Monday, November 10, 2008 - The Daily Cardinal by The Daily Cardinal

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Environmental activist pushes nuclear energy By Cathy Martin THE DAILY CARDINAL

Self-proclaimed “sensible environmentalist” Patrick Moore opened the UW Energy Hub Conference Friday by advocating nuclear energy, calling it the most effective way of reducing carbon emissions and consumption of fossil fuels. Although he was a founding member of Greenpeace, Moore left the organization, feeling his colleagues created policies based on sensation rather than science. He is now a co-chair of the Clean and Safe Energy Coalition, a pro-nuclear energy association. “Nuclear energy is one of the most important, beneficial energy technologies for the future of this world, and we need to go down that road,” Moore said. With a nuclear moratorium up for repeal in Wisconsin in January 2009, Moore said the state government needs to remove

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Monday, November 10, 2008

Headdressed to impress

“the barrier to nuclear energy which has been erected here.” Moore used France as an example of the potential success of a nuclear-energy industry. “Nuclear energy is one of the most important, beneﬁcial energy technologies for the future of this world.” Patrick Moore co-chair Clean and Safe Energy Coalition

“France produces 80 percent of its electricity with nuclear power. [It is] clean, cost-effective and safe,” Moore said. He said wind and solar power are unrealistic long-term solutions, as they are expensive and unreliable. “You cannot run hospitals … moore page 3

Lawton outlines state’s goals to promote renewable energy Lt. Gov. Barbara Lawton spoke about Wisconsin’s role in preserving the environment and growing the renewable energy industry Friday at the UW Energy Hub Conference. As a keynote speaker, Lawton said Wisconsin has a collective set of moral principals toward the environment and a history of environmental protection, citing former Wisconsin Gov. Gaylord Nelson,

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who founded Earth Day, and John Muir, founder of the Sierra Club. She said the state is taking several steps toward renewable energy, including research and new innovative practices. According to Lawton, Wisconsin is one of the United States’ leading ethanol producers and leads the country in production of lawton page 3

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Participants in traditional Native American garb join in the Honoring Our Veterans Pow-Wow at Memorial Union Sunday. Wunk Sheek, the UW-Madison Native American student organization, organized the event.

County 911 center admits errors in handling calls before homicide By Abby Sears THE DAILY CARDINAL

In a report released Friday, Dane County officials acknowledged that errors occurred at the 911 Center when handling calls before a Nov. 3 death, the second time this year the center committed a fault related to a Madison homicide. The investigative report from Dane County Public Safety Communications said the 911 Center made three errors before Mark Gregory Johnson, 37, was found dead in Lake Edge Park on Madison’s east side last week. The center failed to dispatch police after receiving two calls about a noise disturbance in the park that led to a fight and

Johnson being beaten to death. The 911 Center also came under fire after the April 2 homicide of UW-Madison junior Brittany Zimmermann, when then-911 Center Director Joe Norwick admitted that a dispatcher made an error by not returning a call made from Zimmermann’s cell phone or sending police FALK the day of her death. In a memo sent to Public Safety Communications Center Interim Director Kathy Krusiec, Dane County Executive Kathleen

Falk said one of the biggest issues facing the 911 Center is properly dispatching the 85 police, fire and medical emergency services throughout the county. “I am concerned that communicators’ need to continually weigh these different rules sometimes hinders their ability to make ... timely decisions.” Kathleen Falk county executive Dane County

“While we rightly strive to offer service tailored to each 911 page 3

SigEp members bike to Indiana to raise money for hospital By Alyssa Connolly THE DAILY CARDINAL

ALYSSA CONNOLLY/THE DAILY CARDINAL

Lt. Gov. Barbara Lawton spoke about Wisconsin’s role in the emerging renewable-energy economy at the UW Energy Hub Conference Friday.

Members of the Sigma Phi Epsilon fraternity biked 412 miles to Bloomington, Ind., this weekend to raise money for the American Family Children’s Hospital in their 17th annual Tour de Touchdown. Bikers carried a replica of the football used in Saturday’s game against Indiana University on the trip. Badger football head coach Bret Bielema signed the replica before the fraternity left. “The bikers [had] the ball in a backpack and they [biked]

relay-style with a car following them,” said Mike MacKay, cochair of Tour de Touchdown. Other members of the fraternity showed their support for the bikers by joining them in Bloomington for the football game. “More than 30 SigEps went down on Friday to hang out with the Indiana SigEp chapter, and then we went to the game with them the next day,” MacKay said. The bikers rode to south Beloit, Wis., Wednesday and continued the journey the next

day. The bikers traveled around Chicago to Lafayette, Ind., where seven additional bikers joined the group to finish the ride into Bloomington. Will Dorsch, a fraternity member and biker, trained with other bikers by running and biking two weeks prior to the trip. He said the fraternity had an “incredibly successful journey.” Sigma Phi Epsilon held a kickoff barbeque Wednesday before the trip, where several children from the Children’s sigep page 3

“…the great state University of Wisconsin should ever encourage that continual and fearless sifting and winnowing by which alone the truth can be found.”

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e’re on a mission from God,” Missy told the cashier at the gas station. He gave her a confused look and gingerly handed me back my debit card. Then some little old woman behind us in line offered us a short picture book on the Good Word. When we got back to the car I told Missy that the grocery store and a beer run didn’t qualify as a mission from God. In fact, He would probably frown on the beer part. But she had been acting weird all day. First she had called her roommate a smelly pirate hooker as we left their house, then told the teller at the bank that she felt the need for speed because the line was taking forever, and now she was creeping people out at the gas station. Unbeknownst to me, Missy was trying to win a bet. Her roommate Kim had bet her she couldn’t go the entire day speaking only in movie

