The Ultimate Dog Mom

You know how when you take a dog for a walk, and he isn't quite running, but is very adamantly encouraging you to go in one particular direction? Nose to the ground, not exactly pulling, but there's no slack on the lead, either? When I was first asked to write an op-ed about what it means to be the Ultimate Dog Mom, that is what happened. My mind took a beeline for what seemed like the clearest route. Obviously, I would write about our rise to becoming Facebook famous all because of our five dogs. Right?

I sat down and pounded out a 2,000-word essay like the over-enthused pup that knows where he wants to go but is really going nowhere fast. I wrote about where I started — just a drug addict that was saved by God's grace and mercy, and how I came to be a Stay-at-Home Dog Mom to two Great Danes, Jack and Lotto, and three Pitties, Sally, Kilo and Kain. But it was junk. Much like the walk I described earlier, that's how the piece felt. It very clearly, matter of factly and without much emotion, walked you through the process of how I became successful enough to quit my job as a Financial Analyst and became what I assumed was the Ultimate Dog Mom, all because I found a way to stay home with them instead of "working for the man." It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't enjoyable either. It got the reader from point A to point B. But to be completely honest, it made me feel the same way I would if one of the dogs pooped on a walk and I forgot to bring a bag to pick it up; nonchalantly walking away hoping no one saw our faux pas.

So I stepped back, and like a scent dog on a trail, while I could smell it, I knew I needed to adjust my course if I ever wanted to find it. Stressing to meet the deadline, and to no avail, I kept asking myself, "What makes you the Ultimate Dog Mom?" I just couldn't seem to put my finger on it. That is, until two of our pups got out of the backyard when a windstorm blew open our six-foot privacy fence gate. As I was running up and down the street in the pitch black, wearing only pajamas and uggs, no coat, seeing only the dark sky and white snow, I thought to myself, "How could I possibly be the Ultimate Dog Mom if I allowed two of our dogs to go strolling the neighborhood?!" But that's just it. The Ultimate Dog Mom is a lot of things, but the one thing she isn't, is perfect.

The Ultimate Dog Mom? She loves, not just fiercely, but without apology. She makes the tough decisions and follows through even when it's hard. Sometimes she stays up late to clean up after a sick puppy then gets up early because well, let's be honest, dogs can?t tell time. Sometimes she can?t handle listening to one more whiny bark, so she goes to bed before the rest of the house. She can?t go to the bathroom alone. She can?t go anywhere in the house alone. There is always an audience, always a boo-boo that needs kissed, a game of Bitey Face that needs calmed down, and the questions, "Can I help you?" and, "Why are you the way that you are?" come out of her mouth more often than she cares to admit. She finally finds that one dog hair that?s been poking her boob all day, and praising God, pulls it out of her bra, only to realize there is a hole in her sock from a game of puppy tug of war. Cursing her dogs, she says, "You are why we can't have nice things." Almost immediately followed by feelings of guilt and shame, hugs and kisses, "I'm sorry and I don't mean that!" The Ultimate Dog Mom? She makes mistakes.

The Ultimate Dog Mom does the jobs no one else wants to do. Not only does she host the Peanut Butter Parties, but she feeds and bathes, trims nails and grooms. She keeps track of medication and appointments. She wipes paws and washes bedding, sweeps and vacuums. She has the patience of a saint and even when that patience gets away from her at times, she is quick to rectify. She knows that dogs may not necessarily understand the words, "I'm sorry," but she says them anyway because they absolutely understand the feeling behind "I'm sorry." She's late for work because she gives out kisses and says "I love you" in abundance. She takes hundreds of photos trying to get the perfect shot. She gets overwhelmed during the day and sneaks to the bathroom to look at pictures and watch videos of her sweet pups that are just waiting for her to get home. She gets home from work, tired as can be, but still has time to hug each and every single wiggly body looking up at her.

The Ultimate Dog Mom often makes it look easy, taking care of dogs, family, a household and a job. With a few minutes to spare before guests arrive, she frantically wipes up the last of the slobber that landed on the walls after her dog drank from the toilet, dribbled down the hall and shook his body from the tip of his nose to the tip of his tail. While everyone else sits, she frets; making sure the couches have been vacuumed, stepping over dogs to ensure the floors are swept, and the air fresheners changed. Often as she's cleaning, she wonders if she's really the Ultimate Dog Mom, or if she just has the Ultimate Dogs, you know, since they get to sit and watch her from the couch as she picks up after them. She shakes her head and sometimes even thoughts of, "Oh, how easy my life would be without all these dogs to take care of!" sneaks into her mind like a pup sneaks into the trash. But, we all know it's a lie. In the same breath, she's talking about a dog she saw on Facebook that needs a home and how that home just might be hers. Frequently, it physically pains her to look at her dogs. The amount of love coursing through her veins when her eyes meet theirs, makes her feel, quite literally, like her heart could burst.

She is open-minded and willing to listen to how others raise their dogs without fear that anyway but her own is wrong. She's capable of researching and finding out what works best for HER family and even when others put her down for doing just that, she goes on. She is a staunch protector of her dogs, her babies. She gives them a voice, and is not only an ambassador for her dog, but also for humankind. She makes the rules and doles out the discipline but never turns away a kiss. She might get frustrated with her pack, feelings of failure wash over her, but she doesn't ever give up. All it takes is one look at her dog, staring soulfully and full of unconditional love, to get back up and be the woman her dog thinks she is. The Ultimate Dog Mom? We can all be her. It's not a title that only one woman can achieve at a time like "Best In Show" at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. The Ultimate Dog Mom is a woman that strives for better.

It's not about how much money you spend, the designer collars they wear, the brand of food they eat, or even how many followers you have. Kind of like being that scent dog, you start out with an idea of where you want to go, but by the end of it, you've made some sharp turns and loops, gone through brush and stepped over (or in) piles of poop. It may not be a straight line, or even the direction you thought you?d go, but no one will ever travel the same exact path again. It's your journey; only you get to decide if you're ready to be the Ultimate Dog Mom.

So, I say all that to say this; being the Ultimate Dog Mom is my purpose in life. Since the beginning, my daily goal has been to make someone laugh, give someone hope and change someone's mind about dogs. They are such emotionally intellectual beings and I feel they don't get enough credit for just how in tune with humans they truly are. Jack, Sally, Kilo, Kain and Lotto are my heart. Some days, just knowing that they need me, that no one can take care of them better than I can, keeps me clean. I feel that it is my calling to give dogs and addicts alike, a voice. No pun intended, but I want to give a voice to the underdogs. If you want to experience more of the Ultimate Dog Mom Life, check us out on Facebook at facebook.com/dogsandotherunsolicited advice and see more about Long Bois and the House Hippos.

Katelyn Hoglund, The Ultimate Dog Mom