WAYS TO WELL-BEING ...A WELL-BEING COURSE FOR STUDENTS
WAYS TO WELL-BEING ...A WELL-BEING COURSE FOR STUDENTS
JOHN DORAN
TEACHER MANUAL
INSPIRING FUTURES
www. thesupergeneration .com
Published by The Super Generation 35 Finglas Business Park, Tolka Valley Road, Finglas, Dublin 11
Š 2015 John Doran waystowellbeing@yahoo.com
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If you would like information on further training on well-being for teachers or schools please contact info@thesupergeneration.com
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ISBN 978-0-9570161-3-2
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying and recording, without written permission of the publisher. Such written permission must also be obtained before any part of this publication is stored in a retrieval system of any nature. Requests for permission should be directed to The Super Generation, 35 Finglas Business Park, Tolka Valley Road, Finglas, Dublin 11 or info@thesupergeneration.com
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TABLE OF CONTENTS Overview FOREWORD
07
INTRODUCTION
13 25-158
MODULES GLOSSARY OF TERMS
161
SHORT FILM RESOURCES
163
1 Relationship with life
25
KNOWING ME, KNOWING YOU
28
LESSON 2
THE TREE OF GREATNESS
30
LESSON 3
INTRODUCING THE CONCEPT OF STRESS
33
LESSON 4
MINDFULNESS
35
LESSON 5
AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE: COUNTING OUR BLESSINGS
38
LESSON 6
FINDING THE HAPPINESS (H) FACTOR
40
LESSON 7
LIVING LIFE WITH A PURPOSE
43
LESSON 8
WHAT I VALUE THE MOST
47
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LESSON 1
2 Relationship with emotions
49
LESSON 9
EMOTIONS
53
LESSON 10
EMOTION MANAGEMENT
55
LESSON 11
CHANNELLING EMOTIONS
58
LESSON 12
FACING FEAR
60
LESSON 13
IT IS OKAY NOT TO FEEL OKAY
63
LESSON 14
EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE (EQ)
66
LESSON 15
BELIEFS
68
LESSON 16
UNDERSTANDING AND CHANGING LIMITING BELIEFS
70
LESSON 17
VALUING OURSELVES
74
3 Relationship with mindset, meaning and purpose
77
LESSON 18
REACTION TO EVENTS: INTRODUCING MINDSET
80
LESSON 19
GROWTH VERSUS FIXED MINDSET
83
LESSON 20
RESILIENCE
85
LESSON 21
STRENGTHS
88
LESSON 22
THE SUBCONSCIOUS MIND
90
LESSON 23
A LIFE OF MEANING AND PURPOSE
92
LESSON 24
GIVING BACK
94
4 Relationship with the past, present and future
100
THE CONCEPT OF FLOW
LESSON 26
LETTING GO
LESSON 27
THE GIFT
LESSON 28
BACK TO THE FUTURE
LESSON 29
YOUR BUCKET LIST
LESSON 30
THE GOLDEN TICKET: TIME
LESSON 31
BARRIERS TO RELATIONSHIPS
116
LESSON 32
LEARNING FROM THE SUCCESSFUL LIVES OF OTHERS
118
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LESSON 25
5 Relationship with personality, talent and performance
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97 103 106 109 112 114
121
LESSON 33
PERSONALITY
124
LESSON 34
ON THE RIGHT TRACK
130
LESSON 35
RELATIONSHIP TO PERFORMANCE UNDER PRESSURE AND GOAL SETTING
134
LESSON 36
PRESSURE SOLUTION STRATEGIES
137
LESSON 37
BENEFITS OF FAILURE
140
LESSON 38
RELATIONSHIP TO SLEEP, DIET AND EXERCISE
142
LESSON 39
THE POWER OF LISTENING
144
LESSON 40
FRIENDSHIP
146
LESSON 41
LIKING OURSELVES
150
LESSON 42
YOUR MISSION STATEMENT
153
LESSON 43
WAYS OF RESOLVING CONFLICT
156
For if dreams die Life is a broken – winged bird That cannot fly.
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Hold fast to dreams
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For when dreams go Life is a barren field
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Frozen with snow. Langston Hughes, 1902 - 1967
FOREWORD
Hold fast to dreams
Foreword
FOREWORD
by Brian Flannery
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This is what keeps us on our toes and what makes the job so interesting. However, there is a new and disturbing reality for students that society has become more conscious of and we as educators have to take account of in our teaching. The pressures of modern living are taking their toll on our youth. It is a regular occurrence, for example, to hear reports about mental health problems in young people, the increased tendency towards depression and self-harm, the rising rate of suicide.
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hat ’s your philosophy of teaching? What are the assumptions you work with and the aims that you consciously (and perhaps unconsciously) try to achieve in your teaching? One eloquent and pithy response to this question that has stayed with me is as follows:
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‘What’s my philosophy? That’s easy – Kids before content. In my classroom, I don't teach English. I teach students.’ This attitude to teaching underpins all good modern educational theory and practice. Although it is now almost commonplace as an insight it warrants repeating: education is not simply about imparting knowledge but about developing the whole person. As teachers we are dealing with young people and our responsibility is to help them be the best young people they can be – in mind, body and spirit.
