BEAST The
August 2021
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Here’s what you need to know about the Sept 4 Council election.
Paula Masselos
Tim Tim Murray Murray
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Getting good things done. Authorised by Keri Spooner, NSW Labor, 8 Yanko Avenue Bronte 2024
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Frustrating Times for All Words James Hutton @thebeastmag Welcome to the August 2021 edition of The Beast, the monthly magazine for Sydney’s COVIDriddled beaches of the east. On that note, this publication does support the lockdown measures, as annoying as they are - if we had gone into lockdown earlier we would most probably be out of it by now. Having said that, the government’s long-term strategy has been poorly communicated and is difficult to understand, adding to the frustration. The Beast relies on advertising revenue to survive, and businesses won’t spend money on marketing if they don’t know whether or not they’ll be allowed to operate, so it’s been a bit of a shit month for us too. But we’re much safer here than
6 The Beast August 2021
we would be in just about any other country in the world, and that’s what is most important. Bondi Junction’s Iris Toren is the local artist behind this edition’s beautiful cover artwork of two ibises parading at Bronte Beach. Iris has an exhibition coming up; In Awe will run from August 5-11 at The Shop Gallery, 112 Glebe Point Road, Glebe, from 10am to 6pm (depending on COVID restrictions of course). The opening event is scheduled for Friday, August 6 and everyone is welcome. Despite these challenging times, The Beast will continue to bring you independent, objective local news. Thanks again to everyone who keeps us going. Keep your chins up. Cheers, James
The Beast The Beast Pty Ltd ABN 32 143 796 801 www.thebeast.com.au Editor james@thebeast.com.au Advertising Enquiries advertising@thebeast.com.au Rates and Specs thebeast.com.au/advertise Circulation 60,000 copies are delivered every month; 56,500 are placed in mailboxes and 3,500 in local shops. PEFC Certified The Beast uses paper from sustainably managed forests. Letters to the Editor Please send your feedback to letters@thebeast.com.au and include your name and the suburb you live in.
CONTENTS August 2021 Issue 199
6 Welcome Note
35 Tide Chart
43 Making Music
7
36 Police News
44 Dana's Recipe
8 Horse's Rant
37 Unreliable Guide
46 Local Photos
10 Monthly Mailbag
38 Marj's Musings
48 Beast Reviews
21 Beast Thumbs
40 Headnoise
49 Brainteasers
22 Local News
41 Money Matters
50 Beardy from Hell
34 Local Artist
42 Kieran's Satire
50 Trivia Solutions
Contents
Standing guard, by Alan Wang.
When will it end?
Locals Locked Out in Development Lockdown Words and Photo Duncan Horscroft Forget about the COVID-19 lockdown, the Waverley municipality has been locked down since well before the pandemic began due to the blight of never-ending development. It seems that with every corner you turn your progress is stymied by partial road closures, where traffic banks up as heavy machinery has the right of passage on main roads and, to a lesser extent, in small suburban streets. Bronte’s Macpherson Street has been a traffic nightmare since the start of the St Catherine’s School project, and add to that the chaos caused by the ripping up of the road around the corner from Arden Street. The Bronte Cutting is also another hotspot, where a new footpath is being laid, to the detriment of locals who use the 8 The Beast August 2021
beach regularly for their morning swim. No one is against progress, but when more than one major project is underway at the same time in the same area it tends to cause more than a little angst among local residents. This writer lives in a small street behind Clovelly Public School, and this street has been closed to residents three times in the past six months due to two modular homes being erected and the resurfacing of the road. And it becomes a case of ‘catch and kill your own’ when you have to relocate your vehicle in an area where parking is at a premium. It’s not just the major projects that cause the problem. Smaller projects, where there is a knockdown or major refur-
bishment, add to the woes when locals aren’t fortunate enough to have off-street parking. Unfortunately, Waverley Council no longer holds the upper hand in development approvals, nor are councillors involved in the process of development application (DA) assessments. “The state government removed councillors’ role in approving or not approving DAs,” Waverley Mayor Paula Masselos explained. “In 2014, the Waverley Development Assessment Panel (WDAP) was introduced under (former mayor) Sally Betts. Councillors still have an active role in the strategic planning vision and setting of controls and policies for the whole local government area (LGA). This includes being actively involved in reviewing, amending and introducing new policies and controls for future development in our LGA,” she said. Cr Masselos said private certifiers fall under the Exempt and Complying Development Codes (CDC), which is a fast track approval process for straightforward residential, commercial and industrial developments that must adhere to certain criteria. “Where a CDC is approved by an accredited private certifier, Council is not part of this process,” she told The Beast. Surely common sense should prevail in these situations and Waverley Council should be given back the responsibility to assess these new developments. After all, it is Council, and not the state government, that understands the needs of its residents. We have all seen the results of shonky developments in the hands of private certifiers. The last thing we need in the Waverley municipality is another Mascot Towers.
The Team that Will Listen to Residents & Put Waverley First
HUNTER WARD
1
VOTE
From Left: Cr Sally Betts Cr Will Nemesh Dov Frazer
on
WAVERLEY WARD
From Left: Cr Tony Kay Josh Spicer Kerry Pinkstone
September 4th Introducing the Experienced Waverley Liberals Contesting the Local Government Election Authorised by Travis Russell, 1 Simpson Street, Bondi NSW 2026
LAWSON WARD
From Left: Cr Angela Burrill Andrew Cusack David Plaister
BONDI WARD
From Left: Cr Leon Goltsman Brad Cole Phil Occhiuto
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The Beast's Monthly Mailbag Words The Frustrated People of the Eastern Suburbs Eastern Suburbs Bus Services CUTS TO EASTERN BEACHES BUS SERVICES Dear Beast - If the light rail was a viable option, it would be used. It adds an extra 30 minutes to every trip. We are paying for this white elephant. Transport Minister Constance told The Beast, “We are actually making this a turn up and go service.” What does this mean? Channel Nine News had a story about a similar trial in a South Coast town where commuters were forced to pay an extra $5 on top of the fare. We don’t want Uber buses! We have a good system that suits everyone including the elderly. Minister Constance must know how well the X40, 353, 338 and the others are patronised. Please do not cut our bus routes. Suzie Smith Clovelly A MESSAGE TO THE MINISTER Dear James - Andrew Constance’s “Message from the Minister” in the July edition of The Beast demands comment. How condescending is the opening comment about the government’s proposed changes to the bus system: “...change can be tough, I know that you’re used to things being a certain way, finding out that they will soon be different can be a shock...” This comment reeks of the view that we poor souls don’t know what is good for us and we have not understood the benefits of the bus disruptions mooted. Instead, users are more likely to hold the view that change is good only if it improves the system. He goes on to say the changes are required to make a “more integrated public transport system”.
10 The Beast August 2021
We would all love that if only it was true. Instead, we will face a very dis-integrated system with lots of added changes of travel mode and poor connections. He says that the most popular express bus services are being kept in the peak periods “...because we know people rely on them...” But why so when later on he claims that the light rail journey time from end to end is only 35 minutes. Out of peak periods other users don’t seem to count. He says that there is no deal to drive bus users onto the light rail. But how else can one interpret the necessity of Coogee users having to change to the light rail to get into the city? And we are led to believe that there is a 96 per cent customer satisfaction from light rail users. This sounds like a North Korean style survey result. It does not reflect the attitudes of many of the people who say they used the service once to try it out. “Frustratingly slow” is the usual view expressed. He comments that there shouldn’t be half empty buses running along the light rail route. Half empty or half full, that’s still more passengers than the light rail. Not so long ago we were limited to 12 on a bus and told to wait for the next one if there was more on board. Finally, there is a disconnect with the claim that there will be more frequent buses running on the new system whilst at the same time buses will be removed from the East to be deployed elsewhere. Wouldn’t more frequent services require more buses, not less? Perhaps the comment only refers to those peak services and not to those non-peak services. Yes, Andrew, the changes are scary! Simon Bartlett Coogee
CONSTANCE'S CATASTROPHE Dear Mr Constance - I read your letter with the usual amount of scepticism and of course realise there is always a fantasy element to your communications. I challenge you, Mr Minister and your staff, to use public transport for a month. Travelling to and from work, as well as all appointments during the day and night. Those empty buses that break your heart may become your lifeline to appointments, especially outside of peak hours. I doubt you’ll have the balls to take up the challenge; it doesn’t provide the usual photo opportunity, nor does it affect your constituents. Margie Coogee BUSES AND TRAMS I enjoyed reading Constance’s propaganda for the bus changes and the “success” of the trams (a 696 per cent increase on not much is still not impressive). The new bus services will be far better than the existing... really? Remember when the tram was going to be the answer to all Eastern Suburbs transport problems, and no trees were going to be removed? No overhead wires, no inconvenience to local businesses or other travellers, no cost overrun... Had anyone reviewed the lack of success of all newly introduced tram systems in Europe over the past 30 years they would have realised that there were better ways of spending the money. The truth is that most Eastern Suburbs residents use public transport extensively (the rest rely on oversized vehicles that clog the already inadequate road system). As there is little enthusiasm for building new roads in the area, surely it would be in everyone’s best interest to increase bus usage? It is interesting that the minister’s constituency is in the deep south of the state where high density population and associated transport issues are rare, to say the least. No doubt this is an interesting academic exercise that he will be able to consider from afar when he steps down. We still have to live here. Steve Coogee ANDREW CONSTANCE Dear Andrew - Thanks for your informative letter and educating us mere minions. It’s just as well there
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will be some sort of public transport available as your zero tolerance policing on NSW drivers gives us a taste of what 1939 Germany must have felt like. I hope you enjoy your chauffeur driven ministerial car, paid for by my taxes. Nathan The Bra THE MINISTER FOR TRANSPORT'S 'MESSAGE' TO THE PEOPLE A typical patronising piece of spin from one of the architects of the environmental vandalism of Sydney. Looking beyond the smokescreen of protecting us from COVID, Mr Constance represents a government that oversees the selling off and privatisation of public assets, land clearing and generally handing over NSW to vested interests to wreck the place in pursuit of maximum profit for the chosen few. This has encouraged a city to lose it’s soul, becoming a frontier where gold rush fever reigns. Bruce Clovelly SAVE THE 378 BUS CAMPAIGN I read with interest all the letters and articles relating to the proposed cuts to Eastern Suburbs buses in July’s Beast - our only remaining community letter forum. Our Save the 378 Bus group has been campaigning for two years to restore the 378 bus route, which sadly no longer exists. We now have to change from the 379 at Bondi Junction, not at the interchange, which would be sensible, but on the windswept corner of Newland and Oxford Streets, which has no bus shelter. So, no direct route to St Vincent’s Hospital, Central Railway or the CBD. We wrote many letters to Andrew Constance, the minister for transport, held protests at Bondi Junction Mall and at the Bronte Beach bus stop, interviewed many bus passengers and collected thousands of signatures. We even hired a bus to Bega to protest outside Constance’s office. He holds the Bega seat by a huge margin so basically couldn’t care less about us city folk. We cited the example of our local retired, disabled headmaster who had done so much for the community, struggling to change buses so he could get to St Vincent’s Hospital for his chemo, but there was no sympathy for the poor bloke. The only positive that has come out of our campaign is that Kristy
12 The Beast August 2021
McBain, mayor of Bega, got some publicity for supporting our cause and is now an MP in Canberra. We wish the residents of Coogee and Randwick success in their campaign to stop the ‘heartless plundering’ of Eastern Suburbs bus services. Good luck, and remember that you can always vote! Mrs Judy Ebner Bronte
the path to the existing crossing, to stop the deathwish pedestrians from putting their lives at risk and to protect motorists from having heart-stopping experiences. Common sense needs to prevail here. Two pedestrian crossings within 100 metres of one another is just ridiculous. Margie Coogee
STA BUSES Dear Editor - The government is proposing to cancel many of our favourite buses. Is this government responsible for making the whole city function, or is it just strip mining our most loved assets to hand them over to business mates? Packaging up profitable routes to prepare them for selling off to private franchises is obvious from the design of currently proposed changes. This is not transport. When privatised, the most lucrative routes remain and unprofitable routes vanish, leaving many people stranded or calling for an Uber, adding to congestion on the roads. Profit becomes more important than giving people a good, reliable bus service to keep commerce and community services swirling. Transport routes and services to and around the city of Sydney, from the days of the horse and carriage onwards, have been intimately intertwined with urban development in the eastern and southeastern suburbs. Existing bus routes cannot be rearranged without massive upheaval, confusion and loss of quality living. Channelling people onto the light rail is just a smokescreen. The real agenda is privatisation. Mora Main Waverley
