The Cord May 17, 2017

THE CORD THE TIE THAT BINDS WILFRID LAURIER UNIVERSITY SINCE 1926

VOLUME 58 ISSUE 1 • MAY 17, 2017

WHAT DOGGY-DOO CAN DO

Turning waste into energy through Waterloo pilot project News, page 3

WAGE GAP NARROWS

YOUR NEW PRESIDENT

OUTLAW ROCK

WENDY GOES WILD

GOLDEN HAWKS TAKE ON CFL

Laurier raises salary for 152 women

Kanwar Brar gears up for the fall

Run Coyote takes over The Boathouse

A new approach to social media marketing

Three Laurier athletes make the final cut

News, page 3

News, page 4

Arts & Life, page 8

Opinion, page 10

Sports, page 12 MADELINE MCINNIS/CREATIVE DIRECTOR

2 •

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017

VOCAL CORD

Why are you here for the summer term?

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PHOTO OF THE WEEK

“I slacked in my first terms so I’m trying to catch up and graduate with my friends on time.”

–Raji Rkaur, third-year business administration

“Because I have to ... [I have] co-op term in the winter.”

–Joe Sheridan, thirdyear business administration LUKE SARAZIN/LEAD PHOTOGRAPHER

Golden Hawks Meghan Clarke, Jordyn Witmeyer and Emma Heaps took home bronze from the International Cheerleading Union World Championships.

THIS DAY IN HISTORY: MAY 17

EXCELLENT STUDENT WORK OPPORTUNITY! “Working part-time and taking summer courses.”

–Jordan Head, third-year kinesiology

“Doing add-ons – MLSB.” –Tyler Ackerman, fifthyear business administration

The Survey Research Centre (SRC) at the University of Waterloo is currently interviewing for part-time telephone interviewers to start in the Fall 2017 term. The SRC is a research centre on the UW campus which offers a variety of survey services. Interviewers are responsible for conducting high quality interviews and performing administrative tasks such as data entry. Work does not involve telemarketing or fundraising. Must be in at least 2nd year, be fluent in English, have a clear, strong speaking voice, and excellent communication skills. Experience in telephone work, data entry, or customer service is helpful, but not required; ability to speak French fluently is an asset. Minimum 15 hours/week required, mainly evenings and weekends. Starting wage is $12.50/hour. Send resume to Mariam Mobasher at mmobashe@uwaterloo.

Compiled by Erin Abe Photos by Luke Sarazin NEXT ISSUE

FEATURES EDITOR Karlis Wilde features@thecord.ca

VIDEO EDITOR Vacant editor@thecord.ca

ARTS & LIFE EDITOR Shyenne MacDonald arts@thecord.ca

LEAD REPORTER Nathalie Bouchard news@thecord.ca

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Kurtis Rideout editor@thecord.ca

OPINION EDITOR Emily Waitson opinion@thecord.ca

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Madeline McInnis creative@thecord.ca

SPORTS EDITOR Pranav Desai sports@thecord.ca

LEAD SPORTS REPORTER Abdulhamid Ibrahim sports@thecord.ca

WEB DIRECTOR Garrison Oosterhof online@thecord.ca

GRAPHICS EDITOR Alan Li graphics@thecord.ca

SENIOR NEWS EDITOR Safina Husein news@thecord.ca

PHOTO EDITOR Tanzeel Sayani photos@thecord.ca

NEWS EDITOR Jake Watts news@thecord.ca

PHOTO EDITOR Vacant editor@thecord.ca

NEWS EDITOR Nathalie Bouchard news@thecord.ca

ONLINE EDITOR Vacant editor@thecord.ca

JUNE 14, 2017

CORD STAFF

LEAD PHOTOGRAPHER Luke Sarazin photos@thecord.ca SENIOR COPY EDITOR Michael Oliveri copyeditor@thecord.ca SOCIAL MEDIA COORDINATOR Vacant editor@thecord.ca

CONTRIBUTORS Chris Luciantonio Fani Hseih Matthew Coons Diane Olivia Taylor Dominic Asselin

EDITOR’S CHOICE

ADVERTISING

“From excrement to ener- INQUIRIES gy” by Madeline McInnis All advertising inquiries can be directed to Care Schummer at

“Wendy’s social media care.schummer@wlusp.com or serves up fresh roasts” by 519-884-0710 ext. 3560.

Chris Luciantonio

COLOPHON

The Cord is the official student newspaper of the Wilfrid Laurier University community.

Started in 1926 as the College Cord, The Cord is an editorially independent newspaper published by Wilfrid Laurier University Student Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. WLUSP is governed by its board of directors.

Opinions expressed within The Cord are those of the author and do not necessarily refl ect those of the editorial board, The Cord, WLUSP, WLU or CanWeb Printing Inc. All content appearing in The Cord bears the copyright expressly of their creator(s) and may not be used without written consent.

The Cord is created using Macintosh computers running OS X 10.10 using Adobe Creative Cloud. Canon cameras are used

for principal photography.

The Cord has been a proud member of the Ontario Press Council since 2006. Any unsatisfied complaints can be sent to the council at info@ontpress.com.

The Cord’s circulation for a normal Wednesday issue is 4,500 copies and enjoys a readership of over 10,000. Cord subscription rates are $20.00 per term for addresses within Canada.

The Cord has been a proud member of the Canadian University Press (CUP) since 2004.

PREAMBLE The Cord will keep faith with its readers by presenting news and expressions of opinions comprehensively, accurately and fairly.

The Cord believes in a balanced and impartial presentation of all relevant facts in a news report, and of all substantial opinions in a matter of controversy.

The staff of The Cord shall uphold all commonly held ethical conventions of journalism. When an error of omission or of commission has occurred, that error shall be acknowledged promptly.

When statements are made that are critical of an individual, or an organization, we shall give those affected the opportunity to

1885: Geronimo flees Arizona reservation 1954: Brown v. Board of Education is decided 1963: The first Monterey Folk Festival is held in Monterey, California 1965: The FBI Laboratory weighs in on the “dirty” lyrics of “Louie Louie” 1995: Chuck Berry, Little Richard and Fats Domino appear together for the first time in London 2000: Final episode of Beverly Hills 90210 airs 2004: First legal same-sex marriage performed in Massachusettes

reply at the earliest time possible.

Ethical journalism requires impartiality, and consequently conflicts of interest and the appearance of conflicts of interest will be avoided by all staff.

The only limits of any newspaper are those of the world around it, and so The Cord will attempt to cover its world with a special focus on Wilfrid Laurier University, and the community of Kitchener-Waterloo, and with a special ear to the concerns of the students of Wilfrid Laurier University. Ultimately, The Cord will be bound by neither philosophy nor geography in its mandate.

The Cord has an obligation to foster freedom of the press and freedom of speech. This obligation is best fulfilled when debate and dissent are encouraged, both in the internal workings of the paper, and through The Cord’s contact with the student body.

The Cord will always attempt to do what is right, with fear of neither repercussions, nor retaliation. The purpose of the student press is to act as an agent of social awareness, and so shall conduct the affairs of our newspaper.

Quote of the week: “Honestly, the hot-dogs are the only reason I go to Chainsaw.”

- News Editor and hot-dog connoisseur, Nathalie Bouchard

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017

News

• 3 SENIOR NEWS EDITOR SAFINA HUSEIN news@thecord.ca

NEWS EDITOR NATHALIE BOUCHARD news@thecord.ca

NEWS EDITOR JAKE WATTS news@thecord.ca

INNOVATION

From excrement to energy Waterloo Region wants to turn dog poop into electricity MADELINE MCINNIS CREATIVE DIRECTOR

A new pilot project being introduced by the City of Waterloo aims to turn dog waste into energy, heating and fertilizer.