In an essay that has become a modern educational classic, The Heart of a Teacher, Parker J Palmer speaks about the interplay between the subject we teach, the students in front of us and who we are in ourselves as people. These are the three vertices of the complex and exhilarating triangle that is education. I want to use Parker Palmer’s image by way of introducing this important teaching resource. The students we teach are always ‘larger than life’ and coming as they do from a myriad set of circumstances and with unique needs they challenge us professionally, emotionally and humanly.
Indeed, the psychological well-being of people – both young and old – has become a talking point in recent years. We now speak of ‘wellness’ as something that needs to be carefully nurtured and not to be presumed upon. Emotional well-being is a fragile and even an elusive state in a stress-filled age. ‘The best days of our lives’ are for many fraught with tensions and uncertainties – far from the facile images of charmed and carefree living. This being said, we should not see adolescence as a pathological state or youth as a perilous stage of life; rather it is a period during which the young person needs wise and sensitive support. The health of our students can be greatly supported by how we – as the significant adults in their school lives – understand the breadth and depth of what we are about; by seeing that our responsibility as teachers is not only for the academic development of the students but also for their personal and emotional wellbeing. It is often commented that one of the single greatest causes of adolescent depression is the fear of not belonging or feeling different. When adults can acknowledge the fragile reality of being human and speak about the internal strife that we all endure then these threatening and ‘disturbing’ feelings can
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This is an excellent resource. The 43 lessons are a combination of theory clearly and engagingly explained, wonderful anecdotes and quotations that illustrate the concepts presented
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The mental health of our young people will also depend on how well we equip them with an understanding of their own make-up and provide them with strategies to manage their emotions, relationships and attitudes to life. What this resource does is to invite students to recognise their own internal capacities and draw on the inner strength that we are all endowed with to meet the challenges of life. The approach adopted by the author is to say that the most intelligent thing we can do – the most rational – is to realise that our makeup is deeply emotional and needs the attention, care and management that a discerning mind can bring to it.
The author involves the students in a process of continuous reflection on his or her learning – inviting them to consider ‘What have I learned here’, ‘What can I use to help me manage better?’ The approach is always positive, enabling the student to be mindful of what is already working in their favour. In fact, one of the central themes running through the text is that an attitude of gratitude is not only the most appropriate response to our human condition and lives but actually it is also the sanest and the one most likely to make us happy. What the author has done is to bring the wisdom of psychology, the natural sciences, literature and spirituality to the area of well-being and to do so in a way that is fresh, relevant and accessible.
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In fact this turmoil is often the catalyst for personal growth and in developing that essential quality that enables us to relate properly with one another – i.e. empathy – that capacity to connect with somebody else in their difficulties and to help them cope with what they are going through.
and practical exercises for students to reflect on and discuss in class. The author also gives a wealth of techniques that can be worked on. The theory and reflection is complemented by the step by step ‘how-to’. Nothing works better than actually doing it.
The material and the issues covered in this resource should be regarded as relevant for all teachers charged with the important responsibility of educating the young.
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Foreword
be dealt with and understood. The cloud is lifted and the sun can break through.
Mr Brian Flannery Jesuit Delegate for Education
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Foreword
FOREWORD
by Jolanta Burke
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the good life. Researchers draw their knowledge from students who are happier than average. Based on these observations, they design activities and introduce them to other students to see if their well-being changes as a result of completing them. When an activity does, indeed, boost students' well-being, and shows similar results when it is retested with other groups of students, it is deemed validated. Positive psychology offers a choice of validated and evidenceinformed activities that are introduced to students in the form of a body-builder model.
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appiness, otherwise known as well-being, has become the most invaluable commodity in the western world. Our children have food on their plates, access to education and doctors, a roof over their heads, a lot of comfort they enjoy, various types of entertainment at their disposal as well as exposure to after-school activities enriching their lives furthermore.
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Yet, despite all these life quality improvements, our society is flooded with depression and anxiety amongst ever younger people. If you were to ask any parent what they want for their child, they might mention some of the life necessities, such as a good job, or life comforts, such as a beautiful home, but ultimately, parents say that what they want for their children is to be happy.
Happiness is undoubtedly the most sought after commodity, which is why many schools around the world have now begun teaching it. Positive education programmes have flourished in numerous countries around the world, such as Australia, the US and the UK. Educators are taught wellbeing, which they in turn introduce to students. In some instances, a wholeschool approach is applied, whereby all teachers are taught well-being and begin to incorporate it in their classes as part of the curriculum. In addition, parents learn what they can do to feel happier and help their offspring practise their new skill. Some programmes are based on a common-sense approach, others are evidence based or evidence informed, whereby the most up-to-date science of positive psychology applied in education is the foundation of the programme. Positive psychology is a field of psychology that scientifically examines
A body builder becomes fit by building each of their muscle groups individually. Similarly, a body-builder model of wellbeing assumes that if we keep building all aspects of the good life known to science, we will become ultimately happier. Those aspects include effective balancing of positive and negative emotions, enhancing student engagement, helping young people build relationships and identify their life purpose. It also includes such aspects as learning optimism, and perseverance to achieve what we hope in our lives. To date, the body-builder model is the most effective model applied in positive education. This model is also the basis of which this programme was created. It includes all that is necessary to help students live a good life. It delves into evidence-based approaches to enhance positive emotions, such as gratitude and acts of kindness. It also teaches young people about the growth mindset, which can protect them from mental illness, but most importantly allows them to develop more effectively and become more successful in life. The programme also assists students to identify and use their strengths, which are the basis for their well-being and self-esteem enhancement.
