Pregnancy and You Magazine Issue 3

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contents

REGULARS

NUTRITION

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Editor’s Note

60 Eating for Two?

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Your letters

FEATURE

10 Meet our Cover Girl 14 Shopping Guide 24 Ask an Expert 50 Ask a Mum

54 The Effects of Prolonged Labour 64 Breastfeeding Guide for Multiple Births

78 Little Packages

70 What You May be Concerned About

81 For Submissions

78 Gestational Diabetes

82 Health and Fitness

94 Feature Interview I experienced the blessings that accompany multiple births.

86 Shopping for Two


OUR TEAM EDITOR IN CHIEF Olufolawe Banigbe PROJECT MANAGER Folasade Olorunlogbon EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT Oluwaseun Adebayo SPECIALIST EDITOR Segun Oke

THIS PREGNANCY

FASHION EDITOR Funmi Durotoye

16 Birth Stories Real Mum Experiences

SALES & MARKETING Oladayo Ibrahim SALES & ADMIN Ojo Alubankudi PUBLIC RELATION EXECUTIVE Bisi Ogunleye COVER PICTURE Moussa Moussa PHOTOGRAPHER Ibukun Oluyemi FASHION PAGES House of Avan Havillah Circa 64 D’lune Bags Mon Ami CONTRIBUTORS Dr Adetoye Durodola Dr Adenike Bello Dr Omotayo Abiara Rev Mrs. Jumoke Adeyemi Mrs. Babafunke Fagbemi Dr Chineze Fadipe Nurse Josephine Idiaghe Dr Karen Joash ADVISORY BOARD Femi Atoyebi Adebola Atoyebi Wale Adedeji Wale Aderoju

Cosmofeminin

COSMO FEMININ COMPANY LTD 12 ABA JOHNSON STREET, ADENIYI JONES, IKEJA, LAGOS t: 01 730 5172 m: 0806 612 4019 0807 314 3663 0809 669 8799

e: admin pregnancyandyou.org w: www.pregnancyandyou.org

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE IS PUBLISHED QUATERLY BY COSMO FEMININ COMPANY LTD. Nothing in this magazine may be reproduced in whole or in part without the wri en permission of the publisher.

32 Pregnancy and your Career Balancing motherhood and your career. 56 Pregnant and Single Sailing solo to motherhood. BABY AND YOU 28 When a Mum Travels Travelling with your bundles of joy 66 A Different Ball Game Preparing for your multiple birth 74 Why Do I Still Look Pregnant? 76 How Caffeine Affects your Children 84 Dear Doctor FASHION & BEAUTY 36 Fashion Pages “Pregnant and Gorgeous” 48 Proper Use of Makeup in Pregnancy DAD’S CORNER 89 What to Pack For the Labour Room…’Dad’ 90 HIstory Hear it from the man’s perspective




editor’s le er

Welcome got a call from my friend like I normally do most mornings, but this particular morning as I was preparing to go to work, I noticed I did not hear anything from her end when I called out to her. After a split second pause from her I heard her heave a sigh and she said, “Pregnancy and You just saved my baby”. She then related how her daughter was choking on a bottled water cap and all she could remember was the procedure I had put her through about two weeks earlier, when we were just chatting and from nowhere I picked her daughter and told her, “My friend, here is what to do when a baby is choking”. She was rushing out for a meeting but I got her to listen to me carefully. She told me how she beat her baby’s back like I had described though under so much anxiety at the time she was earnestly trying to save her baby’s life. When the cap was out of her baby’s throat, she related how she continued to shake like the leaves of an aspen in a breeze. Imagine a 15 month old

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baby choking on a regular bottled water cap. How did she get it down her throat? When she related this incident to me, my eyes were filled with tears of gratitude and I felt priviledged that I was used to save a life. She said she also picked her laptop and sent a letter to our mail box for our next publication. (Star letter on your letters section; please read it.) As Nigeria’s premier pregnancy magazine, we feel most honored to fill such large vacuum and give the best to our readers and prospective readers. This summer and holiday season, we have discussed how to make life easy for a travelling mum in our article, ‘When a mum travels’. Also with the increasing statistics of the number of multiple births and keen interests of women in having them, we feel we should avail you of what it means to have twins, triplets or more as you so desire or would have eventually. I personally love the Pregnant but Single article, knowing for a fact that not all pregnant expectant mothers are married or have a partner, there is a special need that has to be addressed and they sure need more encouragement. We have more parenting articles and wow! the ‘HIStory’ (his story) section that talks about the ‘Pregnant Dad’. Enjoy this edition as we replace your anxieties through the bump time with thrills and excitement.

...and she said, “Pregnancy and You just saved my baby”

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contributors PASTOR JUMOKE MICHELLE ADEYEMI is a graduate of English from the University of Ilorin, she holds a masters degree in personnel psychology from the University of Ibadan. She is a Co-pastor, Global Harvest Church. Olatunji house Maryland, Lagos. She is a personnel psychologist, counselor and administrator. She hosts “Celebrate Recovery” a Christ centered programme that helps people deal with life hurts, hang –ups, habits and different kind of addiction. She is married to Rev Victor Adeyemi, and they are blessed with four lovely children. JOSEPHINE IDIAGHE is a Registered Nurse and Midwife. She qualified as a Registered Nurse in 1995; and as a Midwife in 1998. She is a first aid instructor in a marine school; and an ante-natal class instructor. She is married to Raymond Idiaghe and they are blessed with two children: Beryl and Ruby. DR. OMOTAYO ABIARA is a graduate of the College of Medicine, University of Ibadan. She is currently running her post graduate training at Lagos University Teaching Hospital (LUTH). She is a Member of the Association of Resident Doctors, LUTH Branch. She is a Registrar of Obstetrician and Gynecologist at LUTH. She is married to Pastor Isreal Abiara and they are blessed with three children. DR. F. ADENIKE BELLO is a graduate of University of Ibadan (MBBS). She is a Fellow of the National Postgraduate College of Nigeria (FMCOG); and also a Fellow of the West African College of Surgeons (FWACS). She is a lecturer at the College of Medicine, University of Ibadan and a Consultant Obstetrician & Gynecologist, to the University College Hospital, Ibadan. She is happily married and blessed with children. DR. AKINYEMI OLALEYE is a graduate of the College of medicine, University of Ibadan (1999). He is a Fellow of West Africa College of Surgeons (2008). He had his specialist training in IVF and ET in Abuja (2008). He is a registered obstetrician and gynecologist. His passion is to see a woman come in pains and go out happy and fulfilled. He has passion for medicine and medical care and also for success in everything he does. He is married to Dr. Atinuke; also a gynecologist and they are blessed with a set of twins: Temitope and Tolulope. BABAFUNKE FAGBEMI a graduate of University of Ibadan holds the Bachelor of Pharmacy (B. Pharm) degree; and a Masters of Communication Arts (M.C.A.) degree from the Communication and Language Arts Department of the same school. She is married to Dr. Fisayo Fagbemi and they are blessed with three wonderful children: Babafemi, Gbemisola and Gbeminiyi. She loves working with children and listening to music.

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If you have any views or comments about the magazine, please send it to us. We would like to know how this publica on has been useful and relevant to you. If you also have any issues or topics you would like to see covered, please send it to us. We’d love to hear from you. Email: yourle ers@pregnancyandyou.org

Your Letters I WAS NOT DISAPPOINTED After I read your previous edition, I was eager and waiting impatiently for the next edition and believe me, I was not disappointed. This edition of the Pregnancy and You magazine is so exciting; I have read it over three times and I am still reading it. I love all your articles especially the Dear Diary and Polish your diet. Now I see pregnancy from a different angle though I am still single and not a mother yet. You guys have prepared me for pregnancy and motherhood. Wow! I can’t wait for your next edition. Ehimen Sandra okhah (Lagos)

YOU GUYS ARE WONDERFUL I am a subscriber to the Pregnancy and You magazine and I just opened the package sent to me; you guys are wonderful. Thanks for the free gift too. The magazine has been my companion since my 24th week in pregnancy and I have no regrets whatsoever for subscribing to the magazine. Baby and I say thank you. Ayo Fadeyi (Ibadan) THIS MAGAZINE IS A SPECIAL SERVICE TO OUR COMMUNITY I have to commend this publication; it is a good Job. I have been literarily blessed by the last edition

of the Pregnancy and You magazine. It is like the daily devotional we use at home during our family worship. This magazine is a special service to our community; it is a ministry and it is definitely more than a magazine. My wife and I salute your courage and we are part of you. Opeyemi & Folasade Owolabi THUMBS UP Thumbs up to the whole pregnancy and you magazine crew. Pregnancy and You is an idea whose times have come. Good work. I wish you all the best. I am glad to see more parenting issues covered in the second edition. Shola-Adu Okubote

NOT ONLY FOCUSSED ON PREGNANCY ISSUES Kudos to all the team of the Pregnancy and You magazine. My husband bought me a copy of the magazine in the month of June and when I went through the magazine i found out that it deals with a lot of issues; it does not only center on pregnancy issues but also on how husbands can be of assistance to their wives during and after pregnancy and a whole lot more. After going through this present issue, i gave it to a colleague of mine who is pregnant and since then she has been asking me when the next issue will be out so that she can get her copy. We are really looking out for the next edition. Blessing (Lagos).

STAR LETTER “PREGNANCY AND YOU JUST SAVED MY BABY” I think I can say that Pregnancy and You saved my baby. A couple of weeks before the occurrence I had some time to spend with the editorin-chief. We got talking and she told me what to do when your baby is choking. I was in a hurry but she said, “Let me show you, you can’t say what will happen.” so I just said, “Okay let me see what you are talking about”. Then she took my baby girl and demonstrated exactly what to do when a baby is choking. About a week later I was at home getting ready for work with my baby in front of the mirror. I noticed she

had a bottled water cap in her hand but I thought that could never go down her throat so I allowed her play with it. While I was still getting ready I heard a choking noise, really loud almost like an adult. At that moment I told myself that this is not the time to pick up my phone to call someone or start reading a book to find out what to do. The only thing I remembered was what the editor-inchief has showed me. Then I picked up my baby and did exactly what I was told; I turned her over on my laps and I gave four consecutive forceful blows between my baby’s shoulder blades with the heel of my

hand. It was just as if she was not moving then I thought, “Oh! My God, I hope I got it right”. Then I turned her to check her but on turning her over I saw the bottle cap on the floor then I knew that it was out. I shivered so much, my whole body was shaking. I was so thankful to God and I’m grateful that I took that moment with the editor to see what to do in that kind of situation. I was so grateful; I looked at my baby in the eyes and was so thankful. The first person I called was the editorin-chief; I said to her, “Pregnancy and You just saved my baby”. Adeola Famurewa (Lagos).

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O A lab de is ba i yo


cover girl interview

he has been there before, in fact this second time around she had a cute baby girl just like her first. But she knows now beyond doubt that no two pregnancies are the same. Meet Olabisi Adebayo, a banker by profession who shares what it was like to be pregnant again. P&Y: How did you meet your husband and how has married life been? BA: We met at my work place through a friend of his that was my colleague. It has been great. I love my husband so much, he’s my life and everything. He loves me and I know that for sure. I have heard that marriage gets boring by the third or fourth year but that has not been my story in fact it is getting more exciting. I would marry my husband all over again. P&Y: Tell us about the experience since it is your second? BA: We wanted to have our second baby by the time our daughter was 3 years and that was what happened. My doctor had told me that pregnancy experiences are different; though they still make references to your past record in pregnancy, it is obvious it is never totally the same. This second time around, I felt a lot better than the first, I lost so much weight at the first and that was not the case with the second. I threw up only at the first trimester. At the end of the first trimester, I became strong and I resumed work. I was so ignorant during my first pregnancy, I didn’t know what to expect as the pregnancy advanced and to make matters worse I was not enthusiastic about knowing anything; I was just pregnant.

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This second is totally different because I prepared for it and I was psychologically ready. I knew what to expect at every stage. By the time I had my baby I was already due to have my baby, in fact a couple of days late. 30 minutes after midnight, I got up to use the bathroom and I started feeling funny. I was expecting my water to break but it did not. I alerted my husband and we prepared to go to the hospital but I decided to stay back bit so I won’t be sent back home. When I got to the hospital around 1.30am, I was 7cm gone. My husband and I were very happy and we hoped that in the next hour the baby will come.

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cover girl interview

YOU COULD BECOME A PREGNANCY AND YOU COVER GIRL! To be our cover girl: Email your details and pregnancy pictures to fashion@pregnancyandyou.org with the title: I want to be a model.

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cover girl interview

The nurses commented that I was doing great because I really did not show how much pain I was feeling. I just held my husband’s hand tight and believed God for safe delivery. I had my baby around 4.30. I was very tired and happy after I had her. I felt I had crossed a hurdle though I was a bit concerned when the memories of the first experience came back to me; I lost a lot blood after I had my first girl and I prayed it will not happen this time. P&Y: How was it balancing your career and pregnancy? BA: Where I work is a wonderful work environment and this is majorly because I have such great colleagues I

‘When I had my first child, I appreciated my mum be er. We got closer since then and now I understand motherhood and all she went through. ’

work with. It always felt good going to work. I was not lazy during pregnancy; I did my job like I would if I was not pregnant. Moving around during office hours was also a form of exercise. P&Y: Your husband? BA: He is a wonderful man; very loving and understanding. We are best of friends. I believe we kept our love going strong basically because we communicate a lot. We also do a lot of interesting things together. We both understand our love languages and we act it out. P&Y: Your mother? BA: When I had my first child, I appreciated my mum better. We got closer since then and now I understand motherhood and all she went through. My mother and my mother-in-law are so very supportive and prayerful. In fact I would say I have two mothers and when the three of us are at home together you will think my mum and my husband’s mum are sisters. P&Y: To an expectant mother? BA: Pregnancy is all about the joy of being a mother. I know what it is like to feel you are someone else in your own body when you get pregnant. Every expectant mother going through stuff should know that it is just for a while. Pregnancy is a roller coaster ride where you are up today and down tomorrow; it is part of the package that comes with the journey to motherhood but believe me; it is all worth it.

