College Tribune Volume 29, Issue 4 by College Tribune

THE COLLEGE TRIBUNE Staff and students at the Amnesty International & Socialist Workers Student Society Rally for Refugees held on Tuesday October 13th For more, see Politics & Innovation, page 14.

Mixed Bag Budget for Students

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udget 2016 brought with it some measures to assist students, but failed to address the accommodation crisis, according to Marcus O’Halloran, President of UCD Students’ Union (UCDSU). O’Halloran welcomed the increase in the minimum wage and the decrease in the Universal Social Charge (USC), as he identified them as the measures which would be of most benefit to the students of UCD. From January 2016, the minimum wage will rise to €9.15 per hour, a 50c increase from €8.65. Meanwhile, there was

Volume Ouvrage Imleabhar Band 29 Eagrán Nummer Issue Numéro 04 Mardi Dé Máirt Dienstag Tuesday 27 Oktober October Octobre D.Fómhar 15 Independent News for UCD Read More: Visit collegetribune.ie

News

Pg. 3 Semester 1 Exam Timetable Released

stuck in the middle of a national housing crisis, which has divided the two coalition parties on how best to handle the situation. At present, UCDSU’s position is more aligned with Labour and their calls for a rent cap. Meanwhile, Fine Gael are reluctant to interfere in the private market. The dispute is currently being fought at Cabinet level, and there have been reports of a recent flashpoint on the issue between Labour’s Alan Kelly, Minister for the Environment, Community and Local Government, and Fine Gael’s Michael Noonan, Minister for Finance. Both strongly support their own party’s stance on the issue. Noonan’s views on the matter are shared by Enda Kenny. The Taoiseach recently said that “it is very clear that interference in the market to its detriment is not something we should do,” and that “while people are calling for what they call clarity in respect ofcertainty for rent, if you interfere in the wrong way you make matters worse.” Regarding the situation on campus, O’Halloran confirmed he would be meeting with Andrew Deeks, President of UCD, and Gerry O’Brien, UCD’s Bursar, in the next two weeks to discuss the topic. UCDSU has been

Business

Pg. 12 Has Dublin reached peak Buritto?

calling for a sustainable model of campus accommodation to be implemented over the coming years. O’Halloran said that their proposal was receiving political attention. Fianna Fail’s Charlie McConalogue, Spokesperson on Education & Skills, had voiced his support for their solution, while they also received a recent letter of support from Joan Burton, Tánaiste and Minister for Social Protection. He noted that “getting a letter from the Tánaiste was quite positive”, and confirmed that UCDSU is awaiting a response from Fine Gael as to whether or not they will support the union’s calls to deal with the situation. However, his overall view on the situation is that it will take a long time. “It’s continuously a waiting game with student accommodation, since our meeting with Alan Kelly, nothing has come of it. All thepromises that he made haven’t arisen really. And it’s kind of disappointing, but we remain hopeful enough.” When asked about the possibility of UCD re-joining USI, givenhow he is co-operating with them on accommodation, O’Halloran noted that UCDSU is mandated to run a referendum on re-joining it every few years. He said that “nobodies

Cian Carton News Editor approached us about running a referendum to re-join USI.” He also stated that “there’s no desire, really, among students” to re-affiliate with the organisation. As part of UCDSU’s response to the Budget, O’Halloran has been getting involved in on-campus discussions. Last week, he attended a panel analysis on the budget, host by UCD Economics Society (UCD EconSoc), on the 15th October. Paul Dockery, Vice-Auditor of UCD EconSoc, tweeted that O’Halloran stated that there was “nothing for students in Budget 2016.” Both the EconSoc and UCDSU Twitter accounts retweeted this. O’Halloran sought to justify this quotation, by stating that “the Budget didn’t entirely overlook students.” While the Budget has yet to be approved by the government, one of its provisions has already come into effect, as smokers were hit with another 50c increase in the price of a 20 pack of cigarettes. However, it is unlikely that the effects of this measure will be seen on campus, as last year, UCDSU banned the sale of cigarettes within its shops on campus as part of its policy of supporting the UCD Health Promotion Committee’s smoke free campus initiative.

Kevin O’Reilly talks to Wyvern Lingo

Marcus O’Halloran:

a rise in the threshold of eligibility for the USC. It will now be increased to €13,000, from €12,012 per annum. Anyone who earns more than that becomes eligible to pay the tax. Commenting on these two measures, he noted that “the 50 cent rise in the minimum wage was a bonus and the USC decrease was also a bonus.” O’Halloran highlighted the failure to deal with the accommodation crisis for students as the biggest disappointment in the Budget. When asked what provisions he would have liked to have seen himself, O’Halloran replied that “we would have liked to have seen either rent caps or a massive influx of funding for studentaccommodation.” He confirmed that he would be presenting to the Cabinet in the next three weeks on the “shortfall of student accommodation” alongside Kevin Donoghue, President of Union of Students in Ireland (USI). As the Budget has not yet been signed off on, O’Halloran is “hopeful something will be done on it.” For students, the problem is that O’Halloran and Donoghue will be presenting their case to a Cabinet which has very split views on the issue. College students find themselves

THE TRIB

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The cost of living has increased so much in the last year in Dublin especially, it doesn’t exactly counterbalance the rise in the minimum wage.w

Image: Jack Power

Tuesday October 27th

Editorial: Distorting the Truth and Creating a Coup Una Power Editor

hen it comes to the EU we are right to view its institutions and mechanisms with a critical eye; anything of a governing nature should be subject to scrutiny if it is to remain fair, open and efficient. However the EU is a behemoth of governance, whose everyday workings pass the most of us by. We are not in a position to truly evaluate its worth, as we lack the knowledge and insight necessary. So we look to journalists to bridge the gap between us and EU actors. We use their analysis to shape our judgements and understandings surrounding this institute and its performance. But can we trust those journalists to inform us correctly, without unduly colouring our perceptions or manipulating the true image? Rumblings of an effective coup in Portugal have been heard over the last few days, with the Telegraph’s Ambrose Evans-Pritchard boldly announcing

that the EU had crossed “Rubicon as Portugal’s anti-euro Left banned from power”. The article claimed “for the first time since the creation of Europe’s monetary union, a member state has taken the explicit step of forbidding eurosceptic parties from taking office on the grounds of national interest”. The recent legislative elections in Portugal witnessed the ruling right-wing coalition, led by the PSD, fail to retain its overall majority, securing 107 seats out of 230. The leftist parties – the Socialist Party, the Left Block and the Communist Party – man aged, between them, to win 122. Reading the piece in the Telegraph you would believe that the President of Portugal had refused to appoint a Left-Wing Coalition government in order to appease Brussels and financial markets. Evans, a noted cynic of all things EU, says the President has flown in the face of democracy and the people’s wishes with this move. But this is, at best, an overly simplistic interpretation of

matters, or, at worst, wilful misconstruing of facts; and it has allowed both left and right wing commentators and politicians, such as Owen Jones and Eurosceptic Dan Hannon, to bolster their agendas among the public. The Portuguese elections took place on the 4th of October, and in the two and a half weeks that passed no government was formed. The leftist parties had no election pact regarding coalition formation and, while negotiations have taken place, there has traditionally been tension between these three groups. So it came that PSD President Anibal Cavaco Silva invited Passos Coelho to continue as Prime Minister, as is his constitutional right. The President, perhaps reasonably, justified this move on the basis of precedent. The invitation to form a government has always been issued to the party which had won the most seats, even if they did not hold a majority – such as the current case with the PSD. It is also worth noting that in 2009 President Silva extended this invitation to José Sócrates, leader of the PS, despite his party not

holding a majority. Furthermore, and contra to the coup narrative, the invitation to form a coalition sets nothing in stone. Coelho has 10 days to form a Programme for Government to be presented to the members of parliament. Should an absolute majority of members reject the proposal it is then likely that PS leader António Costa will attempt to form a government. What does this mean for the perceived influence of the EU and financial markets? The above would suggest that, regardless of his own political leanings and ideologies, the President acted in accordance with the structures of his own country rather than those of the EU or other external forces. What is currently happening in Portugal, whether the decision by the President is the right one or not, is borne out of internal factors. The EU is a complex mechanism, ever expanding its remit and power. It needs to be observed intently and met with criticism where due. But skewed reporting, such as this, does no favours for its citizens and merely serves as a football for political kick-about.

as a branch of government. Those of you studying politics and international relations will be familiar with the theory of the separation of powers. The three arms which make up a democratic government are the legislature, the executive and the judiciary. Each plays a vital role in the day to day running of the state and all should be independent of one another. It goes without saying that there would be a problem if the executive were able to lean on the judiciary, for example if a member of cabinet were able to request that a judge rule in his favour. This is where the press should come into play. Th press serves as a reminder to thoe in power that they are accountable. This filters down to all levels,

including here in Belfield. At a local level, the press should do the same. But it’s also important to remember that there’s a big distinction between local and national. I’ve spoken to a lot of people since taking on the role of editor of this paper, and the impression that many people have is that we at the College Tribune are the ‘anti-paper’ (I’ve made that up, but it fits). This idea does have a grain of truth in it. The Tribune was established in 1989 by Vincent Browne in order to give students the ability hold university authorities to account. Now, over a quarter of a century later, we’re still at it. Though perhaps we’re not as much of an attack dog as we have been in years gone by. What I want

to do with my time as editor is encourage conversation. I want to annoy you, get you talking to your mates about what you read here, maybe even cause a shouting match or two. I want to give yuóu ammunition to justify your nap, encourage you to talk about drug use, open up about sex. I’m immensely proud when I see someone walking down the concourse with a copy of this paper. But what really lets me know that I’m on the right track is when I overhear someone talking about what they’ve read here. So do me a favour, next time you see someone you know, have a chat with them about something you’ve read. Even if it’s just a brief commentary on how crap that Seán guys writing is. (Do yourself a favour and look up that quote, you won’t be disappointed)

Editorial: What are we trying to do here? Seán O’Reilly Editor

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Peter, what the hell was that? This man’s made a big scale cock-up here. You let him get away with it! Now let me speak to him. Put your ear-piece next to his head and stand still.

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Every now and then, I’m asked what my opinion is on

the press. Be it in UCD, national or international; my answer is always the same. “Not sure really”. To give some context to this, I feel it’s important to let you know what I think it is the media should be. I like to tink of the press

Inside the Tribune News - UCDSU launch harm reduction campaign. pg.3 - Science Expressions Film Fest comes to UCD. pg. 4 - Entreprenurial Culture: News in Focus. pg. 5

Features

- You need to Nap. pg. 6 - Student Foodies. pg. 7 - Scott on Sex: Double Standards. pg. 8 - Harm Reduction: Ketamin. pg.8 - From Russia with Love: Putin in Syria. pg. 9

Business - TV3 aren’t so bad. pg. 12 - Budget Two Sixteen, what you need to know. pg. 12 -Have we reached peak Burrito in Dublin? pg. 12

Politics & Innovation

- Smartvote. pg. 13 - Socialist Workers Party & Amnesty International protest outside SU. pg.14 - Budget Analysis. pg. 15

Gaeilge - Sli an Atlantaigh. pg. 16 - An comortas fas é. pg. 16

Sport - Premiership Musigs. pg. 17 - Flights of Fancy. pg. 18 -All Blacks Hammer Boks to progess. pg. 19 -UCD lose 1-0 to Finn Harls despite solid display. pg. 20

Get the latest from CT

The COLLEGE TRIBUNE Team are Editors Una Power Seán O’Reilly LG18 Newman Building, UCD Belfield, Dublin 4. editor@collegetribune.ie

Arts Editor Emma Costello

Features Editor Sinéad Slattery

Politics Editor Jack Power

Business Editor Adam Hetherington

Film & Entertainment Editor Niamh Crosbie

Sports Editor Neil Ryan

Eagarthóir Gaeilge Gearóid Óg Ó Greacháin

Music Editor Kevin O’Reilly

Tech Editor Graham Harkness

Fashion Editor Emer Slattery

News Editor Cian Carton

Turbine Editor Hans Offerman

Contributors Tara Casey Shawna Scott Jennifer Smyth Fiechra Johnston Sinead Keane Amelia Murphy, TWA Shane Whooley Charlotte McLoughlin Lucas Davies

Conor Leaden Niall Walsh Rory McNab Rick Sanchez Cillian Fearon Colleeen Finnerty Barry Monahan Niamh Cavanagh Louise O’Toole Brian O’Connor

Ruairi McCann Aoileann Kennedy Luke Fitzpatrick Cora Bolger Muireann (TLF) Ciara Landy Monty O’Reilly Stan Whooley Joey Power Ally Murty

UCDSU Considers Electronic Voting Cian Carton News Editor

CD Students’ Union (UCDSU) is considering the implementation of electronic voting for future polling days. Marcus O’Halloran, UCDSU President, visited his counterparts in Dublin City University (DCU) to discuss their electronic voting system on Friday, 23rd October. DCU Students’ Union (DCUSU) trialled online voting as part of their most recent Sabbatical elections in March. Students were able to cast their votes through Loop, DCU’s online platform for staff and students. Article 18.3.1 of UCDSU’s new Constitution, which was enacted during the last academic year, states that nothing within the Constitution itself “shall prevent the possibility of online or electronic voting. “The article sets out the way in which online voting could be utilised. UCDSU’s Returning Officers can propose to use electronic voting for an upcoming vote. Then, both UCDSU’s Executive and Council must both approve of their proposal by a two-thirds majority. The Independent Appeals & Disciplinary Board (IADB) can overturn the decision to use electronic voting one week before a polling date if it has a specific concern in relation to the “security, integrity or accuracy” of the online voting system. As O’Halloran’s meeting was only to survey the situation in DCU, there is no confirmation as to whether or not UCDSU will attempt to utilise electronic voting in the future.

UCD Students Encouraged to Consider Teaching Careers in England S

tudents in UCD are being encouraged to consider pursuing a career as a teacher in the UK, after the National College for Teaching and Leadership (NCTL) brought its “Train to Teach” roadshow to Dublin. The Conrad Hotel on Earlsfort Terrace played host to the event, which featured representatives from universities and schools who offer teacher training courses. Over 50 interested individuals attended the show. Teaching in the UK has become an attractive option over the past few years, and there are new financial incentives for those who enrol on a teacher training course for the 2016/2017 academic year. The event highlighted the potential salaries, scholarships and taxfree bursaries available for those who take up the profession. NCTL claimed that 80% per cent of attendees they surveyed said the event made them more likely to go into teaching. Kim Mitchell, a Teaching and Leadership Adviser for NCTL, noted how there was a number of attendees who were considering changing careers to move into teaching. The NCTL is an agency of the UK’s Department of Education which aims to help graduates through the process of qualifying as teachers in the UK. Applications for teacher training programmes starting in 2016 open on Tuesday, 27th October. Further information is available online at getintoteaching.education.

UCD SPARC Returns for Second Year U

CD SPARC (Supporting Partnership and Realising Change), a scheme which encourages staff and students to work together to help make UCD a better working and learning environment, has returned for a second year. Both staff and students are encouraged to submit their ideas for a project, with the closing date for applications set for Friday, 30th October. Applicants are challenged to come up with a creative idea to make the campus a better place for everyone. Each project consists of teams of at least three individuals, featuring a mix of staff and students. UCD Teaching and Learning is available to help find suitable partners for applicants. Those who are successful receive funding to cover the expenses of their project. The SPARC website stated that funding of up to €1,000 is available for successful applicants to cover their project expense. Last year, it funded several projects, including initiatives which brought back bees to the Rosemount orchard in Belfield and created a virtual tour of the Conway Institute. An outreach project for archaeology to promote it among school students also proved to be a success. SPARC is run by UCD Teaching and Learning, in conjunction with UCD Students’ Union (UCDSU). Further information is available at ww.ucd.ie/ sparc, which includes information for students who wish to make an application, but are unsure about their idea.

