Issue 4, the Black & Gold, Volume 91

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Volume 91

Sports

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Issue 4

Photo: K. Raymond

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2011 MIPA Spartan Award Winner

Photo : K. R

After winning the BNC championship, Central’s hockey team continues to work hard on the ice. And the boys basketball team has continuously improved on strategy and teamwork to, and the young team is gaining experience. Relive their glory, page 12.

February 7, 2012

Traverse City Central High School 1150 Milliken Drive, Traverse City, Michigan 49686

Newsline

Performing for the Chamber of Commerce dinner, area schools’ music programs come together to perform. Central’s band, chorale, Choral-Aires, orchestra, and Grease cast were the stars of the evening. Re-live their performances, page 8.

‘CANstruction’ for a cause

Feature

Photo: A. Hilden

Bid farewell to a technology teacher, and take an in-depth look into the treasures that students thrifted. Also, look ahead to next year with Central’s new Writers’ On Front class, all on page 11.

Board game battles Photo: courtesy of Logan Core ‘12

Katie Ludwig, Breanna Argue, Carrie Wynkoop and Ashley Reed, all ‘15, build their basketball-themed structure at the Grand Traverse Mall. Huntington Bank donated 1,340 cans to the freshman girls basketball. There were eight other groups participating in the Father Fred ‘CANstruction,’ an event that also took place in many other cities. “It was a great feeling knowing that I was doing something good for our community and that would make a difference for people who are in need,” Argue said.

Bayfront train is leaving the station

As Traverse City prepares to move forward with a Bayfront renovation that’s been in the works for years, citizens’ excitement is tinged with sadness about losing the “Spirit of Traverse City” train in Clinch Park Photo: M. Kachadurian

Math teacher Harold Lalonde’s room has been hosting an epic chess tournament in C-207. The tournament is an opportunity for students take on their teachers in intellectual combat. “I like chess because it’s challenging,” Chris Hall ‘14 said. “You have to think a step ahead the whole game, and you learn something new every time you play, even if you lose.”

Freshmen take the lead

Photo: K. Raymond

Freshmen Round tables: Incoming freshmen will showcase their work during student-led conferences in advisory called Freshmen Roundtables, which are meetings with parents and advisors to discuss academics, goals and concerns. “I think the Freshmen Roundtables are a great way to get students ready for real world situations like job interviews,” Austin Bluemel ‘15 (right) said.

Special day for athletes

Fiona Muha

C Staff Reporter

Children eagerly awaiting a ride will have to wave goodbye to the “Spirit of Traverse City” as their beloved train leaves the station for the last time, to be replaced with a new splash pad sprinkler in Clinch Park. According to city officials the beloved “Spirit of Traverse City” mini steam train must be removed from Clinch Park for safety reasons. “We had concerns of train-pedestrian crashes and possible serious injuries,” Soyring said. “Especially in areas where children would be running about.” The City Commission is now hopeful that a private group will step up and provide a new location for the train, and the monetary support to establish it. There is talk that the train may be transferred to the Civic Center by Grand Traverse County. Russ Soyring, Director of City Planning, said the city’s goals in renovating the waterfront were to make it more attractive and interesting for residents and visitors year round. “If people are comfortable and finding the surroundings to be entertaining, people will stay longer.”

More than five years ago, the Traverse City Board of Commissioners began the process of redesigning Traverse City’s Bayfront with an initiative called “Your Bay, Your Say.” The meetings generated the idea to remodel the two miles of public waterfront. A committee, including commissioners such as City Commissioner Jim Carruthers, moved the idea forward. “It’s been this evolving process for the past five years,” Carruthers said. “There’s a process to everything: plan it out and then engineer it, figure out the contract and build it.” Parks and Recreation members then got involved and the group prioritized items on the list of citizens’ interests to create their own official list. The Bayfront planning discussion was the next step, where Commissioners hired another consultant to look into designing some of these features. All of this led to a 50-50 grant from the Michigan Natural Resources Trust Fund and the Downtown Development Authority, and the twenty-five page Bayfront plan, made with consultant Hamilton Anderson. The current proposal is to revamp the Bayfont, which stretches from the West End beach area to the Senior Center, in multiple

phases. Carruthers said that right now, the City is trying to decide what aspects to move forward with. To get the project moving and accommodate the city’s limited budget, Carruthers said that the committee wants to break the project into “chunks” that can be done for $2-3 million, if money and support can be raised. Phase One focuses on Clinch Park; plans include building a bathhouse, splash pad, relocating the TART Trail more centrally in the park, redirecting the TART trail fountain into a stream and shifting parking. “Now we’re just trying to decide what we can afford,” Carruthers said. “We are a summer resort tourist destination. They want to have entertainment, they want to have concessions, they want to have things to do.” Despite the overall benefits of these changes, for some city residents, losing the train is a big disappointment. “I used to live downstate and when I used to come up here to visit my family, the only thing I was old enough to do was the zoo and the train,” Juline Kotarski ‘12 said. “They took away the zoo and the train was left, but now that they want to take the train away. It’s like they’re taking away my childhood and an

Photo: A. Hilden

iconic part of our town.” Bayfront Planning Committee members understand that they can’t please everyone, so their job is to please as many people as is feasible. “There are different opinions out there, ” Carruthers said. “Some people feel we should do nothing, other people feel we should do more than what we’re doing. Hopefully, we’re gonna try to get this going this summer season, make something of these

plans and move forward with them.” The entire plan for the Bayfront is estimated to cost $26 million, but the amount raised so far from foundations and grants is about $2 million dollars. The city is looking for an additional million before Phase One can get underway. “The plans we are developing today,” Soyring said, “will impact us for decades ahead.”

North Prep Academy: new charter school for TCAPS? Elena Rothney Staff Reporter

Photo: S. Hutchison

At Special Olympics last month, Central student Clayton Harhold ‘13 (center) competed in both the snowshoeing and skiing events. “My favorite part was that I ran twice and my mom cheered for me the whole time,” Harhold said. Many Central students also volunteered at the games, More important, they were “Special O” fans, cheering the athletes on. Go Clayton! Briefs: C. Hansen

In an effort to prepare students for a competitive, ever-changing world, TCAPS has dramatically transformed curriculum and student offerings. Netbooks, advisory, academies and an expanding world language program are all recent developments. Yesterday a special committee comprised of TCAPS board members, teachers and parents met to decide the fate of the proposed Charter school, North Prep Academy. The Black & Gold’s deadline was last Friday. Last fall, West Principal Joe Tibaldi requested

that TCAPS consider a charter. If the proposal passed, Tibaldi and some of his current staff at West will move to the new school. North Prep Academy is slated to be located in the building that currently houses Traverse City College Preparatory Academy by Centre Ice. As of press time, Tibaldi and Puckett declined to comment on the specifics of the school to avoid influencing the outcome. School Board trustee Gary Appel admitted that he didn’t know all of the details about the proposed school, but shared the specifics of the long process that the proposal would go through if approved. “If they recommend that the proposal move forward, it will be considered by the board’s curriculum committee,” Appel said, “If cur-

riculum moves it forward, it will then go to the Human Resources (HR) and Policy committee that I chair. If HR and Policy moves it forward, it will finally go to the full board.” As with the high schools’ academies and advisories, TCAPS’ rationale for the proposed charter school is to offer more diverse curriculum options within the district. Greenspire was cited as an example, with its scientific emphasis on the water sheds of Traverse City. “I strongly supported chartering Greenspire because it is innovative and offers families something not available at TCAPS. I am certain the review committee is seriously weighing the potential benefits and costs of the North Prep application,” Appel said.


2 Opinion

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

Our View

Graphic: J. Murray

Student sections at Central-West basketball games are intense -- both crowds sling cheers and aim to outdo the crosstown rival. While students show up in droves to support their teams, there’s an undeniable competition, not just on the court, but between the student fan sections. Next week, however, Superfans and Bleacher Creatures will compete in a whole new arena – recycling. The week-long contest kicks off Feb. 13 and the entire student section of the school that collects the most plastic bottles for recycling will win tshirts and a trophy, as well as a “special surprise” during hafltime of the crosstown showdown scheduled for Feb. 23. Nobody would argue that ramping up recycling at Central is a good thing. However, it’s not enough to toss a few green bins in the cafeteria and hope an environmentalist culture catches on. Harnessing the electricity of the student body in the week leading up to the final crosstown showdown might just be enough to spark change. Sure, the idea of a recycling trophy is a little hokey, but if bottle collection catches on with students, everyone stands to benefit. If you want to participate in the project, bring your plastic bottles to the cafeteria from Feb. 13-17.

Local – Northern Michigan Mourns Death of Local Soldier:

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Graphic: J. Murray

Super PACs: Too much power in the hands of a few A new breed of political action committees has risen: “super PACs.” With their ability to funnel unlimited amounts of money into candidate’s campaigns, this wealthy segment of America is seeking to influence the presidential races and, in the process, take away Americans’ voices.

David Reinke Staff Reporter

For once I agree with hippies. There’s a political machine out to undermine me, man! As a member of the middle class, my ability to take part in future elections has been attacked. The assaulter? Recently unleashed monster-moneymakers called Political Action Committees (PACs). These committees raise money for candidates; their only restriction is that they cannot directly communicate with them. By removing caps on PACs’ contributions, lawmakers further empower the wealthy and silence the rest of us. Knowing that America thrives on anything with a screen, super PACs aim the majority of their loot on political ads. You know, the ones where the 70-year-old suit stares you down, giving you his oh-so-important approval. That crusty old politician can smirk because he was paid by a super PAC. In the 2008 GOP Presidential campaign, ads paid for by interest groups totaled 1,763, while the total number of ads aired by candidates was 66,557. The 2012 campaign has so far yielded 39,429 ads paid for by candidates with

30,442 submitted from interest groups. Within one election cycle, the volume of ad payments from interest groups has escalated by 1,626.7%. It’s no different with democrats. The recent increase in campaign spending is owed largely in part to Citizens United v. FEC, a 2010 Supreme Court ruling which removed financial limits on committees, making it possible for super PACs to raise unlimited sums of money.

Graphic: I. Baillie

Casino chieftain Sheldon Adelson has already exploited the flawed system by donating $5 million to a pro-Gingrich super PAC. The rest of us just aren’t capable

Feature Editor

Leek Editors

Managing Editor

Arts & Entertainment Editors

Business Manager

Emma Beauchamp

News Editor

Joe Murray

Opinion Editor

Katie Stanton

District didn’t want to wash blood off its hands after a suicide prompted by harassment. But school officials’ horrid disregard of the student’s privacy made his personal life the five ‘o clock news. And while the boy’s name wasn’t disclosed, everyone at

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Editor-in-Chief Joe Murray

School

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Down, but not out. Thank God. Denver Broncos’ quarterback Tim Tebow might not have lead his team past the first round of the playoffs, but that isn’t stopping him from Tebowing all the way to the Superbowl. NBC has enlisted Tebow, whose unconventional playing style, well-publicized religious beliefs, and thrilling last-minute victories captivated national audiences, to join Jimmy Fallon for a special post-game edition of Late Night With Jimmy Fallon. Tebow’s most recent gig is a reflection of America’s fascination with an athlete who doesn’t fit the mold – a quarterback who regularly rushes for more yards than he passes, a football player whose only celebratory gesture is taking a knee and thanking God, and a twenty-four year old who’s saving himself for marriage and spends his free time visiting hospitals, prisons and povertystricken countries. Despite his vocal critics, there’s only so much one can hold against someone so unwavering in his morals and strong in his sense of self. And if his football gig doesn’t work out, he can always accept rumored romance requests from recently divorced starlets Katy Perry or Kim Kardashian.

The Black & Gold believe that disclosing the student’s sexual orientation to his parents was an invasion of his privacy. Although we understand the school’s attempt to protect the teen, there are few things more private than revealing one’s sexual orientation to one’s parents. It is not someone else’s story to tell. This was a family matter that should not have been revealed by a third party. It doesn’t matter that he already came out to his school -coming out to one’s parents, and facing the fear that one might get ostracized from one’s family, takes a lot of courage. The school’s concerns about the boy’s safety were well-justified. National statistics about lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, and transgender (LGBT) youth are frightening: eighty-five percent experience verbal harassment at school and suicide is the leading cause of death among LGBT youth. The Alpine

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National – Tebowmania:

Principal outs 14-year-old student to his parents; gay rights groups up in arms for the invasion of privacy

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When U.S. Air Force Tech. Sgt Matthew S. Schwartz was killed in Afghanistan last month by a bomb, it marked the thirteenth time a northern Michigan native perished in the war-torn Middle East. For the thirteen time, a region welcomed a flagdraped casket back home. For the thirteenth time, a community came together to support a family torn apart by war. For the thirteenth time, we lowered our flags to honor the death of one our own. Schwartz, a 1996 Central graduate and father of three, was serving his sixth tour of duty overseas, had earned a Purple Heart and Bronze Star, among seven other awards. The wars in the Middle East have taken on a mythical aura, especially for young people. We have been battling in Iraq and Afghanistan for the majority of our lives, and the longer the battles last, the easier it is to look at them as nothing more than headlinedominating conflicts half a world away. Schwartz’s tragic death is the most recent reminder that the Iraq and Afghanistan wars are all too real - we feel the effects, even in sheltered northern Michigan. As the U.S. wraps up its decade-long involvement overseas, it’s our responsibility to validate the selfless work of our soldiers ands remember the conflicts for what they were to a generation: destructive, deadly, defining. As to Sgt. Schwartz: once a Trojan, always a Trojan.