COMMON SENSE, NOT ANOTHER SET OF LIGHTS, IS WHAT IS REALLY NEEDED! Hi James - Please, no more letters supporting a pedestrian crossing at Avoca Street, Randwick, when there is a perfectly good set of traffic lights 45 metres away! Seriously, how lazy are people? I walk that area a lot (far more than I drive) and know it is a risk to cross there, so I don’t. Where is the responsibility from the people crossing the road? In most cases it is an unnecessary attempt at a shortcut, and on the occasion previously described, that person sadly ‘lost’. Why would the RMS or Council put in another set of lights so that individuals can hold up an already busy road (again, when a set of lights exists a short stroll away)? People need to stop laying the blame on others for their own poor choices that in this case ended badly. And the answer to the highly emotive question, “How many people have to die?” is, “None - use the lights!” Peter Randwick
The Royal Randwick Crossing and Other Local Transport Issues PEDESTRIAN CROSSING I am a constant user of Royal Randwick and know the area of crossing John writes about (Pedestrian Crossing Desperately Needed, Letters, The Beast, July 2021). People are plain lazy because there is a pedestrian crossing a short walk from the shopping centre. Instead, they dart across the road like demented ducks. Either move the existing pedestrian crossing - the one that services the church and school - closer to the shopping centre (I am sure the church would be against this) or place railing along the rest of
ONCE AGAIN, PEDESTRIANS ARE RELEGATED I am amazed and shocked at the lack of completion of the Oxford Street Cycleway Project along Oxford Street, Bondi Junction. I fail to understand the reason for this. The project was interrupted at St James Road and works have started at Bronte Road instead, leaving the dangerous footpath outside the Waverley bus depot for completion later next year. This footpath is in desperate need of replacement. The block pavers are dangerously uneven. Earlier this year I almost hit the ground after having tripped over one paver. Consequently, I contacted Waverley Council’s customer service three times, but to no avail. The bus stop that is located in front of the bus depot is in use day
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and night and is also a thoroughfare for pedestrians and cyclists. People of all ages use this footpath and bus stop. At this point in time, I find it grossly unsatisfactory that, once again, a bicycle track has been given priority over the safety of pedestrians and public transport users. Recently I have written to the council hoping that it reconsiders giving priority to the immediate completion of the project, in the interest of public safety. A.M. Bondi Junction YORK ROAD Has anyone else experienced traffic problems in York Road? At about 8.30am and 3.30pm every school day the traffic is stopped. The disruption is unbelievable. Why did they give this school permission to expand further? What chaos will occur in coming years ? This whole area has appalling traffic movement already - and it will only get worse. Peter West Bondi Junction Environment and Development BEAST ROCK POOLS Dear James - Still on glorious ocean walks, but now from Rose Bay to Nielsen Park in the affluent shire of Woollahra. I pass by super-posh school palaces with turrets high on the hill, and the beautiful harbour below. But can these students explain better than most what the first white stuff around the edges is, when a rock pool starts to dry out? Salt? No way. Far too soluble and only found in the centre when the pool has almost completely dried out, and then as beautiful clear cubic crystals of sodium chloride. What is it then? Ask an oyster (or a coral or cuttlefish). They all need calcium carbonate, also known as aragonite and calcite, for their structure, and this is the least soluble component in seawater, almost at saturation point, followed closely by gypsum. Try evaporating some seawater in a shallow vessel in the sun; a large watch glass. Measure the pH of the seawater. The extra, humancreated carbon dioxide from our atmosphere has lowered the alkalinity of the ocean on average by 0.1 pH from pre-industrial levels. It is still as alkaline as baking soda. In fact it is bicarbonate, the ocean’s pH buffer. Yours as well, in your blood and saliva.
14 The Beast August 2021
Think about all this while sprinkling your smashed avo with very expensive but ‘natural’ pink, sustainably harvested sea salt, garnished lightly with limestone, a dob of dolomite and then getting plastered in Paris (plaster of Paris). Should you happen to read the labels on imported salt from the USA, have a look to see whether it contains prussiate (prussic acid) and hydrogen cyanide. Check this out in your library in the book called Chemistry in the Marketplace on page 118-119. If the book’s not there, change schools. Ben Bondi GOODBYE, BABY! INCINERATORS AND THE REEF Building an incinerator in Matraville shows three things. Firstly, it shows a failed, or non-existing, recycling policy. Our Liberals’ policy (state and federal) does not avoid rubbish. It just wants to burn it. Secondly, we know from worldwide studies that wherever incinerators are built, cancer rates will go up. Thirdly, burning stuff will contribute to Australia’s CO2 emissions. Australia is already among the world’s worst per person emitters (wikipedia.org). More CO2 will only accelerate the destruction of the Great Barrier Reef. UNESCO will shortly list the reef as “in danger”. Its total annihilation is on the cards. The BBC also reported that our esteemed Liberals have “committed A$3 billion” to the reef. In the same time frame, Turnbull, the Mad Monk and Scomo have committed A$100 billion to submarines. Only the mathematically challenged will believe the Liberals’ fairy-tale that spending a microscopic 3 per cent of their submarine budget on the reef will make any difference. Thomas Klikauer Sweet Coogee CIGARETTE BUTTS OUTSIDE BUNNINGS Hi James - I recently emailed Randwick Bunnings and asked if their staff or contractors could pick up or take home their cigarette butts that are left on the ground near the roller door on Clovelly Road, and I’ve heard nothing back! Where’s their pride? Where’s their ‘good neighbour’ behaviour? Don’t they understand they will be washed into the drain and straight into the ocean? How lovely for everyone!
Can everyone who smokes please put your butts in the bin or take them home? Why is this so hard? No one has ever looked at urban or natural scenery and thought, “Hmmm, this could be improved by me dropping my cigarette butt.” Have some consideration for the fish, if not the swimmers. Melissa Randwick RAMPANT INSANE OVERDEVELOPMENT 79-101 Wellington Street is the biggest development Bondi has seen for a long time. We lose 15 beautiful little houses and end up with two monstrosities with as little open surrounds as the developer can possibly get away with. Instead of maybe 50 people living on this length of road, we will have 56 units with perhaps 150-200 people crammed in. The developer walks away with money and Bondi loses more of its character and has even more people crammed in to fight over dwindling parking spots, our rarer and rarer open space, and our greater and greater traffic problems. Residents and critters have the right to live with open space around the actual buildings, but developers of course make their money by eating it up (not to mention living for a week without the ongoing insanityinducing noise of eternal building and the dust, noise and associated parking and traffic problems development brings with it). It puts a strain on our limited resources, remembering that these developments all require extra services: more electricity, internet, water and road usage, public transport and of course that rageinducing issue - parking: hence eternal road works. The NSW government is hellbent on development at all costs, with local councils’ and residents’ needs completely ignored. This development makes me sad. Nicolette Boaz Bondi MALCOLM TURNBULL JOINS OPPOSITION TO NEW WHARF Malcolm Turnbull and his fellow residents’ reasons for opposing the Royal Prince Edward Yacht Club’s new pontoon simply do not hold water. The club is not expanding or increasing its membership, their claims that the new pontoon would unduly increase the wharf’s use are totally misleading. The wharf has
limited access and it is not permitted for emergency use, while nearby Rose Bay and Double Bay wharves have excellent facilities and ample parking. Turnbull should be well aware that the need for such a large pontoon is largely due to his love for public transport. The new high speed ferries (28 knots) are now passing Felix Bay every 10 minutes, leaving a wash that has made the existing pontoon dangerous to even stand on. The extra length is largely there to provide stability. The original proposal, which was permitted in the original wharf’s approval, was approved by the RMS and Woollahra Council staff. However, it appears that undue influence at Woollahra has held sway over its final approval, forcing the club to fight for its rights all the way to the Land and Environment Court. Regrettably, this is not a new situation. Even though most of these opponents are members they seem to be more interested in ridding themselves of this commercial blot in their bay, at any opportunity. This included opposing the yacht club’s recent much-needed renovations (its first in 100 years), where they successfully employed a Senior Council who succeeded in getting Council to put impossible limitations on the club’s use. Also, a group that included another prominent resident, [name redacted for legal reasons], strangely got Council to eliminate almost half the parking in Wolseley Road only six months after Council staff had rejected a similar application. It is a yacht club, not an RSL or a leagues club, with most of its members living in the area. Its impact on the neighbourhood is close to nil. What makes this situation so ridiculous is that most of these residents (except for Malcolm, who has his own private wharf) will be significant beneficiaries of the new wharf, and I doubt that in six months’ time they will notice any detrimental change in their exclusive amenity. In any other area it would simply be a storm in bucket. I am the one that will be the biggest loser of all. My yacht A-BUS is currently moored right off the end of the current wharf and right where the new pontoon will now be installed. Despite this, I believe the new pontoon is urgently needed. Kindest regards, Andrew Goldfinch Bondi Junction
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WASTE NOT, WANT NOT So, it has recently come to my attention that Randwick Council has a Food Organics and Garden Organics collection service (FOGO). Good going, Randwick! I have hoped for such a service to be available everywhere for many years now. That my neighbouring council has such a forward-thinking initiative is impressive. However, I live in the Waverley local government area and it does not. Not so cool. In our duplex we have a compost bin and a worm farm (supplied, I should add, by Waverley Council) and a patch of garden that reaps all the benefits from them, so all our composting needs are pretty well met. As such, it’s not for me personally that I’m asking, but for all those in situations with no gardens, or apartments with no connection or access to the garden, because this is such a wonderful way to manage waste and contribute in a positive way to helping our environment. With the increasing number of flats in medium density apartment housing (the continuing saga of over-development) in Waverley, I think it behoves Council to consider introducing this compost/organics/food waste collection service as soon as possible. Frankly, it’s the least that should be done in light of this insatiable overdevelopment. And all you folks who have environmental sympathies but who still throw away all your organic food waste, well, this just won’t do, will it? Waverley, we need to do our bit! Tina Harris Bondi GIANTS EAT SMALL THINGS FOR BREAKFAST Giants eat small things for breakfast. They wake in the glowing sunrise from their contented slumber, stretching and stomping along the glistening Eastern coastline in search of all that is smaller than them. Their enormous footprints trample every rock, branch and flower in their path. Their tongues snack on butterflies as they fly past. Their fists smash little homes into tiny pieces before sinking their jaws into generations of family history. Hungrier still, they scoop up birds, trees and even whole parks and chew them up until they’re dust. Because Giants eat small things for breakfast. As morning lingers and the sun shines stronger, the sound of
crashing waves pricks the Giants’ ears. With a flare of their enormous nostrils they follow the salty smell down to a beach called Bondi. Their eyes widen. Never before have they seen such a stretch of crystal water washing up white cloud-like bubbles upon such soft golden sand. They wonder if this is heaven? But as sweat drips down their flushed cheeks, they realise it’s an earthly paradise. Rubbing their sweaty palms together, they trudge to the water’s edge to bathe. Beautiful fish frolic at their unsightly ankles. The Giants dip their faces into the water and swallow the colourful fish whole. Because Giants eat small, beautiful things for breakfast and lunch. Refreshed from the glory of the pristine water, The Giants travel west towards a place called Waverley. They see an open space with small people gathering - some of them are laughing, some dancing and some old small people wearing white are rolling black balls along the lawn. The Giants look at each other with a knowing grin. Moments later, they start to rip the place apart from its core. The groups of small people rush out in fear. Except for one - she has grey hair. As pieces of earth sling across her white clothing, she stands perfectly still, staring into a lifetime of memories that still live in this soil. The Giants continue their frenzy - digging, smashing, pausing only to lick every inch of dirt off their fat fingers. As the sun goes down, their bellies are full from gorging on these ancient Eastern lands. But they’ll start all over again tomorrow. Because Giants eat small, beautiful, old things for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Katey Knight kateyknightcreative.com Other Local Happenings REGARDING THE ‘UPSKIRTED’ Hi James - This is regarding the woman shopping at Eastgardens who was violated by the pathetic little pervert filming her buttocks and whatever else he was hoping to see. Why don’t women pick up the nearest jar of pickles or something equally hard and bash the violator over the head with it? Why do women passively and simply just report it to the police? How many more women will be violated by him before he’s caught (if he’s caught)?
