Tuesday, September 15, 2015 - The Daily Cardinal by The Daily Cardinal

University of Wisconsin-Madison

Making history:

UW Athletics Hall of Fame adds two

Since 1892 dailycardinal.com

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Carly Aquilino and Jenny Zigrino coming to the Union Theater

Comedy A to Z

+SPORTS, page 7

+ARTS, page 6

Lab finds cheaper way to catalyze hydrogen By Sarah Ferguson the daily cardinal

With energy prices soaring alongside growing concerns about the effects of traditional fossil fuels on the environment, a UW-Madison researcher has become one step closer to finding an alternative, renewable energy source. Chemistry professor Song Jin’s research team published a new way to catalyze hydrogen, which serves as a possible alter-

native for gasoline and other energy sources. Method is 1000 times cheaper than a traditional catalyst and less harmful to the environment, according to a university release. Hydrogen made from splitting water molecules can make electricity and heat or store energy to be used for later. However, the most commonly used catalyst for these reactions are noble metals, like platinum, palladium, iridium and gold,

which are extremely expensive. Jin originally started his search for alternative metals using iron pyrite, also known as fool’s gold. It was not until Jin and his students, Miguel Caban-Acevedo and Michael Stone, substituted cobalt pyrite and phosphorous that an efficient noble metal alternative was found. The new cobalt catalyst is

hydrogen page 3

Bascom hill

Basking in the Bascom sun Students take a break from academics to take a nap or catch up on some reading on one of UW-Madison’s most popular lounging spots. + Photo by Kaitlyn Veto

Madison woman attacked, sexually assaulted on bike path

kaitlyn veto/the daily cardinal

The corner of State Street and North Lake Street is the future home of Forage Kitchen and 7-Eleven.

New restaurant, 7-Eleven coming to the corner of State and Lake By Negassi Tesfamichael the Daily cardinal

Forage Kitchen, a specialty salad and cold press juice bar, and a 7-Eleven convenience store will open on the corner of State Street and North Lake Street. The restaurant, started by UW-Madison graduates Henry Aschauer and Doug Hamaker,

will “use fresh ingredients with inspiration from around the world,” according to Hamaker. “Madison is very into fitness and getting healthy, local and organic ingredients, and that is what we are going to be featuring,” Hamaker said. The menu features exclusively healthy items, from

superfoods to creative housemade specialty beverages. “Our goal is to make creative food that tastes good,” Hamaker noted. “People won’t even realize how healthy it is for them.” Hamaker and Aschauer

restaurant page 3

The Madison Police Department is currently investigating a sexual assault near Capital City Trail reported early Saturday morning, according to an incident report. A woman in her 30s was reportedly walking along the bike path near Livingston Avenue and Wilson Street when she was attacked from behind, dragged into the bushes and raped. “The brutality, the savagery of this attack is something the likes of which typically I haven’t even seen in my over 30 years of policing,” MPD Chief Mike Koval said in a Sept. 12 WKOW article. “It was only but for the grace of God that this young woman was not killed.” After the attack, the survivor managed to crawl back to the path where a passerby found her and contacted the police almost two hours after the initial attack. MPD is still searching for the suspect, described in the report as about 5 feet 8 inches tall with a thin build and possibly wearing shorts at the time of the attack. Madison community members will host a march Thursday night to “Take Back the Bike Path” and show solidarity with the survivor, according to a Facebook post. Demonstrators

will march down the bike path, posting anti-rape signs and stickers to denounce sexual crimes in Madison.

“The brutality, the savagery of this attack is something the likes of which typically I haven’t even seen in my over 30 years of policing.” Mike Koval chief Madison Police Department

MPD is now treating the case as an attempted homicide, according to the WKOW article, and is asking any potential witnesses to come forward with information. “This is a safe city, but for now, at this moment, we have someone at large, who is literally diabolical,” Koval said in the article. “And in that sense, we have to be more than ever circumspect in terms of being aware of our environment, the ways or means which we travel about our city and that these things, until we know more, are something that I want people to be vigilant about.” At press time, calls made to MPD were unsuccessful. —Bri Maas

“…the great state University of Wisconsin should ever encourage that continual and fearless sifting and winnowing by which alone the truth can be found.”

almanac 2

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

An independent student newspaper, serving the University of Wisconsin-Madison community since 1892 Volume 125, Issue 8

2142 Vilas Communication Hall 821 University Avenue Madison, Wis., 53706-1497 (608) 262-8000 • fax (608) 262-8100

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Between the Sheets sex and the student body Turning up the heat while turning down the volume

News and Editorial

edit@dailycardinal.com Editor-in-Chief James Dayton

Managing Editor Emily Gerber

News Team News Manager Adelina Yankova Campus Editor Bri Maas College Editor Ellie Herman City Editor Negassi Tesfamichael State Editor Andrew Hahn Associate News Editor Laura Grulke Features Editor Gilly McBride Opinion Editors Sergey Fedossov • Max Lenz Editorial Board Chair Conor Murphy Arts Editors Allison Garcia • Conor Murphy Sports Editors Jake Powers • Zach Rastall Almanac Editors Dylan Anderson • Liam Hutchison Photo Editors Will Chizek • Kaitlyn Veto Graphics Editor Bethany Dahl Multimedia Editors Steven Rybeck • Jen Wagman Science Editor Sai-Suma Samudrala Life & Style Editor McKenna Gramoll Special Pages Editors Kerry Huth • Justine Jones Copy Chiefs Theda Berry • Ellie Borstad John Joutras • Sam Wagner Copy Editors Megan Grove • Ellisa Kosadi Social Media Manager Madison Schiller