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Pushed out of the closet

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School: Central vs West. . . in Recycling:

Middle school years are full of hormone-fueled crushes and angsty journals packed with dark, Poe-esque references. Think back to these blossoming early teen years -- hitting puberty, sitting through embarrassing sex-ed classes, experiencing teenage blues. What you likely don’t remember at fourteen is talking to your parents about anything that remotely trespasses into the realm of sex -- sexual attraction, sexual orientation, or the sexual act itself. Eww. However, last month, the principal at Willowcreek Middle School in Utah had an awkward chat with the parents of a fourteen year-old boy about their son’s sexual orientation. The teen had ‘come out’ to his class in a school advertising presentation assignment. Later, his teacher overheard a classmate make snide comments about the gay student. Worried for his safety and the potential risk of bullying, the school summoned his parents for a meeting. School officials were aware the boy had not ‘outed’ himself to his parents and the boy declined to attend the meeting. The principal proceeded to disclose this private information to the student’s parents. Thankfully, the parents are reportedly supporting their son. We at

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Editor-in-Chief

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Joe Murray

Willowcreek Middle School now knows his sexual preference. Who wants this out for the first time on a national stage? His coming out was in The Salt Lake Tribune, and The Huffington Post, and now it’s out in The Black & Gold. Given that this boy is only at the tender age of fourteen, and since the topic is so personal, it’s likely he will suffer some longterm damage. Won’t the notion of ‘trust’ be different for him? How might this abrupt blast over the airwaves change his outlook on life, on sexuality? Schools often forget to look at the potential ramifications of their goodintentions. Had administrators thought about how they would feel had they been forced ‘out,’ they may not have been so quick to divulge this boy’s intimate innerworkings, that he was still likely working out for himself. A better solution Graphic: I. Baillie would have involved mediation with the student who made the offensive remark in the first place. At Utopia High, staff would respect that teenagers don’t want to discuss their sex lives with their parents. The Black & Gold understands the school’s desire to protect students, but their ‘efforts’ were misguided. This student will be writing melancholy poems in his black Moleskine journal for many years to come.

Emma Beauchamp

Jeannie Longton Kaitlyn McLintock

Sports Editor

Rico Bastian Patrick Goodney

Bryton Lutes

Photo Editors

Shannon Weaver

Autumn Hilden Katie Raymond

Associate Sports Editor

Graphics Editor

Ashley Reed

Maddy Kachadurian

Staff

of dropping a check with that many zeros, further illustrating that super PACs buy primary results and influence the electoral process. With the omnipresent candidate-smearing commercials and vote-for-me pop-ups, PACs have leverage. Money equals power--this is revelational? Presidential races require massive amounts of cash: rallies, private jets, hotels, soirees--campaign trappings--these things cost. Big time. According to OpenSecrets.org, Center for Responsive Politics, Barack Obama spent roughly $730 million, while raising around $745 million on his 2008 campaign. Because super PACs raise stratospheric sums, this also impacts congressional elections. Super PACs also purchase teams of lawyers who buy legal freedoms. Further, advertising oversight is virtually non-existent. Super PACs recently targeted the runners in the congressional race, peppering them with accusatory ads bordering on slander. Proponents of super PACs argue that increased advertisement increases voter interest. Perhaps so, but it also creates electorate distrust. Because these ads are so ambiguous, so exaggerated, they can’t be trusted. Already ruthless races become even more snarky and opaque. What we need is less money in the arena; a good dose of honesty and a little more civility would also help. The outcome of our presidential election should reflect the wants of We the People, not the pay checks of the powerful. The Supreme Court made a bad call.

Ivy Baillie Kaytie Boomer Jeff Comerford Kennedy Cullen Connor Hansen Sophie Hutchison Hunter Kelly Alex Korson Garrett Kosch Erin Lipp Fiona Muha Nick Mulvaine David Reinke

Elena Rothney Hayley Rozema Allison Taphouse Gretchen Twietmeyer Lia Williams


Opinion

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

3

Drug testing the poor: bad policy

Not only ineffective, the new programs across the US to drug test welfare beneficiaries is just a different type of class warfare

T Katie Stanton Opinion Editor

Forget the terrible job market, stagnant economy, and just plain bad luck. According to a proposed law in Michigan that has already taken root in other states, unemployment is a sure sign of drug use. In the past year, Republicans have pursued drug testing programs for the unemployed in more than thirty states. Florida passed a law last year that mandated all welfare applicants pass a drug test. A similar bill was approved in Virginia. The consequences of a positive result? The recipient loses benefits for a period, usually a year, and is not re-admitted to the government aid program until they pass a drug test. And now, in our very own backyard, Michigan’s Department of Health services wants to begin a program that would require drug tests for welfare beneficiaries. While the attempt to prevent those good-for-nothing bums from using hard-earned taxpayer money is good in theory, there is one problem: welfare recipients aren’t any more likely to use drugs than an employed American. The U.S. Department of Labor Occupational Safety and Health Administration reports “of the 17.2 million illicit drug users aged 18 or older in 2005, 12.9 million (74.8%) were employed.”

In this economy, many welfare recipients are our friends and family; the mere fact that they have found themselves unemployed in these hard times doesn’t correlate to drug abuse.

Previously, Michigan tried a drug testing program that was ended due to cost concerns. However, before it was discontinued, the program found that the rates of drug use among the unemployed were in line with the general population. Only 10% of recipients tested positive for illegal drug use, and

only 3% tested positive for hard drugs, such as cocaine and amphetamines. Given that unemployed people are no more likely to use drugs than the general population, why not target all two million federal government employees who, after all, also receive taxpayer money? With the exception of certain professions, drug tests without any reasonable suspicion is unconstitutional.

tested positive than expected. While officials of the pilot program in Florida expected 6 percent of those tested to fail the drug test, only 2 percent of applicants actually failed. This skewed the projected cost-savings to the state, resulting in a loss of money after paying for the drug testing of the ninetyeight percent of recipients who passed the test. In the past, federal rulings have opposed mandatory drug tests and the lawmakers who are currently pushing for these controversial bills should take a cue from other models. In 2003, a federal court ordered that mandatory drug-testing welfare programs violate the Fourth Amendment. Michigan politicians are currently debating the proposed law. Our state’s version would only require drug tests when there is ‘reasonable suspicion’ that drug use has occurred, hoping that Graphic: M. Kachadurian this sort of law would pass constitutional scrutiny. While ‘reasonThe Fourth Amendment protects able suspicion’ is an improvement over citizens from unreasonable search and vague language facilitatating blanket seizure. In this economy, many welfare drug tests, it is still not the right aprecipients are our friends and family; proach. A program that requires the the mere fact that they have found rehabilitation, rather than punishment, themselves unemployed in these hard of drug addicts would better help them times doesn’t correlate to drug abuse. transition into productive members of Targeting a class of citizens is classist, society. In addition, participants of a the very definition of un-American. welfare program who fail a drug test Proponents of drug-testing programs can’t be prevented from claiming other claim that catching government aid benefits to exchange for drugs. recipients spending their money on Merely taking away money won’t cure illegal substances would save millions. addiction -- addicts usually have a way In states with similar drug-testing of getting their fix. programs, far fewer recipients have

The religious writing’s on the wall Athiest girl removes prayer; incites death threats

Gretchen Twietmeyer Staff Reporter

At Cranston High School West in Cranston, Rhode Island, sixteenyear-old Jessica Ahlquist dreaded her daily walk past an eight foot tall prayer hanging on the auditorium’s wall. A fixture since 1963, the prayer touted the benefits of strong morals and was regarded by the town’s Roman Catholic community as an important part of the school’s history. Although Ahlquist was a devout Catholic, by age 10 she was an atheist. Making a case against the prayer, she claimed its school presence made her feel that she “didn’t belong.” After litigation, the school covered the prayer with a tarp and it will remain concealed until the school board rules next month. Although Rhode Island is the country’s most Catholic state, First Amendment rights still apply; citizens are free to practice and express the religion of their choice, as long as they are not forcing it on others. While Ahlquist had a point that this prayer was located in a public school, she was not in any way being forced to read it or to pray it. Therefore, the school should not be required to remove the prayer. Ahlquist first noticed the prayer as a freshman but didn’t take action until an anonymous parent filed a complaint with the American Civil Liberties Union, which led to the school board holding hearings. Ahlquist spoke at all of them. She also started a Facebook page dedicated to the prayer’s removal, which now has almost

prohibit the free practice of religion. In this case, the prayer on the auditorium wall does not violate those rights. This prayer is not an attempt to “establish” any religion in the school, as the word ‘establish’ is defined as “to cause to be recognized and accepted without question” or “to introduce as a permanent entity.” Cranston High is trying to do neither. Ahlquist does not have to accept the message without question. The school was only trying to promote positive values among their students and preserve a piece of their history. Even here at Central, we have an organized prayer group that meets weekly in the library loft. Nobody is compelled to attend, and nobody is protesting against it. It is simply there, and students can choose to attend if they wish. While the residents of Cranston have the right to protest the removal of the prayer, some have been taking extreme measures in their attempt to protect the historical artifact. Since the controversy began, Ahlquist has received death threats via Twitter Graphic: patheos.com from fellow high school students, which police are now investigating. Cransuphold, notwithstanding reliton High has also increased secugious beliefs. The only religious rity for precautionary purposes, statements in the prayer are the and at least three different florists beginning and the end: “our have declined to deliver flowers to Heavenly Father” and “amen.” Ahlquist from the Freedom from The prayer was not placed in the Religion Foundation in support school’s auditorium for purposes of her cause. of religious worship or proclamaThe great irony of the comtion; it was merely for inspiration munity sending death threats over and guidance. It would be one the removal of a prayer touting thing if the text of the prayer was love and integrity is glaringly obviovertly religious, but, as it stands, ous. In their attempt to preserve all students could relate to the a religious historical artifact, the words, religious or not. citizens of Rhode Island should The First Amendment states remember their Christian comthat Congress does not have mandments. the power to establish a religion or 4,000 members. The prayer had been written by a seventh grader as a moral guide and presented to the school as a gift from the graduating class of 1963. The contents of the prayer are simple values that the school believes all students should

Hotboxing the Cabinet President drug use: an investigation

It’s no secret that most presidents have skeletons in their closets. However, some presidents and politicians have gone further than others in their experimentation. Rep. Smith of Georgia, a main proponent of drug testing welfare recipients, was recently charged with DUI. As a poignant dig at a drug testing program proposed by Republicans in Indiana, state Rep. Ryan Dvorak amended the proposed bill to include the drug and alchohol testing of lawmakers as well. Below, some famous presidents who were rumored to have indulged in the forbidden fruits, despite their current success.

LSD marijuana opiates

marijuana

Kennedy

Clinton cocaine Dilantin, a prescription drug

Bush

Nixon marijuana cocaine Graphic: K. Stanton and M. Kachadurian Sources: People, the New York Times, LA Times, CBS News

Obama

SOPA and PIPA: down but not out The proposed bills to combat internet piracy were flawed, but the debate over Internet security has just begun. OPEN provides an option that protects citizens and balances freedom Graphic: J. Murray

Sophie Hutchison Staff Reporter

If you’re a typical high school student, you may have encountered the pesky Wikipedia blackout while you scrambled to finish your history essay due the next day. Last month, social media sites and search engines shut down for twenty-four hours in protest of two bills presented by the U.S. House and Senate: the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA) and Protect Intellectual Piracy Act (PIPA). These bills were created to combat the online pirating of copyrighted material. However, popular sites like Facebook and Twitter balked, fearing the bills would endanger their users’ rights to freely post and search. Their protests worked: the bills died in the Senate and the House on Jan. 20. However, the compelling need for the legislation won’t die -- legislators intend to rewrite and re-present the bills. Anyone who has ever had an idea or their property stolen must admit that piracy is theft. In order for Congress to protect intellectual property but balance freedom, the SOPA and PIPA legislation must be narrowly written. The main criticism of the bills was their potential to censor innocent sites for linking infringing material. With limited funding and users, small start-up sites couldn’t afford the batton of lawyers to assure that their websites don’t link to copyrighted material. They would be forced to shut down. An additional concern was that users could no longer post freely; the bills would have killed freedom of speech and innovation. Further, the Department of Justice could obtain court orders to obstruct domain names. The rants from sites like Google, Craigslist, Twitter, and Boing Boing were justified -- it’s unrealistic, and frankly a little disconcerting, to expect that social media giants would be able to police every single

post, every single user, every single day. However, protesters of the bill largely ignored the potential for abuse that the Internet presents; it does need to be reined in. Organizations, businesses and individuals producing original ideas frequently complain that they lose money to plagiarisers and pirates. While SOPA and PIPA had their faults, the producers of original content, such as large media companies, record labels, and book publishers, must be protected. So must patents; violators kill innovation that costs individuals’ livelihoods and our economy who knows how many lost millions. The world is flat. Piracy knows no borders. A new bill being discussed, the Online Protection and Enforcement of Digital Trade Act (OPEN), would investigate foreign sites, which frequently pirate media content from their offshore hideaways. The International Trade Commission would review the sites and decide whether or not the they had committed fraud. If so, they would commission to remove ties to the website. Embracing OPEN would pinpoint the actual perpetrators of piracy and avoid interfering with public websites. OPEN presents Congress with an opportunity to stem the flow of illegal material into the US, without stepping on citizens’ constitutional rights. Although SOPA and PIPA are shelved for now, the protests are a reminder that congress still needs to curtail piracy, while balancing our dearest right: freedom of speech.