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August 2021 The Beast 17
Upskirting is an assault on a woman and she has every right to fight back. It’s because we don’t react when we catch the man doing it, that they continue to do it. If every woman bashed their violating upskirter in the head with whatever’s nearest, they actually might stop doing it! If he’s upskirting you on an escalator for example, simply turn round and shove your foot in his chest/stomach/thigh and send him tumbling all the way to the bottom. This would be very easy to do in a public place and would most likely gain the support of onlookers/ witnesses and the cowardly violator would run as fast as he could. Stop putting up with these filthy, pathetic men. Stand up for yourself as women because no one else will. Leanne Randwick NO MORE SHARED VILLAGE I was fascinated to read the statistics in James Hutton’s editorial in the June edition of The Beast. There was an overwhelmingly positive response to the January survey on the Coogee Shared Village Project, with a huge majority of respondents wanting the project extended permanently and a small number wanting it extended for three or six months. Businesses and individuals alike were strong supporters of extending the project. The large number of responses (over 3,000), even when expressed as a fraction of the households in Coogee that were invited to respond (7,800), means that the margin of error is very small. The fact that 95 per cent of respondents identified as locals and 66 per cent were from Coogee shows that the response was strongly representative of the views of local residents and ratepayers in Coogee and the Randwick LGA. Presumably on the strength of this response, Council staff recommended an extension to the project. And yet our elected representatives voted to end the project. That doesn’t sound very representative of the clearly expressed views of the locals and ratepayers. I wonder how well our elected representatives sleep at night, knowing how poorly they do the job that we elected them for and pay them for - representing us. Best regards, James Lawrence Long term resident and ratepayer in Coogee
18 The Beast August 2021
WHY IS TASTE OF COOGEE NOT IN COOGEE? It’s a question I get every day. The decision to move the event was made for us. The event was established in 2013 and, in my opinion, Coogee’s best event for the whole community. Each year the event gets opposition from Council, and in January 2020 (pre-pandemic) it was no different, with the general manager at Randwick Council stating, “Taste of Coogee will not happen in 2020.” Why is that? In 2019, Taste of Coogee paid Randwick City Council $33,000 in fees. It is not paid for by ratepayers and has never had any antisocial behaviour - quite the opposite, a great family day out over the Father’s Day weekend. During its seven year history, Taste of Coogee has donated over $100,000 to local charities and indirectly contributed millions of dollars in revenue to the local economy. If you have ever attended a major outdoor food and wine event you can imagine what a whopping undertaking it is. Taste of Coogee was originally held in Goldstein Reserve but was so popular that it grew too big and became a safety concern. After much negotiation with Council and the Randy Petes Cricket Club it was moved to Coogee Oval, which became the home of Taste of Coogee for the following four years. Coogee Oval is a nice big, safe, fenced venue, and it’s owned by ratepayers - perfect for one weekend a year between the rugby and cricket seasons. However, in April 2020 (without any notification) Randwick City Council voted on a motion to refuse the use of the oval. The reasons given included that it ‘might’ pose safety concerns for cricketers in the season ahead. These safety concerns were not elaborated on. The cricket pitch is fenced off for the event. In 2019, the only need for repair was to the Dolphin Street driveway, which was already compromised from the football season. It cost just $800. The invitational Argentina vs Randwick rugby match the following weekend (after Taste of Coogee in 2019) went ahead without a hitch and so did the cricket season. The event was subsequently offered to relocate to Trenerry Reserve, which is the dog park past Wylies Baths, up on the cliffs south of the beach. This spot is too small,
has no parking, no public transport and is an unsafe location. Council has never used Trenerry Reserve for a major event for all those reasons. Taste of Coogee is run by locals, for locals, and any profits from the event went to support Coogee Family Fun Day, which was a free community event. Family Fun Day had been held in Coogee on the first Saturday in December for 25 years, until Council held a similar event in the same location just three weeks before Family Fun Day was scheduled to be held in 2019 and discounted their fees. These events are booked with Council months in advance, but apparently they didn’t even know it was on! After much consideration, and knowing what we are up against, it was easier to find a new location. EQ at Moore Park offers great parking, transport, light rail and buses. Coogee businesses are coming to the event, and it still is promoting the area. Thankyou to the councillors who have always supported Taste of Coogee and see merit in community events; Brendan Roberts, Christie Hamilton and Harry Stavrinos. Bernadette Summers Founder, Taste of Coogee BEACHSIDE HAIKUS You can idle here But please don’t idle your car Look at scenes, not screens Sounds of surf, wind, gulls Turn the bluetooth speaker off Hear the beach music Your dog does poo poos Not very nice on our shoe shoes Please take it away Not your plastic shards Put them in the bin anyway Help the sea creatures Smoke on the water? Sorry not on the beaches Breathe the freshest air Franz Maroubra JUNE'S DOOM AND GLOOM I know you can’t hear me, God, but I’m speaking to you anyway. What on earth is happening down here?! COVID-19 is putting us back into hell! What has happened to Heaven on Earth? Surely this COVID-19 global population decrease is not part of the Divine Plan? And if not, how could it happen? And why is it continuing? Many of us are feeling so alone down here; so abandoned, so forgotten. Our trust in you and
the Angels is wavering (especially those in Waverley and Bondi Junction - the beginning of the latest COVID-19 outbreak). Lisa Waverley WELL DONE, RANDWICK RITZ I just wanted to reply to Kevin from Coogee about his gripe with Randwick Ritz and their refusal to accept cash (Randwick Ritz, Letters, The Beast, July 2021). I say good on the Ritz for sticking to their guns, as is their right. It has been proven that the COVID-19 virus can survive on cash for as long as five weeks, so it’s actually in everyone’s best interest to avoid this method of payment as much as they can. I fail to see how the Ritz is “lazy and bullying” simply by taking these measures. I think Kevin needs to check his privilege and think about what is best for the community, not just what is convenient for him. Emma Bondi LOCAL MP DENYING MY RIGHTS In December 2020, I approached Gabrielle Upton, the local MP for Vaucluse, to raise my concerns relating to my own workplace injury claim - essentially no progress after three years. Last year, our union representative encouraged us to request a meeting with our local MPs to discuss our issues. Marjorie O’Neill (Coogee MP) kindly attended one of our meetings and gave us tips on how to effectively approach MPs. After all, I knew it was my right as a citizen to ‘have my say’ in the government and law by ‘raising matters of concern with my local representative’. So I wrote Gabrielle a heartfelt email outlining my experience and to raise awareness of its wider impact on Australian society. I asked for help and I requested a meeting to discuss this and provide my evidence. But, instead of agreeing to a meeting, she asked for my permission to forward my email to the minister for icare (Insurance & Care NSW), Dominic Perrottet. This move concerned me, as he was the minister appearing all over the news for the recent icare scandals, and for whom I had signed (and sent her) a petition asking for his resignation. After Gabrielle’s involvement, I received a response letter from the group executive of icare, Rob Craig, who then resigned a week
20 The Beast August 2021
later after a parliamentary inquiry, leaving with a ‘golden parachute’ of $430,000. Rob sent exactly the same response that I received before, neglecting any wrongdoing and failing to address the real issues. Again being ignored and gaslighted, but now beyond government agencies and at a ministerial level. After a bit of back and forth with the new group executive at icare it became clear that I’d proved my point - even louder and stronger - and was still receiving the same neglect. So I decided to approach Gabrielle again, but this time she said she could not assist me any further. She said she had done all she could do. So my questions are: • Did she ever care to really listen to me as one of her constituents? Nope. • Did she ever accept my meeting request after my heartfelt letter as someone who is trying to contribute to the good of society? Nope. • Did she deny my citizenship rights? Yes, absolutely. On the claim itself, since the beginning, I had to constantly defend my basic rights to pay and treatment. Later, I escalated mismanagement complaints, including revealing dirty practices used by icare. Fortunately my lawyer and specialists were able join me at times in these fights, yet still nothing was resolved. Then, further escalation of complaints to each appropriate government agency until I had reached the entire WorkCover portfolio. Each step of this process only revealed more deception, neglect and injustice, all while being passed around the various bodies and agencies, as none had jurisdiction to resolve anything. My specialists were aware of the toll this experience was having on my mental health. I was diagnosed with different mental health disorders that I didn’t have before I entered this system. Deep inside I knew that what affected me the most was being unfairly treated and having my rights constantly denied. I joined a Facebook group called ‘Union NSW - Injured Workers Campaign Network’ and I met other people who were experiencing the same. I found out that my story was the story of many others and, like them, I soon realised that the entire system is rotten to the core. To my great disappointment, Gabrielle is an example of a politi-
cian who, rather than listening to the concerns of her community, prefers to get along with those responsible for this WorkCover mess. This is notably a different side from what I remember when receiving a beautiful letter from her to congratulate me on becoming a citizen and a member of her community. Shame on Gabrielle for not taking any interest in the bigger issues of Australia like this rotten WorkCover system that destroys families, drives people to self-harm and damages the mental health of those who, like me, have the bad luck of experiencing it. To Gabrielle, just keep doing what you do best. Go blow your own trumpet with your latest renovations like Vaucluse House, with your prizes to school kids, with your COVID newsletters copied from the government website. And don’t forget to keep forwarding your emails. You fail me as a citizen. And you fail as an MP to listen to the community you welcomed me into. I will, no doubt, continue to exercise my other citizen rights. Firstly, I will not vote for you at the next election and, secondly, I will use my freedom of speech to say that your ‘trumpet’ is totally out of tune with ‘Advance Australia Fair’. As citizens, we must be treated fairly in all dealings with government, with the respect, dignity, care and sensitivity Australians deserve. Gisele Bondi DINNER FOR TWO Dear James - I’m shocked! Shocked, yet strangely excited. Not to be deterred by the controversy generated by that arse painting a few months ago, you’ve taken it up a notch and put a couple 69ering on the cover! Love your work. Hamish Randy Wick CROSSWORD Dear Susan Geason (The Crossword Again, Letters, The Beast, July 2021) - Although one is a novelist of published books, one only has to look up on the World Wide Web “obsoleteness” and, lo and behold, there are many references to obsoleteness being a synonym for obsolescence, datedness, antiquation (see www.merriam-webster.com/ thesaurus/obsoleteness). Leave the crossword designer alone please! Lisa Bronte ¢
Epic Aussie TV.
