FREE | AUGUST 19 – 26 / 2021 Volume 55 | Number 2792
HOUSING SLOWDOWN
THE
Market takes a breather
GAMBLER
NICHOLAS URQUHART On conducting and teaching
Risk-loving Liberal Leader Justin Trudeau just might have put his career on the line by calling a snap summer election
MAI TAIS
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VANCOUVER GRANVILLE
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STUDIO 58
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FREE GUY
NEWS
Pit bull’s owner not liable after pet attacks a sheltie
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CONTENTS 6
2
THE GEORGIA STR AIGHT
COVER
Justin Trudeau has been a risk taker ever since entering federal politics in 2008, but this summer’s election just might be the biggest gamble of his career.
by Carlito Pablo
ancouverite Brandon Mills owns a Staffordshire mix, a type of pitbull. His dog attacked another dog, a Shetland sheepdog, or sheltie, owned by Carol Rowe. Rowe wanted Mills to pay $2,734.23 as reimbursement for her veterinary expenses. Mills acknowledged that his dog attacked Rowe’s pet but did not agree that he was liable for the incident. The dispute came before a B.C. Civil Resolution Tribunal, which eventually dismissed Rowe’s claim for reimbursement. In written reasons for decision, CRT member David Jiang recounted the undisputed facts. On the evening of November 1, 2020, Rowe’s family member, identified only by the initials CR, took her dog outside for a walk. Mills’s roommate, identified by the initials CF, took the man’s two dogs outside for a walk as well. The two dogs were the Staffordshire mix and a Chihuahua. “All dogs were leashed,” Jiang noted. The two dog walkers encountered each other. CF stopped and warned CR to keep their distance. The dogs and their walkers were on the sidewalk at the time. CR then decided to walk around CF and the two dogs by going on the adjacent grass. “As CR approached,” Jiang wrote, “Mr. Mills’ Staffordshire mix attacked the sheltie, dragging CF forward across the grass.” CF picked up the Chihuahua and then tried to help CR free the sheltie from the other dog. “The Staffordshire mix eventually let go and CR carried the sheltie away,” Jiang wrote. Rowe immediately sought veterinary treatment for her injured sheltie. “Veterinarian records show they diagnosed the sheltie with soft tissue injuries to its head and neck as well as a traumatic brain injury,” Jiang said. A Vancouver municipal officer informed Mills on November 30, 2020, that investigation showed that there was “insufficient evidence to suggest Mr. Mills’ Staffordshire mix was at fault”. “In December 2020 a neurologist noted the sheltie’s condition had improved somewhat,” Jiang noted. Jiang wrote that Mills does not deny Rowe’s submission that his Staffordshire mix is a type of pit bull. “Some B.C. municipalities make specific restrictions about pit bulls in their bylaws. Vancouver, where the attack occurred, is not one of them,” Jiang pointed out. He also wrote that case law “suggests that a dog’s breed, by itself, does not establish that it had a propensity for aggression”.
August 19-26 / 2021
By Charlie Smith Cover photo by Adam Scotti/PMO
4
REAL ESTATE
The Canadian Real Estate Association has reported an “extremely unbalanced” market in the midst of a low supply of homes. By Carlito Pablo
8
LIQUOR
Although there is some dispute as to when it is National Mai Tai Day, there is no questioning that the tiki cocktail has a fascinating history. By Mike Usinger
Shetland sheepdogs are known for their gentle temperament. Photo by YanJF/Getty Images.
In deciding the dispute, Jiang determined that Mills was not liable under any of the following three grounds: occupier’s liability, the legal doctrine of “scienter” (intent or knowledge of wrongdoing), and negligence. The attacked happened near a church, so occupier’s liability does not apply. As for scienter, that is “proven when the respondent is the dog’s owner, the dog had shown a propensity to cause the type of harm at issue, and the owner knew of that propensity”. “CF wrote in their statement the Staffordshire mix had ‘never hurt anyone or anything’ and it was ‘a very sweet, loving, gentle dog’,” Jiang wrote. Mills submitted that his Staffordshire mix had “never once shown any aggression towards people or other animals”. “Ultimately, I find it significant that no one said the Staffordshire mix previously attacked or attempted to attack another person or another dog,” Jiang stated. As for negligence, the CRT member did not give weight to Rowe’s allegation that Mills “breached the standard of care by relying on CF to walk the Staffordshire mix”. Rowe claimed that Mills should have known that CF could not control the dog “I note that CR wrote in his statement that the Staffordshire mix was 80 pounds, CF was not much larger at 105 pounds, and CF was walking 2 dogs at the time,” Jiang noted. However, Jiang said that these are not sufficient to prove Mills was negligent. “There is no indication that CF had any prior difficulty walking the dogs,” Jiang stated. Jiang also said that Mills’s two dogs were leashed and that the Staffordshire mix did not escape. “The dog attack was also caused, in part, by CR approaching CF despite CF’s warning. I find Mr. Mills could not have reasonably anticipated this,” Jiang stated. “Given these circumstances, I also do not find it clear that a larger dog handler could have prevented the attack.” g
AUGUST 19 – 26 / 2021
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EDITOR Charlie Smith GENERAL MANAGER (ACTING) Sandra Oswald SECTION EDITORS Mike Usinger (ESports/Liquor/Music) Steve Newton SENIOR EDITOR Martin Dunphy STAFF WRITERS Carlito Pablo (Real Estate) Craig Takeuchi SOLUTIONS ARCHITECT Jeff Li ART DEPARTMENT MANAGER Janet McDonald
Here’s what people are reading this week on Straight.com.
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COVID-19 in B.C.: Almost 1,500 new cases and more than 5,000 active cases. VPD says man’s throat was slashed by stranger in Mount Pleasant. Trans Am Totem removed from northeast False Creek neighbourhood. B.C. wildfires create terror for motorists driving along Coquihalla Highway. Hells Angels’ legal bills and disbursements top $3.3 million in clubhouse battle. @GeorgiaStraight
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THE GEORGIA STR AIGHT
3
REAL ESTATE
Unbalanced housing markets feature low supply
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by Carlito Pablo
ome sales across the country have dropped 28 percent since the market peaked in March 2021. Although the Canadian Real Estate Association probably wouldn’t be surprised if media outlets lead their latest stories with this “moderation of sales activity”, the organization believes there’s a more important thing happening in the market. “It’s record-low inventories that should be our focus,” CREA chair Cliff Stevenson said in a report Monday (August 16). The report covers market activity in July 2021, which saw a 3.5 percent month-overmonth decline in sales from June. Last month’s sales also marked an annual decrease of 15.2 percent from July 2020.
However, Stevenson said that these are “unprecedented and challenging times”. “We still have extremely unbalanced housing markets all over the country,” Stevenson said. In more detail, the number of newly listed homes dropped by 8.8 percent in July compared to June. The declines were “led by a who’s who of big Canadian markets”, which means the Greater Toronto Area, Montreal, Vancouver, and Calgary. “Across the country, new supply was down in about three-quarters of all markets in July,” the CREA report stated. Moreover, the decline in new listings was “enough to noticeably tighten the sales-to-new-listings ratio despite sales acListed as a “bespoke Parisian chateau”, this Vancouver home in Shaughnessy (at 1609 Cedar Crescent) sold last month for $7,280,000 after almost three months on the depleted market.
