A magazine designed to influence the modern day woman from a Christian perspective. It is written to encourage, strengthen, bring resolve, and draw courage to her walk in life. Creating a fierce community of women while tackling real life issues.
Founder and President: Francis Fernandez Graphic Designer: Fina Florez
Contact SCW: Strong Courageous Women @scwlife SCW_Life www.SCWLife.com
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Letter from the Editor be experience. My simple prayer changed to not only be grateful for my health, family, and His provision but I have now added the people, things, and places we will encounter here. Our attitude towards situations is what will dictate the outcome of it. If we take on an attitude of gratitude, then we will be grateful in all circumstances. Therefore, as a mom I decided that every time my children would begin to complain about all we had left behind. I would explain to them that home is where mom, dad, and siblings are. If they mentioned they missed a certain dish like tacos (which are nowhere to be found here) I would say something like they have delicious brick oven pizza, homestyle pasta, and fresh produce we hand pick ourselves. Being grateful is a state of mind that we should embrace during this holiday season. This will help prepare the hearts and minds of those in our home and those who will soon sit around our table as we give thanks for 2017. Let’s give thanks to the Lord with all our hearts and share with others all that He has done for us this year!■ Connect with me on social media via Facebook at Strong and Courageous Women, @SCWLife on Instagram or @ SCW_Life on Twitter. I’ll be praying for you! Our theme for this edition is “Grateful” which is based on Psalm 91:1 which reads, “I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.” In the morning I try to be intentional to begin my day with a grateful heart. I look out the window in my bedroom and whisper this simple prayer. Lord, I thank you for my health, family, and your provision. It’s the simplest prayer I say but ironically the most important to me. You see we must make the choice to be grateful each day. We must be intentional about this. In our last edition themed “seasons” we discussed how they are necessary in our lives. At the time, I was personally experiencing an important one might even say life altering change of season. My family and I moved to South America with our savings to be part of an established ministry. We left everything behind and have settled in quite nicely. After our move the Lord really began to minister my heart about being grateful for all the new people, things, and places we would
Being grateful is a state of mind that we should embrace during this holiday season.” Page
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Contributors Ashley Jackson faith
Ashley Morgan Jackson is a Christian communicator who loves encouraging women in Christ to live and walk out what they believe and learn to stand up in their true identities. Find her @ashleymorganjackson.com
Chelsea Drinkard Being Single
A millennial with an Entrepreneurial spirit leading Christian Business Women’s Connection. Find her @chelseadrinkard.com
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Esther Volmar Marriage
Suzette Ladouceur motherhood
A devoted wife and mother who has a desire to share her heart, was inspired to create a YouTube Channel - Simply Esther where she enjoys sharing her passions and lifestyle with her global audience. Find her @ www.youtube.com/c/SimplyEsther
Her desire is to share her experiences, life lessons, and simple tips to inspire and build up women. Find her @ PurposefulMoms.com.
linda paige self-care
Faye Adams fitness
Linda Paige is a brand that empowers and equips women to get up, dress up and be a bold light on a hill. Find her @LindaPaige.com
Her greatest desire in life is to please the Lord, point others to Him, and bring Him honor. Find her @Purposefulmoms.com
Contributors Rachel Ward fashion
She has been in fashion for 20+ years. She owns Gemara’s Gems (Jewelry Distribution) and Rachel Gemara (an inspirational shirt line to empower and inspire women). Find her @ facebook.com/groups/gemarasgems/
Jessie Campbell Beauty
Founder of Wake Up and Makeup with Jessie she is passionate about Beauty. Find her @ HotMessJess.com
Martha Brangenberg Books
She works alongside her husband, as host on the iWork4Him radio program weekdays on WTBN AM 570 & 910. Their desire is to help listeners incorporate Christ in their workplace, wherever that workplace might be. Find her @ www.iWork4Him.com
Joy Morey Faith
She is a wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, friend, but most importantly, a Princess daughter of the King of kings! She hopes that her words will always be ones that build others up and encourage them to fulfill their destiny.
