Tangram Family F R O M O N E PA R E N T T O A N O T H E R
Erika Hargis
Lora Apodaca
Adrien Moreira
Derek Todero
Alison Hickman
Ashley Redieck
Amanda Pierce
Gilbert Morales
Alyssa Armesto
Tangram Family: From one Parent to Another
Many of our best and brightest employees are also parents. With the shift to virtual education and more kids at home than ever, working parents across the nation and globe have been thrust into the new role of being both a full-time employee and a full-time parent (and sometimes a teacher) within their own home. It is no surprise that this shift brings a plethora of challenges as people find themselves juggling their work and their children. We’ve always prided ourselves on our people and culture—Tangram is a tightknit family that values both what goes on within our walls and beyond them, in the professional sphere as well as personal. However, we’re in unchartered territory and at times, we’re not sure of the best way to support our company’s families. Sometimes it feels messy, a concept that every working parent is likely familiar with. What we are certain about is that we’re doing our best as an organization during this time, and parents are also doing their best despite the circumstances. At times it’s chaotic, and often untidy, but the strength that our people embody is clear and inspiring. We’d like to share some of our parents’ quarantine stories, tips and tricks as a way to encourage other working parents and bring some joy, humor and relatability to this shared experience. Life feels uncertain and sometimes unmanageable, but we hope this serves as a reminder that we’re in this together. And by the way, you’re doing amazing.
With Love, The Tangram Family
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C O NT E N T S
Mark Coxon 04
Lupe Morfin 20
Amanda Pierce 06
Lora Apodaca 22
Derek Todero 08
Alyssa Armesto 24
Denise Mayer 10
Erika Hargis 26
Alison Hickman 12
L:indsey Sage 28
Amber Jones 14
Kimberly Barnow 30
An Appeal to CEO’s from a Working Mother 16
Parenting Group Resources 32
Mark Coxon
Sales Director, Tangram Technology We have been varying activities all quarantine to try and keep things feeling as normal as possible. Our family always tries to make light of situations by having fun (if you don’t laugh, you cry, right?!) Charlie’s Angels mask poses, picnics for the family, and reading is part of the daily routine before any screens light up. My son and youngest daughter have been starting the day
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running at the lake with me and my oldest loves to cook and bake, so she’s been hanging in the kitchen a lot. She also got a job at Chick-Fil-A, which helps her pass the time in the evenings. Now that school has started again, we’ve been enforcing half the day on Zoom and homework before FaceTiming with friends or getting Xbox time in.
Cade Age 14
Faith Age 16
Holly Age 11
Owen aka Spiderman Age 3
Amanda Pierce Design Team Lead
This is Owen and he has a message for you: “The past few months have been pretty wild for everyone so I’m trying to be on best behavior at home. My parents have tasked me to play with my little brother, Declan, and fight off the bad guys so that they can get their work done. I protect Declan from the Green Goblin, Doc Ock, and Kingpin, which is no small
feat. And you probably guessed it… the biggest thing that I’ve learned through all of this is that with great power, comes great responsibility!” (For the record, his mommy is a superhero too.)
Declan 10 Mos
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Derek Todero
Sales Director, Tangram Construction Trades To break up the monotony of all of the time spent at home, my family celebrates the weekends with a new tradition called “Weekend Lights.” Every Friday (or eve of a holiday weekend) @ 4pm, the entire family gathers and we countdown 5...4...3...2...1...WEEKEND!!! At this point, everyone hugs and celebrates the beginning of the weekend. All work is put away. The den and living room are now available for the kids to build forts and/or set up as their new temporary bedroom if they want. Breakfast is served anytime. Video game systems are running wild. It’s basically controlled chaos until 9pm Sunday night when we shut it down and the house turns back to normal. We’ve been doing this for a while now and the entire family looks forward to the weekly countdown which marks the beginning of something great. While it began in quarantine, it’ll be a tradition we’ll keep doing for years to come.
Madelyn Age 18
Dekker + Davis Age 6 + 9
Miguel Angel & Gabriel Age 5
Denise Mayer Project Manager
Miguel Angel and Gabriel are twins and they recently started Kindergarten. We typically take walks during our lunch break or after school and donate old books to a neighborhood donation cabinet.
I also prep snack trays for them so they don’t interrupt me as often during conference calls that fall within their 15 min break and nutrition break before lunch. I have fun making them and the boys definitely have fun eating them. Got to stay organized with high energy twins!
They both are little artists in the making, so I buy wooden figures for them to paint. It keeps them busy while I squeeze some calls in!