Christmas Exam Timetable Released T he Semester One exam timetable has been released online. This year, the exams are set to take place take place from Monday, 7th December to Friday, 18th December, including a full day of exams on Saturday, 12th December. As usual, the exams

will be held in Shelbourne Hall at the RDS, on Anglesea Road. The teaching term for Semester One ends on Friday, 27th November. It is then followed by a reading week leading up to the exams, from 30th November to 4th

Volume 29 Issue Four

NEWS IN BRIEF

December, inclusive. The provisional exam results will be released on Wednesday, 27th January. The full timetable can be located at www.ucd.ie/students/ assessment/timetables. It also contains information regarding exam regulations for students.

Clare O’Connor, UCDSU Welfare Office and her TCD and DIT counterparts outside the Mansion House, Dublin with Tony Duffin, Director of the Ana Liffey Drug Project Councillor Criona Ni Dhalaigh, Lord Mayor of Dublin and Aodhán O ‘Ríordáin TD, Minister of State with Responsibility for the National Drugs Strategy. Image: Seán O’Reilly

UCDSU launches harm reduction campaign alongside DIT and Trinity Seán O’Reilly Editor

he Welfare Officers of three students unions took to the podium in the Oak Room of Dublin’s Mansion House on Friday last, to jointly launch the “What’s in the Pill?”harm reduction campaign. The initiative has been established with the assistance of the Ana Liffey Drug Project (ALDP) and is the first if its kind in Ireland. Tony Duffin, director of the ALDP surmised the campaign, explaining that “It’s not possible to tell what’s in a pill by sight, smell or taste. While PMA and PMMA are widely known substances which are commonly found in what is sold as ecstasy, there are many others which are not so well known. It was great to work with the universities on what is a pragmatic and helpful resource. Hopefully, it will help many students to make safer decisions.” O’Connor echoed thesentiments of her counterparts in “acknowledging that recreational drug use does happen around Ireland and we’re trying to put in place a harm reduction strategy in that context. We need to engage people taking drugs

with information like this which could help prevent loss of life.” The campaign launch comes in the wake of a number of overdoses both at home and abroad related to chemicals such as PMMA and PMA which have been found to be mixed into pills. Identical posters are to be distributed across the campuses of the three universities involved. The posters will advise students considering using substances such as MDMA of the best ways in which to minimise the damage to their bodies in doing so. Officially launched by the Lord Mayor of Dublin Councillor Criona Ni Dhalaigh, the event was also attended by Minister of State with Responsibility for the National Drugs Strategy Aodhán O ‘Ríordáin. While the minister admitted that he himself would advocate a “drug free lifestyle”, he added that “Drug use is a health issue, which affects all strata of society and it is important to make sure that people have the information they need to make healthy choices.” The campaign is to be rolled out across the threee participating campuses over the coming weeeks. More information can be found at drugs.ie/whatsinthepill

Tuesday October 27th

NEWS

UCD Science Expression’s Defining Futures Film Festival Set for November Cian Carton News Editor

Still from Expedition to the End of the World courtesy of UCD Science Expressions

efining Futures, a programme from UCD Science Expression, is set to run from the 10th to 15th November across Dublin. It will feature film screenings, performances and panel discussions from a range of individuals with backgrounds in science, research, art, film, and media to discuss what the future may bring for humanity. Alex Boyd, Project Manager for Public Engagement & Outreach for UCD Research, Innovation & Impact, stated that the event is Ireland’s only dedicated science film festival, and described it as “a dynamic public engagement programme invigorating conversation around science, technology, research and innovation through film and new media.” As part of the festival, there will be panel discussions followed by screenings on particular topics for the future. On 10th November in Wood Quay Venue,

UCD‘s Dr Gerard Mills, Head of the UCD School of Geography, will participate in a panel discussion on creating sustainable cities after a screening of The Human Scale. The film Switch will explore where future energy to power society will come from with special guest speaker, BBC broadcaster Prof Iain Stewart who is professor of Geoscience Communication at Plymouth University. On the 11th November in the Irish Film Institute (IFI). The future of love in an age of technology will be explored by a panel on the 13th November in Filmbase. The Lexicon in Dun Laoghaire will play host to director Daniel Dencik’s film, Expedition to the end of the World, which follows the attempts of scientists and artists to sail to Greenland in a three mast schooner, on the 14th November. The Irish premiere of Experimenter, starring Winona Ryder and Peter Sarsgaard, will be held in the IFI on the 15thNovember. The film is a biopic of Stanley Milgram, the scientist who devised the now famous Mil gram experiment, in which he led

members of the public to believe that they were delivering electric shocks to a stranger. Boyd said that the aim of UCD Science Expression is to present events for people “interested in learning more about science, have a soft spot for scientists and relish the innovative thinking of researchers”, and that it is “an accessible way of interacting with new thinking and discoveries using film and performance as the starting point for discussion.” UCD Science Expression is looking for students who would be interested in volunteering at the festival. Boyd said that those who volunteer “get to attend the screenings, meet the speakers and generally join a great series of events.” Those interested in participating can sign up at http://www.ucdscienceexpression.ie/take-part/. The full list of events is currently being finalised, and is available at www.ucdscienceexpression.ie.

NEWS IN FOCUS

Volume 29 Issue Four

Creating a Culture of Entrepreneurship

Cian Carton looks at how universities, the government and schools for entrepreneurs are impacting on the culture of entrepreneurship in Ireland.

ast week, Silicon Repub- mentors and access to investors. lic ran a story about how For UCD staff and students, a UCD and Trinity College Dublin range of supports and programmes (TCD) ranked in the top five in are available at the UCD Innovathe world for a study on entrepre- tion Academy. NovaUCD is probneurs. In certain respects, it can ably the most well-known part of be used to look at the culture of the programme, and is often feaentrepreneurship in Ireland itself. tured in the national media when The study came from Pitchbook, a its spin-out companies receive data and technology provider for funding or make large deals. For equity and venture capital mar- example, Logentries, a technology kets. Their University Report for spin-out, was recently sold to Rap2015/2016 looked at the number id7 for cash and equity worth a toof entrepreneurs and companies tal of approximately $68 million. who received venture-capital (VC) It would be foolish to rely on this funding over the last five years. report as evidence that the uniThe statistics are based on the versities are producing successful number of undergraduate alum- entrepreneurs. Pitchbook works ni of each college who got first in the venture capital market itself, round fundwhich acing from a counts for the VC. Trinity focused nacame out on ture of their top with 114 research. EnUCD ranked 4th entrepreneurs t re pre n e u rand 106 comship is more in the world, with panies, with than VCs, 70 entrepreneurs, $655 million Angle inves62 companieraised from tors and SilVCs. UCD icon Valley. sand $275 milranked 4th While unilion in funding. in the world, versities are with 70 enachieving trepreneurs, success with 62 companies their own and $275 million in funding. programmes, there have been Both UCD and TCD have proappeals for the government to do grammes to help launch startmore to nurture entrepreneurups. Trinity’s success comes ship in Ireland. Several weeks from its “Launchbox” accelerator ago, Deloitte called on the govprogramme, which only began ernment to put together a €1 in 2013. Open to undergradubillion package to promote enates and postgraduates with an trepreneurship. Deloitte’s comearly-stage business, it offers ments are persuasive, for they them the chance to participate consist of some of Ireland’s leadin a three month programme ing tax professionals. The timing which gives the teams funding, of the announcement was just

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before the release of Budget 2016. Lorraine Griffin, head of Tax at Deloitte, explained how Foreign-Direct Investment (FDI) and local businesses are the “twin pillars” of Irish business. She noted that there was a need to ensure that “entrepreneurial risk-taking and innovation are recognised and rewarded.” Ireland has relied heavily on FDI through tax incentives as a way to stimulate its economy, to the detriment of its other pillar, perhaps. As the economy starts to improve, Deloitte has argued that government investment in entrepreneurship would have a multiplier effect on economic growth. An interesting measure was proposed by Deloitte to encourage entrepreneurs to hold onto their companies for longer before selling. Padraig Cronin, vice chairman and tax partner with Deloitte, said that “too many businesses sell out after five years, because they feel it’s not worth staying the course.” Deloitte suggested lowering the rate of Capital Gains Tax (CGT) over time as a way to incentivise owners to hold on longer. The Budget introduced this measure, by reducing the CGT from 33% to 20% when a small business is sold, up to the value of €1 million. However, Cronin was later quoted as saying this did not go far enough. Still, the question remains, how does one promote a culture of entrepreneurship itself? Firstly, is it something that can simply be encouraged, or is it something that people just have a natural inclination for? It seems that more could

certainly be done to promote it these skills. There’s a plethora of amongst young people. At the these over in the States” and he same time, it appears that only a “would’ve jumped at [something small minority are interested it. like that] when finishing up [his] If someone is truly interested in Leaving Certificate.” Guiney’s idea running a business, they will natis something that many entreurally gravitate towards it through preneurs would readily support. their actions (the choice of topJack Delosa has risen to fame in ic for this News in Focus piece Australia for his business educasays something about myself). tion institution, The Entourage. Aiding entrepreneurs can be It helps to train entrepreneurs a difficult task, for they often through educational courses. The have a vision for a business in most impressive aspect of The their head that others cannot Entourage is that its courses have comprehend until it becomes a been nationally recognised and tangible entity. This is especialaccredited. Anyone who comly true in some of the technolpletes their twelve month Diploogy areas. The best method to ma of Business, Specialising in help, perhaps, is to offer them Entrepreneurship course receives practical business advice while a certified Diploma in Business. simultaneThe course itself ously encourfeatures modaging them ules from develto develop NovaUCD is probably the oping a personal their idea, professional most well-known part of and in a “school work plan, to for entrethe programme, and is of- creating a sales preneurs” ten featured in the nation- plan and plantype setting. ning e-maral media when its spin-out keting comIn an interview for companies receive fund- munications. a piece on also prepares ing or make large deals. Itstudents his educafor tional chardeveloping a ity Student suitable work Slingshot, which appeared in the environment in which they will last issue of this paper, Patrick lead their future team, while Guiney made a very insightful covering all of the financial ascomment on his career as an enpects of managing a business. trepreneur. He said that he would If a similarly accredited course like have loved to have seen a “fund in this were to be run in Ireland, it would Ireland or organisation that edsurely prove to be a popular alternaucated you on entrepreneurship tive to college. As schools for entreor training you to start a business preneurs start to spring up around from a young age.” He described the world, aspiring Irish entrepreit as “almost like a recognised neurs may hopefully not have to wait 3rd level institution that develops too long to see one on these shores

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FEATURES You Need To Nap Tara Casey Features Writer

ho doesn’t love wintertime? You let your body hair grow out, you consume as much food as possible to keep yourself nice and toasty in your own body fat, and you get to fall into a deep slumber for a few months. But wait, you’re not a bear - so unfortunately it is not socially acceptable to sleep for that long. The student species must survive through the bitter cold months using Red Bull and Berocca to stay awake and be prepared for the approaching attack of the vicious mid-terms and (dare I say it) Christmas exams. While we may not be able to sleep for as long as bears, there are many benefits to taking, what some might call a ‘mini hibernation’, or, in

layman’s terms, a nap. No one needs to be told that a lack of sleep can seriously affect your mood. We have all experienced the crankiness, the short temper and stress of a day where we just want to crawl back into bed and never get up. There have been a number of studies which have shown that napping for a short period can not only cure these short term problems, but can have extensive physical and mental health benefits. A study of 23000 men and women of varying ages, by the University of Athens Medical School, found that the people who took naps of any duration frequently had a 34% lower risk of dying from heart disease than those who did not. Researchers also found that working men who took regular siestas had a 64% lower risk of dying from a

heart related disease. They concluded that this was due to lower stress levels in the nappers. It has also been found that napping not only reduces stress, but also can greatly improve performance and concentration. A study at NASA on sleepy military pilots and astronauts found that a 40-minute nap improved performance by 34% and alertness 100%. A Japanese study, specifically focused on sleep-deprived students came up with similar results. Students who had been restricted to four hours sleep the previous night and took just a 15 minute nap after lunch showed much higher levels of alertness and logical reasoning in a test of cognitive function than those who did not. With the recognised benefits of napping, some universities

Tuesday October 27th

have come up with unique ways of ensuring their students are getting enough sleep. The University of East Anglia was the first university in the UK to designate an area especially for students to nap. The Nap Nook was opened by their Student’s Union earlier this year, and offers students an opportunity to book 40 minute slots to nap on bean bags, mattresses and couches while being safely supervised by CCTV. Students have responded positively, relaxing in the room which is carefully air conditioned to a comfortable temperature for sleep, with soothing sounds such as whales and chirping birds to drown out campus noise. The popularity of this initiative would not be confined to the British students as I am sure there would be queues (á la the queue for James Joyce during study week) every day to use this facility were one to open in UCD. But how does one nap effectively? Most studies have recommended a nap between 15-40

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minutes. Anything over this can lead to sleep inertia, a period of grogginess following waking up. This can also occur if you sleep too late in the day, so it is recommended that you take your siesta between 1pm and 5 pm. Lying in a flat position in a dark, quiet environment and eating food like milk, almonds or porridge before a nap are good ways to help you get to sleep faster. If you really want to be alert following your nap, a trick often employed by night-shift workers, is to drink coffee before you nap. The coffee takes about 15-20 minutes to metabolise in your body so after a short nap you will awake buzzing to take on that 5000 word assignment. We are well into the second half of the semester now and the summer days of lounging around are long gone. Most students are beginning to feel the stress of college workload (or the stress of passively watching your workload pile up). So go on, catch some zzz’s. You will wake feeling refreshed and ready to tackle the work that is (unfortunately) still there when you wake up.

Cora Bolger, one half of Dublin Based Food Blog Two Little Foodies, shares her tips on top Restaurants to visit on a Budget

he Two Little Foodies is a blog with an Instagram page run by myself and my friend Muireann, two student foodies based in Dublin. Whether you prefer sweet or savoury, undoubtedly we all share the common interest of enjoying food - while we celebrate, while we procrastinate, or as we head home from a night out at 5am. We decided to set up our food blog because, as we’ve already said, we LOVE food. More importantly, we love good food. With our blog we hope to abolish any type of food regret (you can’t deny it, we’ve all spent our hard earned money on an absolutely awful meal), and bring out the foodie in all of you (on a student budget, of course). We hope you enjoy!

NEON

You really can’t get more student friendly than this. From Monday to Thursday from 2-5pm, Neon on Camden Street has a student deal which consists of a main dish, rice/noodles and an ice cream cone. That’s right, after your meal you can head up to the self-service machine and make your own ice cream! You’ll get all this for the

The quality of the food is super, the service is extremely fast and the whole place is really casual, so if you’ve had a rough night, you’ll have nothing to worry about coming here.

Volume 29 Issue Four

FEATURES Two Little Foodies

Veggie Lettuce Wrap “Burritos”

FARMER BROWNS

A hidden gem in Ballsbridge close to the quays, Farmer Browns is the perfect spot for lunch or weekend brunch. The food is delicious, the staff are friendly and the restaurant has a great atmosphere. We tried the burger, the club sandwich and the breakfast salad (which is really just a fry in a salad, minus the grease - so you won’t be left feeling overwhelmed). All very reasonably priced, we ended up paying around 20 euro per person, including coffee and extra fries (which probably weren’t really needed, but we feel fries are always necessary). If you’re looking for somewhere off the beaten track for a great brunch, this is the spot for you!

Above and Left:€5 Student Deal of Main Dish, Rice/ Noodles and Ice Cream at Neon off O’Connell Street stocks doughnuts from Dublin Doughnut Co. With different flavours every week, you’ll always find something you’ll enjoy (and an excuse to go back every weekend!). At 3 euro each, they’re a great treat and definitely worth a try.//

DUBLIN DOUGHNUT CO. This one is for those of you with a sweet tooth. Every Thursday, Friday and Saturday, Deli 147 just

Above: Range of Doughnuts at Dublin Doughnut Co.

