singh, 2022). It would seem that global outrage is only warranted when the victims of war crimes are white, while the ideals of humanity are much more selective, ignoring black and brown people in equal or worse scenarios. On the micro-level, we see Africans in Ukraine being segregated and denied entry to trains that would lead them to safety at the Polish border. Alexander Samto Orah recounted his and his friends’ trek to the Polish border. Upon making it to the train, they were denied entry despite begging for their lives. It was only after the train had left that they jumped on and begged the conductor to open the door. When they boarded, Orah says “We were the only three Africans in that particular train. And the train was not full,” (Adams, Essamuah, Walters, Abdelkader, 2022). Here we see privilege and racism working in tandem at the expense of human lives for no reason other than self-preservation. The biggest illusion of the postmodern world is that racism is limited to the personal opinions of the narrow-minded instead of what it truly is: a testament to the power of the global status quo reinforced and perpetuated by centuries of cultured oppression cultivated to maintain and support white patriarchal dominance in all forms. There is no protection greater than the blue pill that grants only a select phenotype power in their ignorance. In the end, the choice is yours: you forfeit comfort and challenge your privilege and the world order, or you take the blue pill… this story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. It’s a hard pill to swallow.

THE BLUE PILL

Kayla McCall

Photo by Jackson Ring

4 49

50 Photos by Jackson Ring

51 We’ve all been in a situation where we’d rather fight off our emotions than face them head on. It’s natural to want to pretend everything is fine even if things seem to feel like they’re crumbling around you, but this can be draining.

52 During the initial COVID-19 lockdowns, celebrity culture caused a lot of frustration across the working class. Pictures of celebrities floating in their million-dollar pools outside their L.A. mansions captioned with messages to fans saying that all they had to do was ‘stay strong’ was defeating to say the least. Celebrity ignorance promotes a very selective and unrealistic lifestyle that many of us do not lead. It’s discouraging to see such a blatant disconnect and lack of empathy from the people we may admire most. Many influencers post with the expectation of everybody acting, looking and behaving like them, when in reality, a majority of people don’t have the privilege or access to experience life through the same filter. While there are exceptions to every rule, it seems a little too common for social media influencers to promote lifestyles of extravagance and trends that seem to look down upon those of us who aren’t able to follow suit. However, there’s a bit of toxic positivity inside all of us, and that’s nothing to be ashamed of. We’ve all been in a situation where we’d rather fight off our emotions than face them head on. It’s natural to want to pretend everything is fine even if things seem to feel like they’re crumbling around you, but this can be draining. There is nothing glamorous about lying in a mountain of pillows and unfolded laundry on your bedroom floor and sobbing it out - it sucks, plain and simple. But it’s real. It hurts. It happens. You’re allowed to feel those negative, grueling emotions. There’s no need to put on a brave face and play pretend. On the same note, it can be hard to battle these feelings alone. There are many resources available to find outside help and people to talk to if your emotions feel a bit much to take on by yourself. And that’s nothing to feel guilty about. Sometimes we all need a guiding hand to help us navigate through the difficulties of life; these feelings are challenging to express and navigate, but they can be conquered. Despite the beliefs of Abby Lee Miller, you don’t need to save the tears for your pillow. While her famous saying isn’t exactly toxic positivity as much as it is straight-up emotionally manipulative, these behaviors are two sides of the same coin. Toxic positivity dismantles the very idea that we are human beings capable of experiencing emotional highs and lows - stripping us of some of our largest and most humanizing vulnerabilities

Above Photo by Ashley Ferguson, Right Photo by Jackson Ring

YOU’RE ALLOWED TO FEEL THOSE NEGATIVE, GRUELING EMOTIONS. and casting a false narrative upon our livelihoods. A lot of the projected, performative positivity spewed online is done to save face. Nobody is going through life’s journey alone. Voice your concerns, your feelings, your frustrations. They are just as much a part of who we are and who we will become as anything else.

