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OUDAILY
The University of Oklahoma’s independent student voice since 1916
Protesters march down the South Oval after the 2019 racist incidents. Quote by Belinda Higgs Hyppolite.
CULTURE
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Norman brewery builds community, gives back
PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY CARLY OREWILER & CAITLYN EPES/THE DAILY
Marching forward: 1 year later After multiple racist incidents in 2019, university’s diversity leaders reflect on months of continued progress, acknowledge work left to do
On Sept. 22, 2019, Belinda Higgs Hyppolite traveled to OU’s Norman campus to interview for a position which, in the past year, had become one of the most important — and equally challenging — titles at the university. The potential difficulty was no deterrent for Higgs Hyppolite, who had worked in higher education for more than 24 years, including 15 as the assistant vice president for community support at the University of Central Florida, where she said she was called on to deal with the race and diversity issues which had plagued OU for the past year. O n t h e s a m e d ay Hi g g s Hyppolite was hoping to convince OU administrators she was the one to lead a revamped commitment to diversity on campus, OU was given another sobering reminder of how much work still needed to be done. “There was actually a blackface incident the day I came to campus,” said Higgs Hyppolite, OU’s new vice president for diversity and inclusion. “It came up in every interview, and I was just like, ‘Wow.’” The incident was reported by the Black Emergency Response Team on Sept. 22 after they became aware of a photo posted to an OU student’s social media. The photo depicted the student wearing a black charcoal face mask, with the caption “another day, another case.” BERT called out the post as another instance of blackface. Almost one year ago this week, the OU community faced two instances of blackface on campus. Students began to demand action, gathering for marches across campus and to the steps of Evans Hall, as well as rallies demanding varied administrative responses and an evaluation of how racism was handled on campus. One year later, OU is only days away from opening a new office for diversity and inclusion at OU. Despite the challenges of the last year, many see recent changes as steps in the right direction — but there are still challenges ahead.
REFLECTING ON THE PAST Despite the recent frequency of public racist incidents, Higgs Hyppolite said the incidents at OU do not necessarily indicate a university in crisis or make OU unique from other campuses. “There are racial incidents that occur on college campuses across the country, so OU is not unique in having to deal with challenges around culture, whether it be political ideology, world views, things of that nature,” Higgs Hyppolite said. “College campuses and higher ed institutions directly mimic what’s happening in the real world, so of course, some of those issues that would occur in the world will land squarely on our campuses.” Higgs Hyppolite said one of her priorities is to avoid a reactionary response to incidents involving race or other sensitive topics and to instead take a measured, educational approach to responding while advocating for the affected communities. Racist incidents are going to happen on a college campus, Higgs Hyppolite said — much like in other places across the country — but she hopes to use potential sources of outrage as learning opportunities for the offender, adding that many times a person’s intent does not match the impact their words or actions might have. “I think that redemption has to be a part of this work as well. I don’t want somebody to call me out and embarrassing me, so how then do I not do that to other people?” Higgs Hyppolite said. “Part of the campaign that I talked about, and my philosophy as I was interviewing for this position, was to really work from three points about awareness, education and advocacy.” OU Black Student Association president Breanna Hervey said she does not necessarily want to see someone expelled from the university immediately when involved in one of these incidents, seeing it as an educational opportunity like Higgs Hyppolite. But Hervey also said it is important that the university respond appropriately as a
reassurance to underrepresented communities that the behavior will not be tolerated. In the spring of 2019, BSA and other student leaders met with former OU President James Gallogly’s administration after what they saw as an insufficient response to the Jan. 18 blackface incident, but Hervey said the meetings often left them feeling frustrated with a lack of real progress. “(Gallogly) didn’t want to call the first blackface incident racist, and that was frustrating for our community because this is the president of our university sitting here to our face telling us, ‘This isn’t racism, we won’t call it that,’” Hervey said. “I do think President Gallogly was afraid of the backlash that he would get if he did say that ... but President Harroz was like, ‘I’m not scared to do that. I’m not scared to call out what I see.’” Her ve y appre ciate d the strength of interim OU President Joseph Harroz’s response to this incident compared to Gallogly’s statements in the spring, and Harroz’s willingness to engage with BSA members who are not executives. “The way that (the Sept. 22 incident) was handled was so much different from the first — not to slight anybody from the previous administration,” Hervey said. “(Harroz and Dean of Students David Surratt) made sure they came to our meetings, they talked to us about what we’d like to see change, talked to our students — which is really important because in the past, a lot of (administrators) had been just wanting to speak to the executive board.” George Henderson, OU professor emeritus and civil rights activist and researcher, said he is less concerned with the university’s response and more focused on actions being taken in the immediate aftermath of these incidents. Henderson has worked at OU for over 50 years since moving to Norman in 1967. Henderson also helped establish OU’s human relations department in 1970 and conducted decades of research into civil rights activism and higher
education. “I’m less interested in the response than I am the follow-through ... PR folks are paid to send something to news media,” Henderson said. “I want to know, now that you’ve sent it, what have you done? While we’re waiting for the surveys and reorganization to occur, lives are in the balance. Every president should be able to say, ‘Since that news release, this is what we’ve done.’” ADDRESSING THE PRESENT The university has communicated its willingness to review how it handles racism and improve overall campus diversity from the highest levels in the past year. When Harroz was selected in May 2019, he made early statements highlighting diversity and inclusion as his top priority. “One of the questions I was asked was this question of, ‘Is there a crisis around race?’ Diversity at large (also), but certainly race and ethnicity,” Harroz told The Daily in December. “We were in a serious moment, a moment we had to really think about — and not just think, but really directly address the challenges that we’re facing.” Harroz said he immediately prioritized diversity and inclusion after his selection, and he worked to avoid another “big crisis” following the string of racist incidents in the spring of 2019. Hervey said she has seen a major positive change in OU’s approach to diversity on campus since Harroz’s selection, praising his apparent commitment to expanding the Office of Diversity and Inclusion and other goals of the university’s diversity plan, which entered its second phase in August 2019 after Gallogly announced it in March 2019. The plan includes goals to recruit and retain a more diverse faculty, which was one of BSA’s demands after the January 2019 blackface incident. Part of the university’s diversity plan has been expanding the Office of Diversity and