Take what you want when you want it
tivity also slowing on the month”. CREA noted that the national sales-tonew-listings ratio was 74 percent in July 2021, up from 69.9 percent in June. For context, the association noted that the long-term average for the national salesto-new-listings ratio is 54.7 percent. “Based on a comparison of salesto-new-listings ratio with long-term averages, the tightening of market conditions in July tipped a small majority of local markets back into seller’s market territory, reversing the trend of more balanced markets seen in June,” the CREA report stated. The association also noted there was 2.3 months’ worth of supply of homes for sale at the end of July 2021. “This is extremely low—still indicative of
a strong seller’s market at the national level and in most local markets,” CREA reported. The associated added: “The long-term average for this measure is twice where it stands today.” Meanwhile, the home price index rose 0.6 percent month over month in July 2021 and marked a 22.2 percent increase year over year. In the report, CREA senior economist Shaun Cathcart said that the slowdown in sales has “not been surprising, given that the level of activity we were seeing back in March was unsustainable”. However, Cathcart noted that things are “not returning to normal”. “The problem of high housing demand amid low supply has not gone anywhere— it’s arguably worse,” Cathcart stated. g
Low-priced DEAL
The 415-square-foot condo was picked up at its listed price of $275,000 nine days after it went on the market, on August 3. The property is leasehold, and the lease has been prepaid until 2073.
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4
THE GEORGIA STR AIGHT
AUGUST 19 – 26 / 2021
d LET’S SET ASIDE the downtown parking stalls and the thin vacant lot in Grandview-Woodland. Let’s also not include that leaky condo development on East Broadway, as well as hotel ownerships where one can use their property for only a limited time. After doing that, an August 12, 2021, sale in the West End will probably end up as one of the lowest-priced residential deals for 2021. And so far, the studio unit at 206–1330 Harwood Street makes for the lowest in Vancouver this summer.
The Westsea Towers apartment unit comes with one parking space and storage. Building amenities include an outdoor swimming pool. Based on Zealty.ca tracking, two other prepaid leasehold properties in Vancouver sold for $275,000 this year. One was 205– 36 East 14th Avenue, in the Mount Pleasant neighbourhood. The one-bedroom unit is part of the Rosemont Manor building and the sale was made on January 15, 2021. The other was 1207–1075 Comox Street, with the deal being done on January 14 this year.
by Carlito Pablo
POLITICS
Liberal with no arms, no legs takes on NDP giant by Carlito Pablo
“Those are knowledge and courage. Knowledge means that I will be looking at issues as deeply as I can. I love to look at them from all angles and learn about their history and their potential solutions and futures,” he said. “And I’m not afraid to do things differently. So by using knowledge, it goes into courage. And I promise voters that I will fight every day to stay rooted in knowledge and courage,” the Liberal candidate continued. Vander Vies was featured in the 2011 documentary Josh by filmmaker Angelina Cantada. He recalled in the film that he was lucky that his parents treated him like a normal child destined for success. “They were just thrilled that I was finally living
my dream,” Vander Vies told the Straight when asked what they had to say about his entry into politics. In the documentary, Vander Vies also shared an important lesson he learned in life. “What I’ve learned is that having the ability to create your own opportunity, that’s really what living is,” he said. With polls suggesting that Trudeau and his Liberals are on their way to a third term, Vander Vies said in the interview that voters in his riding have an opportunity with the September 20 election. “The choice that Vancouver East has is [to] continue with someone who’s not in government or to have the chance of actually being at the table,” Vander Vies said. g
Vancouver East NDP candidate Jenny Kwan has won eight elections at local, provincial, and federal levels, but she has never faced an opponent who triumphed over adversity like Josh Vander Vies.
J
osh Vander Vies embodies a triumph of the human spirit. “Being born without arms and legs really could have shattered my life,” the Vancouver man says in a documentary. It didn’t. He became a lawyer, an international athlete with Canada’s paralympic team, motivational speaker, artist, husband, and parent. “I’ve lived a lot of my dreams already,” Vander Vies told the Straight in an August 17 phone interview. As a young boy growing up in Sarnia, Ontario, he also dreamed of becoming an MP someday. He has a chance to make that wish come true in the September 20 election. Vander Vies is running as the Liberal candidate in Vancouver East in the snap election called by Prime Minister Justin Trudeau on August 15. “Here I am, Day Three of the election, and I could tell you, it’s pretty fun to be living in another one of my dreams,” he said. “It’s intense. I’m scared; I’m terrified. But I’m really loving it,” the candidate added. Vander Vies is used to setting high goals for himself, and the electoral contest he has entered is another example: New Democrats have won almost all elections in Vancouver East. Liberals have taken the riding only twice in recent memory. One was in 1975, and the second was in 1993. Libby Davies, a popular New Democrat, held Vancouver East from 1997 to 2015. Vander Vies recalled that Davies was one of his “political heroes” when he was taking his double degree in political science and French language at Western University in Ontario.
“I was galvanized by her incredible leadership that she was showing with Insite and facing down [then–Conservative prime minister] Stephen Harper when he was proroguing Parliament. I mean, I have always loved Libby Davies,” he said. Vander Vies said that he moved to Vancouver about 13 years ago and settled in Vancouver East for the past six years. “I had no idea that I would live in her riding, let alone be a candidate,” he said. The UBC-trained lawyer lives with his wife, Dalia, their daughter, Olivia, and Dalia’s son, Karolis. As an aspiring MP, Vander Vies said that he aims to “rekindle the representation that Libby Davies brought to Vancouver East”. To do that, Vander Vies has to overcome Davies’s successor, the NDP’s Jenny Kwan. Kwan has never lost an election since her first foray into politics in 1993. She was a Vancouver city councillor and is a former provincial MLA and cabinet minister. She handily won Vancouver East in 2015 and 2019. In January 2021, New Democrats in the riding renominated her for a third term. “It’s a privilege to represent the people of Vancouver East and to make their voices heard in Ottawa,” Kwan said in a news release at the time. Vander Vies acknowledged that he is in for a “tough battle”. “I see the polls and I see the history. I’m not so sure that it’s an NDP stronghold. My analysis is that this is a Libby Davies stronghold. And Jenny Kwan is no Libby Davies,” he said. Vander Vies said that what he can promise to voters is that he will stick to “two central values”.
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THE GEORGIA STR AIGHT
5
POLITICS
Risk-loving Justin Trudeau puts career on the line
B
by Charlie Smith
ack in 2015, video-game producer Sean Smillie shared a story with CBC News about his longtime friend, Justin Trudeau. According to Smillie, Trudeau was “one of the most dangerous people in the world to snowboard behind” when he visited Whistler in the 1990s. That was because of Trudeau’s love of speed and sharp corners. He was a daredevil. Trudeau’s propensity for risk-taking has been on display on many other occasions since entering federal politics in 2008. Rather than choosing a safe seat, he ran and narrowly won in the largely French-speaking Montreal-area riding of Papineau, which had been held by the Bloc Québécois since 2006. In 2011, Trudeau burst into the national
political spotlight by doing something quite reckless. He accused a Conservative cabinet minister of being a “piece of shit” during a debate over a climate agreement in the House of Commons. Trudeau quickly apologized for his unparliamentary language. The next year, Trudeau took another risk by deciding to participate in a charity boxing match with a Conservative senator, Patrick Brazeau. Trudeau clobbered the Conservative, generating international media attention and plenty of praise from national political commentators. This summer, Trudeau may have taken his greatest political risk: calling an unnecessary election as COVID-19 case counts are rising and B.C. wildfires are burning
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THE GEORGIA STR AIGHT
AUGUST 19 – 26 / 2021
Liberal Leader Justin Trudeau loves taking chances, which has been demonstrated in a charity boxing match, his snowboarding history, and his August election call. Photo by Adam Scotti/PMO.