Karen Gillman faith
Her life work is devoted to helping others seek God and through Him realize and go after their hearts desires. Find her @charitychics.com
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Contents 10
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20 Our cover Montevideo, Uruguay Cover Photo By: SCW 6 SCWLife.com
Contents Life 8 Don’t Forget to Remember by Ashley Jackson 10 Happy Wife Happy Life by Esther Volmar 12 When Mom Forgets to Be Thankful by Suzette Ladouceur 14 The One Question by Chelsea Drinkard 16 Mining for the Silver Lining by Joy Morey 18 Operation Christmas Child by Izabella McMillon Well-Being 20 I Love My Body by Linda Paige 22 To Weigh or Not to Weigh by Faye Adams 24 Fall Fashion Trends by Rachel Ward 28 A Little Concealer Can Brighten Your Day by Jessie Campbell Leisure 30 Gratefulness Is a Massage to the Heart by Karen Gillman 32 Books to Fall in Love with by Martha Brangenberg
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Faith
Don’t Forget to
I
Remember By Ashley Jackson
n a society where we are constantly bombarded with what is wrong with both our society and with ourselves, a thankful heart is hard to cultivate. We think over repeatedly about how we have been wronged, offended, withheld from, neglected, and our view of our world is quickly shaded with a dull gray that is hard to escape from. Who can be trusted? Does anyone really care? Why is my life not as perfect and simple as hers? Why am I being left behind? Will my life ever change? Where is God in all of this? Like the leaves on the trees outside, one by one our heart sheds its hope, joy, peace and love. We find ways to hide and isolate, reject and become bitter. It feels safer that way, to keep the pain out. We keep our mind focused on all we lack and we dig ourselves into a pit we can’t seem to climb out of, yet we aren’t sure we would want to? All we ever see is the pain. In Exodus Moses lead a million people through a desert who knew a lot about what that felt like. They were scared and confused, thirsty, hungry and it didn’t take long for them to simply be fed up. Psalm 106 recounts the Israelites struggle to believe, in verse 10-13 it says “So he saved them from the hand of the foe and redeemed them from the power of the enemy. And the waters covered their adversaries; not one of them was left. THEN they believed his words; they sang his praise. But they soon forgot his works; they did not wait for his counsel.” How often has the Lord been faithful to us, good to us, provided for us, done the absolute impossible for us, yet we too “soon forget”? Too quickly we are back to taking matters into our own hands, setting up protections and clinging to attitudes we often feel we have every right to cling to. We let the offense, either real or imagined, run rampant in our minds. We focus on our lack, all the prayers left unanswered. In verses 24-25 it say “Then they despised the pleasant land, having no faith in his promise. They murmured in their tents, and did not obey the voice of the Lord.” The most shocking thing was that they were in fact in the pleasant land, but they couldn’t see it because all they could think about was all they lacked. They
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had forgotten how to remember. Instead they murmured in their tents; grumbling, complaining, whining, throwing a down right temper tantrum about how life was not fair. They reasoned going back to slavery was certainly better than this. We are not so different. It’s so easy to begin to despise the place the Lord has brought us and find fault when things don’t add up to us. The practice of gratitude is simply a conscious choice to remember. Maybe we will feel like it, most likely we won’t. It’s taking control of our minds and deciding, I will remember the good for a moment. It is a reminder from the Lord to stop focusing on all He has yet to do and instead choose to thank Him for all He has already done, all He is currently doing. It’s not a sappy sentiment we are forced to participate in because, for heaven’s sake it’s called “thanksgiving”. It’s a powerful choosing to walk in faith and remember the goodness of our God. Faith says, “even though I have yet to see my God move in my circumstances, I know He is good and He has always been faithful. I remember when…” and we began to list all the goodness He has already blessed us with. The simple act of choosing gratefulness, especially when we don’t feel like it, activates our faith again. It reminds us to look around at the beauty that surrounds us and that life and its joy is often in the smallest of things we refuse to notice when we are too busy licking our wounds. The belly laugh of your child, the way the wind blows your hair when you’re praying, the conversation with a friend who you know really gets you, the comforting touch of your spouse’s hand, or that first sip of your favorite coffee on a crisp autumn day. God is calling us to be “noticers”, to notice every good and perfect gift He has sent and continues to send. For every unanswered prayer and pain we carry, He has sent a blessing and a beauty, if we would just choose to take our thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ. We obey when we “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thess. 5:8) Not because He cares about the duty of thankfulness, but because He wants to help us see He is still working, and in fact has never stopped. Don’t forget to remember.■
Faith Photo by Studio 33 Photography
Like the leaves on the trees outside, one by one our heart sheds its hope, joy, peace and love. � Page
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Marriage
Happy Wife Happy Life By Esther Volmar
I took my spouse for granted.� Photo by Studio 33 Photography
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ime and time again I hear men and women laugh and joke about how a happy wife equals a happy life. But does it really? Though I understand why this may have gotten started and even remember myself as an unmarried, independent woman, quite selfishly feeling this way. I quickly realized after I got married, that my own marriage would not survive on just my own happiness. My husband and I wanted a fulfilling and joyful relationship that blossomed through the years. During our years of marriage, God has taught my husband and I how to nurture our relationship so we can enjoy our union and have a healthy and happy marriage. It’s not perfect but like with anything else you want to be successful with, consistency truly is key. Here are some truths that could help bring back excitement and joy in your own marriage. Let’s get our groove back! One key to always remember and honor is, ‘Your Spouse is Important’. It’s no secret that after some time your spouse becomes very familiar to you, they see your good they see your bad and you have little reason to impress them. However, though you can be vulnerable with them you should not lose sight of who they are in your life and that their happiness plays a crucial role in your successful marriage. In my early years of marriage, I took my spouse for granted. I didn’t know how to listen to him, how to make him feel special, how to show him that I was thinking about him. I would do all the things that I would appreciate as a recipient, but I didn’t really know how to tune into his love language. I would surprise him with gifts I thought were nice or restaurants I thought were great. But he would often look disappointed because he could tell that I had not chosen these things because of his interests but rather my own. He made it very easy, he was very clear about his likes and dislikes but for some reason it took a while for me to receive what he was saying. By God’s grace, I have learned how to listen to him, become more observant of his interests and focus on what is valuable to him. When I began doing these things, he felt acknowledged, he felt special and he knew that what was important to him was important to me. This leads me to my next truth, ‘Your Spouse Speaks Wisdom’. Many times, the people closest to us can say something and it can get dismissed, but a stranger can say the same thing and it sounds profound, almost revelatory. Why is that? I believe it has to do with familiarity and oftentimes we can miss the very wisdom our spouse is trying to speak into our lives. Remember, even Jesus could not perform many miracles in his own hometown. Don’t let familiarity cause you to dismiss great blessings in your life. There would be times my husband would make suggestions about how I could improve my YouTube content, or helpful tips to help with video sound/quality and I would literally ignore them. If I’m completely honest I don’t believe I even took time to hear what he had to say. I just assumed it was something I already knew. Then