THUMBS UP STATELESS Loosely inspired by the reallife story of Cornelia Rau (an Aussie who ended up in immigration detention), this epic Australian television drama series is well worth a watch. You can catch it on Netflix. NEW TRICKS With all the spare time during lockdown, it’s never been easier to learn new skills, especially with all the free iPhone apps and YouTube tutorials on just about every subject you can possibly imagine. COLONOSCOPY An accessible and affordable way to detect serious bowel problems before it’s too late, and shed a few kilos in the process. BULK BOOZE Support our local Australian wine producers by buying in bulk direct from the source. The Beast’s favourites are Nick Spencer Wines (nickspencerwines.com.au) and Lillypilly Estate (lillypillywines.com.au). TAKING RESPONSIBILITY Hats off to the local cafés and restaurants making an effort to use sustainable packaging and reduce plastic waste, like La Sen Vietnamese in The Spot.
THUMBS DOWN ROGUE FELINES I’m sure we’ve mentioned this before, but roaming cats without bells and collars should be rounded up and put on Wedding Cake Island. MASK LITTER The number of carelessly discarded face masks has officially overtaken the number of dog shit bags left littering our streets and parks, and that’s no easy feat. August 2021 The Beast 21
Dog attacks are up 43 per cent across the Eastern Suburbs.
Spike in Vicious Dog Attacks Spreads Fear Throughout the East Words Charles Stuart Photo Tadeusz Lakota Local dog owners are concerned for the safety of their pets after a spike in vicious dog attacks across the Eastern Suburbs. Recent posts on both the Bondi and Coogee Local Loop Facebook groups have drawn hundreds of comments, not only offering sympathy to the victims but also sharing their own stories, suggesting a spike in canine aggression. One dog owner, who asked not to be named, said a recent attack on their dog had changed their pet and their perspective on walks long-term. “He’s just not the same,” the dog owner told The Beast. “We don’t take him to the park anymore, he’s just on the lead now. It’s not good for any of us. He’s much less social and not as happy as he used to be, and it’s been very stressful for us to be around other dogs too.” Many of the attacks are reported to our local councils, and a fine or a muzzle order can be issued as a first response. Incidents can be escalated if further infringements occur. Attacks have been reported at Marks 22 The Beast August 2021
Park in Tamarama, Rose Bay Beach, Coogee Oval and Bardon Park in Coogee. A number of dog owners we spoke with said that they had been intimidated by the owners of aggressive animals and were terrified of reprisals for reporting the attacks. “Waverley Council has been really good, they’ve done everything they can do to help,” the dog owner said. “I had hundreds of people reach out to me who I either hadn’t spoken to in years or who didn’t even know me. It’s been a really big community response.” While the NSW Office of Local Government only recorded a 7.5 per cent increase in total dog attacks across the state from January to March this year (compared with last year), ‘dog on dog’ attacks were up 24.7 per cent. Interestingly, ‘dog on cat’ attacks decreased by 7 per cent across the state in the same period. More locally, however, total dog attacks in Waverley increased by a whopping 200 per cent, with Randwick experiencing a 73 per cent increase. Dog
attacks in Woollahra actually decreased by 20 per cent. It should be noted that these percentages are exaggerated by the low number of reported attacks. In Waverley, for example, only six attacks were reported from January to March this year, up from just two last year. Many attacks also go unreported. Antony Kery, a principal veterinarian at Struggletown Vet in Randwick, told The Beast that socialisation was a key aspect in preventing aggression. “Early socialisation - and lots of it - with a good trainer is key,” Mr Kery explained. “Puppy schools are super important, even if you’ve had lots of dogs in the past. You want to find a good accredited trainer such as a Delta trainer that’s using fear-free training,” he advised. There has been some speculation among residents that COVID-19 restrictions have led to a decrease in socialisation between dogs, which could explain the rise in attacks. Mr Kery suggested that all dog owners can contribute to the safety of their pets and others, regardless of whether or not their dog exhibits aggressive behaviour. “Never take your dog to an off-lead park until you’ve got very good recall training with your dog, which means they will come to you when you call,” Mr Kery told The Beast. “There’s always going to be someone who lets their aggressive dog off the leash, and there’s nothing we can do about that. Have a look around, and if you notice a big group of people standing around chatting and not interacting with their dogs, maybe don’t go in there, because they’re not looking out for their dogs,” he added. Mr Kery also advised that aggression in older dogs may require intervention from an animal behaviourist.
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It's been a while.
A Light at the End of the Stairs Words Nicola Smith Residents across Randwick City are at a loss as to why important pieces of construction and restoration work are being left unfinished in the local area. One such site requiring restoration is the stairs between Albi Place and Judge Street in Randwick, which have reportedly been closed for nine years. The stairs were cordoned off after a wall at 18 Judge Street was at risk of collapse. Since then there has been an ongoing dispute between Randwick Council and the property owner regarding who should pay for the remediation. Randwick resident Stef Flegman has been a part of the campaign to see the works completed and says he feels disappointed by the lack of response from Randwick Council. “It’s just a complete shock to everyone here that it’s taken this long,” Mr Flegman said. “It’s a complete failure of local government, to me and to all the residents here.” Despite a unanimous resolution at a Randwick Council meeting in February to advise a timeline of the works, the stairs remain inaccessible. 24 The Beast August 2021
A second site that requires upgrading is the children’s play area at Bundock Park, Clovelly Beach, where storms caused significant erosion to the grassed area behind the park earlier this year. A concerned Clovelly resident, who asked not to be named, told The Beast that the area was in desperate need of repairs but Randwick Council has yet to act. “The council has been well and truly aware of it,” the resident explained to The Beast. “They put up barriers the day after the storm came through, but they haven’t done a single thing since then and another storm has come through and made it worse.” The areas of erosion have been marked with barriers by Randwick Council, but the Clovelly resident says that leaving it this way makes the area even more dangerous. “We need a repair job on this decimated park. It is highly dangerous with kids riding around on bikes and playing, who very soon will go straight through a barrier. It’s so ludicrous that something as clearly dangerous as this would be left for so long,” the resident said. The resident also told The Beast that they knew of at least three other local families who had written to Randwick Council but were yet to receive a response. The Beast reached out to Randwick Council for comment on both issues. A Council spokesperson explained that the dispute over responsibilty for repairing the stairs had caused significant delays and that the work would be completed shortly. “Council has been liaising with the property owner since 2013 seeking to have them repair their wall. This included liaising with the owner’s legal
representative, commissioning structural reports, land surveys, stormwater and masonry investigations and issuing an order on the owner,” the spokesperson said. “Ultimately the owner accepted responsibility for the wall and works to repair it are now largely complete.” “Council is now repairing the stairs and upgrading the nearby Judge Street Reserve by clearing the weeds, managing erosion and planting native trees and shrubs.” As for the playground upgrade works at Clovelly, Council explained that residents wouldn’t have to wait much longer. “The playground at Bundock Park in Clovelly will receive an upgrade this year. We consulted with the community late last year on designs for the playground and construction will start next month in August,” the spokesperson told The Beast. “The eroded section of Bundock Park will be repaired as part of the playground works so as to reduce any impact on residents.” Mr Flegman feels that the incomplete remediation works are well within the council’s responsibility. “We’re not asking for anything extra or anything special, just for our local area to be maintained and looked after the same as everywhere else,” he said. “Randwick Council, when they put their mind to it, they do a great job, and that’s just what we’re asking for here.”
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August 2021 The Beast 25
Science in action.
MUGgLEs Making Magic for Cerebral Palsy Research Words Nicola Smith Photo Jessica Meades The MUGgLE study at the NeuRA Imaging Facility in Randwick wants local kids aged 5-15 to assist with research on the effects of cerebral palsy on muscle development. Dr Bart Bolsterlee, one of the lead MUGgLE researchers, said the research is some of the first of its kind. “This is the first study looking at muscle growth in this depth and collecting data on muscle growth in children. We’re hoping to quantify differences in growth in children with and without cerebral palsy,” Dr Bolsterlee told The Beast. The study is a collaboration between Cerebral Palsy Alliance Research Institute, University of New South Wales and Neuroscience Research Australia (NeuRA) and is run by Professor Rob Herbert and Professor Caroline Rae, along with Dr Bolsterlee. It aims to build fundamental knowledge of different children’s muscle development to compare with children who have cerebral palsy. Dr Bolsterlee told The Beast that to do that, they needed 26 The Beast August 2021
families from the local community to get involved. “In the study we are hoping to scan 320 kids, 200 of those will be typically developing. We’re halfway through but we really need more children to be involved,” Dr Bolsterlee explained. One in three children with cerebral palsy can’t walk and it is the leading cause of childhood disability in the West. Researchers measure children’s height and weight, as well as making some observations on ankle stiffness (a common problem for children with cerebral palsy). They then conduct an MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) scan in a special MRI scanner, which is operated by NeuRA and is part of the National Imaging Facility. Dr Bolsterlee said that the process is similar to what you would undergo if you had torn a muscle or ligament in your leg and needed imaging. “There’s no harmful radiation, just a strong magnetic field. The kids can even watch a movie while they do it. I tell them all they have to do is do
nothing, and stay completely still,” Dr Bolsterlee said. The study also includes infants aged 0-3 months who are scanned using a ‘feed-andwrap’ technique where a baby is induced into natural sleep after a feed and then wrapped to hold the legs still during the scan, meaning no sedation is involved. The MRI technology being used is the key to the research as it allows researchers to view the muscle in high detail through Diffusion Tensor Imaging. “This imaging lets us look at the muscle fibres, which are about as thick as a piece of hair, and see their structure,” Dr Bolsterlee told The Beast. Justine Currell, a mum from North Bondi, said she was more than happy to sign her three children up for the study. “They weren’t scared at all, they were so excited, and they’re getting to see science in action,” Ms Currell said. Ms Currell’s children, Barnaby, Mouse and Charlie, will have their leg muscles scanned three times, 1.5 years apart. Dr Bolsterlee said he feels that being involved in the project is beneficial for children. “Most of our referrals are by word of mouth, because children have such a great time they tell all their friends,” Dr Bolsterlee said. Ms Currell agrees, saying she would encourage other parents to get involved. “Definitely get involved. It’s harmless and it’s a chance to be involved in something meaningful. It’s been a great reminder, especially in this area of great privilege, that there are other kids that do struggle, and we can do things to help them,” Ms Currell said. To find out more about the MUGgLE study please visit muggle.neura.edu.au.
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August 2021 The Beast 27
Team Bondi back in 1937.
