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UW group seeks to recycle masks By Beth Shoop STAFF WRITER
The University of WisconsinMadison community has probably never noticed the TerraCycle Disposable Masks branded “Zero Waste Boxes” placed on campus for proper disposal of face masks. This is likely because these boxes could only be found in one place — The lobby of Engineering Hall. “TerraCycle uses a process called downcycling where they take the masks and they’ll make things like asphalt, plastic traffic cones or some lower grade material from the face mask,” UW-Madison Professor and Director of Chemical Upcycling of Waste Plastics, George Huber said. “So, the plastic doesn’t go back to the original face mask, but they down cycle them to lower quality materials. Each TerraCycle box includes signage, a built-in liner, shipping and, finally, processing of the recycled masks after the box is filled completely. Each Zero Waste Box retails for upwards of $86. Huber believes that there’s a better way. A team of researchers at the UW-Madison developed a process that recycles disposable masks into new plastic goods — not just lesser materials. Given the increased use of disposable masks as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic, practices on how to properly dispose of them — such as the research at UW-Madison — have emerged amid concerns about them ending up in landfills or littered, and neg-
atively affecting the environment. This new recycling approach, a solvent-targeted recovery and precipitation (STRAP) process, began under the direction of Huber. Huber noted that the university is “a global leader in plastic recycling.” “We’re working with more than 17 different companies and the whole plastic value chain from plastic manufacturers, to plastic processors, to brand owners, to develop innovative technology,” emphasized Huber. The process utilizes disposable masks and other plastics, grinds them into a fine powder and pulls out the polypropylene in order to create new plastic goods. While the process has been established, the research is not yet available for widespread use. Moving from a small scale process to a larger, commercial one is a goal for the near future, Huber said. The study began 18 months ago, and the focus has since evolved with the addition of postdoctoral researcher Dr. Jiuling Yu to the group. Originally focusing on multilayer plastic film, the research shifted due to the surge in production, use and disposal of face masks, said Yu. After learning about the TerraCycle Zero Waste Box located on campus, Huber explained the STRAP technology to the UW-Madison College of Engineering Director of Safety, Jesse Decker, the individual who purchased the mask collection box
for Engineering Hall. Huber asked if he and his team could use the masks to continue their research in the mask division instead of returning the masks back to TerraCycle. Decker agreed, and the mask division of the research project began its work. However, the box was removed shortly after Huber acquired the masks for the STRAP project for reasons relating to cost and lack of use. With this unfortunate turn of events, Huber described frustrations with the cost of recycling. “We shouldn’t have to pay money to recycle our stuff. There should be more economical ways to do this,” Huber emphasized. “I think with the technology we’re developing, potentially in the future we could actually start paying people to give us their used face masks and make other products from them.” Associated Students of Madison Sustainability Chair Ashley Cheung had similar views regarding proper disposal of masks around campus. “If we were to put mask collection boxes in campus buildings similar to how we have recycling, they would have to be as common as trash and recycling cans are, otherwise people would not naturally think to use them,” Cheung said. Both Huber and Cheung added that it is not financially feasible to place and maintain the boxes on campus. Huber, Cheung and Yu all
agree that educating people around campus and in the greater Madison community about the importance and ease of recycling masks and other plastics is needed to see change. “If regular people aren’t taught how to use categorical waste disposal systems, environmentallyfriendly disposal will not happen,” Cheung said about the university
In addition to this, Huber expressed the importance of avoiding false information when discussing education about recycling practices, noting that proper education was “super” important. Although the research is still operating at a smaller-scale, Huber and the research team is looking to expand in the near future. “Our group is collaborating
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A UW-Madison research group is looking into alternative mask recycling methods. specifically. “It is up to the university to decide (to educate) its community members on environmentally-friendly mask disposal.” Yu highlighted the importance of potential outreach methods to promote proper mask disposal. “[Creating] simple flow charts that could be used to express which parts of popular and common plastic waste can be recycled so you know which ones you can dispose of,” Yu emphasized.
with another group in Michigan Technological University to develop a pilot-scale STRAP system,” Yu said. “Once it finishes, it could be applied on many types of plastic wastes.” Ultimately, the goal, according to Huber, is to have the project completely operational by the end of the year. “[It] will allow us to transform the plastic industry and make it more sustainable,” Huber said.
Madison bakeries ramp up to raise money for Ukraine By Nadia Tijan STAFF WRITER
Madison bakeries Bloom Bake Shop and Bayk are selling Ukrainian pastries to raise money for relief funds for Ukraine. Their contributions are a part of efforts in the Madison community and countries around the globe to support Ukraine during the Russian invasion. Bloom Bake Shop on Monroe Street is baking the traditional Jewish pastry “hamantaschen” after bakers around the world joined in a movement called “Hamantaschen for Ukraine.” The bakery is donating 70% of the proceed to Polish Humanitarian Action, a group assisting refugees at the Polish border with food and medical care. “I feel like as a being that cares about other beings, I think it’s impossible for it not to impact me and others. I don’t think I’m alone in my feel-
PHOTO BY NELSON LU
Bloom Bake Shop is selling hamantaschen to raise money for the Ukraine crisis.
ings,” said Bloom Bake Shop owner Annemarie Maitri. The pastry will be sold for $2.50 from March 4-17. The bakery’s hamantaschen are hand-made in the bakery and usually have a fruit filling like raspberry or apricot. “I hope we can make more than we can handle because that means we are really impacting people,” Maitri said. “If we sell around 3,000, that’s around $5,600.” Maitri has shifted the bakery’s production schedule to prioritize raising funds for Ukraine. Despite the scale of the conflict, Maitri feels obligated to support the people of Ukraine. “We have to collectively feel that we can make a difference,” Maitri said. Madison’s small-batch artisan babka bakery Bayk is also donating to Ukrainian relief funds. Forty percent of proceeds from
sales of its apricot pistachio crumble babka is going to José Andrés’ World Central Kitchen. Bayk specializes in a babka common throughout Eastern Europe, including Ukraine. A typical Ukrainian babka would be filled with nuts, “probably hazelnuts or walnuts,” or a mix of dried fruits and nuts, says Susan Kay of Bayk. There are many other options for Madison residents who want to learn more about Ukraine’s culture through cuisine. Schnitzel is sold at Adamah Neighborhood Table, Essen Haus and Heritage Tavern while potato pancakes can be found at the Dairyland Family Restaurant, Pancake Cafe and Stalzy’s Deli. Borscht, the Ukrainian national dish, is a featured seasonal soup at Stalzy’s Deli. Intermarket, located on 5317 Old Middleton Road, carries an assortment of Eastern European groceries.
“…the great state University of Wisconsin should ever encourage that continual and fearless sifting and winnowing by which alone the truth can be found.”