out of control. In his first news conference of the 2021 election campaign, Trudeau was repeatedly asked if he would resign if the Liberals didn’t win a majority. Although he easily sidestepped the reporters’ questions, he must realize that if there’s another Liberal minority government, his political career could be in jeopardy. That’s because there are Liberals who might be very appealing alternatives to centre-left voters fed up with Trudeau. Deputy prime minister Chrystia Freeland, former Bank of Canada and Bank of England governor Mark Carney, and former industry minister Navdeep Bains could all mount very credible challenges if they chose to do so. While it may appear that Trudeau already has the election in the bag, things can go awry during campaigns. An international crisis, unforeseen scandal, or political misstep have derailed incumbent prime ministers in the past. Just ask Stephen Harper about the impact of a photo of a three-yearold Syrian boy, Alan Kurdi, face-down and dead on a Mediterranean beach in 2015. Or talk to Paul Martin about the effect of the RCMP disclosing a criminal investigation into a finance-department leak in the midst of the 2006 campaign. In 1993, Kim Campbell told Canadians that election campaigns are not a time to discuss serious issues, which was a devastating blunder. The biggest threat to Trudeau might be if his traditional supporters conclude that if he is held to a minority, they’ll get a better Liberal leader in the future. And to achieve this, they may decide in this election to vote for the NDP, Green, or even Conservative candidate in their riding. Amir Attaran, a University of Ottawa professor of law and medicine, has noted on
Twitter that there are “real superstars” within the Liberal caucus. “I know many of them,” he stated. “But until they cast off their insubstantial, narcissistic, unctuous husk of a leader, it is with apology to those men and women that I urge voting for anyone but Liberal.” To rub it in, Attaran also tweeted: “It is necessary to dethrone Trudeau, and it is also easy, because he cannot survive a second minority government. Accordingly my desire is this: no Liberal majority. Also this: a more progressive Parliament, for science, fighting poverty, and climate change.” In the meantime, Trudeau already has a problem with his personal-approval rating. According to the Angus Reid Institute, it dropped below 40 percent this month. Although that may not be enough to defeat him, it’s not going to engender complacency within Liberal ranks. MOST CANADIANS don’t think of Trudeau as a gambler. But he demonstrated this side of his personality in 2012 when he refused to tell his interim leader, Bob Rae, if he would be seeking the federal Liberal leadership. Rae, a widely admired elder statesman in the party, had to decide if he would seek the permanent job—knowing that he might face a challenge from Trudeau—or if should he step down. Rae chose the latter, clearing the way for Trudeau to become federal leader in 2013 at the age of 42. Trudeau’s risk paid off. Trudeau took another political gamble by anointing rookies to run in the 2015 federal election rather than holding competitive nominations in many winnable ridings, including North Vancouver, Vancouver Granville, and Vancouver South. That paid off handsomely when future see next page
POLITICS
Vancouver Granville voters will choose a new MP
I
by Charlie Smith
n most federal elections, the vast majority of incumbents are reelected. For evidence of that, look no further than what happened in Vancouver in 2019. All six MPs cruised to victory, including Jody Wilson-Raybould, who had bailed on her party to run as an independent. Unless there’s a political earthquake on the horizon, it’s pretty safe to bet on all five incumbents seeking reelection this time in Vancouver. It’s conceivable that any of them could be defeated, of course. But given the demographics and income levels in their ridings, the federal polling numbers, and their relatively high public profiles, it’s not looking likely right now. In the looming federal election, the only riding in the city without an incumbent is Vancouver Granville, where Liberal Taleeb Noormohamed has a decent chance to make it to Parliament in his third attempt. Noormohamed is a West Vancouver– raised tech entrepreneur with degrees from Princeton and Harvard and an admirable record of community service. He was defeated in 2019 in Vancouver Granville and came second as the Liberal candidate in North Vancouver in 2011. As the Straight went to the printer on August 17, Noormohamed was about to find out who his NDP opponent will be. Antiracismeducation activist Markiel Simpson was competing for the NDP nomination with climate-justice campaigner Anjali Appadurai. The Conservative candidate is corporate lawyer Kailin Che. She attended schools in the riding and worked for Conservative cabinet ministers when Stephen Harper was prime minister. Imtiaz Popat, a cofounder of the Coalition
Kailin Che, the third Conservative to run in three elections in Vancouver Granville, hopes to woo enough of Jody Wilson-Raybould’s former voters to deny a victory to Liberal Taleeb Noormohamed.
It’s been a year of wicked forest fires and an even more deadly heat dome. – Charlie Smith
Against Bigotry–Pacific, has announced that he will be seeking the Green nomination this year. The People’s Party of Canada candidate is self-described Canadian patriot Damian Jewett. This time around, don’t expect the NDP to allocate huge amounts of money to this relatively wealthy riding. That’s because the party needs all the cash it can generate to protect incumbents across B.C. and compete
cabinet ministers Jonathan Wilkinson, Jody Wilson-Raybould, and Harjit Sajjan were all easily elected. Trudeau took another chance by mostly filling his first cabinet with rookies, leaving some caucus veterans on the backbenches. In 2019, Trudeau took yet another political risk by demoting Wilson-Raybould from justice minister to minister of veterans’ affairs. This came after she refused to go along with yet another Trudeau gamble: trying to engineer a deal to sideline the prosecution of SNC-Lavalin on corruption charges, even though this was adamantly opposed by the independent Public Prosecution Service of Canada. Trudeau hasn’t been immune to taking financial risks with the public treasury, either. In 2018, his government paid US$4.5 billion to Kinder Morgan to buy its Trans Mountain pipeline system, despite his oft-stated concerns about the climate crisis. Then he proceeded with a costly pipeline-expansion plan that has soared to $12.6 billion. But that was chump change in comparison to what Trudeau was prepared to spend in response to the pandemic. By 2024, the federal debt is expected to reach $1.4 trillion, thanks in part to the Canada Emergency Response Benefit, a federal wage subsidy, and other economic-stimulus programs. Trudeau risked his career by participating in a cabinet decision to
in more winnable parts of the region. The Conservatives used to win seats in Vancouver, but since 1993 only one has been elected. Wai Young captured Vancouver South in 2011 when the Conservatives obtained their only majority under Stephen Harper. One obstacle facing federal Conservative candidates in Vancouver is their lack of name recognition. Even though Che may appear to have solid credentials on paper, very few voters know her name. But if the NDP can siphon off enough Liberal votes and if Che can rally lots of former Wilson-Raybould voters to her camp, she will have a chance. She’ll also need the national Conservative campaign to catch fire with the electorate. On July 25, 2020, Che appeared on a radio program calling for mandatory maskwearing in B.C. She did this in her capacity as a lawyer, representing a doctor seeking an injunction to force the B.C. government to mandate masks in indoor spaces. The fact that Che was publicly calling
award a $900-million student-grant program to WE Charity, which has close ties to Trudeau’s wife, mother, and brother. Trudeau has lived most of his life in the spotlight—and both his mother and father each took their own risks in life. Margaret Trudeau partied with the Rolling Stones when her husband was prime minister. Pierre Trudeau went on long canoe treks in the wilderness. And just try to imagine what it must have been like growing up as the son of the former Canadian prime minister. He would have heard scores of people telling him how the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms changed their lives. He would have met Ismaili Muslims, Chilean Canadians, and people of many other cultural and religious backgrounds telling him how grateful they were that his father enabled them to come to Canada to build a new life. Scholars would have told him that his dad was brilliant. Gays and lesbians would have praised his father for saying that the state had no place in the bedrooms of the nation. And on his father’s death, he would have witnessed 60,000 people visiting Parliament Hill to view his casket. That’s a lot to take in for a young man trying to carve out his own identity in the world. Even in ordinary families, the shadow of the father can be overwhelming.
