THE DUTIES OF A DAD ARE CHANGING, AND INVOLVEMENT IS VITAL EVERY STEP OF THE WAY.
EDITOR & FOUNDER
Lyndsay Jensen - lyndsay@the-intl.com
MANAGING DIRECTOR & PARTNER
Kenneth Macalpine - kenneth@the-intl.com
CONSULTING EDITOR
Conrad Egbert
GRAPHIC DESIGN
The International
AA FATHER'S ROLE in the family significantly impacts a child's psychological and physical well-being. When a child has a healthy relationship with a father figure, they tend to have improved psychological health and better quality relationships throughout their life. I want to break down the father role and how it has changed recently.
Father figures can play many roles within the family structure. Remember that the term father does not apply solely to biological or husband and wife relationships.
Same-sex couples, transgender men who are parents, and single fathers provide just as meaningful parent-child relationships as families with a husband and wife. There is no one type of family where a child receives the healthiest father-child relationship.
Unlike in the past, many fathers today are equally involved in parenting the children and the upkeep of the household. This not only sets a solid example for the children, but it also improves the partner relationship.
A study of married men and women who had just had their first child showed that when a father took the time to contribute to these tasks, there was an overall decrease in aggravation for both partners, even when their baby was fussy.
A father figure can significantly influence the life and wellbeing of a child. In families where the father figure is present, the father serves as one of the first role models and relationships the child will encounter. Children are compassionate and observant beings and internalise relational experiences.
These early interactions with their father serve as a blueprint for what a relationship looks like and impacts both the father-son and father-daughter relationships. This means that unhealthy relationships with a father figure can significantly impact the child's psychological well-being and unconscious relational choices when they become adults.
If a child has a healthy relationship with their father, they tend to have higher self-esteem and confidence and develop more stable relationships with other men in adulthood.
On the other hand, if a child has an unhealthy relationship with their father, they may experience more psycho -
logical distress and struggle with forming healthy relationships as they become adults.
Remember that it is challenging to alter the internalised relational blueprint that forms when children are pretty young. While it is possible to change this foundation, it often takes high levels of insight and significant psychotherapeutic interventions to shift these deep-rooted and often unconscious mental pathways.
The "involved father" idea has taken shape in the past several decades. While historically, men's identities were heavily tied to their careers, and dads have continued to take a more active parenting role in recent years.
When the pandemic hit in 2020, we were all forced to retreat to the safety of home. During this time of solitude, fathers had the unique opportunity to spend more quality time with their kids while working from home.
Researchers at Harvard University have found that almost 70% of fathers in the United States, across race, class, educational level, and political affiliation felt closer to their children during the coronavirus pandemic.
The pandemic also brought more flexible work conditions. While most businesses have returned to the status quo, many fathers have changed their views of their old roles.
This restructuring of how fathers think about their careers and the value they see in achieving a work-life balance is a big step in helping families maintain healthy relationships.
Fathers play a significant role in moulding their children and promoting good mental and physical health. Regardless of how the father figure is connected to the child, the essential aspect of the parent-child relationship is the connection's quality, not whether the child and father are blood relatives. The most crucial father's role is to be present positively – and to remain that rock for years to come. Thank you to all the dads who show up actively and positively regardless of the shape or form you are present in your children's lives.
Love,
LYNDSAY JENSENEDITOR & FOUNDER
THE-INTL.COM
WRITERS TEAM
Ophelia Wu; Vanessa C Petersen; Alexandra Beck; Mariano Davies; Monika Pedersen; Sara R. Newell; Michaela Medvedova; Shani Bishop; Natasha Liviero; Heather Storgaard; Lasse Frimand Jensen; Jane Elgård Petersen; Natália Šepitková; Luke Hannon; Nanna Hauch
COVER PICTURE
Anastasia Sevriukova - www.instagram.com/ sevriukova.photography/
SOCIAL MEDIA TEAM
Head of SoMe
Shivangi Singh - shivangi@the-intl.com
SoMe Ambassadors
Neelam Gahlaut; Michaela Medvedova; Aina Masood; Ane-Sophie Custura; Terumi Mascarenhas; Leslie Noygues; Shelly Pandey; Shivangi Singh; Ritika Jain; Pavlos Tsiakoumis; Sakib Akhter; Rashmi Jadhav; Gemma La Rocca; Isabel Pereira Lima
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The International is published online 12 times a year. This issue was published on 12 June 2023.
Notice: The publishers regret that they cannot accept any liability for error or omissions contained in this publication. The opinions and views presented need not necessarily reflect those of the publishers. Readers are advised to seek special counsel before acting on any information contained herein. All rights reserved. No part of this publication or contents thereof may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form without written permission from the publishers. Published by and © 2021 The International ApS. Registered in Denmark / CVR Number: 39118181
LYNDSAY JENSEN EVENTS COORDINATOR lyndsay@the-intl.com
THE WILDEST METAL PARTY IN THE NORTH! COPENHELL is Denmark's greatest rock and metal festival, which has drawn metal fans from within and outside the country's borders to Copenhagen since the beginning of 2010. The peninsula called 'Refshaleøen' right in the middle of Copenhagen is the epicentre of these four days of hell on earth, and the raw, industrial surroundings are the perfect background for the brutal decibel bombardment from COPENHELL's three stages.
The purpose of COPENHELL has always been – and is still – presenting a festival that delivers a quality event for the audience every year, where they will be able to both discover new music and headbang during immortal classics. We go to great lengths to give the audience a completely unique, total experience from the moment they enter the gates of hell. The parties in the Biergarten beer tent have achieved legendary status, and COPENHELL has loads of entertainment, evil art, demonic hangouts and twisted metal on offer everywhere on the festival site – all of that which you don't get anywhere else.
COPENHELL has become a tradition for many metal fans – also outside Denmark's borders, where the rumours about the thunder from the north have spread like wildfire. COPENHELL is one of northern Europe's leading rock and metal festivals, and therefore, COPENHELL is being organised purely by rock and metal fans – for rock and metal fans!
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ABOUT THE MARKET
Finders Keepers Design Market in Copenhagen is where you can always find new and unique designs. Find inspiration among the fantastic designers and creative entrepreneurs.
VENUE: Øksnehallen, København
TIME: 11:00 - 17:00 Saturday and Sunday
TICKETS AND PRICES:
Day ticket: 50 DKK
Weekend ticket: 70 DKK
The day ticket is valid either Saturday or Sunday. The weekend ticket is valid for both Saturday and Sunday.
PLEASE NOTE:
All tickets are charged A FEE OF 4 DKK. Children under 12 years of age receive free admission. We can't wait to meet you!
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It is that time of the year for the tractor pull, truckers' rally and garden tractor pull in Faxe. Happening on Saturday, 17 June, from 10:00-17:00 and Sunday, 18 June, from 10:00 to approximately 16:00.
So grab your friends and family and come to an entertaining weekend with lots of smoke and great trucks. There will be some entertainment for the children, with bouncy castles, garden tractor pulls, etc. There will be plenty of popcorn, food and drink. The location is, as always, at Skovgårdsvej 2B, 4640 Faxe.
FOR TRACTORS:
Register with Bjørn Hansen on tel: 20464645. This can be paid on mobile pay to Bjørn when registering. The price is DKK 200, including two wristbands for the weekend, including breakfast.
FOR TRUCK EXHIBITORS
Register with Maja Woodham on tel: 31514924 or SMS. Registrations can be made between 16:00-20:00 on weekdays. When registering, you can pay on mobilpay 292494. The price is DKK 250 for a tractor (front trailer) and DKK 300 for an entire haul. Included in the price is breakfast all weekend and includes two wristbands.
TRADERS
Registration to Helle Bjergsted on tel: 60214955. It costs DKK 300 for a stand.
CAMPSITE
Register with Bjørn on tel: 20464645. It costs DKK 100 for a weekend and DKK 150 for electricity.
There will be delicious food and good music from the DJ and buying drinks during the evening will be possible. Party/food tickets will cost DKK 250, and the party starts at 18:00. To purchase tickets and register, contact Cathrine at tel: 28871068. It is on a first-come, first-serve basis. There will also be an opportunity to buy party tickets in the square on Saturday.
ENTRANCE:
A single-day ticket costs DKK 100, and a weekend ticket costs DKK 150. Children under 12 are free.
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Come out and help us celebrate summer in Denmark. The weather is predicted to be nice so we are changing the location to the Kayak Club Maribo for a picnic. Bring your favorite picnic foods, drinks or deserts (enough for four people).
We will have a cooler with ice for cold items but there is limited space. We also suggest if you have camp chairs bring them. We have some chairs and there are benches there but maybe not enough.
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The LGBT+Huset, in collaboration with Aarhus Pride and many other LGBT+ associations, the LGBT+Huset will hold the Aarhus Pride Warm Up the week before Pride and the Pride Afterparty after the parade in the Ridehuset.
The programme for Warm Up Week will, among other things, offer a picnic, movie night, communal dining with lectures, political conversation with local council members, and then a big Drag Party on Friday evening. The programme is continuously updated.
The programme for the Afterparty features DJs JONAS OSTERGAARD, PHTALO and HOUSEFRAU, all of whom will provide a great party with lots of good music and atmosphere.
FOR MORE INFO: HTTPS://FB.ME/E/38GOBUGBG
You're invited to join us for a series of exciting International events where you will meet new people, cultivate friendships, and engage in conversations spanning multiple languages if you have enough courage! Let your words flow, and have a great time!