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Thursday, March 3, 2022
An independent student newspaper, serving the University of Wisconsin-Madison community since 1892 Volume 131, Issue 20
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Editorial Board Grace Hodgman • Em-J Krigsman • Addison Lathers • Anupras Mohapatra • Riley Sumner • Ethan Wollins
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UW Housing employees’ COVID concerns By Ian Wilder STAFF WRITER
As Dane County’s mask mandate expired earlier this month, University of WisconsinMadison students are now faced with the expiration of the university-wide mandate on the first day of spring break, March 12. Some praised the removal of the mask mandate, while others were less optimistic about the future without masks. One group particularly worried by the mandate removal are student employees. Student employees are an essential part of the employment structure at the university — from working at hall desks to dining halls, student employees play a day-to-day role in ensuring the proper and efficient functions of UW-Madison systems. Some student employees from University Housing feel that their voice hasn’t been heard as the university prepares to drop its mask requirement in residence halls. While some have vented through the Associated Students of Madison and their respective Student Workers Rights Committee, many report that they still don’t feel that their concerns were taken into consideration. “The university could not have chosen a worse time to remove the mandate,” said Grace Bauernfeind, a student supervisor at Carson’s Market, a smaller dining market surrounded by Adams, Slichter and Tripp Hall. “Students are going to travel on break, and I worry COVID will spread like wildfire when we get back.” Bauernfeind feels that the announcement has been anxiety inducing, adding that she “already felt unsafe often being around people without any other COVID-19 safety precautions than mask wearing.” Bauernfeind’s frustrations seemed to be matched by many others working in UW Housing. One of those people with particular insight on the problems faced by University Housing is Bea Sutton, part of the Head Office team at Carson’s Market. The Head Office teams are groups of students working in the dining halls who are responsible for making schedules, managing staff and addressing concerns and problems, amongst a plethora of other assigned responsibilities. “The university does currently offer full time staff, but not
work,” said Sutton. “They need to have every student who wants to keep themself safe [to] have that option provided to them by the university, or they shouldn’t be taking away the security [aka the mask mandate] that they already have.” This sentiment was matched by many students working for University Housing. Very few, if any, were outright against lifting the mandate. Instead, they felt that the mask mandate should only be lifted once the university is able to provide the highest level of protection to its student employees. This hasn’t been, and continues to not be, the case, according to employees. Student employees only have access to surgical masks in their role. “With the high vaccination rate on campus, low case counts and mask options, students have tools to help protect themselves from COVID-19,” said Brendon Dybdahl, a spokesperson for University Housing, in response to an inquiry from the Cardinal. “Housing continues following the campus guidelines, which are informed by guidance from the CDC and local health experts. The risk of COVID-19 in housing environments is no greater than elsewhere on campus or in public settings, where masks will be optional as well.” Dybdahl mentioned that since the beginning of the pandemic, they have made “masks and face coverings available to student employees,” but made no comment on the availability of KN95 or N95 mask availability. For many student employees, the decision to not extend the mask mandate is another part of a string of frustrations that have already caused many to quit. One of these points of contention is the University Housing employee COVID-19 policy. “The COVID policy is very vague. If someone calls in and says they’re sick, ‘I think I have COVID,’ I can’t excuse them unless they have a positive COVID test. If their test results don’t come back for a few days and they are out of, or can’t afford to take, an unpaid personal day, they could spread COVID because they are required to come into work,” said Sutton, who often had to make these difficult calls. Bauernfeind echoed these concerns about the policy. “I find the Housing COVID policy to be a farce put in place
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For the record Corrections or clarifications? Call The Daily Cardinal office at 608-262-8000 or send an email to editor@dailycardinal.com.
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UW Housing employees are concerned that "COVID will spread like wildfire". student employees, two KN95 masks a week. If they extended that to student employees, I would feel safe at work, and I feel more people would be safe at
only to keep up the appearance of trying for the general public. If an employee suspects they have COVID, they basically have to come in regardless, unless they
get a negative result, and I have ended up working next to someone with COVID as a result,” said Bauernfeind. “Whoever came up with this clearly just wanted to make sure there were enough student employees at work without thinking through the implications of the policy, and I often do not feel safe because of it.” On top of all of those frustrations, University Housing is facing an employee shortage that is taking a serious toll on their student workers. “Staffing is already such a huge issue. We are extremely understaffed and it’s causing a lot of stress, and because of the stress people are quitting,” said Sutton, who said she is working nearly 25 hours per week, the maximum number of hours possible to take on as a student worker. Anna Kleiber is a team member, which is the equivalent of a student entry-level position at University Housing, at Carson’s Market. Kleiber brought up the staffing issue as a major stressor for her and her coworkers. “We’re working harder than ever,” said Kleiber. “I’m doing three people’s worth of work in one shift to close the dining hall.” Even then, one dining hall employee reported that they are consistently closing anywhere from half an hour to an hour later than last semester. “Most of our staff are students, most of whom are freshmen, and lots of them are taking classes with large numbers of people. People are going to be exposed to people who they don’t know are vaccinated, and without effective [KN95, N95] masks, lots of our student employees will be faced with a decision between class, grades and work, and they’re placing lots of these choices on the students which they shouldn’t have to,” said Sutton, who is worried that the lack of masks in lecture halls might further exacerbate the staffing problem. University Housing has taken steps to increase student staffing, and reward current staff for their work. Current employees are able to refer new employees for a $200 bonus. Additionally, University Housing is offering a lump sum bonus of $1.00 per hour paid out at the end of each semester. However, even those measures didn’t go without controversy. The main criticism from student employees, including Kleiber, of the referral bonus was that instead of offering a hiring bonus to pull in new employees, the referral bonus goes to employees who already work for housing. “It’s like a slap in the face,” said one Gordon Avenue Market employee referring to the lump sum bonus, who preferred to stay anonymous. “I’m working my ass off, filling in for the staff we’re missing, and instead of giving us the $1 raise, they choose to rope people into continuing working in this environment, which is beyond stressful. I don’t see how you can claim to put students first, as housing does, and continue to pressure those who choose to work for them
to continue to do so, even when their mental health starts to deteriorate. It’s ridiculous.” When asked about why those student employees that are upset with working conditions choose not to quit, they typically respond that they feel an obligation to their friends and coworkers. Some students feel that quitting would make things worse for their friends who can’t afford to quit, be it for financial aid reasons or others. “I am a low income student. I need to work in order to still go to school here, and this job is very important to my livelihood. I wish they would at least give the option [of the best masks] to all students; they need to at the very least offer the option for everyone to be as safe as they can be,” Sutton added. Many students feel that the solution is simple: higher wages. “I think the best way to keep the people we have as well as bring new workers in would be to increase wages,” Kleiber stated. “Being a student worker isn’t easy on its own and it’s even harder when we’re understaffed and expected to pick up the slack without any extra compensation.” Student employees acknowledge that raising wages isn’t easy, but many were quick to point out that University Housing has offered the additional $1.00 per hour lump sum pay increases in the past, as was the case when employees received an additional $1.00 for every hour they worked last semester. Kleiber, amongst others, cite this as evidence that wages could be raised. “University Housing is always looking at our student employee wages to ensure we’re providing fair compensation,” Dybdahl said. “At times during the pandemic, Housing has offered incentives in appreciation for hard work during challenging times, including a temporary $1/hour increase throughout the fall 2020 semester, but this was to reward their extraordinary efforts, not to reflect any higher risks for staff. This past fall, Housing permanently raised the starting wage for all student positions to a minimum of $11, and we continue reviewing how we compensate our student workers.” The university’s pandemic response has caused uncertainty for all students, particularly for those who rely on their campus jobs to sustain themselves and their studies. Now, many of those workers face an entirely new challenge — trying to figure out whether they want to continue their employment without the requirement of masks. For some, the decision to stay will be easy. For those students who do continue to worry about the effects of the pandemic, the path forward is less clear. “With removing the mask mandates, many people come up to me and they are nervous, and (they) ask if we will still have masks at work after spring break. And I have to respond that I don’t know, and that’s scary,” Sutton said. “I’m afraid we’re going to lose lots of employees due to this fear.”