53 Photo by Jackson Ring

54 The ‘save your tears for your pillow’ mantra from Dance Moms stuck heavily with me as a child. It was something I’d heard time and time again growing up in the performing arts. While mental health is much less stigmatized now than it was just a few years ago, it’s still something that a lot of people tip-toe around, especially when they have an audience of people to please. Your own emotions aren’t considered important unless they contribute to your performance. Nowadays, everything seems like a performance through social media. The way we present ourselves to onlookers and potential friends is only a sliver of the part of ourselves that we know best.

YOUR OWN EMOTIONS AREN’T CONSIDERED IMPORTANT UNLESS THEY CONTRIBUTE TO YOUR PERFORMANCE. Recent influencer culture online has contributed heavily to this unsettling ‘everything’s fine’ mindset. The heavy disconnect between influencers and their followers has created this strange virtual divide where toxic positivity prevails. Toxic positivity is built upon a foundation of false assurances; an extreme misconception surrounding the human experience. As if we should be ashamed to identify feelings of sadness, frustration, anger - and that’s just not true. But avoiding this mindset is easier said than done. Sometimes you reach a point where it seems like all you can do is push away the emotions that are bubbling inside you, waiting to explode. If you act like they’re not there, they can’t hurt you, right? Not only is this behavior ingenuine, it’s invalidating. Willful ignorance is not bliss. It’s a falsehood; a suppressive trap.

55 Photo by Jackson Ring

Only a few people can afford the luxury of believing that everything is fine when the world around them is in disarray. Hypnotized by one’s self needs can be a trance invoked by ignorance.

57 I just stood there. Water dripped off my body as tears flooded my face. All I could hear was the stillness of my own breath. Time stood still. Until it started again. My mother lives on Palm Beach now, in a house I paid for. I’ll never forget how she cried the day I handed her the keys. There was this pride in her eyes I had never seen before. I vowed to give her the world. It didn’t just start, it flew away. I ran mad round the apartment that just minutes ago felt like home. Opening every drawer, turning over each couch cushion, where were the secrets hidden? And now I will give Rachel the world too. I am not a perfect man, but I am a good man. And I love her. I love her. Each empty dresser and kitchen cabinet was a sigh of relief but an intake of anxiety Until I found it: so simple, so cliche Why does it feel like I’m forgetting something? I always forget things. But Rachel will call if I left my lunch or my wallet. The note in the nightstand Did I clean after Saturday? Until next time, Macy. Macy. Macy. Who the fuck is Emily? I knew the glass was going to shatter.

CRACKED GLASS HALEY JOHNSTON

I knew the glass was going to shatter. Things never stay perfect forever. And Eric, Eric was always perfect. I never spent much time in the mirror. Just a quick tie straighten and hair brush and I am good to go, I never understood dwelling on one’s appearance. He kissed me goodbye this morning, just as he always has, and I went to shower. I am going to marry her. There’s something about Rachel, she has always felt safe. I hid my mother’s ring in my nightstand. She feels like the right choice. He’s always gone before I get out of the shower. And today, it seemed so innocent, so sweet, He drew a heart in the steam. It’s something so small, but made me smile so big. What makes someone a bad person? Until I saw the “-M” scrolled next to it. What’s wrong with wanting it all? I’ve always wanted it all. The best jobs, the hottest girls, the most expensive cars. My mother used to pull me close to her chest and promise one day she’d give me the world. I have the world now.

37 59

60 Photos by Lena Neal

61 Photo by Riley Karekos

Photo by Kayden Vitale

The psychiatrist administrating the inkblot test listens for the patient’s responses and analyzes the extent to which they are common or unique to their cognitive functioning. The goal is to see how and why a patient interprets an image the way they do. Today, the Rorschach test is very controversial, and there’s an argument as to whether or not the tests have any diagnostic value. Some researchers and doctors also may see the inkblot test as a form of pseudoscience. Even though the tests are meant to help read someone’s self-consciousness, it is only a minor tool used in diagnostics and some doctors compare it to “reading” tea leaves. The ‘correct’ answers to inkblots are often found on the internet, so the tests can be easily manipulated. Due to this, inkblots lack reliability. The nature of the test and its use of images to invoke emotional responses and diagnose serious mental illnesses calls to question: Who decides what is sensible? Who is to say that my seeing a tree where someone saw a dog is a cause for concern? How is it any different from seeing ice cream swirls in clouds and spelling my name out in stars? Pareidolia refers to the tendency for people to perceive patterns, images, and faces in otherwise random or meaningless occurrences. This phenomenon links our childhood fantasies to the more clinical analyses of our psyche. Finding meaning in the mundane is such a beautiful and distinct facet of humanity and what it means to be alive. The idea that our imagination and creative drive can be psychometrically examined and lead to our undoing is, I suppose, another part of what it means to be human.