Left: brunch burger, the club sandwich and the breakfast salad with sweet potato and normal fries at Farmer Browns

Ciara Landy Features Writer Serves 2 Ingredients -1 cup of buckwheat hearts -Small red onion, diced -Cajun spice -Smoked red paprika -Hot chilli powder -Fresh coriander -Little Gem lettuce -1 medium sweet potato -300g of tomatoes, diced -Coconut oil -Good-quality balsamic vinegar -Salt and pepper, to season Optional extras -Avocado -Cheddar Cheese -Sour cream Method 1. Prepare the buckwheat hearts as per the packet instructions. 2. Slice the sweet potato into thin, finger-length pieces. Coat in coconut oil and 2tsp of Cajun spices, seasoning with salt and pepper. Place

with salt and pepper. Place in a non-stick baking dish and cook in a preheated oven at 205 degrees for approx. 25-30 mins. Half-way through the cooking time, turn over the wedges and re-season. 3. In a small pan, lightly fry the onion over a medium heat, in ½ tsp of coconut oil until translucent. Add the buckwheat hearts and 2-3tsp of Cajun spice, 1 heaped tsp of smoked paprika and hot chilli powder to taste. Continue to cook until the spices are well distributed and the buckwheat hearts have gelled together. 4. In a small bowl, add a handful of chopped coriander and 2tbsp of good-quality balsamic vinegar to the diced tomato. 5. Serve the buckwheat in the leaves of lettuce along with the sweet potato “fries” and tomato. Top with mashed avocado, cheddar cheeseor sour-cream if desired.

FEATURES Scott on Sex: Double Standards Shawna Scott Columnist

s a person who walks around all day, every day with a vagina between my legs, I’m obviously plagued with countless social pressures and double standards that I won’t go into now, because we could be here all day, and I know some of you actually have classes to attend. However as a proud, yet somewhat socially oppressed vagina-haver, there is one particular double standard that I benefit from - sex toy ownership. When we imagine a typical female sex toy owner, what do we see? A fun-loving, sexually adventurous, Samantha Jones type character who’s educated and knows what she wants out of life. Sadly for male sex toy owners the stereotypical image put forth by pop-culture isn’t exactly the same - lonely, creepy, socially awkward, hates women. This double standard is something I’ve been trying to figure out and battle against since I started Sex Siopa 3 years ago. I believe there are several facets to this issue. Because female genitalia is just that extra bit more complex by being both internal as well as external, and roughly 70% of women cannot get off by just penetration alone, a lot more women actually need a sex toy - typically a vibrator - to reach orgasm. Western culture has accepted this fact and has now begun to encourage women to

use whatever tools necessary to get themselves off. Men’s genitalia benefits from hanging on the outside of their body, and thus guys generally know exactly what to do with it when they reach puberty. However because of this, if a man prefers or requires a masturbation style different from “the norm,” the (completely wrong) assumption is that he may be defective. Equally this double standard exists in simply wanting a sex toy for variety, not just through necessity. Again when women wish to purchase a sex toy, society is delighted for us. “You go, girl!” they collectively cheer, as we click “Purchase” on that new vibrator. We’re empowered and subversive goddesses who will smash the patriarchy one orgasm at a time. If a straight lad buys a masturbation toy - he clearly has a dysfunctional and possibly misogynist view of women. There’s also a macho element to this as well, the idea that a sex toy is the last resort for a socially awkward fellow who can’t get laid. Part of the problem is the kind of toys available. While the market is definitely growing and creating more and more better designed toys, for a very long time, the majority of toys available to men were quite frankly rather scary looking and reduced people down to fetishised body parts: pussy, tits, ass, feet. The added stigma of buying such a toy was such that it wasn’t until relatively recently that men’s toy design has evolved.

We can thank the internet for that. As more and more men are able to anonymously share their toy reviews, manufacturers are competing to make better toys that appeal to a wider, global market. The Tenga 3D for example, which took the idea of a masturbation sleeve and made it appeal to the techy and art crowds by using aesthetically pleasing geometric patterns instead of semi-realistic, cartoon body parts. In fact Tenga won a prestigious Red Dot design award for their 3D range, which is nothing to sniff at considering other winners include mainstream companies like Apple and Porsche. It’s ironic that while women are going through an empowered renaissance of sex toy ownership, the misogyny that once held us back from enjoying ourselves and exploring new avenues of our sexuality is now keeping men from doing the same. We need to give ourselves permission to own our sexualities and allow our lovers to own theirs, no matter what gender they are. Pathologising men for doing something that is celebrated in women stems from the same sexism that women have suffered for millennia, and it needs to end. *** Shawna would like us to mention that she is giving a talk, along with former UCD Economics Soc. guest speaker Peter Antonioni, about the economics of sex and the worth of an orgasm at the Kilkenomics Festival in Kilkenny on Saturday, 7th of November. Tickets are available at Kilkenomics.com.

Tuesday October 27th

Only Fools and Horses: Taking Ketamine Safely T he College Tribune is running a series of articles giving information about drugs that students may or may not come across during their tenure at university. While we don’t promote the consumption of illegal drugs, we accept that a number of people will try such substances regardless of the law. In this series we seek to provide advice to those people, with the aim of hopefully reducing the harm they face. This issue we are looking at Ketamine, a dissociative psychedelic which is best known as an animal tranquiliser and sedative often used in equine veterinary medicine. Ketamine has a history of human use as an anaesthetic, first developed in 1962 and marketed as a fast acting general anaesthetic. The substance is listed on the WHO Model List of Essential Medicines under the heading of injectable anaesthetics, though in Ireland it is classed as a schedule 3 substance which means it is considered to be a controlled medicinal product which has a high likelihood of being abused. Most often found as

powder, the effects of Ketamine can vary wildly depending on dosage. At lower doses, it causes stimulating effects not unlike those of cocaine with an increase in energy and a sense of euphoria commonly reported. The dissociative effects of Ketamine can be striking and can be very off putting for first time users. Though dissociation, often termed “ the K hole” is typically associated with higher doses, the effects can occur at any dosage. As doses are measured according to body weight, it can be difficult to gauge an appropriate amount. It is therefore recommended to start low and wait until you feel the effects of the drug before considering taking any more. Doses range from 40-50mg at the low end to not more than 400mg. Onset can take from 20 minutes to an hour with the effects of the high lasting up to three hours. Ketamine is also known to be powerfully addictive. The risk of psychological dependency is particularly high with this substance and should be considered if you are thinking of taking Ketamine.

The College Tribune in no way encourages any student to use any illegal substance. The information presented here is issued with the intention of promoting harm reduction, a concept which is gaining popularity in public health circles. For more info, see drugs.ie/whatsinthepill

From Russia with Love: Putin’s Campaign in Syria

FEATURES

Fiachra Johnston Features Writer

t comes as no surprise to learn that Vladimir Putin has been extremely critical of how America has handled the ongoing crisis in Syria. In a Q&A at the Valdai International Discussion Club in 2014, he stated that ‘the politics of those in power in the U.S. is erroneous. It not only contradicts our national interests, it undermines any trust that we had in the United States’. Since the beginning of the civil war against General Bashar al-Assad’s regime and the surge of aggression from ISIS, the ongoing debate between Russia and the U.S. on how to deal with the situation has been tense, to say the least, with Russia favouring going the opposite route of the western coalition: wiping out resistance to Assad, and to the regime that has killed hundreds in its campaign to reign Syria back into its control. This includes American backed rebel groups, which have already suffered heavy losses and are set to lose even more, now that Russia has begun airstrikes against rebel forces.

Already it seems to have had an effect. Recently Reuters reported that “Russian air strikes in Syria’s Latakia province killed a rebel commander and four other fighters from a group armed by President Bashar al-Assad’s foreign enemies”, along with 15 civilians. Although his stance on Syria and the regime has been clear for years, Putin’s sudden entrance into the Middle-Eastern conflict is not. Why has Russia decided to enter the fray now, after such a long period of merely spectating? Perhaps it has something to do with Russia’s stringent foreign policy, which prompts a swift response from the nation against threats to national security? Until recently, Russia’s relationship with Syria was quite amicable. In 2012, Russia was one of three countries that opposed the UN’s formal condemnation of Assad’s government for alleged attacks on civilians in Homs; perhaps this is related to the fact that exports to Syria from Russia in 2010 were valued at over $1 billion. The power struggle that has emerged in the country may have forced Putin’s hand in protecting what they view as an economic and political ally in order to assure the continuation of this

Volume 29 Issue Four

mutually beneficial relationship. On the other hand, the opposite may just as well be true. Hussein Ibish of the New York Times stated that the incursion by Russia ‘is aimed at securing the larger, western part of the rump Syrian state that is still controlled by Mr. Assad — in particular the air and naval bases near Latakia and Tartus’, and predicted that the end game of securing this territory was partition- putting an end to the conflict by means of a ‘Lebanese-style segregation of Syria into zones controlled by rival militias’. If this was the case, Russia’s strikes are a means of not only putting a stop to the conflict, but also of creating a larger Russian presence within Syria and the surrounding area. After the annexation of Crimea and the skirmishes against Ukrainian forces, it’s not out of the question that all of this is a power play by Putin against the machinations of the coalition forces for influence in the Middle-East. Whatever his reasoning, Russia’s President has received a less-than-warm reception to his campaign. President Obama’s press secretary has described Russia’s action as motivated by ‘weakness’, yet after three weeks

an agreement has been reached between the two nations so as to avoid conflict between nearby aircraft. Pentagon press secretary Peter Cook has stated that it does not ‘constitute U.S. cooperation or support for Russia’s policy or actions in Syria’, but this hands-off tactic is something many people have come to expect from America. Russia’s actions, while at odds with US interests, are more than Washington has ever committed to doing in Syria. The White House has remained noticeably absent in the proceedings with Syria, despite its strong condemnation of the Assad regime. CNN does report that Obama has promised US co-operation, but ‘only if that plan includes removing Syrian President Bashar al-Assad’. If Russia does not agree with this scheme to unseat Assad, Obama warned that ‘Russia’s air campaign would only lead to further bloodshed’. Russia, he said, would become ‘stuck in a quagmire.’ Only time will tell what Putin’s true motivations behind these sudden airstrikes are, and whether or not western nations will choose to work with or against him. Until then all we can do is speculate as to the future of the conflict in Syria.

THE TRIB

Arts & Culture Supplement // Issue 4 // 28.10.15

Wyvern Lingo // Subside B

ray Trio Karen Cowley, Saoirse Duane and Caoimhe Barry sit down with music editor Kevin O’Reilly ahead of their Ireland and UK Tour to talk about where they’ve come from and where they’re going.

So how did it all start, you were obviously friends before and did you all just discover that you were brilliant singers? Yeah kind of, because we met when we were all like you know on the cusp of adolescence, and we were bonding over the fact that we had a really intense love of music and that wasn’t so common amongst the people in our school so we just kind of clung to each other. We were all equally passionate about it and our older siblings played instruments and stuff so we just started playing instruments to copy them. Were your tastes in music similar or did you have to sort of adjust to each other? Saoirse used to me much more of a metal-head, yeah she comes out with some mad stuff sometimes. We definitely bonded over folk and rock from the late 60’s and 70’s, classic rock like Led Zeppelin, I think when I met Caoimhe my brother had just given me their album and I thought it was like the coolest thing ever, like I couldn’t believe she knows who they were. Red Hot Chilli Peppers and stuff, I kind of feel like that’s what normally happens when you’re about eleven and you just get these albums and this is just the beginning. It just felt like very natural for us and we were lucky in that sense, I guess we can thank Bray for all this! Thanks Bray! At what point did you actually realise that things were actually getting big and that things were starting to kick oﬀ? I feel like we’ve been a bit of a hobby band for a long time because we’ve been playing music for as long as we’ve been friends and we’ve had the name of this band for a very long time, but then we all went to college and weren’t really sure about what we wanted to do and when Karen and I did a bit of backing vocals for Andy (Hozier) and we saw that what he was trying to do was actually starting to happen and we were kind of l i ke : “Hey wait a

minute, we can probably try to make this happen too!”, so since then we’ve just gone for it. Well we put a lot of work into our EP that we released last year…The Widow Knows…sorry, was that last year? Yeah, and we spent about a year and a half saving for that, recording very slowly, working very hard and then when we released that we were firing it off to all our new contacts we’d made and then our manager came on board and he was like: ”I really like this, how serious are you guys?”, and I guess once you’re asked that, you have to drop everything, so we did and he got us a publishing deal and we just quit everything and just went full time. I can’t believe we did!

“

Are you looking forward to touring, do you like heading out or do you prefer the other aspects like studio work and writing? Absolutely, it’s the best! Touring means that we’ve done all the work and now we get to play music and that’s the best bit. So we get to show off what we’ve been working on. Like right now we’re trying to get our live show together, I don’t know when the last time you might have seen us was but it’s been changing gradually and getting new bits of technology in, like we recently bought a new sampler so right now I spend my time on the laptop trying to get it all perfect! And you know we’re just rehearsing with new things so that’s just a lot of work.

The oﬃcial launch of Wyvern Lingo’s new track ‘Subside’ is in Whelans on the 28th November, the band will be supporting Hozier for his UK dates early next year before releasing their new EP in February. WL have kindly given us two tickets to give away. Keep an eye on the College Tribune Facebook page for info.

What would you be doing if you hadn’t? I would have finished my degree, I’d be working away, I don’t think any of us regret it if that’s what you mean, we couldn’t be happier, this is way better. I think that maybe when we’re in our sixties we’ll go back and do degrees. Yeah greatest hits world tour! We’ve a lot of plans for our sixties to it’s all going to happen then, but right now it’s grand. To be honest our workload is so much that you can’t even think about doing anything else, the rest of our lives is just going to be; band, band, band!

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Does this mean that your sound is going to change? It’s going to progress! I don’t know if it’s going to change, I feel like we’ve tapped into a sound with ‘Subside’ and this new EP, we’ve got this kind of RnB-ish, kind of Grindy, Alty, Rock sound almost. I don’t think our live shows are going to be a lot fuller, we’re just taking advantage of technology a bit. Like we only have six hands! We’ve tried playing with session musicians but there’s nothing like having just the three of us on stage. I don’t think that there’s going to be anything

drastically different at all, we just want it to be better, we just want it to be as chunky as possible. Where do you draw your inspiration from in song-writing, and do you do it collectively or separately? Well I suppose we all write separately and then bring it to the group, rip it apart and start again, you know what I mean? I suppose we get our inspiration from little bits of everything, like what’s on the radio and new sounds that you might hear and think “that’s good!” Or sometimes you’d be just thinking to yourself about an idea and think, ‘get me a pen!’, because at the end of the day we have to keep spinning all these random plates! And do you ever feel under pressure to write new songs? Sometimes, it’s more of an awareness that we need to keep writing, there’s no pressure coming from anywhere, everyone’s pretty sound. Also they don’t want us to just write hits, they want us to write the best songs we can write. And sometimes that can’t be rushed, I think for us there is no single method that works. And where you sit down and say “Right I’m gonna write a song now”, it just doesn’t work like that. I think our songs are always very emotional, like in a good way, but there’s always a lot of passion behind them. I think that’s another reason why we maybe don’t churn them out because they mean a lot to us, not that we’re precious about them, but I think I’d find it hard to continue writing a song if I wasn’t all that invested in it and that feeling doesn’t happen when you dedicate a day to writing. You might be able to work out short bits of melody and that but most times you’d be just staring at the page going; ”Come on!” It’s hard to know when that’s going to happen or what’s going to make that happen, but we try all the tricks. What’s been your high point so far? I feel like we haven’t got there just yet, I feel like we’re not at the high point yet, but so far it was Electric Picnic. Whelans is going to be pretty good. Days like this Sunday when we were recording our video for ‘Subside’ and I just stopped and thought; “This is my job!” It’s the dream.