arts
Thursday, March 10, 2022
dailycardinal.com
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Concert, Khruangbin
Khruangbin shines at The Sylvee with a visually and sonically jaw-dropping set
By Pranav Volety STAFF WRITER
Fusion band Khruangbin released the sequel to their charttopping album Texas Sun with the follow-up Texas Moon and kicked their nation-wide tour off with a visually and sonically jaw-dropping set Friday, March 4 at The Sylvee. The concert kicked off with an astounding performance by Nubya Garcia, an English saxophonist and musician, who set the stage with her powerful solos and unique embellishments throughout their time on stage. A beginning that demanded attention, it was clear the crowd wanted even more from bassist Casimir Daniels, drummer Barrell Jones and key pianist Jahari Stampley. The choice of having Nubya Garcia as an accompanying tour presence was clearly strategic. From her track “Impossible Kingdoms” on her debut EP Nubya’s 5ive to her more recent composition of “Together Is A Beautiful Place To Be”, she showed her prowess as an artist and performer. Accompanying artist Jahari Stampley had his moment in the spotlight as well, performing a silencing yet rousing solo that stole the show. With Barrell Jones and Casimir Daniels demonstrating pure passion and agility in their performances, the sonic consilience of influences the group
SHANE FRUCHTERMAN/THE DAILY CARDINAL
Fusion band Khruangbin released the sequel to their album Texas Sun with Texas Moon and kicked their nation-wide tour off with a visually and sonically jaw-dropping set Friday, March 4 at The Sylvee. brought to their set was the perfect setup for Khruangbin. With a light show that drew deafening applause from the crowd, the slow and dramatic entry of Laura Lee and Khruangbin was a spectacle to behold. After eagerly awaiting their entry and witnessing the detailed construction of their set, it became apparent that this show was bound to be one that Madison wouldn’t forget. Their set ran the gamut of songs
in their extensive and diverse catalog. From “Maria Tambien” to “The Infamous Bill,” the show had moments of crowd-pleasing while incorporating influences, interpolations and covers of other songs. While putting the audience in a trance with a fusion of musical elements from their catalog and tracks they pulled from other artists, what kept everyone’s attention on stage was the visual eye candy of the set. With three silver platforms reminis-
cent of spaceships along with two large disco balls hanging on either side of the set, the stage was illuminated with fascinating color and light that accompanied the motifs of their performance. During their entry and occasional promenades to center stage, they displayed their dazzling outfit designs as well. With Mark Speer donning his classic bangs wig and 70s suit and DJ’s outfit with his statement hat, it truly was the visu-
als that shined throughout the show. In an exclusive interview with Lee, she gushed about the set and outfits. “The outfit set up is an entire job. I wear two different outfits a night and I never repeat. For a tour of 30 shows that’s 60 outfits along with backups, and it’s an entire situation. That along with the changeover time between the set and encore makes it interesting.” The time in between for the band members was most definitely rushed, but for the audience, they were waiting with anticipation for the encore. When the members finally appeared on stage once again, Lee stole the show with a Cucculelli Shaheen dress that shone bright and caused a temporary pause from the songs and sole focus on the breathtaking sight of the silver dress. Even though the encore was a completely different aesthetic, the sounds were still the soothing melodies the audience was used to hearing. The incorporation of diametrically opposing elements is not unfamiliar to Khruangbin though. With people dancing, swaying or standing in awe, it’s clear I wasn’t the only one taken by their infectious vibes. With Khruangbin, it’s more than music they want to share. At the crossroads of culture, creativity, collaboration and curation, they exemplify a new form of music that is free from tradition and genre.
The Nicest Kids in Town stop by the Overture Center By Emily Knepple STAFF WRITER
Broadway lovers and Madisonians alike had the chance to catch “Hairspray” at the Overture Center for the Arts from Feb. 22-27. Based in Baltimore in the 1960s, “Hairspray” follows 16-year-old Tracy Turnblad as she dances her way onto TV and into the heart of Link Larkin, a teen icon akin to 2010’s Bieber fever. “Hairspray” is notoriously a funfilled show and gained popularity after the 2007 movie adaptation. The movie cast included a star-studded lineup with Nikki Blonsky as Tracy, Zac Efron as Link, John Travolta as Edna Turnblad, Christopher Walken as Wilbur Turnblad and Amanda Bynes as Tracy’s best friend, Penny. From the opening number “Good Morning Baltimore” to everyone’s long-drive, go-to broadway belter “Without Love,” “Hairspray” brought big hair to the big screen and Madison! One of the best parts of theater is the atmosphere created. Walking into the Overture and seeing “Hairspray” posters and themed cocktails available at the bar, in a way, established a vibrant sense of community. A community that includes anyone from infant age to someone well into adulthood. Theater knows no bounds. The touring cast of “Hairspray” quickly established themselves with a strong opening number and a set
that illuminated their every move. My friend and I gushed about the set during intermission, on the walk home and to our roommates, who so pleasantly made it clear that they understood after our tenth iteration. What’s fun about Broadway is that with a few, distinct staple pieces, you have created your playground. I’ve spent a few days thinking about how touring Broadway shows have to decide what stays and what goes when designing a transportable set. “Hairspray” missed no beats though, even recreating the hairspray bottles. As a determined supporter of women in the arts, I’m quick to admit that the female performers carried this show. Niki Metclaff brought a loud and proud voice that paired well with Tracy’s overall determination to do anything, regardless of what’s standing in her way. Runner-up of Season 18 of NBC’s “The Voice” Toneisha Harris played Motormouth Maybelle and delivered with defining vocals and a tear-jerker performance of “I Know Where I’ve Been.” In the original 1988 “Hairspray” film, the role of Edna Turnblad was played by a drag queen and has been since. In the 2007 movie, John Travolta took over the role and stole the show. Edna stole the show this time around, too. Edna is played by Andrew Levitt, who people might know as Nina West. West became famous after appearing on the elev-
ORIGINAL HAIRSPRAY BROADWAY PLAYBILL/PLAYBILL
Hairspray is an American musical set in 1962 Baltimore, MD. The production follows teenage Tracy Turnblad and her dream to dance on The Corny Collins Show, a local TV dance program. When Tracy wins a role on the show, she becomes a celebrity overnight, leading to social change and the show’s integration. enth season of RuPaul’s Drag Race. West was the leading force behind the show’s humor, with funny one-liners and a dramatic change in wardrobe. Edna gets Hairsprayified halfway through the show, à la “Welcome to the ‘60s.” Of course, at its heart, the show is a great commentary on motherdaughter relationships. But, one of the show’s most redeeming characters is Wilbur, Tracy’s father and Edna’s husband. Not only is he the owner of the local tricks shop, but
he’s also Tracy and Edna’s #1 fan. He encourages Tracy to cut school and audition for the Corny Collins show. During “Timeless to Me,” Edna and Wilbur profess their unwavering love for one another while dancing across the stage and throwing around funny ad-libs that landed well with the crowd. Everyone around me during this performance was dying of laughter, even the cute, old couple in front of me. The show has faced a fair share of criticism over the years. One of
the biggest plot points is Tracy’s attempt to desegregate the Corny Collins Show through protests and heartfelt musical numbers. Many argue that “Hairspray” whitewashes the Civil Rights Movement, and lets Tracy pose as the leader. The show confuses teenage insecurity with racial injustice. It is a solid dramatic artistic attempt that has the right intentions but misses the mark. But, the “Hairspray” cast brought their best effort and delivered a run of delightful performances.