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Alison Hickman Bakersfield Regional Manager
Our quarantine has been a juggling game, but I’m really fortunate to have the most helpful husband and older kids to take care of the day-to-day! We’re a family of seven, so when we lose our quarantine cool, we escape to the beach with a pizza. Lots of food and snacks (and drinks for mom) in general. We even got creative and had an In-N-Out driveway picnic, which was a huge success, to no surprise.
When my husband and I have to buckle down and have peace and quiet for our Zoom calls, we resort to handing our babysitters (cellphones) over to our youngest children, Thorin and Truen, pictured on top of the cabinets. They graduated preschool and kindergarten this year so we had to take graduation pictures in the poppies of course! As for our son, Talan, he is a competitive swimmer and when his club and all of the pools shut down, we borrowed a wetsuit and had him keep practicing in a friend’s pool that was longer and better for laps than ours.
Talan Age 14
Thorin + Truen Age 5 + 4
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Trajan Age 15
Teague Age 12
Kenzie Age 8
Cooper Age 10
Amber Jones VP, Sales + Education
Kenzie and Cooper have been occupying themselves with puzzles, fort building, dress up and at-home P.E. The kids and I also blew up a bunch of balloons and then popped them after a few days of play. From blowing them up, to playing, to cleaning up, it definitely kept the kids busy. Simple is sometimes best!
Tangram Family: From one Parent to Another
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An Appeal to CEO’s From a Working Mother During COVID-19 Amber Jones
As a strong, working mother of two, I have proudly grown my career as I have grown my family. I‘ve dismissed the naysayers who said I couldn’t be a good mom plus a good executive, and I shrugged them off as I was promoted from Salesperson to Sales Director to VP of Sales.
As we slipped into April and May, I watched as my children slowly pulled away from reality and leaned hard into video games and FaceTime. With only 90 minutes or so of schoolwork to do each day, it left them with 6+ hours to fill while I Zoomed my life away upstairs.
As proud as I am of how I’ve represented myself and all working mothers up to this point, I feel I must give voice to this population in another way now. I have never felt so bound up in my life as I do with the news that continues to roll out about COVID-19, and I would like to take the liberty of sharing my experience on behalf of the mothers of your organizations.
What did they do? They went into the Matrix and only came out for snack time. At eight and nine years old, I don’t blame my kids for wanting to play Fortnite and Roblox all day. And I can’t blame them for not being very good at knowing when it’s been too long on a device. At these ages, they shouldn’t be parenting themselves, but in 2020 I’m hard pressed to find someone who can parent them while I work.
Coping with Unprecedented Change Balancing Multiple Priorities Let me start at the beginning. I will admit that, when the pandemic began to shut down life as we knew it, I didn’t hate the idea of working at home with my kids “going to school” 10 feet from me. I didn’t even mind that my husband was still going to work every day and leaving me with the kids. To be honest, all this time spent with my kids was unprecedented due to my normal work schedule, and I welcomed the opportunity to bond with them. I did what most moms started to do in March 2020. I sat down and created an adorable little whiteboard schedule that blocked off the day for my kids. It included schoolwork time, play time, lunch, reading, free play, etc. Did they follow it? Sure, for the first week. After that, not only did they not want the whiteboard, but I couldn’t think of enough new ideas to make the whiteboard plan sound remotely appealing to any of us.
This year, it feels like the societal “norm” that was promised to parents for generations has been broken. We’re left cradling our dreams in our arms, forced to choose which ones are most important and which ones take precedent over the others. As I look down to see what I’m holding, I see these: • My husband of 11 years and the job he loves that is out of the house
• My career that I love and have worked so hard at for over 13 years
• My two children, their happiness, education and health
• My sanity (really hoping not to lose this one)
Tangram Family: From one Parent to Another
• My happiness
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School has restarted, and I’m deeply concerned that what has gotten me through the last five months may not get me through the next five. I’m incredibly lucky to have a fabulous support system; not everyone in my position does. My kids have spent most of their summer break away from home with different grandparents and aunts, enjoying their time so I can focus on work. And while that’s been an okay system, I didn’t have kids for someone else to raise them. When I yearned for children, I had every intention of seeing them morning and night, being there for every milestone, heartbreak and joy, as I would imagine most parents intend. And while I appreciate the heck out of my family for their generous offers, I can’t imagine spending every week without my kids. As the days progress and any hope of returning to life pre-pandemic is muddied, I’m beginning to realize that all those bullet-pointed dreams and priorities may not survive simultaneously. No matter how many games of Tetris I play with that list, I know that there is no way that I can fit more than three in the frame at once. Yesterday, I heard an analogy that we are only at the bottom of the second inning of COVID in America, and my heart sank.
