The Suss - Issue 10 - II

VOL: 2 ISSUE: 10 06.04.16

THE COLLEGE VIEW

THE SUSS

ZAYN Will he follow in Robbie’s footsteps?

Interview

BY STEPHEN KEEGAN

“We’re doing it for Ireland” say Rusangano Family I

n the Shona language of Zimbabwe, the word Rusangano means togetherness, and it’s clear that the concept resonates strongly with Rusangano Family’s members - MCs God Knows and MuRli, from Shannon by way of Zimbabwe and Togo respectively, and Ennis producer/turntablist mynameisjOhn. Perhaps it comes out of the trio’s background in youth work - John was previously music project manager with Clare Youth Service, MuRli and God Knows work with Music Generation in Limerick - or the cohesiveness of the west coast scene that brought them together.

Speaking on the phone, John tells me how he met and immediately clicked with God Knows at a radio showcase on west coast hiphop - the Irish kind - and recalls the “shivers down the spine,” Ennis street festival performance that convinced John to start working with him.

He’d been thinking of working with an MC, “not a rapper - someone who could hype up the crowd - straight away I knew, that’s the dude I need to start working with.”

God Knows and mynameisjOhn released their first album together, Rusangano/Family, in 2014 - it featured MuRli on two tracks and was named Best

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Irish Album of 2014 by Nialler9.

In 2015 MuRli came on board full-time and the trio became Rusangano Family.

Since then, “we’ve gotten tighter,” John says.

“Sometimes with hiphop groups, they don’t necessarily see themselves as bands, it’s kind of like well, that guy does the music and that guy does the lyrics.”

It’s not as clear-cut in Rusangano though. “They know their music, they know their production MuRli has a degree in Music Technology, so he can pick out things for me to work on, and God Knows as well,” John says.

The new fully-fledged Family has had a “crazy” year together so far, says John - they recorded their new album Let The Dead Bury The Dead and played their first smattering of shows abroad - first at the Liverpool Irish festival, then at Eurosonic in The Netherlands and then all the way to Austin, Texas for the world’s biggest music showcase, SXSW. Now that they’ve gotten a taste, they want more, John says. “Probably until recently, we’ve kind of just been seeing how things were progressing. Now we’re at the stage where we’re like, let’s give this everything that we’ve got.”

Again he emphasises the

if we get some attention, they’ll probably get some attention after.”

Rusangano Family and the Irish Hip-Hop scene got this attention in a recent Pitchfork feature, From the Outside In - something John was delighted with.

“It’s really good that an Irish writer (like Dean Van Ngueyn, author of the feature) can pitch an article to Pitchfork, who will actually go, you know what, the music featured in this article is of a high enough quality to get printed in what’s essentially the biggest music website in the world.”

John cites the feature as proof that Irish hip-hop has matured into its own thing. togetherness ideal, saying: “We feel like there’s thirty or “Ten years ago, hip-hop was seen as the awkward cousin forty people in Rusangano, at the disco who couldn’t so we’re doing it for all of them as well,” namechecking dance… people here didn’t consider it as a real form of not just close friends like music.”

Galway producer Naive Ted, “We’re just like U2,” John but the whole country too. says. “We’re certainly not as “We’re doing it for successful but the sentiment Ireland… We think we’re is the exact same - we’re a good band, but we trying to make music that also know bands that are represents our homeland.” absolutely incredible - and

“We’re just like U2—We’re certainly not as successful but the sentiment is the exact same - we’re trying to make music that represents our homeland.”

Photo Credit: Front page: www.radio.com; Page 2: www.goldenplec.com Page 3 huffingtonpost.com; Page 4: billboards; Page 5: philstar.com; Page 6: Aoibheann Diver, theodysseyonline.com; Page 7: Emily Crowley, Aoibheann Diver, wallpaperscraft.com; Page 8: veggienextdoor.com, tfosuccess.com.

Is that sentiment found on Let The Dead Bury the Dead?

“Hmmm,” John says.

“I think so. The album is actually quite introspective.

I don’t know if it’s what everyone is going to expect. It’s a very personal record… we basically want to tell you what happened to us over the last year - everything that’s been going on in the background, our feeling towards music, how attitudes towards us have been changing - positively, negatively - relationships with our families, we wanted to cover all of that.”

