4 minute read
HOW TO BE A BETTER ALLY
Being an ally to the LGBTQ+ community is doing more than just accepting people for being LGTBQ+. A true ally is always open to learning and uses the information they gather to advocate for the community. It is important for allies to learn the history of LGBTQ+ issues and the significance of those issues. Allies should get their information directly from LGTBQ+ members or sources, not just allies. This is important because people who are just allies and not LGTBQ+ haven’t experienced what it is personally like to be an LGTBQ+ person. Most importantly, allies must ensure that everyone in the LGBTQ+ community is advocated for. Allies need to make sure that they are also advocating for LGBTQ+ members with disabilities and members who are POC. In 2018, Stonewall revealed that 51% of POC LGTBQ+ members reported experiencing racism in the LGTBQ+ community. Experiencing racism in the LGTBQ+ community can cause isolation, mental health issues and loneliness. New research has proven that LGTBQ+ people are more likely to have a disability. There is an estimation that 3-5 million LGTBQ+ people have disabilities. If someone wants to be an ally, they need to support everyone in the LGTBQ+ community. Familiarizing yourself with pronoun usage and new terminology is a huge part of allyship.Take the small step of including your pronouns on your social media bios and in the workplace. Using pronouns can help people who use they/them pronouns or have transitioned their pronouns feel less alienated. A person who identifies as a woman uses pronouns she/her, a person who identifies as a man uses pronouns he/him and someone who is nonbinary, genderqueer, or gender fluid usually goes by they/them. Unfortunately, members of the LGBTQ+ community are still victims of homophobia. It is important to call people out for using homophobic slurs or participating in homophobic behaviors. These people can sometimes be family members which can make it more difficult, but it shouldn’t stop you from educating them. If you are struggling to stand up for someone in the LGBTQ+ community, it may be helpful to provide data about how homophobia has caused damage to LGBTQ+ mental health. According to Mental Health America, 39% of the LGBTQ+ community has reported having mental illness within the past year. LGBTQ+ youth are twice as likely to feel suicidal and over four times as likely to attempt suicide compared to heterosexual youth. Forty-eight percent of transgender adults have considered suicide in the past year compared to four percent of the overal U.S. population.
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Microaggressions
“That’s so gay” or “You’re so gay” This phrase tends to slip through the cracks because it may feel harmless to some cisgender straight people. The problem with this is that it puts acting gay or being gay in a negative context. It is degrading and harmful for people who identify as gay. “No Homo” People typically say this when they are concerned that they said something that makes them be perceived as gay. Similar to the first phrase, it makes it seem like there’s something wrong with being gay and the person who said this doesn’t want to be called “gay” because they think there’s something wrong with it. “You are beautiful for a trans woman” This is very harmful toward trans women because it makes it seem like they are less beautiful for being transgender. Comparing trans women to cisgender woman makes trans women seem inferior to cisgender women. This is degrading and can cause them to question their self worth. “What do you have down there” This is used against transgender people when people try to ask them what genitalia they have. It is very inappropriate and invasive and nobody’s business, but people tend to think it is okay to ask a transgender person what body parts they have. This is dehumanizaing and a way of treating transgender people like they are not human. “Bisexuality doesn’t exist” This one stems from ignorance, denial or a combination of both. People who say this are degrading the identity of someone who identifies as bisexual. Some people think that someone can only be straight or gay. This comment is considered to be biphobic which is showing a dislike or prejudice against bisexual people. “It’s just a phase” This is used to make someone feel like their sexuality isn’t valid. When someone says this they are trying to convince someone that they are straight, causing them to question themselves leading to more confusion. This person is in denial of someone who isn’t straight trying to convince them they are wrong because they don’t want that person to be LGTBQ+. Sources https://www.mhanational.org/issues/lgbtqcommunities-and-mental-health https://www.stonewall.org.uk/sites/default/ files/tackling_homophobic_language_-_ teachers_guide.pdf https://lgbtqia.ucdavis.edu/educated/ words https://www.stonewallscotland.org.uk/ about-us/news/15-things-lgbtq-peoplecolour-want-you-know https://www.lgbtmap.org/lgbt-peopledisabilities