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www.jolantaburke.com
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Jolanta Burke, Dublin PhD Researcher, Trinity College. Jolanta is a psychologist specialising in positive psychology. She is a global representative of the International Network for Positive Education and has been recently acknowledged in the Irish Times as one of 30 people who make Ireland happier. For further information, go to
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Apart from being evidence based, what makes this programme particularly unique is that it is Irish. This is the first comprehensive positive
education programme embedded in the Irish culture. Young people are given examples of well-known Irish personalities, and situations from everyday life in Ireland to draw from. The programme is engaging and entertaining. But most importantly, it is based on solid science, teaching children skills as well as habits of cultivating life-long well-being. Let the well-being revolution in Irish education begin.
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Foreword
It introduces students to the concept of resilience and evidence-based ways to help young people feel mentally stronger in the face of adversity, not feel defeatist when in adverse situations, and bounce back after life challenges.
I wasn’t a talented player but I’m a
talented human being. 10
– Louis van Gaal
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INTRODUCTION
A lust for knowledge and a need for understanding are inscribed in the hearts of the best of men and women. As is the calling of the teacher. There is no craft more privileged than to awaken in another human being powers and dreams beyond your own. To induce in others a love for that which one loves. To make of one’s inward presence their outward future. This is a threshold adventure like no other. – Rudolf Steiner
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Introduction
INTRODUCTION
Context for delivering a well-being programme The emotional well-being of our students should be every bit as important to us as their physical well-being. A student who is supported emotionally is far more likely to learn more effectively, and develop the social/emotional ‘soft’ skills necessary to become a fully rounded, flourishing human being.
Unfortunately, such skills frequently get pushed aside by the relentless pursuit of curriculum content and happen by accident in schools, rather than by deliberate design. They are a random byproduct, not strategically planned for.
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The future is not what it was. The world is changing. Are we preparing our young people for a world that no longer exists? Are we preparing students for tests or for life?
is important, promoting the resilience and well-being of our young people must take centre stage. Self-efficacy has a clear and unambiguous claim for its introduction as a vital area of study in any contemporary curriculum.
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If we don’t inculcate the ‘soft skills’ and create a literacy around emotional intelligence, a term brought into common parlance by Dr. Daniel Goleman, we may end up with a generation in a fast-changing world that is unemployed, underemployed, or unemployable. The stakes are high. Indeed, they have never been higher. And yet, if we get education right, nothing has more power to redress inequality and illuminate the road to a successful, flourishing future.
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Our students will mostly forget what we made them think – they will never forget how we made them feel. I have been teaching 21 years and no student ever stopped me in the street and said, ‘Hey, Sir, that worksheet changed my life!’ and I spent ages on those worksheets!
Over and above educational attainment parents' number one priority is for their children to be happy. Happiness, it would seem, is the ultimate currency. This course has been designed to invite teachers and students, in a spirit of partnership, to reflect upon the core ingredients of well-being and a life lived to the flourishing full. It is hoped to present tools and techniques to put those ingredients to work in their day-to-day lives. If education is a conversation between one generation and another about what
If students learn appropriate coping skills, and learn to live well, they will successfully avoid some of the growing plethora of health problems blighting the western world: depression, heart disease, obesity, addiction and cancer, to name but a few. It is hoped this programme will empower and enable a student to take charge of his/ her life and learning instead of following the script of someone else and being led in a direction they would otherwise rather avoid.
Most conversations are simply monologues conducted in front of witnesses! – M. Miller
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Indeed the ‘science’ of happiness, of which more is added to the canon each year, would indicate that unhelpful patterns of thinking can not only be addressed, but reversed and replaced with more positive and productive patterns. To facilitate this, we can positively learn from the successful experience of others to help light the way and inspire our own futures.
The main academic foundation to the course is Authentic Happiness by Dr. Martin Seligman. One of the central tenets of this programme is that wellbeing is a skill, and can be, at least in part, discerned and successfully distilled from the successful lives of others. It is hoped that the references and case studies from a cross-section of people, both known and less familiar, will highlight four key pathways:
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Their likes and dislikes, beliefs and values, who they are, and their hopes and dreams for a flourishing future. In conjunction with this, finding out how they can further develop themselves, safeguarding and protecting their wellbeing – and the well-being of others. At its core, happiness is about fulfilling potential and flourishing, not dying with the music still left inside us.
expansion and proliferation in recent years. It draws heavily on the positive psychology movement and the work of its founder Dr. Martin Seligman, and the growing number of universities actively looking at the science of well-being such as Harvard.
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The central focus of the programme is to enable the student to get to know better the most important person in their lives – themselves.