See something that got your goat? Drop off a letter to the editor in F-158!


4 2011

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

2011: A Year in Review

OUR TOWN

Tsunami in Japan

IN THE NEWS

Devastation strikes Japan, 500,000 evacuated their homes “I’m sure it was hard to rebuild some of those rural areas because disaster affects Japan a lot more because they are smaller than us. The nuclear power industry is going to face two major difficulties; one, they have to get past all of the bad publicity, and two, they are going to have to follow stricter laws in the future.” --Eric March, Biology Teacher

7 Billion People

Graphic: A. Korson

Nothing you say nowadays is really “private”

Graph ic: C.

Hanse

n

WikiLeaks “I think that the whole WikiLeaks fiasco shed light on a new era of sharing material. There really isn’t that much privacy anymore on the Internet. Its just the age we live in. WikiLeaks isn’t anything new-we constantly share personal information without even knowing about it.” --Clara Trippe ‘14

The world population reaches a cozy number of seven billion people

Carly Lewis We remember the tragedy that struck our town with shock and sadness

“I can’t even explain the pain I felt cause of the loss of my sister, my friend, it was unreal and still is until this day. Now that I look at it, we were walking in the halls with a killer. Graphic: A. Korson It was unexpected to me. It’s devastating knowing that I’ll never be able to hug, hear, laugh with her or see her smile ever again.” --Delaney Miller ‘14

Sleeping Bear Dunes

“There will probably be a natural disaster that will hold off overpopulation because at the rate we’re going, we’ll probably only be able to sustain a certain number of people before natural resources run out. The Earth has a limited carrying capacity, and by hitting seven billion people, we are reaching our limit.” --Pam Tejkl, Science Teacher

Named the most beautiful place in the nation by Good Morning America “My favorite part is when you go to the lake. It’s a tough, three mile climb and the hills are killer going up, and then running down as fast as you can makes it worth it. From the top of the third dune you can see all of it, blue water, a big pile of sand. It’s so rewarding. If someone was coming for a visit, it’d be on the list of places they had to see to get the whole Michigan experience.” --Katie Moses ‘14 Graphic: C. Hansen

FASHION

Toms Shoes New shoes for me, new shoes for them. Feel good purchase

Body Con Shorter is better- Tight skirts show off Americas curves “When people wear them in the winter, I don’t think it’s very practical because it’s so cold out. But otherwise, those skirts are very attractive.” -Ben Holstad ‘12

Graphic: C. Hansen

“Besides the obvious good Tom’s is doing by putting shoes on tons of kids around the world, I think they give a really good example of charity work. They show how helping people can be really cool, not just nerdy. They’ve probably inspired tons of people to pursue helping others.” --Charlotte Noble ‘14 Gra

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Written from heartbreak, Adele’s album tops the charts

Getting away with murdering her baby, really?

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“As a mother, I don’t understand how anyone could hurt their child, but unless you were there, you can’t make judgements. I think the fact that the crime was covered is significant. Since it was covered, there should be consequences.” --Kim Fleming, Science teacher

Graphic: C. Hansen

Black gives the nation a giggle with her “hit” single, “Friday”

BAD STUFF AAA+ to AA

The U.S falls in economic rating, what does this mean for the younger generation? “The impact for students, especially seniors like myself, will be that their interest rates will go up and it will be harder to get student loans... [We] are going to have a larger amount of student loan debt coming out of college.” --Landon Weber ‘12 Graphic: C. Hansen

Penn State Hunger Games The biggest craze among teens since Twlight

“I thought ‘Friday’ was ridiculous, because it sounded like she was fiveyears-old. I heard one word the whole song, I could have done that! If I met her, I would tell her to take some writing lessons because the song sucks!” --Taylor Nottage ‘13

Michael Moore leads fundraiser keeping the State Theater running for another hundred years “The State Theatre is a symbol of pride to us, in its restoration, embrace of our past, and it’s also a new influence in film for Traverse City. It has brought me obscure films that should be recognized more and a friendly place to volunteer.” --Lucas Nielson ‘13

POP CULTURE

“Her album 21 was about her heartbreaks and all the songs were super relatable. Also, I just love her English accent, she sounds so different and fresh. Her style of singing is so unique because of the way she phrases everything. Her lyrics are just really catchy.” --Alivia McCall ‘12

State Theater

“It really hit well with our age group. It kind of pertains to us, the whole story about survival. The characters in the Graphic : C. H ansen book are our age, and it’s fun to think about the possible alternate future society.” --Maggie DeVries ‘12

Scandalous allegations against Joe Paterno. RIP? “In some people’s minds, Penn State’s sex abuse scandal negatively affected Joe Paterno’s legacy. But in my mind, his forty plus years of dedication and service far outweighed that. Unfortunately, when you have that much money tied in with a big time football or basketball program, sometimes coaches lose their moral compass. The focus should be on the victims first and foremost, legacies and other things take a back seat to everything when it comes to that.” --Cody Inglis, Athletic Director Graphic: E. Beauchamp

Graphic: A. Korson

Layout: A. Taphouse


MEDIA & TECH Cloud

Steve Jobs

Throw it in cloud and save it for a rainy day

Amy Winehouse

“When it’s (the Cloud) is working, it’s wonderful. I just really feel like I can keep up on all of my students’ writing assignments. Using the cloud, I can stay on top and get them much faster feedback.” --Carol Roehrich, Language Arts, Drama and Debate teacher

They tried to make her go to rehab, but she said, “no, no, no” “Amy’s death made me really upset because her music was bold, blunt, and moving. Personally, she inspired me to always tell the truth through artistic expression.” --Isabelle Sutherland ‘13

Graphic: A. Korson

Kim Jong Il Down with the dictator

Siri Touchless commands are the next step in technology

MIND BLOWERS

Graphic: A. Korson

“Siri is a new level of technology, meaning that flaws are expected to occur. I really like the accommodations Siri offers and I think that it has had a positive effect on the iPhone.” --Kelly Milliken ‘13

“As a country, we’re happy whenever a dictator whose philosophies don’t coincide with ours is eliminated. His leadership was almost cult-like and certainly that’s not something Americans prize. The Big Brother theme is oddly similar to his nickname ‘Dear Leader.’ In this case, his son took over so I can’t believe that we’re terribly better off, but it does have the opportunity to break from the cycle. Maybe the son, once he’s out of the shadow and mysticism that was associated with his father, will be a more reasonable leader in terms of the relationships between China, the Koreas, the Soviet Union and the United States.” --Amy Pflughoeft, Library Media Paraprofessional

The Einstein of the 21st century

“Steve Jobs perfected the touch screen, which in today’s life is very much used. Without him most tablets and small operating systems would not have been invented. I do think the world of technology will still undergo its changes, but I don’t believe is will be as quickly as in previous years with Jobs.” --Mitchell Mosley ‘15 Graphic: C. Hansen

Osama Bin Laden

The world sighs with relief after this terrorist’s death

“There was a feeling of relief. When you have someone who wields that much power and has such a loose grip on reality, it’s very scary--their ability to influence people to do terrible things. It’s nice to not have that influence any more. There’s one less threat that we have to worry about.” --Aaron Biggar, Social Studies and Psychology teacher Graphic: A. Korson

Arab Spring

Will and Kate’s Wedding

DEATHS

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Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

Riots take it too far, all the way to the Internet

EVENTS

“Social media was a catalyst for the revolutions. It was an organizational tool for groups trying to make change. In my classes, we’ve used hashtags on Twitter to look at the revolutions; you can see photos of riots. There are many examples, from Libya to Egypt.” --Ben Berger, Social Studies teacher

The happiest couple in London said a royal “I do” last April “The Royal Wedding modernized the royal family. Kate Middleton is young and stylish. Her wedding has revolutionized fashion and made clear that it is still possible to be classy.” --Elizabeth Sigworth ‘12

Occupy Everything The “99%” rises against the 1%

Graphic: A. Korson

“I think it’s a baby step. Whether you want to acknowledge it or not, you can’t ignore it. It’s like ‘do something about it people who ‘allegedly’ represent us.’ We need a catalyst, we need movement, we need suggestions and ideas before change can happen.” --Becky Rankens, Spanish and Sociology teacher

Charlie Sheen The man with tiger blood wins rehab

Britian Riots

“He started off crazy but kept doing it just for attention. Warner Brothers definitely made a mistake replacing him with Ashton Kutcher in Two and a Half Men. Charlie would have gotten a lot more attention. Duh, winning!” --Nicole Wolf ‘12

Young people create violent unrest to protest the Government

Graphic: A. Korson

“I just think the most striking part of seeing the riots was the emotion of all the protesters. Usually, there isn’t that much destruction or that much emotion to drive that much hate. They aren’t just sitting in, they’re going out and ransacking businesses, homes and towns rather than Occupy Wall Street where their mere presence was their protest.” --Eric Schugars, Social Studies teacher

Graphic: A. Korson

THE END Finally Harry Potter The legacy is over “I grew up with Harry Potter as he progressed from year-to-year. When Tonks and Lupin died in the final movie, the moment I dreaded finally hit me. It was over. I felt like I had lost childhood friends. The end of the series was truly bittersweet.” --Dan Madion ‘14

Graphic: A. Korson

End of Iraq War Graphic: C. Hansen

The war came to a close with Obama’s announcment to pull troops “I feel relieved that the war is over, but I still believe that our efforts were useless because they will still kill each other regardless.” Graphic: A. Korson --Ciera Dean ‘15

Repeal of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ America welcomes the service of EVERY willing citizen.

“I’m glad that they repealed the policy because it was a bad idea to keep it for so long in the first place. If you are serving in the military, you should be judged by your service to the country, not your sexual orientation.” --Hanna Casperson ‘13 Layout: S. Hutchison


6 Music

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

To dub or not to dub

Favorite songs of 2011

Dubstep has taken root in the global music scene, as well as at Central

and artists have their own lingo to describe it. “A song will build up for a minute or so and then slowly get louder, and it just drops,” Cooke said. “You can’t explain it any other way.” Cooke is a DJ, so he is wellversed in Dubstep. Before a gig, Cooke edits his vast repertoire. “I basically have to listen to all these artists and pick out the songs people would like the best,” Cooke said. To date, Central’s informal dances featured almost exclusively rap and Dubstep. Some students complained about their inability to “dance normally” to these. “The only dance move you can do is pretty much hulahooping,” Abilene Emerson ‘12 said. Emerson prefers other genres of music to Dubstep, but isn’t opposed to listening to it once in a while. Photo: K. Cullen “There’s one song that I like by Skrillex and Korn, but other Ian McGraw, Thomas Hazelwood, Tyler Dohm, and David Pelizarri, all ‘12, gather around McGraw’s SUV and than that, it all sounds the listen to the booming bass of his subwoofers. McGraw’s favorite Dubstep artist is Knife Party. “Their music is same,” Emerson said. more connected than most, and they build in lyrics, which I like,” McGraw said. But underneath the heavy banging beat-beat-beat, gaining America’s attention genres. Dubstep has a certain charm ever since Bassnectar created “The beats per minute (BPM) that keeps people listening, even Basshead. of Dubstep is Staff Reporter though it might not be one’s It has been at around one genre of choice. compared hundred and Cruising down Grandview “I don’t hate the concept of to other forty most of Parkway during lunch on a sunny Dubstep, it’s just really repetitive,” electronic the time,” Chris spring day, students crank the muEmerson said. “Dubstep has Cooke ‘12 said. sic, roll down the windows and let genres, some creativity to it. It’s kind of House or “A standard the wind blow through their hair. cool, but it’s not for all the time.” Drum and Trance or Wompin’ out of their maxed-out Dubstep perpetually evolves, Bass, but House song is subs is some dirty bass. Many morphs, transforms in its memothere are about one twenwould agree that Dubstep is the rable quakes and drops, and its some disty-six BPM.” best choice for a good lunchtime prominence at student parties and tinctions. Although Dubwomp. dances will continue. “House step is techniAs a sophomore, a friend “It has a strong bass, great beat, is more cally faster, its introduced Ian McGraw ‘12 to it pumps you up when you’re at uplifting, progression, Dubstep. a party,” Cooke said. “When it Dubstep’s transitions “I had just gotten subs in my comes onto the speakers, you just got more and sound car and he wanted to know how it wanna freak out.” womps,” McGraw said. make the listener hear it at around would sound,” McGraw said. Whiteout is Feb. 17, in Central’s Technically speaking, the seventy BPM. Dubstep, a relatively new type small gym immediately following mechanics of Dubstep are also In addition to appreciating the of electronic music, has been the basketball game. different from other electronic unique beats of Dubstep, fans

Kennedy Cullen

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Photo: A. Hilden

“I like Rack City by Tyga. It’s catchy, it gets me pumped up. I like blasting it in my friend’s car.” -Reilly Detar ‘15

Photo: A. Hilden

“I really like Good Feeling by Flo Rida because it’s fun to dance to at stoplights with my sister. It’s kind of different than most songs on the radio now. - Maura O’Kane ‘14

When it comes on to the speakers, you just wanna freak out. - Chris Cooke ‘12

Photo: A. Hilden

“I’m not much of a ‘new music’ guy, but I have to say N***** in Paris by Jay Z, ‘cause it has a solid beat and some nice flows.” - Kenneth Merica ‘13

A school full of exceptional talent

Three of Central’s musicians speak about performing in the community Hayley Rozema

Photo: A.

