The Burr Magazine Spring 2021

Spring 2021

THEBURR.COM | 1

Contents

pg. 15 pg. 40

Small Business Central

pg. 18

Behind the Mask

Tree City pg. 44

Uhuru: BLM Moving Forward

pg. 24

pg. 53

Live from Kent, Ohio

Level Up

pg. 28

pg. 57

A Mag: Move Over Jeans

The People Who Kept the Lights On

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MEET THE STAFF Spring 2021Editorial Board

Sara Crawford Editor in Chief

Emma Greathouse Assistant Art Director

Annie Zwisler Managing EditorIde

Elliot Burr Art Director

Anna Lawrence Photo Editor

Peiyu Liu Assistant Photo Editor

Terry Lee III Blogger Senior Editor

Holly Liptak Writer Senior Editor

Augusta Battoclette Web Editor

Published with support of Kent State and the Kent Community. No part of The Burr Magazine may be reprinted or published without permission. © 2020 The Burr Magazine 330-672-2572 | theburrmagazine@gmail.com

4 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

Abigail Bottar Copy Desk Chief

Kaitlyn Finchler Social Media Director

Find past issues of The Burr Magazine online at https://issuu.com/theburr

WRITERS

PHOTOGRAPHERS/VIDEOGRAPHERS

Grace Marie Burton

Emma Fisher

Brie Camp

Hayley Vitale

Grace Christopher

CeeJay Scott (Photographer and Videographer)

Julia Duanetto De Sousa Lillianna DiFini

DESIGNERS

BLOGGERS

Jess Goodwin

Jenna Bal

Emily Aslanis

Molly Heideman

Taylor Gay

Keri Fabrizi

Maria McGinnis

Cassidy Gladiuex

Wesley Koogle

Sarah McGinnis

Kathryn Hudnell

Miranda Sepúlveda

Hope McGuire

Alyssa Lambo Shane McGinnis

ILLUSTRATORS

Nicole Salem

COPY EDITORS

Emily Aslanis

Sierra Severt

Emma Andrus

Paige Gaskins

Katie Flack

Abigail Pickens Preston Randall Miranda Sepúlveda

CONTRIBUTORS A MAGAZINE MODELS

UHURU MAGAZINE COLLAB

Emma Joffrion

Zaria Johnson

Brianna Keys

Maya Little

Kristal Moseley

SPECIAL THANKS TO Jacqueline Marino: Faculty Advisor Kevin Dilley: Student Media Director A Magazine Uhuru Magazine

STUDENT MEDIA STAFF Kevin Dilley Student Media Director

Norma Young Business Editor

Jenna Gobrecht Sales Manager

Lorie Bednar Office Manager THEBURR.COM | 5

Letter from the Editor Heading into 2020, we all joked that we had 20/20 vision and were looking forward to starting a new decade fresh — with new opportunities and new journeys. 2020 brought us quite the opposite, with fewer opportunities and being stuck inside our homes. When thinking of what we should include in our spring issue, there was the unavoidable. For the past year and on, we all needed to adapt our vision. We learned in new ways.

We stayed six feet apart from each other. We all experienced the world in a whole new way. We felt that it would be wrong not to address what we faced this past year, as we all went through it together in the most isolated way possible.

That is where our idea for this print issue came in. We wanted to create a time capsule, something for us to look back on and realize how crazy of a year it was. Not only have we experienced the COVID-19 pandemic, but throughout the summer, activism flooded the streets as the Black Lives Matter movement took over after the deaths of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor and countless others. As college students, we have not attended a regular class since March 2020 — now, we sit at our desks at home or at a designated spot in a classroom six feet apart with masks on and sanitizer in hand.

are impacted by the pandemic. At the same time, we look at the positives that we experienced. Stories like Molly Heideman’s teach us about embracing our small victories, and Terry Lee lll celebrates the untiring essential workers who kept the lights on. Throughout this issue, we want to tell a story.

Not any story but our story. The story of the small business owner struggling to stay open. The story of students struggling with online learning. The story of the introvert, who has had a year full of staying at home. The story of the activists, wanting to share their voices and create change.

As you leaf through this issue, I hope you are able to take a step back and reflect. I hope that through this issue, you are able to look back on the past year and remember not only the bad but the good that we all experienced.

SARA CRAWFORD editor-in-chief

In the following pages, we reflect on changes. Annie Zwisler reminds us of college freshmen who are currently living an entirely different freshman experience than the rest, and Grace Marie Burton discusses live music and how local artists

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Emma Fisher

Through the Lens In the past, Kent State's Esplanade was consistently busy.

There was not a moment throughout the day that there were no crowds of people walking down the path. You would have to continue to keep an eye out for sudden bikes, skateboards or just a straggler running to class.

Now, the busy-ness of the esplanade is no longer. As people attend class inside their rooms, there is no need to run from Eastway to White Hall on Front Campus. Now, the path remains bare, with only a few travelers taking it, rather than the hundreds that did just a year ago.

State of the University WORDS BY LILLIANNA DIFINI

MAY 4TH: ANNUAL TRIBUTE Each year, Kent State holds an annual memorial service for the events that occurred on May 4, 1970. Apart from learning about the events of May 4, staff and students take this day each year to remember the tragic affairs that ensued and the loss of four Kent Anna Lawrence

State students. This past year, Kent

THE ROCK

May 4, 1970 to pay tribute to those

State held its 50th commemoration of

Located on Hilltop Drive, the rock has

wounded and killed in the tragedy.

been a part of Kent State’s campus for decades and is the touchstone of campus expression. Typically, the rock has been painted for campus activities, welcome messages and fun depictions. Recently, offensive language aimed at Black stu-

The ceremony was planned to look Courtesy of Kent Stater/Cameron Aloway

THE 10-YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF THE LGBTQ+ CENTER

similar to past memorials, but as the COVID-19 pandemic affected Kent State, the 50th commemoration was hosted virtually and streamed via YouTube. This year’s plans to com-

dents was painted on the rock and to

The Kent State LGBTQ+ Center was devel-

memorate May 4 are currently unan-

ensure these events never occur again,

oped as a part of Kent State’s Student

nounced but may look similar to the

the university put into place new proce-

Services 10 years ago. Students from all

dures and policies which took effect Jan.

different colleges, majors, and groups are

11. Some of these restrictions include how

open to the LGBTQ+ Center. Not only is

long a painting is allowed to stay on the

the LGBTQ+ Center a safe space for all

rock, how much surface area is allowed to

students, but it provides a wide range of

be painted and the types of displays that

services, including career training and

are/are not permitted.

leadership development. Students can

50th.

Courtesy of Kent Stater/Kaitlyn Finchler

also use the LGBTQ+ Center to access information on how to be an ally. The center is a mutual place where students can share their identities, experiences and access resources related to their gender and/or sexual identity.

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TAKING IT BACK WORDS BY Abigail Bottar ILLUSTRATIONS BY Emily Aslanis and Emma Greathouse

MAY 04, 2020

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SEPT. 10, 2020

MAR. 10, 2020

KENT STATE SHUTDOWN In an email to the Kent State community, President Todd Diacon announced the cancellation of in-person classes starting at 4:25 p.m. with instructions to start remote learning on March 16 and plans for in-person classes to resume on April 13. The email strongly encouraged students to return home and advised against large gatherings and travel. Students would not return to campus until fall semester.

MAY 4 SHOOTING 50TH ANNIVERSARY Although all in-person events were canceled in March, dozens of people still came to campus to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the May 4 shootings. A smaller silent vigil took place to honor the lives lost.

The universit y hosted virtual events, including a tribute video and messages from several of the wounded students.

SEPT. 18, 2020

A Washington resident became the first confirmed case of COVID-19 in the United States after returning from Wuhan, China.

MAR. 22, 2020

JAN. 21, 2020

FIRST CASE OF COVID-19 IN THE U.S.

STAY-AT-HOME ORDER After a series of orders ranging from limiting mass gatherings to closing schools, then-acting Department of Health Director Amy Acton issued a stay-at-home order for the state of Ohio. The order stated that all nonessential businesses must close and limited travel and activities. The order’s expiration date was April 6, 2020, but it would remain in place until May 29.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg died at the age of 87 after serving for 27 years as an associate justice of the Supreme Court of the United States and fighting for women’s rights throughout her career.

ROCK PROTESTS After a tumultuous summer of protesting police brutality against the Black community, the Black Lives Matter movement came to Kent State’s campus. Hundreds of people gathered for a Black Lives Matter protest, just three days after the rock on Front Campus was vandalized with racist rhetoric. Protestors marched from in front of the Student Center to the rock with several speeches from student activists and organizations. The vandalism caused the university to consider removing the rock completely before ultimately deciding to install security cameras.

to where it all began

the 46th President of the United States, and the crowd that normally sprawls across the National Mall was replaced with flags from all 50fifty states. Notable moments included National Youth Poet Laureate Amanda Gorman’s captivating poem and former president Donald Trump becoming only the fourth president to not attend his predecessor’s inauguration.

U.S. SURPASSES HALF A MILLION COVID-19 DEATHS The White House ordered federal flags to fly at half-mast after the COVID-19 death toll surpassed half a million Americans. The virus has claimed more U.S. lives than World War I, World War II and the Vietnam War combined.

FEB. 22, 2020

DEC. 20, 2020

ALAN CANFORA Alan Canfora, one of nine students wounded in the May 4 shootings, died at the age of 71 from a brief illness unrelated to COVID-19. Canfora dedicated his life to studying and spreading awareness about May 4 and was integral to maintaining its legacy.

JAN. 20, 2020

DEC. 11, 2020

NOV. 03, 2020 ELECTION DAY After weeks of absentee and early voting, millions of Americans went to the polls to vote in local elections, state elections and, of course, the presidential election, although Joe Biden would not be declared the winner until November 7.

VACCINE APPROVED The Food and Drug Administration issued the first emergency use author izat ion for the P fizerBioNTech COVID-19 vaccine. This wa s soon to be followed by authorization for the Moderna vaccine on December 18. On February 27, the Janssen COVID-19 vaccine was authorized.

INAUGURATION DAY Millions of Americans tuned in from their homes to an inauguration unlike any other. Due to the pandemic, fewer people were witness to President Joe Biden’s swearing-in as

Courtesy of Emily Adorno

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LIFE IN QUARANTINE The trends that brought us together this past year WORDS BY Augusta Battoclette ILLUSTRATIONS BY Emma Greathouse

E

VERYONE HAS HANDLED THE LAST YEAR DIFFERENTLY. Maybe you started binge-watching a new series that is now your favorite comfort TV show. Maybe you picked up a new hobby that you never considered trying before.

We must adapt to a new normal while we continue weathering this storm, we must adapt to a new normal, whether that means baking bread, learning the latest TikTok dances or making whipped coffee.

Whatever you have been doing, we all have one thing in

The Burr asked the Kent State community, from students to alumni to local residents, to fill out a survey regarding what they did in quarantine. Here are the results:

common: quarantine has completely changed our lives.

It becomes easy to stay focused on the negatives — the continuous pandemic, the ever-rising number of cases, a lack of socializing — but, during this time, it is also important to focus on positives of the last year, even if they are few and far between for some.

DESCRIBE 2020 IN ONE WORD:

HAVE YOU BAKED HOMEMADE BREAD?

HAVE YOU ATTEMPTED ANY TIKTOK DANCE TRENDS?

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HAVE YOU PARTICIPATED IN ANY OTHER INTERNET TRENDS?

WHAT SHOWS HAVE YOU BINGE– WATCHED IN 2020?

1. Grey’s Anatomy 2. Tiger King: Murder, Mayhem and Madness 3. New Girl 4. Bridgerton 5. Avatar: The Last Airbender

2021 is a new year filled with hope for many in countless different ways, but a few themes stuck out among respondants for what they hope to accomplish this year.