Marriage months later I would have an issue and he would see me stumbling around for answers and mention to me some helpful tips. I remember being in awe of all the solutions he had and thinking, “what a lifesaver!”. He’d kindly remind me that he had been trying to tell me these very things only months earlier. Let’s take the time to really listen to our spouse, put our pride aside and give them our undivided attention. It will ultimately strengthen the bond that you share and let them know that they are important to you. This next one is a fun one, ‘Take Interest in What They Enjoy’. Trust me when I say watching chick flicks is not the only thing your husband enjoys doing with you. This one I have to admit has been challenging for me at times because my husband loves watching sports. But he loves when I am willing to sit with him and watch once in a while. He’s fair, he understands it’s not the most exciting thing for me and he doesn’t expect me to watch endless hours of sports non-stop. But showing up and taking an honest interest to try and enjoy what he enjoys keeps our marriage a happy one. Nowadays if I focus, I actually find myself enjoying watching basketball and football games with him. I’m with him and that’s all that really matters. I see that he and our 4-yr old son are also starting to bond over watching sports and even commentary and I can see they will one-day enjoy frequenting live games. I want to be able to spend time with them doing what they enjoy and starting now will ensure that even five or ten years from now we’ll be able to enjoy different activities as a family. Start now, it’s not too late. That brings me to my most rewarding truth, ‘Accept help it’s ok’. Women have a tendency to take control of the household tasks and responsibilities. It’s in our nature, God created us to be a help-mate for our husband. We’re the nurturers, the organizers of the home and sometimes that can make it difficult to let go and accept help. It’s not like it used to be when the man’s responsibility was always outside the home and the woman took care of everything inside the home. With changing times, husbands and wives share in the responsibilities of the home, caring for children together and spending more time together as a family. This is quite challenging for me because I like to have everything in its set place and my own way of organizing things. When my husband would ask to help, I used to constantly turn him down. But I realized that accepting help from him not only helps me, but it affirms him because he feels that I trust his ability to get the job done just as I trust myself. At the end of the day, if the dishes get washed and the laundry gets folded does it really matter what style or method was used to get it done? Let’s focus our energy on what really matters, let’s not worry and get carried away with the little things, they truly are just “little” things. To watch the full video and inspiration for this article, please visit this link! http://bit.ly/MarriageTruths.■ Page
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Motherhood
When Mom Forgets to Be Thankful By Suzette Ladouceur
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e trip over the same toy. We look at a hamper that never seems to
empty. We stand in front of a sink that fills faster than I can empty it. We taxi children from one destination to another. Are these familiar moments to you, too? As we move into the season of thankfulness and gratitude, it is easy to join the hundreds of others who will post a thankful thought each day until Thanksgiving… but what about the rest of the year? We forget to be thankful when the everyday demands of life pull us in every direction except to the One who has given us much to be thankful for. We allow the busyness of life to blur the beauty of right now as we longingly look towards the future of calm we anticipate. We drown out the sounds of voices calling our name with other noises which tend to be louder and more deafening than the sounds we are trying to run away from. And we forget… We forget to look to God with a grateful heart for children who call our name… because one day they will be grown and gone, and we will long to hear our name called by a little voice.
Photo by Studio 33 Photography
We forget to thank God for the child who plays with his toys for hours on end and uses his imagination to create incredible stories and adven-
Motherhood tures… because one day the toys will be put away for good as our children outgrow them and move into adulthood. We forget to be thankful for the abundance of clothes still hanging in our closet, giving us a chance to close the door to the laundry room for one more day… because one day our laundry load will shrink as our children move out on their own and begin doing their own laundry. We forget to be thankful for the full refrigerator and pantry that has filled our bellies and the bellies of our children while so many go hungry. We forget to thank God for what each dirty dish represents… growing children whom God has given us the privilege of providing for. We forget to thank God for the time spent in the car with our children where we are able to hear about their day and find out what is going on in their world… because one day our car rides will be much quieter and a bit longer and we travel to visit them and their families. This season of gratitude, I offer you a challenge. The next time an all too familiar moment brings a feeling of dissatisfaction, complaint, or unthankful spirit to the forefront of your emotions, stop, take a deep breath, and thank God for this very moment. Look for the beauty that God has hidden it. Gather the ones causing this moment in your life into your arms and cherish them. Close your eyes as you breathe a quick recitation of Psalm 9:1a, “I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart.” And be thankful for the gift of motherhood you have been given.■ Page
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Being Single
The
One Question By Chelsea Drinkard
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Photo by Studio 33 Photography
race yourself, the holidays are approaching, we know what that means: office, holiday and family get togethers. If you are reading this and single, I bet you can guess what the next question is because you have experienced the horror look you give when someone asks you. There is always one question that seems to be the topic of conversation every holiday, “How are you still single?” (Insert awkward silence).
mouth and while you try to fumble out a half decent response, you’re looking around for someone else to talk to.
Don’t get me wrong, this question usually comes from good intention and in efforts to encourage you is followed by phrases like: “You are such a catch.” “You have so much going for you.” “You are so beautiful.”
I understand the person is trying to be nice and make you feel better by the lack of bling on your finger or man to cuddle with when it’s cold, but every comment feels like another shovel of dirt into your single coffin. You find yourself thinking, “Can we please change the subject? Maybe if I keep eating spinach dip, they will stop talking to me?”
Then you painfully fake a smile but think to yourself, “What am I supposed to say? Wait, why am I still single? What’s wrong with me” Then you shove a heaping scoop of spinach dip in your
Have you experienced your own version of this exchange? In all seriousness, I know we dread this question but hear me out. Have you thought about “how are you still single?”
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Next, they try to sympathize and the back peddling begins. “Dating these days is so different and has to be difficult, I was lucky. I would introduce you to someone but honestly, you are too good for all the guys I know, they don’t deserve you.”