This would be accomplished through a process known as anaerobic digestion, which happens when organic waste breaks down in an environment without oxygen.

“Here was an opportunity to do something that’s environmentally friendly, show that we’re a dog-friendly city and to do something innovative that a local innovator had come up with,” Dave Jaworsky, mayor of Waterloo, said.

The project begins in less than two weeks and will last for a year.

The dog waste will be collected in underground bins, then be brought outside of the city for treatment.

“Certainly, any students who have a dog should be able to take advantage of this system,” Jaworsky said.

The bins will be placed in three parks around the city: Lakeshore Optimist Park, St. Moritz Park and

Bechtel Park, the city’s off-leash dog park.

The city will observe the effectiveness of this pilot for the next year, monitoring how often the bins need to be emptied at the various parks during different seasons, as the participation in the project may vary depending on factors like weather and location.

Certainly, any students who have a dog should be able to take advantage of this system.

-Dave Jaworsky, mayor of Waterloo

Jaworsky sees the potential for other municipalities to join in on this eco-friendly solution to an age-old problem.

“In our case, this project has a capital cost of only about $10,000.

It could be changing all municipalities across North America in how they handle dog waste,” Jaworsky said.

“120,000 tonnes of waste, times over 200 cities across Canada, this is potentially a very large amount of waste that could be put to good use.”

Currently, Waterloo does not have blue-bins in its various parks due to the risk of cross-contamination with dog waste because there is a possibility that owners may unknowingly throw waste into the wrong bin.

This project also hopes to show the recycling potential of the city if the dog waste is properly disposed of.

If all goes well with the pilot, the mayor hopes that the City of Waterloo can also start to implement blue-bins in the parks in the future.

“By separating this out, we’ll be able to capture those resources of the blue-bin, capture the dog waste in a containment system, generate energy from the dog waste, create fertilizer for our farmers’ fields

FANI HSIEH/CORD ALUM

— it’s just such a win on so many levels” Jaworsky said.

The mayor of Waterloo also sees this initiative as a learning opportunity for students to see the potential we all have to solve everyday problems.

“In Waterloo, we have a lot of startups and entrepreneurs. One

day, someone gave me a call, as it happens quite often, and said that they had a unique offering to solve a problem I didn’t know I had — and that [problem] was dog waste,” Jaworsky said.

“Entrepreneurship can happen anywhere, [even] with the most common of problems.”

EQUITY

WLU administration narrows wage gap SAFINA HUSEIN SENIOR NEWS EDITOR

Wilfrid Laurier University will increase the salaries of 152 female associate and full professors as per the recommendation of an analysis conducted by a joint university-union committee.

The committee, which was established by the Wilfrid Laurier University Faculty Association (WLUFA) and the university administration, was mandated to identify methods of assessment in order to provide a report identifying any female faculty members whose salaries would be anomalous and whether there were gender inequalities between male and female salaries.

The committee began their work in spring 2016 and reported their findings to WLUFA and Laurier administration in Feb. 2017.

“They analyzed salaries using regression models to capture the relationship between the salaries and other characteristics of individuals; such as their year of service at Laurier, their rank, etc.,” Pamela Cant, assistant vice-president of human resources, said.

The committee also recognized through their study that there were numerous differences in starting salaries across academic units and disciplines.

We feel the university must actively support and achieve their goals around enhancing diversity -Pamela Cant, assistant vice-president of human resources

MADELINE MCINNIS/CREATIVE DIRECTOR

For example, starting salaries within the business department may be higher than starting salaries in other faculties.

Through the committee’s recommendation, all female associate professors and full professors will receive a salary adjustment.

In total, 119 associate professors will receive a wage increase of three per cent and 33 full professors will receive a 3.9 per cent increase.

The adjustments will address the gender wage gap that was found.

The wage gap was addressed by the committee using a systematic approach, which was found to be the most effective method.

“You could look on a person-to-person basis to try to find a male comparator for every female faculty then determine if there’s a gap; but that’s very difficult to do because of how salaries are structured,” Cant said.

Other universities, such as University of Waterloo and McMaster, have also used this same approach to address gender wage gaps and increase female salaries.

“Gender equity with respect to wages and terms and conditions of employment is an important principle that Laurier must actively support to achieve its goal of enhancing and sustaining diversity within our community,”

president-designate, Deborah MacLatchy, said.

Cant said that the committee also recommended WLUFA and the university establish a joint working committee to develop programming in order to prevent the reemergence of a gender wage gap.

“We think that’s a really important part of the recommendation because you want to maintain that gender equity and balance. That committee will be struck in order to maintain gender equality within the bargaining unit,” Cant said.

According to Laurier’s strategic academic plan, one of its key pillars emphasizes and focuses on diversity and equity at the univer-

sity.

“Gender equity with respect to wages is a really important principle,” Cant said.

“We feel the university must actively support and achieve their goals around enhancing diversity, and also attracting and retaining high quality talent ... and this is a good step to achieving that.”

As for further steps, Cant explained that Laurier is fortunate to have both a female chancellor and female president-designate.

“I think that’s quite unique and it really sends a very positive message that we do value female leadership at Laurier,” she said.

“I do absolutely think that [MacLatchy] will be a role model for others in the community and externally.”

4 • NEWS

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017

RESEARCH

Data platform works to analyze growth Lazaridis School of Business and Economics is working with Hockeystick to expand companies NATHALIE BOUCHARD NEWS EDITOR

Wilfrid Laurier University’s Lazaridis School of Business and Economics is working with HockeyStick to create a data platform to track the growth metrics of Canadian companies.

The National Data Platform has secured $2.5 million dollars in federal funding to help benefit Canadian businesses.

The data platform will assist with companies’ day-to-day operations.

It will also assist with the Canadian government’s analysis of what makes companies successful and enables them to grow.

We go looking to find the most promising tech companies and invite them to be part of our scale up program.

-Kim Morouney, executive director of Lazaridis School of Business and Economics

Ultimately, this kind of design allows for companies to share information with perspective investment partners.

“We don’t just invest our time and money into something without knowing what works and what doesn’t. This is a competitive advantage for Canada because we are not aware of any other countries that have attempted a nationwide data collection and provision network,” Morouney said.

The Canadian government also plans to analyze the data that companies input into the platform.

The information given will provide insight into ways to fund

and educate incubators on how to improve startups and scale-ups.

“The companies own their data but for the purpose of analysis we’re able to anonymize the data so that we don’t know which exact company that this data belongs to,” Morouney said.

“Then we can analyze what’s working and what’s not.”

The data platform will also provide future opportunities, such as a scale-up program. Within the program, the Lazaridis School of Business and Economics will seek out thriving technology companies.

“We go looking to find the most promising tech companies and invite them to be part of our scale up program,” Morouney said.

“Using this data platform in order to host the applications our companies will apply directly through the platform.”

“I want to do that through public forums, whether that is going to the concourse, RCW lobby, or any-

where else on both campuses and reaching out with the staff, because I think that is really important.”

CONTRIBUTED IMAGE

... we can analyze what’s working and what’s not.

-Kim Morouney, executive director of Lazaridis School of Business and Economics

Kim Morouney, executive director of the Lazaridis school of Business and Economics, explained that the data platform will be influential to the success of growth and expansion into global

markets.

The funding will be allocated to a nationwide goal of company prosperity.

“We can begin to pull together all of the relevant information from startup to scale-up organizations that have grown and are ready to move on to the next growth stage [of their company],” Morouney said.

Incubators and accelerators have provided company support throughout various stages of their growth.

However, Morouney explained that it is difficult to know what works best and which routines are

the most effective in supporting companies.

“If the Canadian economy is to prosper as we go into an increased digital reality then our technology companies really need to be able to grow to a global size, and no one knows what makes a globally successful company,” Morouney said.