1 Aligning with good people to help mentor us on our journey 2 Identifying our strengths and finding as many opportunities to use them as possible
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Introduction
Focus of the Ways to Well-Being Programme
The predominant theme of the work is the fundamental relationship with life itself. In order to be successful, we must engage with its component parts, which we have broken down into five areas of focus. The hope would be that a good relationship with these areas will promote positive self-regard and consequent well-being. These five core areas of relationships for young people are: 1
Life
2
Emotions
3
Mindset, meaning and purpose
4
Past, present and future
Personality, talent and performance. 5
These areas of focus are based on the growing body of scientific and psychological research into happiness and well-being that has seen a huge
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3
Caring for spirit, mind and body
4 Finding an appropriate equilibrium between comfort and challenge zones, between stretch and balance.
The predominant theme of the work is the relationship with life itself.
The lesson plans, stories, and accompanying notes are in no way designed to be prescriptive. Rather it is hoped that they will be seen organically, ready to be changed and moulded to take advantage of the creativity of both teacher and student. A lesson plan rarely survives contact with students – and nor should it perhaps. It will take root and shape in ways not intended, throwing up
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Resources
opportunities for discourse, and avenues for reflection and personal growth. It is said by the ancient Chinese that the quality of a culture can be judged by its willingness to plant trees under whose shade they will never sit. It is hoped that some of the lessons you teach will plant trees that in years hence will flourish and be at the service of a grateful student who will have due cause to raise a glass to you and utter two of the most powerful and underused words in the English language – ‘Thank You’.
of a diversity of segments from film and television. Please see appendix for list of possible films and music that may be used from a selection that I have tried and tested myself to positive reaction from students over the years. The stimulus it provides can often make a profound point in a powerful way.
The workbook is intended to be a document that charts the students' personal thoughts, opinions and beliefs at an important juncture in their lives. The students use these to reflect on and count their blessings, to record ideas from the reflective written tasks and hopefully motivate them to keep hold of the workbook when the course has ended. It is important to stress that not every exercise the student does will resonate and declare its relevance immediately. It is important that they have the capacity to return to these ideas at a later stage. As Steve Jobs said, we cannot join the dots going forward. It is only through looking back oftentimes that sense can be made, and indeed dots start to join. It will form a useful record of their development at a crucial stage on their lives' journey. Mark Twain could not get over how stupid his parents were when he was 14, and how much they had learned and how much wiser they had become when he had reached the age of 21!
The material is designed to be engaging, interactive, experiential and uses examples from within the students' framework of reference. Quite often, the students themselves will suggest equally pertinent examples, which fosters a spirit of collaboration and engagement. Indeed within my own practice, it became a challenge to show a relevant clip that was new to the students .Often this would facilitate a productive and useful discourse between teacher and student. It would be good practice to ‘screen test’ any recommendations from students in private, to ensure suitability, relevance and appropriate content.
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Accompanying this teacher resource pack is a student workbook. The workbook has been designed in such a way that a teacher may decide to follow it through or else dip in and out of and even build upon its contents. There are over 100 hours of teaching materials contained within the workbook.
In delivering the course, I make much use
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Introduction
Format of lessons
Evaluation
a reflection, observation, opening remarks by the teacher to lead into the exercise, setting the frame and context.
Awareness
asking the student to direct their attention and notice something about themselves or others.
Intervention
acts or actions to be carried out, pre, post or during the exercise.
What was the best piece of advice you were ever given? If you could have a superpower what would you choose and why? If a theme tune or song had to play every time you entered a room what would you choose? If you could go on a night out with a celebrity you think has a successful life who would you choose?
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The programme puts the student in the driving seat of their own learning and lives. The lesson typically will follow this structure:
If you could go anywhere in the world for a month all expenses paid where would you go?
It has been said that the typical class consists of twenty-five students turning up to watch a teacher working! This exercise communicates that the teacher is firmly in the role of guide on the side rather than sage on the stage, if comfortable doing so. The exercise can typically be started by the teacher themselves.
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Well-being is ultimately subjective and the activities that we choose to engage in to promote our own happiness have to have subjective value based on individual reasoning. The more prescriptive and dictatorial we become about well-being the more we undermine the validity of what we are doing.
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Introduction
Methodology
Reflection
what can be taken away from the experience, what can be learned from the lesson?
A typical well-being lesson begins with an observation-raising moment – something to bring the lesson topic to life for the students. This could be anything from a short video clip to a picture or even just a question, something to engage or piquÊ the interest and attention of the students in a way that will provoke discussion and the sharing of ideas and the asking of questions. A nice lead-in is to use the Native American tradition of a talking piece. The concept being that the person holding the talking piece has the right to speak and be listened to without interruption. When finished he passes it on to the next student.
Another idea is a student could be asked to rate his or her amount of energy on a scale of one to ten, followed by a simple question such as:
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I have used these questions with both young and mature students. It can be a useful lead-in for a number of reasons:
XXIt promotes the democratic
contribution of all students and encourages their active participation.
XXIt can raise a chuckle or two, and
promote a positive atmosphere to set the tone for the class.