Our events are free of charge, but we request that you support our fantastic community and host by ordering at least one beverage (it's mandatory). It helps us maintain a good relationship with the venue and ensure a memorable experience for everyone.
Participating is a piece of cake: Register on our website, and check out the date and time details on our Facebook page. Remember, registration is completely free! Don't be fooled by scammers trying to sell you tickets on Facebook.
Don't panic if you see a change on Facebook around 20 minutes after the starting time. It's not a cancellation scheme but a way to streamline our processes and maintain consistency in the event links. We're just trying to make things easier for ourselves and work with the same links (you know, it's a lot of work to reconnect everything every week).
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It is the goal and purpose of Aarhus Pride to make a day of celebration and fight for all, who can stand behind a diverse Aarhus and a diverse world, put love between humans in front and wants a future with equality for all.
We celebrate the progress made in Denmark and our part of the world. The diversity of humankind and the unity within the LGBTQIA+ community and all our allies. We fight for equality for everyone in Denmark and the rest of the world, where the reality of humans, who are not considered "right" in their part of the world, is quite different than here in Aarhus.
Aarhus Pride focuses on the near and dear family and humankind – and you are welcome no matter how you build your family or you yourself are built.
At Aarhus Pride and all events made in collaboration with others, everyone should feel safe enough to speak for themselves. We believe in a healthy debate, where opinions can be opposite and opposite opinions are welcome, listened to, and respected. Transphobia, homophobia, biphobia, or any kind of phobia against LGBTQIA+ humans are not tolerated at any event mentioned. Any call for or actual attack, either verbally, mentally or physically, will result in eviction or a report to local police.
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Alla prima refers to a direct painting approach where paint is applied wet on wet without letting earlier layers dry. In Italian, the term alla prima means "at first attempt". Paintings created in this approach are usually completed within a single session. Many artists seem to struggle with painting alla prima. This usually comes down to a lack of understanding of controlling and manipulating paint. Other times it is because of an inability to paint loose and relaxed.
In this workshop, we will explore 3 different subjects and learn how to paint alla prima. The goal will be to also explore 3 different colour palettes, getting a complete overview in three workshops of how various colours interact and can be mixed.
We will also explore brush techniques and materials. This course includes all your professional materials, including:
Professional Artist Winsor and Newton oil paint, brushes, palettes, easels, painting cloths and ramekins, canvases, reference materials, palette knives, mediums and solvents, and clean up supplies + 5 hours of instruction.
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Rygaards has a strong reputation of a rich educational experience with a nurturing atmosphere where students learn to think for themselves, find their own voice, and engage with the world with confidence and curiosity.
For Anna Kuklina and Sikker Rosendal, the Ukrainian-Danish married duo, it's about sharing the same values, complementing each other, and working together to set the right rules for their children.
And, well, an occasional family photoshoot can't hurt, either.
Born and raised in Denmark, Sikker says you can only recognise some things about your culture after you've been abroad for a bit - otherwise, it's hard to have a perspective on things. "Denmark growing up was a safe environment - I remember a lot of freedom, running around. There were many good opportunities in school and not much pressure - it was almost too difficult to choose." But he appreciated the Danish concept of højskole where, even though he ultimately became a mechanical engineer, he got to try out journalism and media. "I liked it a lot because I thought I wanted to be a journalist at that point. There were no grades, just people who found it interesting and liked media and creating stories. There was no pressure - you didn't need to get a degree in it - you just needed to try it out."
His stints abroad allowed Sikker to get that perspective of Denmark - he was studying in Germany, working in Switzerland, and travelling in the US for three months. There were times when he was tempted to settle abroad, too, or when he had been offered job positions in different countries. "I think what kept me from this is that I had obligations in Denmark. I was in other relationships. I also think Denmark's work culture is special and very relaxed. I was offered a job in Switzerland, in the German part. I can speak German, but to work there, to live there fully, to learn this new work culture, it's challenging."
But he hasn't fully closed the door on the possibility of trying life somewhere else. "I
still feel sometimes that I'd like to do it now. It's more difficult, but don't think it's impossible at all, and Anna is also open to it."
Well, Anna has tried it before.
She grew up and spent most of her adult life in Ukraine. "I had a nice life. I've always tried to do things I would like to do. But, until I hit the 30-year-old crisis and started to think about who I am and where I am, I was lost for a while. Then I saw the movie Yes Man, and it changed my life. Afterwards, my friend who was working as an au pair in Denmark wrote to me, and I said yes - let's try this."
Anna also got an au pair job and moved to Denmark. She never actually chose the country - instead, she feels like Denmark chose her. "I got my visa, and everything was so smooth and fast. Even my host family was asking if I did anything illegal in Ukraine, so they want to kick me out of the country so fast," she laughs. "During the first week already, I felt so much at home, like I could finally relax. So many immigrants say that it's just the first impression and you'll get to see how Danes and society are with time. But I like everything. I like the language and the weather. I like how everything functions here."
Denmark helped her understand why she was so different whilst living in Ukraine. "I love our mentality - we're so open, friendly, and share even the last things we have with others. But we still have a lot of influence from the Soviet era and many limitations in our minds. And I was a little different, and I couldn't understand why I stood out so much. I understand I have more freedom and faith that anything can happen in Denmark."
Now she calls Denmark her second home. After finishing au pair work, she had to leave Denmark because she couldn't find any further work. "And I think I'd been here ten times for those two years that I had a break from Denmark. Some friends didn't
FROM A SINGLE CITY LIFE TO A SUBURBAN FAMILY, ANNA AND SIKKER SHARE
HOW THEY NAVIGATE LIFE'S FAST CHANGES - AND CAPTURE ITS BEAUTIFUL MOMENTS.
even notice I wasn't living here anymore. I was constantly coming back because it still felt like my country."
Not long after she permanently returned to Denmark, Anna and Sikker met. "Like everyone meets nowadays - on the Internet," Anna laughs." Danes are not meeting each other on the street. I used Tinder a lot to meet people. But I was tired of meeting guys who weren't serious. Sikker's profile somehow caught me, and we set up a date, but then I reread his profile and thought: No, probably not, you're probably not that serious. So I texted him that I am looking for a serious relationship, but it was nice chatting to him."
Luckily, Sikker responded and set the record straight. "I was excited to meet you. And when we did meet, I had no doubts. I knew for sure that this was perfect."
Right away, they found a lot of things they have in common. For example, on their second date, they went on a hike. "It was during corona, so we couldn't go on traditional dates because everything was closed," remembers Sikker. This, along with their connection, contributed to the relationship developing fast. "You asked me to be your girlfriend on that hike date. I've never been asked that before," smiles Anna at Sikker.
They went quickly from dating to living together and then married one and a half years later. "We were living one week here, one week there, and then shortly settled in one apartment. From a girl's perspective, you must carry all your cosmetics and things back and forth - it's just so impractical," laughs Anna.
Anna's mindset of sharing all feelings out loud helps their communication. "I believe everything should be said upfront. So I highlighted what I liked, and we tried to find out what to do about the things I don't."
"We are very much aligned in our values and how we inspire each other. So even though we don't agree on everything, we can convince each other to see the other's point of view," says Sikker. "We're similar, especially when we write our goals. We've done many similar things in the past and been to the same places - we could have met each other before. But we also have the right balance of seeing things differently and not being too stubborn."
This comes in handy more than ever because now, they are a family of four - Anna, Sikker, his four-year-old son from a previous relationship, and a baby son they welcomed together eleven months ago.
Sikker's always wanted to be a father and enjoys it a lot. "It changes you a lot. I'm proud of being a dad and helping my kids be in the world - to handle both good and bad things and give them the tools they need to become good people and be happy. So when we are out on a walk, and it's the four of us, I feel really proud."
Anna wanted to have kids as early as sixteen. Then, something changed. "I think I felt the freedom when I came to Denmark. Then it felt weird - that Anna is supposed to be a grown-up and have a kid. But I knew Sikker would be an amazing father, and I am glad I waited those 20 years and had a child with him. It's rewarding having kids but exhausting, and you learn a lot about yourself and being a mom. Just two weeks ago, I came back to work - and my belly is not touching the desk anymore, but I still have nausea."
Their lives changed pretty fast, and they had a lot to adapt to in quite a short time. With the addition of children into their family, Sikker and Anna moved to the suburbs of Copenhagen so the kids could run around safely and be surrounded by nature. For Anna, it's also amazing to see the children develop and learn new things. Sikker also admires the brotherly bond. "It's seeing the little brother learn things from his big brother as the big brother continues to learn, too. As parents, as a team, we had to agree on how we do things in this house."
One of the things they had to figure out slowly was the language of the house. Anna is doing quite well with Danish, having finished Modul 5, but she and Sikker discussed using Ukrainian and Russian with the little ones. "With Sikker, we mostly speak English. I often speak Danish with our older, and sometimes if I don't understand, I say it in English or ask Sikker to translate. But he is catching a lot of words from my language. For example, when visiting my mom, who lives here now because of the war, in the beginning, he would call her Privet - the word for hello," laughs Anna.
Besides enjoying time with their little family, Anna and SIkker enjoy a shared hobbymodelling.
Anna was the driving force behind this. "I started back in Ukraine. In the 90s, being a model was popular, and I remember thinking about it. But I was a normal size, which was still big for those times. That created a lot of stress, and I put this idea behind me." She returned to it during her so-called 30-year crisis, and she'd tried one photo shoot but did not find the photographer as open-minded as she was.