Inclusion from “a handful” of employees to having diversity liaisons working with every college on campus, which Harroz said now numbers around 40 employees with roles in the office. Higgs Hyppolite has expressed a desire to adjust aspects of OU’s curriculum around diversity issues, which was also on the list submitted last January. “I do think it’s important for students to see themselves in the curriculum, to see folks who look and resemble them in the classroom. It just makes for a more pleasurable experience,” Higgs Hyppolite said. “There’s nothing more uncomfortable than walking into a space, and you’re the only one (like yourself ) — and throughout my educational experience and professional career, I’ve often walked into those spaces and experienced that.” Hervey said Higgs Hyppolite’s hiring is one of many examples she sees of Harroz making a more honest attempt to address some of BSA’s previous demands compared to other administrations. LOOKING TOWARD THE FUTURE Opinions are split on how far the university has come in addressing the underlying problems that motivate racist behavior since then. “If we’re still talking about it, we haven’t moved very far,” Henderson said. “We’re (just) as divisive now, in terms of separate communities, because we’ve been pandered to in order to allow us to have these separate safe places. I see no plan of bringing us together.” While Henderson said he does not believe OU has come as far as others may say, he did praise the work of student organizations like BERT for reclaiming responsibility for changing the culture around diversity issues on campus. “Instead of the faculty and staff calling the meetings, chairing the meetings and being the keynote speakers, let’s have the see ONE YEAR LATER page 2
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NEWS
• Jan. 21-26, 2020
OU strives for diversity, inclusion in new hires Experts say efforts could increase student retention BLAKE DOUGLAS @Blake_Doug918
Following a string of racist incidents in spring 2019, OU’s administration constructed a diversity and inclusion plan in February 2019 to improve campus inclusivity. A major action step of the plan’s initial phase was to “improve the overall sourcing/recruiting/hiring strategies for faculty and staff utilizing the annual Affirmative Action Plan,” according to OU’s website. With the plan’s second phase having begun in August 2019, university officials say efforts are underway to recruit a more diverse faculty. According to the fall 2018 university factbook, only 30 of 1,631 full-time faculty on the Norman campus were African American, with 43 identifying as Hispanic, 33 as Native American and 146 as Asian American. On Oct. 31, 2019, over 70 faculty attended a training to “provide practical and adaptable methods and strategies” to achieve the university’s goal of recruiting more diverse faculty and staff, said Jane Irungu, for-
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and skills.” The university has also implemented procedural steps to ensure that the candidate pools for vacant positions are including as many candidates of diverse backgrounds as possible, said Jill Irvine, vice provost of faculty. “The provost’s office has added a new step to the search process designed to support search committees in recruiting as diverse an applicant pool as possible,” Irvine said. “Search committees are asked to be more proactive in their recruitment efforts and to monitor the diversity of their applicant pools throughout the application period.” Before a search committee brings finalists to campus, Irvine said the committees will require approval from the offices of the appropriate dean and provost. Approval of the finalist pool will be based on the “demographic diversity” of the pool, as well as the committee’s efforts in recruiting for “inclusive excellence.” Cullinan said when hiring culturally competent candidates, the questions posed by search committees should look for practical, skill-based knowledge in curriculum and student interaction. “My focus is on making sure that we’re dealing with these as displays of knowl-
edge and skill sets, rather than as fake propositions or vague statements of attitude,” Cullinan said. Culturally competent faculty have a role well beyond simple instruction in the classroom, Irvine said, and should be able to help the university move toward accomplishing the goals stated in its diversity plan. “Campus leaders were urged to communicate the importance of moving toward this goal as we undertake what is arguably one of our most important tasks — the decisions we make about who will be OU’s future teachers, researchers and members of our community,” Irvine said. Eddie R. Cole, associate professor at the William &
Mary School of Education and an expert on college presidents and race, said the role of culturally competent faculty extends to an even more personal level with many students from underrepresented communities. This year, OU welcomed what administrators reported was one of the most diverse freshman classes in the school’s history. “A common issue nationally, that isn’t anything specifically tied to any region or any type of university, is when institutions quickly moved to diversify their student bodies across racial and ethnic lines, but they don’t do the same as quickly or at all regarding their faculty and staff makeup — you run into a number of issues,” Cole said. Cullinan said universities lacking culturally competent or diverse faculty often see disproportionate retention numbers between white students and students of minority communities, with underrepresented students leaving at higher rates. “There is no evidence that our white students are any brighter than our other students, but our other students are not treated well,” Cullinan said. “That’s where cultural competence becomes extremely important. Whenever we hire, we have an opportunity to bring in people that are going to not only add to the diversity, but add to our skill sets — work with us to increase the effectiveness of what we do.” The effort that faculty of color often put forward as mentors for underrepresented students at predominantly white institutions, on top of their usual duties in the classroom for all students, is just one example of how culturally competent faculty help improve campus diversity and student retention, Cole said. “When you are an African American faculty member, for example, there is a likelihood that you will be asked informally and formally to mentor and advise a number of student groups who feel underrepresented at a university like Oklahoma,” Cole said. “When you’re doing that sort of service, that doesn’t count for your scholarship, that doesn’t count for your classroom teaching, but you’re spending additional hours in your day.” Cole said that extra “legwork” from faculty of color creates an issue because this aspect of their work is not considered when evaluating for tenured positions. A lack of tenured faculty of color often leads to a “revolving
change how students are introduced to the diversity of people and opinions that they will encounter on a college campus, Hervey said, starting with reformation of OU’s first-year diversity experience training. “(University administrators) have been doing really good at bringing in people who know their stuff and who are ready to do the work in changing the programs,” Hervey said. “The Camp Crimson diversity program, the training that they do is changing. They’re bringing in people that can actively find better ways to advocate for people of color and marginalized groups here on campus, and better ways to get other people to understand those views and perspectives.” Higgs Hyppolite said she is working with her office to develop additional strategies to ensure this entrance training on diversity is not the “one-and-done” experience many students have had in the past, and instead becomes a part of “the fabric” of the university. “The way that you do that
is you begin to saturate the campus, so you have the student body president sending the same message as the president of the institution is sending,” Higgs Hyppolite said, “and you have the executive leader who is not only talking about, but role modeling, ‘What does diversity, equity and inclusion mean?’” Henderson warned that recruiting a diverse student body is not the same as diversifying the experience of students, however. “Just having bodies together, that’s desegregation, not integration,” Henderson said. “If I come to this university with virtually no people (of other cultures) who are friends, and I leave this university with no people from other cultures, I haven’t been provided an opportunity to become diverse. I share space, but I don’t share emotions, I don’t share dreams.” This week, the Office of Diversity and Inclusion will host its first Diversity, Equity and Inclusion Week, including a Martin Luther K i n g J r. r e m e m b r a n c e
The more diverse perspectives you have on the college campus, the more ideas there are to exchange and therefore the stronger your intellectual environment is.
