Food carts, menswear and turning fast food healthy
Catholicism and tragedy in light of the Boston Marathon bombings
+LIFE&STYLE, page 5
+OPINION, page 4 University of Wisconsin-Madison
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City Council transitions to 2013-’15 session
Stadium Bar demolition plans pass By Meghan Chua The Daily Cardinal
Madison’s Common Council unanimously approved the demolition of Stadium Bar as well as a change to an alcohol policy ordinance at its meeting Tuesday. The council approved an adjustment to city zoning ordinances which will allow the demolition of the historic Stadium Sports Bar & Eatery, located at 1419 Monroe St., to make way for a new apartment complex. The Opus Group designed the six-story proposal, which would include 72 apartment units and retail space. Ald. Shiva Bidar-Sielaff, District 5, said the area could use more density and activity. “The Stadium Bar is certainly very active during football games … but outside of that most of the time it’s like a big parking lot that sits pretty empty,” Bidar-Sielaff said. “It’s going to be nice to see it have a
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Wednesday, April 17, 2013
grey satterfield/the daily cardinal
The new Common Council elected campus area alder, Ald. Scott Resnick, District 8, to president pro tem.
The emotional final gathering of the 2011-’13 Madison Common Council Tuesday included appreciative praise from the continuing alders to their retiring colleagues as well as a swearing in of the new alders and an election, which resulted in Ald. Scott Resnick, District 8, being appointed Council president pro tem. Among the alders saying their farewells was Langdon-area representative Bridget Maniaci, who said she is taking a temporary leave from city government to attend graduate school at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh, Pa. Ald. Ledell Zellers, District 2, took the oath of office to officially take over Maniaci’s former Council seat. The new Council elected Ald. Chris Schmidt, District 11, as president to act in place of Mayor Paul Soglin when he is out of town, as well as Resnick as president pro tem. Together Schmidt and Resnick will serve as a direct communication line between Soglin and the remaining 18 alders.
Anders Holm to speak at commencement Star of Comedy Central’s series “Workaholics” and University of WisconsinMadison alum Anders Holm will speak at the spring commencement ceremonies May 17, 18 and 19, according to a university release. Senior class officers selected Holm, who gradu-
Holm
ated from UW-Madison in 2003 with a major in history, to speak at commencement. Holm said during his time at the university he fostered his passion for writing and film while taking communications classes his junior year, according to a univer-
sity release. This passion led Holm to create his successful television show, “Workaholics,” with co-stars Adam DeVine and Blake Anderson. Senior class officers chose Holm as the commencement speaker because they wanted an alum who was similar in age to college students and could easily to relate to them, the release said.
Disability advocates address accessibility on campus By Sarah Olson The Daily Cardinal
The Associated Students of Madison hosted a panel discussion Tuesday with disability advocates who addressed issues facing University of WisconsinMadison students who are disabled as part of Diversity Week. ASM’s Diversity Week is an
event which showcases various types of diversity UW-Madison students embody, including diversity in physical abilities, which was the focus of Tuesday’s events. Disability advocates from the McBurney Center for Disabilities described their experiences living with a disability, including
how they have been accommodated at UW-Madison and how their disabilities have impacted their academic and social lives. Drew Hasley, whose central vision is extremely restricted, said he uses braille, live-streamed lecture slides and a screen that reads
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Deaf McBurney employee describes unique Deaf culture A McBurney Center representative discussed the culture surrounding deafness Tuesday as part of Associated Students of Madison’s Diversity Week. ASM’s Diversity Week is part of a campaign to raise awareness about student diversity, including diversity outside the context of race, at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. Tuesday’s events focused on diversity surrounding disabilities.
The speaker, Kate Skarda, addressed the audience in sign language about Deaf culture. She said through an interpreter that Deaf culture, with a capital D, is a distinct culture, and people within the Deaf community have unique educational, recreational and social experiences. Skarda also discounted common stereotypes, such as the belief that individuals who are hard of hearing can not drive or
do not enjoy music, as well as the belief that deafness is a disability rather than a barrier in the “hearing world.” UW-Madison junior Marie Greuel said she thinks the university should offer more opportunities for students to take classes in sign language and interpreting. “[Deafness] is ... another facet of diversity, and it should be acknowledged and praised,” Greuel said.
jane thompson/the daily cardinal
The 62-year-old employee was trapped under a loading dock lift while conducting repair work at the UW Art Lofts.
UW employee dies in lift accident A University of WisconsinMadison employee died Tuesday after being trapped under a loading dock lift at the university Art Lofts, according to the UW-Madison Police Department. The 62-year-old employee worked for the Physical Plant department of the university, and died after being transported to UW Hospital with serious injuries, according to UWPD Spokesperson Marc Lovicott. UWPD received the call at approximately 1:45 p.m. Lovicott said the employee was doing repair work on the lift and the machine came down
on top of him. UWPD is currently investigating the cause of the lift malfunction. The Madison Fire Department responded and lifted the machine off the employee. He was later rushed to UW Hospital where he died, according to Lovicott. The Dane County Medical Examiner will release the employee’s identity after notifying the family. The Art Lofts, the site of the tragedy, is located at 111 N. Frances Street and is the Art Department’s recently constructed facility that opened in May 2009.
“…the great state University of Wisconsin should ever encourage that continual and fearless sifting and winnowing by which alone the truth can be found.”