quotes. Sounds like a fun idea, but as Kim neglected to tell me this small detail I had no idea why Missy was holding a flashlight under her chin and whispering, “I see dead people,” over and over. We finally got to the grocery store and headed to the alcohol aisle first. Kim and Missy were having a party at their place later, so we had to pick up supplies. Megan: I don’t know how many people are coming over, do you think we should get a 24-pack or a 30-pack? Missy: You’re killing me, smalls. Megan: Okay, 30-pack it is. Missy: You’re killing me, smalls! Megan: Geez, okay we’ll get two. Settle down. Shopping was pretty uneventful. Missy would wander around mumbling about a Swingline stapler and burning the building down. Occasionally she would grab odd cans of food and yell, “As God as my witness, I will never be hungry again!” I was beginning to get suspicious and all the other customers were doing their best to avoid us. Missy was asking me to say hello to her little friend, a bottle of Aunt Jemima, when we saw a young woman who was clearly upset. I asked

her what was wrong, and she had just seen her boyfriend in the store with his arm around another woman. She couldn’t decide whether to confront him or not. I tried comforting her, but Missy had it under control. She guided the young woman in front of a frozen food cooler, and had her stare in the reﬂective door. Missy: Look in the mirror, and tell me what you see! Woman: I see frozen wafﬂes and Hot Pockets. Missy: You see Junior? Woman: Yeah... wait, what? What the hell are you talking about? Missy: Well, let me tell you what I see. I see pride! I see power! I see a badass mother who don’t take no crap off of nobody! I realized she was quoting “Cool Runnings,” but it was still inspiring. As the young woman repeated the mantra, she worked up the courage to confront her ex. She marched over as Missy continued to yell encouraging movie quotations, including an offer to shove him into a “glass case of emotion” with the aforementioned Hot Pockets. Kim was clearly not entertained when we got back to the house and Missy fell into her arms pretending

to weep and whispering, “You had me at hello,” between sobs. Kim dropped her. Missy was now in hour 13 of her movie quoting, and there was no end in sight. Kim was getting desperate. Turns out the bet had been Kim would buy Missy a movie for every hour she went talking only in quotations. Pretty soon Kim could end up in rent trouble. But I had a plan. Softly I began to sing, “Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Mayer Weiner.” She knew it was a trap. That song is simply irresistible. With each refrain her foot began to tap, her smile to grow and for some reason she began to play air guitar. With Kim and I both singing our 14th refrain Missy ﬁnally exploded in a triumphant, “EVERYONE WOULD BE IN LOVE WITH ME!” Undone by a TV commercial, Missy sulked into the kitchen. She sat at the table and grabbed a can of beer. Cueing the cheesy music, she cracked her beer and whispered, “Here’s looking at you, kid.” If you think you could make it a whole day quoting movies, feel free to challenge Megan and her friends at mcorbett2@wisc.edu.

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news

Student killed by car while living abroad A UW-Madison student and participant in the Semester at Sea program, Kurt Leswing, 21, of Milwaukee, was struck by a car and killed in Hong Kong Nov. 7. Hong Kong officials said the driver of the vehicle was intoxicated when he hit Leswing and was arrested at the scene. Leswing was a senior business major at UW-Madison and has been described by members of the Semester at Sea program as gentle, kind, caring, easy-going and thoughtful. While traveling in the fall, the program hosted Nobel laureate Archbishop Desmond Tutu during its stopover in Cape Town, South Africa. Friends and family said Kurt was positively inﬂuenced by the archbishop’s address.

Leswing repeated a quote, “Take the anger from your hearts, wipe the tears from God’s eyes and live a life of love,” from the archbishop’s speech and shared it with family. “This terrible tragedy reminds us of the value of every human life and how fragile it is. Each of us who knew Kurt must try to remember him in a way that honors his life and the contributions he made to our community,” said Jack Van De Water, executive dean of the fall 2008 voyage. The U.S. Consul General in Hong Kong and the Institute for Shipboard Education are continuing to investigate the case. Leswing is survived by his parents, who reside in Milwaukee. —Erin Banco

Van Hollen appeals to overturn ruling in voter-registration case Attorney General J.B. Van Hollen, whose lawsuit against the state elections agency failed in the Dane County Circuit Court last month, filed an appeal of the decision Friday. The lawsuit, which sought to force the Government Accountability Board to perform checkups on voter registrations dating back to Jan. 1, 2006, sparked dissent from Democrats who claimed it was an attempt at voter suppression. Van Hollen maintains his

intention is to preserve election integrity and said in a statement last week he would not file for appeal before the election because there would be no time to settle the case before then, but will continue the lawsuit for the sake of future elections. “This appeal is important. There will be future elections. I believe that it is important for a state agency, in this case the Government Accountability Board, to follow the law,” Van Hollen said.

Men break into downtown apartment seeking drugs, money in targeted crime Madison police are looking for two gun-wielding men who broke into a Madison woman’s home Friday morning looking for drugs and drug money. The 22-year-old victim said the men were wearing black bandanas and carrying handguns when they forced entry into her home on the 800 block of Gorham Street. According to a police report, the men said they were looking for specific people before fleeing with the victim’s laptop. Police describe the two perpetrators as white males in their late teens to early 20s, about 5'8" and dressed in all black with their faces covered. The victim, who police said is not a UW-Madison student, was not

sigep from page 1 Hospital attended to show their support. Hospital directors organized an interview on ESPN Radio for the fraternity and called them throughout the journey to check on their progress. “We have a really great partnership with them,” Dorsch said. “They are able to bring people to our events, and then in return we are able to do a nice thing for them as well.” So far, the fraternity has raised over $5,000 but hopes to reach its goal of raising $10,000 in the coming months. Since 2005, Sigma Phi Epsilon has raised $30,000 for the children’s hospital to support the development of

injured in the incident. Madison Police Department public information officer Joel DeSpain said police believe the crime was a targeted robbery. He said police believe it is unrelated to the recent string of random robberies in the downtown area, including a Nov. 3 incident in which a UW-Madison junior was robbed at gunpoint outside the Kappa Alpha Theta sorority house on Langdon Street. “This was nothing similar to what we’ve seen, for instance, down on Langdon Street or something like that,” DeSpain said. “There should be no reason for heightened concern in the campus community because of this particular crime.” programs like weekly bingo. “It really makes a difference to the children’s lives at the hospital,” MacKay said. “It’s really neat to see where the money goes.”

“It really makes a difference to the children’s lives at the hospital.” Mike MacKay co-chair Tour de Touchdown

Donations to the American Family Children’s Hospital through SigEp will be accepted through December. Visit www.ﬁrstgiving. com/tourdetouchdown08 to donate.