They didn’t want to make “a load of bangers,” John says. “That’s not where we are as people - I don’t want to say that we’re serious people but when we make music we take it very seriously.”

Rusangano Family release their new album Let The Dead Bury The Dead on Friday, April 8th. They play The Sugar Club on Saturday April 9th.

Review: Mind of Mine by Zayn Malik Z

ayn Malik’s debut album has been highly anticipated since his departure from One Direction just over a year ago. In a boyband, his role was clear: brooding, mysterious, soulful. As a solo artist, he seems less sure of his footing.

In an interview with The Fader magazine last year, he said that he felt constricted by the style of music One Direction were creating, and expressed an urge to move away from ‘generic pop’.

“If I would sing a hook or a verse slightly R&B, or slightly myself, it would always be recorded 50 times until there was a straight version that was pop, generic as fuck, so they could use that version… I wasn’t 100 percent behind the music.

It wasn’t me,” he said.

It’s only fitting then, that fans and critics alike were expecting to hear

a pure R&B album; totally removed from the boppy hooks, danceable beats, and repetitive choruses that characterise modern pop.

However, tracks such as ‘rEaR vIeW’ and ‘fOol fOr YoU’ sound like they could have been picked up from One Direction’s cutting room floor. Although creating music that sounds like your former bandmates’ cast offs is not necessarily a bad thing, it just seems at odds with what he set out to achieve.

When Malik focuses on R&B, it is hazy and soulful; his partnership with Frank Ocean producer Malay is apparent. The track ‘tRuTh’ is particularly Oceanesque, while ‘TiO’ could be mistaken for something by The Weeknd.

While his influences are apparent and he does a good job of creating music in the same vein, it comes off as as more of an ode to

these artists, rather than Malik carving out his own space in the genre.

There are moments of something genuinely special, though. The intermission track ‘fLoWeR’, sung in his father’s native language of Urdu over handpicked guitar, is unlike anything that’s ever been heard in contemporary Western music.

For someone who has been criticised for not being more politically vocal as a Muslim in the spotlight, this song seems like Malik’s way of asserting his identity; a brief, simple but strong retort to the critics.

Another song that stands out is ‘LIKE I WOULD’: an upbeat, buzzy track that is the closest thing to a floorfiller and should be a definite contender for a single.

Interestingly, it is only available on the Deluxe

BY KEAVA O’LOAN

edition of the album, which makes this seem unlikely.

Unsurprisingly, Mind Of Mine has been compared with what’s often considered to be the gold standard of boyband breakout albums: Justin Timberlake’s ‘Justified’ from 2002. Although the two share similarities in tone and genre, Malik’s offering isn’t as strong as Timberlake’s, which still feels relatively fresh today - something it’s hard to imagine Mind of Mine will achieve more than a decade down the line.

It actually draws more parallels with a Justin Bieber album - not his most recent game-changer ‘Purpose’, but the largely unnoticed ‘Journals’ that he released in 2014 - an easy listening pop-R&B record that is generally very good, but also rather unexciting.

It can’t be denied that Malik is talented.

The record is peppered

with strong falsettos, emotional crescendos, and Malik’s signature smokey tones. The only problem is that instead of creating a body of work that has a thread of signature sound running throughout, Mind of Mine simply boasts a tracklist where a lot of the songs just kind of sound the same.

There was potential for Malik to push himself just a little further and deliver more moments that are genuinely fresh and different, but unfortunately he played it a little too safe. As a result, the album delivers less of a punch than expected; establishing itself as perfect mood music to chill to, as opposed to a critically excellent breakout. You get the feeling, however, that Zayn doesn’t really care what anyone else thinks - he made this album for himself.

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Will Zayn go the same direction as Robbie?

BY MICHELLE TOWNSEND

T

here comes a time in each successful boyband’s lifespan where one member throws a spanner in the works and decide to leaves the band, disappointing fans all over the world.

Only last March the world witnessed a multitude of teenage girls mourn the departure of Zayn Malik from One Direction, creating a similar hysteria to that of Robbie Williams leaving Take That in 1995.

Although these two artists come from boyband backgrounds, they are completely different to each other – or so it would seem. Robbie is a natural entertainer with a catalogue of albums showcasing different music genres, everything from soft rock to swing.