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Half Moon Run | Sun Leads Me On | October 23rd

ontreal based indie-rock band Half Moon Run appear to have burst out of nowhere in the past 3 years. Hot on the heels of some of the leaders in the genre such as Of Monsters and Men and Mumford and Sons who they’ve opened for and performing at major festivals such as Glastonbury and SXSW the band is producing some brilliant songs of a refined, low-key sound. As a result, expectations are high for the next album and judging from pre-releases the lads don’t disappoint. ‘Trust’ the first track from the new album is catchy, fresh and expertly produced. Half Moon Run is one of those bands that you find it hard to fault, their level of variety from track to track is impressive and each song holds its own and they can back this up by their string of sold-out international dates including their Album Launch in Whelan’s on the 23rd of October. Stick this album on and you’ll be hooked on this brilliant band for weeks.

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Ellie Goulding

Delirium

November 6th

Photo: DMahony Photography via UCD Ents

he ethereal sound of Bjork is back. In January we were treated to her much anticipated and critically acclaimed album ‘Vulnicura’, and now comes the stunning acoustic accompaniment ‘Vulnicura’ Strings. It is being hailed as a more intimate, pure take on the original, merging Bjork’s angelic vocals with captivating string arrangements, ditching everything else. It is a purer, cleaner sound than before, with Bjork’s voice being the main focal point; however it retains all of the crucial elements that made ‘Vulnicura’ such a success. The string section serves to accentuate the orchestral, celestial nature of her voice especially in tracks like ‘Lionsong’. This being a Bjork album, it has its quirks, most notably her use of the Leonardo De Vinci designed viola organist, built for the small sum of $10,000 by Polish musician Sławomir Zubrzycki. It’s no swan dress, but it’s just enough eccentricity to remind us of the experimental nature of Bjork’s music and her continued success in setting herself apart from all other musicians. She’s a little out there, but that doesn’t distract from her undeniable talent. There is truly no one like Bjork.

n October 12th, Diplo came to The Academy on Abbey Street to play alongside UCD Ents DJS. Those who went saw all the shenanigans, including him trying to get girls to come on stage to twerk. The vibe he brought to the Academy was incomparable. Diplo stirred up the crowd with UCD chants after UCD’s Entertainment Manager, Paul Kilgallon, opened up the night which had everyone bopping from the get go, getting sweat and sexy. But where do we go from here? Diplo is a huge name and and with creators come imitators. His style of trap with heavy drops is now common among many other artists, many of them being ones to watch out for. Let this article be your intro to an insight into these other artists. But first, what is trap? Trap Music is defined by StoneyRoads.com as an “aggressive attitude in sound, incorporating bass, triangle, snappy snares and hi-hats, loud kicks, and booming 808’s from the Southern Crunk scene”. But like most dance music it is constantly changing. One of the first big songs to come from the trap scene was Baauer’s “Harlem Shake”. A big name coming out of San Francisco, USA at the moment is Bassnectar. He became huge back in 2011 with this remix of Ellie Goulding’s “Lights” and in 2013 with his remix of Nina Simone’s “Feeling Good”. But more recently he has made his way into the Trap scene with his own songs like “You & Me” and “Noise”. Diplo released a mixtape on Soundcloud in the last week from his time in Paris before he made it to Ireland. On this mixtape was an artist by the name of NGHTMRE, a DJ and producer who has appeared out of nowhere and is creeping his way into the mainstream trap scene. One of my favourites is his remix of Just a Gent’s “Limelight”. Definitely one to watch in the coming future. If you love heavy drops that never end, this last artist may be the music to your ears that you’ve needed all week. Aero Chord from Athens in Greece is a 23 year old prodigy of the trap scene. I highly recommend you give him a listen if you liked what you heard in the Academy. His song “Surface” has raked up a whopper 16.9 million views on YouTube. Definitely check out his remix of Just a Gent’s “Limelight”. For those of you who took your shirts off on Monday night and twerked like you’ve never done so before, hats off to you. But to the unfortunate others who didn’t get to witness the jaw dropping sounds of Diplo, I hope this gives you a small insight to what is out there.

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o artist is careening down the slippery slope that is pop music faster than Ellie. She is showing no signs of stopping after recently stating in an interview with NME that her aim was to make a ‘big-pop album’. Sneak previews of the single ‘On my mind’ certainly affirm this. Ellie’s unique voice is heavily manipulated and dubbed with effects to give that standard pop sound. The repetition of the lyrics; “got you on my mind” over a synth-background doesn’t do much to excite the ears. In my opinion she is heading the wrong direction with her music-making, I would love to see her return to her earlier style where she explores the extent of her incredible vocal range and where her talented voice takes the forefront such as in her tracks ‘Under the Sheets’ and ‘Guns and Horses’. I must say that I am disappointed that Ellie would sacrifice good lyrics and song-writing for the chance to make a rather generic sounding big pop album, but I’m sure it will be a big hit in the charts.

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Bjork

Vulnicura Strings

November 6th

Aoileann Kennedy // Music Writer

One from the Crate: Bicep

Luke Fitzpatrick // Music Writer ////////////////////////////////////////// ////////////////////////////////////////// //////////// Seán O’Reilly // Editor

Satisfy Remixes | A – Brassica Remix | AA John Talabot Rain Remix

ot a new release by any stretch, the Satisfy Remixes have been knocking around since 2014. This record sees John Talabot (of ƒIN fame) and Brassica (Man is Deaf) put their own spin on 2013’s Satisfy. The original, renowned for its innovative blend of disco into house is heard only sparsely with vocals stripped away and instrumentation peeled back by both guest artists.

Brassica takes the A side, setting down 90 beats per minute and keeping closer to a strictly house feel than the Bicep boys. The sound is harsher than Talabot’s take with an audible influence from Ratatat and their use of synthesised strings. Talabot opts for more of a deep house feel sticking around 125 beats per minute throughout. The sound here is clean and rudimental with very little embellishment and just enough influence from the

original tune to keep the connection there. There’s a little bit of bounce to the track as if winds its way through, though not overly so. This is the third self-relese under the FMB label. Though there’s not a lot of copies floating around Dublin, this record can be found for a fiver plus postage on Discogs.

THE TRIB // Arts & Culture Supplement // Issue 4 // 28.10.15 // Music // 2-3

Albums to watch out for Abbey Street Aftermath

2015 Halloween Special: Scary Movie Marathon, anyone?

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It’s the time of year to celebrate all things spooky, kooky and fantastical. So what better way to pay your respects to all things scary than by hosting a scary movie marathon? The College Tribune’s very own certified film buffs have banded together to suss out the best horror films for you to add to your home horrorfest this Halloween. Whether you’re looking for golden oldies, something artsy, or just a good scare, we’ve got the recommendations you need. Just make sure you won’t have to sleep alone the night you watch them!

Suspiria (D. Argento, 1977) ////////////////////////////////

”

Jennifer Smyth

The Thing (J. Carpenter, 1982) ////////////////////////////////

Fiachra Johnston

Set in an Antarctic research camp, this 1982 classic stars Kurt Russell and Keith David as they try to fight off a mysterious shapeshifting creature that impersonates their fellow scientists. Few directors are able to frighten and chill me to the core the way Carpenter can, and through its superb story, stellar cast, and its horrifyingly good practical effects, The Thing ranks as one of the greatest horror films of its time. It’s also shown to researchers working in Antarctica on the night the last plane back home leaves!

Psycho (A. Hitchcock, 1960) //////////////////////////////////

Niamh Crosbie

Suspiria balances style and substance to make a horror film where the girls are just as creepy as the boys. If you have a fear of looking out of windows at night then this film is absolutely not for you. Suzy, a ballet dancer, comes from America to train at a school in Germany. The school however, isn’t as prestigious as it first seems once maggots start falling from the ceiling. Even if you don’t enjoy horror films the visual style of Suspiria balances out the gore and terror experienced those attending the school and makes even the most violent scenes interesting to watch.

A landmark of horror from one of the greatest directors in Hollywood. No Halloween movie marathon can possibly be complete without Psycho, and if you’ve yet to watch it, make this the year. Marion arrives, with a newspaper full of money stolen from her employer, at a motel owned by the mysterious Norman Bates. Unsuspecting, Marion has no idea that she’s about to take the most famous shower in the history of film. Fun fact: actress Janet Leigh took baths for the rest of her life after realising how vulnerable she appeared in the shower scene.

The Babadook (J. Kent, 2014)

The Orphanage (J.A. Bayona, 2007)

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Niamh Crosbie

Jennifer Smyth

Kent’s directorial debut is creepy, psychological and incredibly pointed. Amelia and her son Sam are plagued by the presence of a terrifying evil which has assumedly entered their home through the pages of a storybook. Many haunted-house films play on the uncertainty of whether the monster is real or a product of the character’s imagination, and The Babadook takes this to an entirely new level. Where it lacks in “jump scares”, it makes up for with it the horrifying manifestation of inner torment – because no matter what, “you can’t get rid of the Babadook”

Creepy children are always a staple of any Halloween movie binge. The Orphanage uses this idea and puts it in a scarecrow mask to create a chilling film about family, murder, and the old creepy house on the haunted hill. In the film, Laura and her family return to the orphanage where she grew up in an attempt to reopen it as a home for disabled children but everything goes wrong when her son Simón goes missing. With the help of a séance, truths are revealed and the story twists itself into a narrative that you won’t see coming. The Orphanage is suspenseful and genuinely scary!

Sinister Derrickson & Cargill, 2012)

The Others (A. Amenabar, 2001)

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Niamh Crosbie

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Sinead Keane

Not for the faint-hearted, unless, of course, you are looking for something that will make you jump out of your seat at every turn. Ellison is a true-crime novelist who has chosen his family’s new house with an ulterior motive. However, as you might expect, everything begins to go downhill when things start going bump in the night and the terrifying “Mr. Boogie” and his young companions begin to make themselves known. Sinister is creepy and unsettling, but not without its jump-scares, so hold onto you popcorn and maybe have a pillow nearby in case you need to hide…

Grace, played by Nicole Kidman, lives with her two children Anna and Nicholas in an old manor house on the remote Isle of White. Grace hires servants that arrive on her doorstep the day after the previous help disappear in the middle of the night. In the aftermath of World War II, not knowing if her husband is alive or dead, a trio appear. The Others uses vintage suspense instead of special effects to ramp up tension. As a result, when one of the children hears something go bump in the night we know that this is a house populated by ghostly beings.

Blair Witch (Myrick & Sanchez, 1999)

The Shining (S. Kubrick, 1980)

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Niamh Crosbie

Fans of found-footage movies will adore this film; the entire film – which is an impressive, independent project – is supposedly the footage recorded by the three protagonists before they disappear mysteriously while making a documentary about the legendary “Blair Witch”. The Blair Witch Project is a stylistic masterpiece, but it also weaves a timelessly frightening tale, and is guaranteed to send shivers down your spine at every turn. If you aren’t a fan of jump-scares and you prefer to be thoroughly creeped out, I cannot recommend this film enough.

Niamh Crosbie

Gather your friends and wait with baited breath for the “Heeeeeeere’s Johnny!” moment…. Yet another directing legend makes an appearance in our marathon, with Stephen King’s iconic work of horror, The Shining. Join Jack and his family as they spend winter in the isolated Overlook Hotel, where a whole host of ghastly apparitions are just waiting to happen. This film is intensely psychological, visually colourful and extremely memorable, and if it gets too scary, remember what Joey (Friends) said: never start watching The Shining unless you’ve got plenty of room in the freezer….

Ruairi McCann // Film Contributor

ame, despite its appeal to some, can be poisonous. This is a main driving point of Amy, the long in the making documentary of the music, life and death of Amy Winehouse. Directed by Asif Kapadia, who previously helmed the supremely engaging Senna, this film showcases the director’s penchant for casting illumination on the lives of talented individuals whose success has been tragically undone by their premature deaths. It is this sense of tragedy in tandem with deep-seated frustration that is key to Amy; tragedy born from her death at such a young age, and frustration with the forces at play that lead to it. The forces largely come in the shape of celebrity culture and that relentless magnifying glass that can go in an instant from adoring to despising a public figure. Amy is certainly at its strongest where it critiques this culture. Though the first act of the film depicting her early life and beginning of her love affair with music

Where will we live? Will we be happy? International Film Review: No End F Will we be healthy? Will technology improve ur lives?

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ilm writer Barry Monahan reviews Polish director Krzysztof Kieslowski’s politically charged No End; the first in a new series of international film reviews.

Widely regarded as a cult classic for three decades, No End was only made available outside of Poland in the mid-nineties. Ulla, a Polish translator living in post-solidarity era Warsaw tries to come to terms with the sudden death of her husband, Antek a lawyer. One of Antek’s clients contacts her shortly after his death regarding her husband’s case. Charged with political insubordination for a work strike and in custody, his mission to sacrifice possible acquittal for moral and political beliefs falls short of ideal. Ulla puts the client in touch with Antek’s mentor, an ageing expert who reluctantly takes the case. With a background in the Communist era justice system he pleads with him to take the easy route. As Ulla tries to make sense of her life and raise a son alone, she becomes involved in the case, all the while haunted by memories of her husband.

Where will we live? Will we be happy? Will we be healthy? Will technology improve our lives?

Deﬁning Futures Science+Film Festival 10th–15th November 2015 Tickets and info: UCDScienceExpression.ie An Roinn Post, Fiontar agus Nuálaíochta Department of Jobs, Enterprise and Innovation Investing in your future This project is funded by the Programme for Research in Third Level Institutions (PRTLI) and co-funded by the European Regional Development Funds (ERDF)

An initiative of UCD Research & Innovation

With superb performances from Grażyna Szapolowska as Ulla and veteran Alexsander Bardini, Kieslowski’s direction lacks poise on occasion in order to covey context. What compensates is his exceptional ability to place a magnifying glass on despair and lost hope. Composer and long-time collaborator of later works, most notably the Three Colours trilogy, Zbigniew Preisner provides a sparse and angular score that demands your ear. As with most of the director’s works, Preisner’s score is referenced here by Ulla’s son as he practices piano. Political stories told from the stance of the political classes of the era may leave a lot to be desired, but the narrative here is gelled together by conflict from top to bottom. This exceptional work manages to sustain itself until its bitter finale. Barry Monahannn // Film Writer

Where will we live? Will we be happy? Will we be healthy? Will technology improve our lives?

THE TRIB // Arts & Culture Supplement // Issue 4 // 28.10.15 // Film // 4-5

Review: Amy

is interesting, it pales in comparison to the last act which includes damning footage of comedians and media figures mocking Winehouse for her substance use cut with upsetting shots of the singer’s decline at their hands. Strikingly, the constant, loud and blindingly disorientating flashing of cameras quickly reduces to numbness. Technically, Amy is admirable in its meticulously researched production and engaging visual style. Enlightening audio interviews are fronted by archive footage ranging from home videos of the singer, to professionally shot live performances. The film is, thankfully, bereft of the tired ‘talking head’ motif. The whole thing feels very polished with nigh on perfect editing which never allows the film to feel stagnant. Like Senna, this film is much more than the title suggests. For those who are fans of Amy Winehouse, you will find something worth watching in this comprehensive and honest biography of her short life. But if, like me, your knowledge and experience of Winehouse’s work was limited; you will find a well-constructed and dramatic critique of the press and their treatment of those suffering from mental illness.