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An independent student newspaper, serving the University of Wisconsin-Madison community since 1892 Volume 122, Issue 122
edit@dailycardinal.com Managing Editor Alex DiTullio
News Team News Manager Taylor Harvey Campus Editor Sam Cusick College Editor Cheyenne Langkamp City Editor Melissa Howison State Editor Jack Casey Enterprise Editor Samy Moskol Associate News Editor Meghan Chua Features Editor Ben Siegel Opinion Editors David Ruiz • Nikki Stout Editorial Board Chair Matt Beaty Arts Editors Cameron Graff • Andy Holsteen Sports Editors Vince Huth • Matt Masterson Page Two Editors Rachel Schulze • Alex Tucker Life & Style Editor Rebecca Alt Photo Editors Grey Satterfield • Abigail Waldo Graphics Editors Angel Lee • Dylan Moriarty Multimedia Editors Dani Golub Science Editor Matthew Kleist Diversity Editor Aarushi Agni Copy Chiefs Brett Bachman • Molly Hayman Matthew Kleist • Rachel Wanat Copy Editors Ali Bartoli
Business and Advertising business@dailycardinal.com Business Manager Jacob Sattler Office Manager Emily Rosenbaum Advertising Managers Erin Aubrey • Dan Shanahan Account Executives Lyndsay Bloomfield • Alyssa Boczkicwicz Tessa Coan • Madi Fair Zachary Hanlon • Elissa Hersh Will Huberty • Jordan Laeyendecker Hannah Klein • Paulina Kovalo Danny Mahlum • Eric O’Neil Catherine Rashid • Ali Syverson Marketing Manager Caitlin Furin Copywriters Dustin Bui • Bob Sixsmith The Daily Cardinal is a nonprofit organization run by its staff members and elected editors. It receives no funds from the university. Operating revenue is generated from advertising and subscription sales. The Daily Cardinal is published weekdays and distributed at the University of WisconsinMadison and its surrounding community with a circulation of 10,000. Capital Newspapers, Inc. is the Cardinal’s printer. The Daily Cardinal is printed on recycled paper. The Cardinal is a member of the Associated Collegiate Press and the Wisconsin Newspaper Association. All copy, photographs and graphics appearing in The Daily Cardinal are the sole property of the Cardinal and may not be reproduced without written permission of the editor in chief. The Daily Cardinal accepts advertising representing a wide range of views. This acceptance does not imply agreement with the views expressed. The Cardinal reserves the right to reject advertisements judged offensive based on imagery, wording or both. Complaints: News and editorial complaints should be presented to the editor in chief. Business and advertising complaints should be presented to the business manager. Letters Policy: Letters must be word processed and must include contact information. No anonymous letters will be printed. All letters to the editor will be printed at the discretion of The Daily Cardinal. Letters may be sent to opinion@ dailycardinal.com.
Editorial Board Matt Beaty • Alex DiTullio Anna Duffin • Nick Fritz • Scott Girard David Ruiz • Nikki Stout l
Board of Directors Jenny Sereno, President Scott Girard • Alex DiTullio Emily Rosenbaum • John Surdyk Erin Aubrey • Dan Shanahan Jacob Sattler • Melissa Anderson Stephen DiTullio • Herman Baumann Don Miner • Chris Drosner Jason Stein • Nancy Sandy Tina Zavoral © 2013, The Daily Cardinal Media Corporation ISSN 0011-5398
For the record Corrections or clarifications? Call The Daily Cardinal office at 608-262-8000 or send an email to edit@dailycardinal.com.
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Adam s lawn has got it going on
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thursday: thunderstorms
adam wolf howlin’ mad
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ith warm(ish) temperatures arriving earlier this week, it feels like summer is near, or as I like to call it, the transition from bitching -about-the-cold to bitching-aboutsweating. Seriously, I could have four people fanning me like I’m Cleopatra and I’d still sweat walking the 10 minutes to class. I really wish sweat was a vestigial trait like wisdom teeth, or an appendix you could just opt out of or have surgically removed. I’d give my life savings to pay for that procedure.
Movie from your childhood that kicks ass “Honey, I Shrunk The Kids” (1989)—Before this film, never has swimming around in a bowl of Cheerios contained such palpable drama. I went through a phase as a kid where I got really into science fiction, reading “The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” and watching Urkel do all kinds of
zany experiments on “Family Matters,” so naturally this film was right in my wheelhouse. It made me want to go out there and invent all this cool shit until I realized there’s all this, you know, science involved. “You mean to tell me I have to figure out the terminal velocity of the square root of time divided by air temperature to create this flying car? HARDLY SEEMS WORTH IT.”
Small Victory that Salvages an otherwise shitty week Growing up without a summer job until I was 17, my parents often asked me to help with maintenance work outside the house and in my yard. I typically complied begrudgingly, cursing under my breath the whole time before one day recognizing the perks of manual labor. No, it’s not the fact that you’re outside in the sunshine being active; it’s that you’re visible to all the passers-by, looking like this rugged woodsman-type. I lived on a pretty busy street—by my rural hometown’s standards, anyway—and I would carry myself like the Brawny man, posing dramatically to wipe sweat off my
brow when cars would pass. I’d mow the lawn with my shirt off, certain all the teenage girls and soccer moms driving by would be impressed by my flabby abs. I’m sure it looked like a scene out of the “Stacy’s Mom” music video. That’s the sort of delusional thinking manual labor can lull you into, but it makes the work you’re doing a lot more glorified if you think people are watching.
First-World Hate of the week This week’s hate is reserved for CBS commentators’ incessant fawning over The Masters. The golf itself was quite excellent this year, but the unfailingly gushing statements about Augusta National (“Just another picturesque day at Augusta, gang!”)—not to mention completely glossing over the club’s history of racism and sexism—never ceases to be annoying. Watching The Masters is like watching a circlejerk between WASPs, with low-register piano music to offer you stilted melodrama throughout the production. If you needed more proof CBS
deserved a spot on the definitive list of ‘the whitest things ever,’ look no further than its coverage of The Masters. I’d slot CBS somewhere between unpaid internships and buying fair trade coffee.
Song that Never Fails to fire me up “Crazy Little Thing Called Love” (Queen, 1980)—With an arrangement that gives a nod to the late Elvis Presley, this rockabilly classic might not qualify as Queen’s best song, but it artfully demonstrates Freddie Mercury’s diversity as a vocalist. Mercury’s four-octave vocal range and unparalleled stage presence cemented him as one of the great frontmen of popular music, even though his horse teeth and creepy caterpillar mustache gave him the look of a molester more than a musician. He was also a hell of a quote. When describing himself as an artist in 1984, he famously told the interviewer, “I’m just a musical prostitute, my dear.” Indeed, Mr. Mercury, that’s a client list we’re all fortunate to be on. Tell Adam about your least favorite CBS reporters by emailing awolf3@wisc.edu.