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Sometimes when David Stone ‘14 strolls downtown Traverse City, he is recognized from performances with his band. “Some people stop me and they will say ‘you were drumming last night,’” Stone said. “It’s just a really great feeling to be recognized.” Stone was a member of Seldomtone, a band comprised of Central students that recently broke up. “Jake Myers, Logan Dell’ Acqua and I decided to leave,” Stone said. “We had a different sound than other members and we were holding each other back.” After the breakup, Stone helped form a new band Motus Mixus. Their new sound is *creative and level of musicianship is elevated; they always strive to push sonic and lyrical boundaries. “The greatest achievement is when you can create something difficult and still have it sound good,” Stone said. The biggest reason Stone is dedicated to his music is the satisfaction reflected on the audience members’ faces when his band plays. “That’s the best feeling any musician can get,” Stone said. “It’s great when you see the people’s reaction, and you know you reach them through the song.” After Stone graduates, he wants to pursue a career in the music industry. “That is my first option,” Stone said, “anything in music.”

Morgan Carlisle ‘12 Geoff Rizor Singing in her church worship group, Morgan Carlisle flexes her golden pipes as she performs with her other church band members. “It’s a great way to express myself,” Carlisle said. “If people like the music, it just makes me feel really good.” Singing out of the boundaries of school brings real-world experience, and singing in front of a crowd is one of Carlisle’s favorite things to do. “I thought I should share my music with other people,” Carlisle said. “It opens a lot of doors if more people know you sing.”

When it comes to performing, Carlisle says she can’t pick just one way singing impacts her life, or why she loves singing for her church community. “I’m not sure there is one single reason, but I really love to sing,” Carlisle said. Friends and family encouraged Carlisle to pursue her dream. “Singing opens a lot of doors, and you make a lot of new friends,” Carlisle said. *Even though her passion for singing didn’t emerge until later in life, it is a current life goal for Carlisle.

“I’ve only been singing since seventh grade and have been performing in front of people for a few years,” Carlisle said. Carlisle plans to sing in college and to pursue a degree in Musical Education. “Music has always been a part of me, and always will,” Carlisle said. “I want it to be a part of my career.”

‘12

The crowd’s love for Geoff Rizor ‘12’s music is what keeps him doing the thing he loves to do most: performing. “Playing the audience’s favorites and seeing them smile is just a really cool feeling,” Rizor said. The Front Street Big Band is a group of current and former Central students who play together downtown over the summer. As a member, Rizor gains valuable musicianship experience, and being in the band is fun as well as lucrative. “Playing out in the community opens up all your options,” Rizor said. “I might be doing music as a hobby after high school, but not as my main career.” Rizor and the rest of the Big Band started playing outside of school after Central graduate Tom Cilluffo encouraged them to expand their musical outreach. “Tom told us that Traverse City is a great community and it’s filled with a lot of the older generation, and that a lot of their music is dying out,” Rizor said. “That music is what our community still loves and wants to hear.” Rizor loves playing music from the past because of its ability to bridge generation gaps. “It’s cool because you get to play your songs for the whole community,” Rizor said. “We play music that the people from Traverse City grew up with.” . Cullen

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Photo: A . Hilden

David Stone

Graphic: M. Kachadurian

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Staff Reporter


Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

7

Collections

The mad hatter

Central’s student collectors Inside the collections of our students

Callie Chappell ‘13 shares the story behind her collection

Katie Raymond & Patrick Goodney

Katie Raymond

Photo Editor, Staff Reporter

Mark Jordan ‘12, bottle caps

Photo Editor

Since the beginning of summer, Mark Jordan ‘12 has collected bottle caps. His diverse collection contains around five-hundred caps, including many from different countries. “When my sister went to Europe over the summer, she collected all different kinds of bottle caps,” JorPhoto: K. Raymond dan said. “I have a bunch of sweet bottle caps.” Jordan has high aspirations for his collection. “I had an idea one day that I wanted to make murals and pictures out of the different colors of bottle caps that you have,” Jordan explained. “I’m going to start makPh ing pictures and designs out ot o of them, put them on coffee tables : K. R ay mo and put glass over the top of them.”

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Looking through her plethora of multicolored scarves, Madison Bankey ‘13, has a hard time picking just the right one to wear. “I have somewhere around fifty,” Bankey said. “People know how much I love them, so I often receive them as gifts.” For Bankey, scarves are a year round complement Photo: K. Raymond to any outfit. “I really like how scarves add a nice touch to a simple outfit,” Bankey said. Not only are her scarves an accessory, but they keep her comfortable. “My red and blue scarf is my favorite because it’s knitted and keeps me really warm,” Bankey said. Scarves last a lifetime, and so will Bankey’s collection. Photo: K. Raymond

Noah Mckenzie ‘14, Legos

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As a young child, Noah Mckenzie showed a great interest in creating Lego sculptures. “When I was six years old I started building and my interest peaked from the age of eight to ten,” Mckenzie said. Though Mckenzie isn’t as active with his Lego creations these days, he Photo: K. Raymond still finds time for them. “Just not as much time is available now that I am older.” Mckenzie realizes that he is getting sort of old for his toy Legos but they offer a different creative outlet to express himself. “Some kids play video games for enjoyment, instead, I get my mind thinking and build,” Mckenzie said. “Building Legos gives you real-world experiences.”

Destiny Rector ‘15, bookmarks

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As mementos of her reading experiences from her juvie years, Destiny Rector ‘15 collects old bookmarks from East Middle School. “During eighth grade we were required to read,” Rector said. “Each time we went to the library I would find a new bookmark. I love that there are so many different variations and designs,” Rector Photo: K. Raymond said. Each bookmark features one animal with facts on the back. Although she already has forty-five bookmarks, Rector plans to keep collecting until she reaches at least four-hundred. “Reading books was required, and now the bookmarks are a bonus,” Rector said.

Photo: K. Ra ymond

Madison Bankey ‘13, scarves

In her own words: 1. This was my mother’s hat and it represents that I steal things from her. It is violently pink and corresponds with my style. 2. I have always wanted a tarantula and the hat was as close as I was going to get. 3. I got this hat from my parents. It portrays a western feel and represents the inner cowboy my parents fancy. 4. The first gift I received as a baby was a fez styled hat, which closely resembles the one I have now. I also like to take fez style tips from Mr. LaLonde. 5. I originally got this hat because it mimicked Galinda’s hat in the musical Wicked. It lights up too, which is an added bonus. 6. I like how there’s a variety of random red objects, that together create a unique styled hat. All Photos: K. Raymond

Love and tolerance: the way of the brony Inside Central’s... interesting... My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic subculture

Patrick Goodney Leek Editor

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Teenage males are well-known for their penchants for adventure, violent video games, and vehement quests toward manhood. At Central, however, a growing number of male students are becoming defined by their interest in a television show designed for little girls. With a worldwide fanbase containing tens of thousands of adult males, including a confirmed eight at our school, The Hub network’s television series My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic is catching on with an audience outside its demographic. Its male fans, known as “bronies,” are extolling My Little Pony’s values to fellow students, striking a chord with its positive animated messages of “love and tolerance.” Nathan Barnard ‘12, a self-professed fan of the series since May 2010, is a member of Central’s growing brony population, and one of their most vocal supporters. As with many fans, Barnard’s interest began on the internet. “Pictures starting popping up everywhere on the internet and I was interested in what all the fuss was about,” Barnard said. “I went to YouTube and watched the first episode. It was a two-parter so I watched the second one as well. Then the third, and so on.” However, some bronies are less public about their affinity for the girl-oriented cartoon series. A student who wanted to preserve his anonymity explained the extent of his brony fandom. “I pirated the entire first season on my computer in HD so I can watch it whenever I want to,” he said, adding that he watches “one or two” episodes every day. “It makes me very happy to watch – a very good feeling inside.” Not shockingly, being an teenage male and

Graphic: P. Goodney

a fan of the television series often carries a negative stigma in social situations.

Some people hate the fact that teenagers and men watch a show designed for little girls. Others don’t care. – Nathan Barnard ‘12

“Some people hate the fact that teenagers and men watch a show designed for little girls. Others don’t care. Others are interested in what’s going on,” Barnard explained. “But I don’t care how others feel. Watching the show makes me happy.” Everyday, bronies of all ages join together on websites like Equestria Daily and Ponychan to discuss, watch, and create art about their favorite TV show – proving that the internet plays a major role in the show’s enduring popularity among adult males. As the anonymous student claimed, “It is everything.” My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic fandom among young men is a complex tale, full of irony and often shame, but throughout, love. Barnard, nonetheless, condensed the ideology of the brony into a single sentence: “Love and toleration is the brony way.”


8 A&E Photo courtesy of: Teaser-Trailer.com Graphic: M Kachadurian

Whether it’s a book made into a movie, or a classic film remake, find out whether or not we think the newest film to hit the big screen is a future blockbuster or should have been left alone. This issue, we compare the book Extremely Loud and Incredibly close to the new film adaptation

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

Chamber Dinner: soirée with our stars

Central joined West, St. Francis, Interlochen and NMC’s Children’s Choir to provide entertainment for the annual Chamber of Commerce dinner held at the Grand Traverse Resort. Here, we highlight Central’s acts which include our Band, Chorale, ChoralAires, Orchestra and a number from Grease Kaitlyn McLintock, Jeannie Longton, Jeff Comerford Arts & Entertainment Editors, Staff Reporter

Kaitlyn McLintock & Jeannie Longton

Arts & Entertainment Editors September Eleventh 2001 changed our nation’s view of politics, family and life as we knew it. The tragic events altered countless lives in the confused and grief-stricken masses on a day that no one saw coming. Out of the tragedy however, came the inspiration for Jonathan Safran Foer’s novel Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, and his jewel of a main character, Oskar Schell, who lives in New York City whose father died on that fateful day. Oskar’s father, Thomas Schell, attended a meeting in the World Trade Center on what his son repeatedly calls “the worst day.” He was trapped at the top of the building after the plane struck and couldn’t get out before the building collapsed. Months later, Oskar finds a key hidden inside a vase in his father’s closet. The key is in an envelope that reads “Black,” and Oskar believes that this must be his father’s last adventure for him, as they had shared many. He thinks that Black must be a person so he sets off on a mission to meet everyone with the last name of Black in New York City so he can and find what the key unlocks. Usually, film can’t encapsulate all of the emotion, detail, dialogue or eccentricities that a book holds. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close gracefully avoided the common book-to-movie pitfalls with mind-blowing performances by Sandra Bullock, Max Von Sydow and thirteen year-old Thomas Horn. The casters couldn’t have chosen a better actor to interpret Oskar’s odd personality, brutal honesty and intellectual genius. He succeeded in capturing the spirit of a son striving to make his dad proud even after his death and trying to find closure, while still haunted by disturbing images of the famous “falling man” photo. Simply donning a sweater vest, knee-length shorts and holding a tambourine in hand made his character utterly believable. The acting was phenomenal, but the movie still differed from the book in some respects, as will happen with any adaptation. For example, Oskar’s grandmother didn’t play as large a part in the film as she did in the book. Also, the movie didn’t include some of the vital characters and situations like the tour guide who lives in the Empire State Building, a couple who owns an apartment that doubles as a museum or a kind-hearted yet crazy old man who aids Oskar’s search for the lock. These left-out scenes held an essence of healing for Oskar; they were a vital component of his journey to ease his grief and come to terms with his father’s death. Taking them out and replacing them with other movie-scripted scenes didn’t have the same effect on the audience or on Oskar’s life. This wasn’t the only spot in the movie where the script fell short. Some of the main characters were only a shade of who they were in the book. For example, in the novel, Oskar’s grandmother and grandfather reveal their long history together, which is a conflicted love triangle filled with hurt and regret. They recount this story through confessional letters addressed to Thomas and Oskar, starting with their experiences in the bombing of Dresden, Germany. Contrastingly, the movie showed them in present day without revealing any of their complicated history. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close is a heart-wrenching account of one boy’s quest to preserve a bond with his father after a dreadful tragedy tore them apart. Through Oskar’s quest to find the meaning of the key, the story tells how Oskar gains closure with his father, but also a more understanding relationship with his mother. Considering the high standard the book set, the movie was a phenomenal representation of the story. After all, It wasn’t the destination that shed Oskar’s “heavy boots” but the journey and the people he met along the way that made him and his life a little bit lighter.

Photo: K Raymond

Showing off their xylophone skills at the Chamber Dinner Concert are Nathan Mikulski ‘12, Dominic Farmer ‘15 and Noah Pickett ‘15. Pickett felt that playing at the event, gave him new insight as a musician because of the other schools who also contributed to the evening. “I thought it was a really great experience and I got to talk to some of the other musicians and get feedback from them.”

