The Beast - May 2023

Page 48

BEAST

The
2023
May
Renny Pike

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CATHOLIC PRIMARY SCHOOL WOOLLAHRA OPE Friday 24 Fe Thursday 2 | Friday 24 March 2023|9:30-10:30am Friday 5 May 2023|9:30-10:30am Thursday 18 May 2023|9:30-10:30am For More Information Holy Cross Catholic Primary School 81 Edgecliff Rd, Bondi Junction 2022 02 9369 3233 | info@hcpswoollahra.catholic.edu.au| www.hcpswoollahra.catholic.edu.au can holycrosswoollahra holycrossprimarywoollahra enrolling now for 2024 Primary School Woollahra enrolling now for 2023 Holy Cross CATHOLIC PRIMARY SCHOOL WOOLLAHRA OP Friday 2 Thursday 2 March 2023 |9:30-10:30am Friday 24 March 2023|9:30-10:30am Friday 5 May 2023|9:30-10:30am Thursday 18 May 2023|9:30-10:30am For More Information Holy Cross Catholic Primary School 81 Edgecliff Rd, Bondi Junction 2022 02 9369 3233 | info@hcpswoollahra.catholic.edu.au| www.hcpswoollahra.catholic.edu.au holycrossprimarywoollahra enrolling now for 2024 Primary School Woollahra enrolling now for 2023 Holy Cross CATHOLIC PRIMARY SCHOOL WOOLLAHRA OP Friday 24 February 2023|9:30 10:30am Thursday 2 March 2023 |9:30-10:30am Friday 24 March 2023|9:30-10:30am Friday 5 May 2023|9:30-10:30am Thursday 18 May 2023|9:30-10:30am For More Information Holy Cross Catholic Primary School 81 Edgecliff Rd, Bondi Junction 2022 02 9369 3233 | info@hcpswoollahra.catholic.edu.au| www.hcpswoollahra.catholic.edu.au holycrossprimarywoollahra enrolling now for 2024 Now accepting enrolments for 2024 Holy Cross Catholic Primary School Woollahra enrolling now for 2023 Holy Cross THOLIC PRIMARY SCHOOL WOOLLAHRA OPE Friday 24 F Thursday 2 March 2023 |9:30-10:30am Friday 24 March 2023|9:30-10:30am Friday 5 May 2023|9:30-10:30am Thursday 18 May 2023|9:30-10:30am For More Information Holy Cross Catholic Primary School 81 Edgecliff Rd, Bondi Junction 2022 02 9369 3233 | info@hcpswoollahra.catholic.edu.au| www.hcpswoollahra.catholic.edu.au enrolling now for 2024 Holy Cr Prim Wo enrollin Holy Cro CATHOLIC PRIMARY SCHOOL WOO OPEN DAY Friday 24 February 2023|9:30-10: Thursday 2 March 2023 |9:30-10: Scan to enrol now holycrosswoollahra holycrossprimarywoollahra enrolling now for 2024 Please scan to enrol Holy Cross Ca Primary Sch Woollahr enrolling now for Holy Cros CATHOLIC PRIMARY SCHOOL WOOLLAHR OPEN DAYS Friday 24 February 2023|9:30-10:30am Thursday 2 March 2023 |9:30-10:30am Friday 24 March 2023|9:30-10:30am Friday 5 May 2023|9:30-10:30am Thursday 18 May 2023|9:30 10:30am Scan to enrol now holycrosswoollahra holycrossprimarywoollahra enrolling now for 2024 OPEN DAYS Friday 5 May 2023 | 9:30-10:30am Thursday 18 May 2023 | 9:30 -10:30am Thursday 25 May 2023 | 9:30 -10:30am

Transcendence

Welcome to the May 2023 edition of The Beast, the monthly magazine for Sydney’s democratic (sorry if I’ve used this one before) beaches of the east. Firstly, congratulations to NSW parliamentary candidates Kellie Sloane, Marjorie O’Neill and Michael Daley on their respective victories in the seats of Vaucluse, Coogee and Maroubra at the recent state election - no surprises there.

Renny Pike is this month’s cover artist, and the elusive local talent will be showcasing a full series of drawings in an exhibition curated by none other than local artist (and the painter of our June 2021 edition cover) Caleb Reid at Chippendale’s Goodspace Gallery on May 10. Renny’s artwork will also appear on the streets of Coogee as the next mural for The Alfreda Street Project, which you’ll be able to check out at 27 Alfreda Street, Coogee from early May.

Readers of The Beast are invited to join Wentworth MP Allegra Spender and Australian film and television director, producer and screenwriter Rachel Perkins for the launch of ‘Wentworth for the Voice’ at Bronte Surf Life Saving Club on May 15. Wentworth for the Voice is a network of local individuals, businesses, community groups and councils, convened and supported by Allegra, who is also co-chair of the Parliamentary Friends of The Uluru Statement From The Heart. Their aim is to engage the people of Wentworth in a respectful dialogue on the Voice and to take up the generous invitation in the Uluru Statement from the Heart to walk with First Nations people for a better future by passing the Voice referendum in Wentworth.

Wentworth for the Voice is working to mobilise community education, kitchen table conversations and events around Wentworth in the lead up to the referendum later this year so that voters can make well-informed decisions. For more information

and to RSVP, please visit www.allegraspender.com.au.

Enshrining a First Nations

Voice in our constitution should transcend politics, despite some idiots at the federal level attempting to politicise the issue. Honestly though, anyone who votes against this really needs to take a good hard look at themselves, and possibly give themselves an uppercut. Enjoy the mag!

The Beast

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McGrath - Double Bay

8 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
“Selling Beachside Real Estate for Twenty Years” Simon has been the ‘major sponsor’ of the Tamarama Surf Lifesaving Club since 2008
SOLD x SIMON
Welcome Note
• No.1 in mentoring boys • Unique Liberal Arts curriculum • South-East Sydney location Enrol today! Dare to think. Dare to know. Register to attend our next Parent Information Evening by scanning the QR code. 33 Banks Ave, Daceyville NSW 2032 Hartford College is an independent Catholic boys school, now accepting applications. hartfordcollege.nsw.edu.au
08 Welcome Note 10 Contents 12 Pearls of Wisdom 14 Monthly Mailbag 20 Local Artist 22 Local News 32 Crime News 34 Local Photos 36 The Unreliable Guide 38 Kieran's Satire 40 Headnoise 42 Marjorie's Musings 44 Fishing Report 45 Tide Chart 46 Dana's Recipe 48 Brainteasers 49 Album Reviews 50 Beardy from Hell 50 Trivia Solutions Bondi's Golden Light, by the one and only Billy Morris, www.billmorris.com.au. CONTENTS May 2023 Issue 220
11 Issue 220 May 2023 The Beast Helping local business and skilled workers with immigration Enjoy takeaway without the waste thanks to a new swap and wash system in Bondi. Simply purchase a rePlated Mealbox and swap it for a freshly cleaned Mealbox every time you order takeaway. Scan QR Code for more info. Making single-use packaging history! This project is a NSW Environment Protection Agency, Waste Less Recycle More initiative funded by the waste levy. With over 90 years of experience in Eastern Suburbs property, we get results. Call: 02 9387 1700 www.willsproperty.com.au

If We Must Have Male Politicians, at Least Make Them Pretty Ones

Congratulations to Marjorie O’Neill, whose wonderful work and advocacy for the community has resulted in her retaining the seat of Coogee for the ALP at the recent state election. And, congratulations to the people of NSW for electing an attractive looking premier, providing Pearl with eye candy for the next four years. Naturally, I prefer female politicians, but at Pearl’s age I’m seeking good-looking men, and there’s just not enough of them in parliament to keep me interested in the political process.

As a former political junky, I’ve become jaded by a political system run by vested interests, and I’m cynical enough to realise that both parties are

there to represent big business in the pursuit of infinite economic growth (when is enough, enough?) at the expense of the populace. If I must swallow their predictable rhetoric, at least provide me with something to look at, even if I vehemently disagree with the rubbish that comes out of their mouths.

Take Albanese for instance, a man of boring appearance with a droning voice. Perhaps his ridiculous devotion to nuclear submarines and tax cuts for the wealthy would be a lot more palatable if he was cut from the same cloth as Justin Trudeau (why is the ALP always running scared of wealthy people who never cast their ballot in Labor’s favour? They need Pearl advis-

ing them). I doubt very much my loathing of Scott Morrison would have been tempered had he been an attractive man, but if a conservative politician must throw a lump of coal around parliament, at least let that politician be a sexy dude, not a goofy, beetroot-faced buffoon. And, talking of sexy dudes, it would not surprise me if Christian Porter’s attractive (but sleaze contaminated) appearance has provided him with an escape clause in the Robodebt Royal Commission - despite being a champion of the scheme, his name was barely mentioned.

Seriously though, the people of NSW need to be congratulated for taking a stand against the growing extremism and blatant corruption of the LNP. Australians are a conservative lot; if the economy is booming, we have no interest in the machinations of politics, nor the welfare of our most vulnerable or the environment. We are even prepared to see peaceful protestors arrested and jailed for stints unbefitting of the supposed crime. But when Gladys fell on her own sword (wielded by a corrupt political paramour) and the premier’s baton was passed to a man of archly conservative ideology with a family embroiled in corruption allegations involving developers, I think something twigged. Add to this the hilarious antics of a litigious John Barilaro and perhaps the people of NSW had just had enough of the LNP and their fringe views.