Burn-outs to robots: advice Mom can trust michael voloshin voloshin’s commotion
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lright readers (mom and her co-workers who grin at her when she forces them to read my articles), I’ve decided to change my whole shtick of being a “comedic writer” and focus on something important: advice. As you all (all five of you, that is) know, I have given you advice on band names, gaining Twitter followers and how to oppose the communist agenda; but now it’s my full-time gig. Please send me your emails. Oh, here’s one: Dear Michael (thaaaaaaaaaat’s me!), I’m a former child star that is living my life, but everyone from TMZ to my own family thinks I’m spiraling out of control. What do I do to make people stop thinking I’m bananas? From, Drake’s Murdered Vagina. Oh, DMV, you’re doing great; from the pictures of your socks to your bleach-blonde hair and cheek piercings, to the fact you’re actually doing OK in this world, you’re fine. You know what, DMV? All those people—your friends and family— they’re all haters. They want what you have; what you have is a coke addiction and mental instability from a tortured life of going from audition to audition, gig to gig. You keep doing you, and hopefully one day you’ll end up like other successful child actors such as Lindsay Lohan, Macaulay Culkin and Dana Plato (deep reference). Keep on keeping on. (Sidenote: Amanda Bynes is 27...just saying.) Dear Michael, my friends make fun of me because all I listen to is
pop music. Is it really that bad I enjoy KISS-FM and all the music on it? From, Jimmy B. Oh Jimmy, you stupid child (I’m assuming you’re 14), yes. Being one of those people who says the only music he listens to is “whatever is on the radio” is one of the worst curses known to man. If you lived your life the way you found your music, you would only be watching NCIS, eating pizza and only using the word “the” in conversation. Being completely reliant on Billboard’s Top 100 is an unworthy cause and you should go out and look for some music, because honestly, it’s easier than ever. Dear Michael, is it weird to be sexually aroused by robots? From, Michael. Okay, I sent this one. As you all should know by now, Daft Punk are releasing their fourth studio album Random Access Memories May 21 and the buildup to it has been immense. Every little snippet of information about the album is making me wet with anticipation (gross analogy intended). So yes, I have my right to be in love with two French robots that have the funkiest electronic beats in the entire world, step off. Dear Michael, I’m a 13-yearold boy and I’m feeling weird changes down… there. Is it normal to grow hair everywhere? From, Maybe A Werewolf. Gross. Dear Michael, I want to get into stand-up but I can’t think of any good jokes, what should I do? From, Carlos Mencia. Carlos, just steal your jokes. Better yet, use this one I wrote in anthropology class last year and forgot about: “Premature ejaculation. Not
saying I have it, I just think it’s funny. If premature ejaculation happens within minutes, then what is mature ejaculation? 10-12 minutes, when the time is right? Or does mature ejaculation wear a monocle and a top hat and say, ‘Good morrow?’ I know I can’t write for commercials just because of penises. See, most commercials would say, ‘If you suffer from premature ejaculation, you should use this drug,’ I would say, ‘If you have suffer premature ejaculation, you should probably
feel bad about yourself and give up on life.’” Yeah… I’m kind of glad I gave up my dream the second I had it. Dear Michael, are these even real emails? From, Nobody. Well I goddamn just decided to do an advice column two minutes before I wrote it, stop judging me. Dear Michael, you are terrible. From, your readers (your mom). Harsh :( Do you have questions for Michael? Email them to mvoloshin@wisc.edu excellent advice.
news
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UW professor to Senate: student loans harmful University of Wisconsin-Madison associate professor Sara Goldrick-Rab testified in front of a group of United States senators Tuesday, saying higher education’s dependence on student loans is having a detrimental effect on college affordability and accessibility. Goldrick-Rab, a faculty member in the departments of sociology and educational policy studies, told committee members the increasing availability of student loans in recent years has allowed universities to expand prices and has led to a mirrored “de facto” increase in universities’ budgets. She said many public institutions are also in an “arms race” with private institutions, making the price of education synonymous with quality of education. Additionally, research shows annual family income has decreased, Goldrick-Rab said, while the net price of college has increased, putting it out of reach for most Americans. “There has never been a more important time to address the issue college
affordability,” Goldrick-Rab said to members of the Senate Committee on Health, Education and Labor Pensions. “College is now the main road to a stable, secure life.” Instead of loan dependence followed by large sums of debt, Goldrick-Rab argued in favor of a low-tuition model supplemented with federal programs, such as the Pell Grant, for need-based aid. “[Colleges] will adjust, they will have to adjust,” Goldrick-Rab said. “They [will] have to look at their own bottom lines.” She said students today are “just as responsible and ready to work.” However, she added asking students to both hold a job and take out loans has made college affordability impossible. Goldrick-Rab also advocated for additional financial aid resources for “non-traditional” students, such as older adult students and students at technical colleges, who have become the majority in recent years. —Cheyenne Langkamp
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“universal accessibility” into the building to make it more accessible for students who are disabled and students who are temporarily injured, as well as other individuals with specific needs, such as mothers with strollers. Hasley said students who are disabled could also benefit from more guidance on campus, particularly in academic buildings. He said it is difficult to navigate inside university buildings, and the university does not provide maps or guides. He recommended the university create a database describing each building’s room numbering system. Navigation concerns can also deter students who have disabilities from attending social events, according to Hasley. Rachel Huard, who is recovering from a traumatic brain injury, agreed with Hasley, describing how she struggled to find her way around campus when she first arrived, causing her to feel isolated. “I was out of sync with the rest of the university,” Huard said.
text to him. He said although the university is very flexible in accommodating people with disabilities, it needs to design courses and choose textbooks with accessibility in mind rather than responding to problems as they come up. “I think there is a lot of reactionary accommodation at a university this size,” Hasley said. He also said buildings should be designed with accessible entrances instead of adding separate accessible entrances later. One instance where the university is trying to address these concerns is in the Memorial Union renovation. Wendy von Below, the Memorial Union renovation project manager, said accessibility was a key component in the Memorial Union construction. She said they are trying to integrate
on campus
Definitely not slacking off
UW student Jordan Shepler shows off his slacklining skills on Library Mall Tuedsay afternoon. Slacklining is a practice in balance on a rope held taught between two anchor points. + Photo by Grey Satterfield
Social-media bill aimed at privacy State representatives circulated a bipartisan social-media bill this week that would restrict employers’, landlords’ and schools’ access to private social-media accounts during application processes. The bill, co-authored by state Reps. Melissa Sargent, D-Madison, and Garey Bies, R-Sister Bay, is designed to protect opportunities for job seekers, prospective students and tenants in the state by limiting access to their private information. The bill’s language extends to all internet accounts, including email and other forms of social media. Sargent said she wanted to make the bill applicable to all current and future social-media trends, citing MySpace and Facebook as examples. Currently, legislation does not definitively address what private account information employers can request. Sargent said it has become increasingly common for employers and universities to ask for
access to applicants’ social-media accounts. “I don’t think that [students] want to be discriminated against just because they won’t provide their username and password,” Sargent said. “Now not only will [the bill] protect the account holder, but it will also protect those who communicate with the account holder.” Sargent added that because she is not aware of any social-media discrimination cases, the bill would act more as a preventative measure and a way to keep pace with evolving technology. Still, she said the bill would not protect all online information. “One of the things that young people need to keep in mind and that this legislation will not prevent is that when you provide something [online] … it is accessible by the public,” Sargent said. “The bill will not say that people cannot go look at your account.” —Justin Williams
Vouchers could cost nine districts $9 million
courtney kessler/the daily cardinal
Disability advocate Drew Hasley said the university should consider students who have disabilities when planning courses and designing buildings.