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-Eddie R. Cole, associate professor at the William & Mary School of Education
mer interim vice president of diversity and inclusion. The training was presented by Cris Cullinan, a “nationally recognized facilitator in diversity, equity and inclusion,” Irungu said. The theme of the workshop was “hiring for cultural competency,” which Cullinan said was vital not only for changing the culture on campus, but better preparing graduates for jobs in the modern workplace. “The idea behind it is that we should be hiring faculty, administrators and staff that are culturally competent in order to best prepare our students (to) work in an interconnected 21st century world,” Cullinan said. “When we do that, we’re not just hiring for certain attitudes, we’re hiring for knowledge
ONE YEAR LATER: continued from page 1
students do the calling,” Henderson said. “I don’t look to administration to solve this. I think administrators will be concerned with their salaries and rewards and honors, and not always the lives of students who are living it, per se. People like me should be your resources, not your leaders.” From her personal experience, Hervey said the campus climate has changed for the better significantly since 2016, when she first arrived. “It really has been a difference — I do think that the climate here has changed,” Hervey said. “I can’t necessarily say that people are less racist ... but I feel like the climate has changed a little bit because there’s a system in place where, if you do something like this and you get caught, then something’s going to happen, at least under Harroz.” Plans are in motion to
REMAINING EVENTS FOR DIVERSITY, EQUITY AND INCLUSION WEEK Tuesday, Jan. 21
Martin Luther King Jr. remembrance march Evans Hall, 9:30 a.m.
Wednesday, Jan. 22
Dedication of the new Office of Diversity and Inclusion Copeland Hall, 1:30 p.m.
Thursday, Jan. 23
“Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women: An Evening with Abigail Echo-Hawk” Will Rogers Room at the Oklahoma Memorial Union, 6 p.m.
Friday, Jan. 24
Reception welcoming Belinda Higgs Hyppolite as the new director of diversity and inclusion Boyd House, 1 p.m.
Saturday, Jan. 25
Invitation-only gala honoring the legacy of Anita Hill More information available by contacting 405-325-2327
door” in which, while diverse faculty are being hired, they are not being retained to impact the campus long-term. “Universities are going to have to take a serious look at this evaluation model, in comparison to the contemporary demand in the current context on college campuses,” Cole said. “Now all of a sudden, you’re working to have a more diverse faculty, but your measure of evaluation remains the same. That’s not going to make it when you when you think about 2020 and onward.” The continuing shift of demographics across the U.S. means that colleges will need to move quickly to find culturally competent faculty to remain on the leading edge of education, Cullinan said, as the importance of
students learning to collaborate with people from varied backgrounds is crucial for entering the workforce. But hiring a diverse faculty does not mean sacrificing qualified candidates, Cole said. “The beauty of diversity is that colleges and universities — the foundation of them is the free exchange of ideas,” Cole said. “The more diverse perspectives you have on the college campus, the more ideas there are to exchange and therefore the stronger your intellectual environment is.” Irvine said the university’s faculty and administrators have developed an “ongoing commitment” to three core diversity values when recruiting faculty to the university: that the best
teachers are aware of their own implicit biases and can help develop students from varied backgrounds to their highest potential, that the best researchers are able to challenge their own perceptions and recognize their own biases, and that the best leaders understand the need for varied cultural perspectives to create a stronger institution. Several searches for currently vacant positions are underway or recently started, Irvine said, and she expects the overall impact of the university’s new hiring methods should be able to be evaluated by the end of the academic year. Blake Douglas
bdoug99@ou.edu
JACKSON STEWART/THE DAILY
Vice President of Diversity and Inclusion Belinda Higgs Hyppolite in Evans Hall on Jan. 16.
march. New office spaces for the Office of Diversity and Inclusion and the Gender + Equality Center will also be dedicated. Higgs Hyppolite said she hopes the events will begin the process of integrating the mission of her office into
the fabric of the university, and she is optimistic that the community will embrace the opportunity to avoid past issues. “It’s about all of us really taking ownership of it,” Higgs Hyppolite said. “There seems to be a willingness on
this campus, and people seem to want us to be better — for us to do it better, and for us to take care of each other in a better way.” Blake Douglas
bdoug99@ou.edu
CULTURE
Jan. 21-26, 2020 •
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VLAD ALFOROV/THE DAILY
Lazy Circles Brewing taproom Oct. 3, 2019.
Local brewery invests in town Lazy Circles aims to give back, share Norman interests VLAD ALFOROV @alfavlad
It started as a Sunday activity. Play pool, make beer, drink beer, eat pasta. Just a family thing. The building across the street from the Norman Fire Department was so small, it could barely fit a couple fire trucks. Now, the property welcomes its visitors with a timbered sign that reads Lazy Circles Brewing. Even before customers walk in, they may wonder whose idea it was to make a craft beer business of this size in this part of the country. “Let’s just say we didn’t sell any beer, and it was within the legal requirements set out by the ABLE commission,” said Stephen Swans on, Laz y Circles’ t a p ro o m m a n a g e r, re ferring to the Oklahoma Alcoholic Beverage Laws Enforcement Commission. Swanson gives brief answers until you touch upon topics close to his heart. “Bicycles were a passion for me long before I drank beer,” Swanson said. “I’ve always found freedom and joy in riding a bike.” Before bikes, there was cooking, Swanson said. After the college dropout’s
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At the time, Swanson was single, but shortly after accepting the job, he met his future wife, Holly. Her brother, Stephen Basey, was retiring after 20 years in the U.S. Navy. “The three of us decided it was a good time to build something for the future,” Swanson said. The rest of the family supported with money and otherwise. Swanson said he comes from a large family “with lots of brothers (who) all drink craft beer.” He also said one of his brothers b re w e d b e e r b e f o re h e “ever decided to try it out.” The future brewery started in Basey’s garage, Swanson said. “At the time, he had a bigg er hous e, a pool table and a pasta roller.” People started asking whether they could buy some beer for their backyard gathering, their wedding up in Tulsa, someone’s graduation party and other events. “We brew e d tog ether at home, for years before opening, starting off very small,” said Basey, head b re w e r a t L a z y C i rc l e s Brewing. “Then we were cranking out quite a bit of beer. And we got good at it.” “At first it was like, ‘Hey, let’s brew 10 gallons of beer. You get a keg and I get a keg,’” Swanson said. “And so, we got to a point where we could consistently keep
We brewed together at home, for years before opening, starting off very small. Then we were cranking out quite a bit of beer. And we got good at it. at Lazy Circles Brewing
first professional passion — becoming a famous chef — faded, Swanson went back to school. “I figured I would get a business degree and get a job that could afford what I wanted to do: ride bikes, travel, drink good beer and have a comfortable life,” Swanson said. That job at a bike shop offered all he wanted, so he dropped out of college again.
