News 1-4

Page 1

STUDENT LIFE

THE INDEPENDENT NEWSPAPER OF WASHINGTON UNIVERSIT Y IN ST. LOUIS SINCE 1878 Campus sculptures, Taco Bell, course evals, ArtSci mail, Coca-Cola, Bon Appétit and the weather are up for debate in Forum. Page 6.

Cadenza bids a sad farewell to All Real Numbers. After three years, cartoonist David Freeman is setting down his pen. Page 8.

VOLUME 127, NO. 39

Swimming and diving makes a splash: this weekend, the team earned seven school records and seven NCAA qualifying times. Page 5.

Inside Cadenza: Our editors scored a first look at some of the Xbox 360’s hottest games. Page 8.

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 7, 2005

WWW.STUDLIFE.COM

Tulane transfers head back to New Orleans By Jessie Rothstein Contributing Reporter As the semester winds down and workloads pile up, Tulane students who have spent the past semester at Washington University are eager to head back to New Orleans and to engage in the city’s rebuilding efforts. Although many of these students have enjoyed their time spent at the University, they seem to have no reservations about returning to Tulane, excited by the rebuilding experiences to come. Looking back on the past few months, freshman Stephen Frapart said, “I met a whole bunch of nice kids, took a bunch of great classes…this semester was everything that I could have asked for.” Nonetheless, his initial considerations of remaining on this campus were permanently abandoned after he realized that “those experiences that I’ll be a part of at Tulane with the rebuilding efforts…will help me learn so much that I wouldn’t necessarily be able to learn here.” Jackie Singer, also a freshman, admitted that “I am going to be sad to leave Wash. U., there’s no question,” yet she’s excited fi nally to begin studying at the institution that she’s always wanted to attend. One especially positive aspect of her past semester in St. Louis is that she was able to forge friendships with

several other visiting students from Tulane that she will be able to carry with her back to New Orleans. Other Tulane transfers report an unsatisfactory semester spent at Washington University. Senior Andrea Dube also fi nds herself awaiting her return to Tulane after being relatively unimpressed with the University’s assistance during the transition period and the school’s more subdued social life. “As a Tulane student, and a senior, it’s been quite isolating here, and it seems as though all Tulane students have really stuck together,” she said. Although Dube notes that the University and Tulane are quite similar in terms of student body makeup and the academic scene, she’s noticed a marked difference in study habits. “While we are used to students in New Orleans rolling into an 8 a.m. class directly from the bar, all the students here have actually done all of the reading…and all of next week’s.” Differences such as these aside, issues surrounding tuition payments stand out as the most negative experience for all visiting students. While most of the schools around the country either allowed Tulane students to attend at no cost or admitted them on the condition that Tulane could keep the tuition money, Washington Univer-

sity required payment. Although visiting students at the University will not end up paying more than they would have at Tulane, due to Tulane’s promise that all payments from this semester will be credited towards their future semesters at Tulane, many students are still extremely angered by the University’s actions. As Frapart put it, “I understand that Wash. U. is a business and trying to make money, but in these circumstances you could be understanding and forgiving.” Singer agreed that this move “made me really mad, especially because Tulane really needs the money right now.” Dube pointed out that Tulane students will also face tuition hurdles when Tulane provides an extra semester in May and June, known as a “Lagniappe” semester. According to Dube, the visiting students at Washington University will not be qualified for Tulane’s offers regarding this semester, which will allow those who paid Tulane in the fall to attend this semester for free, and will grant $5,000 credit to Tulane graduate school for all seniors who paid in the fall. Many Tulane students are looking forward to joining the rebuilding efforts that they have heard about over the past few months. Administrators at Tulane have been

DAVID BRODY | STUDENT LIFE

Stephen Frapart was supposed to be a freshman at Tulane this fall. Instead, he has spent this semester living in Mudd House while enrolled in University College. keeping in constant contact with the students, informing them on what the school is doing to get ready for its reopening and even shooting

videos of the school and the city to provide proof. According to Frapart, “they’re making every effort possible to really try to keep

our class intact…it’s going to be so unique and special to be part of the Tulane class, what we’ve gone through and what we will go through.” Singer notes that in all of the Tulane president’s e-mails and speeches, the main focus has been on how the students will play a large role in the rebuilding of the city. “I’m sure it will be everything…from fundraising to actual rebuilding…My college experience is going to be a lot different than it would have been, but I’m excited,” she said. Dube agreed, saying that “the fact that pretty much all of the students are returning to a devastated city is so overwhelming.” Frapart also anticipated a revival of Tulanian camaraderie, noting, “[School spirit] will be so much more intensified and everyone will be more passionate.” This spirit is sure to persist even with the altered conditions that the circumstances pose. Dube’s apartment was completely destroyed in the flooding, so next semester she will be living on a cruise ship in the same water that consumed her home. Nonetheless, she sums up the Tulane student body’s sentiments as she states, “New Orleans is an extraordinary place, and while right now it is made up of rows of rotten refrigerators and moldy debris, I truly can’t wait to be part of the rebuilding effort.”

Transfers adjust to University’s academic setting By Sarah Kliff and Margy Levinson News Staff

DAVID HARTSTEIN | STUDENT LIFE

Going beyond the realm of music, Apple’s iPod has found its way into classrooms nationwide. In such classes, students have the ability to download the audio from class and listen to it at their convenience.

iPods in school: will the device revolutionize the classroom? By Helen Rhee Staff Reporter Apple’s iPod mp3 players have already attracted millions of users for their ease of use and ability to make music accessible anywhere. Now, iPods are venturing into the classroom. At universities nationwide, students and the professors are choosing to use the iPod, the latest portable digital music player, as part of their teaching. This interest follows the “podcasting” trend, in which digital audio recordings are broadcast over the Internet, allowing students to download them at the click of a button. Apple Computer, Inc., the creator of iPod, has raved about its product’s ability to make learning accessible and convenient for students. University professors can easily upload versions of their recorded lectures online. They can create files using familiar software programs such as Quicktime Pro 7. Then, the files are ready to

be published online for “podcast,” a word conglomerated from the words “broadcast” and “iPod.” On the company’s site, Apple calls podcasting a means to free “learning from constraints of the physical classroom.” At Washington University, students can access the video version of some science courses online. But currently, the University offers no means for students to use iPods to download their lectures online. Matt Arthur, director of Residential Technology Services, said it is technologically feasible to post lectures online at the University and review them via iPod. Jan Weller, assistant vice chancellor of network library technology, said, however, that it would be up to each professor to decide whether or not to incorporate iPods into his or her classroom. Currently, the University does not officially endorse the use of the iPod in the classroom. John Bleeke, associate pro-

fessor of chemistry, said that since video online lectures provide both the visual and audio content of original lectures, the iPod, which mainly stores audio formats, may not be as useful for the students. “I don’t think the audio version would be very helpful to the students,” said Bleeke. “We mostly use the blackboard during the lecture, so if you don’t have the visual, I don’t think you can get much out of it.” Bleeke also said that allowing students to view lectures online has not decreased student attendance in the classroom. Yet other prestigious universities such as Stanford and Duke are already using the podcasting technology to broadcast large classroom lectures to students. At Stanford University, students can only access the recordings of the lectures after one month of the actual lecture. Stanford set the limit as a means to prevent the students from using the

device as a replacement for attending actual lectures in the classroom. Duke University has hosted various events, including podcasting symposiums, to discuss various ethical and technological issues surrounding the practice. As a part of the Duke Digital Initiative, Duke university distributed over 1,600 20 GB iPod devices, equipped with Belkin Voice recorders, to entering first-year students in August of last year. The fall 2005 course listings at Duke indicate that a broad range of professors are using the device. At the end-of-the-year evaluations, it was suggested that over 48 courses include iPod as part of their course curriculum. The evaluation suggested that the engineering students found benefits in iPod’s ability to playback the previous lectures. Nevertheless, they found that sometimes, recordings were not of sufficient quality to replace the live lecture.

Senior Hilary Blaker transferred to Washington University two years ago, unhappy with the educational environment at Columbia University in New York City. “I didn’t fi nd it academically adequate,” said Blaker. “The city is too busy and too expensive for a college student.” Sophomore Emily Niespodziewanski, a transfer student from the College of William and Mary, gave a simple reason for switching schools. “Everything here is better,” she said. Blaker and Niespodziewanski are among an increasing number of students transferring to schools different from their original choice, according to a recent New York Times article. While students come seeking new academic opportunities, some fi nd a new university a difficult place to take on indepth research and the academic opportunities available to four-year students. An annual report by the National Survey of Student Engagement found that transfer students typically become less engaged in research projects with their professors. Warming up to Washington University The 100-150 transfer students arriving at the University each year receive services to acclimate them to the University. Nanette Tarbouni, director of undergraduate admissions, said in an e-mail that the orientation office runs an orientation program for transfer students in both spring and fall semesters. “It is always our goal to make every new student to Washington University feel welcome,” said Tarbouni. Niespodziewanski attended one of those orientations

last year. “They did a lot of get-toknow-each-other programs. It was nice to be part of a group—it was better than being thrown into a matrix of people who already knew each other,” said Niespodziewanski. According to Niespodziewanski, one of the University’s nice touches in orienting transfers was the presence of transfer students as advisors. “Our peer advisors can share their positive experiences, which helps a lot,” she said. Niespodziewanski did fi nd some things difficult about being a fi rst-year sophomore. “Orientation was better here [than at William and Mary], but I didn’t get a library tour—I’m working on getting that,” she noted. Students also make academic adjustments when arriving on campus. “Most transfer students have similar problems as freshmen, different workloads, and adjusting to a new culture,” said Dean Molly McBurney, who coordinates peer advising and other orientation programs. “A lot of them worry about [studying abroad], but it’s defi nitely possible, just have to plan ahead. Summer study-abroad [programs] are a great option.” According to McBurney, the most common things that transfer students worry about are clusters. She said, “It’s more of a concern rather than actually [a problem]. [Transfer students are] generally right on track.” The ability to study abroad also presents a challenge for students attempting to fulfi ll their new university’s requirements. “It’s easier if [transfer students] come in as sophomores; juniors are trickier. However it depends on a lot

See TRANSFERS, page 3


2 STUDENT LIFE | NEWS

Senior News Editor / Sarah Kliff / news@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

STUDENT LIFE One Brookings Drive #1039 #42 Women’s Building St. Louis, MO 63130-4899

Briefs

News: (314) 935-5995 Advertising: (314) 935-6713 Fax: (314) 935-5938 E-mail: editor@studlife.com www.studlife.com Copyright 2005 Editor in Chief: Margaret Bauer Associate Editor: Liz Neukirch Managing Editor: David Tabor Senior News Editor: Sarah Kliff Senior Forum Editor: Molly Antos Senior Cadenza Editor: Laura Vilines Senior Scene Editor: Sarah Baicker Senior Sports Editor: Justin Davidson Senior Photo Editor: David Brody Senior Graphics Editor: Brian Sotak News Editors: Laura Geggel, Brad Nelson Contributing Editor: Mandy Silver Forum Editors: Zach Goodwin, Daniel Milstein, Jeff Stepp, Matt Shapiro Cadenza Editors: Adam Summerville, Jordan Deam, Robbie Gross Scene Editors: Kristin McGrath, Sarah Klein Sports Editor: Joe Ciolli Photo Editors: David Hartstein, Pam Buzzetta, Oliver Hulland Online Editor: Dan Daranciang Copy Editors: Allie McKay, Nina Perlman, Kelly Donahue, Erin Fults, Rebecca Emshwiller, hannah draper, Julian Beattie, Mallory Wilder Designers: Ellen Lo, Laura McLean, Anna Dinndorf, Andy Gavinski, Jamie Reed, Elizabeth Kaufman, Jonathan Kim

CAMPUS

NATIONAL

Structural engineer investigates hole in Eads

Undercover police to patrol parties at Colby College Colby College in Waterville, Maine will soon have undercover cops in attendance at student parties to combat a campus surge in underage drinking this past weekend. Over Friday and Saturday night, the local police force arrested five Colby students and gave judicial summonses to many others. According to the Morning Sentential, a lo-

Enrollment of black students on the rise A study released yesterday by the Journal of Blacks in Higher Education found that the enrollment of black students at high- ranked universities and liberal arts colleges has seen an almost 10 percent increase since 1994. Among na-

General Manager: Andrew O’Dell Copyright 2005 Washington University Student Media, Inc. (WUSMI). Student Life is the financially and editorially independent, student-run newspaper serving the Washington University community. First copy of each publication is free; all additional copies are 50 cents. Subscriptions may be purchased for $80.00 by calling (314) 935-6713. Student Life is a publication of WUSMI and does not necessarily represent, in whole or in part, the views of the Washington University administration, faculty or students. All Student Life articles, photos and graphics are the property of WUSMI and may not be reproduced or published without the express written consent of the General Manager. Pictures and graphics printed in Student Life are available for purchase; e-mail editor@ studlife.com for more information. Student Life reserves the right to edit all submissions for style, grammar, length and accuracy. The intent of submissions will not be altered. Student Life reserves the right not to publish all submissions. If you’d like to place an ad, please contact the Advertising Department at (314) 935-6713. If you wish to report an error or request a clarification, e-mail editor@studlife.com.

cal Maine paper, police cite an increased number of hospital visits, arrests and summons for possession of alcohol by minors over the past semester as reasons behind their new covert operation. Police will sit in parked cars watching Colby students coming and going, as well as go in plainclothes to house parties at off-campus locations.