XXIt also indicates that these are
very different lessons that require their active, rather than passive, participation, that everyone has a voice, and that every voice counts. Asking where they sit in terms of energy can prompt understanding that energy throughout the course of the day can fluctuate and is susceptible to variation, that it can be topped up by proper attention to nutrition, water intake and appropriate sleep.
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Interspersed throughout the workbook are items I call ‘ Things to make you go mmmm? ’Questions to make students think. Research indicates that very little time is spent by students talking in class – and much of that can fall into the ‘Can I go to the toilet? ’ variety. Wait time between question and answer can be as little as 0.8 of a second.
It is said that the All Blacks rugby team are taught in moments of high pressure to wiggle their toes. This simple act is designed to get them out of their heads and into the present moment at a crucial time. I have heard it said that there are three types of people in life: those that make things happen, those who watch things happen – and those that wake up and say, "What happened?"
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"What is the capital of France?" "Paris, Sir!"
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Half of the class are thinking to themselves, "What’s France?" It is good practice during the lessons to leave the students stuck, to encourage thinking time before soliciting an answer from the class. Once the students are on board with the topic, the awareness and sense of collegiality continues by enhancing their understanding of a particular aspect of being human. This may involve looking at our experiences (or perhaps looking at somebody else’s experiences and comparing them with our own). The lesson commences with an evaluation element, a reflection on some area of well-being, promoting a spitfire of critical inquiry, where students' attention is brought deliberately to some aspect of their lives or the world around them. This is followed by an awareness phase, being more aware of the present moment is a skill that takes time and patience in a frenetic and busy world. Constantly bombarded by extraneous ‘noise’ we jump from one thing to the next, noticing little along the way.
We then move into the ‘intervention’ part of the lesson, where the students learn a specific skill that might help them to maximise their well-being; for example, in the lessons on relationship with physical health, students learn techniques to help them sleep, advice on how to maximise learning or ways of managing stress. It is important that students have the opportunity to try the interventions out together and learn through experience. It is all too easy to just tell students 'If you want to achieve X, then do Y” but unless students have an opportunity to try these ideas out with guidance when needed, the interventions simply won't get used by them. The final section of the lesson, ‘Reflection’, is where we encourage the students to evaluate and reflect upon the intervention they have just learned, and they do this in between the lessons. All students are encouraged to complete short written exercises where they reflect upon the impact of having tried the intervention taught in the lesson. Students are encouraged to give status to their workbook and the thoughts contained, as it documents their learning journey. Feedback may be given by the teacher, but the work is not ‘marked’ per se. This element of the methodology is crucial, because it offers the students the opportunity to provide reasons why they accept or reject what they have learned.
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Introduction
Time allowing, a nice way to end the session is to again check and connect with the energy level of each student and ask for one ‘takeaway’ from the lesson, something that made them think or reflect or motivated them to make further inquiry.
Encouraging the students' awareness of the present moment in a spirit of gratitude, acceptance and appreciation is an important element of the programme. This creates an awareness of just how much of our time is taken up with a focus on the past or the future, to the detriment of the present moment – the only thing we have full control of.
I have used two apps available on tablets and smartphones, together with either a cheap Bluetooth speaker or overhead projector. The app I use most frequently is called Headspace and a quick search in the iTunes or android app store should locate it. An alternative is an app called Smiling Mind, which I also find very effective. Other apps and tools are available, they are all free and feedback from students and teachers is very positive. On planes we're frequently reminded during the safety message to put the oxygen mask on ourselves before anyone else – counterintuitive, or at least not our first instinct for many of us reaching out to protect our loved ones. The stress and seemingly relentless pressures that teaching can produce might make it useful to check and connect with our own well-being and stress levels. It can be powerful in helping gauge how a student might respond if it has been tried by yourself first.
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Recently there has been a significant amount of scientific interest in mindfulness. It is perhaps best known for the link between the practice of mindfulness and stress reduction (MBSR) or treating depression (MBCT), for which it has been shown to be particularly effective. Research over the last few years has also made a strong connection between mindfulness and happiness.
done at the start of the lesson through a scripted exercise. Examples can be read below. Alternatively the teacher may have their own versions.
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Mindfulness is an ancient practice which simply requires one to attend nonjudgementally to the present moment, rather than allowing one's mind to flit between past, present and future. There are many things that can be used as a focus for mindfulness, from the breath to walking, from sounds in the world around us to sensations in our body.
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Introduction
Mindfulness Meditation
Evidence would suggest that those who meditate regularly exhibit higher levels of activity in the left pre-frontal cortex of the brain, which is associated with positive emotion. There is also a proposed connection between mindfulness and creativity. Tal ben Shahar suggests that just three deep, well-taken breaths can start off a virtuous cycle of calm and begin to undo feelings of anxiety. It would be the view of this programme that incorporating mindfulness into the daily lives of our students, and indeed staff, would have beneficial consequences for learning outcomes, reduced stress and anxiety levels and overall well-being. Simple, short meditations form part of the well-being lessons. Operating from the maxim that the best time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining, mindfulness can be a very useful tool in preserving and protecting mental and physical health. Promoting relaxation with a purpose is a central tenet of the course, this can be
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Suggested Reading
XXThe Chimp Paradox Dr. Steve Peteres
XXSearch Inside Yourself Chang Meng Tan
XXComing to our Senses Jon Kabat-Zinn
XXBreathe through this – Mindfulness for Parents of Teenagers Eline Snel
XXThe Mindful Way Through Depression Mark Williams et al
Life is a journey, but don’t worry, you will find a parking spot at the end. Issac Asminov
When students use the ‘strike a pose’ technique to create an image, their peers can be encouraged to interpret the image, or ask questions that the posers may answer. Learners consolidate their understanding by choosing a way to physically represent a key idea they have discovered. A discussion can then ensue as the pose is interpreted by the class.