JACOB ELA/CARDINAL FILE PHOTO

Former Badgers running back Ron Dayne received several athletic awards in his college career, including the Heisman Trophy. He was drafted by the New York Giants in 2000.

Fans to meet former Badger Ron Dayne at bookstore event Ron Dayne, former Badger football star and 1999 Heisman Trophy winner, will make a guest appearance at The University Bookstore Nov. 24. Dayne, nicknamed “The Great Dayne,” played for the Badgers from 1996 to 2000. During his college career, Dayne rushed for

911 from page 1 service’s requests, our first and paramount responsibility is to public safety,” Falk said in the memo. “I am concerned that communicators’ need to continually know and weigh these different rules sometimes hinders their ability to make as timely decisions as they must. Any such hindrance is unacceptable.” Falk recommended a series of steps for the center to take following the errors, including conducting a three-to-six-month review of existing law enforcement dispatch procedures. Until

lawton from page 1 energy from dairy waste. “We’re hoping for change, because in Wisconsin we don’t wait for change, we author change,” Lawton said. “We aspire to lead as the clean renewable-energy state.” The University of Wisconsin System and the state government reduced their energy consumption by 7 percent between 2005 and 2007 after urging from Gov. Jim Doyle, according to Lawton. She said they hope to reduce consumption by 10 percent by the end of 2008. According to Lawton, environmentalists worry the billions of dollars the government has used to bail out banks may not leave much left to be spent on

a total of 6,397 yards, breaking the previous record set by Ricky Williams at Texas. Dayne won several awards as a Badger, including Big Ten Player of the Year, and was a three-time All American. Dayne’s former number, 33, resides as one of the six numbers retired on the Camp the review is complete, Falk said 911 communicators and supervisors should be instructed to dispatch all calls requesting police service if there is any doubt that anyone’s safety is at risk. Madison Police Assistant Chief Randy Gaber maintained confidence in the 911 Center’s ability to properly dispatch officers despite the admitted errors last week and earlier in the year. “There’s a lot of things going on throughout the city, and so mistakes can happen and errors will occur,” Gaber said. “We will continue to work with them and try to get through these events.” renewable resources. She said she believes President-elect Obama’s plan for renewable energy is strong, but the state of the economy may hamper it. “There is still good reason

“In Wisconsin we don’t wait for change, we author change.” Barbara Lawton lieutenant governor State of Wisconsin

to worry about what can be accomplished in this economic climate,” Lawton said. —Megan Orear

Randall Stadium façade. After finishing his career at UW-Madison, Dayne was selected as the No. 11 pick of the 2000 NFL draft by the New York Giants. Fans can meet Dayne at the Hilldale Shopping Center at 702 N. Midvale Blvd. from 6 to 9 p.m.

moore from page 1 on technologies that disappear for four days at a time,” Moore said. Moore downplayed the common perception that nuclear energy is dangerous, saying no harm has ever come to the public from a nuclear accident in the West and nuclear waste can now be safely recycled. According to Moore, technology should not be banned simply because it could be used as a weapon. He said nuclear energy can be kept “safe and secure, and out of the wrong hands.” Moore said he clashes with many environmentalists on issues besides nuclear energy. He said politicians are too idealistic in their clean-energy initiatives, as well as that there is little evidence that humans are causing global warming and that it does not “warrant alarmism.” UW Energy Hub is a campus organization that connects students with an interest in energy issues. The conference, held at the Fluno Center all day Friday, attracted both students and representatives from energy companies. UW graduate student David Donovan, an organizer of the conference, introduced Moore as “one of the most forward-thinking and enlightened individuals in the environmental movement.”

opinion 4

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Monday, November 10, 2008

view Cardinal View editorials represent The Daily Cardinal’s organizational opinion. Each editorial is crafted independent of news coverage.

humanities stuck with lower funds

he Humanities building, once a representation of avant-garde design and grand-scale creativity and optimism, has become the embodiment of the subject area it houses. The liberal arts disciplines, like the Humanities building itself, have been under-funded and slowly deteriorating at UW-Madison for many years. As the science and engineering departments add more and more facilities, churn out greater and greater discoveries and watch their faculty receive unparalleled funds, the humanities department falls deeper and deeper into the shadow of its peer subject areas. According to a Wisconsin State Journal analysis, full-time humanities faculty made 25 percent less than faculty in other areas—translating to around a $30,000 differential in salary. Although the humanities departments have received the same percentage of the budget from the College of Letters and Science in the past decade, the amount of federal funding and grants pales in comparison to other departments on the west side of campus. These salary gaps are partially to blame for the recent exodus of humanities professors, TAs and graduate students. The English department lost 10 professors in the last two years and UWMadison ranks in the lowest third in comparison to peer universities for teaching assistant salaries. While UW-Madison’s science departments can offset low salaries with extra grant money, the liberal arts departments lose top graduate students to higher-funded universities. Although it is unfortunate the liberal arts disciplines are not receiving as substantial funding, federal grants or faculty salaries

Temporary solutions key to retaining UW faculty

as the major science departments, university administrators are being realistic about contribution-based funding. The scientiﬁc and engineering disciplines simply offer more tangible and applicable products and ideas to the world, making a stronger case for the increased funds and grants.

Changing technological issues demand greater funding, and the study of humanities must take a back seat.

The humanities department, while underfunded, must be realistic about its place in the current academic landscape. Just because federal funding and grants for the humanities are few and far between does not make liberal arts a dying breed. Changing technological and need-based scientiﬁc issues demands greater funding, and the study of humanities must take a back seat. If anything, the selection of Chancellor Biddy Martin may provide some much-needed aid to professors’ salaries in the liberal arts, an area where Martin has an extensive background. Her promise to immediately tackle teacher salaries and raise tuition may alleviate the sense of inadequacy currently resonating in the liberal arts at UW-Madison. For now, the humanities departments may have to be patient and hope Martin honors a commitment to ensure the university is strong across all disciplines. Besides that, the humanities departments simply have to accept their place within the result-based world of university funding and grants.