DAVID HARTSTEIN | STUDENT LIFE

The kind of patchwork seen in the north wall of Eads Hall may become increasingly necessary as buildings on campus continue to age. The University has hired a structural engineer to determine why there’s a gaping hole in the exterior of Eads Hall. With the engineer working on the job, University officials expect the problem to be solved by the end of the week. “Originally we thought it [water leaking] was a problem with the stone,” said Steve Rackers, manager of

capital projects for the University. “It took a while to get a clear understanding, but now we know it is a steel problem.” Now officials believe the seeping water is rusting the metal behind the stone exterior. “We spent a lot of time trying to determine the problem,” said Ralph Thaman, the associate vice

chancellor of facilities planning and management. Rackers said there are some more problematic areas on Eads that will be addressed next summer. “We expect this to happen as buildings continue to age,” Rackers said. “Eads is an old building.”

-Alison Curran

tional universities, the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, the University of Virginia, and Stanford University had the highest numbers of entering black freshman, all hovering around 10 percent of their freshman classes.

Dental student suspended for comments on blog A dental student at Marquette University in Milwaukee, Wisc., has been suspended after a fellow student complained about comments he posted on a blog, according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. Along with the 22-yearold’s student’s thoughts about drinking and video games, the blog contains comments about his professors and fellow students, including “an [expletive] of a teacher” and students with

“intellectual maturity of a 3year-old,” the Journal Sentinel reported. After appearing before a committee of professors, administrators, and students, the student was found “guilty of professional misconduct in violation of the dental school’s Code of Ethics and Professional Conduct.” In addition to being suspended for the remainder of the academic year, he must repeat his fall semester.


Senior News Editor / Sarah Kliff / news@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

STUDENT LIFE | NEWS

Controversial student financial aid changes pass in U.S. Senate By Josh Hantz Contributing Reporter A controversial $2.7 billion Senate plan aiming to make financial aid more affordable passed last month, lowering origination and processing fees for student loans. The plan also funnels $1.7 billion to Gulf coast schools affected by this fall’s hurricanes. The plan is part of a much larger bill trying to cut the national deficit, which currently stands at $1.6 trillion. The plan’s opponents argue that if lenders have to

pay more to the government under this plan, they will charge higher interest rates to students, which could offset the reduced fees. Some fear that students may even be worse off. “It could hurt students, but it would be indirectly,” said Bill Witbrodt, director of Student Financial Services at Washington University. “It impacts students everywhere of every type.” Origination fees are those paid upfront to a lender to establish a loan, and the bill lowers them from three to two percent. The University,

though, pays no origination fees because of its banking relationships. But Witbrodt still doesn’t approve of the plan. “I’m against any legislation that diminishes the possibility of providing excess to kids,” he said. “The focus should be on helping students get to college and succeed in college.” Witbrodt cites other concerns raised by the new legislation. “Reauthorization has been going on for years,” he said. “It should have happened two years ago but

didn’t because of things like the war and the deficit. Also, during no reauthorization before has Congress been charged with cuts for these programs.” Other aspects of the overall bill include ceasing the funding of Perkins loans, which affects most University students on financial aid, and increasing the ceiling of interest rates on PLUS loans. Witbrodt is not the only one against these changes. “There’s a lot of lobbying against the bill from student organizations and parent organizations,” said Wit-

brodt. The bill also cuts part of Medicare and Medicaid, and proposes to open a new part of Alaska to oil drilling. The White House opposes these cuts and may even veto the bill because of them. Most Democrats and some Republicans are against it as well, so necessary changes will be made before it is voted on again. If the bill passes through the House of Representatives as well, it will cut an estimated $39 billion, or two percent, off the federal deficit over five years.

3

TRANSFERS v FROM PAGE 1 of factors:major, coursework, pre-reqs,” said Warren Davis, an assistant dean and Academic coordinator, regarding study abroad. Another concern is transferring credits. According to McBurney, each department has its own requirements, and it’s up to the department when it comes to credits and prerequisites. Overall, Niespodziewanski is satisfied with her experience in transferring to the University. “Everything here is the same [or] better. All my credits transferred, and I have no setbacks. I have no problems with graduation requirements,” she said. From the first day on campus to final projects While the University’s admissions office takes measures to welcome and integrate students, the 2005 National Survey of Student Engagement found that in general, “transfer students participated in fewer educationally enriching activities.” Blaker found her transfer status presented hurdles when she began pursuing a thesis project. “I was desperately searching for someone who would manage my thesis project,” said Blaker, who is currently writing her thesis in the environmental studies department. “I only knew two professors, who either said they were too busy or their research didn’t relate enough to my research. I’ve been relatively behind.” When two professors told Blaker they could not advise her because they did not know enough about her subject matter, she ended up working with an advisor spending the semester in Canada. She has only been able to meet with him twice this semester. Assistant Biology Professor Doug Chalker oversees student researchers in his lab. He said that student initiative, rather than time on campus, determines their ability to become involved in research projects. In fact, Chalker’s fi rst student researcher was a transfer. According to Chalker, the student sought out the opportunity for himself by contacting several professors, which he suggests is how any student should go about fi nding a research position. “Summer is a good time [for people] who need to do research,” said Chalker. He also noted that many students arrive at the University with a background in research from high school, “but we are willing to train.” According to Chalker, there is also no limitation on research based on level in school, “but at least by the end of junior year” students should be able to take part in research. Chalker supervises students at all class levels. He said that what matters most in selecting student researchers is not their time at the University but “mostly commitment to showing up and being trainable.” The English department is currently taking steps to revise its program to make it more academically engaging for transfer students. “We are also developing a Writing 2 course for people who internally want to go on from Writing 1,” said Lawton. “It is a good option for some transfer students, and opportunity to build on what they have already done on a more advanced level.” “We’ve work very hard to improve Writing 1, but there is always room for improvement” said David Lawton, chair of the English department. “[There have been] huge strides in the last few years.” While according to Lawton, transfer students submit a portfolio, some are still required to take the Writing 1 course. “It’s done on a case-by-case basis,” said Lawton. “[We look at] what they have done, and try to be flexible and see if it’s equivalent to [required] courses.” As the English department attempts to alleviate difficulties for transfer students, Blaker overcomes the obstacles she faced with her thesis. Blaker has spent the semester researching environmental degredation and the human health hazards that result from both the production and consumption of factory-farmed animals. “My twist on it is now industrial farming of animals has managed to evade direct legislation,” said Blaker. “I think honestly the idea of a senior thesis, exploring a subject matter that’s interesting to you, that you want to derive conclusions from, and that you’re extremely inquisitive about is so extremely valuable,” she said.


4 STUDENT LIFE | NEWS

Senior News Editor / Sarah Kliff / news@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

POLICE BEAT Tuesday, Nov. 29 1:07 p.m. LARCENYTHEFT—LAB SCIENCES BUILDING—Unknown persons removed three Shure wireless microphones and an AMX audio-visual control unit from the lecture hall at 300 Lab Sciences. Occured between Nov. 28 at 1 p.m. and 10 a.m. on Nov. 29. Loss approximately $4,800.00 Disposition: Under investigation. 4:36 p.m. ACCIDENTAL INJURY—SMALL GROUP—Employee reported a chair broke that he sat in, causing him to fall. No injury reported. Disposition: Cleared. Wednesday, Nov. 30 10:56 a.m. LARCENYTHEFT—WOHL CENTER —Housekeeping manager reported a theft of money from an employee’s purse. $70 was taken from the victim’s purse inside a locked black metal cabinet. No sign of forced entry. Theft occurred between 8:15 and 9:45 a.m. Disposition: Pending. a.m.

LARCENY-

1:10 p.m. SPILL—MCDONNELL HALL—A very small chemical spill occurred in Mc Donnell Hall. Hazmat team was notified and procedures for clean-up were followed. Disposition: Cleared. 4:14 p.m. LARCENY-THEFT —EADS HALL—Four wireless microphones were stolen from Louderman and Rebstock between Nov. 28 and Nov. 30. Disposition: Under investigation. Thursday, Dec. 1 11:01 p.m. MOTOR VEHICLE THEFT—PARKING LOT #10—Victim reported that he parked his secured vehicle on the north side of Lot No. 10 at 7:50 p.m. and found it missing at 11:30 p.m. A search of the area was conducted without locating the vehicle. Disposition: Pending.

Friday, Dec. 2 7:39 a.m. PROPERTY DAMAGE—SMALL GROUP #3—Unknown parties attempted to gain entry to the Bon AppÊtit store area by pulling the security fence loose from the floor lock receptacle. Disposition: Under investigation. 2:14 p.m. ACCIDENT AUTO —MILLBROOK GARAGE— Two-car accident. One driver backing from a parking space struck another passing vehicle. No injuries, drivers exchanged information. Disposition: Cleared. 11:57 p.m. ALARM—KAPPA SIGMA—False fire alarm sounded during a social gathering. House president contacted. Disposition: Referred to JA. Saturday, Dec. 3 1:23 p.m. ARTICLE —WOHL CENTER—A student reports that she lost her cell phone when she dropped same into the toilet and flushed. Efforts to retrieve the item by facilities were unsuccessful. Disposition: Cleared.

1:33 p.m. LARCENYTHEFT —SIGMA ALPHA MU—Victim reported the theft of her mobile phone and wallet containing various forms of ID from her coat pocket. Disposition: Pending.

STUDENT LIFE IS NOW ON AOL INSTANT MESSENGER!

Sunday, Dec. 4 1:16 a.m. ADMINISTRAT I V E—U N DESIGNAT E D AREA OFF CAMPUS—Roommate problems. Referred to housing. Disposition: Cleared.

Now you can send us comments, tips, story ideas, and more via AIM. Our new screenname will be online 24/7 during the semester—just add “StudLife Editorsâ€? to your buddy list to instantly get in touch with us in the ofďŹ ce.

Monday, Dec. 5 9:13 a.m. PARKING VIOLATION—PARKING LOT #31— Transportation discovered a silver BMW displaying a lost/ stolen parking permit. Vehicle was towed to Hartman’s towing. Disposition: Cleared. 5:43 p.m. LARCENYTHEFT—DAUTEN DORM— Cell phone stolen while at a party. Disposition: Pending.

Student Life: Your student newspaper

ˆ City Coffeehouse Creperie European cafe, specialty breakfast, luncheon and dessert crepes (prepared with white flour or 100% Buckwheat organic flour), homemade pastries, sandwiches, salads and soups. ?QI ?@MSR MSP APCNC AMDDCC AJS@Q

#SW ECR RFC RF DPCC .ML 'PG ?K NK 4?R 4SL ?K NK

L @PCLRUMMB AJ?WRML KM $*5:

Get top dollar for your books at the Washington University Campus Store. Enter to win $10,000 AND get 20% off your ** next purchase!

EVE ENSLER, THE CREATOR OF

“THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES�

IS COMING TO ST. LOUIS - EXPOSING EVEN MORE

Photos: Joan Marcus & Gabrielle Reverea

11:05

THEFT—ELIOT HALL—Unknown person(s) took a Sony data projector from the ceiling of the classroom at 213 Eliot hall. Item valued at $5,000; time of occurence between Nov. 23 and Nov. 29. Disposition: Under investigation.

SEE EVE

LIVE!

ON SALE

NOW!

T H E G O O D B O DY. C O M

January 3-8 • Edison Theatre

*Current market value applies. **See store for details.

6445 Forsyth (Wash U) Tickets at the Edison Box Office (thru Dec. 22) & MetroTix. presented by 314-534-1111 or metrotix.com Groups 20+ Save! 314-535-2900 $20 Student Ticket • All Performances! Edison Box Office • Day of Show Only • 2 Hours Before Curtain Cash Only • Present Student ID • Limited Availability


Senior Sports Editor / Justin Davidson / sports@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

SPORTS

STUDENT LIFE | SPORTS

5

IN BRIEF: The Washington University men’s swimming and diving team won the Wheaton College Invitational on Saturday, while the women took home third place. Combined, the men and women earned seven school records, seven automatic qualifying times, and 11 provisional qualifying times to the NCAA Championships in March.