Business and Advertising business@dailycardinal.com Business Manager Andrew Hahm Advertising Manager Corissa Pennow Marketing Director Victoria Fok

The Daily Cardinal is a nonprofit organization run by its staff members and elected editors. It receives no funds from the university. Operating revenue is generated from advertising and subscription sales. The Daily Cardinal is published weekdays and distributed at the University of WisconsinMadison and its surrounding community with a circulation of 10,000. Capital Newspapers, Inc. is the Cardinal’s printer. The Daily Cardinal is printed on recycled paper. The Cardinal is a member of the Associated Collegiate Press and the Wisconsin Newspaper Association. All copy, photographs and graphics appearing in The Daily Cardinal are the sole property of the Cardinal and may not be reproduced without written permission of the editor in chief. The Daily Cardinal accepts advertising representing a wide range of views. This acceptance does not imply agreement with the views expressed. The Cardinal reserves the right to reject advertisements judged offensive based on imagery, wording or both. Complaints: News and editorial complaints should be presented to the editor in chief. Business and advertising complaints should be presented to the business manager. Letters Policy: Letters must be word processed and must include contact information. No anonymous letters will be printed. All letters to the editor will be printed at the discretion of The Daily Cardinal. Letters may be sent to opinion@ dailycardinal.com.

Editorial Board James Dayton • Emily Gerber Conor Murphy • Sergey Fedossov Max Lenz

Board of Directors Herman Baumann, President Phil Brinkman • James Dayton Victoria Fok • Emily Gerber Andrew Hahm • Janet Larson Don Miner • Corissa Pennow Nancy Sandy • Jennifer Sereno Jason Stein • Tina Zavoral

For the record Corrections or clarifications? Call The Daily Cardinal office at 608-262-8000 or send an email to edit@dailycardinal.com.

Anna Welch sex columnist

reetings Badgers! When it comes to adjusting to college life some of us may have underestimated just how close the quarters would be, and in the same thread, how tricky it can be to get our rooms to ourselves. We most likely have at least one roomie to share a living space with and although these people can be our best friends, they can also be the biggest cock blocks and pussy preventers—whether they mean to be or not.

...trying not to make a sound while being pleasured can create a new and oh-so-steamy internal struggle.

For those of us with roomies who don’t care to aid us in the crusade for copulation, we may have to get creative and plan accordingly to their schedule, or see if our partner’s place will be more suitable for sexy times. With so many publicly shared things and places at college, it’s important to note that getting hot and heavy with our honey should only happen in places where everyone in the room is consenting to it. Making sure we’re not surprising our custodians, roommates and fellow library goers is a must. Reimagining our sex lives with the addition of roommates being within earshot doesn’t have to be a struggle— as it turns out, being considerate just might make Fall 2k15 our sexiest semester yet. Turning down the volume on a night (or afternoon, or morning) in with schnookums might sound like a bummer at first, but let’s step back and ponder this opportunity... As fun as it may be loudly letting our partner know how hot they’ve got us, trying not to make a sound while being pleasured can create a new and oh-so-steamy internal struggle. As they push all the right buttons we may find it harder and harder (hehe) to keep

our moans and groans at low levels. Getting to a point where we just can’t take it anymore is hella hot and will give us all the more motivation to turn the tables and have a little fun of our own. The only thing sexier than trying to contain ourselves is knowing our partners have to stay quiet no matter how sweet our lovemaking is. This playful back and forth can create a healthy competition that will elevate our playtime and get us über turned on. Sex is by no means a competition, but working together to exchange as many good vibes as possible feels a whole lot like winning. For example, if we were going down on a lil’ cutie with a vulva (the external genitalia that we commonly hear referred to as a “vagina”) we can try tracing the ABCs with our tongues and seeing what elicits the best reaction. This is an especially fun experiment when we’re keeping our volume in mind because the more we hit that sweet spot the harder it’s going to be for our partner not to shout praises to the rooftops— can I get a halleloo?? Using the ABC trick while performing oral sex

on a vulva is a great example of experimenting with different sensations, but it is most definitely NOT the end all be all. The general strategy of trying out different motions/actions and seeing what works best for our partner is a super reliable and applicable strategy for whatever area of our partner’s bodies we’re attempting to invigorate.

The only thing sexier than trying to contain ourselves is knowing our partners have to stay quiet no matter how sweet our love making is.

The best part about using quietness to get kinky is that it only gets better with time. The more we know our partner’s bodies the more adventurous we can get during playtime. Having a mental treasure map to the “golden” spots allows for incorporating teasing and changing intensities based on prior feedback. Consider starting slow and working up to the

area/sensation we know works best or alternating high-intensity sensations with lower-level sensations. When we have a great working knowledge of what trips our tiger’s trigger we can decide to dive right into the honey pot or hold back and make ’em wait for it. Recap: 1. Living so close to other people can be tricky for many reasons, but especially when it comes to Marvin Gaye and getting it on—don’t be intimidated by the lack of privacy. 2. Make sure we either have the room to ourselves or our roomie is a willing third to whatever’s on the sexual docket for the evening. 3. Pull out every wellreceived sexual favor we’ve ever gifted and experiment with variations of it to discover new realms of tingly goodness and turn partners to putty. 4. All this silent sexiness is sure to work up an appetite so go get some Pizza Di Roma or something. Wondering which of your Tinder pictures sends the best “quirky but still hot” vibe? Send your sexy questions and queries to sex@dailycardinal.com.

news

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Tuesday, September 15, 2015

UW, City of Madison receive grant to expand high-speed broadband networking

courtesy of david tenenbaum via uw-madison

UW-Madison Chemistry professor Song Jin and his research team discovered a cheaper, more environmentally friendly hydrogen catalyst.