AMY GIFFIN/THE DAILY CARDINAL

RYAN DASHEK opinion columnist

ast Thursday, the UW System Board of Regents held a meeting discussing various challenges the UW System and UW-Madison in particular are facing in recruiting and retaining academic faculty. UW-Madison, which actively tries to recruit the best and brightest professors from all ﬁelds, is constantly being undercut by other schools who offer better wages or beneﬁts than those found here. Madison cannot continue to be the great research institute it currently is if its employees are continually poached by competing universities. Obviously, something must be done to reverse this trend. While the university could try offering faculty more benefits for working here at Madison, the only realistic long-term solution is wage increases. However, considering the current state of the economy, as well as cost of education, it would be in UW-Madison’s best interests to focus on offering short-term, low-cost solutions to professors in an attempt to increase faculty retention and, in the meantime, research various ways of raising wages that would not impinge on student tuition bills.

While the time may not be right for wage increases, it really is the only long-term solution to ﬁxing faculty retention.

Some people may argue that if a faculty member wants to leave, then UW-Madison should let them. After all, if another institute can offer professors better opportunities, why shouldn’t they take it? We shouldn’t even be offering these professors such bloated incomes in the first place—it only drives up the cost of education.

The problem with that is eventually all the talent will be sucked from UW-Madison, and we will no longer be the prestigious institute we once were.

With the current “graying” of UW professors, retaining younger, talented faculty members should be our current priority.

Thus, it is pertinent we focus on rebuilding our retention rates; however, the whole situation seems to be deteriorating rather rapidly. The rate of faculty leaving the university for better opportunities in the past four years has doubled compared to the rate four years prior to that, according to the Commission on Faculty Compensation and Economic Beneﬁts Report of 2007-’08. Also stated in the report was the fact that UW-Madison professors earn, on average, 13 percent less than the average salary of 11 peer colleges to UW-Madison. If this trend continues and more talented faculty members leave, it will become harder to attract well-qualiﬁed professors to the university without offering them far more lucrative wages. Thus, the university needs to act now before we end up in a downward spiral of losing talented faculty with the only escape being major hikes in salaries and, subsequently, student tuition. With the current state of the economy, the university can expect less backing from the state government, and since raising tuition is really out of the question (or at least should be), Madison cannot afford to offer higher wages to faculty right now. Instead, short-term benefits, such as domestic partner benefits and merit-based rewards, should be the focus. One rather low-cost merit-based rewards system that emerged earlier this year is called the Faculty Fellows Initiative. This initiative, which was started with private funding, creates fiveyear supplemental packages for

outstanding faculty. The money from these packages can be used to further the research of the faculty members, who also gain recognition for their work. This is a great, low-cost alternative to attract younger professors, and more programs like this should be added to UW-Madison’s arsenal in combating dwindling retention rates. While the time may not be right for wage increases, it really is the only long-term solution to ﬁxing this problem of faculty retention. Without increasing salaries, many UW professors are easy targets for rival institutes who can attract some of our best faculty members. Faculty will only remain for so long without increased beneﬁts; it is evident a wage increase is the only option in terms of permanent solutions. Although state funding may be lacking right now, once the economy swings out of the current recession, increased state backing will allow the university to give the earnings increases that many faculty members deserve. Otherwise, UW-Madison needs to begin researching alternatives in allocating money for wage increases if the state government is unwilling or unable to help.

Short-term beneﬁts, such as domestic partner beneﬁts and merit-based rewards, should be the focus now.

With the continual “graying” of the current generation of UW professors, retaining younger, talented faculty members should be our top priority. Although additional beneﬁts may be a good, low-cost, short-term solution, wage increases are really the only long-term solution available. For now, though, UW-Madison needs to focus on these temporary options to retain younger faculty, lest we allow this problem to deteriorate into a major crisis. Ryan Dashek is a junior majoring in biology. Please send responses to opinion@dailycardinal.com.

arts

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Monday, November 10, 2008

Fans may need ‘solace’ without catchphrase KEVIN SLANE citizen slane

hen I was nine, my parents wouldn’t let me watch most PG13 movies. I was certain I was the only kid in the whole world who didn’t get to enjoy the crude hilarity of “Happy Gilmore,” the cool guns and aliens in “Men in Black” or the epic romance of “Titanic.” In retrospect, I’m thankful that their parenting efforts saved me from losing three hours of my life to “Titanic,” but in general I felt left out. My only saving grace was the James Bond series. Most were rated PG from the days prior to the PG-13 rating, so I didn’t feel guilty when I secretly watched them at my friend Nick’s house. A typical weekend for us involved sleepovers filled with Magic cards, a lot of Nintendo 64 and a Bond film or two as we fell asleep. So the fact that “Quantum of Solace,” the 22nd Bond film, is coming out this Friday has me more than a little bit excited. Some of the changes the producers, director and writers have come up with, however, are very troubling.

Omitting one of the most famous lines in movie history is over the line.

As a classic Bond fan who has seen almost every installment, I have grown accustomed to the classic suave nature of Bond. The way he introduces himself as “Bond, James Bond,” the way he orders his martinis “shaken, not stirred” and the way he beds women with names that were clearly invented by 13year-old boys, like “Pussy Galore,” “Octopussy” or “Dr. Holly Goodhead.” These omnipresent traits were like a teddy bear, nurturing me through the good (Sean Connery, Roger Moore),

the bad (Pierce Brosnan) and the ugly (George Lazenby, Timothy Dalton). What worries me is the widely reported fact that “Quantum of Solace” purposely cut out the classic “Bond, James Bond” catchphrase, saying that it didn’t seem to fit in any particular spot in the film. This move was approved by the producers, director Mark Forster and James Bond himself, actor Daniel Craig. I understand the need to have some creative freedom, but omitting one of the most famous lines in movie history is over the line. Some fans really like the new direction the films have taken, portraying a rougher, early version of Bond. In “Casino Royale,” Craig’s Bond is rebellious, angry, violent and generally portrays a young, untested Bond. “Quantum of Solace” continues that story arc, much like “Batman Begins” and “The Dark Knight” represented a new start for the Batman franchise rather than a continuation of the original films. I like both modern Batman films and “Casino Royale,” but still feel the directors owe a nod to tradition. Bond is portrayed consistently throughout the series as a solitary being whose interactions are simply perfunctory with men and downright chauvinistic with women. Bond doesn’t have friends or family, he has traditions. His catchphrases, his drinks, his flashy car and his nifty gadgets are the only continuous thing from film to film. By depriving audiences their chance to stand up and cheer as Bond enters the room and introduces himself with style, the film is taking away the most significant ingredient to the essence of his character. I’m still going to see the film opening weekend, and based on early reviews, I’m betting “Quantum of Solace” won’t disappoint. Yet, when I leave the theater and think back to my youth, I’ll be missing those three little words. Wanna invite Kevin to your Bond release sleepover or have an idea for a new Bond catchphrase that will make him forget his nostalgia? E-mail him at kevslane@gmail.com