Swimming and diving breaks The ‘perfect’ school records at Wheaton poker style: your own By Justin Davidson Senior Sports Editor

The Washington University swimming and diving teams took on the challenge of the Wheaton College Invitational on Saturday in Wheaton, Ill. with poise and a determination to show what they are made of. The men took home first place in a field of nine teams, while the women came away with a third-place showing. It was a day where several University swimmers made the history books, breaking school records and qualifying for the NCAA Championships. Winning with 742.5 total points, the men broke three school records and earned three automatic qualifying times for the Nationals. Seniors Eric Triebe and Michael Slavik led their squad to victory, pacing the field in a number of their events. Triebe won the 50-yard freestyle in 20.73 seconds, with teammate Slavik

clocking a second place fi nish just 0.03 seconds behind him. Triebe earned an NCAA “B” cut, while Slavik registered an “A” cut with his time of 20.68 in the preliminaries. The day didn’t end early for the duo, as Slavik also won the 200-yard freestyle, clocking a 1:40.38 time in the preliminaries, breaking the University’s school record and earning him an automatic qualification for the NCAA Championships. Once again, Slavik fi nished closely behind Triebe, as he earned a second place fi nish and NCAA “A” cut with his time of 1:40.68. The men’s team as a whole found success in medley and relay events as well. Triebe and Slavik joined forces for the 200-medley relay, which won the event with a time of 1:32.75, garnering them an NCAA “B” cut. Other individuals stepped up the effort as well. Freshman standout and breaststroke specialist Julian Beattie registered

an NCAA provisional qualifying time in the 200-yard breaststroke with a time of 2:07.80. Freshman Kevin Lackey also provisionally qualified with a time of 4:09.82 in the 400-yard individual medley. The University women, who have been trying to claw their way back from early season struggles, made an impressive showing with their third-place fi nish. They, too, had a number of swimmers post NCAA cuts and qualify for the NCAA Championships. Sophomore standout Meredith Nordbrock earned an automatic bid to the NCAA Championships with her time of 58.31 in the 100-yard backstroke, and also led off the 200-medley relay squad (1:47.46) and anchored the 400free relay (3:34.76), good for an NCAA “B” cut. Senior Jenny Scott, who has been excellent for the Bears this season, took first place in the 200-yard freestyle, clocking an NCAA automatic-qualifying

time of 1:53.37. Freshman Kelly Kano earned two NCAA “B” cuts with her performances in the 1650 freestyle (17:34.07), which was a half a second away from the school record, and the 200yard medley relay (1:47.46). In all, the men’s and women’s squads racked up seven school records, seven automatic qualifying times, and 11 provisional qualifying times to the NCAA Championships over the weekend. The swimming and diving teams have the next month off to prepare for their upcoming battle with Lindenwood University at home on Jan. 18. The Wheaton Invitational and their upcoming races will prove to be good warm-ups for the NCAA Championships, which will be held in Minneapolis, Minn., in March. Until then, the Bears must continue to work on their progress as a team and keep on showing the field their ability and desire to win.

The top five college football bowls By Scott Kaufman-Ross Sports Reporter 5. Arizona State vs. Rutgers Insight Bowl—Phoenix, Arizona Try to ignore my New Jersey bias here, but when the Rutgers Scarlet Knights are playing in a bowl game, it’s an absolute must-watch. This team has been one of the laughingstocks of college football for the past decade and a half, and this season, in a weak Big East conference, managed to pull off a 7-4 record. Rutgers had victories over big-name teams, too, knocking off both Pittsburgh and Syracuse en route to their fi rst bowl bid since 1978. The Sun Devils had a somewhat disappointing 2005 campaign. A promising season turned into five losses, albeit one of them was a great effort against a tough LSU team. The Sun Devils boast a highpowered offense, led by star wide receiver Derek Hagan, who totaled 1,113 yards and 8 touchdowns this year. The game is in Phoenix, which is an advantage to the Sun Devils—they will be a big favorite, but don’t count out Greg Schiano’s mighty Rutgers squad. 4. Texas Tech vs. Alabama SBC Cotton Bowl—Dallas, Texas Alabama’s dream season came to an abrupt halt with two straight losses, but they still earned a trip to Dallas to play in the Cotton Bowl. Neither of these teams is particularly strong, but what makes this such an intriguing game is the match-up when Texas Tech is on offense. The Red Raiders fi nished the season with the fourth-ranked scoring offense in the nation and

the top passing attack, led by QB Cody Hodges. The Crimson Tide counter with the secondranked defense, allowing just 10.7 points per game, as well as the top-ranked scoring defense. Something has to give as these two impressive units collide, and should make for a very entertaining show. It will also be interesting when the Tide have the ball; an offense that can’t move the ball versus a defense who can’t stop anyone. Should be a fun one. 3. Miami vs. LSU Chick-Fil-A Peach Bowl—Atlanta, Georgia Two teams who probably should have won their respective conferences will have to settle for a great match-up on Dec. 30 in Atlanta. After beating Virginia Tech last month, Miami seemed destined for the Orange Bowl, but a home loss to Georgia Tech handed the Hokies back the ACC Coastal division and the Hurricanes settled for third in the ACC. LSU lands here after a disappointing loss in the SEC Championship Game to Georgia, forfeiting their ticket to the Sugar Bowl. Both teams have terrific defenses (Miami ranks third and LSU fi fth) and have terrific young quarterbacks in Kyle Wright and JaMarcus Russell, respectively. A great match-up between two great teams should produce a very entertaining game, however disappointed the teams are to be there. 2. Ohio State vs. Notre Dame Tostitos Fiesta Bowl—Tempe, Arizona The Fighting Irish’s incredible run lands them in the BCS, and earns them a date with the Ohio State Buckeyes, fresh off their victory in the Big House a few weeks ago.

Notre Dame enters amongst some controversy, with many claiming Oregon deserves to be in Tempe instead, but a near-upset of USC and national popularity got the Irish the bid. Irish QB Brady Quinn and receiver Jeff Samardzija, who have hooked up for 15 touchdown passes this season, along with running back Darius Walker lead a potent Irish offense against an Ohio State team that ranks fourth in total defense. The Buckeyes, whose only losses in the season came to No. 2 Texas and No. 3 Penn State, fi nished the season strong and have found new confidence in their QB Troy Smith. Notre Dame has yet to face a tough test since the Trojans came to town, so it should be interesting to see how head coach Charlie Weis handles Jim Tressel’s bunch. 1. USC vs. Texas The Rose Bowl presented by Citi—Pasadena, California In what might be the most anticipated National Championship game ever, the Rose Bowl pits the only two unbeatens against each other. USC and Texas have gone wire to wire as No. 1 and No. 2 all season long, as the BCS fi nally produces a non-controversial National Championship game. The Trojans have won two consecutive titles behind last year’s Heisman winner QB Matt Leinart, and are looking to make history with a third. This year’s Heisman favorite, USC RB Reggie Bush, makes the Trojans offense as dangerous as ever, as the Trojans seem to be able to score at will. The defense has struggled at times, but despite a few close calls, the Trojans put together another incredible year, and have won 34 straight games overall. The Longhorns come in with the

nation’s top scoring offense, averaging over 50 points per game, including a 70-3 rout over Colorado in the Big XII Championship game last week. Mack Brown and his squad fi nally got the monkey off their back and beat Oklahoma, as well as everyone else on their schedule with their balanced offensive and defensive attack. QB Vince Young is a Heisman candidate and can beat a team with any combination of his strong arm, incredible speed and power running the football. The Longhorns also have an established ground game led by RB Selman Young, and many believe the Longhorns are the more complete team. Leinart and his Trojans are tough to outscore, but Vince Young’s explosiveness and a tough defense might just snap Pete Carroll’s streak. Make sure to watch this one on the eve of Jan. 4—it could be one for the ages.

By Alex Schwartz Sports Columnist Maybe I’m completely wrong for thinking so, but I’ve always assumed that when all the chips fall, there is one strategy for poker that will be most successful. My entire education as a player has attempted to hone in on this one “perfect” strategy, and in my eyes, I keep getting closer and closer. It’s aggressive, sometimes overaggressive, and it puts me in situations where I’m forcing players to fold hands that they don’t necessarily want to play. Its one drawback is a tendency for wild swings, but in the end, it’s made me a lot of money. My suitemate, another pretty avid player, plays very differently. He’s more passive, a little more conventional, and he’s done pretty well for himself. I had never really given much thought to his style of play versus mine until he went on a huge winning streak. And when I say “winning streak,” I mean a serious one. I’m talking about $24,000 in a two-week period. Normally this wouldn’t cause any reflection on my part, but it happened to occur at the same time as a particularly vicious downswing on my end. As I sat there losing thousands of dollars, my suitemate would end each session with a bloated bankroll. For me, there is no feeling quite like the one that accompanies a prolonged downswing. I question myself, I wonder if I’m doing something wrong, and I compel myself to improve. It’s one of the biggest reasons I play as well as I do today, but it’s also a little self-destructive. In this instance, my questions and doubts abounded. Does my suitemate play a better style of poker than I do? Should I be more passive? Should I

call instead of raise on this particular hand? Almost every crucial decision that I faced during the course of a series of sessions became immediate material for second-guessing. After a week of agonizing over every hand, I decided I wasn’t going to do it anymore. The fact of the matter is, if you play enough cards, you derive your own style of play. And unless you really have no idea what’s going on, that style is going to be the right style for you. I’m not promoting extremely passive play, but what I am promoting is letting your own play evolve into something that works for you. One of the biggest mistakes I see a lot of players make is emulation. They watch the World Series of Poker on TV or they read a book by a supposed elite player, and they immediately replicate a specific style. When push comes to shove, this will never work. Being a winning player is about having confidence in your skill and the ability to search deep within the confi nes of your game to fi nd minute flaws to tweak until they become advantages over your opponents. You will never be able to do this when working with someone else’s strategy. I don’t know how a more passive player would play a given hand, so I had a lot of trouble analyzing my passive sessions. Playing that style, I will never be the player I am now; it just doesn’t work for me. So when you’re looking objectively at your style, take a moment to reflect: are you playing this style because you’re comfortable with it, or are you playing this style because someone else is comfortable with it? If you’re honest, I think the adjustments you make as a result of this could lead to some of the best self-assessment that any poker player is capable of making.

STUDENT LIFE IS NOW ON AOL INSTANT MESSENGER!

Now you can send us comments, tips, story ideas, and more via AIM. Our new screenname will be online 24/7 during the semester—just add “StudLife Editors” to your buddy list to instantly get in touch with us in the office.

Student Life: Your student newspaper

Are you a chess champion? An extreme sports enthusiast? An award-winning video gamer? Or something else entirely? Let us know! We’d love to report on your offbeat sports achievements.

Send us your story at sports@studlife.com.


6 STUDENT LIFE | FORUM

Senior Forum Editor / Molly Antos / forum@studlife.com

FORUM

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

Our daily Forum editors: Monday: Jeff Stepp Wednesday: Daniel Milstein Friday: Zach Goodwin jsstepp@wustl.edu daniel.milstein@wustl.edu goodwin@wustl.edu To ensure that we have time to fully evaluate your submissions, guest columns should be e-mailed to the next issue’s editor or forwarded to forum@studlife.com by no later than 5 p.m. two days before publication. Late pieces will be evaluated on a case-by-case basis. We welcome your submissions, and thank you for your consideration.

STAFF EDITORIAL

Come on—an orb and a pyramid?

F

or all those who thought that the Bunny was the most ridiculous sculpture the Wash. U. administration would ever choose, some drastic opinion revision may be necessary. Earlier this week, the University presented its new artistic masterpiece, consisting of a large orb and pyramid (hereafter known as the OP) on the campus side of the underpass by the South 40. A few months ago, it seemed like the administration was finally doing something about the ugly shack-like thing that was previously camped out

on this spot. As construction proceeded, much discussion ensued about what might take the shack’s place, from additional space for advertising student programming to an a capella stage or “speaker’s circle.” Little did we know that the school was just making room for its next masterpiece, the ugly, useless concrete shapes currently greeting all students heading to class from the 40 each morning. Staff editorials shouldn’t sound like a broken record, but if there has been one recurring theme this year, it is the administration’s problematic

spending of our tuition money. If you’re honestly going to charge us $40,000 a year just for the privilege of attending school here, could you please not waste it on what looks like a couple of oversized cement building blocks? Surely there are student groups or departments that could use an extra few thousand dollars, and they would probably do more with this cash than take up space just outside the 40. The administrators behind this monstrosity were unavailable for comment before we went to print, so we couldn’t find out exactly how much

the OP cost. It could be that this “installation” was in fact donated, thus costing students nothing in monetary terms. (Though who knows how much this will ultimately cost in terms of mental anguish?) Yet even if the piece was donated, couldn’t the administration at very least have made an announcement about these concrete lumps so that the general campus community would have known to expect (and protest) this bizarre installation? Next time the University considers another major project of this sort, perhaps they should

JOSH STEIN | EDITORIAL CARTOON

find some way of getting input from the larger student body about what they’d like to see, especially when it’s going to be in a high-visibility area like right outside Mallinckrodt or directly next to the underpass. Or perhaps the University could even sponsor a student contest to come up with the next piece of sculpture they install; it might not be great, but it will certainly be better than Eliot, the Bunny or the OP. For all the University’s talk about curbing student alcohol use, perhaps those in charge of deciding what artwork to

install on campus should take a close look at their own personal consumption habits. How else can we explain the recent major decisions our administration has made when it comes to deciding what sculptures to place in prominent places on campus? It’s not clear why the University continually chooses sculptures like our beloved anorexic bunny and the OP—but it is fairly clear that if taste in campus installations was at all factored into the U.S. News & World Report rankings we all value so highly, Wash. U. would be nowhere near the top 10.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Give course evals after courses end, not beforehand Dear Editor:

Word on the Street: What is your favorite shape?