for mandatory masks, even if it was simply reflecting the views of her client, will serve her well on the doorsteps of the riding when she meets voters who are freaked out about COVID-19. She can immediately dispel notions that she’s a right-wing, kooky COVID denier. But if this summer’s climate reckoning turns voters away from both the Conservatives and the Liberals, then the NDP might have an outside chance. Keep in mind that the national vote is likely to occur around the time that hurricanes traditionally wallop the U.S. If Florida or Texas or Louisiana are being battered in the same week as the election, this will drive home the need for stronger action. It’s been a year of wicked forest fires and an even more deadly heat dome. That cost the lives of hundreds of British Columbians. While Noormohamed and Che may be able debaters, they’re going to have a tough time defending their parties’ records on emissions, which are among the worst in the industrialized world. Climate feedback loops should be the election issue in 2021. They pose a greater threat to humanity over the long term than COVID-19. But that’s not likely to happen when we’re still in the midst of a global pandemic. And it’s far from certain that NDP Leader Jagmeet Singh will focus a great deal of attention on the climate, given the B.C. NDP’s support for liquefiednatural-gas plants. Because of that, Noormohamed remains the odds-on favourite. And if he wins, he’ll become the first Ismaili Muslim ever elected to Parliament in B.C., which would be no small accomplishment, given the magnitude of Islamophobia that still exists in Canada. g
Swiss psychoanalyst Carl Jung described the process of “individuation” as integrating the conscious and unconscious parts of ourselves to become self-actualized. According to Jung, the first stage is known as “differentiation”, which involves developing an individual personality. But how could Trudeau become his own man when his dad has had such a strong influence on the nation? For Trudeau, he had to break free, in a psychological sense. He became a snowboard instructor living on the West Coast. He decided that his marriage, unlike his father’s, was going to last for a very long time. And he would demonstrate his manliness in a boxing match. In a Jungian sense, Justin Trudeau’s process of individuation has unfolded quite well. He has his own fully formed personality, even after having grown up with such a famous and revered father. But it involved taking risks, embracing his impulsive side, and giving himself space to make errors, whether it was on the snowboard trails or in politics. On September 20, Canadians will find out if one of those mistakes was calling an election just when the world seemed like it was going to hell. g The end of this commentary was adapted from a piece on Straight.com.
AUGUST 19 – 26 / 2021
THE GEORGIA STR AIGHT
7
LIQUOR
Mighty Mai Tai has a long and complicated history
A
by Mike Usinger
s every fan of dive bars, bathtub bourbon, and giving free drinks to hobos knows, there’s an official day for almost everything where liquor is concerned. Make up a short version of a very long list and you’ll find celebrations that include Hot Buttered Rum Day (January 17), International Canned Cocktail Day (September 10), Moscow Mule Day (March 3), and International Pisco Sour Day February 6). June 6 is Give a Bum a Drink Day, and June 5 is Moonshine Day. January 1 is both Hangover Day and Bloody Mary Day. That makes sense because, if you’re going to wake up feeling like Shane McGowan after Free Booze for Irish Barflies Day, you’ll need some salt and vegetables with the hair of the dog to get you through things. This past Monday (August 16) was National Rum Day. A little more open for debate is when we’re supposed to appease the Tiki gods by embracing National Mai Tai Day. Depending on where you’re looking, the celebration of one of the world’s most famous tropical drinks is June 30. Or maybe it’s a couple of weeks from now on August 30. That there’s some dispute about when to break out the Martinique and Jamaican rums, orgeat and simple syrups, orange liqueur, and fresh limes somehow makes sense given there’s considerable debate about who invented the Mai Tai. In his completely indispensable Sippin’ Safari, tiki-drink historian Jeff “Beachbum” Berry goes back in history to trace the somewhat hazy birth of the cocktail. Depression-era band leader Harry Owens was both the composer of the Oscar-winning Hawaiian staple “Sweet Leilani” and the architect of Waikiki’s fabled Royal Hawaiians orchestra. Later on, he often claimed to have invented the Mai Tai while hanging around the bar of the iconic Royal Hawaiian Hotel. More credibly, tiki-drink God and Polynesian chain restaurant visionary Trader Vic Bergeron is widely credited with coming up
Appleton Estate 8 Year Old makes a great Mai Tai substitute for hard-to-find Martinique rum.
with the cocktail in 1944. After setting out to create the “finest drink we could make”, Trader Vic presented his resulting rumbased concotion to a couple of friends from Tahiti who declared it “mai tai”. Translated, that more or less meant “the best”. The only problem was that equally legendary tiki visionary Donn “Don the Beachcomber” Beach spent a good portion of his post-1950s time on Earth claiming that Trader Vic completely copped his style. Or, more accurately, his drink. According to Berry—who truly deserves a gold medal for research, and whose New Orleans restaurant Latitude 29 is a mustvisit—Trader Vic spent an evening at Don the Beachcomber’s Hinky Dink’s restaurant in 1937. While there, he not only twigged into Beach being onto something with his Polynesian decor, but also decided that a Beachcomber drink called the Q.B. Cooler was the best thing ever. Said drink mixed orange juice, club soda, Appleton and Pontalba rums with an
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array of additional ingredients: Don’s honey mix, falernum, ginger syrup, Angostura bitters, lime, and Western Pearl demerara rum. Berry’s verdict: “This recipe tastes remarkably similar to Vic’s Mai Tai. Even more remarkable is how Vic re-created the Q.B.’s flavour using almost entirely different ingredients: the two drinks have nothing in common except lime and rum.” Given that the ingredients are so different, he argues that Vic gets credit for inventing the Mai Tai, which became such a sensation that, by the late ’50s, it was on the list of every second restaurant in America. Predictably, because there was no Internet, and because neither Don the Beachcomber or Trader Vic were sharing their recipes, few bartenders got the drink right. That unrepentant bastardization of the Mai Tai lasted for decades. To order the cocktail in the 1970s was to get white rum mixed with anything from concentrated pineapple juice or Tang crystals to a melted burnt-orange Crayola crayon with a DayGlo maraschino cherry for colour. Even today, it’s hard to find a place that will do things totally right, at least in Vancouver. The reason? That would be the fact that a truly authentic Mai Tai, as invented by Trader Vic, calls for not only aged Jamaican rum, but also Martinique rum. (Side note: as truly obsessive liquor nerds know, rum more than any other spirit, can ruin a drink if you reach for the wrong bottle. Dispute that all you want, but not before making a Painkiller with Havana Club, or a Mojito with Pusser’s.) Finding aged Jamaican rum isn’t a problem on the West Coast. Appleton Estate 8 Year Old Reserve will not only do the job, but is actually pretty damn great, rich with notes of smokey honey, sticky vanilla, and
freshly ground allspice. Where things get challenging is sourcing Martinique rum, which is made from fresh-pressed sugarcane juice and known by the official designation “rhum agricole”. There are over a dozen rum distilleries on the tiny Caribbean Island and, should you ever be in the mood to load up and pay the duty, they produce over 200 different bottles to choose from. Those range from the Mai Tai–friendly St. James Hors D’Age to the almost tequilalike Trois Rivières Rhum Blanc Agricole. Whether vegetal or floral, all Martinique rums have something in common: you can’t find them in government-operated British Columbia liquor stores. In fact, you’ve never been able to buy any of them in British Columbia, at least for the 10 years that this liquor nerd has spent fruitlessly looking for Martinique rum. (In Paris, a variety of Martinique rums are readily available on the shelves of the corner grocery stores, which is why my suitcase is always loaded down with St. James and Rhum Dillon when returning from vacation, as opposed to six bottles of Romanée-Conti Grand Cru.) So, because getting hold of Martinique rum in Vancouver is currently out of the question, how do you make an authentic Trader Vic Mai Tai? Well, you can start by holding off until September. The Straight fired off an email to province-run British Columbia Liquor Stores asking why Martinique rum continues to be nonexistent on shelves. The following good news came back: “The BC Liquor Stores (BCLS) category manager expects BCLS will have the Saint James - Agricole Royal Ambre, which is a brand of Martinique rum, available in stores in early September.” Until then, you won’t disappoint anyone by subbing in Appleton Estate 8 Year Old Reserve for the Martinique in the following recipe, which was unearthed by Berry for Sippin’ Safari. Don’t forget to whip up tiki’s most famous cocktail on August 30—or um, next June 30—for National Mai Tai Day. And don’t even think about putting your own ’70s-style spin on things with pineapple juice, orange juice, burnt-orange crayon, or packet of Tang that’s been in your great grandparent’s cupboard since the moon landing. TRADER VIC’S MAI TAI
1 oz. amber Martinique Rum (St. James or Clément) 1 oz. aged Jamaican Rum 1/2 oz. orange Curacao 1 oz. fresh lime juice 1/4 oz. orgeat syrup 1/4 oz. simple syrup Shake well with crushed ice. Pour into a double old-fashioned glass and garnish with a mint sprig. g
ARTS
Reborn Studio 58 places a premium on positivity by Alina Blackett
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For Studio 58 students, being in the classroom is joyful and uplifting. Photo by Emily Cooper.