Zayn’s style is a little bit edgier and he has made it clear that he wants to focus solely R’n’B. However, if you dig a little deeper and analyse the personalities and successes of Robbie Williams and Zayn Malik respectively, there are many more likenesses than you think. Will history repeat itself? Is Zayn the new Robbie?

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The first notable similarity between Robbie and Zayn is their reason for leaving Take That and One Direction.

Both artists made it no secret that making pop music was not up their street – Robbie said that he would much prefer to make music like indie band Oasis did, and Zayn claimed his freedom of expression as an artist was inhibited by being a member of One Direction.

Robbie’s songs as a solo artist truly set him apart from Take That, due to his undeniable talent as a songwriter and his ability to experiment with different styles of music. Just over a year after quitting One Direction, Zayn has now embarked on an already impressive career as a solo artist with the release of his debut album, Mind of Mine, an R’n’B album with mature lyrics and a far cry from any song ever recorded or released by his old band.

Another thing that people once saw in Robbie and are now seeing in Zayn are the controversial comments each made about their former bandmates and life as a boyband member.

“Both artists made it no secret that making pop music was not up their street Robbie said that he would much prefer to make music like indie band Oasis did, and Zayn claimed his freedom of expression as an artist was being inhibited by being a member of One Direction.”

In the late 1990’s Robbie had absolutely no shame in publicly slamming former Take That manager Nigel Martin-Smith, and who could forget the fierce - and indeed very public - feud he shared with Take That’s frontman Gary Barlow over who was a better artist?

Now, in 2016 history is repeating itself with Zayn.

He has had no issue in reinforcing the idea of how much he dislikes pop music like One Direction’s in his interviews, and although he has admitted that he will frequently speak with former bandmate Liam Payne, he has stated that he is not too bothered with rest of the band’s members, Niall Horan, Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson.

However, the controversial and brazen comments made by both artists has not seem to have impacted on their success at all. Robbie Williams is a multi-award winning household name internationally, having released ten studio albums each consisting of many chart-topping hits.

Will Zayn be able to match the success

of the man who he is coincidentally following the footsteps of? He is certainly off to an extremely good start. Zayn’s debut single Pillow Talk went straight to number one in 60 countries, including America’s Billboard Hot 100, something that One Direction never achieved.

It is still early days to say if Zayn will completely follow Robbie’s footsteps or not. Although they both achieved mega success by the same means and continue to do so, Robbie eventually ended his feud with Gary Barlow and reunited with Take That for an album and tour in 2011.

Is this a ray of hope for eagle-eyed “directioners” who have noticed the similarities between the two singers? Will history repeat itself with the currently biggest boyband in the world? Only time will tell.

For now, fans of One Direction have four albums worth of songs to listen to and reminisce over, as well as new music to look forward to from the controversial, but undeniably talented Zayn Malik.

Finding the formula for a musical comeback

T

he music industry is no stranger to stars trying to make a comeback, however whether they fail or succeed is a separate entity.

“Boyzlife” is the latest “supergroup” made up of members of Westlife and Boyzone to fail at making a comeback.The group is struggling to sell out a small venue in Ireland.

Tickets for their Dublin date in the 300-seat venue of the Conrad Hotel just off Grafton Street have been left on the shelf. Former Westlife member Kian Egan recently spoke out about the project.

“You know, a member of Westlife who left the band after four years decides to use half the name for whatever it is they’re doing,” Egan said on 98fm last week. “From the

perspective of someone who spent fifteen years in Westlife, It was really aggravating and unfair on the fans.”

Although the name seemed to be a clever marketing ploy to boost their promotions, the two bands are not in fact reuniting. Brian McFadden and Keith Duffy are the only members in the group so far. With other members of Westlife such as Nicky Byrne saying they’ll have no part in it, their comeback will inevitably be short-lived.

The original line up of the Sugababes failed to make their return to music successful under the name of Mutya, Keisha, and Siobhan - ‘MKS’. With Siobhan and Mutya both failing to make it as solo artists through the years - and Keisha being the last original member to be kicked out of the band,

they planned to reunite.

Their debut single Flatline fell flat as it failed to enter the Top 50 in the Official Singles Chart back in 2013. The lack of promotion behind the single and the the band’s history of constantly changing lineups ultimately put the final nail in the coffin of their musical career.