Compiled by Mandy Silver and Daniel Milstein Contributing Editor and Forum Editor

I think the idea of course evals is fantastic. I also think that we students can fill them out more accurately and with more care if we could finish the courses we’re evaluating first! Geez, ArtSci people—lay off! Stop pestering me to fill out evaluations of classes I’m still taking. You wouldn’t ask Ebert for a thumbs up or thumbs down before the movie ended, would you? Which brings me to my next gripe: the course evals in their current form stink. The 1-7 rating system just isn’t that telling. Sure, there is the section for additional comments, but we students don’t get to see those when we’re trying to pick classes for next semester. That’s why I use ratemyprofessors.com. There you get basic number ratings on professors as well, but more important, you get a brief couple of sentences from students who have taken classes with that professor in the past. In the past, I’ve come across such helpful comments as “Avoid [this professor] like the plague!” and “One of the best teachers at Wash. U. Take anything you can with this professor!” So Wash. U. students, fill out your evaluations of three-quarters of each class you’re in, but also visit ratemyprofessors.com and let your fellow classmates know what you really think. -Eli Bilek Class of 2007

ArtSci Webmail has problems Dear Editor: Hey, you guys should defi nitely do a story on the disgraceful state of the ArtSci computing server. ArtSci students (who make up a large proportion of the school) are very frequently inconvenienced by not being able to check their e-mail because the server is slow. This happens to me like two or three times a week, and each time lasts something between three to fi ve hours. When you have to get an email out urgently, it’s hugely irritating. We need to campaign for them to change the server. So much for being one of the richest universities in the richest country in the world. -Elgin Toh Class of 2009

Go intramurals! Dear Matt Shapiro: I truly enjoyed reading your forum piece today on IM football. I’m not quite sure that what you learned on the football field is more important than what you learned in the classroom, but I believe it is just as important. Thanks for the unsolicited plug for the IM program. -Lynn Imergoot Associate Intramural Director

Correction: Name: Michelle Shemin and Jess Hammerman Year: Senior and junior

Name: Nima Golchin Year: Senior

Name: Mark Bartholomew Year: Junior

Name: Krista Carlson and Nadee Gunasena Year: Junior and senior

“Triangles, because they’re the most stable.”

“Square, because it’s hip to be square. Get it? Sesame Street.”

“Circle. I’m a sucker for simplicity.”

“Rhombus—that shit is my jam. Because they are slanty and crazy. It’s like a mullet for shapes—business and party.”

In Monday’s issue, the article about the University’s ACM computing team winning the regional competition incorrectly stated that the team beat 129 competing teams to win the regional competition. In fact, the team beat 123 other teams to win the regional competition. Student Life regrets the error.

YOUR VOICE: LETTERS AND GUEST COLUMNS

OUR VOICE: EDITORIAL BOARD

OUR WEB POLICY

Student Life welcomes letters to the editor and op-ed submissions from readers.

Editorials are written by the forum editors and reflect the consensus of the editorial board. The editorial board operates independently of the newsroom.

Once an article has been published on www.studlife.com, our Web site, it will remain there permanently. We do not remove articles from the site, nor do we remove authors’ names from articles already published on the Web, unless an agreement was reached prior to July 1, 2005.

Letters to the Editor One Brookings Drive #1039 Saint Louis, MO 63130-4899

News: (314) 935-5995 Fax: (314) 935-5938 e-mail: letters@studlife.com

All submissions must include the writer’s name, class, address and phone number for verification. Student Life reserves the right to edit all letters for style, length, libel considerations and grammar. Letters should be no longer than 350 words in length. Readers may also submit longer articles of up to 750 words as guest columns. Student Life reserves the right to print any submission as a letter or guest column.

Editor in Chief: Margaret Bauer Associate Editor: Liz Neukirch Managing Editor: David Tabor Senior News Editor: Sarah Kliff

Senior Forum Editor: Molly Antos Forum Editors: Zach Goodwin, Daniel Milstein, Jeff Stepp, Matt Shapiro

Why do we do this? Because Google and other search engines cache our Web site on a regular basis. Our thought is this: once an article has been published online, it’s too late to take back. It is irrevocably part of the public sphere. As such, removing an article from our site would serve no purpose.


Senior Forum Editor / Molly Antos / forum@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

STUDENT LIFE | FORUM

7

An ode to Bear’s Den employees T

here is a special type of person on the Wash. U. campus. A superior breed. Better than even an “Arrested Development” marathon with a “Curb Your Enthusiasm” nightcap. Yes, I’m talking about the Bear’s Den employees, and they really are amazing people. After eating at Bear’s Den approximately 1,428 times, it never ceases to amaze me what a delight the Bear’s Den employees are. Always smiling, they make Bear’s Den a feasible dining option (and you thought I was going to say bearable), even after 1,427 quesadillas and a buffalo chicken caesar. These keepers of the Den

Daniel Milstein deserve to be appreciated more. The job seems almost as bad as being a 13-year-old boy serving frozen bananas in Southern California on a warm summer day. I can’t even begin to imagine having to stand over a hot grill for hours,

serving burgers to mostly ungrateful and, after a certain hour, drunk college students (for anyone who has had to do something similar before: I’m so sorry). But they fi nd a way to do it, and sometimes even seem to have fun, joking around with us lowly students about how crazy it is to get breakfast burritos for nonbreakfast meals (namely lunch and dinner). This is why it is such a travesty that there are a few students who are being belligerent in Bear’s Den and forcing them to consider shortening their hours. While there is such a bastion of greatness on one side of Bear’s Den, there have

“While there is such a bastion of greatness on one side of Bear’s Den, there have been a couple of people who deserve to be thrown into an ocean near a seal with a taste for blood nearby.”

been a couple of people who deserve to be thrown into an ocean near a seal with a taste for blood nearby. People who have decided to be assholes, and detract from the workers’ aura. These people might not always be so Buster-ish, and are very likely under the influence of some substance, but when confronted with the eminence that is a Bear’s Den employee, everybody needs to bestow the proper respect. As this op-ed marks the conclusion of my fi rst full year as a Forum editor, I feel that it is my responsibility to attack someone in a position of power as well, not just students who had too much to drink and

would (hopefully) act differently in a more conscious state. So Wash. U. administration (or Bon Appétit, or whoever is in charge of this): pay these men and women more. Whatever they’re paid now is not enough. They are kings among men (and queens among women, I guess)—give them their ransom. And watch “Arrested Development.” For everyone who’s read this far, good luck with fi nals, have a good break and read more next semester! Daniel is a sophomore in Arts & Sciences and a Forum editor. He can be reached via e-mail at forum@studlife.com.

Don’t try to tell me it’s cold By Anna Dinndorf Staff Columnist

I

don’t know what you’re all complaining about: it’s not that cold. It’s getting to be that time of the year—winter. A time when days get shorter, days and nights get colder, and professors pile on the end-ofthe-semester fi nal projects and papers to prevent us from even thinking about fi nals until classes end. I have to agree, days getting shorter is incredibly depressing (especially after sleeping in until 2 p.m. after a night of heavy drinking and only having about two hours of daylight). And the end-of-thesemester workload is annoying bordering on painful. But really, people, it’s not that cold. The problem with going to school in a place like St. Louis is how centrally located it is. St. Louis is pretty much in the dead center of the country— which means that if Wash. U. students come evenly distributed from all over the country, half should come from south of here and half from north of here. Now this isn’t exact, since more people come from places like Missouri and Illinois and New York, but for approximation’s sake we’ll say it’s close to half and half. This clearly makes for a diverse array of climate experience among Wash. U.

students. I can understand if people coming from places like California or Texas or Alabama think it’s cold here. That’s fair. It’s warm where they come from. But the other 50 percent come from places that are further north and, theoretically, colder than it is here. I understand that on the coasts the climate is more temperate and so it probably doesn’t get as cold as it does here, but come on.

“Rather than whining that now it’s cold (it’s December... that’s what happens in December), enjoy the fact that you got two extra months of summer.” You can’t tell me you’ve never experienced 30-degree weather before. It seems like as soon as it drops below 50 degrees, everyone whips out the heavy duty North Face ski jackets and the hats and mittens and starts whining about how cold it is. In my opinion, everyone here should be glad that St. Louis summers last as long as they do. Officially, the fi rst day of fall is Sept. 21. We had summer-like weather until well

into November. Winter is an inevitable season that comes every year, and this year it came later than normal. Rather than whining that now it’s cold (it’s December….that’s what happens in December), enjoy the fact that you got two extra months of summer. I went to my home in Minnesota in October for fall break and it was in the 40-50 range while it was in the 70s here. When I went home for Thanksgiving, it snowed. Last winter break, about 75 percent of the time I was home the temperature before wind chill was below zero. Believe me, it could be worse. And in a way, the cold weather is a good thing. It’s the last week of classes, and fi nals are approaching: we shouldn’t be playing outside, anyway. We should be doing work and studying. Granted, it’s not a very pleasant thought. But think about how much worse it would be to be stuck doing work if it was nice outside. I know that I, for one, would be far less productive. And just think: in two weeks we’ll all be home or someplace far more exotic than here anyway. If you’re walking to the library this weekend and freezing your ass off, just think: at least you don’t have to go to Minnesota. Anna is a sophomore in Arts & Sciences. She can be reached via e-mail at anna.dinndorf@wustl. edu. RACHEL TEPPER | STUDENT LIFE

One woman’s approach

J

ane* is crazy. Not crazy like she sometimes wears mismatched socks or a black belt with brown shoes. Crazy as in she behaves illogically and irrationally. When Jane wants a boyfriend, she does things to catch a certain boy’s attention. She and her friends put on her their “cutest outfits,” (read: ample cleavage will be showing, even though Jane will routinely slap any poor soul she finds looking at it. It’s not there for men to look at, it’s…nevermind). The girls Molly load on plenty of Antos makeup, because it would certainly be ludicrous for someone to see Jane’s real face. Her philosophy is: the longer you can make him believe you’re actually someone else, the better the relationship will be. Jane straps on her tallest heels whilst complaining about how much they hurt her feet. (Note: her style of walking in the aforementioned heels would only look normal on an ice skating rink, but damn does she look good.) One night, a male dares to enter the force field Jane and her friends have created. He singles Jane out, asking her to dance. She gasps, slaps him and goes back to grinding with her friends. He refuses to admit defeat, and eventually convinces her to follow him to his room upstairs. What happens after is inappropriate to describe in any venue, except perhaps the lunchroom in a prison. Jane wakes up the next morning in John’s bed. Despite reiterating consistently over the course of the next couple of

weeks that he has no interest in having a girlfriend at this particular moment in time, Jane finally wears him down. She calls repeatedly and presents an airtight case about why they are meant for each other. He gets sick of saying no, so he agrees to be her boyfriend. (What a romantically auspicious beginning.) What follows represents a typical conversation between Jane and her boyfriend, John: Jane mutters something between ravenous bites of her gargantuan Big Mac. John: What was that, my beautiful darling? Jane (washes down her sandwich with large gulps of the 80 oz. diet soda): I’m just getting so fat. John: That’s not true—you are absolutely gorgeous. Jane just looks offended, gets up from the table and storms out of the restaurant. Typically, she will make the entire ride home silent and uncomfortable, only to forgive John for no apparent reason 15.45 minutes later. Once, during this routine argument, John made the mistake of fighting fire with water (he tried to use logic). He suggested that if Jane was worried about her weight, she could try eating sensibly and visiting the gym occasionally. This never happened again, however, because that was the last time Jane felt the need to bring her hunting rifle out of the closet. Even though she has no idea how to shoot it, John felt a bit apprehensive about sleeping with it pointed between his eyes every night. One time, John’s car broke

down on his way to pick Jane up for a date. Despite the pouring rain and the leaping flames consuming his engine, he dug in his glove box for a quarter and called Jane dutifully to alert her of his predicament. He was met with wailing sobs about his alleged unfaithfulness. It seems that John was wrong; he hadn’t any car trouble. According to Jane, it was clear he was having sex with another woman, but had called mid-gasm to tell her he wouldn’t be coming that evening. Finally, when John can’t take anymore, he breaks up with Jane, foolishly thinking he can find a woman who isn’t crazy. (Good luck with that, John.) Even though Jane brought this entirely upon herself, and now realizes that she took John for granted and mistreated him, she cries hysterically about how pig-headed he is, and how he doesn’t even know what he’s missing out on. (Oh, he knows, Jane.) What follows is a raucous session of the “blind leading the blind,” where her equally insane friends convince her of what a prize she is. They feed her ice cream, no one goes to the gym, and despite the growing monstrosity of her butt, her friends lie to her about how “she’s never looked better.” (Yeah, because that will help things.) After an appropriate mourning period (about two hours ought to do it), Jane recovers from losing “the love of her life” that she dated for two weeks, and declares herself ready to move on to someone new. Molly is a senior in Arts & Sciences and the senior Forum editor. She can be reached via e-mail at forum@studlife.com. *Name changed

Killer Coke? By Jo Felts Op-ed Submission

I

f asked to name two things that symbolize the United States of America, people around the world would probably mention Mickey Mouse and Coca-Cola. I have no major quarrel with the mouse— yet—but Coca-Cola is right up there with George W. Bush in damaging the United States’ reputation, and as students we all have the ability to do something. Human rights abuses, environmental concerns and monopolistic actions (“cheap” lunch—not on Coke’s watch) have tainted a company that has the ability to showcase some of the good aspects of America. The Coca-Cola Company has been surrounded by controversy since the carbonated drink fi rst graced the shelves of mom-and-pop shops nationwide. James Pemberton, who gave the world the brown sticky stuff claimed that Coca-Cola cured, among other things, morphine addiction, headache and impotence. Pemberton himself was addicted to morphine his entire life, so I am going to assume he preferred Pepsi. The Coca-Cola Company claims that its business works “in compliance with applicable law and with respect for basic human principles of decency and justice.” Yet the company is responsible for the murder of nine union workers in Colombia’s Coca-Cola bottling plant. The company is responsible for the depletion of groundwater and the pollution of people’s only source of water in India.

