Weekend, May 4-6, 2012 - The Daily Cardinal

So you want to be an Existentialist?

Fake News Friday The Mifflin prophecy is revealed, a student earns a degree in marine cows and more!

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Weekend, May 4-6, 2012

Police concerned with theft in warm weather

grey satterfield/the daily cardinal

About 15 students gathered around a table at der Rathskeller to hear Milwaukee Mayor Tom Barrett talk about his campaign and his strategy against Gov. Scott Walker.

Given the trend of burglaries increasing at the end of the academic year, police in Madison’s southern district are reaching out to residents in student-heavy areas, telling them to take extra precautions against theft.

While the number of burglaries happening now is low, South District Captain of Police Joe Balles said students should remain vigilant as the weather warms up and finals begin.

Robberies spiked with the heat in March, to as many as six within a couple days, according to Balles, and the end of the semester also triggers more burglary attempts.

“When finals start,” Balles said, “[burglars] are just… watching for [students] to move out.”

Though burglaries were down from 2010 to 2011 in the south district, which includes student neighborhoods south of Regent

Street, they became concentrated more heavily near Orchard and Mound Streets. According to Balles, this a result of criminals preying on vulnerable students, who he said are “easy pickings” to robbers.

Most thefts are nonviolent and happen during the day, according to police. Burglars often ring the doorbell to see if residents are home and break in through windows or back doors if no one answers.

In addition to standard precautions, the Madison Police Department recommends protecting against burglary by making it appear like someone is home. Increased lighting around the house can deter some criminals, authorities said, and if students leave town, they should ask someone to retrieve their mail and bring the trash out.

— Susan Endres

Barrett talks recall at on-campus meeting

By Tyler Nickerson The Daily Cardinal

While the drive to recall Gov. Scott Walker has been a highprofile affair, leading Democratic candidate Tom Barrett sat down at der Rathskeller Thursday for a more intimate conversation with a group of students.

Barrett faces three competitors in the May 8 Democratic primary, but said Thursday he is not concerned about them.

“I’m focusing on Scott Walker and Scott Walker alone,” the Milwaukee mayor said.

A Marquette Law School poll released Wednesday has Barrett easily beating former Dane County Executive Kathleen Falk, state Sen. Kathleen Vinehout, D-Alma, and Wisconsin Secretary of State Doug La Follette in the primary.

The poll also shows Barrett and Walker tied in a head-to-

head contest. Walker defeated Barrett when they faced off in the 2010 gubernatorial race.

Barrett told the group of about 15 students at the event hosted by College Democrats the recall election will be a referendum on Walker because people are not satisfied with the governor’s performance.

“Are the people of this state satisfied with having a governor who has had the worst job record of any other governor in the country?” Barrett asked. “I know the answer to that is no.”

He also criticized Walker for the “ideological war that has been going on” in Wisconsin since he took office and said people don’t feel comfortable about how much out-of-state money Walker has raised, compared to the individual, in-state donors Barrett said have contributed to his campaign.

“It was great to have him,” said College Democrats of UW-Madison Chair Chris Hoffman. “We tried to get all the candidates on campus to meet students before the primary so they could see all of their options for the primary.”

While College Democrats cannot endorse a candidate until the primary because of its affiliation with the Democratic Party, another liberal group on campus, Young Progressives, has endorsed Falk in the primary.

“We chose to endorse Kathleen Falk because we think her values most closely match up with our own,” Young Progressives’ Chair Sam Gehler said. “She took a situation much like Scott Walker was handed in 2010 and she managed to balance a budget while receiving her union contracts.”

Woman arrested for fourth drunk-driving offense Madison police arrested a woman on East Washington Avenue early Thursday morning for her fourth offense of driving while intoxicated.

An officer stopped Christina Philbrick, 31, at 12:08 a.m. after witnessing her SUV run into

the median curb and also cause another driver to swerve suddenly to avoid a collision.

According to the police report, Philbrick had a 0.239 blood alcohol level when she was tested at the Dane County Jail.

Her last conviction for drunk

driving was in 2008.

DeSpain said alcohol has not been the only problem on Madison’s roads.

“We’ve seen people who are under the influence of heroin and driving,” he said. “[It] is a trend that is kind of concerning.”

lesia witkowsky/the daily cardinal

Transportation Services Director Patrick Kass said Thursday campus bus services need to take a 10-percent cut.

Cuts to campus buses met with opposition at forum

By Anna Duffin The Daily Cardinal

Students and other members of the UW-Madison community told officials Thursday they have concerns with proposed cuts to the campus bus services.

UW Transportation Services Director Patrick Kass said Transportation Services is currently operating in a deficit and needs to cut about 10 percent of the bus services to help balance its budget.

Proposed cuts could include combining services on routes 80 and 85 or eliminating half

of the route 81 trips while also eliminating half of the route 85 trips after 10 a.m.

The changes would mean longer wait times for campus busses and increased loads of people on busses.

Gene Devitt, a landlord in the Mansion Hill district, said he feared cutting busses could make campus less safe and could make it more difficult for individuals with disabilities to get around on campus.

“I don’t think we realize that

buses page 3

“…the great state University of Wisconsin should ever encourage that continual and fearless sifting and winnowing by which alone the truth can be found.”