PHOTO COURTESY METRO-GOLDWYN-MAYER

Daniel Craig will have to rely on Bond’s gadgets and other traditions of his character to portray his version of the superspy.

PHOTO COURTESY UNIVERSAL PICTURES

Writer/director David Wain uses a traditional plot structure and his usual circle of supporting actors to create a ﬁlm that provides audiences with plenty of reasons to laugh, regardless of its formulaic construction.

‘Role Models’ of comedy Actors need little creativity from writers to make laughs By Danny Gottlieb THE DAILY CARDINAL

As far as raunchy comedies go, “Role Models” may not head the list, but it is definitely up there. From writer/director David Wain (“Wet Hot American Summer,” “The State”), the movie offers many laughs, giving Wain more ammunition as Judd Apatow’s only serious competition. Danny (Paul Rudd) and Wheeler (Seann William Scott) are co-workers who travel to elementary schools to promote an anti-drug message while also shilling out Minotaur energy drinks. Danny feels he is wasting his life away, and after getting dumped by his lawyer girlfriend (Elizabeth Banks), he causes some serious damage to the company vehicle that lands the duo with 150 hours of community service. They are then forced to mentor two troubled kids—supernerd Augie (Christopher Mintz-Plasse, better known as McLovin from “Superbad”) and foul-mouthed, 10-year-old Ronnie (Bobb’e J. Thompson). Although any movie could be carried solely on the back of Paul Rudd’s sarcasm, the rest of the cast steals the spotlight, specifically Jane Lynch (“The 40 Year Old Virgin,” “Best In Show”), who offers almost all of the memorable lines in the movie (“You know what I used to have for breakfast? Cocaine. Know what I used to have for lunch? Cocaine”). Not to be outdone is a healthy assortment of David Wain regulars, such as Ken Marino, Kerri Kenney-Silver, A.D. Miles, Joe Lo Truglio and Matt Walsh. The plot is predictable, so all the entertainment comes from the main cast. Elizabeth Banks spends far too little time on screen (she was too busy, presumably, starring in every other movie this year), but when she does appear, she plays the perfect “straight-arrow” character opposite Rudd. Although Scott and MintzPlasse both carry the stigma of their most well-known roles, each is still entertaining and lovable as characters similar to Stiffler and McLovin. And considering almost the entire cast comes from either

the universe of Judd Apatow or the cast of “The State,” outsider Scott ﬁts in perfectly.

The plot is predictable, so the entertainment comes from the main cast.

For those who saw the lame previews and assumed the movie would be a family-friendly comedy, take note of the R rating. Dick jokes, swear words (mostly from a 10year-old’s mouth) and, thank God, gratuitous nudity abound, so if you plan on taking your toddler to what you assume is the next “Bad News Bears,” for the sake of innocence,

don’t. And if you are worried that the movie won’t approach the offensive comedy of past hits like “Superbad,” you’ll be disgustingly surprised within the first two minutes (hint: it involves smelly fingers). The movie sags around its middle when it becomes obvious where everything is going to end up, but its third act is so ridiculously hilarious that it approaches brilliance. The twists and turns in the plot are straight out of the Screenwriters’ Handbook, but resolving the conflict with a massive battle between nerds wielding foam swords is definitely a highly enjoyable break from convention. If there is a moral to the film, it is that even the most conventional of plots can become entertaining with the ad-libs of a talented cast. Grade: B

PHOTO COURTESY UNIVERSAL PICTURES

Seann William Scott, despite still being seen by many as “Stifﬂer,” finds his niche in a film filled with talented, comedic actors.

comics 6

Green Bay Penny Pushers. Presently, 112,088 people (representing 4,750,936 shares) can lay claim to a franchise ownership interest. dailycardinal.com/comics

Monday, November 10, 2008

Little Joy

Today’s Sudoku

Anthro-apology

By Eric Wigdahl wigdahl@wisc.edu

How was that? What did you do at home?

Angel Hair Pasta

By Todd Stevens ststevens@wisc.edu

Solution, tips and computer program available at www.sudoku.com.

Fill in the grid so that every row, every column and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9. The Daily Code

Zinky

a b c d e f g h i

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Sid and Phil

By Alex Lewein lewein@wisc.edu

The Graph Giraffe

By Yosef Lerner ilerner@wisc.edu

“D frpsdqlrq’v zrugv ri shuvxdvlrq duh hiihfwlyh.” A quote from Homer Yesterday’s Code:

“Any fool can make a rule and any fool will mind it.”