When it comes to the design of the platform, companies can enter the nuts and bolts of the business while updating additional information periodically as time goes on.

This allows for company data to be kept private, while ensuring information is stored somewhere that is easily accessible.

STUDENTS’ UNION

A presidential transition Kanwar Brar steps into his role as president & CEO and prepares for more students to arrive in the fall semester ERIN ABE LEAD REPORTER

Wilfrid Laurier University Students’ Union President & CEO Kanwar Brar officially stepped into his new position this past week.

Brar began the transition into the role immediately after his election in January.

His transition included shadowing former Students’ Union President & CEO Tyler Van Herzele.

Brar explained that preparation was the key to the confidence he now has in leading the Students’ Union.

“I have been put in a position where I feel very confident with what I am doing, and my team knows what we’re doing all together. We’re fit for these roles in the sense that we had all the preparation leading up to it,” Brar said.

In order to kick off the new Students’ Union team, a retreat was held from May 1 to May 3 for Brar, full time staff and two executive members.

The retreat saw members focused on getting to know each

other, working as a team, conflict resolution, crucial conversations, presentations and proposals in order to prepare for the upcoming year.

I have been put in a position where I feel very confident with what I am doing and my team knows what we’re doing ...

-Kanwar Brar, Students’ Union President

Much of Brar’s summer will focus on preparation and planning for the upcoming year.

Brar has taken over projects that were in the works this previous year, including the Turret reno-

vation project which he plans to finalize.

Brar will also be creating plans for projects that were presented during his election platform.

“Summer months are crucial for planning so we can start executing beginning in fall,” said Brar.

“My mentality is that I don’t want to rush into anything just because I’m excited about it or eager to complete it, it’s about addressing who are the key stakeholders.”

Brar plans to focus on being an effective CEO so he can be an efficient president.

“Too often … students don’t see the role as CEO, and the way I see it is that in order to be a good and efficient president, I also need to be an effective CEO,” Brar said.

By using this summer as a time to prepare and plan for the upcoming year, Brar will have more time to focus on responding to student needs once the majority of students are back in the fall semester. “[I want to be] your president who is reaching out to students proactively, instead of just waiting for issues to happen,” Brar said.

LUKE SAZARIN/LEAD PHOTOGRAPHER

NEWS • 5

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017 CAREER DEVELOPMENT

LUKE SARAZIN/LEAD PHOTOGRAPHER

Laurier lands top rank in nationwide study SAFINA HUSEIN SENIOR NEWS EDITOR

A national study ranked Wilfrid Laurier University number one for establishing the most impressive career services model amongst other Canadian post-secondary institutions.

Laurier’s high rank emerged from an independent study conducted by the Canadian Education and Research Institution for Counselling (CERIC).

CERIC is an organization that focuses on advancing education and research in career development

and counselling.

Their study analyzed the career development models of universities and colleges across Canada to determine which models were deemed the most effective and efficient.

“The report stemming from the study, ‘Insight into Canadian Post-Secondary Career Service Models,’ looked at four characteristics which make up an impressive model of career services delivery,” Jan Basso, assistant vice-president of experiential learning and career development, said.

The key elements included

evaluating services regularly, measuring outcomes, being proactive in delivery and being collaborative with campus stakeholders.

One of Laurier’s strengths includes the university’s focus on experiential learning, which ultimately provides students with a vast number of opportunities to gain career development and necessary skills.

Opportunities such as co-operative education, internships, laboratory experience, field placements and more provide students the chance to develop career-related skills.

One of the main ways that Laurier strives to implement their career services model is through the Centre for Experiential Learning and Career Development.

“When we look at the career centre’s vision, it’s that every student is engaged in their career development and an integral part of Laurier experience,” Basso said.

“In defining the vision in that way, it means we need to be providing comprehensive services to meet the needs of all students.”

According to various data, Basso said, students have indicated that it is decisions related to careers that lead them to pursuing post-secondary education.

“Students need to be engaged in the process. Taking the opportunity while you’re at university to explore options, to really get a better understanding of yourself, to look at career opportunities that might exist and make some good decisions based on experiences,” Basso said.

The career centre aids students throughout their undergraduate degree in order to match an individual’s interests to the correct programming or opportunities.

Basso explained that first and second-year students are given guidance surrounding summer and part-time jobs, whereas students in upper years begin to acquire information regarding skills, strategic volunteering and more.

“Working with the staff here in the [career centre] we provide [an] extensive number of individual appointments to talk [to individuals] about their particular career situation. We do about 7000 appointments annually through the career centre,” Basso said.

19 per cent of all appointments in the career centre are dedicated to helping students pursue or gain information about further education.

According to Laurier’s graduate survey for the class of 2015, 33 per cent of Laurier graduates have pursued further education upon finishing their undergraduate degree. The career centre runs over 600 workshops and events each year for students to participate in.

Students need to be engaged in the process. Taking the opportunity while you’re at university to explore options ...

-Jan Basso, assistant vice-president of experiential learning and career development

In a student engagement survey that was filled out by approximately 1000 Laurier students, 84 per cent of undergraduate students claimed to have engaged with the career centre in some shape or form.

“Whether it was by an appointment, a workshop, connecting through our website, using the resources that we have, [or] seeing us in our classrooms because we’re out delivering programming,” Basso said.

“We take a look at individual needs and try to develop specialized services to meet those needs.”

FUNDING

Career Kick-Start Strategy enhances experiential skills ERIN ABE LEAD REPORTER

On April 27, the Government of Ontario announced that $190 million will be invested over the next three years into the new Career Kick-Start Strategy.

The new Career Kick-Start Strategy program has been created in order to combat the challenges many university graduates face when searching for stable and secure employment.

The Career Kick-Start Strategy encourages experiential learning in order for students to be able to better build their resumes and gain more hands-on experience in possible career fields.

“A lot of students find that there are a lot of challenges in regards to finding a career after they graduate, the government is now addressing that students should be having [a] hands on or jobs/ skills oriented experience that is outside of the classroom, in order to build their skills and experience to get careers,” Stephanie Bellotto, vice-president of University Affairs, said.

Experiential learning has been a large focus for both Laurier and Ontario Undergraduate Student Alliance (OUSA).

“The main emphasis of experiential learning is to bridge the gap between in-class learning and the skills that employers are looking for potential employees to have when they’re hired,” Ian Muller, director of policy, research & advocacy for the Students’ Union, said.

A lot of students find that there are a lot of challenges in regards to finding a career after they graduate ...

Stephanie Bellotto, vice-president of University Affairs

Laurier already has a number of initiatives on campus that support experiential learning and this new investment will aid the university in continuing with these efforts in the coming years.

The Career Kick-Start Strategy will work to enhance the career resources that are already available.

For example, the program plans

ALAN LI/GRAPHICS EDITOR

to bring forth 100 paid internship opportunities for students.

Following the completion of their degree, students can work to pay off any debt they may have accumulated, in contrast to working

for free to gain experience, Bellotto said.

“The government has indicated that they’re going to be supporting more opportunities for paid internships, [and] encouraging both

universities and private employers to hire more students for work placements, co-op or other skilled based placements,” said Muller.

In addition to the paid internships that are being made available, the Career Kick-Start Strategy will also focus on investing in guidance and career counselling.

“There are many challenges to starting a career right out of post-secondary,” Bellotto said.

“This Career Kick-Start Strategy program can help transition [students] into careers and giv[e] people the experience needed to get those jobs.”

Although some of the new opportunities as a result of the funding are unknown at Laurier as of right now, the government hopes that the new strategy program will ultimately enhance the main experiential learning initiatives that Laurier already attains, in addition to creating more new opportunities.