Photo: A. Hilden

Zach Hayes ‘13 along with the rest of the Chorale sings the African inspired piece Mothers in Brazil on one of the three stages that performances were held throughout the night. “It was bigger than I thought it would be. It was so professional, and the people who were running it were great, making everything run smoothly and keeping kids in check,” Hayes said.

Photo: K Raymond

As the Choral-Aires soothe the audience with their sound, Zach Smith ‘12, Tatiana Crespo ’12, Micaela Jankowski ‘13 Mark Jordan ‘12 and McKenna Cartwright ‘13, and take in the experience as they hear their voices echo throughout the room full of prestigious guests. “Performing for the dinner was way more exciting than just singing for your parents in a church,” Crespo said. “People don’t realize how much they appreciate the music until they sing for a group like that.”

Photo: A. Hilden

Singing soprano is Eva Nienhouse ‘13 as she belts out the song Summer Nights from Grease as Candy Sweeny, a character who was made up for Central’s rendition of the play. “As a musician, now I realize how amazing the music program is at Central and it was cool to see how we measure up compared to others, as well as being able to see the music program as a whole,” Nienhouse said.

Photo: K Raymond

Finishing the final notes of Sleigh Ride are Hellen Groothius ‘13 and Courtney Dye ’13. At the event, the orchestra concluded what some believe was their best performance of the year. Groothius said the dinner was a chance to showcase their potential. “The performance was really exciting because it was my first time performing in front of such important people,” Groothius said. “It really gave me a chance to perfect my craft.”

There’s no business like show business Many of Central’s students participate in our theatre program, many even outside of the school, in places like the Oldtown Playhouse. Here, three members of the drama community discuss their aspirations and insecurities regarding acting as a profession

Bryton Lutes

Business Manager Whether actors are new or experienced, the industry is highly competitive and cutthroat, perhaps even more so for aspiring thespians. Despite the hardships, Grayson Lowe ‘15 decided to step on stage himself after becoming fascinated with acting from watching his brother’s performances last year. “Being able to portray something that you’re

We go through life everyday in our own skin and being able to take on someone completely different, completely new, if fun. -Grayson Lowe ‘15 not is great,” Lowe said. “We go through life everyday in our own skin and being able to take on someone completely different, completely new, is fun.” Landing one of the main roles in Annie as Oliver Warbucks and, in Grease, the minor role of Eugene, Lowe wishes to pursue a science degree with a minor in acting. “I love making people laugh,” Lowe said. “It feels like the spotlight’s only on me and it feels

pretty cool.” Veronica Faller ‘13 also hopes to hold the spotlight professionally either in Ithaca, New York or California. Experience is on her side, as Faller has performed for nine years, in over twenty-five different productions. However, Faller is weary about the profession’s economic instability. “I would love to do it but making money will be a problem there,” Faller said. “If I find a way to make money, I will definitely be acting as a profession.” Faller isn’t the only one intimidated by the “starving artist” cliche. This is just the thing that keeps Hannah Weckler ‘12, from pursuing a career among the A-listers of Photo courtesy of: Grayson Lowe Hollywood and Broadway stars Acting in his hardest role to date of New York. is Grayson Lowe ‘15 as Eugene “Hopefully in in Grease and Chelsea Brown ’12 n a i r the future there du as Sandy. Lowe sported one of the cha will be an opportunity Ka most ridiculous costumes seen in the play. M : for me with a good hic “I knew some people that were going to p a Gr paying job,” Weckler be watching and I didn’t know if they were said. “But it’s so going to take it like, ‘wow he’s being really weird and kinda creepy’ or ‘oh, he’s just bescary, and all of the jobs ing his character,’” Lowe said. are so scarce.” The risk of not making it in Hollywood halts continuing with it throughout high school. I’ll students from pursuing a life on the red carpet. always keep it a part of me but I don’t want to With a resume of only two plays in his fledgling make it a career based on the fact that very few career, Lowe intends to make acting his hobby, people really make it. I think it would break my not profession. mom’s heart if both of her sons went into music “The competition of the industry is always as a major.” a huge factor,” Lowe said.” But I do plan on


Tattoos

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

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ehind the ink

‘12

“It’s my brother’s initials. He passed away as a baby,” Vreeland ‘12 said. “I got the tattoo to symbolize my commitment to him; to live my life for the both of us, since he never got the chance to live his.”

Emma

Micheal

Hanna

Sasu

“My tattoo represents the dogs I have because they are huskies,” Sasu ‘13 said. “I love my dogs very much and I want to remember them when they go so I put a piece of each of them in my tattoo.”

Rademacher

William ‘12

Austin

D’Aquila

‘12

“Originally I wanted a glow-in-the-dark tattoo, but I found out they were pretty toxic,” D’Aquila ‘12 said. “I found out they don’t do them in Traverse, but I still wanted a tattoo. I ended up getting a star with a vine wrapped around it. It doesn’t have a particular meaning, but I just thought it was really cool.”

Jon

‘12

Zack

Clark

‘12

“My newest tattoo is my favorite,” Tyler Clark ‘12 said. “It says ‘God is love’ with a bible verse. It’s just been a reminder to keep my head up during those rough times. I will always have it to look back on and motivate me.”

‘13

Olivia

“My sister asked my mom if she could get a tattoo so I asked for one and she said if we all get the same one,” Hess ‘12 said. “At the time I just wanted it because it was cool but my mom pointed out that there is always something to believe in.”

Tyler

Kellogg

“I wanted something meaningful to me to look at when I look in the mirror,” Kellog ‘13 said. “When I look at it it reminds me of my nieces and nephews and it makes me pray for them to make sure they are safe.”

Hess

Casperson

‘13

“My tattoo speaks to the importance of my individuality,” Casperson ‘13 said. “It’s a quote from a poem I wrote when I was eleven that means a lot to me. It applies to my life everyday. I try to challenge the norm and not conform to what others want.”

Devereaux

‘12

“The cross on my ribs is my favorite. It says, ‘Live, Love and Forgive’. It’s kind of my motto,” Devereaux ‘12 said. “My best friend and I have it. We’ve been best friends for sixteen years and the tattoo means a lot to me and him.”

“I just wanted something for my birthday,” Radamacher ‘12 said. “But I’m going to add a saying to it; ‘You may be out of my sight, but never out of my heart.’ That is dedicated to all my family and people close to me that have passed away.”

Louise

‘13

9

Lauren

Truschke

‘12

“My mom always used to say ‘you are my sunshine’ to me,” Truschke ‘12 said. “So I got a tattoo of a sun on my wrist. It’s also important to me because my best friend Alannah O’Brien [‘12] drew it up for me.”

Greilick

‘13

“My sister has the same one. She got it in Hawaii so it is unique and nobody else has it,” Greilick ‘13 said. “It really represents both of us, it means a lot of different things like strength, the relationship between the moon and the sun, and waves.”

Cunningham ‘13 Sem

“My tattoo is Japenese lettering that means strength and honor,” Cunningham ‘13 said. “I got the honor one because I’m joining the military and the strength one makes me have mental strength and will power.”

Novikov

‘12

“It means ‘brothers’ in Russian,” Novikov ‘12 said. “It’s important because I designed it and Tyler Clark [‘12] has the same one. I never really had a brother and he is like my brother.”

All Photos; K. Boomer Captions; A. Hilden, K. Boomer


10 Internet

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

eacher-student social media communication

avored

As nationwide issues spark regulations for teacher-student online interaction, the role and use of social media sites in education is constantly questioned

F Lia Williams Staff Reporter

“Friend request denied.” Educators nationwide are sharing the consequences of a minority of teachers who misused social media and inappropriately interacted with their students. The price: stricter guidelines that limit or forbid private conversations between students and teachers on platforms like cell phones or social media sites such as Facebook and Twitter. School boards in twelve states, including Michigan, have updated or revised their educator social media policies this fall. Social Studies teacher Ben Berger has developed his own “professional development” policy for Facebook and Twitter: he never socializes with students. Last year, Berger created a class Twitter account to communicate the day’s student activities. “The reason I chose Twitter is because you don’t need to sign up to follow it, you could go to the website and type in my name and see what I posted,” Berger said. However, Social Studies teacher Paige Paul’s Twitter trial last year wasn’t as successful; despite extra credit offers, zero students were following. She now uses Moodle exclusively. Berger said Moodle “just didn’t do it,” and sought a different educational technology platform. This year, Berger began using a different network called ‘Schoology,’ an academic site that has all the features of Facebook and is a cinch to use. “It allows me to communicate with them pretty effortlessly,” Berger said. “It’s been really effective.” Andrew Walsh ‘14 said the Schoology site is very helpful because of its easy navigation.

“He posts most all our assignments and it notifies you every time you have a new assignment,” Walsh said. “If it’s not on paper, it’s on Schoology.” Berger said that since Schoology is similar to Facebook’s interface, it’s second nature to students. “Most of the time, they’re the ones that initiate the contact,” Berger said. “If they have a question with the homework or opening a document, they’ll shoot me a message on Schoology and I can respond really quickly. It’s just like writing me an informal email.” Language Arts teacher and Debate Coach Carol Roehrich said many students contact her for help with assignments via Facebook, a medium she’s been using for close to five years. “Kids are working outside the school hours, and if they have questions, they don’t sometimes Photo: K. Raymond get answers until the next day,” Social Studies teacher Ben Berger Roehrich said. “I feel like I have uses an online site to communimany more hours of teaching cate with students called ‘Schowhen I use Facebook.” ology.’ Berger said he chose Roehrich said she does give and Schoology because he didn’t like accept friend requests, but she is some of the features on Moodle. not Facebook friends with all of “Moodle is like a VHS, this Schoolher students. She said “that’s their ogy is like a Blue-Ray player,” call.” Scott Hardin ‘14 doesn’t see Berger said. “It does everything that Moodle does, but it’s a little any problem being friends with cleaner and easier to use.” teachers. “I thought it was a nice gesture,” disciplinary charges if they post pictures of themselves using alcoHardin said. “Now I get to know hol or drugs. things like her birthday and she Both Berger and Paul agree with will comment on your status,” Muskegon’s policy. Hardin said. “There’s a line between a perBut Roehrich is very careful sonal life and school life, and when about what she posts, and urges you use social networking, that line her students to do the same. can get blurred,” Paul said. “As “I want them to understand that long as you’re using it to help your it’s a world wide web, and exactly students’ school work, it’s okay. what that means,” she said. This idea is precisely what school But there’s always got to be that line of professionalism.” administrators are concerned Roehrich believes that the about, that teachers may reveal too technological age is here to stay, much personal information. In so she may as well use it to her Muskegon, Michigan, the school educational advantage. “I know district adopted a policy which there’s discussion and controstates that its employees can face

The cold, virtual truth: just the facts Staff Reporter

A

report by the National EducationPolicy Center released Jan. 6 raises questions about how well online classes. educate students. Source: Education Week T he report finds students who attend online schools in Michigan are not performing as well on standardized tests as those in traditional public schools. I n the 2010-11 school year about 116,000 students were educated in 93 virtual schools run by private management companies (up 43 percent from the previous year). Source: New York Times T he report says 27% of for-profit companies, 48% of traditional “brick-and-mortar” charter schools and about half of all public schools nationwide operating virtual schools met the adequate yearly progress standards of the federal No

Online

V.S.

Traditional Traditional

Whether for credit recovery, scheduling purposes or pure interest, taking online classes is increasingly becoming a ‘norm’ among high school students What types of public institutions agree online education’s role is crucial to their online strategy

Online students share the pros and cons of online learning

Staff Reporters

It’s not just the same thing every single time. It’s a lot more work but I think it’s easier than regular classes because you can go at your own pace, take time on things you don’t understand and go faster through things that you do.

Number of students enrolled in at least one online class

Graph Data: Sloanconsortium.org

Lia Willams, Allison Taphouse, Sophie Hutchison

Child Left Behind law. Source: Education Week W estern Michigan University education professor- Gary Miron, co-author of the study said it’s unclear why so many virtual schools are not meeting the academic goals. Source: Education Week G overnor Snyder signed a law in December that will eventually eliminate the “cap” on the number of virtual charter schools in the state. Source: Michigan Radio Number of online students surging: T he largest growing subgroup of public charter schools is virtual, or online- schools. Source: Michigan Radio O ver 6.1 million students took at least one online course during fall 2010; an increase of 560,000 students from the previous year. Source: Babson- Going the Distance 2011 ten percent growth rate for online T he enrollments far exceeds the less than one percent growth of the overall higher education student population. percent of all higher educaT hirty-one tion students now take at least one course online.

um,” Berger said. “We’re all on the site together and it’s not so much teacher versus student, it’s teacher with student.” Roehrich said that as long as teachers use social networking sites appropriately, they serve as an effective means of communication. “I just think that when you’re educating kids in the twenty first century, you have to go where they are,” Roehrich said. “If they’re on Facebook and you can connect with them that way, that’s the way to go.”

versy about whether teachers and students should have any kind of a Facebook relationship, but I see it as just a opportunity to extend my teaching and for them to extend their learning,” Roehrich said. “I look at myself as an online course. It’s my style to be accessible outside of the school hours.” Roehrich, Paul and Berger all agree class-like sites benefit students tremendously outside Central’s walls. “It puts us all in the same medi-

Class... on the computer

Online courses may be detrimental to students’ learning

Lia Williams

rger sy of Ben Be

Photo: courte

-Elle Malik ‘15, Online English Language Arts

I don’t miss class interactions because it’s only for one hour, but you have to be self disciplined to get it done.

