Vendor Writing: Norma B.

Inquiring Minds Want To Know

BY NORMA B., CONTRIBUTOR VENDOR

When I was 17, I worked at the Vocational Rehabilitation Center in Gallatin, Tenn. I was asked by the Director Paula to explain to her young son Thomas (he was maybe six or seven) why I walk the way I do. So, during the lunch break as we sat together I did my best to explain about cerebral palsy in a way he could understand.

After lunch his mom (my boss) returned and said, “Well, did she tell you why she walks different than you and I do?”

He smiled and said, “Yes ma’am, she has cepurple palsy!” (Looking back now, I honestly think that was the beginning of my fascination with that color — it is still my favorite!) He went on to tell her it’s a problem in my brain, and how it can affect people different, not just their legs but sometimes their arms, or it can make their hands shake so bad they can’t feed themselves. He told her that some people need help to walk like with braces or a walker, and some people can’t walk at all and use a wheelchair instead. (Back then I didn’t use ANY of those devices. I was VERY independent, but with time and age, conditions like this tend to deteriorate.) I was amazed by how much he had gotten out of our brief conversation!

Years later while working at Goodwill I heard another little boy about the same age ask his mom, “Why does she walk that way?”

Unlike the first experience, she scolded him. A few minutes later I was in the restroom and they came in and she was still getting on to him, saying how much he’d embarrassed her for asking such a stupid question knowing that I heard him. By now the little boy was crying and confused asking what he’d done wrong.

Her embarrassment only increased when I came out of a stall and said, “You know, there’s really no harm in him asking a question, maybe you should just let him ask.” She apologized. I said, “It’s not me you owe an apology to.” I looked at the little boy and smiled and said somebody told me the only stupid questions are the ones you don’t ask, so you just keep right on asking until you get answers, understand? He nodded yes, and with that, we parted ways.

Perhaps you’re wondering why I bring this up now. Well, the other day a little girl asked, “Why do you have that?” (She was referring to my cane.) The lady in the front passenger seat

As told from those of old, there's no problem too hard for our almighty God. Whatever degree of faith or path of a lifestyle one chooses to follow there is never a problem to hard for the almighty creator of all. God has all power of His creations so it's only logical that paths will cross in His time for His purpose. Note that He does not do any wrong. It's we humans with our limited free will that chooses to not do His will, because we see doing our own will as being comfort and pleasure to our eyes, our own understanding acceptance. By our almighty God being the creator of night and day and everything above and up under to started to get on to her as she began to roll the window up. I said hey, it’s ok. I don’t mind, really!

The SUV then made a quick turn into the parking lot. I wasn’t sure what to expect. I suddenly found myself thinking maybe I shouldn’t have said anything, maybe I should’ve just let them pass by. Oh well, too late now.

The driver said, “Say what you wanna say girl.” I was unsure if he was talking to me or the girl in the back seat, so I said, “It looks like you’ve been swimming.” (She still had her floaties on.) “Would you ever go swimming without your floaties?” She shook her head no, and said, “I don’t swim good. Well, I don’t walk good, and my cane helps me walk so I don’t fall. Without it I’d be stuck in my chair ALL the time! That doesn’t sound like much fun, does it?” Again, she shook her head no.

With that the lady in the front seat thanked me for taking the time to talk to her, and away they went.

Why are interactions like this SO important? Because they lead to a better understanding. Understanding leads to acceptance, and acceptance leads to inclusion. How important is it to included? Consider this: When I was in the 6th grade there was one boy who was “normal” — very athletic and good at sports — yet he would ALWAYS choose the players no one else wanted. We called ourselves The Misfits. It was the first time I truly enjoyed P.E.!

He was convinced we could win and more importantly, he made us believe we could win in spite of our glaring deficiencies, and sometimes we did, and it felt GREAT!

The bottom line is EVERYBODY WANTS TO FIT IN, TO BE INCLUDED! But it doesn’t end there. Inclusion often leads to empathy which I once heard defined as, “your pain in my heart.” Empathy, in turn, often leads to innovations that can make the lives of those with disabilities better — and just think, it all begins by simply asking questions!

The lesson here is simple: Parents if your child has questions about someone with a disability, LET THEM ASK! I know it may be awkward at first, but believe me when I say, it beats pointing and whispering. That happens if you don’t! Contrary to popular belief, ignorance is NOT bliss!

Children if you have questions, just ask. If you don’t get the answers you seek, KEEP ON ASKING and it will be given to you!