She gave modelling a third shot in Denmark, and this time, it stuck. She started col-
laborating with a photographer she met and understood she belonged in front of the camera rather than behind it. "Since then, I've just loved planning, organising, and doing shoots. Everywhere I moved to, I organised shoots - collaborating with others. It is a hobby that drives me greatly and gives me much energy and creation."
She has also successfully pulled Sikker into this world of hers. She asked him if he wanted to participate in her photoshoot, showed him some examples and poses, and made him more relaxed. "And then it turns out he is photogenic," says Anna. "You make me look good," Sikker smiles at her.
In the beginning, he didn't feel so confident. "I just stood there and didn't know what to do. But there's so much movement, and Anna is teaching me how to move and to kiss without doing a real kiss. So many techniques are involved - it's fascinating to me," Sikker explains. "I like to see Anna doing this, honestly. She's excellent, and she loves it a lot. It looks easy, but it's complex and technical. You can spend hours planning, doing make-up, setting, and getting the lighting right. I also like that you can see the photographers "look" in their pictures - they all have their own style."
Anna dreams of creating a photo community in Denmark where people can easily meet. "In Slavic countries, photography is more developed, and you can find a lot of talented photographers with creative, high-quality ideas. In Denmark, people think about photography in terms of weddings or baptisms. But you can do a lot with photos - see yourself grow in pictures or capture the moments for your family."
And that's what they did, too - had a photographer come into their home and take pictures of their daily life: no special occasions, just their everyday home moments. They're bound to appreciate those moments in a life that's constantly changing quickly. THE-INTL
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"I'M PROUD OF BEING A DAD AND HELPING MY KIDS BE IN THE WORLD - TO HANDLE BOTH GOOD AND BAD THINGS AND GIVE THEM THE TOOLS THEY NEED TO BECOME GOOD PEOPLE AND BE HAPPY."
These seven words are like music to your ears at the end of a recruitment process that has lasted weeks, or for some, even months. You’ve loved every second of the recruitment process and you’re already imagining updating your Linkedin profile. Now it’s just a small matter of your salary.
I’ll show you have to negotiate the salary you deserve.
When entering into any negotiation, it’s vital to know your value. What is the average salary for this job in your industry, location and level of experience? Without knowing this information it’s very difficult to enter into a successful negotiation. A key advantage of being a member of a union (or fagforening) is that they provide their members with information on salaries, so it’s a great way to learn how your offer measures up. It’s essential to be honest with yourself when assessing the skills and experience and what you can bring to the company. This step will also make it far easier for you to justify your salary requirements in the negotiations. Now you have your number it’s important to communicate this early in the recruitment process to avoid any nasty surprises later on.
The key to earning your value is knowing your value.
In any negotiation there’s always a give and take. The majority of companies will have salary ranges for jobs based on experience, skills and budget. Some companies may be able to make exceptions but not others. If this is the case there are many things you can negotiate on beyond base salary.
These can include:
• Additional vacation days or feriefridage
• Additional pension contributions Company shares
When considering an offer, it’s advantageous to consider ALL parts of the offer.
If you want to get the salary you deserve, be prepared to negotiate.
Providing a salary range can be one of the best ways to get the salary you desire
You’re probably wondering now why you shouldn’t just tell them the amount you want, right? Providing a salary range has many benefits in salary negotiations. First and foremost, it shows that you’re open to negotiate in the first place. Imagine receiving a
“take it or leave it” offer from the company, it wouldn’t feel right would it? But surely, if you give the company a range, they’ll just offer me the bottom of that bracket? It’s important to have your desired salary at, or near, the lower end of the range to prevent yourself from being lowballed. This will also have the benefit of making your desired salary seem far more reasonable in comparison to the top end of the range, a technique called the anchoring effect. The final benefit from offering a range is to start a discussion and gives you the opportunity to justify your salary demands.
If you want to get the salary you deserve then give them a range.
You win some, you lose some.
At a certain point it may become clear that the company offering you the position is either unwilling or incapable of offering you the salary you need. At this point you need to be comfortable walking away. And guess what? That’s okay!
Not every job offer gets accepted. It’s crucial that if you accept the offer you feel comfortable in doing so. It’s important that you have boundaries for how much you can negotiate on salary-wise.
It’s far better to politely decline the offer than to accept and then leave within a few months for something else. Despite many people thinking the contrary, recruiters and hiring managers are professionals, you won’t hurt their feelings by telling them the truth and that the offer was not acceptable to you.
In any negotiation you might not get what you need - so don’t be afraid to walk away. There you have it! Use these tips to negotiate your next job offer and get the job (and salary!) your talent deserves! Stay tuned for next month! THE-INTL
“Not every job offer gets accepted. It’s crucial that if you accept the offer you feel comfortable in doing so.”
Luke is a Senior Talent Acquisition Partner at SYBO Games, the company behind the smash-hit game Subway Surfers. Based in Copenhagen (by way of London)!, he has been working to make SYBO grow. He spends his time finding the best talent that the games community has to offer!
He is always keen to build relationships by bringing passion and enthusiasm to the recruitment process. An advocate of Employer Branding, Luke works with the talented people at SYBO to let the world know how great a place it is to work.
When he's not hiring awesome talents for SYBO or cycling (he does live in Copenhagen, after all!), he's busy reading his favourite books and channelling his inner Hemingway as a writer!
@Luke Hannon @ Hannon Recruits @ hannonrecruits
Summer holidays are around the corner! This means many more outdoor activities to go to and meet the locals.
IIT’S A GREAT way to meet your colleagues in an informal, fun way than you would have imagined possible. Meeting the Danes in more private, social surroundings will be a great experience as you will understand each other better when knowing more about each other professionally and personally.
As in many other countries, barbecue parties are an excellent opportunity to meet colleagues and their partners. The Danes do not necessarily need a specific occasion to meet to barbeque. The one reason is that you can never trust the Danish weather - so accept the invitations whenever possible, as this will often come spontaneously as garden parties will always be best enjoyed on a lovely sunny day or evening.
During the summer, there might also be other options to meet the locals and internationals in a social setting. Try to attend one or more of the festivals around Denmark. Here is a list of some of the most well-known festivals.
Many of the festivals are known for being dependent on volunteers. At Roskilde Festival, there are close to 100,000 people, and approximately 30% are volunteers. As an expat, it might be a fun idea to volunteer in Denmark, meet the Danes in a social setting, enjoy fantastic music, and make new friends. It is also a great chance to practise your Danish, even though some people might be a bit drunk at the festival – which would probably make it more funny.
During the last few years, non-alcoholic beer has become increasingly popular at some festivals and in general. Today the range of non-alcoholic beers and wines is on the increase.
Ticket prices have also risen over the last few years. Back in 1971, the day ticket price for Roskilde Festival was DKK 30 - today, the price is DKK 2,250.
With the high bottle recycling (pant) level in Denmark, it is a profitable business to gather all these bottles left over from the festivals. Yearly the amount of recycling amounts to around DKK 11,000,000.
Some of the well-known festivals host many international artists. International artists flock to more prominent festivals like Roskilde Festival, Aarhus Festival week, the carnival in Aalborg, and Smuk Festival.
Roskilde has hosted an annual rock festival, presenting wellknown names and attracting audiences of up to 70,000 since 1971. Profits of EUR 12 million have been handed over to humanitarian causes worldwide.
Aalborg hosts a street carnival every spring. With 30,000 active participants, it’s the largest in northern Europe.
The Aarhus Festival Week, held annually in late summer, has become one of northern Europe’s largest and most reputable arts and cultural festivals. Founded in 1964, the first festival was held a year later. The Danish Queen, HRM Margrethe, is its protector and the city’s chief mayor, the executive chairperson. Traditionally, each year the festival adopts a theme like Womania and In Motion, focusing on women and movements in art, respectively. The festival week has become an arts magnet for Danes and foreign visitors.
Slightly smaller festivals, but just as much fun:
22-24 JUNE: Tinderbox - Tusindårsskoven, Odense
22-24 JUNE: Kløften Festival - Haderslev
29 JUNE-2 JULY: Skagen Jazz Festival
19-22 JULY: Samsø Festival
30 JULY-6 AUGUST: Smukfest - Skanderborg (south of Aarhus)
24-27 AUGUST: Tønder Festival (folk music)
1-2 SEPTEMBER: Midtfyns Festival - Ringe
As you can see, the festival period is quite long, from May until the beginning of September.
If you are interested in music, and learning more about what the Danes are doing during the summer, do yourselves a favour and visit one of the festivals. I hope I have given you some inspiration for summer activities to meet the locals and visit other parts of our beautiful country. THE-INTL
Jane is a local and grew up in Denmark, apart from a few long-term stays abroad, whilst travelling extensively. For the last 10 years, her business has supported relocating internationals to Denmark and helping businesses onboard their employees. She loves a challenge and feels there are many different expectations of moving to Denmark, depending on who you are and where you come from.
kulturdetektiven.dk
WHEN TALKING TO ANYONE CONSIDERING OR ABOUT TO STEP INTO A LIFESTYLE CHANGE, THE MOST COMMON QUESTIONS ARE: “HOW DO I GET STARTED?” AND “HOW CAN I STAY CONSISTENT WITH A ROUTINE?”
ALEXANDRA BECK SHARES THE BEST WAY FORWARD.