Bondi Tells Its Own Story Words Nicola Smith Photo State Library of New South Wales A new local history space, The Bondi Story Room, will open in the newly renovated Bondi Pavilion, providing locals and visitors alike with an immersive, digital, history experience. Waverley Mayor Paula Masselos said the project aims to reveal untold tales of Bondi’s history. “We have been digging through our own archives and working with historical and other institutions across the country to uncover the many lesser-known tales of our extraordinary residents,” Mayor Masselos told The Beast. The Bondi Story Room will feature a digital mural where visitors can interact with Bondi stories dating from pre-colonisation to the present. Participants will be able to tap on the figure they would like to learn more about on the digital display and hear personal stories of Bondi’s history. Todd Fuller, Waverley Council’s gallery and curatorial assistant, said that both the concept and the content of the history room were driven by community engagement. 28 The Beast August 2021
“There have long been passionate members of our community who care about Bondi Pavilion and local history. These are people who have grown up in Bondi and had major events of their lives unfold on the sand. They wanted a space that holds all the stories of the rich characters of Bondi,” Mr Fuller told The Beast. The project has gone through many rounds of community consultation and stakeholder committees, and it is set to launch with the reopening of the pavilion in early 2022. Over 700 local stories have been nominated to date and they will continuously refresh and cycle through in the Story Room, so everyone’s story is told and no two visits are the same. In recognising that history is always being made, the story room is designed to be an ongoing living library with an online portal through which people can submit their stories which will then be reviewed and uploaded by the curatorial staff. The room is being developed in collaboration with digital artists Grumpy Sailor and will
include soundscape, video game and museum technology. Tanya Goldberg, executive manager of communications, culture and events at Waverley Council, said that the purpose of this array of technology is to create a powerful interaction with history. “We are hoping to create a rich atmospheric experience, something that you really feel with all of your senses, rather than some sort of museum exhibition, it will be something immersive,” Ms Goldberg told The Beast. The stories included in the project include those of Indigenous culture, migration, surfing history and more, with the team still searching for stories to add to the room. Mr Fuller said that they are on the lookout for relevant, diverse stories from Bondi. “Sometimes what’s significant is very personal, so it doesn’t have to be significant to the public record, just to the person submitting it,” Mr Fuller said. One story included in the project is that of Ms Lea Hill who passed away in April 2021 and was featured in the June edition of The Beast. Ms Hill’s pioneering spirit in encouraging both women and older competitors in winter swimming clubs and surf lifesaving events is a prime example of local stories The Bondi Story Room will feature. “We are still very much welcoming new contributions from the community. If your grandma was a Miss Bondi that we should know about, we want you to get in touch through the Have Your Say portal,” Mr Fuller told The Beast. You can contribute a story to the Bondi Story Room at haveyoursay.waverley.nsw.gov.au or by emailing BondiStoryRoom @waverley.nsw.gov.au.
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Sticking to their roots.
The World’s Best Gin Comes From Waverley Words Nicola Smith Photo John Humphreys The husband-wife duo that runs Bellagio Café in Waverley and Bondi Junction has won ‘Best Gin in the World’ with their new spirit, Ester. Felix Clark, the co-creator of Ester, said that his interest in gin started very close to home. “My interest in distilling started about six years ago during a competition with a mate to create some bathtub vodka and gin,” Mr Clark told The Beast. He refined his gin recipe through feedback from his wife. “I was providing my wife, who is my palate, my nose and everything, with different samples of gin and vodka for 2-3 years and she would tell me, ‘This is good, this isn’t good’,” he explained. Mr Clark says this partnership has been key to their success so far. “It sounds crazy, but my wife and I, we do everything together. We own the cafés together, we do Ester together, our whole relationship thrives on creativity and working together,” Mr Clark told The Beast. 30 The Beast August 2021
Mr Clark and his wife, Corinna, have successfully run Bellagio Café in Waverley for seventeen years and their second café, Bellagio Tuckshop in Bondi Junction, for seven years. Bellagio has become the HQ of Ester Gin. “We feel this traditional pull to the east, particularly Bronte and Waverley. It’s where we met and lived and it’s always felt like home.” After a plan to purchase a brewing space in Sydney fell through, the couple decided to shelve the idea for a few years before trying again, this time using a contract distiller in Melbourne. “I went in with a very clear idea of what I wanted the gin to be and what I wanted the recipe to be, so in our situation it was very much Ester’s intellectual property and Ester’s recipe,” Mr Clark told The Beast. Things only went up from there. “We went to market in June last year and we keep getting crazy awards and great feedback, as well as a lot of traction in the industry,” Mr Clark said. The couple began sending their gin to competitions such as the Australian Gin Awards because they wanted industry feedback. “We knew the gin was good but we wanted it to be ratified by the industry, so to have the awards come back was very surprising, sort of like that proud dad moment when you realise you’ve made something special,” Mr Clark said. Ester Gin won ‘Best in Show’ at the Australian Gin Awards and then topped the global markets by getting the gold medal in The World Gin Awards in February. However, winning such a prestigious prize hasn’t taken the curated attention to detail out of the brand. “We’re still very much sitting in the indie market and a bit on the side of obscurity, but the biggest change has been the way that it opens doors - it’s allowed us to get a tasting for a restaurant or a liquor chain and things like that,” Mr Clark said. Looking forward, the couple is now planning to set up a distillery closer to home, in Sydney’s Inner West, which Mr Clark describes as “the mecca of drinking in Australia”. The future looks bright for the makers of the world’s best gin, with Mr Clark hoping they can continue as they’ve begun. “We’re focused on capitalising on what we’ve achieved in our first eight months of operation. Staying true to our roots and not selling out, and making sure our products reflect our values and the values of those around us,” he told The Beast. You can buy Ester at Bellagio Café, Native Drop Bondi, Georges Cellars, the Robin Hood Hotel, Bellevue Hill Cellars and P&V in Paddington.
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August 2021 The Beast 31
The Children’s Book Council’s Elizabeth Cummings and Liz Bowring.
Exciting Worlds to Explore in a New Anthology for Kids Words Nicola Smith Photo Michael Cummings The Eastern Suburbs Subbranch of the Children’s Book Council of Australia has launched an anthology of NSW children’s authors in support of the Book Council’s work in schools across the state. The theme of the anthology, ‘Old Worlds, New Worlds and Other Worlds’, is taken from the 2021 CBCA Book Week theme and is reflective of the changing worlds children are currently grappling with in the coronavirus pandemic. Through the theme and the anthology, children can explore not just what was, and what the world will be, after coronavirus, but other worlds that they can escape to through literature in strange and uncertain times. All proceeds from the anthology go towards CBCA’s work in promoting a love of Australian books in children. The anthology was put together in just under six months and began as the brainchild of Eastern Suburbs CBCA Sub32 The Beast August 2021
branch members Elizabeth Cummings and Amanda Lieber. They began with a call out to Eastern Suburbs Sub-branch authors, but the project quickly grew to include work from across NSW. Eastern Suburbs Sub-branch president and contributing author Elizabeth Cummings said her work was inspired by her time living in Coogee. “My own story is of a stingray in the ocean and clearly that comes from my experiences of living here, and it’s connected to that CBCA theme of ‘Old Worlds, New Worlds and Other Worlds’. The contributions are so varied because of the diversity of writers who are right here in Sydney and in NSW,” Ms Cummings told The Beast. The diversity of the work is also reflected in new and emerging children’s authors being published alongside established authors such as Kate Forsyth and Australian Children’s Laureate Ursula Dubosarsky.
The anthology has something for every child, from short stories to comics, ghost stories, poems and plays and is designed for individual and classroom use, particularly in the lead up to Book Week from August 21-27. Among the many worlds explored are ‘old worlds’, such as World War II Budapest in Heroes of the Secret Underground by Susanne Gervay. ‘New worlds’ are found in The World is Waiting by Alison Evernden, a poem about the process of emerging from changes across the globe, and ‘other worlds’ explored a nonfiction piece, Encounter with a Lion by Jan Latta, and Ted is Off to Hospital, a poem about visiting the hospital for the first time, by Sarah Cummings. The anthology also includes acknowledgement of Country and a poem by Indigenous author Jasmine Seymour, illustrated by Dub Leffler, in English and Darug, the language of Indigenous people of the Sydney region. “It was so important for an inaugural anthology to be truly Australian from the start and acknowledge that this is the world of the first people of Australia, Ms Cummings told The Beast. Looking forward, Ms Cummings is hopeful that the anthology will become an annual publication that raises funds for CBCA’s work promoting Australian literature in children across NSW and Australia. “It was a bit of work and I loved it. If they asked me to do it again next year, I’d say, absolutely! But I do think it would benefit if each state had a turn developing it - I’m all for collaboration,” Ms Cummings told The Beast. You can purchase a copy of Old Worlds, New Worlds, Other Worlds through the CBCA NSW website at www.cbcansw. org.au/merchandise.
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HELPING TEENS WITH SOCIAL INTERACTION Good Conduct Program Includes: • Social Media and Phone Etiquette • School Formals and Dances • Parties • Dining • Interviews • Grooming • Image Consulting • Introductions and Conversations ESSENTIAL ETIQUETTE kathryn@essentialetiquette.com.au 0419 433 347 August 2021 The Beast 33
What are you working on at the moment? I am painting some seascapes of Bondi Beach under a full moon. Do you have any exhibitions coming up? My upcoming show, In Awe, will run from August 5-11 at The Shop Gallery, 112 Glebe Point Road, Glebe. It will be open from 10am-6pm daily, with the opening event on Friday 6 from 6-8pm. Please come!
Following her heart.
Local Artist: Iris Toren from Bondi Junction Interview James Hutton Photo Minzoet Photography Introducing the local artist behind this month’s cover illustration of ibises at Bronte Beach, Bondi Junction’s Iris Toren... How long have you lived here? I have lived in the Bondi area since the age of one. I love the ocean and would find it difficult to live away from the water. What's your favourite beach? I particularly love Bronte Beach (the ibises on the cover are beautiful residents of Bronte). What's your favourite eatery? I love eating! I am vegan and love Eden and Chachas at Bondi Beach, Laurie’s and Peppe’s in Bondi, Hippocrates in Randwick, Bodhi and Mother Chu’s in the CBD and Golden Lotus, Gigi and Blossoming Lotus in Newtown. Best thing about the Eastern Suburbs? All the beautiful beaches. I also love Centennial Park. Its bird life provides a lot of artistic inspiration for me. How would you describe your art? My artwork is inspired by nature and beauty. My first love
34 The Beast August 2021
is drawing. I love to draw and paint portraits, particularly of children and animals. I also do a lot of flower, bird and landscape painting these days in watercolours, oils and acrylics. Where can people see your work? By visiting my website, iristorenart.com (please email me if you’d like to commission a portrait). Who are your artistic inspirations? I love Arthur Streeton and the Australian impressionists, Norman Lindsay, Vermeer, Klimt, Whistler and Degas. What are your artistic ambitions? To keep on growing, evolving and living up to my potential. I want to bring some joy to others through my artwork. It gives me a buzz to think that it will be passed down through generations. I also donate half my profits to animal welfare charities, predominantly Animals Australia, Animals Asia, WIRES, Edgar’s Mission, Animal Welfare League, Greyhound Rescue and the Cat Protection Society.