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shopping guide

For your Baby: TOILETRIES AND SUNDRIES • Disposable nappies • Wipes • Baby powder • Baby oil • Baby shampoo • Cotton buds • Baby manicure set • Baby soap • Baby thermometer • Feeding bottles • Sterilizing kit • Nappy cream • Bathing kit CLOTHING AND ACCESSORIES • Sleep suits • Body suits • Socks • Bootees • Dinner bibs • Fancy bibs • Shawl • Receiving blankets • A cot net. • Face cloths or towels • Baby hats NURSERY • Cot or pram • Infant carrier car seat • Changing mat • Chest of drawers

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Rattles and soft toys Foam mattress

For the mother: • • • • • •

Disposable panties Nursing bras Breast pads Breast pump Dressing gowns Front opening sleep shirts or dress

HOSPITAL BAG • Nursing bras • Breast pads • Slippers • Toiletries • Makeup bag • Tissues • Sanitary pads • Dressing gown • Front opening night shirts • Sleep suites • Body vests • Receiving blanket • Disposable nappies • Clothes to take baby • Clothes for you to wear home • Book or magazines • Camera or camcorder • Sterilized feeding bottle

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Mothers sharing their...

Birth Stories 16

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birth stories

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birth stories

MOTHER’S NAME: A nuke Ajayi BABY’S NAME: Olufolajimi Obatobi BIRTH DATE: 20th May BIRTH WEIGHT: 2.8 kg FIRST CHILD’S NAME: Obafemi PREPARATION The ante natal was interesting because I used a good hospital and started early. The classes were educative and interactive. I learnt so many things during the sessions. I could not eat anything until my first trimester was over and when I resumed eating I was on my usual diet. I ate like when I was not pregnant. Most of the meals I enjoyed and ate were taken with a lot of vegetables. I got a friend who travelled out of town to get me lovely baby stuffs and I got some here as well. When I shopped for my first baby, I got a lot of things I did not get to use, so this time I was more discreet. I also used things I had used for my previous child for my new baby; then I did not have to buy some items again.

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I read Pregnancy and You magazine and it was fantastic. I got it in the hospital that I use. I did not know anything about pregnancy until I got it and it was very educative. I read about Ectopic pregnancy and so much more. I also read the Supernatural Childbirth and it was very useful. PREGNANCY EXPERIENCE The first trimester was tough because it was different from what I experienced in my first pregnancy. The only thing I could do was sleep; I could not eat or work. Eating became very difficult for me and I was always throwing up. It was a challenging period for me. My baby went beyond the normal Expected Delivery Date (EDD).At 41 weeks, you are tired and all you ever wish for is to push that thing out no matter how and just get it over with. All I ever hear people ask me is, ‘Tinuke, are you still carrying this bump?” Trust me; it is always an embarrassing moment. My doctor told me to watch till the end of the first week after my EDD and see if my baby would come himself which is a better option for me. But if he would not then I would have to be scheduled for a C-section. I was really hoping that my baby would just come by himself. On the 19th of May, I was supposed to check in at hospital by evening so I could be monitored for the night and then perhaps induced in the morning. I was admitted and in the morning I was induced which was done around 6am and I had to wait till 9am because I was not contracting. As I said


birth stories

and had not gone through the experience of labour before. It felt really good having him around. I want to thank my husband for being a wonderful man. He is an understanding man and I appreciate him for that. He is a man that fears God and takes care of his family. I really love him.

I believe every woman who desires to be a mother should get prepared and equipped for the journey ahead earlier on, I had read some inspiring books and so I told God I wanted a miracle; I had been in labour before and I know how painful it could be so I really desired a quick and easy delivery. I prayed and kept believing in God. At about 9.20 am I started having serious contraction, the medical guys kept checking how far I had gone and it was painful. It got to a stage I was contracting every minute and I asked for the doctor so I could get an epidural but I was told it could not be done again. I just wanted the pain to go away. At a point I alerted the team

that I really feel it is time to have my baby now but I was told I had not dilated enough. Finally it was time to push out my baby but I was too tired. I was encouraged. I was in pain and asked God to help me and with the little strength I had I pushed and the baby came out at once. HUSBAND My husband was there throughout the process. He was very supportive and throughout the labour he was very quiet and was just holding my hand. When I had my first child he was not there

FIRST PREGNANCY At my first pregnancy, I knew nothing and did not prepare for what I got myself into at all and so it was not the best. The hospital I used had nurses and midwives that were very nasty and you had to call them ‘mummy’ before they attend to you. Also the hospital was not well equipped and they were not ready to answer my questions. I read books and journals for this pregnancy; also I used a specialist hospital which made a lot of difference. Also I knew I had to eat very well and eat right. Then I easily built confidence in my caregiver. That is very important. MOTHERHOOD Motherhood is a call to service. Waking up every day of your life and all you start to think about is your baby’s welfare right from the time they are conceived. It is a call to service for life which you answered to the day you got pregnant and you don’t have a choice other than get it right. I am forever thankful for the opportunity to be a mother. I believe every woman who desires to be a mother should get prepared and equipped for the journey ahead because it really is a journey that never ends but only has phases; once a mother, forever a mother. And they would always be your babies no matter how old or far away from you they are.

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birth stories

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birth stories

MUM’S NAME: Tina Ogumbor BABY’S NAME: Luke WEIGHT: 3.6kg BIRTHDAY: 4th January PREPARATION The first three months was really challenging. I had to cope with work and I had a toddler who depends solely on me. I was down for about a month. Because of the nature of my job, I had to manage the number times I would be off work so I had to be strong. I had a terrible cough which was treated by my doctor. I made sure I kept all my doctor appointments regardless of my tight schedule. I had enough stuff from my first pregnancy to prepare for my new baby’s arrival so I did

My baby was big so it took a while for the baby to come out and a er much urging and encouraging, I gave my last push very light shopping. I usually eat more during pregnancy and I take lots of fruits too. I know how important a healthy lifestyle contributes to my baby’s wellbeing so I was determined to do things right. BIRTH EXPERIENCE I had a totally different experience from the birth of my first baby. In my first pregnancy I did not feel much pains, I did not know I was in labor until I had this serious waist pain. In this experience however, I had seen traces of blood a week earlier and when I went to the hospital to be examined, the doctor said the

cervix was showing no signs of dilation so I went back home but he recommended I should come for daily checkups from then. On Saturday, I started feeling pains after I was examined by my doctor; I had very serious cramps. It was really painful but I was still sent home. Apparently, I had really considered leaving my husband out of this labour experience because he was really affected by my first experience; I was not sure I wanted go through all of that again. Sunday morning, I was no longer myself and so I was taken to the hospital. I was taken straight to the labour room when the medical crew noticed I was very restless. Though I was in serious pain, I kept

praying. At a point I started hitting the wall like I was going to pull it down. I felt like I needed to unleash the pain on something. The doctor encouraged me and told me I was doing well, that gave me a lot of hope. Later I alerted the doctor that I needed to use the bathroom. They knew the baby was about to be born so they rushed to assist. My baby was big so it took a while for the baby to come out and after much urging and encouraging, I gave my last push with so much effort and then I heard my baby cry. The switch from so much pain to sudden relief and so much joy is what I would never be able to explain at childbirth and that alone is a miracle and a mystery. I was anticipating having a girl but above that, all I wanted was a miracle. My husband was not around and before he came, I had the baby. When my aunt called to tell him I had delivered, I could perceive the excitement in his voice.

HUSBAND He’s a wonderful man and always there to assist. He knows how make me happy and he never stops thanking me for making him a proud father of two cute boys. He had told me once how happy and excited he feels when his son calls out for him. MOTHERHOOD Motherhood is a very interesting. It takes time though for the body to heal after being through such rigour. Motherhood is beyond every woman; you have to be endowed to be one effectively. The joy of having your kids around keeps you going.

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birth stories

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birth stories

want to take any pain killers because I thought I could cope with the pain of natural delivery. I was still trying to endure the pain but after about 3 hours with horrible pangs, I cried out for the epidural and once it was administered, I slept off for about 10 minutes and when I was examined, I was 9cm dilated. The doctors explained that I had been tensed as a result of the pain and that also affected the slow descent of my baby and hence the slow dilation. And because I was relaxed I dilated fast. Because of the epidural, I felt the pressure but did not feel the pain. When it was time to push, I had to imagine how it feels to exert pressure in order to push effectively to bring out my baby because I did not feel anything.

BABY'S NAME: Kayla Imisioluwa Lawson MUM'S NAME: Omotola Lawson BABY'S BIRTHDAY: 21st January BIRTH WEIGHT: 3.33kg PREPARATION It is my second pregnancy and I had been on IUD, a contraceptive, after the birth of my first child. We had planned how long I would be on the contraceptive before I start to try for another baby. I stopped using my contraceptive and was expectant. I tried to get pregnant

I thought I could cope with the pain of natural delivery...but a er about 3 hours I cried out for the epidural considering especially my fertile days but I did not conceive until 4 months after I was off the contraceptive. I usually do the shopping towards the last phase of my pregnancy. I felt I was radiant during this pregnancy period and quite energetic. I was strong enough to cook meals and do minimal chores around the house like arrange the wardrobe and take care of my first daughter, Modesireoluwa. In my last trimester too, I made a deliberate effort to take things easy to avoid going to the hospital.In all, I can say that my second pregnancy was much better than my first as I was strong enough to travel during the pregnancy. I couldn’t have done that with the first as I was always nauseous during the flights. I was not regular at ante- natal classes; you know second time mums always feel like we know the process, but I learnt

one thing that no two pregnancies are the same. I read more and so whenever I feel funny, I will call my doctor after trying to find out what I am experiencing from write ups and the internet. BIRTH EXPERIENCE Just as my first labour experience, my water did not break. When I was examined by the doctors on Tuesday 20th January, I was told I would be monitored till the next day when they would induce me in case the contractions are still too weak. For the two pregnancies, I would dilate till about 3cm without induction and then it would stop. So I checked into the hospital like I was going for a regular clinic visit. I was induced after a while and then immediately I started having serious pains. The pain came in quick successions and it simply refused to go. I screamed out for a pain reliever; epidural. I didn’t

HUSBAND I admire my husband throughout the delivery period, my husband was there in the labour room and he was too shocked to speak when he saw the baby’s head coming out. He was overwhelmed. He was very supportive and he very well understood why I was very cranky all through the labour. MOTHERHOOD Motherhood is demanding; it’s a stage where your needs or preferences don’t really count. You have destinies to nurture. You have a baby who can only communicate to you by crying and you will have to figure out why. In spite of this huge sacrifice it’s always rewarding whenever you look at your child or when she gives you a warm smile which makes all the stress worth it. It’s a gift to us as women. Having children is like you are fulfilling a call, it’s not like a job you get paid on and then spend the money. P&Y To share your birth stories, please send an email to birthstories@pregnancyandyou.org

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Ask an

Expert Q:

I had my first baby through a caesarean operation and I was told that I will never deliver vaginally because of my abnormal pelvis. I want to have six kids, is there a limit on the number of caesarean a woman can have? A: There is actually no absolute limit to the number of C-sections one may have. But each time your womb is cut open, that muscle

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becomes progressively weaker. This increases the chances of a potentially fatal rupture during a subsequent pregnancy. Not to mention the increased difficulty in performing the procedure successively and the attending risks. Most doctors

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advise a limit of 4 C-sections. Having said that, some women have successfully had more than that. I align with the 4 CSadvocates, but it’s your decision really, just make sure you keep your fingers crossed!

Q:

I became pregnant ten weeks after I delivered my first child. What effect will this have on my health on the baby I'm now carrying? A: Hm, that was cutting it kind of close. First of all, you’ll need to brace yourself for coping with pregnancy niggles (tiredness, nausea, vomiting—if you’re susceptible to such) and a demanding infant at the same time (who in spite of you will still need you to wake and feed him at night!).


ask an expert

About the real risks: there’s a (very) small risk of contractions during breastfeeding which may lead to a miscarriage; your body has not had time to replenish the stores that were depleted in the first pregnancy, so your risk of anaemia is higher. I recommend that you eat well, rest as much as you can and drink lots of fluid. You can breastfeed your older child as long as you want—right through the pregnancy and even breastfeed them both after his little sibling’s born (“tandem feeding”). I guess all three of you will be fine. If you’re not ready for a third baby immediately after your delivery, by the way, it will be a good idea to discuss family planning options with your health care professional!

Q:

Hi, I'm 27 yrs old. I'm 2 months pregnant and I have noticed some vaginal bleeding. Please, what are the symptoms of miscarriage? What kind of treatment is needed in such case? What is the cause of miscarriage?

is a means of natural selection of healthy babies. Do slow down, all the same, and best wishes!

Q:

I’ve been asthmatic since childhood. I’m concerned that the attack and the drugs I take for them might harm my baby?

Q:

Do I really need to have an Epidural or any kind of pain medication? A: No, you do not need to have any, but you might find that you really want it during labour. It is best to discuss available options of pain relief with your doctor (which also include simple things like breathing

‘You can breas eed your older child as long as you want—right through the pregnancy and even breas eed them both a er his li le sibling’s born’

A: Bleeding and cramps are both symptoms of miscarriage. Generally, bed rest, rehydration and drugs to relax the muscles of the wombs are given. Unfortunately, these do not always work, as most earlypregnancy miscarriages are due to defective embryos that are incompatible with life in the first place. So, one way to comfort oneself after such a miscarriage (howbeit cold comfort) is to remember that it

A: Thankfully, most of the drugs used for asthma are safe in pregnancy. Theoretically, asthmatic attacks should be fewer in pregnancy, because of the high hormonal levels at this time, most of which are steroids (which are useful in the treatment of asthma). But most times, this doesn’t translate practically. Be assured, however, that attacks can be safely treated in pregnancy.