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W

HEN THE COVID-19 PANDEMIC FORCED EVERYONE TO SHIFT TO. working, learning and living life remotely, it was hard for some people to make the adjustment. Those who were normally used to being surrounded by other people needed to adjust to enjoying the company of just their pets and house plants.

Leaving the hustle and bustle of in-person meetings, handshakes, dinners and small talk sounds like every introvert’s dream. Come to find out, the sense of isolation accompanying the pandemic affected everyone — whether introverted or not — in similar ways.

Responses were collected from Kent State students via Google Forms.

o r a Ye 12 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

I e h ft The

t r e v o r t n

e t zon r o f om ble c a IS t r o f GINN m C o M c A L un MARI NDAL most N RA DS BY ILLUS

ESTO WOR

BY PR S N IO TRAT

TELL US HOW YOU'VE BEEN DOING DURING THIS TIME OF BEING REMOTE. WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN FEELING? “At first, it was exciting. I was thrilled that I no longer had to leave my room to go to class. I think most people were.

But now, I am really struggling. I’ve burnt out at the third week mark where I usually survive until at least halfway through the semester. Even as an introvert, I feel that I am lacking in human connection. I miss having like-minded people around me and being able to discuss things I’m interested in. I try and focus on different hobbies (playing guitar, writing, reading) but nothing sticks. It’s hard to focus during all of this. Definitely not the ideal environment for learning.”

ANYTHING ELSE YOU WOULD LIKE TO TELL US ABOUT BEING AN INTROVERT OR YOUR THOUGHTS ON BEING REMOTE? “I’ve never been much of a people person, but even this is too much for me. I love being alone, but not for months at a time. Maybe I’m a phony introvert, but this can’t be good for anyone’s mental health. If there are other people out there thriving because of this, I definitely commend them.

I wish I could pick their brains.”

ISABELLA KAUFMAN SOPHOMORE, EARLY CHILDHOOD EDUCATION MAJOR

TELL US HOW YOU'VE BEEN DOING DURING THIS TIME OF BEING REMOTE. WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN FEELING? “At first, things were normal. I would be in my room doing work and watching videos, but things just kept getting worse and worse. While I was never one to go outside, the option was always nice. Even though I didn’t go out with friends often, whenever I did, it was wonderful. Now being forced to stay inside, especially with those who don’t like it, makes things worse. Overall, I think I’ll spend more time outdoors.”

JASON HENRIQUEZ-AYALA

IS THERE ANYTHING YOU MISS ABOUT BEING IN PERSON? “Yes, I miss pretty much everything. I miss the class dynamics, the conviviality of the classroom, the hands-on teaching and the ability to have discussions. The online classroom feels at times incredibly impersonal and is not conducive to the kind of learning I’ve become accustomed to.”

ANYTHING ELSE YOU'D LIKE TO TELL US ABOUT BEING AN INTROVERT OR YOUR THOUGHTS ON BEING REMOTE? “My mom always said me and her were both extroverted introverts. We thrive with our friends but also cherish time alone. Being able to be alone as much as I want has been nice, but I miss the world outside my room incredibly.”

MICHAEL SNYDER SOPHOMORE, FRENCH MAJOR

TELL US HOW YOU'VE BEEN DOING DURING THIS TIME OF BEING REMOTE. WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN FEELING? “Being remote has been really hard for me academically.

Doing remote learning and having to self teach a bit is difficult for me. I need the in-person interactions with my professors to understand the content and ask questions right away to better understand the content. But socially, it has been difficult as well but also a little relieving. I love going out and do miss that. But I feel more recharged staying home and being in my own space.”

ANYTHING ELSE YOU'D LIKE TO TELL US ABOUT BEING AN INTROVERT OR YOUR THOUGHTS ON BEING REMOTE?

“Being an introvert and remote should go hand in hand, but they actually don’t. People need some type of human interaction, no matter how much of an introvert you are, to live.

Communicating with people is a part of life, especially in person. Not having that in-person social interaction harms people, because it decreases our communication skills to build relationships to get a job/do well in interviews, make new friends, professional connections, etc. ”

FRESHMAN, PHOTOGRAPHY SARITA KUNDE SENIOR, VISUAL COMMUNICATION DESIGN MAJOR

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WORDS BY Brie Camp ILLUSTRATION BY Elliot Burr

A WORKER ME A buzzing never-ending.

They live brief lives, Backs never breaking Under large loads they carry.

We are all bees, you and me.

Those seem-less things rule over us as Lords of fate. We are ensnared by craze, Why can’t you see it? Hexed into that maze.

Amazing is it not? Ceaselessly waking buried.

Bound to responsibility as flowers are bound to their petals.

As bees are to wings, As humanity is to those waking hours.

Mars was pater, mother was a friend.

Carelessness my brother and sister crude youth did lend.

We were a garden budding with thorny thistles.

Our inheritance begot blatant stares; missiles of apprehension The home of hurricanes and drought concurrent I endured there within and without that apparitional tyrant And the story concludes in jaunty formlessness ... the years behind me I have left.

Instantaneous - life ends and means little Honey sweet and bitter as daybreak ensuing sensual darkness That light life’s meaningless meaning dawns.

Another morning peeks in through windows drawn.

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Small Business Central: A Peek into Downtown Kent After a large dip in sales, business begins to pick up again

WORDS BY JULIA DUANETTO DE SOUSA & KAITLYN FINCHLER PHOTOS BY HAYLEY VITALE

I

N 2020, COVID-19 ESCALATED WITH. alarming speeds, infected masses and halted the economy. Small business owners needed to change their usual course of action to keep their businesses going, working at limited capacity or shutting down entirely. This made it harder to adjust to continuously changing health and safety standards and somewhat restructuring how their businesses operate overall.

FRANKLIN SQUARE DELI

chips and a pickle, you might want to stop at Franklin Square Deli has many fresh and delicious menu items to offer to get you through the day.

Franklin Square Deli has been in historic downtown Kent since 1983. Located on the corner of Water and Main Street, the menu’s essence is fresh, “cut to order” sandwiches, made in the customer’s view.

For 38 years, they have created new sandwich recipes while their classics remain unchanged.

geared up for that type of transition into all carry out,” Picelle says. “Then it went to partial dining which helped, but we’re doing good [and the] community stepped up very strongly.”

WOODSY’S MUSIC In 1972, Woodsy’s Music opened as a small instrument repair shop in downtown Kent, now Northeast Ohio’s largest “independent, family-owned and operated music store.”

If you are ever craving a deli sandwich with Owner Carl Picelle says that the numbers from pre-pandemic to now are not comparable, and they are “clinging on with our fingernails trying to make sure that we can get through the next phase of life.”

They have not closed during the pandemic and say that without the pandemic, they are usually at about 60% carry-out and 40% dine-in customers.

“The idea came, because there were no people around to do instrument repair,” owner Paul Braden says. “Back then, products were not easy to find, so we decided we would go into getting some gear for people to purchase.”

Instrument repair has been their speciality over the years, but they also offer music lessons. At the start of the pandemic, half of the students went online, and the other half quit. Braden says that the pandemic challenged them with the amount of people on staff they have.

“We were already pretty much

By Hayley Vitale. Table of a customer at Franklin Square Deli pictured; a tray of food, hat, drink and coat. Placed near the window of the store.

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“When the pandemic hit we didn’t see anybody, and that was quite a challenge, because we have 25 people that work here full-time, and we pay benefits and a living wage,” Braden says. “It struck us hard.”

The shop also works with concert touring and concert sound systems and installations. That was another facet of business they disconnected with for the time being.

Woodsy’s Music is Braden’s only source of income, and they closed for two months in the beginning of the pandemic.

They started an online store over 15 years ago, but it recently grew as people were at home looking for something to do while they were out of work. Learning an instrument, starting a podcast and other activities people sought after during lockdowns made a difference in sales, which are now only starting to pick up. The shop had to hire in an

“Since the revitalization of Kent, we had a lot of pedestrian traffic. The town was more vibrant, there were more students coming in, more people walking around,” Karen says.

“Once COVID hit it was totally different. We shut down for two months.”

While having no online stores to stay true to their oldschool approach, City Bank Antiques made no sales for the two months.

“Our inventory is different than most inventories in the retail world,” Karen says.

They offer a unique collection, and they put trust in people walking into the store. The store is Karen’s only source of income. However, her husband has another source of income, the financial group located right above the antique shop.

The majority of their customers come from out of town, but Karen says this has dropped off after reopening.

“We were doing appointments [for repairs], but people weren’t really coming in, because everyone was uncertain of what was going on.”

In concerns to COVID-19, Karen says that they haven’t had many issues with customers or procedures not following COVID-19 guidelines, but sometimes time can be an issue to factor in.

By Hayley Vitale. Photo taken outside Erie St. Kitchen, on the corner of W. Erie St. and Franklin Ave. including the Venice sign on the restaurant.

extra employee to help the physical store become covidfriendly. With the extra person, they are able to adequately clean the store.

“The only problem we have is when customers stay in the shop for too long. They love to browse; they stay here 45 minutes to one hour sometimes. That’s where we have a little bit of a problem,” Karen says. “Sales are OK; in our line of work it has been difficult anyway. People don’t collect as they used to.”

RAY’S PLACE In 1937, Ray Salvador opened a restaurant on a little brick road downtown known as Ray’s Place. Three owners later,

Regarding customers not obliging to COVID guidelines, Braden says there are some, but the staff tells them to mask up and social distance.

“People are excited to get back out and listen to live music [and] do a variety of entertainment,” Paul Braden says.

“When things get back, we feel like things will explode.”

CITY BANK ANTIQUES In July 1995, City Bank Antiques was opened by Karen and Don Barrett in the historical 1911 City Bank building in Kent.

The Barretts established their business focusing primarily on antiques such as books, pocket watches, vintage jewelry and repairs.

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By Kaitlyn Finchler. Customers shop inside of City Bank Antiques, looking inside of their glass cases.

Charlie Thomas has owned the business for over 43 years, and they serve everything from alcoholic beverages to Reubens to the famous “Mofo” burger.

Ray’s is a tavern-style restaurant where locals and Kent State students and faculty come to dine. Thomas says that the pandemic forcing them to do carry-out only for a period of time decreased their sales by a hefty amount.

“There’s a different cost factor, because now you’re putting everything in to-go containers, and that’s a caution we never had before,” Thomas says.

As far as following the COVID-19 guidelines, Thomas says that Ray’s adapted quickly, and was very cautious from the start.

“We set out a policy, and we followed it, and we still do, and we will until the governor really lessens his restrictions,” Thomas says. “We just follow the guidelines, and we don’t put ketchup bottles on the table, we bring containers, ... we have a mask mandate and we have a distance mandate, all that.”

they are not experiencing much of a decrease in sales, only about 20%. They minimized the hours they are open for dine-in, so most of their income comes from carry-out orders.

“We actually schedule [carry-out orders] almost like a reservation,” Crowe says. “When you call we tell you what time you can pick it up, so we try to make sure we don’t flood the kitchen by trying to eat at 6:00. We space time; the later you call in the harder it is to finance, like a busy restaurant.”

A lot of their business comes from locals. Crowe says they lost a lot of their business when the Kent Stage closed.

“I’d love to have the Kent Stage open, because we get a lot of their customers for concerts and whatnot, sporting events and you know, that counts they were more important to me,” Crowe says.

One of the COVID-19 precautions they are taking is putting any cash they get in a bleach solution before it gets put into the register.

Thomas is hopeful for more business as the restaurant has been open at half capacity, with groups no larger than 10.

“Money is dirty, all money is very dirty, so we sterilize it coming in [and] with it going back out as clean,” Crowe says.

