Michaelmas Term 2012 | Cambridge Union

THE TERMCARD

CAMBRIDGE UNION SOCIETY

MICHAELMAS 2012 PRESIDENT

AUSTIN MAHLER TRINITY HALL

SPEAKERS OFFICER ANNA STANSBURY ST JOHN’S COLLEGE

TREASURER

CASEY SWERNER ST JOHN’S COLLEGE

DEBATING OFFICER JOEL FENSTER SELWYN COLLEGE

VICE-PRESIDENT ALEX FORZANI CHRIST’S COLLEGE

EXECUTIVE OFFICER JOEL MOSS FITZWILLIAM COLLEGE

ENTS OFFICER MATEJ JOVANOVIC CLARE COLLEGE

DEBATING OFFICER TAHLEEL LAHTEEF SELWYN COLLEGE

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CONTENTS Join The Union President’s Welcome Term Planner

8 9 10

Michaelmas Term

13

Corporate Responsibility Debate Live Music in the Bar Jazz and Cocktails Pub Quiz

14 16 17 17

Capitalism Debate Acoustic Night College Representatives Meeting Comedy Night DJ and Drinks Competitive Debating Launch High Sheriff of Cambridgeshire’s Legal Conference Meet the Officers Pub Quiz Debating Workshop Cocktail Workshop Princess Basmah Bint Saud

18 20 20 21 21 22

Music Industry Debate Freshers’ Ball Radhanath Swami Bill Oddie Pub Quiz Debate Workshop US Presidential Candidate Debate Screening Cocktail Workshop

26 28 29 29 30 30 31

No Confidence Debate Jazz and Cocktails Free Zumba Classes Free Yoga Classes Olympics Forum Dambisa Moyo US Presidential Candidate Debate Screening Debating Workshop Cocktail Workshop

32 34 34 34 36 36 37

22 23 23 24 24 25

31

37 37

66 5

6

Class Debate Oktoberfest Free Yoga Classes Rupert Everett Members’ Business Meeting Pub Quiz Debating Workshop Cocktail Workshop

38 40 41 41 42 42 43 43

US Election Debate College Representatives Meeting Andy McNab Free Zumba Classes Free Yoga Classes Where next for the Eurozone?

US Election Party Debating workshop Cocktail Workshop

44 46 46 47 47 48 48 49 49

Comedy Debate Bill Bryson

50 52

Foreign Policy Debate College Representatives Meeting Ambassador Louis Susman Salsa Class Cocktail Workshop

54 56 56 57 57

Gender Debate Antonio Carluccio Cocktail Workshop The Rt. Hon John Bercow MP

58 60 60 61

Free Speech Debate

62

Members’ Benefits Treasurer’s Treats Rooms and Facilities Getting Involved Competitive Debating Who’s Who Union Thanks President’s Thanks

65 66 68 70 72 74 76 77

THE UNION’S OPEN PERIOD THURSDAY 27TH SEPTEMBER – FRIDAY 12TH OCTOBER Get a taste of the Union for free! For the first fortnight of term, we are opening all our debates and speaker events to all members of the University of Cambridge and Anglia Ruskin University, so come along to discover the Union for yourself, even if you haven’t yet joined.

After Friday the 12th of October, all our debates and speaker events will only be open to Union members. Yoga and Zumba classes as well as the use of the facilities will also be free for Union members only. The Freshers’ Ball tickets are free and available for new members only.

Discounted full membership will still be available until the 14th of October. See page 8 for more details on membership prices.

Join the Union JOIN THE BIGGEST SOCIETY IN CAMBRIDGE Are you a student or staff member at Cambridge University or Anglia Ruskin University? With unrivalled debates, speaker events, social ents, and the cheapest bar around, full membership is a great investment that works out to about £1 a week for a 3-year degree. It’s cheaper than a May Ball ticket, and lasts a lifetime.

Join us Behind the Round Church 3 Ways to Join Full Membership – only £150 before 4th October – All membership rights during your time at Cambridge, and upgrade to lifetime membership when you leave (just update your details). £160 until 14th October, £175 (normal price) thereafter.

Annual Membership - £75 before 4th October – expires one year from joining. £80 until 14th October, £90 (normal price) thereafter.

Access scheme – if you receive a Newton Trust Bursary or Full Government Grant, you can join for life at the Annual Membership rate - just bring proof of your grant to the main office to get your membership upgraded.

WWW.CUS.ORG/JOIN E-mail info@cus.org with any queries.

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President’s Welcome Welcome to Michaelmas 2012 at the Union Society!

If you’re a returning member, welcome back! If you’re new, welcome to the Union Society. Now that you’ve got this book in your hand, you probably know what the Union is, and I hope you’ve already joined.

This term promises top-notch speakers, controversial debates, and enough ents to keep your mind off work – I’ll let the termcard speak for itself!

First I want to take a moment to thank you and members like you. While officers put in weeks of their summers and holidays to bring you the term, they get recognised at the back of this book. It’s the members, though, who really keep the Union Society running. Whether you’re engaging a speaker with a question, challenging a debater, dancing to an Oompah band, voting in an election, or just buying a drink in the bar, you are keeping the Union Society relevant and vibrant. Thank you for taking part, and thank you for making your Union Society the best it can be.

The Union Society is run by members for members: if you ever have any questions, you need only ask! The committee and I are always happy to chat over a panini in the coffee shop or a drink at the bar.

I hope you have a great year and a great term. Without further ado, I present Michaelmas at the Cambridge Union Society!

Austin Mahler President, Michaelmas 2012

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MEET THE OFFICERS 8.00PM

BASMAH BINT SAUD 6.00PM DEBATING WORKSHOP 7.00PM COCKTAIL WORKSHOP 9.00PM

MUSIC INDUSTRY 7.30PM

ACOUSTIC NIGHT (AFTER DEBATE)

CAPITALISM 7.30PM

THU

COLLEGE REPS MEETING 5.00PM

COMEDY NIGHT 8.00PM

COLLEGE REPS MEETING 5.00PM

FRI

FRESHERS’ BALL 9.00PM

DJ AND DRINKS 8.00PM

COMPETITIVE DEBATING LAUNCH 7.00PM

SUN

WEEKLY

SPECIAL SAT

FORUM

ENT

BILL ODDIE 7.30PM

DEBATING W’SHOP 7.00PM US PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE SCREENING 7.00PM COCKTAIL W’SHOP 9.00PM