Halloween Emer Slattery // Fashion Editor

most ancient festival, Halloween is one of the most exciting events of the year for modern creative souls. The lines between our world and the afterlife become blurred and the only thing to do is to gear up in costume to frighten off the more evil of the spirits which will be returning to Earth for the night. It’s not all bad news though since s w e e t s , pumpkins and parties will be in abundance and when have we ever passed up

the chance to show off their costume creations but more inspiring is that the fun of the festival is so infectious that even the shy among us will get in on the act too. Whether you’ll be bobbing for apples, fighting

the opportunity to get dressed up? In the pages of the Fashion section this issue, you will find some ideas for Halloween styling. Halloween is a time foreveryone. Outgoing people will jump at

over who gets to keep the ring from the barn brack, desperately searching for some children to bring trick-or-treating, chowing down on colcannon in a cobweb-filled kitchen, staying in and snuggling

your dog who is afraid of the fireworks, having ‘Hocus Pocus & chill’ with bae, heading to a haunted house party, or all of the above, chances are you’ll be wearing a costume. In recent years, there has been a welcome shift in focus for women’s Halloween costumes. Ladies seem to have moved on from their ‘sexy (insert profession here)’ phase and into a much more

sophisticated and skilled arena. Fancy dress has become an art form for the masses, with the make-up artistry and consideration put into outfits having reached staggering levels of intricacy in recent times. This blossoming of creativity undoubtedly adds pressure to the designing of a costume: however, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. The stakes have been

The stakes have been upped, and the increased challenge of coming up with a cool costume only makes the drama of the whole situation more fun. To stay true to the roots of Halloween, keep your costume on the scarier side of the scale. Costume inspiration can come from anywhere though: virtually everything can be transformed into a costume version. Anything is possible

for the night that’s in it. A pressing issue recently though has been the factor of the ‘disrespectful’ costume. Halloween costumes are such a serious business now that there has been increasing backlash

at the cultural appropriation that comes with certain costumes. Anti-‘blackface’ movements are sweeping the internet, and Native American-inspired Pocahontas costumes have come under fire too. Whatever you choose to dress as, keep your look outrageous, but outrageous for the right reasons. There is also the option of collaborating on a group outfit- it can be a really fun group project for the crew to have a themed look. Of course, choosing what to dress up as in the first place is always the hardest part. Ghosts, witches, zombies, jelly beans, plastic - surgery patients, characters from your favourite book or film… the options are endless! The main point of the festivities will be to have fun, so don’t get bogged down in the stresses of trying to come up with an outfit. Instead, embrace the whole situation as a creative endeavour.

1. Alex from ‘A Clockwork Orange’

2. Roy Lichtenstein-Inspired Lady

Dressing up as the main character from Stanley Kubrick’s cult classic ‘A Clockwork Orange’ is a unique, ///////////// simple and eff/////////// ective costume. //// All you need is /// a pair of white /// jeans, a white top, black hat and // some eye// liner. //////

If you have a flair for face paint this is the one for you. Bold primary colours are key. Keep your outfit simple.

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Louise O’Toole // Fashion Writer

5 DIY Last-Minute Halloween Costumes

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4. Bag of Jelly Beans A clear plastic rubbish bag, a bag of the most balloons you can find and a permanent marker and you are ready to go. Et viola, you’ve one of the more out there costumes at the party!

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3. Rosie the Riveter ///// /// // / / /

This look is really fun, especially if you’re looking to be a bit more glam. Tryout a 40s make-up look and after that all you need is a denim shirt, jeans, a bandana, and that signature flex- pose!

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5. A Piece of Paper Ok, so this is a real lastminute job. And in fairness, it’s not exactly ging to inspire anyone. But if you’re willing to let people write all over you all night then this is the one for you. Just wear all white and bring a marker! For the slightly more-effort version, draw lines and ‘punched’ holes like an A4 piece of paper.

Louise O’Toole

THETRIB // Arts&CultureSupplement // Issue4 // 28.10.15 // Fashion // 6-7

Halloween Make-up Ideas: Niamh Cavanagh haunts Instagram for some seasonal make-up inspiration

Dublin Open House: The Place We Call Home Charlotte McLoughlin ///// Arts Contributor

ommuting to Belfield every morning can seem tiresome. If it weren’t for mobile data and free Wi-Fi, there would only be long stretches of boredom while you’re stuck in rush hour traffic. If though, you want to take a break from this connected world, use this time to look out at Dublin’s landscape. Our nation’s history, culture and people are in the fibre of every neo-classical building and modern skyscraper. If you glance out at O’Connell Street, you will pass by the GPO where you can still see the filledin bullet holes of the 1916 rising. Dublin Open House urges you appreciate this city. Last weekend, the Irish Architectural Society, explored the theme of ‘The place we call home’. For many of us Dublin will be not only the place we will study in, but the city we will work in, meet the love of our lives and die in. The yearly event allow visitors to wander around freely through Dublin homes and government buildings. It also includes free walking tours of the city and experts in each of the houses on view. For the newer buildings, the architects are often there to quiz about planning and housing. The Architectural society really wants us to ask the question of ‘Where do we live? How do we live? What do we want to live in?’ An even more important question now given the homelessness crisis and environmental concerns. The event is really good at showing us parts of Dublin we never considered visiting. I take the bus through Dawson Street most days and have barely looked to see Mansion House. As the residence of the Lord Mayor of Dublin, it celebrates its 300th year this year. It is one of the oldest houses in Dublin

and has a unique style that is in contrast to the average Dublin house. It is set back from the street and is English in its style. Historically, it is also the setting for the First Dáil’s meeting, after Sinn Fein TD’s refused to take their seats in the Houses of Parliament, they proclaimed; ‘the Irish People is by right a free people’. On 21st January 1919 the Declaration of Independence was signed and later that day the start of the War of Independence began. IRA members shot dead two members of the British Police Force, acting on their own initiative. To celebrate the anniversary, Irish poet Dermot Bolger has written ‘Night in the House on Dawson Street’. The poem speaks; ‘May we exercise our right to congregate here, to protest or converse/ In the shadow of the mansion on the street that belongs to all of us’. As well as belonging to us, it is a place where visiting dignitaries often stop; Nelson Mandela, Mother Theresa and Prince Charles have all stepped through the Mansion House’s Rooms. It can often seem that architecture and city planning has nothing to do with ordinary people of Dublin. If you look behind St. Stephens Green, there is a social housing project that is a sharp contrast from the normal picture of Council Estates being grimy, full of burn-out cars and with needles in the playground. York Street Housing attempts to change that by offering families an enclosed space and a sense of ownership in their housing estate. Seán Harrington Architects in partnership with the council and low-income families who now live there, designed 66 apartments. Their priority was to foster a sense of community with a lot of communal areas; meeting rooms, play areas, garden and

waste-compost that is enclosed and can only be accessed by those living there. Winning numerous awards and the first of its kind, York Street, based its whole design on ecological principles. It is well insulated, has solar panelled roofs and uses the rainwater collected to irrigate the garden, allotments and wash people’s cars. This is not just environmentally friendly but saves the low-income residents a lot of money as well. However to pay for the work one of the sites was sold, to the Royal College of Surgeons, which could have built more houses. Given the need for inner-city housing, it is a depressing development. Book readers would find interest in Marsh Library; where James Joyce and Bram Stoker penned and researched their main works. Just around the corner from Dublin Castle, our first Public Library containing over 25,000 books from the 16th, 17th and 18th on medicine, law, science, travel, navigation, mathematics, music, surveying and classical literature, and especially theology. The most interesting thing to see, is that many of the books have been doodled in by bored students. In a medicine book, from the 18th Century, someone has crossed out drawings of operational instrument and inserted their own. Another has crudely drawn in the works of Shakespeare. Mansion House and Marsh Library are just two of a number of hidden gems that are open to the public and contain the finest illustrations of Irish History and culture. It is a shame that so often we do not appreciate the very places we call home. I urge you to look out from the bus and see if you can find some part of Dublin to get to know a little better.

Emma Costello // Arts Editor or many writers, it’s a dream to make it in the commercial world. A writer to gain attention for a book before even mentioning a plot is a great triumph, and one that not many ever achieve. One author in particular, though, has mastered this; Stephen King. With his work now having a large cult following, it’s hard to know whether or not King is really a great writer. Do we all nod our heads and agree because society is telling us he is? Or does he actually still possess the talent to shock and scare us? Beginning his writing in 1973, his first novel Carrie was published by Doubleday. It was made into a film that remains popular among all generations,

discouraged with his writing progress of a teenage girl with psychic powers. It was his wife that dug out the manuscript and gave it back to King to start writing again. A few years later, he began writing Second Coming, which was then renamed Salem’s Lot. Novel after novel, his credit grew within the horror and supernatural genre. He even went on to sign a deal with Marvel Comics on a seven-issue limited series spin-off called The Gunslinger Born. As the years went on, he dabbled in not only comic books, but also theatre, film, visual art and even music. So what makes Stephen King constantly relevant? For him to have so much work and achievements completed in his

with a tacky cash grabbing revamp of the thriller film released in 2013. Although, this novel may have never been, and thus his career may not have been where it is today. King was unhappy with the first draft of Carrie, even throwing out the manuscript of it. He became

forty odd year career there must be some catch to him. What makes him different, and thus better, then the other horror writers out there? After publishing over fifty books, all of them international best sellers, there has to be some sort of appeal to

“

He received the nickname The King of Horror for his style of writing, where the reader gripped to the page, scared to turn onto the next. Being a masterful storyteller, he produces worlds like our own; worlds filled with good and evil.

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King that encourages his cult following to keep buying and keep praising him. It’s quite easy to just look at his sales records and say that because his books sell and making film deals, that makes him a talented writer, and so he is relevant. Yet, many argue that because he is commercially triumphant in his book sales, this does not make him a great writer. Some critics choose to assume that King is merely a genre writer, specialising in horror. But really, he is polymorphous. In addition to his horror, sci-fi and fantasy novels, he has also written historical fiction, Westerns, and literary short stories, which he describes as “the way I affirm, at least to myself, the fact that I haven’t sold out”. With all these external genres, the man proves that he’s not a one trick pony. He looks towards many past famous authors, such as Edgar Allan Poe and HP Lovecraft, to draw inspiration from. The most notable would be Old Dude’s Ticker, a retitle of The Tell Tale Heart by Poe. It’s clear to see that he works hard at his art, by drawing inspiration from others as well as experimenting with many other genres. But what about his writing style? This is where the real talent of a writer lies. He received the nickname The King of Horror for his style of writing, where the reader gripped to the page, scared to turn onto the next. Being a masterful storyteller, he produces worlds like our own; worlds filled with right and wrong, good and evil. He tells stories that revolve around family crisis, fears of the unknown, and yearning to belong, all situations and feelings almost everyone can relate to. Yet, King has created worlds that seem so far-fetched, such as in his 1986 novel It, where a supernatural being attacks and preys on children’s fears, primarily appearing as a clown. To place such terrors in what seems like a realistic situation is what draws the readers in. King is a great commercial writer, but not a great writer. Whilst he’ll be remembered for his horror genre, I doubt many will look to his novels for such inspiration, as he did to Lovecraft and Poe. If you are to read his books, you’ll notice the “dumbing down” of words so as to appeal and engage the majority of readers out there. There is no challenge in imagining worlds or situations as Mary Shelley or Bram Stoker gave us. King will, though, continue to produce books and they will continue to be best sellers. In perhaps a few years, students may be staring up at King’s large projected face in Theatre L as they learn of the modern horror genre.

Self Publishing, Another Way TWA // Arts Contributor

ast time I spoke of Agents, Publishers, and Editors. I neglected to talk about self-publishing for a

number of reasons. It takes some explaining to properly explore all the intricate facets of self-publishing. It has both positives and negatives in comparison to traditional publishing methods and I’ll go through them in this piece. Self-publishing often seems like a dirty word in the industry. Writers who self publish have traditionally looked down on in some degree by traditional publishing, and vice-versa. Publishing is a fluid landscape nowadays, the explosion of cheap and available methods of online publishing have made Self-publishing a much more viable option. In terms of e-book percentages, you can get as much as 70% of the asking price from sites like Amazon, as opposed to only 25% through a normal publisher or 8% for paperback copies. Self-Publishing essentially means you split your profits with less people. You don’t have an agent who takes a percentage of your profits, you don’t have an editor telling you want you can’t say, and you get to hold on to the majority of your profits. However, it is expensive. Both in time and money. When you are Self-publishing you take up the dozen roles that your percentages would otherwise be paying for. Some things in the world of Self-publishing haven’t changed. It is a lot of work. The biggest problem is that you have to do everything yourself. Most writers don’t have the years of experience or the connections editors, agents, and publishers will have. So not only are you doing all their jobs, but you’re doing them with a serious impediment. Trying to get full distribution in major retail outlets can be horrifyingly difficult, particularly if you are a first time writer, this is largely just do to a lack of reputation. It makes logical sense on the other hand, one can’t expect a store to take on the monetary risk of a first time author without a positive words from someone they trust, such as a publisher they’ve worked with for years. Marketing is a massive issue with Self-publishing. It is a massive expense. Posters in train stations and shop windows don’t magically appear on their own. They are paid for by the publishing company. They’ve made an investment in your book and are working hard to see a return on it. Those who self-publish take on the risk themselves. Another problem with self-publishing and marketing is that most people are not naturally equipped to market things. The marketing department of a publisher will usually have degrees in marketing and years of industry experience. However, it is still possible to do it yourself. It will be hard, you will have to pour your soul into it, and you will have to be prepared for the fact that it still may not be enough. You will still have to pay for certain things. You should pay for an external editor if you intend to self-publish. It may cost more than you would like but it would be better to have a professional copy editor read over your work than let it go to print with a spelling mistake or grammar error on the first page. You should also pay for a professional cover. It will help sell your book a thousand times better than a blurb. It will be why people pick up the book. You should consult industry prices before hand and so you know how much it will cost. If you want professional quality then pay professional prices.

THE TRIB // Arts & Culture Supplement // Issue 4 // 28.10.15 // Arts // 8-9

Stephen King: Enduring Popularity

AboutUCD 1. Locked at Richview

2. Connected on the Concourse

3. Conversation by the Lake

Volume 29 Issue Four

TECH 11

BUSINESS

TV3 Aren’t So Bad Adam Hetherington Business Editor

he reaction to TV3’s coverage of the Rugby World Cup 2015 has so far almost been unanimously negative. The station, which beat RTE to the rights to show the tournament in Ireland with a €3m bid, has been heavily criticised for its 11-minute long ad breaks at half time and as its subpar post-match analysis. As a commercial broadcaster TV3 are legally entitled to run 12 minutes of adverts per hour in comparison to RTE who are only allowed carry 6 minutes per hour. This is a deliberate mechanism implemented by the BAI (Broadcasting Authority of Ireland) to allow commercialsta tions such as TV3 and Setanta to break the monopoly that RTE has on Ireland as the national public service broadcaster.

Despite criticism, as a commercial station TV3 has fully committed to the Rugby World Cup and the investment that they’ve made. RTE broadcast 11 matches in 2011, while TV3 has broadcast 46 live games since the start of the tournament. Although it’s likely the company won’t make a major profit on the tournament, with advertising prices falling dramatically after Ireland’s exit, they have at least covered their costs. On average 36% more individuals (aged 4+) watched the Irish rugby team beat France 24 – 9 at the Millennium stadium on TV3 than watched the Irish football team’s defeat in Warsaw on RTE2. TV3’s coverage averaged 1.15m viewers for the duration of the game, peaking at 1.43m viewers. In comparison, 845k viewers on average tuned into RTE’s coverage of the Euro 2016 qualifier with Poland, reaching a peak of 1.18m viewers

Budget 2016- What you need to know O

n Tuesday two weeks ago, Minister for Finance Michael Noonan delivered his 2016 budget speech to gasps of relief from all around the country. After almost four years of crippling austerity, Mr Noonan finally proceed to give something back to the people of Ireland - particular the low income earners & students. The Universal Social Charge (USC) cuts will benefit all workers, with the first three USC bands being cut by at least 1% and the threshold income to which USC applies being increased to €13,000. For example, a 22 year old earning €20,000 annually

would see their annual take home pay increase by €341. Furthermore the new €13,000 at which USC applies should mean that more students working part time should remain out if the clutches of USC. One area of potential disappointment in the budget will be the lack relief for employers who bear the cost of employing staff. While the wage level at which the higher level of employers PRSI contributions kick-in was increased from €356.01 to €376.01, the PRSI rates themselves have not changed. However, the introduction of a €550 Earned Income

Credit for sole traders and small business owners may encouraging them to hire more current students and recent graduates. The Capital Acquisition’s class A Threshold has also increased from €225,000 to €280,000. This means that children can receive an extra €55,000 worth of assets from their parents free from Capital Acquisitions Tax, a saving of €18,150. The only change that may have a significant negative affect for students is the increase in the excise duty on tobacco by a further 50c per 20 pack of cigarettes. Excise duty is an indirect

The Burrito Boom and the Rise of the Fast Casual Diner

ith upwards of 20 burrito bars now open in Dublin and with the Mexican inspired dish now spreading across the nation. The change in consumer preference towards quality unprocessed food has shaken up the fast food industry and the dominant players have started to take notice. Fast, casual restaurants offer made-to-order meals that are perceived as healthier than traditional fast food in the €6-12 price range. The concept – which originated in the early 90’s – was

propelled into the mainstream off the back of the economic downturn of 2007, as a more discerning customer base in the 18-35 demographic sought out healthier food options and limited discretionary spending meant that customers gravitated towards the cheaper, limited service format. McDonald’s has, for a long time, occupied a seemingly unassailable position in the fast food market. Today, its growth figures and corporate strategy reflect a company on the defensive, struggling to maintain its position. In 2014,

McDonald’s posted 3 consecutive quarters of comparative sales decline in its largest market, the US. Contrast this with Chipotle – one of America’s leading fast casual chains – who reported a 17 percent increase in comparative sales in the first 9 months of 2014. McDonald’s CEO Don Thompson said the company “must demonstrate to our customers and the entire McDonald’s system that we understand the problems we face and are taking decisive action to fundamentally change the way we approach our business.”