The right formula is needed to have a successful comeback, but it’s not always foolproof. One needs the right material to put out, a clever promotional team and of course the perfect timing. Justin Bieber made the comeback of the year in 2015.

Bieber’s Skrillex/Diplo collaboration, “Where Are U Now”, was key to his overall success because it made people want to hear him again.

This was fundamental to Bieber’s success with “What Do You Mean?” The

BY CONOR JACK MARTIN

month-long promotional campaign of celebrity endorsements (from Britney Spears to Comedy Central Roast pal Martha Stewart) also helped. Hs VMAs appearance complete with post-performance tears also helped get the new single headlines.

During Bieber’s hiatus his bad behaviour he was never out of the media for , we may have been sick about hearing his name but we never forgot him. He laughed about his antics and turned his bad publicity into positive media attention for his album “Purpose” regaining more popularity than ever before.

“I named the album Purpose...because, for a while there, I feel like I lost my purpose, and I feel like I found my purpose again,” he said in an interview with Nick Grimshaw.

With singles such as

“Love Yourself” and “Sorry” still dominating the charts six months later, Bieber has secured his title of comeback of the year. This comeback album worked because it felt sincere and authentic and this was the evolution of Justin Bieber. The comeback was heavily publicised, it was the right time for him as an artist and finally his material had weight. Unlike many other singers who have failed to make a successful comeback.

A lot of comebacks in the music industry do not work for one simple reason: people do not care. Artists who have lost their influence either need to shame and shock themselves back into the industry or have something with influence heavily promote their new material.

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Travel

Discover Manchester

M

anchester is located in the north west of England and is less than an hour away by plane. If you’re looking for a cheap weekend break that’s not too far away, Manchester is a great choice.

Manchester is quite an inexpensive place to visit and there are free attractions throughout. There are museums and galleries that are free of charge to explore at your leisure.

The People’s History Museum has fascinating exhibitions on how society in Manchester has evolved over the years. It even includes an old-fashioned interactive co-operative shop and a record shop with a working jukebox.

The city itself is very

BY AOIBHEANN DIVER pleasant to walk around, with beautifully constructed buildings all around. The John Rylands Library and the Manchester Cathedral are two particular architectural beauties.

Of course, you can’t go to Manchester without taking in a football match.

As I was born into a family of Manchester United supporters, there was no question about which team I would see play. My boyfriend, who I went away with, is also a big MUFC fan.

We went to see Man United play Liverpool in the second leg of the Europa League last 16. Sadly, the result did not go in our favour, but the experience was unforgettable nonetheless.

The atmosphere in Old Trafford stadium could only be described as electric. The diehard fans in the Stretford End chanted for the full 90 minutes of the match, even if their spirits had been deflated after Liverpool scored.

My highlight of the trip was the tour of Old

“Manchester is home to the second largest shopping centre in Europe.”

Trafford. From the dressing rooms to the tunnel, you get to experience the whole stadium while being taken through the history of the club.

Manchester is also home to the second largest shopping centre in Europe, so if it’s a shopping getaway you’re after, head to the Trafford Centre.

There are 280 shops and services in the beautiful shopping centre but it is the

food court that makes it so spectacular. It is designed as a huge steam ship that seats 1600 people, and has so many eateries that it is almost impossible to choose just one.

There are plenty of hotels in and around the city and you can definitely find a bargain if you do some research. The city is also easy to navigate once you get used to the tram and bus systems.

College dating deal breakers 5.

2. If they don’t believe in a united Ireland. This is something you should find out on a first date or first encounter. As a citizen of the Republic, it is your duty to avoid these people.

Tiocfaidh ár lá.

3. If they are part of a celebrity 6. fandom. Whether they are a devoted Belieber or Swiftie, it is likely they argue with other people in the comments of a celebrity Instagram. Avoid these 1. If they are doing better from my Sims family and people at all costs. than you academically. This my friends. What are friends is a deal breaker. You don’t 4. For the ladies. If he doesn’t for if not to learn from their own a pair of navy Adidas need the added competitracksuit bottoms with the mistakes? tion outside of your own white on the back. He A friend’s relationship was course. Find yourself a 1. Ifstripe they are doing enough for me to question the is clearly notthan a DCU dummy. This will also help better youstudent, or a real man. Deal This breaker. point of dating at third level. with your self-esteem. academically. is 7.