“As we get warmer weather outside and the windows open, I think it’ll get better,” Thomas says. “People feel more comfortable. I think as we get more shots, vaccines and I think as we get into the fall, we’ll see market improvement.”

Crowe says he is grateful for the loyal customers, and throughout the pandemic, people have been buying meals after cooking at home for the week.

ERIE STREET KITCHEN When people think of Southern Creole food, Kent does not always come to mind, but Erie Street Kitchen wants to change that. Owner Jeff Crowe and his staff bring a selection of delicacies to the menu including southern fried chicken, lobster rolls, crab cakes and more.

“People having home cooking fatigue has helped us a lot when you know you’ve already made dinner and cooked over three times, you’re ready for some food.”

Julia Duanetto De Sousa | jduanett@kent.edu Kaitlyn Finchler | kfinchle@kent.edu

As far as their business during the pandemic, Crowe says

By Hayley Vitale. Back entrance of Woody’s Music.

Photo Courtesy of The Kent Stater. Shown is the MoFo Burger, Ray’s Place’s famous burger.

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Behind the Mask What is the emotion behind the mask?

WORDS BY Annie Zwisler PHOTOS BY Peiyu Liu

N

EARLY A YEAR HAS PASSED SINCE PARTICIPATING in many day-to-day activities like going out to eat, meeting up with friends and going to work or school became privileges of the past. These mundane parts of life were completely turned upside down, as the COVID-19 pandemic swept through the world. As people tried to navigate through the panic and the worry, a singular piece of cloth became the most sought-after piece of fashion: a mask. .

Soon, the faces we would meet and greet every day were safely hidden under a soft suit of armor, acting as a symbol of care and consideration for loved ones, neighbors and the essential workers that brave the virus in order for the world to retain the semblance of normalcy that remained. With medical

Thousands of people lost their jobs due to the pandemic. Many industries were unable to conduct business online, while others shortened their staffs to keep the risk of getting COVID-19 low. Unemployment reached an all-time high as those working in restaurants, bars and retail stores were laid off. People applied to receive unemployment checks in order to keep their families afloat and their bills paid.

18 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

masks being in such short supply, the creatives began churning out homemade masks for their communities. Some even turned mask-making into a business, benefiting those on the front lines and ensuring there were enough masks to go around. Different patterns, styles and designs of masks became the way people would introduce themselves to the world, simply because their faces could not. Behind every mask, there remains a person, an individual story, an emotion that lingers as the pandemic continues into another year. How the pandemic has affected everyone is different, but one thing is still the same: there will always be a story behind the mask.

There was so much, yet so little, to do when shutdowns were put in place, and everyone was forced to stay home. Students of all ages were grateful to have time off of school and homework, even if it meant being unable to leave their homes. Many enjoyed simply having time to themselves and being able to reconnect with old hobbies or pick up new ones.

Many used quarantine to spend a little more time with themselves. “Self-care” became a household term, where people would make sure to check in with their mental health a little more every day.

Whether this is through reading, exercise, eating good food or just sleeping in, the practice of self-care has grown into an intricate part of finding out who we are.

Connecting on social media became pivotal to keeping in touch with others during the pandemic. The internet became the main place where people could donate to charities, raise awareness about social issues or create content just to brighten someone’s day. Group Zoom hangouts or virtual game nights grew popular as a way to hang out with friends without breaking stay-at-home orders.

Education and learning both developed a whole new definition as the pandemic continued into this past fall. Many schools and colleges decided to continue using online learning through different classroom mediums as a way to teach and conduct school without risking a potential superspreader event. Students in classes that are in person sit masked, six feet apart, ready to learn.

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It’s the little things Embracing the everyday during challenging times

WORDS BY Molly Heideman ILLUSTRATION BY Paige Gaskins

O

N JAN. 19, 2020, THE FIRST CASE OF COVID-19 was reported in the United States. Life as we knew it was put on pause. By Feb. 22, 2021, 500,000 Americans died from the virus.

Our mothers, fathers, grandparents, siblings, friends — time after time, we wonder how we let the pandemic get this bad, how we let it rob our loved ones of more time. Finding joy in life began to feel like a fruitless voyage in a choppy sea.

But as humans, it is in our nature to try to find the light at the end of the tunnel.

And that is exactly what we did.

Finding the joy in small victories brought hope and confidence to us during challenging times. If we could try and focus on the good, we could get through anything.

Enjoying the little things became something thoughtful for those who struggled to grapple with the challenges that came along with the pandemic. Licensed therapist Holly Timberlake says appreciating the small things allows us to build resilience and gratitude towards ourselves and others.

“Being able to … let ourselves be affected by the small victories … can motivate us to feel more empowered to continue to develop our resilience and find a positive way to

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navigate through challenges,” Timberlake says.

Developing positive self-talk can greatly improve one’s mental health. Timberlake says focusing on not minimizing our accomplishments can allow us to appreciate ourselves more.

“If we’re also doing things like minimizing and devaluing ourselves … then the other thing that is going along with that is that we probably have a tendency to judge ourselves and to sort of kind of beat up on ourselves,” Timberlake says. “And the more we do that, then the less benefit we’re going to get from these small victories and the harder it’s going to be to actually propel ourselves to stretch to do things that are small victories.”

If you get caught up in negative thinking patterns, Timberlake recommends taking steps to learn to talk more positively to yourself and be more empathetic.

“People can often very easily call themselves stupid or dumb,” Timberlake says. “And so when we recognize that we’re doing that to stop and, you know, kind of apologize to ourselves and say, ‘It’s OK, I realize that I’m doing the best I can.’”

Even Timberlake has recognized her own small victories during the pandemic.

She says while these times may be stressful and unpredictable, it is important to not give into fear and let it be consuming. Building resilience is key to maintaining relationships with others and yourself, especially when challenges arise.

“Being able to … let ourselves be affected by the small victories … can motivate us to feel more empowered to continue to develop our resilience and find a positive way to navigate through challenges.”

HOLLY TIMBERLAKE

“Resilience is not just surviving,” Timberlake says. “It’s about really building strength, it’s about learning how to thrive and challenge. The idea of radiance gives you this sense of becoming more alive through challenges.”

As challenging as online school can be, students at Kent State found a way to find pride in themselves and give themselves credit for all the work they did. Madelyn Kist, a senior biochemistry major, was in the middle of the spring semester of her junior year when school shut down in March. She was forced to quickly move out of her Eastway dorm back home where she needed to learn how to do her work from home, especially her labs.

“I was in two chemistry labs, and they had no idea how to put that online,” Kist says. “So a lot of our final projects and everything, we just kind of had to improvise as to how we were going to do them.”

Switching to online school was stressful for Kist, but she tried to put things into perspective for herself to manage. “[The switch to online school] was definitely overwhelming at first, but then I realized that most, if not everybody else, was going through the same thing too,” Kist says.

Despite her mom being out of work when the pandemic started, Kist and her family stayed supportive of one another through the stressful time.

On top of managing online school, Kist knew application deadlines for PhD programs were rapidly approaching.

Since funding was cut to many universities, she was concerned that the chemistry degree she was applying for, which is typically fully funded, would cause a financial strain on her.

“My friend and I, we are both applying this cycle, and we have both gotten some acceptances so far, which is really exciting,” Kist says. “PhD programs, most of them in chemistry are fully funded, so you get a tuition waiver and a scholarship. But with the pandemic, some of the funding has been compromised, so it’s been tough finding programs that will support us both mentally and financially.”

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“This is kind of a unique situation that everybody is going through, so reaching out I think is a lot easier, even if it’s a personal crisis or a personal trauma, because everybody’s going to understand.”

MADELYN KIST

Kist’s biggest victory from the pandemic was applying to PhD programs and getting multiple acceptances to different universities. After long consideration, Kist landed on George Mason University for her doctoral degree.

“I think [the pandemic] definitely taught me some resilience,” Kist says. “I will be teaching some chemistry labs on my own, as well, once I start my PhD, and I think that having all of these virtual labs and virtual lectures that has actually taught us a lot about what we can and can’t do.”

For students like sophomore ASL interpreting major Abbey Moran, having a strong support system helped her keep focused and happy despite the major adjustments of moving back home to Toledo from her dorm.

“I am definitely proud of my friends and the group that we’ve made,” Moran says. “We’re really tight knit … it’s nice to be content with the people that you’re around. I know college can be hard where you jump around a lot of groups, but having a solid group of people in a hard time is, I think, definitely something to be proud of.”

When the pandemic started, Moran’s freshman experience was cut short, forcing her to cut involvement from the student groups she was a part of, like the downtown production of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.” She had to leave her friends at school and make a new adjustment to living at home, which she said was challenging at first, but her friends helped her get through it.

“We’ve been able to keep in touch as a group. We’ve been doing monthly get togethers so that we all have someone to talk to. We enjoy watching the show, keeping up spirits, keeping everybody together mental health-wise and just checking in on each other like a family,” Moran says.

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Moran thinks her biggest small victory last year was her involvement with the Black Lives Matter movement and having the voices of the disenfranchised heard. She attended local marches and protests and shared educational resources online.

“It really lets people sit in how their neighbors feel,” Moran says. “Hearing everybody’s experience, it’s a little bit easier to just share certain kinds of news and really making progress in that area, I think, is really important.”

Despite the challenges of the last year, having these small victories and little joys brought out the good when things got tough.

“This is kind of a unique situation that everybody is going through, so reaching out, I think, is a lot easier, even if it’s a personal crisis or a personal trauma, because everybody’s going to understand,” Kist says.

Taking time to appreciate the small victories and lean into yourself can change your outlook on life. The little things are what make us feel alive, whether we notice it or not.

Timberlake says cherishing those small victories is transformative.

“It’s absolutely transformative to be able to start supporting ourselves inside, rather than criticizing and attacking ourselves,” Timberlake says. “The more we can do that, the more we can transform our lives and have a kind of power and authenticity and presence that is not possible when we are coming from fear.”

Molly Heideman | mheidema@kent.edu

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This is Craig Johnson or “C-Spoke”. Craig is a sophmore, in this photo he is explaining his process of creating music during COVID. Photo by CeeJay Scott

LIVE FROM KENT, OHIO Local musicians play on despite the disappearance of live shows

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WORDS BY Grace Marie Burton PHOTOS BY CeeJay Scott and Grace Marie Burton

P

ICTURE THIS, YOU ARE A MUSICIAN. You have worked tirelessly on a project for months and months. The energy you have put into your work is now translating into excitement for others to hear it. Then all of a sudden, a once-in-a-generation catastrophe. Instead of being in a career progression, you find yourself stalled inside your home for the next year, unable to make money off your creation.

Many musicians began to panic with the dawn of COVID-19 in the spring of last year. With the digital media age of streaming music, the primary method for artists to make money is via touring and playing live. More established musicians might have an easier time weathering a year without touring, but independent musicians depend on touring and day jobs for their survival. COVID-19 might have created more time for them to work on their music than they might have had otherwise, but it is still affecting them negatively. The local music scene in Kent experienced this aggressive halt firsthand. Kent’s music scene often combines with Akron’s scene, making a 17-mile-wide pool of all sorts of artists and venues.

One of the most well-known venues is the It’s a Kling Thing!

House, located near downtown Akron. The Kling Thing venue opened in 2007, with Tyler Brown taking over in 2013. Brown’s been the curator of countless shows of national and international bands since then. He not only books bands to come to play in the tiny basement of the house, but he has also been a host, musician, networker and worn countless other hats that come with owning a nonprofit venue. When COVID-19 started, Brown was an eyewitness to this rapid annulment of shows.

“We had some pretty big shows in the works. I had one in April, and there were well over a hundred people that were going to come to the show. It was going to be just a ridiculous show and, sadly, we had to cancel it of course due to the coronavirus,” he says.