Being Single Here are just 4 simple categories we can fall into: • Ms. Desperate: “I just want to be loved and my worth is defined by my relationship status.” • Ms. Independent: Miss keep her distance. Miss never let a man help her off her throne. (Thanks to Kelly Clarkson for this smash hit song). • Ms. Waiting on the Lord: “I am supposed to pray, sit and wait for my husband.” (It sounds “Christian-like” but total misconception of the Bible). • Ms. Satisfied: “I am taking advantage of being single and enjoying this gift.” Do you fall into any of these? I used to be “Ms. Independent”. I didn’t recognize it but it wasn’t until I really started praying and the Holy Spirit showed me I was still single because I built a brick wall of protection around my heart. I was bitter and full of unforgiveness towards men. These two-combined created a nonverbal brick wall between any potential suitor. I walked around with a “get lost” sticker slapped on my forehead. When people asked me why I was still single, my response used to be, “I am focusing on myself” which can be a legitimate answer. In my case, it was hiding what was underneath. I had a heart issue and hid behind the mask of “I am focusing on myself” to cover up my pride and bitterness. This was just one of the “The Three Lies I Thought Were Keeping Me Safe” an article I wrote a few months ago. I believe there really can be something in our hearts from our past which can strain or even hinder our ability to date or marry. What do you say when people ask, “how are you still single?” • Do you hide behind a mask that makes you sound good but deep down it’s a lie? • Do you have past hurt from men you are holding onto? • Do you fear rejection of men or others? • Is your self worth wrapped in your relationship status? • Were you told to just pray and the Lord will bring you your husband? • Are you hiding behind your career or volunteering because it’s safe or trying to protect yourself from getting hurt? I believe if we aren’t hiding behind any masks and truly understood the gift of singleness, we could confidently answer this question and be satisfied with our response. If we don’t understand the purpose and all its benefits, we may find ourselves in situations feeling like the shoveling of dirt is piling up around us in our single coffin. The holidays are an easy time to be painfully aware of your singleness when it seems engagements and weddings are cover-
“Have you thought about ‘how are you still single?’” ing your social media, not having a “plus one” for parties, that crazy Aunt who tells you every year, “you aren’t getting any younger and not starting or sharing your own holiday traditions with that special someone. Remember, our Abba, Father can transform our hearts. We have His approval, so our value isn’t determined by our relationship status. I asked Him, “How am I still single?” He showed me. I realized, I am still single because, I haven’t made dating a priority. I am choosing to focus on other areas of my life. Now, I have learned to be satisfied. Sometimes I do wish I had the companionship when traveling or a new business venture but no matter my relationship status, my First Love will always be my Abba, Father. Go through the questions above and pray, ask your loving Father to search your heart and show you. I hope you won’t make the mistake like I did. I thought I didn’t have a problem, I was right for being Ms. Independent but I totally was deceived. If we draw near to our Father, He promises He will draw near to us, transforming our hearts and renewing our love. Abba, Father’s love has restored and renewed my heart and now I can confidently answer the question I used to dread, “How are you still single?” Last Fall, I wrote a blog called “Love in October” during the holiday season, check it out under the blog section at Chelseadrinkard.com for tips on making this holiday season your best yet!■ Page
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Faith
Mining for the
Silver Lining By Joy Morey
I realized that we were missing the spirit of the day.� Photo by Studio 33 Photography
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he air didn’t smell quite as crisp as we had hoped and the leaves were still green on the trees, but nevertheless, Thanksgiving was sneaking up on us! For this new-to-Florida family, finding enjoyment in the fall season was a struggle. The move had been a challenge as we adjusted to the weather, the financial stresses, and the aching homesick hearts. Instead of a large family gathering with a table full of turkey and all the trimmings, we were preparing for a small family dinner. Through a melancholy morning of preparations, I privately lamented all we were missing. The same feelings were reflected on my family’s faces. In a moment of clarity, I realized that we were missing the spirit of the day. We needed to rescue our attitudes; at that moment, inspiration hit! It was time for a new tradition! I found a clean glass jar and asked my son for three of his marbles, while my daughter found the carton of heavy whipping cream. Sitting in a circle, I acknowledged that this Thanksgiving was going to feel different for us, but we still had many things for which to be grateful. We poured the whipping cream in the jar, added the marbles and a sprinkle of salt and shook that jar with all we were worth as we talked about some of our blessings. When our arms got tired we’d take a break and my husband would add some extra shakes. When my aunt and uncle arrived just before dinner, they added their blessings to our list with a few shakes of their own. Dinner that day was served with our first batch of homemade Thankfulness butter and hearts filled with warmth and appreciation! As women and mothers, we have the unique privilege and responsibility to set the atmosphere of our homes. How we embrace each circumstance and challenge will be reflected in the faces and hearts of our family. One of my precious friends called me one day to let me know she was delayed. She and her kids were sitting on the side of the road with
Faith a flat tire. When I asked if they were okay, she told me, “Yes, we are talking about all the things we are thankful for while we wait for a ride!” What a powerful example to her children! Regardless of difficult circumstances, there are silver linings to be mined. Thankfulness short circuits poor attitudes, selfishness, entitlement, and complaining! It takes our mind off what is wrong and centers it on what is right! Thankfulness enables us to become the thermostat in our home, setting the mood or standard to what is positive, instead of just being the thermometer reflecting the circumstances. Thankfulness even ushers us into the presence of God (Psalm 100:4-5). We are not simply women, wives, or moms; we are trend-setters! We are trail blazers! We can lead the way in being purposefully positive, drawing out the good in others, and searching for the life in what appears to be a dead situation. One of my favorite Scriptures is Philippians 4:6-8. “Be anxious for nothing…” I don’t know about you, but that’s a tall order for me! However, this command (not suggestion!) is followed by instructions: ‘in everything (yes, every situation), with thanksgiving, make your request known to your Father!” It is then that His peace comes to set a guard over your heart and mind (will and emotions). But don’t stop reading there! The secret to maintaining that peace is found in verse 8… think about those things that are pure, right, lovely, and praiseworthy! Choose to think about the good report instead of putting the bad report on repeat in your head. Whether your outlook tends to be a cup half-filled or a cup half-empty one, you can still purposefully choose to set a standard of gratefulness in your home and family! As you celebrate all the blessings in every circumstance, joy will rise in your spirit and your faith will find its footing. Peace will invade your mind and your home. Our God is a faithful and trustworthy Father! His love never fails us!■ Page
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Featured Article
Operation
Paul reminded the church in Ephesus: “In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive’ ” (Acts 20:35). eceiving is an expression of admitted need and accepted dependency. At some points in our lives we have all been part of the category of “the weak” Paul describes. From time to time we have deep needs, and our lives might depend on the kindness of others. For many children around the world, deep needs are met through a project called Operation Christmas Child—the world’s largest Christmas project of its kind. Each year, Operation Christmas Child collects gift-filled shoeboxes filled with fun toys, school supplies and hygiene items, and delivers them to children affected by war, disease, disaster, poverty and famine. These children are in desperate need of love and hope. I am deeply passionate about this project because I was once one of these children in need.