Give us politicians of Marjorie’s ilk, compassion and intelligence (I would love to see Kylie von Muenster ditch the LNP and reinvent herself as a Teal), and if we must have male politicians at the helm, at least make them pretty ones, with nice voices. Think Justin Trudeau, Gabriel Boric and Emmanuel Macron – swoon!

12 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Words Pearl Bullivant Photo Anna Minns
Pearls of Wisdom
Too young for old Pearly.

Randwick Girls' High School

Randwick Girls' High School is the only public non-fee paying single sex girls' comprehensive school in Sydney's Eastern Suburbs. We are a 7-12 High School...

We offer an extremely broad curriculum

• Our curriculum is ever expanding and now includes: Engineering Studies, Woodwork, STEM, Multimedia and Hebrew

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We have a legacy in individual and group achievement in Sports

• Students can trial to compete against other schools at a zone, regional and state level in knockout sports competitions, gala days and a vast range of sports and physical activities.

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• Our alumni are a repository for memories, endorse history and are our greatest advocates. If you attended Randwick Girls' High School, we would be delighted to hear from you. Please email your current information (name, years attended, contact information and a brief bio of your career and achievements).

If you are interested in enrolling in our school, please contact us to join one of our school tours. Barker Street, Randwick NSW Email

randwickg-h.school@det.nsw.gov.au
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The Beast's Monthly Mailbag

Words The Informed People of the Eastern Beaches

Bus Shelters

Every time I await a bus at the various shelters, I cry. When I heard the news they were being upgraded, I was ecstatic. Imagine my disappointment when the new structures were no improvement at all, but probably cost Council/ ratepayers a lot of money.

At my North Bondi terminal, they DO NOT protect us from the baking sun, or the pouring rain, or the chilly winds. In fact, I’m not sure what they are good for. Who designed these inadequate structures, who approved their unacceptable design, who thought they were fantastic?

If JC Decaux provided a design, did anyone in Council’s approval section question their acceptability? I think we ought to know who makes such ludicrous decisions, because these people do not travel on the buses at all in the Eastern Suburbs. It is beyond belief that these shelters are so unsuitable for the purpose. Am I the only one that feels this way?

Disabled Access

Dear Editor - I am writing this letter to inform your readers of the newly installed disabled access to our post office at 127 Bondi Road, Bondi. This local post office has a proud history of serving the local community from its beautiful heritage building for around 100 years.

In recent times the business has grown and the customer count has increased significantly. Some of our customers couldn’t access the post office because of the stairs at the entrance, so we have installed a new ramp with permission from Waverley Council so that these customers have easy access.

Through your local newspaper we would like to send a message that the new ramp has been installed and is now open to our customers. Thank you.

Cabanas Not a Symbol of Largesse

Dear Beast - Pearl Bullivant’s article, titled ‘The Eastern Suburbs Beaches’ Latest Must-Have Accoutrement’ in the April 2023 edition was utter garbage. Further, the gross generalisations contained within Pearl’s article were clearly written to serve her own agenda.

As someone who has suffered from skin cancer, I wish this sort of sun protection existed when I was a kid. Cabanas are not a status symbol, they simply offer a better design that better suits people’s needs than a traditional beach umbrella. That has been the cause of their popularity; they are not a “symbol of largesse,” as Pearl espouses in her article.

For those wanting the beach cabana banned from beaches, and for anyone in Waverley Council seriously listening to those people, good luck! Good luck being the people to ban families from protecting themselves from the long-term harmful effects of the sun when enjoying themselves in a public place. What an achievement you will have accomplished.

Wokery at Coogee

I applaud Russell Edwards for his lacerating critique of the ‘RacismNotWelcome’ street sign at Coogee Beach. Did Randwick Council not hear about the furore that the installation of these signs (as useless as they are smug) led to when they

were installed in Woollahra last year? Those signs barely survived a vote to remove them, as residents rightly abhorred the imputation that their neighbourhood was some racist enclave in need of thought control rebranding on its street corners (as if that’s where most racism happens).

Sigh... can local governments just grow up and drop this facile virtue signalling once and for all? They’re fooling nobody.

Have a Day Off, Pearl

I am not sure if your esteemed columnist Pearl is taking the piss (and if true I congratulate them for their genius), but has there ever been such a negative and self-righteous media figure (apologies for the generosity) in Australia?

Pearl used to be somewhat amusing when they ranted and raved to protect the weak and vulnerable working class from the “Cashed Up Bogans” who have apparently destroyed the tranquility of the most densely populated populace in Australia’s largest city. According to Pearl, there is nothing wrong with a bit of snobbery towards those deemed not worthy to live here.

Pearl had since moved on to protect us all from the diesel guzzling “Yummy Mummies” in their “troops SUVs”.

Now Pearl has regurgitated more bile and taken aim at the humble beach cabana, which is apparently a reflection of the “affluent human condition” from “thoughtless people” rather than a way to keep families out of the sun. Then, true to form, Pearl was able to connect the dots and link those trying to protect their skin with the evil Yummy Mummies and their SUVs (apparently these are not mutually exclusive).

A solution palatable to Pearl might be that families book a space at the beach (or apply for a licence), along with a government approved umbrella, and come from within a radius of two kilometres to enjoy our beaches. I am open for Pearl to provide further ideas, or just accept the fact that they are a NIMBY and go retire somewhere so they can avoid the crowds (and be a blow-in there).

One last thing for Pearl... The

14 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Monthly Mailbag

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great part of this country is that the beach is free for all to enjoy. Unfortunately the sun is harsh, and people now have an effective way to keep their family safe while enjoying our great area.

The irony of Pearl’s regular tirades is that due to the affluence of our area (who can blame people wanting to move here?) a substantial proportion of people who receive this magazine are now the evil Yummy Mummies Pearl has worked for years to protect us from.

If you’re taking the piss Pearl I apologise, but, for the sake of everyone, have a day off and write something positive for once.

Yours sincerely,

Charing Cross Heritage

Dear Editor - In relation to the article in your February 2023 edition, titled ‘Traders Hope for Minimum Disruption as Charing Cross upgrade Looms’... Communities are often blamed for using heritage to block developments. By deftly ignoring heritage altogether in its Charing Cross Streetscape Upgrade plans, Waverley Council has bypassed this potential obstruction. The community has seen no heritage strategy for this prized Urban Conservation Area, relatively intact and unique to Eastern Sydney. Plans are for engineering works to the road and footpaths; nothing to engage with building owners to restore the historic buildings, or to replace daggy awnings and ugly signs. Instead, wider footpaths, a narrower road, smart poles lining the street, trees obscuring building facades, power lines underground, replaced with 34 green electrical pillars littering the footpaths, trip hazards outside shopfronts, 34 smart poles replace 34 timber electricity posts... A randomly placed mid-block pedestrian crossing also ignores long held community calls for a logical crossing at Bellagio to the old Commonwealth Bank corner.

Charing Cross survived the arrival of Westfield in 2003, it has successfully survived the pandemic and is again trading well. Council seems blind to the reasons for this success. It is not a monoculture of cafés. The healthy diversity of businesses set up in historically small shops, visible and directly accessed

from the street, along with a rapid churn of kerbside parking, buses and local pedestrian and cyclist activity, maintains this hum of activity. Footpath width is traditional and historic. Small business owners are clever and adaptable, but the changes may be too great for their survival: loss of multiple kerbside parking spaces and fewer, squeezed and difficult remaining spaces; buses struggling through more crowded and narrowed travelling lanes, taking off wing mirrors and swiping opening car doors; no space for bikes. The enviable road safety record could be lost. Customers will avoid the centre.

Please, Council, get it right. Understand how heritage and circulation intersect to make Charing Cross successful. Survey businesses not about Council’s streetscape plans but about the operation, clientele, turnover, scale and business models, how they build their customer bases, how their customers travel. And, let heritage inform restoration, greening, posted awnings and visual delight.

Traders and residents should be worried about disruption during construction, but they should be much more worried about the long-term damage to the centre’s businesses and to its built heritage from Council’s own plans.

Reply to David Harrison

Well, Mr. Harrison (Politics, Letters, The Beast, April 2023), you obviously don’t travel much by public transport. This Liberal Government has done its best to destroy our wonderful bus system. You’re lucky you don’t live in Randwick, where we had four buses to go to Bondi Junction via Alison Road and now we only have one. There is no bus that goes to Circular Quay to/from Randwick now. The 356 that goes to Bondi Junction is so unreliable, and if you leave Bondi Junction after 3pm you are competing with school children to get a seat.

The buses should never have been privatised. Public transport is the responsibility of the government. Transdev also has the Manly ferries and is determined to get rid of the Freshwater class ferries. I can’t believe the Transport Minister was not listening to the

travelling public. It’s obvious he didn’t care and so the Libs deserve at least one term in opposition.

I am not a regular Labor voter, but Marjorie O’Neill has earned her place in NSW Parliament with her constant efforts, and not just showing up at election time.

Irresponsible Dog Owners

Dear Editor - Waverley Council has recently revamped the pocket park in Murray Street with good play equipment for small kids and shaded seating for parents. The sign on the gates clearly states that no dogs are to be off-leash or within ten metres of play equipment. Yet this morning there was a young mum and her child quietly sitting and playing, in walks a young woman with her dog off-leash, she’s playing with her mobile phone and throwing a ball to the dog. The ball bounces near the mum and child, the dog chases, and mum has to pick up her baby. The young woman with the dog mindlessly continues to talk on the phone.

