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10 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

CONTENTS

Mount Seymour. Chris Morley photo.

13

FEATURE

From multiroom bashes and speakeasy soirees to travelling dance parties and underground raves, there’s a New Year’s Eve event somewhere in Vancouver for every budget. > BY LUCY L AU AND K ATE WILSON

16

NEWS

Fay Blaney says the inquiry into missing and murdered indigenous women must address patterns of gender-based violence. > BY AMANDA SIEBERT

START HERE

24

FEATURE

Politicians, restaurateurs, musicians, a chocolatier, a baker, a brewer, a cannabis promoter, and other local personalities share their traditions for the holidays.

31

FOOD

If you’re looking for somewhere new to go for dinner, check out these noteworthy additions to the local restaurant scene. > BY GAIL JOHNSON

35

ARTS

Betroffenheit, Onegin, Joyce DiDonato’s In War and Peace, and Robert Lepage’s 887 were just some of this city’s most memorable performing-arts shows in 2016.

41

COVER

You wouldn’t know it from a box-office crowded by franchises, but our year-end favourites prove that 2016 was a killer year for sharp, original, inspired new cinema.

45

MUSIC

23 33 59 26 27 59 52 44 38 48 55 59 56 37

Books The Bottle Confessions Green Living Health I Saw You Local Discs Movie Reviews Music Pop Eye Real Estate Savage Love Straight Stars Theatre

COVER ILLUSTRATION

pacificfer tility.ca

TIME OUT 39 Arts 28 Events 53 Music

SERVICES 56 Careers 29 Healthy Living 55 Real Estate

Find out who prefers Nat King Cole and who favours Elmo & Patsy as we ask a few of our favourite locals to dish, among other matters, on their favourite Christmas hits.

56

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NEW YEAR’S EVE

The Hotel Vancouver will cordon off a floor this year for a massive, multiroom party. Corey Poluk for Lindsay’s Diet photo.

Go all out on New Year’s Eve > BY L UC Y LA U AN D KATE WIL SON

S

ure, it’s easy to curl up with a bag of Cheetos and Dick Clark’s (R.I.P.) fail-safe ball drop on December 31. But as your eyes glaze over at Shawn Mendes’s umpteenth performance of “Stitches”, orange crumbs collecting on your flannel PJs, Summer Roberts’s ol’ “the way you spend New Year’s Eve is the way you’re gonna spend the rest of the year” adage starts running through your mind.

You know the saying makes zero sense, but, truth be told, you’ve had a pretty decent 2016—maybe you finally conquered your debilitating fear of clowns, landed that job promotion you were after, or let go of a few toxic influences in your life— and, goddamnit, you’re not going to spend the last hours of it listening to Ryan Seacrest yakking about New Year’s resolutions and how beautiful Clark’s ball looks hanging in the sky.

Ahead, we’ve rounded up Vancouver’s most extravagant New Year’s Eve celebrations, where you can put that Christmas bonus to good use while ringing in 2017 in style.

NYE AT THE HOTEL VANCOUVER

(From 10 p.m. to 3 a.m. at the Fairmont Hotel Vancouver) The only thing better than a good NYE party is lots of good NYE parties—a principle that downtown icon the Hotel Vancouver

has taken to heart. Throwing one of the largest events in the city this year, Arrival Agency is cordoning off an entire floor of the historical building for a massive, multiroom celebration.

The floor’s five ballrooms will be turned into individually themed pop-up nightclubs, which are slated to showcase a range of different musical vibes. Highlights include dance-floor anthems from the ’70s and ’80s played by a live band; a hiphop room headlined by Red Bull Thre3style winner Hedspin; and an R&B dance party directed by local hero Zeeaa. The final room will offer a private bar, award-winning food, and an excellent place to chill out— which, let’s face it, is an absolute necessity after enjoying a blistering amount of dancing. Tickets start at $99 at hotelvancouvernye.com/.

NYE 2017 AT THE TELUS WORLD OF SCIENCE (From 9 p.m. to 3 a.m.

effects are expected to take the event to the next level.

Although the venue has a capacity of 1,200 heads, the affair consistently sells out. Regular tickets include a Champagne toast at midnight and VIP bottle service is also available.

Semiformal attire is required. Tickets start at $85 at clubzone.com/.

MAGIC SPIRIT YACHT NEW YEAR’S EVE 2017 (From 9 p.m. to 1

a.m., departing from 750 Pacific Boulevard) The advent of 2017 moves us ever closer to the centenary of the Roaring ’20s—but the Magic Spirit Yacht’s speakeasy cruise makes sure you don’t have to wait three more years to legitimately pull on your pink-beaded, artdeco, high-halter flapper dress.

The Gatsby-themed event makes use of the Magic Spirit Yacht’s two decks to host a double bill of local DJs spinning Top 40 and EDM hits—which, let’s be honest, is much better than trying to dance to 1920s jazz. Complimentary appetizers, free party favours, and—despite the Prohibition-era theme—plenty of alcohol are also provided. The event has a strict semiformal dress code and flapper attire is encouraged but not required. Tickets start at $129 at clubzone.com/.

at Science World) Science World may be teeming with screaming children throughout the year, but it shuts its doors to the under-19 crowd come December 31 in order to host one of the city’s biggest NYE bashes. Presented by Twisted Productions, Hollywood Promotions, and John Donnelly & Associates, this year’s edition features five fully licensed bars and two separate floors LA VIE EN ROSE (From 9 p.m. to 2 of music, where six of Vancouver’s a.m. at the Pinnacle Hotel Harbourbest DJs will be on deck. A topnotch front) From the people who brought sound system and special lighting see page 15

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The Georgia Straight | Vancouver’s News and Entertainment Weekly | Volume 50 Number 2556 1635 West Broadway, Vancouver, B.C. V6J 1W9 www.straight.com Phone: 604-730-7000 / Fax: 604-730-7010 / e-mail: gs.info@straight.com Display Advertising: 604-730-7020 / Fax: 604-730-7012 / e-mail: sales@straight.com Classifieds: 604-730-7060 / e-mail: classads@straight.com Subscriptions: 604-730-7000 Distribution: 604-730-7087 EDITOR + PUBLISHER Dan McLeod ASSOCIATE PUBLISHER Yolanda Stepien GENERAL MANAGER Matt McLeod EDITOR Charlie Smith SECTION EDITORS

Janet Smith (Arts/Fashion) Mike Usinger (Music) Steve Newton (Time Out) Adrian Mack (Movies) Brian Lynch (Books) EDITORIAL ADMINISTRATOR Doug Sarti ASSOCIATE EDITORS

Gail Johnson, John Lucas, Alexander Varty STAFF WRITERS

Tammy Kwan, Lucy Lau, Travis Lupick, Carlito Pablo, Amanda Siebert, Craig Takeuchi, Kate Wilson SENIOR EDITOR Martin Dunphy EDITORIAL ASSISTANT Jennie Ramstad PROOFREADER Pat Ryffranck CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Gregory Adams, Nathan Caddell, David Chau, Jack Christie, Jennifer Croll, Ken Eisner (Movies), George Fetherling, Tara Henley, Michael Hingston, Ng Weng Hoong, Alex Hudson, Kurtis Kolt,

Robin Laurence (Visual Arts), Mark Leiren-Young, John Lekich, Amy Lu, Bob Mackin, Michael Mann, Rose Marcus, Beth McArthur, Verne McDonald, Allan MacInnis, Guy MacPherson, Tony Montague, Kathleen Oliver, Ben Parfitt, Vivian Pencz, Bill Richardson, Gurpreet Singh, Jacqueline Turner, Andrea Warner, Jessica Werb, Stephen Wong, Alan Woo ART DEPARTMENT MANAGER

Janet McDonald SENIOR DESIGNER David Ko CONTRIBUTING ARTISTS

Alfonso Arnold, Rebecca Blissett, Trevor Brady, Louise Christie, Emily Cooper, Randall Cosco, Krystian Guevara, Evaan Kheraj, Kris Krug, Tracey Kusiewicz, Kevin Langdale, Shayne Letain, Matt Mignanelli, Mark “Atomos” Pilon, Carlo Ricci, William Ting, Alex Waterhouse-Hayward DIGITAL PRODUCT MANAGER

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DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 13

NEW YEAR’S EVE

Make new friends at the New Year’s Eve Decentralized Dance Party, which will take place in downtown city blocks and around public monuments.

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t some point between the advent of the Gregorian calendar and the modern day, venues realized that December 31 was a gold mine. Cashing in on the global desire to forget the last 12 shitty months by getting vomit-inducingly wasted, being speared through the foot by a stiletto, and increasing the likelihood of contracting genital warts, clubs started raising their prices to fit the demand.

That’s capitalism, man.

Sure, you could counter those expenses by heading over to your buddy Steve’s, sitting nicely around the TV set with a beer and a board game, and waiting for the fireworks to be televised at midnight—assuming, of course, that he’s one of those schmucks who still pay for cable. Or, thanks to the flourishing of grassroots and countercultural collectives in Vancouver, you could venture out to any number of these great parties for pennies on the dollar.

Because what could be a better way to ring in 2017 than partying like it’s 1999—with the prices to match?

huge pressure to make December 31 the biggest night of the year.

Main Street’s Colony Bar, however, is taking a different approach.

Letting you show up when you want, wear whatever you want, and drink whatever you want, Colony is, basically, hosting a normal Saturday night—which is music to the ears of anyone who dreads Big Occasions That You Have to Make a Huge Effort For. Admission is free.

F**K YOU 2016 NYE PARTY

(From 8 p.m. to 3 a.m. at Doolin’s Irish Pub) Let’s face it: 2016 kind of sucked. We lost a boatload of hugely influential stars, Donald Trump somehow became the president-elect of the United States, and, to top it all off, Apple decided to remove the cords on its earphones for some inexplicable reason.

Thus it’s hard not to be drawn to Doolin’s fittingly titled end-ofyear shindig. Say “see ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya” to the past 365 days as you groove to tunes from Vancouver’s Matt Hoyles and DJ Morgan while digging into a slew of party favours and games. Complimentary pizza and a straight shot of Jameson at midnight—this is an GROUNDWERK NEW YEAR’S Irish bar, after all—help seal the 2017 (From 10 p.m. to 4 a.m. at deal. F**k yeah, 2017! Tickets are the Anza Club) Fast establishing it- $20 at ticketvibe.com/. self as one of the best underground electronic-music collectives in Van- NEW YEAR’S EVE couver, Groundwerk is throwing a DECENTRALIZED DANCE PARTY two-floor extravaganza in Mount (From 9 p.m. to 1 a.m. at various Pleasant. One of the most inclusive locations) Wherever you go, New dance parties of the season, the New Year’s Eve is likely to be expensive— Year’s event welcomes people of all because alcohol has a unique talent genders (or people with no genders), for cleaning out a wallet. Or an ensexualities, and races. “No creeps al- tire bank account. For those who feel lowed,” reads its poster—so, if you’re they have little self-control around not a creep, Groundwerk is an excel- liquor, the Decentralized Dance lent New Year’s Eve bet for those who Party is a great place to ring in 2017.

The DDP is a giant mobile street like house, deep house, techno, tech house, and every variant in between. party, fuelled by boomboxes tuned As well as its lineup of excellent lo- in to the same radio transmission. cal artists—including I M U R, Tyler Elaborately costumed revellers dance Stadius, Nathan Mots, Dark Arps, through downtown city blocks, takand Diana Boss—the event will pro- ing over entire buses, SkyTrains, vide everything you need to keep go- and public monuments on a quest ing until 4 a.m. Boasting a full bar to gather a huge crowd of fun lovers. (necessary), a confetti countdown Creating an environment that, in the (charming), and a “mood lounge” founders’ words, “inspire[s] people to give your dancing blisters a rest, to lose their inhibitions, freak out, the event has all the ingredients for a and drive the energy to ridiculous great evening. Tickets start at $25 at heights”, the DDP’s ambulatory celebration—which once hit 20,000 parmyshowpass.com/groundwerk-nye/. ticipants in Vancouver—promises to THE ANTI-NYE PARTY be a great place to make new friends (From 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. at Colony Bar) for the new year. And it’s free.

Typically, New Year’s Eve is decidedly un-chill. “Start as you mean to go NO B.S. NEW YEAR’S EVE on” is the general motto of the even- PIZZA PARTY ing—and unless you want to spend (From 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. at the WISE 2017 going to bed at 11 p.m., being Hall & Lounge) Everybody knows incredibly sober, and never ever put- that, objectively, there are three see next page ting on your dancing shoes, there’s

types of cool parties: slumber parties, pool parties, and pizza parties.

Given that most people are no longer a high-school girl and that it’s been an absolutely freezing winter, we say bring on the pizza.

Rock-music events and booking company Apocalypse Sunrise will be hosting the No B.S. evening by offering a selection of some of the city’s best up-and-coming bands. Taking to the stage will be—amongst a number of others—punk-rock-meets-gypsyblues artists Devil in the Wood Shack, indie rockers Gold Stars Are for Suckers, and basement punks the Godspot.