hydrogen from page 1 almost as efficient as platinum and may be the highest performing non-noble metal catalyst available today, according to the release. Jin’s lab discoveries didn’t stop there. “If you want to make a dent in the global warming problem, you have to think big,” Jin said in the release. In addition to being easier on budgets, the lab also started performing the hydrogen reaction in a way that is easier on the environment. Previous experiments relied on putting electricity in to get hydrogen out, which may seem counter-

intuitive, considering the reaction is meant to reduce reliance on traditional energy sources. Jin’s new catalyst can create a reaction using power from the sun, making it possible to scale up and carry out for generations. “Whether we imagine making hydrogen from electricity, or directly from sunlight, we need square miles of devices to evolve that much hydrogen,” Jin said in the release. “And there might not be enough platinum to do that.” Although this new catalyst has only been tested in a lab, the release states Jin has already obtained a provisional patent from the Wisconsin Alumni Research Foundation and said he hopes to keep learning more.

The City of Madison and UW-Madison received a grant through the National Science Foundation Monday to expand broadband networking and Internet applications for cities. The $6 million grant, which was awarded to 15 cities, is part of a federal government “Smart Cities” initiative aimed at improving city services through technology-based approaches. “This NSF grant will help advance efforts in high bandwidth applications, develop new technologies and better serve citizens and the technical community,” Paul Kronberger, chief information officer for the City of Madison, said

in a Monday statement, emphasizing public-private partnership as an important part of the initiative. Bruce Maas, UW-Madison vice provost for information technology and chief information officer, worked with computer sciences professor Suman Banerjee to apply for the grant. Banerjee’s work focused on improving applications for transit services through the Wisconsin and Madison Metro apps. “Madison is recognized as one of the leading cities where the private sector, university and city come together in partnership to create opportunities that benefit all parties and our citizens,” Maas said in a

Wisconsin Republicans push for change in superintendent selection process State Rep. Joe Sanfelippo, R-New Berlin, introduced a proposal Monday that would enable Gov. Scott Walker to appoint the superintendent of the Wisconsin Department of Public Instruction with consent of the state Senate. Current superintendent Tony Evers, one of the only Democrats to have a statewide office, entered his position through an election of Wisconsin voters, but Sanfelippo asserted in his proposal that the process should change. “[This procedure] needs to be improved and the only way

we can do that is by holding DPI more accountable, and with an appointed superintendent, we can do exactly that,” Sanfelippo said. According to the New Berlin Republican, Wisconsin is one of only 12 states in the country that elects its head of public schools on partisan or nonpartisan ballots, which Sanfelippo has said is one of the driving forces of the movement. Despite a powerful Republican push, many have opposed the recent proposal. State Rep. Sondy Pope, D-Cross

SSFC members approve two-year funding for Greater University Tuition Service By Ellie Herman the Daily Cardinal

The Associated Students of Madison Student Services Finance Committee kicked off their second meeting of the semester Monday by reaccepting the Greater University Tutoring Service into General Student Services Fund. Fifteen UW-Madison students compose SSFC, who work to distribute $45 million in the GSSF for campus groups. SSFC members have the authority to suggest raising, lowering or freezing GSSF funding to UW-Madison administration and the Board of Regents. The money that goes toward supporting student groups is a part of the GSSF, and groups that receive this money are typically known as “GSSF Groups.” These groups must reapply to maintain their part in the fund every two academic years. GUTS directors Katherine Hayden and Andrew Mangham shared with committee members at its Sept. 10 meeting how its free tutorial assistance encourages students’ personal and academic growth. “I’m very happy that we’re entered because I think that all the student orgs that are funded by SSFC do very valued things,” Mangham said. “I think GUTS offers an extremely valuable service on campus, and is

one of the best examples of what student orgs can be and what student orgs can do for themselves.” GUTS began in 1974 and aids about 3,000 students per year in academics, a third of which are freshmen. Mangham attended Monday’s meeting on behalf of the organization, where GUTS’ application for reentry into the GSSF for the next academic year was accepted with 11 voting in favor and one abstention. Sex Out Loud also reapplied for admittance into the GSSF. Sex Out Loud member Nicholas Fetzner said the group’s current mission is to promote healthy sexuality through sex-positive education and activism. The organization supports peer-topeer teaching, and only receives funding through the GSSF, a major eligibility factor all applicants must follow. SSFC members will vote on Sex Out Loud’s application and announce their decision at Thursday’s meeting. Before adjourning the meeting, SSFC Chair Thuy Pham discussed the idea of possibly making GUTS part of an ancillary fund in the future, which was created in 2007 to address groups that are not perfectly categorized as a GSSF group or non-allocable fund group. While GUTS will currently be considered a GSSF group, its poten-

hannah bunting/the daily cardinal

Student Services Finance Committee Chair Thuy Pham shared the results of GUTS’ application to be included in the GSSF. tial placement as an ancillary fund group would give it a three year budget contract with SSFC, compared to GSSF groups, which are set at two. Pham specified that this is an ongoing conversation to pick up throughout the semester, suggesting a special task force could be created to address the change. “Before we go to a small, special

sub-group, we should at least have a full committee discussion, where we all know what we’re talking about,” SSFC Rep. Todd Garon said. Garon reminded committee members that making GUTS an ancillary group would have to be run past Student Council as well, though noted the added people could lengthen the conversation.