“We won’t know the specifics,” Muller said, “but its encouraging because it emphasizes experiential learning which increasingly recognizes helping to allow students to take in-class learning and be able to translate it into ready skills so they are able to have a better opportunity to get employment once they graduate.”

6 • GAMES

Dear Life

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017 SUDOKU

Dear Life is your opportunity to write a letter to your life, allowing you to vent your anger with life’s little frustrations in a completely public forum.

All submissions to Dear Life are anonymous, should be no longer than 100 words and must be addressed to your life. Submissions can be sent to dearlife@thecord.ca no later than Monday at noon each week.

Dear The Cord staff, I’m so excited for the next year!

With this team, we can accomplish anything!

Sincerely, Happy manager Dear Life, Roses are red Violets are blue The Cord is awesome SUCC Sincerely, A boy that misses his ape Dear Safina, You are such a great leader and I’m so glad you’re in the role you are.

You’re going to do so many great things!

Sincerely, Positive vibes Dear Life, Varus give me uhh my legions *Legion machine broke* BRUH FIXX DAT JOINT Sincerely, Augustus’ Dank Meme Stash Dear Life, Burrito Boyz has the best burritos in Waterloo. Try the yam naked burrito with everything on it.

Delicious.

Sincerely, Burrito Bitch Dear Life, Why is there such a thing as WorldStar? And why do I have that feeling I got after watching Fight Club?

Sincerely, Fresh Meat Dear Life, Things are going great. Got the new squad rolling up and I’m excited to see where we go.

Sincerely, W.D.

WORD SEARCH

DOGGY-DOO EQUITY INCUBATOR KANWAR CAREERS EXPERIENTIAL SUPERHEROES HUMANZ OUTLAW STORYTELLERS WENDY’S TECHNOLOGY GIRLBOSS GRADES DRAFT ALL-STAR

ARTS & LIFE • 7

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017

Arts & Life

ARTS & LIFE EDITOR SHYENNE MACDONALD arts@thecord.ca

GRAPHIC NOVELS

Comparing the comics

ALAN LI/GRAPHICS EDITOR

DOMINIC ASSELIN CORD ARTS

A superhero has been defined by major media as someone with extraordinary abilities who ensures the protection of others, sometimes by putting themselves in harm’s way.

The superheroes that have been a part of so many childhoods, however, do more than that.

The superheroes we see in the major companies, DC and Marvel, provide an escape from the real world into a universe where the everyday person can feel as invincible as Superman.

For as long as I can remember,

I have loved and been inspired by everything from my childhood’s early morning obsession with Justice League, that aired every Saturday, to the blockbuster movies that seem to come out every single month.

Yet these characters do more than entertain and provide an escape; the movies, comics, and shows are a platform that have the ability to challenge how we run society in new and interesting ways.

Recently, both major comic giants Marvel and DC released a reboot on their respective universes.

For DC, it was a chance to change the outrage from The New 52 while Marvel has taken the opportunity

to show its readers it cares about real world issues.

DC Rebirth was launched in May 2016 and All-New, All-Different Marvel, also known as Marvel Now, came out in June 2015.

Each brought many changes and attempted to tackle real-life problems of racism, inequality and the past lack of representation and diversity in comic books.

For example, Iron Man, who has been depicted as successful Tony Stark for as long as the character was first introduced, will now be a young black student named Riri Williams who at only 15 years of age creates her very own Iron Man armour.

However, DC and Marvel have been in the spotlight for their questionable story arcs that exploit fascism.

Marvel infamously made Captain America a sleeper agent for the antagonist Hydra and DC introduced Nightwing New Order.

Wherein Nightwing introduces nazism as a method of heroism.

On the DC side of things, they are set to introduce a new Chinese Superman by the name of Kenan Kong, who will lead China’s version of the Justice League.

Brittany Tenhage, a comic fan for over seven years and an avid DC reader, felt the respective reboots were necessary and were a positive change, but feels that DC still has a long way to go.

“I really like that they have introduced John Diggle as a regular in Green Arrow. It adds diversity to its cast of characters,” Tenhage said.

“I like what they have done by adding new characters, and changing the races of some characters.”

“But at the same time, they took a character like Huntress, who was a woman of colour, and they made her white again in Rebirth. That was a poor decision on their part.”

In Marvel’s reboot the roster of big name superheroes saw a dramatic change, with a goal of reaching a bigger demographic while still appealing to its already massive fan base.

As Jaclyn Austin, comic fan of five years, puts it: “One of the things they did best was how they really shook up

the roster of heroes. They really changed who was wearing the mask: Sam Wilson became Captain America, Jane Foster became Thor and Miles Morales became Spiderman.”

“I think this was kind of awesome because they really changed up how people thought of traditional characters. Captain America was now a black man and Thor was now a woman. I felt it brought in more representation for their universe,” she said.

One of the things they did best was how they really shook up the roster of heroes.

They really changed who was wearing the mask.

-Jaclyn Austin, comic fan

When looking at the two reboots, it seems that Marvel has made more significant changes than DC. Marvel has created worlds where the casual reader can not only appreciate and understand the changes, but can relate them to everyday, real life issues.

Disclaimer: Brittany Tenhage is a staff writer for The Cord

MUSIC

A happily never after for Humanz by Gorillaz The bands latest album takes a politically charged prespective that leaves a bleak impression

KARLIS WILDE FEATURES EDITOR

With a single musician and a single cartoonist making up the core of the group, a Gorillaz album is an odd cultural product that works not just as music, but also as a commentary on the state of the industry.

There has been something special about this digitally crafted, hip-hop/rock ensemble from the beginning.

The breadth of space between their records (their last LP, The Fall, came out in 2010) assists in lending prominence to each and every release they unleash.

The world has seen vast changes since Gorillaz released their first single, “Clint Eastwood”, in 2001.

It was a musical space that was ruled by Lifehouse’s “Hanging by a Moment”: a substantive phase of post-90s pop rock, with crooning Rob Thomas-esque voices blaring

overtop of jangly, softly-distorted guitars.

But Gorillaz set themselves apart as a funky, hip-hop and rock blend.

Boasting the vocals of Blur’s Damon Albarn as the lead character, the timely cartoon videos and the cool music shook up the industry.

In the time since, they’ve only become bigger and bigger.

They are a tribute to defeatism that fails to ring any notes of sincerity. There isn’t a moment where Humanz feels like a Gorillaz album.

CONTRIBUTED IMAGE

Maybe that’s why Humanz, the latest installment from the fictional band, feels so flat.

Instead of vaulting off any kind of creative inspiration, the group

opted for something that sounds as dull and monotonous as anything else experiencing success on the radio.

Humanz feels more like a victory lap; an album for an album’s sake.

Not any kind of passion project.

Worse than that, Humanz is an

LP about accepting defeat.

Written in early 2016 as a projection of an impossible world where Donald Trump somehow won the American presidency, the present reality makes the dark, defeated philosophy strewn throughout the LP seem devoid of hope.

“The sky’s falling baby/Drop that ass ‘fore it crash” and “We got the power to be loving each other/No matter what happens we got the power to do that.”

Both just prescribe simple, hedonistic methods of coping within a terrible world. Humanz is not a cohesive album — the entire project is misdirected and just not good.

There’s no “Stylo,” no “Clint Eastwood,” just a series of bland tracks that blend together into a forgettable way to make 49 minutes feel even longer.

“Saturn Barz,” the lead single, puts the group in the background, and functions more as a Popcaan track than a Gorillaz one.

They are a tribute to defeatism that fails to ring any notes of sincerity.There isn’t a moment where Humanz feels like a Gorillaz album; it’s more of a homogenized playlist with some cool moments and a lot of filler.