Christmas R child
By Izabella McMillon 18 SCWLife.com
Featured Article Growing up in communist Romania, I was raised by two hardworking parents. They worked in a factory their entire lives to provide the very basic necessities for us. Food was scarce, but we managed. Our small, two-room apartment was our safe haven where mom and dad strategized daily on what food to put on the table or how to buy new shoes for us growing kids. Mom’s hands were often bleeding as she worked hard to wash our clothes in the sink, hoping to remove stains. My older brother was in charge of looking after me while mom and dad tirelessly worked in the factory from 6:30 a.m. to 6:30 p.m. every day. We quickly became independent and had to learn how to take care of ourselves. We spent many hours home alone, and one day, when I was seven years old, we found a hidden Bible in the floorboard of our apartment. Bibles were not permitted during communism—churches were forbidden and speaking the name of God out loud could easily become a death warrant—so the contents of this book were a mystery to us. Despite the potential harm that could come, we began to read and fall in love with its stories. God started working on my heart and my brother’s heart through this small Bible. When I was 11 years old, a classmate of mine invited me to a small underground church not far from our home. This is where I learned that the book we had been reading was a well-known book many people were reading around the world. My excitement grew stronger, and I was determined to learn every story. My pastor at this little underground church eventually discipled me and taught me how to pray. I always dreaded the cold and dark winters in Romania. Whenever it was dark outside we knew it was bedtime. The only exception to this was if there was snow on the ground. It was the perfect opportunity to pray. I prayed for snow for more than three months, but my prayer was not being answered. I was disappointed and wondered if all the stories in the Bible I read were true after all. My answer came in an unexpected way: a beautiful, colorfully wrapped shoebox. Within this box I found a snow globe that brought snow to life like never before. I understood through that little globe that God knows me and the desires of my heart. He knew that I was ready to give up on Him, but He was not ready to give up on me. On that day I learned that He is a God who answers prayers. His answers just sometimes look differently than what I imagine. For me He answered months of prayers in the form of a gift-filled shoebox. He became real to me on that day, and my life was changed forever. Today I live in Charlotte, North Carolina, with my husband Joel and two beautiful children, Kaleb (8) and Naomi Joy (5). We live in a comfortable little home with heat and air conditioning. The fridge and pantry are never completely empty. I have a washer and dryer that make my daily life a little easier. But
I am grateful that today my family and I get to give shoeboxes and have an opportunity to be a blessing to others.” these are things I do not take for granted. I want to give back the blessing I received through a gift-filled shoebox. Each year, we collect fun toys, hygiene items and school supplies for children in need. My kids love to pack color-coordinated boxes. Kaleb is a fan of packing yellow boxes with as many yellow items inside as possible, while Naomi Joy is a fan of purple. We’re planning to drop them off during Operation Christmas Child’s National Collection Week this year, Nov. 13 – 20. We spend time praying for the children who will receive them. We pray they will find the beauty of our Savior through the boxes we pack. We pray they will join The Greatest Journey discipleship program that is offered to shoebox recipients. Ultimately, we pray they will feel loved and not forgotten—just as I did as a young girl on a gloomy winter day. I am grateful that today my family and I get to give shoeboxes and have an opportunity to be a blessing to others. Since 1993, Operation Christmas Child has collected and delivered more than 146 million gift-filled shoeboxes to children in more than 160 countries and territories. This year, Operation Christmas Child hopes to collect enough shoebox gifts to reach another 12 million children. We are thankful to be a part of this life-changing project, and we are overwhelmed that we get to give! I don’t ever want to take that opportunity for granted. Today we can go and be a blessing!■ Page
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Self Care
I Lovemy W
By Linda Paige
hat goes through your mind as you read that heading? Do you agree with the statement, or are you like most women, finding yourself resisting the words and thinking it’s not true?
“As a man thinketh, so is he.” Proverbs 23:7.