MMOST PEOPLE HAVE been thinking about getting fitter, healthier, and stronger for months and even years but have never plucked up the courage to leap for fear of feeling out of place, not good enough or haven’t found any activity appealing enough even to try.
Some have waited for their general practitioners to prescribe exercise and a more nutrient-rich diet and are confused about where to start. But, this was not part of the plan, now was it?
Very few have just jumped into one of my classes, knowing for sure that this will be the start of a long-term relationship with their fitness and health.
So, if you find yourself in one of the two first situations, you are certainly not alone and trust me when I say that it’s not meant to be easy. If it were, everyone would be doing it, and we would not be in a position where our health and fitness are on the lifeline.
You have heard it before, and I will repeat it: START. START NOW. It’s NOT too late, it IS the right time, and you ARE good enough.
I was not always the health and fitness person that I am today - I have had my struggles, and here is what has worked for me:
#1 SEEKING PROFESSIONAL SUPPORT.
Find a coach who is down to earth, understands your strengths and challenges and can provide a structured framework for your health and fitness journey. Not knowing where or how to start and then trying to Google yourself into fitness will land you on some TikTok channel and back to square one. Perhaps you have even already tried that… did it help?
#2 MAKING WEEKLY APPOINTMENTS WITH MYSELF.
Take your own fitness class 1:1’s as se -
riously as you would with your boss because, ultimately, your body will see you through until the very end, and without it, you won’t be able to work anyway, right? So keep these non-postponable, non-replaceable appointments and you will not only feel proud but also see and experience results and new healthy habits you didn’t even know you wanted. So stick them into the calendar, block them out, and if you respect your time, others will too.
you are, which is a scary thought when you want to change.
Alex is a Swiss/Brit mom and wife who has lived in Copenhagen since 2009. She switched from corporate life in communications to the independent life of an outdoor personal and group fitness trainer. She coaches people of all ages and fitness levels to find fun and consistency in movement through individual and group workouts. Delivering entertainment and spreading group fitness magic is her superpower. Alex encourages you to high-five her if you see her in the capital!
#3
Find and use your real reason as a guiding star towards a successful journey. Believe that you can, and keep up the hard work. I say HARD because it is! Creating patterns takes time and effort. Without those two components, you can expect to stay where
#4 MAKING MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY AWARE OF MY PLAN. Use your network to support your plan. If you tell them about what you are doing and some of the why, it will be easier for you to make sure you stick to point 2. Not that you need to justify why your health is more important than meeting up for drinks at 16:00 instead of 17:00, but it does make you respect your goals and self-care in a way that will make you feel more confident and committed.
Starting is the key. Staying committed will be a journey. Give yourself time, make the necessary efforts and then reap the amazing benefits of your improved health in the long run! THE-INTL
@alexbeck.fit
@alexbeck.fit
@alexbeck.fit
EACH YEAR, THOUSANDS OF INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD COME TO NORTH DENMARK TO PURSUE HIGHER EDUCATION AND START THEIR CAREERS. THESE STUDENTS BRING DIVERSE BACKGROUNDS, SKILLS, AND PERSPECTIVES, WHICH CAN CONTRIBUTE SIGNIFICANTLY TO THE DANISH ECONOMY AND SOCIETY.
OONE OF THE key advantages of having international students in the Danish workforce is their ability to improve our society's green transformation and digitalisation. Denmark is facing a shortage of workers in specific sectors, such as IT, healthcare, engineering, and more. International students who have studied in these fields at our local educational institutions, in addition to education from abroad, gain valuable knowledge and work experience during their studies that can help to fill these gaps and meet the demands of the labour market. In the North Denmark region alone, the number of employed international residents has risen 98% since 2009. In 2020 there were 31,574 internationals in jobs, and we expect this number to continue to grow.
International students bring a global perspective and understanding of different cultures, which can help Danish companies expand their businesses internationally. Businesses in the North Denmark region have reported the presence of international employees is undoubtedly a significant advantage, mainly due to their market knowledge, cultural knowledge, and language skills.
We can also see how international students can help to boost innovation and creativity in the Danish workforce. These students often come from different backgrounds and have different ways of thinking, which can lead to new ideas and approaches to problem-solving. This can help our local companies stay competitive and drive innovation and growth.
At International House North Denmark (IHND), we help young international talent get their bearings and settle in the North Denmark region. Our mission is to retain as much talent as possible in the region. We are ready to assist international students with finding their next internship, company collaboration, and job.
Young Professionals in Denmark (YPD) is an exceptional initiative for students who aspire to establish a career in Denmark after graduation. The one-year programme aims to introduce ambitious and talented students to the Danish labour market and equip them with the necessary skills and knowledge to succeed in their chosen field.
YPD offers an unparalleled opportunity for students to meet various Danish employers and gain insight into their respective industries. This exposure allows them to make informed decisions about their future career paths and prepare for post-graduation work in Denmark. The programme also helps to bridge the gap between academia and industry, providing students with the necessary practical experience to complement their academic knowledge. Most participants take on student jobs and intern-
ships during their studies.
By providing a platform for students to engage with potential employers and learn about the Danish work culture, YPD is helping to create a pipeline of skilled professionals who contribute to the Danish economy.
Since working with international talents in different programmes began, 93% of the participants have secured full-time jobs after graduation. In addition, the diversity within the programme, with 78 participants from 32 different nationalities and a range of academic disciplines from engineering, social sciences and business, shows the program's ability to cater to a broad spectrum of students and employers in the region.
STUDENT
One participant, Yang Che from Taiwan, came to AAU in 2016, where he studied Design of Mechanical Systems. He graduated from a career programme, learned Danish, and was very active in the various activities the university and we promoted. He met a local Aalborg company called Liftra A/S at our Asian Business Fair and got offered an internship. After his internship, he was invited to write his master's thesis with the company and offered a full-time job after graduation.
At IHND, international students are a valuable asset to the Danish workforce and society. They bring diverse skills, perspectives, and cultural understanding that can help businesses expand globally, fill gaps in the labour market, and drive innovation and creativity. International House North Denmark and initiatives such as Young Professionals in Denmark are committed to helping international students integrate and establish their careers in North Denmark, contributing to the growth of the region's economy and society. THE-INTL
TEAM MANAGER AND CITY COUNCIL MEMBER
Team Manager at International House North Denmark.
City Council member in Aalborg Municipality.
Group chairman for the Social Democratic Party in Aalborg.
Chairman of DANVA and Port of Aalborg.
Father of three kids and married to Kirstine.
Worked and lived in Africa as an expat.
Takes an active part as a volunteer for the international community.
Believes in international solidarity and wants the international community in Aalborg to be more aware of their rights.
lassefj.dk
lassefj.dk
lassefj.dk
CCHATGPT (GENERATIVE PRE-TRAINED TRANSFOMER) is a general-purpose chatbot that uses artificial intelligence to generate text after a user enters a prompt developed by tech startup OpenAI. The latest chatbot uses GPT-4, a large language model that allows deep learning to produce human-like text.
ChatGPT, OpenAI's text-generating AI chatbot, has taken the world by storm. It can write essays, code and even more if given short text prompts - hyper-charging productivity. However, it also has a potentially negative side.
Writing an essay aims to prove you can think, so this short circuits the process and defeats the purpose. But, again, in terms of consequences, if we cannot let people carry out homework assignments because we no longer know whether they are cheating or not, that means that everything has to happen in the classroom and must be supervised.
More assignments must then be done orally, and what does that mean? It means that the learning process will become much more expensive - at a time when we are trying to do the opposite. The consequences for higher education could potentially be devastating in terms of the way tertiary education as we know it today is carried out.
OpenAI Inc. is a nonprofit organisation whose sole controlling shareholder is OpenAI LP. OpenAI LP, despite being a forprofit company, retains a formal fiduciary responsibility to OpenAI Inc.'s nonprofit charter.
The CEO behind the company that created ChatGPT (Sam Altman) believes that this type of artificial intelligence technology will reshape society as we know it.
Elon Musk disowned OpenAI, the nonprofit organisation that he helped launch. This organisation is responsible for the AI sensation ChatGPT, which Microsoft is now effectively controlling.
There seems to be general agreement that this type of tool's impact will increase, and its use and effectiveness have expanded dramatically since its launch just a few months ago. For example, major brands
experiment with AI to generate ads and marketing copy.
Microsoft has incorporated OpenAI's GPT models into Microsoft Office, Microsoft Teams and Bing. They also use OpenAI technology to improve their Bot Framework, a development platform for building conversational agents. In addition, they have announced that they will invest USD 10 billion in this new technology.
OPENAI GPT-4
OpenAI is also heavily investing in the technology. ChatGPT was recently supercharged by a new GPT-4 model - the latest language-writing model from OpenAI's labs. Paying ChatGPT users have access to GPT-4, which can write more naturally and fluently than the model that previously powered ChatGPT.
In addition to GPT-4, OpenAI recently connected ChatGPT to the Internet with plugins available for users and developers in the alpha test phase.
THE HISTORY OF ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE
Alan Turing was The first person who brought this type of technology to everyone's attention. His research in the early 1950s laid the foundation for modern computer science at a time when AI was still a thing out of fiction novels, but it was enough to get more brilliant minds on board. Among those who developed an interest was John McCarthy, who coined the term "artificial intelligence" in 1956.
McCarthy and his colleagues set up an Artificial Intelligence project at MIT two years later. The future of AI research was starting to look bright but was still in its early development phase. Then, in the 1990s, advancements in machine learning and natural language processing (NLP) resulted in renewed interest in artificial intelligence.
