Vendor Writing: Norma B.

Sometimes ‘Because I Said So’ Just Isn’t Enough

BY NORMA B., CONTRIBUTOR VENDOR

I remember once when I was young, seemingly out of the blue, my mom told me, “You should NEVER play with matches.” When I asked why, she uttered the immortal words ALL parents have said to their children at one time or another — “Because I said so.”

I have to admit, I’d never really thought about doing anything like that before, but this “sparked” my curiosity. So what did I do?

Well, if I’d been smart, I would’ve listened to my mom, but instead as this story will prove, I was young and dumb.

The minute my mom wasn’t looking I picked up a book of matches off the kitchen table and went into the bathroom to find the answer to this burning question. It didn’t take me long to figure it out.

I struck each match careful not to get burned, blew it out, and then threw it into a small plastic tulip shaped trash can filled with toilet paper. I soon discovered that even though I’d blown the matches out, it only took a single hot ember to set all that toilet paper ablaze, and it smelled like….well, let’s just say it wasn’t good.

I immediately came out of the bathroom, closed the door behind me and told my mom, “You were right, I should NEVER play with matches!” Her eyes widened and panic instantly set in and she said, “Oh my God! Why would you say that?” I said, “You might want to open the bathroom door and find out.”

When she did, she let out a blood-curdling scream. My uncle Thomas (my mom’s brother) and my uncle Jimmy (my aunt Betty’s husband) rushed in to save the day! They set the extremely melted trash can in the bathtub, filled what was left of it with water and put the fire out.

Thankfully no one was seriously injured, though there was some minor damage to the linoleum floor and the trash can was a total loss.

With the situation now firmly under control, my mom turned her attention to me — needless to say, I got a well deserved whipping. (It was the kind where you wouldn’t be able to sit down for a week.)

I remember telling her, “I wish I was dead.” She said, “You’re gonna wish it a whole lot more than that before I’m done with you!” (For the record, she was right.)

You’d think that would put an end to my preoccupation with fire, but sadly that was NOT the case.

A short time later my fascination with fire coupled with my desire to experiment surfaced once again.

My mom had a fancy lighter sitting on the bar. It didn’t work but it would still give off a spark. Add a spray of Behold furniture polish and that tiny spark was instantly transformed into a blow torch!

I was eager to share my latest discovery with someone and who better than my cousin Angie? (She was the closest thing I had to a sister.)

As I prepared to show her what I’d learned she leaned in for a closer look, and singed off her bangs and eyebrows in the process. (They’d always been light colored — she had blonde hair — but now they were nonexistent!)

Did I mention we were having school pictures done the next day?

Angie was SO pretty she even modeled for the Cato’s clothing store as a teen, but I have to say, I was prettier than her at least in those school pictures.

Even with all this mischief, I STILL hadn’t learned my lesson.

In the final incident I will relay here, someone had given me a pack of bottle rockets. I REALLY wanted to set them off, but can you believe that no one would trust me with a lighter? I guess I can’t blame them given my history. Still, I was impatient and didn’t want to wait. So I had another brilliant idea. I would light the fuse on the stove in the kitchen, then run to the front door, and let it go. It was a straight shot to the door, and back then I could move a lot faster than I do now. Still, it was a BAD idea.

It turns out those fuses burn faster than I’d anticipated. I suddenly thought of all the things that could possibly go wrong. (Man, I wish I would’ve done that BEFORE putting my “plan” in motion!) So, I let it go INSIDE THE HOUSE and it went directly into my mom’s roommate’s bedroom. Oops!

A loud POP and yet another deafening scream was followed by a barrage of questions: What on earth were you thinking? Why would do such a foolish thing?

I told my mom I just wanted to set off the fireworks and if she’d only given me a lighter it wouldn’t have happened. Needless to say that argument didn’t hold up. She wasn’t the least bit sympathetic, just annoyed.

In hindsight I can’t blame her. If I was in her shoes I probably would’ve felt the same way.

But seriously, there are a couple of lessons to be learned from this. Parents: You shouldn’t put what could be harmful ideas in the minds of curious young children. It’s true what they say, inquiring minds want to know.

Also if you are going to tell children that they should or shouldn’t do something you may want to take the time to explain your reasons clearly in an age appropriate manner to prevent them from trying to figure it out for themselves.

If you fail to do this, as shown here, it can not only be hazardous but also frustrating and irritating to them leading to more problems. (Colossians 3:21)

Children: “Be obedient to your parents in ALL things for this is pleasing to the Lord.” (Colossians 3:20; and Ephesians. 6:1) Keep in mind they are looking out for your best interests.

It can also save you from a lot of heartache in the future if you learn from their experience/mistakes rather than insisting on doing things your own way and suffering the consequences of your inexperience.