Q:

exercises and having a labour companion rub your back), so you can decide ahead what you would use when necessary. Of course, many, many women deliver successfully without medication, but if you have the option—why not?

I thought breastfeeding was a form of birth control. Now I hear you can get pregnant while nursing, even before you see your period. A: Breastfeeding is a form of birth control; only not 100% efficient (like most other birth control options, anyway). It is

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ask an expert

applicable to you if you are breastfeeding exclusively and your monthly periods have not resumed, only up to 6 months after delivery. Even then, a 2% chance of getting pregnant remains. So, if getting pregnant so soon is totally unacceptable to you, I advise you look for another contraceptive option...

Q:

I had a miscarriage in the 5th month of my first pregnancy. The doctor said it was caused by an incompetent cervix. I just had a positive home pregnancy test and am worried that I will have the same problem again? A: An incompetent cervix is a common cause of mid-trimester pregnancy losses, and there are diagnostic criteria that I’m sure your doctor felt you met. I expect that he’d want to insert a stitch at the beginning of the 2nd trimester (after a scan’s shown the baby to be healthy) to keep your cervix closed until your baby’s mature enough to be delivered. He’ll probably tell you to avoid sex and may even decide to place you on bed rest for admission.

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No one can make you have an abor on against your will, but you need to be aware of the risks for you to know what you’re up against.

My doctor warned me not to get pregnant because I have coronary artery disease, but I got pregnant accidentally. I don’t want to abort and my husband wants to have the baby too. What can I do?

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A: Your doctor was worried that it may be difficult for your heart to cope with the extra work it has to do during pregnancy. No one can make you have an abortion against your will, but you need to be aware of the risks for you to know what you’re up against. First of all, a number of the drugs you might be using are not safe in pregnancy. Also, you are at increased risk of a heart attack or heart failure, more so during delivery. If you decide to continue with the pregnancy, see your doctor as soon as possible, he may need to modify your prescriptions. Also, you will need closer monitoring. A Caesarean delivery may be kindest on your heart; if you must have a vaginal delivery, you will probably be offered epidural anaesthesia (an injection in your spine, which will deaden you from waist

down so you are not stressed from the pain) and an assisted (with forceps or vacuum) delivery so you wouldn’t have to push so hard.

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Q:

Last week I took 2 tablets of Aspirin for a pounding headache, now I read it can cause bleeding in pregnancy. How far is it true? A: Bleeding will more likely happen with repeated or continuous aspirin use—and even then, more likely from your digestive system, rather than from your vagina. Sometimes low-dose (8-10 times lower than the dose you took!) aspirin is used to prevent recurrent miscarriages. It is generally not advisable to use aspirin in pregnancy, as this might cause a potentially fatal redirection in the blood flow of the unborn baby. Paracetamol is safer for pain relief; if the pain persists, consult your doctor. P&Y Please note: These ques ons have been answered by the team of our contributors who are medical professionals. However this does not mean you should not seek medical a en on as soon as you need to. This publica on is not designed to replace your need to see your doctor.



When a mum

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our trip out of town is in a couple of days, and you feel excited you will be seeing friends and family abroad, and then you felt that breath of fresh air. The routine of having to jump out of bed and get the kids ready for school and you getting ready for work is going to be on hold for about two weeks and you can’t wait. But there is one thing that you are definitely not looking forward to; the journey. You could not help but wonder what travelling has turned to for you since you got kids. You are the same cute lady who would dress to kill for the journey; you sway on heels and that lovely pink top over those

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white linen pants keep heads turn as you approach the desk to board the plane. Undoubtedly, it’s been nothing but joy and fulfillment since these bundles of joy arrived, one after the other; but you have not been able to figure out what to do so that travelling does not leave you so worn and spent; since all you do throughout the journey is run after an hyperactive 3 year old, who wants to run around the airport in 10mins. And then there is your 13 month old, who wants to eat and sleep at the same time. Of course your husband is there to help, but it makes little difference when the boy insists it is mummy who must take him to ‘pee’ and then little cutie wants to be rocked to sleep in

mummy’s arms. Yes, you explain why daddy is the one who will take him to pee and insists he goes with daddy, but you could really do without the tantrum that follows the verdict from the mum and dad jury. Trust me, I have been there many times, and I have learnt on the job. Here are a few tips (in no particular order) to consider when you are planning your trip, Bon voyage:

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Start making a list of items to pack for the trip as early as a week or two before. Make preparations for the bags you would use and get them ready. When booking your flight, put into consideration the best time your kids are less

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active or be likely to want to nap. Book flights that are likely to have fewer passengers on board. Make sure your kids are well fed and not too heavily dressed for the flight. Pack pullovers and sweaters in your hand luggage in case it gets too cold for them. Night flights are my best choice when I have options, that is. I feed them for the night, get them into light clothing and they could sleep all through the journey. Strollers and buggies are very useful, as it is very easy to move your infant or toddler around. Put their favourite snacks in the hand luggage and get ready to give it when they are restless. Avoid transit flights as much as possible; but when you don’t have a choice, night flights again

. . .

would be your best bet; else you would have to buy almost any colourful thing your boy sees at the duty free shop even if it is a shaving stick.

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Be conservative with your dressing. Wear comfortable shoes. Look good. Check in your luggage as early as possible, preferably before you all go to the airport. Then you could walk straight to the lounge to wait for your flight. Do not give stuffs like chocolate, soda, tea or coffee to your kids before or during the flight as they mostly contain caffeine and

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sugar; this will increase any child’s activity and restlessness. As a mother, you might be lucky to be allowed to jump queues, so take advantage of it and when you need to ask for the favour, ask politely. Travelling with your kids when they are not too well is not a good idea; perhaps they have a cold or flu. Get it treated and sorted out before you travel. It makes life easier for everybody. Make sure your childs’ immunizations are up to date. P&Y



this pregnancy

Pregnancy and Your Career he typical young lady in this present day and time is ambitious and full of dreams. With the daily mind feeds of becoming relevant and independent, the woman is not left out in this rat race. There is more pressure because the man’s income is no longer enough to keep things running in the family and there is a demand on the woman to bring something to the table. However, with the desire to start a family or add to it as the case may be, needless to say, the pressure she gets from the extended family to produce children, balancing pregnancy and her career becomes a

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this pregnancy

puzzle. This leaves the woman with nothing but concerns and apprehension about the future as she asks herself what happens to her career if she gets pregnant or finds out she is pregnant. When a couple is seriously considering having a baby, the major determining factor is the woman- the bump carrier. Your life is about to change forever, as your offsprings are going to be totally dependent on you. There are issues you will have to consider such as the nature of your job and pregnancy; how you would personally react to your body changes at any stage in pregnancy, and taking care of your child after delivery, when it is time to get back to work. The difficulty of being pregnant while holding down a fulltime job is that your life as a working person trudges on, but your body and mind may have a hard time keeping up. Taking care of your bundle of joy after delivery is also a major feat, for reasons such as breastfeeding and proper care of the baby when you are off to work.

Now that you are pregnant, out of a list of factors that is miles long, you will need to make certain adjustments and decisions that will make life much more easier while the bump increases and when it is going down; but one thing you are sure to realize is that you will need to make certain sacrifices as the time comes.

KEEP YOURSELF HEALTHY AT WORK 1. Combat morning sickness: Keep carbohydrate-rich snacks in your desk, such as crackers, popcorn and pretzels. 2. Don't skip meals: Eat at least three meals a day and make them as healthy as possible. Throughout the day, eat nutritious snacks like carrot or banana, to keep blood sugar levels stable. 3. Drink lots of water:

Staying well hydrated keeps your body's fluid volume up, nourishes your growing baby and helps maintain your energy level. 4. Get moving: Even moderate exercises can keep a host of pregnancy woes at bay. Get up and walk around once an hour or so; sitting or standing in the same position for a long time increases the possibility of blood clots, varicose veins and swelling. 5. Fight fatigue: Getting enough sleep is crucial. 10 or 11 hours a night is not unusual for pregnant women. Try to arrange a catnap at work, either on a sofa or with your feet slightly elevated on a suitable platform. 6. Hospital appointments: Regardless of the nature of your job, it is important to keep your regular checkups and be sure to ask the doctor any issues you need to clear. 7. Plan a timely departure: Try not to work right up until your due date. You need a little time to relax and unwind. Stress hormones can make labor more difficult. 8. Know the law: the law

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this pregnancy

permits a paid maternity leave for an expectant mother for up to 12 weeks; after which she resumes and closes early from work for the next 12 weeks as a nursing mother. 9. Put your desk in order: Organize your files, reports and other data that will be needed while you're away. Create a clearly labeled folder with contact information, file locations and other pertinent information. 10. Prepare for delivery: During the time you have taken off before the delivery, plan to the detail what you feel needs attention. Make out time with your partner to discuss what the arrival of this baby means to you and the family. As a working mother, you will not be able to stay at home with your baby for long. Here are some things you can do to prepare yourself and your baby.

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Decide early enough who you want to leave your baby with when you are off to work, and

your baby before you return to work; and put as a reminder just by your desk, the subsequent dates that your baby will need to see the doctor or go for immunisation.

start by bringing in the minder to get used to your baby before you start work. If you will be taking your baby to a care center, choose carefully and do frequent unannounced visits to see how the place is being run.

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.

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Start going out and leaving your baby for a couple of hours with the minder to see how they would fare before you get back home. Start expressing breast milk for the minder to give to your baby and let the baby; to see how much your baby will require before you are back from work. In case you are adding formula to your baby’s diet, you should start now so you can measure and try other options, in case your baby refuses the one you introduce to him or reacts to it. Make sure your baby’s routine visits to the doctor is up to date, and don’t miss any immunizations scheduled for

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TO GET BACK TO WORK MORE EASILY:

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Keep in touch with your colleagues by phone or by E-mail.

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Be aware of what is going on at your work place.

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You can make some short visits to the office before your official resumption date.

Even after work has commenced, there will be times your child will need your attention and you will realize that once you become a mother, your idea about you and your career will have to be rephrased; not in the context of your goals and dreams but how to achieve these goals. P&Y


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“Pregnant & Gorgeous” 36

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Baby Booming Beauty:

The Proper Use of

Makeup in Pregnancy By Eni Balogun t’s quite surprising that pregnancy changes a lot about your body, but many women simply don’t think their skin care and make up routines should change in pregnancy. Since the hormones that affect the body also change the complexion, you

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should consider a simple makeup regimen. A bit of makeup might help you feel better about your appearance, even if you only wear a bit of it. Remember that your makeup does not have to be elaborate, just a bit here and there to help you hide certain areas and enhance others.


fashion and beauty

Your make up routine should be something simple. In the first trimester, you’re likely to feel very tired and cranky. Having to roll out of bed for a fifteen-minute makeup routine is probably not your priority. If you’re used to wearing makeup, going out without it might leave you looking as green as you’re feeling inside, so try to bring it down to basics. Consider simply doing your eyes and lips, and then apply the powder sparingly. Blotchy skin or chloasma (the mask of pregnancy) can be modified with makeup. A nice foundation or concealer can help to hide the uneven tones and blotchiness. Remember not to use foundation over concealer as they tend to cancel one another out. If you’re experiencing acne or oily skin from pregnancy, you may want to switch tactics when it comes to make up. Consider looking for make up with oil control that is acne friendly, and that also promotes a healthier skin. If you find that your skin is dry, including your face, consider a nice moisturizer (like cataphil). To combine steps, you may want to try moisturizers, powders, and foundations that contain sunscreen. You can also find lip sticks and lip glosses that do double duty as well. Pregnancy is probably not the time to

jump off the deep end yet. Resist the urge to go for a totally different look. You have enough changes going on in your life and don’t need to figure out what you were thinking when you walked into the salon and requested for a Mohawk. When selecting makeup be sure that it is something that you can tolerate. Your skin may be more sensitive during pregnancy. You should also watch out for certain chemicals in makeup, because your skin absorbs chemicals from everything. So avoid products with harsh chemicals, including those with mercury. Mercury derivatives can cause birth defects.

When selec ng makeup be sure that it is something that you can tolerate. Your skin may be more sensi ve during pregnancy.

BEAUTY PRODUCTS TO AVOID DURING PREGNANCY 1. Phthalates: compounds used in plastic processing. They are also among the most common fragrance ingredients in cosmetics and lotions. 2. Hair treatments: Not much is known about the connection between hair dying and birth defects. It is probable that the chemicals used in dying, perming, and treating hair are absorbed into the scalp; just how much and whether or not they reach the fetus is undetermined. However, it seems smart to avoid them and the fumes associated with them. 3. Retinoids: are Vitamin A derivatives used in acne medications and anti-aging creams. Most pregnant women are well advised on the risks of Accutane (a retinoid called isotretinoin), which is used to treat serious acne. Taken orally, the use of this medicine has been associated with major birth defects and should not be taken while pregnant or within a month of becoming pregnant. 4. Salicylic Acid: in high doses, has been shown to cause birth defects. However, the small amounts we are exposed to in skin cleaners and lotions are generally considered safe. The bottom line is to avoid oral supplements. P&Y Eni Balogun is the Ceo.Lise Beauty Range Email: enibalo@lisebeautyrange.com

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Ask a Mom I am excited to present this section of the magazine to you which you have made possible. The following are a print out of the questions that

Question 1. Its 6 months since I had my baby and I've not allowed my husband to have sex with me because I don’t just feel like it. Is that the way everyone feels or is something wrong? – Banke

have been asked by concerned moms and been replied by moms and interestingly dads as well. Read through and see how we helped-a-sista- out!

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Question 2. I just had a baby girl; I'm busty but not lactating very well. Someone said I should take palm wine. Is it effective? – Morenikeji


Ask A Mom

reflex, and you may also tend to delay feedings because they are so unpleasant.