When did you discover you had a gift for your craft? As a child. It was nurtured by my parents. A love of art runs in my family. In fact, my grandmother was a gifted artist and well-known fashion designer in Germany in the 1950s and 1960s. Did you study art? I studied art at the historic Julian Ashton Art school down at The Rocks, taught by Richard Ashton, Phillip Ashton and Nigel Thomson. Any words of wisdom for young aspiring artists? If it’s your passion, your dharma, you must pursue it. Who is your favourite person? My beautiful, kind, wise and funny daughter, Laura. What do you do for work? I worked in IT until 7 years ago, when I decided to follow my heart and focus on art. I also did my yoga teacher training. It’s a blessing to be able to share yoga with others. What's your favourite thing about work? I spend my time deeply admiring nature and doing my best to honour it by lovingly creating a representation of it. Do you have a favourite quote? “May all beings be happy and free, and may our thoughts, words and actions contribute to this happiness and freedom for all.” - Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu. Any other words of wisdom for our readers? Be kind to all, including animals and yourself.
August 2021 Tide Chart Numbers Bureau of Meteorology Tidal Centre Photo Theresia Hall Instagram @theresia.g.hall Monday
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Tuesday
30 0106 1.17 0703 0.65 1346 1.42 2030 0.70
31 0213 0800 1448 2148
1.10 0.70 1.42 0.68
2 0255 0858 1542 2227
1.18 0.65 1.47 0.72
3 0406 0953 1637 2330
1.16 0.66 1.52 0.65
9 0253 0849 1425 2053
0.32 1.37 0.46 1.86
10 0330 0929 1509 2133
16 0145 0750 1430 2110
1.34 0.51 1.59 0.56
23 0254 0852 1435 2100
0.22 1.45 0.39 1.85
•
Fisherman Nick.
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday
Sunday
Moons
1 0150 0807 1446 2114
1.26 0.62 1.43 0.76
7 0141 0732 1303 1935
8 0216 0811 1344 2015
0.37 1.33 0.50 1.84
• New Moon • First Quarter • Full Moon • Last Quarter
•
4 0513 1.17 1046 0.66 1728 1.58
5 0020 0607 1136 1814
0.57 1.20 0.63 1.65
6 0102 0652 1221 1856
0.29 1.41 0.45 1.85
11 0407 1011 1554 2215
0.28 1.45 0.45 1.80
12 0446 1055 1644 2300
0.29 1.48 0.47 1.72
13 0527 0.33 1142 1.51 1737 0.50 2347 1.60
14 0609 0.38 1232 1.54 1838 0.55
15 0041 0657 1328 1948
1.46 0.45 1.56 0.57
17 0301 0853 1538 2230
1.25 0.56 1.64 0.50
18 0422 1001 1645 2341
1.22 0.57 1.72 0.41
19 0534 1.25 1106 0.54 1746 1.80
20 0039 0633 1206 1842
0.32 1.31 0.49 1.87
21 0129 0724 1300 1931
22 0213 0810 1349 2017
0.22 1.42 0.40 1.90
24 0331 0933 1519 2141
0.25 1.47 0.41 1.76
25 0407 1013 1602 2218
0.31 1.47 0.46 1.65
26 0441 1051 1645 2255
27 0512 1130 1730 2332
0.45 1.46 0.58 1.39
29 0015 0619 1254 1919
1.28 0.59 1.43 0.69
0.38 1.47 0.52 1.52
0.49 1.24 0.59 1.72
0.42 1.29 0.54 1.79
0.25 1.37 0.43 1.91
28 0544 0.52 1210 1.45 1820 0.64
•
then went to the Coles Express where he allegedly set upon the man inside the supermarket, before dragging him by the ankles outside where he continued the assault.
Innovative but illegal.
Alleged Crimes of the East Words Gary Larson How not to transport whitegoods A car stopped by police on Oxford Street, Bondi Junction, had a large fridge precariously strapped above the boot. If one of the thin straps had given way, it could have had lethal consequences. The male driver received an infringement notice for an unsecure load and had to make alternative arrangements for transporting the fridge. Police counselled him about the advantages of using trailers for transporting heavy, bulky items. Police say Bra Boy broke pensioner’s hip A member of Maroubra’s Bra Boy gang has appeared in court charged with a serious assault on an elderly man at a Coles Express service station in Kingsford. Jed Campbell, 44, is said to have kicked and punched the 74-year-old, who sustained a broken hip and facial injuries. According to police, there had been an earlier interaction in the service station carpark between the dementia sufferer and Campbell’s wife, who then drove home and told her husband about it. Campbell 36 The Beast August 2021
Junction doctor in court on sex charges A Bondi Junction GP has faced court accused of inappropriately touching three female patients. Andrew Su Lin, 36, appeared in Waverley Court charged with three counts of sexual touching without consent and two counts of common assault. He is said to have been employed at Myhealth in Bondi Junction’s Westfield at the time of the offences. Not much relief for Caddick’s cheated investors The Federal Court has heard that investors may still be owed up to $24 million after the assets of fraudster Melissa Caddick are sold. Australian Securities and Investments Commission counsel, Farid Assaf SC, told the court the deposit and mortgage payments on her Dover Heights home came from the funds of her 72 investors. So did an Edgecliff penthouse, an Audi, a Mercedes, jewellery and other assets. Caddick is believed to have flung herself from a Dover Heights cliff the day after financial investigators raided her home last November. Three months later, the remains of a foot found on a South Coast beach were DNA-matched to the missing fund manager. Gay hate murder reward Wanted: the cowards who beat Raymond Keam to death in a Randwick park 34 years ago. It is hoped someone who knows something will come forward after NSW Police posted a $1
million reward for information leading to a conviction for the notorious gay hate crime. Mr Keam had a black belt in karate and knew how to look after himself, pointing to the likelihood of multiple attackers as he was set upon in Alison Park in the early hours of January 13, 1987. A post mortem revealed he died from severe head injuries. Maroubra man arrested in ANOM blitz Maroubra man Brian Blackman is among those swept up in an international crack-down on organised criminals using the encrypted message service ANOM. The 51-year-old former Lone Wolf bikie was arrested at his home and charged with conspiracy to import a commercial quantity of cocaine and dealing with more than $1 million in proceeds of crime. It is alleged Blackman was part of a syndicate which arranged the importation of 1.2 tonnes of cocaine by sea. He is one of hundreds of alleged criminals caught worldwide through the ANOM app, created and monitored by the FBI, with close Australian Federal Police involvement. Teenagers stole cars - police Six teenagers who allegedly stole two cars from homes in Dover Heights and Vaucluse were arrested in the Western Suburbs. Aged from 14 to 19, they are said to have taken a Volkswagen Golf hatchback and a Mercedes SUV in the early hours, then driven them to the North Shore. Here the Merc was abandoned and the joyriders piled into the VW. It was tracked to Hebersham, where the arrests took place. It is understood that the vehicles are not in the best of shape.
but what has been the cost of all these lockdowns? COVID isn’t going away any time soon. We need to have a way to deal with this before the next pandemic arrives.
Poveglia, the island of no return.
The Unreliable Guide To... F*ckwittery Words Nat Shepherd Photo Silvio Berlusconi The Unreliable Guide is pissed off. At the time of writing, Sydney has been locked down for a week and we have at least another week to go. And we are not alone. More than half of the Australian population are currently locked down. While it seems clear that this is a sensible precaution to prevent a massive outbreak, I have to ask why the hell are we in this position in the first place? Time and time again these leaks from quarantine have caused massive social and economic disruption. Politicians have used public fear for their own agenda. And nothing changes. Well I have had enough. For what it’s worth, here’s my solution for a long-term prevention of this chaos. Offshore Quarantine As you may well know, the word ‘quarantine’ comes from Venice in Italy. During the years of the black plague all newcomers to that fabulous floating city were obliged to spend forty days (the
Italian for forty is quaranta) on the island of Poveglia, outside the city limits. Those who survived this were allowed to enter. This worked very well. So why, some two-hundred and fifty years later, are we being so obtuse? Australia has many offshore islands. We are quite happy to fling our poor refugees onto them, so why not use some tax dollars and build a purposebuilt offshore quarantine facility with healthcare facilities? This seems so obvious to me, but then I’m not a politician. If we had a quality offshore facility we would not have to cap the number of poor Aussies desperately trying to get home. We could allow people in, they would stay on the island for the requisite number of weeks, get their COVID-free certificate and then be flown onshore by a fully vaccinated crew. Then there would be no chance of guards, cleaners or limousine drivers spreading the virus into the community. Why is this not possible? Sure it would cost,
Vaccination Our other weapon of course is vaccination. But with the current levels of vaccine uncertainty coupled with a government that couldn’t organise a piss-up in a brewery, we seem unlikely to hit the required herd immunity any time soon. The US have noted this vaccination resistance within their own population and are pushing forward on rolling out the Novavax vaccine. This has shown no serious side effects whatsoever and uses tried and tested methods to vaccinate. We have ordered 51 million doses of this and it has been declared the most likely vaccination for 2022 due to its high efficacy versus the virus and its lack of side effects. Yet the government are still pushing forward on the contentious AstraZeneca and the mRNA Pfizer/Moderna vaccines. Why? Maybe because they are made by high profile multinationals? Who can say? But the mixed messages about these vaccines, especially the AstraZeneca, which was deemed fine for over fifties one week, only over sixties the next, and then under forties the next, does not inspire public confidence. Finally, The Unreliable Guide suspects you are all having these thoughts right now. We feel like a flock of sheep whose shepherd appears to have taken a huge dose of some psychedelic drug and is wandering around talking to moonbeams and flowers. Meanwhile the sheepdogs are in charge and they have no idea what to do either. I guess we just have to mask-up and hunker down and see what happens next. August 2021 The Beast 37
To bee or not to bee.
What to Do During Lockdowns Words Dr Marjorie O'Neill, Member for Coogee Photo Bee Yonsay Over the last few weeks, I have had plenty of chats with friends, family and constituents who have been desperate to find interesting and permissible things to do, either alone or with family. It has been particularly challenging for those with school aged children whose holiday plans were abruptly impacted by a lockdown. Trying to keep everyone entertained while adhering to the NSW health orders has not been easy for many, especially those families living in small apartments. Here are three low-cost activities to keep you and your family busy while helping out the environment along the way. 1. Adopt a drain Did you know that every street in the Randwick local government area has stormwater drains? When it rains, the water flows down the street and into the drains. Along the way, the water picks up whatever is left on the street and carries it along. These stormwater drains empty into our beaches, ponds and river systems. The most effective way to reduce stormwater pollution is by stopping it entering the system in the first place and making sure that we all take responsibility for putting our trash in 38 The Beast August 2021
the bin. If you would like to do a bit more, you can formally ‘adopt a drain’, give it a name and download a certificate of adoption, which you can share on social media. Regularly clean your drain (especially before a downpour) to make sure trash and waste does not end up where it shouldn’t. I have personally adopted a drain outside my office, named Derik, that my office staff and I care for. You can learn more at www.randwick.nsw.gov.au/ services/health-environmentand-regulation/pollution/ beach-pollution. 2. Build a bee bath Times are tough for the tinyyet-important bee. Climate change, pollution and pesticides are causing bee colonies to disappear globally. Since the 1940s, bee populations have steadily been on the downturn. Creating a bee friendly garden is a wonderful way to help bees, but there is more to this than just growing flowers. The phrase ‘busy bee’ didn’t just spring from nowhere. Collecting pollen is thirsty work! Unfortunately, bees don’t land with much finesse. By making a bee bath in your backyard, on your balcony, on your street verge or any other clever place
you can identify, you will help our fuzzy friends stay hydrated and avoid crash-landing in deep water where they can drown. All you need is a shallow dish, stones or marbles and fresh water. Select a spot that is shady and protected. Fill your shallow dish with marbles or stones, then simply fill it with just enough water so the rocks or marbles are not submerged. You can also have some fun decorating the stones and dish. 3. Take three (or more) for the sea on your daily walk As part of the NSW health orders, one of the reasons you are permitted to leave the house is for exercise. Next time you head out for a walk, I suggest bringing a bag and gloves to pick up some rubbish along the way. Small things left on the side of our streets like wrappers and plastics end up in our waterways and contribute to beach and ocean water pollution. You can make this a game and see who can pick up the most trash. If we each take three (or more) for the sea, we are all doing our little bit to keep our beaches and oceans clean. Over the past few weeks we have once again witnessed amazing acts of kindness and generosity throughout the east, including many offers of help to those in high-risk groups facing greater isolation. We have also seen a blossoming in creativity, with an abundance of freshly painted rocks and garden pots, bottles recycled into gorgeous vertical gardens and plant cuttings galore. If you have an idea for lowcost fun activity that benefits our environment, particularly if it is something we can do during a lockdown, please share it on your social media and let me know by tagging me. It is always good to be prepared! And some things are just worth doing, even if we are not in lockdown!