Second sexual assault from Saturday reported in university residence halls The second sexual assault of this weekend, and the third of the semester, was reported to the UW-Madison Police

Department Monday, according to a UWPD crime warning sent to all students. The reported assault occurred

Monday statement. The grant will help fund projects to help city services work well in real time, according to Brian Rust, communications director for DoIT. “With this grant, Banerjee will be able to work on projects that track real-time data for ambulances and smart cars,” Rust said. The three-year project includes plans to build a lab for applications so that the 15 cities will be able to share resources to use for their cities’ specific broadband needs. US Ignite, a nonprofit which has organized tech-related projects for the last three years, will help to administer the grant. — Negassi Tesfamichael

early Saturday morning in a university residence hall, according to the report, and the individuals involved knew each other.

UWPD sent the warning in compliance with the Clery Act in an effort to keep the UW-Madison community informed.

Plains, released a statement arguing against the motion. “Wisconsin has been renowned for some of the highest performing public schools in the nation,” Pope said in the statement. “Sanfelippo’s resolution seeks to undermine that history in an effort to score political points to the detriment of our state’s students.” In order for the proposal to pass, it must be adopted by two successive legislatures, and will also need to be ratified by voters in a referendum. —Matthew Tragesser

restaurant from page 1 are currently also owners of Roast Public House, a sandwich shop which opened in 2012 on the 500 block of State Street. Keeping their latest business venture close to campus was a goal for Hamaker. “That corner is the corner of campus because it is the division between State Street life and campus life,” Hamaker explained. “This is a very vibrant corner, and Forage will be able to deliver fast, fresh, healthoriented meals.” The establishment is scheduled to open Oct. 5, though construction delays could postpone the opening day. Forage Kitchen will replace the former site of College Barber Shop, which closed in 2014 after being in business for 86 years. The 7-Eleven convenience store, which will open next door at the former site of State & Lake Clothing Co., will be open 24/7 for consumers to get a variety of services and food, according to an application sent to the Alcohol License Review Committee. James Fiene, with 30-years of convenience store experience, will run the store. The committee will hold a public hearing on the license, as well as alcohol licenses for three other 7-Eleven stores around Madison, this Wednesday.

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Tuesday, September 15, 2015

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Syria’s refugees seeking hope in Europe Hae rin Lee Opinion Columnist

he crisis of Syrian migrants is one of the hottest potatoes in the media bucket today throughout the world. We wonder and worry about this particular phenomenon—what could be the outcome of this exodus? What forced these civilians to roam so far? Is there anything we can do for them? How should we handle the situation? The war in Syria originated from the protest against the dictatorial Assad regime in the form of civil war. With the introduction of the Islamic State, however, a newfound religious conflict has continued to push many civilians to flee their homelands. Based on the logic of distance decay in the study of immigration, many immigrants choose to flee to the safest havens that are closest to their borders, based on the cost and affordability. Today, what we see on the news is the opposite of that; we see refugees seeking shelter in Europe, as far north as Scandinavia, putting that theory to the test. So why not seek help from their neighboring nations?

Some worry that the further introduction of culturally distant Muslim populations could cause cultural instability and unrest.

The reports revealed that most countries in the Middle East are saturated from the overwhelming number of refugees to take in more. While there are several factors and facets involved in calculating just how many refugees a country can take in, the biggest one is money. According to CNN Money report, Lebanon, one of the neighboring countries to Syria, spends 4.5 billion dollars annually to manage their refugee population of 1.43 mil-

Courtesy of John Sutton via creative commons

Cambridge townsfolk gather in welcoming Syrian and other Middle Eastern refugees, to show their disapproval toward the British Government’s response to the current refugee crisis. lion. Other countries expressed similar economic restraints in helping Syrian refugees. It is not that they are less sympathetic to the hardships of refugees, but rather the financial burdens are preventing them from contributing further to the effort. After all, it is a pretty heavy burden to take on a bunch of freeloaders with no trade skills, right? In contrast to the popular belief that the majority of immigrants and asylum seekers are of limited education seeking job opportunities, most Syrian migrants today are from the middle class. Immigrating long distances generally involves people with considerable wealth who can afford the cost of travel. The International Business Times said, “Recent figures from the U.N. and other aid organizations, however, have shown that the majority of people arriving in Europe often come from upper middle class, well-educated backgrounds.” This hints at another set of troubles to the future of Syria, in that it is experiencing a severe case of brain drain, or the

emigration of highly trained or intelligent people from a country. The major trouble of this trend is that it will increase the time it takes to repair a broken country, dragging down the rate of recovery and development. There also will be fewer people left to mitigate the worsening conditions from the atrocities committed at home, and be able to some day to return to a sense of normalcy, or a place without violence and death that can one day be called home by these people.

Many of us are the immigrants, and would have been considerably strange and dangerous to the already existing culture of the land.

Now it is quite clear that the refugee crisis of Syria is a serious issue that requires help from many others around the globe, since they can’t solve it on their own. But there seems to be a lot

of concerns over what impact this flight would bring upon other nations. Some worry that the further introduction of culturally distant Muslim populations could cause cultural instability and unrest. Europe is suffering from the negativity of immigration as the diversification of populations bring misunderstandings and social confusion– they worry about the increasing nationalism of Muslims that develop into terrorisms like the incident at Charlie Hebdo. Xenophobia is an unfortunately common, knee-jerk state of mind in response to the introduction of two cultures unfamiliar to one another, but it should not be used as a justification to reject those who are in need of help. The fact that the majority of Syrian refugees are professionally trained and educated may prove to be a positive asset. They could contribute to the saturated economy over the continent with their potential for success, despite the serious issues surrounding immigration. There will be many costs to the management of refugees,

but harmony will never come unless we fight for it. I think it is less beneficial to the whole to predetermine the possibilities of a better future based entirely on the past without at least giving it an honest try. The Syrian exodus, in my opinion, is a natural phenomenon we have seen repeated before in history. European Jews escaped to America from Hitler and his holocaust, and Asian immigrants left their homelands to yield affluence in America, during the 19th century. Relatively speaking, it is difficult to ascertain just who exactly is a ‘native’ to any one land or geographical area. Many of us are the immigrants, and would have been considerably strange and dangerous to the already existing culture of the land. Yet, we all prevailed to achieve a remarkable record of moving forward together that we can be proud of despite all the challenge sand hardships we all endured and still encounter to this day. And, I believe we can achieve another victory in the same manner, this time with the refugees of Syria.