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-Stephen Basey, head brewer
two kegs of beer on tap, 10 gallons at a time in our house. From there, it kind of snowballs.” In November 2017, Basey and the Swansons thought, “Hey, maybe we can take this to market.” PERFECT TIMING At that time, there was only one brewery in Norman. It seemed like the
perfect time. The first brewer y in Norman was 405 Brewing. Swanson knew its owners, Trae Carson and Jonathan Stapleton, long before they opened. “We had a lot of help from Trae and Jonathan,” Swanson said. ”Actually, we get even more help from them now that we’re open.” One of the great things about the craft beer industry, according to Swanson, is breweries helping each other out. He said Lazy Circles and 405 Brewing try to market their businesses together and offer different products to avoid direct competition. “It’s a super friendly market,” Swanson said. “I could walk into any brewery in Norman or Oklahoma City and talk to somebody in their production facility, and they’d give me more information than I care to have. And then they’ll probably give me like two four-packs of beer. It’s just a really interesting industry.” The timing was also perfect because a year before Lazy Circles Brewing opened, breweries around the state could only sell their beer to distributors. But as Oklahoma became more craft beer-friendly, the legislature allowed for tap rooms to serve their own brew. Swanson said he believes the fun of craft beer is in the experience of going to a tap room. “ I t ’s i n o c c a s i o n a l l y meeting and talking to the owners, to the people who made the beer you drink,” Basey said as he looked around the wooden-pane l e d f ro n t ro o m o f t h e brewery. “There is nothing more A m e r i ca n t ha n a s ma l l business. Dudes or gals, following their passion, just working and making something they’re really into. What’s better than that, right?” Swanson and Basey recall how years back, in their garage, they would look at four chilling, fermenting kegs and ask each other, “A l l r i g h t , w h a t a re w e brewing next?” “It’s the same exact process now, except we are looking at probably 30 to 40 kegs,” Swanson said. “We probably need to get some kind of real business person involved to tell us how
to actually do it.” “It’s not that far off from where we started,” Basey said with a laugh. Neither of the two brothers-in-law would ever listen to any big business people telling them how to run their brewery. They managed to render their lifestyle profitable. “We’re not super unique in what we do,” Swanson and Basey said. Anywhere you go, you can now find a small neighb o r h o o d b re w e r y w i t h darkling stouts, staple IPAs and daring sour ales. But the beauty of it is in find-
talking to people when you’re there for a common experience,” Kuruc said. “It’s a great catalyst to start a conversation.” Currently, Lazy Circles Brewing consists of a laidback tap room that’s open every day and an actual brewery with tanks, mills and filters in the back. Additionally, the brewery hosts and endorses special events, including the Lazy Runners Brew Crew run — a joint initiative with OK Runner. A 3-mile race starts and ends at the brewery, with every finisher receiving a
the town. The brewery owners said they are “real big into raising money for certain charities.” They contributed to Food and Shelter as well as Bethesda, a Norman-based charity that provides care for those with childhood sexual abuse trauma. “If you’re just here to make money, then you’re just another giant corporation,” Swanson said. Eventually, Norman begins to resemble a single organism, where each building and business is an integral part of the whole. “There is certain expec-
VLAD ALFOROV/THE DAILY
Racers enjoy their complimentary after-run beer in front of Lazy Circles Brewing Oct. 3, 2019.
ing different takes on the complimentary beer. same beer in brewery after “We got a bunch of peobrewery, the brothers-in- ple here who like to run and law said. drink beer,” Swanson said. The Lazy Circles brewers STRONGER COMMUNITY, have not given up on their BETTER BUSINESS other passions as well, including biking. More than 20 spirited in“The idea was always to dividuals stretched outside be a brewery that was heavthe Lazy Circles’ inconspic- ily marketed toward cyuous two-story brick build- clists, runners, people who ing at the eastern end of kayak, go canoeing, hiking, Norman’s Main Street. The camping — that sort of liferally appeared surprisingly style we wanted to go after,” energetic for 6:30 p.m. on a Swanson said. “Because Thursday. that’s what we were into.” There were people of all O n We d n e s d a y s , t h e stripes: college kids, old- b r e w e r y c o l l a b o r a t e s sters, parents with children with Fusion Fitness and in jogging strollers. Buchanan Bicycles for a They were united by the “beer and bike ride.” two hobbies shared among Fusion Fitness and Lazy the crowd — running and Circles Brewing pair up for drinking beer. “stretch ‘n sip beer yoga” Kevin Kuruc, who joined sessions, too. the Thursday run, said he Such relationships bebelieves such events are tween local businesses “hugely helpful.” extend far beyond occaK u r u c h a s r e c e n t l y sional cooperation. The moved to Norman from No r ma n l e i s u re s c e n e, Austin to work as an assis- when explored more intant economics professor depth, presents itself with at OU. an all-embracing sense of “It’s much easier to start reciprocity that reigns over
tation for small business to be community-oriented,” Swanson said. However, he said at Lazy Circles they also believe in business serving a purpose beyond making money. “People ... support small business when they feel like that business is doing something more than just taking in profit.” Swanson said he thinks giving back to the community by helping local charities and investing in hobbies, such as sports or beer drinking, is the way to raise the overall quality of social and communal life. “If you like to drink good beer (and) you can support someone you know at the same time, that makes you feel better as a consumer,” Swanson said. “And as a business owner, it makes you feel better knowing that you can help give back to people who give to you.” Vlad Alforov
valforov@ou.edu
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CULTURE
• Jan. 21-26, 2020
Dancers to celebrate creativity Choreographers to use showcase as platform for voices JILLIAN TAYLOR @jilliantaylor_
OU School of Dance’s upcoming student showcase will celebrate young choreographers’ creativity and artistry Jan. 23–26. T h e Y o u n g Choreographers’ Showcase is a collaboration between OU choreographers, dancers and designers, featuring 10 unique pieces choreographed by OU School of Dance graduate and undergraduate students. The showcase provides participants with creative control during the production process. Choreographers were individually selected through a lengthy audition process facilitated by faculty coordinators Boyko Dossev, assistant professor of ballet, and Leslie Kraus, an assistant professor of modern dance, along with other faculty. From lighthearted dances to more serious pieces, the showcase is diverse in content. For modern dance performance junior Cameron Terry, having the opportunity to participate in the showcase is one of the reasons he came to OU. “My first passion is choreography, so when I transferred from the University of Texas last year, I wanted to set some work, be innovative and push the envelope,� Terry said. “I thought the Young Choreographers’ Showcase would be the best place for me to do that.� Terry has now choreographed for the showcase two years in a row and will be featured for his contemporary ballet inspired by p opular music from the 1970s, such as “The Payback� by James Brown. The impact of his work at OU’s School of Dance in such a short amount of time is inspiring and provides confirmation that choreography is his calling, Terry said. “It means a lot to represent OU through dance because we hold a lot of
weight in the art community,� Terry said. “Being a black male from Georgia, I feel like I can be a part of setting the tone for how we push the envelope here as I am forging my own path into the new decade.� The showcase is also an opportunity for students to use choreography to comment on the world around them. Ballet performance and multiple disciplinary studies fifth-year senior Carly Preskitt said when she decided to audition for the showcase, she wanted to create a piece that allowed her to express her voice as an artist. “I feel like a lot of times, as artists, we don’t really have a platform to express our voices or to be heard by others,� Preskitt said. “The Young Choreographers’ Showcase is definitely just
that, as it gives us a platform to express ourselves.� Preskitt’s piece is called “interitus,� which is the Latin word for ruin or destr uction. Alongside her student sound designer Alexandar Leasau and student visual artist Montserrat Ruffin, Preskitt created a piece about all of the ways humans destroy society and the environment. “My piece is a balance between the ability of humans to destroy things but also the ability for them to change and to make our world better,� Preskitt said. “I’m hoping audiences can take that message away and know that they too have a voice and the power to make a difference.� Unique messages like the one found in Preskitt’s dance make the showcase
s o re ma rk a b l e, D o s s e v said. The showcase provides choreographers with the opportunity to explore and convey their deepest thoughts and beliefs, all in the safety of the Elsie C. Brackett Theatre. “Here, there’s no critics from places like the N e w Yo r k T i m e s , t h e Washington Post or the Boston Globe that can either build or destroy your career,� Dossev said. “The s h ow c a s e i s a w o n d e rful opportunity, as choreographers can take risks and just go ahead and do everything.� As both dancers and choreographers, Dossev said, these students have been extremely vulnerable in sharing their choreography. In this way, Dossev has not only been able to teach his students, but he
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Ballet senior Justin Rainey choreographs a performance during the Young Choreographers’ Showcase rehearsal Jan. 13.