Today’s Crossword Puzzle

Evil Bird

By Caitlin Kirihara kirihara@wisc.edu

Answer key available at www.dailycardinal.com NICE THINGS

1 5 9 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 23 24 25 26 28 30 33 35 36 37 40 41 42 43 45 46 47

ACROSS

Hostilities ender Money on hand Coffee fineness setting “For pity’s sake” Vocal range Barrel race locale Roman Catholic tribunal Design problem Lace end Generous thing Canaanite’s ancestor, biblically Sci-fi gun Authorize “My thoughts exactly!” Marian, for one Blubber Brave legend Split hairs Stuffing herb Elegant thing Where you may find yourself on thin ice Woodstock’s Guthrie Holography tool What some pitches are Canadian Oscar winner Sorvino Sofa problem “Tamerlane” poet

48 51 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 21 22 27 28 29 30 31

Tie up the phone Polite thing Dull Work to get, as someone’s trust Collier’s way in Fill with optimism Did an impression of Heckled Oscar winner Burstyn Wine shop section Many moons DOWN

Dry out See ya in Hawaii Dual-hulled boats Basil was one Loose tunic Ease, as anxieties Wild guess Plaintive cry Assigned scores Noted wordsmith Out of work Difﬁculty, so Morse bit Pierre and Marie’s daughter High-nosed ones Lampoon “Pretty Baby” director Where to see Puppis and Carina Dachshund, slangily Brutish boss

32 33 34 35 36 38 39 45 46 47 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56

Oktoberfest order City near New Delhi Rainless Unadulterated Luminary Henry Wells’ partner More cunning home of Walt Whitman Diamond elevations Strike forcefully Studied carefully (with “over”) “All kidding ___ ...” Bunches of bits? Do some telemarketing Iridescent gemstone A stone’s throw away Bull’s rouser 1939 movie setting Churchill’s sign

Classic Square and Cone

By Andrew Dambeck and Andrew Peck

sports

dailycardinal.com/sports

Monday, November 10, 2008

Wisconsin splits weekend against OSU and Michigan By Andy Van Sistine THE DAILY CARDINAL

Back on the road after two weeks of matches at home, the Wisconsin volleyball team (6-8

Big Ten, 16-10 overall) finished the weekend with mixed results and failed to make up any ground in the conference race. The Badgers defeated Ohio

NICK KOGOS/CARDINAL FILE PHOTO

Wisconsin freshman outside hitter/setter Janelle Gabrielsen registered a triple-double for the Badgers against Michigan Saturday evening.

State (1-12, 10-15) in a 25-23, 13-25, 25-19, 26-24 rout but finished the weekend with a 2518, 26-28, 26-28, 19-25 loss to Michigan (8-6, 20-6) in Ann Arbor Saturday night. Wisconsin is stuck at sixth place in the Big Ten standings with just three weeks left to go in the season, and will have to play well down the homestretch to make the NCAA tournament in December. The victory Friday night was a big one, considering the Buckeyes accumulated more kills, assists, digs and blocks than the Badgers over the course of the match. Ohio State sophomore outside hitter Katie Dull led all players on the night with 22 kills, but no other Buckeye was able to amass more than eight in the four sets. On the other side of the net, junior outside hitter Brittney Dolgner had 16 kills while senior middle blocker Audra Jeffers threw down 11 of her own. The two players also accumulated eight blocks, while senior middle blocker Morgan Salow had six blocks of her own. “It does feel good to end that one in four because we had to battle for a couple [sets] there especially in the ﬁrst game we were down and looking kind of ﬂat,” UW head coach Pete Waite said.

“[We] started going, had a little hiccup in game two and we went flat again, [had] kind of a bad start,” Waite said. “But even at the end here, we were ahead, they came back and we still hung in there and battled to the end. That’s something JEFFERS we’ve wanted to see, we’ve been working on in practice and we got to see it tonight.” Against Michigan, Wisconsin once again allowed its opponent to rack up more kills, assists and digs and this time paid the price. The Badgers came out strong, hitting .250 to the Wolverines’ .021 in the first set to take a lead in the match. Wisconsin was in position to win another set, up 22-19 in the second, but Michigan freshman right side hitter Alex Hunt tallied three kills to rally the Wolverines and tie the game at 23. After a Michigan set point, a Badger set point and two more Michigan set points, a Wolverine block put the set away. The third set ended in a similar fashion, and paved the way for a rout in the fourth to take the match.

Despite the loss, a few Badgers still had a productive outing. Freshman outside hitter/setter Janelle Gabrielsen recorded the ﬁrst triple-double for Wisconsin since 1988 with 13 kills, 15 assists and 10 digs. Her 13 kills were also a career high for Gabrielsen, who led the Badgers in hitting percentage with .429 on the night. Senior defensive specialist Faye McCormack also had a career night, tallying 12 digs in four sets. But it was the trio of Hunt, senior middle blocker Beth Karpiak and junior outside hitter Juliana Paz who were the stars of the match, combining for 46 kills and seven blocks. “It was a great match and very competitive,” Waite said. “We saw some great things out of our players and a lot of them finished with career-highs … Faye McCormack came in and did a great job in the back row for us. Nellie Gabrielsen had a career night with a triple double and that’s just fantastic. We’re not happy with the results, but we’re pleased with the efforts and the progress we made.” The Badgers’ next round of conference opponents will be Minnesota Friday and Iowa Sunday, both of whom defeated Wisconsin in the first week of Big Ten play this season. —uwbadgers.com contributed to this report.

UW women’s basketball team defeats UW-River Falls in exhibition game By Jay Messar THE DAILY CARDINAL

One word can summarize this year’s Wisconsin women’s basketball team: fresh. A fresh new basketball surface on the Kohl Center ﬂoor, a pair of fresh assistant coaches on the sidelines and plenty of freshmen making up the support crew of the team itself—this season marks a new beginning for UW. With the graduation of three seniors who registered almost half the team’s minutes and over 57 percent of the team’s scoring, the Badgers have no choice but to move on. And that means plenty of fresh faces will need to ﬁll some big shoes. “Certainly the decorated players of Jolene Anderson, Janese Banks and Danielle Ward are not longer with us,” UW head coach Lisa Stone said. “We’re a different basketball team. We look different and we hope that we have different results. The Badgers faced UW-River Falls Sunday in its annual UW vs. WIAC exhibition matchup. River Falls led the series history 1-0, with the Falcons defeating UW 67-52 in 1975. But in Sunday’s contest, results did not favor the visiting team as Wisconsin jumped

valai from page 8 “I was just angry, because I think we should be playing better than that so I just knew I had to make a big play,” Valai said. “I saw the quarterback running and it’s like ‘see-run-hit,’ and just hit him as hard as I could.”