Along with having to cancel shows, Brown also found difficulty within his own personal music projects, the biggest one being his band: Ghost Slime.

“Once corona hit, everybody was worried about practicing with one another and hanging out with one another ... our friend worked in a grocery store ... he just shut himself away and didn’t want to hang out with or affect any of us,” he says.

“It was kind of a similar thing where practicing with your friends, you’re like, ‘Oh, should we right now? I don’t know if we are gonna affect one another and cause something bad to happen,’ I kind of stopped practicing, stopped doing everything.”

Since artists cannot tour on their upcoming projects, a lot of them chose to instead sit on the projects until touring becomes safe. Many creatives finding themselves in these predicaments started their own projects to keep the creative muscle firm and strong. Brown is no different, making his own solo project during quarantine entitled “Life’s a Gas.” “So when I do music stuff, I can’t practice with anybody right now, I’m just going to wing it and make my own music and see what happens. I was just basically messing around, and then I figured it out,” Brown says. “Just playing around, I discovered I could make music another way. It’s kind of forced

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𝄞𝄞

me to be creative in different ways because I don’t know if I ever would have done it if coronavirus wouldn’t have happened.”

Jordan King, a member of the Kent band Swell Tides, was in a similar situation. In March of last year, nine days before Ohio entered lockdown, Swell Tides released a split EP with Akron band Roid Rage. In celebration of the release, the groups planned a release show.

“We were going to do a big release gig with two drummers in both bands [and] three saxophone players,” King says.

After the show was canceled, King found himself missing playing music with others and experiencing slight anxiety over his creative process.

“The big thing I miss is jamming with people, you know, that’s the big thing, just kind of carelessly getting together with people and drinking some beers and just jamming. That’s kind of just not happening right now.”

This is not an uncommon feeling for people involved with the creative arts; COVID19 created a lot of free time for artists to create, but has also birthed numerous anxieties for everybody living through it. Writer Madeleine E. Vaughan summarized it perfectly in an article entitled “Being Creative During Quarantine.”

“For those who are capable of creating to a professional level, they have the added pressure of usually having a vocation related to their art,” Vaughan writes. “Perhaps it’s a full-time job ... the point is that their art is intrinsically connected with work.

They can’t draw or write for pleasure, because if they’re drawing or writing, they should be working!”

This, along with the market of social media which forces creative-types to be constantly posting their work for free, can lead to creative burnout for anybody.

Add a global pandemic on top, and it is a recipe for a severe lack of creativity. For musicians, making music is only half of the process of being an artist. Performing live is the other half that completes that circle.

While Brown and King had some experience performing live under their belts, other musicians found the progress of their careers halted. Craig Johnson, a Kent State student who performs under the name C-Spoke, has been creating music since he started college. Johnson says the lockdown actually improved the spread and engagement with his debut EP as well as his creative process in general.

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Basement stage of the It’s a Kling Thing! House venue in Akron, OH. Photo by Grace Marie Burton.

“Just because music now is digital, so it’s still easier to spread it. Actually, the start of COVID helped my music get out to more people because everybody was in the house. Naturally, more people were just looking for music to listen to, so it helped me a lot in that sense,” Johnson says. “With the extra free time, it actually allowed me to focus on my craft more, which was good for me since I didn’t have to worry about everything else that I used [to].”

It is difficult to see the future of music from here; the handful of vaccines are being distributed to the nation’s most vulnerable and things are slowly being reopened. Compared to when lockdown started, progress has finally begun. While music is not the highest priority on the list of COVID-19 issues, it is an important part of the fabric of society that will make its return when the time is right.

Despite this, Johnson also expresses the faults COVID-19 has stamped into his performance chances.

“I would love to try to perform at the school at some point.

That’s the only thing where I would say COVID messed me up,” Johnson says.

GRACE MARIE BURTON | gdavies1@kent.edu

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Move Over Jeans, It’s JOGGERS’ TIME TO SHINE

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On Kristal: Adidas hoodie, Forever 21 leggings and Adidas Superstar Sneakers.

IN COLLABORATION WITH A MAGAZINE

WORDS BY Maria McGinnis PHOTOS BY CeeJay Scott

T

AKE A SECOND AND THINK BACK TO. In recent years, athleisure brands like January of 2020. You are waking up in Lululemon and Athleta gained popularity, reigthe morning and getting ready for niting the trend. school or work and picking out your clothes.

Maybe it is a formal day that calls for slacks and When the COVID-19 pandemic forced people to a blazer, or maybe you are reaching for your adopt a remote lifestyle, athleisure became a favorite jeans and a nice blouse. Whatever the go-to trend once again. According to reporting dress code, joggers, leggings and cropped from Sourcing Journal, the United States’ athhoodies probably did not come to mind. leisure market was valued at $155.2 billion in 2018 and is expected to reach $257.1 billion by But what are you wearing right now?

2026.

Athleisure boomed in the 2000s when social- Sales of suits, dress shirts, dress pants and ites like Paris Hilton made tracksuits stylish. dresses were all down more than 50% from

March through July of 2020 compared to that same period in 2019, according to reporting from CBS News. With a large chunk of the population working from home, the need for formal or even business casual attire has significantly decreased, making way for leggings, sweatshirts and running shoes.

Not only is remote work impacting the way consumers dress and the clothes they shop for, but it is also impacting general remote living. With gyms closed for several months at the beginning of the pandemic and some people still feeling uncomfortable leaving the house unless

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On Brianna: Vest, top and bottoms from SHEIN and Nike Airquents.

absolutely necessary, home workouts have been on the rise, and it is not advised to work out in dress pants.

While the pandemic will eventually come to pass, it seems athleisure may be here to stay. There will be lasting effects on people’s personal and work lives, as some companies are choosing to continue hiring remote employees, which inevitably affects how they will be dressing to clock in.

Fashion history tells us trends can change on a dime. Experts can forecast all they want but sometimes unexpected things, like a global pandemic, can throw those predictions for a massive loop. Who knows how long athleisure will bask in the spotlight or what trend will come next? For now, throw on a sherpa half-zip, a pair of high-rise leggings and enjoy it while it lasts.

Maria McGinnis | mmcginn9@kent.edu

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On Emma: I.AM.GIA sweatsuit, Forever 21 puffer suit, Jeffrey Campbell Fader Platform Sneaker, and rings by Emma Joffrion.

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2024 Class of 2020 Freshman students struggle to find a new normal WORDS BY Annie Zwisler ILLUSTRATION BY Miranda Sepúlveda PHOTOS BY Emma Fisher

K

AT Y GARDUÑO WALKS DOWN THE KE NT Esplanade. She treks through the deserted campus, the only noises being the soft echo of the wind between buildings and the occasional masked student finding their way across the quad. She steps down the staircase next to Franklin Hall, pushes the crosswalk button and continues down the sidewalk to Chipotle, her new job for the fall semester. Garduño ended her high school career at the beginning of a global pandemic, and she will end her first year of college exactly how she began it.

world. Some colleges, like Kent State, invited students to return for on-campus living but limited the amount of in-person classes that could take place day-to-day. The university also made sure to adjust dining areas, common areas and study rooms such as the library to ensure that students could be kept socially distanced. The limitations set by Kent State allowed for there to be a safer environment on campus, but the lack of people and community present fell short of many freshmen students’ expectations for campus life.

This past year was anything but normal due to COVID-19.

From major hospitalizations, mask mandates and event cancellations, the way that people interact and communicate with each other day to day has changed forever. These changes affected all kinds of demographics on a mass scale — especially college students.

“I definitely was expecting to meet a lot more people than I did on campus. It felt so empty at the beginning, because, I mean, it was empty,” Garduño says. “And I remember when my mom came here for grad school. There were so many people everywhere. It just felt weird, and it felt bare, and it felt kind of eerie.”

Garduño, a freshman psychology major from Stow, planned to star in her high school production of “Guys and Dolls” early last year. The show was gearing up for its tech week rehearsal when the pandemic forced the closure of all in-person schools.

Most college students have now experienced almost an entire year of online school. For seniors, this change to online learning will soon come to a close, while juniors and sophomores cross their fingers in hopes that the remainder of their college experience can be salvaged. Freshmen, however, have not yet been exposed to the college life that so many look forward to. They missed monumental experiences that came before college, like prom, graduation and move-in day. Still, college experiences for freshmen have to be put on hold as they attempt to start a new normal through online learning. These changes often make students more stressed and distanced from their peers and professors and constructed more barriers to education than ever before.

“We found out I think three weeks before we were going to be having tech rehearsals that we were going to be going on break, and they were considering postponing it. And then they just completely canceled it,” Garduño says. “And then slowly, more and more things started getting canceled. I think it was just [that] I was mostly in shock and confused because everyone in the world was getting blindsided all at once. It was just a really confusing and stressful time for everyone.”

The confusion and stress remained as newly-graduated seniors became incoming freshmen to colleges all over the

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Ella Donovan, a freshman exploratory major from Apex, North Carolina, chose to attend Kent State for her undergraduate degree last spring. She experienced many

unexpected shifts during this past year, but ultimately tried to get ahead of the curve.

“I think you just have to be a little bit more proactive with finding classes to help you decide on a major ... Last semester, I took the [First Year Experience] course, and this semester, I’m taking career navigation. So I think you definitely have to take an extra step to really help you decide what you want to do,” says Donovan.

As colleges struggled to reopen in August, COVID-19 cases rose rapidly. Students disregarded social distancing rules causing surges and campus shutdowns. At Kent State, on-campus dining options were severely limited. Prentice Hall permanently closed, and sit-in dining was restricted.

Students like Donovan, who decided to attend Kent State in-person from a different state, needed to improvise new ways to make friends or rely on the old ones.

“I think there’s a little added difficulty, especially for the kids coming from out of state, because you kind of don’t really know many people. I was very fortunate, because my cousin goes here, and I have a couple of friends from Ohio that go here,” Donovan says. “I was able to hang out with people when I first got here, but for those other kids that are coming from out of state, it’s pretty hard with all of the classes being online. There’s just not a lot of interaction.”

The pandemic heavily influenced how on-campus organizations and groups functioned. Many performing arts groups, musical theater shows and dance competitions suspended meetings or moved online in order to keep people safe. For Donovan, campus clubs being unable to meet in person made it more difficult to join any at all.

really many people were meeting up. And this semester, I tried to join the guitar club. I haven’t heard back from them yet,” Donovan says.

Garduño dreamed about joining one of Kent State’s a cappella groups, Vocal Intensity, ever since they visited her high school. They encouraged her to audition after she started college, assuring that she would be a welcomed addition to the group. However, COVID-19 made it difficult for the group to get together and pushed back Garduño’s opportunity to join.

“I was looking forward to that, and then it didn’t happen, which was kind of disappointing. And then I asked my friend if they were going to be doing anything this semester and she said probably not,” Garduño says.

COVID-19 even caused some freshmen college students to change their college plans completely. Many freshmen decided to continue living at home for the school year until it was safe enough to move into a dorm or apartment with a roommate, where social distancing was more difficult to occur.

16% of college students chose to take a gap year while 44% switched to a different four-year university, according to a survey done by CollegeData.com. Students had a plethora of reasons why they chose to change their original college plans, including financial insecurity, the difficulty of online learning and being far from home.

“I actually was talking to this girl online from Michigan, and she planned to room with me but ended up staying back in Michigan because all the classes were online, so I don’t have a roommate,” Donavan says.

“I’ve tried to join a couple of clubs, but last semester not

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“My favorite place to study on campus since last semester has been the lower level of DI Hub. I was at home last semester and I discovered DI Hub by accident while on a walk, ever since then it has been my favorite place to eat and study.”

-Emma Fisher, Freshman

Garduño experienced the same issue with a friend she planned on rooming with, causing her to rely on the university to match her with someone she did not know.