SOME RESPONSES Dear Banke, I bless God for your safe delivery....that itself is a miracle I never get tired of hearing about. To answer your question, I don’t think that is the way every one feels, I for one didn’t take long to get 'dancing' again, I also know of people who were back on the 'dance floor' within a month but then that doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you. There some questions that need to be addressed like was it normal delivery? did you have tears and was stitched?.....even at that I think(in my opinion) 6 months is a long time to abstain, most people work with the 6weeks mark as that is how long before you see your doctor after delivery. You need to feel physically, emotionally and/or psychologically ready. Giving birth and caring for a new baby are huge, exhausting life events. Hormone shifts and sleep deprivation in the weeks after birth are important factors. Dear Morenikeji, I thank God for the new life you have been blessed with. Ability to lactate does not depend on your bust size, while I can’t say specifically if palm wine is effective I do know that people have been advised to take fluids lots of water, pap and beverage with results. The following reasons may be responsible

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Not getting enough sucking stimulation. (If the baby is sleepy or is 'lazy')

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If you are ill or under a lot of stress, your milk supply may be low.

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If your nipples are very sore, pain may inhibit your let down

Here are some suggestions on how to increase it:

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Take care of yourself. Try to eat well and drink enough fluids. You don’t need to force fluids – if you are drinking enough to keep your urine clear, and you aren’t constipated, then you’re probably getting enough. Drink to thirst, usually 6-8 glasses a day

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Nurse frequently for as long as your baby will nurse.

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Offer both breasts at each feeding. Try “switch nursing”. Watch your baby as he nurses. He will nurse vigorously for a few minutes, then start slowing down and swallowing less often. He may continue this lazy sucking for a long time, and then be too tired to take the other breast when you try to switch sides.

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Try massaging the breast gently as you nurse. This can help the rich, higher calorie hind milk let down more efficiently.

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Make sure that you are using proper breastfeeding techniques. Check your positioning to make sure that he is latching on properly. — Kemi Dan-Owolabi ..................................................

Dear Banke, I don’t have a child yet but I know that this what am about to say will help you. You see sometimes when we walk with God we tend to forget to take some things to Him but He cares and wants to help us through life.

...I think it is the job of the husband to lovingly help you to resume sex and there are a million ways to help out Why will God give you a child to replace your husband? Proverb 31 reads that virtue lies on the inside of you because God formed you like that. Don’t loose focus my dear - refocus and pray! I pray that you receive the strength to stop getting weary by looking at the flesh and start looking inward. Receive the Grace to keep your home in Jesus name. Amen — Laura Oloyede .................................................. Dear Banke, I don’t think you should get too disturbed at the answers you are getting but see them as sincere views pointing to the fact that 6 months is getting too long to resume sex if; -you are not ill -your husband is not out of town. These are the only reasons why sex between two love birds who had sex to have this baby in the first place should take that long. i think you need to really analyze and sit your husband down and discuss

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Ask A Mom

your feelings with him and if he has not confronted you for not getting on the dance floor like kemi put it, then he also needs some counseling. I mean, i think it is the job of the husband to lovingly help you to resume sex and there are a million ways to help out; He could take you to dinner and a night out while grandma or even an aunt helps out with your baby. He could come earlier than he normally does and help out with the chores so you could both have an early night and get dancing. He could come home with a lovely meal from the restaurant with chilled drinks and maybe some flowers and the two of you could just chill out while someone could just come in for the night and baby sit. He may even just get you a card and slip in a love note reassuring you of his love for you and that might be all the magic you need to get the music playing. —Folawe Banigbe .................................................. Dear Banke, In my own opinion, you just don't feel like it sounds like a personal choice and that is not good enough. If it had been a medical issue that would have been different. Six months after delivery is a long time to get over the pain of child birth and besides child bearing brings joy to every household, married couple and the people around them. I am not married yet but when I eventually do, I would not appreciate it if I wait six months after child birth to make love to my darling wife. — Ey Datimi .................................................. Dear Morenikeji,

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Take your time and don’t be in haste about lactating. It’s very likely this is your first delivery. Just eat well and be relaxed because it’s sometimes psychological. It might take a couple of days and sometimes weeks before the flow become regular. Another issue is the 100% breastfeeding thing which i think it’s been blown out of proportion. (though the best if you can) So don’t worry yourself. Listen more to your body and understand how it works, consult your gynaecologist when necessary and your baby will be okay. —Alabi Pd .................................................. Dear Banke, While it's accepted that you would have gone through a lot of emotional, physical and psychological strain in having a baby, I think 6 months is long enough to start getting your body in shape, resume all your regular activity and overall get your groove back. Please check your convictions about your husband. Do check out how you have always felt towards your husband. —Amos Aiyede .................................................. Dear Banke, Well it is okay to feel that way but to allow it control you for that long is not good, or was the experience so horrifying that you do not want it to happen again? Well, i want you to know that sex has so many benefits that you are essentially missing out on. Take courage to go on and satisfy your husband again, and be careful not to let him do but he would regret. It is well. Things will work out for your good. Just call your man and explain how you feel

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Try to eat well and drink enough fluids... Drink to thirst, usually 6-8 glasses a day. and apologize to him. Sex is important to every man. All the best — Dr Olubunmi Ogunrinde .................................................. Banke dear, Is nice you speak out and not bottle up your feelings. I agree with you. I had my last baby 3 months ago and felt same, but the moment I realized that am having my way too much, i spoke some sense to myself, fought the odd feelings and I was able to stand on my feet. Banky, here in UK if you start having such feelings you will be advised to take depression test, which is done to every woman after having her baby; it’s just a questionnaire to help detect depression and fight it. Another thing you must take into consideration is your understanding husband. Do not let your feelings go out of hand; talk it through with him and if there is a way you want it done, tell him. If you need anything to help put you back in the mood, get it fast. I want you to know that women can hold on much longer than men, even if your hubby is a good and understanding man, he still needs to be treated fairly. Banky, be bold and courageous, you can do it, I mean NOW. — Tolu Akinnibi Odubanjo P&Y


Places to Get Pregnancy and You Magazine

Terra Kulture 1376, Tiamiyu Savage Street, Victoria Island, Lagos. 01-2700588.

Med Plus 45, Saka Tinubu, Victoria Island, Lagos. 01- 2710140 Daystar Chris an Centre, Ikosi Road, Oregun, Lagos. House on The Rock. The Haven. 6b, Lasale Close Off Shehu Shagari. Maitama, Abuja. 08055237930 CCD Superstores 116, Ogudu Road Lagos. 01-8726049. Mercy Seed Bookshop. RCCG Strong Tower Sanctuary Lagos. 08023294582.

Aunty Ti ’s Place 38, Circular Road. Elkahia.Port Harcourt. 08025015397. Laterna Ventures Limited 13, Oko-Awo Street, Victoria Island, Lagos. Encounter Bookshop Webic, Ogudu Road. Lagos. 08052190357. Kids & More 12,Ondo Close, Old Bodija, Ibadan. 08023720084.

THISDAY Media Centre The Palms, Lekki Lagos. 08075071057. Kiddies Affairs 45,Ekwema Crescent Owerri, Imo State. 08034531990. Glendora Interna onal Nigerian Interna onal Airports Book Store. Global Harvest Church Plot A2, Hakeem Balogun Street, Alausa, Ikeja, Lagos. 08034220188.

Vivid Digital photos and 8a, Igwuruta Rd. Rumu Kurushi Port Harcourt. 08037403272. PHARM AFFAIRS 108, Ogudu Road. Lagos. Triumphant Assembly Churches Int’l. Ijokodo Junc on, Ibadan. 08023008930. Complete Woman Emab Plaza. Wuse 2. Abuja. 08033110050.


Prolonged Labour —a chain of tragedies BY DR. TAYO ABIARA

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he goal of every pregnancy is the delivery of a healthy baby to a healthy mother. However, this is not always the case due to several factors. These may include factors inherent in the mother, conditions or abnormalities in the baby,

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feature

delay in seeking health care due to ignorance or overconfidence, seeking care from untrained personnel or in a non-conducive environment where facilities for emergency interventions are not close by. Labour is said to be prolonged when a woman has been having painful uterine contractions with membranes ruptured for over 24hours or if she has been in spontaneous active phase of labour with ruptured membranes over 12 hours. Active phase of labour starts from a cervical dilatation of 4cm. However, the timing of the onset of labour is very subjective as it is determined by the mother or relatives. Prolongation of labour is a sign of difficult labour and if neglected can lead to several complications both in the mother and the baby. It usually occurs in unsupervised labours or labours not supervised by appropriately skilled personnel. EFFECTS OF PROLONGED LABOUR

• Prolonged labour can lead to infection of the membranes surrounding the baby and consequent infection of the lining of the womb. This may cause severe ill-health in the mother after delivery. • It can lead to fetal distress where the baby starts manifesting irregular, fast or slow heart rate which if not intervened on time can lead to birth asphyxia. This may lead to delivery of a limp baby who may have brain damage, mental retardation with delay in developmental milestones, fetal death or death in the first 7 days of life. • It may also cause distress in the mother with dehydration and exhaustion. If the woman in

labour is neglected, prolonged labour can lead to obstruction. This is however a catastrophe that is hardly ever seen in the developed world. It leads to a myriad of complications which are not limited to fetal death, vessico-vaginal fistula, nerve damage, bleeding, rupture of the womb and at worst death of both mother and baby. Hence prolonged labour is better avoided at all costs. • Nulliparous women (who have never delivered before) are more prone to prolonged labour than their counterparts who have had one or more deliveries. This is because they are more likely to have inadequate contractions, disproportion between the baby and the mother’s pelvis and tight perineal muscles. CAUSES OF PROLONGED LABOUR

• A contracted that is small or abnormal pelvis. • A baby lying abnormally such as transversely (sideways) or obliquely (on one side). • A large baby or a baby with an abnormality such as a big head. • When the baby is coming with a body part other than the well flexed head. • Abnormal uterine contractions, either inco-ordinate or not strong enough or not lasting long enough. These factors slow down the rate of dilatation of the cervix and descent of the baby through the birth canal. Poor maternal effort in pushing out the baby after full dilatation of the cervix is also contributory and may be due to fatigue, starvation or a medical condition in the mother.

PREVENTION OF PROLONGED LABOUR

• Early Detection Early recognition of slow labour is the first step in prevention of prolonged labour. Prompt intervention makes a whole lot of difference as such options including the augmentation of labour if due to inadequate contractions, or performing a caesarean section to deliver the baby are help to prevent complications from occurring. • Presence of a Skilled Personnel Hence it is best to have one’s baby in a place where adequately skilled personnel are present to supervise the labour and where facilities for quick referral are available should the need arise. • Pelvis Size Some risk factors such as short stature (less than 1.52metres) can be recognized during antenatal care. This may be suggestive of a small pelvis. Although the best test of the adequacy of the pelvis is the baby’s head. Such women can be closely monitored and counseled on mode of delivery prior to the onset of labour. Women should register for antenatal care after the second missed period and attend regularly for optimal health monitoring and surveillance of the baby’s state of health. Sighting of blood, rupture of membranes or onset of painful uterine contractions should make a woman report at the labour ward. Women should also be empowered to make decisions on venue of delivery and financially empowered to choose good healthcare services. Women have been blessed with the duty of carrying the new life within their bodies and giving birth. They should not suffer or die in the process! P&Y

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Pregnant… and Single ou just ran the test, either with a home kit or at a hospital laboratory, and it is positive. The result that would bring joy and happiness to others has brought you to tear-filled

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eyes, confusion and fear. “What am I going to do?” “How would he take this?” “How am I going to face mum & dad and tell them?” whatever the situation that surrounds your pregnancy, you definitely do not share the same feelings or reaction of

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SAILING SOLO TO MOTHERHOOD

a woman settled in a home, with a loving partner, expecting to start a family; even though you both carry the same kind of life inside you. You may be a young ambitious woman who just got caught up in this; a young lady in school, a working class lady who just fell


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head over heels in love with this guy, and you are not even sure he is ready to commit himself to you. You may be divorced and pregnant. You may also be a widow grieving for your husband, only to realize you are pregnant. You don’t know what to feel any longer; grief or joy. This is a point in your life where you suddenly come to a standstill, though your body seems to be moving at top speed, with no intention of applying breaks till the next nine months. The truth is it is never quite the same. The woman's partner is the natural choice for sharing the ups and downs of pregnancy. But when you are without a partner, you may feel like you have no one to share the joy of your pregnancy with. While pregnancy may seem scary at times, it is also a happy and miraculous time of your life. Don't let your single status prevent you from enjoying this amazing time in your life. The first thing I would advise you do is, sit down. Yes. Sit down and think very carefully. Because a lot of other circumstances surround being pregnant and single; a couple of which has been stated earlier. It is difficult to give the same advice or state a rule of thumb to live by in the subsequent months and for rest of your life. After you have taken some time to be quiet, then make vital decisions that will help you transit into motherhood. The next thing you really need to do is see your doctor. You would also need some counsel and motivation either from

“The first thing I would advise you do is, sit down”. a professional or a close family member and loved one. Let your family know what you are facing right now and the family of the guy responsible for this pregnancy. After you have decided to adapt to this new status, in addition to the normal adjustments of pregnancy, you will have to adjust to other facts:  This is life you are carrying and in a short while you will be nursing an individual who is going to be solely dependent on you for a long time. Hence you must evaluate your financial status and plan to cater for this child’s needs and demands. It is not too early to open an account and start saving up for the child’s future. Babies are quite expensive, and it’s harder on one income than two.  You must choose a proper, standard and affordable hospital that will take care of you and your unborn child till delivery and beyond. Antenatal classes are

important, and in case you do not want to go alone, get a close friend or a family member to go with you. Choosing a birth partner is also very important. You will need the support and encouragement during child birth.  Note that you will be making a lot of decisions on your own, so you need to be well informed and believe in yourself.  This is more of a roller coaster ride for you than the average married woman, so get ready to swing between moods, sometimes as a result of inconsistent hormone levels; but you must decide to be strong and avoid depression. It is not healthy for you or the baby. Snap out of mood swings; call up a friend, go to the movies or go stay with your loved ones.  This is also a time to focus inward and look on the bright side of life. You are about to become a mother, and this is a calling to a higher life. It is one of the most rewarding journeys in life, however demanding and tasking it may be. Get rid of bitterness at this time and decide to view things differently. It is not easy; but you must try. No matter the situation that surrounds your present status which makes you either confused, bitter, angry, grievous or even excited (perhaps you decided to get pregnant as a single), one fact remains the same; you are sailing solo on the journey to motherhood and you will have to come to that phase where you look at your fast protruding belly, hold your arms across it and tell that littler thing inside of you, “ we are in this together and we will come out of the tunnel strong and kicking.” P&Y