The company is representative of the United States, and to be frank, it’s not looking good. Since 1986, roughly 4,000 Colombian trade unionists have been murdered. Nine of these were killed by members of a paramilitary group hired by Cola-Cola in an attempt to break up SINALTRAINAL, a union

“Isidro Segundo Gil was murdered Dec. 5, 1996, in broad daylight inside his factory’s gates because he was a union leader.” organized by Coca-Cola’s workers. Coca-Cola, the company that made $4.85 billion in 2004, is perpetuating this cycle in the quest for more profits and in complete disregard for human life and rights. Isidro Segundo Gil was murdered Dec. 5, 1996, in broad daylight inside his factory’s gates because he was a union leader. The paramilitary group returned the next day and forced all of the bottling plant’s workers to resign from the union by signing a document with a Coca-Cola letterhead. In addition, workers have reported intimidation, kidnapping, torture and unlawful detainment. Children of workers have been kidnapped to send a message to their parents. When 15-year-old David Jose Carranza Calle was pulled off his bicycle on Sept. 10

2003, he was detained for four hours and then questioned about his father, who worked at a Coca-Cola plant. Is this how America should be portrayed to the rest of the world? In the state of Rajasthan, India, the High Court ruled that all soft drinks must declare the level of pesticides. Instead of improving their practices and using more sustainable methods, CocaCola appealed the Nov. 2004 decision on the grounds that such an action would compromise their “commercial confidentiality.” According to Coca-Cola small traces of DDT and other pesticides are not harmful “to the health of the consumer.” What can be done? Through the United States, Canada, United Kingdom, Ireland and Italy students have been trying to push Coca-Cola off campuses; some have already shown remarkable success, such as at Rutgers University in New Jersey. As consumers of Coca-Cola, students have a lot of power, and that power should be used to ensure Coca-Cola does not continue to ruin the lives of workers and drinkers worldwide. If that argument does not persuade you, what about the idea of choice on campus? We should not have to settle for Coca-Cola products. In a shameless use of a Dr. Pepper ad—what’s the worst that can happen? Look for fl yers around campus for details about a meeting. Jo is a junior in Arts & Sciences. She can be reached via e-mail at jfelts@artsci.wustl. edu.


8 STUDENT LIFE | CADENZA

Senior Cadenza Editor / Laura Vilines / cadenza@studlife.com

ON this

JANUARY

3

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

ALL REAL NUMBERS

DATE

By Robbie Gross, Theatre Editor

Jan. 3, 1889

Friedrich Nietzsche, leaving his hotel in Turin, Italy, saw a horse being whipped by a coachman on the far end of the Piazza Carlo Alberto. Running over, he threw his arms around the animal. He then burst into tears and would remain in a state of madness for the rest of his life.

BY DAVID FREEMAN

The beginning of the Xbox 360 By Adam Summerville Movie Editor So, you were lucky enough to get an Xbox 360—Wait, what? You weren’t? You didn’t preorder it back in May? You didn’t camp out at Best Buy for 17 hours? You were unwilling to spend $800 on eBay? Oh, well, I’m sorry. For those not in the know, the Xbox 360 is the fi rst of the next generation of systems to be launched, representing Microsoft’s second foray into the console wars. It boasts numerous improvements over the previous Xbox, such as enhanced graphics, built-in wireless controller capabilities (controllers designed to fit in human hands, no less), media streaming from your PC (so you can easily watch all of your downloaded “Family Guy” episodes on your TV) and HDTV support as well as the best aspects of the Xbox (i.e. lots of fi rst-person shooter, sports and racing games, all of them playable online via Xbox Live). The following is a review of the newest games available for the newest system.

Kameo: Elements of Power

★★★✬✩

Worth it for: the massive battles and cool shape-shifting abilities The main drawback: the lack of puzzles that will actually challenge you Should be played by: fans of “Zelda” Final word: If you are looking for a fun adventure game, “Kameo” is certainly your best bet on the 360. “Kameo: Elements of Power” has been in the works for a long time. Originally, it was designed for the GameCube, then for the Xbox when Microsoft bought the developer (Rare, maker of the quintessential N64 game, “Goldeneye”) and then fi nally for the 360 when it was going to come too late in the Xbox’s life-cycle. Unfortunately, the wait was only kind of worth it. You play as Kameo, an elf princess of some kind, who was bestowed with the power to gain certain “elemental spirits” and then transform into them. This means that you are not just a pixie with limited offensive capabilities, but rather a pixie with the ability to turn into a spiked ice gorilla, a fl ame-breathing dragon, an oil-slick–producing fi sh and a mortar-wielding termite, to name a few of the spirits. You are only allowed to pick from any three spirits on the fl y, meaning you have to put thought into which three you are going to need. If you want to utterly decimate your enemies, you might want to use the ice gorilla to create an avalanche of stalactites, then switch to a rock monster, which is strictly a pile of boulders, and explode, then switch to the boxing Venus fl ytrap to fi nish off the straggling orcs. Or you might need to be the armadillo, capable of rolling around so that you can ramp and then in mid-air switch to the ice gorilla to climb up a cliff. The way the game forces you to think about what powers you are going to need is certainly its best and most well-thoughtout aspect. The game does have its stumbling points, though. The armadillo-gorilla puz-

zle-solving mechanic is used all the time, making it seem as if the developers could only think of a few novel ways to combine the powers of different spirits. The story is also confusing and underdeveloped, with major holes left gaping at the end. “Kameo” is still a very enjoyable game, with graphics that defi nitely showcase the advances of the next generation. Battles involving hundreds of orcs and elf warriors with thousands of dragons flying overhead punctuate the quest, and they are breathtaking (especially at the end, when you can singlehandedly kill 40 orcs at a time). Any fans of “Zelda” will certainly be pleased by “Kameo,” but the game is not going to win over many nonbelievers.

Perfect Dark Zero

★★★★✩

Worth it for: the awesome arsenal and many levels of multiplayer goodness The main drawback: the single-player campaign is very mediocre Should be played by: people nostalgic for “Goldeneye” or looking for something to tide them over until “Halo 3” Final word: a beautiful fi rstperson shooter with many innovations and a great multiplayer game “Perfect Dark Zero” shares a story similar to that of “Kameo.” It, too, has followed the path from GameCube to Xbox to Xbox 360, with a lot more doubts cast about it along the way. First, it was going to be the second coming of “Halo” (which, amazingly, was not “Halo 2”). Then it was going to be the biggest disappointment since “ET” killed the video game industry. Finally, people stopped

speculating, threw up their hands in frustration, and said, “We have no clue what it’s going to be like.” It is certainly more on the spectacular success side than on the spectacular failure side, but it winds up being just good. A prequel to the original “Perfect Dark,” “PDZ” takes us through the life of a mercenary in a not-too-distant future. We are treated to the same “Blade Runner”-esque locales that have been so very popular as a representation of the nottoo-distant future since the movie came out in 1982. The environments themselves are breathtaking, with the guns and their various capabilities coming in at a close second. The characters and their animations are okay, but they look and move a bit too much like action fi gures. Every single gun has a secondary mode of fi re—usually nothing related to the actually fi ring of bullets—with a couple guns even having a tertiary mode of fi re. These range from the mundane, like silencers and night vision, to the slightly more interesting, like radar pinging and fl y-by-wire missiles, to the innovative, like cloaking devices and decoy shots that make you appear to be hundreds of feet away from your actual position. Every single gun is useful, with even the simplest pistol having decent range and the ever-useful silencer. That’s right—for the fi rst time ever, the silencer is actually useful. The radar in “PDZ” is sound-based, akin to the movement-based radar of “Halo” but even trickier. Some guns are silent so you will be invisible, others can create noise elsewhere to deceive and others are just deafening and will give your position away quickly.

“Your Home Away From Home” ~ from your friends at Protzel’s Deli “The finest corned beef anywhere.”

7608 Wydown Blvd • (314) 721-4445 call ahead for faster carryout Tues-Fri 7:30am-5:30pm • Sat-Sun 7:30am-3:00pm Serving Washington University students and faculty since 1954.

MAKE YOUR REALITY A DREAM VESPA SAINT LOUIS 5127 Delmar Blvd., Saint Louis, MO

314-361-5446

www.vespastlouis.com

These all come to the forefront in the multiplayer modes, the real bread and butter of the game. There are the usual deathmatch and king-of-the-hill styles of play, but the best are very similar to “Counter-Strike.” You gain money after every round, which you can use to buy new weaponry to better achieve your team’s goals. There are also two vehicles, a jetpack and a hovertank. Neither is overly powerful, and with some careful playing they can be effectively neutralized. If you love to play games online or are looking for a good co-op mode (the only thing that makes the campaign enjoyable), “Perfect Dark Zero” is a great choice. The maps are limited in number but are very well designed and are certainly large enough to be interesting for a long time. The guns are great, with more variety and depth than just about any other two fi rst-person shooters combined. If this is any indication of the type of work that Rare is going to be putting out this generation, Xbox 360 owners are going to be in luck.

King Kong: The Official Game of the Movie

★★★★✩

Worth it for: the Kong levels and genuine feel of cinematic immersion The main drawback: the ride is too short Should be played by: those looking for an immersive experience Final word: The game feels more like an enjoyable movie than most movies do.

STUDENT LIFE

Everyone knows about King Kong. We all know that he is a giant ape and that he climbs the Empire State Building. Most probably haven’t seen the 1933 classic, but with the upcoming Peter Jackson fi lm, many more will be introduced to the ape and his love. The game puts you in the shoes of the two protagonists of “King Kong,” Jack Driscoll and the titular ape himself. The Driscoll stages, which make up the majority of the game, are played from the fi rst person to great effect. There is no health meter, no ammunition counter, none of the traditional trappings of the genre. Instead, your vision turns red and blurry when you are about to die, and Jack will say out loud how much ammunition he has and when it is getting to be time to reload. While these seem like minor details, since the game is already in 16:9 widescreen, the lack of aiming reticles and clutter makes the game feel much more like a movie. That, combined with the cinematic fl air that permeates the game, makes for a wonderful experience. VRexes (cousins of the T-Rex) will jump out and you will be forced to distract them because, of course, your

puny pistol will have no effect. Brontosauruses will stampede in front of you, forcing you to dodge through their legs. And, of course, the natives will kidnap you and offer you up to their god, Kong. The fi rst time you encounter Kong, it is breathtaking. The human characters look good, but Kong looks spectacular. With his shattering roar, the giant ape comes to life. The Kong stages are also the best in the game. The camera moves and cuts in a way that one would expect from the movie but not in a game, while managing never to actually interfere with the gameplay itself. You will fi ght giant bat monsters, wrestle with dinosaurs and make the jungle your playground. The sense of scale is amazing. Usually, when a game makes you “big,” you still feel normal-sized and everything else just seems smaller; however, as Kong, you feel like a 30-foot-tall ape, moving with real power and weight. Both segments of the game are great, but the Kong sequences really shine. As Jack, the game is certainly entertaining and is one of the most innovative fi rst-person shooters ever designed. As Kong, you feel like power incarnate.