In Bronte Park and Beach there are restrictions on where and when dogs can be off-leash. Kids’ playgrounds, bathing areas and change and toilet facilities are no dog zones. Yet Waverley rangers, either by design, policy or indolence, fail to enforce the very moderate restrictions as mandated by the Companion Animals Act. At a café I had the ‘pleasure’ of seeing two dog owners have an argument after one of their dogs cocked a leg at the table where the other was sitting.

Clearly, any sense of social responsibility and fairness is irrelevant to dog owners and their ludicrously named ‘fur babies’. It’s time Waverley Council started to enforce their legal obligations.

The Kindness of Strangers

I just want to say a big thank you to those who helped me when I had a bad fall near Woolies at Bronte on Sunday, March 12. I was cleaned and bandaged, and even given a bottle of water and some bandaids. It means a lot to me. Thanks, especially to Mark the first aider. May God bless you all.

16 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Monthly Mailbag
17 Issue 220 May 2023 The Beast Includes: Plumbing • Electrical • Tiling • Painting • Internal Structural Work Project managed by Regan Hendricks Design Studio: 1009 Botany Rd, Mascot Open Mon-Fri 9am-3pm (Sat by appointment only) Phone 9700 8660 Lic: 85335C www.kensingtonkitchensandbathrooms.com.au Reg Hendricks 0410 645 550 Regan Hendricks 0424 971 641 Kensington Kitchens & Bathrooms complete kitchen & bathroom renovations Est. 1979

Regulate, Regulate and Sanction

The Robodebt scandal was a moral and legal crime perpetrated on victims who are without effective remedy. There was no ‘live ear’ to hear their story or to investigate the abuse. This is an instance of a much more common affliction. How often have your readers sought to speak to a bank, a utility or a corporation to be met with a bot that understands nothing or a message stating, “We know that your time is valuable but due to exceptionally high demand we are unable to attend to your enquiry… etc.”

Corporations are routinely able to increase profits at their customers’ expense without effective pushback. Which political party has the courage to bring on legislation that will make duty of care to customers and due diligence stick? Solution? Regulate, regulate and sanction!

Bronte Pool Cliff Jumpers

Dear Beast - On any given warm weekend at Bronte Beach there is a plethora of (in no way is this meaning to be racist) large groups of people who I dare say are not locals, however most likely have travelled from about 35 kilometres southwest. Anyone is of course welcome at all areas and beaches in the area to enjoy the amazing surrounds which some of us are lucky to call home. However, the attitude some of them bring to our beaches is similar to that of the typical local Eastern Suburbs dog owner - complete contempt for anyone or anything else other than themselves.

They leave large amounts of rubbish at picnic booths with no intention of putting it in the bin, just metres from their location. They swear and shout obnoxiously at each other around small children and families, they double park their giant utes and SUVs for 15 minutes to load half a container ship into them with no regard for other road users.

What really gets me going though is their use of the Bronte Pool, and in particular the clearly (barbed wire) fenced off area, which is there to prevent people jumping off the edge into the shallow pool. Over the past hot weekends at Bronte I was using the pool with my 3-year-old daughter,

and we were very nearly jumped on by dozens of kids (and adults) of all ages, mostly from these large groups of people traipsing out here from wherever they live.

Yes, I am aware local kids jump off these cliff edges into the pool too. However, they usually show small amounts of consideration for other pool users. These kids (and adults) however, who were often jumping within a few feet of other pool users, couldn’t have cared less about anyone else, let alone possibly jumping on some poor swimmer’s head and most likely causing them a lifelong spinal or head injury. Then when the cliff jump was overpopulated with a line of jumpers, they then migrated to climbing the fenced area near the seats and a young girl jumped almost on top of me, my daughter and my friend. I had to tell her and her friends off. They didn’t seem to like that; maybe I should have been more diplomatic?

Nevertheless, others in the pool backed me up and told them off too. Lifeguards soon were in the vicinity and I told them to tell them all to stop, which they did. I’m sure they got back to it a few minutes later though.

Anyone is welcome at these beaches, they are not anyone’s to own. However, if you are going to come here to act like you own it and do whatever you want, while putting others in danger and generally being a nuisance, then sod off and go somewhere else. Maybe I could suggest a pool with a diving board or a more appropriate place to jump off ledges into water? On hot days and in general, lifeguards should patrol and monitor the pool and rockpool area to deter cliff jumpers. They should give any jumpers a stern talking to about the dangers and general inconsiderate nature of their actions. Either that or electrify the already unsightly barbed wire fence. Maybe that will sort them out. Only time will tell.

Not Hitting The Spot

I was wondering what is happening with the newsgency at The Spot in Randwick. The shop is open irregular hours (if it’s open at all) and they don’t have newspapers, lotto or magazines. I’ve never

heard of a newsagency that doesn’t have newspapers! The guy behind the counter just sits there in the dark. It’s basicallly just a lollipop shop - useless!

Vale Skipper

Dear Beast - This section is often filled with complaints, strife and derision, which is to be expected - there’s reason enough for much of it, no doubt. But I would like to post a brief recognition where the opposite applies.

Earlier this month we lost our beloved Skipper, a gallant and loyal family dog whose ‘hood was the Varna Park-Cloey-Iggys patch. He was well known by many, considered handsome by most and befriended by all.

When terminal illness arrived, Bronte Road vet Dr Josie Gollan could not have managed the situation with greater situational awareness, professionalism and sincere sensitivity. This is the stuff they don’t show in those cute RSPCA ads, and it is every bit as important.

So, thanks to Josie and her Animal Doctors team for the fitting farewell for the most faithful of friends.

The Greene/MacDonald Family Clovelly

Labor's Submarines

Dear Editor - Over the last 12 years we have been able to follow the incessant endless ongoing repeated complaining about the Liberal Party’s Submarines (originally Kevin Rudd’s idea) that would cost $90 billion, which could have been so much better used in education or healthcare according to Mr Klikauer.

I’m not sure we’ll hear much about this from now on I guess (even though Labor wants to spend even more than that!) because it seems quite obvious that federal Labor can’t misstep... Watch the silence about this subject!

Maroubra

Please send your feedback to letters@thebeast.com.au and include your name and suburb. We try and publish as many as possible, but nothing too crazy please.

18 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Monthly Mailbag

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19 Issue 220 May 2023 The Beast
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20 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220 Got the music in you?
MAY – 11 AUG
8

WELCOME TO TERM 2

AT ST CATHERINE’S SCHOOL SYDNEY

KEY EVENTS FOR TERM 2:

- A Chorus Line: 4-6 May 2023

- Open Morning: 18 May 2023

- P&F Trivia: 20 May 2023

- Band Showcase: 6 June 2023

- String Showcase: 20 June 2023

- RAW Dance Showcase: 22 June 2023

Should you wish to contact the school or join our email distribution list, please email us at stcaths@stcaths.nsw.edu.au. We can also be reached via phone on 02 8305 6200.

Scan

the QR code or visit our website to see our full list of events.
https://www.stcatherines.nsw.edu.au/

From the Desert to Boondi

From a room in Bondi Pavilion, the music of the desert is being broadcast across the Eastern Suburbs and beyond on Eastside Radio’s new weekly show, Boondi Nights.

Presenter Earl Weir has been showcasing the music of Arnhem Land acts like the Andrew Gurruwiwi Band, a seven-piece ensemble that plays desert funk, with vocals in the Yolngu Matha language. Plus the Wednesday night show features urban Koori music artists such as rappers Barkaa and Briggs.

In addition, you’ll hear long-established Indigenous music stalwarts like Warrumpi and the Black Arm Band. The latter act credits former conservative prime minister John Howard as the brainchild behind its name.

“Howard said Indigenous people like to be portrayed as victims wearing black arm bands,” Earl says.

While the focus of the 90 minute show is music, Earl also keeps his listeners in the loop about local First Nations events like the Blak Markets, held four

times a year at La Perouse.

Earl is a Bondi resident who has been carving out a profile as singer-songwriter with Eastern Beaches band Krystal Rivvers. By day, you’ll find him on a building site shifting dirt and rubble from the cabin of a giant excavator. He is very much a man of the earth.

The 32-year-old Boonwurrung-Wurundjeri man was approached by Eastside about hosting its first-ever Indigenous show after Krystal Rivvers headlined at the Pavilion reopening at the end of last year.

“I feel honoured to have been given the opportunity, and I’m doing my best to immerse the listeners in the numerous facets of Indigenous culture,” he says. Boondi Nights takes its name from the Dharug name for Australia’s most famous beach, Boondi.

“It means water crashing over rocks,” says Earl.

You can catch Earl’s show on Wednesday nights from 9.30pm-11pm, or download the Eastside app and listen to it any time.

Enjoy

a Visual Feast at Randwick Art Society’s Annual Exhibition

Randwick Art Society will be holding this year’s annual exhibition from Friday, May 5, to Sunday, May 7, at Little Bay’s Prince Henry Centre. Art lovers are invitied to come and marvel at the talents of local artists and hopefully consider purchasing a work or two.

More than 300 paintings will be on display this year. The exhibition is also showcasing the work of local photographers and craft makers.

The Beast had the pleasure of catching up with organisers and participants at the Randwick Literary Institute where the group meets every Monday morning and has a permanent gallery. Some were brandishing brushes and palettes as they put the finishing touches on their paintings. Many of the works depict beach and ocean scenes, like Sunrise Surfer by Ann Cahill, who will be next month’s featured artist in The Beast. There are also portraits, still life pictures and a number of surrealist works.