stadium from page 1 more urban feel and be more active.” The Common Council also approved a change to an alcohol policy ordinance governing liquor licenses. Previously, if a property had its liquor license revoked, any subsequent owners of that property would have to wait 12 months after the original revocation to
apply for a liquor license. According to Ald. Mike Verveer, District 4, this law has prevented landlords from successfully renting out properties that have had licenses revoked. Under the amendment, tenants can apply under the standard process for a new liquor license regardless of the status of the previous tenant’s license. Verveer said changing the law is “the
Gov. Scott Walker’s plan to expand Wisconsin’s school voucher program could cost nine different school districts more than $1 million each in state aid, according to a new Legislative Fiscal Bureau report released Monday. The LFB’s analysis laid out several different scenarios in which approximately $8 million in state funding would be redistributed from the nine school districts to over 300 more if state lawmakers choose to enact Walker’s voucher expansion proposal. The proposal would expand private school vouchers, which give people another option other than attending failing public schools, to nine additional districts in the state. Madison’s school district, for example, would lose more than $800,000 in funding from the state government, which accounts for about 1.4 percent of its current state aid, according to right thing to do” to avoid blaming landlords for tenants’ actions. “The city will have more discretion to assure that we don’t feel handcuffed by this law,” he said. “It really gives us, frankly, more discretion and flexibility.” The issue came before city officials when Logan’s Madtown Bar suddenly closed after an audit revealed more than 50 percent of the bar’s profits came from
the report. In developing its report, the LFB assumed 110 public school students in each of the nine districts would instead enroll in private schools using a state voucher. Under Walker’s plan, districts with a total K-12 student body of at least 4,000 and two or more schools that the Department of Public Instruction rated as failing to meet state performance expectations in the same year would qualify for the voucher program. Walker’s proposal would also cap the program’s expansion at 500 students for the 2013-’14 school year and 1,000 students the following year. Walker announced the school voucher plan as part of his biennial budget proposal earlier this year. While most state Republicans support the expansion, several Republicans and all Democrats oppose the idea. —Adam Wollner alcohol sales, which violated the business’ liquor license. Because Logan’s license revocation is currently pending before the Alcohol License Review Committee, Verveer said the property will be governed by the new law. The Council also approved a new license to allow Chipotle Mexican Grill to sell liquor and beer at its 658 State St. location.
opinion What Catholicism teaches about tragedy 4
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tom jensen religion columnist In his first homily as the leader of the Roman Catholic Church, Pope Francis remarked, “When we do not profess Jesus Christ, we profess the worldliness of the devil, a demonic worldliness.” He wasn’t just talking about some abstract notion of the evil in humankind. He was referring to Satan, a recognized figure in Christian scriptures and a facet of theology since the beginning of the Catholic Church. Pope Paul VI remarked in a 1972 address, “The devil is the enemy number one, the source of all temptation… He is the sophistical perverter of man’s moral equipoise, the malicious seducer.” The church recognizes there is evil in the world. It attributes some of it to fallen human nature: to misguided, misinformed or downright malicious mortals. But it also attributes some evil to Satan, a spiritual and diabolical force who has it out for humans. If we look at Monday’s tragedy in Boston, we can see that yes, indeed, there is evil out there. This article is not intended to allege that the bombing was the direct
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work of Satan. Rather, I think we can learn a few lessons from Roman Catholic theology about the war between good and evil. One of the dangers of demonology is it is easy to become overwhelmed by the thought of a spiritual enemy who has you on his list. Since demons are held to exist outside the material realm, they seem frighteningly potent. It is easy to lose heart in the face of so great a foe. In the same way with tragedies, it is easy to get overwhelmed by the evil in today’s world. Like demons, it seems this kind of evil can occur anywhere and at any time. This may cause us to lose heart. But to return to a believer’s fear of demons, one thing must be considered. In a 1984 interview, Cardinal Ratzinger—now Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI—remarked, “The Christian knows that the person who fears God [respects and acknowledges God’s power] needs fear nothing and no one.” The battle Catholics believe in is not a balanced fight between good and evil. Satan is a very powerful force—he is the former second-in-command of Heaven, after all—and is a daunting
Support for opiate abusers is much-needed Mitch taylor opinion columnist With Wisconsin’s richest citizens barely making ends meet under the tyrannical fist of socialism, the Wisconsin Office of Justice Assistance had the gall to give Dane County an $80,000 grant to counsel and treat opiate addicts. Why, one may ask, should we take precious money that could be going to more important things like rich people and instead put it toward helping heroin addicts? Well it’s actually a good idea and, in fact, more efforts should be made to reach out and treat those suffering from drug addiction. If there is a way to end opiate addiction, it’s far off. Humans have been getting down with the get-down for thousands of years and we’re not going to stop soon. As a human, I can vouch for the fact we like to do what feels good, and the whole point of opiates is they feel good. It’s a given there will be addicts and abusers among Dane County’s population. While prevention is preferable, treatment is also an important and effective means of fighting opiate abuse. One thing to note about opiate abuse is most abusers start with prescription drugs and switch to heroin because it is cheaper and easier to get. I’ve written before on the futility of marijuana prohibition, and it would seem our heroin laws aren’t doing their job, either. Now, there are drugs one simply shouldn’t mess with and heroin is one of them, so I don’t mean to say we should legalize it. However, when heroin is cheaper and easier to get than legal opiates, something isn’t working properly. Another benefit of treating drug addicts is there’s less crime and jail time involved, which is beneficial for both the addicts and the state. Untreated heroin addicts tend to
steal things and be unproductive members of society. These behaviors cost taxpayers money to pay for welfare and incarceration. Treated addicts, however, are more likely to get jobs and not commit crimes. On a societal level, this is good because they cease to be a drain on society, they can turn their lives around and get a fresh start. With two-thirds of poisoning deaths attributed to opiate overdose, opiate abuse is a problem worth addressing. Counseling and treatment for addicts and abusers is a good way to help the willing solve their problems. All things considered, I think we can let the socialists get away with this one. Please send all feedback to opinion@dailycardinal.com.