Over 65 years after Turing's breakthrough paper, the rapid expansion of AI systems raised a few eyebrows. It also made some people worried about the direction it was heading.
However, in 2015, CEO Sam Altman and business "magnet" Elon Musk spearheaded an initiative for safe and open AI development. This was when the history of the company OpenAI began to take shape. Three years later, the company released a paper, "Improving Language Understanding by Generative Pre-Training", - introducing the concept of a Generative Pretrained Transformer (GPT).
In a nutshell, GPTs are neural networks—machine learning models inspired by the structure and function of the human brain. They are trained on a large dataset of human-generated text that can be used to perform many functions like generating and answering questions - among other things. THE-INTL
PRESIDENT & CEO OXFORD BUSINESS SERVICES APS
Mariano has over 40 years global experience as a bus iness executive. He spent ten years with KPMG, so far thirty years with British Chambers of Commerce (while also running Oxford Business Services ApS). He is a British citizen, who grew up in Kent, went to boarding school in Sussex and has a British university education. He has been married to a Dane for over 45 years and has held over 150 official anti-Brexit speeches since 2016. He both speaks and writes Danish without difficulty.
oxford-business.com
FLAKY CHICKEN PIES ARE A TASTY SNACK FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY TO ENJOY!
PHOTOGRAPHS & TEXT: NATASHA LIVIERO / UNSPLASH
MAKES APPROXIMATELY 24 PIES
INGREDIENTS:
80g leeks/onion, finely chopped
4g/1 clove garlic, finely chopped
3 sprigs thyme
30g unsalted butter
80g streaky bacon, chopped
300g cooked chicken, shredded
25g flour
METHOD:
1. Set oven to 2200/2000 fan.
2. Grease 2 x baking trays.
200g chicken stock
200g cream
15g Dijon mustard
25g parmesan cheese, grated
salt and pepper to taste
1kg puff pastry
1 egg, beaten
3. In a large frying pan, sauté the onions/leeks, garlic, thyme and butter for a few minutes.
4. Add the bacon and sauté until the onion is translucent.
5. Add the chicken and stir until combined.
6. Mix in the flour, followed by the stock and cream. Heat over medium heat until the mixture thickens.
7. Add Dijon mustard and parmesan cheese and stir to combine.
8. Season with salt and pepper, and remove the thyme sprigs.
9. Spread out the puff pastry and cut 24 x 7/8cm circles with a cookie cutter.
10. Place 12 pastry circles onto a baking sheet and spoon the chicken mixture into the centre of each circle. Don’t overfill the circles - the pastry will burst open when baking.
11. Brush a 1cm border around the pastry with the egg wash without touching the chicken mixture.
12. With the remaining 12 circles, gently place them over the chicken mixture and press down around the border, ensuring the two circles stick together.
13. With the tines of a fork, press around the border of the pastry to further seal the two circles together. Dip the fork into flour to prevent it from sticking to the pastry.
14. Repeat until all the pastry has been used.
15. Gently brush the pies with the remaining egg wash and bake for 20 minutes and golden brown.
16. Remove from the oven and place on a cooling rack. They are best eaten warm on the day they are made.
NATASHA LIVIERO - PASTRY CHEF
Notes:
* The leftover chicken mixture can be used for sandwiches or crackers.
* You may use up all the chicken mixture with additional puff pastry and freeze for up to 3 months. Then, bake from frozen for a few extra minutes.
* Should your pies burst - where possible, once removed from the oven, simply spoon the mixture back into the pastry case and gently press the pastry back into shape.
Natasha is a pastry chef who is South African by birth and Croatian by blood. She spent many years working for a wellness publication but did an about-turn at the beginning of 2020 when she joined a culinary school to fulfil a lifelong dream to study patisserie. She’s passionate about European patisserie and loves spending time in the kitchen experimenting with recipes (while quibbling with her fe-line friends), and is always on the hunt for interesting new cookbooks.
natashaliviero
"IS IT TRUE what they say…that a daughter's first love is her dad?" I understand the answer to this question is relative to the person answering, but for the following 653 words… my inspiration will come from my dad. Masculine fashion (yep…jumping right to the topic at hand) is an ode to all dads worldwide. Who would've thought that your father's weekend mowing the lawn outfit would be a saturated 'fit check' now? Similar to the mom jean effect, adding the word 'Dad' to any article of clothing automatically increases its retro appeal.
#1 The Dad Hat
This is the most effortless accessory to enter the 'Dad/Masculine' fashion realm. Throwing on a faded and boneless snapback or baseball cap and viola. Dad hats can be seen all over the streets of your favourite style influencers. Not only are they trend-appropriate, but they also serve functional purposes too. We all crave the secrets of slowing the ageing process - sun exposure is a notorious culprit. So wearing a hat also helps to decrease the UV radiation…but with style.
#2 The Dad Blazer
"Do you remember going into your dad's closet and trying on his clothes?"... "Oh wait… maybe it's your mom's closet?" I think it's safe to say that I preferred more masculine structures…even as a mini fashionista. Oversized clothing seems to be a movement that continues to gain traction. Little to no thought can go into the foundation of your outfit, but as soon as you put on a dad blazer…it becomes classic.
#3 The Dad Sneaker
'I still cannot believe that my 2nd-grade pair of sneakers are in style' However, I am shamelessly guilty of buying into the dad sneaker look. New Balance has had this fad in a headlock, and I must admit the sneakers are comfortable…good posture approved. The fact that I can 'twinning' with my father is just an added bonus. If you combine the first three paragraphs of this article, it's already a fashion win (just a bit cheeky - sorry, Dad).
#4 The Boyfriend Jeans (Or Dad jeans)
My husband absolutely 'loves' the masculine trend and never wonders where his clothes have disappeared to. So now that I have properly gotten the sarcasm out of the way let's dive into denim for him and her. Baggy jeans (esp cargo) have been an all-year-round staple for most. Like the mom jean, the structure includes various body shapes and sizes. So you will be happy with the loose design if you are rocking his jeans with a crop top or 'dad shirt' (a foreshadowing to the next paragraph).
#5 The Dad Shirt
When I imagine what a dad shirt means to me - I picture a 'Weekend At Bernie's'. I may be revealing my age and generation, but you (yes, you…reading this) are like family to me…so that's okay. The fact that our dads put no effort into the now coveted looks is irony at its finest. Think of your dad's vacation shirt, barbecuing top, or his most cherished lounging around the house jersey and imagine you wearing it. Hawaiian shirt vibes paired with socks and loafers have been getting a lot of social media love - and I am here for it.
#6 Dad Shorts
This last 'Dad Approved' piece is probably self-explanatory. The dad short is essentially the dad jeans cut DIY (Do it yourself) style. The structures can come in varieties such as Bermuda, cargo, and board shorts. The dad shorts are a more relaxed fit and complement many different body types. I love the lax fit; it allows me to add shape to my already boyish frame. "Can I confess something?"...I have worn my Dad shorts with cowboy boots combo at least four times this week.
My father is probably one of the most influential people in the core stages of early life. I am now even prouder that I can officially dress like him too. Among other things, I wanted to mention you can achieve all of these looks sustainably and thrift your dad. Happy Father's Day to him! THE-INTL
Dubbed the 'Jill Of All Trades', Vanessa hails from the sunshine state of Florida. After visiting Copenhagen several times as a former International Flight Attendant, she permanently settled in Denmark in 2017 with her husband. Currently, Vanessa is the owner of the hand-crafted jewellery brand, the Style Freed. She creates personalised jewellery centred around healing crystals worldwide. Being a creative "mompreneur' has also allowed Vanessa to focus on her son's developmental journey with autism in Denmark.
@stylefreed @thestylefreed @stylefreed
THE TERM “MOTHER TONGUE” IS HIGHLY GENDERED, WITH MANY EUROPEAN LANGUAGES USING THIS TERM TO DESCRIBE SOMEONE’S FIRST LANGUAGE. THE TERM IS HIGHLY REDUCTIVE FOR THIRD-CULTURE KIDS OR MULTI-NATIONAL FAMILIES, AND LANGUAGE RARELY WORKS SO SIMPLY. SO, HOW IMPORTANT IS IT TO PASS ON A LANGUAGE, AND HOW DO WE TALK ABOUT DOING SO?
TTHE LANGUAGE OF linguistics can be hard to wrap your head around, especially if you grew up in a monolingual environment. Many terms, such as bilingual, get used differently by different people. Some claim you speak both languages equally since birth, while others use it to show fluency in two languages. The term heritage language can be helpful for families that have been mobile over multiple generations: this is typically used to describe a language that comes from a previous generation, such as a grandparent, that is understood and spoken at a less than fluent level and sometimes only used in limited environments. My favourite experience with a heritage language is a Norwegian-British friend who has Pakistani roots but speaks very little Urdu or Punjabi, his heritage languages. Despite this, he still uses Punjabi to swear while watching cricket!
The most popular, successful model for raising multi-lingual children is the one-language one-parent model, ensuring children get regular, consistent input from native-speaker parents. In this case, parent X would speak Xish, and parent Y would speak Yish, leading to a bilingual child. However, this isn’t a one size fits all solution and can be unworkable for families where more than two languages are spoken or where the child is getting more input from one language than the other. Children also typically wish to fit in with their peers, making “foreign” languages uncool and halting their progress. But, even when children speak both languages, reading and writing are also important points to tackle. Depending on the language, this can vary with difficulty, as world languages have many resources, while more minor languages or dialects have fewer.