The exhibition runs from 10am to 8pm on the Friday, then 10am until 4pm on the Saturday and Sunday. As you soak up the visual feast, you’ll be serenaded by local guitarist John Kapodistrias and a ukulele group.

22 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220 Local News
The Randwick Art Society. Words Anthony Maguire Photo Selfie A man of many talents.
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SurfAid Cup to Raise Funds for Impoverished Surfing Communities

Words Anthony Maguire

Photo Bill Morris

Demand for labour is still at all-time highs.

Easing of Visa Restrictions to Help Businesses Attract and Retain Staff

Good news for local businesses struggling to find staff - the federal government has recently relaxed visa restrictions for non-Australian workers.

Before you say ‘Hey, that’s dudding Aussie workers out of jobs,’ it’s worth noting that many young Australians are reluctant to commit to jobs in hospitality, retail, building and a number of other sectors.

That has certainly been the experience of Bondi Migration agent Brendan Muldoon.

“It seems most of our kids don’t want to make beds, wait tables or work in construction and various other sectors,” he told The Beast.

When COVID came along, the bulk of the foreign-born labour pool had to say adios to Australia because jobs disappeared. That has left a void where numerous businesses in the Eastern Beaches face challenges finding staff post-COVID.

“At a lot of Eastern Suburbs restaurants, the owners are having to double as waiters and chefs,” said Brendan.

“I recently got married and

booked a pre-wedding dinner for all my mates, then at the last minute was told we’d only be able to have finger food because there were no kitchen staff.”

But now Canberra has created a number of new visa options which offer incentives for attracting and retaining staff. There’s the 408 Visa, which is a free 12-month working visa for anyone currently working and with a visa expiring before July. And for skilled workers, the 186 Visa opens the prospect of permanent residency to a much broader range of occupations, including café managers, web and graphic designers, marketing and public relations workers.

“Previously only highly-skilled workers could apply for permanent residency,” Mr Muldoon explained.

In addition, the 485 Visa is open to students who’ve completed a two-year diploma (previously bachelor’s degree), making it easier for people to remain in Australia after their studies.

For more information, please visit bondimigration.com.au.

Local residents interested in helping surfing communities in remote parts of Indonesia and the Solomon Islands are invited to get involved in the SurfAid Cup, taking place at Bondi Beach on Friday, May 26.

SurfAid assists vulnerable overseas surfing communities with healthcare, clean water and food. Now in its seventh year, the SurfAid Cup is run by Surfing NSW and this year’s fundraising target is $100,000.

To get involved, surfers can visit surfaidcupbondi.com.au to register their team of four fundraisers.

“The teams can be from local businesses, schools or even groups of friends,” explained spokesperson Claire Stafford.

On the day, the team size is raised to five with the addition of a professional surfer. Past notables who’ve lent their names to the event include Matt ‘Wilko’ Wilkinson and Joel Pilgrim. Participants then plunge into the surf for tag team heats, followed by an awards ceremony and refreshments at event sponsor Salty’s. Fishbowl, Cali Press and Bondi Brewing Co. are also supporting the event.

24 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220 Local News
Wilko (left) with 2021 fundraising champs, Team Goodman. Words Anthony Maguire Photo Sookie Stackhouse
25 May 2023 The Beast Medicine e Rd, ry? ndon

John Anders Ward's Memory Lives On

Class of 1971 Reunited at Randwick Girls High School

Many things have changed for pupils at Randwick Girls High in the past half century. Enforcement of dress codes, for example.

“The principal was very concerned about the length of skirts,” said Josephine Anderson, one of the Year 12 students from the Class of 1971 who recently got together for a reunion.

“We had to kneel down on the concrete and a ruler was used to measure the distance between the bottom of the skirt and concrete - it had to be no more than four inches.”

“Of course, we always used to hitch the skirts straight back up again!” recounted Jane Maloney, another former pupil attending the reunion at their alma mater.

In 1971, there were 72 pupils in the final class (in those days called Sixth Form), and two dozen made it to the reunion, some travelling from afar. Jane Maloney, for instance, came down from southern Queens-

land for the get-together. Others travelled from Victoria and Tasmania.

Nine of the women at the reunion still live in the Eastern Suburbs and former class captain Linda Zilber resides in Bondi. Linda told of how when they were First Formers, they were the first class to move into the then-brand new school.

“We walked in double file from the old school, which is now Randwick Public School,” she explained.

“For the next six months we were the only class here. The rest of the classes joined us six months later.”

The current principal of Randwick Girls High School, Lucy André (who, rest assured, does not kneel girls on the ground and measure how much thigh is exposed!), said she is happy to host more reunions.

“Whenever I get contacted, I do my best to make them happen,” she told The Beast.

“I love them, I think they bring so much to the school.”

The annual Forever Johnno Raffle and Auction will return to the Sports Bar at the Coogee Bay Hotel from 7pm on Friday, May 26 to raise important funds for sick children.

Organised by Mal Ward in memory of his son, John Anders Ward, the event raises vital funds for the Clancy Ward at Westmead Children’s Hospital. The Clancy Ward, where John received the majority of his treatment, cares for children with liver and kidney problems.

John was only 20 months old when he had his first liver transplant after being diagnosed with Alpha-1 antitrypsin deficiency, a genetic liver condition. He had a second transplant when he was eight, which sadly wasn’t successful, and he passed away on August 29, 2008.

Mr Ward started fundraising soon after John’s first diagnosis. Well over $250,000 has been raised so far, supplying extra beds that allow parents to sleep next to their children in the ward, an electrocardiography (ECG) machine, portable TVs, Xboxes and cupboards full of games and books.

To donate to Forever Johnno, please call Mal on 0414 293 396

26 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Words and Photo Anthony Maguire Back to their old stomping grounds. Photo James Hutton
Local News
Johnno and Mal Ward at Coogee.
27 Issue 220 May 2023 The Beast Scan to save our contact details! old plumber sick of your treating you like a drip? Discover what great service should be like with Eastern Suburbs’ most highly recommended plumbers call us on 9469 5577 Expert Eastern Suburbs property manager Jillian Wills has just joined the team at Wills Property, a boutique real estate agency based in Bondi Junction. Jillian has managed countless properties in the Eastern Suburbs over a 30-year career, formerly at Wills Brothers. "Once you've lived in the East you tend to stay in the East. It has everything you need and the locals are great to work with. It's a pleasure to continue doing the job I enjoy, in the area I call home, with family again!" - Jillian The Wills family have been working in property, offering personal client-based service in the Eastern Suburbs since 1934. PHONE 02 9387 1700 EMAIL jillian@willsproperty.com.au www.willsproperty.com.au Come along to your local Resident Precinct Meeting this May Mill Hill / Bondi Junction – Monday 1 May, 6.30 –8pm Bronte – Monday 15 May, 7 – 8.30pm Dover Heights – Monday 22 May, 7 – 9pm South Bondi / Tamarama – Wednesday 24 May, 7 –8.30pm Rose Bay – Monday 29 May, 7 – 9pm Queens Park – Wednesday 31 May, 7 – 8.30pm Precincts are committees of residents who meet regularly to discuss local matters or issues of concern in their neighbourhood. Waverley is split into 13 Precincts and meetings are open to any person living within the precinct boundaries. This May, the following meetings are on: Visit waverley.nsw.gov.au/precinct to find out location of the above meetings closer to the date. Not sure which Precinct you belong to? Visit waverley.nsw.gov.au/findyourprecinct Waverley Council proudly supports resident run Precinct Committees

Much More Than Your Average Run-of-the-Mill Running Club

It started in May last year when a few Coogee locals got together to start running regularly. Since then, the Coogee Run Club has grown into a community powerhouse with almost 400 members.

Coogee residents Hannah Gandevia and Tara Meakins, both in their mid-30s, founded the group to help achieve their own fitness goals.

“On the first run, there were just three of us,” Hannah told The Beast, “but then it took on a life of its own as we saw an opportunity to help others

reconnect with neighbours and invest in their health coming out of COVID lockdowns.”

The group now meets five times a week with five kilometre runs from Coogee Beach on Tuesdays and Thursdays, a speed session in Queens Park on Wednesdays, a Centennial Park run on Saturdays and a ten kilometre Malabar Headland run on Sundays. Once a month there’s a newbies jog where participants run 2.5 kilometres.

At the end of the runs, they hang out together refuelling with a takeaway meal from a local restaurant or café. Once a month they enjoy one or two beverages together at a licensed venue.

“It’s evolving into a social club with a bit of running on the side,” Tara said.

“A lot of our members are from the UK and Ireland and new to the area, so they love the opportunity to join a ready-made social group with plenty of physical and mental health benefits.”

If you’re interested in joining the Coogee Run Club, you can head to the group’s website at coogeerunclub.com. You can also follow the club on Instagram, @thecoogeerunclub.

28 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220 Local News
Photo Jesse Simon
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Hannah (left) and Tara leading a group of runners at Coogee.

Friday 26 May

Coogee Beach

11am

Celebrate Australia’s oldest, continuous living culture on earth. Witness First Nations culture and history unfold in traditional and contemporary dance performances.

Join us in taking the next steps in our nation’s reconciliation journey.

1300 722 542 randwick.nsw.gov.au

KOOJAY
CORRO BOREE
FIND OUT MORE

Bits and Pieces

Marcellin College is celebrating its 100 year anniversary with a Cerise & Blue Centenary Ball to be held on Friday, May 5, at the Australian Turf Club. Tickets are $150 per head and include a three course meal with beer, wine and soft drinks. If you would like to attend, please visit trybooking.com/CFWGF. This is an event you won’t want to miss!