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Instructions: Fill in the grid so that every row, every column and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9. That means that no number is repeated in any row, column or box.
By Eugenia Last
Copyright 2015, Newspaper Enterprise Assn.
Make up your mind, set a course and don’t stray from your chosen path. This year will be a turning point in your life. It’s time to eliminate what is no longer of benefit and replace the unnecessary with what you need to reach your goal. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) -- if you put blood, sweat and tears into a worthy cause, you will meet someone who can benefit you in unexpected ways. Speak up to create a following. PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) -- Mistakes are likely to happen, and compromise will end up being necessary. Evaluate what’s going on instead of letting anger set in and cost you financially, emotionally or physically. ARIES (March 21-April 19) -Reevaluate personal relationships. You cannot keep doing things for everyone around you and neglecting what you need to do for yourself. Relax and recover. Choose love over conflict. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) -- Listen to someone with more experience. What you discover will help you move forward with your pursuits. A change is long overdue. Romance is on the rise. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) -- If you fight for your beliefs, you will persuade others to help. A sound idea will be recognized and put into play. A partnership will flourish if equality is maintained. CANCER (June 21-July 22) -- A change of heart or circumstance that someone makes shouldn’t leave you feeling uncertain. If you accept the inevitable, you’ll find a way to turn what appears to be a setback into a success.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) -- Think twice before you put fun before responsibilities. Uncertainty regarding how much money you have should be cleared up before you make an unnecessary purchase. Choose your words wisely and avoid backlash. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) -Keep outside influences at arm’s length. Reevaluate meaningful relationships and consider who or what is holding you back. If you are up-front and discuss what’s bothering you, an opportunity will arise. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) -- Stick to basics, be moderate and use your intelligence to win the support you need to get ahead. Don’t meddle; your time is best spent investing in your skills and future. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) -- Don’t be fooled by a hard-luck story. Stick to what’s important to you and what will inspire you to reach your objective. A stern attitude will result in added respect. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) -- Listen carefully, ask questions and refuse to let anyone manipulate you into taking part in something that isn’t in your best interest. Peace of mind will result if you take care of your responsibilities. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) -- Look at what’s possible and know enough to walk away from what isn’t going to benefit you. When in doubt, sit back and become a spectator.
has also allowed himself to be taught by them. “This process has most definitely been one of mutual learning,� Dossev said. “It’s a new beginning with each choreographer’s piece, reminding me of the innocence one has in each dance they create and all of the learning and relearning you do as you choreograph.� As the performance approaches, the young choreographers hope to emphasize the importance of dance, both as an art and an education. Terry is specifically hopeful this showcase will inspire other young dancers to pursue choreography. “When you pass down artwork, it’s not always about showing people the steps, but it’s giving them a legacy and an opportunity
to grow,� Terry said. “Dance is transcendent and should be about giving your essence and passing the torch to the next generation of young dancers.� T h e Y o u n g Choreographers’ Showcase opens at 8 p.m. Jan. 23 with additional performances at 8 p.m. Jan. 24–25 and at 3 p.m. Jan. 26 in the Elsie C. Brackett Theatre at 563 Elm Ave. Tickets range from $20 to $25 and are available online, by phone and at the OU Fine Arts Box Office. D i s c o u nt e d t i c k e t s a re available for students and faculty for $10. Jillian Taylor
jillian.g.taylor-2@ou.edu
Universal Crossword Edited by David Steinberg January 21, 2020
ACROSS 1 Floor cleaner 4 Broad neckwear 9 ASCAP alternative 12 ___ carte 13 Islamic law 15 Faux or fox coats 16 “Scram, truck driver!� 18 Book after Ezekiel, alphabetically 19 Sneaker brand 20 R.R. stop 21 2019 Gold Glove winner Anthony 23 Sections of a tall cake 25 Restroom door sign 27 It’s a wrap in Japan 29 Hanukkah item 31 Chooses 33 Gallery display 34 1545 council site 36 Aqua Velva competitor 37 “Scram, scoutmaster!� 40 “Roots,� e.g. 43 One-eyed “Futurama� toon 44 Stereotypically unsanitary animal 47 How a bandage should be
1/21
50 Ease, as tension 52 After expenses 53 Pie cuts, essentially 55 Fire remnant 56 Valentine sentiment 58 Alabamato-Ohio dir. 60 “One of ___� (Willa Cather novel) 61 Organ knob 62 “Scram, meteorologist!� 65 ___ in Boots 66 Zimbabwe’s capital 67 Schwab of tire fame 68 Appropriate 69 Less cooked 70 “Silent Spring� subject DOWN 1 Gandhi’s title 2 Laurence of “Othello� 3 Able to wait 4 Grate stuff 5 “___ the one!� 6 Did a cheerleading stunt 7 Home of Maine’s Black Bears 8 Aunt, to Frida Kahlo 9 “Scram, beekeeper!� 10 USA show about a hacker 11 “The Heart ___ Lonely Hunter�
14 Magazine space seller 15 Tasseled hat 17 Poi source 22 Abbr. on a bank statement 24 Mex. miss 26 One might visit for the holidays 28 401(k) alternative 30 Early cat carrier? 32 Ed.’s request 35 Scottish denial 37 Black gunk 38 ___ de la Cite 39 Green smoothie vegetable 40 You may be asked for its last four digits: Abbr. 41 Relished something
42 “Scram, maze creator!� 44 Assemble again 45 Kept from happening 46 Most brief 48 Nickname hidden in “clairvoyant� 49 Ha ha ha or hardy har har 51 “Don’t worry about me� 54 Prefix with “red� 57 Good economic periods 59 Bronte heroine Jane 61 Health resort 63 Viking ship propeller 64 ___ Lingus
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Beat It by Paul Coulter
SPORTS
Jan. 21-26, 2020 •
5
Nichols dominates in final year Senior gymnast expects greatness, sets team example MASON YOUNG @Mason_Young_0