Building a Support System So, ladies and gentlemen, we are stuck right smack in the middle of a rock and hard place, and something’s got to give. I’m having a hard time figuring out which way to turn. I feel confused and frustrated a lot of the time, and that’s not who I am. And I know I’m not alone.
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What concerns me most is that strong, working women like myself will be disproportionately affected. We have fought tirelessly for generations to claim our space in the workforce. But after all we’ve accomplished, I am seeing more and more women recoil back into their homes to bear the weight of childcare and become makeshift teachers. Here is my ask to you, CEO. I’ve shared my experience as well as a vulnerable side of me in hopes that I can give a voice to women who don’t feel they have one. I ask that you look around at the working mothers of your organizations and make sure that quitting isn’t on their mind. If it is, I ask that you lend an ear and carve out some time to craft sustainable solutions that will keep our workplaces diverse and our companies progressing into the future. Some ideas might include fun activities for kids related to the business that could form the foundation for a future career interest, accommodation in scheduling to take care of the emotional and health needs of the children, a companysponsored online community or forum for moms to share tips, experiences and concerns. Use your imagination, especially those of you who are parents. Most importantly is a reminder to lead with empathy. Encourage open and frequent discussion with your staff about how this situation is affecting their lives (personal and professional). And, finally, offer some flexibility. We’ve all had to pivot our companies, so let’s enable our employees to pivot with us.
Tangram Family: From one Parent to Another
It’s imperative to acknowledge that, while we’re all in the same COVID storm, we are not all in the same boat. Everyone’s situation is unique, and it is crucial that you understand the waves that your people are riding as they navigate through 2020. So, please, check in with your moms. They need you, and I’m sure you need them. Sincerely and hopefully,
Amber Jones
VP Sales + Education, Tangram Interiors
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Delanee Age 9
Lupe Morfin Sales Executive
My daughters are completely different and they actually have adapted to this virtual learning differently.
Delanee, on the other hand, is a free spirit kind of girl and goes with the flow. Her classes are from 8am-3:30m with many breaks.
Devenee is really organized and has a routine. Her classes are from 8am-12:30pm with only 5 minute breaks in between. She stays in her room and has a desk set-up and a Node chair! These are the two areas she uses during school or for homework, but she always sets the mood with her lighting.
She wanders around the house, but her favorite spot is her closet nook. She spends hours there and does her homework/reading. During class, she works at her desk, but needs a lot of notes.
Devenee Age 15
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Lora Apodaca Executive Assistant
Since the shutdowns in California, my husband has not been able to safely reopen and operate his business. So, with me working from home, him not working from home, and our almost six-year-old daughter, Lily, out of school over the summer, we were—to say the least—going CRAZY. After school started back up in September, him not working actually became a blessing in disguise. Although we could very much use the income, managing our daughter’s distanced learning schedule while maintaining a high level of productivity in my job would be virtually impossible to balance if he were also working full-time. So, while it’s challenging at times, we are lucky that he is able to shepherd Lily through the strange experience of learning via
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computer and endless Zoom sessions. He is a saint in my eyes for doing so. Although we know that our situation could certainly be a lot harder, there is no shortfall of frustrations in our household. We are a family of three living in an 800-square-foot loft with no doors or separation of space. Yes, you read that correctly. So naturally, there are many moments when we all feel over it (and over each other). Luckily, one activity Lily absolutely loves is working on art projects of all types. In those moments where we really need a break from one another, we roll out a huge canvas onto the floor, dump out all of her paints and supplies, and let her go to town! It keeps her occupied for at least an hour (or more!) and gives mom and dad that much needed break to finish up that never-ending to-do list.
Tangram Family: From one Parent to Another
Lily Age 6
Greyson Age 2
Alyssa Armesto Fresno General Manager
I keep Greyson busy with anything that occupies his hands—a flashcard/block set, Play-Doh, painting, coloring, fort building, magnetic blocks (a fun alternative to Legos). He has a newfound love of bugs so we got him a bug box as well. I typically can get through a call while he’s bug-searching in the backyard so it’s been a huge success. When TV is permitted, Blippi on YouTube has also been a big hit. It’s a high-energy guy who teaches kids about different subjects, so, while I may or may not be over the hyperactive host, it’s an entertaining and educational show that kids seem to love. Lastly, I’ve been taking Greyson on walks while I’m on calls. It gets him out of the house to let out some energy while I’m able to be tuned into the call.