NO CONFIDENCE 7.30PM

COLLEGE REPS MEETING 5.00PM JAZZ AND COCKTAILS 9.00PM

OPEN PERIOD ENDS

ZUMBA 7.00PM

YOGA 12.00PM

DAMBISA MOYO 5.00PM US PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE SCREENING 7.00PM PUB QUIZ 9.00PM

DEBATING WORKSHOP 7.00PM COCKTAIL WORKSHOP 9.00PM

CLASS 7.30PM

COLLEGE REPS MEETING 5.00PM

OKTOBERFEST 9.00PM

YOGA 12.00PM

RUPERT EVERETT 7.30PM

22 23 24 25 26 27 28

OLYMPICS PANEL 7.30PM

PUB QUIZ 9.00PM

15 16 17 18 19 20 21

RADHANATH SWAMI 7.30PM

PUB QUIZ 9.00PM

8 9 10 11 12 13 14

HIGH SHERIFF OF C’SHIRE’S LEGAL CONFERENCE 9.00AM TO 2.00PM

FRESHERS’ FAIR

TERM BEGINS FRESHERS’ FAIR

WED

SPEAKER

DEBATE

2 3 4 5 6 7

PUB QUIZ 9.00PM

JAZZ AND COCKTAILS 9.00PM

1

TUE

MON

CAMBRIDGE UNION SOCIETY TERM PLANNER MICH 2012

WEEK 0/1

WEEK 1/2

WEEK 2/3

WEEK 3/4

10

11

WEEK 4/5

WEEK 5/6

WEEK 6/7

WEEK 7/8

WEEK 8/9

FOREIGN POLICY 7.30PM

GENDER 7.30PM

DEBATING WORKSHOP 7.00PM COCKTAIL WORKSHOP 9.00PM

DEBATING WORKSHOP 7.00PM COCKTAIL WORKSHOP 9.00PM

PUB QUIZ 9.00PM

SALSA CLASS 7.00PM

BILL BRYSON 7.30PM

COMEDY 7.30PM

DEBATING WORKSHOP 7.00PM COCKTAIL WORKSHOP 9.00PM

US ELECTION PARTY ALL NIGHT

ECONOMICS FORUM 6.00PM

YOGA 12.00PM

YOGA 12.00PM

ZUMBA 7.00PM

COLLEGE REPS MEETING 5.00PM

ZUMBA 7.00PM

2 3 4

COLLEGE REPS MEETING 5.00PM ANDY MCNAB 7.30PM

ZUMBA 7.00PM

YOGA 12.00PM

ZUMBA 7.00PM

YOGA 12.00PM

DEBATING W’SHOP 7.00PM

FREE SPEECH 7.30PM

TERM ENDS

OFFICER ELECTIONS

COCKTAIL W’SHOP 9.00PM

JOHN BERCOW 7.30PM

26 27 28 29 30 31 1

PUB QUIZ 9.00PM

19 20 21 22 23 24 25

COLLEGE REPS MEETING 5.00PM ANTONIO CARLUCCIO 7.30PM OFFICER HUSTINGS

NOMINATIONS CLOSE

12 13 14 15 16 17 18

COLLEGE REPS MEETING 5.00PM CAMBRIDGE IV BEGINS 3.00PM

NOMINATIONS OPEN`

5 6 7 8 9 10 11

29 30 31 1

US ELECTION 7.30PM

DEBATING WORKSHOP 7.00PM COCKTAIL WORKSHOP 9.00PM

PUB QUIZ 9.00PM

MEMBERS’ BUSINESS MEETING 5.30PM

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THE TERMCARD

CAMBRIDGE UNION SOCIETY

MICHAELMAS 2012

THIS HOUSE BELIEVES THAT TOO MANY COMPANIES ARE ONLY PAYING LIP SERVICE TO THE GREEN AGENDA Craig Bennett Director of Policy and Campaigns for Friends of the Earth.

Adam Booth PhD student in environmental engineering at Cambridge University and a prominent student campaigner and political activist.

Ramon Arratia European Sustainability InterfaceFLOR.

Director,

DELOITTE DEBATE Tim Yeo MP MP for Suffolk South and Chair of the Energy and Climate Change Committee.

Heather Hancock Managing Director, Brand and Communications and Global Leader, Brand for Deloitte Touche Tohmatsu.

Jonathan Neame Chief Executive of Shepherd Neame Limited.

THURSDAY 27th SEPTEMBER 7.00pm 15

Live Music in the Bar Friday 28th September, 8.00pm For Internationals, Graduates and anyone else already in Cambridge. Get your first taste of the Union bar and listen to some of Cambridge’s best live music acts.

Jazz and Cocktails Monday 1st October, 9.00pm The Union unveils its new cocktail menu for the term. With live music all night and 2 for £6 on any cocktail, it’s a great way to start off the term.

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Pub Quiz Tuesdays, 8.00pm Grab a group of friends and head over to the Union Bar for a weekly fix of trivia. Make sure you’ve brushed up on everything from Roman Emperors to past winners of the FA Cup. Entry is only £1 per person, and the winning team shares half the pool. If you miss it, this event will be every Tuesday at the Union Bar.

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THIS HOUSE BELIEVES CAPITALISM HAS FAILED Professor Andrew Kliman Professor Kliman is a Lecturer in economic theory at Pace University and the author of several books on Marxism, including Reclaiming Marx’s Capital in which he defends the thinker’s labour theory.

Leo Impett Leo Impett is a second-year Engineering student from Cambridge, Secretary of the Cambridge University Communist Society and of the Cambridge branch of the Communist Party of Britain.

Robert Griffiths Robert Griffiths is the General Secretary of the Communist Party of Britain. He worked as a research officer for Plaid Cymru before joining the CPB in 1984. He has consistently stood as a parliamentary candidate in South Wales.

John Longworth John Longworth is the Director General of the British Chambers of Commerce. Over the course of his career, he has served as a Board Director of Asda Group, Tesco and the CWS Ltd.

Madsen Pirie Dr Pirie is President of the Adam Smith Institute, a think tank that advocates classical liberalism. He has worked in the United States Congress and advised former Conservative Prime Minister Sir John Major.

Dr Linda Yueh Dr Yueh is a fellow in Economics at St. Edmund Hall, Oxford where she directs the China Growth Centre. In addition to hosting Economic Edge for Bloomberg TV, she has advised the World Bank and the European Commission.

THURSDAY 4th OCTOBER 2012 7.30pm 19

Acoustic Night Thursday 4th October, after debate.

With a relaxed live acoustic set, this is the best place to continue your night after the debate and make the most of the great drinks deals on offer. Fancy going out instead? Buy a drink at the bar and get ÂŁ2 entry to Lola Lo.

College Representatives Meeting Every Friday, 5.00pm Have a say at your Union, become a college representative if you would like to share your ideas. 5.00PM in the bar, pizza provided. See page 70 for more details.

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Comedy Night Friday 5th October, 8.00pm Showcasing various acts.

DJ and Drinks Saturday 6th October, 8.00pm Make the most of your Saturday night by hitting the Union bar. With fantastic drinks deals and a great DJ set, this is the perfect way to end your Freshers’ Week.