Senior gymnast Maggie Nichols’ dominance has been well documented during her time at the University of Oklahoma, but her best may be yet to come. The 2018 and 2019 NCAA All-Around champion has gotten off to a fast start in 2020, nearly winning the all-around title in OU’s first contest of the season, then accomplishing the feat in the Sooners’ second meet. In Week 1, Nichols posted a stellar score of 39.625 while taking home the bars and floor titles in an Oklahoma victory over UCLA, Cal and Stanford, and she was later named Big 12 Gymnast of the Week for the period. Nichols would claim the same conference award again in Week 2 after improving her all around score to 39.750 while grabbing the beam, floor and vault titles in the Sooners’ win over Arizona State. Her Week 1 all-around score was the second-highest in the nation, while her Week 2 mark was the best in the NCAA. The key to her early season success: She’s finally healthy. After dealing with a foot injury during her junior
Senior Maggie Nichols celebrates her vault routine during the Sooners’ meet against Arkansas on Jan. 20.
season and coping with knee issues for most of her career, Nichols is probably in the best physical condition of her life, said OU head coach K.J. Kindler. “She came in with some injuries, and we have managed those over the course of her career,” Kindler said. “But I think that this is the healthiest and best she’s ever felt, and that shows.” With her feet and her
knees fully underneath her for the first time in a long time, it’s all about the work now for Nichols. “For me, I just go into the gym every single day with a goal in mind,” Nichols said. “And I strive for perfection in the gym, and I want to do that when I compete as well.” As a spry and joyful Nichols continues to improve, so do her teammates,
who are learning and growing thanks to her leadership. Freshman Ragan Smith, a young gymnast who is quickly coming into her own, cites her teammate’s helpfulness as one of her best character qualities. “I’ve been asking her lots of questions if I’m curious about something or how this goes or how the meet goes or how it runs,” Smith said. “And so she’s wound
up helping me on that side of it.” Junior Anastasia Webb competes alongside Nichols in OU’s all-around tandem, an experience she said has heavily influenced her work ethic and attitude. “She’s a great competitor and she carries herself really well, and I’ve learned to do the same,” Webb said. “I do look up to her and how confident she is and how she
PAXSON HAWS/THE DAILY
grabs the attention of the crowd, and I hope I do the same.” As of right now, Nicholas’ dominant performance and her leadership in the early phases of her final year are providing a driving force in what could be yet another championship season. Mason Young
mason.e.young-1@ou.edu
Sooners rebuild team with freshman class After loss of eight seniors, Sooners climb back to No. 1 JOE TOMLINSON @JosephT_OU
For the first time in six years, OU did not top the College Gymnastics Association preseason poll. They ranked second behind the team that beat them in the 2019 national championship: Stanford. The departure of eight seniors and two medical retirements in 2019 left big shoes to fill for the Oklahoma men’s gymnastics program. But after the Sooners’ win at the Rocky Mountain Open against N o. 5 N e b r a s k a , N o. 6 Minnesota, No. 13 Air Force and No. 17 Washington on Jan. 11, and a road victory at Ohio State on Jan. 18, they are back in the No. 1 spot. “Me and Tanner (Justus),
KATHRYN STACY/THE DAILY
Senior Grant Kell performs on pommel horse during the meet against Air Force and Arizona State University on Jan. 19, 2019.
we knew there was going to be big shoes to fill,” senior captain Grant Kell said Wednesday. To f i l l t h o s e s h o e s , Williams has brought in one of the biggest freshman classes ever during his tenure at Oklahoma with eight freshmen. Living
up to the high standards set by a highly decorated 2019 class of Sooner greats like Levi Anderson, Genki Suzuki and Yul Moldauer — 2019’s Nissen-Emery trophy winner, an award given to the year’s most outstanding gymnast — would not be easy. Anderson, Suzuki
and Moldauer combined for 28 All-American honors during their time in Norman from 2016 to 2019. But senior team captain Grant Kell believes he and Justus, a medically retired captain, can step up to the challenge and prepare the younger guys.
“(Tanner and I) knew we had to teach them what the culture’s about,” Kell said. “I try to set the tone every day and show these freshmen what they need to be doing and how to carr y themselves every day.” Leading that freshman class are Houston Cypress Academy of Gymnastics product Jack Freeman and Canadian junior Olympian David Sandro. Both took on the all-around in their first collegiate meet and victory last Saturday at the Rocky Mountain Open, where OU swept the all-around awards. In addition to Freeman and Sandro, freshman Josh Corona also participated in vault, while freshmen Alan Camillus and Branden Collier par ticipated on pommel horse. Five freshmen competed in Colorado Springs compared to just two seniors. Last year, just two freshmen competed at the Rocky Mountain Open compared
to eight seniors. “There’s a lot of potential,” junior Gage Dyer said. Dyer also said he believes some guys need to step into those leadership roles for this team to be successful. While the Sooners have recaptured the No. 1 spot in the College Gymnastics Association poll, they remain No. 2 in the coaches’ poll. “I think there are a few people that need to step in those shoes. Me, Alexei (Vernyi), especially Vitaliy (Guimaraes),” Dyer said. “I think that those spots Yul and Levi were in are opportunities for us to step up and be the leaders of this team.” The team will compete next at 7 p.m. CT Saturday against No. 2 Stanford and No. 12 Cal in the Stanford Open. Joe Tomlinson
Joseph.H.Tomlinson-1@ou.edu
OU football faces mass exodus on defense Players look to take talents elsewhere; team loses depth VIC REYNOLDS @vicareynolds
Since Oklahoma’s season ended in a 63-28 loss to No. 1 LSU in the Peach Bowl on Dec. 28, 2019, the Sooners have lost seven players to the NCAA transfer portal, six of them being defensive players. The Sooners didn’t lose much production statistically speaking to the transfer portal. Losing depth on a defense that is already having to replace its three best players — in defensive tackle Neville Gallimore, linebacker Kenneth Murray and cornerback Parnell Motley — is less than ideal. These are the seven Sooners who will take their talents elsewhere:
TY DEARMAN The first domino to fall for the S o oners was Ty DeArman, who transferred to SMU. The true freshman safety was initially committed to play at Arizona State, but he flipped to the Sooners on Dec. 19, 2018. His absence will likely not damage Oklahoma too much going forward, as he didn’t appear in any games during 2019, and the Sooners are already returning their two starting safeties in Pat Fields and Delarrin Turner-Yell.