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Today: am clouds

hi 67º / lo 52º

Saturday: beer showers hi 69º / lo 52º

Weekend, May 4-6, 2012

SUnday: scattered t-storms hi 70º / lo 55º

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An independent student newspaper, serving the University of Wisconsin-Madison community since 1892 Volume 122, Issue 69

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Managing Editor Nico Savidge

Error leads student to earn manatees degree

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Two scrolls discovered in the office of Mayor Paul Soglin read, “Let there be beer bongs and crowds of drunk-asses.”

Mifflin found to be holy day

By Ariel Shapiro and Poops McGee Fake News Friday

After a set of ancient scrolls was recently discovered in a well-hidden vault within the mayor’s office, it has been confirmed by experts that the Mifflin Street Block Party is and always will be an event that revolves around getting shitfaced and actin’ a fool.

According to UW officials, the first lines of the wellworn manuscript date back to biblical times, well before UW-Madison was established and even earlier still than when the state consisted of two cows per square yard.

“God said, ‘Let there be beer bongs and crowds of drunk-asses.’ And there were beer bongs and crowds of drunk-asses,” reads the first sentence of the worn yet still-decipherable text.

This information regarding the purpose of Mifflin shocked literally no one, especially Madison Mayor Paul Soglin, who attended the very first official Mifflin in 1969.

“Let’s be real, here.

Protesting the Vietnam War? Just a cover-up,” he said.

Theologists across the globe are up in arms over the revelation of this long-lost JudeoChristian holiday.

“I suppose Madison had it right all along,” said religious crypto-theologist Jim Christianson.

“This changes [dramatic pause] EVERYTHING.” The discovery of Mifflin’s legacy has inspired religious communities around the world to adopt their own versions of the Mifflin Street Block Party.

The Papacy is expected to bring in Pauly D from “Jersey Shore” to DJ the event at the Vatican,

which is expected to draw millions of worshippers.

“Aaww yeaaaahh,” Pope Benedict XVI said in a statement.

The document goes on to mention that Mifflin was even celebrated during medieval times, though it was referred to as “Ye Olde Festival of Mifflin” during that era.

According to Christianson, the annual religious festival was buried by the religious turmoil that swept Europe during the Reformation, though it was celebrated underground by a non-denominational cult known as the Mifflinati, who are currently lead by Soglin.

“You got me!” Soglin said while joyfully twirling the tassle of his Magnus Mifflinatus robes. “I am but the latest in a long line of faithful revelers who keep this most ancient and holy of traditions alive.”

Although students agree they always knew Mifflin was ordained by the Lord, not everyone is happy about the revelation of Mifflin’s ancient origins.

“You have got to be kidding me,” UW-Madison Dean of Students Lori Berquam said.

“There’s no way this can be true, right? Mifflin is the embodiment of evil!”

Upon saying those words, Berquam was smote by lightening late Thursday night.

With much of the world celebrating the ancient Mifflin festival this Saturday, stocks around the world have risen, particularly for booze, and economists believe this is the first step in solving the global recession.

“There is no question we’ve regained something we’ve lost,” Christianson said. “Nothing will ever [dramatic pause] BE THE SAME.”

When UW-Madison senior Vince George went to look at his Student Center page for the first time in years, he wanted to double check he had completed all of his degree requirements before his May 20 graduation.

It was then he discovered that due to an advising error made three years prior, George has earned a degree in manatees.

Despite George’s eight rigorous semesters filled with English and psychology classes, the subjects are all but absent from his transcript. He has appealed to the Office of

the Registrar, but has been told that with such short notice a correction is impossible.

“My first thought was, ‘Oh shit,’” George said. “The only thing I even know about manatees is that they smile a lot and are really smart or something.”

Since talking to the Daily Cardinal, George has closed his appeal due to job offers from Sea World, the Denver Aquarium and others.

“Hey,” George said, “it’s not like degrees in English or psychology were going to get me a job.”

Seniors pleased with choice of commencement speaker

By Ariel Shapiro Fake News Friday

Following the university’s announcement that former Yahoo! CEO Carol Bartz would deliver the commencement address for the Spring 2012 graduating class, students celebrated the news as “inspiring.”

“I can’t wait to hear about the tech industry,” said UW-Madison non-business or computer science major Jennifer Hanagan. “Carol Bartz can totally relate to my interests, passions and dreams.”

Senior Class President and man-about-town Steven Olikara heralded the commencement choice as “a victory beyond measure.”

“Who would wanna hear from someone lame like Bill Clinton or Neil DeGrasse Tyson or anyone who’s ever contributed to society in any capacity?”

Olikara said at a press conference. “This is way better.”

Chancellor David Ward said Bartz could impress upon the graduating class what really matters.

“She’s so freaking rich,” Ward said. “Like stupid rich.

It will allow students to realize that money, not knowledge, is the key to success.

Isn’t that what higher education is all about?”

Ward denied that the selection of Bartz, or the Mordriges before her, had anything to do with increasing their donations to the university.

“If it means millions more for the uniBARTZ versity, then it is merely a coinkidink,” Ward said with a shrug while browsing the web for UW-Madison’s new yacht research vessel, the S.S. Bartz.

Bartz, not wanting to reveal what she plans to say in what is anticipated to be her mindblowing commencement speech, merely reiterated how excited she was to help cultivate some of the country’s most promising graduates.