sports Battle for the Big Ten crown tips off in Indy l
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dailycardinal.com
Thursday, March 10, 2022
By Christian Voskuil SPORTS EDITOR
The Wisconsin Badgers men’s basketball team (15-5 Big Ten, 24-6 overall) hopes to capture the Big Ten’s conference championship this weekend after letting the regularseason title slip from their grasp. Wisconsin enters the tournament as the two seed after splitting the Big Ten crown with Illinois in the regular season and losing the tiebreaker to the Illini thanks to an 80-67 defeat in Champaign on Feb. 2. The Badgers had a chance to take the outright title on the last day of the regular season, but an upset loss to last-place Nebraska at home and an Illinois comeback win over Iowa declared Wisconsin and the Illini co-champions, giving Illinois the top seed in the tournament. Still, as one of the top four seeds in the tournament, the Badgers earned a double-bye, meaning they won’t play until Friday night as the rest of play unfolds around them on Wednesday and Thursday. Play opened up on Wednesday with the four bottom feeders of the Big Ten facing off against each other with the Northwestern Wildcats coming from behind to beat the aforementioned Cornhuskers to kick off the tournament before Minnesota took on Penn State to round out the night’s events. Thursday’s games will start at 10:30 a.m. with Indiana taking on Michigan with head coach Juwan Howard being reinstated by the team following his five-game suspension for his involvement in the Feb. 20 fight following Wisconsin’s defeat over the Wolverines. In Howard’s absence, Michigan went 3-2, including wins over rivals Michigan State and Ohio State to earn the Wolverines the eighth seed in the Big Ten. Indiana enters
tournament play trending down, having lost seven of their last nine games, including a home loss — and a wave goodbye from Johnny Davis — to the Badgers on Feb. 15. The winner here will get the chance to face the topseeded Illini in the first of Friday’s games. Unsurprisingly, the two teams went a combined 0-3 against Illinois. Iowa and Northwestern will play each other in the second matchup on Thursday, tipping off approximately 30 minutes after the first game’s conclusion. Iowa is public enemy no. 1 for Wisconsin fans after the Hawkeyes blew a lead that was 15 points at its highest to Illinois, giving the Illini the one seed and keeping the Badgers from getting the one seed in the Big Ten Tournament. Iowa’s Keegan Murray was recently named a Wooden Award finalist and will surely put on a show against one of the worst teams in the conference. Maryland and Michigan State will get the afternoon session underway at 5:30 p.m., with the winner facing Wisconsin in the quarterfinals. Michigan State and Maryland played each other in the season finale on March 6, where the Spartans took down the Terrapins 77-67 at home. It was Sparty’s second win of the season over Maryland, with Tom Izzo’s squad taking down Maryland in College Park 65-63 thanks to a Malik Hall layup with four seconds left. The Badgers went 2-1 combined against the two teams this year, splitting two games against MSU — with each home team winning the respective matchup — and pulling out a narrow 70-69 win at Maryland back in January thanks to a careerhigh 21 points from Tyler Wahl. The final second-round matchup will see Ohio State take on the winner of Minnesota and Penn State about 30
minutes after the Maryland-Michigan State game. The Buckeyes have struggled as of late, splitting their last six games, including the loss to rival Michigan on senior day and another loss to a much weaker (to put it nicely) Nebraska squad. The good news for Ohio State, though, is they have beaten both teams twice this year and should be good no matter which team pulls it out. Talking about the semifinals and championship game matchups is tougher to do from this far out but assuming the better seeds win, we’ll give the hypothetical wins to Illinois over Michigan, Rutgers over Iowa, Wisconsin over Michigan State and Purdue over Ohio State. Those results would give semifinal games between Illinois and Rutgers and Wisconsin and Purdue. Illinois and Rutgers split their meetings this season, with the Illini dismantling the Scarlet Knights 86-51 back in early December and Rutgers getting their revenge in February with a 70-59 win at the RAC. The key difference between the two games was Rutgers starters, especially Ron Harper Jr. In the December loss, the starters combined for 32 total points between them and only five points on one made basket from Harper Jr. In the rematch, the Scarlet Knight had four starters in double figures, 62 total points and 16 from Harper Jr. The team from Piscataway will need those core five to play to that level if they hope to take down the best in the conference. In the other semifinal game between *likely* Wisconsin and Purdue, we see one of the best mono e mono matchups in the Big Ten and even the country. In both games this season — with Wisconsin coming out as victors in each — the Boilermakers’
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Brad Davison will lead the Badgers into his fifth Big Ten Tournament this weekend. Wisconsin will enter the tournament as the two seed. Jaden Ivey and the Badgers’ Davis guarded each other and put on a show we will probably see next year in the NBA. In the teams’ last meeting, Ivey edged Davis in the scoring column 22-16, but a last-second three by Badger freshman guard Chucky Hepburn gave Wisconsin the win and a share of the Big Ten title. Beating a team like Purdue three times in one season is a tall task for any team — especially in Purdue’s home state — but if we assume yet again that the better-seeded teams will prevail, the championship matchup between Wisconsin and Illinois will be a juicy one.
With the winner likely getting at least a two seed, if not a one seed, in the national tournament, you can bet that an Illinois-Wisconsin battle for the Big Ten Tournament crown would be a must-see event. The Illini took down the Badgers in the team’s only meeting at Illinois, so one can assume the Badgers would love a rematch for the official Big Ten champion. No matter who comes out on top of the Big Ten, though, you can bet that it’ll be a great tournament as the best conference in college basketball looks to crown a king before the big dance. You can catch all the games live and in color on the Big Ten Network.
Vile clinches a win in thrilling fashion to push Wisconsin over Western Michigan By Donnie Slusher SPORTS WRITER
ISABELLA KELLERMEIER/THE DAILY CARDINAL
Wisconsin pulled out a narrow victory over Western Michigan Saturday.
The Wisconsin Badgers defeated the Western Michigan Broncos, 4-3, in the Nielsen Tennis Stadium Saturday afternoon. With the help of a matchsecuring victory by Sebastian Vile, the Badgers improved to 6-5 on the season, while the Broncos fell to 4-6. Saturday’s match was the first home game for the Badgers after nearly a month on the road. They were also coming off of a loss against Washington on Feb. 27. Wisconsin has only won one of their last four, but the lone win was against No. 42 ranked Oregon. The Badgers have been on a fantastic doubles streak as of late, securing the point against their last three opponents: Penn, Oregon and Washington. Leading these victories was the dominant duo of Jared Pratt and Daniel Nuzhny (6-1, Oregon; 6-2, Penn; 6-4, Washington). The Broncos entered this game after a win against Wichita State on Feb. 26. Altogether, they’ve split their most recent four games and stood with a losing record of 4-5. They also
entered this match without a single road win this year. The match began in a somewhat surprising fashion. Wisconsin failed to score their doubles point for the first time since Feb. 11’s Princeton match, with the only wins coming from Robin Parts and Sebastian Vile (6-2). This specific matchup was never really in doubt. However, the same cannot be said for the other two groups of Badgers. Western Michigan’s most crucial doubles victory came from Benjamin George and Brogan Pierce, who defeated Pratt and Nuzhny, the duo that had not lost a doubles match since Feb. 6 against Drake. As the singles portion began, the tide quickly turned in favor of the home team. Junior Gabriel Huber evened up the score following the doubles loss to secure the first singles victory of the day, a quick 6-1, 6-2 win. Sophomore Tim Dzhurinskiy was able to earn a contentious point against the Broncos’ Jackson Boone. The match was thrilling from start to finish, as Dzhurinsky was able to fight back from an early 4-1 deficit. The first set ended 7-6, followed by a 7-3
Dzhurinsky victory in the tiebreaker, before Boone fell in the second set, 6-4. The matchup of the day was between George and Vile, the only singles competition all day to require a third-round tiebreaker. Thus, the match ran the latest, so all eyes in Nielsen were on Vile. And the senior did not disappoint. After suffering a 6-3 loss in his first set, Vile evened up the score with a 6-3 victory of his own. With the fate of the match on the line in the third set, Vile defeated George convincingly, 6-2, to secure the Badger win at home. Wisconsin exhibited strong resilience following their first doubles point loss in weeks by controlling the singles portion, earning a collective 4-2 record. I would expect their doubles play to bounce back in the next few matches, specifically the aforementioned team of Pratt and Nuzhny, who were on an impressive streak prior to this match. Next for the Badgers is a trip to San Diego for some weekday matches. The first on Tuesday, May 15, against Harvard, followed by a Thursday, May 17 match vs. San Diego.