The intimate East Van venue promises the chance to welcome 2017 with a number of like-minded individuals—and, with its 250-person capacity, there won’t be too much competition for that pizza. Tickets are $10 at the door.

Go all out on New Year’s Eve

from page 13

you the Deighton Cup, Harvest Haus, and Vancouver’s favourite love-to-hate event, Dîner en Blanc, comes La Vie en Rose, a “proper NYE party” that promises a countdown centred on class and elegance—in other words, the opposite of what many of us have come to associate with the final, shameful hours of the year.

Like previous events in the Social Concierge’s Draped in Style NYE series, La Vie en Rose takes place at downtown Vancouver’s Pinnacle Hotel— this time, freshly renovated—where you’ll find local DJs SKLA, NIKKY, and many more spinning into the wee hours of the morning.

Two decked-out ballrooms, live performances, and various art installations will ensure guests are entertained throughout the evening. Glasses of Moët & Chandon will quench thirsts, while a snack bar will take care of the munchies that hit postmidnight. Formal attire is required. Tickets start at $80 at myshowpass.com/nye2017/.

RUFF BLACK NYE 2017 (From 9 p.m. to 3 a.m.

(From 10 p.m. to 4 a.m. at Open at Hindenburg) Billed as Vancouver’s ultimate gay Studios) What could be a better men’s party, RUFF NYE is back after a two-year way to increase your 2017 street hiatus and it’s pulling out all the stops for its cred than beginning the year at an underground warehouse party?

Headlining the night will be international house-music star Doza.

Primarily known as one half of LawnChair Generals—a duo famed for its funky dance-floor fillers—the DJ also remixes and produces his own records with a more broody and spacey style, allowing him to serve up a blend of soundscapes and danceable hits in his live sets.

Local house-music legend Luke McKeehan has assembled a lineup of the city’s best underground DJs in support of the veteran, including Joel Armstrong, Mike McSuede, Iain Howie, and McKeehan himself. Be warned: a strong Vancouver following will undoubtedly turn out for those names, so tickets will sell fast. Don’t sleep on this one. Tickets start at $35 at resident advisor.net/.

NORDIC TRAX NYE 2017

triumphant return. Presented by local event-planning company MN Events, the New Year’s Eve extravaganza features two separate rooms and dance floors, where DJ Quest, Russ Rich, and DRKN— who’s flying in all the way from Beirut—will be working the decks until morning.

Performances by three previously crowned Mr. RUFFs—the winners of a personality contest also produced by MN—are on the agenda too. (And if the promotional images are any indication, they will be scantily clad.) The NYE affair is followed by an after-party at Steamworks Baths (123 Pender Street)—a short stumble away from Hindenburg— where partygoers can show their wristbands to nab $5 off the entry fee. Tickets start at $35 and may be purchased at Topdrawers (809 Davie Street) or at eventbee.com/v/ruffblacknye#/tickets/.

CIRQUE GALA NYE 2017 (From 9 p.m. to 4 a.m. at Fivesixty) Vancouver’s largest multilevel nightclub knows a thing or two about New Year’s Eve parties.

Reprising its classic circus-themed evening to welcome 2017, the venue is set to host elaborately costumed dancers, silk aerialists hanging from the club’s ceiling, and stilt walkers prancing through the crowds.

If you fancy tapping into your own exhibitionist side, the event promises a great soundtrack to get down and dirty with top tunes from some of

the city’s best mainstream house and hip-hop DJs. Spinning the club classics of 2016, the Cirque Gala’s resident selectors offer an excellent way to remember the best tracks of the last year—and, undoubtedly, flash back to all your party memories of the last 12 months. Which may or may not be a good thing. Tickets start at $50 at clubzone.com/.

NYE 2017 WATERFRONT GALA BALL (From

9 p.m. to 1 a.m. at the Fairmont Waterfront) Not down to wait in subzero temps for the city’s perfunctory fireworks to begin their anticlimactic ascent? Grab a seat at the Fairmont Waterfront’s Gala Ball, where you’ll nab a spectacular view of the pyrotechnics show as you nibble on appetizers and sip drinks from the party’s Grey Goose lounge.

L.A.–based DJ Ryan Live and Vancouver’s DJ Downlowe will be playing old-school and Top 40 beats in the grand ballroom, while smooth R&B classics will rule the Ice Bar. Ladies and gentlemen: dress to impress. (You’ll want to look fly for the red-carpet media wall.) And underage folk and freshly-turned-19-year-olds who can’t handle their vodka coolers need not apply: the event is 25-plus only. Tickets start at $140, and include access to a VIP after-party at Cabana Lounge (1159 Granville Street); get them at clubzone.com/. -

NOLA NYE

(From 7 p.m. to 4 a.m. at the Lamplighter Public House) If all this slush and snow has you itching for an end-of-year getaway, head over to the Lamplighter (92 Water Street) on December 31, where you can experience the vibrant scene of New Orleans, sans the plane ticket.

The Gastown institution will be transformed into NOLA’s historic Bourbon Street during Mardi Gras, with all the flashy beads and bangles to match. Dinner will be served for an additional price at 7 p.m. before tables are cleared and the dance party starts at 9 p.m.

Looking to kick it old-school instead? Fellow Donnelly Group venue Library Square (300 West Georgia Street) will be throwing it back with party anthems from the ’90s and aughts all night long. Tickets to both parties start at $10 at clubzone.com/.

FORTUNE SOUND NYE 2017

(From 10 p.m. to 4 a.m. at Fortune Sound Club) Fortune Sound Club is planning an event that might be even more festive than the video for Run-DMC’s “Christmas in Hollis”.

Choosing not to mess with a good thing, the venue’s NYE show treats partiers to a souped-up version of its club night SUP FU?, the biggest regular hip-hop evening in the city.

Residents Sailor Gerry and DJ Seko will be opening behind the decks, while DJ Marvel of the Freshest is slated to hit the ones and twos later in the evening. M.C. Dkay will, as ever, be on hand to whip the crowd into a 2016-hating frenzy—and with the death of Prince, Alan Rickman, David Bowie, and Harambe to lament, you better hope there’ll be plenty of excellent B-boys on hand to distract you from how shit this year really was.

Fortune’s New Year’s Eve show gives revellers a lot for their money, with free bubbly, party favours, confetti cannons, and a midnight balloon drop all on the cards—so, if you’re a hip-hop fan, there’s nowhere better to toast the death of 2016.

Tickets start at $20 at fortunesound club.electrostub.com/. -

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Fay Blaney fled her First Nation home at 13 and now fights for indigenous women’s rights. Amanda Siebert photo.

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or almost 40 years, Fay Blaney has worked tirelessly to bring to light the disproportionate level of violence faced by indigenous women in Canada.

In the year since the federal government launched an inquiry into missing and murdered indigenous women, she has been busy working to focus the commissioners’ agenda on the root of the cause.

“They are looking at colonization, and putting families first, and ‘systemic violence’—none of which are gender-specific,” the former UBC and Langara women’sstudies instructor tells the Georgia Straight during an interview at the

Carnegie Centre. “There has yet to be any examination of male violence against women.”

In 2016, Blaney organized three national gatherings on the inquiry: on International Women’s Day (March 8), Aboriginal Day (June 21), and the anniversary of the Montreal Massacre (December 6).

Blaney likens these events to “feminism 101”, where she and other indigenous women—some from the Aboriginal Women’s Action Network (AWAN), of which she is a founding member—act as facilitators to raise awareness and gather information from the community.

“Then we have them set the direction of where our work goes,” she says of AWAN, which has been

a voice for indigenous women in Canada since 1995.

Between her own past and what she has witnessed while working with organizations in the Downtown Eastside, Blaney is no stranger to gendered violence. Having fled the Homalco First Nation at age 13, she is quick to recognize women in similar situations.

“When I worked in the Downtown Eastside Women’s Centre, that’s what I saw: many of these women are ending up here in the Lower Mainland or in other urban centres because they are fleeing violence.”

According to a 2009 government survey, indigenous women are nearly three times more likely to report being a victim of a violent crime. But

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16 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

see next page

Blaney says these incidents often go unreported, especially on reserves.

She recounts the story of her great-aunt, who was sexually assaulted on her family’s reserve in the early 1950s.

“She pressed charges, and the man was incarcerated for five years, but everyone turned against her. At 14, she fled to the Downtown Eastside.”

By 16, she was dead.

Blaney says reactions like the one her aunt’s community had are common and are the direct result of an Indian Act that disempowers women and empowers men. (The act of 1876 defined Indian status based solely on paternal lineage, meaning that if an indigenous woman married a nonindigenous man, or if a woman didn’t know who her father was, she and her children were denied status. Though women could apply for reinstatement after the act was amended through Bill C-31 in 1985, the process was very difficult, and a shortage of government staff meant that many applications were left in limbo.)

“It’s quite contrary to our clan system,” Blaney explains. “In that system, women were the heads, the matriarchs; it was intended that way.”

Now, she says, indigenous women are marginalized not only in dominant society, but in their own communities.

She is quick to point out the collective reluctance to acknowledge violence against women with another case: when the Ontario Native Women’s Association released a report in 1989 on violence within indigenous communities, called Breaking Free, it was shunned by male chiefs.

“They felt sharing the data would be detrimental to our society because it would reinforce the racist imagination that we truly were ‘savages’,” she says. Blaney says that today one doesn’t have to look far to note that Canadian society as a whole continues to see indigenous women in a negative light.

She highlights a recent situation in Val-d’Or, Quebec, where Crown

prosecutors determined that despite 37 files of alleged police abuse, all of which were brought forth by indigenous women, not one of the six accused officers would be charged.

Following the conclusion of the investigation in mid-November, residents of Val-d’Or held a citizen-led march—in support of the police officers.

“That clearly indicates that Canadian society still sees us as dispensable and insignificant,” she says. “It took such courage for them to come forward, and the justice system failed them.”

These patterns of violence, Blaney says, can only be addressed when the federal government looks at the status of indigenous women more seriously.

“It took us [indigenous women] a lot of banging down doors to access the feminist movement, but it’s what I see as absolutely necessary to change our lot in life,” she says.

Through all the violence and suffering, the lifelong activist says it’s those “aha” moments at gatherings that make her work worthwhile: “I’ve had the opportunity to meet with women from all over the country, and they are each struggling in their own ways, so when we’re together and debating issues, it feels good.”

As for Blaney’s priority in 2017, she hopes to have an impact on the inquiry, especially with regard to its Families First initiative, which she says negates a huge segment of the population, including the young indigenous woman who died in a tent in Surrey last month after aging out of the foster-care system.

“Far too many recommendations have been ignored from previous inquiries, and my work is cut out for me to continue to pressure them [commissioners] to bring about meaningful change,” she says. “I hope that before my time is done, I will see a grassroots indigenous women’s movement. Many scoff at the notion of feminism, but they don’t realize that with our clan systems, we really were the original feminists.” -

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NEWS

New Democrats keep open mind on Site C The party’s environment critic, George Heyman, says the public expects “some form of science-based neutral advice” on costly megaprojects > B Y C HA RL IE SM I TH

W

hen George Heyman won the NDP nomination in VancouverFairview before the 2013 B.C. election, it was seen as a victory for the party’s environmental wing. In his previous jobs as executive director of Sierra Club B.C. and president of the B.C. Government and Service Employees’ Union, he frequently stood up for better forest practices and the protection of wilderness areas.

But his environmental advocacy has rubbed some the wrong way. In 2013, Heyman was personally criticized, albeit with his name misspelled, in a pre-election Globe and Mail editorial entitled “Why the NDP are too risky a choice for British Columbians”.

As the NDP critic for the environment, green economy, and technology, Heyman argues that there’s far greater risk to the economy and the environment with the B.C. Liberals’ approach to two megaprojects: the $8.8-billion Site C Dam and the $6.8-billion Kinder Morgan Trans Mountain pipeline.

Vancouver-Fairview NDP MLA George Heyman catches up on environmental news in the Georgia Straight after an interview about his party’s policies.

“Traditionally, people have said we have to find a balance in the choice between the environment and the economy,” he said in a recent interview in the Georgia Straight office.

“But the reality is good economic-

development plans rest on good environmental practices.”

So why was technology included in his critic’s portfolio? Heyman responded that much of the technology sector is focused on finding solutions.

They can come in utilizing resources efficiently to make products to create jobs, and also in technological responses to threats to water quality or the climate.

So when the NDP raises concerns about a project for environmental reasons—such as the Site C Dam or the billion-dollar Kinder Morgan Trans Mountain pipeline—Heyman said that it’s important to put forward alternatives that can build the economy and create jobs.

“In the case of Site C, our PowerBC proposal focuses on a provincewide energy-conservation program, starting with public buildings, moving on to commercial and residential, and talking about taking advantage of rapidly improving renewable-energy technologies in wind and solar— that also have very steeply dropping prices,” he said.