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Competitive Debating Launch Sunday 7th October, 7.00pm Ever thought of competitive debating or public speaking? Please join us in the Cambridge Union Society’s main chamber at 7pm for the first debating workshop of the year. Every year, we run an enjoyable series of expert workshops to take you from the very start of debating right up to the most advanced tools and techniques you will need to excel. We teach you how to construct arguments, present them eloquently and straw-man with style! The first workshop will hope to give you a taster of what our wider workshop has to offer. No previous experience in debating is required - all are welcome so please come along.

High Sheriff of Cambridgeshire’s Legal Conference Monday 8th October, 9:00am-2.00pm The Cambridge Union Society is proud to host, in conjunction with the High Sheriff of Cambridgeshire, a conference which will examine whether the preconceptions and prejudices of society and the establishment fail young people. Panellists will include Max Hill QC (Chairman, Criminal Bar Association), the Rt Hon Sir Anthony Hooper (Lord Justice of Appeal), Martina Milburn CBE (Chief Executive of the Prince’s Trust), Professor Rod Morgan (Emeritus Professor of Criminal Justice at Bristol University), Sir Hugh Orde OBE QPM (Chairman, Association of Chief Police Officers), Professor Lawrence Sherman (Wolfson Professor of Criminology, University of Cambridge) and Peter Hitchens (Author and Mail on Sunday Journalist). The conference will be chaired by Baroness Cohen of Pimilco, a Labour peer in the House of Lords, who studied law at Newnham College, Cambridge.

The conference is open to students.

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Meet the Officers Tuesday 9th October, 8.00pm The Union is a charity run for students by students: we rely on a team of enthusiastic volunteers to continue putting on amazing debates, speaker events and social events. Getting involved can be a fun, rewarding experience, and there’s something for everyone, whether you have a lot of time to dedicate or just the occasional evening. Come along to our Freshers’ Squash to grab a drink with the current team and hear more about the wide range of opportunities on offer.

Pub Quiz Tuesdays at 9.00pm Grab a group of friends and head over to the Union Bar for a weekly fix of trivia. Make sure you’ve brushed up on everything from Roman Emperors to past winners of the FA Cup. Entry is only £1 per person, and the winning team shares half the pool. If you miss it, this event will be every Tuesday at the Union Bar.

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Debating Workshop Wednesdays, 7.00pm Every Wednesday from 7-9pm the Cambridge Union Society host their weekly competitive public speaking and debating workshop. We have our expert mentors coaching you on all things debating. Whether you are a beginner or a pro at British Parliamentary Debating we will have a place for you at our workshops. They are fun, social and the perfect launch pad for prospective debaters to learn their craft and hopefully make the Cambridge Union Society Debating Team.

Cocktail Workshop Wednesdays at 9.00pm What’s the difference between a Caipirinha and a Cuba Libre? Ever wondered how to make a dry martini, shaken, but not stirred? Simply turn up to the Bar to take part in our weekly Cocktail Workshops and learn how to mix drinks. Entry is £10 for members and £15 for non-members - make at least 4 cocktails and drink what you make. Book early: places are limited!

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Princess Basmah Bint Saud From Arab Spring to European Spring to global crisis: what I’d change about all our countries Wednesday 10nd October, 6.00pm Her Royal Highness Princess Basmah Bint Saud Bin Abdulaziz is the youngest daughter of King Saud of Saudi Arabia and the niece of the reigning King Faisal. A businesswoman, humanitarian, journalist and blogger, she campaigns for peaceful reform in the Kingdom and elsewhere in the world where inequality and injustice remain. She will confront the realities of social and political life in Saudi Arabia and discuss her blueprint for its future.

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THIS HOUSE BELIEVES THE MUSIC INDUSTRY IS MORE INDUSTRY THAN MUSIC Pete Waterman Pete Waterman is a record producer, songwriter, DJ and television producer. He has scored twenty two UK number one singles with his acts, including Kylie Minogue, Steps, Rick Astley, and Cliff Richard.

Ben Scarr Benjamin started out distributing yers for club nights when he was about 18 years old. He now works as an Artists and Repertoire Manager at Mercury Records looking after their artists and music.

Arthur Boulton Arthur Boulton was the longest serving member of staff at the BRIT School. He was part of the original team given the task of researching and designing the School’s curriculum.

Andy Saunders Andy Saunders has over 20 years of experience in the UK music industry. His company provides communications strategy for some of the biggest names in the music industry including Universal and Ministry of Sound.

Austin Daboh Austin Daboh is the music producer at BBC1 Xtra. He leads a music team which has launched some of today’s biggest acts including Jessie J and Tinie Tempah.

Jazzie B Jazzie B is a founding member of Soul II Soul, famous for international hits such as ‘Keep on Moving’ and ‘Back to Life’. He now runs a successful independent label called Soul II Soul Recordings.

Colin Lester Colin Lester is the manager of some of the UK’s largest .Pop and Rock music acts, including Craig David, Travis and the Arctic Monkeys.

Bruce Dickinson Bruce Dickinson is the lead vocalist for heavy metal band Iron Maiden.

Besides chart-topping hits, he has risen to fame as a philanthropist, pilot, fencer, and writer.

THURSDAY 11th OCTOBER 2012 7.30pm 27

The President and Officers of the Cambridge Union Society Present the

2012 Saturday Freshers’ Ball 13 October th

Black and White on Saturday 13th October we welcome you to the Freshers’ Black-and-White Ball. Tickets are free for new members and guaranteed to the first 100 who join. Go to www.facebook. com/thecambridgeunion to find out more!

Sponsored by

His Holiness Radhanath Swami Monday 15th October, 7:30pm Radhanath Swami is a Vaishnava sanyassin (a monk in a Krishna-bhakti lineage) and teacher of the devotional path of Bhakti-yoga. He is author of ‘The Journey Home’, a memoir of his search for spiritual truth.

His teachings draw from the sacred texts of India such as the Bhagavad-gita, Srimad Bhagavatam, and Ramayana and aim to reveal the practical application of the sacred traditions, while focusing on the shared essence which unites apparently disparate religious or spiritual paths. He was taught by A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada, the founder of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness.

Bill Oddie Tuesday 16 October, 7.30pm th

Bill Oddie is an author, broadcaster and comedian.

He studied English Literature at Pembroke College, Cambridge and was a member of the Footlights. His comedy career on the BBC included the series ‘I’m Sorry I’ll Read That Again’ and ‘The Goodies’. He is also a keen birdwatcher and has co-produced the biannual BBC Springwatch/Autumnwatch programmes.

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Pub Quiz Tuesdays, 9.00pm Grab a group of friends and head over to the Union Bar for a weekly fix of trivia. Make sure you’ve brushed up on everything from Roman Emperors to past winners of the FA Cup. Entry is only £1 per person, and the winning team shares half the pool. If you miss it, this event will be every Tuesday at the Union Bar.

Debate Workshop Every Wednesday, 7.00pm

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Every Wednesday from 7-9pm the Cambridge Union Society host their weekly competitive public speaking and debating workshop.