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Erika Hargis Sales Executive
I call these snaps “Lowering Expectations and Letting our Dining Table Become Her Canvas” and “Baby Ninja Warrior.” It’s taken a lot of creativity, patience and throwing expectations to the wind to entertain these kiddos without going insane. Plus, now that our oldest has started distance learning school, I’m juggling both of our Zoom calls and the two little ones. It’s total chaos, but we’re making it work!
Kaden Age 10
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Chandler Age 4
Bauer 20 Mos
Graham 21 Mos
Lindsey Sage
VP, Business Development Graham is almost two so I’ve had my hands pretty full during quarantine. I’ve picked up various methods along the way to keep him occupied at home while I work, like playing with learning toys and activities from Monti Kids, building tents and forts, playing hide-and-seek, and sometimes I let him go to town by feeding himself something messy because it keeps him occupied for a while (yogurt has been a recent crowd pleaser).
mountains in Temecula. He absolutely loved the campfire and playing in water buckets and dirt—and he discovered bubbles, his new favorite thing!
A couple months back, we were feeling cooped up in the house so I took Graham camping for the first time over the Fourth of July weekend in Joshua Tree, and again in August to the
I think the visits with Mitchel were his favorite. He had a blast planting sunflower seeds, picking oranges, playing in the pool, and running around with the dogs!
We also take a daily walk around the block, to Mother’s Beach or to Long Beach’s local parks to run around and burn off some energy.
Tangram Family: From one Parent to Another
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Kimberly Barnow Sales Executive
A few snapshots of our chaos! We’ve been trying to keep Rowan’s creative mind exercised. Crafts, at-home dance parties, science experiments and hair tutorials are making the days fly by. It’s tough, but we’ve really tried to enjoy this time together. Not to mention, its pretty fun being able to relive my childhood activities with our daughter. We even had a COVID-themed photoshoot, see if you recognize any familiar items from the last seven months of your life!
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Tangram Family: From one Parent to Another
Rowan Age 5
TANGRAM PARENTING GROUP RESOURCES
“We are all in the same storm, but not in the same boat. We all will have to navigate through this, some easier than others, but I believe there is a light at the end.� - Amber Jones When it was announced that school shutdowns would extend through the fall, Tangram launched a Parenting Group, led by Amber Jones, VP of Sales and mother of two, to allow for open dialogue and honest around the situation. It became a space for parents to express the difficulties they were facing at home and begin a conversation about possible solutions. Additionally, it allowed for parents to express their expectations of Tangram. What did it come down to? Empathy and flexibility with a side of patience. Through this group, Tangram heard the needs of all working parents and, in response, allowed for each
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parent to have the freedom to re-arrange their schedule to work best for them and their family. While this is only the beginning, and it certainly involves a learning curve, we look forward to continue listening and supporting our parents to the best of our ability. We invite you to take a deeper look into topics the Parenting Group discussed and ideas they came up with.
Tangram Family: From one Parent to Another
TANGRAM EXPECTATIONS OF PARENTS IN THE FALL
1. COMMUNICATION. It will be key that you communicate your schedule and plans for the day/ week to your manager and your internal team. Use your calendar to block off school times so the team knows what to expect.
3. Use your resources – reach out to each other if you need emotional support. #TangramTogether is better than any of us alone.
2. If the schedule just won’t work for you and your family, be vocal with your manager. We can possibly find you someone to do work share with.
IDEAS FOR ENRICHMENT/EDUCATIONAL ENTERTAINMENT
Tip: Start your days with a family work out! Get the kids’ wiggles out BEFORE you all sit down to work and learn. 1. The Covid nineTEEN Project offers free activities and tutoring for kids led by high school volunteers. https://sites.google.com/view/covidnineteenproject/home 2. Pen Pals. We set up an shared file for parents to include some details about their kids to be paired with other kids as pen pals. So many kids are missing their friends so this helps bridge the social gap! 3. Find a local musician that can do a Zoom music lesson with your child and some friends. 4. Work with the parents in your child’s assigned class to find a parent to co-teach with, freeing up a few days for both of you to work.
6. YouTube has great kid-friendly yoga classes for free. Check out Cosmic Yoga. 7. Virtually-guided cooking classes are a great way for kids to keep their hands busy as they learn new skills. 8. A list of the best free online classes for all ages of children: https://www.fatherly.com/love-money/best-onlineeducation-classes-children-coronavirus/ 9. Another great list: https://www.timeout.com/new-yorkkids/things-to-do/online-classes-for-kids (Kahn Academy Learning App, ABCmouse, etc.)
5. Many high school students are looking for volunteer credits and may be willing to help tutor your younger child. 33
Tangram Family F R O M O N E PA R E N T T O A N O T H E R
TA N G R A M I N T E R I O R S . C O M