Coogee Voice
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Dr Marjorie O'Neill MP
Member for Coogee If you have any issues at all that you require assistance with, please do not hesitate to contact my office on 9398 1822, email coogee@parliament.nsw.gov.au, or come in at 15/53-55 Frenchmans Road, Randwick.
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Catch me if you can.
Run, Run, as Fast as You Can Words Jeremy Ireland I’ve joined a book club. I’ve never been in a book club before, and in all honesty, despite knowing we all read the same book and talk about it, I have no idea what to expect. Fortunately, someone else chose the title, Sapiens - A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari. It’s about how our species, Homo Sapiens, rose to the top of the animal kingdom. It turned out to be quite a page turner. One of the themes really caught my attention. Around 30,000 years ago we were classified as hunters and gatherers, belonging to a tribe within a group of tribes called ‘bands’. It was not uncommon for the males of such bands to spread their seed far and wide, frequently resulting in the mother not knowing exactly who the father was. As the father was not often sure which kids were his, he would often show equal concern for all the kids in the tribe. Unlike today, tribes were not composed of nuclear families that centred on monogamy. Proponents of this ‘ancient commune’ concept state that 40 The Beast August 2021
in today’s modern society most marriages end in divorce, with the fallout leaving psychological complexes on children and adults alike. Regardless of the original intent, forcing humans to live in nuclear families and have monogamous relationships can be “incompatible with our biological software”. Others may disagree, stating that nuclear families and monogamy are core human behaviours. Either way, it seems that in today’s society monogamy is the norm, with the average nuclear family in Australia having their 2.2 children. The problem is, just last year the divorce rate in Australia hit an all-time high of 47 per cent - nearly one in two marriages, 50/50, heads or tails! It’s a hard statistic to get your head around, but I see it as bad odds for the married couple and good odds for the divorce lawyer. According to divorcemag.com yes, there is such a site - many couples struggle with what is called the ‘pursuer-distancer’ dynamic. It is perhaps the most common reason couples fall out of love and stop being sexually intimate. This dynamic develops over time, slowly eroding the relationship to the point where it is untenable. John Gottman, who is considered the guru of marriage counselling, states that people “who get stuck in this pattern in the first few years have more than an 80 per cent chance of divorcing in the first four or five years”. In a nutshell, the ‘pursuerdistancer’ dynamic is when one partner chases or pursues and the other partner withdraws or distances themselves. Typically, the pursuer tends to be critical and aggressive, with the distancer responding by withdrawing and thus becoming distant and defensive. It is extremely common in a marriage or intimate relationship for one
person to blame the other when their needs are not being met, often leading couples to fight over the same issues repeatedly. This pattern leads to frustration, anger and resentment. Normally these emotions intensify over time, especially when both partners feel they aren’t on the same page anymore. The real problem, however, is that eventually the pursuing and distancing can become ingrained because the behaviour of one partner provokes and maintains the behaviour of the other. It can be a chronic cyclic problem that can make a relationship become dysfunctional if it’s not addressed. It’s the classic, ‘the more one chases, the more the other runs away’ scenario. If it feels like you’re the one who always initiates and attempts to get their partner to open up but with minimal effect, you may be the pursuer. If you’re the one who feels you’re being pressured and all you want to do is retreat and seek alone time, especially when under stress, than you are most likely the distancer. In turn, this increases the pursuer’s intensity and need for closeness, thus their desire to pursue. You can see how this dynamic can turn into a vicious cycle. More often than not, the distancer is not aware how distressed their partner is and will often be surprised when the pursuer finally pulls the plug. There are many solutions, but a critical one is to strike a balance between alone time and together time that works for the two of you. Communication is the key here. If you feel like you are caught in such a cycle, professional help is recommended. Have you got a question? Please contact Jeremy at bondicounsellingservices.com.
The former surf hand planing champion of the world.
Death and Taxes Words Rob Shears Photo Deborah Read “In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.” Benjamin Franklin would love to be alive today. Both death and taxes are becoming less certain. Australia has one of the best retirement schemes in the world. Superannuation is a very generous system that allows retirees to pay little to no tax in retirement. For an Australian couple with a multi-million dollar home and around $6 million in assets, you can structure your affairs to pay essentially very little to zero tax. How? Primary residences are not subject to income tax, land tax or capital gains tax. As of July 1, superannuation tax-free pensions have now increased to $1.7 million. With two allocated pensions of $1.7 million each, a couple could have $3.4 million in the tax-free stage of their retirement.
Add to this around $2.6 million in defensive assets outside super earning 1.4 per cent. This income can be spread over two $18,200 tax free thresholds to also be tax free. So, a couple could live essentially tax free with around $6 million in investible assets and a multi-million dollar house. What a time to be alive! We are also entering a world where death may not be a certainty in the timeframe that everyone expects. There are a number of companies working hard to solve the ageing problem. Expert longevity specialist Aubrey de Grey from the SENS Research Foundation, believes there is a 50 per cent chance we solve the ageing puzzle in the next 15 years. While this sounds like science fiction, it may be more likely than many can comprehend. Exciting new genome sequencing research
is intersecting with increases in computing power allowing frontier research to make large strides in recent years. Few understand the exponential increase in computing power combining with more data in recent years, which should lead to insights that were simply not possible a decade ago. While the outcome from these research projects is unknowable, it has been a mistake to bet against human ingenuity over the centuries. One of the outcomes from the low rate environment and essentially free money is that funding for start-ups has never been easier. This is leading to countless frauds in this space, however there are a number of promising companies that are utilising the free-flowing money for promising research projects. Verily Life Sciences, a subsidiary of Alphabet (Google), is one of the companies working on the problem. With Alphabet’s $135 billion cash pile as a backing for the subsidiary, there is decent potential for a breakthrough. If Aubrey is off in his estimations on the timing of longevity increases, it is still highly likely that life expectancies continue to increase over the coming decades. In the last 50 years, life expectancies in Australia have increased from 71.2 to 82.5 years. Again, what a time to be alive! Rob Shears is an Authorised Representative of Valor Financial Group (AFSL 405452). This advice is general and does not take into account your objectives, financial situation or needs. You should consider whether the advice is suitable for you and your personal circumstances. August 2021 The Beast 41
6. Synchronised Swimming Team and individual synchronised swimming events will be held at Bronte Baths. Every local resident is required to attend at least one session, because it’s not an Olympics without watching hour after hour of Aussie swimmers in sequins. 7. Fencing Athletes must use a sabre, foil or epee to fight off fearless seagulls while attempting to eat a full meal of fish and chips without losing a single chip to the ubiquitous birds. 8. Dog Fights Mackenzies Bay will host fights to the death between off-leash pooches, while local parks, beaches and playgrounds will host fatal fights between dogs and innocent children. The synchronised swimming will be held at Bronte this year.
The Eastern Suburbs Olympics Satire Kieran Blake, kieranblakewriter.org Photo Esther Williams Our region’s best athletes will fight for suburban supremacy in the inaugural Eastern Suburbs Olympics during July and August. Super-talented locals will represent their suburbs in the IOC-sanctioned event and will compete for gold, silver and bronze across the following specifically-designed sports: 1. Coffee Cup Relay Teams of four must pass a large, full, disposable, branded coffee cup along the coastal walk from Bondi to Coogee while swerving between weekend traffic and selfie addicts. 2. Shore Dump Gymnastics Gymnasts must perform the most creative and acrobatic tricks in the Coogee shorey, without breaking their neck. 42 The Beast August 2021
3. Bodysurfing Whompers must bodysurf between the flags at Bondi Beach and make it all the way to the sand without smashing headlong into a swimmer. 4. Beach Volleyball Boxing Tamarama and Bondi Beaches will host this exciting hybrid sport. Spiking your opponent in the head equals one point, knocking them out earns two points and spiking a nearby child in the head equals six and out. 5. Rabbit Hunting Hunt the feral rabbits at north Clovelly headland and earn a point for every skin. Avoid killing any of the rabbits who are completing their recovery session at Clovelly Beach.
9. Sandcastles Competitors will have just one day to secure a DA, receive a Homebuilder grant and construct an elaborate sandcastle to be built by the region’s best architects and tradies. The top eight sandcastles will be judged by nosy neighbours and S. Cam, if the IOC can afford his appearance fee. 10. A Gruelling Challenge Run the City2Surf in under 60 minutes while dragging at least one school child, dog, baby, pram, school bags, instrument, scooters, helmets, projects… Athletes can compete in just one event, or contest all ten disciplines for the right to be crowned the greatest athlete in the East. To honour the ancient Olympics, and the spectators, every event will be contested nude. Competitors wearing sluggos or boardies will be disqualified, and women in Brazilian bikinis risk appearing on the front cover of The Beast.
Left to right: Talented trio Kurt, Zac and Alex.
Making Music: Lure Words Alasdair McClintock @aldothewriter Photos Byron Keene Remember when prog-rock dominated the airwaves? Before SoundCloud rappers and indiegirl-pop took over the radio, black t-shirts were in and bands like Cog and Dead Letter Circus belted out heavy, double-kick anthems that you felt deep within your chest. Well, it’s coming back, and Sydney band Lure is joining the party. Lure is Kurt De Battista (Guitar/Vocals), Zac Carmont (Drums/Electronics) and Alex Clipper (Bass). In late 2018, Kurt and Zac met on what’s known as ‘Tinder for bands’, BandMix, when his band was looking for a drummer. They clicked musically after the first jam and, following a series of gigs, the band morphed into Lure at the start of 2020. “Our style is hard hitting, progressive rock with melodic vocals,” Zac told The Beast. “It is designed to take listeners on a musical voyage through ebbs and flows of nuance, with thick sections of riffage, heavy tribal drums and grounding
bass topped with electronic elements. We’re guided by the emerging sounds of ‘70‘90s rock, with a grunge and scorched attack. The vocals target underlying issues in today’s society,” Zac explained. Today’s society is a mess of a thing - I think we can all agree and when Lure aren’t jamming or gigging (COVID-19 allowing), they are doing “general human things - sleeping, eating, etc.” “We do the work with the nine to fivers, but when we’re not rehearsing or working on new material we’re generally trying to switch off. We’re pretty hell bent on a good feed and are mad coffee nuts. On the warmer days, we enjoy an early morning dip or a quick wave. We all try to keep relatively fit and healthy away from massive benders with the likes of Leigh Perrie.” It’s a very Sydney lifestyle and the band think there is plenty of hope for the city to emerge from what has been a tough period for everybody, especially musicians.