angara College’s nationally renowned professional theatre training program is poised for a revival. When Courtenay Dobbie took the helm of Studio 58 in January, the theatre school was still navigating the uncertain seas of the pandemic. But as B.C.’s COVID-19 restart plan moves forward, the new artistic director reminds us that with uncertainty comes hope. “It was really amazing to watch how art still survived and always will survive,” was one of the first things Dobbie said during a phone interview. She said that making art safely was not only possible but also successful because of people’s innate desire to connect with one another. “It was really heartwarming, uplifting, and hopeful.” Creating theatre in the midst of a pandemic was not without challenge, though. “That extra level of safety was always in the background,” Dobbie added. She explained that the artistic process is inherently collaborative and that our natural inclination is to be close, to be together, and she recalled watching the students having to work against their impulses to maintain the required physical distance. “The most commonly used phrase in class was, ‘Remember to stay apart,’ ’’ she said. The arts were hit hard by COVID-19. Studio 58 was one of the many institutions that had no choice but to adapt in innovative ways. “There was some great form and structure to be taken from it,” Dobbie said. Out of the many different forms they tried, the hybrid of theatre and film (for example, designing a play specifically to be filmed) was particularly effective.
If you happened to catch any of Studio 58’s spring programming, you would have seen that even though the shows looked a bit different, there was still beauty and meaning to be found. “The training and productions took on this other level of perseverance and human tenacity,” Dobbie said.
playwright Drew Hayden Taylor, is an example of this. “We have a fantastic opportunity where we have Indigenous students in our cohort, and then we have this play that’s written by a famous Canadian Indigenous playwright, and it will be directed by two Indigenous directors.” Dobbie shared. Cerulean Blue was originally commissioned for a large ensemble cast by Ryerson University, so it suits the challenging theatre-school criteria of a 20-plus-person cast. Dobbie noted that this as an exciting possibility for the future: “Hopefully, theatre companies will start commissioning and start making new plays.” Theatre education and training has changed over the years. Dobbie is a graduate of the acting program at Studio 58 and Mount Royal College and holds an MFA in directing from UBC, so she has experienced how fast things evolve in the postsecondary artistic world. “There is so much more dialogue between instructor and student,” Dobbie said. She explained that even though there are still lessons to be taught, there is more collaboration and conversation rather than simply being told what to do all the time.
“Young people are the future thinkers… so they move and demand quickly and it’s our job to respond quickly and make sure that those ideas are happening, that it’s moving along.” This summer is a time to prepare for the new era that’s coming in the fall. “We’re still in this sort of holding place,” Dobbie pondered. “The thought of us being able to be in a classroom again together without having to social-distance, it just kind of seems like a dream.” She emphasized the positivity she feels for the program, the artistic projects, and the new state of the theatrical world. Dobbie said that not only is it time to put all the important work that’s been done in the past year and a half into practice but it’s also time to welcome fun back. “I just want the students to run up to each other after not seeing each other over the summer and give each other a hug—to hold each other’s hands, to be able to sit in a circle and close our eyes together and breathe together.” g Tickets for Studio 58’s 2021/2022 season went on sale in August. All productions will be presented live in the theatre.
A SEASON OF REAWAKENING
“I really wanted to offer pieces that were a celebration of the human spirit,” Dobbie said of the school’s 2021-22 lineup that was announced back in June. All shows will welcome live audiences, if everything goes according to plan. Coming out of the pandemic, Dobbie described a need for a “resurfacing, rebirth, reckoning… a reawakening”. It’s not just the pandemic from which we’re waking. The demand for and a commitment to long-overdue social change has become the focus of institutions and individuals alike. “It’s our duty to respond,” Dobbie affirmed. She stressed the importance of the school demonstrating the best practices possible so that when the students graduate, they have a more equitable vocabulary and practice to offer to the professional world. “I really want to usher in…a time of more awareness of honoring…and support.” The school is working to diversify the curriculum by bringing in more BIPOC playwrights for the classroom scene work and finding material in productions that can match the cultural and gender diversity of the students. The first show of the upcoming season, Cerulean Blue, by award-winning Ojibway
FiNaL WeEkS - On ViEw UnTiL SePtEmBeR 6 TiCkEtS At VaNaRtGaLlErY.Bc.Ca Organized by the Vancouver Art Gallery and is an initiative of the Institute of Asian Art, curated by Diana Freundl, Interim Chief Curator/Associate Director. Sun Xun, Mythology or Rebellious Bone, 2020 (detail), ink, gold leaf, natural colour pigment on paper, Courtesy of the Artist and ShanghART Gallery
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ARTS
Harmonia leader unifies as conductor and teacher
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by Charlie Smith
icholas Urquhart sees many parallels between leading an orchestra and educating secondary students. And he’s in a good position to make this assessment as both a conductor of many ensembles and the strings director at Killarney Secondary School. There, he oversees five orchestras. In a phone interview with the Straight, Urquhart said that whether he’s dealing with students or professional musicians, he must be able to explain the structures, theory, and technical aspects of the music. “At the same time, that’s not enough for students to succeed,” Urquhart added. “They need inspiration. They need to be engaged in the music. They need to believe. They have to have confidence, so that’s something that you work with them over time in developing a sense of their own abilities. And I would do the same thing with orchestras.” Urquhart conducts the Harmonia Orchestra, which will perform its first live concert since the start of the pandemic on the Labour Day weekend as part of TAIWANfest. The theme of the concert is “sooner or later”, Urquhart said, which will bring together European and Taiwanese traditions of orchestral music. It will include four pieces from Taiwan that were arranged for this event. He explained that even though Taiwanese music has a five-note scale structure, it
Nicholas Urquhart is really looking forward to conducting Harmonia Orchestra’s first live performance since the start of the pandemic; it will take place on the Labour Day weekend.
sounds “incredibly different” than five-note scale-structured music from the United States, Denmark, and many other countries. “There’s nothing particularly new about the harmony or the rhythm or the notes, but in the way that it’s put together, it certainly takes to you to Taiwan and to Asia,” Urquhart said. In fact, the orchestra has become so enamoured with what it has learned that it’s considering going on tour to Taiwan, which is an independent nation about the size of Vancouver Island off the coast of mainland China.