The Site C Dam is the third major B.C. energy project to be built along the Peace River, after the W.A.C. Bennett Dam and the Peace Canyon Dam. According to B.C. Hydro, it will be completed in 2024, providing enough electricity

for 450,000 homes each year.

Heyman noted that the Joint Review Panel, which evaluated the project, concluded that Site C would lose $200 million per year for at least the first four years of operation. And that’s if the $8.8-billion cost estimate is accurate.

“People are saying that Site C may come in anywhere from $3 billion to $4 billion higher than the $9-billion price tag, which is already a hike from when it was first approved,” he declared. “We can do better than that for taxpayers. We can do better than that for Hydro ratepayers. And we can do better than that to create long-lasting, good-paying jobs in every community around British Columbia over the next one to two decades.”

Heyman and other New Democrats have demanded that the B.C. Liberal government subject the project to an independent review by the provincial energy regulator, the B.C. Utilities Commission. Opposition MLAs say this is necessary to determine if other forms of renewable energy are more cost-efficient and see page 20

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The Site C Dam will create an 83-kilometre-long reservoir in the Peace River Valley, flooding prime agricultural land to generate power for 450,000 homes.

New Democrats

from page 18

create greater employment.

“We are seeing prices drop in solar and wind [power],” Heyman stated. “We’re seeing technologies grow more efficient. There’s a great possibility for geothermal energy in British Columbia. That’s never been adequately reviewed by B.C. Hydro.”

B.C. Hydro has pointed out on its website that “more than $100 million in procurement opportunities has been committed to Aboriginal companies” in such areas as clearing, site preparation, roads, bridges, grassseed supply, wetland mitigation, and environmental monitoring.

Meanwhile, the Prophet River and West Moberly First Nations have filed legal challenges in the Federal Court of Appeal and the B.C. Court of Appeal against the federal and provincial governments’ environmental approvals.

Heyman stopped short of saying that his party will cancel the Site C Dam if it forms the government after the May 9, 2017, provincial election.

“I think British Columbians would expect us to do due diligence and not substitute one political decision for another,” he said. “I think in the case of energy policy and environmental concerns, generally, the public expects some form of science-based

neutral advice to government that’s transparent and publicly available so decisions that are made can be evaluated. And we will provide that.”

He also maintained that Premier Christy Clark has said that she wants construction on the dam to go “past the point of no return” before the election.

“She may well have planted some poison pills,” he acknowledged. “But we made an absolute commitment to put that project in its current form in May to the B.C. Utilities Commission. It would need a robust terms of reference and an expedited review— and compare Site C and the committed costs of Site C as they exist at that point with the lost economic opportunity through a more incremental distributed-energy-production system made up of renewables.”

In addition, Heyman said the review should also consider the costs of the loss of prime agricultural land from the flooding of parts of the Peace River Valley, as well as the impacts on First Nations.

“If that review says that looking at all the factors, we should move in a different direction, [NDP Leader] John Horgan has said as recently as last week that that is advice we should follow,” Heyman emphasized. “But he can’t commit until he sees the advice.” -

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20 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 21

Will Christy Clark’s housing gambit pay off?

P

remier Christy Clark has surprised her opponents and confounded housing experts with another major intervention into the real-estate market. But will it pay off big-time in the next B.C. election, scheduled for May 9, 2017?

On December 15, the premier announced that buyers can borrow up to $37,500 interest-free for five years toward a down payment on their first home. After that point, the homeowner will have to start paying interest.

The program is only available to Canadian citizens and permanent residents who have lived in the country for five years.

The entire loan cannot exceed five percent of the purchase price and will have to be paid off within 25 years.

It came four months after Clark introduced a 15-percent tax on forPremier Christy Clark’s offer of five-year interest-free loans to first-time buyers eign buyers of residential real estate encountered skepticism from economists, but not from the real-estate industry. in the Lower Mainland.

The B.C. NDP immediately con- of Business, and two other economists start,” UDI president and CEO Anne McMullin said in a news release. demned the latest announcement, who spoke to Global B.C. Davidoff maintained that it will “With applications for the program accusing Clark of doing nothing while prices shot up during the past lead to higher housing prices because starting in January, what a way to ring it will increase demand in a supply- in 2017 for first-time homebuyers.” two years.

The B.C. Real Estate Association “Now, instead of taking action to fix constrained market. As a result, the inthe problem by increasing the supply terest-free loans will fatten the bottom also cheered the government’s decilines of developers. sion to grant interest-free loans for of affordable housIn the past, down payments. The BCREA cited a ing, Christy Clark similar criticisms 2015 study by economic consultants thinks that first have been lev- Altus Group that determined, on avertime homebuyers Charlie Smith elled against the age, that a Multiple Listing Service should get two mortgages instead of one,” NDP hous- B.C. government’s rent-supplement transaction results in almost $63,000 ing critic David Eby said in a party program. One housing activist, Jean in additional expenditures in B.C. And there is where some of the news release. “Christy Clark’s plan Swanson, has claimed that landlords for first-time home buyers doesn’t do are the major beneficiaries in a sup- political benefit lies for the premier.

Not only will Clark appear to be anything to help affordability. Instead, ply-constrained market.

The Urban Development Institute, helping first-time homebuyers but it puts young people who are already facing record levels of debt further into which is an association of developers, she has also given a shot in the arm debt, while rewarding developers and applauded the premier’s announce- to mortgage brokers, notaries pubspeculators, many of whom are big ment of interest-free loans. According lic, real-estate lawyers, real-estate to the UDI, this could provide finan- agents, and all the others who benefit donors to the B.C. Liberal party.” from a brisk housing market.

The premier’s move was also cing to about 42,000 B.C. residents.

“This down-payment support from However, it remains to be seen slammed by Tom Davidoff, a realestate expert at UBC’s Sauder School the provincial government is a great how much impact this will have in

Commentary

light of new federal rules around mortgages.

All homebuyers, regardless of down payment, must face a “mortgage stress test”. And no more than 39 percent of household income can go toward gross debt-servicing (mortgage payments, heat, and taxes). The total debt-service ratio (carrying costs and other debt payments) must not exceed 44 percent of household income.

The Altus Group report covered the years from 2012 to 2014, when the B.C. housing market was heating up in a low-interest-rate environment.

The analysis concluded that new owners of Canadian resale homes spend about $9,500 per year on renovations in the three years following their purchase.

“In addition, there are also significant expenditures for furniture and appliances and general household purchases such as bedding, towels, lighting fixtures, tools, blinds, etc.,” the report noted.

Then there are the moving costs, as well as insurance.

“B.C. experiences the highest relative job impact of any province,” the Altus Group declared. “MLS home sales and purchases in B.C. generate 32,960 direct and indirect jobs—nearly 1 in 70 jobs across the entire B.C. economy, much higher than the national average of 1 in 104 jobs.”

This study reflected how important housing sales are to the B.C. economy, something that is often not mentioned in media reports about this industry.

Clark knows that if interest-free loans keep the real-estate market afloat until after the May 9 provincial election, she will be in a better position to remain premier for another four years.

And she’s not going to lose any sleep if a few economists pooh-pooh the idea in the media.

A key aspect is the five-year term for interest-free loans.

This means that first-time buyers who jump into the market will still be avoiding paying interest on these loans come the provincial election in May 2021.

So you can consider this a twoelection-cycle policy pronouncement.

B.C. elections are won or lost in the outer suburbs of Vancouver, such as Coquitlam, Maple Ridge, and Surrey, where there’s an abundance of firsttime buyers.

They’re also won and lost in places like Prince George, Kamloops, Quesnel, and Williams Lake, where many home-owning voters worry about their children ever being able to afford to buy. In many cases, the parents will be let off the hook from having to lend money to their kids to purchase a home.

If Clark’s B.C. Liberals retain power with a narrow victory next May, it may well have happened because of yesterday’s announcement.

Clark’s move is reminiscent of a former NDP premier, Glen Clark, giving voters a cheque from ICBC shortly before the 1996 election.

At the time, the populist NDP premier came under criticism from experts and the opposition for trying to buy votes.

But Glen Clark didn’t care. He was really interested in scooping up socalled “low-information voters” who don’t pay attention to the issues.

Similarly, Christy Clark’s announcement also appeals to lowinformation voters who are sometimes so busy raising kids that they tune out provincial politics until shortly before going to the polls.

No politician ever wants to admit publicly that he or she is giving away public money to woo low-information voters.

But these policies can prove to be very potent tools on election day, particularly for populist politicians who never underestimate the gullibility of the public. -

BEST REAL ESTATE AGENT WINNER 2010-2016 “Let’s Have an Eggnog and Talk Real Estate”

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BOOKS

Regulatory bite would give news we deserve RE VIEW THE NEWS WE DESERVE

By Marc Edge. New Star, 224 pp, softcover

Sometimes, the best nonfic-

2 tion books are written with

palpable anger at the injustice of the world. Readers can sense when there’s a fiery passion driving the author’s desire to tell a story. These books don’t tiptoe around unpleasant realities; rather, they stare them in the face with an honesty that can border on recklessness.

Richmond author Marc Edge’s The News We Deserve: The Transformation of Canada’s Media Landscape meets this standard. The professor of media and communication at University Canada West in Vancouver is an old hand at dissecting the woes of Canadian daily newspapers.

Three of his previous books addressed the greedy and sometimes seedy ways in which newspaper monopolists have played readers for schmucks. The first, Pacific Press: The Unauthorized Story of Vancouver’s Newspaper Monopoly, exposed the inner workings of a company that employed him for nearly 20 years as a journalist. His second book on the media, Asper Nation: Canada’s Most Dangerous Media Company, described how a Winnipeg-based family turned a national chain of newspapers into a mouthpiece for their favourite political causes, including the state of Israel and bashing the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation, while silencing those of different viewpoints.

A more recent book, Greatly Exaggerated: The Myth of the Death of Newspapers, revealed how publishing barons across North America exploited bankruptcy laws to generate great returns on their investments while pleading poverty.

Edge’s newest book, The News We Deserve, might be his most ambitious undertaking. Building on his previous work on the financialization of the newspaper industry, it shows how media companies have expanded their dominance and undermined Canadian journalism through takeovers that have led to the disappearance of thousands of jobs.

This happened under the eyes of Canadian regulators and federal politicians who steadfastly ignored how other countries, such as New Zealand and Australia, were preventing media moguls from doing the same thing.

So why were Canadian politicians so willing to allow corporate behemoths like Bell, Quebecor, Postmedia, and Rogers to gobble up smaller players? Edge reveals a complicated story linked to Stephen Harper’s rise to the

office of prime minister, a weak-kneed Competition Bureau, the marginalization of a report by a committee chaired by former Liberal MP Clifford Lincoln, and savvy tactics employed by media giants to get their takeovers approved.

According to Edge, an important factor was “greenmail endowments”, also known as public-benefits packages, which are supposed to represent about 10 percent of the purchase price.

At least 85 percent of these payments “should support” Canadian programming, according to the Canadian Radio-television and Telecommunications Commission.

Corporations offered these to the federal broadcast regulator in return for being permitted to take over smaller companies like CHUM and Alliance Atlantis.

On the surface, this seemed like a good deal for Canadians: hand over a big chunk of change in return for being allowed to buy radio and television stations. However, Edge documents how these public benefits have also financed the Canadian Media Research Consortium—which conducts research into economic, technical, and cultural aspects of media—and university journalism schools, whose faculty might otherwise have blown the whistle on the dangers of corporate concentration in the media.

Lo and behold, some of these faculty—such as the founding director of the UBC school of journalism and president of the CMRC, Donna Logan—became public advocates for “media convergence”. In The News We Deserve, Edge reproduces a letter that Logan wrote to the CRTC saying it’s a “myth” and “ludicrous” that media mergers result in fewer voices.

It’s one of many examples cited by Edge to advance his argument that postsecondary journalism education has been captured by corporations.

In one of the book’s most fascinating sections, Edge also explores the concept of “regulatory capture”.

“According to media scholar Robert Horwitz, this occurs when a regulatory agency ‘systematically favors the private interests of regulated parties and systematically ignores the public interest’,” Edge writes. “The public interest becomes ‘perverted’ as a regulator matures through several phases.”

Th roughout his career as a journalist and as a scholar, Edge has proven that he’s not susceptible to being captured by anyone. And his incendiary and subversive research should be of particular interest to residents of Western Canada, where three-quarters of daily newspaper circulation is controlled by one company, Postmedia, mostly owned

by U.S hedge funds.

GASTOWN RETAILERS OPEN BOXING DAY:

Tees.ca: 227 Abbott St. The Basement: 235 Cambia St. The Block: 350 W. Cordova St. The Good Spirit: 309 Cambia St. The Latest Scoop: 159 Water St.