Randwick Mayor Dylan Parker has announced that a new native wildlife rescue shelter for WIRES East will be built in Randwick under a jointly funded program by Randwick Council and the NSW State Government.

the existing WIRES facility and will be built adjacent to its

current location within the sustainability education hub.

The project is made possible by a $400,000 grant under the NSW Government’s Metropoli-

This year’s program focuses on showcasing inspiring and eye-opening stories that highlight the experiences of the LGBTQIA+ community. For

target areas

30 Local News
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Crime News

Royal Randwick

Shopping Centre Thefts

Seen this bloke? Eastern Beaches Police want to talk to him about a crime spree at Royal Randwick Shopping Centre on the evening of Saturday, March 11.

Within the space of minutes, a man stole a tip jar and keys from Sushi Hero, then moved on to Soul Origin where he tried to take the cash till. That didn’t work out, so he went to nearby Chatime and used a knife to cut the leads from the cash register. He left the centre with the register under his arm.

Anyone with information is urged to call Crime Stoppers on 1800 333 000 or Maroubra Police on 9349 9299.

Woman Charged With Stabbing

A 37-year-old South Coogee woman has been accused of stabbing a male acquaintance in the back with a pair of scissors. Raquel Ohata appeared in Waverley Court charged with wounding with intent to cause grievous bodily harm. She was refused bail after the court heard the assault was so serious that the victim suffered a collapsed lung.

Historic Dover Heights Murder

An inquest into the 1980s death of a small-time crook has found he was murdered in Dover Heights by a notorious figure much higher up the criminal food chain.

Coroner Teresa O’Sullivan said model-turned-cocaine dealer Mark Johnston was killed by Arthur ‘Neddy’ Smith, a gangster who died from natural causes in Long Bay Jail two years ago. The murder took place inside the Dover Heights home of bent solicitor Val Bellamy, who has also since passed away after serving a stint behind bars for fraud.

Johnston, 36, of Rose Bay, was last seen with friends at a pub in Paddington on the night of September 1, 1986. He then went to Bellamy’s house to collect $60,000 the lawyer was holding for him. His remains were uncovered in recent times at Kurnell, one of the dumping grounds used by Neddy Smith to dispose of murder victims.

Man Tried to Sexually Assault Woman in Street - Police

A 35-year-old Randwick man is accused of approaching a young woman in a Bondi street and trying to sexually assault her.

The attack is said to have taken place in the early hours of the morning as the victim was walking down Mitchell Street. Police say Archie Anastasopoulos was cruising the area in a rental car when he got out of the vehicle and grabbed the woman. She managed to break free and Anastasopoulos got back in the car and drove off. He was arrested the next day in a traffic stop at Kensington. He has been charged with several offences including stalking, attempted sexual assault and indecent exposure.

Victim Wins Compo for Bar Attack

A man who was viciously assaulted in a Bondi Beach bar-restaurant has won a compensation claim against the owners of the business and its security firm.

Bodybuilder and influencer Clinton Chadwick was hit over the head with a bar stool by another drinker in The Bucket List, which used to operate out of Bondi Pavilion before closing

down during COVID. He was knocked unconscious and needed 15 stitches to his head. His statement of claim before the Supreme Court said he was left with lingering health issues.

Justice Michael Elkaim said there had been a breach of duty by The Bucket List’s owners, Bondi Beach Foods, and its security firm, Crossguard Group. He ordered them to pay Mr Chadwick $200,700 for his injuries and lost earnings.

Tradie Acted Like a Real Tool in Pub

Maroubra tradie Matteo Grassi turned violent during a drinking session at the Robin Hood Hotel in Charing Cross, a court was told.

A pub employee saw him getting aggro with other drinkers and suggested he leave the premises. Grassi responded by pushing the employee, then kicking a table. The pub staffer, a Responsible Service of Alcohol (RSA) officer, tackled him and the pair wrestled on the floor before Grassi took the hint and went outside. There he further vented his aggression by kicking the pub’s exterior walls and a sign.

The 25-year-old was arrested by Eastern Suburbs Police and faced justice in Downing Centre Court, where he admitted charges of assault and refusing to leave licensed premises. He will be sentenced in October after another assault charge against him is heard.

Bin Chicken Man Felt Threatened Maroubra man Tom Quach

felt threatened by the ibis he encountered while out and about in north-west Sydney. So he grabbed the bird, tied a rope around its feet and neck, then started shoving it into a shopping trolley. Members of the public intervened and Quach ended up in court charged with animal cruelty. The court heard the animal was bleeding before flying to safety. The case was adjourned pending mental health reports.

32 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Words Gary Larson Photo Rob Bery
Crime News
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Farewells with Feeling
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Subject Purple Skies Location Bondi

Photographer Josh Miller@gdayfromla

Subject Catch the Rainbow Location Coogee

Photographer Alan Wang

Subject Quick Puff Location Maroubra

Photographer Aurea Ayalon

Subject Surveillance Location Bronte

Photographer Axel Stapleton @inci_drones

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Please send them to photos@thebeast.com.au
Subject Happy Seagulls Location Clovelly Photographer Steve Peach Subject Wily Wylie's Location Coogee Photographer Carmel Denniss Subject Dot Painting Location Clovelly Photographer Mike McWilliam Subject Juggling Location Coogee Photographer Theresia Hall @theresia.g.hall Subject Morning with Friends Location Randwick Photographer Pavel Lipovsky

The Unreliable Guide To...

Free Alcohol!

Ha! I thought that would get your attention. But what The Unreliable Guide has been thinking about this month is the rising popularity of alcohol-free drinks - proper grown-up drinks like beer, wine and gin - without the alcohol that was originally the whole point. Is it a fad? Are people going mad?

As a Pom with wild Viking and Celtic ancestry, The Unreliable Guide is very fond of getting pissed. But every now and then I think it’s only fair to give the old liver a holiday. Water is great, in its place, but it can get a bit boring after a while and the thought of drinking nothing but milk, cola or lemonade for a month or two frankly depresses. So, inspired by entire sections of alcohol-free beverages in my local bottle shop, I’ve been experimenting. If you too would

like a break from the booze but worry you’ll feel like a social pariah, never fear, The Unreliable Guide is here with some tips and tricks on how to get the best alcohol-free buzz.

Cocktail-Mocktail

The Unreliable Guide isn’t a fan of most cocktails (with a few delicious exceptions: Margarita, Sidecar, Espresso martini) because they are sweet, creamy nightmares, custom-designed to give you the worst hangover in the universe. But if you are a fan of these concoctions, then you are in luck. There’s now a huge range of alcohol-free spirits that mimic gin, whisky, vodka, rum and even tequila, so you can sip away without worrying about how you’ll feel the next day (if you find one that makes a boss martini, let me know).

Whine Time

The one drink I’m yet to find successfully produced without alcohol is red wine. And believe me, I’ve tried. Some of these excuses for shiraz are up to ten per cent sugar, and they taste like it. Vile. I’ve come to the conclusion that the core flavour of red wine is actually alcohol, and without that... it’s Ribena. And not in a good way. Please write in and correct me if you’ve found a good red wine, I’ll be forever grateful. White wine seems more forgiving of having its alcohol removed, probably because it’s often sweeter anyway. Having said that, I still haven’t found one I’d drink by preference. Which leaves sparkling wine. And here, to my joy, there are several Prosecco-type drinks that are often more delicious than some of the alcoholic offerings. Brown Brothers in particular do a cracker, Banrock Station has a tasty offering, but there are dozens to choose from. My advice if you like a dry sparkle is to check the sugar content before you buy. Anything under 2.5 per cent and you’re in.

Beer is Best

The surprising winner of my alcohol-free experiments is beer! There are so many great ones now. And because lots of beers are made with hops you still get a nice relaxing feeling after drinking one. There are plenty of brands to choose from, but I can’t get past the Heaps Normal range. They have a beer for every occasion and they are so good I’ve fooled people into thinking they are actually drinking booze.

Finally, The Unreliable Guide suggests next time you are the desi driver or are feeling in need of a bit of a detox, you forget all those ghastly kids’ drinks and explore some of these tasty new offerings. Your liver will thank you.

36 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Words Nat Shepherd Photo Maggie Beer
as beer. The Unreliable Guide
Nearly as good

Waverley Council Update

Mayor's Message

Anzac Day

Waverley Council and the Bondi Junction RSL sub-branch invite you to attend our Anzac Day service on Tuesday 25 April at 7.45am at Waverley Cenotaph, Waverley Park. Please join us as we pay our respects to the servicemen and women who have helped defend our freedoms so that we c an live in a free and democratic society.

Mark and Evette Moran Nib Literary Award

Waverley Council is delighted to announce that the prize money for the Mark and Evette Moran Nib Literary Award has doubled to $40,000 thanks to an ongoing multiyear commitment by the award’s principal sponsors, Sydney philanthropists, Mark and Evette Moran, founders of the Mark Moran Group. The expansion of the major prize highlights the Nib Award, now in its 22nd year, as one of the most prestigious and valuable literary awards in the country, having distributed more than $500,000 directly to authors including previous winners Tim Low, Helen Garner, Gideon Haigh, Clare Wright and Delia Falconer. The Nib Award celebrates excellence in research and writing

and is presented annually by Waverley Council It is judged on high literary merit, quality of research, readability and value to the community and is the only major literary award of its kind in Australia presented by a local government authority The Morans’ ongoing support has taken the Nib Award to a whole new level and presented lifechanging oppor tunities for winning authors. In the spirit of supporting and encouraging Australian writers, the Council has also increased the People’s Choice Prize to $4,000 and will be offering six shortlist prizes of $1,500 each. Nominations are now open for the 2023 Nib Award for written works first published between 1 July 2022 – 30 June 2023 For nominations and further details, visit waverley.nsw.gov.au/nib.