Senior Cadenza Editor / Laura Vilines / cadenza@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

STUDENT LIFE | CADENZA

9

ALBUM REVIEWS Imogen Heap: “Speak for Yourself” By Adam Summerville Movie Editor It is actually safe to assume that just about every single student at Wash. U. has heard Imogen Heap. Most probably have no clue who she is or where they have heard her music, but this does not change the fact that they have heard her voice. Here is a hint: it appears in a movie that 625 of you say is one of your Facebook favorites. Second hint: Zach Braff wrote, starred in and directed the movie. Imogen Heap is none other

than the former lead singer of Frou Frou, a band you will inevitably recognize because of their song “Let Go.” Every song off Imogen Heap’s new album is defi nitely recognizable as being related to “Let Go,” mostly because Ms. Heap’s voice is so very distinctive—but the song structure itself is pretty uniform throughout. Her voice is always the forefront sound, backed up by some synth and usually a drum machine. This isn’t to say that the songs aren’t interesting. “Hide and Seek” is an entirely vo-

Imogen Heap Speak for Yourself Grade: ★★★✩✩ For fans of: Frou Frou, Bjork Download: “Headlock,” “Hide and Seek”

Boards of Canada: “The Campfire Headphase” cal track, save for the most blatant digital alteration of a person’s voice since the techno opera in “The Fifth Element.” Others involve a breakout of the yodel, making her sound very Björk-esque. The songs are at their best when they have a slower tempo and sound less like bad ‘80s pop music; her vocal stylings just do not work in a faster setting, particularly when the background tracks sound as if they were designed by a guy wearing neon, Devo sunglasses and a keyboard tie. The album is certainly interesting, and anyone who is a fan of Bjork or enjoyed “Let Go” should give it a listen. Some of the songs are very intriguing, unique or catchy, though very rarely all three; unfortunately, others are so derivative and badly synthpoppy so as to be unlistenable. The spottiness of the album is certainly its biggest negative point, reducing the album from 12 songs to seven if you only care to listen to good music.

FRESHMAN FIFTEEN

By Jordan Deam

repeat a guitar part verbatim throughout most of a song, but it just sounds too…predictable. Only when they pipe it through delays, distortions and filters does it sound like Boards of Canada should, as in the first couple minutes of “Dayvan Cowboy.” The track opens up with a beautiful cyclical guitar part accompanied by faint synths and tambourine, only to turn into a watered-down fruit smoothie of strummed chords, melodramatic strings and cymbal crashes. That’s not to say that the album is without merit: for anyone who has enjoyed “Music Has the Right to Children” or “Geogaddi,”

Music Editor Despite their tendency towards tongue-in-cheek subversiveness, Boards of Canada are a pretty traditional electronic group. Their music is populated with polyrhythmic drum machines, melodic synths and enough studio manipulation to make Kraftwerk sound like Gregorian chant. So when the first warbly notes of “Chromakey Dreamcoat” came out of my speakers, I was a bit surprised. Boards of Canada were actually playing guitar. And to top it off, it actually sounded like a guitar (albeit with the wow and flutter of a broken tape deck—a Boards of Canada staple). Was Boards of Canada too experimental to pick up the guitar before “The Campfire Headphase” or too firmly rooted in the sound that they had already established? It’s difficult to say, but either way, it might have been better if they hadn’t. Perhaps it’s their tendency to

there’s plenty here to satisfy your craving for heady textures and simple melodies. “Satellite Anthem Icarus” starts off with a lazily strummed acoustic guitar, only to fade into the bubbly synths and disembodied voices that Boards of Canada fans have grown to love. Elsewhere, “Oscar Sees Through the Red Eye” takes a page out of Aphex Twin’s book, with just enough adornments to prevent you from calling the music “ambient.” Unfortunately, for every moment of “traditional” Boards of Canada on “Campfire Headphase,” there’s a reason to make use of your CD player’s skip button.

Boards of Canada The Campfire Headphase Grade: ★★★✬✩ Bottom line: sounds best sans guitar For fans of: Aphex Twin, Air, DJ Shadow Songs to download: “Chromakey Dreamcoat,” “Dayvan Cowboy,” “Satellite Anthem Icarus”

Fiona Apple: “Extraordinary Machine” Fiona Apple

BY JASON ANDERSON

Extraordinary Machine Grade: ★★★★✬ For fans of: Aimee Mann, Tori Amos Songs to download: “Tymps (The Sick in the Head Song),” “Extraordinary Machine,” “O’ Sailor” Bottom line: traditional Apple, but nothing extraordinary

By Jenni Lee Cadenza Reporter

CADENZA IS SEEKING A BOOK REVIEWER AND A FINE ARTS EDITOR Like to read new books or attend the latest gallery openings? You could hold one of these positions. For more details about either position, contact senior Cadenza editor Laura Vilines via e-mail at lhviline@wustl.edu.

After disappearing for nearly six years, Fiona Apple has reentered the spotlight with her more than long-awaited third album, “Extraordinary Machine.” Apple exploded onto the music scene back in 1996 with her triple platinum debut record, “Tidal.” After the lukewarm success of her second album “When the Pawn Hits…”, hopes

were high that Apple would make a dramatic comeback with her next release. So why the six-year hiatus? Fiona fanatics may know the true story—that Apple finished recording “Extraordinary Machine” in May 2003, but Sony/ Epic Records didn’t think the album would sell and refused to release it. Even Apple herself felt insecure about the quality of the record. Lost and confused, the young artist retreated

ORTHO EVRA BIRTH CONTROL PATCH The FDA has recently warned of increased risk of blood clots, heart attack, and strokes. If you used the patch and then had a blood clot, heart attack or stroke, you may have a legal claim. Call the Law Firm of

SCHLICHTER BOGARD & DENTON Roger C. Denton for a free legal consultation Voted by peers in the publication “Best Lawyers in America - 2005” Call: (314) 621-6115 or 1-(800) 873-5297 This is a paid legal adverstisement Attorneys are licensed in Illinois and Missouri

to Venice to rediscover herself. Meanwhile, a Fiona admirer obtained an early copy of “Extraordinary Machine” and released it on the Internet. A group of fans responded by launching the site freefiona.com and campaigned for Sony to release the album. After the issue caught the media’s attention, as the story goes, Sony gave Apple complete creative freedom. To cement her artistic vision, Apple sought guidance from Mike Elizondo, who has produced hits for hiphop artists such as 50 Cent. The refurbished Elizondo version of “Extraordinary Machine” was finally released this October. The finished product reveals a surprisingly optimistic turn from the dark, cynical path Apple followed from “Tidal” to “When the Pawn Hits...” The title track elegantly blends woodwinds, strings and bells, setting the tone of “Extraordinary Machine” with a lighthearted, ‘50s-like bounce uncharacteristic of her previous albums. “Tymps (The Sick in the Head Song)” offers an intriguing melody and a contagious beat that has you instantly clapping along. Apple abandons her sultry alto voice on several songs and explores her high range, making the once “sullen” girl sound rather sweet. Yet within the album’s candy-coated chords seeps a hint of diminished confidence, particularly in the lyrics, which normally showcase Apple’s sophistication and skill as a poet. Certain lines in “Extraordinary Machine” resemble a teenager’s romantic woes: “So why did I kiss him so hard late last Friday night/And keep on lettin’ him change all my plans?” She makes up for such lyrical lapses elsewhere, unraveling into a double-time, rhythm-driven rant of emotional grievances in “Not About Love.” The complaints about “Extraordinary Machine” certainly do not negate the record’s overall appeal and several potentially addictive tracks. Fortunately, the album preserves the delightfully bitter undertone that first made fans fall in love with Apple; however, it seems doubtful that “Extraordinary Machine” will recreate the remarkable wave that “Tidal” produced 10 years ago.


10 STUDENT LIFE | CADENZA

Senior Cadenza Editor / Laura Vilines / cadenza@studlife.com

Suits, squares and…spyware?

sound affects

By Jordan Deam Music Editor From what I’ve gathered from talking with my elders, there was a time in popular music history called the Good Old Days. It was a simple and joyous time, a time when bands were excited with the possibilities of sound, when audiences craved what they had never heard before and when the industry hadn’t quite figured out how to exploit either side of the market with clinical efficiency. The precise boundary dates of the Good Old Days are hotly contested: a coworker at my uncle’s warehouse last summer, a rabid CSNY fan, insisted that it began with the christening of David Crosby (Aug. 17, 1941) and ended with the Iran Contra affair (which, he claims, happened “right after the Feds shut Woodstock down”), while the goth girl that I lifeguarded with in high school felt it began with the release of the Cure’s seminal album, “Disintegration,” and ended with the fall of the Berlin Wall. (She didn’t offer an explanation). But both would agree on one thing: the Good Old Days are over, and they’re not coming back anytime soon. Case in point: the recently unearthed Rootkit scandal per-

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

petuated by the friendly folks at Sony BMG. For those less intimately connected to the world of entertainment news, I’ll break it down: for a few weeks in late October and early November, international supercorporation Sony BMG released select CDs containing a program that would install itself on the user’s computer the fi rst time the CD is played. This software decreases the computer’s performance, is undetectable by antivirus software and leaves the computer open to a plethora of insidious spyware that, for example, allows international supercorporations to fi nd out whether people who visit Amnesty International’s Web site also spend hours at eBaum’s World watching videos of people lighting themselves on fi re. (Wouldn’t you pay to fi nd out?) Of course, this was a colossal fuck-up on Sony BMG’s part, not only because they invaded the privacy of the very consumers from whom they profit, but because it was quickly discovered and lambasted by even the most conservative media outlets. Whereas we all knew since that old lady was sued for fi lesharing that the RIAA is a group of moneygrubbing bastards, now we have concrete proof that the music industry is, in fact, run by an evil technodemon bent on enslaving the world’s population by corrupting its PCs. But it was not always this way: harken back, reader, to

the Good Old Days of music marketing, when fi lesharing meant humming the melody of the latest Hollies single to your friends, when a portable radio the size of a paperback novel was considered high-tech, and when the Monkees’ lack of talent actually caused a minor controversy. We’ve all enjoyed the music from this period, but while a passionate guitar solo can grow stale after a few decades of rotation on classic rock radio stations, watching corporate assholes fall flat on their faces is, and always will be, timeless. Here are a few of the more feeble and transparent attempts by a group of stodgy, uptight republicans to market a product whose hipness they cannot begin to comprehend:

people had heard of The Flaming Lips, including, apparently, the management at Warner Bros., who just happened to own all of The Flaming Lips’ intellectual property. The stars must have been aligned for an embarrassment of this magnitude to occur in front of a nation of unsuspecting teenage girls.

terday…and Today,” depicting the English boys in butcher smocks, covered in raw meat and the dismembered limbs of plastic baby dolls. Somehow the art was approved for widespread commercial release, until department stores saw the cover and refused the sell them. A “glamour shot” of the group sitting around a piece of inoffensive luggage was pasted on to thousands of the originals; now, you can fi nd framed copies selling for more than $500 on eBay. Yesterday’s scandal…is tomorrow’s conversation piece, I guess.

1) The Flaming Lips play the Peach Pit on “90210” Any shred of pseudo-ironic indie cred that this bizarre event might grant the show immediately evaporates when Ian Ziering utters a line that will go down in infamy: “You know, I’ve never been a big fan of alternative music, but these guys rocked the house!” It’s understandable that The Flaming Lips hadn’t heard of “90210”— anyone who’s ever seen the documentary “Okie Noodling” with its companion soundtrack by the Lips will realize that these guys come from a very different world. Likewise, aside from the marginal success of “She Don’t Use Jelly,” very few

a corporation, not a band.” A group of sneering British punks playing drug-addled atonal vamps that seem to go on into eternity. Then we have the congenial but plastic Dick Clark, surrounded by a bunch of actors paid to play fun, freewheeling teenagers. Of course, it doesn’t take long for disorder to set in. Lydon makes no effort to hide his lip-synching and begins harassing the cameramen within the fi rst few bars of “Poptones.” The audience, no doubt confused and frightened by the performance, tries desperately to stay in character, but to no avail: by the time the band launches into “Careering,” Lydon has incited the faux teenagers to storm the stage. Dick Clark later referred to the episode as “one of the ten best ‘American Bandstand’ episodes of all time,” an opinion that must have taken years of hypnotherapy for Clark to arrive at.

WWW.RAREBEATLES.COM

WWW.FLAMINGLIPS.COM

2) The Beatles release “Yesterday…and Today” in the U.S. This one requires a bit more explanation: after having their UK-released materials chopped up and reassembled into their American counterparts, the Fab Four got fed up with their management and decided to let their discontent manifest itself creatively. What followed was the infamous “Butcher cover” of the Frankensteinian “Yes-

3) Public Image, Ltd. Perform on “American Bandstand” This one is, without a doubt, the Haley’s Comet of marketing screw-ups. It is so brilliant in its irony that it’s doubtful we’ll see another blunder of its scale in our lifetimes. On the one hand, we have Public Image, Ltd., fronted by John Lydon, née Johnny Rotten of the Sex Pistols. A collective of musicians so conscious of their music as a commodity that Lydon often quipped, “We’re WWW.SPIKE00.COM

Weber Auto Body & Storage

HOLIDAY PARKING

Coiffures by Shawn 312 N. Euclid Donna Heath St. Louis, MO 63108 hair designer 314.361.3422 In the Central West End hairartist@sbcglobal.net

5 Blocks from WashU 5822 McPherson Ct. 725-9498

Inside Heated Garage Fully Secured Also Body and Paint Work

Receive 20% off your first visit with Donna, advanced training in hair design and color techniques.

MAKE RESERVATIONS NOW! ok, so my subs really aren't gourmet and we're not french either. my subs just taste a little better, that's all! I wanted to call it jimmy john's tasty sandwiches, but my mom told me to stick with gourmet. She thinks whatever I do is gourmet, but i don't think either of us knows what it means. so let's stick with tasty!