017 Shop: 302 W. Cordova St. Aesop: 19 Water St. Ammolite Museum: 313 Water St. Angel Vancouver: 2 Powell St. Army & Navy Dept. Store: 36 W. Cordova St. Artemisia: 452 W. Cordova St. Cappelleria Bertacchi Italian Hat Crafter: 207 Abbott St. C&K: 375 Water St. Durant Sessions: 315 W. Cordova St. Dutil: 303 W. Cordova St. E:CLE: 486 W. Cordova St. Frank & Oak: 316 W. Cordova St. Haven: 52 E. Cordova St. Honey Gifts: 350 Water St. Jade: 375 Water St. John Fluevog: 65 Water St. Kit + Ace: 151 Water St. L’Atelier Home: 452 W. Cordova St. La Differencia: 131 Water St. Livestock Special Engagements: 239 Abbott St. Lululemon lab: 50 Powell St. LYNNsteven: 225 Carrall St. m0851: 44 Water St. Menu: 114 Water St. Motherland: 466 W. Cordova St. Neighbour Men: 125 – 12 Water St. Neighbour Women: 45 Powell St. New World Design: 306 W. Cordova St. Nicole Bridger: 14 Water St. Niftydo: 227 Carrall St. Nouvelle Nouvelle: 209 Abbott St. O.K. Boot Corral: 205 Carrall St. Oak & Fort: 355 Water St. Old Faithful: 320 W. Cordova St. One of a Few: 354 Water St. Orling & Wu: 28 Water St. Poppy & Rye: 131 Water St. Roden Gray: 8 Water St. Rowan Sky: 334 W. Cordova St. Silver Gallery: 308 Water St. Six Hundred Four: 123 Cambie St. Strike MVMNT: 299 Columbia St. Stussy: 49 Powell St.

@MYGASTOWN

GASTOWN RESTAURANTS OPEN BOXING DAY:

131 Water Kitchen & Bar: 131 Water St. Al Porto: 321 Water St. Brioche: 401 W. Cordova St. Guu Otokomae: 375 Water St. La Casita: 101 W. Cordova St. MeeT in Gastown: 12 Water St. Momo Sushi: 375 Water St. Old Spaghetti Factory: 53 Water St. Peckinpah: 2 Water St. Pourhouse: 162 Water St. Sitar: 8 Powell St. Six Acres: 203 Carrall St. The Black Frog: 108 Cambie St. The Flying Pig: 102 Water St. The Irish Heather: 210 Carrall St. Water Street Café: 300 Water St.

GASTOWN COFFEE SHOPS OPEN BOXING DAY:

Bambo: 301 W. Cordova St. Buro Espresso Bar: 356 Water St. Coffeebar: 10 Water St. David’s Tea: 164 Water St. Milano Espresso Lounge: 36 Powell St. Nelson The Seagull: 315 Carrall St. Starbucks: 199 Water St. The Birds & The Beets: 55 Powell St. Timbertrain: 311 W. Cordova St.

GASTOWN PUBS/BARS OPEN BOXING DAY: Bourbon: 50 W. Cordova St. Lamplighter: 92 Water St. Steamworks: 375 Water St. The Blarney Stone: 216 Carrall St. The Charles Bar: 136 W. Cordova St.

Get the inside scoop on restaurants, shopping and events at www.gastown.org.

FACEBOOK/MYGASTOWN

@GASTOWN

> CHARLIE SMITH

BETTER THAN BOXING DAY

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Offer(s) available on select new 2016/2017 models through participating dealers to qualified retail customers who take delivery from December 1, 2016 to January 3, 2017. Dealers may sell or lease for less. Some conditions apply. See dealer for complete details. Vehicles shown may include optional accessories and upgrades available at extra cost. All offers are subject to change without notice. All pricing includes delivery and destination fees up to $1,740, $22 AMVIC, $100 A/C charge (where applicable). Excludes taxes, licensing, PPSA, registration, insurance, variable dealer administration fees, fuel-fill charges up to $100, and down payment (if applicable and unless otherwise specified). Other lease and financing options also available. Don’t Pay Until Spring (120-Day Payment Deferral) applies to purchase financing only on approved credit on all new 2016/2017 models at participating Kia dealers. No interest will accrue during the first 90 days of the finance contract. After this period, interest starts to accrue and the purchaser will repay the principal and interest monthly over the term of the contract which will be extended by 90 days. Offer ends January 3, 2017. Representative Financing Example: Financing offer on a new 2016 Soul EX AT (S0754G) with a selling price of $22,557, including $500 Holiday Bonus† equals $62/week for 84 months, for a total of 364 payments, at 0% with $0 down payment. Cost of borrowing is $0 and total obligation is $22,557. †No purchase necessary. Holiday bonus between $500 and $2,000 (including guaranteed $500 discount) awarded in dealership. Approximate odds of winning an incremental bonus prize of $250 -$1,500 at a participating dealership in the Western region are as follows: $750 total Holiday Bonus (including guaranteed $500 discount): approx. odds of winning: 1:4; $1,000 total Holiday Bonus (including guaranteed $500 discount): approx. odds of winning: 1:5; $1,250 total Holiday Bonus (including guaranteed $500 discount): approx. odds of winning: 1:10; $1,500 total Holiday Bonus (including guaranteed $500 discount): approx. odds of winning: 1:10; $2,000 total Holiday Bonus (including guaranteed $500 discount): approx. odds of winning: 1:1282. Contest open to Canadian residents over the age of majority. Skill-testing question required. Discount prizes must be redeemed by January 3, 2017. See dealer or kia.ca/special-offers for complete contest details. *Cash Purchase Price for the new 2016 Optima LX AT (OP741G) is $20,877 and includes a cash discount of $4,000 and $500 Holiday Bonus†. Cash discounts vary by model and trim and are deducted from the negotiated selling price before taxes. &Representative Leasing Example: Lease offer available on approved credit (OAC), on the 2017 Sorento 2.4L LX FWD (SR75AH)/2017 Forte LX MT (F0541H)/2017 Sportage LX FWD (SP751H) with a selling price of $29,557/$17,077/$26,757 is based on 156/260/156 weekly payments of $69/$39/$57 for 36/60/36 months at 0%/0.9%/0%, with $0 security deposit, $2,375/$995/$1,800 down payment and first payment due at lease inception. Offer includes $500 Holiday Bonus† and $500/$0/$0 lease credit. Total lease obligation is $10,824/$10,262/$8,951 with the option to purchase at the end of the term for $15,358/$5,799/$15,506. Lease has 16,000 km/yr allowance (other packages available and $0.12/km for excess kilometres). ‡Model shown Manufacturer Suggested Retail Price for 2016 Optima SX AT Turbo (OP746G)/2017 Sorento SX Turbo AWD (SR75IH)/2017 Forte SX AT (FO747H)/2017 Sportage SX Turbo AWD (SP757H) is $35,195/$42,495/$27,295/$39,595.The Bluetooth® wordmark and logo are registered trademarks and are owned by Bluetooth SIG, Inc. The 2016 Sportage received the lowest number of problems per 100 vehicles among Small SUVs in the J.D. Power 2016 U.S. Initial Quality Study. 2016 study based on 80,157 total responses, evaluating 245 models, and measures the opinions of new 2016 vehicle owners after 90 days of ownership, surveyed in February-May 2016. Your experiences may vary. Visit jdpower.com. Government 5-Star Safety Ratings are part of the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration’s (NHTSA’s) New Car Assessment Program (www.SaferCar.gov). #When properly equipped. Do not exceed any weight ratings and follow all towing instructions in your Owner’s Manual. Information in this advertisement is believed to be accurate at the time of printing. For more information on our 5-year warranty coverage, visit kia.ca or call us at 1-877-542-2886. Kia is a trademark of Kia Motors Corporation. DL#30460.

4.8 97% RECOMMENDED 82 LIFETIME REVIEWS

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 23

FEATURE

How Vancouverites celebrate the holidays

T

here are as many ways to spend the holidays as there are fascinating pockets of Vancouver.

We asked some well-known residents what their traditions are, and what we found out—amid the peppermint-schnapps hot chocolate, old-movie marathons, and rum balls—was that no two spend the season quite the same.

Here, politicians, personalities, a musician, a brewer, chefs, and more share their holiday secrets.

Watermelon cooks a goose (Amanda Siebert photo), brewmaster Kevin Emms samples beer, and Kevin “Sipreano” Howes helps the poor (Digital Drum photo).

MARY JEAN “WATERMELON” Laplander boy discovers the dark truth DUNDSON Legendary cookie dealer, owner of the about Santa Claus. As evil omens begin to appear, he rallies the adults around Commercial Drive Licorice Parlour him that he can convince to help him I love the East Van Panto and go every intervene before Santa comes for all year. The panto is such a great pro- the children. My tradition is to watch duction because it appeals equally to this in the early hours, so it is dark and children and adults. I belly-laugh at it quiet outside and the only light is from every year, which is rare (belly-laugh- the Christmas tree beside the couch. ing, that is). For Christmas every year, Then with foolish abandon I tuck into I also have a staff party where I cook a seasonal beery delights such as cellargoose and all the trimmings. Like, I’m aged Driftwood Singularity, Granville straight out of a Charles Dickens novel! Island Barley Wine, and Strange Fellows’ Krampus because, well, that’s the FARID ROHANI perfect beer for the occasion.

Past chair, Laurier Institution

An atheist, Buddhist, Christian, Jew, Muslim, Zoroastrian, and Baha’i walk into a house on Christmas Eve and see a decorated tree. They look at each other, hug each other, and thank Canada for the blessings that have allowed us to come together, be free, and love each other and live as one family. That is our tradition as a family for the last 30 years—a true Canadian family— and all that matters is not to look at what divides us but rather what unites us: our love for each other.

KEVIN EMMS Brewmaster at Granville Island Brewing

nature. We volunteer with local Buddhist charities to deliver Christmas care packages to homeless shelters, attend the Japanese language school’s Christmas party, and [have] family Christmas dinners at Chinese restaurants. At home we roast a turkey but our stuffing is sticky rice, shitake mushrooms, and dried sweet Chinese sausages. Plenty of old, corny black-and-white movies, preferably musicals like Footlight Parade or Top Hat, make us laugh after a long hard year at work and school.

CLEMENT CHAN Owner and executive chef at Torafuku and Le Tigre

During the holidays, I always like to spend as much time with my family and friends as possible, as well as cook up a feast—not just turkey, but other dishes such as duck and sticky rice.

I also like to hit up all the holiday events with my wife. We just went to the new Enchant recently and it was definitely a great way to get into the festive spirit.

MELISSA DE GENOVA NPA city councillor

I dedicate a whole day in December to A few years back I was introduced to baking. I enjoy packaging tins of homea Finnish movie called Rare Exports: made holiday confections for family, A Christmas Tale, in which a young friends, and neighbours. The recipes

have been passed down to me from my mother and grandmothers. The handsdown favourite and most requested is a special family recipe for rum balls.

(I make many batches and my kitchen looks like a small factory!) Of course, the holiday would not be complete without a visit to Bright Nights Christmas Train in Stanley Park!

JACKIE KAI ELLIS Owner at Beaucoup Bakery

Being of Chinese heritage, we celebrated the New Year’s much more than the holidays, so it was a perfect opportunity to create my own holiday traditions as I grew older: picking a tree from the lot and having my home filled with the scent of spruce; sipping hot chocolate while shopping for holiday gifts; and quiet Christmas mornings, finding a bright orange at the bottom of my stocking. But among my favourite traditions, holiday baking was at the top. I was always sure to include everyone’s personal favourite in my cookie gift boxes and loved when receiving the boxes became a part of their holiday tradition, too.

Owner and pastry chef at Thomas Haas Chocolates & Patisserie

Our busiest time of the year is Christmas. Starting on the first of November, our chocolate production goes through the roof and our team begins the 16-hour days leading up to Christmas. I like to lay low on Christmas Day with family and spend the day recovering from a crazy season at our shops. My wife, Lisa, and I traditionally host an open house with our KEVIN “SIPREANO” HOWES friends and neighbours on Boxing Day. We cook, bake, eat stollen, and Producer, Voluntary in Nature make cappuccinos all day long.

When my mother died from breast cancer in 1999, holidays like Christ- LAUREN MOTE mas were never the same. It all seemed Bar manager at UVA Wine & Cocktail somewhat meaningless. Growing up Bar and co-owner of Bittered Sling in the ’70s and ’80s, my family would start our Christmas mornings with Every year, we host an orphans’ Pillsbury cinnamon rolls, exchange holiday party at our place: a comgifts, and help prepare a dinner with all fortable and happy space to relax, of the fixings. I was so lucky and priv- pig out, and be with friends. In ileged. Today, I am disgusted with the addition to that, my husband, Jonacrass commercialization of the season, than, and I always throw a Bittered but try and focus on the food, friends, Sling Bistro pop-up restaurant for and family part of the equation while our clients to attend. It’s usually doing anything that I can to help those an all-out bonanza of festive food less fortunate. Like my parents taught and beverage, where we collaborate with other chefs and bartenders, me, it’s always best to give. and this year will be no different.