The housing department was completely understanding of her situation and quickly helped to help find a roommate to fit Garduño’s situation.

“It was completely by chance, because I am in the Honors College. When I found out that I wasn’t going to be rooming with my friend I called into the housing department, and I was like, ‘Is there any way you can move me into Stopher-Johnson? I don’t want to have a floor bathroom if I don’t have to.’ And they were like, ‘Yeah, we have some places open. You can room with this person.’ I was really happy because, I mean, I got a roommate,” Garduño says.

Abiding by COVID-19 safety guidelines made it difficult for students to participate in socially distant activities outside of their dorm rooms. Kent State offered many activities and workshops virtually through Zoom or other online mediums, but many freshmen struggled to even leave their rooms. Ohio weather also determined when students could leave, as sunshine turned to snow in a matter of weeks.

Students kept their spirits up by doing a few small things per day to get them outside.

“I made it a goal to walk at least a mile a day, and that definitely has been helping me get out of the house. During the fall semester, I didn’t have any in-person classes. I didn’t really have as many opportunities to leave,” Garduño says.

“But I did work at Chipotle last semester. I did walk to work, so I did get that mile in. But I mean, other than that, I would go to the DI Hub just because it was right next to my dorm.”

For many freshmen that lived on campus, weekly COVID-19 testing was required. Students that planned on returning

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to campus were also tested before they were cleared to come back to Kent State.

“I actually did sit right where I am now [Garduño’s living room] and take my at-home test before I went back to campus, like the spit-in-a-cup thing over a Zoom call,” Garduño says. “It was very awkward. But then, I mean, I’ve been getting tested once a week, and I’ve tested negative every single time.”

Even though the testing process varied in the beginning of the semester, many students agree that frequent testing was the way to keep everyone as safe as possible.

“So in the beginning, it was flipping, like where you would just do it every so often. Now since I’ve come back after winter break, you have to get tested once a week to stay in the dorm, so I think that’s a pretty smart move,” Donovan says.

Students that decided to enroll in colleges and online learning needed to adapt and overcome this new method of learning. Many freshmen took to social media to air their grievances about attending college remotely.

User @shitsalagiggles on TikTok posted a viral video that simply reads, “College is now literally just watching a 2-hour long lecture video, to take notes, to participate in a discussion board, to turn in homework, to do well on a test, to pass a class, to get credit, to earn a degree, to have a SMALL CHANCE of getting a solid career.” @v.annilla agreed and commented, “Like I’m a freshman this year and I’ve wanted to drop out at least 30x this WEEK. What’s the point of all this busywork?? I’m not learning anything.”

Online classes not only created a learning barrier between professors and students but a communication barrier amongst peers. Freshmen students that were used to seeing classmates for a concentrated majority of the week now rely on social media and apps such as GroupMe to get to know and get in touch with their fellow classmates.

“Originally, my Honors Colloquium English class was completely asynchronous. And that definitely put a lot of pressure on not just me, but like all of my classmates, because we didn’t really have a way to talk to each other or ease off of each other, and for an English class, especially colloquium, like, that’s so important,” Garduño says. “I don’t exactly know what I’m missing out on, because I’m only a first-year student.”

The absence of face-to-face interaction has caused many college students’ mental health to plummet and has brought them to on-campus counseling services. According to Fordham University professor Lindsey Till Hoyt, one-third of college students reported emotional distress brought on by the coronavirus pandemic.

“That first semester I came in, I was doing really good, working out all the time, and toward the last two months, it’s just kinda started going downhill, because you’re coming out of high school, and you talk to 40 plus people a day, and then you’re just stuck in a dorm room, no in-person classes, no way to get out and meet people,” says Donovan. “And I did get really depressed in those last two months.”

“I’ve always gone to a counselor. I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety already. I’m just naturally an extrovert and not being able to have that access to people and to being social, I think definitely did a number on my mental health,” Garduño says.

As vaccinations begin to be rolled out and COVID-19 cases start to decline, many freshmen students are planning for events that they missed in the past year and hope to reunite with friends and family as safely as possible. According to CollegeData.com, in life after COVID-19, 25% of freshmen students are most looking forward to socializing in person and real human connections, while 19% are looking forward to returning to the traditional college experience.

“I’m hoping that over spring break, I can go visit my uncle in New York City, because ... I’ve only been once but it was my absolute favorite place on Earth. I’ve just been wanting to find an excuse to go back,” Garduño says.

College students may be some of the last groups to receive the vaccination for COVID-19, however, the hope that some of their college careers may be salvaged acts as a hope to many that the pandemic may soon be over.

“I’m ready to give it another shot,” Donovan says. “This has been a growth period for me and for many people.”

ANNIE ZWISLER | azwisle1@kent.edu

For students who are extroverted and enjoy being around people, the lockdowns and social distancing affected many aspects of their day-to-day wellbeing.

“This photo I took on my way home for the weekend during golden hour. It shows how empty the campus is during the times of COVID-19.”

-Emma Fisher, Freshman

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M E N TA L AMERICANA How another epidemic infected America WORDS BY Sarah McGinnis ILLUSTRATIONS BY Emily Aslanis TW: this article discusses mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, substance abuse, and racial trauma.

T

HE LAST YEAR OF ILLNESS, INJUSTICE AND POLITICS has ushered in a dramatic change in mental health.

These influential events resulted in a stressful environment that breeds psychological health issues. A 2020 report by the American Psychological Association found that nearly one in five adults — 19% of the population — say their mental health was worse than it was at the same time in the year prior. The stress the United States has faced over this transformational era has caused lasting damage to the nation’s mental health, leaving some more vulnerable than others. Hardships like financial instability, lack of health care and trauma from social and political movements left the country exposed to a variety of mental health issues.

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trapped with abusive partners, parents and caretakers. In April 2020, the New York Times reported an increase in calls to domestic violence hotlines and abuse-related police reports.

The effects of the pandemic will likely linger after it is over.

According to the CDC, 26.3% of adults reported symptoms of a trauma and stressor related disorder (TSRD) related to the pandemic.

POLITICAL LANDSCAPE

COVID-19 PANDEMIC

The most glaring change in American life since 2020 is the COVID-19 pandemic. Overnight, lockdown orders forced Americans to tailor their lives to fit in the confines of our homes. In-person classes and nine to five office jobs were squeezed into Zoom meetings; shopping malls and bars closed their doors indefinitely. When the most unexpected but massive shift occurred, billions of people felt helpless and afraid. According to a survey conducted last June by the Center for Disease Control, 40.9% of respondents reported at least one adverse mental or behavioral health condition, including symptoms of anxiety or depression.

Quarantine has bred mental health issues that left lasting effects on Americans. In addition to symptoms of anxiety and depression, those affected experienced suicidal ideation and actions. The CDC reported that in June, approximately twice as many respondents reported serious consideration of suicide than adults had in the U.S. in 2018.

Stay-at-home orders led to a loneliness that was as desolate as it was necessary. Feeling lonely was unavoidable as the country tried to fight rising case numbers. Depression coupled with isolation has led to the use of unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as binge-eating and substance abuse.

Elections are always stressful, but for many, the 2020 presidential election was terrifying. The stress did not end with the election, from the weeks of mail-in ballot counting to the politically-motivated Capitol attack on January 6. An APA study found that nearly two in three adults (65%) felt that the amount of uncertainty in the nation last year caused them stress.

The instability many citizens feel due to the political climate has created anxiety and fear in most people. Jason Miller, director of the Counseling Center, explains that the volatility and uncertainty of the world instilled anxiety in Americans.

“This up and down turmoil was unsettling by definition,” Miller says. “But it was also unsettling, because you never knew what was going to happen until you woke up in the morning and saw the news.”

The polarizing nature of politics makes it more difficult to connect with others. Over half of Americans stated that discussing politics with those they disagree with was “stressful and frustrating,” according to a 2018 report from the Pew Research Center. The lack of common ground between political ideologies further deepens the gap between citizens. In a country that is both isolated by a pandemic and divided by social and political issues, loneliness and anxiety are now commonplace.

Some were also put in dangerous situations by being

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VULNERABILITY OF GEN Z Though everyone has been affected by last year’s events, the younger generations were hit the hardest. According to the APA’s 2020 study, Generation Z adults reported the highest stress level on average, at 6.1 out of 10. This is significantly higher than the stress reported by any other generation. Miller believes this is due to the transitional nature of adolescence.

The vulnerability of college-age adults has made it difficult for many students to balance academics with mental health. This is made more strenuous as on-campus housing maintained a low resident capacity; many students have been forced to navigate remote learning and living back home. Instead of spending these college years developing emotionally and intellectually, many college students are in their childhood bedrooms, staring at Zoom calls.

Those who are able to live on campus need to abide by strict rules, leading to a disconnect between the traditional college experience and the one they are receiving.

“It’s a formative part of their life, and there’s a lot changing in those five to 10 years,” Miller says. “That’s just slowed to a halt, and you’re living at your parents’ house, taking online classes.”

BLM MOVEMENT

“Find out what makes you, you,” Miller says. “What relaxes you, grounds you and makes sense of your world.”

– JASON MILLER

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In June, the fight against racial injustice in the U.S. came to a head. The murders of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery and countless others triggered a worldwide movement to end racially-motivated police brutality.

Witnessing these deaths and protests has triggered memories of trauma that the Black community has faced. A journal article by racial healing trainor Kenneth T. Ponds states that trauma from racial discrimination produces feelings of fear, anxiety, depression, helplessness and post-traumatic stress disorder.

Racial trauma is a type of traumatic stress that occurs from experiencing racial discrimination and dangerous situations that stem from prejudice. The overwhelming number of news and social media stories on police brutality, racial bias and other distressing events are vicarious traumatic stressors for Black people. Hearing about other Black people’s racial trauma becomes a trigger in itself, because it forces many to relive similar past experiences over again.

BARRIERS FOR LOW-INCOME AMERICANS Low-income Americans were especially susceptible to the lows of 2020. In 2016, the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) stated in a federal report that nearly a quarter of Americans suffering with mental illness were living below the poverty line. This is exacerbated by the stress that financial instability causes.

Even with these factors aside, low-income individuals are still experiencing mental distress at a higher level than others because of financial barriers. The psychological pain low-income Americans face due to instability of housing, employment and healthcare has only worsened in the past year. In spite of the CDC’s eviction moratorium, those who could not afford to pay their rent were evicted since the start of the pandemic. The National Low Income Housing Coalition estimates that as of February 2021, over 158 people across Ohio are evicted every day. Due to unemployment as a result of the pandemic, low-income individuals and families are now facing homelessness.

One of the most detrimental financial disadvantages is a

lack of insurance or disposable income to pay for therapy and medication — an expense so steep that it puts many Americans into debt. This factor is the fundamental difference that makes psychological healthcare so difficult for many Americans to reach.

RESOURCES AND HEALING While it has been a traumatizing year, it is possible to move forward and mend some of the damage. Kent State’s Counseling and Psychological Services offers one-on-one therapy, support groups and psychological testing to in-state students and accepts insurance. The Counseling Center provides individual and group counseling that is completely free to Kent State students. All of the university psychological services are offered remotely to promote social distancing.

Aside from professional help, it is also important to focus on self-care and mindfulness during these extreme circumstances. Miller suggests limiting time spent consuming news and upsetting media, as well as taking up a hobby to stay busy and relaxed. He also recommends taking a “self-inventory” and staying aware of your mental state, leaving yourself the time to practice self-care.

“Find out what makes you, you,” Miller says. “What relaxes you, grounds you and makes sense of your world.”

SARAH MCGINNIS | smcginn4@kent.edu

“It’s a formative part of their life, and there’s a lot changing in those five to 10 years,” Miller says. “That’s just slowed to a halt, and you’re living at your parents’ house, taking online classes.”