opinion How social media changed beauty culture dailycardinal.com
By Priyanka Vasavan STAFF WRITER
At around nine, I visited the Minneapolis Institute of Art. A fountain stood in the middle of the halls, carved from cold white granite. The light that shone on it awoke a spiritual sentiment in me. My mother handed me a penny and I grasped it tightly — so tightly — and for so long that sweat began to pool at the crevices of my knuckles. I then tossed it into the pool of water, a breath releasing from me. The light seemingly intensified, God must have heard my anguish. My wish was simple: to be prettier and skinnier. As an afterthought, I included an end to world hunger. God would appreciate my selflessness. At that point, no one had told me that I needed to make any drastic changes to my appearance. But I had begun to notice some alarmingly substantial connections between beauty and social approval. It seemed to me that the more attractive you were the more leeway you got. I couldn’t afford to talk about my affinity for frogs because I was busy trying to compensate for my unibrow. I wanted that leeway. It was exhausting relying solely on my personality to be liked, and thus far it hadn’t worked. Our preoccupation with appearances is most obviously a byproduct of the culture surrounding beauty to which we have been subjected. That
Thursday, March 10, 2022
culture has been created and recreated, evolved and devolved — from child-bearing hips in the renaissance to waifish Kate Moss and to whatever conglomeration of restrictions and additions to our bodies the internet has fed us. That culture has seeped into every aspect of our lives from the products we buy to the way we talk and think. That is to say, the internet is not the problem for modern-day insecurities. Women have been convinced their value is equated to the visual enjoyment of others before AOL.com. But it is certainly a vehicle. Pre-social media you might have walked into a Stop N Shop and picked up a Vogue that documented all the ways you could look like Brooke Shields. Now you can sit on your couch and scroll through thousands of girls who look nothing like you and then proceed to scroll through thousands of comments telling them they are some synonym to perfection. The sentiment is consistent. Technology has just made inadequacy more accessible. This accessibility is the issue. Already it has taken recent years to unlearn the ideology that the more beautiful I am the more worthy I am of love and respect. And I didn’t grow up in the age of TikTok: where new trends involving beauty standards surface every week, from showcasing how perfectly your nose slopes to how flat your stomach gets in the morning. The videos
are all synthesized with trendy music to distract you from the implications. This isn’t surprising considering TikTok’s algorithm was initially programmed to promote more conventionally attractive people. Because social media is new, so is the research involving the ramifications. But viewing
correlation. One thing is certain, people are fascinated by beauty. Clear skin, sharp cheekbones, big eyes, small nose — all these God-given features can result in early retirement for popular TikTokers. That doesn’t even touch on how painfully eurocentric these standards are. But to claim women tak-
PHOTO COURTESY OF CDOROBEK / CREATIVE COMMONS
a constant influx of reverence for women who check certain standards inevitably creates insecurity in those who don’t — especially in young, impressionable girls who are a large portion of the demographic viewing these videos. State attorneys have recently opened an investigation into the app and its effects on mental health. With megastars who are commended solely for their beauty, it is not hard to see the
ing advantage of their beauty is inherently wrong is placing blame on the prairie, not the fire. Our importance is embedded in our beauty. It is a commodifiable asset. As a gender, we simply picked up on our civilization’s demands — a form of social evolution. If we can’t change the source, because we weren’t in power in the first place, then we can change the way we respond to our role. We can take full own-
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ership of it. So what now? How do we distance ourselves from the jarring imposition that beauty culture has had on our psyche? Is it even possible to do so given society itself ? Deleting social media doesn’t erase the culture. But it can help slow the impact. Spending less time on my phone and more time in my immediate, physical world doesn’t miraculously cure me of all insecurities, but it can help wean me off the rabbit hole that is comparison. As for the world beyond the screen? An erasure of the importance of beauty would involve a cultural revolution — or an eternal mask mandate. However, on a more feasible note, we can consciously try to outweigh external factors with internal ones: on a personal level, and in the broader community. We can try to dissociate ourselves from the worth we place on the body and exert that effort on mind and soul. We might be unable to compromise with the demands society has of women, but we can attempt to process the aftermath reflected in the demands we have of ourselves.
Priyanka Vasavan is a freshman studying marketing and finance. Do you agree that social media perpetuates harmful beauty standards on young girls? Send all comments to opinion@dailycardinal.com.
The electric lie: How electric cars face environmental issues By Jeffrey Brown STAFF WRITER
A study published in September of 2021 states people below the age of 40 will see natural disasters of unprecedented intensity and frequency. If you aren’t scared, you should be. Look around at life in the US and understand this is not normal, not sustainable, and needs to change if we want to minimize destruction and suffering in the present — let alone the future. At the center of the conversation of “going green” has been switching over to fully electric vehicles. Through a certain lense, this makes sense. Electric cars appear to be the most seamless transition for the dayto-day transportation needs of most Americans. Part of this perception are the marketing campaigns which make electric cars seem like a nobrainer environmental win. After all, they don’t burn gas. Nevertheless, being environmentally sustainable is so much more than not burning gas. For this, electric cars are not the solution. They will continue to pollute the air, destroy ecosystems and do a great deal of harm — especially to those most vulnerable. While electric vehicles get rid of gasoline emissions, much of the damage to air quality isn’t from the fumes. It’s from tires. Yes, carbon dioxide is no longer released when the car no longer burns gas, but electric cars still contain treads and brake pads that, when worn down, break into tiny particles harming air quality.