The friend in question got together with a fellow DCU student, who later dropped out. He moved into her house, rent free and had her fund his social life. This went on for over a year, only to be ended by a Facebook message.

So if you want to avoid a pointless relationship, avoid the following types of people:

C

ollege can be hard.

Relationships can be hard. So you’d wonder why anyone would want to combine the two.

My understanding of relationships comes mainly

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BY ADAM DALY If they kiss their family on the mouth. This is something to look out for. Being overly affectionate with family is creepy. This person is likely to refer to themselves as mammy’s baby. Shut it down.

If they are vegan. You will definitely learn this about them straight away, as they need to mention it every twenty minutes to avoid spontaneous combustion. These people don’t appreciate the delicacy that is a goujon. These people are monsters.

Feature Chloe Boucher makeup masterclass

BY EMILY CROWLEY

D

ublin-based makeup artist and blogger, Chloe Boucher, recently teamed up with OPSH, the online shopping medium, for her latest masterclass.

The event was to celebrate OPSH’s collaboration with Benefit cosmetics on their website.

Boucher demonstrated to the crowd that you can get the perfect makeup look without the cost of high-end makeup brands.

The cosmetic brands used included Bourjois, Catrice and Rimmel, a lot of which the makeup artist admitted to keeping in her professional kit.

Boucher used these drug-store products to create a warm, sultry, brown smoky eye with a natural complexion.

“I learned so many tips and tricks from watching girls on YouTube,” she told the audience. Chloe now has hundreds of thousands of followers on social media.

One tip that she overemphasised on the night was to always put your

BY AOIBHEANN DIVER

There is nothing quite as satisfying as a chocolate cake and this tangy orange twist gives an alternative yet tasty kick.

foundation around and on your ears to give a more connected look to the neck and chest if you’re wearing fake tan.

She also mentioned that for a more full-coverage finish, to first apply a light layer of foundation, leave it set for 20 to 30 seconds, before applying another layer.

She also demonstrated the latest makeup trends such as strobing, contouring and highlighting.

Each guest came away with a goodie-bag full of vouchers and cosmetics.

There was also one winner of a €200 hamper full of Benefit cosmetics given away to the best tweet or Instagram post using the hashtag #OPSHPresentChloeBoucher.

Also speaking on the night was Justine King, a freelance fashion stylist and Creative Officer at OPSH. Both spoke about their rise to success in the past few years and also took a Q&A segment at the end of the show.

“Never, ever did I imagine I would be doing masterclasses for girls,” Boucher admitted.

Ingredients: • 175g margarine • 175g caster sugar • 3 eggs • 175g self-raising flour • 2 tablespoons of cocoa powder • 2 tablespoons of boiling water • Orange flavouring • Butter • Icing sugar Method: 1. Preheat oven to 180˚C. 2. Mix cocoa powder and boiling water together and leave aside to cool.

3. Mix butter and sugar together until creamy.

4. Add the eggs and mix again.

Pick your pout with the right lip products F

inding the right lip products can be a bit of a challenge. There are so many different products on the market that promise to give you the Kylie Jenner pucker, it’s hard to know where to start. Gone are the days when foundation was an appropriate replacement for lippy.

If you are feeling a bit overwhelmed, here are some good quality products that aren’t going to break the bank.

Gloss: Sticky gloss in

our usually windy country means it’s not long before you’re pulling strands of your hair from your once fabulous lips. If this rings home with you, then Nyx Butter Gloss is the answer to your prayers. The buttery consistency promises all the shine without the sticky.

Lip liner: If you are envious of Kylie’s pout but can’t afford fillers, lip liner is essential. Not only can it make your lips look fuller but it also helps to make your lipstick stay put.

Inglot lip liner is especially good for this as it is hardwearing and comes with a handy little brush on the end to help blend and look more natural.

Matte lipsticks: They look gorgeous on celebrities but in reality, matte lipsticks can be really drying on your lips.

A good solution is to use Liquid Lipsticks. They look like gloss and are applied like gloss, but once they dry you’ve got a fabulous matte lip. Nyx Soft Matte

5. Sieve the flour and fold into the mixture.

6. Pour in the cocoa mixture and blend until the mixture is light brown and creamy.

7. Split the mixture between two small cake tins and bake for 20-25 minutes.

8. Allow the cake to cool on a wire rack before decorating.

9. Mix some butter, icing sugar and a few drops of orange flavouring together to make the icing.

10. Spread between the cake halves and on top before decorating with pieces of chocolate.

BY ASHLEIGH NOLAN

Lip Creams are the prime example. They come in lots of different colours and have a lovely creamy consistency to prevent dryness.