Some who grew up in colonial or post-colonial societies choose not to pass on their local languages to children, speaking settler languages exclusively in the belief that this is in some way better. In other cases, children who attend school in settler languages lose the ability to speak their mother tongues. This can and does create a sense of a lack of identity and security for the children it affects. In Denmark, there is a famous and unfortunate case of a 1950s experiment where Greenlandic children were sent to Danish foster families and Danish-speaking boarding schools. This led to many of them being unable to speak Greenlandic and prevented them from later connecting with their parents and home communities, with devastating effects.
I grew up with English as a home language, Swiss-German and German as day-to-day languages, and two heritage languages, which I understand to some degree but never learnt to speak. At times, German certainly felt more natural to me than my “moth-
er” tongue of English, much to my mother’s frustration! I remember stubbornly speaking German to her in public as a child, not wanting to engage with English at all. If my husband and I have children, there will be four languages to choose from, as we speak Danish. This makes the one-language one-parent model challenging, and we would have to find a different way to ensure we passed on the languages we chose.
However, if you haven’t passed on your language to your child from the start, be assured that all hope is not lost! You could start anytime, or your child could become interested later. For example, my husband’s family share a love for France, which has led to four generations of them now speaking the language despite it never being passed on in the home. Hopefully, this proves that even if a language isn’t passed on in the home at a young age, children can still acquire it if a keen interest in the culture is fostered. THE-INTL
"Children also typically wish to fit in with their peers, making “foreign” languages uncool and halting their progress."
Heather Storgaard comes from Northern Scotland, grew up in Switzerland, and lived in England and Germany. She met her Danish and soon-tobe British husband back in 2017, and they now split their time between Central Scotland and Helgenæs, a peninsula in rural Eastern Jutland. Suitably for a Scot, Heather works with whisky, spending her time writing and translating, with a particular softspot for the up-and-coming world of Nordic Whisky.
@heatherstorgaard
LLONG GONE ARE the days when women had a baby, and the man took the afternoon off and then went back to work. The option of men taking paternity leave has changed enormously in my lifetime and since I had children.
DENMARK
As of 2nd August 2022 in Denmark, each parent is entitled to 24 weeks. The model is known as the 24-24 model so that dad can take:
Two weeks at the time of the birth
Nine weeks before the child turns one (non-transferrable) and
Thirteen weeks before the child turns one (transferrable).
How much dads are paid depends on the company. Men can claim paternity benefits based on their hourly rate for up to 24 weeks if the company money stops.
It was common to see young dads with their little ones in coffee shops together in groups. I thought that was amazing because it didn’t exist in the UK at that time. This time gives Dad insight into how hard being a parent is.
In the UK, the rules are clear for dads, but companies have a lot of scope for generosity. Dads are entitled to 2 weeks of paternity pay at the beginning, paternity pay during the first year and shared leave. Shared leave in the UK means 50 weeks and up to 37 weeks of pay between parents. So far, not that different. The difference comes in the amount dads receive. Some packages are very generous, and others not so much.
When I had my first child 13 years ago, my husband got two weeks off at full pay, but he was the only one of six fathers in our baby group who did. The other men got the leave but sadly no pay or had to take annual leave. Thirteen years later and things have changed a lot. My brother-in-law is taking a year off work, which I find unbelievable. As a government employee, he is entitled to the same leave and pay as a mother. He will be paid six months like I was on maternity leave. My physio told me recently that his male friend at one company would take a year off and be fully paid for a year. These are the most generous ones I have heard of.
Norway, Sweden and Iceland top the table in family-friendly policies, but the countries that top the list for paternity leave will surprise you. According to the OCED, it’s Japan, South Korea, and Portugal. Japan offers an astonishing 30 weeks of paid leave at a full-time rate. I lived in Japan when I was younger, so if I’m honest, I do find this surprising. The OECD also confirms very few fathers in Japan take this leave sadly. The recent change in Denmark would move it right up the league table now.
WHICH COUNTRIES HAVE WORK TO DO TO SUPPORT FAMILIES?
You won’t be surprised to find Canada or the USA at the bottom of this league. Still, you might be surprised to find Cyprus, New Zealand, Switzerland, and many other European countries. Let’s hope these countries see the benefits of improving leave for men soon. THE-INTL
TTHE MONTH OF June celebrates fathers, and as my diary reminds me to send a card, I take a moment to consider the role my father played in my life in the era of traditional fatherhood.
A father was considered the head of the family. My father was the overseer of our nuclear family. He approached the role with a very authoritative spirit. Negotiation was not something he entertained!
He set the rules by which he expected us to behave and live. For example, we had to be respectful, work hard at school, bring home a strong report card, keep our bedrooms tidy, help our mum with household chores, etc.
He was the disciplinarian who decided what consequences would be issued for misbehaviour. His favourite 'punishment' was sending me outside to turn over the soil and de-weed flowerbeds in the garden!
He had a good job, but my mother also worked. She had a lowpaid job; thus, he was the family's 'main provider', who oversaw all household expenses, budgets, and savings. My mother had not much influence in this area.
He was also a remote and aloof man. He was not one who would show his love in a demonstrative fashion. Instead, any emotional display would come from our mother.
And, along the same theme, sadly, he appeared too 'busy' with administrative tasks or household upgrades, so he was not one to take us to the park or swimming or collect us from a social event. It seemed as if this was not a good use of his time. This was 'woman's work'.
Half a century and more has passed, and there has, fortunately, been a huge shift away from this traditional father role.
In Denmark, fathers are clearly recognised as equals in a relationship, not superior. This is highlighted by the fact that fathers, by law, can enjoy equal paternity leave. When a child is born, fathers are provided with two weeks of paternity leave to encourage the connection between a newborn and a father and help with the new routines. They are then expected to take another 9 weeks, and 13 weeks can be negotiated between a couple. This indicates that fatherhood is a man's responsibility and not just a female one, which was part of the traditional model.
The opportunity to spend time with the family and be involved with the upbringing of one's child brings many benefits to the child and the child's mother. For example, in a household where a father is actively involved in a child's upbringing, a child is more likely to develop socially and emotionally, have a good sense of respectful behaviour, and do well at school. Researchers also commented that an involved father can help to prevent teenage girls from falling into depression, drug dependency, or pregnancy as they have a positive male role model and greater emotional security.
The supportive fatherly approach, rather than the authoritative one, involves being an advice giver, a listener, and someone who encourages discussion regarding household rules and consequences. The stance is to foster a mutually valued understand-
ing rather than a top-down ruling. As a result, a child can have a voice and the chance to self-advocate. These are vital skills needed to navigate today's complex world.
A balanced family household of equals provides a woman with the opportunity to return to work. This can influence the economic situation and reduce any financial worries. It also retains a woman's status as an individual with choices. This is important to a mother's well-being, as it can reduce feelings of little self-worth or dependency. In addition, a more equitable sharing of tasks allows each partner to better appreciate family life demands. This, in turn, enhances the support each partner gives to one another, which helps to sustain partnerships.
It is important to note that the examples here depict a typical nuclear family. However, today's society has a much wider spectrum of recognised households. It is no longer the case that father figures need to be male. The crucial factors are the interactions, approach, and love bestowed on a child within a family unit. These are the core of providing a child with a solid foundation in life from which they can springboard. THE-INTL
Sources:
https://www.continued.com/early-childhood-education/ask-the-experts/ what-three-primary-roles-father-23462#:~:text=Through%20almost%20 every%20studied%20culture,roles%20as%20much%20as%20fathers. https://www.askmomparenting.com/traditional-parenting-vs-modern-parenting/#:~:text=Traditional%20parenting%20refers%20to%20 a,holding%20children%20to%20high%20expectations. https://www.latimes.com/socal/daily-pilot/opinion/tn-dpt-me-patrice-apodaca-column-20170612-story.html
Monika comes from the London area of the UK, where she worked in the state system and the international school system, as an English teacher of 11-18 students and then a section leader. She has also worked in Germany and now in Denmark. She has an overview of the British, International, and American educational systems and is currently learning about the Danish system. She has been in education for 32 years and continues to enjoy the profession. She has relocated to Copenhagen as she is married to a Dane. She enjoys jogging, waterside walks, and cooking.
@monikapedersen
@monikapedersen
@monikapedersen
"The opportunity to spend time with the family and be involved with the upbringing of one's child brings many benefits to the child and the child's mother."PHOTOGRAPHS UNSPLASH TEXT MONIKA PEDERSEN
##SIGUNDSKYLD, OR #SAYSORRY, is the request for an official apology from the Danish government - an initiative started by Christopher Trung Paulsen, a politician in Slagelse Kommune. But an apology for what? For the neglect and abuse people with disabilities faced if they were placed in special care institutions run by the state from 1933 to 1980.
On their website, the initiative #SigUndskyld details three reasons why the state should apologise:
According to the report published by Danmarks Forsorgs Museum (Denmark's Welfare Museum) in 2022, violence, coercion, sexual assault, abuse, neglect, experimental treatment, and wrong placements were a significant part of the life of children and adults who were placed in Danish special care institutions - and with no intervention from the state.
Despite Denmark's ratification of the European Convention on Human Rights in 1953, the state supervision of special needs institutions was deficient, and injustice, neglect, and abuse were allowed to continue.
As many of the people affected in this period are still alive today, an official apology may help pave the way to healing from these people's traumas.