Like many women, I have struggled with my body image most of my life. We grew up on perpetual minimum wage with the constant reminder “we can’t afford it”. So, from a very young age, I became worried that we would run out of food. This resulted in me secretly hoarding food in my bedroom and binge eating from childhood through my 40’s, establishing a very negative relationship with food. I thank my Father in heaven that of all the times I stuck my finger down my throat, my body just would not throw up the food I ate. My body refused to become bulimic or anorexic. It was this recent realization that has led to this article and this season of my life. The fact that God answered my prayers in 2013 by sending me a humble, powerful, faithful coach by the name of Dani Johnson who has taught me how to follow the fruit in my life to the root of my beliefs. With the help of my coach and mentor Dani (Texas), my mentor in food and nutrition MaryAnn Shearer (South Africa), and my thought life coach, Dr. Caroline Leaf (Texas), I embarked on a journey in 2016 to rip out the toxic roots that were blinding what I saw in the mirror. I started saying “I love my body” several times a day. Did I believe it at first? No! Did it feel right? Absolutely not! But did I KNOW in my heart and soul that those words were true and pure and noble? Oh, yes. And what followed was a powerful shift in mind, body and heart. I started recognizing that my body has won me school sports awards, run me through several charity races, survived an emergency appendicitis, multiple surgeries, and birthed 2 beautiful children. My body has endured my crash diets, alcohol abuse,
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Body
sugar shots and 16 hours-a-day crazy career years. My body is beyond amazing! So, I made the decision to edify my body every day, because I know that death and life are in the power of the tongue (Proverbs 18:21). What does any of this have to do with fashion? Well, beauty is an inside job. We are beautiful because our heavenly Father made us. He made us beautiful, therefore we ARE beautiful. Whether we believe it or not does not change that fact. BUT, our belief that we are ugly – too short, too stout, too tall, too white, too black – this impacts the calling on our lives, as well as the futures of our children. Your environment is everything. And because it is impossible to find your beauty in Prada, Gucci or Michael Kors 1 Peter 3:3 says, “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes”, we have to dress up from the inside out. I really love saying daily “I love my body”. Edifying my body has established a whole new relationship between us. I am relating to her like a real, living, breathing thing! As much as that is true, we usually remove the personality and heartbeat from our body, treating it like a shell. Your body is a holy temple that houses your heart and your spirit 1 Corinthians 6:19 says, “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own…”. So, since edifying and loving my body, I am enjoying the blessing of more dressing up! Of wearing that pair of jeans that I have not been able to squeeze into for years. Of finding my beauty from the One True Source of my identity, all of which is further fueling my passion for fashion! So I challenge and encourage you to join us and commit today to saying every day: “I LOVE MY BODY!” An attitude of gratitude can move mountains…and literally get you into those jeans!■
Self Care
We are beautiful because our heavenly Father made us.�
Photo by Studio 33 Photography Page
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Fitness To Weigh or Not to Weigh…
That is the Question S
By Faye Adams
o, you’ve read my previous articles. You’re ready to make the journey for yourself. You’re determined to lose weight. You have a goal in mind and a plan in place. You’re ready to get to work, and perhaps have even already started your journey. And yet, something along the way every now and then tends to throw a little monkey wrench into your mood… bringing you delight some days and a little frustration on others. It’s that wonderful little accountability instrument we call “the scale”. Considering the fluctuation between angst and joy this lovely electronic device brings, it begs the question… Is the scale your friend or your enemy? A. Yes, it is definitely a friend. B. No, it is clearly an enemy. C. Actually, it is both. If I’m assuming correctly, you most likely guessed the answer that I’ve personally chosen for this article, and if you chose option “C” as your answer, then you’d know the struggle I and many others have felt when it comes to trying to lose weight. No, I’m not a dietician or a fitness expert. I’m simply a wife and
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mother who has successfully journeyed through the weight-loss process and has her own personal views on the topic. So considering there are two sides to the scale, let’s check out the pros and cons of each to see why it meets both descriptions. Pros
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Having a Starting Point: While there are definitely going to be days when you won’t want to look at the scale, there are absolutely perks to watching your numbers. In weight-loss, knowing your “before” numbers is important. How will you ever know if you are making progress if you don’t know where you started? In the same way that growth and change in your child often go unnoticed on a day by day basis, so are the changes your body is making over time. The mirror doesn’t record your progress, so other tools must do this for you in order to help you measure your success. The scale, “before-and-after” photos, a body fat monitor, calipers, measuring tape, and a log are all wonderful tools to help you keep track of the changes and also boost your morale. Know your starting point and be proud of your progress.
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portant. The only problem with cheat meals is that more than likely, if you check the scale the next day you’re going to see the numbers rise. Water retention from extra carbs and even extra body fat can be the results. Something I’ve found from my own personal experience, though, is that if I get back to my plan and stick with it, my body will get right back on track with the desired weight-loss (or return me back to my level of maintenance, depending on my goal). If stepping on the scale the next day motivates you to avoid eating too many cheat meals, by all means, step on it the next day. If, on the other hand, it discourages you… my suggestion is that you simply get back to your plan and wait a few days before weighing in. Give yourself some grace and get the train moving again. There’s no need to get discouraged. You know the path to follow to achieve success. It’s just a matter of getting back to it.
Cons
Understanding Muscle versus Fat Weight: There is a distinct difference between a woman weighing 160 pounds and having 12% body fat versus another weighing 160 pounds and having 33% body fat. The first is definitely more lean and muscular and most likely much taller in height. The other is probably shorter and is obviously carrying more body fat. The scale is good tool for tracking your progress as long as you understand that it cannot monitor “all” of the progress you are making. The goal of weight-loss should primarily be to drop body fat not simply water weight. Actively working on your cardio and building muscle (which heightens your metabolism) through weightlifting will help support this. Thus, adding another measuring tool (a body fat monitor) to your collection of weight loss accountability companions will definitely help. You progress may not always be clearly tracked on a scale. So, be sure to check your body fat too.