“Such bright, ideal little things,” Bartz said. “I am honored to be the one to inform them you can’t make it in this world without selling your soul. It will be painful at first, but they will come to accept it.”

“Mwahahahaha,” Bartz noted.

Students’ final project a death ray Sometime between ordering toxic compounds banned in all but two countries and installing a st at e - o f- t h e art global targeting system into their class’ final project, Johnny S. Albuquerque BLADHORN has grown convinced the project is in fact a death ray.

The class, Applications of Nuclear Technology to Make

the World a Greener Place, has been a staple of the Nuclear Engineering Department for nearly 30 years. In the past, final projects have been components of a machine Professor Andrew Bladhorn refused to explain in detail but referred to as “The Final Final Project.”

Albuquerque said the coursework was difficult, but no where near as much of a bother as Bladhorn’s breathing over their shoulders, stroking his hands and mumbling, “Gooood. Goooooood.”

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Weekend, May 4-6, 2012 3

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Changes in effect for recall primaries

By Adam Wollner The Daily Cardinal

on campus

A raving good time

Students dance at the Memorial Union Terrace Thursday night at the “Rave on the Lake,” hosted by the Wisconsin Union Directorate. + Photo by Daven Hines

Event to celebrate Native American culture UW-Madison Native American student organization, Wunk Sheek, will host the 35th annual Spring Pow Wow Saturday, which celebrates Native American culture with singing, dancing, crafts and vendors.

Wunk Sheek member Dylan Jennings said his group hopes the event will bring together students and the community while raising awareness of Native American presence on campus.

“Traditionally, [pow wows]

were used to bring our people together and other nations and other groups of people together in a uniting kind of way,” Jennings said. “And our purpose is to bring this cultural event to the area.”

The event has not taken place for the last three years due to a lack of funding, but this year, Jennings said the group hopes to draw more than 500 people.

Jennings said his group recognizes the pow wow will take

place the same day as the Mifflin Street Block Party, but said members are optimistic about attendance because it offers students a sober alternative to Mifflin.

“It’s a really great way to meet people and it’s a really great way to celebrate a Saturday not drinking,” Jennings added.

The event is free and open to the public and will last from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. in the Shell at 1430 Monroe St. —Sam Cusick

As Wisconsin voters prepare to head back to the polls for Tuesday’s recall primary, they can expect a different experience from the last time they cast a ballot because of a unique recall rule and changes in election law.

On Tuesday, voters will have the ability to cross party lines and vote for candidates from different parties in the primary recall elections, for governor and lieutenant governor. For example, a voter could cast his or her ballot for a Democrat in the governor’s primary but a Republican in the lieutenant governor’s primary since they can only vote for one candidate per office.

These rules only apply to Tuesday’s election because each recall election is technically a separate event that happens to occur on the same date. Normally, voters would only be able to cast their ballots in one party’s primary.

“The officeholders are being recalled separately and luckily for the taxpayers we’ve got this all lined up to happen on the same day,” Government Accountability Board spokesperson Reid Magney said.

Additionally, voters will not have to show a state-issued form of photo identification

at the polls to vote Tuesday.

Unlike in the February primary elections, certain provisions of the state’s voter ID law, which Walker signed into law last year, will not be in effect after two separate circuit court judges issued injunctions barring the enforcement of the photo ID requirement.

In-person absentee voting ends Friday, but Photo ID cards are also not required to vote absentee. To vote absentee by mail, voters must postmark their ballot by election day.

The new residency standards in the voter ID law, however, will still be in place. To cast a ballot, voters must have lived at their current address for at least 28 days.

Previously, voters only needed 10 days to establish residency.

Madison Student Vote Coalition co-founder Hannah Somers said the organization plans to use social media and e-mail in the final days leading up to the primary to inform students of what they need to bring to the polls to vote.

After the primary, Somers said the group will increase its efforts to register students and provide information on absentee ballots for the June 5 general recall elections before the semester ends.

Ben Pierson/cardinal file photo

Voters will not have to show photo identification at polling places Tuesday after judges ruled the law unconstitutional.

buses from page 1 late at night, walking on campus isn’t the safest thing,” Devitt said. “If you’re going to get people to come to this school, you’ve got to have safety.”

Student Transportation Board member Laura Checovich said the board should have been more involved in conversations surrounding the cuts.

Checovich said the lack of inclusion of the STB in the plans is indicative of a larger problem of shared governance infringements at UW. “It’s insulting,” Checovich said. “Students are left out of the room on all kinds of things that involve segregated fees, and

we’re smart enough to be in the room and we’re smart enough to have an opinion. I think it’s time everyone caught up to that.”

Kass said many of the meetings regarding the cuts were planned last-minute, and Transportation Services asked the STB for input earlier in the year.

He said Transportation Services hopes to cut money in areas that would have the least impact on services and gain input from students through additional campus forums.

“I think it’s really challenging when you have to cut any service to be able to satisfy everyone,” Kass said. “Everyone has services that they want or feel are needed, and cuts are difficult.”

arts The jock, the nerd...the Existentialist?

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Weekend, May 4-6, 2012

Sean Reichard your raison d’être

T

he collegiate existentialist is a stereotype as ingrained as the frat boy and the Chaucer expert cum fast food service major. For some parents, it’s disconcerting to have Junior or Sister disappear off to college, only to see them return after a semester or two wholly changed.