We have our expert mentors coaching you on all things debating. Whether you are a beginner or a pro at British Parliamentary Debating we will have a place for you at our workshops. They are fun, social and the perfect launch pad for prospective debaters to learn their craft and hopefully make the Cambridge Union Society Debating Team.

US Presidential Candidate Debate Screening Wednesday 17th October, 7.00pm Who really has the answers for America?

Democrats Abroad UK and the Union Society will be combining US Politics and the spirit of debate to bring you viewings of the US presidential candidate debates.

The screenings are open to all!

Cocktail Workshop Wednesdays, 9.00pm What’s the difference between a Caipirinha and a Cuba Libre? Ever wondered how to make a dry martini, shaken, but not stirred? Simply turn up to the Bar to take part in our weekly Cocktail Workshops and learn how to mix drinks. Entry is £10 for members and £15 for non-members - make at least 4 cocktails and drink what you make. Book early: places are limited!

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THIS HOUSE HAS NO CONFIDENCE IN HER MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT Emma Reynolds MP Emma Reynolds is the Labour MP for Wolverhampton North East and Shadow Minister for Europe. Prior to entering parliament, she worked for the Party of European Socialist and as a special adviser to Geoff Hoon.

Yasmin Qureshi MP Yasmin Qureshi has been the Labour MP for Bolton South East since 2010.

She previously chaired the Human Rights and Civil Liberties Working Group of the Association of Muslim Lawyers and was President of the Pakistan Club (UK). She is one of the first female Muslim MPs.

TBC This speaker is still to be confirmed.

Lembit Opik Lembit Opik is a former Leader of the Welsh Liberal Democrats and was MP for Montgomeryshire from 1997 until 2010. He recently co-authored a book called “The Alternative View” discussing the future of the Liberal Democrats.

Robert Wilson MP Robert Wilson has been a Conservative MP for Reading East since 2005. He is a member of the Education and Skills Select Committee, and since 2010 has been PPS to Jeremy Hunt.

Jenny Willott MP Jenny Willott is the Liberal Democrat MP for Cardiff Central and is an assistant government whip. She has previously worked for several charities including Banardo’s and Unicef UK.

THURSDAY 18th OCTOBER 2012 7.30pm 33

Jazz and Cocktails Friday 19th October, 9.00pm Come and join us as the Union is transformed into Cambridge’s hottest jazz club. Whether you’re a jazz expert, or know nothing about it, this music is guaranteed to get you moving. Sit back, relax, and choose from our sophisticated range of cocktails; at only £3 each! Featuring some of the finest live jazz musicians Cambridge has to offer, this will be an evening you won’t want to miss.

Free Zumba Classes Saturdays at 7.00pm Where can you find samba, salsa, martial arts moves, as well as squats and lunges? For those who are fans of Latin American dances as well as keeping fit at the same time, come to our zumba classes every Saturday at 7pm.

Members only.

Free Yoga Classes Sunday at 12.00pm Recover from the week (and prepare yourself for the next one) by attending our therapeutic class. Our instructors will help you improve your core strength and relax at the same time, all levels of experience are welcome.

Members only.

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Olympics Panel with Greg Rutherford, Tim Baillie, and Etienne Stott Mon 22nd October 7:30pm Discuss the impact and effects of the Olympics with medallists from a range of sports. What does it mean to be a competitor? Are the Olympics about watching or taking part? Have your questions answered by the people who know it best.

Dambisa Moyo Tuesday 23rd October, 5.00pm Dr Dambisa Moyo is an internationally renowned economist, named by Time Magazine as one of the 100 most influential people in the world. Initially rising to prominence with the controversial New York Times bestseller “Dead Aid: Why Aid Is Not Working And How There Is A Better Way For Africa”, she has become one of the world’s most sought-out and outspoken thinkers on development and the global economy. She will speak on the greatest commodity rush of all time – China’s race for resources – and its massive geopolitical and economic consequences.

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US Presidential Candidate Debate Screening Wednesday 25th October, 7.30pm Who really has the answers for America?

Democrats Abroad UK and the Union Society will be combining US Politics and the spirit of debate to bring you viewings of the US presidential candidate debates. The screenings are open to all!

Debating Workshop Wednesday 24th October, 7.00pm Every Wednesday from 7-9pm the Cambridge Union Society host their weekly competitive public speaking and debating workshop.

We have our expert mentors coaching you on all things debating. Whether you are a beginner or a pro at British Parliamentary Debating we will have a place for you at our workshops. They are fun, social and the perfect launch pad for prospective debaters to learn their craft and hopefully make the Cambridge Union Society Debating Team.

Cocktail Workshop Wednesday 25th April, 7.30pm What’s the difference between a Caipirinha and a Cuba Libre? Ever wondered how to make a dry martini, shaken, but not stirred?

Simply turn up to the Bar to take part in our weekly Cocktail Workshops and learn how to mix drinks. Entry is £10 for members and £15 for non-members - make at least 4 cocktails and drink what you make. Book early: places are limited!

37

THIS HOUSE BELIEVES CLASS RUNS BRITAIN Prof. Daniel Dorling Professor Dorling lectures in Human Geography at the University of Sheffield. He has produced a map of the North-South divide in Britain and has been dubbed ‘geographer royal by appointment to the left.’

Ken Livingstone Ken Livingstone is a Labour politician who was formerly Mayor of London.

He is a democratic socialist who has described himself as being on the hard left of the Labour Party.

Fiona O’Donnell MP Fiona O’Donnell is the Labour MP for East Lothian. She grew up in a working class family in the Scottish Highlands and served as Shadow Minister for the Natural Environment and Fisheries between October 2011 to June 2012.

Peter Hamilton Peter Hamilton is the Headmaster of Haberdashers’ Aske’s Boys School.

He has extensive experience at private schools, having taught at Westminsiter and Radley.

Peter Saunders Peter Saunders is a researcher on social mobility and welfare. He is a Distinguished Fellow of the University of Sydney and has written widely on the issues surrounding inequality.

Alvin Hall Alvin Hall is an internationally renowned financial educator, television and radio broadcaster, and bestselling author. He was born into a family of farmers and fishermen in rural Florida.

THURSDAY 25th OCTOBER 2012 7.30pm 39

Oktoberfest!

Saturday 27th October Allow us to take you to the world’s largest fair in Munich. For a night, the Union will be transformed into a Bavarian beer hall - Oompah bands, German beers, and a roaring atmosphere. Tickets include a free beer, a bratwurst, and a pretzel, as well as a night of great German music.

Remember to buy your tickets in advance from the oďŹƒce or online.

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Free Yoga Classes Sundays, 12.00pm Recover from the week (and prepare yourself for the next one) by attending our therapeutic class. Our instructors will help you improve your core strength and relax at the same time, all levels of experience are welcome.

Members only.