Knowing When to Make Adjustments: Another benefit of monitoring your weight is to help you make adjustments when needed. Perhaps, the numbers aren’t moving after a few weeks… Maybe that’s an indication to change your diet and/or your workouts. Plateaus are inevitable. Our bodies were beautifully designed by God for survival. Once they get into a rhythm, they adjust, holding onto fat and weight to maintain things at a normal existence. That’s why it’s important to change things up every now and then, so that your body has to cooperate with the new plan. The scale can help you know when to make those important changes. Tracking Your Progress: While it’s never fun to look at the scale and see the numbers rise or plateau, you still want to know if you’re making progress, flat-lining, or losing ground in your fight for better health. From my own experience, I’ll admit, it can be easy to get “comfortable” with the progress you’ve made and forget all of the hard work it took to get you there. A late night binge here, some additional desserts there… “Of course, I couldn’t possibly go back to looking like my ‘before photo’!” You think to yourself. But then again, this verse of wisdom rings in your mind, “Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.” Galatians 6:7. While it is important to enjoy some fun every once in a while, using the numbers on the scale to remind you of the negative consequences that over-indulging can cause, will keep you accountable to the truth of reality.
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Keeping Your Sanity: If you’re one who loves watching the grass grow or paint dry, by all means, watch the scale daily. Truth be told, I’m not one of those people, and yet for some odd reason there are days when it seems that I am. It happens either when I am desperate to drop weight or after I’ve enjoyed a “cheat meal” and want to return to my maintenance level. I’ll find myself checking my weight sometimes consecutively morning after morning and feeling somewhat disappointed that more hasn’t come off. Be good to yourself, Ladies. Stick with the plan and give it time. Changes are happening! It’s just a process and one worth enduring with patience.
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Giving Yourself Some Grace: As mentioned in a previous SCW article, enjoying a cheat meal every now and then is im-
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Weighing in with Balance As much as we all want to see the numbers fall quickly, every moment you choose to stick with the process and say “no” to cravings and instant gratification, the more success you will see over time. My suggestion is that you weigh in twice a week or every four days, giving yourself time to make progress and also monitoring the success of your plan. Weigh in too much, and you may get discouraged. Weigh in too little, and you’ll miss the gains you are making. While the numbers on the scale are at times celebrated and at others dreaded, the important thing to remember along your journey is that victories happen day by day, and the numbers on the scale most definitely do not define your infinite worth. The scale is merely a tool, and it can be your friend if you balance its use with wisdom and grace.■ Page
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Fashion
Fall Fashion Trends
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By Rachel Ward
t’s fall y’all! Who’s already rockin’ their fall fashion? In Florida, we can finally feel the shift in the temperature. Lower temps mean pumpkin spice lattes, fall scented candles, boots and scarves. With Thanksgiving and Christmas on the horizon fall represents love, family and the birth of our Savior. It symbolizes a season of giving and gratefulness. With the busyness and chaos of the holidays, it’s important to slow down at times, pray and thank God for a heart full of gratitude. One thing I am eternally grateful for is fashion. I know that sounds shallow so please let me explain. I have been in love with fashion for as long as I can remember. Dating back to sixth grade all I wanted to wear was name brands such as Guess and Esprit {give me an “Amen” if you remember these brands and rocked them too?}. I later went on to work for Guess, Kenneth Cole and Lucky Brand, managing retail stores for 5 years in total. When I moved to Florida, I started peddling toe rings which eventually lead to a full-blown wholesale and retail distribution jewelry business. Here I am fifteen years later feeling beyond BLESSED and GRATEFUL for my company and my clients. Fashion has been the vessel God provided me with. For that, I’m forever grateful. Fall 2017 is here and I love fall fashion because it’s all about layering. You can dress in a basic shirt and jeans but then throw on a vest, scarf and some fun accessories. Just like that you pulled together a “look” that can go out into the world and shine light on everyone you encounter. Every season there are different trends. In fall 2016 the huge trend was chokers. That trend quickly died down and this season, Fall 2017, it’s all about tassels and feathers. Let’s delve deeper into these fall trends plus a few more we will be sure to see: Tassels Chokers are out and long necklaces are back in. Layering necklaces is still a trend but the biggest trend we will see is tassels. They will be on everything: necklaces, bracelets, earrings, scarves and purses. They will come in a variety of fabrics and
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metals in numerous different colors. Tassel accessories will add the perfect oomph to any outfit. Feathers The feather trend has already hit the streets of LA and NY and will eventually make waves across the county. Like tassels, they be on everything and will come in a variety of colors. They will be mixed with metals to create a boho chic vibe. Pearls Pearls are classic but this season we will see edgier pearl pieces that you will want to wear even if you’re not a “classic” dresser. Pearls are being produced layered, crystallized, gold foiled and just all around edgier, making the vibe trendier as opposed to classic. Earrings Bigger earrings are making a comeback this season. Last year we saw daintier earrings such as studs, ear cuffs and ear crawlers. Women following that trend had their ears adorned from top to bottom. This season we are seeing longer, chunkier earrings in a variety of colors with, you guessed it, dangling tassels and feathers. Fall 2017 earrings make enough of a statement that you can go sans necklace. Other than the aforementioned, natural stones are still trending and will carry us through the fall. So, don’t worry, you can still layer your arm with bracelets for the ultimate arm party! Of course, as the holidays grow nearer, we will start to see more bling in the accessory world. If you don’t buy but one accessory this season, buy a long tassel necklace. It will match everything in your closest and you will be right on trend. So, what are YOU grateful for this season? As previously mentioned, among other things, I’m grateful for fashion and the opportunity it brings for us to express ourselves, individually and uniquely. What are you waiting on?? Get dressed, throw on a tassel necklace and head out the door!■
Fashion
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Beauty
A Little Concealer Can Brighten Your Day By Jessie Campbell
Concealer is a game changer when it is applied correctly. It works wonders! Dark circles, age spots and blemishes don’t stand a chance. Everyone has those days where they look and feel sleep deprived. It’s okay! It gets the best of everyone! All you need is a little concealer to brighten your day. If you struggle with dark circles under your eye, concealer will become your new best friend. To highlight under your eye, draw an upside down triangle. This points the focus up towards the eye. Use a dabbing motion to blend in the concealer to avoid smearing it. You can set the concealer with a setting powder to avoid creasing. Concealer is magical and this is just one of the many tricks it offers! Next time you are sleep deprived, you’ll know exactly how to make yourself look wide-awake! It’s one of the many makeup products to be thankful for! 28 SCWLife.com
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Faith
Gratefulness Is a Massage to the Heart
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You see, I’m convinced that its impossible to feel grateful and annoyed at the same time.”