– JASON MILLER

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TREE CITY & TIKTOK the perfect blend Mom-and-pop coffee shop goes digital to save business

WORDS BY Sara Crawford PHOTOS BY Anna Lawrence The smell of freshly ground coffee beans wafts around the room as you lean back in your chair, put your feet up on a stool at the fireplace and open up your laptop to do the work you promised yourself you would do. There is something irreplaceable about walking around a crowded coffee shop and finding the perfect spot to hunker down, work and drink fresh coffee. Something that, with the current pandemic, is unachievable with different guidelines in place.

At the beginning of the pandemic, Kent’s Tree City Coffee & Pastry was strictly take-out, with shorter hours and only a couple of employees working at a time. Eventually, the shop opened for seating, but the crowded coffee shop that we once knew is no longer, as spots are spaced out for accurate social distancing.

“When COVID hit, we weren’t even sure that we would stay open,” Christian Edmisten, a shift leader at Tree City, says.

In addition to the struggle of being in the middle of a pandemic, ownership switched to Rebekah Gillespie and her husband in May 2020, creating a new set of difficulties.

“It’s been challenging, kind of like a roller coaster, I would say,” Gillespie says. “I definitely would not recommend opening up your own business [during a pandemic].”

Gillespie is a veteran and was a critical care and emergency room nurse for almost 20 years. In December 2019, she decided with her husband, Brian, that it was time for a career change.

One of Gillespie’s biggest dreams was to own a place that would not only sell coffee but wine, cocktails and desserts — a place that would create a space for people to gather and enjoy the

company of each other. Tree City became the perfect place for her to make her dream a reality.

“When we found Tree City, it just fit everything that I foresaw Tree City becoming and what I have my dream set as, so that’s why we went ahead and pursued it,” Gillespie says.

While Tree City has been an established business since 2011, when the Gillespies took over, it started over as a brand new business.

“We’re a mom-and-pop place starting from the bottom up,” Gillespie says. “It’s been a challenge having people understand that as well, because they think Tree City is just the Tree City that they’ve known for the last 11 years, and it’s really not.”

In addition to a change in ownership in May, due to the pandemic, business has been down, and it has been increasingly hard for Tree City to stay afloat. The Paycheck Protection Program from the U.S. Small Business Administration offers loans to help keep the small business’s

“The pandemic is hindering the dreams, and it’s been more of a matter of survival at this point.

So, I’ve put the dreams on hold and concentrated on surviving.”

REBEKAH GILLESPIE

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let me try it,” and started filming.

In the first TikTok she posted, Maag explains the struggles her mom and the business are going through, saying, “Through the pandemic, we may not make it through the winter. Our sales are just barely covering bills, and they seem to decline every day.”

“I wanted to show the whole place,” Maag says. “Outside, inside, and because it was decorated for Christmas, it looked really pretty.”

Entrance to Tree City Coffee & Pastry in Kent, OH.

workforce employed throughout the pandemic. Due to the time period when they became owners, the Gillespies were unable to be a part of the first loans, and they did not qualify for the second loans.

Maag then takes the audience into the decorated coffee shop, showing the pastries inside the cases and filming her mom while saying, “Isn’t she cute!” Finally, Maag pulls out a cup and starts making the first of many “TikTok” drinks.

Due to the lack of support, Tree City is currently funded by the owners and customers and them alone.

“The first drink I made was just something I made up,” Maag says. “It’s a caramel macchiato, but I made it pink, and I put whipped cream on top and sprinkles. I just wanted to make it pretty.”

“The pandemic is hindering the dreams, and it’s been more of a matter of survival at this point,” Gillespie says. “So, I’ve put the dreams on hold and concentrated on surviving.”

When the viral video was posted on Dec. 1, 2020, it received more than 253,000 views, 69,000 likes and over 2,000 comments, and Tree City quickly began getting recognition.

Tree City, like many other small businesses, has continued to struggle throughout the pandemic and they fear what might happen if business slows down more than what it has already.

With her TikTok notifications turned off, Maag had no idea that the video was blowing up until she opened the app the next morning.

At the same time, something unique has come out of the COVID-19 pandemic, as people, stuck at home, resorted to being on their phones a lot more than in the past. For many, they turned to download TikTok, a social media app where users can post a range of videos less than a minute long from dances to comedy sketches and more.

“The first day, nothing and then the second day, I woke up, and it had like 100,000 views,” Maag says.

According to Sensor Tower, in December 2020, TikTok was downloaded over 2.6 billion times worldwide. The platform itself grew in the beginning months of COVID-19, with 115 million downloads in March, 107 million in April and 112 million in May. Shelby Maag is a shift leader at Tree City and the daughter of Gillespie. While watching TikTok, Maag would see kids of small business owners posting videos encouraging people to come in and support them and got inspired. Maag figured, “Why not

After opening the app, Maag ran downstairs, showing her mom the countless notifications.

“I was in shock, I was like, ‘No way! Are you serious?’” Gillespie says. “It was a very surreal moment.”

Comments like, “This is the best coffee place in Kent,” “Tree City was a staple in my college education” and “I wish I was closer!” flooded each video posted. Many of those who are not from the Kent area decided to “make the trip” and drive down to try the different drinks, whether the trip is half an hour or over two hours.

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“You just didn’t expect that to happen, and I mean I am thankful that it did and thankful for all the support that everyone did show us at that time and the encouraging words and everything had meant a lot.”

REBEKAH GILLESPIE

Shelby Maag working at her mother’s business, Tree City in downtown Kent.

O

N THE FIRST DAY AFTER THE VIDEO BLEW UP, everyone at Tree City knew it was going to be a crazy day. “That Saturday was insane, but it was a good insane!” Gillespie says.

Edmisten was supposed to work later in the day, but due to the rush, he came in earlier. “I came into just a swarm of people,” he says. “It felt like a dream at first.”

“We did our best day ever,” Maag says. “Ever.”

When Maag originally showed her mom the idea of posting the TikTok, Gillespie figured it would be a good small boost to get a few more customers in. Little did she know that it would bring in a packed weekend. “You just didn’t expect that to happen, and I mean I am thankful that it did and thankful for all the support that everyone did show us at that time and the encouraging words and everything had meant a lot,” Gillespie says.

That weekend, Tree City was the busiest it’s ever been under the Gillespies. Due to social distancing, customers stood six-feet apart, and the line spilled outside. Inside, there was a system set up, where customers would go up and order, wait in a separate place for their drink and then leave a certain way to prevent a traffic jam.

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Not only was the line for walking into the shop busy, but the line for the drive-thru went all the way down the oneway street, pouring out onto Water Street.

“I did have to come in and work, because it was so busy, and no one else wanted to work, because they were so busy. So my mom was like, ‘Go in, it’s your fault,’” Maag says. “But it’s a good thing.”

After the first day of success, Maag continued to make videos throughout the week, all with different special drinks, first starting with ones she invented and then making ones unique to their own menu.

“I made another drink; it was a peppermint frappe, but it was layered with red and white like a candy cane, and a couple of people wanted that,” Maag says. “And then I had to make it because no one else could figure out how to make it.”

Some of the customers would come in to try the drinks she made specifically in the videos. “We had a lot of people coming in like, ‘I want the TikTok drink!’” Edmisten says.

As the fame from TikTok slowed down, so did the business that was originally flowing through the doors. While at first,

people came from all over, now it has become more of the regulars that came to Tree City before the video went viral.

“I have people comment on the TikTok saying, ‘Well, you guys always look busy,’” Maag says. “It always looks busy in here, because people just sit in here.”

After the first weekend, there was a slow decline in the number of people coming in. As the holidays came, business returned to what it was before the TikTok went viral. Both January and February were rougher months for Tree City, similar to what November was like before she made the viral video in the first week of December.

For Maag, she was able to give the recognition and receive some of the support she sought when posting on TikTok. “I just wanted more people to come in, and I really want my mom to succeed, because this is her dream. She finally got to do that,” Maag says. “She was a single parent until she met my stepdad. She’s always taking care of me, [I wanted to] give back to her.”

businesses and bring them attention, it can also be a negative place. This is why Maag took a break from TikTok for a month before fully returning to the app at the end of February.

“She knows that business has been down,” Gillespie says.

“That’s why she is trying to start back up again.”

Now, Maag is back making drinks that will be on their specialty menu in the upcoming months. Whether that be a Lucky Charms Frappe, a Thin Mint Latte or even one of their drinks spiked for a late afternoon treat.

Each of these specialty drinks is a collaborative effort, with all of the baristas creating their own delicious concoctions.

“It makes them feel like they’re a part of the business which is exactly what I want, because it’s not corporate; this is a mom-and-pop place,” Gillespie says.

SARA CRAWFORD |scrawf23@kent.edu

Not only has Gillespie seen the groups of people come in to try these unique drinks, but many see her and mention how she is “Shelby’s mom.”

With Maag’s intentions behind these videos is to help her mom, Gillespie remains speechless: “As a mom, you’re just kind of blown away that she can be so selfless and do something so kind.”

While social media can be a positive place to share small

Shelby Maag, the owner’s daughter, makes a caramel macchiato that was popularized

by TikTok.

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Black Lives Matter Moving Forward 44 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

Black Kent students share reaction to social... movements that shaped summer of 2020

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LACK SQUARES, RAISED FISTS AND ACAB TWITTER MEMES.

The Black Lives Matter movement has always been more than that.

Though the Black Lives Matter protests that spread across the nation during the summer of 2020 have long since been removed from headlines, front pages and newscasts, the fight for justice and an end to police brutality continues.

Movement leaders hold conversations discussing safety in Black communities, calls to action and demands for legislative change.

“I would just describe [Black Lives Matter] as a huge movement that has a lot of moving parts,” senior journalism major Alex Gray says. “It’s not just signing petitions, it’s not just going out and protesting. It’s also, like, checking your family, checking your closest friends. It’s making sure that people feel safe around you and around the people that you’re around.”

The summer of 2020 highlighted a lot of non-Black allies showing support for the Black Lives Matter movement, including protests held on Kent State’s campuses, and it is important that the community stays united to enact real change.

“Everything about it is just uplifting in my personal view, and people that [were] involved in it ... were so passionate, because our lives are really being taken from us just, like, casually,” sophomore DMP major CeeJay Scott says. “When it comes to a group of people such as us Black people, we don’t really see justice, we really don’t see fairness, so I just hope

overall the country just does better, and people actually start learning and waking up about these situations.”

There is still a long way to go for equality, and the first step is educating people about the meaning behind and goals of the movement, junior VCD major Mariah Johnson says.

“I just want it to get better, even if it’s just a little bit. I just want to keep having stepping stones to see things get better.

People actually trying to be a part of it and see what’s actually going on because so many people just try to pretend like nothing’s happening. And there’s a lot happening. Even if it doesn’t affect them as a person or it doesn’t affect their life at all I feel they should still try to understand it.

As someone who’s mixed it’s been kind of rough on my end just because some people treat me like, ‘Oh, you’re too, white to be black and too black to be white.’”

Black students and Black people should not have to live in fear. The Black experience during the 2020 protests and afterward is a lot more than a trendy hashtag.

The movement is about protecting Black lives, and that needs to continue to be amplified.

“I hope that at some point, I don’t have to say that my life matters,” Gray says. “I would like it to be a known fact, and it’s not right now.”

WORDS BY ZARIA JOHNSON PHOTOS BY ANNA LAWRENCE

IN COLLABORATION WITH UHURU

GP, DIGITAL SCIENCE MAJOR, SENIOR I think is important, but it depends on who is doing it. So what I mean by that is when we have Black Lives Matter protests that are tearing down our cities and burning down stuff and rioting and tearing down our own communities.