“ Pareidolia refers to the tendency for people to perceive patterns, images, and faces in otherwise random or meaningless occurrence ”

Who needs the Rorschach test when you can scroll through Instagram and project your insecurities onto parasocial relationships you have with pseudocelebrities? There is a consistent biological urge to unwind and cleanse yourself of constant stimulation. When I feel lost, I find myself in the clouds, making stories in the mist just like I did when I was younger. It’s no wonder the latest trends are steeped in nostalgia and remnants of what once was. We are all fundamentally missing something we can’t quite seem to remember: our true selves.

AREIDOLIA PAREID

PAREIDOLIA ELLIE NASRALLAH

When I was a kid, I was a cloud watcher by day, and a constellation hunter by night. I loved finding shapes in the sky, it felt like a gift of art from the world. The human brain can find meaning in anything, but there seems to be a fine line between creativity and psychological projection. Whenever I cloud watch now, I always find myself thinking of inkblot tests. The ones you’ve seen on TV where a psychologist holds up a card and asks, “What do you see?” and then scribbles the response on their notepad. Cloud watching is silly and carefree, whereas inkblot tests are used in psychotherapy, yet these two things are so similar. How are these tests really any different from making lore out of stars and clouds in the sky? Can our imaginations run too wild?

“The inkblot test, or the rorschach test as it is called, reviews our subconscious through deciphering ink blotches and what they mean to us and represent.”

The inkblot test, or the Rorschach test as it is called, reviews our subconscious through deciphering ink blotches and what they mean to us and represent. Inkblots were hand-drawn by psychoanalyst Hermann Rorschach, who initially created them to help diagnose certain mental disorders. The function of inkblots is similar to Freud’s theory of dream interpretation; instead of dreams being analyzed to understand human emotions, patients are meant to project their emotions onto the inkblots. Here’s how it works: a series of ten inkblots (ranging from black and white to multi-colored) are shown to the patient to find certain answers.

64 Photo by Riley Karekos

Photo by Riley Karekos

65 Photo by Lena Neal

58 66

67 Photo by Braedon Walter

69 like. It will show you who you want to spend your time around and who you don’t. This is not something you can predict or prepare for. Death forced me to pick up the broken pieces of my mirror and rebuild it into an entirely new reflection.

DEATH FORCED ME TO PICK UP THE BROKEN PIECES OF MY MIRROR AND REBUILD IT INTO AN ENTIRELY NEW REFLECTION. Much like our upbringing, reflections are a basis of life. Looking inward and reflecting on who you are and who you surround yourself with is key to understanding your own life. The death of my mirror image demanded me to reflect on anything and everything. I no longer knew who stood in front of me in that mirror. This new reality of mine was not something I wanted, but it took one of the worst things that could possibly happen to me to realize that I was looking in the wrong mirror all my life. Over the past six months, I have learned to live on my own without my Dad’s guidance. I have started to look into a new mirror. I now define myself, rather than someone else influencing who I am. I am not the extroverted, always on the go, don’t stop working person I once was. I am not craving to be like someone else. I am learning to slow down, appreciate life, and figure out who I am. I am learning to look into my own reflection. Now I am me. And as time has passed, I really feel myself growing into a new person. I am beginning to live a life for myself and damn do I love it. No matter where I go in life or who I become, I know my Dad is looking back at me through my reflection and is proud of me for being me.