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health

Increasing your chances of multiple pregnancy wins do hold a particular fascination for a lot of people and a lot of research has been done into how a woman can increase the chances of her having a twin pregnancy. Some of the results are fairly unusual. For instance, the mother's diet may influence whether she has a higher chance of a twin pregnancy. There are more twins in certain cultures and one of these is a tribe (a settlement in Oyo state, Nigeria is an example) where they eat a lot of yams. So there is a theory that it is a certain chemical in the yams that helps the women in this culture have a twin pregnancy. Obviously, the mother needs to eat more than

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just yams to have a healthy pregnancy but it is an interesting theory that she may want to consider if she wants a twin pregnancy. If a woman is breastfeeding when she conceives, then she is more likely to have a twin pregnancy than women who are not breastfeeding. Breastfeeding causes a reduction in the amount of calcium in the woman's system and this has an effect on the egg during conception and ovulation can increase the chances of her having a twin pregnancy. Older women are more likely to have a twin pregnancy. There is an increased ovulation of multiple eggs in older women and this can

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lead to a higher chance of the woman having a twin pregnancy. Fertility treatments can also lead to an increased chance of multiple pregnancies. It is also evident that women from African backgrounds are more likely to have pregnancies that are twins or more. There used to be a theory that twins actually skipped a generation, but now it is widely believed that a twin is more likely to have a twin pregnancy. Obviously, this is genetic, but it is another point to consider if you are a twin and want to become pregnant. Similarly, if your family history has a lot of twins, then there is an increased chance that you will have a twin pregnancy too.



Eating for two 60

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While it is always important to eat a well-balanced, nutritious diet, when you are pregnant it takes on a whole new significance. You’re not only eating for your own well being now, but you’re also consuming enough food to sustain the growing fetus inside of you. However, that does not mean you need to eat twice as much. You might be eating for two actually but not eating times two. Eating a variety of nutritious foods will help ensure that you consume enough calories for you and your baby. The quantity of calorie you need per day depends on your age and sex as well as your current height, weight and physical activity level. For the average person, the caloric intake ranges from 1,600 to 2,400 calories a day. When you’re pregnant, you will need to consume an extra 300 calories a day. That may seem like a lot but, a serving of pounded yam contains about 470 calories so it’s not difficult to make up. If you were underweight or overweight at the start of your pregnancy, or if you are expecting multiples, your caloric and dietary needs will be different. Eating a healthy diet during pregnancy has been found to drastically aid in fetal development. Good maternal health and diet has been found to decrease the risk of miscarriage and premature labor as well as

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minimize the baby’s risk of illnesses. YOUR DAILY INTAKE Your daily serving for each of the food groups increases with pregnancy. When you’re pregnant, you will need 4 to 6 servings of dairy every day (a serving is equal to 250ml of milk). You will also need 6 to 11 servings of grains (a serving is equal to one slice of bread) along with 3 to 4 servings of protein (two tablespoons of peanut butter, one to two eggs). You will need four servings of fruit a day while you will need up to five servings of vegetables a day (a serving is one medium size fruit or vegetable, 125ml of 100% fruit juice, or a cup of salad). HERE ARE A LIST OF FOODS TO BE CAREFUL ABOUT IN PREGNANCY AND WHAT NOT TO DO. • Fried food and junk food. These are high in fat and calories and have very little nutritional

• Processed foods. The more your food has been handled, the fewer nutrients it will contain. Choose whole grains and fresh fruits or vegetables more often. • Sauces, gravies, and butter. They all contain lots of fat and calories. Look for low-fat versions whenever possible. • Prepared frozen meals. Although they can be convenient, they can also be loaded with fat and calories. Look for frozen meals labeled as "low-fat" or make extra portions of your dinner and freeze them. • Don’t skip breakfast. Both you and your baby need to start the day off right. Missing breakfast means that you will need to spend the rest of the day catching up in calories and this may cause you to overeat.

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• Don’t over-serve. Keep your portions small; you can always take seconds if you’re still hungry. This will also keep you from eating too much. NOT WHEN YOU ARE PREGNANT! Alcohol A woman who drinks alcohol while she is pregnant may harm her unborn baby (fetus). Alcohol can pass from the mother’s blood into the baby’s blood. It can damage and affect the growth of the baby’s cells. Brain and spinal cord cells are most likely to have damage. Saccharin Saccharin is an artificial sweetener known as Sweet 'n Low. It can be found in beverages, candies, toothpaste and some medicines. Studies have shown that saccharin can cross the placenta, and, because of slow fetal clearance may remain in fetal tissue.

Good maternal health and diet has been found to decrease the risk of miscarriage and premature labor as well as minimize the baby’s risk of illnesses.

Seafood with High Mercury Level Fish can be one of the healthiest foods you can eat --

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especially during pregnancy. A diet that includes a variety of fish helps a child's growth and development. Women of reproductive age, in particular should include fish in their diets because of the nutritional benefits. However, high levels of mercury contamination in some particular species (for example, sword fish) could turn eating some seafood into a serious risk with the potential to harm the nervous system of your developing baby. Excessive Caffeine Caffeine is considered to cause certain risks during pregnancy. Though researchers debate how much caffeine is acceptable during pregnancy, there is evidence to suggest that any amount will cause some physical effects on your little one. This is because caffeine passes through your placenta and is absorbed by your baby. Adults are able to break down caffeine fairly quickly, because of the chemicals inside of our body. However, your developing baby can't do this as efficiently. This means that caffeine will be stored inside of his blood for longer periods of time, and could reach dangerously high levels. P&Y



Breastfeeding

Guide for Multiple Births BY JOSEPHINE IDIAGHE

he experience of expecting and parenting multiples is undeniably different. The reactions and responses to a multiple pregnancy by families and health professionals is never the same to when one child is being expected. There are always unique challenges. Currently, 3% of all live births are multiple births. Multiple births are associated with substantial medical, health care,

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psychosocial, developmental, educational and economic consequences for families and society. INFANT FEEDING The World Health Organization recommends that exclusive breastfeeding continue for at least 6 months. Although breastfeeding initiation rates are high for multiples, relatively few multiple birth infants receive breast milk beyond 3-4 months of age. Some mothers of multiples describe breastfeeding as

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convenient, timesaving and relatively easy. Others find that it is time-consuming, stressful and fraught with ongoing challenges and problems. Mothers usually give reasons why they wean their multiples prematurely such as inadequate milk supply, time taken for feeding, latching difficulties and fatigue; I must confess that breastfeeding an infant exclusively takes determination and so breastfeeding in multiple births will take double determination.


feature Mothers are assured that it is possible to breast feed two or more. Mothers and fathers may be apprehensive about managing breastfeeding while coping with other family responsibilities. Good antenatal preparation, specific to feeding multiples, is essential. Besides the nutritional and immunological benefits, breastfeeding facilitates the mother-infant attachment process by enabling the mother to build a close relationship with each infant. Many women are capable of producing enough breast milk to meet the nutritional needs of their multiples. Others satisfactorily combine a breast milk feed with infant formula or even human donor milk. Breastfeeding success is related to encouragement, maternal commitment and perseverance, early breastfeeding initiation, avoidance of infant formula, sufficient home support and evidence-based assistance from health care providers’ aids in breastfeeding successfully. The benefits of breastfeeding your multiples cannot be over emphasized, but it is evident that the logistics of feeding two or more infants can be successful with proper education and support from family and mothers who have breast fed multiples too. EXCLUSIVE OR PARTIAL BREASTFEEDING Based on the decision by the mother to either breastfeed her multiples exclusively or partially, mothers may:

• Adopt a rotation system whereby one or two infants receive a full breast milk feeding and the remaining babies, an infant formula or donor milk feeding; fully breastfeed all infants during parts of the day (or night) and offer other forms of milk at the other times.

• Provide some breast milk at every feed to all infants and complement each baby’s feeding with other forms of milk. Consecutive and simultaneous breast and bottle feeding • Parents may also change options within a 24-hour period and as the children grow. Consecutive breast feeding allows the mother to ensure correct latching and suckling technique and to devote attention to one infant at a time. This option may be preferred by mothers until

over time, even within a 24 hour period: • It could be feeding based on the desire of each infant. • It could be feeding based on the baby who is awake at the time of feed. • It could be feeding based on time arrangement for each baby.

EXPRESSED BREAST MILK Having milk expressed and stored when mother is less busy affords her time to rest. Breast milk can be kept or stored when

Besides the nutri onal and immunological benefits, breas eeding facilitates the mother-infant a achment process by enabling the mother to build a close rela onship with each infant. breast feeding is fully established. It may also be preferred if no help is available or when feeding in public. • Simultaneous feeding is quicker once the infants are skilled at latching and suckling. Some mothers find it more comfortable. In some cases, it is best to first attach the infant who is having difficulties. In other situations, the infant who latches easily may be started first in order to establish the milk ejection reflex for the infant having more difficulty. FEEDING TIMES Decisions need to be made about feeding times. Some mothers may switch approaches

continuously frozen for over one month. Breast milk can be bottled and refrigerated if needed in a short while and warmed up in tepid water before feeding time. Thawed milk should not be refrozen; it is extremely vital to prevent food poisoning in infants. Feeding utensils should be well washed, sterilized and handled with care. The development of all children is also affected by the opportunities available to them. The logistics of keeping an eye on more than one toddler at once and the demands that two or more can require may be overwhelming. Preparation for parenting multiple birth children is the key to successful breast feeding in multiple births. P&Y

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A Different Ball Game

(Preparing for a multiple birth) “Alright ma’am. Do you feel pressed now? I guess we can go in for the scan.” The doctor told Cynthia as she holds her husband’s hand tight in anticipation. She does not know what to feel. It’s been a mixture of everything: excitement, thrill and real wonder. This is the same person who waited endlessly for 7 years after

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her wedding to James, before they had any child. Now just when they got prepared to have the next baby after Angel, their first child, the test came out positive at the first attempt. “This is it darling, hopefully Michael is here and after him, we are done. No more. We wanted just the two of them anyway.” “I agree


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with you, sweetie,” James nods in agreement as he’s had his share of excitement and adrenalin rush since Cynthia told him she was pregnant. How thankful he felt. It’s just been about a month that he has been praying to God to open up Cynthia’s womb again. Since his marriage to the love of his life for about 11 years now, the only part he hated was when his wife would break down in tears virtually every month for about 6 years of the whole term and cry bitterly for not being able to get pregnant and when she finally did, he told God, “I never want to see Cynthia cry like that again, Lord.” The pregnancy is about 13 weeks now and Cynthia could have sworn the pregnancy was more advanced than that, since she feels so much activity within her, she said ” it can’t be just 13weeks.” “Well, from the date of your LMP, the fetal stage is about

that, and feeling your belly as well, your height of fundus does not dispute this fact. Since we are about to do a scan, we will make more conclusions from that. Drink some water, wait till you are pressed and I will call you.” the doctor had replied. Now they are in for the scan and Cynthia just couldn’t let go of James’ hands. She remembered how she burst into tears when she saw Angel in the first scan. She had no idea what this would bring. “Okay, let’s see. Hmm, some images of your baby are coming up from the screen, but it’s funny, oh... my, madam, I think you are expecting twins.” “What!” Cynthia and James exclaimed in unison as she did not even notice she had abruptly dropped James’ hands. “Wait a minute, Mr. and Mrs. Okoh, actually you are expecting a set of triplets. Congratulations.” “Cynthia, come back! Where are you running to?” James went after his wife who jumped out of the hospital bed and took to her heels…

It is always alarming news when you are told you are expecting more than one bundle of joy even if you have desired it or taken measures to put you on toll for multiple pregnancy. You thought you would feel nothing but excitement and immense joy, no doubts; I bet you are not as prepared as you think you are. Desiring it is one thing, but to actually carry them and care for them after they are born is a different ball game altogether. Things will have to change; not only physically, but mentally, emotionally and financially. Twins run in a mother’s genes and not the fathers. This is a medical fact and anyone who tries to dispute this is not well versed on the subject. If your maternal grandmother had twins, then your mother could have had twins and you can have twins. However if your paternal grandmother had twins, then you will not have twins. Twins can either be identical which means they were formed from one egg which splits into two

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or fraternal which means that 2 eggs were fertilised. In the case of triples, 3 separate eggs were fertilised. Sometimes in very rare cases however, 2 eggs could have fertilised and 1 split making two. With quadruplets, 4 or more eggs were fertilised, although again in very rare cases eggs split once fertilised. In past generations, couples had little warning of multiple births and often received the news in the delivery room. With the technology available today, most couples are well aware that they are expecting more than one baby long before the birth, usually at the 12-week scan. This equips expectant mothers and their partners with enough knowledge to prepare them for what is ahead. If you are expecting more than one bundle of joy, you might be a bit daunted by the prospect, but there are a few things you should expect while expecting your ‘bundles’ of joy: HEALTH As soon as you find out that you are expecting multiples, it is