So why not seek help from their neighboring nations?

Should we give up the climb of the mountain of life, and not get the opportunity to see the sunset over everything we have succeeded over? Mankind has lived through a history of endless persecutions, fights, and struggles. Today is another page of the history book that is constantly being written; by looking forward instead of backward, we can continue the track of progress. Do you agree with Hae Rin’s views on the current refugee crisis in Syria and elsewhere? Please send all comments to opinion@dailycardinal.com.

Let our student leaders pave the way in personal growth Sergey Fedossov Opinion Editor

o label Wisconsin as anything other than a party school is considered a slight to most Badgers. A year after taking my nervous first steps onto this campus, I’m still trying to wrap my head around how, in all my hours of research and determination on what university would be my home for the next four years, I skipped over this glaring detail. I got caught up in the trees of fantastic programs such as student research, Badger athletic programs, and the Wisconsin Idea, that I failed to notice the actual forest of student life on campus. Within this year, I continue to struggle reconciling my perceived image of Wisconsin and what it actually wound up

being like, as well as reconciling scholastics and the heavy social aspect on here on campus.

What does it look like when an athlete has a drinking ticket and is allowed to stay on their team with little to no repercussions?

Plenty of people call Wisconsin a “work hard, play hard” type of school. To ignore the obvious connotations of drinking that statement carries with it is folly. However, the faces of our administration like to maintain a public stance of blissful ignorance to the fact that alcohol is so prevalent on our campus. Very rarely, if ever have I felt that the topics of underage drinking tickets, trips to detox, how many sexual assaults

involve alcohol, and more, have been addressed with any substance or chutzpah. While press conferences from the top down would help set goals and directions for our student body, a grassroots movement could provide students the level of involvement that is difficult to see when looking at the chancellor or the Board of Regents. Wisconsin’s foremost student ambassadors are its athletes, student leadership and employees, and it’s high time for them to take responsibility for reflecting well upon our school and the student body as a whole. They are the bridge between the suits, the educational institution, and those who learn from it. What does it look like when an athlete has a drinking ticket and is allowed to stay on their team with little to no repercussions? How is the image of the average Wisconsin student affected when a sexual assault

or other scandal is committed by someone we thought we could trust to represent the Badgers? Regardless of who does it, every one of these incidents detracts from our image as a whole; when executed by those we have chosen to represent our school, everyone’s image suffers.

Plenty of people call Wisconsin a “work hard, play hard” type of school.

I wouldn’t dream of enacting some kind of nightmarish vision of Puritan moral values and have our athletes act as some kind of puppets to preach to our students on the importance of abstaining from alcohol and other unsavory behaviors. What we need is for the men

and women who represent us on the field, in the media and behind the scenes to hold themselves to a higher standard. We must strike a balance between being tolerant of the urges to have (too) good of a time going out on a weekend night with that of proving that our athletes are professionals, and integral pillars of moral values to our student community. When our athletes, ASM representatives, student workers, and everyone else that wears the Motion W as a representative of this school polices themselves and how they act, their behavior unifies the campus by looking towards the example set by them. A rising tide lifts all ships, and in the moralistic aspect, let these ambassadors to the university be our vessels. Sergey is an sophomore majoring in international studies and economics. Please send all questions and comments to opinion@dailycardinal.com.

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Tuesday, September 15, 2015 • 5

Hiding smoke detector from Nag Champa. Today’s Sudoku

Future Freaks

A Tad Offbeat Fill in the grid so that every row, every column and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9.

Today’s Crossword Puzzle

ACROSS 1 Like a recluse 5 Master, in Kolkata 10 “Are you kidding?” 14 Opera solo 15 “... the ___ of defeat” 16 Will’s beneficiary 17 Brezhnev’s domain 18 Party memento 19 Alleviate 20 Perform without assistance 23 Thumb-twiddler 24 Suffers after exercise 25 Barely sufficient 28 Allocate (with “out”) 30 Great in length 31 Mirror’s reflection 33 “Anytown, ___” 36 Where to go round in circles? 4 0 Stuck vehicle’s need 41 Political get-together 42 Bit of instruction 43 German chancellor Helmut 4 4 Gives permission 46 Assassinated 49 Out on the waves 51 What hunters have?

