The Power of Play

The Pursuit of Freeing the Inner Child

Connection & Fulfillment Derived from Within

by Sophia Blair

As we grow older, we tend to lose touch with the sense of childlike wonder, boundless creativity, and the passion for play that once came so naturally to us. However, these aspects of ourselves, collectively known as the “inner child,” continues to influence us as adults. Although new life experiences begin to shape us and those past aspects of the self inevitably fade with the passage of time, we can still ignite and reconnect with the childlike attitudes we carry deep at our core.

As human beings, we are on a lifelong journey of self-discovery. Re-discovering and re-connecting to our “true nature” is an enlightening and profound part of the human experience, and often the wisdom we seek can be found in our youth. The concept of “true nature” is the antithesis of the concept of the “ego”. “Ego” describes the sense of self that is constructed by the mind and social systems. Things like material possessions and social status cloud people’s perception of reality. “True nature,” on the other hand, conveys the idea of oneness with the universe, self realization, and the deep inner peace that people often awaken to.

The view that being “childish” is a negative trait is misguided, and emphasizes the need to get back in touch with ourselves. Connecting with yourself can, in turn, open the gates to connection with those around us and the universe.

What is the inner child?

The term “inner child” encompasses the memories, beliefs, emotions, and experiences from our childhood that continue to influence us as adults. Our relationships, with our environment and the people in our lives, at a young age create an identity that serves as the foundation for who we believe we are for the rest of our lives. The persona we solidify as children stays with us.

As children, we approached life through a lens of passionate and wonderous curiosity, and were unaffected by our perceived imposed limitations. We embraced ourselves and others without judgment and had limitless creativity. We prioritized play because enjoying life was far more important to us than conquering it — we can learn from ourselves and this mindset, rather than conforming to the capitalism idea of “adulting.”

The “inner child” does not just refer to childhood happiness. Though curiosity, creativity, and play are all positive aspects of the inner child, the inner child also carries the negative experiences and feelings we may have endured in early life that we have since subconsciously buried. As we grow up, we develop coping mechanisms to protect us from that negativity. It can cause us to shy away from our inner child.

Thus, connecting with your inner child produces twofold results: happiness and healing.

Healing your inner child

Traumas endured in early life are suppressed to our subconscious and are held by the “inner child.” So, healing inner child wounds helps us heal our present selves. The first step to healing your inner child is recognizing and validating your inner child’s feelings; acknowledge the pain and emotions that you experienced as a child, and validate them by giving yourself permission to feel. Crying is a really important factor in connecting with our inner child.

Identify your inner child’s unmet needs, such as the need for love, attention, validation, or safety. Then, find ways to fulfill them in your adult life. Nurture yourself and tend to your needs; treat yourself like someone you love, because you deserve it.

Give yourself the space and grace to heal. Healing takes time and mistakes are a part of the growth. Healing your inner child is a journey that takes patience, compassion, and commitment, so keep in mind that self care is vital and you should seek support if necessary. Healing has the potential to transform and improve your self-concept.

How do you connect to your inner child?

Anything blocking one’s ability to freely express their true nature, such as stress, fear, societal expectations, limiting beliefs, negative self-talk, and insecurity, inhibits them from bringing out their inner child. True nature refers to expressing one’s authentic way of being, without any walls up or fear of judgment. Essentially, connecting back to one’s inner child is connecting back to one’s true nature, or their unfiltered self. Children are more in tune with their true nature because they are far less influenced by the impositions of society — they live authentically and for themselves.

You don’t become one with yourself at the flip of a switch. Connecting to your inner child is a skill that you can develop over time by doing things like…

1. Cultivate a playful mindset! Play! Infuse playfulness into your way of being by making jokes, playing games, doing the things you loved to do as a child, or trying new things. Be curious, and never stop learning from the world around you.

2. Embrace creativity! Do art, express yourself creatively!

3. Practice non-judgment and selfcompassion. Judgment is a result of societally imposed conventions, nonjudgement is us reverting back to being kids when we didn’t have an ego. Self compassion entails self-care and self-love in a non-judgmental way.

4. Reconnect to nature – the idea of true nature is echoed again. Pure awe and wonder of the natural world is ignited when we are in nature.

5. Practice mindfulness/meditation –Take some time to sit quietly and focus on your breath or a calming image. This can help you connect with your inner self and cultivate a sense of inner peace. Be here now. Be present, be receptive, be open. Live with intention and live in the now.

6. Listen to music – Listen to music that you loved as a child or that reminds you of happy memories. This can help you access your emotions and connect with your inner child.

7. Journaling/self-reflection – Write about your memories and experiences from childhood, or write a letter to your younger self. This can help you tap into your inner child and process any unresolved emotions from your past.

Why is tapping into your inner child important?

Whether or not you are aware of it, the inner child is a fundamental emotional and psychological part of you. The pursuit of freeing the inner child requires patience and introspection, but leads to a deeper sense of self, allowing joy, creativity, and fulfillment to flow more easily into your life. Connecting with your inner child is a powerful tool for self-discovery and personal growth, as it allows us to heal subconscious wounds and enjoy life in a more authentic, joyful way. Most importantly, uncovering and honoring these aspects of ourselves expands our perspective of reality in a way that increases the compassion we have for ourselves and others.

Here’s a challenge – reflect on what you loved to do as a child, such as drawing, playing sports, or reading. Recall the thrill of chasing your friends in a game of tag, the satisfaction of making lanyards at summer camp, or the exhilaration of running through the sprinklers on a hot summer day. Whether it was playing video games, making “your mom” jokes, finger painting, throwing snowballs, building forts, or tapping someone on the shoulder then looking away. Sing, laugh, cry, explore. Do things that make you feel so beautifully human. Try to reconnect with yourself through these activities and see how they make you feel!