That's not what the Black Lives Matter movement is and what it should represent. But, when we have peaceful protests and we say, hey, police. Can you please denounce police brutality? That is what the Black Lives Matter movement should be and what it should stand for.

In the future, I hope that Black people as a race have a total turnaround and total complete change. To me, the Black Lives Matter movement is deeper against police brutality, to me, the Black Lives Matter movement is empowering each other. So, support Black business, protect Black women, don’t dog each other. It’s something that we have to focus on really really hard and with this generation. It’s on us to teach the next generation, how to love yourself.

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ALEX GRAY, JOURNALISM MAJOR, SENIOR My hope is that people who are guilty pay for what they’re guilty for. My hope is that we stop trying to politicize something that should just be a human rights issue. It doesn’t have to be this political or this jarring for people.

I would describe it as a long haul. The Black Lives Matter movement did not start last year in the slightest after the murder of George Floyd. It really ramped up over the summer, and I think it helped that it was over the summer, because people were out of school. COVID was happening, so everyone was home already antsy, so there were a lot of people that were already pissed off. And then this happened. It kind of just put everything into gear and people started organizing, but it really is just a movement full of different people, different colors, different backgrounds.

MARIAH JOHNSON, VCD, JUNIOR I would say it’s a movement for Black people trying to get their voices heard. Because a lot of the time, our voices aren’t heard, so it’s just a lot of people coming together, and they want to make a difference.

I’m hoping that people become more educated, and they learn about it more and people don’t just say like, ‘Oh, I’m part of Black Lives Matter, because everyone else is.’ I’m hoping people actually are educated in it, and it opens people’s eyes to see what it’s really about and what needs to happen, because I feel like a lot of people just try to brush it off or pretend nothing’s happening, and things are happening, and that needs to be different.

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CEEJAY SCOTT, DIGITAL MEDIA PRODUCTIONS, SOPHOMORE Everything about it is just uplifting in my personal view and people that was involved in it and they were so passionate because our lives are really being taken from us just like casually.

When Kent State did it, I saw a lot of Caucasian students and Indian students like marching for like for Black people as well, and trying to make their voices heard, even though they don’t experience the same thing we experienced, they still want to stand with us.

I feel like government officials should start making changes to like whether the police enforce their laws, the way they go about situations like this, and comparing it to how when people were raiding the Capitol versus how they treated Black Lives Matter protesters. It was a major difference because they gave the capital situation like mall cops when Black Lives Matter was happening the incident came up with SWAT gassing people, teargassing little kids and just overall major changes. Just a different outlook on everything.

SCAN QR CODE FOR MORE INFORMATION

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a prison of THOUGHTS The reality of Pure O OCD WORDS BY Jess Goodwin ILLUSTRATION BY Preston Randall

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SNOWMAN-SHAPED NOTEPAD. sits on my desk with the words “call psych” on it. Under the letters is the number for Kent State Counseling and Psychological Services.

That note to myself was one of the very few points of reality that I came to during my most recent episode.

I have experienced episodes like this my entire life. They come in all shapes and forms and have been named different things throughout the years. The doctors thought they were just panic attacks or states of depression. It wasn’t until college that I finally found the vocabulary to explain what was going on in my brain during these episodes, and when I did finally express it, the doctors and I finally hit the nail on the head. I have obsessive-compulsive disorder.

My diagnosis was a shock to many of the people in my life. My mom’s first reaction was, “but your room was always such a mess.” I even coined the nickname “Messy Jessie” as a kid. Many might think that OCD is all about cleaning and organizing, but it has many layers.

The International OCD Foundation defines the disorder as “a mental health disorder that affects people of all ages and walks of life and occurs when a person gets caught in a cycle of obsessions and compulsions.

Obsessions are unwanted, intrusive

50 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

thoughts, images or urges that trigger intensely distressing feelings. Compulsions are behaviors an individual engages in to attempt to get rid of the obsessions and/ or decrease his or her distress.” Most people’s ideation about OCD revolves around cleaning frantically or washing hands until

lived in the same small town in southeastern Ohio her entire life. Mental health and wellness were not things that were brought up much in her early life. She faced most difficulties with positive sayings and prayer. She is a walking “live, laugh, love” sign. She would use common phrases like,

they are raw. Although that is a type of OCD, it is not the only one. I have a subsection of OCD called Pure O.

“God gives his biggest battles to his strongest warriors,” “We are stronger because of what happened” or “Just think positive, and everything will work out.” She has come a long way on this journey. She was learning about all this at the same time I was.

VeryWell Mind defines Pure O as “a form of OCD marked by intrusive, unwanted and uncontrollable thoughts (or obsessions).

While someone experiencing Pure O may not engage in obvious behaviors related to their intrusive thoughts, such as counting, arranging or hand-washing, the disorder is instead accompanied by hidden mental rituals.”

If you have never experienced it, it is difficult to understand. When I first tried to explain it to my mom, she was horrified. “I didn’t know what to think. I mean I had thought that I have thought things that are kind of weird, but I guess not. I wanted so bad to understand,” my mom says. “I felt helpless. At first, it was like I failed as a mother, that it was something I did wrong, but that’s because I didn’t understand back then.”

My mom, Paula, tries her best. She was born in 1962 and did not have my brother or me until she was in her thirties. She has

I was 14 when I started having panic attacks. I received a traumatic brain injury from cheerleading that left me bed-ridden for over a week. With this head injury, I was able to speak about my feelings more openly. My mental state was being checked on for the first time in my life. I started describing symptoms like heavy breathing, heart palpitations and shakes. I remember only being able to describe the feeling as being scared. I was just scared for no reason.

It was the night before my first day of freshman year. Driving home from school supply shopping with my mom, I was panicking that we waited until the last minute to go shopping, and I would not be able to find the things I needed. Every year my school supplies must be perfect. The binders must match the notebooks, and the notebooks

must match the folders, and I need the right kind of pens or else my notes will not turn out right. I would sit in the school supplies aisles and just stare at the options. I needed to pick the stuff that felt right. If it did not feel right, it would not work. I would not work. On the car ride home, one of my best friends called me. She was scared too. As she was talking, I took my mom’s hand as tears streamed down my face. I tried not to show my tears in my voice. The rest of the night is mostly a blur. I put together my bookbag and tried on numerous outfits. As the clock ticked on, the dread got worse. My mom found me sitting in my closet shaking and crying. She tried her best to soothe me, but neither her nor I knew what I needed. I spent hours that night like that. My brother, who was a senior at the time, tried to reassure me, but none of it mattered. The racing thoughts and “what-ifs” would not stop. My mom and I sat in my closet until 4 a.m. It was that night that my mom said she finally realized that something was wrong.

At the time of my OCD diagnosis, I was 19.

Before that, I was already diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and major depressive disorder at the age of 15. I had done my rounds with doctors and counselors as well as medications, and I thought I was on the straight and narrow. However, college really made me face my problems.

College was a culture shock as it is for many incoming freshmen. I never lived this far from my family. I never shared a room with

anyone. I can still remember the feeling of my stomach dropping as I watched my family and my roommate’s family drive away from Clark Hall. I was excited for the freedom college provides and this new adventure, but there was this familiar dread that lingered in the back of my mind.

To try and control this dread, I put myself on a schedule. This schedule was detailed from when I went to the bathroom all the way down to which bathroom on campus, which stall I used and which sink I washed my hands in. This was not written down or anything. It was all up in my head.

The pasta bar in The Market on the second floor of the Student Center was where I ate on Mondays and Wednesdays for lunch after class. I would wait in line with my headphones while listening to a podcast, usually “RuPaul: What’s the Tee w/ Michelle Visage.”

The line was always long as the pasta bar was the best food option on campus at the time. When it was my turn to order, I recited the same thing I always did, “Can I get onions, peppers and cavatappi please?”

Everything was going as per usual. I scooted down the line as my pasta was cooked in front of me. When I got to the end, I was holding an empty tumbler cup that I drank from that morning. This was a new addition to my normal routine. As I was handed my pasta, I dropped the tumbler. This was a disruption to my schedule. I quickly picked it up and went to find a seat in the dining area.

My heart was beating fast, my hands were

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sweaty and I was not even hungry anymore. I was so angry with myself. “This is why we do not mess with the schedule,” my brain said. “Why are you so stupid?” The entire rest of the day was ruined. I was exhausted and finished my day off poorly and just went to bed. I never took that tumbler to class again.

I have always been self-aware of my issues, so I did research on what I was feeling. That is when I finally found the vocabulary to explain. I was experiencing intrusive thoughts. These thoughts are what is not understood. They are a hidden prison that people with OCD are trapped by. The nonprofit organization Made of Millions explains the variety of intrusive thoughts stating, “They can center around religious beliefs, sexuality, relationships, bodily functions, violence, physical health and many other themes. Most intrusive thoughts are disturbing and distressing, but some can be so strange and bizarre that they border on humorous.”

On most days, I can shake off these thoughts, but on others, they are like knives being thrown at me from all directions. It could be a completely normal day, and everything is going like clockwork — then a thought pops up. It marinates. It festers. Then suddenly I am surrounded, encircled by shadow figures all screaming the same thing at me.

“You are nothing, you deserved what happened to you.”

“Bang your head against the wall then you won’t need to do anything. A concussion will give you a week off of responsibility.”

“Your mom did not pick up your call? She is dead. You were not there for her.”

Dealing with these thoughts is complicated. I am still trying to figure it out myself. Sometimes a mental compulsion will take them away. For example, I will repeat phrases in my head. A common one is a snippet of the Mac Miller song “O.K.” At the end of the song, he sings in a high voice, “it’ll be OK,” and that exact clip plays over and over in my head.

There are many different subtypes of OCD. Mine just happens to be called Pure O and plagues mostly just my thoughts. The important thing is to ask for help.

So, I did.

The thoughts were getting too loud recently.

Jess Goodwin | jgoodw18@kent.edu

52 | THE BURR MAGAZINE

LEVEL UP Childhood video games diversify students’ empty schedules WORDS BY Holly Liptak ILLUSTRATION BY Abbey Pickens

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EGINNING HER GAMING JOURNEY IN A FAMILY OF. video game console collectors, Kennedy — or “K” as she goes by on social media to protect her identity — learned the wonders of the digital world at a young age. From “Super Mario” to “Sunset Riders,” she has always loved jumping between the magic of new worlds. Now a law student, TikTok creator and self-described “cozy gamer,” Kennedy has reverted back to her gaming habits after a long hiatus attributed to high school and college complications.

Since its start a year ago, the pandemic has left students like Kennedy grasping for normality. It seems many have turned to hobbies from earlier in their lives: old music, classic TV shows and namely, low-stakes video games were rediscovered as coping mechanisms for the stress of the pandemic.

Karin Coifman, associate professor of psychological services at Kent State, explains that because there is an unprecedented stressor in everyone’s lives right now, there are many coping methods presenting themselves -- some healthy, some unhealthy. Coifman says nostalgia has proved to be a healthy

game where users become a part of a local community after inheriting their grandfather’s farm — has made a permanent place in her heart. The routines, the characters’ stories and the upbeat soundtrack are what draw Kennedy in; she loves to immerse herself in the “Stardew” world.

After finding a small community of female gamers with her Instagram account @cozy.games, Kennedy began to feel that there was a place for her and her interests. She started posting photos of her cozy setup on Instagram, which gained popularity. She then took to TikTok, where she was met with an even bigger community of people with the same interests.

“It’s affirming, and it’s validating as a human to just have somebody else say, ‘Hey, me too.’ That just really makes you feel a sense of belonging and makes you feel like you’re valid in having those interests,” she says. “That’s important in any community with any interests, but it’s really, really hard to do in these times. It’s really hard to find community in anything. Gaming is a really nice interest to have right now, and it’s a good community to join because it’s virtual.”

indulgence while stuck at home.