Rupert Everett Sunday 28th October, 7:30pm Rupert Everett is a British actor who has starred in ‘My Best Friend’s Wedding’, the ‘Shrek’ series, and ‘Shakespeare in Love’. More than an actor, he has made his name as a published novelist, a contributing editro to ‘Vanity Fair’, and author of a screenplay on Oscar Wilde

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Members’ Business Meeting Monday 29th October, 5.30pm Question Officers about the running of the Union and hold them to account.

This is also a fantastic opportunity to give your feedback and ideas, and to have a real impact on the Union’s future.

Pub Quiz Tuesdays at 9.00pm Grab a group of friends and head over to the Union Bar for a weekly fix of trivia. Make sure you’ve brushed up on everything from Roman Emperors to past winners of the FA Cup. Entry is only £1 per person, and the winning team shares half the pool. If you miss it, this event will be every Tuesday at the Union Bar.

42

Debating Workshop Wednesdays, 7.00pm Every Wednesday from 7-9pm the Cambridge Union Society host their weekly competitive public speaking and debating workshop. We have our expert mentors coaching you on all things debating. Whether you are a beginner or a pro at British Parliamentary Debating we will have a place for you at our workshops. They are fun, social and the perfect launch pad for prospective debaters to learn their craft and hopefully make the Cambridge Union Society Debating Team.

Cocktail Workshop Wednesdays, 9.00pm What’s the difference between a Caipirinha and a Cuba Libre? Ever wondered how to make a dry martini, shaken, but not stirred? Simply turn up to the Bar to take part in our weekly Cocktail Workshops and learn how to mix drinks. Entry is £10 for members and £15 for non-members - make at least 4 cocktails and drink what you make. Book early: places are limited!

43

THIS HOUSE WOULD RE-ELECT OBAMA Kevin Connolly Kevin Connolly is currently the BBC’s Jerusalem correspondent. Prior to this, he reported from the United States, during which time he visited 46 out of the 50 states and covered the election of Barack Obama.

Prof. Anthony Badger Professor Badger is the Master of Clare College and the Paul Mellon Professor of American History. His work focuses on the New Deal and President Roosevelt’s response to the Great Depression.

Hadley Freeman Hadley Freeman is an American journalist based in London. She is a columnist for The Guardian and is especially critical of the Republican Party, noting recently that it was ‘hell-bent on self-destruction.’

Ryan Bourne Ryan Bourne is the Head of Economic Research at the Centre of Policy Studies, a think tank which promotes limiting the role of the state. He read Economics at Cambridge, achieving a double ďŹ rst.

Alex Singleton Alex Singleton is the Managing Director of the Singleton Group, a London-based public affairs agency.

He was a Daily Telegraph journalist, Research Director of the Adam Smith Institute and President of the Globalisation Institute.

THURSDAY 1st NOVEMBER 2012 7.30pm 45

College Representatives Meeting Fridays, 5.00pm Have a say at your Union, become a college representative if you would like to share your ideas. 5.00PM in the bar, pizza provided. See page 70 for more details.

Andy McNab Friday 2nd November, 7.30pm

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Andy McNab is a former SAS soldier and now writes books based on his experiences.

Infamous for his involvement in the Bravo Two Zero mission, during which he and six colleagues were detained in Iraq, his autobiography remained at the top of the best-seller list for 18 weeks. Due to the fact that he is wanted by a number of worldwide terrorist organisations, he conceals his identity when speaking. He will be talking about his new book ‘Battle Lines’.

Free Zumba Classes Saturdays, 7.00pm Where can you ďŹ nd samba, salsa, martial arts moves, as well as squats and lunges? For those who are fans of Latin American dances as well as keeping ďŹ t in the same time, come to our zumba classes every Saturday at 7pm.

Free for members only.

Free Yoga Classes Sundays, 12.00pm Recover from the week (and prepare yourself for the next one) by attending our therapeutic class. Our instructors will help you improve your core strength and relax at the same time, all levels of experience are welcome.

Members only.

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Where Next for the Eurozone?

Monday 5th November, 7.30pm Join us on bonfire night to discuss if the Eurozone really will burst into flames.

Can the single currency be saved? If so, will politicians and societies be willing to bear the cost? And how will it affect the rest of the world? A panel of figures from finance, politics, academia and journalism discuss the future of the Eurzone in the wake of the potentially game-changing EU, IMF and World Bank summits in October.

US Election Party Tuesday 6th November Romney or Obama? Come and find out who will run one of the world’s greatest superpowers for the next 4 years, on big screens at the Cambridge Union, with American food and drinks available all night. America’s back!

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Debating Workshop Wednesdays, 7.00pm Every Wednesday from 7-9pm the Cambridge Union Society host their weekly competitive public speaking and debating workshop. We have our expert mentors coaching you on all things debating. Whether you are a beginner or a pro at British Parliamentary Debating we will have a place for you at our workshops. They are fun, social and the perfect launch pad for prospective debaters to learn their craft and hopefully make the Cambridge Union Society Debating Team.

Cocktail Workshop Wednesdays, 9.00pm What’s the difference between a Caipirinha and a Cuba Libre? Ever wondered how to make a dry martini, shaken, but not stirred? Simply turn up to the Bar to take part in our weekly Cocktail Workshops and learn how to mix drinks. Entry is £10 for members and £15 for non-members - make at least 4 cocktails and drink what you make. Book early: places are limited!

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THIS HOUSE BELIEVES THE LAW IS AN ASS

The Cambridge Footlights

Led by Dr Janet O’Sullivan, Cambridge academics and local judges fight to defend the dignity of the law against a comedic onslaught.

THURSDAY 8th NOVEMBER 2012 7.30pm 51

Bill Bryson Monday 12th November, 7.30pm The UK’s biggest selling non-fiction author since official records began, Bill Bryson’s notoriously inquisitive mind has spawned a string of bestsellers covering topics from travel to the English language, Shakespeare to science.

His most popular works include ‘Down Under’, a tale of his exploits in Australia, ‘The Lost Continent’, exploring small-town America in his mother’s Chevy, and the Aventis Prize-winning ‘A Short History of Nearly Everything’. An Anglophile at heart, he was the 11th Chancellor of Durham University and is President of the Campaign to Protect Rural England.

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Find what you are looking for here Come and meet your Deloitte Cambridge team on campus this term and find out more about our Graduate and Undergraduate programmes.

Highlights of our event schedule include:

15th October 2012- Deloitte Careers Evening 24th October 2012- Cambridge University Women in Leadership Drinks Event 29th October 2012- Consulting Careers Dinner 12th November 2012- Deloitte Discovery Cambridge Office 15th November 2012- Technology Careers Dinner For full details of all our events running in Cambridge this term and details of how to register visit www.deloitte.co.uk/graduates/events Careers in Audit ō Tax ō Consulting ō Corporate Finance ō Technology

© 2012 Deloitte LLP. Deloitte LLP is an equal opportunities employer.