Conceptually, it’s interesting, though mostly dull. Humanz feels like a misdirected effort for the world’s greatest fictional band; it’s a record of defeat dedicated to an age that needs exactly the opposite.

8 • ARTS & LIFE

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017

CONCERT

Exploring outlaw rock LUKE SARAZIN/LEAD PHOTOGRAPHER

MATTHEW COONS CORD ARTS

If you find yourself around Victoria Park, you may come across The Boathouse, a rustic yet modern space with craft brew abound and subtle lighting that dances across the river. The Boathouse also doubles as a place to watch live music.

On May 6, a band by the name of Run Coyote was the headlining act.

I had to hit the GRT at about 7pm to make sure I was there on time for the doors to open.

Making a quick stop to the bank I procured the money that I would later learn was not needed for the cover charge, as my photographer and I, were graciously on the guest list. We took our seats waiting for the show to begin, taking in the

atmosphere as the first performer took to the stage to do a sound check.

Accompanied by the sounds of a Roland synth, drum pad and ukulele, a girl by the name of Jojo Worthington began her performance.

During each of the performances that night I made certain that I noted everything of interest, in the case of Jojo my first note for her is as follows: “A grand cosmic journey through sound.” And I certainly still stand behind this statement.

The style of music can best be described as new age, infusing fresh beats with vocals, all being put through a loop pedal. Her performance ended with a cover of a Bjork song.

After Jojo’s performance, a band from Ottawa took to the stage.

The band, called Shadowhand, could be best described as rock in its most sweet and soulful state, yet they still managed to emit an essence of power and presence.

Its the kind of music that makes nights out special, nights that one can remember long after.

Their style can best be described as rock ‘n’ roll combined with old western film scores.

Finally, after Shadowhand had finished, fresh off the dusty trail from Toronto, Run Coyote took to the stage.

Run Coyote, formed in Toronto by brothers Sam and Jake Allen, with Amanda Grant on bass and

Jeremy Ramos-Foley on drums.

Debuting their first album back in 2014 titled Youth Haunts, with two singles preceding simply titled “Rain On” and “Stranger (In my own home)”, Run coyote have made a name for themselves with their own unique brand of rock.

Their style can best be described as rock ‘n’ roll combined with old western film scores.

Clint Eastwood’s Fistful of Dollars would be the first movie to come to mind when hearing their music and truly they live up to the style and attitude of Eastwood’s character in those films. In their own words, located within the bio section of their official website: “The band soundtracks a mix of late nights on city streets and Western landscapes through twangy guitars and 60’s arrangements and rhythms.”

Perhaps the style of music can — for the sake of simplicity — be labeled “outlaw rock”.

Whatever the style of music may

be called, the band itself and the music that they play is harmonious and wonderful, cold and dark at times, while also being deep and atmospheric at other times.

When they performed at The Boathouse, roses were placed around the microphone stand, for no reason other than to enhance the style and flare of the performance.

The band performed many songs from their album, as well as new songs yet to be released, “Silver Pistol,” being a stand out.

For one song, the lead singer Sam Allen took out a flashlight to simulate the firing of a pistol — overall a fun and imaginative performance with good music and fantastic atmosphere.

I left wondering what the future holds in store for Run Coyote, as their performance and composition can hang with the best of the best. I, for one, hope to see more albums and more success from Run Coyote in the near future.

PERFORMANCE ART

A community shares folktales, anecdotes and music The Button Factory hosts Baden Storytellers’ Guild for an evening of stories and apple cider

EMILY WAITSON OPINION EDITOR

Presented by the Baden Storytellers’ Guild, Stories Aloud is an event hosted at Button Factory Arts the second Friday of every month from Sept until June.

These nights are intended to showcase the medium of traditional oral storytelling, encouraging audience members to participate and share their own tales if they feel inspired to do so.

The atmosphere at Button Factory is warm and inviting, complete with an inescapable coziness that makes it feel like you’re stepping into someone’s home, as opposed to a quirky community art centre.

On May 12, I had the opportunity to sit in the Stories Aloud evening. It was quickly apparent that these nights are popular with a crowd who attends them regularly, many of them addressing each other by name.

The facilitators endeavor to

make every person feel welcome however, so after brief introductions from newcomers, everyone seemed to be completely comfortable.

Five stories were read before the intermission, each one entirely different from the last.

With a diverse range in content and style, the women who shared these pieces were clearly well versed in their craft.The break was initiated with casual conversation and everyone milling around the room with mugs of apple cider.

The intimacy that could be felt from the event was inescapable, the small size of the group worked in favour of this, and encouraged a level of relaxation that made the night more enjoyable.

Talking to the people there shed light on how much storytelling means to them and how they’ve truly integrated it into their lives.

The passion amongst them was palpable — from Judy Caulfield, who used storytelling extensively throughout her career as a teacher.

Mary McCullum Baldasaro, who has performed in various schools, libraries and festivals.

Commencing the second half

DIANE OLIVIA TAYLOR/STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER

of the evening led into song, an upbeat way of focalizing a story through the style of music, mixing up the styles in which each performance was led.

Anecdotes were my favourite story of choice, adding a level of depth and closeness between the speakers and the audience.

Carolyn Wilker shared heartfelt stories from her childhood about her father, proving that there is an immense amount of courage and talent involved in storytelling — specifically when sharing the ones closest to you.

Every speaker had their own

unique element and story to bring to the table, highlighting different stories that I likely would not have known about or heard outside of that room.

This was an aspect which many of the attendees there seemed to thrive on, as there was no telling what story could be told next.

The night capped off with self proclaimed “storyteller addict” Neil, who was one of my personal favourites to watch and listen to.

The way he spoke was so natural and content that it felt like he wasn’t even on a stage in front of a microphone.

Both funny and intriguing, he held the group’s attention in a way that seemed effortless.

Creating an atmosphere that feels like it’s taking place in someone’s living room isn’t an easy feat, but Stories Aloud accomplished just that.

It was an enjoyable, unique session that promoted complete inclusiveness and encouragement, allowing newcomers to feel welcomed and eager to return.

Storytelling is an artform that deserves attention, something which Button Factory Arts houses quite well.

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017

• 9

Editorial

OPINION EDITOR EMILY WAITSON opinion@thecord.ca

Should faculty be paid by the demand of their work? that teach the more profitable subject matter are seen as more deserving of higher pay.

Business as a whole is competitive when it is matched against arts programs that struggle to meet the same level of need.

The problem that exists rests on how pay can be fairly distributed between faculty members that have markedly different influxes of students.

In order to keep up with the expectations of students and support their evolving learning needs, it is essential for arts programs to keep updating their material and education styles in order to increase enthusiasm and demand.

No matter how many students a professor teaches or what department they’re in, each individual should be paid based on their qualifications and achievements, above all else.

University faculty across different departments often experience discernible wage differences, regardless of whether or not they are equally, or in some cases more qualified, in their respective fields of work.

While the department of business draws a larger amount of students into their program than music or English, there are several factors that can determine the level of interest that is garnered from each range of study.

The arts have the unfortunate reputation of producing less valuable degrees that are more difficult to apply to real world circumstances.

Business on the other hand, is promoted continuously as the pragmatic, economically successful program that pays off all of the work that’s expelled into it.

Because of this, the professors

Crime, social media and the desire to witness violence Rather than intervening in these questionable situations, people have taken to filming them and passively watching as alternatives.

A proclivity towards violence is inevitable for some, whether it’s being a bystander and witnessing it online, or finding a release for that aggression through the consumption of violent content.

Although social media has created an opportunity to indirectly engage countless numbers of strangers in illegal activities, it has also provided the ability to highlight violence that was once unseen. It focalizes issues that people may have had no previous knowledge about — like police brutality.