Global Table

Global Table, our annual celebration of food, culture and entertainment from around the world, returns to Oxford Street Mall, Bondi Junction on Sunday 7 May from 11am to 4pm with our famous communal dining table, music on the main stage and cuisine from Spain, France, Ethiopia, Turkey and more. Be sure to bring your friends, family and neighbours and help celebrate Waverley’s diverse culture. See the What’s On page on our website for details.

Swap and Wash

Waverley Council is trialing a new Swap and Wash reusable food

Ph: 9083 8000 | waverley.nsw.gov.au

Stay in touch: waverley.nsw.gov.au/subscribe

container program in Bondi to help reduce plastic pollution and protect its beaches and the environment. Customers can now order takeaway food in specially designed reusable mealboxes at seven participating food vendors. Once customers have purchased the mealbox they then swap the containers for hygienically cleaned ones when they next order a takeaway meal. The mealboxes are made from certified ocean bound pla stic by Bondi start-up and certified B-Corporation, rePlated and manufactured on Sydney’s Northern Beaches The program has the potential to save 437 kilograms of plastic waste and avoid four tonnes of greenhouse gas emissions. Participating businesses included Porch & Parlour, Bronte Surf Life Saving Club Kiosk, Orchard St., Funky Pies, SHUK Bakery, SHUK Falafel, SHUK North Bondi, The Shop & Wine Bar, Harry’s Bondi, Cali Press, The Nine, The Depot, Makuto, Bare Naked Bowls Bondi and bRu Coffee. The 12-week trial is supported by NSW Environment Protection Authority, Waste Less Recycle More initiative. For details, visit

https://hellobondi.com.au/ecotourism/eco-business/.

Welcome Centre

A reminder that the Bondi Pavilion Welcome Centre is open 10am to 4pm, seven days a week for all your Waverley Council customer service needs.

Follow us

No One Drowns in Winter

Homo sapiens are truly remarkable creatures. The most intelligent and advanced species on planet earth has ruled its domain for thousands and thousands of years, and is capable of remarkable feats of adaptation.

There is no more astonishing example of this ability to adapt than that which distinguishes the inhabitants of the delightful coastal hamlet of Clovelly in Sydney’s Eastern Suburbs, on the vast southern continent of Terra Australis.

For it is here that certain human beings have evolved in such a way as to avoid drowning between the months of May and September.

Clovelianos are as susceptible to drowning as any human being who enters the inviting waters of their beloved bay during the remaining months of the year, but are miraculously immune to drowning as soon as the calendar lands on May 1.

The world’s leading scientists, naturalists and marine experts remain baffled by this recently-discovered phenomenon, and have so far uncovered only one significant clue. When the mighty Southern Ocean unleashes its frigid fury on Australia’s eastern coastline, scientists have observed the absence of Salvavida Cloveliana, a human sub-species known locally as Lifeguards.

Identifiable by their unusually toned and tanned hide, their aqua blue plumage and propensity to strut ostentatiously in the presence of the opposite sex, Salvavida Cloveliana are inexplicably absent between May and September. This fact alone has convinced international experts that Clovelianos have adapted to avoid drowning regardless of conditions inside the bay during the southern hemisphere winter.

The automatic ability to transform in the absence of Salvavida Cloveliana has prompted myriad scientific hypotheses. One school of experts is convinced that Clovelianos are innately more resilient than others of their kind, while an opposing school proposes that the inhabitants who brave the icy waters somehow adopt features of the Achoerodus viridis, or Clovelly blue groper, as soon as water temperatures drop.

Further theories ponder whether neighbouring species remain buoyant through the use of specialised planks and a neoprene skin, while some evolutionary experts have even suggested that Clovelianos subconsciously add blubber to avoid drowning, and begin this gradual process as early as the preceding Christmas Day.

So unique is the Cloveliano, that just a few kilometres north and south of the bay, this rare species is nowhere to be found. For on the shores of Coogee and Bronte, Salvavida Coogeiana and Salvavida Brontecita are a constant presence in their elevated nests. During painstaking studies amid the wintery wind and rain, scientists have also noted the year-long presence of Salvavida Bondina and Brassiera on surrounding beaches, and cite this as further proof that it is only the Cloveliano that has developed the ability to avoid drowning during the winter months.

38 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Satire Kieran Blake, kieranblakewriter.org Photo Thurman Merman Kieran's Satire
Salvavida Cloveliana.

The latest from Randwick City Council about living in this great city

Randwick News

As the nights get cooler and the crowds thin out at the beaches, there’s still plenty to do in our great City. I hope you’ll join us in Coogee on Friday 26 May for the Koojay Corroboree. A huge shout out to the kids of La Perouse Public School who worked with our much-loved local Aboriginal artist, Jordan Ardler, to create the amazing artwork that’s being used to promote the event. If you haven’t seen it check out the street banners, which will be flying across our City.

Council’s 2023-24 draft Operational Plan and Budget will be on public exhibition from Monday 1 May for four weeks. This outlines exactly what’s in the plans for the coming financial year. Some highlights include:

• $49.5 million dollar capital works budget

• 3km of new footpaths

• 4.6km of upgraded roads

• 4 new playgrounds

• A new BMX pump track

• 5,000 new native plantings

It’s a comprehensive document and one I hope you’ll have a chance to look at. Use this QR code to be taken directly to it so you can read and commentit’ll be live from May 1 – May 29.

I appreciate your input and look forward to hearing from you.

What’s On

TUESDAY 2 MAY

LIBRARY AFTER DARK: TABLETOP GAMES

6 – 9pm

Margaret Martin Library

WEDNESDAY 3 MAY

SPARK IN THE PARK

10:30 – 11:30am

Randwick Community Centre

SUNDAY 7 MAY

RUNSWIM COOGEE

AQUATHLON

7:30 – 10:30am

Coogee Beach

SATURDAY 20-SUNDAY 21 MAY

SUE LIU AT THE BAYVIEW

10am – 3pm

The Bayview Gallery, La Perouse Museum

SUNDAY 28 MAY

SYDNEY WRITER’S FESTIVAL JONATHAN SEIDLER IN CONVERSATION

1 – 2:30pm

Margaret Martin Library

UNTIL FRIDAY 26 MAY

UKULELE FOUR WEEK COURSE FOR BEGINNERS

10:30am – 12pm

Lionel Bowen Library

1300 722 542 randwick.nsw.gov.au

Councillor Dylan Parker Mayor of Randwick Randwick Mayor Dylan Parker

Open Your Ears

Recently I came across a news story that caught my attention. Netflix revealed that up to 40 per cent of its users regularly turn on the subtitles. You might be forgiven for thinking that Netflix viewers are turning subtitles on because they are a little hard of hearing or they are watching a foreign film. Indeed you might be right, but 40 per cent is a large number and it tells me that people, regardless of how good their hearing may or may not be, simply can not understand what is being said.

Try this simple experiment... Watch something on TV that you haven’t seen before. Make sure that whatever you choose has its narrative driven by dialogue - a movie, documentary or even the news, just not sport. Now, simply hit the mute button and see how long it takes before you start to lose interest. If you last more than three minutes you’re doing pretty well. Most people will find that if they can’t hear or understand what’s being said they simply zone out or switch off regardless of how good the visual is. Incidentally, the same experiment can be done in reverse, in a noisy bar or restaurant, or anywhere that involves needing to hear what’s being said in order to follow the meaning of a conversation.

The reality is that understanding something through listening vastly outweighs our ability to understand something through seeing it. This fact might be hard to digest when we think of sayings like, “A picture is worth a thousand words,” but I can absolutely guarantee that if you listened to those thousand words about the picture in question you will have a much greater understanding of its meaning than by just looking at it. To give some weight to this, as much as I have trouble watching Tom Hanks, look at the scene in the movie The Da Vinci Code where he is explaining to his co-star the symbolism and meaning in the painting of the Mona Lisa

Further, it might be interesting to know what we actually do with our communication time to extract meaning. Perhaps unknowingly, a whopping 55 per cent is spent listening; reading, writing or watching something comes in at a combined 28 percent; and speaking sits at only 17 per cent. By listening to what is being said and getting the intonation and tone of how it is said, we simply digest more meaning. Text messages can be misconstrued, emails glossed over, photos glanced at... all of them visual media that can leave themselves open to misinterpretation.

With this in mind, there is a big difference between hearing and listening. We might have heard what someone said, but were we actually listening? It’s a common problem that plagues interpersonal relationships. To actually focus on listening to what someone says, rather than hearing them while impatiently waiting until you can speak again, removes a huge barrier to understanding. Hearing is a physiological phenomenon, listening leads to understanding and helps assign meaning to what you’re in fact hearing.

In all fairness, research does show that the brain will automatically process a visual stimulation before an auditory one, and that sound in general is more of a subliminal experience, but if you were to close your eyes and just listen, what you start to hear will have more meaning. Try listening rather than just hearing in your next conversation. Try it with nature, music or even in a space that at first seems silent. You will be surprised!