with DeArman and the safeties, Oklahoma returns its two leading contributors at fullback in Jeremiah Hall and Brayden Willis. Without Tillman, the fullback production will still look largely the same in 2020. TROY JAMES
sophomore linebacker Ryan Jones. The former fourstar recruit appeared in 18 games over the last two years as a Sooner and tallied 29 total tackles and an interception. Jones signed with Oklahoma as a wide receiver initially, but he moved to safety and eventually linebacker. He registered four tackles in the Sooners’ season opener against Houston on Sept. 1, 2019, but failed to make much of an impact beyond that game. For the rest of the season, he only made five more tackles, with his last coming in a loss to Kansas State on Oct. 26, 2019.
Redshirt sophomore defensive tackle Troy James transferred to Prairie View A&M after playing primarily special teams for the Sooners during his time in Norman. James was a three-star recruit in the class of 2018, according to Rivals.com, and COBY TILLMAN he chose Oklahoma over The only offensive play- schools such as Indiana, er to leave Norman was Kansas and Arkansas. He LEVI DRAPER fullback Coby Tillman. played 14 games as a Sooner. T h e w a l k- o n l e f t f o r Sophomore linebackNortheastern Oklahoma RYAN JONES er Levi Draper entered the A&M on Jan. 4. He appeared portal on Jan. 16. Draper has The first legitimate con- participated in 28 games in three games in two years tributor to enter his name in his two years with the with the Sooners. Much like the situation in the portal was redshirt Sooners, primarily playing
on special teams. He recorded three tackles over the course of those games, all of which were in 2019. He was a former four-star recruit and was the second-ranked player in the state of Oklahoma coming out of the class of 2017. He made 143 tackles and four sacks in his senior year at Collinsville High School. MARK JACKSON JR. Redshirt senior linebacker Mark Jackson Jr. entered the portal on Jan. 17 after playing less time than expected in 2019. After starting the Sooners’ final eight contests in 2018, he was largely absent in Oklahoma’s new defense under Alex Grinch. The senior played in four games in 2019 and tallied one tackle. He played in 32 games total in his four years with the Sooners. Jackson was the third linebacker to enter the portal in two days.
JORDAN PARKER Redshirt junior cornerback Jordan Parker was the final Sooner to enter the portal, as he announced on Twitter he was transferring on Jan. 17. Parker had an up-anddown career in Norman, starting with his 2016 freshman campaign. He played in 10 games and started the Sooners’ final eight contests, showing lots of promise as a true freshman. He tore his ACL in the season opener in 2018 and has dealt with health problems since, causing him to struggle to return to consistent playing time. In 2019, Parker appeared in five games and recorded six total tackles. His final game came against West Virginia on Oct. 19, 2019. Vic Reynolds
victor.reynolds@ou.edu
6
SPORTS
• Jan. 21-26, 2020
Football, friendship, forever OU photographer reflects on more than senior season CAITLYN EPES @caitlynepes
Trigger warning: This story mentions suicide. I sat i n t h e c o r n e r o f the end zone waiting for the snap and pressed the Canon’s viewfinder into my cheek to block the tears streaming from my eyes. The 45,055 fans roaring at TCU’s Amon G. Carter Stadium were not enough to drown out my grief or make me feel less than completely alone. I grew up in Garland, Texas, about an hour away. I went to high school in Dallas and played softball all four years, making lifelong friendships at that school and on that team. Allie Burns is, was and always will be one of my favorite friends. But sometimes lifelong doesn’t last as long as we hope. That OU game against the Horned Frogs in 2018 came three days after I received a phone call telling me that Allie had died. I had planned to drive home from Norman on Friday morning, readying to shoot the game in my second season as a photographer for The Daily, but my emotions pressed me back to Texas two days early. After pulling into my family’s garage, falling into the arms of my father, all I wanted to do that weekend was cry. Instead, what I ended up doing was using muscle memory — much like Allie and I had used on the softball field where my dad helped coach us — to track the ball on each play, edit photos and publish galleries. I had a job to do, and while my body was on that field in Fort Worth, my mind was reeling to retrieve any memory of Allie. Photographing a football game is hard, especially on the road where I typically work alone on the sideline. But taking pictures amid grief, confusion and sadness was something I never i ma g i n e d d o i n g , mu c h less so near home, with my thoughts consumed by a person who meant so much to me. SHE WAS THE SUN I met Allie in 2012 during our freshman year of high school. My first memory of her is thinking she had ended up at the wrong tryout since she looked much more like a soccer star than a softball player. She was tiny, barely coming up to my chest, but you could hear her a
mile away. Soon, though, I understood her personality was radiant. She was so much more than a ray of sunshine. She was the sun. When I think of my high school friends, Allie is the most loyal. I don’t know one person who knew Allie who wouldn’t say the same. She was so much more than a teammate. She was a confidant, a fierce supporter and someone you could count on no matter what was happening in her life. Our old dugout is my favorite place to remember her. Anytime you looked through that fence, you could see her jumping and screaming for her teammates. Anytime she made a mistake on that field, she literally shook it off (it was more like a shimmy), then immediately refocused to make sure her team had the support it needed. Allie cared about people. She made me feel like I was the most important person in her life anytime we talked. We bonded over our love of softball, but our friendship became more than just teammates. When I explored my passion for photography, she was one of the first to cheer me on. As we got older, we talked about college and possible careers. Her love of sports and caring for people drew her to nursing and Texas Tech. My softball background and growing passion for sports photography drew me to OU. We graduated, made Big 12 jokes about our futures and promised to stay in touch. And while we didn’t talk as much as we used to in the months ahead, Allie always made a point to comment on my social media posts and text me whenever we were both back home. GROWING PAINS Sometimes, life — like adapting to college, becoming an adult or learning to hit the change-up — is a blur. Covering my first season of OU football as a sophomore was like that. I had photographed only one football game before that season but, fueled by my old competitiveness, I felt a lot of pressure to suddenly become the best. At The Daily, I had people around me to offer advice and support, but no one can really prepare you for your first road game alone, when all of your organization’s visuals rest on what you capture in that viewfinder. While I thought I was doing great when I shot OU-Baylor in Waco in 2017, I definitely needed help. I no longer had the bonds,