The website states that approximately 20-30.000 people with disabilities had the right to special assistance to compensate for their disabilities, and about half were placed in special care institutions.
Christopher started planning the #SigUndskyld initiative about a year ago, and the website has been up since February of this year. "For a long time, I had been aware of the injustices people with disabilities faced during the special care period from 1933 to 1980. I was deeply moved by the stories of those who had suffered, and I felt that it was important to take action to acknowledge their pain
and seek justice for them," he says.
His interest in this matter stems from his firm belief that everyone deserves to be treated with dignity and respect regardless of their physical or mental capabilities. Christopher explains his motivation, "It is unacceptable that so many people with disabilities were subjected to such horrific treatment, and I felt a deep sense of responsibility to do something about it. Some of my friends told me that we should let the past be past, but many people from that period are still alive today, and that's what makes it different."
"I have a strong feeling of justice, probably due to my autism. As a kid, I attended a special education school in an area previously known as 'Andersvænge' (a large staterun special care institution). So I have seen several of those who grew up in the 'særforsorg' or special care institutions and were subjected to horrible treatment."
Christopher got help and feedback from the chairman of the local care museum ("Dansk Forsorgshistorisk Museum") on how he could try to get the government to apologise, "To achieve an official apology from the government, I knew I needed to continue to build momentum and gath-
MICHAELA MEDVEDOVÁ comes from Slovakia and moved to Denmark 3 years ago to study for her Master's degree. She says living in Odense is the perfect city for her because it's not too large to be intimidating, but still exciting! She works at Umbraco as a Magical Copy Whisperer and started a podcast with her friends - @humans.of.sdu. She loves watching and talking about movies, Harry Potter, karaoke nights (even though she can't sing to save her life), and pub quizzes (winning them, to be specific).
er support from a broad range of individuals and organisations." The #SigUndskyld website features numerous stories and testimonials of people affected by this time period, and Christopher selected from the historical accounts. In addition, Christopher reached out to individuals and organisations advocating for the rights of people with disabilities. "I selected stories that I felt were representative of the experiences of many individuals. In addition, there has been a historical account of the events during this time, which I also referred to."
The Minister of Social Affairs and Housing, Pernille Rosenkrantz-Theil, has already agreed to issue an official apology on behalf of the Danish government, and the apology was planned to take place at Danmarks Forsorgs Museum on May 8th. However, the minister postponed the apology until after the summer, citing: "a great desire of many to participate in the event."
Christopher was thrilled to hear that the Danish government had agreed to give an official apology - however, he does not see his work as being finished. "Going forward, I will continue to work to ensure that the government follows through on its commitment to apologise and make amends. This is especially important after the government delayed the apology until after the summer."
He says the form of the official apology is still to be determined, but Christopher hopes it will be a meaningful gesture of acknowledgement and remorse from the government. "I believe that an official apology could have a powerful impact on our society today by raising awareness of the injustices that people with disabilities have faced in the past and inspiring greater empathy and understanding for their struggles. I hope it will also serve as a reminder that we must always be vigilant in protecting the rights and dignity of all individuals, regardless of their abilities." THE-INTL
SARA R. NEWELL is from Canada, went to high-school in Costa Rica, and has worked and studied in Iceland and Denmark. She is a disability rights activist and has a master's degree in Technological Business Development and Biomedical Engineering from Aarhus University. Sara has lived in Denmark since 2003, and lives with her husband and daughter. She hopes to contribute and share insights with others who have children with disabilities. https://www.linkedin.com/in/sararose-newell-b1904726 / https://m.facebook.com/groups/bakopomdepaarorende
LLAST MONTH I briefly talked about setting boundaries with yourself and for yourself, this month, let’s talk a bit about the friendship realm.
Friendship is such a pure and complex realm. Like any other relationship, it involves a lot of emotions, feelings, expectations and understanding. We meet people from all walks of life at every age - some stay, some go, it is a choice, and it is also not a choice sometimes. While I sincerely wish for everyone to have the best friends with the purest intention at heart, life isn’t always that simple. Although, like every connection, friendship also needs mutual time and effort to cultivate, it is sometimes the most long-lasting and fulfilling one can have in life- because they are for life.
Making new friends can be tricky, especially for the introverted or lacking access to meet new human beings. As expats in Denmark, it is one of the most difficult challenges for many who don’t already have an existing network here. I am blessed to have an extensive network of friends in different countries and friends from when I was a child till this day, but I have also let friends go, ended some friendships, and abruptly dropped. Friendship breakups are hard. Sometimes, it makes you realise as an adult, friendship only goes as far as when it’s convenient for the other party. Setting and maintaining certain boundaries is vital to cultivating and nurturing childhood or adult friendships. However, it is hard because as one grows older, it gets harder to make new friends, and it takes so much effort to maintain. Therefore, giving in to things you’re not 100% aligned with, agreed with, or even enjoy is very easy because you don’t want to jeopardise the bond. I’m not going to argue if a true bond is unbreakable or if soulmates are for life, but I will stress the importance of knowing when enough is enough and if you should let go.
Now you may wonder, why would you let go of a friend? There are many types of friends. Some only think of you when they need something. Some only get along when you socialise. Some you can talk about everything and confide in. Some are just fleeting visits at a particular stage in life. Some-
times friends take so much comfort in one another and grow dependent on them. They become the lifeline, the emotional anchor, the comfort, the shelter. Isn’t this what friends are for? Yes and no. So often, we take friends for granted, expecting them to be there, assuming they can hold whatever we throw at a time without asking if they can. We forget our friends are also like us - having a lot on their plates, going through different things and stress in life, have emotions and bad days. As a caring friend, it is essential to set a firm boundary and respect that it is ok to say no to a friend when you have too much on your plate. You cannot pour from an empty glass. It is emotionally and mentally draining when someone wants more energy and attention from you when you cannot offer it. The worst? You feel bad and guilty for being a bad friend, not lending a hand, not being there. But how can you when you have reached your total capacity? Your friend’s life is not your responsibility. It is also true the other way round - you don’t have to share every secret or detail of your life with your friend, and you are not obliged to join every social gathering or say yes to every dinner invite. While I’m not suggesting dropping a
friend the moment they ask for help (you also don’t want that kind of person in your life if they drop you as soon as you need some help) but having a boundary and politely tell them you’d love to be there for them as support, just not as much as they require is an excellent way to go. A mature friend will understand and respect that. It is healthy and respectful for both parties. You can be close and feel connected while keeping a boundary.
Looking after yourself is not selfish. You need to be able to hold space for them and identify what they are seeking from you. Is it to seek validation? To use you to fill an emotional void? Projecting all their stress, insecurities, and expectation onto you? What is it?
This goes the other way, too - instead of emotional dumping, just ask, ‘I’d like to share some of my thoughts. Do you have the capacity to listen?’ And if your friend says no, it’s ok because everyone can say no, and do what they can manage. It doesn’t make them a bad friend; it also doesn’t make you a bad friend when you do that. As you do that, you will very soon realise who are your real friends, who’s there for you and who can give you a loving and caring friendship that lasts long. THE-INTL
Like her hometown Hong Kong, Ophelia has a diverse background and upbringing. She moved to Copenhagen in 2019 after 10 years of living in London. Her fashion and journalism career began in 2007 at ELLE Hong Kong magazine, and later on as an online stylist at Net-A-Porter.com in the UK; she has worked with all sorts of creatives, brands and celebrities globally. She now works on everything fashion and communicationrelated. With her love of travelling and places her work brought her to, people she met from all walks of life inspired her to start her own business M for Minimal: a place to raise the awareness of going back to basics through conscious consumption and mindfulness with a touch of spirituality - something she has been practising since her teenage years. @mforminimal.com @mforminimal.mfm @opheliawu
ALTHOUGH DANES DON'T HAVE A PATENT ON HOW TO RAISE CHILDREN, THEY CAN BE AN INSPIRATION. LET'S DISCOVER THE DANISH WAY OF PARENTING.
SSCANDINAVIAN HAPPINESS AND satisfaction with life are the mirror of society and have roots in family life. Dane Iben Dissing Sandahl and American Jessica Joelle Alexander, authors of the international bestseller, defined six key factors influencing childhood happiness. Play, authenticity, reframing, empathy, no ultimatums and togetherness. P-A-R-E-N-T password is easy to remember but very important for mindful parenting.
We live in a world where busyness and productivity are the top priority for success. And we are teaching our children to do the same. We are showing them that playing is a waste of time. But enough play is essential to physical and emotional wellbeing and a critical factor in developing children's skills. Children learn best when left to their own devices in a community with other children of all ages and abilities, with only the support of coaches and play leaders.
In his text Give Childhood Back to Children, psychologist Peter Grey says that the most important skills children must learn to live happy, productive, moral lives cannot be taught in school. They are learned and practised by children in play. These include thinking creatively, getting along with other people and cooperating effectively, and controlling their impulses and emotions.
AUTHENTICITY
Living an authentic and honest life as a parent can guide our children to be courageously true to themselves and others. Remember that children always observe our feelings and how we express them. All emotions are okay, but self-deception is confusing and sends the wrong message to our kids.
"If we teach our children to recognise and accept their authentic feelings, good or bad, and act in a way consistent with their values, the challenges and rough patches in life, we won't topple them. They will know that they have acted in accord-
ance with what feels right. They will know to recognise and respect their limits," authors Jessica Joelle Alexander and Iben Dissing Sandahl wrote in the book The Danish Way of Parenting
The Danes use less limiting and more supporting language when talking with their children. It means that instead of saying how their kids are or what they should do or feel, they try to lead children to understand the reasons for their behaviour and to see the situation from different angles. Reframing can change the perspective of how we describe ourselves and our picture of the world. And it can help our children to focus on a better storyline. This skill will be essential and valuable for their future.
