Green, Keri, The Presence of Time Greco, Michael, March 13th 2020.……………………………………………………………………………………6

The Presence of Time

Keri Green

The vibration of my phone felt as if someone was shaking the bottom of my bed repeatedly. I jumpedup,realizing there were already two missed phone calls and two text messages; it was the third phone call that startled me. "Hello,” was barely out of my dry mouth but my lips motioned the wordhello, so it was repeated after clearing my throat, “Hello?!”

“We can't find him, he is not in his room,'' said the loud,quivering voice.

“What are you talking about?” was my reply. Immediately I satup in my bed,wiping the sleep from my eyes.“Who are you talking about?”

“Nick. We can't find him and he's not in his room and I know he was here when I left yesterday, but we can't find him,” the anxious voice quivered through the speaker of the phone.

Turning towards the clock,the bright blue glow showed 6:13 a.m. Monday morning. Suddenly there was another voice in the distance, but this one was stern,saying, “Why did you wake her up? I'm handling it!” The quivering voice responded, “Well, she needs to know.”

Softly asking if everything was alright,the distant voice was no longer so distant and replied, “Nick is fine and he is at the hospital.I don't know why they keep calling you. They were told not to call you and use me first and that was not an emergencysituation that I could not have handled.” We jokingly laughed because we know it will take time before they correctly follow the chain of command. They will continue to call especially since my phone number has to be accessible. Another glimpse at the clock and I realizemore time has passed. It is now 6:49 a.m. and class begins at 8 a.m. Luckily due to the pandemic, class is now online so there was no need to rush out of the house and drive frantically to get the best parking spot in the lot. Laying back down onto the soft pillows and pulling the weighted blanket over my legs, there was hope the next hour would be better than the first one. Trying to relax before fully committing to waking up, there was hope of being comforted by the bed, pillows,and blanket. My eyes were closed tight so as notto look at the clock. The clock now says 7:45 a.m. and I still need to get ready for class during a pandemic! I feellike a schoolgirl wanting to look good for the first day of class; this is the first official web meeting so anxiety and uncertainty of what to expect set in. The days of showing off new school clothes to your peers used to be a nice confidence booster. Today, confidence would be boosted just by being on time and online for the classes. The moment has arrived and it is 8 a.m.; eager to begin, the button to join the meeting icon appears. It is pressed and immediately a feeling of video overload from all the faces showing on the screen happened with thoughts of MSNBC and the ticker that shows up on the screen; too much movement is going on. Then, there is a face trying to hide behind a binder with a cloud of smoke rising from the right side of the binder and the voice in my head says, “Wow, she’s vaping. Does she know we can see her?”Then, there is a baby’s hand hitting at her mother's face and the mother is pulling away from her while trying to adjust the image on the screen. Then, there's feet that show up behind someone's head and next there is a loud echo that is emitting over thespeakers. First, it is very loud

and then it becomesa softer, repeated phrase from the instructor saying “Can, can you turn off your mic, can you turn off your mic, someone has their microphone on. ”Finally, the screen with the feet disappearsand the echoing stops while a gray image shows in a box. Just within the first two minutes there is so much distraction from people moving all over the screen; mics beeping and picking up feedback haveme thinking this is really going to be an experience. This brings back memories of sitting in classrooms with dusty chalkboards, small desks with gum stuck on them, wooden tables and chairs, people going to and from the pencil sharpener, and those were the old days of learning. Times have changed! A vision of a silhouette appeared as a reflection of the monitor screen. I turnto see who is in the room with me and barely get a glimpse of a body darting past saying, “Is that on? Are you live? Can they hear me?”

“They can hear you and see you, it's a web meeting and I'm on live.”

“So, you mean the world just saw me in my boxers?”

“I guess so if that's what you have on.” The soft sound of chuckles and laughter was heard through the monitor and speakers; sorry technical difficulties and the video was stopped. Personally, after stopping the video, a long sigh of disbelief mixed with relief was let out; this is not going to be as smooth as planned with all the faces on and off the screen and the family roaming in the house. There were too many distractions and the camerahad to be adjusted and more time was spent getting things together for this new style of learning during a pandemic. Now, the camera was one that was attached via USB port and it had to be propped up on something due to the monitor being a 70-inch smarttelevision; it just would not attach properly. The mouse is wireless and the keyboard is wireless,so I had to ask my son to adjust everything so it would fit securely and then it could go back on live video footage. The video playing icon is pressed and the screen shows a preview of comfortable pillows that surround me on the sofa.

A deep sounding voice alerts me and says, “Mom, I need my camera back. I have to video stream.” Looking at the clock on the screen, the time says 8:40am and the first thought in my head is,“When is the time going to ever end?” This is my first web meeting and it did not go as planned. My reply is, “Okay, let’s print out my materials for class first and then you can have everything.”Feeling defeated and not wanting anyone to know, the syllabus and handouts were printed and looked over to ensure it matched what the instructor was discussing. The instructor then says, “Okay see you next week, make sure your cameras are turned on because I need to see your faces. ”Then she waved goodbye to everyone. As the first class came to an end, the anticipation of what the remaining three classes would hold had my heart racing and my mind wandering. Understanding how the new education platform works has me reminiscing of prior days sitting in the classroom. The sound of pages flipping in books, teachers standing in front of the classroom, walking the floor,and only writing what they perceived as important information on the chalkboard is a time not forgotten. The only technology was a standard calculator and a mechanical pencil,and you were not allowed to use the calculator for everything. Today, we use computers with built in video or webcams, cell phones and laptops; that is just the way it is. Guessing it will be like riding a bike when you fall off and then you get back on it; you go a little further and a little faster and next thing you know you are headed in the right

direction. Everything just takes a little time. Fortunately, life is a lesson and over time we all can learnthe presence of time during a pandemic!