Some parents may be repulsed that their children are suddenly… questioning everything and reading big dour French books that reek of clove cigarettes. And we all know questioning is the latchkey to the devil’s workshop.

But that’s beside the point.

Existentialism is one of those philosophies particularly suited to a campus environment— where not everyone is going to be from the same place or have the same feelings, and where you’ll be learning more than you may have ever learned in high school. You never stop learning in your entire life, but college is likely the biggest confluence of thought you’ll encounter.

In a nutshell, Existentialism is one or both of the following: 1.) a belief one’s philosophy is derived from the individual and the individual’s experience and 2.) a philosophy that holds that existence cannot be understood solely

through moral and/or scientific thinking. Of course, I’m leaving out a lot of important bits—facticity, the Other, the precedence of existence over essence—but I’m trying to keep it simple.

For some, existentialism is synonymous with nihilism—specifically, some latch onto existential nihilism, which holds that life and the universe have no inherent m e a ni n g.

to you instead of acting under the duress of others and/or other forces. And this is what resonates with college kids.

It brings up another useful stereotype: the guy/girl who backpacks around Europe for a few months or joins a monastery

Bleak, graphic by dylan moriarty right?

Except existentialism moves beyond existential so they can “find themselves.” nihilism to say even if existence Because any foray into existenhas no inherent meaning, it is tialism is usually preceded by a necessary for the individual to crisis of identity. make meaning in their lives.

A few weeks ago I ran into a A major point of existential- guy—a fellow UW student—and ism is authenticity—being true after some small talk, we ambled

dailycardinal.com

towards philosophy. He told me about how he grew up a strict Catholic, but drifted away from it as college went on. He started having doubts about the existence of God and other theological quandaries. This led him to the work of Jean-Paul Sartre, who was basically the avatar of existentialism—a small dour Frenchman who wrote some big dour Fr e n ch

b o o ks— who was also one of the most important minds of the 20th century.

But he also talked about Ralph Waldo Emerson; he showed me the copy of “Self-Reliance” he carried everywhere. Emerson was separated from Sartre by almost a century, as well as continentally, but this brings up another

point of existentialism: Strains of existential thought and things that may be termed existential predate actual existentialism.

Actually, that’s a decent example of existence preceding essence.

As a whole, existentialism draws from two 19th century philosophers, Søren Kierkegaard and Friedrich Nietzsche, as well as the literary works of Dostoevsky. To a certain extent, Ecclesiastes 1 is an important existential cornerstone. Existentialism is nothing entirely new, like any philosophy. It was not invented in post World War II France or 19th century Dennmark. It is sort of a philosophical compilation of a number of ideas that stand apart from each other but move in the same general direction, like spokes on a wheel connecting at a hub.

Most importantly, having existential beliefs or experiencing an existential crisis is not contingent upon knowing what existentialism is. You don’t need to read “Being and Nothingness” until the spine is cracked and your whole mind is swimming in itself. But it is one of the most important self-centric philosophies around, and certainly one that can’t be avoided in the conflux of campus.

Have you been looking for someone to wax philosophical with? Ask Sean to be your partner in pondering at sreichard@wisc.edu.

For niche fans, Death Grips cashes in at ‘The Money Store’ CD REVIEW

The Money Store Death Grips

By Cameron Graff The Daily Cardinal

When talking about Death Grips, inevitably someone’s going to mention Odd Future.

It’s not an entirely inaccurate comparison; both (on paper, at least) are grimy, punky, shockinclined takes on hip-hop with a tremendous hype train backing them. Except Odd Future, as time has revealed, aren’t all they’ve painted themselves as—just take a look at Tyler, the Creator; less brooding hiphop messiah and more gangly Dennis the Menace. Death Grips’ debut, The Money Store, makes a point of drawing a distinct line in the sand between the band and its competitors.

Death Grips are real, terrifying and incredible.

Where Tyler spends all his time posturing and posing for the camera, Death Grips front man Stefen Burnett seems to breathe pure evil. His raps are thick and monstrous and his delivery is more Saetia than Snoop—the man even looks like some kind of terrifying urban Rasputin, with a shaved head, thick beard and bizarre, cultish tattoos all over his

body. On the debut mixtape Ex-Military’s opener, “Beware,” Burnett chanted what might as well be Death Grips’ de facto manifesto; “I close my eyes and seize it/ I clench my fist and beat it/ I light my torch and burn it/ I am the beast I worship.” Violence, destruction, ambition and satanic narcissism—this is what Death Grips in essence is.

It’s going to turn a lot of people off, no doubt. But anyone who can stomach Burnett spitting bile over car-crash production for an hour will find one of the most rewarding and original hip-hop albums of 2012.

The Money Store starts off on an absolute red herring—a propulsive Radiohead-esque drum beat opens “Get Got” before Burnett, the most passive he’s ever sounded, actually raps the hook. And while “Get Got” might be more restrained than the rest of the tracks, Burnett’s writing is as ridiculous as ever; the chorus goes, “Poppin’ off the fuckin’ block knot/ Clockin’ wrist slit, watch bent thought bot.” What does it mean? No one knows, but it’s provocative. Or maybe it’s just absolutely insane.