” -Mikisha Drogowski- ‘12, Online Health and Physical Ed

Online classes force you to practice organization and self motivation skills. You can’t be afraid to ask the teacher questions oherwise, you may have no where else to go for help.

-Courtney Dye ‘13, Ferris State University Blueprint Reading class

You can do work on the weekends, so you’re more free during the week. You can get a bunch of work done in one setting. It teaches you work ethic.

” -Drew Reamer ‘13, On-

-Ian Cummings ‘13, Online AP Computer Science

You get the freedom with it; I can work at my own pace and there is no teacher hounding on my back to turn things in.

-Elizabeth Sigworth ‘12, Online German IV

I like that I can do work anywhere there is a computer, but the guideline pace is very fast, and it’s easy to fall behind.

line Health and Physical Ed You only get to talk to your teacher one hour every week. I haven’t learned as much as I would in a traditional classroom.

” -Ben Saunders ‘14, Online Chinese

All Graphics: M. Kachadurian


Feature

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

11

Front Street Writers Program comes to TCAPS Introducing a writing workshop tailored to high school students’ development Emma Beauchamp Managing Editor

. hic: M Grap udur Kach ian

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The National Writers Series is teaming up with TCAPS to create a new class that will take students’ writing ability to the next level. Beginning next year, the Front Street Writers Program, will enable students interested in a career in writing to meet published and professional writers in a workshop atmosphere. “It will provide a world class creative writing program for young writers,” Doug Stanton, co-founder of National Writers Series, said. “This is not a club; this is an actual class. Students will receive academic credit while learning how to talk about writing, as well as how to give and take critiques.” Stanton is collaborating with Michael Delp, author and retired writing professor from Interlochen, several teachers, administrators, and a few selected students, to refine the details of this class. As a student on the planning committee, Stephanie Petroskey ‘13 is looking forward to this opportunity. “Students will be able to decide if they’re serious about writing,” Petroskey said. “They will be able to see it as a real profession, along with developing better writing skills.” To be a part of this workshop, similar to those at Interlochen, students must submit a writing sample and undergo an interview. In the first week, students will create a progress plan that will set their pace as they produce polished works. Students will meet at a writing center during a flexible time period, but will have a free hour at school to write for their portfolio. “It really is a lot of work,” Kerry Woughter, Head Librarian, said. “Students who are participating must be motivated, committed, and coachable. But, it’s such a great opportunity to improve your writing and meet with someone who writes for a

living.” Not only will students learn from a teacher, but also from guest writers-in-residence. The class will be at a convenient location that is yet to be found. Organizers would like it to be downtown, potentially at Ida M. Tompkins Boardman Administration Center. “At school, you have that mindset of getting things done quickly,” Petroskey said. “But off campus, you’re more relaxed and creative.” A change in environment will set the atmosphere for an open mindset. Students will be given writing exercises during the week. By the end of the class, participants will have a polished portfolio, applied for the NWS scholarship, and sent in submissions for publication in a Michigan literary magazine. Above all, this class will teach students to take writing seriously. “No great work is made in the first draft,” Stanton said. This class will differ from regular language arts classes, which tend to follow a strict curriculum and are focused on literature. The Front Street Writers Program will be very flexible and leave more room to “explore writing” in fiction, nonfiction and poetry. “Central only offers a one trimester class of Creative Writing,” Woughter said. “If you’re not on the AP track, a one tri elective of Creative Writing is not enough.” This rare opportunity will give a private arts school feel to a public school program. “Having someone like Doug Stanton oversee your writing is pretty exciting,” Don Freed, guidance counselor, said. “Students will give him the sketch and he’ll help color it in.”

Graphic: courtesy of Photobucket.com

A fond farewell to Michael George III Beloved tech teacher moves on to bigger and better things

Rico Bastian Leek Editor

As the second trimester comes to an end, so does Central’s time with technology teacher Michael George III. George has taken a position at the Intermediate School District as an Instructional Technology Specialist; he will also continue teaching a Solid Edge drafting and design online class for Ferris University. “With a heavy heart, I must leave,” George said. “It’s time for me to go on to other things for both myself and my family.” Throughout his five years teaching at Central, George has become a pillar of the technology department, as well as the school’s Sci-Ma-Tech program. He joined Central’s staff after working in the information technology industry as a systems integration specialist, bringing with him cutting edge knowledge. George’s students enjoyed his classes because he always pushed them to their potential and made the classroom fun. “One time in robotics I was a little down and he saw that I was sad,” Brianne VanAmberg ‘13 said, “so he came over to me and stuck his face in mine, turned his head sideways and stuck his tongue out. He continued to make random, funny faces until I laughed.” Since George’s arrival, he’s put more “Tech” in the Sci-MaTech program. George also began working with the school’s FIRST robotics team, team 1711, the RAPTORS, where he taught students crucial skills needed to build a new robot each year and made the team stronger as a whole. “Mr. George is always there when you need him,” Jonathan Shank ‘14 said. “Even at one a.m. on Saturday, we can still count on him to be there with us in the build room.” George’s work in both robotics and Sci-Ma-Tech has helped shape this school’s view on science and mathematics for the better. “Mr. George brought a lot to Central,” former director of Sci-Ma-Tech John Failor said. “He’s been a great help with the

Graphic: M. Kachadurian

Maddy Kachadurian Graphics Editor

Ten tips for Tumblr Tumblr is an addictive mystery that requires fast facts for operational efficiency of the third most popular social networking site. Here is your map to Tumblr in ten easy steps: To make your username, take two or more unrelated words and combine them. This will create a sense of mystery. Use minimal effort to achieve elite hipster status. Example: Visualmixtape. Photo: A. Hilden

Michael George III, Sci-Ma-Tech teacher, is explaining part designs to Nathan Mikulski ‘12 and Jonathan Shank ‘14 before milling them. “I’m very proud of our students and what they’ve been able to accomplish with the drafting, design, and manufacturing skills,” George said.

RAPTORS and Sci-Ma-Tech. It won’t be the same when he’s gone.” George is currently juggling his new jobs, along with teaching Sci-Ma-Tech and Computer Aided Drafting and Design at Central. Add twelve hours a week of mentoring the RAPTORS, and there’s a schedule that leaves little time for his family. “This new position should give me more regular hours and give me a more flexible schedule,” George said. “I’m going to miss Central High School and the students very much, but right now, I’m missing my girls back home.”

Finding the hidden wealth of resale shops Behind the doors of thrift stores, countless undiscovered treasures await

Hunter Kelly Staff Reporter

Photo: S. Hardin

Rather than running out to the mall for new threads, Olivia Favour ‘15 rifles through reams of resale store racks to find in-style outfits. Favour likes searching through second hand stores because she likes the treasures she finds. It’s a bit like a scavenger hunt, full of surprises. “Thrift stores have really good deals,” Favour said. “You can go in there not knowing what you’re looking for and just find something.” Her favorite treasure is a beachy bracelet that she found a few years back. Favour has one tip for the avid resale shopper: “Definitely go in with an open mind to what you might find.” Jake Myers ‘14 likes “Reppin’ da ug’” in his second hand sweaters because they’re unique, comfortable and cheap. Myers is proud of his vast collection of sweaters from various stores, but he prefers one in particular. Ugly sweater connoisseur extraordinaire Myers renders his expert shopping advice: “Goodwill is the bomb,” Myers said. “It has the biggest selection in town and it fits my budget, which isn’t that big.” Myers has some very unique finds, sometimes even too out there. He admits to being an impulsive sweater shopper, he even selects some “too ugly to be worn.” “I don’t necessarily choose, I just buy them.” Myers said. Apparently his budget isn’t quite so limited. “Sometimes, I regret buying them if they’re really ugly. I sometimes just hang them up and never wear them again.” Teagan Knowles ‘13 has found many interesting tops, her favorite thrift store challenge. “I have a denim button down, with chiffon sleeves, one half is polka

With the Internet changing exponentially, and becoming an omnipresent part of our lives, we are tempted by its tools and toys, so much as to make us websick

dotted and the other is striped. It is very ‘Yeomans-esque,” Knowles said. “What makes a good thrift store is one that has good clothes, is relatively cheap, doesn’t stink and has a full variety with fun little trinkets.” Sometimes Knowles is even lucky enough to find items for themed sporting events.“I have found a few really interesting things for Super Fans: neon metallic lamé ,” Knowles said. Knowles also likes finding vintage cameras because she claims they take more interesting photos than digitals. “I have found a few really good cameras that I keep in my car. They’re 1950’s 35 millimeters,” Knowles says. “I have a Nikon, Canon and Pentax. Also, I have some cool 1990’s Kodak ones.” Working at Top Drawer Exchange, Kelly Wiseman ‘12 has seen it all. Everything from people trying to donate underwear, to old men spending ages picking out jewelry. Donated clothes provide an affordable and reliable source for clothing. “Thrift stores help the community,” Wiseman said. “The people who come in are in the community, and the people who buy from us are in the community, so it’s a community wide thing.”

When re-blogging, make sure the ratio of photos to GIFs is 5:1 They are fun, but if they are posted too often, the novelty wears thin. Post as many pictures as you will of whatever lies in front of you. The content found on Tumblr is secret and should not be shared beyond Tumblr followers. But within the realm, go forth and share thine opinion freely. We all know how important your opinion is. We really do care. When posting a picture of yourself on Tumblr, use an application such as Instagram to mask your flaws with a filter. This will once again add that effortless hipster flair with just a click of a button. Or just post a photo of Megan Fox. When picking an avatar picture, don’t make the rookie mistake of using your picture. Instead use a picture of a tree, or a pop bottle. Google image the first noun you can think of and grab the first picture that loads. You get extra points for an unidentifiable object. When you get anonymous messages bashing you and everything you believe in, don’t delete them. The extra attention they draw is what you are really going for. Check Tumblr a minimum of four times per day. You wouldn’t want to miss anything. Enable texts to Tumblr to share on the go. Keep the Dr. Who references to a minimum. The point of being a closet nerd is that no one knows. Just because there are fifty Tardis GIFs out there doesn’t mean you have to reblog all of them. Thirty-day challenges are fun and break up the monotony of normal Tumbls. When committing to a thirty-day challenge, make sure to “forget” after a few days. We don’t want too much effort going into this. No one likes a try-hard. Follow as many people as possible. It is important that there is a constant stream of feed. The variety of posts will make you seem cultured. When going for the hipster persona, it is extremely important not to care about followers. It’s all about the vibe, dude. If you take these steps the world of Tumblr will be at your feet, and hipsterdom will fall upon you. The best of luck on your Tumblr explorations. GIF away!

Graphic: courtesy of Digitaltrends.com


12 Sports

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

Trojans bring home the gold Defeating Alpena on Jan 27 meant a 9-0 record in the Big North Conference (BNC), and the Trojans continued their winning streak with a win against Forest Hills last Friday, Feb 3

Graphic: M. Kachadurian

Ever since Title IX, the debated question of “who’s better?” men or women, has dominated competitive sports. “Battle of the Sexes” celebrates the innate differences between male and female athletics

Miranda Winowiecki Sports Columnist

Our cross-town rival Titans dominated the court over both Trojan boys and girls basketball teams just a couple short weeks ago. Despite the outcomes, the games told more about our teams’ hearts. The girls game was defined though mental toughness, with both teams going in undefeated in the Big North Conference (BNC). After a tough battle, the Trojans blinked late in the fourth quarter. Holding a lead most of the game, the Lady Trojans faced a 43-38 loss. They kept the tempo up the entire game and made West keep up. Unfortunately, late in the fourth quarter, West took advantage of missed jump shots, drove in two points and made four free throws. With only a few short weeks left in season, the girls have a record of 8-7. The Lady Trojans’ fellow Ychromosome laced “ballers” faced a tough game as well following a two week gap of competition. After a long back-and-forth battle, the Trojans faced a 41-31 defeat. “It was a defensive battle,” Inglis said. “It was a very ‘in your face’ type of game.” Though the boys marshalled a tough defense, they had fundamental lapses that caused problems in the long run. Turner said they had the shot opportunities, but couldn’t get the basic ones to fall. The best play of the game in Turner’s eyes is one that wouldn’t make the top ten on Sports Center or the cover of ESPN; rather, it exemplified what Trojan basketball is all about at essence -- discipline. The ball got knocked loose and was rolling across the court, when every Trojan in dove for it in the ten second scramble. “In basketball, that’s the greatest sacrifice you can give to your team,” Turner said. The noble act of sacrificing your body for a ball speaks highly of your dedication to the team and outcome of the game. Trust me, or rather the bruises on my hips from diving for softballs. It’s all instinct, all sacrifice, all in. The Trojan way. The Trojans have been putting in work all season and have a record of 4-10. The next boys’ face off against West is Feb. 23 on our home court, and in Titan territory on Feb. 24 for the girls. Nothing is more fun than getting decked out in themed Superfan gear, screaming your lungs out, pushing the administrators on the “appropriate” bubble with cheers, and supporting our boys and girls basketball teams; so come out later this month and get rowdy to help our basketball teams get some Titan revenge. “Anytime there is a Central-West game, no matter what the sport, it is much more heated because of the fans and atmosphere,” Inglis said. “It comes down to who wants it more that night.”