Member of Deloitte Touche Tohmatsu Limited

THIS HOUSE WOULD GO TO WAR FOR HUMAN RIGHTS Sir Emyr Jones Parry Sir Emyr Jones Parry has held diplomatic posts in Canada, Madrid and Brussels. He served as UK Permanent Representative to NATO and afterwards as UK Permanent Representative to the United Nations.

Edward Chaplin Edward Chaplin directed the Middle East Section at the Foreign Office and served as British Ambassador to Jordan and post-conflict Iraq where, during the 1980s, he had been briefly kidnapped by Iraqi Revolutionary Guards.

Dr Peter Abbott Dr Peter Abott was the Michaelmas 2000 President of the Union. He was Chief of Staff to the British Ambassador in Washington and is currently the Head of the West Africa Section at the Foreign OďŹƒce. Dr Abbott will be speaking in a personal capacity.

John Baron MP John Baron is the Conservative MP for Bilceray and District. He has been a long-standing critic of our involvement in Afghanistan and was the only Conservative MP to vote against our continued involvement in Afghanistan. He was also the only Conservative MP to vote against a no-y zone in Libya.

THURSDAY 15th NOVEMBER 2012 7.30pm 55

College Representatives Meeting Fridays at 5.00pm Have a say at your Union, become a college representative if you would like to share your ideas. 5.00pm in the bar, pizza provided. See page 70 for more details.

Ambassador Louis Susman Date to be announced Louis Susman is the current United States Ambassador to the United Kingdom and was sworn in on 29th July 2012 by Secretary of State Hilary Clinton . A banker and lawyer with extensive experience, he was formerly Vice Chairman of Citigroup Corporate and Investment Banking.

Before joining Salomon Brothers, he was a senior partner at the St. Louis based law ďŹ rm of Thomson & Mitchell. He has also long been active in the public sector and was appointed by President Ronald Reagan to the U.S. Advisory Commission on Public Diplomacy which provided oversight to the U.S. Information Agency.

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Salsa Class Tuesday 20th November, 7.00pm From beginners to experts, this night of Cuban Salsa promises to be the hottest ticket in town. Learn from the pros and dance the night away to the spicy Latin music.

Cocktail Workshop Wednesdays at 9.00pm What’s the difference between a Caipirinha and a Cuba Libre? Ever wondered how to make a dry martini, shaken, but not stirred? Simply turn up to the Bar to take part in our weekly Cocktail Workshops and learn how to mix drinks. Entry is £10 for members and £15 for non-members - make at least 4 cocktails and drink what you make. Book early: places are limited!

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THIS HOUSE BELIEVES GENDERS EXIST TO OPPRESS CAUSE AND EFFECT OF BINARY GENDER CATEGORIES Susan Brownmiller Susan Brownmiller is an American feminist and author. She is best known for her book ‘Against Our Will: Men, Women, and Rape’ where she describes rape as a conscious process of intimidation by which all men keep all women in a state of fear.

Judith “Jack” Halberstam Judith “Jack” Halberstam is Professor of English and Director of The Center for Feminist Research at the University of Southern California.

Halberstam teaches courses in queer studies and gender theory, and is the author of several books including Female Masculinity and The Drag King Book.

Professor Milton Diamond Professor Diamond is a retired lecturer in anatomy and reproductive biology. He has written extensively on gender issues and specialises in the development of gender identities.

Dr Anne Moir Dr Moir the Founder of Brainsex Matters, an organisation that conducts research into the field of neuropsychology. She gained her doctorate in genetics from Oxford and worked for BBC Panorama.

Catherine Hakim Catherine Hakim is a leading sociologist on the issue of women’s employment. She was previously a Senior Research Fellow at the LSE. A senior fellow in the Center for Policy Studies, she has authored ‘Honey Money: The Power of Erotic Capital.’

THURSDAY 22nd NOVEMBER 2012 7.30pm 59

Antonio Carluccio Friday 23rd November, 7.30pm In 1983 celebrity chef and cookery writer Antonio Carluccio made his first appearance on BBC 2 as he tried to explain to the British public the joys of Italian food and drink. Subsequently he has written several books, published worldwide and made numerous television programmes including the hugely popular Two Greedy Italians. Throughout his career, he has always insisted on the importance of remaining loyal to the ingredients and cooking traditions of his region of Italy. Tonight he will be talking about his forthcoming book ‘A Recipe for Life’.

Cocktail Workshop Wednesdays at 9.00pm What’s the difference between a Caipirinha and a Cuba Libre? Ever wondered how to make a dry martini, shaken, but not stirred? Simply turn up to the Bar to take part in our weekly Cocktail Workshops and learn how to mix drinks. Entry is £10 for members and £15 for non-members - make at least 4 cocktails and drink what you make. Book early: places are limited!

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Rt. Hon John Bercow MP Wednesday 28th November, 7.30pm The Rt. Hon John Bercow MP is the Speaker of the House of Commons. After a career in banking and as a lobbyist, he was elected as a Councillor for the London Borough of Lambeth. He entered parliament as the Conservative MP for Buckingham and was, for a brief spell, the Shadow Minister for Work and Pensions before he was removed from oďŹƒce for ignoring a three-line whip.

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THIS HOUSE BELIEVES THE PUBLIC ISN’T READY FOR FREE SPEECH Austin Mahler Austin Mahler is finishing his term as president of a society dedicated to free speech. Facing the outside, he’s a little concerned by the Real World’s revulsion towards people speaking their minds.

Nigel Warburton Nigel Warburton is a philosopher and Senior Lecturer at the Open University. He has edited many introductory philosophy works and authored Free Speech: A Very Short Introduction.

Kevin Scott Kevin Scott is the Founder of Civil Liberty, an organisation that aims to defend freedom of speech from political correctness. He has been a Regional Organiser for the British National Party.

Kirsty Hughes Kirsty Hughes is the Chief Executive of the Index on Censorship and a Senior Research Associate at the Centre for International Studies at Oxford. She has previously worked at Chatham House and the Institute for Public Policy Research.

Brian Paddick Brian Paddick stood as the Liberal Democrat candidate for Mayor of London in 2008 and in 2012. He was Deputy Assistant Commissioner in London’s Metropolitan Police Service and the UK’s most senior gay police officer until his retirement in 2007.

THURSDAY 29th NOVEMBER 2012 7.30pm 63

THE TERMCARD

CAMBRIDGE UNION SOCIETY

MEMBERS’ BENEFITS

TREASURER’s TREATS Being a member of the Union entitles you to all of these fantastic discounts with local businesses and retailers; make sure you take advantage of them to avoid missing out!

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20% off food all week at Bella Italia and 30% off on Tuesdays.

20% off food all week at Strada and 30% off on Mondays.

20% off food all week at Cafe Rouge and 30% off on Wednesdays.

10% off everything at the Michaelhouse Café.

Choice of free side dish (value of £3.50) with food order at Dojo restaurant present your card when ordering.