“To be frank, there’s some phenomenal bands kicking about Sydney and the Eastern Suburbs at the moment. It’d be great to see more support from councils and the like to assist artists.” The list of bands they’re referring to reads like a who’s who of guitar heavy local acts: Northlane, Polaris, Gully Days, Frankie’s World Famous House Band and many more. As for the band’s influences, “We all have quite eclectic tastes, so it might be a shorter list stating what we are not influenced by, but for the best part we’re mostly influenced by ‘70-‘90s rock, yet pull influence from more modern heavier and edgy styles of rock like Live, Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, Cog, Free, Plini, Rage Against the Machine, Nirvana, Deftones, Tool and of course the almighty Bee Gees.” You can listen to Lure’s new single, Jeffery’s House, and B-side, Compression, on Spotify and, lockdowns aside, keep up to date with shows via their Instagram @luretheband. Give them a follow!
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Golden brown, texture like sun.
Flaky Fish Pie Words and Photo Dana Sims Instagram @stone_and_twine Here’s something to give you comfort, nostalgia and a taste of Sydney’s best produce. It’s a recipe keeping with tradition; fish, prawns, stock, leek, potato, wine, mustard, cream, herbs and a flaky, golden lid of pastry - honestly, what could be better? Support your local fish shop and get the freshest seafood available. Spend time developing and balancing the sauce (taste as you go) and you’ll be impressed with the end result. Throw some green leaves together, tear up some crusty baguette and chill the white wine. It’s winter, we’ll survive another lockdown but we all need some love! Ingredients (serves 6) 700gm fresh ling fillets, largely diced 600gm fresh green prawns, 44 The Beast August 2021
peeled, deveined and diced 2 large potatoes, peeled, diced 1 leek, finely diced 1 celery stick, finely diced 1 clove garlic, crushed 20gm butter 25gm plain flour 400ml fish or vegetable stock 250ml white wine 1 tbs Dijon mustard 150ml pouring cream 2 tbs parsley, finely chopped 1 tbs chives, finely chopped Fresh black pepper Sea salt 1½ sheets puff pastry, thawed 1 egg, beaten Lemon wedges, to serve Method 1. Preheat the oven to 200°C (a piping hot oven is the key to golden brown, flaky pastry). 2. In a small saucepan of boiling water, cook the diced potato until al dente. Drain and set aside for later.
3. In a large saucepan on medium heat, add the olive oil, celery, leek and garlic. Sautee until softened for 5-7 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add the butter and when melted, add in the flour. 4. Stir quickly to cook out the flour, then add the white wine. Let the wine reduce, before adding the Dijon mustard. Gradually and slowly add the stock and stir to keep lumps from forming. 5. Once the sauce has thickened (coats the back of a spoon), add in the cream, sea salt and black pepper to taste (peppery is good). Cook for a further 2 minutes, then remove the pan from the heat and stir in the parsley and chives. 6. Transfer the prepared fish and prawns and the cooked potato to a large oval baking dish and spread evenly. Pour over the sauce and gently stir it through the pie filling. 7. Take your thawed puff pastry and lay it over the pie filling. Trim the edges to fit your baking dish. With a knife, make a small cross in the centre of the pastry to allow the steam to escape while cooking. Lightly brush the pastry with the egg wash and place it in the hot oven to bake for 30-35 minutes until the fish is cooked through and the pastry is golden brown. 8. Remove from the oven and serve with a green salad, crusty bread and wedges of lemon. Dana Sims is a Sydneybased food and prop stylist who has grown up in the Eastern Suburbs and loves to create delicious food for entertaining and family. She is inspired by the fresh produce we have access to here in Sydney. For ideas, recipes and styling inspiration, check out her Instagram, @stone_and_twine.
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Subject Landing gear Location Bronte Photographer Brittany Robbins
Subject Morning Rush Location Coogee Photographer Theresia Hall @theresia.g.hall
Subject Giles Baths boulder Location Coogee Photographer Theresia Hall @theresia.g.hall
Subject Angelic Location Bondi Junction Photographer Graeme Bogan
Subject Cormac and his furry friend Location Rushcutters Bay Photographer Liz Raleigh
Subject Winter reflections Location Centennial Park Photographer Juan Rojas
The Beast Magazine wants your local photos!
Subject Monumental Location Coogee Photographer Theresia Hall @theresia.g.hall
Subject Shining through Location Centennial Park Photographer Mary Lin
Subject Rainbow warriors Location Coogee Photographer Michelle Johnson
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Please send them to photos@thebeast.com.au
CROWDED HOUSE Dreamers Are Waiting Label BMG Reviewer @aldothewriter Rating I don’t know about you, but Neil Finn’s voice takes me back to the happy days of my childhood and soothes even the worst of moods - nostalgia is a powerful drug. Inarguably Australia’s favourite kiwi, Finn has been joined by his sons and with them they’ve brought a breath of youthful energy. There’s twinges of Tame Impala and even the Arctic Monkeys’ last album. You get the feeling Finn is enjoying flirting with the youth; not in a creepy, old man at a nightclub way though. None of these songs would make the Greatest Hits, but it’s all very enjoyable.
TYLER, THE CREATOR CALL ME IF YOU GET LOST Label Matador Records Reviewer @aldothewriter Rating
LITTLE JOE Genre Sci-Fi Drama Thriller Reviewer Linda Heller-Salvador If you take the concept of Invasion Of The Body Snatchers, add a pinch of Little Shop Of Horrors, a good dose of psychotropic drugs and a sonically surreal soundtrack then you will be part way to describing Little Joe, the delightfully fiendish and intriguingly eerie film that is director Jessica Hausner’s (Lourdes) English language debut. Things are not quite what they seem when Alice (Emily Beecham), a dedicated botanist, genetically engineers a strain of mood-lifting, antidepressant plants that, when cared for, like a botanical Tamagotchi, respond in a very peculiar manner. After taking one home for her young son Joe (Kit Connor), she begins to notice subtle yet disquieting changes in his demeanour. Hyper-stylising with retro colouring in a crisp minimalistic fashion enhances the overall quirky aesthetics of this subtly sinister Brothers Grimm style fairy tale. There are a plethora of ways to interpret this artful film, one being the unsettling preoccupation of society’s need for unmindful happiness and instant gratification. 48 The Beast August 2021
There is something undeniably fascinating about this guy. Is he messing with everybody? Playing a character? Or genuinely who he appears to be? I used to think Kanye was messing with us, but now realise how horribly wrong I was. Regardless, CALL ME IF YOU GET LOST is a hell of a ride. Say what you like about Tyler, he creates some great music. His frenzied arrogance is both disgusting, yet hypnotically attractive. I would love to write a deep dive into him and how he fits in our society, but I don’t have the time and no one would read it.
MODEST MOUSE The Golden Casket Label Epic Records Reviewer @aldothewriter Rating Wow. I did not expect this to be so good. A lot of these old bands reappearing have been punching out some tired efforts, but not Modest Mouse, they still have the rage after all these years! Which is a worry, in some ways, for them, but for us musical punters, it’s a massive win. They have their usual clunky verses rolling into catchy choruses, which fans of the band will be more than familiar with. The Golden Casket is like pulling on a comfortable sweater and dancing like an idiot with your siblings. It might be my favourite Modest Mouse album.
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ACROSS 1. Heart doctor (12) 7. Sour fruit (5) 8. Latin goddess (4) 9. Commotion (6) 11. Italian lawn bowls (5) 12. Income from capital investment paid in a series of regular payments (7) 15. Hawaiian greeting (5) 16. A solemn promise (4) 19. Abbreviation for a popular ball sport (2) 20. Declare invalid (5) 21. Burger, Big … (3) 22. Soft lizard (5) 23. Europe’s oldest capital (6) DOWN 1. Small electronic device used for adding,
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subtracting (10) 2. Dutch artist (9) 3. Region colonised by ancient Greeks (5) 4. Board game (4) 5. British slang for boss (6) 6. A greyish brown colour (5) 10. Greek white wine (7) 13. Abbreviated term for a person you share a room with (6) 14. A closed political meeting (6) 15. Metal or plastic sheath over the end of a shoelace (5) 17. Tropical plant whose leaves produce a thick liquid used in medicines and cosmetics (4) 18. An old, overworked horse (4)
Trivial Trivia Words Lisa Anderson Photo Theresia Hall Instagram @theresia.g.hall 1. Who was the only female competitor not to have to submit to a sex test at the 1976 Summer Olympics? 2. Which American actor has been staying in Tamarama during the recent lockdown? 3. In which NSW town did Matthew McConaughey spend his gap year in 1988?
4. How many Randwick players (male and female) will represent Australia in the Rugby Sevens at the 2021 Olympics? 5. Where would you find the ‘Big Blade’? 6. Which singer recently swam at the Aussie Swimming Trials? 7. What year was the NSW Police Force established?
8. Which player withdrew from the Australian Basketball Olympic team recently? 9. What American city is the location of the recent apartment tower collapse? 10. What do Barack Obama, Susan Boyle, Andrew Forrest and George Clooney have in common?
Coogee cascades. August 2021 The Beast 49
Libra Sep 24-Oct 23 It’s time to invest in some fresh new underwear and discard your rotting, fungus-filled ‘old faves’ for good.
Pisces Feb 20-Mar 20 Be careful not to apply the unreasonable standards you expect of others onto yourself. You’re special and deserve exception.
Scorpio Oct 24-Nov 22 You need to learn how to let go of a good thing at the right time, before the novelty wears off and it becomes a bad thing.
Aries Mar 21-Apr 20 Despite your lack of education and skills, you are superior to the average person because you reside in the Eastern Suburbs.
Visions Beardy from Hell
Sagittarius Nov 23-Dec 21 Take your lover on the romantic holiday they’ve been pushing for, so you can be more enthusiastic about going back to work.
Taurus Apr 21-May 21 If you’re not on the receiving end of at least two or three government grants or subsidies, it’s time to change industries.
Leo Jul 23-Aug 22 Despite an abundance of wellintentioned family and friends, the only person you can rely on in this world is you.
Capricorn Dec 22-Jan 20 You’ve probably got a week or two to start getting into shape, before it’s too late and you’ll be fat for another summer.
Gemini May 22-Jun 21 Try to postpone making any important decisions that can’t be changed at a later date, at least until your judgement improves.
Virgo Aug 23-Sep 23 Give a lazy man a fish and he will eat for a day, teach a lazy man to fish and he’ll end up dying of starvation.
Aquarius Jan 21-Feb 19 End an argument and move on once you’ve gotten your own way. Humiliating someone won’t advance your own self-interest.
Cancer Jun 22-Jul 22 There are valuable lessons to be learned in every conflict, so start as many arguments as possible in the interest of self-growth.
Star Signs
Trivial Trivia Solutions 1. Princess Anne 2. Neil Patrick Harris 3. Warnervale 4. 7 5. Snowtown, South Australia 6. Cody Simpson 7. 1862 8. Ben Simmons 9. Miami, Florida 10. They all turn 60 this year
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