By Joel Cryer graphics@dailycardinal.com

57 “Wall” or “mobile” follower 58 Funny bone’s nerve 59 Twofold in nature 6 0 Jean label name 61 Elegant headdress 62 “Cogito, ___ sum” 63 Femur and tibia connector 6 4 Insolent 65 Musical interval DOWN 1 Praise highly 2 Guesstimate phrase 3 Unless, in court 4 Tax-return figure 5 Without danger 6 Slack-jawed 7 Float in the air 8 Knowing, as a secret 9 Polar explorer 10 From what place or origin 11 Tract of wasteland 12 Church’s walkway 13 Low-value playing cards 21 Banned insecticide 22 Lotus-___ (stargazer)

25 Thin, narrow opening 26 First name in fragrance 27 With a fresh start 28 Quite a few 29 Cadbury confection 31 “___ have to do for now” 32 “Cool” amount 33 “Do ___ others ...” 34 Slant unfairly 35 Some poisonous snakes 37 Danish currency 38 “How relaxing!” 39 Fijian, for one 43 Highlander, e.g. 44 Off course 45 Luau garland 46 Cower in the shadows 47 Closet material, sometimes 48 Wanted poster word of old 49 Kournikova and Nicole Smith 50 They had great power in Russia 52 Wheel tracks 53 Olympic skater Kulik 54 Smoke, as a ham 55 Merchandise attachments 56 Hole for a coin

By Alexandra Steffeck graphics@dailycardinal.com

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Tuesday, September 15, 2015

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Aquilino, Zigrino set to electrify Union By Conor Murphy The Daily Cardinal

Carly Aquilino’s first time on stage was short-lived: at her first ballet recital, when the curtains rose, Aquilino promptly jumped off stage. When her mother asked why, she said that she didn’t want people to look at her. “It’s kind of ironic now that that’s what I do,” Aquilino said, referring to her current job as one of the many women on MTV’s “Girl Code.” While she remembers the former torment of stage fright, Aquilino is a confident, cheeky performer who will take the stage at the Wisconsin Union Wednesday. Jenny Zigrino, a comic from Los Angeles, by way of Minnesota, will join Aquilino at the performance. Zigrino, the daughter of a wannabe Russian actress, has been performing on and off over the last 12 years. After seeing her first comedy show at 15, Zigrino knew she had found her calling. “I watched a few specials… and

I fell in love,” Zigrino said. This will be the first time Aquilino performs in Madison, and Zigrino is returning after a performance in Madison last June. While Zigrino was studying at art school in Boston, Aquilino got her cosmetology license—Aquilino said that this continued her track record of crazy hair styles and colors. Aquilino worked at a salon throughout the first two seasons of “Girl Code,” a decision she affirms to this day as a good idea. “I knew the show was really successful, but I didn’t want to stop working,” Aquilino said. “I was really paranoid about it, but I kept my job. People would come in and say, ‘are you on TV?’” Unlike her fellow comedian, Zigrino said, speaking from her own experience, “don’t have a plan B” when going into comedy. “If you’re going to do this, do it 100 percent. You’re going to sacrifice a lot of parties… and it’s going to feel lonely at times, but if you

photo courtesy of gersh comedy

Originally from Minnesota, Jenny Zigrino started performing at clubs around Boston while attending college before moving out west.

really want it, you’ll do it.” Since their early days in comedy, both have hit their stride. Zigrino recently recorded her first comedy album at Comedy on State, a June 2015 comedy festival in Madison, Wis. While she’s excited to take a break for a bit, Zigrino said that the one hour special was a compilation of over seven years of material. Aquilino is now in her fourth season of MTV’s “Girl Code,” and recently helped host the VMA pre-coverage for MTV. She also is working on “Girl Code Live,” a more improvisational take on the original show. Aquilino went into great detail about the writing process for “Girl Code,” including that she usually writes about half of her material for the set topics before and leaves the rest to the heat of the moment. Both Aquilino and Zigrino noted that there’s some leg work that comedians must do when preparing for performing at either a college campus or at a club. “On one hand, yeah, I do think that college students can be a little too sensitive, and I’m 28, so I get it,” Zigrino said. While she doesn’t mind tweaking her set to certain specifications, Zigrino continued, “As you get older, you get beaten down by the world, so you just don’t care any more.” Aquilino did give pause and note that because of the contrast in atmosphere, it should be expected that certain audiences will take the material differently. “I don’t change my material for college,” Aquilino said. “I think everyone going to the show is to see your stand-up, [and] if someone doesn’t like it, comedy is subjective. Not everyone is going to like the same things.” Aquilino gave some advice for aspiring comics: get experience. “It’s definitely nerve-racking at first, and it’ll be a lot of failing before you succeed,” Aquilino said. “Anytime that you bomb you’ll get better…. Everyone at open mic is a beginner… don’t be afraid or

photo courtesy of converge media group

Carly Aquilino got her start in stand-up comedy four years ago and has found a home on MTV’s “Girl Code,” which is in its fourth season. ashamed, ‘cause everyone else is in their own head as well.” When talking about how her comedy is a form of therapy for her body issues, Zigrino tore into Nicole Arbour, a YouTube personality who recently posted a widely panned video titled “Dear Fat People.” The video consisted of Arbour attempting to fat-shame overweight and obese people into losing weight, and has since been removed from YouTube. Zigrino noted that some of Arbour’s supporters have claimed that Arbour is being censored for her views, which Zigrino said was smoke and mirrors. “That’s fine, freedom of speech, they can do whatever they want. But as a public figure you should say good things, be an empowering

person instead of [tearing] people down,” Zigrino said. Calling her a hack, and that she would face a tough crowd at any comedy club, Zigrino faulted Arbour for using YouTube as her primary platform for her form of comedy. “I feel like with YouTube she was able to sidestep the actual stand-up comedian… world that I exist in and goes into this quick rise to game,” Zigrino said. “You still need to be funny to be called a comedian.” Luckily, Zigrino and Aquilino both possess that innate ability to light up a room, and will undoubtedly electrify the Union We. Jenny Zigrino and Carly Aquilino will perform at the Wisconsin Union Theater Wednesday at 8:00 p.m. Tickets are $10 for students and are still available.