Established in Charleston, IL in 1983 to add to students GPA and general dating ability.

$5.25

8" SUB SANDWICHES

GIANT club sandwiches

All of my tasty sub sandwiches are a full 8 inches of homemade French bread, fresh veggies and the finest meats & cheese I can buy! And if it matters to you, we slice everything fresh everyday in this store, right here where you can see it. (No mystery meat here!)

My club sandwiches have twice the meat and cheese, try it on my fresh baked thick sliced 7 grain bread or my famous homemade french bread!

#1

PEPE®

Real applewood smoked ham and provolone cheese garnished with lettuce, tomato, and mayo. (Awesome!)

#2 BIG

JOHN®

Medium rare shaved roast beef, topped with yummy mayo, lettuce, and tomato. (Can't beat this one!)

#3 SORRY CHARLIE California baby tuna, mixed with celery, onions, and our tasty sauce, then topped with alfalfa sprouts, cucumber, lettuce, and tomato. (My tuna rocks!)

slim slim slim slim slim slim

1 2 3 4 5 6

Ham & cheese Roast Beef Tuna salad Turkey breast Salami, capicola, cheese Double provolone

Low Carb Lettuce Wrap

#4 TURKEY TOM®

JJ UNWICH™

Fresh sliced turkey breast, topped with lettuce, tomato, alfalfa sprouts, and mayo. (The original)

#5 VITO™ The original Italian sub with genoa salami, provolone, capicola, onion, lettuce, tomato, & a real tasty Italian vinaigrette. (Order it with hot peppers, trust me!)

#6 VEGETARIAN Several layers of provolone cheese separated by real avocado spread, alfalfa sprouts, sliced cucumber, lettuce, tomato, and mayo. (Truly a gourmet sub not for vegetarians only . . . . . . . . . . . peace dude!)

J.J.B.L.T.™ Bacon, lettuce, tomato, & mayo. (The only better BLT is mama's BLT, this one rules!)

Same ingredients and price of the sub or club without the bread.

YOUR CATERING SOLUTION!!! BOX LUNCHES, PLATTERS, PARTIES!

★ Soda Pop . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . $1.35/$1.55 ★ Giant chocolate chip or oatmeal raisin cookie . . . $1.50 ★ Real potato chips or jumbo kosher dill pickle . . . . $1.10 ★ Extra load of meat . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . $1.25 ★ Extra cheese or extra avocado spread . . . . . . . . . . $0.75 ★ Hot Peppers. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . $0.10 (subs & clubs only) Onion, lettuce, alfalfa sprouts, tomato, mayo, sliced cucumber, Dijon mustard, oil & vinegar, and oregano.

Delivery charges apply. Offer expires December 31, 2005 Mon-Thur 10am-1am • Fri-Sat 10am-2am • Sun 11am-11pm

CALL: 367-PAPA (7272)

#7 GOURMET SMOKED HAM CLUB A full 1/4 pound of real applewood smoked ham, provolone cheese, lettuce, tomato, & real mayo! (A real stack)

#8 BILLY CLUB® Roast beef, ham, provolone, Dijon mustard, lettuce, tomato, & mayo. (Here's to my old pal Billy who invented this great combo.)

#9 ITALIAN NIGHT CLUB® Real genoa salami, Italian capicola, smoked ham, and provolone cheese all topped with lettuce, tomato, onion, mayo, and our homemade Italian vinaigrette. (You hav'ta order hot peppers, just ask!)

#10 HUNTER’S CLUB® A full 1/4 pound of fresh sliced medium rare roast beef, provolone, lettuce, tomato, & mayo. (It rocks!!!)

#11 COUNTRY CLUB® Fresh sliced turkey breast, applewood smoked ham, provolone, and tons of lettuce, tomato, and mayo! (A very traditional, yet always exceptional classic!)

#12 BEACH CLUB® Fresh baked turkey breast, provolone cheese, avocado spread, sliced cucumber, sprouts, lettuce, tomato, and mayo! (It's the real deal folks, and it ain't even California.)

★ ★ ★ ★ JIMMYJOHNS.COM ★ ★ ★ ★

#13 GOURMET VEGGIE CLUB® Double provolone, real avocado spread, sliced cucumber, alfalfa sprouts, lettuce, tomato, & mayo. (Try it on my 7-grain whole wheat bread. This veggie sandwich is world class!)

THE J.J. GARGANTUAN™ This sandwich was invented by Jimmy John's brother Huey. It's huge enough to feed the hungriest of all humans! Tons of genoa salami, sliced smoked ham, capicola, roast beef, turkey & provolone, jammed into one of our homemade French buns then smothered with onions, mayo, lettuce, tomato, & our homemade Italian dressing.

WE’RE IN WASHINGTON UNIVERSITY’S TRANSPORTATION LOOP.

#14 BOOTLEGGER CLUB® Roast beef, turkey breast, lettuce, tomato, & mayo. An American classic, certainly not invented by J.J. but definitely tweaked and fine-tuned to perfection!

#15 CLUB TUNA® The same as our #3 Sorry Charlie except this one has a lot more. Homemade tuna salad, provolone, sprouts, cucumber,lettuce, & tomato. (I guarantee it's awesome!)

#16 CLUB LULU™ Fresh sliced turkey breast, bacon, lettuce, tomato, & mayo. (JJ's original turkey & bacon club)

WE DELIVER! 7 DAYS A WEEK ST. LOUIS

Delivery charges apply. Offer expires December 31, 2005

Add additional medium 1-topping pizzas for $5 each

DELIVERY ORDERS will include a delivery charge of 50¢ per item (+/–10¢).

$7.25

★ side items ★

freebies

Any Sub minus the veggies and sauce

Large 1-Topping Pizza $7.99 3 Medium 1-Topping Pizzas $15

$4.25 $2.95 PLAIN SLIMS™

SUPER STUDENT SPECIALS!

6681 DELMAR BLVD.

3674 FOREST PARK PKWY.

13586 NW INDUSTRIAL DR.

862.6565

531.8500

209.0111

"YOUR MOM WANTS YOU TO EAT AT JIMMY JOHN'S!" © 1 9 8 5 , 2 0 0 2 , 2 0 0 3 , 2 0 0 4 J I M M Y J O H N ’ S F R A N C H I S E I N C . A L L R I G H T S R E S E RV E D . We R e s e r ve T h e R i g h t To M a k e A n y M e n u C h a n g e s .


WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

STUDENT LIFE | CLASSIFIEDS

CLASSIFIEDS FREE Classifieds

Classified ads are free to students, faculty and staff in most instances. To place your FREE 25-word ad, simply email us from your WU email account.

Classifications Help Wanted For Rent Roommates Sublet Real Estate For Sale Automotive

Wanted Services Tickets Travel Spring Break Lost & Found Personals

Line Ad Rates

Placing Your Ad

Deadlines

Rates listed below are for businesses or individuals not affiliated with WU.

http://www.studlife.com

In order to be published, all ads must be placed and paid for by:

1-5 issues: 50¢ per word, per issue 6-9 issues: 40¢ per word, per issue 10+ issues: 30¢ per word, per issue

Please check your ad carefully on the first day of publication and notify Student Life of any errors. We will only be responsible for the first day’s incorrect insertion.

HELP CHILDREN LEARN Kumon Math and Reading: Winter Break and Spring Semester. Kumon Ladue/ Florissant Center. $10$15/hour. Email resume to tdk@cse.wustl.edu or call (314) 993-9192.

GORGEOUS COMPLETELY RENOVATED 1-BR at 7321 Wise. Minutes from campus. New hardwood floor kitchen with granite, new and modern appliances, microwave included, carpeted living and bedroom, walk in closet, marble bath, common washer/dryer, workout room and storage, on site parking, secure entrances. $550-$750/mo. Call 314503-7076, 314-503-4181.

SEEKING PART-TIME (WED 12-6; FRI 2:30-6) experienced child care provider for our infant twins. $10/hour. Near W.U. Med school. Please call Carol @314-8539555. SEMESTER BREAK WORK: $14 base/appt, 1-5 week work program, flexible sched., customer sales/service, may continue in spring or secure summer work, all ages 18+, 314-997-7873. SUBSCRIPTION MANAGER NEEDED. Student Life is looking for a reliable student to manage and maintain our database of of parent/alumni subscriptions. Duties also include sending out weekly mailing. 4-6 hours per week. Flexible schedule. Email resume to lcuber@studlife.com.

1 AND 2 BEDROOM APARTEMENTS AND houses close to campus. Call Efthim Company Realtors for student specials 314-781-0010. 1 BDRM APT LARGE 1+ BDRM, 1510 McCausland, close to campus, dishwasher, hw floors, central AC, covered parking, $450/ month. Call 922-6715 or 374-6259. 810 PENNSYLVANIA. DUPLEX 2 BEDROOM/ 1 new bath. Central air, hardwood floors, washer/dryer hookup, off-street parking, garage, quiet street, front deck. Call 314-680-2883. AFFORDABLE SOUTH CITY APARTMENTS, clean & quiet, appliances, central air, updated systems, energy efficient, 4 unit bldgs. 1 bedroom $370. 2 bedroom $530. Owner/Broker 636-938-1447 or 314-509-2241. FOR RENT 1240 HAWTHORNE 63117 1 Bedroom C/A, gas and hot water included $35/mo. Call for move in specials Efthim Company Realtors. 314-7810010. FOR RENT 6244 OAKLAND 63139 2 bedroom Window A/C, heat and hot water included. Call for move in specials. Efthim Company Realtors 314-781-0010.

Email: classifieds@studlife.com Don’t forget to include a contact number so we can confirm pricing & payment! • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Phone: 314.935.6713 Prefer to speak with someone? Call us to place your ad by credit card! • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

There is a 15-word minimum charge on all classified ads. The first three words (max. one line) are bold and capitalized. All ads will appear on studlife.com at no additional charge.

FOR RENT 7204 SOUTHWEST 63143 2 bedroom C/A Unit in very nice condition MUST SEE. Call for Student Specials Efthim Company Realtors 314-781-0010.

MAD SCIENCE INSTRUCTORS: Enthusiastic instructors needed to teach part-time (after school, 1 to 5 days per week), fun, hands-on science programs in elementary schools. Must have transportation. $25.00 - $27.50 per 1 hour class. Call 314-991-8000.

For the fastest and easiest service, place and pay for your ad online! Click on the “Classifieds” link on our website to get started! • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Terms & Conditions

CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS: Mapping your Environment. Create 2-D 8.5” x 11” map of WashU. Maps will appear in artwork on view April 2006. Submit envelopes in Lewis Center/ Bixby beginning November 28th. Attach information sheet with name, year, major, and email. Questions? Email lkoniell@art.wustl. edu

GET PAID TO drive a brand new car! Now paying drivers $800-$3200 a month. Pick up your free car key today. www.freecarkey.com

11

FOR RENT 7552 OXFORD 63105 2 bedroom C/A 1 parking space $710 @month. Call for Student specials efthim Company Realtors 314-781-0010.

STUDIO AVAILABLE NOW 5 minutes walk to Hilltop campus; $520/month incl. all the utilities; Free Parking; nice, brights, safe and quiet. For graduate students, staff and faculty only. 314.935.4538 (Tracy). tracy_lotus@hotmail.com.

3 BR 3 BATHROOM APT. in CWE fully furnished with cable TV, approx. 1000 premium channels, internet, unlimited utilities, washer/ dryer and fully equipped contemporary kitchen. Gold Line shuttle around the corner. 1 BR with attatched personal bath for rent. Call 917-412-8953. LOOKING FOR 3 ROOMMATES to share2 story house w/ 4 bedrooms. 5 minute bike to main campus. On gold shuttle line. H/W floors, kitchen, W/D in basement. C/A, cable, backyard. Rent 3 rooms for $800 or pay for one room only $270, $310 or $340 each. Facilities not included. 314-863-6141 or hluo_us@hotmail.com ROOMATE WANTED FOR Spring 2006 in 3BR Apt on Waterman off of Skinker. 5-10 min walk from campus, also right on the gold shuttle line. Rent 1 rm; 2 male roomates. Cable, broadband, W/D, driveway, C/A, furniture, kitchen. Rent: $250 + 1/3 utilities. anyone can apply, students preferred. Contact barapapo@wustl.edu or 914-5887011. ROOMMATE FOR SPRING 2006 wanted to rent 1 room of 3-bedroom apartment with 2 males at 6164 Pershing Ave. 5 min. walk from campus, student preferred. Email lblogh@wustl.edu for details. SPRING SUBLET 1BR IN 3b close to campus on Forsyth Blvd. Free washer/dryer in basement, full kitchen & bath, central air and heating. Available now through June, 1 mo free for subletting. Rent is low. Contact Bill Kimmerle 973-879-9397 or wjkimmer@artsci.wust l.edu.