answers with another student, receive an answer from them which they did not have themselves and then move on to another student. They give, they get and they go on! The object is to try and get as many answers as possible. The teacher then asks students to return to their seats and then goes around the room asking each student to share one answer on their sheet. See if you can fill the board with your answers or go completely around the room without the same answer coming up!!
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This strategy can inject some goodspirited competition. Divide the class into groups of 4/5 or pairs. Give each student a sheet. Teams must race to add as much information to the sheet as they can about the topic they have been learning about, questioning and musing upon their ideas as they go. If you want to see who is contributing you could get students to use differentcoloured pens/markers.
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Carousel Rounders
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Introduction Lesson XX
question such as: How might the good qualities of a friend be represented? What was the main takeaway of the story?
In addition to this, you could have a second round where on your signal, students must leave their sheet and go in a clockwise direction to the next sheet, which the other students worked on. Once they have read what the other group have writ ten, they can now add, amend, respond or otherwise improve upon what they have seen. Eventually they will arrive back at their own sheet and be able to review the additions. All the while you can be circling around. This will provide you with vital feedback about what the learners do and do not know yet. Give, Get, Go
This is a good activity to get students to share their responses with other students, along with learning from each other. There are activities in the student workbook based on this approach. Following an introductory question, students are initially asked to write down their own answers. The teacher then invites the students to move around the classroom, where they share one of their
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The golfer Jack Nicklaus has said that he never took a shot before picturing it clearly in his mind’s eye first.
Some cause happiness wherever they go, others whenever they go.
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Oscar Wilde
OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH LIFE
Module 1
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MODULE 1
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LKNOWING E S S OME, N KNOWING 1 YOU
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Our Relationship with Life
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LTHEE TREE S S OOFNGREATNESS 2
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LINTRODUCING E S S O N THE3 CONCEPT OF STRESS
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LMINDFULNESS ESSON 4
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LANEATTITUDE S S O NOF 5GRATITUDE: COUNTING
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LFINDING ESSO N 6 THE HAPPINESS (H) FACTOR
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LLIVING E S SLIFE O WITH N 7A PURPOSE
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LWHAT E S ISVALUE O N THE8 MOST
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OUR BLESSINGS
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Our Relationship with Life
INTRODUCTION TO MODULE
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With that in mind, module one embarks on a journey of awareness and poses a challenge. We are wired to go beyond what we believe is natural to achieve. To go further than we thought possible. To run faster than we hoped, and to reach higher than we dreamed. Without those dreams that are explored in the Tree of Greatness exercise, there is no plan. Without a plan, there is no accomplishment. Without accomplishment no rewards or self-confidence, and without self-belief, less fulfilment. If we do not believe in ourselves we cannot believe in our future – and it is that very hope in the future that gives power to the present.
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Rather self-confidence in its most sustainable form is a gradual build. Pulling at the grass does not make it grow faster.
You cannot control the cards dealt, but you
can control how to play the hand. Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want. Brick walls are there to show you how much you want it, there to stop those who don’t want it enough. Randy Pausch
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Module 1
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hese opening lessons are intended to develop an understanding of who we are, and what we are about. So it is important that we start with a number of exercises that enable students to explore and reflect on certain aspects of their lives and aspects of themselves. Helping to build the self-confidence and self-esteem muscle takes time. We need to prime the pump of positivity, for as Jesse Jackson says, you can't plant the seed and pick the fruit the next morning.
Our Relationship with Life
1 The first few lessons of the course should be dedicated to the student unpacking their own story, their likes and dislikes. This self-knowledge can be built upon by the following exercise. This exercise will also flag for some the invisible power of limiting beliefs. If you ask a group of six year olds how many can draw, you will find a class full of eager hands reaching skywards automatically. Big, bold, colourful pictures will be the order of the day.
a young student, normally a bundle of nervous energy, quietly concentrating on a drawing, at the back of a class.
Conversely, if you ask a group of eleven year olds who can draw, out of thirty, you will get scarcely ten hands. If you ask fourteen year olds you might not get any. Ken Robinson tells the story of
“But nobody knows what God looks like!” the teacher gently admonished the child.
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Learning Outcome:
“What are you drawing, Lisa?” enquired the teacher, curious as to the reason for such prolonged silence.
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Without looking up and breaking her concentration, the student replied, “I am drawing God,” in a tone of voice that was definitive and matter of fact.
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Lesson 1
KNOWING ME, KNOWING YOU
“They will in a minute!” replied the student.