Lipsticks: It can be hard to find a good regular lipstick in the aisles of makeup nowadays.

Rimmel has teamed up with Kate Moss to create her Lasting Finish lipsticks. The range includes 18 shades,

varying from powerful reds to pretty nudes. What more could you want?

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Restaurant review: Cornucopia

BY SARAH MAGLIOCCO

Explore the tastes of Dublin with our fortnightly restaurant reviews.

T

he Cornucopia symbolises an abundance and richness of foods and flavours, and Cornucopia restaurant in the heart of Dublin city is no exception to the definition.

Located on Wicklow Street, nestled between two of Dublin’s busiest streets, Grafton Street and South William Street, Cornucopia Wholefood and Vegetarian restaurant is renowned for being one of the few vegan and vegetarian joints in town.

Cornucopia provides diners with fresh and varied vegetarian options, from lentil shepherd’s pie, vegan cheese lasagnes, veggie full Irish breakfast, chocolate chilli casserole and the widest varied of salads you could find anywhere but Chopped.

The menu changes every day with five different mains to choose from and copious

amounts of snacks and sides.

The meals are served canteen style in a casual, warmly decorated downstairs area where you can take the perfect Instagram picture of your alternative meal against the funky patterned wallpaper.

The restaurant is a favourite for lunchtime diners, due to its location and quick serving style.

Grab a handful of cutlery from the display and settle into your meat-free meal under the low hanging ornate mini chandeliers.

Take your meal up the narrow staircase for a quieter, more intimate setting on the airy first floor, where a large bay window overlooks the hustle and bustle of Wicklow Street below.

The restaurant is an ideal spot for a casual lunch or for when you are looking for something that bit healthier.

Cornucopia is also a great place for new and veteran vegetarians to get amazing unique new meal ideas to try out themselves. Vegans also need not fear, there are always vegan options on Cornucopia’s menu, a rarity in the Irish restaurant game.

The restaurant also

recently launched a range of detoxing juices, with flavours such as ginger and beetroot.

Their in-house cold pressed juices are made to order and vary in fruit and flavour.

You can also get your daily (or annual) wheatgrass shot mixed up right in front of you.

Cornucopia isn’t all

Living with a heart condition A

s a baby, I hardly ever cried and slept all the time. Unfortunately, my parents hadn’t hit the baby jackpot, in fact, I was actually quite sick.

On one of my regular hospital visits dealing with my kidney reflux, it was noticed I had abnormal blood pressure in my legs. This was caused by a narrowing in my aorta, the main artery of the body.

To fix this, I underwent heart surgery, known as a coarctation of the aorta, at 18-months-old. Other than a scar that spans the width of my back, my parents were told I was

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fine and would now live a normal live.

It didn’t turn out so simple. Aged 16 I was asked to take part in a study that looked into how blood pressure in patients that had my surgery were affected. Mine was high.

I’ll be honest, some of this is caused by the fact I’ve been overweight my whole life. But a large portion of this was out of my control, and something I will have to deal with for the rest of my life.

Since the study, I take my health a lot more seriously. I think about a lot more than I did before. I

now have a cardiologist who I see every year or two and yearly scans of my heart called electrocardiograms, or ECGs. These scans are unpleasant and a little bit painful, but really not a big deal.

The difficulty lay with accepting that this is a part of me that won’t go away.

A lot of the time, seemingly unconnected things become more difficult because of my condition. Simple things like I wasn’t allowed to donate blood until I had my cardiologists written consent, and having a lot of trouble finding a birth control that was safe for me

to use, as well as mental health issues which some believe stem from the trauma this operation had.

Really though, I’m lucky. I have a normal life

about eating a saintly diet of wheatgrass and lemon water. On the contrary, Cornucopia boasts a balance of sumptuous, cruelty-free desserts such as vegan chocolate fudge cake, gluten free hazelnut brownies as well as their range of organic wines.

BY HANNAH KELLY

expectancy, and more than likely I won’t need further surgery. It’s an interesting part of me that I have learned to embrace and accept.