foe indeed. But Satan is the creature of the Creator, and the Creator is the overall master of his creation. Free will prevents God from controlling Satan, but free will also prevents Satan from controlling humans. If humanity chooses to side with God, it can be a part of the winning team. In the meantime, there is a countering force to the diabolic one. As the story goes, only one-third of the angels fell and became demons, which leaves the good angels at a
super majority. Those who don’t believe in Christian theology still get to choose: Join or fight against evil. It will still exist, but if we join together on the side of good, we can endure, and we can win the day. This might seem too idealistic, but think about the way the world can work: Humans have the faculty to influence situations, even terrible ones. When faced with tragedies, we cannot forget there is a countering
good force out there, too, one we can help create no matter who or what you believe in. You most likely saw some shining lights amid the darkness Monday—people offering whatever help they could, which no doubt amounted to quite a lot. The evil we saw, and see daily, while daunting, nevertheless can foster great good. For this reason, we cannot lose heart in the darkness. Please send all feedback to opinion@dailycardinal.com.
life&style
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Spring eating: tasty bites, outdoor sights By Sydney Mann the daily cardinal
So, here we are again. Temperatures have finally climbed higher than 40 degrees, the sun is out and tables and chairs are back outside State Street’s beloved restaurants. During this past particularly frigid winter, going to get food was less about the best eating experience and more about finding the closest possible place to grab food so frozen noses and hands could be avoided. But it’s time to venture back outside and check out the best warm-weather eating experiences Madison has to offer. Located on Library Mall, the food carts are a Madison staple. Ranging from the all-natural Electric Earth to the dynamite Mediterranean food of Banzo, these carts have something for every type of eater. On a beautiful day, the area surrounding these carts becomes a social hub. With tons of seating and a central location, this is a great place to meet up with friends, especially the kind of friends who can never all agree on one type of food to get. Madison is known for its food carts, so make it a goal to try each and every one before graduation! A must-try is the harvest pita sandwich from Banzo. Make sure to pick up a side of their fresh homemade hummus to keep in the fridge!
Next stop is the outdoor haven behind Memorial Union—the terrace. Known for its colorful chairs and unmatchable view of Lake Mendota, this is the perfect place to kick back with a Twisted Tea and take in the sun. It is also a great place to study for second-semester finals, when the weather is so nice that the library just seems like a waste of a beautiful day. Before you get ready to sit outside, pop into Memorial Union, bring some of the classic pub food from Der Rathskeller to your seat by the water and get ready to relax. If a beautiful day inspires you to take a walk, then this final place is perfect for you. Located all the way down the magnificent lakeshore path, Picnic Point is a secluded spot overlooking Lake Mendota. Before departing on your journey, grab your favorite food—I recommend trying my favorite, the veggie burger with Swiss cheese and guacamole from Sunroom Café!— plenty of water and a blanket. Enjoy a walk down the tree-lined path, and stop to eat and rest at the picturesque end of the route. Make sure to take pictures, because the view out there truly is breathtaking. No matter how you do it, spring is the time to bring your eating experiences outside. Whether you like the hustle
Grey Satterfield/the daily cardinal
The food carts on Library Mall are a must-try for UW students before graduation. and bustle of the city or somewhere a bit more off-the-beaten-path, Madison has a place for you. Break out your shorts and flip-flops, put on your sunglasses and enjoy the sun, because when warmth finally arrives in Madison, it’s
essential to soak up every minute of it. Have some great outdoor eating spots you’d like to share with Sydney? Email her your favorite picks at smmann@wisc.edu and grab a bite to eat—once the sunshine peaks through.
Madison menswear offers looks from trendy to traditional By Kelsey Eichman The Daily Cardinal
When thinking of Madison, one is more likely to imagine camouflage as being the “trending fabric” rather than a beautiful silk or leather—let’s face it, this isn’t Paris. However, that doesn’t mean Madison is devoid of style. Rather, it is a diamond in the rough. Madison has a unique, urban style and several boutiques that reflect the widerange of Madison habitants. In fact, I discovered several menswear boutiques that each have a distinctive voice and offer the services necessary to keep Madison men stylish and up-to-date.
For the Madison trendsetter
Context is the ultimate boutique to find unique and interesting pieces. Inside you will find a relaxed and cool environment. The store is well-decorated with vintage memorabilia, and a blend of old and new gives the store its distinct style; there is an iPad hooked up to an old record player, and vintage military jackets are paired with uniquely printed
button-downs. Although it’s a bit pricey—expect to spend over $150 on a button-down and over $50 for a T-shirt—the pieces are so unique you will ooze style. GQ, in reference to Context, even said, “The dudes who help dictate what the blogs will be buzzing about this month live in Wisconsin.” But beware, Context is not for the style-shy. Located near the capitol, it is definitely worth a visit for those hoping to find the next “wowing” piece for their wardrobe.
For the style-conscious guy
Located on State Street is Jazzman. Jazzman is more in-tune with what most men wear, keeping a more “traditional” feel, but simultaneously offers pieces that are in-line with trends and can give a nice boost of style. They offer quality button-downs in a variety of colors and more traditional prints that are well-priced at around $80. If you’re looking for jeans, this is the place to go. Their selection of Mavi, 7 For
Healthy eating at your local greasy spoon McDonald’s:
Healthy Breakfast: Fruit ‘N yogurt parfait (150 calories), or the next best option is the Egg McMuffin (300 calories). Healthy Lunch: Plain hamburger (250 calories) or four-piece Chicken McNuggets with sweet ‘n’ sour sauce (220 calories). Healthy Snack: Instead of opting for the fries or the McFlurry, if you’re craving a snack grab a plain vanilla cone (170 calories).
KFC:
Healthy Lunch: Kentucky grilled chicken, whole wing (80 calories) or chicken little sandwich without sauce (210 calories). Healthy Side/Dessert: Corn on the cob (70 calories) or a sweet life oatmeal raisin cookie (150 calories).
Taco Bell:
Healthy Breakfast: Sausage a.m. griller (240 calories). Healthy Lunch: Fresco chicken soft taco (150 calories) or a cheese roll-up (190 calories). Healthy Side/Dessert: Black beans (80) or cinnamon twists (170 calories) .
Five Guys:
AVOID AT ALL COSTS! It is extremely
hard to find a healthy or low-calorie dish. Healthiest Option: Bunless, little hamburger (220 calories).
Pizza Hut:
Healthy Appetizer: Two traditional naked wings (90 calories) or two baked hot/mild wings (110 calories)—don’t use any sauce! Healthy Lunch: One slice of veggie lover’s hand-tossed, 12-inch pizza (220 calories). Healthy Snack/Dessert: Two cinnamon sticks (160 calories).