If you ever get accused of ‘selective hearing’, take comfort in knowing there’s biological rationale for this. Despite the often-negative connotation, selective hearing can have a positive outcome. A parent can often isolate their own child yelling out ‛Dad’ or ‘Mum’ in a crowd, a screeching tyre alerts you to danger, and hearing the garbage truck from 300 metres away reminds us we haven’t put out the garbage. Again it’s a subliminal process, often automatic but highly useful.

Now allow me to go back to Netflix and the subtitles. After digging a little deeper I also discovered that young people are four times more likely than older viewers to watch TV that actually contains subtitles, mostly shows that fall within the ‘reality’ genre where contestants may be whispering or conversation that microphones struggle to pick up. But whatever the genre or situation, seeing might be believing, but listening leads to understanding, and in my view that is everything.

40 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Words Jeremy Ireland Photo Liss Senup Headnoise
Big Brother is listening too. Jeremy Ireland is a local psychotherapist. Have you got a question? You can get in touch with Jeremy by calling 0400 420 042.

U p N e x t : U p N e x t :

L a d i e s D a y L a d i e s D a y

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R o u n d 6 v S y d n e y U n i R o u n d 6 v S y d n e y U n i

S a t u r d a y M a y 6 t h W o o l l a h r a O v a l

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2 9 t h v N o r t h s ( 2 9 t h v N o r t h s ( C o u n t r y D a y ) C o u n t r y D a y )

HEAD TO EASTSRUGBY.COM.AU FOR MORE INFO AND TICKETS FOLLOW US @EASTSRUGBY FOOTY, FRIENDS & FAMILY FUN EASTS RUGBY LADIES DAY As we approach the midd season, join us at Easts Club for the renowned Ladies Day as we take Students! By far one of t days out in Sydne Buy memberships tickets now www.eastsrugby.com.au R e m a i n i n g H o m e R e m a i n i n g H o m e G a m e s 2 0 2 3 : G a m e s 2 0 2 3 : Y Y v S y d n e y U n i v S y d n e y U n i ( L a d i e s D a y ) ( L a d i e s D a y ) h v T w o B l u e s h v T w o B l u e s E E h v S o u t h s ( h v S o u t h s ( J u n i o r ' s D a y ) J u n i o r ' s D a y ) 2 4 t h v W a r r i n g a h 2 4 t h v W a r r i n g a h J U L Y J U L Y 8 t h v M a n l y 8 t h v M a n l y 1 5 t h v R a n d w

Thank You… Now Let’s Get To Work

A huge thank you to our community that has supported me in being re-elected to be your local member for Coogee. I am humbled by the overwhelming support and I feel the weight of responsibility to deliver on what we have committed to. I am fully focused on putting our community here in the East above all else.

We have made a commitment to ensure we work to fix our public transport in our area, starting with bringing back direct buses through to the CBD and Circular Quay. We are also committed to establishing a taskforce to work through the key findings from the public transport upper house inquiry that we were able to commission last year.

We will work through the failures of privatisation, including bus driver shortages, and implement plans to ensure

we are attracting and retaining bus drivers to work in our area. After years of cuts to essential services, we will work to restore funding and the faith of the community in public health and education.

I will always fight for quality essential health services at our most important health institution, the Prince of Wales Hospital, located right in the middle of our electorate. Our team will also, as committed, start planning to identify a site for a new public high school east of the Sydney CBD.

We are currently working with our local councils to ensure that we can promptly deliver on our commitment to install 19 new electric vehicle chargers across the Eastern Suburbs. We know that these chargers are a practical way that we can support our local community in transitioning to

electric vehicles, and we can all play our part in achieving net zero and taking the electorate off the grid.

We will ensure our beautiful natural environment here in Coogee, and more broadly across the state, is placed at the centre of decision making. We all cherish the local character, heritage, flora and fauna that surrounds us here in the East, the best place in the world to live, work and enjoy recreation.

I am committed to ensuring that politics is done differently and that I continue to be accessible to our community. I will continue to engage with you; to hear from you and listen to your concerns regarding the things that matter to us.

I look forward to continuing to talk with everyone from around our local area and continuing to provide you with information, ideas and updates via this very column in The Beast. It’s a privilege to be able to reach out about the things that matter every month of the year!

I encourage you to sign up to our community newsletter that goes out once a week and lets you know where I’ll be holding my regular mobile offices and listening posts in accessible locations outside of office hours. The weekly newsletter also includes information about what’s on in the East and among our community so you can stay up to date with free events that are happening in our area, as well as keeping abreast of any changes and proposals from our councils, as well as our state and federal government.

If you or anyone you know ever needs support or help, please do not hesitate to contact me via my electorate office. I am honoured to be re-elected to serve you and I am here to help, no matter how big or small the problem.

42 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Photo The people's politician. Marjorie's Musings

The Pelagic Pilgrimage

Much like that tan you spent all holidays procuring, Sydney’s summer is now all but a distant memory as the seasons roll steadily on into winter. Although my bank account is enjoying the much needed relief from tri-weekly jerry can runs to the petrol station and surprise trips to the tackle store, I can’t help but miss the epic season of fishing we had in the harbour this past summer.

It is around the same time of year that Sydney’s beaches and bars are inundated by swarms of tourists that the underwater world experiences a somewhat similar phenomenon, a ‘pelagic pilgrimage’ of sorts. Much like the warm weather that allures tourists in the thousands, it is the warm water bearing Eastern Australian Current that is responsible for attracting these fish by jump-starting an ecological chain of events as it torrents down the coast during summer. The early season sees millions of baitfish flush into the harbour along with the warmer water which coaxes a smorgasbord of hungry pelagics in after them. Vast numbers of Watson’s leaping bonito, mack

tuna, frigate mackerel, Australian salmon, tailor, kingfish and Australian bonito patrol the harbour in a state of frenzy as they gorge on the baitfish banquet. On top of this list of fish species is another breed of creature that reaps perhaps the greatest benefits from this aquatic event - the fisherman (or fisherwoman, if you like). Slotting firmly into this class of creature myself, I had a fair crack at the harbour fishing despite spending the majority of summer searching for fish away from the city and its crowds.

For a period of over three months the fish were hard up on the surface, and I spent most of my sessions buzzing around the harbour in my tinny chasing the abundant bust-ups. I found that small metals fished at a fast-paced, constant retrieve were the most productive lures on the smaller pelagics like the bonnies, Watson’s, macks and frigates. A few stints of larger tailor came through the harbour throughout the season and small stickbaits, as well as larger soft plastics, proved their undoing. The kingfish however, despite nearly always

being among the bust-ups (or at least nearby), were very difficult to outsmart. On multiple occasions, packs of bigger kingfish would follow in a hooked bonito, intrigued by the commotion of the struggling fish, but very rarely was I able to actually convert the sighted king into a hook-up by throwing in a second lure. The majority of kings I did catch fell to ultra light 8lb leaders and smaller 3-5 inch plastics, which necessitated careful rod work, especially around structure.

A technique that is particularly useful and often neglected when fighting kings close to structure is easing the pressure right off the fish when hooked instead of manically pumping and winding. The fish seem to stay somewhat relaxed and you are then able to lead them out to safer waters before fighting them up to the boat. As always, fresh stripped squid was the most productive bait on the kings overall, leading to the most fish, and the biggest.

Despite enjoying a decent run on the kings myself, it was interesting to hear from local Sydney Harbour fishing guru Craig McGill from Fishabout Charters. He said that this summer was the worst season he has had on the kings in years. He also said that he had witnessed the most ‘sharkings’ (when a shark eats or partially eats a hooked fish) as well as shark captures in his time. Coming from someone who has such a depth of knowledge and experience on the harbour chasing these fish, I found it interesting and slightly worrying to hear, but nevertheless I was still able to get enough of a taste to satisfy my kingfishitis.

If you’ve made it this far, cheers for reading and tight lines. For those who didn’t make it this far, the fishing Gods will deal with you accordingly.

44 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Words and Photo Lewis Kennedy-Hunt
Fishing Report
Lewis with a beautifully marked Australian bonito on Sydney Harbour.

May 2023 Tide Chart

45 Issue 220 May 2023 The Beast Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Sunday
Numbers Bureau of Meteorology Tidal Centre 1 0500 1.54 1132 0.57 1751 1.44 2343 0.72 2 0545 1.56 1207 0.53 1826 1.54 3 0027 0.64 0626 1.58 1239 0.50 1900 1.64 4 0109 0.56 0705 1.58 1311 0.48 1933 1.74 5 0150 0.49 0746 1.56 1344 0.48 2008 1.83 6 • 0233 0.44 0830 1.53 1418 0.50 2047 1.89 7 0319 0.41 0916 1.48 1457 0.54 2129 1.93 8 0408 0.41 1007 1.43 1540 0.59 2214 1.92 9 0501 0.42 1100 1.37 1628 0.65 2304 1.89 10 0601 0.46 1200 1.32 1723 0.71 11 0000 1.83 0706 0.48 1306 1.29 1828 0.76 12 0104 1.77 0813 0.49 1418 1.31 1942 0.77 13 • 0215 1.72 0915 0.48 1527 1.38 2100 0.75 14 0326 1.70 1011 0.46 1626 1.48 2213 0.69 15 0429 1.69 1100 0.44 16 0526 1.66 1145 0.43 17 0017 0.54 0617 1.62 18 0111 0.48 0707 1.56 19 0200 0.44 0755 1.49 1342 0.52 2012 1.90 20 • 0247 0.43 0842 1.42 1418 0.58 2051 1.90 21 0331 0.45 0928 1.37 1455 0.64 2130 1.88 0015 1.62 0722 0.65 1326 1.23 1840 0.87 27 0108 1.56 0814 0.66 1426 1.26 1946 0.88 28 • 0208 1.51 0904 0.65 1524 1.31 2057 0.87 Moons New Moon First Quarter Full Moon Last Quarter Tide Chart Check out what's on at the Pav

Method

1. To make the wontons, place all ingredients in a large mixing bowl. Use clean hands to combine the mixture thoroughly and break up the pork mince.