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important to start taking extra care of yourself and your babies. Your doctor or midwife will want to see you more often than a woman carrying a single foetus. You will also have more scans and diagnostic tests than in single foetus pregnancies. Double, triple or quadruple babies usually mean double, triple or quadruple symptoms, due to vastly increased hormone levels coursing through your body. Possible symptoms could be morning sickness, indigestion, heartburn, constipation, haemorrhoids, oedema, stretch marks, varicose veins or shortness of breath. It is a good idea to try to plan for these and have extra help at hand. Your medical practitioner might even be able to give you suggestions on ways to relieve these symptoms. Your body is working extra hard to grow more than one baby and you’ll need extra rest and nutrients to help it to do this. You will need to make sure that you spend some extra time resting each day. You will also need to make sure that you take in extra nutrients. Take note

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that a multiple pregnancy may not last as long as a single one. Below is a good idea of how long you might expect to be pregnant for: Twins: 37 weeks Triplets: 33 weeks Quadruplets: 29 weeks Weight Gain Weight gain in a multiple gestation will be a lot more than in a single foetus pregnancy. Extra babies mean extra weight, not only because of the added weight of the babies, but also because of the extra baby by-products (extra placenta and amniotic fluid). If you are carrying twins you will gain about double the weight than if you were carrying a single foetus, triple if you are expecting triplets and so on. If this weight is gained in a healthy way, as recommended above, it will help to give your babies a healthy, weighty start to life. MULTIPLE SHOPPING Expecting the birth of multiples creates a larger dent in your finances than one baby would, because it means you would be purchasing more of each item. It is


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therefore wise to get what is extremely important and buy one of what is not necessary to buy more of. For instance, a bath is enough as you will not put them in the bath at the same time. But items you cannot compromise on are car seats and perhaps clothing. Planning and creating a budget is very helpful. You could also make use of items friends and family are willing to give. Be as reasonable as possible. MULTIPLE RESTS With the increased risk of complications associated with a multiple birth, many moms require some level of bed rest during their pregnancy. Bed rest could be prescribed to alleviate a potential health risk to the mother (such as pre-eclampsia), or for the babies (such as preterm labor). Some doctors routinely prescribe rest after 24 weeks, while others take a

"wait and see" approach. Bed rest can actually take several forms, ranging from complete hospitalization to occasional resting. It's important to understand your limitations, and adhere to them. Clear communication with your doctors will ensure the best outcome, so be sure to discuss all of your questions and concerns with your doctor. MULTIPLE LABOUR AND BIRTH Giving birth is always amazing. The process for giving birth to twins or more is doubly amazing. The position of the babies will largely determine how they are born (majorly for twins though; because the birth of more is uncompromisingly caesarean). No matter how your babies come into the world, be prepared for a sudden change. Be willing to accept help when offered and take the time to

get to know each of your new little bundles. MULTIPLE JOY Regardless of the stress and demands, besides the anxiety and anticipations, the arrival of a multiple bundle is an awesome wonder and though you are in for a lot of sleepless nights and arrival of troops in your home, it becomes a different world just in a twinkle of an eye, and each time you look at those little cuties, you know you really are experiencing nothing but multiple joy. P&Y

“...the arrival of a mul ple bundle is an awesome wonder�

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What You May Be Concerned About BY DR. AKINYEMI OLALEYE

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From the time you confirm you are pregnant till the day your bundle of joy arrives you want to know what is right for your baby and perhaps if the way you feel at any point in time has no adverse effect against your baby. These are basic symptoms a pregnant woman may experience which could raise concerns; they have not been stated out to scare you but to let you know that no matter what it is someone has been there before and when you take the proper actions you will be just fine. EXCESSIVE VOMITING IN PREGNANCY While pregnancy sickness is common and not usually harmful to you or your baby, severe vomiting can interfere with your nutrition and cause dehydration and weight loss. If you are vomiting many times a day your doctor should offer you anti-sickness drugs or antihistamines (which are safe in pregnancy). You may have to try several until you find relief. If antihistamines do not help, other drugs can be given. If treatment at home doesn't stop the vomiting, you may become dehydrated, under-nourished or start to lose weight. If this happens, you may be admitted to hospital where you will be put on drip to replace lost fluids, vitamins and minerals. Fever in Pregnancy Fever in pregnancy sets in when a pregnant woman has a body temperature of over 37.5°C.There are several causes of fever in pregnancy including Malaria, urinary tract infection , septic abortion, hepatitis, typhoid fever, chest infection and so on. If urinary tract infection is suspected tests will be run to confirm and treatment should commence immediately. Malaria is usually considered the most likely diagnosis in a

pregnant woman with fever in subSaharan West Africa. Therefore it is quite normal to start treatments for malaria when there is not an instant facility to confirm the cause of the fever. LOWER ABDOMINAL PAINS AT EARLY AND LATE PREGNANCY Lower abdominal pain is a common yet important complaint in pregnancy. Many women will experience occasional bouts of lower abdominal pain during pregnancy. While frightening, at best abdominal pain during pregnancy may be a normal and harmless condition. Lower abdominal pain during pregnancy can sometimes suggest a more serious problem however, so it is important you consult with your healthcare provider if you have any concerns regarding abdominal pain during pregnancy Many women experience lower abdominal pain during the early weeks of pregnancy. There are many reasons for this; for some women occasional or discomfort during pregnancy similar to menstrual cramps may simply be a sign that your uterus is preparing to carry your baby through the next nine months of pregnancy. Abdominal pain accompanied by other symptoms however, including chills, fever, spotting or bleeding may be a sign that something more serious is happening. If this is the case you should contact your health care provider immediately. •

ECTOPIC PREGNANCY This is a serious condition that occurs in early pregnancy when a fertilized egg attaches outside of a woman's uterus. Normally the egg attaches to a fallopian tube. Typically this condition is caught in the first few weeks of pregnancy. When not treated an ectopic

pregnancy is very serious and may result in rupture of the fallopian tubes. Signs and symptoms of an ectopic pregnancy include spotting, abdominal pain and tenderness, bleeding, back pain, shoulder pain, dizziness or faintness •

MISCARRIAGE Occasionally lower abdominal pain is a sign of a pending miscarriage. Symptoms of miscarriage typically include bleeding that is light or heavy and menstrual like cramping that gradually increases in intensity. Other women experience back pain. If you confirm a pregnancy then experience spotting, bleeding and cramping, be sure to contact your doctor right away.

• PRETERM LABOR Some women experience lower abdominal pain or cramping further along in their pregnancy. This may be a sign that your uterus is stretching, but may also be a sign of premature labor. Preterm labor is simply described as the regular abdominal contractions that start dilating and effacing the cervix. You may experience vaginal discharge that is a bloody mucous accompanied by cramping or low back pain. Be sure you contact your doctor immediately to rule out premature labor. In many cases early labor can be stopped effectively allowing mothers to carry their baby to term. If the pains are due to labour pains, they usually occur after 37 weeks of pregnancy and they increase gradually in frequency and duration over time. Braxton Hicks contractions may also occur in late pregnancy with associated mild pains. The good news is most women will experience mild abdominal discomfort throughout their pregnancy that occasionally occurs

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from the uterus stretching, from gas or even from constipation. Round ligament pain may result in short, stabbing and sharp aches in one or both sides of the abdomen. Fortunately this pain is relieved relatively quickly simply by relaxing or changing positions. Try to remain calm regardless of what you are experiencing, and remember when in doubt contact your health care provider immediately. Your doctor can help identify the cause of your abdominal pain during pregnancy and put your mind at ease in most cases. COUGHS AND COLDS Colds cause the lining of your nose and throat to become irritated and inflamed and this in turn produces typical cold symptoms including a blocked or runny nose, a sore throat, mild earache,

sneezing and coughing, headaches, tiredness and a fever. They can last up to a fortnight but are usually at their worst during the first few days. However, if you experience a very high temperature or severe, persistent symptoms you should

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take a visit to your doctor to make sure that your cold hasn't developed into a more serious infection. It's best to avoid 'over the counter' cold treatments during pregnancy as many contain substances such as alcohol, decongestants and antihistamines that either aren't safe, or haven't been approved for use by pregnant or breastfeeding mothers. Most cold medicines aren't actually able to clear the cold virus and instead just help to alleviate the symptoms something that can be achieved with a range of alternative remedies. The best thing you can do for you and your baby when you catch a cold is to get plenty of rest. Your body can fight infections better when you're not rushing about so taking some time out to look after yourself and recover properly works as well.

Eating a balanced diet that includes plenty of fruit and vegetables will not only help ward off any infections but will also help you to recover full fitness. It is also important to drink plenty of fluid and possibly hot tea.

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To help alleviate congested sinuses you could try creating a mini-steamer by placing a few drops of tea tree, peppermint or eucalyptus essential oil in a bowl with very hot water, placing a towel over your head and spending a few minutes breathing in the refreshing steam. You could also try to damp a warm flannel over your sinus area to help relieve the feeling of pressure there. It's safe to take Paracetamol during pregnancy and this can help to relieve cold symptoms however you should take care to avoid aspirin, codeine, Ibuprofen and other mixed pain killers. Most vapour rubs and cough sweets are fine to take but it’s always best to check with your doctor first. Cough suppressants and expectorants may be safe in pregnancy but the prescription should be left to your doctor. Every drug comes with a leaflet that states its side effects and contraindications. These should be thoroughly scrutinized by expectant mothers before drugs are administered. The place of caution in the use of drugs in pregnancy cannot be overemphasized, it is crucial to the health of both mother and child. A lot of deformities have been known to result from indiscriminate use of drugs. When there’s an unusual symptom, pay attention. Whatever changes you notice should be reported to your doctor, however irrelevant and inconsequential you regard them. It is only proper for you to be extra vigilant and note differences you observe in your body metabolisms. Do not take anything for granted, what you consider minor may actually be critical so it is just advisable to lay all fears to rest by consulting a professional. P&Y



Why Do I Still Look Pregnant?


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ou may be very surprised by the way

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your tummy looks after birth. Your baby is out, but there it is, right around the navel: a big, round,

form of urine, vaginal secretions, and sweat. And the extra fat you put on to nourish the baby will start burning off especially if you're nursing and exercising.

squishy

puffball that makes you look like you're still six months pregnant. Many women also have a dark line down their abdomen called a linea nigra and a web of stretch marks, which are actually little scars caused by the extensive stretching of skin. Those who had a csection have surgical scars to contend with as well. It takes time for your body and especially your belly to fully recover from pregnancy. Imagine your abdomen as a balloon, slowly inflating as your baby grows. Childbirth doesn't pop the balloon; it just starts a slow leak. But don't worry it’s a steady one. From the moment your baby is born, hormonal changes cause your midsection to deflate, shrinking it back to something closer to its pre-pregnancy state. It takes about four weeks for your uterus to contract to its normal size. All the cells in your body that swelled during pregnancy will begin releasing their fluids in the

The good news is that stretch marks usually become considerably less no ceable six to 12 months following childbirth

But it takes at least a while before you notice results. Stretch and the linea nigra, however, endure longer. The good news is that stretch marks usually become considerably less noticeable six to 12 months following childbirth. Their pigmentation fades and they typically become lighter than the surrounding skin (the color will vary depending on your skin color), but their texture will remain the same. The dark color of the linea nigra will gradually fade over a year, but that too may not completely disappear. P&Y

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little packages

How Caffeine Affects Your Children

Most parents wouldn't dream of giving their kids a mug of coffee, but might routinely serve soft drinks containing caffeine. Foods and drinks with caffeine are everywhere, but it's wise to keep caffeine consumption to a minimum, especially in younger children. Caffeine is a drug that's naturally produced in the leaves and seeds of many plants. Caffeine is also made artificially and added to certain foods. Caffeine is found in soft drinks. It’s also found in coffee, tea, chocolate, coffee ice cream or frozen yogurt, as well as pain relievers and other over-the-counter medicines. Caffeine is defined as a drug because it stimulates the central nervous system. At lower levels, it can make people feel more alert and energetic.In both children and adults, too much caffeine can cause jitteriness and nervousness upset stomach headaches, difficulty concentrating, and difficulty in sleeping, increased

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heart rate and increased blood pressure. In young children, it doesn't take a lot of caffeine to produce these effects. Not only do caffeinated beverages contain empty calories (calories that don't provide any nutrients), but children who fill up on them don't get the vitamins and minerals they need from healthy sources, putting them at risk for nutritional deficiencies. In particular, children who drink too much of these fizzy drinks may miss getting the calcium they need from milk to build strong bones and teeth. Keep caffeine intake to the very minimum in your child; offer water, milk, and 100% fruit juice. Feel free to let your kids indulge in a sliver of chocolate cake at birthday parties or a cup of tasty hot cocoa occasionally. These choices don't pack enough caffeine punch to be harmful. As with everything, moderation is the key to keeping your child's caffeine consumption under control. P&Y



Gestational Diabetes BY DR. NIKE BELLO

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suppose ‘diabetes’ is a familiar term; just about everyone has heard of it before- a disorder that arises from one’s body being unable to handle sugar (which is the end product of most foods we eat) properly. This leads to high blood sugar and a myriad of complications that can affect almost every part of the body. Why talk about a disease of ‘old’ people in a pregnancy magazine? Well, because the state of pregnancy increases the probability of diabetes. This type is called gestational diabetes mellitus (hereafter called GDM). In simple terms, it is diabetes that is diagnosed in pregnancy. The body’s hormone-producing glands work hard during pregnancy, as these hormones all have a part to play in maintaining the pregnancy and contributing to the baby’s development. One of the effects of these hormones is the production of glucose from the body’s food stores, which the growing foetus needs for growth. If the pregnant woman’s body is unable to effectively manage the resulting increased blood sugar (glucose), she develops GDM. This has effects on the baby too, as the excess sugar gets into its own bloodstream as well through the placenta, leading to excessive growth and the complications listed below. The large birth weight also makes the baby susceptible to injuries as it negotiates through the birth canal during delivery. In most cases, GDM is predictable. A sufferer may have a family history of diabetes; she is likely to be obese (weighing at least 90 kg), or gain excessive weight during the pregnancy. She may have had GDM in a previous pregnancy, she may have