MARK B. HUGHES MARC BLAQUIERE Comedian

I’m not a fan of Christmas—not in a Scrooge way, exactly, more in the if-communism-befell-Canada-andthey-outlawed-it-for-being-subversive-I-wouldn’t-care kind of way. But my parents love it. So my tradition every year is to find an excuse to get out of having to go to Christmas dinKERRY JANG ner, or at the very least, to leave early.

Usually, this means volunteering Vision Vancouver city councillor somewhere or visiting someone who Our holiday tradition is to take part in doesn’t have family or whatever. I’m an eclectic assortment of events reflect- such an asshole that I exploit volunive of our city’s diverse intercultural teering to avoid my family!

STRAIGHT WRAPPED

THOMAS HAAS

for the

Member of Jerk in the Can, and barber at Uptown Barber

Every year on Christmas morning, my wife, Jessica, and myself like to play dress-up. Jessica is sexy Mrs. Claus and I am bad-boy Santa. We share a gift with each other, and then make sweet love under the Christmas tree while our cat Betty plays inside one of the empty boxes. With great passion, we moan all the reindeer names and all the games they played.

Tradition since the day we met, on December 24, 2010. Believe that! -

HOLIDAYS for

for the

Gifts That Keep Giving

Style

Sophistication & Service

THE KINK KIT The Kink Kit by Spartacus is a fab black and gold collection that includes all the basics for a kinky evening. Or morning. Whatever floats your boat.

Includes pretty leather cuffs, gold clamps, a leather slapper, and a leather blindfold.

Womyns' Ware Inc. 896 Commercial Drive,Vancouver, BC. www.womynsware.com

THE SMART WAND The Smart Wand is a luxurious massager for all parts of your body, even your shoulders! With deep rumbling vibration ranging from light to very intense, this silent waterproof rechargeable vibrator has an innovative SenseTouch feature that mimics actual massage.

Womyns' Ware Inc. 896 Commercial Drive,Vancouver www.womynsware.com

24 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

for the

Fashion -ista

GO BOLD WITH DESIGUAL STYLE Shop Vancouver’s first Desigual boutique at Angel in Gastown.

Desigual is from Barcelona, and the winter collection for men, women, and kids is 20 to 50 percent off.

Angel 2 Powell Street 604.681.0947 angelvancouver.com

DOCTORS OF OPTOMETRY Shop hand-selected frames from independent companies that emphasize bespoke design, exceptional style, and excellent workmanship. West 10th Eyes' optometrists perform eye exams with the most advanced technology, and can fit difficult prescriptions.

Extended health benefits?

Remember to use it or lose it!

West 10th Eyes 4357 West 10th Ave. west10theyes.com 604.224.2322

STRAIGHT WRAPPED for the

Art Enthusiast

for the

HOLIDAYS

for the

Gift of DanceHouse

Give the gift of dance this year. Last presented by DanceHouse in 2013, Les Ballets Jazz de Montréal (BJM) returns to Vancouver this February with a triple bill. Powerful music, mass movements, sensuality, and frenzy. BJM presents the contagious energy of three original dance pieces.

Tickets from $35 dancehouse.ca

for the

Artist

Give the Gift of Membership This holiday season, treat your loved ones to a year of incredible art experiences including unlimited admission to exhibitions, exclusive invitations to members openings, a members-only newsletter, a discount at the gallery store, and much, much more. Purchase a gift of membership before December 31 and receive an additional month of membership, plus a bonus complimentary guest pass to the gallery.

ART CLASSES FOR ADULTS AND TEENS AT THE ARTWAY STUDIOS Get creative with your gift giving and give the gift of art. The ArtWay is offering a range of classes for adults and teens in mixed media, drawing, and oil painting for both experienced artists and total beginners.

$375.00 for 3 hours a week, 8 weeks.

Vancouver Art Gallery 750 Hornby Street www.vanartgallery.bc.ca

The ArtWay Studios 649 E 15th Ave, Vancouver 604.569.1567 www.theartway.ca

for the

for the

Canucks Foodie Fan

JOHNNY PLAID SHIRT FOR MEN AND WOMEN Cozy up during the holiday season with the Johnny Plaid shirt, exclusively at the Canucks Team Store.

Priced at $89.99 at 800 Griffiths Way, Vancouver, BC V6B 6G1

for the

Bold

CANUCKS HOLIDAY TICKET PACK Pick three Canucks games, and get fantastic bonus gifts, including FlyOver Canada passes, Canucks SuperSkills tickets, and a limited-edition Canucks scarf to put under the tree.

Canucks Holiday Ticket Packs are starting from $249

Canucks.com/HolidayPacks or call 604.670.5087

and the

AUTHENTIC SCOTTISH BUTTER SHORTBREAD GIFT TINS

Beautiful

These festive tins packed with shortbread cookies make an awesome hostess gift on the fly. Made with real butter the traditional Scottish way, these delicious cookies are great for gifting or holiday snacking.

One of Vancouver's best-kept secrets is in Kerrisdale. Shop Theo and other eclectic European collections that are beautifully curated at The Optical Boutique.

Various prices up to $20 from Urban Fare www.urbanfare.com

The Optical Boutique 2265 West 41st Ave Vancouver BC 604-261-9412 www.theopticalboutique.com

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 25

GREEN LIVING

Classes offer an educational gift alternative > BY L UC Y LA U

I

f you’re feeling uneasy about the tonnes of material goods that are typically purchased, wrapped, and tossed at this time of year, why not ditch the mall altogether and give the gift of an invaluable experience instead? From Middle Eastern– and Italian-inspired cooking classes to woodworking programs, there are plenty of DIY and skill-building sessions in Vancouver where your recipient can pick up a new craft, strengthen a hobby, or spend some good ol’ QT with the gift-giver should you also nab a seat for yourself.

Below, we’ve rounded up a few of our favourite DIY classes and workshops in the city, each with its own green twist. The best part is that spots may be reserved online, so you can complete your last-minute shopping in a snap.

ADULT COOKING CLASS Whether

your giftee is in dire need of a culinary crash course or simply interested in upping his or her gastronomic repertoire, a cooking class at Nourish Vancouver (3742 West 10th Avenue) can help. The organic, plant-based shop— which also operates eat-in and catering services—emphasizes social responsibility and environmental sustainability in its dishes, so you can expect the same from its workshops.

For the New Year, Nourish will be offering a range of sessions focused on specific cuisines, such as the Middle Eastern–inspired Ottolenghi Effect, where attendees will cook up plates like garlic-roasted chicken and homemade hummus, and Hearty, Rustic, and Italian, which boasts a menu of gnocchi and Neapolitan-style pizza dough made from scratch. All classes are vegetarian- and vegan-friendly, and run for two-and-a-half hours on various dates throughout 2017. Seats are $95 each at nourishvancouver.ca/ .

CANDLE- OR SOAP-MAKING LESSON Forget the potentially harm-

nab a seat in one of the Wood Shop’s (251 Southern Street) DIY sessions.

The local startup makes polished furnishings and dĂŠcor pieces using salvaged wood sourced from across the city. During an eight-hour day, attendees will be able to construct their own reclaimed-wood table or storage trunk while learning how to work a drill, screw gun, belt sander, and more from the on-site carpenter.

Upcycling and woodworking techniques will also be taught and all participants will finish with a furniture or dĂŠcor product that fits their desired style and measurements. Completed objects may be brought home immediately following the class or delivered later that week. Classes start at $160 and take place on various dates throughout January and February. Register at woodshop.coop/.

MEAD-MAKING CLASS Mead may

INDIGO DYE CLASS Explore the ancient art of indigo dyeing—a natural process that’s most commonly associated with denim colouring today—at East Vancouver’s Soigne Jewelry, Art & Crafts (393 Powell Street). Run by local artist and craftswoman Beata Kacy, the classes introduce participants to the techniques of itajime: folding, stitching, and wrapping, which produce one-of-a-kind patterns on various textiles.

Students will work cotton napkins and an indigo-dye vat to create their own blue-washed dĂŠcor items to bring home. The workshops take place on January 12, from 6 p.m. to 8:30 p.m., and January 29 from 11 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Seats are on promotion for $60 each at soigne.ca/blog/. Soigne also hosts a range of other DIY classes, including Skin Fitness, where attendees craft nourishing skin products using organic ingredients, and Feather Extravaganza, where you can make your own earrings or hair piece with natural, ethically sourced feathers. -

ful, mass-produced candles from the big-box shops and learn how to make your own nontoxic, biodegradable soywax lights at home. Conducted by the founders of plant-based skincare line the Good Oak, each class walks guests through the steps in an all-natural candle-making process.

Soap-making workshops are also offered, where students learn the ins and outs of the cold-process method and the advantages of organic ingredients like essential oils.

Attendees finish each class with a handmade candle or bar of soap and knowledge of how to design their own recipes at home. Candlemaking sessions are $25 a seat and soap-making is $60 a seat. Interested participants should email the goodoaksoap@gmail.com.

Drop-in classes at pottery studios allow students to learn the art of creating handmade goods with the advice and guidance of experienced professionals.

DROP-IN POTTERY CLASS There’s

a certain pride that comes with serving your guests—or devouring a personal-sized pizza—from a dish you’ve crafted using your bare hands, no matter how wonky it looks. (Plus, you get to answer any “where did you get that?� inquiries with a smug “I made it myself!�) Luckily, Vancouver has no shortage of talented ceramists and many are more than willing to share tricks of the trade.

For those looking to get down and dirty with some clay, studios like HiDe ceramic works (2368 Alberta Street) and JustPotters (1803 East 1st Avenue) offer drop-in pottery classes where you can get acquainted with the art under the guidance of a well-trained professional. Sessions start at $35 and participants leave with their own handmade ramen bowl, coffee mug, pasta plate, vase, or whatever else they can dream up. Reserve your spot at hideart.com/ or justpotters.com/.

SASHIKO STITCHING CLASS Knowing your way around a needle and thread isn’t just handy for unexpected wardrobe malfunctions; it’s also an effective way to prevent damaged clothing from prematurely hitting landfills.

If the person on your list failed to pick up the skill during high-school home ec, sign him or her up for a sashiko stitching class at Mount Pleasant’s Collage Collage (3697 Main Street).

Conducted by local textile designer Heather Young, the workshop will teach attendees the arts of boro and sashiko—two Japanese mending techniques—as well as quilting. Students will walk away with a handmade potholder, plus knowledge of the running stitch and the patterns and repairs it can make. Participants are also welcome to bring in a piece of clothing that they can mend during the class.

The session takes place on February 25 from 2 p.m. to 5 p.m. Seats are $90 each at shop.collagecollage.ca/ .

BOXING WEEK SPECIALS December 26 th - 31 st

CLEARANCE SAVE SALE UP TO

50%

Thursday, December 29th is

SENIORS’ DAY

Save

10

%

*

on regular priced merchandise

Visit tisol.ca for a location near you Limited quantities available. While supplies last. Available at Tisol locations December 26th - 31st, 2016. Visit tisol.ca for store hours. *Discounts apply to regular priced merchandise on Seniors’ Day only. Must be at least 60 years of age to qualify for the discount. Excludes sale items, adoption fees, gift cards and license fees. Not combinable with other offers. Tisol Pet Nutrition & Supply Stores has the right to change the date of Seniors’ Day without notice. Ask a Pet Expert for details.

26 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

be best associated with Old English lit and episodes of Game of Thrones, but the ancient beverage—also known as honey wine—has experienced a comeback in recent years. Send your favourite wine-o to Homestead Junction (649 East Hastings Street), where he or she will learn how to make a batch of mead from start to finish.

Led by local grape enthusiast Stuart Morris, the workshop provides those with zero winemaking experience the tools they need to get comfortable with the craft. Attendees will be able to reap the probiotic and antioxidant properties of locally sourced honey in the five palatable bottles they bring home. The class takes place on January 15 from 11:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. Seats are $50 each at homesteadjunction.ca/.

DIY SHOP CLASS Environmentally

minded names on your Nice list—and those in need of some sturdy, wellcrafted home items—will be stoked to

.

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Carfentanil suspected in overdose deaths

L

ast Thursday (December 15), nine approximately 100 times more toxic. people died of a suspected drug overIn a telephone interview, Dr. William dose in Vancouver. By the end of the Schreiber, medical director of the Provincial weekend that followed, the Vancouver Toxicology Centre, told the Georgia Straight Police Department had found another seven that testing for carfentanil is far more complipeople dead of suspected overdoses. A total of cated than many people might think.

16 people died in just four days.

“I wish that we looked like the people in CSI, The unprecedented number prompted the B.C. I wish we had their work hours, and I wish Coroners Service to issue an “urgent” warning we got paid like they do, but it’s not quite the for drug users, asking them same,” he said. to exercise extreme caution, Schreiber noted that especially in Vancouver’s the Provincial Toxicology Downtown Eastside.