Wendy’s:
Healthy Breakfast: Steel cut oatmeal with summer berries (150 calories). Healthy Lunch: Junior hamburger (250 calories) or half-size apple pecan chicken salad with fat-free French dressing (210 calories). Healthy Snack/Dessert: Skip the sides and go for a junior vanilla frosty (170 calories).
Dunkin’ Donuts:
Healthy Breakfast: Egg white veggie wake-up wrap (150 calories). Healthy Lunch: Tuna salad sandwich on an English muffin (390 calories). Healthy Donut: Two cocoa-glazed munchkins (70 calories).
All Mankind, Citizens of Humanity and JOE’s ensure you will find the right brand, cut, fit and style. Jazzman is a good place to go whether you’re looking for staple pieces or an entire outfit. They can dress you from head to toe, down to the itty-bitty accessories like wallets and pocket squares. They offer pieces for every occasion, from dress pants and dress shoes to brightly colored chinos and sneakers. This is the fashion destination to go for guys who want a polished, classic look without raising any eyebrows from pedestrians.
For the gentleman
At first glance, Moda Italy looks pricey. However, the vast array of suits on display cost significantly less than one might expect. They mostly carry Enzo and Mantoni suits, and offer warehouse prices that keep your wallet happy while you look like a million bucks. One can find a suit, dress shirt, tie and belt for under $300. They offer a range
of styles from the more traditional suit to the “pushing-the-envelope” printed jacket. The helpful staff will ensure you find the right suit, even down to the little accessories— they have a nice selection of unique bow ties, ties and pocket squares—and will take care of your tailoring needs. If you’re in need of assistance suiting up to nail that interview, Moda Italy should be your first destination. No matter what your flavor, these three shops will tailor to any Madisonian’s style. Next time you’re in need of a new pair of pants or get the urge to redo your wardrobe, pay one (or all) of these boutiques a visit. You’ll look and feel sleek and stylish as you stroll to class, and unlike when you shop at Urban Outfitters, you’re less likely to see 15 other guys sporting the same button down! Want more tips on how to stay hip and trendy this spring and into summer? Email Kelsey at eichman2@wisc.edu and she’ll let you in on more unique shops and styles for Madison’s fellas.
Turn grease into a healthy feast By Jordyn Silverstein The daily cardinal
Who hasn’t walked into a McDonald’s and ordered a double quarter pounder with cheese and a side of large fries only to regret it 20 minutes later? We all crave fast food once in a while, but it doesn’t always have to be unhealthy. Bikini season is upon us, so next time you’re craving some fast food look here to avoid gaining extra, unwanted pounds. When you walk into a fast-food restaurant and smell the fries, try to imagine the nauseating food coma that will come within the hour. Succumbing to the craving for a greasy burger or an enormous burrito will most likely turn a productive day into one spent lying on the couch. So before you put the ketchup-doused chicken nugget into your mouth, think about what you want to do with the rest of your afternoon. The key to ordering fast food is moderation. Obviously when you enter any fast-food restaurant, whether it be Five Guys, Burger King or Pizza Hut,
it is near impossible to avoid getting one unhealthy item, so decide what you want most. Is it fries or a shake? Make the conscious decision to allow yourself the side of fries once in a while, but make the rest of your meal healthy. While making a balanced meal at McDonald’s may appear as difficult as climbing Mount Everest, remember there are choices you can make that are healthier than others. As you open your mouth to order one meal that consists of an entire day’s worth of fat and calories, think about the following options to avoid committing fast-food suicide. It really is possible to find something healthy everywhere! So next time you’re at a fast-food restaurant and decide to give up on your diet, think twice and make a healthy choice. Need more tips on how to stick to your diet in the face of deep fryers? Email Jordyn at jasilverstei@wisc.edu, and perhaps you two can explore more fastfood restaurants to discover the semihealthy menu items—and which ones to slap a warning label on!
arts l
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Wednesday, April 17, 2013
dailycardinal.com
Floating in the froth with ‘roman a clefs’ Sean Reichard quip quo pro
“A
River Runs Through It.” “On the Road.” “All Quiet on the Western Front.” “The Bell Jar.” “Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.” What do these books have in common, you might ask? Well, for one, they’re all rooted in autobiography, and their official title is roman a clefs (“novels with keys” in French). What distinguishes a roman a clef? Curiously, it requires a great deal of fidelity to its subjects. It is not merely based on autobiography. It is autobiography, in a sense, since the experiences of the author are so integral to the story. Sure, names are changed and the banner of fiction is draped over its mantle, but there’s no denying the source material. It can be a roman a clef even when the experiences aren’t quite so real. Take “Tender is the Night” by F. Scott Fitzgerald. The main characters, Dick and Nicole Diver, are based off a couple Fitzgerald knew, Sara and Gerald Murphy. But he used a lot of material from
his own life—especially Zelda Fitzgerald’s increasingly apparent schizophrenia—and mapped it onto the Murphys, or rather he took the Murphys and used them as masks to pantomime his own domestic struggles and conception of inadequacy and squandered talent. Don’t get me wrong, “Tender is the Night” is a fantastic book, but the effect it creates is disquieting if you know the context. And with a roman a clef, you do know the context. The context is key. You question the whole experience. Ernest Hemingway, who wrote several roman a clefs himself, including “The Sun Also Rises,” questioned the practice and told Fitzgerald so in a pretty striking letter: “Goddamn it you took liberties with peoples’ pasts and futures that produced not people but damned marvelously faked case histories. You, who can write better than anybody can, who are so lousy with talent that you have to— the hell with it. Scott for gods [sic] sake write and write truly no matter who or what it hurts but do not make these silly compromises.” Silly compromise or not, “Tender is the Night” raises questions of authenticity in literature, that perennial bogeyman of the arts. Because it is a great book, but
it’s not necessarily true, is it the elements of truth or the fabrications that make it great? Roman a clefs hinge on the experiences of the writer in order to be made. Without those experiences, it is no longer a roman a clef. It may just be a novel now. But is it “just” a novel? Part of the romanticisation of roman a clefs—or, in a more cynical light, the fetishization—is the fact they happened, more or less, especially in American literature. We like it when things happen. Happening, happening, all day long. We like it when writers write about their lives, because it lives up to the image of the writer being an interesting person. We like it especially when their lives are grim and dark and full of misfortune, because we can empathize—really, we can—and get all our accounts of ulcers and cirrhosis and mutilation without leaving our homes. To paraphrase a line in Chapter 16 of “Ulysses,” those writers are sailing the sea and they have taken the onus of doing so because it’s too hard for normal folks. But this sets up a troubling paradigm. If the best and truest books are written out of experience, then if you’re not experiencing something worth writing about, you’re
Graphic by Dylan MOriarty
squandering your talent or your life. In addition, it propagates a myth that implies if you’re experiencing such interesting and relevant things, you can automatically write about them. It also sets up the trap wherein if what you’re writing isn’t true within the scope of experience, it is somehow less valuable than writing that correlates approximately to life. Great writing can be born out of experience, but it can also be born out of living; living that takes you outside yourself and into the world, through it, through people and buildings and weather and
ages. To paraphrase a line from Chapter 9 of “Ulysses” (the great life-tome), you walk through these things and more, but you’re always coming back to yourself. You can bring back experience, in whatever quantity, but to make use of it is a different question entirely. Life, on the other hand, is the current you immerse yourself in, and it can take you to gulfs and horizons you were hitherto unaware. So get swimming. Lose the clef to your roman? Shoot Sean an email at sreichard@wisc.edu and ask if he’s seen it.