Although, we’re only scratching the surface. Lithium, nickel and cobalt are the three major components in rechargeable batteries that are, by definition, nonrenewable resources. But at least they’re not oil, right? You may recall the Deepwater Horizon oil spill of 2010 or the fire in the middle of the ocean in July of last year. Since just 2011, Shell has reported over 1000 oil spills in the Niger Delta alone. These spills add up to around 4.6 million gallons of oil which have poisoned their waters, killed their crops and livestock and demolished the ecosystem. All of these are great reasons to move away from oil reliance — but is lithium mining used for electric cars any better? Lithium mining is done by pumping lithium-rich brine from underground deposits to fill large pools to evaporate the water off. Today’s demand for lithium has already created around 30 square miles of these mines and pools in northern Chile where ecosystems used to be. While a cellphone needs around a quarter of an ounce of what is called “lithium carbonate equivalent,” the battery of an electric car such as a higher-end Tesla requires as much as 180 pounds. Sit with those numbers for a second. Imagine how much more lithium will be needed to create enough electric cars for everyone to switch. Estimates for the next 20 years have the lithium demand multiplying by around 40 times. If 40 times the demand means mining expands
by 40 times, those 30 square miles become 1,200 square miles. This is an area larger than Rhode Island that would be entirely devoted to mining lithium. Furthermore, over half of the world’s cobalt comes from the Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC) where an estimated 40,000 children as young as seven work in mines for a mere $1-2 per day. These kids are not given gloves or masks despite direct cobalt contact — which can be fatal. A 2019 lawsuit brought against numerous corporations including the electric car icon of Tesla alleges companies knowingly acquiring resources from areas with such inhumane child labor conditions. Again, imagine what will happen to these communities as demand for cobalt only increases. In addition, while Shell may no longer be spilling oil in the Niger Delta, lithium and the byproducts of its mining are dangerous if leaked in drinking water or agriculture irrigation. Ultimately, switching from gas to electric cars — which means switching from oil to lithium and cobalt — does not alter international power imbalance. Nothing will be different for vulnerable people in developing nations whose homes and lives will continue to be destroyed for the benefit of US businesses. Even though some claim electric cars may be the future, they do not prevent preventable car crashes. Over 38,000 people in the US die in car crashes each year. That’s over 100 people every day. No, self-driv-
PHOTO BY DRAKE WHITE-BERGEY
ing cars aren’t the solution to this devastating truth. Humans can barely drive safely as it is. How can we expect electric cars to operate safely on prewritten code? Currently, Tesla’s “autopilot mode” — which intends to center the car in its lane and keep itself a safe distance from the car in front of it — “[has] had difficulty identifying emergency vehicles with flashing lights, flares, illuminated arrow boards, or traffic cones near them.” An 18 minute video of a Tesla owner testing the ‘Full Self Driving’ feature exhibits the many faults in this feature that Elon Musk has promised would be complete within a year for 9 years in a row. And what happens if the car hits someone? Lines of code cannot be held accountable in the event of a mistake that ends in death. This should not be the future we build towards. So what is the solution? We’ve
learned about how harmful electric vehicles will be if that is our future, but what else can be done? The U.S. is unique in its reliance on personal vehicles. In most places, it is incredibly difficult, if not impossible, to get anywhere without your own car. There are 816 cars in the US for every 1000 people. For comparison, Canada has 685, Japan has 590, France has 482, the UK has 473 and China has 214. If China had car ownership at the rate of the US, there would be over 840 million more cars in existence. Our reality of everyone owning their own car is ridiculous when you think about it. In truth, personal car ownership is unsustainable whether they run on gasoline or batteries. What we need is investments in public transportation as well as reshape our cities and towns to be based on people, not cars.
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Life & Style Ways to help the people of Ukraine today l
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Thursday, March 10, 2022
By Hina Suzuki STAFF WRITER
The impact of the Russian invasion of Ukraine has been beyond devastating. The conflict continues to escalate, and so does the people of Ukraine’s need for help. Since Russia first launched its invasion on Feb. 24, over 1.5 million people have fled Ukraine for safety to their neighboring countries, according to the United Nations Refugee Agency. Meanwhile, civilians of Ukraine — including children — remain in the country, taking shelter in subway tunnels and other secure areas. They are facing belowfreezing temperatures and have little water and food. If you are watching the
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conflict unfold, you may be wondering how you can support the people of Ukraine. Here are ways you can help. Direct Relief Direct Relief is a U.S.based humanitarian organization that distributes donated medical supplies. The organization is working with Ukraine’s Ministry of Health, the U.N. and local NGOs to provide needed medical aid as they become known. The organization is currently working to deliver items on the list Ukraine’s Ministry of Health sent last weekend. Donations for Direct Relief can be made at www.directrelief.org/place/ ukraine/.
The Kyiv Independent Journalists at the Kyiv Independent have been covering and offering the world constant updates of the war as they fear for themselves. The newspaper has promoted a GoFundMe, “Keep Ukraine’s media going,” to help journalists in Ukraine relocate and continue their jobs from neighboring countries. Save the Children Save the Children is a humanitarian organization for children, founded more than a century ago. The organization has been helping local organizations in Ukraine stock up on food, water, hygiene kits and winter clothes over the past year. On its website, www.
savethechildren.org, you can learn about how your donation helps the children in Ukraine. For example, $50 can prevent three children from going hungry for a month. Mercy Corps Mercy Corps is a global team of humanitarians working in more than 40 countries. They are sending aid workers to Romania and Poland along the Ukrainian border to assess the most urgent humanitarian needs. On its donation page, they say that they are particularly concerned about the elderly and people with disabilities who are still in Ukraine. Attend protests Over the past week, pro-
testers around the world have marched in streets and city squares with blue-andyellow flags to demonstrate solidarity with Ukraine — researchers and students have also led demonstrations on campus. The website www.stopputin.net lists forthcoming demonstrations against the war. Write to your congressperson Voice your views on the Russian invasion and share your ideas on how we can stand behind Ukrainians fighting for their freedom. On the United States House of Representatives website, you can use your zip code to find your local representative.
Best study locations for midterms on campus By Colby Bellaman STAFF WRITER
DRAKE WHITE-BERGEY/DAILY CARDINAL
Whether you are on State Street or across the country, there are ways to help out Ukraine.
Reminder: love yourself selfishly By Hannah Rifkin STAFF WRITER
This year I was told that I am at the point where I can be selfish in my life, that there would be no better time. This thought scared me. My whole life I had been taught to consider others first and that selfishness was an ugly trait. As I took time to process the idea of being selfish, I realized it made sense. I identify as a full-time college student with a part-time job who finds comfort in relying on themselves. This sentiment remains true in all aspects of my life. To explain it further: School is a personal commitment. I choose to put time and effort into my academics in a way I feel is best. The degree I work toward and what I learn is an investment in myself and the future impact I aspire to make. I am fortunate to have a job that provides me with an opportunity to extend
my independence. However, when I clock out, I leave the responsibilities of the office to do whatever I choose with my time. Lastly, I rely on myself emotionally and find peace in the idea of being self-sufficient. These factors don’t dismiss the value of commitments to friends and family, my morals or an impulse to put others before myself. Instead, my current position allows me the opportunity to choose myself more often and with freedom. Selfishness is an option, and it’s not always the wrong option, despite what society has told us. We believe putting ourselves first means disregarding others when it is quite the contrary. We won’t be able to truly help others if we are not taken care of first. You can’t support others with an overworked and fractured body. An excess of selflessness will only perpetuate the negative implication
of selfishness we all know. We’re willing to put love, energy and time into relationships with others but believe ourselves to be less than worthy. If you’re willing to go out of your way and help a friend in need, you have to be open to giving yourself that same consideration. Making decisions that will help us revive ourselves will ensure that when someone else needs our energy and love we can give it to them unconditionally. The statement that I can be selfish wasn’t promoting overindulgence but instead asking that I try not to shy from it at a time where choosing myself and choosing others isn’t a rigid line. Selfishness is powerful, but there will be a time when our choices are entangled with others and the line becomes clear. So take time, build selfish habits and protect yourself so you can protect others around you.
With midterm season fast approaching, students are eager to get out of their dorm or apartment and find new places to study. Here are some of the best study spots in Madison to get students out of their mid semester slump and ready for midterms! There are many factors to consider when picking the best study spots. Sometimes students want to be somewhere they can collaborate with their peers; other times they need complete silence. They also might want to get a snack or coffee while studying. These factors can determine whether students can study effectively. In almost every building on campus there are plenty of study spaces. There are the common
spots such as College Library or Memorial Union. However, sometimes students need a change from the usual crowded spots. Some other alternatives include the Discovery Building on University Avenue, which has great seating and a spacious open layout. Additionally, it has a cafe inside and is generally pretty quiet. This is the perfect place to get away and study quietly all day. The School of Human Ecology (SOHE) is another great spot on campus with a coffee shop and plenty of tables to eat and study at. The building has unique murals and decor, making it the ideal spot to study with a friend or two. Coffee shops tend
to be great off campus study spots and are only a short walk down State Street. Some of the best ones downtown include Fair Trade Coffee House, Ancora Cafe + Bakery and Wonderstate Coffee. These coffee shops all have a variety of food and drinks, along with a great atmosphere. They are a little bit louder than on campus study spots, which make them the perfect place to do work with a friend or get some lunch while catching up on some homework. Many students start to lose steam and fall behind in their classes as spring break gets closer. However, sometimes all it takes is going out and finding a new place to study to get through one more week!