Centre, where the coroners Travis Lupick “We are not sure what has service sends samples from caused this very distressing spike in fatalities,” suspected overdoses, presently does not know chief coroner Lisa Lapointe said in that release. how to test for carfentanil.

“It will take detailed toxicology testing and He said it will likely be “two to three further investigation to try to determine that.” months” before the lab can develop such a proIt could be some time before authorities are cess and put it into routine use. able to determine exactly what killed so many Schreiber explained that there is a combinpeople in such a short period. ation of bureaucratic and scientific hurdles to Since 2011, B.C.’s illicit-drug supply has be- overcome. come increasingly adulterated with fentanyl, a First, the toxicology centre needed permispotent synthetic opioid that authorities have sion to possess carfentanil. It only received found in more than 60 percent of people who federal consent to do so the first week of Dedied of an overdose this year. It’s projected that cember. The next step was to obtain a sample illicit drugs will kill more than 800 people in of the drug, which is sometimes used to tranB.C. in 2016, up from 510 last year, 366 the year quilize elephants. Interviewed on December before that, and 330 in 2013.

15, Schreiber said he hoped that a raw sample The recent surge in deaths over and above would arrive any day. the increase that fentanyl brought has prompt“That’s actually the limiting step, for many ed authorities to acknowledge that something labs,” he said, “is getting the pure drug so that has changed. you can develop a test that is reliable.”

Interviewed last week, Barb McLintock, a Step three is where things get complicated. spokesperson for the B.C. Coroners Service, “We are going to be looking for fairly small said that “about 10” deaths that occurred in the amounts of this compound, and we’re going past four months “looked like a drug overdose” to be looking for it in blood,” Schreiber said. but toxicology reports came back negative for “Blood is a very complex mixture. It is full of drugs such as heroin, fentanyl, and cocaine. cells, it is full of proteins, it is full of all kinds of “We have a few cases…in which we have small molecules as well—things that we need what appears to be a drug overdose—as in the to live—and we need to be able to detect just scene looks like a drug-overdose death—but a very tiny amount of carfentanil in this mixthe first round of toxicology hasn’t come back ture of stuff that has much greater amounts of positive for a drug overdose,” McLintock said. other chemicals. And we need to have a test That could mean that what killed those that will allow us to see it specifically.” people—and, possibly, the people who died That involves first crafting a procedure for the weekend of December 15—is carfentanil, extracting carfentanil from the liquids carrya synthetic opioid similar to fentanyl but ing it, then designing a test that can reliably

Health

Local authorities are trying to determine what is causing a spike in deaths from overdoses in Vancouver, including the 16 people who died between December 15 and 18. Travis Lupick photo.

confirm whether or not that substance that was extracted is indeed carfentanil.

“It’s chemistry,” Schreiber said.

It’s also highly unlikely that testing strips that are currently the subject of a trial at Vancouver’s Insite facility will be able to detect carfentanil.

Last September, the Straight reported that the strips, available at Insite for free, are a cheap and easy way for drug users to test if substances they purchased as heroin or cocaine contain fentanyl.

The company supplying the strips to Insite’s operator, Vancouver Coastal Health, is Ontario-based BTNX Inc. On the phone from Markham, the company’s president and CEO, Iqbal Sunderani, said they have never tried detecting carfentanil. But based on how the chemistry involved works, Sunderani said, it is doubtful the strips can identify it.

“I don’t think that our test could pick that up,”

he said. “We reckon we could develop one. But we would need help with funding. Carfentanil, for us to outlay a research project just based on this, it would be exorbitant for us to absorb.”

According to the latest trial data supplied

by Vancouver Coastal Health, 82 percent of substances purchased as heroin tested positive for fentanyl from July 7 to October 31. For all drugs, that number is 80 percent.

On November 29, Vancouver police confirmed that carfentanil had been detected near the body of a man who had died in East Vancouver two weeks earlier. That test was conducted at a lab in Ottawa and involved a raw substance as opposed to a blood analysis.

Given the number of deaths the coroners service now suspects are overdoses but that tested negative for drugs, Schreiber said he does think carfentanil was involved.

“This would be an educated guess, but I think the answer is yes,” he said. -

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bridge, Treetops Adventure, Cliffwalk, rainforest, and canyon. To Jan 8, Capilano Suspension Bridge (3735 Capilano Rd., North Van). Tix $13.95-39.95/kids under six free, info www.capbridge.com/.

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VANCOUVER CHRISTMAS MARKET 2016 Celebrate the Yuletide season with traditional German cuisine, mulled wine, gingerbread, German beer, a Christmas pyramid, a large heated tent overlooking the North Shore, entertainment, and vendors selling gifts and treasures. To Dec 30, Jack Poole Plaza (1055 Canada Place). Tix from $4, info www.vancouverchristmas market.com/.

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IPAD LEARN AND LOAN Take a twohour introductory session and then borrow an iPad for two weeks to practise what you’ve learned. Dec 22, 2-4 pm, West Vancouver Memorial Library (1950 Marine Dr., West Van). Free admission, info www.westvanlibrary.ca/.

DEBT SMARTS Learn more about managing debt with a certified financial trainer. Topics include student loans, consolidated loans, credit counselling, and bankruptcy. Dec 22, 6-7:30 pm, Vancouver Public Library Firehall Branch (1455 W. 10th). Free admission, info www.vpl.ca/.

BENEFITS 2THIS WEEK LIGHTS OF HOPE Annual lighting display uses only donated materials and more than 10 km of twinkling lights. Proceeds go to the St. Paul’s Foundation. To Jan 9, St. Paul’s Hospital (1081 Burrard Street).

Info donate.helpstpauls.com/.

SOS CHILDREN’S GINGERBREAD VILLAGE Vote on your favourite gingerbread creation and get your photo with Santa in his mountaintop workshop.

Proceeds go to SOS Children’s Village B.C.’s programs and homes for local foster children and homeless youth. To Jan 1, Grouse Mountain (6400 Nancy Greene Way, North Van). Info www.sosbc.org/ news-events/PoC/.

BLANCHE NORTON ALL-STAR FUNDRAISER Concert includes music by Rodney DeCroo, the Myrtle Family Band, Al Mader, Geoff Berner, Big Top, and Petunia and the Vipers. Proceeds go to Blanche Norton, a Vancouver music-scene personality who suffers from MS. Dec 22, 7 pm, WISE Hall (1882 Adanac). Tix $25/20, info www. ashowforblanche.brownpapertickets.com/.

THE ORIGINAL UGLY CHRISTMAS SWEATER PARTY Put on your favourite ugly Christmas sweater and party on down in support of the Children’s Wish Foundation of Canada. Dec 23, 8 pm, Commodore Ballroom (868 Granville). Tix $35, info www.nowthatsugly.com/party/.

FOOD AND DRINK 2JUST ANNOUNCED DINE OUT VANCOUVER FESTIVAL The 17-day schedule of events provides festivalgoers with unique culinary experiences such as guided dining adventures, brunch crawls, cocktail masterclasses, wine debates, guest chef dinners, B.C. VQA wine and craft-beer tastings, street-food markets, and hundreds of restaurants offering multicourse dinners at $20, $30, or $40. Jan 20–Feb 5, 2017, various Vancouver venues. Info www.dineoutvancouver.com/.

ET CETERA 2THIS WEEK HERITAGE CHRISTMAS Highlights include light displays, vintage shop-window displays, a visit with Father Christmas, live entertainment, fresh heritage baking, kids’ crafts, holiday scenes in heritage homes, a sing-along, and a scavenger hunt. To Jan 2, 1 pm, Burnaby Village Museum (6501 Deer Lake Ave., Burnaby). Free admission, info www.burnabyvillagemuseum.ca/christmas/.

KITSMAS Highlights include mistletoe, Santa-letter mailboxes, free gifts while you shop, and complimentary valet parking on Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays.

Donations will be accepted for Canuck Place. To Dec 24, West 4th Avenue. Info www.shopwest4th.com/.

CHRISTMAS AT FLYOVER CANADA Guests will have fun helping Santa search for his missing elves during an exhilarating flight across Canada and on to the North Pole. To Jan 2, FlyOver Canada (201999 Canada Place). Info www.flyover canada.com/.

CANYON LIGHTS See the world’s tallest Christmas tree, go on a snowy owl prowl, decorate gingerbread cookies, make a Christmas card, sing along with the holiday band, and stroll through the lights decorating the suspension

28 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

FESTIVAL OF LIGHTS Experience a winter wonderland filled with over one million twinkling lights. Other highlights include a carousel, interactive themed areas, a dancing-lights show, roving Scandinavian gnomes and reindeer, the Make-A-Wish candle grotto, and photos with Santa. To Jan 2, VanDusen Botanical Garden (5251 Oak). Tix $18.50/14.25/11/ kids under three free, info www.vancou ver.ca/vandusenfol/.

HOLIDAY HEIGHTS AT BLOEDEL Experience a winter wonderland, complete with magical lights, festive music, a holiday scavenger hunt, seasonal activities, and a Ferris-wheel ride. To Jan 2, Bloedel Conservatory (4600 Cambie, Queen Elizabeth Park). Tix $6.75/4.50/3.25, info www.vancouver.ca/parks-recreationculture/holiday-heights.aspx.

CHRISTMAS LIGHTS TOURS See the colourfully decorated homes in the Lower Mainland. Proceeds go to the Transit Museum Society. To Dec 30, 7-9:30 pm, 22nd Street Skytrain Station (New Westminster). Tix $25/15/5, info www. trams.ca/.

WISE HALL NIGHT FLEA Buy everything from LPs to old fashioned tools, vintage gig posters to hand-crafted underpants.

Dec 23, 5-10 pm, WISE Hall (1882 Adanac).

Free admission, info www.facebook.com/ events/1765446813719449/.

SUSPENDED REVERIE Contemplative dream event featuring live music by violist Genevieve MacKay. Dec 26, 2-3 pm; Dec 28, 2-3 pm; Dec 30, 7:30-8:30 pm, Stretch (180 E. Pender). Tix $30, info www. stretchvancouver.com/.

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For up-to-the-minute, searchable Events Time Out listings, visit

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2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS WELCOME TO NIGHT VALE LIVE A live performance of the hit cult podcast Welcome to Night Vale, a twice-monthly podcast in the style of community updates for the small desert town of Night Vale. Feb 20, doors 7 pm, show 8 pm, Chan Centre for the Performing Arts (6265 Crescent Rd., UBC). Tix $39.50/27.50 (plus service charges and fees) at www. livenation.com/.

KIDS’ STUFF 2THIS WEEK BRIGHT NIGHTS IN STANLEY PARK Experience the holiday-themed lights, displays, and live performers along the miniature-train route, view the displays at the train plaza, and get photos taken with Santa (until Dec 24). Proceeds go to the B.C. Professional Fire Fighters’ Burn Fund. To Jan 1, Stanley Park Miniature Train (Stanley Park). Tix $6-12, info www.bright nights.ca/.

ZOOM INTO NANO The exhibition lets you zoom into tiny structures and devices to see the intricacy of natural and manmade objects. Immerse yourself in models of atoms and molecules that are enlarged to 100 million times their actual size and check out the full-body interactives. To Jan 2, Science World at Telus World of Science (1455 Quebec). Tix $15.25-23.25/kids under three free, info www.scienceworld.ca/nano/.

CHRISTMAS AT THE MARKET Celebrate the holiday season with family-friendly activities like visits from Elsa and Anna (from Disney’s Frozen), a holiday card-making workshop, and breakfast with Santa. To Dec 24, Lonsdale Quay (123 Carrie Cates Court, North Van). Info www.lonsdalequay.com/.

HOLIDAYS AT BRITANNIA Highlights include holiday village displays, kids’ craft workshops, Christmas storytime, and photos with Santa and Mrs. Claus. To Dec 31, Britannia Mine Museum (1 Forbes Way, Britannia Beach). Info www.britan niaminemuseum.ca/events-app/holidaysat-britannia/.

HOLIDAYS AT VANCOUVER AQUARIUM Highlights include Scuba Claws, a holiday tree lit by power generated by an electric eel, origami jellyfish, a marine-debris tree, and a 4-D screening of The Polar Express.

To Jan 2, 2017, 10 am–5 pm, Vancouver Aquarium (845 Avison Way, Stanley Park).

Tix $36, info www.vanaqua.org/.

CAMP GAN ISRAEL WINTER CAMP Each day features Jewish songs, crafts and stories, specialty instructors in subjects such as drama and sports, and a field trip. To Dec 30, 9 am–3:30 pm, Chabad Lubavitch B.C. (5750 Oak). Tix $200-360, info www.ganisraelbc.com/.

see next page

DISNEY CHANUKAH ON ICE Light the first Hanukkah candle and enjoy doughnuts, dreidels, gelt, and Chanukah music.

Dec 25, 3-5 pm, Hillcrest Community Centre (4575 Clancy Loranger Way). Tix $5, info www.chabadeastvan.com/.