This isn’t conscious hiphop—Death Grips have more in common with MF Doom’s Dadaist ethos than Drake, that’s for sure. Unfortunately, this more often than not proves to be the group’s biggest hangup; there isn’t much to be found here for the intellectually starved.

But it really doesn’t matter

Burnett’s writing reads like a crack-head fell asleep facedown on a keyboard—Death Grip’s main intention is atmosphere. Take pseudo-single “I’ve Seen Footage,” in which Burnett barks what may or may not be words over a warbling synth line and a frantic Nine Inch Nails beat.

The only discernible bit is the hook (the title shouted really loud, occasionally swapped out for “I’ve seen crazy shit, man, crazy shit”), but it doesn’t matter. The raps end up being more tribal-chant, more Burroughs cut\paste than poetry. It’s there purely to augment the fury of the production. As a cohesive whole, “I’ve Seen Footage” exists in a universe of its own; half psychotic rave, half terrifying industrial pummel—it’s absolutely fantastic.

And you’ve got the dynamic production duo of Zach Hill and Andy Morin to thank for that. Hill’s been a staple of the West Coast noise-rock scene for more than a decade now and his manic drumming (especially live) provides a big chunk of the band’s bite.

Meanwhile, Morin comes through on keyboards and samples, and his work is frequently the most interesting part of the whole affair. The beats aren’t traditional glossy hip-hop; everything about the production is slimy and gross and heavily indebted to the hardcore scene of yesteryear and noise-rock. “Hacker” is the obvious standout, with

its nightmare-dubstep drum beat and its dystopian take on LCD Soundsystem funkiness.

Imagine if Kanye West wrote a soundtrack to a Gaspar Noé film, and you’re, like, 90 percent of the way there. It’s a doozy, to say the least.

The Money Store is a beast in every instance of the word; it’s fearsome, it’s tremendous and it’s an absolute game-changer in a genre that’s been painfully

stagnant for too long now. I don’t know what kind of future Death Grips have—they’re a niche band with a niche sound signed to a major-label, destined for either greatness or a quick implosion. After a debut like this, though, suddenly it doesn’t seem ridiculous that these terrors will be around to alienate audiences for years to come, and nothing could excite me more.

comics

More innocent times... The Greeks occasionally wove handkerchiefs out of asbestos.

Weekend, May 4-6, 2012 • 5

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Not going

Today’s Sudoku

Evil Bird

By Caitlin Kirihara kirihara@wisc.edu

© Puzzles by Pappocom

Eatin’ Cake

By Dylan Moriarty EatinCake@gmail.com

Solution, tips and computer program available at www.sudoku.com.

Fill in the grid so that every row, every column and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9.

Caved In

By Nick Kryshak nkryshak@wisc.edu

Today’s Crossword Puzzle

Scribbles n’ Bits

Answer key available at www.dailycardinal.com

POLKA PARTY ACROSS 1 Redhead of sitcoms 5 Unwelcome greenhouse guest 9 Unpleasantly severe 14 Tyrannical boss 15 Wader with a curved bill 16 Say “I do” without a big do 17 Word with “body” or “grand” 18 Gender-bending Kinks hit 19 Less likely to make mistakes 20 Like many traditions 23 Young kiltie 24 Sundae topping, perhaps 25 Makes mention of (with “to”) 27 ___ obstat (error-free) 30 Male goose 32 Tempest in a teapot 33 Scene of any event 36 Time spans 39 Neighbor of Bolivia 41 Summer escapes 42 Mosaic piece 43 Impudent talk 44 Estate lawyer’s specialties 46 It’s much sooner than later 47 Chaperone

9 Turnstile payment 4 51 Old Persian potentate 53 Emulate an eagle 55 Misfield a ground ball, say 56 Carefree, comfortable existence 62 Morning rouser 64 Guitar lick 65 Drop one’s jaw 66 Change the color, again 67 New York state canal 68 Apple figure?

69 “That’ll teach you!” look 70 Oft-shed thing 71 “Good” or “bad” ending DOWN 1 Gave the slip to 2 Hybrid citrus fruit 3 Do some last-minute learning 4 Certain Arabian Peninsula inhabitant 5 “Miracle on the Hudson” occupation 6 Dark shades, to bards 7 Grain storage locale 8 Abdicator of 1917 9 Was in charge of 10 Church garment 11 One place to spin one’s wheels 12 Broccoli bit 13 Groups of buffalo

Bottom of a boat Winemaker Gallo Centipede’s multitude Afternoon activities “Hey, what’s the big ___?”

29 Clever exchange 30 Run the ___ (cover the entire range) 31 Swiss high points 34 Army creatures?

35 Songstress Vikki 37 Hand-cream additive 38 Hanging on by a thread?

40 World power until 1991 45 Sheriff’s badge shape 48 Less agitated 50 Starting point 51 Big name in department stores 52 “I Love a Parade” composer Harold 53 “Lost in Translation” director Coppola 54 Buyer’s proposal 57 Worrisome guitar part?

58 Land o’ the shamrock 59 Wedding-dress trim 60 Collection of narrative poems 61 Hankerings 63 Type of whiskey or bread

By Melanie Shibley Shibley@wisc.edu

By Natasha Soglin graphics@dailycardinal.com

Charlie & Boomer Classicassic

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Washington and the Bear

By Derek Sandberg kalarooka@gmail.com

opinion Government must prioritize education 6

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Weekend, May 4-6, 2012

kate krebs opinion columnist

E

ducation is a hot topic this year, and for good reason. With new legislation and budget cuts, Wisconsin’s public schools are seeing a slew of teacher layoffs, and public colleges are facing big changes regarding loans and debt. All this legislation is making me question what priorities the state and nation hold.