70 Photos by Berona Muro

begin to mold into individuals, creating our own thoughts and opinions, but even then, the influence of others continues to have a significant impact on us. A person is observed by others and given a mirror before being defined; “This is how we see you.”As I stared into my reflection I saw the involuntary image my upbringing made me see. Everyone saw me as someone that was just like my father. To the outside world, my mirror was so perfect I even started to believe it myself. There were times where I found myself conforming to the standard my father had set. If he told me to be confident in front of a crowd, I was. If he told me to fold his laundry, I did. From little things to big things I did what I was told to do. This began to shape my personality. And suddenly I found myself to be this outgoing and hard-working person

71 much like my Dad. My Dad began to define me. I was comfortable with who I was and thought that this personality of mine would stick around for the rest of my life. Then the unthinkable happened. My phone started to ring and for some reason I knew exactly what that phone call was going to be. My perfect mirror shattered into a billion broken pieces as I was filled with a feeling of emptiness I had never experienced before. My Dad had suddenly passed away. I had lost my mentor, my rock, and someone who I craved to be. I found myself lost, not knowing who I was. And it wasn’t until this very moment that I realized I really was a mirror image of my Dad. I once was a mirror image, but now I am me. Death will show you a lot of things. It will show you what you like and what you don’t

CLAIRE OVERSTREET As life goes on, we learn a lot about ourselves. We learn what we like and what we don’t like. We learn who we want to spend our time around and who we don’t. At the very basic level we learn how to walk, talk, read and write. But who teaches us these lessons from the very beginning? For most of us, it was our parents who created the foundation upon which we are supposed to live. From an early age I looked up to my Dad. He was a father and friend anyone would dream to have. He was someone who had the power

of influencing others, and his intimidating yet inviting personality is what got him through life. He was an entrepreneur who cared about setting an example for his kids, and always gave me the advice I was searching for. In my opinion, he truly had it all, and I craved what he had. Your upbringing, who raised you, your environment and who you look up to will have an impact on you for the rest of your life. But it is up to you to decide how you truly want to define yourself. As we age we

74 Photo by Berona Muro

COPYCAT KRISTEN BOXHORN

I do my makeup like you in the morning: cheek contour, curled lashes and draw on the nude lip you wore to school last week. I am not crazy! I’m just a girl wanting to be loved. I wear my hair like you slicked back and straight and slip into strappy heels that I normally would hate. I put on a dress I would never buy This must be what he likes. I take one last look in the mirror before I leave. What I see is both familiar and unfamiliar. I force a smile, pretending I’m happier this way. Knowing, This isn’t me. Imitation is the purest form of flattery Or so they say.

Photo by Berona Muro

46 76

77 Envy causes us to perceive someone else when trying to look at our own reflection. The disconnect to oneself results in taking the personality of someone you dream of being.

10 78

THANK YOU

To Hannah Kealy: Thank you for trusting us to bring your vision to life in Orlando. This is genuinely a once in a lifetime experience, and we are very grateful for your support. To Emma Oleck: Without your leadership, none of this would be possible. Thank you for always being someone we can turn to for advice.

MODELS Katie Pettit, Manuela Sierra, Michael Scott, Jorden Peace, Zulmaris Garcia, Patrick Ryan, Aaron Rey, Duane Reece, Adiel Barnes, Amy Lam, Jackson Lederman

80 About The Issue: Theme: Claire Overstreet Designer: Mia Marquez Cover Shoot: Photographers: Ashley Ferguson (front cover) Jackson Ring (back cover) Photo Editor: Ashley Ferguson Styling Director: Adina Frazier Set Design: Hanna Chute, Alex Adey Beauty: Katherine Polgar, Alyssa Góngora Designer: Ashley Ferguson

CREDITS Styling Assistants: Ani Ekanem, Ellie Cabeza, Niah Aleger, Isabella Escudero Set Design Director: Isa Maria Jones Set Design Assistants: Donovan Butler, Nathalia Beltran, Natalie Plastina, Ashlyn Buckman Beauty Directors: Alexandra Sullivan, Katherine Polgar Beauty Assistant: Alyssa Góngora Designers: Kelsey Bauch, Carolina Ricardo, Mia Marquez, Andrea Paradela