10% off at Cambridge Cheese (cash only)

10% off at The Glasworks gym and fitness club. Discount available on all services.

Ask at reception.

15% off parts for the first 2 weeks of term and 10% off parts for the rest of the year at Primo Cycles

50% off everything all week at Wildwood Restaurants

£2 entry to Lola Lo on Thursdays (with purchase of a drink at the Union bar).

20% off for tables booked in advance at Las Iguanas restaurant.

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ROOMS & FACILITIES Most of our rooms are available for our members to use during the day.

The Mountbatten Room is a beautiful drawing room with magazines, music, and comfortable sofas – perfect for reading quietly or socialising with friends. The Kennedy Room and the newly refurbished Societies Room are great places for student organizations to meet. Our rooms are available for hire by members.

The Library The Union is proud to have the newly refurbished Keynes Library at the heart of its historic buildings. With Wi-Fi throughout the library, it is the perfect place to work or read away from the hustle and bustle of college.

The South Room holds the main book collection which is available for borrowing to members. The Fairfax Rhodes Reading Room houses the Fairfax Rhodes rare book collection, a unique collection of antiquarian books in leather bindings.

The Library has the largest borrowable fiction section in Cambridge outside the University Library, so whether you like flipping through old favourites or devouring the latest bestsellers, we are certain that you’ll be able to find something that suits you. We also have sections on English literature and drama, biography, history, sport, politics, economics, and sociology. There is always plenty of working space, and with our central location and our brand new coffee shop serving inexpensive coffee and tea just downstairs, the Union is the ideal place to work.

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The Café We like to consider ourselves the ethical alternative to the soulless coffee chain: our coffee is all fair trade, we recycle almost everything we use and all the profits are ploughed straight back into your Union. With food provided all day long (at subsidised rates for members of course), as well as coffee and tea, this really is the perfect place to work and play.

The Members’ Bar Our bar is the only one to cater to members of the whole university, and the ideal setting for getting to know people outside of College. Recently refurbished, we have some very comfortable leather sofas, two 50-inch plasma TVs and a roaring fireplace for when the nights get cold! With heavily subsidised drinks prices for members and a superb cocktail menu week-round, it’s a great place to meet with friends.

Snooker We have the only two full-sized snooker tables in the centre of Cambridge, for our members’ exclusive free use.

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GETTING INVOLVED The Union is a charity run for students by students: we rely on a team of enthusiastic volunteers to continue putting on amazing debates, speaker events and social events. Getting involved can be a fun, rewarding experience, and there’s something for everyone, whether you have a lot of time to dedicate or just the occasional evening. For advice about what would suit you, contact vicepresident@cus.org.

Elected positions include President, Executive Officer, Speakers Officer, Treasurer, Social Events Officer and six positions on the Supplementary Committee. The named officers are elected a term in advance so that officers have a term as “officers-elects” to prepare. Elections are open to all members; for more information contact vicepresident@cus.org.

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Appointed Positions Appointed positions are decided directly by Standing Committee, and are often jobs that require specialist knowledge in a certain area. These include: • Vice-President • Debating Officers • Secretary • Head of Event Management • Head of Publicity Campus • Head of Publicity Online • Head of Press

• Heads of Recruitment • Speakers’ Guest Liaison • Senior Debates Guest Liaison • Head of AV • Chief Photographer • Women’s Officer • Diversity Officer

Positions available are advertised by email, and are open to all members, but if you have specialist expertise in any of these areas and would like to help out please contact executive@cus.org.

College Representatives College Reps attend a weekly meeting where you can share thoughts on what we are doing well and what we could be doing better. Meetings are relaxed with Pizza and Soft Drinks provided. This is a low commitment role that makes sure the Union provides what members want. There’s no limit on the number of college representatives so if you’re interested please contact executive@cus.org for more details or just turn up in the Bar at 5.00PM on Fridays.

Stewards Stewards are essential for the running of the Union. They volunteer to help with the security, organization and smooth running of events and is a great way of ensuring that you get a good seat. Stewards are rewarded with food and a £5 bar tab per event! We are constantly looking for more stewards, and you can commit to as many or as few events as you wish, so contact our Head of Events Management at hoem@cus.org for more information.

Find out extra information about all of these positions at our Freshers’ Squash or just ask one of the officers.

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COMPETITIVE DEBATING The Cambridge Union Society is one of the world’s oldest and most prestigious debating societies. We remain one of the most successful unions of competitive debaters, participating at the highest level.

Debating at the union not only offers you the chance to participate in debates, but also to improve your public speaking skills and learn to engage an audience. Through representing Cambridge at national and international competitions members visit interesting locations all over the globe, participating in foreign tournaments. No previous experience is necessary, so if you’re interested, be sure to get involved.

Every Wednesday night at 7pm, throughout term, we run debating workshops. These are good practice for the most advanced debaters, or those looking to pick up a new set of skills. The sessions are targeted at those of all levels, and are run by experienced and successful coaches.

Every workshop is followed by a social in the Union’s bar, with discounted drink prices for members of course.

As debaters benefit from subsidised travel around the world and expert coaching, our events are exclusively available to members.

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Domestic Competitions The union sends teams to domestic competitions almost every weekend, with over 200 members being sent throughout the term. These are comprised of a range of speakers, from some of our most experienced debaters, to those with no experience beyond our weekly workshops.

These competitions are not only social events, but an excellent opportunity to improve your skills and visit other parts of the country.

International Competitions Cambridge Debating offers members to chance to travel and debate around the globe. In the past year we have sent teams to Manila, Galway, the USA, and Belgrade, and next year are planning even more foreign ventures. For nearly a century we have also taken part in a tour of the United States, teaching the art of debating to our American compatriots.

How Do You Get Involved In Cambridge Debating?

If you’re interested and want to get involved, or have always felt like trying debating but have never pushed yourself forward, why not come along to a workshop at the start of term?

There are other opportunities to get involved with debating at Cambridge.

The Union also runs the world’s largest schools’ debating competition, with over 750 teams competing last year. You could help spread debating to young students across the country by judging or helping to organise this competition. Throughout Michaelmas, we will be funding members to judge rounds all around Britain. In addition, the Cambridge InterVarsity is one of the largest and most prestigious debating events on the calendar. It attracts teams from the world’s best universities, with opportunities for members to adjudicate various rounds.

If you have any questions at all, please feel free to email the Debating Officer, Joel Fenster and Tahleel Lateef, at debating@cus.org. As the Directors of Debating, it is our job to ensure everyone feels welcome, so please introduce yourselves.