When life hands you a platter of despair, laugh in its face Maham Hasan lit columnist The world around us would be even more bleak without the presence and occurrence of rhythmic, vocalized, expiratory and involuntary actions, such as laughter. But why? Laughter does not necessarily mean that you’re happy, or even content. Perhaps that’s exactly why. Even in the deep pit of absolute misery, we can laugh with reckless abandon. We have such an ability to laugh, even if we may not always be cognizant of its existence. Some of the best laughs I’ve had have been in moments when life has pummeled me black and blue into a bloody mess of despair. That’s when you sometimes need to laugh the hardest to acknowledge that nothing at the end of the day seems quite so apocalyptic if you can simply laugh at it. Far be it from me to bring upon thoughts of discontent and conflict in your soul each

week, so I have reasons for you to laugh in this one. Knowing, and actually acknowledging, that everyone around is so much more than they first appear to be are two concepts that are too far apart. Such is the place Ali Smith attempts to draw us in with her satirical book, “There but for the.” She succeeds in exploring the inexplicable human need to connect with others on a night when a houseguest locks himself in the guest room at a party. Stringing together moments of laughter that sneak up on you, and a wicked wit, this book offers an oddly appealing combination of depth and humor. If for nothing else, it is worth reading for the following little gem: “ABBA songs, as anyone who knows knows, are constructed, technically and harmonically, so as to physically imprint the human brain as if biting it with acid, to ensure we will never, ever, ever, be able to forget them.” Described as the “visionary we need and the satirist we deserve,” the author of the unparalleled “Fight Club” shows

off his humor chops in “Choke.” Chuck Palahniuk is perhaps the only genius the term scatalogical does absolute justice to, seeing as I had to look the word up—you should as well but I digress. A nihilist and narcissist to a fault, Palahniuk takes great delight in being hated and any shred of negativity from the world only fuels his furor of amusement. And bless him, he always allows this to bleed into his writing. In Victor Mancini he seems to have found a protagonist a tad more disgusting than Tyler Durden, if it were even possible, and I like to think he takes maniacal pleasure in allowing us to enjoy him anyway. An unlovable loser who sometimes is no better than the dregs of gutter, you end up liking him and the book because you’re almost begged to hate it. Reading this book is like having Palahniuk shove his entire fist down your throat as he picks apart aging, death, insanity, anarchy and our deep seated need to be a savior, all while never losing even a modicum of his humor as apparent by this

line: “My first time I jacked off, I thought I’d invented it. I looked down at my sloppy handful of junk and thought, this is going to make me rich.” Ignatius J. Reilly is a character that won author John Kennedy Toole a Pulitzer for the masterful way he was crafted in “A Confederacy of Dunces.” It’s the comical legacy left behind Toole, who committed suicide before he could ever see the publication of his novel or what it would come to mean in the 20th century. As humanity has a darkly humorous streak of honoring those that most craved it for their talent only after they take their lives, it is no less fitting that Toole would be given such an accolade and memorial for the tormented life that he lived. But obviously only after he died, so that he can bask in it all the more from the cloudy heavens or the fiery pits—you be the judge. Hailed again and again as a modern day Quixote, Reilly is as comedic in his tragedy as he is selfish and full of delusions. A compulsive liar to a fault, everything in his life is stretched to grandiose proportions

and utter buffoonery. But damn it if walking through the screamingly obnoxious episodes of his life, in search of a real job as he suffers through one mishap after another, does not have you laughing out loud. As in awe of his God-like attributes as he is self deprecating, Reilly is truly something else: “I suspect that I am the result of particularly weak conception on the part of my father. His sperm was probably emitted in a rather offhand manner.” The world and people in it will fail you constantly, repeatedly and spectacularly. The only times they do not is when we can count on them to be a source of despair. It is a bleak view, but it is also a redeeming one. Bear with me, because if we can still live, still love and, most importantly, still laugh in the face of that it means that we still have hope. Being able to laugh through any tragedy that life throws at us, buries us under, is one such face of hope. What book has helped you laugh through a rough time? Can you find humor in sadness or despair? Email Maham at mhasan4@wisc.edu.

sports dailycardinal.com

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

UW Athletics Hall of Fame

Harris, Leonhard paved way to success By Jake Powers The Daily Cardinal

With 0.4 seconds left on the clock and the regular-season finale with Illinois tied at 59, Devin Harris stepped up to the free throw line at the Kohl Center and buried his foul shot, giving Wisconsin the 2002-’03 Big Ten Championship. A few months earlier, in late November of 2002, Jim Leonhard snagged two interceptions against Minnesota, earning Wisconsin a 49-31 victory, bowl eligibility and returning Paul Bunyan’s Axe to Madison. Both Harris and Leonhard left a deep mark on their respective teams, as they were integral parts of a transition period between mediocrity and dominance for both the basketball and football programs. Their contributions earned them a very deserved invitation to the UW Athletic Hall of Fame induction last Friday, Sept. 11 at Union South. “The fact that we took the program from kind of an unknown and made it—built a foundation to make it a powerhouse,” Harris said of his contributions as a Badger. “Just the success we had early on, winning the conference championships, making it to the Sweet 16, things that we haven’t done in a while. I hang my head on a lot of that.” Leonhard’s reflection on his time in Madison is understandably, if not eerily, similar.