Photo: K. Raymond

Photo: S. Hardin

Left: Co-captain, Lucas Little ‘12, raises the Jeff McCallough trophy above his head. “We’ve worked really hard every morning,” Little said. “It’s good to see our hard work pay off.” The Trojans currently have a 9-0 record in the BNC and their tenth and final BNC game against Gaylord is being held at Howe Arena on Feb 8. “No one’s ever gone 10-0 in the BNC, and we want to be the first,” Little said. Above: Billy Vermetten ‘13 defends against Forest Hills’ frontmen. Vermetten’s mindset when going into an intimidating game is to “always stay calm and don’t let the crowd get in your head.” Vermetten is the primary goalie for the Trojans, and he defends his post each game with every ounce of drive.

Cross-town showdown, hail to the victors Trojans and Titans faced off in the Jeff McCallough cup game and brought the heat of their rivalry to the ice. Trojans were victorious with a 3-2 win after a rally in the third period where their offense prospered

T Ashley Reed

Associate Sports Editor

The electrified Central crowd went wild, beating on drums and showing their school pride in any way they could, decked out in black and gold, glitter and all, with seconds left on the clock. After being down 2-1, Central rallied and put away two goals within three minutes at the end of the third period sealing their second win against the Titans this season. The Trojans went scoreless in the first period despite three power plays. West eventually capitalized on Central’s missed opportunities and took an early lead. West, snuck one past Billy Vermetten `13 giving the Titans a 1-0 lead at the end of the first period. Nico Saco `13 got the Trojans on the score board early in the early in

the second, tying the score at one. As the Zamboni exited the ice, the Superfans went wild, the drums beat louder and our determined Trojans skated their way back onto the ice, preparing themselves for an all or

“We knew we were capable of winning,” - Cooper Macdonell ‘13 nothing battle to the finish. Forward, Cooper Macdonell `13 fired a shot into the top corner with 5:13 remaining on the clock, alongside Cam Givens in a 2-on-1 play. “We knew we were capable of winning, we just had to stay strong and believe that we had it in us,” Mac-

Captains lead their teams to victory Every team has players who possess certain qualities that make them leaders. After being named captain, these athletes go above and beyond to inspire their peers and take on the responsibility of being a leader on and off the rink, court, and trails

Shannon Weaver Sports Editor

“Before each of the matches, I try to get the team pumped and ready to go. I always shake the other captain’s hand and when our teams wins, it feels like I did a good job getting them prepared to go out with the right mind set, ready to win.”

Wrestling Co-captain Cameron Benak`12

Photo courtesy of Benak Family

“I just try to help the coach out as much as possible and motivate the other kids to do their best. When I help lead my team to victory, it’s like finding the most awesome toy in the cereal box.” Cross Country Ski Team Co-captain

Photo: K. Raymond Andrew Bruning `13

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Young teams bring hard workers to the slopes and the court As many key athletes graduated last schoolyear, underclassmen have stepped up to the plate to fill their predecessors’ shoes

Downhill Skiing After an hour-long drive to Schuss Mountain, the CenStaff Reporter tral Ski Team gets off the bus, unloads their skis and prepares for another day of practice. The boys team, coming off back-to-back State Championships, and the girls, state runner-ups last year, are trying to sustain their streaks of success. “It’s a very, very different season this year” Kalvis Hornburg ‘13 said, “I’m the only returning Varsity member from two seasons ago, which means we have a really young team. We’ll have to work twice as hard as other teams to give ourselves the opportunity to win races. It’s a big challenge, but I think we can do it.” The team has gone to four races with the boys placing fifth, third, fourth, and fourth. The girls have started the season off strong with four first place finishes. Paige Pfannenstiel ‘13, a second year Var-

Erin Lipp

This season’s boys basketball team had lost Staff Reporter three of its five starters so Head Coach Jeff Turner called on his young team to rise to the occasion. At each practice, each game, Turner wanted each player’s best. “I kept demanding that we play the Trojan way, play hard, play together, play smart, play with passion, play with pride,” Turner said. Guard Ethan Pilarski ‘13 took coach’s charge to heart and at the Alpena game last month he scored 25 points out a total of 77 game points, and caught 10 rebounds. “I had a big breakthrough,” Pilarski said. “Even though they had a couple big guys who were

Nick Mulvaine

Photo: K. Raymond

“My responsibilities are to make sure everyone gets the right amount of attention by making sure everyone feels like a part of the team. It’s my job to make sure the team stays focused, but has a good time with it.” Downhill Ski Team Co-captain Max

Photo courtesy of Cassidy Klien Collins ‘12

Ph

sity skier, is proud of the work ethic that has brought the team this far. “We’ve done really well, but I don’t want us to to be overconfident, we will be going against really good teams. We’ve worked hard until now, we just need to keep working hard.” New coaches have changed the atmosphere for the ski team. “It’s kinda mixed feelings” Hornburg said. “I miss some of the coaches that left but I’m also extremely happy to have our new coaches. They’ve been around the skiing community for forever and can bring a lot of positive things to help our relatively young team.” Having coached at Central in the past, Head Coach Jerry Stanek understands the tradition of success and is bringing it to the hill. “The girls are experienced and undefeated, so our goals are to win the BNC, regionals, and States,” Stanek said. “For the young inexperienced guys team, a good goal is to just qualify for States.”

Basketball

“The best part is having a leadership role and being the type of person people can rely on. It feels good when we win a game because I know that I can lead my team to victory. My goals for this season are mostly just to get more than four wins.” Basketball Co-captain Ryan Verschuren `12

donell said. With just over 3 minutes left to go, Vermetten made one of his fourteen saves of the night. “The pressure is pretty big, but when you’re in a game with your team, they are there with you and they keep your confidence up. I’m the last line of defense and I either make the stop or it goes in,” Vermetten said. Less than a minute later, Keanen Armour `12 sent a cross-ice pass to Cam Givens `14 who sniped a shot into the titan net, making the score 3-2, Trojans. “My three years went by really fast,” Lucas Little, Co-Captain, said. “I remember my first game and now I’m looking at my last pretty soon, and this was my last CentralWest game, so it was good to end it on a positive note.”

good, I still manged to pull off a doubledouble and help our get another BNC (Big North Conference) win.” Coach’s challenge was also important to Guard TJ Schwanneck ‘13 who said that at “every game, I try to create opportunities for my teammates and do whatever it takes for the W.” This season the team’s record is (4-9) overall, and (2-6) in the BNC. Despite their record and that they are a young, Coach Turner said he is inspired by the team and their improvements this year. “Regardless of the outcomes of the game,” Turner said, “they keep working hard to improve individually, and as a team. They have a never say die attitude.”


Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

Worst Wipeouts Winter is infamous for its icy roads and slippery slopes, and these Central students have experienced some of the worst of winter’s wrath. Here, they reflect upon some of their most memorable crashes.

Garrett Kosch Staff Reporter

Savannah Rancour ‘13 Figure Skating is that balletic, elegant sport of the ice; but despite its inherent beauty, it holds much danger. Savannah Rancour 13’ found out the hard way, on the hard, hard ice when Photo: K. Raymond she almost cut her finger off with her own skate. Rancour was going for a double toe loop, which is a jump involving two full twists, and landing on one foot backwards. With increasingly complicated elements, comes steeper and narrower margins for error. Rancour came down hard. As she was falling, she put her hand down to save her head but one skate sliced right over a finger, nearly severing it. Through the blood gushing out, she could see the bone. The fall was so bad, and her finger in such sad shape, that she got nine stitches. “It was a freak accident but it hasn’t stopped me from skating, though,” Rancour said.

David Chauvette ‘13 Most people think of sledding as a safe and childish activity, but when given a daredevil opportunity, students like David Chauvette 13’ are always up for a challenge. Sledding down the steep Photo: K. Raymond power lines out by English Woods on a five man toboggan seemed like a wild ride. As Chauvette picked up more and more speed, he lost control of the sled and before he could stabilize his line, the sled got offtrack and was barrelling for a tree. Seconds before impact, he and his friends bailed. He jumped out of the sled, flew through the air and crashed on the rough terrain. Chauvette cut his neck open on a stump. At the hospital he got 12 staples in the back of his neck. Undaunted, Chauvette keeps on sledding. . . but with a bit more caution. “I used to not think before I did stuff but that accident changed that,” Chauvette said.

Olivia Luciani ‘14 Even a master downhill skier like Olivia Luciani 14’ occasionally crashes and burns on the slopes, but with falls come injuries. While free skiing in the thick powder of the Upper Peninsula, Photo: K. Raymond Luciani took a bad spill. In the dim, flat light, she was bulleting down a poorly groomed hill with popcornish ice chunks of snow, which impeded her vision and control. When, out of nowhere, a snowboarder crossed into her path. To avoid the collision, Luciani dove out of the way, landing hard on her arm. She broke her wrist in three different places and is presently in a cast for four- six weeks. The accident cost her three weeks off her competitive season, but she won’t let that stop her from doing what she loves. “No matter what happens, I’ll always keep skiing,” Luciani said.

Alt. Sports

13

Alternative winter sports

Winter is prime time for all kinds of snowbound sports enthusiasts, ranging from classics like sledding to motorsports such as snowmobiling. Many of Central’s students live for the excitement of these alternative sports, here, we highlight the most unique ones of the bunch.

Ashley Reed & Garrett Kosch

Associate Sports Editor, Staff Reporter

Sledding

Snowmobiling

As with many other Central students who sled, Abigail Palisin ‘14 enjoys sledding at the hill known as Smear, which is secluded in the woods across from the Water Treatment Plant where students who live close to Central generally sled. “It’s just the place to go,” sledding enthusiast Devon Dotterror ‘14 said. Palisin had an interesting experience going down Smear. As she was speeding down the hill on her favorite sled named “The Nimbus 3000,” snow flying through the air, Palisin didn’t notice her cousin Trey Pezzetti ‘13 standing in front of her. Impact. She hit Pezzetti, knocking out one of his teeth. Despite taking out her cousin, Palisin continues her Photo: K. Raymond favorite winter activity. “Sledding is just a good chance to hang out with Abigail Palisin `14 shreds down the hill on friends, while doing something active in a laid-back her favorite sled at Smear. “I enjoy the speed as wind brushes through my hair atmosphere,” Palisin said. and hearing the crispness of the snow,” Palisin said.

Snowball Fights Dodging the clump of wet snow that was flung her way, Eliza McCall `15 ducks behind the pine tress in her back yard to shield herself. McCall finds snowball fights a fun way to spend her time out of school during the winter. “It’s better than sitting inside because I get fresh air and get more active,” McCall said. “It’s fun to get your body moving.” McCall has snowball fights with her neighborhood friends, Jake Bonifacio, Jack Brewer and Katie Ludwig, all ‘15. Photo: K. Raymond It’s not just a game for the fresh, as juniors Johnny Ackley ‘13, Sophie Lutz ‘13, Rebekka Rein and seniors such as Paige Harrigan‘13, Nick Bonnacini ‘13, and Rebekka Rein ‘12 enjoy ‘12, Nick Bonnacinni ‘13 and Paige Harrigan ‘13 partake in a friendly snowball fight at the Civic playing as well. Center. “I don’t get mad when I get hit, but I want payback. It’s just part of the game,” Rein said.

Photo Courtesy of Lynch Family

Thomas Lynch `12 takes a sharp turn during a race on the Otsego Fairgrounds. “When I’m racing, I think about the next turn or jump. Speed is second nature,” Lynch said.

Ever since he was two months old, Thomas Lynch ‘12 has been cruising through the wintry back trails of Traverse City on a snowmobile. Not only does he snowmobile for fun with his friends but he is also on a snowmobile racing team. “Free snowmobiling is a hobby but snowmobile racing is completely different and it is a sport to me,” Lynch said. On his Ski Doo 440 MXZX, Lynch races at speeds upwards of 70 miles per hour, with quick acceleration and precise turning which is crucial for his success in races. He mostly enjoys the camaraderie he has built with other snowmobile riders. Snowmobiling also gives Central students like Brooke Wessell ‘13 a chance to be adventurous and travel through desolate woods in the winter months. “The people that you are with make snowmobiling such a great experience. I especially enjoy snowmobiling with my friend, Alexis TraylorGolder ‘13,“ Wessell Said.

Snow Cats and Dogs

Pond Hockey

Cross-country and track athletes have extended their season themselves, loosely. The “Snow Dogs” (the boys) and the “Snow Cats” (the girls) meet after school and partake in daily running workouts together to keep in shape for their running seasons. “It’s a good way to keep everyone motivated and a good way to stay in touch with coaches,” Kailey Materella `14, a Snow Cat runner, said. Nicholas Tarsa `14 thinks that the winter running programs are a great way to stay Photo: K. Raymond in shape. Claire Sorace ‘14, Kailey Matterella ‘13, “We have a nice, solid runKatie Moses ‘14, and Molly Peregrine ning base, so come track ‘14 run to stay fit during their offseason. season, some people are just ”The coaches are just happy that we getting around to their origi- are there. They just want us to keep our base,” Matterella said. nal conditioning, and we’ve already passed that point, so we can get to where we want to be speed-wise, faster,” Tarsa said. Both Materella and Tarsa find the after-school running “club” a good way to spend their time during the winter because it requires little commitment and still prepares them for their seasons. “You run how you feel, which makes us want to show up more,” Matterella said.