recap from page 8 down the field for a touchdown, culminating with a one-yard run by Chappell to close the gap to one. Indiana then received a golden opportunity to take its first lead late in the first half after Gilreath muffed a punt deep in Wisconsin territory. But Chappell fumbled on a quarterback draw and senior linebacker

out to a 20-0 lead and never looked back, defeating UW-RF 71-38. While the 33-point loss was not exactly what UW-RF head coach Cindy Hovet was looking for, she realized the benefits of playing against such a decorated program. “Honestly, coming down here is just a great experience for our kids,” Hovet said. “The whole state has something about the UW and coming down here and playing against Lisa Stone’s Badgers … Pulling into that garage, even that simple thing and seeing grins ear to ear … things like that is just a cool experience.” “Our kids get to come out and we really get to see how much they are going to compete,” Hovet said. “When your kids will keep competing when they are down 30 points, that’s exciting for us to see.” Freshman guard Jamie Russell played well off the bench for the Badgers, scoring eight points in her first five minutes of play. Russell led the Badgers with 15 points, seven rebounds and three steals. Freshman forward Ashley Thomas also chipped in nine points in her first outing. “Jamie had a great first day … she gave us a tremendous lift off the

bench,” Stone said. “And Ashley Thomas—her patience was awesome. She came in when she was ready, got big and wide in the post … she does a great job getting a hand on the ball.” Stone said the freshman class will play a large role in the team’s success this season—beginning on the defensive end. “Jamie, Ashley and the rest of our team needs to continue to take steps forward defensively,” Stone said. “We showed some signs, we’re trying to ﬂex our muscles and have an identity on the defensive end.” “It’s an understanding of day-byday improvement, not getting too frustrated with yourself, slowing down and letting things happen.” Stone said UW needed to establish different goals to remain focused after the Badgers pulled ahead within the ﬁrst 10 minutes of the game. “We had made a statement with 2:32 left in the game to not allow 40 points and they locked down,” Stone said. “We didn’t foul, played really good defense, got some key rebounds and executed offensively. “Our game plan is pretty simple— you play defense, contest shots, protect the lane. On offense—take good shots

and take care of the ball. I thought we did a pretty decent job of that.” Although the overmatched Falcons didn’t prove the most accurate gauge of the team’s progress, Stone knows the season is just getting started. “We’re far from where we need to

Roaming the secondary this season, Valai has inﬂicted vicious hits on the opposition, and has quickly made a name for himself in the Big Ten Conference. “He has receivers thinking twice about when they go across the middle. Even ball carriers, when they run the ball, they see 12 ﬂashing they get

down,” said Casillas. “This year he has put a couple of guys out, and he has the ability to impose his will and that is exactly what he did today.” With three games left and a sub.500 record, the Badgers needed a win Saturday to keep their hopes alive for a bowl game. Playing physically, especially for Valai, will be imperative dur-

ing the last few weeks of the season. “I’m trying to, just want to play physical and play aggressive,” he said. “Just got to come with it every time, make them respect you somehow.” Respect is something the Badgers have not had for most of the season, but Valai sees the mentality against Indiana as a major turning point for

DeAndre Levy scooped up the ball and returned it to midﬁeld. The hit Chappell took on the fumble knocked him out of the game. Indiana used three quarterbacks in the second half to try to come back, but none of them were productive. Banged up junior Kellen Lewis, sophomore Mitchell Evans and freshman Teddy Schell combined for only two completions on 14 passing attempts.

hockey from page 8 The Badger defense held strong for the game’s ﬁnal 13 minutes, and Wisconsin came away with the 3-2 win. “When we didn’t keep it simple … when we did not get the puck deep and those types of things, that’s what caused the ﬂow to go the other way at times,” Eaves said. “That’s

be, but we’re off to a pretty good start,” Stone said. Wisconsin opens its regular season schedule Nov. 17 at Brookings, S.D. against South Dakota State. The Jackrabbits came up just short in a 6662 loss at the Kohl Center last season.

ISABEL ALVAREZ/THE DAILY CARDINAL

Wisconsin freshman forward Ashley Thomas scored nine points against UW-Riverfalls Sunday in her first game as a Badger.

something we will continue to pound with our guys, and again raise that level of consistency to get that puck in the zone and get that puck in the neutral zone.” The Badgers got a fair amount of production from their core of defensemen over the weekend. Blueliners accounted for 15 points in the two games, 11 coming from McBain and Smith.

the program this season. “That’s what we’ve needed all season,” Valai said. “It’s called ‘manning up,’ and we ﬁnally manned up and came out there and played good ball, so that was big for us.” If you think the Badgers are on the road to a successful end of the season, e-mail Nate at ncarey@wisc.edu. “When you talk about the points that our young defensive core has gotten, that’s them playing to their strengths, that’s them using what they have naturally,” Eaves said. “That’s something that we want them to do. The fact they are doing it, it makes us a better team.” In conference play, Smith ranks fourth in the WCHA in points, and McBain ranks ﬁrst.

sports Badgers earn ﬁrst conference road win 8

dailycardinal.com/sports

Monday, November 10, 2008

RECAP By Scott Kellogg THE DAILY CARDINAL

BLOOMINGTON, Ind.— The Wisconsin football team amassed 441 rushing yards, including 168 from sophomore wide receiver David Gilreath to trample Indiana 55-20 in Bloomington Saturday. Gilreath was one of three Badgers to rush for at least 100 yards. Junior running back P.J. Hill gained 126 yards on the ground and freshman running back John Clay totaled 112. But it was Gilreath who provided the biggest plays and the greatest momentum swings for Wisconsin. With the Badgers leading Indiana 24-20 early in the second half, Gilreath took an end-around deep in Wisconsin territory and ran for a 90yard touchdown to give the Badgers an 11-point lead. From there, Wisconsin used a steady dose of Hill and Clay to control the clock and secure the win. “They started wearing down a little,” Clay said. “We kept pounding it and the offensive line was moving them out of the way.” Behind its offensive line, it didn’t really who was touching the ball for Wisconsin. Whether it was Gilreath, Hill or Clay, the Badgers’ ball carriers had their way with the times, and Gilreath rushed eight Hoosier defense. times, giving himself an average “It always starts out front,” Hill of 21 yards per rush. said. “The guys out front did a great The decision to pound the ball job getting the defenders off the ball early was a choice made earlier this and putting a hat on a hat.” week by head coach Bret Bielema Gilreath was also quick to and his staff based on what they point out how solid the offen- saw studying Indiana’s defense. sive line was and how important “We felt that during the that is to the course of the Football running game. week, based “I think it’s off of what overall) 5-5 Ten, Big (2-5 55 the product we’ve seen on (1-5 Big Ten, 3-7 overall) 20 of the line,” film, we should Gilreath said. be able to get “Everyone in front of me is in here and run the football,” doing a great job of making Bielema said. holes in front of me and I’m just Wisconsin established the run running through them.” in the ﬁrst half with Hill and Clay, Wisconsin averaged 7.2 yards and also ran end-arounds early to per rush on 61 total carries. Hill Gilreath. When the Badgers saw and Clay each carried the ball 19 the success the play was producing,