As a state school, UW-Madison is known for giving high quality education at an affordable price. However, even this “affordable” price is sometimes too much for prospective undergraduates to handle. So instead of going straight into the workforce, many students take out loans from public or private sources, which can lead to massive amounts of debt.

One of the cheapest loan options are subsidized Stafford loans. These need-based loans currently have lower interest rates than their unsubsidized counterparts, and students do not pay interest on the loans until after her or she has left school. With legislation threatening to pass this year, the interest rates on subsidized loans will double, and graduate and professional students will no longer qualify for unsubsidized Stafford student loans.

This means interest will accrue

very quickly while they are in school, and post-secondary students could be paying thousands more in interest as they pay off loans.

For families below the poverty line, more options are available. Grants are given to students whose families are barely scraping by, and lower interest rates can be found.

But even though grants and low-interest loans are available for low income families, students whose parents have relatively lucrative careers have fewer options. If an undergrad’s parents are making $100,000 per year, that student will probably not be offered grants or subsidized loans. The problem is not every student’s parents are giving them money for their education, so no matter how much parents make, some students are simply unable to manage college costs.

This leads to the big question: What are our priorities here in the U.S.? Giving kids money for school is expensive, but it would yield a population of educated voters ready to compete globally. The issue reaches beyond college, affecting children in elementary, middle and high school.

Budget cuts under Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker have left school districts with no choice but to whittle their teaching staff down to a tiny, albeit less costly number.

And while Dane County’s K-12 teachers have escaped the layoff madness, other

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Isabel Alvarez/cardinal file photo

Gov. Scott Walker speaks to universitiy students in 2009. Since his time in office, the UW System and school districts have seen budget cuts, and critics say it is hurting Wisconsin schools.

Wisconsinites haven’t been so lucky. Hundreds, if not thousands, across the state are losing their jobs, and our youths’ education will no doubt suffer because of it.

An affordable, quality education at every level should be the goal. Wisconsin’s public schools should see small class sizes and excited instructors, not stressed-out teachers with too many students and courses to prepare for. Undergraduates should be able to attend college without the fear of financial distress looming in the future.

Graduate and professional students deserve the same.

It doesn’t make sense to undermine or discourage education by raising the price.

Education leads to better jobs, health, industry, economy and a better nation as a whole. There is no way to justify increasing the expense, and though we have all heard “that money has to come from somewhere,” investing in education is money well spent.

Unfortunately, Walker’s budget bill relies on the UW System to carry 38 percent of

Wisconsin’s budget cuts, even though the system is responsible for only 7 percent of state expenditures. For this reason, students are bearing the brunt of higher tuition costs when they should be focusing on school. To prevent this ridiculous solution from continuing, Wisconsin’s students must rally and demand a change or new leadership in the coming year.

Kate Krebs is a first-year student majoring in English and Spanish. To tell us what you think of her article, send all feedback to opinion@dailiycardinal.com.

‘Cinco de Mifflin’ criticism does not address real racism in America matthew curry opinion columnist

H

aving read the recent letter sent by Badgers Against Racism to The Daily Cardinal, I feel it is necessary to stand against unfounded and inappropriate accusations of racism. Furthermore, by calling the term “Cinco de Mifflin” racist, Badgers Against Racism is implying the students who thought of the phrase are racists themselves.

To me, this is extremely inappropriate and unfair.

To me, “Cinco de Mifflin” represents progress, because it actually embraces a mixing of different cultures’ traditions.

First of all, if you’re going to label something as racist or racially offensive, you had better have a good reason to say so and have real support behind such accusations. I am sure every normal, rational person probably has already disregarded Badgers Against Racism’s claim, but it seems people are worried or held-

back from truly fighting back against these types of statements. This is why this rhetoric must be stopped in its tracks, because militant political correctness does nothing to deter actual racism.

Being Americans, we live in a culture that is a mixture of different cultures and traditions. In fact, to deny this overwhelming and obvious influence is to deny the power of the “melting pot” in the U.S. So isn’t it inevitable, and actually normal, for American culture to be a blend of different cultures and ideals?

To me, “Cinco de Mifflin” represents progress because the phrase actually embraces a mixing of UW-Madison tradition with the tradition of Cinco de Mayo. To write off this type of cultural blending can only hurt racial harmony.

Real racism does exist and there are great records of what happened. One thing I can confidently say is that true racists, people who truly harbor hatred on the basis of race and lineage, would never endorse or respect any aspect a culture or group they hate. You really can’t have both.

This is what confuses me, and many other students, who are constantly being accused of being racists because they do not adhere to strict political correctness. There is absolutely no evidence, no indica-

tion and no reason to suspect “Cinco de Mifflin” and its celebration is anything other than some students’ attempt to find a fun, light-hearted theme people can come together and celebrate around.

I want to make this last part specifically for Dean of Students Lori Berquam, someone I am sure we are all familiar with by now.

“Cinco de Mifflin” has no bearing on the honest, intellectual battle against racism in society.