Students will understand the importance of self-reflection. To help the student notice that they can change behaviour in the light of their growing awareness of how self-image can affect everyday choices.
Evaluation
The exercises allow students to reflect upon aspects of their lives. The course depends on the student developing a sense of who they are.
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Awareness The student is invited to notice three things that they are grateful for.
Lesson 1
Intervention XXAllow students some time to fill in each box. XXOn completion they can be invited to share some of their answers with the person beside them.
XXAlternatively, each student can be allowed to share one thing they wrote for each question.
XXThe teacher may allow a student to pass on an answer.
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Reflection
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XXInvite students to write down three things that they will take from the exercise. XXDid anything surprise them?
XXDid they find any particular question difficult to answer?
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XXWhat was the easiest question to answer?
Ancillary activities in Workbook
XXLifelines – activity for students to chart highs and lows of their lives to date XXWho packed your parachute – a story with accompanying activity where students explore who helped and supported them at various stages throughout their lives. Reference can also be made to the fact that support can come in different forms. It can include emotional, physical, mental and spiritual supports.
XXInvite students to reference as many of these supports as they can think of in the spaces provided on page 11 of the workbook.
Encourage the student not to rush, rather to feel and see each step of the process thoroughly.
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Our Relationship with Life
2 In the exercise on page 14, the students are asked to draw a tree in the blank space provided in the workbook. The only caveat is that it must have the following components: Roots — What nourishes and sustains them? What gives them energy and firm foundations?
Flowers — This speaks to accomplishments, moments that the student is proud of.
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Trunk — The student can be asked on a scale of 1-10 how solid they feel. This speaks to resilience, to the fact that from time to time they will all be buffeted by the winds of challenges that life will throw at them. The trunks of trees come in all shapes and sizes.
in front of the dragons looking for investment in their business – i.e. themselves – what would make them stand out from the crowd? This speaks to talents and gifts that sometimes students don’t see as such, or that they don't even know they have. Some students reveal their skills at deconstructing bicycles or computers or a myriad of hidden talents.
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Lesson 2
THE TREE OF GREATNESS
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Branches — Who do they hang out with and hang on to, in good times and in bad? The students are invited to write these names on the tree. Leaves — What makes them who they are? Every person is a oneoff, unique, never to be repeated event. To use the business term, what is their Unique Selling Point (USP)? If competing in the television show 'The Dragons Den' and they were standing
Buds — This details hopes, dreams and ambitions for the future. Some takeaways to encourage from the lesson debrief:
XXWe must feed the roots of the tree, Miracle Grow won't work.
XXWe control our behaviours with our thoughts.
XXTo perform well we must feel good. XXOne's attitude to life is very important.
Learning Outcome: Students will develop an appreciation of the power of being positive and an understanding of the importance of supporting and sustaining our hopes and dreams from ‘the root to the fruit’ in order to achieve them.
Evaluation The students are first asked to consider whether there is such a thing as a ‘self-made’ successful person. We all need support systems and can call upon strengths and gifts that sometimes are hidden below the surface.
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Awareness Students are asked to bring their awareness now to their own lives and notice all the people who help them in whatever way, big or small. Leaves
Lesson 2
represent the talents and gifts of the individual - the things that make you stand out from the crowd.
Branches Who we hang out with and hang on to.
Buds
represent hopes, dreams and ambitions for the future.
Trunk
represents our strength in times of challenge. How strong is yours on a scale of 1-10?
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Flowers
represent our accomplishments and moments we are proud of.
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Roots
though not visible represent the sources of our strength and energy.
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Intervention
XXRead the poem ‘Good Timber’ by Douglas Malloch on page 11 of the workbook.
What message is the poem trying to convey? What are the ‘strong winds’ doing for the tree that is positive? Can something good come out of difficult circumstances and trying times?
XXAsk the students how many can draw. Proceed to draw a very basic tree on the board.
XXPoint out the quotation from Henry Ford – “If we believe we can, we are right, if we believe we can’t, we are also right.”
XXInvite them to have a go – the tree does not have to be a work of art, but it must have the components we outlined above.
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XXAsk them to try and make
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it as comprehensive as possible – point their attention to the tree of greatness picture in the workbook.
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Reflection XXWhen completed, students can be invited in pairs or small groups to unpack and walk the other students through their tree.
Lesson 2
XXHow many of the trees look the exact same? XXInvite them to revisit the exercise that evening and add to the buds or flowers or leaves.
XXWhat can help turn buds into flowers? XXAsk students to write down three things that they will take from today's exercise.
Relationship with life:
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As part of your mindfulness activities with the students try out the Mental Rehearsal activity as outlined on page 14. Ancillary activities in Workbook
XXRead and reflect on the story about Steve Cunningham on page 15 of the
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workbook. Follow-up question – how has Steve used his strengths, gifts and determination to overcome the obstacles that he has faced in his life? What can you learn from his attitude?
"The path to true success is in your mind and not your ability or environment. – Steve Cunningham
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Reflection XXAsk students to reflect on the next time they feel an emotion strongly. How do they experience it? Where in the body do they experience it?