DRAKE WHITE-BERGEY/DAILY CARDINAL
They Discovery Building is one of many great locations to study, grab a bite to eat or hang out.
science dailycardinal.com
Thursday, March 10, 2022
Matryoshka of Terror: Parasitoids By Julia Wiessing STAFF WRITER
Let me establish something right off the bat: I do not like parasites. I find them creepy and unsettling; thoughts of bot-flies and ticks haunt my dreams. Despite studying insects, I have staunchly avoided any classes that could put me in contact with something that wants to burrow under my skin. But, even if I would like to social distance from just about all parasites, I have to admit, some of them are kind of cool. As an aspiring hymenopterist — someone who studies bees, wasps and ants — parasites are plentiful and prolific in my field. There are over half a million species of parasitic and parasitoidic wasps, each stranger than the next. Parasites are organisms that live on or in a host or host colony and benefit at their expense. Parasites range from blood sucking ticks and lice to kleptoparasites who steal the hardwon food of other organisms and social parasites that kidnap organisms to support their community. The key thing about parasites is that having one doesn’t necessarily mean you’re going to die. It’s in the parasite’s best interest to keep you alive as long as possible. If you have a parasitoid, however, you’re out of luck. Parasitoids will eventually kill their hosts, generally when their larvae — oftentimes laid inside the host — grow into adults. Thankfully, parasitoidic organisms are (usually) insects that target other insects. As we delved into parasites in my Intro to Entomology class, I had a lot of questions. Chief among them being: Could parasites have parasites? The answer is, absolutely! In fact, even a parasitoid can have a parasitoid, who in turn has a parasitoid … You get the picture. These Russian nesting dolls of the parasite world live on the caterpillars of cabbage butterflies. Cabbage butterflies, while native to Eurasia, were accidentally introduced to North America in 1860, and spread like wildfire. Cabbage butterflies are extremely common in Wisconsin; you’ve probably seen them flit around flower bushes and tall grasses. While these butterflies look like nothing more than harmless, stumbling white cotton balls flying around in the summer breeze, their caterpillars, known as cabbage worms, chow down on broccoli, cabbage and cauliflower. The standards
for these plants are notoriously high, and cabbage worm damage causes swaths of fresh produce to be unsellable. Enter Cotesia glomerata. C. glomerata, otherwise known as the glomerata wasp, is a small wasp in the family Ichneumonidae and a primary parasitoid of cabbageworms. When a plant is being gnawed on by a cabbageworm, it sends a chemical distress signal that attracts glomerata wasps. Then, like a scene from a low-budget horror movie, the glomerata wasp stings the cabbageworms, laying her eggs inside the defenseless caterpillars. The wasp larvae develop inside the caterpillar, slowly eating it from the inside out, but make sure to keep the caterpillar alive. When they get big enough to pupate, the larvae use sharp teeth to poke holes in the side of their cabbageworm host. They then form cocoons on the cabbageworm’s body — cocoons that the cabbage worm will never be able to build themselves. At this point, the cabbage worm is still alive, under a form of insect mind control. The cabbage worm will protect the glomerata wasps cocoons until it’s final hour. The plant’s distress signal, however, doesn’t just attract glomerata wasps. Other opportunistic parasitoids are looking for a place to lay their eggs. Lysibia nana, another species of parasitoid wasp, are on the hunt for glomerata wasp cocoons. While the adult females exclusively feed on nectar, the larvae are secondary parasitoids, developing on glomerata wasp larvae while they are parasitizing cabbage worms. While the original host is still alive, the L. nana female will lay her eggs inside the glomerata wasp cocoons. As she lays her eggs she releases a paralytic agent into the glomerata wasp pupae, halting its development. These new moms, however, have to be fast. The survival rate of their young drops drastically when the glomerata wasp larvae are more than two days old. If she can lay her eggs before that point, the L. nana larvae will have an 80% chance to survive to adulthood. When the L. nana adults emerge from the glomerata wasp cocoons, they will be a similar size to their glomerata wasp counterparts. If you know anything about trophic levels, this may seem confusing. As energy moves through an ecosystem, through plants, to herbivores, to predators, some of that energy is lost. About 10% of the energy is stored as body mass, while the rest is used for bodily functions and expelled as
heat. For example, a cabbage plant may store 1,000 Kcal of energy. The animal that eats it, such as a cabbage worm, acts as the primary consumer and will retain 100 kcal of energy. The organism that eats the cabbage worm, the secondary consumer, will retain 10 kcal of energy. Therefore, the tertiary consumer will only retain 1 kcal of energy, a huge loss. If L. nana are only getting a small fraction of energy their glomerata hosts are getting, they logically shouldn’t be able to grow to their size. Parasites, however, have a way of getting around this pesky energy problem. The first is simple; they don’t do a whole lot besides, yanno, destroying the sanctity of their host’s body. Parasitoid larvae are largely sessile, fixed in one place and unmoving, and practically have a whole buffet in front of them. Inside a host, all they have to do is eat; no energy is wasted on movement, development or defense. What a dream. Another reason why parasitoids are incredibly efficient is they actually change the chemical composition of their host to suit their needs. During the process of parasitism, the nutrients, fats and minerals found in the parasite’s host are altered to uniquely benefit the parasite or parasitoid. This is how the L. nana wasps can grow as big as their host on such limited resources. These strategies open up a whole new world of parasitoidic possibilities, not just for L. nana. For cabbage worms, it means they get another layer of parasites stacked on top of them. Gelis agilis are tiny, wingless wasps that spend their adult lives pretending to be ants. This disguise allows them to travel the insect world largely unharmed, as ants are considered aggressive and unpalatable. G. agilis can be either secondary or tertiary parasitoids; the female will either lay her eggs in the primary parasitoid, glomerata wasp pupae or the secondary parasitoid, L. nana larvae. These wasps are so evolutionarily fit for dealing with limited resources that the secondary and tertiary parasitoidic larvae of G. agilis will grow to similar sizes, indistinguishable as adults. We still don’t know how deep the parasitism wormhole goes. There is a very real possibility that there could be even more layers of parasitism — imagine finding a parasitoid within a parasitoid within a parasitoid within a parasitoid; an astonishing feat of evolution. Fascinating, as long as they’re not burrowing under your skin.
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I just think they're neat: Dolphins
COURTESY OF WIKIMEDIA COMMONS
K-dog, a U.S. Marine dolphin, was equipped with a locator to perform mine clearance work in the Persian Gulf.