Social media platforms may have the ability to alter our judgments about some elements within our inherently violent society.

But they also provide us with the means to release some of that aggression and a place to discuss it in ways that are more positive and constructive.

The progression and evolution of social media has ensured that witnessing crimes, even while they’re in the process of taking place, can be readily accessible to any person, at anytime.

There is no limitations on who can utilize these platforms for their own needs, even if it involves showcasing a murder or the admittance of terrible crimes that were committed before any consequences were considered.

Assault and physical violence are viewed humorously on websites like WorldStarHipHop and LiveLeak – sites that exploit violent behaviour for views, likes, shares and laughs – regardless of the ethical implications attached to them.

Due to the content that is constantly available online, it becomes difficult to believe what is real and what is not, especially in regards to actual harm being inflicted on another person.

The line between internet jokes and reportable occurrences of law-breaking has become blurred.

These unsigned editorials are based off informal discussions and then agreed upon by the majority of The Cord’s editorial board, including the Editor-in-Chief and Opinion Editor. The arguments made may reference any facts that have been made available through interviews, documents or other sources. The views presented do not necessarily reflect those of The Cord’s volunteers, staff or WLUSP.

THE CORD IS PUBLISHED BY WILFRID LAURIER UNIVERSITY STUDENT PUBLICATIONS 205 REGINA ST. N., WATERLOO

WLUSP ADMINISTRATION BOARD OF DIRECTORS

DIRECTOR Rosalind Horne

CHAIR Andreas Patsiaouros

TREASURER John Pehar

VICE-CHAIR Lisa Irimescu DIRECTOR Benjamin Cooke DIRECTOR Noa Salamon

PRESIDENT Andreas Patsiaouros president@wlusp.com FINANCE MANAGER Randy Moore randy@rcmbrooks. com ADVERTISING MANAGER Caroline Schummer care.schummer@ wlusp.com

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR Lakyn Barton lakyn.barton@wlusp. com HR MANAGER Paige Bush hr@wlusp.com CORPORATE SECRETARY Noa Salamon

ALAN LI/GRAPHICS EDITOR

Blurred lines of appropriation KARLIS WILDE FEATURES EDITOR

In an issue devoted to Indigenous writing, Write Editor Hal Niedzviecki suggested that writers should examine the world by imagining perspectives outside of themselves. That cultural appropriation is a positive thing.

Unfortunately for him, the modern liberal world is obsessed with a concept I refer to as ‘positive segregation’: the enforced preservation of separately sacred, individual cultural and ethnic identities.

There’s precedent for this kind of mentality all throughout history. In building modern, western culture, the white man has co-opted concepts from others to make them his own. Elvis Presley is one of the most prominent examples of this, where the feel and attitude of black music was taken and transformed for white audiences.

The problem with suggesting that Niedzviecki’s article is an objectively incorrect piece is that there is no inherent morality to a culture’s ownership.

It’s only by creating our own rules and working around them that we can make any suggestion of a structured morality. Our perception of culture is a social construct.

Niedzviecki’s suggestion is in poor taste, but it isn’t the kind of statement someone should be afraid to make. Art is supposed to live independently of its artist and it’s only in allowing ourselves to think outside of our heads — by not prescribing that white men can only reasonably write about white men — that we keep from restricting art.

Culture is an abstract concept and it isn’t inherently tied into a skin colour of bloodline. Why are we trying to package a new brand of ‘whites only’ and ‘blacks only’ and ‘aboriginals only’ systems?

Inevitably all this does is create a wider cultural divide.

Absolutely, culture should promote non-white literature — publishing more books by diverse voices, not pretend ones performed by white people, is what lends to a more comprehensive vision of the world.

But that doesn’t mean that thinking outside the box and imagining other cultures and concepts isn’t a valid artistic method.

While a white person’s novel about an Indigenous character isn’t likely to validly capture what it is to be Indigenous, that doesn’t mean there’s a crime in writing those characters; books aren’t only about truthfully representing cultures. They’re about beauty, they’re about the human experience, they’re about sword fights and magic.

Books are humungous, import-

ant things with a million different purposes. If we distill the limits of their experience to fight for a hyper-specific, play-nice political ideology, we’re policing art. And, thereby, restricting culture.

The fact that someone could receive a vitriolic response to suggesting that people attempt to see the world through eyes other than their own to the point that they had to resign from their editorial job is disgusting.

Culture is an abstract concept and it isn’t inherently tied into a skin colour or bloodline.

You know what the actual result of the complaints was? A bunch of morons took to Twitter and founded an actual ‘cultural appropriation’ prize as a reaction.

Congratulations, positive segregationists of the Internet. By promoting censorship, you’ve only furthered the us vs. them mentality that leads to racism and xenophobia.

10 •

Opinion

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017 OPINION EDITOR EMILY WAITSON opinion@thecord.ca

Wendy’s social media serves up fresh roasts CHRIS LUCIANTONIO STAFF WRITER

If you have been on Twitter recently, you may have inexplicably noticed an abundant amount of fan art depicting the mascot for the Wendy’s fast food chain.

Often portrayed either demure, winsome or disturbingly sultry, this recent outpouring of “brand fandom” is the unlikely and unfortunate product of corporations getting wise to the Twitter-sphere. @Wendys has become a regular “who to follow” after it has begun to engage in actions typical of popular figures on the website.

Be it through starting “twitter beef” with other fast food chains, trading insults with followers, or making popular references, this official branch of the Wendy’s marketing team has come to be seen as a real personality.

So much so that the bevy of talented independent artists that populate the site have begun drawing the logo as if it were a real person, personifying the snarky persona cultivated on the account

and making this phenomenon certifiably viral.

All in good fun right? But is anybody else somewhat disturbed by the idea of being Twitter pals with a multi-billion dollar corporation just because they hired somebody who “gets” social media?

Do not be tricked into thinking Wendy’s is just trying to make you laugh or brighten your day like the other accounts you follow.

The real aim behind Wendy’s corporate Twitter account is not just to have you retweet and follow, but for you to log off twitter, drive down to your local Wendy’s and stuff your face with Baconators and Frostees.

We should not be celebrating the fact that corporations are becoming social media savvy because it represents the adaptable and incessant arm of contemporary capitalism that often makes advertising seem friendly and fun.

Whether it was promising some random teenager a year’s supply of chicken if he could get 18 million retweets, or cattily insulting people who register complaints, the real intent has always been getting you, the consumer, to do their marketing for them.

And this sentiment applies to all business twitter accounts that try to appear like average people you’d

Do not get tricked into thinking Wendy’s is just trying to make you laugh or brighten your day like the other accounts you follow.

LUKE SARAZIN/LEAD PHOTOGRAPHER

come across on your timeline.

Be it @Dennys, who have appropriated the esoteric charms of “weird twitter”, or @Arbys, whose account posts nerdy fan art made out of curly fries, the intentions remain the same; you do the marketing for them.

The recent viral popularity of the Wendy’s account means other restaurant chains will try this.

We are not far off from Colonel Sanders sharing memes or Ronald McDonald claiming their burgers are “lit, fam.”

It is also worth mentioning that

The problem with all of this is that we live in a capitalist society.

Capitalism is awesome, because it challenges every person to be the best that they can be and gives them fiscal rewards for doing so.

But if we remove every workplace opportunity, where do the funds to drive this society come from?

Automating jobs ruins the whole economy because it takes the equitable dispensation of cash flow and automatically reroutes it to the top — to the owners of said technology.

ALAN LI/GRAPHIC EDITOR

Terminating all the technology KARLIS WILDE FEATURES EDITOR

The past few years have been weird and our culture has seen a meteoric rise in inverted values.

Globalism has evaporated to nationalism, the universally held value of an education has transformed into anti-intellectualism, etc.