2. Separate wonton wrappers and lay a few on a chopping board. Spoon a tablespoon of the mixture into the centre of the wrapper. Using a pastry brush, dip it into the water and brush the 4 edges of each wonton wrapper (don’t make it too wet, just a light brush to help seal the edges).

3. Fold the wonton wrapper in half diagonally and press the edges together. The wonton should be in a triangle shape. Repeat with remaining mixture. As you’re making them, place the wontons on a plate and cover with a tea towel so they don’t dry out.

Wonderful Wonton Soup

Words

Wonton soup is always appealing, especially at any sign of cold weather. Hot, flavoursome broth and silky pork wontons with all the aromatic condiments is just so satisfying. They are very simple to make and have much more flavour than the pre-packaged ones from the supermarket freezer. A little chopping and mixing - and an efficient production line - will have you serving up these bowls of goodness in no time.

Ingredients (serves 4)

Wontons

500 gm pork mince

2 spring onion, chopped

1 tbs finely grated ginger

1 tsp sesame oil

2 tbs soy sauce

24 wonton wrappers

½ cup water, for brushing the wonton wrappers

Broth

1 clove garlic, finely chopped

1 tbs fresh ginger, finely grated

1 spring onion, cut into 3 pieces

2 litres chicken bone broth (or chicken stock)

1 tsp sesame oil

2 tbs soy sauce

1½ bunches choy sum, end removed, chop stems and leaves into large pieces

To serve

1 small bunch of fresh coriander leaves, picked

1-2 spring onion, finely chopped

Sriracha chilli sauce

Drizzle of soy sauce

4. For the broth, heat a large pot on medium heat and add the chicken bone broth. To that, add the garlic, ginger, spring onion, sesame oil and soy sauce and bring to the boil.

5. Add the choy sum, followed by half of the wontons, and cook for 4-5 minutes. Remove the wontons with a serving spoon and drain onto a tea towel. Cook the remaining wontons and remove.

6. Transfer the wontons to serving bowls, ladle over the hot broth and choy sum and add the fresh coriander and spring onion. Serve with sriracha chilli and soy sauce.

Dana Sims is a Sydneybased food and prop stylist who has grown up in the Eastern Suburbs and loves to create delicious food for entertaining and family. She is inspired by the fresh produce we have access to in Sydney. For ideas, recipes and styling inspiration, check out her Instagram, @stone_and_twine.

46 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
Dana Sims Instagram @stone_and_twine
that time of year again.
It's
Dana's Recipe
Please email advertising@thebeast.com.au 1800 040 040 www.itsinsured.com.au Westblake Pty Ltd [CAR 124894] t/a it’s insured is a Broker Partner of Australian Broker Network Pty Ltd [AFSL 253131] it's insuredPRESTIGE HOME INSURANCE it's insured > Tired of searching for your new home? > Want an off market property? TRACEY IS A PROFESSIONAL NEGOTIATOR AND PROPERTY FINDER WWW.TCBA.COM.AU P: 0416 100 839 E: tracey@tcba.com.au LIVE WIRE ELECTRICAL Old wiring and small job specialist Local and reliable Lic.No.98124C Since 1980 Kevin Taylor 0408 772 759 ● Personal Injury ● Workers Compensation ● Insurance Claims ● Wills & Probate ● TPD & Super Claims ● Local Court Pleas ● Critical Illness and Loss of Income Claims Ph 02 9665 4846 JFK LEGAL MOBILE LEGAL SERVICE RAY’S LAWNMOWING & PROPERTY MAINTENANCE ○ LAWNMOWING ○ GARDEN MAINTENANCE ○ RUBBISH REMOVAL ○ PAINTING ○ PROPERTY MAINTENANCE GIVE RAY A CALL! PHONE: 0467 670 785 When: 023 When: Sunday 7 May 2023 Time : 10am to 1pm When: Sunday 7 May 2023 Time : 10am to 1pm Clovelly Seniors patchwork exhibition • Recycled box construction • Pre-loved children's books, toys and clothing • Face painting • Composting workshops • Native plants giveaway • Preserves and pickles • Yummy food stalls Clovelly Child Care Centre 10am to 1pm | Sunday, May 7, 2023 Clovelly Child Care Centre | 40 Arden Street, Clovelly

The Beast Supercross

ACROSS

1. Greeting card brand (8)

4. Rodent (3)

6. Melissa Higgins is known professionally as ... Higgins (5)

8. Street artist (6)

9. ABC chairperson, ... Buttrose (3)

10. Large bird of prey (5)

11. Unit of gross internal capacity (3)

14. Area or section (4)

16. Victorian gold rush town (7)

21. Particular segment of a market (5)

22. Cannabis fibre (4)

24. Secale cereale (3)

25. Dr Jekyll & Mr ... (4)

26. Footbed (6)

27. Erotic Brazilian dance (7)

Trivial Trivia

1. What radio host was banned for life from Channel 9?

2. In computing terms, what does the ‘U’ stand for in USB?

3. What is the call sign of the character portrayed by Val Kilmer in the Top Gun films?

4. What is the meat of a deer known as?

5. What was champion Australian surfer Bernard Farrelly’s nickname?

6. What is the collective noun for a group of pandas; a scurry, an embarrassment or a colony?

7. Who was the first Australian to play in the NBA?

DOWN

1. Shakespearean tragedy (6)

2. Layered Italian dish (7)

3. Capital of Morocco (5)

4. Richard Roxburgh stars in this Australian series (4)

5. Type of herb (5)

7. Give way to arguments or demands (5)

12. Reactive gas composed of three oxygen atoms (5)

13. Negative (2)

15. Paris Hilton’s sister (5)

17. Small quantity of liquor (3)

18. Middle Eastern country (6)

19. UN headquarters (6)

20. First name of NSW Premier (5)

23. Conceal (4)

25. Cooktop (3)

8. Which of the following has never been an Olympic sport; squash, tug of war or horse long jump?

9. What colour do you get if you mix red and blue?

10. Which Bondi street was formerly known as ‘Sewer Road’?

48 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
1 6 10 20 22 26 16 2 23 17 7 9 18 24 27 3 8 11 12 14 21 13 25 4 15 5 19
Beast Brainteasers
Gordons Bay's resident wobbegong. Words Lisa Anderson Photo Mike McWilliam

100 GECS

10,000

gecs

Label Dog Show Records

Reviewer @aldothewriter

Rating 

To paraphrase Alfred Pennyworth, some people just want to watch the world burn. I honestly can’t tell if 100 gecs are excellent or awful. There is certainly exceptional song craftsmanship here, so you can’t help but wonder how great they could be if they used their powers for good, not evil. Some of these tracks would undoubtedly go off at around 11pm on a dance floor, but in the cold light of day they’ll just remind you of all the dumb things you said and did afterwards and will send cold shivers of shame reverberating through your soul.

BEC STEVENS

Big Worry

Label Damaged Records

Reviewer @aldothewriter

Rating 

A friend sent me a track to listen to recently and, while I liked it, I responded, “These guys haven’t suffered enough.” It lacked that painful edge that differentiates great art from the run of the mill. I don’t know anything about Bec Stevens personally, but I can tell she has suffered enough. There is an intense honesty to her music and lyrics that sets her apart as one of the real ones. She also happens to have a big punk rock sound, in the vein of The Smith Street Band and Sly Withers, so there’s a big tick from me there too.

CITY AND COLOUR

The Love Still Held Me Near

Label Still Records

Reviewer @aldothewriter

Rating 

I am a huge fan of Dallas Green, the man behind City and Colour (and Alexisonfire), but geez he needs to lighten up a little. Emo’s not cool anymore, Dallas. We’re all into pretending we’re living mindfully and happily now, even if we’re not. Fake it ‘til you make it, Dallas! That said, The Love Still Held Me Near takes him back to his roots and is a bit of a guilty pleasure. I won’t be cracking out the black hair dye just yet, but it is a treat to get lost in his maudlin, yet dulcet tones once again.

49 Issue 220 May 2023 The Beast
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Star Signs

Visions Beardy from Hell

Cancer Jun 22-Jul 22

Unless you have rich parents who don’t value their own time, raising kids in Sydney is way more trouble than it’s worth.

Leo Jul 23-Aug 22

Go out and procure yourself a fresh new pair of trackies so you’ve got something to look forward to this winter.

Virgo Aug 23-Sep 23

Putting off rest and relaxation until you reach your destination is only a good strategy if you actually have a destination.

Libra Sep 24-Oct 23

Everyone has an annoying, irra tional friend who opposes The Voice; shame, isolate and ostra cise them as soon as possible.

Scorpio Oct 24-Nov 22

If you really want people to like you for who you are, then you’re best advised to avoid being

Sagittarius Nov 23-Dec 21

If your partner is feeling ill, it is imperative that you obey every request they make, or risk a life of eternal misery.

Capricorn Dec 22-Jan 20

You’re not going to make decent money unless you throw all your morals and values out the win

50 The Beast May 2023 Issue 220
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