First, my fellow Mifflin enthusiasts and I, are not insensitive racists and many people in Madison are not offended by this. Do you see any public outcry over this or strong social reaction? Dean Berquam, I know you did not mean for your video to be incendiary, but when you go spouting off about racism or something of that seriousness, there had better be a good reason for it.

I don’t like being told I’m a insensitive, Mexican-hating racist because of a completely innocent phrase to accompany celebrating Mifflin, an event

that is truly open to anyone and everyone of all backgrounds— at least for us students. Please, let’s all get real.

In the grand scheme of global suffering that has plagued human existence, “Cinco de Mifflin” has no bearing on the honest, intellectual battle against racism in society. If any-

thing, students should be asking where Badgers Against Racism and Dean Berquam stand when it comes to the real racist aspect of American society today.

Matthew Curry is a junior mjaoring in political science and environmental studies. Please send all feedback to opinion@ dailycardinal.com.

sports

dailycardinal.com

Weekend, May 4-6, 2012

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‘Junior’ Seau’s death brings attention to a real problem

Concussions in football have been linked to several cases of CTE and it is time something is done about it Matt masterson master’s degree

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o player encompassed what football fans love about the game more than Tiaina Seau, Jr. “Junior” was the face of the San Diego franchise for more than a decade, racking up a mountain of personal accolades and carrying an overmatched Charger team all the way to Super Bowl XXIX in 1994.

After his suicide Wednesday although, Seau may be the face of something else.

His death immediately brought attention back to rampant debate on concussions in football and the safety of those who play the game.

Commissioner Roger Goodell has been condemned in recent years for turning the NFL into the “No Fun League.” Ravens safety Bernard Pollard will tell you that the ‘Commish has reduced the game to the level of flag football with his Draconian punishments for hits to the head. Jonathan Vilma and the rest of the players suspended in the wake of the New Orleans Saints’ bounty scandal surely have some choice words for Goodell as well.

The truth is, however, concussions have become a serious threat to the future of the NFL. There’s a name for what

happens after James Harrison decapitates a wide receiver over the middle. No, it’s not “hit stick” or “momentum changer,” it’s actually called chronic traumatic encephalopathy, or CTE. This degenerative disease is caused by frequent concussions and results in, among other things, dementia, aggression and depression.

Doctors at the Boston University School of Medicine have found traces of CTE in the brains of 11 former NFL players since 2008. Seau just might be number 12. Less than 24 hours after his death, BU officially requested Seau’s brain for observation to see if he too fell victim to this degenerative disease.

In February of 2011 another former NFL player, Chicago Bear great Dave Duerson, committed suicide in a very similar fashion to Seau. In his last moments, Duerson sent a text to his wife and four children asking his brain be examined for the betterment of still-living NFLers.

Exactly one year to the day before Seau’s suicide, the same doctors who will be examining his brain found that Duerson had indeed suffered from CTE. Concussions are not a problem that only affects football— certainly other sports involve the risk of blows to the head— but no other sport markets these hits to their viewers like the NFL. Videos with such colorful names as “Thunder and

Destruction” and “Moment of Impact” have both received the NFL seal of approval and can be found on the Internet with ease.

The NFL is a ratingsdriven league no doubt, and hard hits bring in the viewers more than any touchdown or kickoff return ever could, and this is exactly the reason why Goodell has become a villain to so many fans. He’s taking away what they love about the game—the violence.

When it comes down to it, what do we value more, football or the safety of those who play it? Perhaps a minority put player safety first, but for most of us it is football without question. When players’ lives are being cut severely short however, something has got to give.

As long as Roger Goodell is in charge of the NFL, we as fans can expect to see more and more fines and suspensions handed out to players like Harrison and Pollard for their headshots. But aren’t punishments better than no game at all?

We may not know right now what lead to his tragic suicide, but if it is found that Junior Seau indeed suffered from CTE, then this could be the watershed moment for concussions in sports. The moment that will change the NFL forever.

Do you put player safety first?

How do you thing Seau’s death will change football? Let Matt know at mrmasterson@wisc.edu.

wil Gibb/the daily cardinal

Wisconsin boasts three pitchers on their roster all with winning records. Junior pitcher Megan McIntosh is 7-5 with a 2.75 ERA.

softball from page 8 was able to come back, while junior pitcher Meghan McIntosh and sophomore pitcher Amanda Najdek held the Phoenix scoreless through the last six innings.

Head coach Yvette Healy said this week’s trio of close games put her team in the right mindset to beat a quality team like Michigan.

“I really think we had a chip on our shoulder coming into this week with two non-conference games,” said McIntosh. “It was really redeeming, getting these wins.”

The Wolverines, like the Badgers, sustained a series loss against Illinois last weekend, which allowed both Purdue and Nebraska to come within a half game in the Big Ten Standings.

Michigan’s last game was a nine-inning battle on Tuesday with Eastern Michigan that ended with a walk-off home run by freshman pitcher Sara Driesenga secure a 4-2 victory.

Driesenga is the Wolverine’s leading hitter with a .373 average, while Michigan has won its last 18 games against Wisconsin.

The Wolverines also boast the Big Ten leader in both ERA and wins in freshman pitcher Haylie Wagner, who recorded her 25th vic-

domination from page 8 Daher said, later inviting the Herald to “step up or step the fuck off.”