Editors Shoot: Photographer: Berona Muro Photo Editor: Berona Muro Beauty: Alexandra Sullivan, Katherine Polgar, Alyssa Góngora Designer: Regan Adre Hypnotic Beauty: Concept: Hanna Chute Photographers: Lena Neal, Ashley Ferguson Photo Editors: Lena Neal, Ashley Ferguson Styling Director: Adina Frazier Styling Assistants: Ani Ekanem, Ellie Cabeza, Niah Aleger, Isabella Escudero Set Design Director: Isa Maria Jones Set Design Assistants: Natalie Plastina, Donovan Butler Projections: Olivia Bonaventura Beauty Director: Alexandra Sullivan Beauty Assistant: Alyssa Góngora Designers: Andrea Paradela, Ashley Ferguson, Alyssa Ferraro, Regan Adre Iron Fist in a Velvet Glove by Jenna Weiss sources: https://unearnedwisdom.com Daniel, Aaron. “The 9 Archetypal Lovers: Seduction by Robert Greene Summary.” Aaron Daniel Films: Ontario Wedding Videography, Aaron Daniel Films: Ontario Wedding Videography, 13 June 2021, https://aarondanielfilms. com/blog/the-9 -archetypal-lovers-you-are-attracted-to. “Welcome to Unearned Wisdom.” Unearned Wisdom, 14 Dec. 2021, https://unearnedwisdom.com/. Hyper Focused: Concept: Hanna Chute, Alex Adey Photographers: Jackson Ring Photo Editor: Jackson Ring Set Design: Alex Adey, Hanna Chute Designers: Mia Marquez, Andrea Paradela, Regan Adre, Kelsey Bauch Stuck In The Screen: Concept: Claire Overstreet, Hanna Chute Photographers: Riley Karekos, Braedon Walters Photo Editor: Riley Karekos Styling Director: Adina Frazier

Mirror Image: Concept: Claire Overstreet Photographers: Berona Muro, Braedon Walters Photo Editor: Berona Muro, Braedon Walters Styling Director: Adina Frazier Styling Assistants: Ani Ekanem, Ellie Cabeza, Niah Aleger, Isabella Escudero Beauty Director: Alexandra Sullivan Beauty Assistant: Alyssa Góngora Designers: Regan Adre, Carolina Ricardo, Mia Marquez, Andrea Paradela Ink Blot: Concept: Hanna Chute Photographers: Kayden Vitale, Lena Neal, Riley Karekos, Photo Editor: Lena Neal Styling Director: Adina Frazier Styling Assistants: Ani Ekanem, Ellie Cabeza, Niah Aleger, Isabella Escudero Set Design Director: Isa Maria Jones Set Design Assistants: Natalie Plastina Beauty Directors: Alexandra Sullivan, Katherine Polgar Beauty Assistant: Alyssa Góngora Designers: Mia Marquez, Ashley Ferguson, Alyssa Ferraro, Noelle Espinal Pareidolia by Ellie Nas sources: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2017/feb/21/rorschach-testinkblots-history https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-the-rorschach-inkblottest-2795806 https://www.livescience.com/25448-pareidolia.html Ignorance Is Bliss: Concept: Hanna Chute, Claire Overstreet Photographers: Ashley Ferguson, Jackson Ring Photo Editor: Ashley Ferguson Styling Director: Adina Frazier Styling Assistants: Ani Ekanem, Ellie Cabeza, Niah Aleger, Isabella Escudero Set Design Director: Isa Maria Jones Set Design Assistants: Nathalia Beltran, Donovan Butler, Ashlyn Buckman, Natalie Plastina Beauty Directors: Alexandra Sullivan, Katherine Polgar Beauty Assistant: Alyssa Góngora Designers: Mia Marquez, Alyssa Ferraro, Kelsey Bauch, Ashley Ferguson

GO GIVE SALT N’ CITRUS BY TERI UNDERHILL A LISTEN TODAY ON SPOTIFY!

OR FIND OUT MORE AT teriunderhill.com/

LOVING OUR MAGAZINE? CHECK OUT OUR BLOG AT

STRIKEMAGAZINES.COM OR FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM

@STRIKEMAGAZINEORLANDO

STRIKE OUT

ORLANDO, FL