XXWhat did they learn from the experience that was positive? XXAs mentioned earlier, Mother Teresa famously used her anger and righteous indignation about poverty as fuel to make a difference for good. How can students harness their emotions for the better?
Ancillary Activity:
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Ask students when they have completed question two to draw the emoji (if you don’t know what that is ask your teenage son or daughter ... or any teenager near!) that best fits what she is feeling now. Identify the six key emotions and write them in the circles beside the people on page 51.
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Complete takeaway section.
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Lesson 10
Read the Biscuits Story on page 50 of the workbook and invite students to answer the questions.
Relationship with Emotions
11 CHANNELING EMOTIONS
Learning Outcome:
Learning to manage or channel our emotions is about harnessing their energy, redirecting it to bring about positive consequences rather than surrendering to them and acting foolishly.
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It is important to know how to use the six basic human emotions, to achieve your own success! Rather than letting these feelings control you, or hold you back, you can choose to turn them to
your advantage. Trying to deny them, or push them aside, can be a losing struggle. Instead, you should recognise that these are powerful forces, which you can use to further your dreams. When taken in this way, emotions can be your secret weapon for realising the success which you’ve always imagined.
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Lesson 11
Emotions are very powerful and play quite a large role in our decision-making process. The part of our brain which controls our emotions is actually six times more powerful than the thinking rational part of the brain and gets messages first. Therefore we need to learn not so much to control our emotions, rather to manage them effectively.
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Students develop an awareness of the importance of managing their emotions effectively.
Evaluation
When faced with situations that make us angry, we can handle them by choosing a bad way, a good way, or a best way. What are positive ways to channel anger? Can how we respond to anger have an impact on those around us?
Awareness
Start the class with five minutes of mindfulness. Students write down something that has happened to them since the last session that they are grateful for. Ask the students to consider how they respond to situations which may anger them.
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GLOSSARY OF TERMS
Simple Definitions An Affirmation is a positive statement about yourself which you repeat to yourself for as long as it takes for you to think, believe and act in that way. Appreciation is the recognition and enjoyment of the good qualities of someone or something; a full understanding of a situation. A Belief is a feeling of certainty that something exists, is true, or is good e.g. religious, political or self-beliefs.
Empathy is the ability to share another person's feelings and emotions as if they were your own. Empower means to give someone the means to achieve something, for example to become stronger or more successful.
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A limiting belief is a feeling of certainty about something which holds you back or restricts you from taking action in favour of yourself.
Emotional resilience simply refers to one's ability to adapt to stressful situations or crises. More resilient people are able to “roll with the punches” and adapt to adversity without lasting difficulties, while less resilient people have a harder time with stress and life changes.
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Feeling(s) is a way of thinking and reacting to things which is emotional and unplanned rather than logical and practical. Your feelings about something are the things that you think and feel about it, or your attitude towards it.
Character is the mental, moral and behavioural qualities distinctive to an individual.
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The Conscious mind is the part of your mind that is responsible for logic and reasoning. The conscious mind also controls all the actions that you do intentionally while being conscious. For example, when you decide to make any voluntary action like moving your hand or leg it is done by the conscious mind.
Efficacy is the ability to produce a desired or intended result. Self-efficacy is one's belief in one's ability to succeed in specific situations or accomplish a task. One's sense of self-efficacy can play a major role in how one approaches goals, tasks, and challenges. Ego is the part of you that defines you; part of your conscious mind, the part of your identify that you consider your ‘self’. The ego most immediately controls thought and behaviour and mediates between the person and external reality.
Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention on the present. When you're mindful, you observe your thoughts and feelings from a distance, without judging them good or bad. Instead of letting your life pass you by, mindfulness means living in the moment and awakening to experience. Mindset is a particular way of thinking: a person's attitude or set of opinions about something. Mindset is a simple idea discovered by world-renowned Stanford University psychologist Carol Dweck. In a fixed mindset, people believe their basic qualities, like their intelligence or talent, are simply fixed traits. They also believe that talent alone creates success - without effort.
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Appendices
Depression is a mental state in which you are sad and feel that you cannot enjoy anything, because your situation is so difficult and unpleasant.
Mental Health is a state of well-being in which every individual realises his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community.
In a growth mindset, people believe that their most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work - brains and talent are just the starting point. This view creates a love of learning and a resilience that is essential for great accomplishment. Personality is made up of the characteristic patterns of thoughts, feelings and behaviours that make a person unique. In addition to this, personality arises from within the individual and remains fairly consistent throughout life. Relationship is the way in which things or people are connected and/ or feel and behave towards each other.
overall sense of self-worth or personal value. Self-esteem is often seen as a personality trait, which means that it tends to be stable and enduring. Selfesteem can involve a variety of beliefs about the self, such as the appraisal of one's own appearance, beliefs, emotions, and behaviours. Subconscious Mind The subconscious mind is the part of your mind responsible for all of your involuntary actions. Your breathing rate and heart beat are controlled by your subconscious mind. Your emotions are controlled by your subconscious mind and it is also the place where your beliefs and memories are stored.
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Self-esteem describes a person's
You cannot learn to skate without being ridiculous ... The ice of life is slippery. – G.B. Shaw
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INSPIRING FUTURES