BRAND NEW DELL 720 color printer in retail box for sale. $49 plus tax on dell.com. Asking only $20 Email huilulu2@yahoo.com. FOR SALE: SWAROVSKI crystal beads necklace and earring set. Please call 314369-6331.

Mon. edition: Wed. edition: Fri. edition:

2 pm Thurs. 2 pm Mon. 2 pm Tues.

Payment All classified ads must be prepaid prior to first insertion by credit card, cash or personal check. Checks should be made payable to

WU Student Media, Inc.

Fax: 314.935.5938 Don’t forget to include a contact number so we can confirm pricing & payment!

BRAND NEW MICROSOFT Wireless Optical Desktop Pro, asking only $65! The package includes one enhanced natural keyboard, one 4-way tilted-wheel optical mouse, and a mireless receiver. It’s new and never been opened. Great gift for the holiday season! Please e-mail henryleesd@gmail.com if interested or for more information. DECORATE YOUR SPACE: Framed fine art posters. Kahlo, Klee, Frankenthaler +. None over $20. Moving & must sell. Please call Natalie at 721-2325. FOR SALE: BEAUTIFUL Persian rug. 314-725-9878 FURNITURE - LIKE NEW! 4 piece neutral bedroom set: queen bed frame, desk, bookcase, nightstand. Priced to sell. Call Marcie: 314-997-7614.

AUTOS FOR SALE: ‘01 SENTRA GXE: Auto, A/C, cruise, CD, dual airbags, keyless entry, power, 20xxx miles, extended warranty and roadside assistance until 10/2007. Asking $7800. Call 378-0969 if interested.

PLEASE BE OUR angel! Local academic couple seeks egg donor of Korean or Japanese descent. $10,000 plus expenses. steph2004@fastmail.us. WANTED: POOL PLAYERS 21+ years interested in competing Jan - May. 5 - 8 people needed for team. 8 ball or 9 ball. $20 yearly fee. Call Anna at 3314.406.4214 or email annao@architectur e.wustl.edu. WANTED: RECORD PLAYER, good condition. Please ontact casey at hargerc@m snotes.wustl.edu to discuss details. WANTED: USED ROAD bike, good condition. Will pay straight cash. Please contact ckkubatz@artsci.wustl.edu.

FEEL GOOD LATELY? Therapeutic Bodywork. Revive. Relax. Feel better! Experienced, professional, licensed. Jennifer S. Peters, LMT. Please call 314-805-0972 or email j e n s p e te r s @ n e t ze r o.n e t . Convenient UCity location. Need a great gift? Gift certificates available! TYPING AND TRANSCRIPTION Services. Expertise in all academic formats. Specializing in qualitative research transcription. Over 30 years experience. Rush jobs welcome! Contact Karen at 314-732-0000 or wkprogress@aol.com. Conveniently located in Central West End.

**#1 SPRING BREAK WEBSITE! Low prices guaranteed. Book 11 people, get 12th trip free! Group discounts for 6+ Please visit www. SpringBreakDiscounts.com or www.LeisureTours.com or call 800-838-8202.

ONE TICKET TO the U2 concert 12/14 at the Savvis Center. Section 102. Email Lakeiter@ar tsci.wustl.edu with any questions.

ANNOUNCING PROVEN SYSTEM! EARN $17,000 in 90 days. Learn more. View our presentation: www.whyresidualincome.c om/givemefreedom PLACE YOUR FREE classified ad with Student Life! WashU students, faculty, and staff can run free classified ads in most categories. Simply email your ad to classif ieds @ s tudlife.com from your WashU email address. Your ad will run free for up to six issues. 30 word limit.

SINGLE? CHECK OUT meetSTLsingles.com, the new hottest place to meet St. Louis area singles.

rent. buy. sell. free. WU students, faculty & staff may place free classified ads in most categories. Just email your ad (from your WU account) to classifieds@studlife.com

classifieds

314.935.6713 • classifieds@studlife.com


12 STUDENT LIFE | CADENZA

Senior Cadenza Editor / Laura Vilines / cadenza@studlife.com

CADEN Z A

WEDNESDAY | DECEMBER 7, 2005

n. a technically brilliant, sometimes improvised solo passage toward the close of a concerto, an exceptionally brilliant part of an artistic work

arts & entertainment

A woman’s body:

an interview with Eve Ensler

By Robbie Gross Theatre Editor

F

or those who plan on staying in town over break and braving the St. Louis winter, there might just be shelter from the storm, feminist-style. From Jan. 3–8, Eve Ensler, playwright and performer of “The Vagina Monologues” and founder of V-Day, an organization to end violence against women and girls, will bring the tour of her new play, “The Good Body,” to our own Edison Theatre. “The Good Body,” which debuted on Broadway in Oct. 2004, is a cross-cultural exploration of the female body and the pressures women face to change it: to shape it, cover it, or expose it. Cadenza spoke to Ms. Ensler by phone from Dallas, Texas.

looking at how women are disempowered, how we’re distracted and taken off track, how we’re made to believe, for example, that if we can just get our bodies perfect and fit everything else will work out, and how it really derails us from power. You know, what’s really been fascinating about this tour is just seeing how many women throughout America, throughout North America, spend their days fixing, tightening and lightening, and flattening and dieting, and everything else when they could have gotten to be running the world. And how this obsession… just how profound and vast and complex it is. C: Does this play have a particularly strong message for college-aged students?

E: Well, I definitely think it’s focused on all women, Cadenza: How do you but there’s a particular think “The Good Body” focus on younger women builds on your other work? because I think that the Why is it important to you? mandate now is the obsession and the kind of proEnsler: It’s a continuation gramming that’s done to of the kind of journey. We’re us. Whether it’s by the kind of corporate capitalist system or religion or by patriarchy, this kind of ongoing pressure and mandate to be skinny and to be blonde and to be perfect…it’s so over the top right now…like the rise in eating disorders.... I was told by a woman last week that a majority of the women in high school get a nose job and a boob job for their graduation—and a car. And I said no. [laughs] We’re talking about high schools at this point. I know how powerful women are, and I see how we’ve been convinced that if we can just fix this THEGOODBODY.COM thing with our body …

THEGOODBODY.COM

really, what we should be doing is fixing the world which is in radically desperate shape right now. C: How do you see U.S. foreign policy in light of its self-defined project to at least in part liberate women? E: As you already know, I’ve spent a lot of time in Afghanistan, and V-Day has supported women over there for a long time. I was actually there under the Taliban and I’ve been back there since. And I think in both situations, Afghanistan and Iraq—in Iraq the situation is worse today than under Saddam Hussein. I mean, if it’s possible, we’ve actually made it worse for women in Iraq. I mean, the constitution as it stands will actually reverse laws that were fairly liberating under Saddam Hussein, and in fact it was one of the most liberal countries in the Middle East for women. And now the Iraqi constitution, with the implication of Sharia law and everything else, will absolutely set women back.

We [at V-Day] are supporting women, and we actually are just about to open with a partner [in Iraq] who we’re supporting…the first satellite women’s TV station. And we’ve been supporting her and opening shelters for women since the U.S. bombing....In Afghanistan, every report I get says the Taliban is on the rise, we’ve been searching for Al Qaeda operatives who are no longer in Afghanistan—they’ve moved to Iraq, as you know. And we’ve taken our eyes off the Taliban and they are at large. Women are still wearing burkas because they’re still in terror. We have not addressed the fundamental issues of poverty, and as long as women are poor and in desperate straits they will always be controlled and violated and unfree. So until you address those kinds of principles it’s a sham, it’s a sham. C: So is the feminist message failing to take on a global dimension? E: Well, you know that the play for V-Day has been done in 88 countries at this point. And if you go to the Web and see the countries that are doing it this year, it’s pretty amazing….We just opened the Karameh program, which is an Arabic name for dignity. We just opened our first offices…in Egypt, and we had a huge conference there in July, and then we opened the first safe house for battered women, with women on the ground there, and did a leadership conference in Beirut….So the V-Day message is spreading far and wide in the Middle East. It’s really beginning to happen, and it’s very

exciting. Very exciting. C: In spite of the foreign policy, then, maybe? E: Exactly. Exactly. I simply do not believe that this government fought a war to liberate the women of Afghanistan or Iraq when they’re trying to desecrate the Violence Against Women Act in America….It’s hard to believe that they’d now care about women in Iraq. Why? Based on what? C: Why have you stuck with theatre as the primary venue for your ideas? E: It’s interesting. I’ve done a few documentaries. You know we did a documentary on women in prison, and “The Vagina Monologues” was a documentary, and we just did this “Until the Violence Stops” documentary as well. But you know, I am a believer in theatre…and I think the reason is because…it really has the potential for social change in the moment. It has the potential to

THEGOODBODY.COM

change your body, to change something inside you. There’s something inherently revolutionary about the theatre, because you exist in a community in the same moment with a group of strangers who are all there together in the room, in the present tense. There is something vital that can happen and does happen…. And look, I’ve seen what’s happened with “The Vagina Monologues.” I mean, come on—30 million dollars [raised for V-Day] in eight years. I know it has to do with theatre and the particular energy and vitality and prism through which words and energy get communicated. It’s not polarizing. It doesn’t lock people into this or that. It allows people to laugh or to feel differently. C: I know a lot of people are excited for you to come. E: I’m very excited. You know, my mother’s from Missouri….I’m very excited to be coming.

THEGOODBODY.COM

-Cadenza reporter Kate McCabe contributed to this article.

Roadtripping with with aa transsexually transsexually desperate desperate housewife: housewife: Roadtripping Duncan Tucker on his debut film ‘Transamerica’ By Pat Kennedy Cadenza Reporter “Transamerica” is not your typical road-trip movie—at least, it doesn’t appear to be at first. “Desperate Housewives” star Felicity Huffman plays a transsexual woman (that is, she was named Stan but now calls herself Bree) who is about to undergo sexual reassignment surgery to become a fullfledged woman—until she discovers that she fathered a son when still a man. Confused yet? With the suggestion of her therapist, Bree must resolve the issue of her newly discovered son, Toby, before she undergoes surgery. Bree finds Toby in New York, prostituting himself for drugs and money. The film focuses on the relationship these two characters develop as they drive cross-country from New York to California, Bree’s home and the place where Toby hopes to start an adult film career. Here’s what director Duncan Tucker had to say of his full-length film debut: Cadenza: You have written short stories, created pieces of artwork and done photography. Was writing and directing a film just the next step? Tucker: In my life, I’ve had every odd job that you can mention, and I’ve always gravitated towards artistic things. But I’ve also worked

in nonartistic things, and I’ve lived in various places in the world. I worked as a cabin boy on a cruise ship, and I’ve bumped around the South Pacific and all around the world. Then a few years ago I was thinking, how can I put together the things I love—pictures, music and stories—all in one job? And directing was a no-brainer solution. C: What do you hope to accomplish or portray through this story? T: Interestingly, before I even knew that I was going to write a transsexual woman as the main character—because the movie is not about transsexuality, although it so happens that a trans woman is the main character—it’s really about growing up and coming home, about family and self-acceptance. These are pretty universal themes. I like to call this movie the ‘Lord of the Rings’ of tranny movies, because it’s a quest sort of film. I like stories with a capital ‘S,’ stories you’d tell a kid, and they’d say with wide eyes, ‘What’s going to happen next?’ I think it’s kind of an adventure film. C: How did you come up with the idea of writing a movie that has a transsexual protagonist? T: I met this trans woman who told me she was trans, and a light bulb went off. So I started doing

a lot of research, and I thought, well, talk about a long journey that you’d have to make towards selfacceptance in being transsexual. C: You mentioned research— how much research on transsexuality did you do for the film? T: First, I read around a couple dozen different books on the topic. I was also trying to get invited to go to a transsexual support group in New York, but they’re very selfprotective, and I couldn’t get into one. They didn’t want just some guy coming in, and these women were often stealth, they weren’t out as trans women. Finally, through a friend of a friend and their friends, I met and talked to dozens of trans women. I heard stories that were hilarious and tragic—sometimes both at the same time—and this helped me evolve the character of Bree. C: After casting Felicity Huffman as Bree, how did she go about acting as a man who acts like a woman, being already a woman herself? T: You know, she asked the same question when I first talked to her. The primary thing we tried to focus on was the emotional truth of the character, rather then the specific gender issues. Who is this woman? What is she feeling? Where is she on her emotional

WWW.HGLCF.ORG

Toby, the teenage drug-addicted runaway, with his newly discovered father-turnedtransgendered-woman. journey? All the rest were just externals, and I think that gave Felicity such comfort that I had this focus. She was able to study with trans women in the eight weeks of pre-production, however, and she got down the walk and the talk and the posture, gestures and voice. The good thing was that Felicity never got bogged down into just mimicry, like some other ‘transformative’ performances that just seem like mimicry to me. She was really inhabiting the skin of this person.

C: I think Huffman does do a good job in the role and definitely allows some humor in it as well. T: Yeah, during a hard scene, Felicity sometimes would be sobbing herself off set, just feeling so deeply for her character Bree. It was quite amazing. Yet, the woman loves a gag. She’s always willing to take a fall, and the movie’s hopefully really fucking funny because of this.


Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.