Taking a break from the competitiveness of the TCC Varsity hockey team, Brady Girard ‘13 enjoys going in his back yard and playing pond hockey. Instead of using a frozen lake, Girard made his own rink out of boards and water on his very own property. Players can even make their own rules, form their own teams and arrange matches whenever they want. However, the exciting game has a price: Photo Courtesy of Russel Family maintenance. Girard spends up to four hours Marcus Russel `14 practices on the rink outside of his house. “For me, a week caring for his pond hockey is just having fun with my rink, which needs shovel- friends and there is just a lot less presing as well as many coats sure,” Russell said. of water to give it its glassy finish. Although this winter’s weather has not been ideal for pond hockey, students like Marcus Russell ‘14, had the chance to get a couple games in. He invited other members from his hockey team, Nico Saco ‘13, Mitchell Ward ‘13 and Lucas Little ‘12 and had a friendly match. “On the pond is where I learned to play the game of hockey and I still play today,” Russell said.

Trick skiing vs. snowboarding The has always been the “heated” debate: new vs. old school, but with a twist— skiing is now new school as twin tipping gains popularity. Central students defend their side on which is a better way to descend the hill in style.

Ashley Reed

Associate Sports Editor “They sew dresses as a side job and have sword fights with their poles,” Nate Pupel `13 said about trick skiers. “They just look so stupid.” Pupel has snowboarded for eight years. The first tricks he ever learned were 50/50s and 180s. “It’s kind of scary learning new tricks because you psych yourself out,” Pupel said. Whether it’s speed or stunts, the conflicts between skiers and snowboarders will be a forever battle for superiority, but they do agree on one thing. Gaining enough courage to perform a trick for the first time

is a hard task to do. Travis Peck `13 agrees that new tricks are frightening, “especially if you’ve fallen really bad before.” Snowboarders have the numbers, but, according to Peck, trick skiers can do more tricks. “You can do different grabs and stuff because you have two things to grab onto,” he said. However, Pupel argues that skiers have the advantage of facing the hill head on, as opposed to snowboarders who are not parallel to the hill. Differences aside, twintippers and boarders hit the slopes and do what they love. After all,“Skiing and boarding are both pretty awesome,” Peck said.

Photo: K. Raymond

Nate Pupel ‘13 shows the manuverability of a snowboard. “My favorite trick to do is a backflip,” Pupel said.

Photo Courtesy of Peck Family

Travis Peck ‘12 flies through the air at the local ski park, Mt. Holiday. “My favorite trick I do is a misty flip,” Peck said.


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Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012

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Graphic: S. Kaufman

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16 The Leek

Traverse City Central High School Black & Gold Feb. 7, 2012 Real stories, real people

Disclaimer: All stories on this page are false, and only a fool would mistake them for fact.

Student Senate race heats up

T Patrick Goodney Leek Editor

The 2012 political race is heating up at Central, with a myriad of young candidates jockeying for an early start on the Student Senate elections. Current freshman, sophomores and juniors have already begun campaigning in key political battlegrounds like the C-building atrium and the Enchanted Forest to try to get out ahead as a leading candidate in an already crowded political field. This is all leading up to February 15’s F-Lot Primary, sponsored by Social Studies teacher Joe Fivelenza’s fourth hour Civics class. “We’re months before the actual election and it’s already getting pretty nasty,” Senate candidate Joe Kanter ‘14 said. “Just look at what [Cam] Gibdaughter has been doing.” Gibdaughter ‘13 has been under fire for publicly ordering Kanter to release his PSAT scores. “I believe every student should know the candidates’ academic range and intellectual capacity,” Gibdaughter bloviated. “That’s why I believe candidates should release their standardized test scores. Well, except for me. Everybody know how smart I has.” Political Action Committees (PACs) supporting candidates like Kanter, Gibdaughter and even long-shot candidate Ben Saovers ‘14 have been flooding local media outlets with attack ads targeted at exposing, correcting, even humiliating their opponents. Nicole Tufronti ‘13, who previ-

“I feel like my platform works for every student,” Saovers said. “See, for example, my cafeteria reform package. My 9-99 snacks plan will maximize school profit, while minimizing student cost. Also, review my librar-tarian values. I will increase Central’s number of books. See, I have something to offer for Graphic: P Goodney everybody.” Leading the Super PACs supporting this upcoming year’s Student Senate nominees have been airing charge against attack ads almost nonstop on local networks. “My Super PAC is simply pointing out my enemy’s flaws so the public can make informed decisions,” Ben Saovers ‘12 said. “I’m just Saovers is senior glad my competition hasn’t heard about my seventeen ex-girlfriends.” political analyst and pundit Max ously picked up a key endorsement media.” (Note: biased lamestream Silver ‘12, who has been organizfrom mathematics instructor John media rag The Black & Gold will ing an anti-Saovers Facebook Passor’s fifth hour Calculus class, be hosting a debate moderated by campaign. “Extolling bad puns was mercilessly humiliated after Editor-in-Chief Joe Murray on and low expectations are terrible Saovers’s Super PAC released a Feb. 7 to be telecast on 7&4 News, qualities for any candidate,” Silver photo of Tufronti donning civil immediately following the evening said. “Or satiric newspaper article, war regalia during a middle-school weather quiz). for that matter.” history project. She since has been Throughout the last few months, In this rapidly-changing political practically a no-show in advisory advisory polls have shown that contest, with continuously shiftpolling stations. candidates are finding it hard to ing polling positions, waffling “Those photos of me as a keep consistent positions. Polls are delegates, and ruthless attack Confederate soldier were taken averaging a little over four voting campaigns, it’s hard to avoid this totally out of context,” Tufronti students in the entire school, and ensuing madness taking hold of announced in a Feb. 3 press rewith three-fourths of the vote our campus. This spring is going lease. “But since they continue to consistently being popular write-in to be one of the most significant hamper my chances, I am forced “Buddy the Elf,” projected frontStudent Senate elections in our to reconsider my campaign. runners have consistently been lifetime. It’s just important that we Despite my affinity for office, I flip-flopping. keep cool heads and remain objecguess its better to be a martyr in Long-shot candidate Saovers is tive while this race unravels. Oh the face of the biased lamestream optimistic, however. yeah, and vote Gibdaughter.

Graphic: P. Goodney

This issue: The Trippy Tunnel Tribe

Graphic: K. Cullen

Rico Bastian Leek Editor

In the ninth grade office after school, my accomplice and I were catching up on the latest episode of Ice Road Truckers: Friendship is Magic when we were interrupted by a sudden banging emanating from somewhere beneath us. Despite the compelling program, our investigative instincts kicked in and we traced the source to the entrance of the tunnels. We bribed the janitors to pop the hatch in the publications room, and descended into the bowels of our campus to investigate. In the dark void, the sound grew louder and the smell of what the Rock is cookin’ filled the air. It was then that we happened upon a village inhabited by a pack of squatters. “It’s really a nice deal we got goin’ on here,” tunnel squatter Mavid Dyers ‘13 said, “Free housin’ doesn’t get much better than this. The rats ain’t too ferocious, ever since we learned to get along with ‘em. We even adopted one as a pet. His name’s Tisdale. He’s real friendly, see?” Dyers offered the rat for us to pet. We declined. The underground architecture was breath-

taking – huts constructed of lunch trays and neon duct tape, walkways paved with lost ID cards, all beautifully lit by overhead projectors. The inhabitants survive off of that which is discarded from the beings of the land above. They live off of overstocked sweet potato fries from the cafeteria and clothe themselves with unclaimed items from the lost and found. Intrigued, we needed to find out more about this whole new civilization from down under. But extracting any information from the natives proved annoying, so we took a look at the native art etched along the cavern’s sides. These looked all too similar to grandma’s National Geographic on the lost caves at Lascaux, drawings that were somewhat indecipherable to modern man. Summoning our anthropological skills, we ascertained that these chalk scribblings had existed at least since the ancient days of the late 1990s. The symbols read: “Founded in 1994, the village of ‘Kneadapla Stukrash’ offers refuge to super-seniors, class skippers, slackers, and dropouts to just hang out when the weather gets bad in the Enchanted Forest. Whatever. Oh, and don’t break anything.” Then we found the source of the noise that

Global Perspectives The Internet hacktivist group Anonymous is in the spotlight again after releasing audio of two FBI calls with the Metropolitan Police and Scotland Yard. What do you think? “I told ‘em this would happen. You never hear about these things happening with telegraphs.”

Maxwell Bielecki Chemist

“i din no n e 1 talkd on the fone n e mor. LOL”

Jamie Randol Student “This is terrible. How am I supposed to feel safe if someone could wiretap the people wiretapping me?”

Elinor Parkin Chiropractor

“I knew the Metropolitan PD was talking about me behind my back.”

Guy Welliver Airplane test pilot

Graphic: K. Cullen

had brought us hence. At the center of the village, a celebration was underway, with drums beating a seductive rhythm, sending good vibes reverberating through the tunnels that made all inhabitants “shake their groove thangs.” “Dude, you gotta hear this beat droppin’,” Sizzy Ligworth ‘12 said. “It’s, like, some allnatural form of dubstep.” After showing off some of our sweet moves, a few raucous villagers offered us refreshments. From there, it was a blacked-out blur. But, we’re pretty sure it ruled. Damn. We awoke the next day in the tunnel streets with brand new lower back tattoos, bling, divorce papers, and the taste of sweet potato fries in our mouths. We’d obviously overstayed our welcome. Gathering remnants of our student lives from around the village, we said our good byes to the locals, and broke it off with the hot girls we had apparently started dating. We would have stayed, but we had a duty to continue investigating the many mysteries of our school, at least until we decide to do something else. That, and an angry mob chased us out for the destruction we’d apparently caused in our partying state. But mostly the duty thing.

News in brief

Graphic: P. Goodney

Last Monday Snowball, the polar bear known for his appearance in numerous CocaCola commercials, passed away, succumbing to a long battle with diabetes. The vets charged with Snowball’s care reported in his final hours that his career choice lead to this

tragedy. “Polar bears just aren’t made to handle drinking Coca-Cola so much,” veterinarian James Williams said. “I don’t know who in their right mind would put him up to this.” Experts are claiming that the influential soda ads have encouraged other polar bears to try Coke. As a result, recent projections have estimated that by 2013, over 50% of the polar bear population will suffer some form of diabetes. Scientists are urging polar bears to try switching to Diet Coke or Pepsi. After proposing the creation of an American colony on the moon during a campaign stop last month, GOP candidate Newt Gingrich has announced additional proposed projects. Among these projects announced were plans for huge pirate ships Graphic: P. Goodney with laser cannons, genetically engineered fire-breathing dragons, and a thingy that turns all yucky vegetables in the world into chocolate. “Ever since I was a child, I had many great visions for this country,” Gingrich said, “and if elected president, I will budgetize all of these totally cool things.” Gingrich’s latest ideas are being hailed as “awesome,” “out there,” and “sweeeeeet.” However, opponents of have been real buzzkills, saying that the plans are “childish,” “irresponsible,” and “not as cool as jetpacks.” “Now is not a time to be focusing on pirate ships and dragons,” Mitt Romney said. “We need to deal with the real issues, and that is why, if elected president, I promise to head up production of a time machine to get America back on track.” This past weekend, millions of people all over the country huddled around their TVs to witness the big game. Some are there for the action, some are there for the redemption, but many are there just for the commercials. The Puppy Bowl, Graphic: P. Goodney Animal Planet’s tremendously cute annual special with football-playing pooches that airs Super Bowl weekend, has millions of fans clamoring for commercial breaks in order to witness the pinnacle of high-budget advertising. Top ads this year included romance from Purina, screwball comedy from Kibbles N Bits, and a short-form melodrama from Iams. “Personally, I liked Pedigree’s 60-second spot. ‘Don’t you take my chow you cat’!” student Veronica Riser ‘13 giggled. “Petsmart’s was pretty sweet too.” After snack company Hostess Brands filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy last month, some of its employees have been looking for side-jobs in order to ensure financial security in these unsavory times. Twinkies figurehead and resident Graphic: P. Goodney outlaw Twinkie the Kid has been the subject of controversy for his business practices outside of his job for the snack food giant. The outlaw was arrested on Feb. 2 on charges of illegally distributing snack foods from a mall parking lot in near Hostess’s Irving, Texas headquarters. “Twinkie has been creating a PR nightmare for us during a very unhealthy time for us financially,” Hostess Brands CEO Drian Briscoll said. “The worst part is that he has confused the public’s perception of the Twinkie brand by also distributing Ho-Hos and Fruit Pies. “Although the mall is a nice place to go for some Ding Dongs and Sno Balls,” Briscoll said. Judges are having a hard time charging Twinkie the Kid, as they originally pursued a life sentence. Briscoll explains: “It’s unfortunate Twinkies never expire.”


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