“There’s such a sense of uncertainty and an inability to predict what’s going to happen next or how things are going to go or when things are going to get better or if they’re going to get worse again, that we then are drawn to things that feel predictable, safe, reliable and often, these are things that make us feel good,” she says. “And frankly, there’s nothing wrong with it. In times like this, I think the more we can make ourselves feel safe and good, in healthy ways, the better it is for us.”

Low-stakes, relaxing games are Kennedy’s forte, and since she began studying law, she has used them as an effective distraction tactic from stress and work. “Stardew Valley” — a

Once COVID-19 hit last March, Kennedy learned to cope with stress on a larger scale. She was able to identify gaming as a healthy coping mechanism earlier in life, so she was more prepared than most when the pandemic began.

“When COVID happened, I think a lot of people were like, ‘What do I do to cope? Do I bake? What’s gonna make me not feel awful?’ But I was kind of like ‘Oh, I already know: that’s gaming. So I’m just gonna keep doing that,’” she says.

Kennedy, along with over 31 million other Americans, became the proud owner of “Animal Crossing: New Horizons” in 2020.

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The game, which is only available on the Nintendo Switch, sold 11.77 million copies just 12 days after its release, according to Ars Technica. To put that in perspective: “Animal Crossing: Wild World,” a 2005 game for the Nintendo DS, has sold 11.75 million copies over its entire lifetime.

Emily Adkins, a junior at the University of Mount Union, began playing “Animal Crossing: New Horizons” at the start of the pandemic and recalls it filling spaces in her life where classes and work once were. Since schools and public places reopened in the meantime, she regained a day-to-day schedule and the game faded into the background of her life.

The release of the game on March 20, 2020, almost perfectly coincided with the declaration of COVID-19 as a national “What I found is that [video games] add structure, especially emergency in the United States on March 13, 2020. Beginning when there is nothing else going on in my life,” she says. “After the week of March 19, states began to instill lockdown orders, classes got dumped for the year, when I couldn’t go back to all differing slightly, but all recommending that citizens work, it felt like it was my job to go on to ‘Animal Crossing.’ greatly limit trips outside their homes. Students moving back There was a very clear itinerary I could follow. It gave me some in with their parents and limiting outside contact most likely structure in my day.” led to the tremendous spike in a comfort game like “Animal Crossing: New Horizons.”

The game has several tasks like picking fruit, buying furniture and speaking with villagers that allow players to feel as though

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“Frankly, there’s nothing wrong with it. In times like this, I think the more we can make ourselves feel safe and good, in healthy ways, the better it is for us.”

– KARIN COIFMAN they also can serve as a sense of consistency in a time of uncertainty. Many students moved back into their parents’ homes due to the pandemic flipping their college experience on its head. Classes are a hodgepodge of WiFi cutouts, sharing pets on screen, younger siblings interrupting and early morning classes in bed. Some students are almost forced back into their younger habits being home, but humans thrive on routine, and predictability is how some learned to cope.

“Kids who are home with their parents and they have to go to school online, half their world is upside down. Your entire world, your entire experience of college, I think is completely 180 degrees from where it should be. You’re away from home, but you’re not really away; you’re kind of transitioned. You’re supposed to be at college, but you’re not really at college,” Coifman says. “It makes sense that you might be drawn back to moments where you felt safe and things were good and predictable, which would presumably be high school or middle school.”

Alyssa Coyle, a Kent State freshman photography major, says her and her friend reverted back to a game they used to play together in high school: “Minecraft.” A game where players must survive by their own creativity, “Minecraft” can be played on “Creative, Survival, Adventure or Hardcore mode,” with the former lacking enemies. Coyle typically plays on Creative mode to focus on autonomy rather than overcoming challenges and defeating enemies.

they accomplished things without ever putting down their Nintendo Switch. While players can invite friends to their island, it is mainly intended for players to design their own island and carry out adventures with the help of non-playable characters. Another likely reason the game grew during social distancing: friends are included.

In the “Minecraft” world, everything, including the landscape, animals, clouds and characters, is made of cubes. The distinct design has hardly evolved as the company has released more games, yet its sales topped 200 million with 126 million people playing the game monthly, according to The Verge.

“Minecraft” also saw a 25% increase in new players and a 40% increase in group sessions in 2020.

“I do feel like ‘Animal Crossing’ is more intended to be solitary, “I can be creative in it, and it’s a way for me to get out creative because it comes with those little anthropomorphic buddies energy without doing [schoolwork],” Coyle says. “I’m a for you to be friends with. It comes with friends, you don’t photography major, so I have to do photography projects all need to invite people. You don’t need to talk to anybody,” the time. This is something creative I can do where I don’t Adkins says. “I’m just gonna go talk to some cat until he gives have to be told what to do.” me a t-shirt, and then I will take that t-shirt and treasure it for the rest of my life.”

Since its release in 2011, “Minecraft” has been known for its soft, twinkling piano music that for many players amplifies Video games not only serve as an effective distraction tactic, the immersion. Coyle says she listens to the music while she

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“After classes got dumped for the year, when I couldn’t go back to work, it felt like it was my job to go on to “Animal Crossing.”

– EMILY ADKINS

studies sometimes; Kennedy does the same with music from “Stardew Valley.”

Typically upbeat and optimistic, video game soundtracks can help listeners navigate everyday tasks and give them the same sense of accomplishment as they get when defeating a final boss. Adkins says video game soundtracks help her focus on homework, because there are no lyrics, and it allows her to devote all her attention to her work.

Video game music is composed to be background music to keep players focused working efficiently. According to Head Stuff, playing video game music while working can trigger imaginative thinking for those in creative fields. For mundane tasks like data entry, upbeat tunes like that of “Mario Kart” or “Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild” are recommended.

“Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild” is another fairly lowstakes game that was released in 2017 that has remained a household name well into 2021. In the game, players play as Link, who has woken up from a 100-year sleep and must work to regain his memories. While it is an adventure game including enemies and combat, it is fairly low-stakes, and after dying, Link respawns almost immediately.

“There are ways in which people try to feel less distress that are not as healthy,” Coifman says. “We know those are also increasing right now, so that’s why there’s increased reports of substance overdoses, heightened reports of feeling depressed and hopeless. Often, those kinds of feelings make us often engage in behaviors that are bad for us [such as] overeating, over consuming in general.”

Coifman hopes students will come out of this pandemic a little healthier, a little happier and a little more themselves.

She wants them to learn to always put their happiness first, not just when they are stuck at home. By deliberately reverting back to healthy habits in times of stress, students can improve their well-being and nostalgic hobbies are more likely to replace unhealthy habits.

“It is really useful to find things that bring you joy and pleasure that are also good for you,” Coifman says. “There’s a lot of very, very good science that suggests that having those experiences in times of great stress is part of what helps you adapt and adjust in a healthy way to those stressors. And so it can be quite protective. Nostalgia is good, it’s safe. It can help us make our way through this.”

Kennedy recommends “Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild” to people who have only recently started picking up video games because of its seemingly endless possibilities but cautions players for that same reason as it can be overwhelming.

“It’s good for people who are just getting into gaming, but it might be a little expansive,” she says. “It’s not self-contained.

The opportunities are endless. You can just ride around on a horse for hours, and I think that’s really comforting for some people.”

Coping mechanisms, even subconscious ones, are all about comfort. Coifman suggests that by actively seeking out and fostering good habits, students can learn to make themselves feel good during the pandemic in hopes that those habits will stick around later in their lives.

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Holly Liptak | hliptak@kent.edu

The People Who Kept the Lights On Without warning, America’s frontline workers supported communities through 2020

WORDS BY Terry Lee III ILLUSTRATION BY Paige Gaskins

“We all felt like nobody was taking it seriously.”

SABRINA SCOTT

HE PANDEMIC SHOOK AMERICA, AND. we were all but ready for it. The world as we knew it was turned upside down.

T

On top of everything, the world needed to find a way to function without one of human’s basic needs: other humans.

Disposable products like paper towels and toilet paper became sought after like collector’s items. The aisles of grocery stores held air upon the shelves where essential items once sat.

We FaceTimed, held Zoom meetings and saw each other from behind glass panes. Any way we could have human interaction became integral to our livelihood. What was essential was subjective and remained undefined.

Schools, communities and some businesses would never dream to transition online unless they needed to. Well, the need came, and we saw how it impacted our economy.

The ability to adapt has become an essential part of a functioning business.

On the frontlines of the pandemic, many Americans found themselves disoriented and out of work. While America looked for economic and/or humanistic methods of action, some kept working to keep food on our tables and electricity running through our homes.

At the beginning, essential meant food, health care and distance. As the pandemic continued, what some considered essential changed.

Nobody knew what should or should not be OK. We did not know what would spread the virus or what would protect us from it. Earth fell into turmoil.

Some of us continued to bunker down while others went out in public settings. What seems or looks taboo can now be many different things.

Due to our service-based economy, we found ways to reopen restaurants, bars and coffee shops.

In the blink of an eye, a grocery store employee became as important as a hospital doctor. Caretakers of the elderly became just as important as the scientists who would search for the vaccine. A food service worker that prepared takeout food for all of us stood equal to the organizations informing us of America’s state. No matter what size the cog was, it needed to keep turning for the mechanism to work.

When push came to shove, we learned that what America really relies on is our people.

Without working physical hands we cannot make the cogs turn. Some businesses made the switch to online and flourished because of it. Other businesses could not be transitioned as easily or at all.

What needs to be in brick and mortar has now fallen into question.

Among the troopers on the frontlines of the pandemic, we find Sabrina Scott.

Scott worked at Starbucks when America went into lockdown.

“Each store voted to see if it stayed open,” she says. Whether or not the store remained open depended on a majority rule-vote from the

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employees. In Scott’s case, her store decided to stay open and take a temporary pay raise.

Scott felt concerned for her coworkers as well as herself. “Two of my [former] coworkers had asthma, so we were concerned,” she says.

With a surge of customers amid the crisis, business became non-stop. “All of the other stores in the area closed, and we got all of their customers,” Scott says.

At the time, Scott’s store offered free small coffees to nurses and other essential workers.

Business multiplied, which coincided with the pressure of the position. “We all felt like nobody was taking it seriously,” Scott says.

Since the inside of the store remained closed to customers, patrons would drive up to the window, sometimes even maskless.

Scott felt she and her coworkers were taking everything seriously, but the customers were not. “Every thirty minutes a timer went off and we all had to stop what we were doing and wash our hands,” Scott says.

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She left Starbucks in August in search of a better paying job. Since her role as a barista, Scott has started a new job at a grocery store.

She remains an essential part of the wheels that keep us going by tending registers and stocking and assisting the baker at the store.

Scott was among those who stepped up to the plate out of necessity. America had no relief, and we did not have anything to bank on either. Nurses, truck drivers and baristas were just a few of the humans that worked double shifts to keep America moving.

We all heard at one point that we did not need to wear masks. Then, masks became mandated. New requirements for entry into stores sparked uneasy tensions between humans.

We did not understand March 1, 2020, that the virus was airborne. Some speculated that the virus might spread through surfaces.

People wore gloves to protect themselves.

Hand sanitizer flew off the shelves. I would be lying if I said I did not disinfect a bag of potato chips.

Faulty leadership presented no precedent for

troubling times. We had no gameplan, and it showed.

While we used technology to help aid shoddy communication, we all were reminded of the importance of real humans making real things happen. To this day, essential workers still brave this ever-changing, taunting world, and for that, we all thank you.

We are all living through what we could only picture in horrific tales we read in history class. Every move and step we take is recorded in one way or another. Whether individually or as a society, how we choose to react to calamity will be observed by future generations.

Terry Lee III | tlee32@kent.edu

Ray’s Place Downtown Kent, OH.

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