PHOTOS BY KYLE BURSAW AND DANNY MARCHEWKA/THE DAILY CARDINAL

they stuck with it. “I didn’t know how much coach would go to me today but it was working, so if it’s not broken, don’t fix it,” Gilreath said. What turned out to be a lopsided game had a competitive first half. Wisconsin turnovers and efficient play from Indiana sophomore quarterback Ben Chappell kept Indiana close throughout the half. A touchdown pass by Chappell cut the deficit to four late in the first quarter. Chappell caught junior safety Chris Maragos flatfooted and connected with junior wide receiver Andrew Means for 43 yards on a fly route. Then, down by eight late in the second quarter, Indiana marched recap page 7

Valai’s hit sets the tone for Wisconsin NATE CAREY sports magnate

all it getting back to basics and running the ball, playing aggressive or, of course, playing Wisconsin football, the Wisconsin Badger football team found something in Bloomington, Ind., Saturday that it has lacked for

the majority of the season. During their 55-20 dismantling of the Indiana Hoosiers, the Badgers found the aggressive, physical mentality that players and fans alike have come to expect from the Cardinal and White on the field. “This is Wisconsin football,” senior linebacker Jonathan Casillas said. “We are known for running the ball, being very physical upfront, hitting people all over, and we are starting to get back to that.” Physicality was the name of the game as the Badgers ran early and often on their way to a season-high 441 yards rushing. Defensively, the physical, aggressive nature that the Badgers have missed this season came in the form of sophomore safety Jay Valai. With 1:16 left in the first half and Wisconsin leading 21-20, it seemed as if UW would once again give away a lead after shooting itself in the foot. After sophomore wide receiver David Gilreath muffed a punt and Indiana recovered the ball at the Wisconsin 15yard line, all the pressure rested on the Badger defense. On the first play from scrimmage, Indiana sophomore quarterback Ben Chappell pulled down a high snap and ran a draw up the middle, where Valai was waiting. Valai laid a vicious hit on Chappell, who fumbled the ball on the play. While UW senior linebacker and team captain DeAndre Levy picked up the ball and returned it to the 49-yard line, Chappell laid motionless on the field. Chappell eventually got up and walked off the field under his own power, but he did not return to the game after suffering the concussion. Valai’s hit not only left Chappell in a daze, but seemed to stun the entire Indiana sideline, as the Hoosiers would not score again the rest of the game. For Valai, the team’s 4-5 record entering the game against Indiana was all the motivation he needed to play aggressively. valai page 7

Wisconsin takes two games from Michigan Tech over weekend By Ben Breiner THE DAILY CARDINAL

Neither game was perfect. There were misplays, lucky bounces, a slew of power play scores and even a pair of disallowed goals. At the end of Saturday night, however, the Wisconsin men’s hockey team did something they had failed to accomplish since March of 2007: win three games in a row. The Badgers (3-4-1 WCHA, 3-6-1 overall) swept Michigan Tech over the weekend, more than doubling their point total for the season. Wisconsin’s 6-0 victory Saturday looked excellent on the score sheet, but that overstates the Badger’s performance. “We probably played average,” Wisconsin head coach Mike Eaves said. “You take a look at the 6-0 score and you think, wow, that’s really something. But there’s a little false gold there. The power play was five-for-seven. We still didn’t do things as well as we wanted to 5-on-5 for whatever reason.” The special teams were a highlight

on Saturday as Wisconsin turned away all six of the Huskies’ power plays and saw ﬁve of their nine power-play shots make their way into the net. The Badgers’ scoring punch was spearheaded by junior forward Blake Geoffrion, who made himself comfortable in front of the Michigan Tech crease. Geoffrion scored the first and last Wisconsin goals, SMITH redirecting two long shots from sophomore defenseman Brendan Smith into the net. “He’s most effective when he’s there and it’s ﬁnally showing itself,” Eaves said. “I hope he continues to buy into it and plant that big body of his in front of the net and let the puck hit him and whack away at rebounds and tip pucks in, because that’s where he’s being most effective right now.” The game was also a first for sophomore goaltender Scott Gudmandson. The Alberta native had his first career shutout, stop-

ping 34 Michigan Tech shots. When the game was still 1-0, it appeared the Huskies scored after the puck trickled through Gudmandson’s pads and was slammed into the net. The referees, however, disallowed the goal, saying the whistle had been blown. The Badgers had a bit more trouble with the Huskies Friday despite a fast start. Sophomore defenseman Ryan McDonagh opened the scoring for the Badgers just over a minute into the game. That lead grew to two when junior defenseman Jamie McBain hit a long slap shot from the point with just 13 seconds left in the first frame. The Badgers scored once in the second period, when junior forward John Mitchell found himself all alone in the slot and fired the puck over Husky senior goaltender Rob Nolan. “I just thought in the first period they were first to loose pucks, they won the 50/50 battles and I don’t think we were very physical in the first period,” Michigan Tech head coach Jamie Russell said. After that, the game began to turn.

Senior center Alex Gagne got Michigan Tech on the board when he sent a rebound—which Wisconsin senior goalie Shane Connelly had kicked away—through an open

net. Michigan Tech cut the deﬁcit to one when freshman forward Alex MacLeod put back another rebound. hockey page 7

LORENZO ZEMELLA/THE DAILY CARDINAL

Wisconsin junior forward Blake Geoffrion scored two goals and registered two assists for the Badgers against Michigan Tech this weekend at home.