Thee Oh Sees burst out of their ‘coffin’ on latest album CD REVIEW
Floating Coffin Thee Oh Sees By Natalie Amend The Daily Cardinal
WOO. BAH BAH BAH BAH. HA HA HA HA. These are the sounds of Thee Oh Sees, interjections yelled in nearly all their songs. Loud. Expressive. Joyous. The cover of Thee Oh Sees’ latest album, Floating Coffin, is the perfect representation of this sound. It displays bright red strawberries filtered over repeated pairs of menacing eyes. With every song
by Thee Oh Sees, expect this kind of sweetness over spookiness. Expect catchy choruses about bloody children hidden under a guise of bright, psychedelic guitars. Hailing from the same San Francisco garage rock scene as Ty Segall and Sic Alps, a fun but tired and homogenous scene, Thee Oh Sees are a band defined by pure prolificacy. Floating Coffin is their seventh record in five years(!). Their last album, Putrifiers II, released eight months ago(!!), saw them at their most fine-tuned, with carefully crafted—albeit slightly forced—garage pop tunes and old west influenced psych jams. Floating Coffin is the same band, just a bit looser and a lot more stimulated. And that’s what makes this a great album. It’s a band, obviously concerned with putting out music as much as possible, that’s loosening up and playing what’s
natural to them. It’s also a darker version of this band. Some of these songs are straight-up brooding, an emotion that’s not normally associated with their brand of effervescent hippie-influenced mania. It’s a subtle-yet-noteworthy change, and it’s really exciting to know Thee Oh Sees are still evolving after a seemingly exhausting output of music. “Toe Cutter - Thumb Buster” is the catchiest and most typically Thee Oh Sees song on here; a psych-punk slacker jam for the dude bros of 2013. It’s the sound of T. Rex and Butthole Surfers partying together, with drums bashing, loud guitars bending and soft vocals soaring to wherever they feel like, man. “No Spell” is another stunner. It’s a beautiful blend of acid-charged garage punk and krautrock. It’s initially soft, with a droning bass line and gentle
melody sung in duet falsetto by guitarist John Dwyer and keyboardist Brigid Dawson and a simmering drum beat. By the end, the softness is broken by a “WOO!,” the music quickens and thrashing guitars take over. It shows even the calmest songs can be infiltrated with frenzy. “Night Crawler” is the highlight of the album. If Thee Oh Sees has a sound, this is the furthest they’ve ever diverged from it. A stunning stomper of sludgy and spacey electronics, it’s both the creepiest and sexiest song they’ve ever made. The song is literally alien. It sounds like it’s transmitted from a spaceship, the vocals filtered through a hazy cosmic megaphone. The demented, flute-driven “Tunnel Time” transitions beautifully into “Minotaur,” the closing track. “Minotaur” begins with a
few slow notes from a cello and transforms into a trippy ballad, evocative of Phil Spector’s wallof-sound girl groups and Roy Orbison’s proto-dream pop crooning. Like “Night Crawler,” it’s a different breed of Thee Oh Sees, still connected to their manic sound but drifting into new territory. While Floating Coffin isn’t Thee Oh Sees’ masterpiece (see, arguably: Carrion Crawler/The Dream ), it’s a great addition to their already-massive discography. It’s hardly an innovation, but it shows Thee Oh Sees going in some really cool, weird and continuously joyous directions. Floating Coffin is both a perfect representation of their sound, madness hidden beneath delirium, and at the same time an entirely new blueprint of it. Rating: B
Well, I mean, I probably still won’t be adapting it into my vernacular.. Sucking the Monkey means stealing liquor from a ship’s ration.
comics dailycardinal.com
Being named Steve
Today’s Sudoku
Wednesday, April 17, 2013 • 7
Eatin’ Cake
Classic
By Dylan Moriarty www.EatinCake.com
© Puzzles by Pappocom
Caved In
By Nick Kryshak nkryshak@wisc.edu
Solution, tips and computer program available at www.sudoku.com.
Fill in the grid so that every row, every column and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9.
THE DAILY CARDINAL
First In Twenty By Angel Lee alee23@wisc.edu
Like a pile of informative kittens. Today’s Crossword Puzzle
The Produce Aisle
Evil Bird Classic Answer key available at www.dailycardinal.com CROSSING DEM WORDS ACROSS 1 Much-used pencil 5 Defunct hoops org. with a red, white and blue ball 8 A, as in Athens 13 Graceful sea eagle 14 Singer Anthony 16 No longer covers 17 Human shark’s offering 18 Island near Corsica 19 Tropical vine 20 Case for Columbo 23 It’s pressed for cash 24 Maxima maker 25 Parched 28 Former nuclear agcy. 29 U.S. intelligence org. 31 Soak a fiber 32 Feel longing for 35 “Peek-___, I see you!” 38 Part of “FWIW” 40 “Indiana Jones” genre 43 Auburn heads? 44 Bookbinding leather 45 Borodin’s prince 46 Lass 47 Admiral’s org. 49 ___ Alamitos, Calif. 51 Farrow and Gardner, to Sinatra 53 Biblical promised land 56 Hunk’s or babe’s
9 5 62 64 65 6 6 67 68 69 70 71
asset “The Producers,” e.g. Make quake 10 percent of DXXX Soprano’s showstopper Chewed up Flush Disgusting buildup Danger signal Chang’s closest kin Traditional Easter buys
DOWN 1 1965 Freedom March city 2 Rainbow or speckled fish 3 Turn swords into plowshares, e.g. 4 Reach for your toes 5 Statesman? 6 Healing ointments 7 Roast beef chain 8 Having the means 9 Pumas’ pads 10 Kneeling spot 11 She may feel cooped up 12 “Solid ___ rock” (Ashford & Simpson lyric) 15 Legendary lover 21 67.5 deg. on the compass 22 Thousands of lbs. 26 Active start?