Harmonia first performed at last year’s virtual TAIWANfest, playing to the camera at the Orpheum Annex in Vancouver. This taped performance was shown alongside a video of an Indigenous youth orchestra from Taiwan. “We played some of the same music and it was interesting to hear different interpretations,” Urquhart said. “It was all prerecorded and edited and assembled.” He described Harmonia as an “amateur orchestra”, with several professional musicians who donate their time. It was founded by the principal viola player, Tony Lee,
who originally called it the I Musici Sushi Chamber Orchestra because he would buy sushi for all the musicians. Urquhart said the name stuck for about a decade, but it was changed to Harmonia a few years back because the moniker didn’t seem to fit, given the quality of the musicianship. “Ever since then, it’s been a little bit more structured and a little bit more professional,” he noted. “It sort of moved to the next level.” Urquhart originally played double bass for the orchestra, but after conducting a couple of concerts, he was kept on in this role. He credits three of his former professors, in particular—Kenneth Friedman, Yariv Aloni, and Dale Lonis—for expanding his understanding of pedagogy and how to motivate musicians from the podium, and how to experience more joy in the music. As a conductor, Urquhart cherishes giving the players freedom while promoting a unifying vision. “I think I’m quite good at explaining in a sophisticated yet approachable way what the vision could be,” he said. “And usually our players are pretty onboard with that and we get good results because of that.” g Harmonia Orchestra will perform Sooner or Later live at 4 p.m. on September 6 on the north plaza of the Vancouver Art Gallery as part of TAIWANfest.
SD Holman says goodbye to Queer Arts Festival
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by Charlie Smith
ne of Vancouver’s most influential queer arts administrators is going to take a well-deserved break. S D Holman cofounded the Queer Arts Festival 14 years ago and in 2018 founded SUM, which is the festival’s year-round programming arm. At the close of this year’s Queer Arts Festival on August 13, Holman publicly announced that this would be the last under their direction. Holman, who served as executive and artistic director, is a self-described gender anarchist who uses a mix of pronouns. “I’m proud of the artistic triumphs we’ve achieved together,” Holman said in a statement, “including Jonathan D. Katz’s Drama Queer curation; the 25th-anniversary reunion of the notorious Kiss & Tell collective; Jeremy Dutcher’s first full-length Vancouver concert; UnSettled, the world’s first entirely Two-Spirit-curated festival; the commissioning and the world premiere of When the Sun Comes Out by Leslie Uyeda and Rachel Rose, Canada’s first lesbian opera; and co-producing the multi-award-winning world premiere of Lesley Ewen’s play Camera Obscura (hungry ghosts).” Holman’s replacement as artistic director is Mark Takeshi McGregor, a former executive director of the Powell Street Festival as well as an acclaimed flutist. He begins in this new position on October 1. “As a musician and visual artist, I’ve enjoyed close ties with this organization for over 15 years and I’ve witnessed 10
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SD Holman put many LGBT+ creators on the map in 14 years at the helm of the Queer Arts Festival. Photo by Queer Arts Festival.
firsthand how it has grown and evolved,” he said. “None of this would have been possible without the passion and tenacity of S D Holman, who leaves us with an inspiring legacy of queer arts and culture… and massive shoes to fill!” Holman was born in Hollywood and graduated from Emily Carr University of Art + Design in 1990. Holman’s work as an artist and curator has addressed themes of sex,
death, and identity, according to a Queer Arts Festival profile. In a column on Straight.com in 2016, Holman wrote about the violence that has been inflicted on queer people simply as a result of their gender expression, gender identity, or sexual orientation. It came in the wake of an attack on an LGBT+ nightclub in Orlando, Florida. “So many of us have stories of violence done to us. I am thinking of the man that came with a gun to my house in Rock Creek to shoot me, a story I have never told, until now—what’s yours?” Holman wrote. “My heart goes out to the families, chosen and biological, of the dead and wounded. We are going to be grieving for a very long time. Hate cannot bring an end to hate— only love can.” On a lighter note, Holman, along with Fay Ness and Stephanie Goodwin, came up with the idea of calling 2018 the “Year of the Queer” in Vancouver. It coincided with 15 Vancouver LGBT organizations celebrating milestone achievements. One of those was the Queer Arts Festival, which was then approaching its 10th anniversary. This change at the Queer Arts Festival follows a series of changes in leadership at a few other locally based queer organizations, including Vancouver Pride, Rainbow Refugee, and Health Initiative for Men. g With files from Craig Takeuchi.
AUGUST 19 – 26 / 2021
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MOVIES
Free Guy’s derivative plot engines rely on actors by Norman Wilner
MOVIE REVIEW FREE GUY
Starring Ryan Reynolds
d STOP ME IF you’ve heard this before: an unassuming, sweet-natured guy discovers that the life he lives is just a construct and reality is something entirely different from what he believes it to be. That’s the premise of literally dozens of novels, movies, and television shows—as well as the occasional documentary—and a concept that dates all the way back to Plato. But what Free Guy presupposes is this: what if the guy was actually named Guy? Thus we have Shawn Levy’s big, empty effects comedy, which stars Vancouver’s Ryan Reynolds as the eponymous protagonist, a genial bank teller in a mayhem game not unlike the Grand Theft Auto series. Every day is the same: wake up, get dressed, feed his fish, get coffee, go to work, get held up, cheerfully comply with whatever demands are expressed, go home, go to bed, start again. As a comic performer, Reynolds is in his sweet spot when he’s doing his cheerfulsarcastic thing: delivering withering insults with a big, phony grin. He’s so good at it that it’s weird to see him wear the grin on its own; you keep waiting for him to snap at someone. For a few minutes, Free Guy coasts nicely on that tension: what happens when Guy wakes up? And then we get the answer: what if They Live, but stupid.
Vancouver’s Ryan Reynolds tries to inject life into his Free Guy character but doesn’t have a lot to work with in the derivative film, while costar Jodie Comer’s role seems to be mostly ignored.