In America, such an approach has resulted in the invention of the Artisan Grilled Chicken Sandwich in an attempt to fend off competition from Five Guys, Shake Shack and Chipotle. Similarly in Ireland, competition from the likes of Boojum and Tolteca has drawn a reaction from McDonald’s. 2015 saw the launch of the seemingly healthier McMór, in collaboration with well-known Irish brands including Charleville and Ballymaloe. While Ireland’s up and coming burrito chains are enjoy-

Tuesday October 27th

at the end of the game. To put that into advertising context; halftime and solus ads for the Ireland vs France game alone generated an estimated €607k in revenue for TV3 – the most of any match so far in the tournament. Ireland vs Argentina generated an estimated €592k for the same time slots. This equates to an average of €780 per halftime or solus minute for Ireland’s last two crucial games. Despite an average decrease by 59k viewers (5%) for Ireland’s disappointing game against Argentina, an average of 1.09m viewers still tuned in to the match, which peaked at 1.27m just before the last Argentinian try. Live access and VOD (Video-On-Demand) to TV3’s coverage of the Rugby World Cup have cost the consumer virtually nothing. A 10 minute rant by George Hook is a price I’m willing to pay to access all of this year’s Rugby World Cup.

Conor Leaden Business Writer tax as people only choose to fall within in its scope by purchasing the product that duty applies to. This makes it a relatively painless tax for the government to increase, but one that disproportionately effects lower income smokers. In summary, budget 2016 did plenty to help students in terms of putting more money back in parttime workers pockets, along with making small changes to hopefully encourage employers to hire more staff. These measures along with reduced level of Capital Acquisitions Tax payable on inheritances from parents make this one of the most popular budgets of recent years. Niall Walsh Business Writer ing a boom in popularity, they will need to prepare themselves for stiff competition within the fast casual industry. In January 2015, US chain Five Guys announced it is to open 10 restaurants in Ireland and will be setting its sights on the demographic that has made the burrito its staple food. Looking towards 2016, the casual dining industry is in for some fierce competition, where the only one certain to win is the consumer.

INNOVATION

SmartVote Claims Elevator Award at Social Entrepreneurs Ireland Ceremony Innovation Editor Jack Power chats to UCD Alumnus Keith Moore about his award-winning SmartVote App

he Social Entrepreneurs Ireland Awards are held to accredit the brightest new ideas in Ireland each year, and the Elevator Award is set up to help these start-ups advance and reach the next level. The Elevator award winners this year included SmartVote, Blossom Ireland, Sugru, Care Leavers’ Network, which provides support to care leavers through mentoring and training, and The Mojo Programme which advocates a cost-effective response to develop men’s mental well-being. SmartVote is a voting assistance application set up to connect young people and politics and was born out of the UCD Innovation Academy. The College Tribune meets up to talk to its founder – Keith Moore. So firstly, what is SmartVote and how did you envision the idea for it? “Basically we started SmartVote because I saw a problem myself in the last local election because there were 28 candidates in my constituency and I didn’t know who to vote for. And I didn’t want to vote for a person just because they had a nice poster, so for the first time in my life I ended up not voting at all. And I thought there has to be a better way to make an informed voting decision. So then last summer I did a postgrad in UCD Innovation Academy, and I used that time to come up with some possible solutions. I did a huge amount of research initially to see

what kind of problems voters were having and what problems candidates were having as well. I spoke to about 500 students in the initial stage to see what problems they were having, why they weren’t voting or engaging in elections. I found that the major problem for the students and the voter is that there was a lack of trust in politics and a dislike of poster and flyers. For the candidate it was hard to reach the constituents, it was time consuming

And we match the user with the candidate that best shares their views. We tested it in UCD, we had about 2000 users and 22% said they weren’t going to vote before using SmartVote, 63% said they discovered new candidates, then 65% said it affected who they voted for. So it was a good first pilot. We got about 4000 users for the [Carlow-Kilkenny] by-election, and 72% discovered new issues, 57% discovered new candidates, 56% said it

“So since then we’ve been shortlisted on the Dot. ie Awards category “Best Use of Technology for Social Good”and we’ve won a Social Entrepreneurs Ireland Elevator Award. Basically we feel there’s a unique opportunity at the moment because of the Water Charges movement and the Marriage Equality referendum for the youth of Ireland to get engaged more. The challenge is that the Marriage Equality referendum

Keith Moore and Gordon Rose receiving their Award - courtesy of Social Entrepreneurs Ireland

and they were getting a lot of abuse on the doorsteps. So I imagined there was an easier way to compare all the candidates in a fast and unbiased way –to help increase voter engagement and turnout, to increase transparency and trust in elections, and to allow candidates to reach their constituents easier. Basically SmartVote is about breaking down the barriers and opening up a new communication channel.” “We ask the candidates to give their opinion on 30 issues; the user gives their opinion on the same issues. And we

affected who they voted for, and 98% said they would use it for a general election. We were outside ... city halls for a week, showing people the app and how to use it. There was a girl about 18 or 19 and it was her first or second time going to vote, and she said ‘I only vote whatever my father votes’, so I said give it a go, and she actually had an opinion on every question and at the end of it she was empowered to make her own choice which was brilliant.” How has the company gone forward and evolved from those initial successes?

clear issue; the General Election is about a range of issues, that’s why SmartVote is really important to engage students in a simple ten-minute quiz. We have a lot of partners for the coming General Election, USI, SpunOut.ie, the Journal.ie, Future Voice Ireland, Trinity College Dublin, Straight Up For Equality, UCD, Women for Election, and Rock the Vote. So we’ll get as much help as we can to reach our target audience, which is 18 to 25 year olds.” What was your experience claiming an Elevator Award, and what will it mean

Volume 29 Issue Four

for SmartVote going forward? “Well from start to finish it was an excellent experience. There were fifty social entrepreneurs and we had to pitch our ideas to different panels. During the bootcamp stage there was such energy in the room, because all these good ideas were [looking at] doing good for Ireland. Then we had an interview stage and after second interview panel we were awarded a final award. There were six Elevator Awards, and every one of them was brilliant – it was great to share the stage with these guys doing fantastic things. They had the philosophy that ‘we’re not going to wait for things to happen, were going to make a change and do what needs to be done’.” “You get 20,000 in cash funding and 10,000 worth of workshops and probono work. So it’ll mean we can bring SmartVote to every constituency in Ireland, and we’ll be able to advertise it a bit as well. We’ve come up with the questions and we’ve sent the questions to the parties. So the parties are going to answer the questions they have party positions on, and any question they don’t have a position on the candidate will answer. We’ve met with the election offices in all the major parties and they’re just working through the question now. There’s a lot of work ahead and we have to reach out to all the candidates, but once we get the parties on board it’ll be in their interest to join it then.” SmartVote, it seems, continues to grow and move from success to success, and in the lead-up to the spring General Election any undecided or inquisitive voters will we able to take their test at www.smartvote.ie.

POLITICS

Tuesday October 27th

UCD Socialist Workers and Amnesty International Societies Protest Against Irish Refugee Policy

Jack Power Politics & Innovation Editor

he UCD Socialist Workers Student T Society and UCD Amnesty Internation-

al came together on Tuesday October 13th outside the Student Centre to host a demonstration protesting Ireland’s disappointing reaction to the refugee crisis. Ireland’s response has been laboured in shouldering our responsibilities to take in a portion of the millions of refugees who have fled from conflict to Europe’s shores. The latest figure pitched has been a commitment to integrate 4,000 new asylum seekers, yet this number pales in comparison to other European states. Germany have lead by example and are taking in 800,000 refugees, proportionate to 1% of their total population, Ireland’s intake however comes to a meager 0.06% of our total population. John Molyneux, a leading member of the Irish Anti-War Movement and a campaigner for refugee rights addressed the crowd of students. “We have the resources to house the Syrian refugees, to house the travelers, to house the homeless. The problem is how those resources are distributed, who controls them, and the fact that the whole system works on the priority of profit and not on human need. We stand in solidarity with the refugees and in solidarity with the homeless. The terrible catastrophe of the civil war in Syria has displaced 7 million people ... this is not a problem that is going to go away. The question of how we respond to refugees is one of the key questions – do we live in a decent society that puts human needs first, or do we live in a vicious barbaric society that turns their backs on people. Solidarity with the refugees – they should be welcome here.” Ellie, a member of the Irish Refugee Council spoke about her own experience as an asylum seeker, and the purgatory she has been subjected to for years in Direct Provision. “I have been living in direct provision for five years; people ask me – what is direct provision?

It is a system of no use, [it] undermines the people, and making them believe they are good for nothing. Direct provision is a place where no families or people should be spending many years. I am a young woman and also a mother, and my goal is to be successful, independent and to have my own freedom. I have lived under supervision like a prisoner who doesn’t know my crime or my sentence. The system is very depressing and stressful, so I decided to become a campaigner for an end to direct provision. I have used my pain to campaign for other people, who cannot campaign for themselves. I will be part of Ireland’s future, and we can make it brighter.” “As I am standing here I am also crying in sympathy with my brothers and sisters, nephews and nieces from Syria who are displaced all over the world, fleeing for their lives. We both are looking for a place of safety and better lives. I choose to stand tall and not let the system suppress me [or] depress me. Lets be the change, and let the change start right now.” The prevailing feeling across the Irish political executive seems content to accept a token number of refugees and ignore the magnitude of the continuing crisis, a position evidently not accepted by numerous UCD students.

Regressive Liberalism and the Censorship of Oﬀense Begins to Reach Irish Universities

Alexander Lee Politics Writer

T his year Trinity College effectively barred Maryam Namazie, an Iranian born

human rights activist from speaking at the University as she was due to give a speech on Apostasy and Islamism. A few months later British Journalist Brendan O’Neill claimed students had heckled him during a debate on the right to be offensive when he criticised banning pop songs on campus. Trinity College seems poised to join the list of universities that have taken it upon themselves to police language and social interaction. In Britain student leaders have been busily working to protect students from an ever-widening array of speech. Robin Thicke’s ‘Blurred Lines’ has been all but chased out of British universities and The Sun has slowly vanished from campuses. Sombreros, pub-crawls, holocaust commemorations, costume parties and a blasphemous pineapple have each drawn the ire of socially conscious students and each was promptly banned. Across the Atlantic the situationis similar. UCLA saw lectures interrupted due to the fact a professor corrected grammar in essays – a move deemed racist. The University of California has banned faculty from using certain phrases such as “there is only one race, the human race”and “I believe the most qualified person should get the job”. In Wesley College Massachusetts a statue of a sleepwalking man was declared to have “become a source of apprehension, fear, and triggering thoughts regarding sexual assault” by a petition of over 1,000 students. More often than not freedom of expression is seen as a hindrance to social harmony.

Speakers with opinions that go against the campus zeitgeist have also found their events protested and picketed against by students online. Notable feminist Germaine Greer, managing director of the IMF Christine Lagarde, and former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice have all been confronted with attempts to disinvite them from sharing their opinion. Hundreds of angry students attempted to interrupt the leader of the Front National Marine Le Pen from speaking at the Oxford Union. The fervour of protests has led to ballooning security costs and a hostile environment for controversial speakers. The driving force behind this regressive liberalism is a quest by a growing number of student bodies to prevent ‘offense’. Student activists have the well-intentioned goal of moulding universities into a safe space, free of sexism, racism, Islamophobia, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia and other forms of discrimination. They argue that certain speakers could denigrate the self-esteem of minority groups, make them feel unsafe and fracture the welcoming atmosphere all universities seek to foster. Indeed there is little doubt that some students will find certain speakers offensive. But what does and does not constitute offensive speech has no clear delineation. Contrasted to the United Kingdom and the United States, the Irish university system has only experienced censorship recently, as the Anglo-American trend begins to percolate to Ireland. As Trinity College appears to shift the scales in favour of a student’s right not to feel uncomfortable, it will be up to us to decide how we at UCD wish to balance this issue. Has campus censorship reached Ireland? Perhaps, but whether it will stay remains to be seen.