By Emily Rohloff SCIENCE EDITOR
As spring break is approaching and many students begin to head down south, one favorite that everyone associates with the ocean and the warmth is … dolphins! Dolphins are unique aquatic mammals, who are some of the most intelligent, socially skilled, playful creatures in the animal kingdom. There are currently 49 known dolphin and porpoise species, which are grouped into six families: the oceanic family, the porpoise family and the four river families. While dolphins have the ability to live in seas, oceans and rivers, most prefer tropical and warm temperatures as it is easier for them to regulate their body temperature. Dolphins share a lot of emotional similarity to humans. S c i e nt i st s h ave researched and discovered an aligning trend between humans’ and dolphins’ curiosity and sociability. Dolphins, like the majority of primates, have brains that are considerably larger than what their bodies require for basic functions. This excess of brain material is what provides dolphins the ability for higher intelligence, sociability and curiosity. They share human’s form of social setting and communication, as dolphins travel in groups, called pods. These pods can consist of numbers ranging from 2 to 30 dolphins, with some merging into superpods with more than 1,000 members! Dolphins depend on these pods for hunting, mating and defending themselves
from predators. Another similarity to humans, researchers have found, is that dolphins are not bound to any one pod — they can swim and go as they please. While most pods do have an established hierarchy, the composition and structure of the pod can depend on age, sex, family ties and reproductive condition. There are three types of pods dolphins can join: nursery groups (mothers-offspring), juvenile groups and adult males. While males are dominant in every group, they most often give space to the nursery groups consisting of mothers and their offspring. The social relationships that build between dolphins, scientists have come to find, is a lifelong relationship. The social aspects of these mammals mimic our own in many ways. Researchers have even discovered that dolphins are able to speak to each other in different dialects! However, due to recent pollution, urbanization, harmful nets of fishermen and human-caused climate change, dolphins numbers are being reduced. In 2006, the very first dolphin went extinct — the baiji dolphin. And the Vaquita will be next if human made dangers continue to affect them. So as people travel down south for spring break, remember to be respectful to nature and aquatic life, clean up after yourselves and help protect the environments of sea creatures like dolphins.
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almanac Geraldine of ‘Geraldine’s Pick’ named next UW-Madison chancellor l
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Thursday, March 10, 2022
Mackenzie Moore ALMANAC EDITOR
Geraldine Moser of the University Book Store’s “Geraldine’s Pick” celebrated her 82nd birthday on March 2. A big milestone in itself, a new statement from the University of Wisconsin-Madison indicates that the campus icon received more than well-wishes and a piece of cake on her big day. “On March 2, Geraldine Moser was informed that she will replace Rebecca Blank as the next chancellor in the storied history of the University of WisconsinMadison. Having worked on campus for 35 years, Moser was clearly the most qualified candidate. Further, her extensive experience working hands-on with students, staff and the whole Badger community makes her the ideal representative of the university.” There’s more to Geraldine’s
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résumé than the statement lets on. According to a Daily Cardinal article from Nov. 2021, prior to joining the University Book Store in 1987, she had careers as a nurse and, later on, a midwife. This makes her well equipped for handling drunk students falling down stairs and young couples who find out that they were way too confident in their pull-out game — both daily occurrences on campus. Unlike past chancellors, Geraldine will not be sitting in a cushy office in Bascom Hall. Rather, the office is coming right to the University Book Store. Moser has also elected not to move into the chancellor’s official residence, formally known as the Olin House. Instead, funds have been allocated to replace the cot she keeps in the break room with a Tempur-Pedic mattress. In addition, Moser will also be add-
ZOE BENDOFF/THE DAILY CARDINAL
ing framed photos of her memories at the Book Store over the decades, her Presidential Medal of Freedom, a mahogany cabinet with a shit ton of Jameson in it
Fun ways to spend spring break without traveling
and a brand-new microwave so she can get her popcorn fix whenever the craving arises. The Daily Cardinal attempted to contact Geraldine about her
Sen. Marco Rubio confirmed to be direct descendant of Judas Mackenzie Moore ALMANAC EDITOR
Courtesy of ktpupp via Creative Commons By Mackenzie Moore ALMANAC EDITOR
With spring break beginning this weekend, many students can be overheard talking about their travel plans. However, this is not the case for everyone; some simply don’t like to travel, while others — especially the poors — are unable to take time off of work or can’t afford the price of gas for a road trip, let alone a plane ticket. Luckily, your friends at the Almanac have some no-travel-required spring break tips that will make you say “Hawaii is still part of these United States? Well hell’s bells, let’s sell it for scrap.” 1. Put a slice of pineapple on a hamburger bun. This tip actually originated with McDonald’s in the 1960’s as an option for Catholics who couldn’t eat meat on Fridays during Lent. It happens to be Lent right now, so if you’re looking for redemption, slap a ring o’ pineapple on that white bread and be transported to Costa Rica. 2. Take off your clothes and lay in the snow. While it may take longer, it’s completely possible to get a tan during the winter. Simply go outside and strip down, then you’re good to go. Depending on the temperature, you may get frostbite before reaching a visible tan, but in any case, your skin will change color. 3. Provoke an alligator at the zoo. Given Henry Vilas Zoo’s convenient location in relation to campus, this one is a sinch. When nobody’s looking, hop into the alligator habitat and splash around — really ham it up. Then, pull a struggling gar fish out of your pocket (you may want cargo pants for this one) and let it thrash about. This will encourage the alligator to attack, evoking the true Florida experience. 4. Drink a Mai Tai in the shower. Start up a cold shower, turn up some reggae and sip on the cocktail containing rum, Curaçao liqueur, orgeat syrup and lime juice. It’ll be like a Caribbean rainstorm and you won’t have to worry about showering later on when you’re nine Mai Tais deep. 5. Haggle with the employees at Walgreens. Take yourself to an Egyptian market by negotiating prices with the cashiers at Walgreens or your store of choice. You’ll feel like you’re on a desert vacation when you’re arguing with an employee about lowering the price of a hairbrush from $25 down to $3.
thoughts on the big news, but she was unavailable, as she was saving a family of bunnies from a burning building while wearing a “Teach Me How to Bucky” t-shirt.
Sen. Marco Rubio (R-Florida) came under fire on Saturday after sharing a screenshot of Ukraine’s President Zelenskyy while a video call among lawmakers was taking place. This is despite all participants being explicitly told not to do so by the Ukrainian ambassador. Unfortunately, Rubio — as well as Montana Sen. Steve Daines — felt that Twitter likes were more important than the safety of the Ukrainian leader. Rubio’s actions could be considered a betrayal to the majority of Americans who believe that Russia’s invasion of Ukraine is unjustified. However, new information indicates that the public shouldn’t be surprised by the senator’s tweet. Unearthed ancestral documents have confirmed that Sen. Rubio is a direct descendant of Judas Iscariot, who is best known as a former apostle and ultimate betrayer of Jesus Christ. Similar to how Judas outed Jesus to the Sanhedrin for 30 pieces of silver and political gain, Marco Rubio outed Volodymyr Zelenskyy for internet points from the same people who voted for the guy that just called Putin “genius” and “savvy” for attack-
ing Ukraine on Feb. 22. Unlike Judas leading soldiers to the Garden of Gethsemane, then kissing Jesus and calling him “Rabbi ‘’ to trigger the religious leader’s arrest, Rubio posting a picture of Zelenskyy during the meeting did not blatantly indicate the President of Ukraine’s location to Russian authorities. However, given the reputation of Russian intelligence, it is akin to Judas leading soldiers to the garden and being like, “I don’t know exact-
ly where he is in this specific garden, but the guy you want to brutally and publicly execute is definitely here somewhere.” After betraying Jesus, Judas returned the silver he received and hung himself. The only way Rubio could be expected to show even a fraction of his ancestor’s remorse is if he kissed a man like Judas kissed Jesus. To be clear, Rubio may be a traitor on a global scale, but relax a little — at least he’s not gay.
Courtesy of Gage Skidmore via Creative Commons We're always looking for more funny and insightful writers with fresh takes on topics ranging from the UW campus to international news. We accept and encourage creative submissions as well! Any and all submissions are more than welcome. You can send your submissions and any comments or questions to almanac@dailycardinal.com. All articles featured in Almanac are creative, satirical and/or entirely fictional pieces. They are fully intended as such and should not be taken seriously as news.