Guy’s awakening comes when he falls for a player (Jodie Comer) who’s running around in the game searching for evidence of a real-world conspiracy. (We learn this far too early, because the movie doesn’t trust its audience to have the patience for a gradual reveal.) Guy doesn’t really care about Molotov Girl’s side quest; he just wants to take her out for ice cream, which is sweet in a Wall•E sort of way. (Hey, that’s another movie about an artificial intelligence that transcends its programming!) But Free Guy has no interest in sweetness; it immediately throws game cops at Guy, sending him running for his life…until he Groundhog Days
back to waking up and starting over. So it’s a time-loop movie as well as a simulation movie, which opens up possibilities that the filmmakers simply refuse to explore. Instead, Levy and screenwriters Matt Lieberman and Zak Penn go for a mash-up of The Truman Show, The Matrix, and half a dozen other classic genre works, turning them all into a mushy be-yourself narrative for Reynolds’s Guy. And even then they refuse to let it play it out, constantly cutting away from Guy’s odyssey to spin out a B plot about Comer’s character in the real world, trying to prove her AI engine was stolen by Taika
Waititi’s swaggering tech bro. Yes, this is also a very familiar plot engine for many movies and television shows, and, no, Free Guy does not appear to be commenting on how utterly derivative both of its chosen plot engines are. The closest it comes to acknowledging its slapped-together nature is in a scene where Guy is pitted against a bad guy who was released into the game before being fully programmed: instead of an actual catchphrase, the character shouts “Catchphrase!” I laughed, then I realized there are funnier ways to play that bit, but the movie couldn’t be bothered. Anyway, that’s Free Guy. It’s far too long and not nearly as funny as it could be, despite the wealth of talent involved. The filmmakers can’t be bothered to mine its premise for anything more than superficial, moment-to-moment activity; instead, they just throw money at the effects and the production design and assume the actors will make it all work on the day. Reynolds and Waititi both try very hard to invest their characters with some sort of life— to the point that it’s very easy to tell when they’re making up their own dialogue—while Comer is just sort of around because the movie doesn’t really care about her character in either the real world or the game. Still, she has more agency than poor Joe Keery as her former coding partner, now an unhappy tech in Waititi’s company who spends most of his scenes staring confusedly at a screen, trying to make sense of what he’s seeing. If nothing else, I could relate to that. g
Kiawentiio cast in live-action Netflix Avatar series
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by Glenn Sumi
ising star Kiawentiio is having one of her acting dreams come true. The (now) 15-year-old was featured in the Straight’s Rising Screen Stars issue last spring for her remarkable performance in the title role of Tracey Deer’s film Beans. At the end of her interview, she said she’d love to work on Avatar: The Last Airbender. “I’m dying to be Katara,” she said about the role of the kick-ass waterbender from the Southern Water Tribe, one of four leads in the beloved Nickelodeon animation series. On August 14, the cast and creative team of a new Netflix live-action adaptation of the series was announced with, you guessed it, Kiawentiio playing fierce warrior Katara. The new series also stars Gordon Cormier as Aang, the master of all four elements, Ian Ousley as Sokka (Katara’s older brother) and Dallas Liu as Zuko, a firebender. Albert Kim (Sleepy Hollow, Nikita) is 12
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the series’ showrunner, executive producer, and writer. In a blog post accompanying the Netflix news release, he revealed how he got interested in the original series by watching with his young daughter. “She’s the one who got me hooked,” he wrote. Kim says VFX technology has advanced a lot since the animated series aired from 2005 to 2008. “A live-action version can not only faithfully translate what had been done in animation,” he says, “it can bring a rich new visual dimension to a fantastic world. We’ll be able to see bending in a real and visceral way we’ve never seen before.” Kim also sees the new version as being a “new benchmark” in terms of representation for generations of new fans. “This [is] a chance to showcase Asian and Indigenous characters as living, breathing people. Not just in a cartoon but in a world that truly exists, very similar to the one we live in.” g
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Kiawentiio appeared in Anne With an E before her breakout role as a Mohawk girl in Beans, but one of her greatest ambitions as an actor has been to play Katara in Avatar: The Last Airbender.
MUSIC / SAVAGE LOVE
Vancouver concert announcements this week
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by Steve Newton
ancouver’s live-music promoters have kicked off the August 16 workweek with some new concert announcements. MRG Live West started things off with news that Florida metalcore band Underoath will be at the Vogue Theatre on March 2, 2022, with guests Every Time I Die and Spiritbox. Around the same time the Rickshaw Theatre announced that L.A. indie-rock singer-songwriter Ty Segall would grace its stage, backed by his Freedom Band, on February 5, 2022. A couple of hours later, Timbre Concerts put out word that Texas psych-
rock quintet the Black Angels will be touching down at the Commodore Ballroom this November 8, with guests L.A. Witch. Timbre then announced that the Briston Maroney show originally scheduled for the Fox Cabaret on February 22, 2022, has been moved to the Hollywood Theatre. Blueprint Events joined the fray by tweeting that Atlanta hip-hop trio Migos are playing an all-ages show at the PNE Forum this September 24, with guests Smiley and Ruts World. For all the latest concert news, follow @ vanhappenings on Twitter. g
This week’s barrage of new Vancouver concert announcements includes the September 24, 2021, appearance at the PNE Forum by Atlanta hip-hop trio Migos. Photo by David Rams.
What to do when partner’s major kink has gotten old
Scan to conffess
by Dan Savage
b IS IT EVER okay to stop being GGG? I’ve been with my husband for 26 years. Shortly after we got together, my husband disclosed a major kink: MFM threesomes. I was young and a virgin and up for anything then, but we didn’t start hooking up with other men until around year six of our relationship. Over the last 20 years we’ve been on-and-off with this. We had children, we took a break, and we found the time to go wild now and then. My husband’s interests expanded into dominance play—owning me and sharing me—but I’m in my late 40s now and my husband is in his 50s. I’m approaching menopause and my sex drive has decreased. There were also instances where I was basically sexually assaulted—or at the very least, my boundaries were not respected on more than one occasion. Long story short, I want to be done being kinky. I want my body to be mine. My husband and I have been having other marital problems, and he thinks my rejection of his kinkiness is a rejection of him. I’ve told him I’m still interested in sex, I’m just tired of being GGG. He says he isn’t interested in vanilla sex with me because he is “disappointed”. When I told him to outsource his kink, he said, “Good luck finding that as a married man.” Am I ever allowed to retire from his kink? - My Years Being Obedient Done
First and most importantly, if your husband
stood by and did nothing while your boundaries were violated in front of him—or if he violated your boundaries himself—then there’s an asshole in this marriage, MYBOD, and it ain’t you. But seeing as you’re still with your husband and still interested
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Saturated Someone messages me multiple times a day. Videos, texts, content. It’s too much. They need connection and attention. I’ve nothing to give right now; depressed with life as it were. I just want to go in a cave and be left alone for a month or three. I’m sensing that people are at their wits end as people seem more needy this month. I need to disconnect from everything. I got my own shit to deal with.
Nice try Dan says that obliging a partner’s kink should be within reason. Photo by Getty/Motortion.
in having vanilla sex with him, I’m gonna assume your husband recognized how he failed you on those occasions when you were violated and that he’s shown remorse, apologized specifically and profusely, and made whatever changes he needed to make for you to feel safe with him. If he’s done none of those things—if he hasn’t done all of those things—you should leave him. Zooming out for new readers: GGG stands for “good, giving, game”. As in, “good in bed, giving of pleasure, and game for anything—within reason”. I believe we should be GGG for our partners and that our partners should be GGG for us. Being GGG, however, does not mean doing whatever your partner wants. That’s why the final G has always come with that italicized-for-emphasis qualifier: “game for anything—within reason”. Being game means recognizing your partner will have sexual interests that you don’t share and being up for giving those things a try—so
I bought a bottle of wine at a non-government liquor store. On the payment machine, it asked me how much I wanted to tip. No tip was my choice. Even if the guy bagged my bottle of wine, I wouldn’t tip him. I think I should call the store during daytime hours and ask them why they want to do this. There’s zero service involved and it’s just awkward. I’m still sober and not easy guilted into parting with money. It’s like a test for fools.
Porno I’ve been watching it regularly for the first time in my life. I’m a 43 year old woman in case that changes what people think. Most of it is either gross or boring. I guess I just got curious what all the hype was about.
Not anyone’s soul battery As a gay man, it disgusts me when a straight man tries flirting with me, especially at work. It’s unfortunate that someone feels the need for attention so badly to pretend like that. Leading on someone to energize themselves and restore self-esteem is beyond selfish, it’s gross. I pretend to go along with it but privately make a point to set them up for some deep, humiliating regret. It’s what they get for trying to use people and I don’t feel guilty at all.