POLITICS

Volume 29 Issue Four

Brazilian Supreme Court rules Government and Petrobas Implicit in Twenty Billion Euro Fraud Barry Monahan Politics Writer

ast week Brazil’s Supreme Court ruled unanimously that Dilma Rousseff ’s governing Workers Party manipulated its books in 2014 to hide massive fraudulent activity through the semistate oil giant Petrobras SA to the tune of more than twenty billion euro. It marks Brazil’s biggest ever corruption scandal, and it is the first time in 80 years that such a ruling has been made. The story of the fraud allegations reads like a mafia movie; yachts, Rolex watches, $3,000 bottles of

champagne and prostitution rings all feature. Astonishing sums of money exchanged hands through networks of phantom corporations and slabs of cash were transported around the world through a system of couriers. Petrobras SA officials are accused of colluding with a cartel of contractors to overcharge the oil company construction and service work. The cartel decided who would win any contracts tendered; this scheme included some of Brazil’s largest construction companies. The excess payment was then divided between Petrobras staff, political figures and the cartel. Meanwhile, Petrobras publicly traded as 51% gov-

ernment owned. While this type of government corruption is not unique, the scale of payments involved is certainly noteworthy - one ex-Petrobras employee has allegedly promised to pay back the R$100,000,000 he gained through the fraud racket. Accusations of campaign funding fraud have been included in the charges, and will be politically troubling as Rousseff ’s party will campaign for re-election this year; after an election in Brazil parties must submit their accounts to the authorities. Last week presiding Judge Mendes said that there had also been indications of improper financing since the

tigation begun. To date, Swiss authorities have frozen half a billion euro in cash accounts relating to the campaign. Ex-President of the party, Luiz Inacio Lula Da Silva, is to be heard as a witness and not as part of the investigation, while Chairman Murilo Ferreira, in the role since April, is taking a leave of absence until late November. However Rousseff, who chaired the semistate when the alleged corruption took place, has been cleared of all involvement. Recent arrests have included Chief of staff Jose Dirceu and ex-party treasurer Joao Vaccari. Rousseff ’s left wing administration is showing serious signs of

exhaustion; personal polls put her at 8% and mass anti-corruption demonstrations continuing across Brazil’s major cities. An official statement from Rouseff ’s office last week stated that the Supreme Court’s decision is not legally binding and that an appeal is planned. The party’s supporters have claimed that the court “unduly penalises actions it fears will threaten social support for Brazil’s future.” In a further statement, the office claimed “we fulfilled (as governing party) our mission in a technical and transparent manner in search for a better future for our country.//

Budget Analysis: Students and Third-Level Education Left out of the Giveaway Jack Power Politics and Innovation Editor

he Government budget held no surprises and kept with the trend of their previous four budgets in their time in office. The focus was primarily on tax cuts and credits to middle and higher earners, with reductions in the USC, tax credits for the self-employed and an easing on inheritance tax. The other key talking points were a 50 cent tax hike on cigarettes, an extended roll-out of free GP care to under 12s, and the laudable increase in the minimum wage to €9.15 an hour. The theme of the budget was regressive, opting for less investment and more emphasis on tax concessions. The €27 billion Capital Plan was the investment arc of the budget, and was launched with a commitment to several high profile public projects over the next six years. But those in UCD and students elsewhere looking to find what the budget has in store for them will be left searching. There were no measures introduced to deal with the future funding of third-level

There was no restoration of investment despite the third-level sector taking years of sustained cuts and taking years of sustained cuts and asset stripping during the recession; UCD itself witnessed a 13% cutback in core funding from the state in 2014 alone. There was no change on the issue of student fees, and the established parties seem to view the fee structure as a permanent and welcome alleviation on the state’s fiscal affairs. A policy impetus to deal

with the student accommodation crisis in urban areas failed to materialize in this budget; a supreme lack of forward planning as this crisis is set to escalate substantially in the coming years as third level enrollment rises. . The increase on the minimum wage while welcome was not coupled with any effort to improve workers rights for young people. The problem of the insecure zero-hour contracts many students find themselves in was

not addressed, and the potentially exploitative JobBridge internship scheme was not reformed. Students and the colleges or universities they attend were simply left out of Budget 2016. The traditionally impotent lobby effort from students has seen their priorities marginalized by the established parties, and the pre-budget submissions from the new political projects offer no clear alternative. Renua’s higher education

tion platform favoured a Student Loans scheme in order to make Ireland’s colleges “competitive on an international stage”. Their proposed continual shift of the monetary cost of third-level funding onto students shoulders will be unlikely to cache much youth support for Renua. The Green party press officer outlined to the Tribune their stance on third-level education, that “substantial additional funding will be needed just to keep up with the predicted growth in enrolment”. The Social Democrats’ alternative budget costed a positive 10% increase in third-level funding through state investment, but their main education policy centered on equality in education for under 5s. The government claims the fiscal affairs of the country are stabilized, but the nature of this election budget threatens a return to the old ways of excessive tax cuts and piecemeal dividends to prospective voters. It will be one of the crucial questions the electorate will answer this spring, whether to maintain the current budgetary narrative, or to instead demand a sustainable investment in Ireland’s public services.//

Gaeilge

Dé Máirt 27 D. Fomhar

‘Slí an Atlantaigh Fhiáin’ - Faillí déanta uirthi nó le déanamh fós? C

huala mé trácht ar an Wild Atlantic Way don chéad uair i mbrú óige sa Leacht, Contae an Chláir. Bhí scata Méiriceánach ag stopadh ann, agus greim docht daingean ag bean amháin dóibh ar liosta de radharcanna turasóireachta. Ní rabhadar ann dón ólachán, don cheol, don craic ná don thonnmharcaíocht. Bhíodar ann chun Stop #9 arSlí an Atlantaigh Fhiáin a fheiscint - Aillte an Mhothair. Ba bhealach de radharcanna riachtanacha le feiscint í Slí an Atlantaigh Fhiáin dóibhsean. An lá dár gcionn, chuala mé fé don dhara uair, ó lánúin a bhí ag rothaíocht adheas, le cois an chósta, lena mbeirt páistí óga. Ba bhealach rothaíochta í Slí an Atlantaigh Fhiáin dóibh.

Cad í Slí an Atlantaigh Fhiáin dúinne? Conas ar tharla sé nach raibh eolas ar bith agam fúithi? Ní mise amháin a bhí aineolach fé, ach bhí mearbhall ar dhúchasaigh an Leachta fiú, agus iad ag breathú ar na comharthaí nua lonracha seo - ‘You are now on the Wild Atlantic Way’. Ba an feachtas turasóireachta is nua de chuid an Roinn Turasóireachta é ag an am, ach de réir dealraimh ní raibh i gceist ach ag cur comhainm ar áiteanna a bhí ann cheana - buaicphointí de chósta iarthar na hÉireann. Ach an t-ainm curtha i leataobh, ní raibh ach ceann nó dhó dosna ‘Stop’ uilig seo ar Slí an Atlantaigh Fhiáin feicthe agamsa, in ainneoin go bhfuilim i mo chónaí anseo, agus ag gabhaíl thart cósta na

hÉireann, leis na blianta fada anuas. Seans go bhfuil neamhaird déanta againn ar na radharcanna dochreidte - ó Dhún na nGall go Corcaigh - seo toisc go bhfuil siad ar leac ár ndorais de shíor: Ceann Málainn, Sliabh Liag, Ceann an Mhullaigh Mhóir, Trá na Coime, Aillte an Mhothair, Na Blascaodaí, An Bhoirinn agus an Seancheann chun roinnt dóibh a aithniú. Ní hamháin aillte loma, torann na dtonnta, an aimsir is fearr agus is measa sa tír agus siúlóidí fada rómánsúil atá le fáil sna suíomhana thuasluaite, ach mion-chultúir Éireannach ar sheol na braiche. Tá na háiteanna seo sáite i spóirt uisce (ar nós cadháil, tonnmharcaíocht, snámh nocht is léimt as aillte), raimil óil

(le huimhir níos mó tig tabhairne ná tig cónaithe sna baillte), ceol is damhsa gaelach, ceardaíocht traidisiúnta agus bia mamaí. An t-aon buairt atá agamsa, ná go ndéanfaimid feachtas Slí an Atlantaigh Fhiáin a iniúchadh níos grinne. Is iontach an rud é solas a chaitheamh ar na háilleachtaí suntasacha seo trí fhógraíocht a chur chun tosaigh agus ainm cliste a ghlaoch uirthi, ach a luaith is a thosnóidh an lucht gnó, lóistín, is treoraithe ag cur fúthú ar an gcósta aduaidh go deisceart le sprioc brabús a thuilleamh as, loitfimid na hiontaisí nádúrtha seo atá againn. Glaotar slí fiáin uirthi. Tá súil agam nach dtiocfadh athrú ar an gcur síos sin ar maitheas an bhrábúis sna blianta atá romhainn.

An comórtas fós é?

Gearóid Óg Ó Greacháin Eagarthóir Gaeilge

á Craobhchomórtais Uile Éireann thart don bhliain seo agus mar sin in am féachaint ar aghaidh don bhliain seo chugainn. Bhí tarraingt don chraobhchomórtais cúige againn agus tá an cuma ar an scéal nach bhfuil aon athrú nó stacán i ndán dúinn. Is léir sa pheil go bhfuil Ciarraí agus Corcaigh chun buaileadh le chéile i gCraobh na Mumhan agus buaiteoirí an chluiche sin chun a bheith le Maigh Eo, Áth Cliath mar Sheaimpíní Cúige. Áfach ní féidir Cúige Uladh a thuar agus comórtas oscailte atá ann fós. San iománaíocht is ionann an scéal é, tá Cill Channaigh i Leathcheannais Laighean agus dhá chluiche eile idir iadsan agus Cluiche Ceannais na hÉireann. Áfach le hardchaighdeán le sonrú i gCúige Mumhan is fíor chomórtas oscailte atá ann ach fós Tiobraid Árann chun tosaigh. An raibh aon bhliain ann nuair a bhí Craobhchomórtas níos suimiúla againn? Blain 2013 a bhí i gceist. Bhí gach contae gafa leis an iománaíocht. Cén chontae a bheadh an bua acu? Comórtas oscailte, Cill Channaigh, Tiobraid Árann agus Gaillimh fiú imithe as an gCraobhchomórtas. D’athraigh atmaisféar Contae Luimnigh as craobh na Mumhan a bhua! Chuir foireann Áth Cliath ionadh ar gach leantóir as rud annamh a dhéanamh – Cill Chainnigh a chur sna cluichí cáilithe! Rug na Cláirínigh bua ar Chontae na Gaillimhe! D’éirigh le foireann Chorcaí Cill Cheannaigh a chur amach as an gCraobhchomórtas! Ar deireadh, bród ar mhuintir an Chláir as an gCraobhchomórtas is fearr

riamh a bhua! Meallann an craobhchomórtas seo Sky Sports chun ár gcluichí a craoladh. Tá an cuma ar an scéal go bhfuil ré nua oscailte i ndán don iománaíocht. Faraor, ní mar sin a tharlaíonn sé. Bliain i ndiadh sin is léir gurb é an gnáthscéal atá i gceist. Críochnaíonn an craobhchomórtas le cluiche ceannais idir Chill Chainnigh agus Tiobraid Árann. Buann Cill Chainnigh ach fós tá rudaí iontacha le teacht ó Luimneach agus Loch Gormain de réir deallraimh. Arís ní tharlaíonn sin agus in ionad sin tagann an craobhchomórtas is measa riamh. Faraor, tagann dóchas ar mhuintir na Gaillimhe. An í seo an bhliain go mbeidh Bonn Uile Éireann – atá tuillte – buaite ag Joe Canning? Ach arí buann Cill Chainnigh. Ní féidir locht a chur ar Chill Chainnigh as bua. Is foireann den chéad scoth iad. Ar an drochuair ba léir sa mhí Meán Fómhair nach raibh siad ag cur an fiúntas céanna ar ná mar a bheadh Gaillimh. Níl an ceiliúradh céanna ann a thuilleadh. An é seo an scéal don bhilain seo chugainn? B’fhéidir nárbh é. Is léir go bhfuil foirne maithe ag teacht ó Loch Gorman agus Luimneach i gCraobhchomórtas Faoi 21. Ina theanna sin, tá Gaillimh ag feabhsú mar fhoireann iomlán in ionad foireann le réalt amháin. Is dea-nuacht í do Mhuintir an Chláir go bhfuil Podge Collins ag filleadh go foireann na n-iománaithe. Is mar seo a chríochnaigh Craobhchomórtas 2012 agus tá gach seans ann go mbeidh craobhchomórtas eile ag teacht.

Volume 29 Issue Four

in association with

SPORT

Leicester City v Crystal Palace

Premiership Musings with Neil Ryan and Ally Murty Arsenal v Everton

Sunderland v Newcastle

Liverpool v Southampton

West Ham v Chelsea

Arsenal, in rather atypical style, finished an amazing week for the club by dominating an Everton side in front of their raucous home support. Giroud, returned to the starting line-up after his goal against Bayern Munich midweek, was rampant here in a fantastic display of attacking football. His physicality allowed Arsenal to play a more direct game then they are used to with Mesut Ozil finding him in the box with an absolutely amazing cross for him to flick over Howard’s head. His work rate lead to Arsenal’s second in as many minutes, winning a free kick on the edge of Everton’s box. Carzola’s ball was played towards him in the far post, drawing the attention of the attending defenders and allowing Koscienly to head into the back of the net. The performance of both Giroud and Walcott will give Wenger a sense of hope that they might finally be crowned champions in May.

A first half red card rather ruined the first Tyne-Were derby of the season with Coloccini giving his marching orders after being judged to have obstructed Steven Fletcher in the box. Many will say that the card was harsh but he did take out Fletcher, considering his usual finishing ability he would have been safer allowing him to shoot unimpeded. Sunderland used the man advantage well but Newcastle did play far better than they have in recent weeks and show some signs of becoming a competent team at some point in the future. For Allardyce he continues the fairly ridiculous form of a Sunderland manager beating Newcastle in his second game in charge. It will be interesting to see if he is able to turn things around in the north east, Sunderland are a club with too many diehard fans for their team to continue to play as poorly as they have in recent years.

Liverpool still look like a side struggling for confidence and creativity in Anfield as they looked to give their new manager his first win of the season. Benteke looked like he had given it to Liverpool with an excellent header in the dying minutes of game. The big Belgium is struggling for fitness after coming back from a hamstring injury and it will be interesting to see how he fares under Klopp. Liverpool’s lack of fit strikers is certainly hurting them at the moment and Klopp will know that he cannot expect too much of this team yet. The young Origi looks age and, if not for the previously mentioned injury problems, it would be difficult to see him continue with his starting position.

Slaven Bilic continued his ridiculous form against the traditional powerhouses of English football, his side completely outplaying a fairly deplorable Chelsea who have been in freefall for so long that they may have finally hit terminal velocity. Jose’s petulance knows no bounds as he was sent to the stand at half time for apparently attempting to enter the referees changing room at the interval. His moody expression and constant knack of making things worse for himself is not helping his team at all and, at the moment, it looks unlikely that he will last till the end of the season. For West Ham this season might grant them a real chance of ending the season in a European place before their move to the Olympic stadium. If they can it may herald a new dawn for The Hammers.

Your pension, now at your fingertips

All you need to know about your pension at the heart of your online banking.

In a battle between two of this year’s most surprising teams Leicester City continued their fantastic start of the season, in particular the impressive Jamie Vardy. Vardy, now top scorer in the premiership, can dream of starting for England in this summer’s European championship. He is playing the football of his life, dominating opposition defences throughout the league. His tenacity must be rewarded by Roy Hodgson this summer as, at the moment, he seems a much better fit for England than a struggling Wayne Rooney.

Manchester United v Manchester City Tipped as the “most expensive game in Premier League football”, Manchester City had the chance to return to the top of the table following Arsenal’s hard-fought victory against Everton the previous evening. It was a tale of 2 defences as for the best part, the rival’s generally negated each other. The introduction of Jesse Lingard sparked some life into the game as the youngster and Smalling came close. But it wasn’t to be as the match ended goalless; the first time since 2010.

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086 852 7393 bankofireland.com/yourpension The image is for illustrative purposes only.

Terms and Conditions apply. The information set out is intended to be a guide only and should not be relied on without seeking professional advice. It is important to note that tax relief is not automatically granted. Revenue terms and conditions apply. Advice on Bank of Ireland Life pensions is provided by Bank of Ireland Insurance & Investments Limited. Pensions are provided by Bank of Ireland Life. 365 online is provided by Bank of Ireland. Bank of Ireland Insurance & Investments Limited is a tied agent of New Ireland Assurance Company plc trading as Bank of Ireland Life. Bank of Ireland Insurance & Investments Limited is regulated by the Central Bank of Ireland. New Ireland Assurance Company plc trading as Bank of Ireland Life is regulated by the Central Bank of Ireland. Members of Bank of Ireland Group. Bank of Ireland is a tied agent of Bank of Ireland Life. Bank of Ireland is regulated by the Central Bank of Ireland.