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Here’s the good news: when diagnosed, GDM can be managed by dietary control, exercise and some mes the use of medica on. previously been delivered of a large baby (4 kg or more), or may have had previous recurrent miscarriages. Doctors ask about these factors during antenatal sessions to identify women at risk and screen them. None of these are mandatory signposts, however. Some women are diagnosed with GDM without having any risk factors. So, what can you do? Offer information (even if he doesn’t ask

you) to your doctor or midwife if you feel you are at risk. Excessive urination and thirst also require attention (but don’t panicpregnancy hormones make you feel hot, so you sweat more, and feel thirsty to replace lost fluid. Not all thirst is caused by GDM, so don’t sweat it (pardon the pun). The urine test performed routinely at your antenatal clinic is also a pointer, if it tests positive for glucose (caused by the excess glucose in the blood spilling into the urine). If your doctor considers you to be at risk for GDM, he’ll carry out some blood tests to confirm the diagnosis. Here’s the good news: when diagnosed, GDM can be managed by dietary control (you’ll be taught to literally count the calories), exercise and sometimes the use of medication. And the blood sugar usually returns to normal after pregnancy, when the hormone levels go back to normal. If GDM persists afterwards, then it probably wasn’t GDM after all. It is more likely to be regular diabetes (if a disease can be called regular) making a fortuitous debut during pregnancy, and will have to be treated and followed up for life. And the bad news? Most women that had GDM go on to develop diabetes over the next 20 years or so- showing that it was because of this predisposition that they had GDM in the first place. Evidence from research, however, shows that the rate of progression may be halved by appropriate lifestyle modifications: weight loss or preventing weight gain and physical activity. An annual diabetes screen after the pregnancy would aid early diagnosis and treatment, offering you a head start. So ladies, be vigilant; your health is completely up to you. Do all things with moderation, and you’ll be just fine.P&Y

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FOR SUBMISSIONS Pregnancy and you magazine welcomes contributions from different kinds of professional freelance writer .We therefore welcome editorial contributions from interested individuals. Also all expecting mothers who are interested in sharing their birth stories are advised to start keeping their birth experience. Birth stories may include pregnancy experience from the first trimester to the third trimester, a detailed report of your birth experience, your experience as a nursing mother, your full names, your baby’s name, your baby’s birth weight, your baby’s birthday. Please include your state of residence. Also photographic materials are accepted but we do not accept photographic material that is of resolution lower than (300dpi).photographic material must be sent as attachment to email. Submission must be sent to birthstories@pregnancyandyou.org (as word separate document) for our Birth Stories segment. Also your questions should be sent to questions@pregnancyandyou.org or deardoctor@pregnancyandyou.org as the case may be. Pregnancy and You would also like to share interesting stories involving cases such as multiple births, extra ordinary experiences with child birth that are inspiring to our readers. You could inspire someone with your miracle! Send your inspiring stories to us at feature@pregnancyandyou.org Email us your details and pregnancy pictures to fashion@pregnancyandyou.org with the title I want to be a model. YOU COULD BECOME A PREGNANCY AND YOU MODEL! However, by sending us your submission, you are giving Pregnancy and You Magazine permission to publish your material. If your Contribution is to be published, you will be notified on the return email or according to contact details provided. P&Y

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Keeping Fit During Pregnancy

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health omen who exercise usually have a better pregnancy, in terms of being more comfortable physically and healthier for the duration of the pregnancy and afterwards. Often, they tolerate the stress and pain of labor better and sometimes they don't require as much medications during labor, or can even get away with taking no medications at all. Stretching exercises can be particularly useful for later ease in labor and delivery With regular exercise during pregnancy, women also recuperate faster after the birth of the baby, whether they have a vaginal delivery or a C-section. Obviously, an additional benefit is not gaining as much weight during pregnancy. In general, exercising seems to go along with eating better and maintaining a more positive attitude toward the pregnancy. Since exercising releases endorphins, it also helps with emotional stress and potential depression. Therefore, if you have not been exercising before pregnancy the good news is that you can start now. But as a beginner you should start by exercising 15 to 20 minutes at a time, three days a week, preferably with a day of rest between workouts. Don’t exercise to exhaustion. A good rule of thumb: Slow down if you can't comfortably carry on a conversation. Be careful to eat properly and get enough fluids. Being pregnant means you need approximately 300 calories a day, depending on your pre-pregnancy weight.

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SOME RULES TO FOLLOW Now that, you've decided to exercise. Here are a few simple, but important, rules to follow:

Drink lots of water. Carry along a bottle of water or a sports drink with you. Wear loose, comfortable clothing (don't get too hot or too cold). Wear comfortable shoes that fit well (Remember, your feet may tend to swell from fluid retention). Do some stretching exercises in advance to get your muscles warmed up and flexible before starting your exercise regimen. Be aware of your center of gravity, as it changes. As pregnancy continues, the center of gravity shifts forward, so women lean backward to compensate. As the shoulders move back and the lower back protrudes forward, accentuating the curvature of the lower spine, the unnatural position can lead to strain on the back muscles and cause back pain. It can also cause you to be a bit off-balance and less coordinated than usual. Get plenty of rest. Don't exercise if you're too tired. SAFE PREGNANCY EXERCISES As a pregnant woman that is new to physical fitness, there are simple exercises you can start with:

Walking: This activity gets top honors for expectant mothers because it's safe, easy to do, and improves your cardiovascular fitness. In short, it's the perfect way to get started if you didn't exercise before pregnancy. Look for low-impact aerobic classes: Look for ones that cater to pregnant women. Swimming: This is a great form of exercise because it uses your whole body and puts little strain on your joints. An added bonus: The water supports your weight, giving you a temporary reprieve from feeling ungainly as your

belly gets bigger. WHEN NOT TO EXERCISE There are some definite conditions during pregnancy where exercise should be avoided at all costs. If you have pre-eclampsia (high blood pressure) or pre-term labor, your doctor will not let you exercise. If you have pain, spotting, bleeding, or have an unusual discharge, do not exercise. If you're feeling light-headed, don't exercise. Pregnant women have a higher tendency to feel lightheaded due to changes in blood volume and blood pressure and how the blood vessels constrict and dilate during pregnancy. This normal condition can lead to dizziness if a woman gets up too fast or lies flat on her back (particularly during the second half of the second trimester). If you are light-headed, it could also be from dehydration. Take a break and drink some water or a sports drink.

Staying physically ac ve is not only important for your general health but also aids recovery and can help with postpartum weight maintenance. Staying physically active and flexible is not only important for your general health and that of your baby, but also aids recovery and can help with postpartum weight maintenance. Have a healthy pregnancy. P&Y

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feature

Dear Doctor Dear Dr, My first child did not walk until 18 months; my younger baby is 15 months and still not walking. Is there any way I can help the situation or am I doing something wrong? –Bolu Dear Bolu, I will say on the average children tend to walk at about 12 months. Since your first child walked at about 18 months it can be from the family familiar pattern and therefore you have nothing to worry about. Family pattern is when

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children tend to grow or behave the way either of the parents did. Maybe one of the parents did not walk on time. It could be a tendency in the family. If nothing is wrong with the first child now i.e. did not just walk on time, then there is no cause for alarm. There are various familiar patterns in the family and children can have the similarities with either parent when growing. It could be speaking, walking etc. There could be problem if there is any sign of abnormality.

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Dear Dr, My babies don’t take breast milk beyond 3 months no matter how hard I try. I’m pregnant now and I don’t know what I can do. - Tolu Dear Tolu, It’s a difficult thing to say why some children stop taking breast milk after 3 months. Some children can stop taking breast milk if cereals or other diets have been introduced to them and they are used to taking it. If the mother’s milk is not optimal, the baby will prefer the other options available because it has been introduced as an alternative which is easier for them. Dear Dr, I still see green poo whenever my 8month old has a bowel movement. Is there something wrong? - Lucy Dear Lucy, Green poo is not an indication of an ailment or a problem. The fact that a baby has green poo does not mean anything. Usually mothers should be concerned with the consistence of the poo; if it’s watery or very hard. The green colour of the poo is an indication of what the baby is feeding on.


baby and you

Dear Dr, when I was cleaning my baby after a bowel movement I noticed she had smudged her hand in it and naturally the hands went straight to her mouth. I felt so agitated I was going to give her antibiotics immediately. What could I have done in such situation? – Kemi. Dear Kemi, There is nothing to be agitated about since your baby did not have a meal of it. A child can have an infection by eating contaminated things. No treatment should be given unless the child manifest signs of infections; it is only when sign of infection is discovered that anti biotic can be given. Crawling babies tend to pick things and it’s not all the time that they get infected as a result because the body has natural defense mechanism to protect them from coming down with various infections. Wait for your baby’s body mechanism to work and if it fails, then you can administer an anti- biotic to your baby recommended by your doctor. Dear Dr, I have read various books and journals where they said babies should not sleep on their tummy but personally I think a baby should lie on his tummy to sleep. What is the best position for a baby to sleep?Janet. Dear Janet, The reason is because there are several reports of Sudden Infant Death syndrome (SIDs); this is suddenly finding infant dead in their cot. This is a discovery in developed countries and not an African thing. Usually because babies have their own rooms and they are left alone by themselves. It is found that babies who sleep on their tummy in the first 3 months of their life are more likely

to be found dead in cot. The explanation is simple because the baby does not have much control of her body and for some reasons the baby turns the head a bit and puts the head on the pillow which increases risk of suffocation. It is therefore advised that babies should be laid on their back or on their side which is the safest position. But in our culture, the baby is closely supervised or watched by an adult. Dear Dr, What part of egg should my baby not eat until 18 months?- Funmi Dear Funmi, The thing about egg by the first year is that babies can eat all parts of the egg but must be properly cooked because there are certain organisms present and if not properly cooked the baby can become sick. Never give raw egg or half boiled egg to a baby because they can take in poison from half cooked egg. One can introduce egg to a baby at 6 months provided there is no family allergy because the baby can inherit it and one has to be very careful. Dear Dr, Is it true that honey is harmful to infants?-Kunle Dear Kunle, Yes. It is advised that babies don’t take honey especially pure honey because it contains bacteria. If a baby takes honey, he can absorb all kinds of poisonous substances. The refined honey is probably good but the problem is that you are not sure about the processing. It is better to go with medical recommendation that honey should not be given in the first year of life of a child and after a year it can be given to the child. Dear Dr, My 15 month child does not have interest in other foods but only takes milk. What can I do?-Cynthia

Dear Cynthia, It is important for a 15 month old to be eating other foods apart from milk. After 6 months the baby needs to have other foods in addition to the milk. The mother should find other foods that the baby would prefer. Maybe the baby does not like the consistency of the food introduced. The mother can try character foods or liquid foods. If liquid food is what is introduced, your baby might prefer it to solid or semi- solid food. If it was introduced earlier the baby might have liked it. Introduce other foods at 4 to 6 months. Children can live alone on breast milk for the first 6 months after this; one can add other things to their food. The mother can make home-made food like pap in small quantity, custard can be introduced and as the child grows mashed food can be introduced like mashed potatoes, rice etc. Dear Dr, When is the normal time to stop breast feeding a baby?- Ijeoma Dear Ijeoma, Baby should be given breast milk for 6 months exclusively before introducing any meal to the baby’s diet and continue breastfeeding the baby until the baby is 2 years, which is the latest recommendation. World Health Organization (WHO) and UNICEF have strongly recommended it. But of course after 6months the milk is not sufficient for the baby. These ques ons have been answered by Dr C. Fadipe (a paediatrician); a member of our team of contributors at Pregnancy and You magazine. She graduated from the University of Nsukka 1988. She had her residence training in paediatrics at the University College Hospital, Ibadan. She is a fellow of West African College of Physicians since 1988. She is married to Ayodele Fadipe and they are blessed with three children. PLEASE SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO: deardoctor@pregnancyandyou.org

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shopping

Shopping

For Two f you’re awaiting the arrival of twins or more, you may be wondering what to buy and what to pass by. Do you really need two of everything? The answer to that is No. There are some baby items that are only used one at a time, so there's no reason to double up. When you're shopping for multiple babies, how do you know what to double up on, and when to stay single? There are some things that every baby needs, but you don't necessarily have to have two of everything for your twins. Get the scoop before you get the goods.

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Your babies can share things like: • Bassinette • Nursery Furniture • Diaper Bag • Baby Monitor • Play Yards or play pen • Stroller

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shopping

THINGS THEY USE ONE AT A TIME. There are some baby items that are only used one at a time, so there's no reason to double up. One example is a diaper changing table. Even if you have lots of helpers, you're not likely to change both babies at the same time. One changing table will be enough. Another item is a baby bathtub for infants. They're not big enough to accommodate two babies, so each baby can take a turn in it. While in most cases I recommend buying two of any type of toy, there are some baby toys that can be used one at a time. Play gyms and play mats for infants are one example. Don't invest in more that one, but rather let them take turns with two different items. • Changing Table • Some toys • Diaper Pail • Baby Bathtub • Baby Care items such as thermometer, nail clippers, hair brush, lotions and soaps.

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YOU SHOULD HAVE MORE THAN ONE OF THESE You will agree with me that there are some things that definitely need to be doubled. Bouncy seats are very handy as an extra set of hands, for feeding, playing and even sleeping. Plan to have at least one per baby. Double high chairs make mealtime more manageable. If you're planning to bathe your older babies or toddler simultaneously, you'll definitely need more than one bath seat. You'll make life much easier by stocking up on all the little items that they'll both want when they see the other has one: sippy cups, pacifiers, snuggly toys, teethers and rattles. Finally, there is one item that you absolutely must have two of: car seats. You won't get far -- not even home from the hospital -unless each and every baby is properly restrained. It's one thing that they should never share. • Car Seats • Bouncy Seats • High Chairs • Bath Seats • Toys in high demand


dad’s corner

What To Pack For The Labour Room… Dad . . .

s the new dad to be, you’ll be responsible for putting together what you’ll need in the delivery room for comfort. Even though the mom to be is the center of attention, you’ll need some things for yourself as well. Labor takes a long time, normally from 12 to 18 hours, perhaps longer. Most of the time labor takes place at night, so it is essential, for you to be comfortable. With that in mind, it is recommended that you have a bag ready to go; not only for her, but for you as well.

distraction during early stages of labor.