trust or unwavering support of that team I had in high school. In their absence, I at first didn’t ask for help and tried to figure it out alone. But soon, from conversations on the sidelines, in car rides and in the newsroom, I let go of the idea that I needed to know everything and accepted the help of others. Soon, I had created a new team here with The Daily and with my fellow photographers. Throughout my first season, I gained experience and, in time, confidence. Photographing OUTexas at the Cotton Bowl and the Big 12 Championship near my hometown made me feel like people could finally see what I was capable of. And that was before I and our team at The Daily flew to Pasadena, California, at the end of the 2017 season for the “Granddaddy of Them All.” When I walked onto the field at the Rose Bowl, I knew I wanted that feeling for the rest of my life. The grandeur, excitement and scale of it all inspired me to have the best game of that
happy. She couldn’t be gone, I thought. She was always there for me. And she, ever loyal, always would be. I was wrong. She was gone. Death by suicide at 21. After the TCU game, after the viewing, after the funeral, after the drive back to Norman, I tried to get back to normal. But normal, in some fashion, included Allie. My hands shook every time I tried to type or pick up a camera. I was lost, and it worsened when I realized my next big assignment was traveling to the place where she had died, Texas Tech, to photograph the Sooners’ next road game. I had never been to Lubbock. Driving into town, I didn’t know what I would feel. I got caught up in the whirlwind of pregame and getting set up in the photo room, so I didn’t feel the pain of holding back tears until kickoff. I tried to focus on the game and my job, but I was haunted by a memory I didn’t even have. Allie went to that school. Allie went to those games. Allie should have been at that one. Allie
Allie and me before our senior orientation in 2015.
season. Friends from high school thought it was so cool I got to spend New Year’s in Los Angeles, Allie included. We spent a couple of days the next summer helping out with softball camp back home, and we talked about how our lives had changed. She was so happy and excited to start nursing classes. She was so proud of the work I had been doing. I was so proud of her, ever selfless, finding her path to help others. It would be the last time I would ever see Allie alive. GRIEF TO GREATNESS It couldn’t be true. But it was. I learned that Allie had died while I walked to The Daily’s newsroom from the stadium parking garage on Oct. 17, 2018. She couldn’t be dead, I thought. She was so happ y. She made me
should have been with me there that night. Some of Allie’s friends and family wear a ring with an “A” on it now to honor her. Mine is on my shutter finger. I look at it and can feel her presence with every click of that button. At Texas Tech, I felt her more than ever. I was alone on that field, but I was still supported by her. After the game, looking out at the twinkling lights of a city I never knew, I softly wept thinking about the friend I had lost in the city she left behind. Driving away from Lubbock that night, the tears turned to sobs. It felt like I was leaving her there. While I had found my team and my people at OU, I felt guilty I never knew she hadn’t been able to do the same at Tech. It felt wrong to be there without her. Afterward, reflecting on the good and appreciating what I’d learned from the
bad, I found myself fidgeting with my “A” ring whenever I got nervous. Joyful moments felt different when I remembered who I couldn’t share them with. So last spring, when I was offered an NFL photo internship, the first people I thought to tell were my family and my friends. Standing in my apartment, I looked down at my hands and remembered the one person I wouldn’t be able to share the news with. I knew how proud she would be, though — just like back in the dugout, where she’d jump so high and unleash a scream that left all 4-foot-something of her physically unable to contain her excitement — if I could tell her. FLEETING, YET FOREVER I walked into the Walgreens off Main Street in Norman early in August of my senior year and bought a Kodak FunSaver single-use camera. After my summer internship in Los Angeles, heading into my last football season with The Daily, I reflected on everything that had gone into the past two years. I thought about how fleeting time is, and how our time can be cut short at any moment. I thought about Allie. The digital photographs I had been taking were not permanent enough. I needed something, anything, to help me feel like I had more, some, any control over the passing of time that made me feel older and further from my friend with every passing day. So with that little Kodak, I committed to taking at least one photo — on film, to be developed into 4-by-6 mementos — each game, so I could look back and hold a piece of history in my hands. I was stronger and more ready for this season, and I wanted to prove it. During the home opener, I felt closer to her than ever when I took photos from an airplane above Gaylord Family-Oklahoma Memorial Stadium. Nearly 2,500 feet above the 84,534 fans in attendance that day, I felt like she — the “Falcon” to my “Cap,” as w e tw o Marvel geeks called each other — was right there next to me. It was a special way to start my last season: doing something new and scary but still feeling supported by my team, Allie included. Still, as the season progressed, I continued to get ner vous when I photographed away games by myself. The pressure of being the only one there for my team and feeling like I still
had to prove myself was — is — a lot to handle. We went back to Baylor this season, where I first tried shooting an away game alone, and the work I produced this time was some of my best to date. But each time I stepped onto a college football field was, I knew, closer to my last time. There is a pressure and a sadness that comes with lasts. Every last since Allie’s death has been bittersweet, knowing that she can’t experience those moments with her team. I tried to soak in everything at my last home game, to really absorb, for the first time, just being there. I was so grateful, so passionate, so happy to simply be able to be on that field. The Peach Bowl was my season finale, and as the game came to a close, I reflected on my season and grabbed for the Canon and Kodak one last time. I pushed through my sadness once more to get my work done. I focused on capturing the players amid all their emotions. There wasn’t time for mine. There was, though, time to be brave. “Time and again ... it’s time to be brave.” That lyric was sent to me by my adviser the minute I got off the Cessna at Norman’s Max Westheimer Airport after taking pictures over the stadium during the first game this season. Looking back — at my time with Allie, my time at OU and my time of adapting to life without her — I have lived just that. She was brave. And she inspired me to be brave. I have learned that time is not always on your side. We need to use it wisely. To appreciate every little thing that comes your way. To invest in people like Allie did. To feel every emotion and not be afraid to let people see it. To document, however is right for you, and capture the moments you don’t want to forget. To hold on to the past and look toward the future. To be brave. Time and again. If you or someone you know is struggling with d e p re ss i o n o r re l at i o n ship abuse or is considering suicide, help is available 24/7 at the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255. Caitlyn Epes is The Daily’s visual editor. Caitlyn Epes
caitlynepes@ou.edu