What’s valuable about this type

of role reversal is that it suggests a reframing of our unquestioned values. By applying different hypothetical starting points, we are allowed to reframe our world and make some staggering realizations.

The most significant of these recent discoveries is this: technology is the devil.

This can be difficult to accept: “No, Karl,” you might say, “technology is the hero we need, nay, deserve.”

But I assure you now that technology — that beautiful, virginal flower — has only come to destroy you and all that you love.

Humanity, at its best, tends away

from sloth. Laziness is considered derogatory to the person and the society; idle hands are devil’s playthings.

That’s why we need to recognize the extent to which jobs have turned to automation and just how inherently flawed such a post-labour society is.

McDonald’s has replaced their ordering stations with digital, touch-screen kiosks. Factory labour is becoming more and more automated by robots. Applications have been developed to distill minor legal proceedings down to the press of a button. Self-driving cars are being developed.

But I assure you now that technology — that beautiful, virginal flower — has only come to destroy you and everything you love.

And that’s not all: let’s talk about fake news for moment. Such a phenomenon would not be even remotely possible were it not for the egalitarian model of the worldwide-web.

By providing an equal platform for every single voice, we’re distilling value. Your ten-year-old sister’s blog, masked by graphics, could make a believable claim to be as

the manner in which @Wendys “roasts” other users has lead to the creation of a lot of sexualized fan art.

Applauding a company for insulting its customer base was disturbing enough, but I honestly cannot think of a better metaphor for the evils of capitalism than scores of dudes online pleasuring themselves to a logo. Our fast food preferences should not hinge on which mascot we find most sexually attractive, otherwise I’d never eat at Burger King again.

It could very well be that I am the only one who finds this subversive form of marketing unsettling.

But I choose not to follow companies on Twitter because Twitter has enough ads as it is.

valuable as the Washington Post.

Worst of all, let’s not pretend that artificial intelligence is a truly terrifying thing.

The internet serves as a hive mind that we voluntarily input the entire aggregated knowledge of human history.

If we ever succeed in fully turning that into an authentic artificial intelligence, it’s only logical that, based on our horrible treatment of our planet, this supercomputer will generally believe us obsolete and allow all of humanity to die off.

It’s the next pragmatically logical step in evolution — if we make something better than ourselves, we become redundant.

Our modern society likes to believe that technology is always a progressive climb forward, but this is false.

History has worked in waves of technology, with peaks and pitfalls.

We’ve been on an upward trajectory for too long; it’s time to come back down.

Friends, countrymen: I say to you now, that this is the time for us to switch off the internet.

For humanity to survive indefinitely, we must make some extreme course corrections in how we choose to approach our idea of civilization.

Let’s cling to the romantic associations we have that cause us to prefer vinyl records to MP3s and physical books to eBooks, by giving up on technology.

This will allow the human race to progress through alternative avenues into the bright, distant, eternal future.

OPINION • 11

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017

The real life “Nasty Gal” EMLY WAITSON OPINION EDITOR

Trending through popular social media feeds at every turn as of late, has been the proudly emboldened phrase “#Girlboss.”

A term popularized by Nasty Gal clothing company founder — and rags to riches self-starter — Sophia Amoruso.

This term has been utilized by scores of women since, who feel inspired by its surface-level intent.

Amoruso’s seemingly empowering book — and the Netflix series that it spawned — are both examples of proposed feminism that have about as much depth as a toilet bowl.

It appeals to absolutely everyone because its meaning is perpetuated to be sunny and unassuming. “#Girlboss” gives the impression of a condescending adult bending down to the level of a smiley, naive little girl and telling her that she can be whatever she wants one day, even if it’s something as ridiculously unachievable as the CEO of a clothing company.

It’s a pat-on-the-head, patronizing thumbs-up that has no real

meaning behind it. Rather, it’s a way to make everyone feel like they’re an active supporter of the feminist movement, especially in the age of the modern, working-class woman.

It appeals to absolutely everyone because its meaning is perpetuated to be sunny and unassuming.

Girlboss as a show lands in it’s own separate category of vapid self-entitlement.

It is driven by a main character who is nothing but a narcissistic child that masks her shitty behaviour behind a guise of constantly stressed independence.

Her continuously questionable decisions are justified as a necessity for her to thrive as a successful business woman in a male-dominated society overrun with assholes.

I don’t have a problem with

characters — specifically female ones — who can be inherently unlikeable, even if they are the central focus on their own show.

However, Girlboss has crafted one of the most instantaneously annoying, infuriatingly self-absorbed screen presences that I’ve seen since Hannah Horvath on HBO’s Girls.

A discernable difference between these two fictional women though, is that Sophia Amoruso is intended to be a role model and example for young feminists everywhere.

Her continuous instances of immaturity, law-breaking (she seems to steal whatever she can get her hands on), complete disregard for basic social graces and overall attitude towards life don’t make her seem anything but annoying.

This again is in contrast to the savvy queen of achievement she is demonstrated to be.

The message that stands behind success should not be wrapped in a bubble of rudeness that makes someone seem like a no-bullshit kind of leader.

It also should not be such a deep-rooted obnoxiousness that you can’t stand a word coming from a person’s mouth because they sound so incredibly whiny and selfish.

Regardless of your gender, being an asshole who sits on their own

CONTRIBUTED IMAGE

throne of arrogance will only mark you as someone to be disrespected.

This idea is exemplified by the real life Amoruso; Her gritty, grungy business style that matches her company’s clothes isn’t as faultless as it may seem at first glance.

Despite the hands-on-the-hips portrait of resilience that sits defiantly on the cover of her book, Amoruso’s company has come under fire for various reasons over the last few years.

Between filing for bankruptcy, numerous employee layoffs, complaints about working conditions and management styles and even Amoruso stepping down as CEO of

her own company, her #Girlboss image takes quite the hit when it doesn’t match up to her actions off of the pages.

The countless issues that are connected with Girlboss as a show, a trend and as a standard for women everywhere, help to further the idea that women have to follow specific ideals in order to achieve success.

Be whatever kind of boss you want to be. Or don’t be one at all.

It’s up to you how you take charge of your own life and I certainly wouldn’t use Sophia Amoruso as an example of how to do it the #Girlboss way.

Grading your intelligence MADELINE MCINNIS CREATIVE DIRECTOR

TANZEEL SAYANI/PHOTO EDITOR

Back in grade nine, I had a teacher who didn’t ever take any real notice to her students’ personal lives.

To me, that made her interest, when it did happen, even more memorable.

After a particularly hard test, one of my friends continued to ask what grade I received, even after several times of me trying to politely avoid the question.

“I actually don’t share my grades,” I remember saying. “What I got is what I got and I want to be proud of that without comparing it to everyone else.”

My teacher overheard and commented that she wished more students thought like that. I agree.

In a competitive world, it’s hard not to be competitive about everything. If you and your friend are going for the exact same job, it’s comforting to think that you have a one-up on them, even if that’s as simple as the quick relief of doing better on a test.

With all of our final grades from the winter term rolling in seeing the posts about GPAs can be disheartening, and chasing that feeling of intelligence and adequacy by posting your own accomplishments always seems like an option.

But it’s a double-edged sword.

If you got a better grade than your friends, you run the risk of making them feel inadequate in themselves, the same way you feel when you hear about their higher grades.

That’s not a very friendly thing to do. At the same time, if you have a grade that you’re not proud of, laughing it off may seem like a good idea until your friend gets the 12 point GPA you studied hard to receive and fell short of.

There are countless memes about feeling shitty about a low grade and having someone else brag about their high grade. Don’t be that guy. Literally no one likes to talk to that guy.

You never know how your friend is feeling about their intelligence based on a letter grade, and the easiest way to avoid that situation is to avoid the discussion all together. Besides, a great grade for one person may be devastating to another, depending on goals and expectations.