A . .. . .

WHAT TO PACK Change of clothing for yourself. You could be there for awhile, so your comfort counts too A bathing towel Have some snacks for yourself handy. A portable CD or cassette player to “set the mood” in the room Cards, board games, word searches, crosswords and such can provide a much needed

A list of phone numbers for the people you’ll want to call once you have your bundle of joy. Scented oils and lotions can help soothe the nervous of the mother, while you’re rubbing the areas she needs massaged.

. . . . .

DON’T FORGET THE CAMERA. Most hospitals don’t allow video cameras in the birthing room anymore, but they encourage picture taking, especially after the baby arrives. And don’t forget to bring plenty of batteries. Your phone charger is very important because you will have to make a lot of calls after your partner’s delivery. If labour is long, you might want some reading material for when your spouse is sleeping or resting. Toothbrush, toothpaste and shaving equipment. Some hospitals let dads stay over night. Pyjamas are a really good idea Your check book or ATM cards.

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1

Dad’s Name: Alabi Ayodeji Baby’s Name: Asher Asiwaju Oluwatobiloba Mum’s Name: Kemisola Baby’s Birthday: 12th June Birth Weight: 3.26k

HIStory

... Pregnancy from the father’s perspective 90

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“My wife did not put up much drama except that she stopped me from using my favourite cologne and I had to resort to an even selected body spray”. PREGNANCY EXPERIENCE The process was an interesting one for me. Though, we had planned to have a baby a year after our wedding but she couldn’t wait that long. So we changed plans. I knew she was going to be pregnant immediately we agreed and the day she told me, I told her I knew it already. I told her how excited i was and how wonderful it feels to look forward to being a father. My wife did not put up much drama except that she stopped me from using my favourite cologne and I had to resort to an even selected body spray. No throwing up, spitting and all that. She maintained her strength throughout pregnancy though I always restrained her from stressing herself. We couldn’t agree much over this as we sometimes had hot argument. She just didn’t see it from my perspective that I wanted her to take more rest and I didn’t see from her perspective that she just needed to do some moving as her form of exercise. I did cook a few times, had helps in the house throughout and her mum came around some months to the delivery (very grateful she did, she was God-sent). She was never in and out of hospital except for normal ante-natal which was necessary for the expecting mothers to come with their spouses at the hospital. At our first ante-natal class, I wasn’t really comfortable with the idea of sitting around several pregnant women till I saw some other men who came with their wives both natives and foreigners. That made more comfortable and relaxed and I attended a couple more classes. BIRTH EXPERIENCE It was an exciting experience for me; I took it very calmly until about

12pm after she was induced and I was told she was about 5cm. They told me it will take an hour for her to dilate per cm at her pace. I got agitated because she was already in pains and I couldn’t stand seeing her in pains. I prayed and didn’t know what to say. I got to the car and I locked the car keys in the car, it was then I knew I was getting really agitated. I called some friends to meet me in the hospital and I called my pastor and some friends who prayed along with me. I was elated and surprised to see the baby was a boy contrary to what the specialists told during the scan sessions. My wife couldn’t believe it when I told her we have a boy though we had no sexual preferences but we had prepared for a girl. FINANCES Babies could have a great effect on the family finances but I think most parents worry over what they ought not to worry about. My wife and I agreed on the basic things and it worked for us. We kept the budget low on expenses for the baby and more on investment for the baby. My wife’s medical need was also priority as well as her clothing. I remembered shopping for her clothes in shops for pregnant women. I realised my baby would soil a Ralph Lauren clothing like he would to one picked from the Wal-Mart; it makes no difference to the ‘poop’. Some parents see babies like another asset that boosts their ego. My wife and I only focused on things that will impact the health, development and creating a loving environment for the psyche of our child. If you have it in excess, you can go all the way but never join in a competition that has no prize and no winner.

HIStory

FATHERHOOD/PARENTING Waking up at night was not my thing at all because I use my night time to work the most. I had excused so many things because of my wife’s pregnancy and I had to resume them. So I was working throughout the day and needed the night for some sleep. This little dude wakes up when we want to sleep. I would carry him sometimes so the mum could sleep and then we would change again. Sometimes I will have my prayer time with him. He loves worship songs so I will sing to him and he will just chuckle at times, look me in the eye as if to say, “Daddy, I feel heaven in your arms”. MOTHERHOOD Mothers are very passionate about almost everything that concerns their children. My wife and mother are somewhat alike in that regard. I sometimes think they are too caring but you can’t have too much of that care anyway. Mothers are never tired of going all the way because of their children; it’s amazing how far a woman would go for the fruit of her womb. I appreciate them a lot. Women are wonderful creatures, they could be very interesting to the adventurous mind and terrible to the closed minded. A woman best articulates the meaning of the most constant thing in life CHANGE!

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HIStory

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Dad’s Name: Caleb Itua Baby’s Name: Praise Mum’s Name: Oluwaseun Birthday: 13th June

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HIStory

PREGNANCY EXPERIENCE My wife and I agreed that we will have our first pregnancy six months after our wedding because I knew that once she gets pregnant things will be definitely different. We were able to achieve this. I noticed that after she got pregnant, she became a different person. She was easily irritated and became very touchy; I had to adjust to the new her. The first thing that put me off was the spitting. She spat so much and often that at a point she had to go around with a container but after a while I got used to it and in fact, I started helping her throw the full container out and wash the bowl. She threw up a lot too and I would have to clean up as well. I did the cooking most of the time because she said she does not want a cook or a help. Apparently as the pregnancy advanced she became stronger and better and the easier it was for the two of us. My wife became so choosy with her diet, I would prepare a meal and she would turn it down after so much effort on my part on the menu of her choice in the first place. At times, she would request for something not presently available and I would go all out to get it for her. But you know in all of these times and drama, I made up my mind to give her my support although it was not very easy and in fact annoying sometimes but I did. I understood that we were in it together. BIRTH EXPERIENCE I was there with her in the labour room. It’s quite amazing how this whole process works. My wife was in a very severe pain I wished I could help her bear some of it. No position was convenient for her and it was so bad. At a point, I thought it was taking too

long so I went to call a nurse but the nurse told me to go back to her and encourage her which was what I did. It got to a point where I was moved to tears because of the pain she was going through so I just left the labour room. While at the reception I just heard people shouting, “congratulations!” and they were coming in my direction. I was so surprised and at the same

“I always look forward to closing from work so I could go home and be with my wife and kid. I love rocking him and feeding him. Oh, I love it. It’s really been worth it”.

time excited that my wife has been relieved of the pain. Not only that, I have suddenly become a father. At the time I was expecting to see a baby girl since that was what I hoped for and with that my wife had refused to tell me the care giver’s speculations of the sex of the baby and her explanation had been that they were not always accurate. I decided to wait. I did not know that my baby was a boy until the day of delivery that was a very pleasant surprise to me. I love him and I appreciate God and my wife for giving me such a beautiful boy. FINANCE Financially we were prepared knowing that we were expectant parents. We adjusted our budget to accommodate the new level of responsibility though it was not an easy task; we had to spend extra to meet up with the demands that come with child bearing. It was time to sacrifice on our part but the bottom line is that it’s all worth it. Today we know what to buy and when to buy them. These had really helped us in our budgeting. My advice to intending parents is that they should plan well ahead for the arrival of their bundle of joy. You need to start planning and saving as early as you can. A lot of parents get broke because they undermine the process. But for us the only constrain is that we had to let go of some other expenses. FATHERHOOD Fatherhood has been a load of responsibilities; as a father you spend more. You have to drop a lot of activities done as a bachelor and spend quality time with your family. I always look forward to closing from work so I could go home and be with my wife and kid. I love rocking him and feeding him. Oh, I love it. It’s really been worth it.

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Feature Interview:

Pastor

Jumoke Adeyemi 94

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“I experienced the blessings that accompany mul ple births”.


feature interview

ll she wanted was another child; but for Pastor Jumoke Adeyemi, of Global Harvest Church, God had a different plan. She had gone to the hospital thinking she had malaria; but after a series of tests, she was found not only pregnant, but pregnant with a set of twins. In this interview, she shares her experience and offers advice to couples preparing for multiple births: P&Y: tell us a little about yourself. PJA: My name is Jumoke Adeyemi; I’m a wife, a mother, a pastor and an administrator. I’m also a life coach and a personnel psychologist. P&Y: You have a set of twins. PJA: Yes I do and they are 9 years old now. They are not my first though; I have two daughters: 15 and 13 years. P&Y: How will you describe marriage? PJA: Marriage is the only institution on earth where you get the certificate before you start learning. Marriage to me is a beautiful, eventful and trying institution where all the attributes of life that God has given you would be tried and tested. Marriage helps you to build strength. Marriage is kept together and kept alive by trust, forgiveness, focus and most especially, God. P&Y: Since you had the single and multiple pregnancies, how would you differentiate the experiences? PJA: It is a world of difference. From my own experience, my first two pregnancies were different from that of the twins. When I was pregnant with the twins, I knew certainly that it was something different. Initially, I thought I was

A

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feature interview

ill, but I noticed that I felt some strength pulling from within me than usual. I did not know I was pregnant with them even though we planned to get pregnant at that time. But because it did not happen the first two times I expected it to happen, I took my mind off it. There is a gap of 5years between my last girl and the twins. My body had totally changed; it was like starting all over again. I thought it was just malaria. I wanted to take

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some anti-malaria drugs. Looking back, I believe it was to save the lives of those children because I could have taken this malaria drug that has a seriously terrible effect on fetal brain. I believe they are special gifts from God and that’s why He kept them. By the time I got to the hospital, my doctor asked me some questions, after which she said, “You know what? I think you should go for a pregnancy test. As a

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matter of fact, I’m sending you for a scan”. After the scan, the doctor told me “Mrs. Adeyemi, this is the year of double double”. I didn’t know what on earth he was talking about so I said to him doc. I don’t understand. He did not tell me I was pregnant; he did not tell me anything, he was just in his own world. Till the scan came out, I did not understand why the doctor was over excited. He showed me the result and said wow! Mrs. Adeyemi


feature interview

congratulations, this is the year of ‘double double’”. Then he turned the picture on the screen to me again and he said, “You are expecting a set of twins”. My head went blank. I just jumped down from the bed, picked my result and headed out. My husband was not in town at that time. So when I got home, he called to ask me about the hospital visitation. I told him we were expecting twins. He just said, “I will call you back”. He called back about an hour later and with some heavy breath he said, “So, how are you doing?” I said I was fine. The truth is that we never planned to have twins. So when this happened he said to me that he believes that its God’s gift then he took a deep breath. A friend encouraged him that twins come with their blessings, he said, “From what I have seen and know you will never run short of resources to take care of those kids.” At this point I will like to encourage everyone that is expecting twins and are apprehensive; twins comes with their blessings and you will never lack taking care of them. After the birth of our twins till date, we have not lacked. In fact our status changed. People sent us gifts from all over the country and beyond. For the first six months of there lives we did not spend a dime on clothes for them. P&Y: The pregnancy? PJA: For me, the first trimester was a bit tough. I had no vomiting, no morning sickness, but I was a bit anemic because my blood level was low before the pregnancy. I couldn’t eat well in the first trimester. In my second trimester it was like a magic; I eat all sorts including what I couldn’t during my first trimester, and I was very healthy. But my third trimester, particularly the last month, I had

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feature interview

swollen foot which was the first time it ever happened to me. I had pimples on my face and back, but my previous pregnancies were not like that; and funny enough, I never carried a big bump in pregnancy, even with the twins. At the last trimester, it was difficult to sleep on my sides, I usually sit to sleep. My twins at birth both weighed 6kg; one was 2.8kg, the other 3.2kg. P&Y: How was your Birth Experience? PJA: Thankfully, we had a very good doctor, I had no tear and I was delivered normally; I believed it was God and the doctor. I was well taken care of and the delivery was a good one. Although we were resident in Ibadan at that time, we registered with a hospital in Lagos, and I was asked to come in so I could be closely monitored. I would go to the hospital about 3 times in a week. Finally I went in one day and the doctor said I was dilating already and asked to watch if it would continue normally or augmentation would be needed. Later the labour was augmented. Finally, the girl came first and fourteen minutes after the boy followed. It was a wonderful experience. The first pushing was the task, but the second time, it was easier. P&Y: As a counselor and mother, what is your perspective about parenting? PJA: Parenting is such a privilege; whether you are a parent to your own children, or to adopted or spiritual children. God is giving you an opportunity to impact a life. It’s an opportunity to build a future. Through parenting, you are able to affect the lives of different individuals and different generations all at once. While you

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where you learn on the job. Parenting for me is such a privilege; it makes you know that it’s a call beyond you. When I look at our teenagers, how they turned out so well, I can’t help but wonder in my mind, Lord, how did you help us to raise these children? When you look at how well they are doing, you will thank God for allowing you to be part of history in their life. There are 5 basic needs of a couple expecting a multiple birth: • • • • •

Encouragement. Emotional Support. Financial Support. A Mother Figure. Prayer.

P&Y: Your husband and family? PJA: My husband was with me throughout; he stood with me throughout pregnancy. Always encouraging me, he did not stress me at all. Everybody was supportive and very wonderful. I really appreciate my mum for her love and care, my mother –in-law, is such a darling and a blessing, I want to say to her that she’s an exceptional mother-in-law and fantastic. And all our friends, church members, and loved ones were there for us also. Its 9 years now, but I cannot forget the contribution of everybody; especially my friend who introduced me to the Hospital, she literally went and did the registration by herself, and she was there for me. I stayed in their house for that purpose, I’m so grateful to them. All these people supported me and I’m forever grateful. P&Y

are parenting you are also maturing and learning. It’s an institution

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 3

INTERVIEW BY OLORUNLOGBON FOLASADE


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