“The first couple years were not as successful as we wanted them to be,” Leonhard said. “To finish it in 2004 the way we did, kind of lay the foundation and get nine wins. There hasn’t been very many years after that where they haven’t had nine wins, so to see where this program’s went in the last 10 years, it’s meant a lot to me and my teammates.” Harris came to Madison two years after head coach Dick Bennett took UW to the Final Four, which was an astounding accomplishment for a team that consistently strayed toward the mean. Another newcomer to the Kohl Center in fall 2001 was head coach Bo Ryan, a man who would shape Harris’ life over the next three seasons. “I think the work ethic I learned here and the little teachings I’ve had from coach Ryan have allowed me to prolong my career,” Harris said. “I’m still playing today, I think he has a lot to do with that.” Harris, who started in all 96 games of his Wisconsin career, carried the Badgers to three consecutive NCAA Tournament appearances, including the Sweet 16 in the 2002-’03 season. Leonhard’s value in Badger history is similar. After making the team as a walk-on in 2001, the safety quickly became the keystone of a Wisconsin defense that allowed just over 22 points per game during his

betsy osterberger/cardinal file photo

Athletic Director Barry Alvarez began the UW Athletics Hall of Fame induction ceremony last Friday at Union South by saying, “This is your night, let’s all have a lot of fun and celebrate.” tenure. He fell in love with Madison during his college years, and his roots have been planted in the city despite playing for five different franchises over his 10-year NFL career. “We looked around, I’ve been fortunate to live in a lot of different cities, but there was nothing like this,” Leonhard said. “Just the energy in this city on a day-to-day basis, whether there’s anything happen-

ing or not, whether there’s a big event or it’s just another Thursday or Friday. The energy in this city is amazing with the university and it’s infectious. It’s something you don’t ever want to leave.” In 2004, his senior season, Leonhard helped the Badgers to their first nine-win year since the start of the decade, and Wisconsin has now registered nine wins in

eight of the 10 seasons since then. Harris and Leonhard’s additions are important precursors to the success of the basketball and football programs today. The modern Wisconsin student may not realize it, but an era of the very average existed not that long ago. Harris and Leonhard are two key figures they have to thank for that break in history.

Press Conference

Volleyball, football both hitting stride after season openers By Ethan Levy The Daily Cardinal

Volleyball

The Badgers (6-1) had a successful weekend in the annual Badger Classic tournament, sweeping both Georgia (4-5) and Kent State (5-4) in three straight sets. After the tournament, head coach Kelly Sheffield was happy with his team’s continued progress week-to-week. “It’s a weekend where we feel like we played a little bit better than the

previous weekend,” Sheffield said. Individually, Sheffield was particularly impressed with the play of sophomore outside hitter Kelli Bates and junior middle back Haleigh Nelson. “I thought both of them offensively took the next step,” Sheffield said. “I think both of them, behind the service line, put a lot of pressure on our opponent, and that is certainly good to see.” Regarding Bates, Sheffield continued to praise her improvement.

“Her ball control is really good, and her backcourt has gotten a lot better,” Sheffield said. “She is not somebody I worry about at all—she is locked in” More importantly, as a unit, Sheffield feels that he continues to learn a little bit more about his team as the season progresses. “Maybe, just maybe, we may end up being an okay blocking team, and maybe, just maybe, our transition attack might end up being pretty good,” Sheffield said. “Those are

things we are working on that were pretty much nonexistent in the first couple weeks.” Still, going into their matches against Kansas State (8-1), Creighton (4-5) and Arkansas (8-1) this weekend, there are still some unanswered questions in the Badger lineup. Wisconsin does not have a day-in, day-out starter at some of their positions. Junior Tori Blake and freshman Tionna Williams are fighting for playing time at middle back and freshman Madison Duello and redshirt junior Romana Kriskova are facing the same competition at right side hitter. “We’re going to let them battle,” Sheffield said. “We just need time together.”

Football

Grey Satterfield/Cardinal File Photo

After losing to Western Kentucky Aug. 28 in Madison, head coach Kelly Sheffield has led Wisconsin to six consecutive victories, including wins over Georgia and Kent State late last week.

After the Badgers’ (1-1) decisive 58-0 win in Week 2 of the college football season against Miami (OH), head coach Paul Chryst is making sure his team is still focused on improving in the week of practice leading up to their matchup against Troy (1-1) at Camp Randall Stadium Saturday. “I think there is a ton we can get better at,” Chryst said. “You try to focus on the things you can control— and that is your own preparation.” Offensively, the Badgers are working on solidifying their continuously changing offensive line. Redshirt junior Walker Williams has to adjust quickly to his new role, as he is now responsible for filling in at both guard and tackle. Chryst also feels that redshirt freshman Micah

Kapoi, redshirt freshman Michael Deiter and redshirt sophomore Hayden Biegel all need more snaps on the right side of the line to create consistent protection. Still, Chryst is excited about the play of his deep-receiving corps. “Every guy earns their opportunities,” Chryst said. “Our players want to get better.” Junior wide receiver Robert Wheelwright and redshirt senior tight end Austin Traylor, who caught 100 balls each day during the offseason, have both shown improvement and have been more involved since the start of the season. Chryst is also looking forward to getting redshirt sophomore tight end Troy Fumagalli back on the field after he sat out last week’s game with an ankle injury. Defensively, however, Chryst still has some questions to answer, despite his team’s recent shutout. Chryst is excited about redshirt senior safety and wide receiver Tanner McEvoy’s athletic ability, but still does not know how he will hold up playing a full game on both sides of the ball. McEvoy played 73 snaps against Miami, but did not play much in the fourth quarter. “He is a pretty unique athlete,” Chryst said. “But we don’t have an accurate gauge yet.” The Badgers look to correct these concerns in the week ahead, and come out with an even stronger effort this weekend. “Every game is a unique opportunity,” Chryst said. “You have to be the best team in the stadium that day.”

JESSIE VETTER

J.J. WATT

OLYMPIAN, SILVER MEDALIST

NFL DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE YEAR

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