By Karen S. Gillman
ave you ever felt an annoyance towards some of the mundane tasks that you encounter throughout any given day? Dusting, picking up after the kids, folding laundry, grocery shopping, filling your vehicle with gasoline…and the list goes on. There is a word for that and it’s called ‘ingratitude’. It has been said that ingratitude is the most common sin. I know I can be guilty of it!
sible to feel grateful and annoyed at the same time. When you start to feel that nagging spirit of complaining coming on, do yourself a favor and give your heart a much-needed massage of gratefulness. Instead of allowing your mind to run away with thoughts of irritation, let your heart lead with gratefulness. Thank God daily and obey His command for us to go to Him in prayer with praise and thanksgiving.
Although it is a part of human nature, there are ways that you can avoid being one of the many that commit the sin of ingratitude.
For example, when I am dusting, instead of thinking of it as a boring chore, I run through a list of appreciation including thanking God for our home, for our furniture, for the memories made in our home and for a healthy body able to carry out the task. Instead of complaining about picking up after the kids, I ponder on the
I’m going to let you in on a little secret; I’ve found the cure for ingratitude. You see, I’m convinced that its impos-
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memories our kids made while playing with their toys, thanking God that they made it home safely as I pick their shoes up that they tossed off at the front door. When folding laundry, I let my thoughts go to thankfulness that we are able to buy new clothes for our healthy kids and their growing bodies. Count your blessings, not your worries. And remember Paul’s three commandments for true Christians: rejoice evermore, pray without ceasing and in everything give thanks. You should never run out of things to thank God for! Go to Him in prayer and continually thank Him for all the blessings He has provided you! Gratefulness is a choice. It’s a gift you give yourself. And, it looks beautiful on everyone.■
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Books
Books to Fall in Love With By Martha Brangenberg
Psalm 9:1, I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds. Imagine sitting around the Thanksgiving Table, the meal has been devoured and our stomachs are full. The conversation starts to slow and it’s time for Grandma’s traditional question. “Let’s go around the room and share something that we are grateful for.” My answer would have to include how grateful I am that God has gifted so many wonderful writers to share their story. The gift of research, documenting life experiences, and telling the Good News allow our libraries and bookstores to be full of options that can inspire us and bring us closer to our Heavenly Father. That is one thing I am grateful for!
Life: As my parents age: Reflections on Life, Love, and Change by Cynthia Ruchti In bite-sized chapters that a caregiver can squeeze in between appointments, one of my favorite authors writes a poetic message from her heart. Caring for our aging parents can be a time to truly “honor your father and mother.” Whether they are resisting help or you feel like you’re fighting the battle alone, the encouragement, poems, and scripture will help you capture the precious memories along the way.■
Business: For women only in the workplace: What you need to know about how men think at work by Shaunti Feldhahn While reading this book I experienced many “Aha” moments and underlined quite a few ideas to incorporate into my workday. In many ways, it is a 9-chapter coaching session. Knowing factually how men think is life changing, being able to apply that information to a more productive workplace is brilliant. Shaunti gives insights that can be game changers for women – especially her candor in Chapter 7 – “That Low-Cut Blouse Undercuts her Career”. Listen up women, we have much to learn!■
Devotions: 52 Weekly Devotions for Busy Families by Karen Whiting What family doesn’t feel busy? Well, now there’s a special devotional designed with the busy family in mind. Show your family that setting aside time to learn from God’s Word is a priority. Using the acrostic S-I-M-P-L-E and filled with many optional activities to drive impact, this devotion is sure to be a hit with your family and bringing you closer to God.■
Family: The Tech-wise Family: Everyday steps for putting technology in its Proper Place by Andy Crouch Running a home smoothly may include putting everything in its proper place. The author uses this illustration to help readers put technology in its proper place in our lives. One thing is for sure – it does not get there on its own. With new insights and research from Barna, this book can show us the cultural statistics and then offers us options to do better.■
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Biblr: She Reads Truth Bible Christian Standard Bible This movement started online and is now a group of women committed to reading God’s Word together daily. Their website and app. www.SheReadsTruth. com help with the daily commitment to reading the Bible. This Bible: She Reads Truth Bible includes many of the tools from the online community all in one Bible. With wide margins for journaling, and reading plans for every book of the Bible, this format is sure to become a favorite for many. ■
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