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WHO’S WHO

Union Standing Committee

President AUSTIN MAHLER

Executive Officer JOEL MOSS

Ents Officer MATEJ JOVANOVIC

Vice President ALEX FORZANI

President-Elect BENJAMIN KENTISH

Speakers Officer ANNA STANSBURY

Executive-Elect JOANNA MOBED

Treasurer CASEY SWERNER

Speakers Officer-Elect Treasurer-Elect ALEX PORTER ANASTASIA BOGATYREVA 74

Ents Officer-Elect NATALIA MAJ

Debating Officer JOEL FENSTER

Debating Officer TAHLEEL LAHTEEF

Appointed Positions Chief Photographer: John Jarman Diversity Officer: James McCallion Head of AV: Daniel Hyman Head of Events Management: Matthew Cummins Head of Publicity Campus: Imogen Schön Head of Publicity Online: Chris Douse Head of Press: Sophie Odenthal Head of Press Photography: Jane Stockdale Heads of Recruitment: Emily Gittins & Stephen Squirrell Secretary: Suyin Chalmin-Pui Senior Guest Liaison for Debates: Robert Wilson Senior Guest Liaison for Speakers: Matthew MacLachlan & Raza Habib Women’s Officer: Lauren Steele

Staff Bursar: Colonel William A. Bailey MBE BSC FCMI Office Manager: Victoria Zeitlyn Building Manager: Kelly Collinwood BA Accounts Manager: Dr. David Sellick Bar and Events Manager: James Aldridge FBII Librarian and Archivist: Catherine Wise BA Asst. Bar and Events Manager: Joseph Burman Coffee Shop Manager: Veronika Misinska 75

UNION THANKS Review Committee Dr. Peter Abbott (ex-officio President, Michaelmas 2000) (Chair) Sam Block (ex-officio Director of Debating, 2007-2008) Joshua Blanchard-Lewis (ex-officio Secretary & Vice-President, 2008-2009) Julien Domercq (ex-officio President, Michaelmas 2009) Jan-Jonathan Bock (ex-officio Senior Committee Member, Michaelmas 2009) Rahul Mansigani (ex-officio Treasurer, Easter 2010) Albert Beardow (ex-Speakers officer, Easter 2011)

Trustees Sir Richard Dearlove KCMG OBE MA (Chairman) Dr Nigel Brown OBE MA Mr Nick Butler BA Mr Andy Swarbrick BA FCA Dr Nigel Yandell Ph.D Mr Nick Heath MA FRICS The Hon Daniel Janner QC, MA (Cantab) Janet Turner QC MA

FRIENDS OF THE UNION Alimentum Cambridge Limited Charles Russell LLP Deloitte LLP Elveden Estates Eversheds LLP Kleinwort Benson Mills & Reeve LLP Rathbones Syngenta Thermoteknix Systems Ltd Thanks also to Craig Slade for all his hard work in the design and production of this termcard.

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PRESIDENT’S THANKS Anyone who wants to be involved in the Union needs four groups on their side: Family, other Unionites, Union Staff, and Friends. If you want to do a good job, or at the very least if you want to be a decent human being, you need everyone in the first three groups to become part of the fourth – there’s no other way.

It makes me incredibly happy to know that all the people who have held me up or sat me down were – and are – my friends. From the world’s most supportive parents, who happily put my wishes first and helped me make a life for myself across an ocean and five time-zones, to Leonora and Ian (I hope we’re bragging about one another forever); all the way from my amazing grandparents to Murphy, who has been a friend since puppyhood.

Until this term, the Union has never before seen a group of officers who are so capable of being everyone’s friends. I couldn’t have asked for a more open-minded crowd to keep me on track. Always reasonable, always levelheaded, Alex F has been my right hand calmly steering the Union through safe or turbulent waters. I can rest easy knowing that, under his watchful eye, the Union will weather every storm. Alex P has an uncanny ability to be straightforward and light-hearted with an infectious smile, while Anastasia can find the silver lining any black cloud. Anna never ceases to amaze me – laughing, dancing, and making me laugh when stress would have been high. Her unmatched efficiency has taught the Union new tricks and brought us a great term. Ben has always been able to stay cool, helping me keep it in perspective – I envy the Lent team for a leader like that! Casey has helped bring a human face to the Union: who knew you could get record sponsorship while so laid-back, chill, and in Mexico?

I’ve found more than a friend, but an inspiration in Joanna. I have never known anyone who smilingly and successfully lives so morally and principled a life, and I know I’ve grown from her confidence in the goodness of people.

I can’t thank Joel F enough – without him, there would be no debates. He has gone beyond his office to demand that the Union – and I – do better.

Joel M has been his match, keeping the Union running without complaint and always quick with new ideas. The Union is a much brighter place thanks to Matej, a jack-of-all-trades whose spirit of fun infected tedious summer work. Natalia’s cooperation with Matej and the team has been an example for us all. Tahleel has tirelessly coordinated our competitive debating: he and the convenors have helped the Union keep its charitable status and helped me do my job. Emily and Steve have kept us all in a job by making sure no fresher missed the opportunity to join.

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The last six months have convinced me that the Union staff have the hardest jobs in the world, and nothing I write can show my appreciation for their patience in putting up with the constant turnover, the erratic hours, and the students who far too often take them for granted. Victoria has been watching my back and making the Union run smoothly since I arrived, while Veronika has, in a few months since joining us, accomplished the impossible by revitalising the coffee shop without ever losing her smile.

From afar, Sam has remained an integral and irreplaceable member of the team who deserves more recognition than we ever could give him. While Sam has kept the students afloat, Kelly has almost singlehandedly kept a 150-year-old building standing – no easy task! Joe and James have always been the friendly faces keeping ents alive and keeping committee smiling.

Dave has kept the Union in the black, while Catherine has done, well, everything – to say thank you would be embarrassingly inadequate. When Barnaby isn’t stealing my coffee table, he’s making the summer fun and the students happy. Bill - the lynchpin of the Union who holds the students, staff, and trustees together – deserves special thanks for the tireless unsung work he does. At times he is a task-master and at times a father figure. I will miss our long chats, punting, and his sage-like guidance.

True friends don’t show up only in good times: they stay around when the going gets tough. There’s no space to thank all my true friends. I have Julia to thank for conscience, the Matts for strength. Basit’s ability to keep it real is legendary, and the Dans, Davids, Peter, Toni, and Josh have been mainstays of college life. Calum taught me many lessons about the Union. Soph has kept me going through the best and the worst. Special thanks to the lawyers, and especially to Arjun, Bassant and Nils. Back home Ariel, Blake, Dan, Dashiel, Erik, Jackie, Jeremy, Jesse, Joel, Julia, Kristen, Lily, Maddie, Nat, Peter, Priya, Rohan, Sadev, Tammer, and Yehuda have been my anchors across the ocean. The fact that you will never read this and might not ever have heard of the Union Society has helped me keep everything in perspective.

I don’t know where I’ll be in 20 or 30 years when I find a copy of this termcard in some dusty old box, but I know I will have made it there because of all these people who have become my friends. May the road always rise to meet you, and may the wind always be at your back - unless you’re rowing!

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To find out more go to www.kpmg.co.uk/graduates

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No matter how you slice it, it’s complicated