It’s hard to see who is doing “better” in the real world, where the perceptions are subjective and often aren’t known by the generalpublic. There is a certain humility that comes from being in the dark as to who is the smartest or most successful in the room.

When we place a quantifiable grade from one to 12 on our intelligence, that number can define who we are, and it really shouldn’t.

At the end of the day, “I did well” should be enough.

Save your GPA for where you put your other skills and where it really

matters — on your resume.

By all means, work hard and be proud of what you have achieved, but there is no point in making a competition out of every aspect of your university career, especially when you don’t need to.

In a competitive world, it’s hard not to be competitive about everything.

Save that competitive spirit and the big guns, namely your 12 point — GPA two semesters in a row, for the interview for your dream job.

Humility and thoughtfulness are things I truly believe will be rewarded in the long run.

If you’re really confident in your intelligence and you feel smart, your validation should come from people recognizing that through how you express yourself in your interactions, not from shoving grades in their faces in a false race to a non-existent finish line.

In the words of the great modern philosopher Cady Heron: “Calling someone stupid won’t make you any smarter.”

12 •

Sports

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17, 2017 SPORTS EDITOR PRANAV DESAI sports@thecord.ca

MEN’S FOOTBALL

Three Golden Hawks are drafted into CFL ABDULHAMID IBRAHIM LEAD SPORTS REPORTER

Right now is the time of year all fans of football, whether university level or professional, are excited about.

For those of you who are strictly fans of professional football this is the part of the offseason you are probably most excited about; because your hope is that your team gets stronger through the draft.

There is also the mystery of seeing how these prospects pan out for those respective teams.

For those who are fans of university football it’s the time of year you see your favourite players move up to a higher level of football.

This year, Wilfrid Laurier University was represented through three players who had the honour of being drafted to the CFL. Defensive end Kwaku Boateng from Milton, Ont. linebacker Nakas Onyeka from Brampton, Ont. and offensive lineman Brett Golding, hailing from Dunnville, Ont. all got drafted on May 7.

“The entire Laurier football community is excited for Nakas, Kwaku and Brett,” head coach, Michael

my hometown, it’s amazing.”

As for his goals, Onyeka said he first wants to “crack the roster,” adding that he “feel[s] like [he] will be able to push to compete.”

Kwaku Boateng was drafted in round five as well (41 overall), but to the Edmonton Eskimos.

In regards to falling to round number five, Boateng hinted that a recent NFL invitation to the Chicago Bears’ mini-camp may have hurt him.

“It could be an array of things,” Boateng said.

“At the end of the day, I’ve always been a fan of saying that it doesn’t matter when I go, as opposed to where I go, and I think

Edmonton’s a good fit.”

When asked how he felt about going into rookie mini-camp with the Chicago Bears, Boateng said, “I think it’s intimidating. Having to play out of my position, playing linebacker at the highest level of football possible, having to do that and make that jump at the same time … I think it’s going to be tough.”

Boateng was ranked number 12 in the final scouting bureau rankings.

He is Laurier’s all-time sack leader and is also a two-time all-Canadian.

When asked what his goals were going in as a rookie he said, “I think definitely, my goal is to make an impact on special teams.

I feel like I will be able to make an impact on all the coverages and that’s where I want to make my mark and then eventually I want to fight for at least a rotational player on defense.”

“I feel confident just based on the fact that I am here,” Boateng added.

“There’s obviously a reason why I’m in this situation so I just have to take it one day at a time.”

“If I had to pick one year [to make it], it would be my last and I was fortunate enough for that to happen and I’m also fortunate enough to play at the end with my best friend, Nicole. Of course I was against her in the all-star game but it was great,” she said.

As for coach Falco’s thoughts on the game, he said, “[It] was nice

to see the two of them playing together.”

“They had to guard each other which was sort of funny because they were on opposite teams,” he said.

“I was able to go down for the game and I thought that they performed well and represented the team and the program very well.”

WILL HUANG/FILE PHOTO

Faulds said.

Brett Golding went in round seven (58 overall) to the Hamilton Tiger-Cats.

Not having been projected as a top prospect at any point or even being slated to get drafted in any of the mock drafts, Golding is proof that nobody knows what will happen until draft day.

He will now go in to try and make the roster.

From there, he will hopefully work his way to becoming another impact player hailing from Laurier in the CFL. Nakas Onyeka ended up going in round five (36 overall) to the Toronto Argonauts.

The linebacker had his finest season in his last year as he was named a first team all-Canadian.

Additionally, Onyeka was named OUA defensive player of the year.

When asked where he was at mentally given the current circumstance, Onyeka said, “I feel like I don’t want to get too high … it’s good that I accomplished one of my goals but it’s just a step in the process, right?”

As for being drafted to the Argos, Onyeka expressed excitement at the fact that he gets to play for his hometown team.

“I was born in Toronto, lived there for 8 years before I moved to Brampton, so being able to play for

WOMEN’S BASKETBALL

Hey now, you’re an all-star ABDULHAMID IBRAHIM LEAD SPORTS REPORTER

The time of the year has come where the season has wrapped up and school is over with.

This marks the arrival of the tenth annual Ontario University Athletics (OUA) Women’s Basketball All-Star game.

The game is made up of the OUA’s biggest stars, from the past season, with 10 university teams being represented to make up a total of 20 players – two of which were Golden Hawks.

Nicole Morrison, a fourth-year guard from Hamilton, made her second consecutive appearance after being Wilfrid Laurier University’s lone all-star from the 2015-16 season.

This time, she was joined by teammate Kaitlyn Schenck, a fifthyear guard from Kitchener, who enjoyed an outstanding season as Laurier’s leading scorer this past year.

“I think it’s obviously great for those two and great for the team and the program to be represented at the OUA level. They both had great years,” head coach, Paul Falco said.

“I thought Kaitlyn was exceptional last year and [played] her best year in her five years [here].

Obviously being recognized as an OUA all-star was appropriate and well-deserved.”

In regards to Morrison, Falco said, “it’s her second appearance, even though she had a bit of an injury-riddled season, she was able to play through some injuries and put up another good season.”

This game was made a little interesting for these two though, as they happened to end up on different teams, with Nicole Morrison being on Team McAleenan (head coach of the York Lions) and Kaitlyn Schenck being on Team Wilson (head coach of the Queen’s Gaels).

I’m glad I played with her for five years and not against her, that’s for sure.

-Kaitlyn Schenck, guard

“I’m glad I played with her for five years and not against her, that’s for sure,” Schenck said.

“It was awesome, I mean, it would have been better if we got to play together but it was fun being able to play against each other for once,” Morrison said of competing

against Schenck.

“It never really happens considering we’re on the same team but it was fun, we got to joke around a bit and have a fun time but it was nice to play with her one last time.”

The game was close at halftime; Team McAleenan was leading by 37-33. The third quarter was where that all changed.

Team McAleenan would push the lead to as many as 28 points towards the end of the third.

The closest Team Wilson would get from that point on was bringing themselves within 12 points (8371), but Team McAleenan ended up pulling away with a 92-77 victory.

Morrison was one of the top five scorers on Team McAleenan as she finished with 10 points.

Schenck finished the game with 8 points for Team Wilson.

“It was pretty awesome,” Morrison said, in regards to being on the winning team.

“Both teams have amazing players, so I think I was just lucky enough to have a great performance that day.”

“Everyone worked really, really hard and I didn’t really have to do too much since there was so many outstanding players, but [it was a] pretty cool experience,” she said.

When asked for her thoughts on being named an all-star for the first time during her final season, Schenck said, “it was amazing.”

ALEX TRKULJA/FILE PHOTOS