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long as they’re reasonable. “Reasonable” is a subjective standard, of course, and we all get to decide for ourselves what may or may not be reasonable. Back to you, MYBOD. A kink for MMF threesomes is not a thing for feet or light spanking. It’s a big ask. And if your husband knew he needed MMF threesomes to feel sexually fulfilled, sharing that when he did—early in the relationship—was the right thing for him to do. He laid his kink cards on the table before you got married, before you had kids, and when you could easily walk away. You didn’t walk away. You told him you were open to the idea—you told him you were one of those rare “up for anything” virgins—and he didn’t rush you into anything. Six years went by before you had your first threesome. And while MMF threesomes probably aren’t something you would’ve sought out on your own, MYBOD, I’m hoping you enjoyed some of them—you know, the ones that didn’t involve boundary violations so egregious that you experienced them not as sexual adventures you were having with your husband but as sexual assaults your husband participated in and Jesus Fucking Christ on the Cross. In all honesty, MYBOD, I’m having a hard time getting past those boundary violations.
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But seeing as you got past them—seeing as you’re still interested in being with your husband—I’m going to continue to assume he somehow made things right and advise you accordingly. If he didn’t make things right, disregard my advice and divorce the motherfucker already. Alright, you asked me if you can stop being GGG, MYBOD, and my answer is no. I think you should continue being GGG. That doesn’t mean you have to continue having MMF threesomes with your husband. You can decide you’re done with that—you can take them from the menu permanently— while still being GGG in other ways. You’re also allowed to be done with Dom/ sub play. (Your husband never owned you and your body was never his to share. That was naughty dirty talk you indulged in, not a deed of sale you have to honour.) And doing what you’re doing—giving your partner permission to get a specific sexual need met elsewhere— is one way a person can be GGG. There’s this need, this kink of his, that’s important to him—so important he brought up early on— and you met that need for a long time but can’t meet it anymore. But you’re good enough, giving enough, and game enough to give him your blessing to get his kink on with other people. So you haven’t stopped being GGG. You’re being GGG in a different way now.
Careers Better Care Appliance Repair Inc. is looking for Appliance Servicers,Greater Vancouver, BC. Perm, F/T (40 hrs/w), Wage - $ 24 /hr. Main duties: Service and repair all kinds of appliances of different brands, Conduct appliance diagnosis, Identify reasons of breakdown, Disassemble appliance, Repair or replace components, and reassemble appliance, Perform maintenance work, Adjust and reprogram appliances, Interact with our customers, Maintain records of performed work. Requirements: 1-2 years of experience or completion of an apprenticeship program. Good English, High school Company’s business address: 48 W 20th Ave, Vancouver BC V5Y 2C1 Please apply by e-mail: bettercareappliance@gmail.com
Domb Enterprises Inc.
o/a Basil Pasta Bar is looking for Cooks. Perm, Full Time, Shifts, Weekends. Salary: $19.00 /hour. Requirements: Experience min. 1-2 years, Good English. Education: Secondary school. Main duties: Prepare and cook complete meals; Portion, arrange and garnish food based on client preference; Operate various kitchen appliances; Oversee kitchen operations and train new kitchen staff; Supervise and co-ordinate kitchen helpers; Assist other cooks during the food assembly process; Keep food preparation areas clean as determined by law and company policy; Maintain inventory and records of food, supplies and equipment. Job location and business address: 636 Davie St., Vancouver BC V6B 2G5 Please apply by e-mail: Job@basilpastabar.com
And just as you’re not obligated to have kinky sex with your husband, your husband is not obligated to have vanilla sex with you. If you think he’s withholding sex right now because he’d be disappointed, well, maybe you can see how it might be disappointing and give him a little time to get over it. But if, on the other hand, you think he’s withholding sex to manipulate you into having threesomes again, that’s a deeply shitty thing to do and you should leave him. P.S. Please show this to your husband, MYBOD: Dude. Get over your disappointment already. You had a good run. I hope you’re grateful and I hope you found some way to make up for boundary violations. Assuming you did: the sooner you stop fucking sulking and start fucking looking, the sooner you’ll find couples seeking male thirds. And you know those couples are out there because you and your wife used to be one of those couples. And far from being a stumbling block, the fact that you’re married is a selling point for many couples seeking thirds. (A married or partnered man is seen as less threatening for obvious reasons.) And I don’t know if you’ve been online recently, but hot daddies are very much in demand these days, and dominant daddies get a lot of play. Your wife isn’t taking your kink from you. She’s telling you to get this need met
FMI Brands Inc.
dba Outland Living is looking for an e-commerce manager, Perm, F/T. Wage - $ 38 hourly. Extended medical benefits; dental, life, long term disability insurance. Requirements: good English, several years of exp., high school; a bachelor's degree or a college diploma is an asset. Main duties: Manage daily operations of the e-commerce department; Set goals, oversee progress monitoring; Be responsible for the online sales of the brand; Develop and implement e-commerce strategy, execute sales campaigns; Research market; Hire, train and motivate staff; Plan and control budget;Prepare reports. Company’s business address and job location: #107-19052 26 Avenue, Surrey, BC V3Z 3V7 Please apply by e-mail: employment.outlandliving@gmail.com
Rakes and Ladders (Horticultural Services Ltd) is hiring gardeners to join our team. Experience preferred but not necessary. Must be a team player, fit and enjoy working outside. We are based out of a warehouse at Laurel and SW Marine Drive, Vancouver (a short walk from Canada Line Marine Dr. station) and work at sites around Vancouver. A typical day runs 7:30am to 3:30pm. We run a drug and smoke free work environment respectful of others. We encourage Veterans, Indigenous peoples, LGBT and new Canadians to consider joining us.
We offer: - A fun and supportive work environment (great social functions). - $18 to $22/hr starting, depending on experience. After 3 month probationary period: - Work clothes and a boot allowance. - We pay 70% of extended health care. - Comissions and bonuses. - Pay for work related education and qualifications.
Please contact Jeff:
Jeff@rakesandladders.com 778-231-7706
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b I’M FRESHLY OUT of a relationship and new to Grindr and I’m realizing that for me to get hard, I need slow kissing, I need to vibe to music, and especially need a soft touch on my dick. Too many guys pull on it with no lube and that makes me go soft. Slowly kissing to a chill song is my jam. Also, my dick is sensitive near the bottom of the shaft and I need wet fingers to go all the way down to the base of my dick in order to come. Is there a term for this or a name for me? Or do I need to send a paragraph to all the tricks I message? - Very Into Being Erect
All you gotta do is tell the guy who shows up at your apartment that you’re into soft kissing— the music you like can already be playing— and then show him how you like your dick stroked. The guys yanking your dick without lube aren’t trying to make you go soft. They’re making their best guess about what might work for you, a guess most likely informed by what works for them and other guys. I promise you, VIBE, the guys from Grindr aren’t pulling on your dick maliciously. Quite to the contrary, VIBE, your gentlemen callers are pulling on your dick with the best of intentions. g
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JOB TYPE: FULL-TIME Salary: From $35.00 to $40.00/hour (depending on experience)
send resume to: jamie@sitkawest.com
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CARPENTER POSITION
AYAC Construction Solutions Ltd. (New Westminster, BC. Canada) COMPENSATION: $29.00 -$40.00 drawings and sketches to determine specifications and calculate (depending on experience). requirements. - 40 Hours per week - Prepare layouts in conformance to - Employment type: full-time building codes, using measuring - Experience: Min. 2-3 years of tools-Build foundations, install experience required. floor beams, lay sub-flooring and - Languages: English. Written and Oral Spanish a bonus. erect walls and roof systems. - Duties: Measure, cut, shape, as- - Pour and Place concrete. semble and join materials made COMPENSATION: of wood, wood substitutes, lightweight steel and other materials. $29.00 to $40.00/hour (depending on experience) - Maintain, repair and renovate residences and wooden structures. APPLY BY EMAIL : info@ayacconstruction.com - Read and interpret blueprints,
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