7 2 28 30 32 33 4 3 36 37 39 1 4 42 48 50 52 54 5 5 56 7 5 58 60 61 62
63
Anesthesia of old Z ___ zebra Barley bristle Madonna, to the Brits Mountain climber’s tool No-win situation Nautical hanger-on “Deep Space Nine” changeling “The Andy Griffith Show” character Buckeyes’ sch. Intertwining ___-fi (genre) Yoko from Tokyo With fewer reservations Without worldly sophistication Little green man Coiner of “It ain’t over till it’s over” Abhorrence Groups of two Dispatched Jet speed “Under the ___” (“The Little Mermaid” song) First name among Baltimore sports legends
By Jacob Densow densow@wisc.edu
By Caitlin Kirihara graphics@dailycardinal.com
Sports
wednesday april 17, 2013 DailyCardinal.com
Boston Marathon aftermath puts sports ‘heroes’ into perspective
Softball
vince huth huth the truth
T
grey satterfield/the daily cardinal
Junior pitcher Cassandra Darrah led the Badgers to a gametwo win over Green Bay Tuesday, allowing just four hits.
Badgers split opening home series against Green Bay By Sam Garigliano the daily cardinal
The University of Wisconsin softball team split its two-game home opener against Green Bay (2-6 Horizon League, 10-19 overall) Tuesday, losing the first game 2-1 and winning the second 4-3. In the first game, Wisconsin (7-5 Big Ten, 30-9 overall) scored right away in the first inning when senior first baseman Shannel Blackshear drove in senior second baseman Whitney Massey for a run. Green Bay answered immediately in the second, however, tying the score at one. The Badgers kept the score even at one apiece through six innings before Green Bay scored in the seventh off an error by Wisconsin. While senior pitcher Meghan McIntosh allowed only four hits and one walk, Phoenix senior pitcher Allison Goecks allowed three hits and four walks. Although McIntosh’s start looked better on the stat sheet, Goecks came out of the game victorious. In the second game of the doubleheader, Green Bay appeared to pick up right where it left off scoring three runs against junior pitcher Cassandra Darrah in the first inning. But this game would not end like the first. The Badgers answered right away in the second inning when junior outfielder Mary Massei hit a double into right field, adding a run
to the scoreboard. Wisconsin earned another run in the next inning off a sacrifice fly by junior infielder Michelle Mueller. The Badgers kept their bats hot the whole game, recording a large number of hits, but had a hard time adding runs to the scoreboard until late in the contest. The score would not change until the sixth inning, when Massey blasted a tworun home run to score junior infielder Stephanie Peace. Darrah managed to close out the game quickly without any challenge from Green Bay’s offense. She ended the game in the top of the seventh inning with four hits, six strikeouts and only one walk. Wisconsin’s bats were clearly the impressive part of the second game, and Green Bay’s stat line shows it: Phoenix sophomore pitcher Lauren Danner allowed 13 hits and walked two while Green Bay committed four errors. Senior outfielder Kendall Grimm went 3-for-3 on the night with one run. Massey, Peace, Blackshear and Massei each had two hits. The Badgers will continue their home stand through April 24. Wisconsin takes on Ohio State in a three-game series starting Friday at 6 p.m. at Goodman Diamond. Wisconsin also plays Northwestern in a doubleheader next Wednesday.
he Masters’ final round is, in my opinion, the pizza of sporting events. You won’t regret the decision to park yourself on the couch for six hours, because Sunday at Augusta will always leave you with some sense of satisfaction. Plenty of final rounds simply won’t compare to Tiger’s first career major championship at the 1997 Masters or Bubba’s playoff-win at Augusta last season. But by the same token, no pie will compare to Stuc’s Pizza in Appleton. I’ve come to believe the Masters’ final round will always give us a phenomenal finish, a compelling storyline or something in between. This Sunday was no different, with Adam Scott capturing his first major championship just nine months after completely shitting the bed down the stretch at the British Open Championship at Lytham St. Annes. Sure, Woods’ after-the-fact, two-stroke penalty fiasco was a lingering fart on an otherwise great Masters, whether you think he should have withdrawn or not been penalized in the first place. Nonetheless, Sunday at The Masters was once again must-watch TV.
However, no matter how much competition, drama or controversy we saw during The Masters, none will be a topic of discussion this week. The storylines across media outlets, let alone the sports variety, will obviously focus on the tragedy in Boston Monday. I won’t go into length about the selfless acts of runners, bystanders and medical personnel, as my co-editor and award-winning sports columnist Matt Masterson already did so much better than I could hope in his column Tuesday.
“These efforts were nothing short of heroic, and any accomplishment in the sports arena will pale in comparison.” However, I do think it is important to highlight the heroes from Monday’s misfortune and put them in perspective with sports “heroes.” Regardless of whether you’re a sports fan or not, you’ve probably heard “hero,” “warrior,” “battle” or some other combatrelated word to describe an athlete or team’s performance. His walk-off pinch hit was a heroic effort … These guys strap up and go to battle night-in and night-out … He played on a bum ankle and still scored 35 points— that guy was a warrior tonight. I won’t sit here and pretend I’ve never uttered something along these lines, because I
have. Further, I certainly don’t understand as well as others how offensive it can be to talk about athletes as though they’re military figures. Excluding my grandpas, none of my family or especially close friends have served in the armed forces. Although I can’t claim to have the same understanding as those who have served, I know it’s lazy as balls to call an athlete a warrior because of a great performance in the face of adversity. Similarly, it isn’t appropriate to deem clutch play heroic, because athletes’ on-the-field obstacles will never require a heroic effort to be hurdled. My stance on this issue was enhanced Monday when Boston Marathon participants raced to hospitals to donate blood shortly after running 26.2 miles, bystanders rushed to uncover railings that had fallen on those in the near vicinity of the aftermath and the police jumped into the middle of the rubble to protect and serve. These efforts were nothing short of heroic, and any accomplishment in the sports arena, no matter how “heroic,” will pale in comparison. Does it bother you when athletes are referred to as ‘warriors’ or when their performances are declared ‘heroic’? What did you think of this year’s edition of The Masters? Let Vince know what you think by shooting him an email at sports@dailycardinal.com.