Langley). Tix $19.50-40 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ticketrocket.co/.

SPORTS

CANUCKS VS. KINGS The Vancouver Canucks take on the Los Angeles Kings in National Hockey League action. Dec 28, 7 pm, Rogers Arena (800 Griffiths Way). Tix $87.75-281.75 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ticketmaster.ca/.

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CANUCKS VS. JETS The Vancouver Canucks take on the Winnipeg Jets in National Hockey League action. Dec 22, 7 pm, Rogers Arena (800 Griffiths Way). Tix $78.75-240.75 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ticketmaster.ca/.

BLOEDEL CONSERVATORY Experience the colours and scents of the tropics at a venue that features more than 200 free-flying exotic birds and 500 exotic plants and flowers. 4600 Cambie, Queen Elizabeth Park. Info vancouver.ca/parks-recreationculture/bloedel-conservatory.aspx

GIANTS VS. SILVERTIPS The Vancouver Giants take on the Everett Silvertips in Western Hockey League action. Dec 27, 7 pm, Langley Events Centre (7888 200th St.,

CYPRESS MOUNTAIN Skiing and snowboarding lessons, snowtubing park, cross-country ski trails, downhill skiing and

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DR. SUN YAT-SEN CLASSICAL CHINESE GARDEN The garden is an authentic representation of an age-old garden tradition that reached its peak in the Ming Dynasty.

It is the first of its kind outside China and is available for rental. Regular events include garden tours, cultural exchanges, and educational programs. 578 Carrall. Info 604-6623207, www.vancouverchinesegarden.com/ EDGEWATER CASINO Casino in the downtown core offers 24-hour gaming, over 60 table games, a poker room, a high-limit section, 500 slot machines, restaurants and lounges, and live entertainment including concerts and televised UFC events. 760 Pacific Blvd. S. Info 604687-3343, www.edgewatercasino.ca/

GROUSE MOUNTAIN Mountain resort overlooking Vancouver features a Skyride to the peak with views of the city and the Pacific Ocean, as well as skiing and snowboarding, snowshoeing, ice skating, mountain ziplines, the Peak of Christmas, and wind turbines. 6400 Nancy Greene Way, North Van. Info 604-980-9311, www. grousemountain.com/ MOUNT SEYMOUR Skiing and snowboarding lessons from the Mt. Seymour Ski and Snowboard School, tubing and tobogganing, and snowshoe trails. 1700 Mount Seymour Rd., North Van. Info 604986-2261, www.mountseymour.com/ ROBSON SQUARE ICE RINK Celebrate winter with skating in the heart of downtown Vancouver. Open until February 14.

Skate rental fee is $4. Skate rentals end 30 minutes before close. 800 Robson. Info 604-646-3554, www.robsonsquare.com/

VANDUSEN BOTANICAL GARDEN This 22-hectare garden features over 255,000 plants from around the world and almost two dozen sculptures. 5251 Oak. Info 604878-9274, www.vandusengarden.org/

OUT OF TOWN 2JUST ANNOUNCED SNOWBOMBING Music festival includes ski and snowboard competitions and DJ battles. Apr 6-10, Sun Peaks Resort. Info www.snowbombing.com/.

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DECEMBER 22 – JANUARY 5 / 2016 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 29

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 29

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burgoo.ca 30 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; JANUARY 5 / 2017

KITSILANO 2272 WEST 4TH 604.734.3478

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FOOD

Culinary cultural flair shines at new spots Here’s a list of some of the most intriguing new eateries in the city to check out when you’re seeking appetizing adventures for your palate

A

nother year, another slew of new fingerling potatoes wrapped in serrano restaurants. Pho, ramen, and poké ham, albacore-tuna ceviche, braised-goatjoints seemed to pop up every week, and-pork sliders, and chorizo-and-beef alwhile a few existing establishments bondigas. built on their success by opening additional locations (La Mezcaleria, Tractor Every- CHI MODERN VIETNAMESE CUISINE day Health Foods, Yah Yah Ya Ramen, and (1935 West 4th Avenue) Former MasterChef BiBo Pizza al Taglio, to name a few). While Vietnam competitor Chi Le is the doting force behind this Kitsilano not an exhaustive list, what eatery. If you’re not havfollows is a sampling of ing organic-chicken pho, some of the most notable try the sweet-and-spicy eateries to have joined the Gail Johnson caramel fish clay pot, charcity’s culinary offerings this year, spots to keep in mind next time grilled eggplant, papaya salad, or duck rolls you’re thinking: “Where should we go for with cumin-infused tamarind sauce—all dishes meant to be shared. dinner tonight?”

Best Eats

CABRITO–TAPAS BEBIDAS (2270 Com-

mercial Drive) French-born chef Alexandre Carriere brings Spain to the East Side with items like jamón Ibérico de Bellota, Basque chorizo, and 12-month-aged manchego PDO, all while partnering with esteemed local producers and suppliers like Two Rivers Meats, Odd Society Spirits, and 49th Parallel. A bold, bullish mural emblazons one of the exposed-brick walls in the warm and welcoming 36-seat spot that specializes in pintxos. You’ll find items like bright aguacate with piquillo and habanero peppers,

THINGS TO DO

JUNIPER (185 Keefer Street) With Saskatch-

ewan black lentils and a tourtière-inspired dishes having shown up on the rotating menu, and a cocktail list that emphasizes Barcelona-style gin and tonics served in balloon glasses, the resto isn’t, as it claims, dedicated to the Pacific Northwest.

But exec chef Sarah Stewart delivers rustic, wholesome, f lavourful food. Memorable dishes include spicy bison-based osso buco and crispy-skinned arctic char, while fish- and meat-based charcuterie boards don’t disappoint.

With menu items like its cheese and charcuterie platter, Cabrito-Tapas Bebidas combines Spanish cuisine with ingredients from local producers and suppliers. Daniel Marquardt photo.

KISSA TANTO (263 East Pender Street) Situ-

ated on the second floor of an old building in the heart of Chinatown, the newest venture by the team behind Bao Bei Chinese Brasserie (Joel Watanabe, Alain Chow, and Tannis Ling) is a sexy spot with a 1960s, Tokyo jazz-club aesthetic, featuring banker’s lamps and rose banquettes. Japanese-Italian fare, it turns out,

Meal ticket ANNIVERSARY BITES Time flies when you’re having good food—especially if it’s delicious comfort food. Burgoo Bistro will be celebrating the 15th anniversary of the opening of its first restaurant (4434 West 10th Avenue) on Tuesday (December 27), and all of its locations will be offering some tasty surprises. Guests can expect to be treated to complimentary sparkling wine and some decadent chocolate mousse. It’s not a party without some decorative balloons, so when you walk in and wonder whose birthday it is, you’ll know that Burgoo is turning the big 1-5. Here’s hoping for many more years at this cozy neighbourhood hot spot. -

1

YEW SEAFOOD + BAR (791 West Georgia Street) Offering a three-course meal ($99, plus tax and gratuity) with Dungeness crab and roasted sea scallops.

2

OCEANS 999 AT PAN PACIFIC (300–999 Canada Place) Serving a “Night Before Christmas” buffet (various prices) with charcuterie, sushi, sablefish, dessert, and more.

3

BOULEVARD KITCHEN & OYSTER BAR (845 Burrard Street) Indulge in a three-course dinner ($68, plus tax and gratuity) with dishes like turkey and Yule logs.

4

MIKU (70–200 Granville Street) A holiday menu ($125, plus tax and gratuity) that features American wagyu beef and its signature aburi (flame-seared) sushi.

5

WEST RESTAURANT (2881 Granville Street) Its holiday tasting menu ($150, plus tax and gratuity) will serve up dishes like truffle scrambled eggs and chocolate torte.

604.558.3320

www.boblikesthaifood.com

COG NOG For a born-and-bred Vancouverite, there are two appropriate eggnog options: a homemade variety, spiked with generous amounts of rum; and Avalon Dairy’s legendary organic concoction, also spiked with generous amounts of rum. If you’re a nightmare in the kitchen and Avalon’s has predictably sold out, head to YEW seafood + bar (791 West Georgia Street), where the Cog Nog will surely get you into the festive spirit. Think cognac, cream, Darjeeling tea syrup, and smoky, South American– inspired bitters joined in a patriotic moose-shaped mug that screams “I am Canadian!” and “Merry Christmas!” -

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FOOD High five

BOB LIKES THAI FOOD

is as satisfying as it is intriguing. Tajarin, the restaurant’s signature pasta, is a toothsome twist on carbonara, egg noodles with roasted shiitake and porcini mushrooms and butter topped with miso-cured egg yolk. Another standout is a whole fish (the type always changing) that is flash-fried and served with a soy dipping sauce

New Year’s Eve

Vancouver’s first Central Texas BBQ roadhouse is NOW OPEN. Reservations recommended.

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2016

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DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 31

FOOD

Multicourse menus ring in the new year From classic to modern and from French to Thai, Vancouver’s culinary cornucopia offers up a range of choices to cap off 2016 last (and sweetest) course. Reservations can be made by calling 604-730-5579.

> BY TA M MY KWAN

W

hat better way to ring in 2017 than by enjoying a great meal with your loved ones? Our city is offering a plethora of New Year’s Eve dinners, so you can choose from French cuisine, contemporary Thai dishes, classic Italian food, and West Coast favourites. Here are nine restaurants in Metro Vancouver that are offering multicourse menus on the last day of 2016—cheers.

MINAMI (1118 Mainland Street) This Yale-

town dining hot spot will be featuring a live band during its NYE dinner service, and it will also be offering a special New Year’s Eve menu ($98 per person, plus tax and gratuity).

Restaurantgoers will start off with a sashimi duo as an amuse-bouche before chowing down on an appetizer trio that includes albacore tuna kaiso seaweed tartare. A dish with half an Atlantic lobster tail and beef tenderloin is also on the menu, as well as its famous aburi (flame-seared) sushi. Reservations can be made by calling 604-685-8080.

COMPTOIR (2278 West 4th Avenue) Lovers of classic French fare should check out the celebratory four-course menu ($95 per person plus tax and gratuity) at this Kitsilano bistro. Guests will taste parsnip mousse with compressed apple and caramelized honey, house smoked-salmon ballotine, and panroasted black cod, among other dishes. The sweet treat at the end of the dinner is a hazelnut-chocolate layer cake with cocoa-beaninfused ice cream—yum. Reservations can be made by calling 604-569-2278.

AU

BISHOP’S (2183 West 4th Avenue) This legend-

ary restaurant will be serving up a special New Year’s Eve menu ($125 per person, plus tax and gratuity) that comes with a glass of Champagne, which is perfect for giving a toast to the incoming year. Treat your taste buds to some smoked salmon and caviar blinis, seared weathervane scallops, chicken and porcini ravioli with truffle cream, and roast lamb chop Niçoise. Featured desserts will include blood-orange sorbet with Moscato d’Asti. Reservations can be made online at www.bishopsonline.com/.

CIBO TRATTORIA (900 Seymour Street) If you want to indulge in some traditional Italian food on December 31, this is the eatery for you. Two dinner seating times will be available, with two separate multicourse menus ($84 and $124 per person, plus tax and gratuity). Featured items range from duck-liver terrine to prosciutto-wrapped rabbit loin, and smoked-ricotta ravioli with garlic butter to tagliolini with butter-poached oyster. Save room for sweets, because you’ll want to finish

Joe Fortes’s multicourse menu features Atlantic lobster, jumbo scallops, and fresh prawns.

with its Champagne granita with compressed Executive chef Wayne Sych has created a Bosc pear. Reservations can be made by calling mouthwatering multicourse menu ($60 per person, plus tax and gratuity) that includes 604-602-9570.

Atlantic lobster, jumbo scallops, and fresh E.B.O RESTAURANT & LOUNGE (4331 Do- prawns. If you’re not digging seafood, you minion Street, Burnaby) Can’t decide what type can choose to devour AAA prime rib inof cuisine to feast on? We recommend enjoying stead. The second seating is already sold-out, a New Year’s Eve dinner buffet ($50 per person, so you can bet that this is a popular dining plus tax and gratuity) at this swanky dining choice on December 31. Reservations can be lounge. Gourmet choices will include tasty salads, made by calling 604-669-1940. assorted sushi, cold seafood, roast turkey, chicken satay, pork belly, carved prime rib, and Yorkshire MAENAM (1938 West 4th Avenue) Feelpudding. There’s a kids’ corner to satisfy the ing like going for Southeast Asian f lavours? young ones, and a dessert table featuring festive Maenam will be offering two menus ($75 sweets, liquid-nitrogen ice cream, and a cookie- per person, plus tax and gratuity) on the last decorating station. You can bet that this will be a day of the year—family-style and vegetarian meal to remember. Reservations can be made by family-style. The sweet and savoury bites will include its famous spot prawn cracker emailing dhr.yvrdb.ebo@marriott.com. with uni, diced tuna, and ikura; grilled scalJOE FORTES SEAFOOD & CHOPHOUSE lop salad; beef rib; potato cones; cucumber (777 Thurlow Street) Celebrate New Year’s ceviche; and aromatic vegetarian curry.