The Cardinal claimed yet another in a long line of softball victories last spring. Despite the best efforts of beloved former Herald editor Jordan Schelling, whose arguments with umpire Big Red (of Big Red’s Steaks) totally didn’t make him look like a raging asshat, the game slipped away like Adam Holt’s bone from its socket.

Scandal has rocked the Cardinal Athletic Department in the past year, however, as the paper enters Friday’s game beneath the cloud of a “Bountygate” scandal.

Allegedly under directives from Cardinal management, former basketball writer Sam Sussman targeted Herald managing editor Ryan Rainey in last year’s football game, attempting to injure Rainey with an unnecessary hit in the game’s final seconds.

Cardinal manager Matthew Kleist said Sussman is no longer with the Cardinal, and has been sent to Siberia for “re-education.”

Kleist declined to clarify whether the bounty system was still in place, saying of Rainey only, “If he dies, he dies.”

But Herald sports editor Kelly Erickson said she was not worried about the Cardinal’s hard hits and general badassery, though she really should be. Erickson said the Herald’s line-up of two actual staff-

tory on the season Tuesday.

The Badgers lead Michigan in every major offensive category other than home runs and walks, despite trailing the Wolverines in the standings. With that in mind, Wisconsin has high hopes for this weekend.

“Our confidence is high going in [against Michigan],” McIntosh said after Wednesday’s games. “There’s no pressure on us. Just go in and play Wisconsin softball and we should be fine.”

Peace cites the importance of focusing in practice and avoiding little mistakes as the keys to victory in this weekend’s series.

“We want to play our best softball coming into this weekend,” Peace said. “We want to keep it clean, we want to play as hard as we can and go out proud with what we’ve accomplished.”

The Badgers are one win away from their all-time single season record, with two weekends of play left in the regular season.

The first pitch of Saturday’s “Sign of Summer” doubleheader is set to be thrown at noon, with the first 200 fans receiving a free pair of Badger sunglasses.

Sunday’s game is slated to begin at noon, with a public ice cream social afterwards with the team. ers and whatever Platteville baseball rejects stumbled drunkenly out of Silver Mine Subs should provide a decent offense.

“The tantamount of runs should be high,” Erickson said. “That’s how words work, right? I can just add letters to the front of them and they’ll mean the same thing? Cool, that’s kind of my thing.”

The Herald will also have an emotional force behind them, as the team has promised to make a significant contribution to charities serving laid off pubic sector workers if by some miracle they win Friday.

BH editor-in-chief Signe Brewster said that, while she knows her team has no chance against the Cardinal juggernaut, just spreading awareness for the cause means a lot to her.

“We know the pubic sector has been suffering,” Brewster said, “almost as much as our copy editors are.”

With 120 years of tradition behind it, however, the Cardinal would appear all but unstoppable.

And as a newspaper that quite literally has furniture older than its “competition,” sports editor Ryan Evans knows a second straight victory over the Herald clowns is in the bag.

“It’s going to be a nice little Friday,” Evans said. “We’re going to go to Vilas Park, kick some Herald ass, do some keg stands, maybe a couple scotchy-poos.”

He later added, “I’m tired of ballin’, punk I’m playing softball.”

Sports

weekend may 4-6, 2012 DailyCardinal.com

Softball

Ass Kickings

First-place Wolverines visit Madison for three

By Brett Bachman the daily cardinal

wil gibb/the daily cardinal

Sophomore outfielder Mary Massei is one of seven Badgers with a batting average over .300. She is third on the team at .354.

The Wisconsin softball team (12-6 Big Ten, 33-15 overall) will play its final home series of the season this weekend against current Big Ten leader Michigan (13-5, 34-15).

The Badgers are coming off three non-conference wins against Bradley and Green Bay this week, falling two-games-to-one against Purdue last weekend. They are looking to extend their 13-game home win streak with victories over No. 29 Michigan. “[The Purdue series] is in the back of our mind. We weren’t happy with our performance there,” said sophomore infielder Stephanie Peace, who went 4-for-8 Wednesday with two triples and four RBI. “We don’t want to let that happen this weekend.”

Sophomore pitcher Cassandra Darrah recorded her ninth shutout of the season in a 4-0 effort over Green Bay in the first game of Wednesday’s doubleheader, improving to 21 wins and 21 complete games.

After going down 2-0 in the first inning of the nightcap, Wisconsin

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Cardinalistas celebrate crushing the skulls and spirits of Herald staffers last spring. Expect the same Friday afternoon.

Cardinalistas set for next softball triumph

By Evan I. Disco the daily cardinal

The green fields of Vilas Park will run a stained red Friday afternoon, after the vaunted journalists of The Daily Cardinal will once again slaughter their foes from equestrian journal The Badger Herald in the papers’ annual softball contest.

After a year spent wiping the floor with the Herald’s attempts at news coverage, you might think the Big Red Machine was tired of so thoroughly dominating its socalled rivals. But you’d be wrong.

Oh, would you be wrong.

Instead, the Cardinal promises to roar through its over-matched opponent on the Vilas softball diamond with the same ferocity it takes to crushing the Herald each day in print, according to DC photo editor and enforcer Stephanie Daher.

“Man, I’ve only been curbstomping their photo desk, like, every day this semester—if they want that ass-kicking to continue I’m more than happy to oblige,”

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