Several kinds of research indicate that we have innate empathy, and even a fewmonth-old baby tends to those who treat others well. However, with the wrong approach, we can completely suppress this empathy in children and raise them to be non-empathetic adults.
My daughter's kindergarten has a weekly activity with a teddy bear, during which kids learn to recognise and understand human emotions. This small activity can improve empathy a lot. Danish parents
and pedagogues teach children to tolerance and not-judging. For example, hearing them talking negatively about other children is rare. On the contrary, they encourage children to see the good in others.
Spanking as a form of disciplining a child is something unthinkable in Denmark. Danes prefer democratic and respectful parenting. Respect goes both ways – you have to give it to receive it.
"They establish rules and guidelines that their children are expected to follow. However, they are very responsive to their children's questions about the rules. Danes see children as intrinsically good and react to them accordingly," authors of The Danish Way of Parenting wrote
Being together as a family in a hygge atmosphere is essential for Danes, and kids are thrilled to be together and cosy around. Playing together, reading together, cooking together, eating together – all these activities are valuable for the joyful life of our children.
Family togetherness fosters a feeling of safety, connection to others, and well-being. And what is most important, seeing the family together brings unforgettable memories for children, from which they will draw their entire adult lives. THE-INTL
Natalia is a Slovak journalist based in Aalborg, Denmark. She has around 15 years of experience in journalism. Her experiences as an editor and a reporter were founded in Slovak magazines and newspapers. She was also working as a TV reporter, a TV moderator and a host in radio broadcasting. Part of her career included working with PR and marketing. Natália is also a content creator on her social media. Follow her blog www.mamavdansku.com , where she writes about life in Denmark.
@Natália Šepitková @Mama v Dánsku @Mum in Denmark
"SPANKING AS A FORM OF DISCIPLINING A CHILD IS SOMETHING UNTHINKABLE IN DENMARK. DANES PREFER DEMOCRATIC AND RESPECTFUL PARENTING."
WWRESTLING WITH THE father identity while navigating the complexities of expat life is a profound endeavour that requires introspection, adaptability, and a commitment to authenticity.
My male clients bring three recurring themes to sessions regarding raising their children in Denmark.
Expat fathers are often the primary breadwinner in their families – not always, but often. Finding the balance to excel professionally while entering a new culture like the Danish, where parents are actively involved in their children's lives, sports, and schoolwork, puts extra pressure on expat-fathers. The couples I meet in my clinic (single and dual-career couples) experience conflicts revolving around the issue of involvement and the feeling of inadequacy in meeting expectations of the new culture. Finding the balance of Danish family logistics can provoke old conflicts to resurface and might need a readjustment of parenting expectations.
Expat parents confront unfamiliar cultural norms, values, and legislation that can differ significantly from their cultural background. Despite Denmark's high trust and safe environment, many fathers raise concerns about bringing their children up in the Danish youth culture where freedom, drinking and gap years are the norms. In some fathers, it ignites a need to increase parenting control, and the cultural clash between fathers and young adults can create conflicts in the family and with the other parent.
When I meet fathers with these very valid concerns, they know it calls for deep introspection and evaluation of which norms and values to hold on to and which to renegotiate in alignment with local culture. Fathers, like mothers, must examine why the norms or rules are essential and how to adapt to the new culture without losing authenticity.
When "New Nordic Parenting" meets patriarchic parenting, there is often an internal family system culture clash. It can leave fathers feeling confused about issues of discipline and consequences. My experience is that when expat-fathers discover that "New Nordic Parenting" is not a borderless approach to raising children but rather a dualistic approach engaging children with trust, recognition, equality and respect, international fathers embrace the approach and report experiencing closer relationships with their children.
The emotional toll of adjusting to a new culture, work culture and social network can exhaust even the most energetic person. In many cultures, there's still a bias towards men being emotionally strong(er) and less affected by international transitions.
However, culture shock, homesickness, stress, doubts, and loneliness also affect men – and fathers. Taking good care of your
emotional well-being – in due time – is an essential part of being able to engage and be present with your children. If you struggle, you're not the first father to experience challenging emotions in the wake of international transition, and I strongly recommend seeking professional help to work through your emotions, alone or with your partner.
When we feel challenged as parents, we might seek to control more or give up and withdraw. Neither strategy will bring us closer to our children or obtain what we hope for in terms of upbringing.
Recognising and proactively addressing these challenges can help expat-fathers thrive, maintain authenticity, and create a nurturing environment for their children, themselves, and their relationships. Every expat-father is unique, but no matter the challenge, it is never too late to readjust parenting styles and learn new strategies to engage and improve our relationship with our children. THE-INTL
Nanna Hauch is a Danish fourtime former expat, mother of three Third Culture Kids, licensed couple and family therapist, MPF specialised in the psychological aspects of expat life, global transitions and intercultural organisational dynamics.
She is a warm and analytical therapist and an experienced speaker and workshop facilitator and additionally holds a M.Sc. in Intercultural Management.
Nanna founded Expat Hero in 2018 to support internationals and their families to adjust to transitional life and increase mental health when living globally mobile lives.
You can read more on www. expathero.dk and connect with Nanna at +45 40110459 or email: welcome@expathero.dk
Let’s connect on social:
@Expat Hero
@Expat Hero
@Expat Hero
@Nanna Hauch
IIN THE FEBRUARY issue, I wrote about my Danish father-in-law’s cancer and our difficulties finding a balance between caring for him and ourselves. He passed away a couple of weeks later, having enjoyed his last few weeks surrounded by family, friends and even an old flame, who came to the hospital and reminisced about their youthful adventures living abroad. Recently, as my husband and I was starting to feel a bit more like ourselves again, but still, deep in the bureaucratic tangle that comes with death, news broke that Region Midtjylland’s Aarhus Skejby Hospital had fired two directors due to breaking the patient guarantee for care and in addition to that the law. This sent me into a black hole of reading and the bleak realisation that the same department that had treated my father-in-law was affected.
Most foreigners in Denmark will learn quickly that trust is a crucial cornerstone of Danish identity. This trust allows parents to leave babies outside shops and cafes in their prams and in institutions such as the public healthcare system. I have honestly spent most of the last couple of years in disbelief that anyone can trust the Danish healthcare system to look after them and their loved ones. This isn’t a general distrust about public healthcare- my nan had the same kind of cancer as my father-inlaw and was treated with much more care and attention by the British NHS (ironically, often depicted as a failing system in the Scandinavian press). Now, it turns out that the department was rotten, explaining why our experiences diverged so much from others we spoke to.
As a foreigner in Denmark, it feels challenging to criticise institutions that Danes are proud of. In a nation where fitting in and sharing values is essential, complaining or making a scene is also frowned upon. Although it’s deeply unpleasant, I have been the noisy one kicking off at times- when the hospital wouldn’t prescribe morphine, ignored their own scan results at a pre-op appointment, and wouldn’t operate within the guaranteed time period. My Danish cancer vocabulary is now better than my English one, but I was still always conscious of being The Foreigner, with an accent and a different worldview, daring to criticise Denmark. And, when we talked to other Danes about our frustrations with the care, some were openly sceptical, which didn’t help my confidence. Of course, knowing what we all do now, that has totally changed. Suddenly, it is okay to talk about poor experiences with the hospital.
But why did Skejby break the patient guarantee to start with?
The short answer is budgets. Browsing Politiken, arguably Denmark’s most iconic newspaper, before sitting down to write this article, headlines screamed, “Denmark’s economy is bombproof”. The Government finds 16 million extra crowns” and “The problem in hospitals is not that they lack money….” So, with an
undeniably economically solid situation and well-funded hospitals, why did Aarhus’ shiny, relatively new Skejby hospital play with patients’ lives and break the law to save a bit here and there?
I doubt those of us affected will ever get a satisfactory answer. Reflecting on how it felt to attend appointments and be with my father-in-law before and after surgery, it felt like they had lost sight of recognising patients as people. And those same patients, often overwhelmed by life-changing diagnoses, trusted that the system was looking after them.
The Danish Government has announced that they will put 5 billion crowns towards strengthening the healthcare system, of which a large part will be assigned to improving cancer treatment. While this is positive news, it doesn’t bring back those who were let down by the system and aren’t here anymore. We’ll never know if my father-in-law could have lived longer had he been operated on faster, in accordance with the patient guarantee, but it is known that receiving quality care in a timely fashion is critical to fighting cancer. The entire scandal has brought back a lot of painful memories and niggles and what-ifs that will always stay with us. So, råbe højt, speak up, even if it makes you the noisy, awkward foreigner. Sticking up for the rights enshrined in Danish institutions clearly needs to be done, even if we agree to broadly trust them. THE-INTL
"As a foreigner in Denmark, it feels challenging to criticise institutions that Danes are proud of."
Heather Storgaard comes from Northern Scotland, grew up in Switzerland, and lived in England and Germany. She met her Danish and soon-tobe British husband back in 2017, and they now split their time between Central Scotland and Helgenæs, a peninsula in rural Eastern Jutland. Languages and cultural studies are a big passion, leading Heather to pursue a degree in Culture and Heritage and a career in photography and translation.
@heatherstorgaard