Volume 29 Issue Four

in association with

SPORT

Long Read: A Flight of Fancy Rory McNab Sports Writer

“M

cNab! I’ve got another assignment for you!” We all have someone like this in our lives. A certain demanding so and so who endeavours to make our struggles on this earth just that little bit harder. Mine is my editor Neil and, if you’ll allow me for a moment to get bloody real here, he’s driving me to the end of my tether with his insatiable lust for web content. “I want two thousand words on my desk for next Monday!” I see my plans for a relaxing weekend of topiary and eating raw beef crumble before me. “Oh sure,” I think to myself, “I’ll have two thousand words on your desk for you! How about ‘Wanker!’ carved into your desk two thousand times!? Or ‘Back off you shit!’ scrawled five hundred times, or ‘Go fuck yourself you demanding clitoris!’ etched 333.33-times recurring, into your contemptible mahogany monolith!?” I managed to internalise most of this, the only outward signs of my dissatisfaction; a gentle twitching of my right eye and my remaining in the foetal position for some twenty minutes on the floor of his office. “I want the piece to be a comparison between Arsenal’s team this season and the Invincibles and how not even one of this year’s players would make it onto the Invincibles team.” (The above is a somewhat dramatised account of an exchange which may or may not have actually

“

taken place over Facebook Messenger and may or may not have been quite amicable.) The simple fact of the matter is that his statement is wrong. Thierry Henry has said in interviews that during his whole time at Arsenal there was never a greater sense of team spirit than during the 2003/04 season of the Invincibles. To compare the two teams, t’s patently undeniable that the Invincibles possessed a degree of cohesion and unity which at present seems beyond the current Arsenal crop. Attempting to slot the likes of Coquelin, Ramsey or any player into the Invincibles team would no doubt disrupt that unique dynamic, not least because the players would undoubtedly be deeply unnerved to see a man from the future come and try to usurp one of their own. As such it is somewhat redundant positing which current Arsenal players would best fit into the Invincibles team. My ideal scenario would be to create a sort of hybrid of the players of both teams, splicing their body parts together to create a race of footballing super-beings. Grafting the legs of Hector Bellerin onto Invincible right-back Lauren to grant him extra speed for example, or implanting Santi Cazorla’s brain into Gilberto Silva’s head to enable the latter to read and control the game with the skill of Cazorla. The results would be both unstoppable and aesthetically deplorable. I pitched the idea for creating this herd of short-clad demigods to my editor Neil. He explained to me that, apart from it being a near logistical

My ideal scenario would be to create a sort of hybrid of the players of both teams, splicing their body parts together...

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impossibility, it would constitute a flagrant breach of something he called ‘ethics’. A quick google search of this term, and a tactful intervention by a psychiatrist later, and I began to see the error of my ways. The only way to do this I think is to view a player from each generation for each position in isolation, regardless of their ability to form a cohesive team- so in essence I’m taking Martin O’Neill’s approach to team-selection, hey-oh! For the purposes of this gladiatorial ho-down of a thought experiment I shall put forward two teams which shall vie for positions in a regular 4-4-2 system, which would be more akin to the Invincibles standard formation. Since I think we can all agree that this is at best a fatuous thought experiment I’ve decided that there is only one battleground ‘pon which ‘tis fitting for these colossi to do battle. Only one space which provides a set of trials both unique and challenging enough to truly test this inter-generational maelstrom and separate the men from the now slightly older men in order to assemble a legion of sphere kicking titans; A Church Fete. Yes I shall pit players against each other in a series of church fete style events to determine my ultimate Arsenal amalgam of players old and new. So without further ado:

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Position: Goalkeeper.

Both men do themselves, and the noble art of racing in tiny homemade wooden carts, proud. They zoom around the course- a series of cones set down on a disused bit of tarmac behind the church- overtaking one another, vying for the best line. They finish in a dead heat. A tie. Their quality is inseparable. Though an official later disqualifies Lehmann for not wearing appropriate head safety gear. Winner: Petr Cech.

Position: Left-Back.

Contenders: Ashley Cole vs. Nacho Monreal. Church Fete Event: Face-Painting. The make-up artist, Jeannette the wife of a local butcher, does a stellar job on Ashley Cole. His entire face is utterly transformed into the image of a snarling lion. His whole demeanour seems to morph into that of a wild animal of the Savanah. Lithe. Athletic. Possessing a deadly edge. His fearsome eyes and bared teeth strike fear into all who see him. When Nacho a Monreal arrives Jeanette has accidentally dropped her pack of face pastels into a puddle. She tries to salvage what she can and bravely rubs the soggy sticks against his distraught Spanish countenance. But alas it is in vein. Monreal is forced to borrow some of Jeanette’s make-up wipes and run, in tears, to a bathroom. As he scrubs the last of the sloppy, coloured mess from his cheeks he gazes at himself in the mirror, accepting that he will always look like a somewhat competent drawing of

There is only one battleground ‘pon which ‘tis fitting for these colossi to do battle.

Contenders: Jens Lehmann vs. Petr Cech. Church Fete Event: Go-Kart Derby.

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Peter Crouch. But never anything more. Winner: Ashley Cole.

Position: Central Defence.

Contenders: Sol Campbell & Kolo Touré vs. Laurent Koscielny & Gabriel. Church Fete Event: Three-Legged Race. Sol Campbell & Kolo Touré stand at the starting line, their legs neatly cable-tied together. They have a sense of harmony, of unity. They exude an aura of singe-mindedness. They stare at the finish line, some distance ahead, and visualise themselves crossing it, together. Laurent Koscielny arrives; his brow furrowed, his gaze steely. He is ready to compete, as is Gabriel. Though unfortunately due to Gabriel’s still poor grasp of English, he has fundamentally misunderstood the concept of a three-legged race and has accidentally shackled himself to a bike-rack. Their breakdown in communication means Gabriel is unable to compete and victory is awarded to Sol Campbell and Kolo Touré while a pair of scissors are sourced to free the distressed Brazilian. Winner: Sol Campbell & Kolo Touré.

Position: Right-Back.

Contenders: Lauren vs. Hector Bellerin. Church Fete Event: Guessing the Weight of a Tortoise. Alan, the tortoise, is led out on a lead in front of the two poised sportsmen. They stare at Alan’s plump round shell and his thin flimsy legs, quickly drinking in every minute detail. Calculating. “How heavy is a shell?” “Has Alan defecated recently?” “If so do tortoises defecate much?” “Why am I thinking about Alan defecating?” All these thoughts and more rush through their heads. Lauren could have made the first move. But he chooses not to. He’ll react instead, judging the course of his own decisions from his opponent’s actions. Bellerin, eager to impress, rushes in. “Seven kilogrammes!” Lauren wryly smiles. “Eight kilogrammes.” The judges exchange glances. At last count Alan weighed eight and a half kilogrammes. Lauren punches the air and finds himself the proud new owner both of Alan the tortoise and a place on this hypothetical team. Winner: Lauren.

Position: Central Midfield.

Contenders: Patrick Vieira & Gilberto Silva

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His whole demeanour seems to morph into that of a wild animal of the Savanah. Lithe. Athletic.

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vs. Francis Coquelin & Santi Cazorla. Church Fete Event: Petting Zoo. The boys are all initially having a lovely day out in the petting zoo. Santi Cazorla lovingly cradles a goose whilst Gilberto Silva firmly but affectionately rubs his thick Brazilian hands across the quivering belly of a ewe. Everything is going terrifically until Francis Coquelin suddenly panics and, in a rash moment of madness, slide tackles a piglet. Cazorla and Coquelin are rightfully removed from the petting zoo and Vieira and Gilberto bury the body of the lifeless piglet with as much grace and dignity as the unfortunate situation allows them to muster. Winner: Patrick Vieira & Gilberto Silva.

Position: Right Wing.

Contenders: Fredrik Ljungberg vs. Alexis Sanchez. Church Fete Event: Treasure Hunt. The two men are tasked with collecting as many eggs, hidden around the church grounds, as possible. Alexis Sanchez, to the surprise of no one, finishes in record time. Fredrik Ljungberg is understandably upset and sportingly congratulates Sanchez before posing for a series of photographs for

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All these thoughts and more rush through their heads. Lauren could have made the first move. But he chooses not to.

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a local newspaper. He insists on doing the shoot in his underwear. Sanchez humbly collects his prize- a refurbished leaf-blower- without much ceremony, and pledges to share it with his family back in Chile. Winner: Alexis Sanchez.

Position: Left Wing.

Contenders: Robert Pires vs. Aaron Ramsey. Church Fete Event: Apple-Bobbing. Aaron Ramsey strides confidently up to the water-filled recycling bin perched on a stool. He stares at its surface, brimming with plump red apples. He takes a deep breath and plunges; thwacking his head against the rim of the bin and knocking himself unconscious. He is immediately ruled out of action for three months. The small assembled crowd look on in dismay and lament how it seems only a couple of seasons ago he would have bobbed expertly. Robert Pires approaches and begins to calmly pull out apple after apple until there are none remaining. He then with one hand slicks back his dripping locks and proceeds to have full penetrative sex with the consenting, beautiful stall attendant much

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A work of beauty. He pauses and gazes over at Bergkamp. He sees the Dutchman staring ... tears trickling down his cheeks.

Volume 29 Issue Four

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All Blacks storm past South Africa to set up final with Australia Neil Ryan Sports Editor

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to the horror of those looking on, and the St. John’s Ambulance crew tending to the concussed Ramsey. Winner: Robert Pires.

Position: Playmaker.

Contenders: Dennis Bergkamp vs. Mesut Ozil. Church Fete Event: Paper Plane Making Contest. The two men, greats of their field, take their sheets of paper and retreat to their workshops –small desks borrowed from a local primary school. Ozil folds and slicks, measures and folds and folds and perfects his sheet until he is staring at an almost completed plane. A work of beauty. He pauses and gazes over at Bergkamp. He sees the Dutchman staring at his own sheet with tears trickling down his cheeks. “What is wrong Dennis?” Ozil asks tenderly. “It is the planes. I am afraid of flying. I cannot do it.” Bergkamp replies, shamefully averting his eyes; embarrassed. Ozil makes a decision. He places his nearly finished plane down on his tiny table and approaches the crying Dutchman. “I will help you Dennis.” Ozil assists Bergkamp in making his plane and tries to help him get to grips with his fear of flying. They eventually hold in their hands a magnificent paper plane. Bergkamp’s face is still slick with tears. But he is smiling. They are tears of joy. “Thank you Mesut.” And Bergkamp throws the plane and it flies and flies. And flies. Winner: Dennis Bergkamp.

Position: Centre Forward.

Contenders: Thierry Henry vs. Theo Walcott. Church Fete Event: Snail-Racing. Theo Walcott decides against entering his snail in the race as a sign of his awed respect for his opponent. Thierry Henry eats both snails in celebration. Winner: Thierry Henry. So there you have it. In all, I think we can agree that it would have been far simpler for me to simply have said that Petr Cech and Alexis Sanchez are the only two players who would’ve made the Invincibles team. Blame Neil, my editor, and his coveting of two thousand words.

week after the world eviscerated northern hemisphere rugby this was a match for the English purest. The South African’s used the lineout, the maul and the box kick to great effect to set up kicking opportunities for the excellent Pollard. He took them with ease, putting the South Africans ahead by three inside the first three minutes. The All Blacks response was immediate. They charged up to the South African 22 and calmly went through the phases bringing the ball wide and back centre, probing through the South African’s defence. Suddenly Carter burst into space and played an amazing pass over the top of the South African line to McCaw who swung it to Kaino on the line. Carter scored the conversion: naturally. The South African’s came back throughout the game however, powering forward with their pack. The penalties flowed and Pollard took them greedily. For their part the All Blacks looked to play the ball on the wing with Carter attempting to play intelligent grubber kicks to Milner-Skudder, who was kept very quiet by the amazing Bok’s defence. As the first half entered its dotage the Africans were in control. Their box kicks put the New Zealander’s under great pressure and their breakdown play was superb. A yellow card for Kaino for playing the ball in an offside position followed and Pollard bisected the posts once more as the half ended. South Africa needed to take control of the first ten minutes with their man advantage. They did not. New Zealand stormed into the South African half constantly probing their defence. Though not threatening to score a try they did move the clock down and, a man down, Carter scored an amazing drop goal to bring them back to two points. The South African’s pack had been amazing throughout but, on their own five meter line, they lost the most crucial scrum of the match. The ball popped out, claimed by the All Blacks who went for the jugular with pace, the ball constantly recycled and the angles constantly reversed. Looking for the foul they enticed Habana into slapping the ball out of A. Smith’s hands. Content to drive the knife further in Nanu, finally released, tore towards the left touchline. The South African defence didn’t know whether to tick or twist and his beautiful pass to Barrett set him in for an easy finish. The South African’s stayed within touching distance through their superb penalty taking. Their lack of penetration, made it a difficult task though and, though they remained within touching distance the game seemed to pass them by at the end without much attempt to rest back control.

UCD lose 1-0 to Harps but can take a lot of heart in a spirited second half display Neil Ryan Sports Editor CD will travel to Donegal on Friday night with some measure of confidence after losing the first leg of their promotion playoff game 1-0. Both teams came into the game in good form and with so much at stake a tentative start was expected. The side from Donegal obviously disagreed, flying out of the traps and attacking UCD immediately. A long ball out of their defence found the hard running Tagbo who took the ball on the right hand side of the box and curled in a delicious cross to the unmarked Coll who made a bursting run from left back to powerfully head the ball into the back of the net. A glance at the watch showed that 25 seconds had passed. UCD tried to grab a hold of the game in midfield with Watson and O’Neill showing some decent vision. Conor Cannon manfully ran the channels but found himself isolated on too many occasions with Swan and Doyle falling to provide him with enough support. Harps, playing on the counter, had a great chance to add to their lead. Watson lost the ball inside the opposition’s half to Harkin who stormed towards the Student’s area past two week challenges. O’Donnell was lucky to see the ball sail pass his post. Harkin should have scored. Maxi Kougan had a great

Cut Down: Tim Sherwood Neil Ryan Sports Editor

las, poor Tim! A man of infinite jest, of most excellent Gillets and an ability to try and be the blokiest bloke that ever did manage. In an era of philosophies and statistics Sherwood represent an almost forgotten aspect of English football management; that of the anti-intellectual. One wonders if followers of the premiership from nations replete with technical footballers and young managers with vision looked upon Sherwood as the English games Klopp, following the fortunes of Aston Villa from designer dingy bars and yearning for someone a little bit different. The question was always asked of how Tim would do when required to actually manage a team over preseason and the results seem to be inconclusive. I’m certain that they did probably spend some time training and bedding in

his new arrivals but that certainly doesn’t seem to have transitioned onto the pitch. The loss of Benteke and Delph were certainly damaging but the signings that he has made were his and they simply don’t seem to be good enough. Sherwood’s talents seem far better suited to motivation than to managing and it will be interesting to see where he ends up next. One can imagine premiership chairmen dutifully noting down his number in case they need the greatest “Striker Whisperer’ the game has seen but he might find his next job rather hard to come by. The writing appeared to be on the wall with Villa’s collapse last season. Their performances after securing promotion in the league were simply terrible and their performance in the F.A Cup final was mind boggling to the extreme. For a manager so based on motivation his inability to inspire his squad in what will surely be the biggest game of their ca

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reers was shocking. The point of no return seemed to be reached in the League Cup match against cross city rivals Birmingham where Sherwood, after his team played woefully in the first half, claimed that this was actually a clever strategy by him to lure the opposition into a false sense of security in what might have been one of the most bizarre claims by a manager in the league’s history. The difficulties that Randy Lerner has had in selling the club, coupled with the impossibility of making back a fraction of his investment if it enters the championship forced his hand. Villa now enter the search for a manager to maintain their survival and hopefully greatly improve the quality of their football. Sherwood departs to await the need of a striker with a confidence issue. That or perhaps he will become a travelling motivational speaker.

chance as the ball was crossed in but he failed to test the Harps keeper. Watson and Watts were muscled off the ball too many times in the first half with the northern side dominating them, strangling the College’s forwards as UCD looked to have their first shot on target. If UCD were to get a chance it seemed likely to come from the boot of O’Neill, his delivery from set pieces fantastic. Two at the end of the half caused havoc in the heart of Harp’s box with Leahy unlucky not to get his shot on target. The second half was much better for UCD, Watson and Cannon exerting more control over the game. Another free kick from O’Neill was palmed out by Gallagher. The ball fell to Doyle in the area who, with more time than he perhaps realised, blazed the ball out for a throw in on the far side of the pitch. MacNamee took a long throw in near the right corner flag, a la Rory Delap, and saw the ball farcically bounce over O’Donnell’s head and into the back of his net. He was incredibly lucky that no one touched the ball first ruling out the goal. Later he came for a ball when outside his box as was almost made pay as MacNamee failed to get his volley into the empty net. UCD had a chance to tie the game in the last few minutes with Swan winning it off McNulty. It fell to Watson who ran into the box but Gallagher was well able for it, saving low to his left.