Eve with good food on this restaurant’s Guests can choose black sticky rice with rooftop patio or in the lively dining room. coconut syrup or guava semifreddo for the

VOTE

FOR YOUR FAVOURITE RESTAURANTS

ROCKY MOUNTAIN FLATBREAD (1876 West 1st Avenue and 4186 Main Street) Not all kids can stay up until midnight for the countdown, so this eatery has planned it all out for you and the family. Rocky Mountain Flatbread will be hosting a New Year’s Eve pizza party ($20 per child and $25 per adult, plus tax and gratuity) at both its locations at 4 p.m. and 6:15 p.m. Feast on some housemade soup, salad, artisan pizza, and brownies (for the kids). It’s not a party without some entertainment, so face-painting, balloon-twisting, and an early countdown are on the agenda. Reservations can be made by emailing info@rockymountainflatbread.ca.

DINETTE (905 Dunsmuir Street) Those who love locally sourced, farm-to-table food will want to celebrate 2016 at this restaurant. Two dinner seating times will be available, with two separate multicourse menus ($70 and $100 per person, plus tax and gratuity). Featured culinary creations include beach angel oysters with Northern Divine caviar, sake-kasu marinated sablefish, scallop crudo with pickled vegetables, dry-aged beef rib eye, and more. As for dessert—prepare to indulge in dark chocolate with pain d’épice ice cream with quince and chestnut. Wine pairings are also available for an additional charge ($55 and $70). Reservations can be made by calling 604-974-8077. ROYAL

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32 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

Pinot Noir: a study in fascinating variations

W

e’re going to geek out on Pinot does have a good dose of complexity to it, with Noir this week with a half-doz- cola and sarsaparilla notes on the nose and a few cherries bobbing around in there, too. Those en recommended bottles.

The grape typically makes elements continue onto the palate, landing on softer, elegant reds with plenty of berry fruit, a nice earthy undercurrent and characteristics though there are many elements that affect the of mulled wine, along with spices we associate with it, like cinnamon and cloves. character of the finished wine in the bottle.

There are some factors— THE HATCH 2014 BIRD’S like the quality of the vinEYE VIEW PINOT NOIR tage and whether oak is CLONE 667 ($39.99) Clone incorporated during ferKurtis Kolt 667 has aromatics of darker mentation or the aging process—whose result will be pretty obvious: you berry fruit, mulberries, blueberries, and the pretty much know what you’re getting into, like, and then they’re livened up on the palate with brighter red fruit like wild strawberries stylewise, before you even pull the cork.

Then there are the more subtle tweaks and and raspberries, finishing off with light floral nuances, including, in the case of Pinot Noir, notes. Of these three wines, I found the 667 to which varietal clones have gone into the wine. be the most soft and delicate.

These clones, which are commonly naturally occurring mutations of the same variety, all fit THE HATCH 2014 BIRD’S EYE VIEW PIunder the same Pinot Noir umbrella but can NOT NOIR CLONE 777 ($39.99) Clone vary in how they grow and, more noticeably on 777 strays furthest from the pack, with hardly any berry fruit at all. Distinct notes our side of things, how they taste.

The crew at the Hatch winery in West Ke- of stewed dark plums and prunes waft out lowna played around with the theme, separately of the glass at the very first swirl, leading to crafting three different clones of Pinot Noir more of an umami profile on the palate, with in the 2014 vintage, aging each of them in old f lavours of hoisin sauce, black tea, and sunFrench oak for 16 months. Being that they’re all dried tomato, then finishing with a dark, from the same vintage and made the exact same f loral crack of black pepper. way, the result is a spotlight on each clone’s perOf course, there’s something to be said for sonality, and it’s pretty fascinating—they certainly each have their own expression and flair. making a wine with a mix of clones; there’s For more information and to track them down, likely to be more complexity going on in the glass when you do so. That’s what they’ve check out www.thehatchwines.com/. done at SpierHead Winery across Lake OkaTHE HATCH 2014 BIRD’S EYE VIEW PINOT nagan in Kelowna, with a trio of their own NOIR CLONE 115 ($39.99) All three of these Pinot Noirs, each one with its own unique wines are quite soft and pretty and are pure character. Information and availability are at pleasure to drink. Super quaffable. Clone 115 www.spierheadwinery.com/.

The Bottle

Kelowna’s Hatch Winery and SpierHead Winery have explored how naturally occurring mutations of the Pinot Noir grape can express their own unique character, even when made the same way.

SPIERHEAD PINOT NOIR 2015 ($25) This

mix of clones 115, 667, 777, and 828 was aged in French oak for 10 months, which brings a light tannic character to a basket of Italian plums, blackberries, black currants, and some fresh thyme. While those are darker fruit notes, the wine is quite bright and pristine, with juicy acidity; it’s very easy to keep going back to the glass.

SPIERHEAD PINOT NOIR GFV SADDLE BLOCK 2015 ($30) GFV stands for Gentle-

man Farmer Vineyard, and that’s SpierHead’s home vineyard situated right at the winery.

Clones 777, 115, and 828 are all grown in the sandy, silty soils here—each of them present in this wine that has also been aged in French oak for 10 months. I find the oak here a little more prominent and toasty amongst the red-berry fruit on the nose; the aromas immediately

reminded me of the cherry pies with crazy-hot filling that McDonald’s used to have. I totally mean that as a good thing, by the way; if it’s a little too lowbrow for you, maybe think clafoutis instead. On the palate, those cherry notes continue, with a few baked apples and cinnamon thrown in for good measure.

SPIERHEAD PINOT NOIR CUVÉE 2015

($38) Finally, the winery selects its best fruit to hand-harvest and age in its best barrels, and that becomes its cuvée; this year’s edition is composed of a Pommard clone, along with clones 667, 777, 115, and 828. Black licorice and dark fruit are here in spades, with a good splash of espresso and cocoa toward the finish.

Further sips include notes of beef brisket, oregano, and a pinch of pepper on the end. There’s a lot going on here, and it’s only going to get better over the next couple of years. -

AFGHAN HORSEMEN RESTAURANT SINCE 1974

AWARD WINNING AFGHAN CUISINE

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2014

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BEFORE THE ENTRANCE TO GRANVILLE ISLAND, RIGHT BEHIND THE STARBUCKS

(604)873-5923 Open 7 Days A Week www.afghanhorsemen.com

Chef Faizal Kassam draws inspriation from French, Spanish, Italian, and North African culinary influences at Terroir Kitchen.

New spots

from page 31

thickened with puréed daikon. If you can’t decide between sake and amaro to sip, have a retro cocktail like an amaretto sour or the house’s Singapore Sling, complete with umbrella.

NABEBUGYO (3190 Cambie Street) This isn’t a place to linger, but I love that you get to make your own meal at your personal induction cooking station in this minimalist space lovingly run by Tetsuya Kotoge and his manager wife, Megumi.

Options include kimchi, coconutmilk, and kombu bases; there’s also a half portion for kids and a western tomato-soup-style hot pot for the unadventurous eater in your life. As in Japan, the restaurant has a no-tipping policy.

NIGHTINGALE (1017 West Hast-

ings Street) Chef David Hawksworth is neither reinventing the wheel nor doing Hawksworth 2.0 at his new spot; rather, he is offering simple, tasty food at comparatively reasonable prices. It’s a formula that has made Cactus Club so success-

ful; I like them both. The space in the Marine Building is absolutely gorgeous: a lounge with fireplace, library furniture, square-shaped subway-tiled pillars, and double-height ceilings; walls adorned with the namesake birds, resembling golden origami forms; and a magnificent bar that carries gin and tonic on tap.

Go with a small group of friends and share dishes like grilled broccolini spiked with chili and garlic; sunflower-seed-sprinkled oven-roasted cauliflower with green harissa; wood-fired guanciale-and-greenolive pizza; grilled Pacific rockfish; crispy fried chicken…

SAVIO VOLPE (615 Kingsway) It describes itself as a casual neighbourhood joint, but it’s become a hot spot that’s hard to get into and that has electrified the suddenly hip East Side area known as Fraserhood. The room is airy and light, with funky modern light fixtures and some irreverent touches, like two paintings of Renaissance figures whose faces are obscured by wall sconces. The strongest dishes are house-made pastas, like the tortiglioni with beef braciola, and those that come from the wood-fired

oven, like a wild-boar chop or halfchicken. The drink selection is smart and straightforward, with an allItalian wine list and select local craft beers; order me an Aperol spritz.

TERROIR KITCHEN (2232 Marine Drive, West Vancouver) Chef Faizal Kassam has transformed the dark former home of La Régalade into a contemporary space with f loor-to-ceiling windows that specializes in seasonal small plates of French, Spanish, Italian, and North African origin. (There’s a small patio with an ocean view, too.)

Before taking on the role of executive chef at Uva Wine and Cocktail Bar, Kassam worked at some of the city’s top spots, including Hawksworth and Bacchus at the Wedgewood Hotel. (Interestingly, the North Shore native started out as a dishwasher at La Régalade, where he discovered his passion for cooking.) Standout dishes include confit-duck risotto; potato gnocchi with venison ragu topped with crispy sage, saffron pecorino, and cocoa nibs; and a daily fish served whole with lemon, olives, capers, and fingerling potatoes. -

E XC E P T I O N A L I TA L I A N C U I S I N E

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DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 33

december 8–31, 2016

meredith willson’s

Winner of 5 Tony Awards, Including Best Musical

the music man Book, Music & Lyrics by Meredith Willson

“It’s big, brassy, and a whole lot of fun.”

Georgia Straight

January 4 - 14, 2017

Tickets from $29

604.270.1812 • gatewaytheatre.com 34 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

Tickets from $22 Tues: 7pm Wed-Fri: 8pm Sat: 4pm & 8pm Sun: 3pm Wed: 1pm PWYC (Jan 4 & 11)

Firehall Arts Centre 280 E. Cordova firehallartscentre.com For tickets call: 604-689-0926

ARTS

Kidd Pivot and Electric Company Theatre’s Betroffenheit pulled us into a dark carnival of pain (left, Michael Slobodian photo); the Arts Club’s Onegin cast poured its heart into the lush music (David Cooper photo).

The stage’s most stellar moments

ONEGIN (An Arts Club

he is. Wrought with endlessly inventive projections Theatre Company presen- and props, the Ex Machina production was as vistation) Amiel Gladstone ually dazzling as it was touching. and Veda Hille’s reworking of Pushkin and NEW MUSIC FESTIVAL (A Vancouver Symphony Tchaikovsky was justly Orchestra presentation) The 2016 edition of the the most talked-about lo- VSO’s annual New Music Festival stood out for cal show of the year, and a number of reasons, not the least being an unthe most richly decor- usual—and memorable—slip of the tongue from ated at the Jessie Rich- music director Bramwell Tovey. At the Orpheum The year’s top shows featured a colourful cast of sinister ardson Theatre Awards. podium on the event’s final night, the alwaysquotable conductor described his band as “a livGladstone’s thrust stage vaudevillians, romantic Russians, and deliriously intense divas ing orgasm”—and then went on to prove capitalized on the The year 2016 will go down as a memorable flexibility and intimacy of the new Goldthe point he didn’t mean to make with one for the local performing arts, with several corp Stage at the BMO Theatre Centre, a flawless performance of Esa-Pekka Check out…

BY KATHL EEN OL I VE R, mind-blowing shows that went on to make major bringing the actors so close they might STRAIGHT.COM Salonen’s LA Variations. Intelligence is a crucial part of this challenging JA NET S MI TH , marks abroad. Here are a few of the productions have handed you a shot of vodka, and a Visit our website work’s sensual allure, and the VSO A L EX A NDER VAR TY that impacted us the most, from truly epic under- superlative ensemble poured its hearts for morning-after reviews and local takings to small but equally unforgettable experien- and voices into Veda Hille’s lushly rodelivered magnificently. arts news ces. And here’s hoping that 2017 has more to come. mantic music. If you can’t wait for the rePROGRAM 1 (A Ballet BC production) mount (it’s coming), you can get your own BETROFFENHEIT (A DanceHouse presentation) copy of the exquisite, compulsively listenable Ballet BC resident choreographer Cayetano Kidd Pivot and Electric Company Theatre took original-cast recording (available at vedahille.com). Soto pulled out all the stops for his first full evening us into an abyss of grief and somehow brought us It’s the next-best thing to being there. of work in a program that left audiences breathless. out the other side. In what was arguably the year’s The Spaniard dug bravely into themes of mortalmost unforgettable show (here or elsewhere, such 887 (An SFU Woodward’s and Théâtre la Seizième ity, with breakneck partnering that embodied the as London, where it drew all-out raves), the pain presentation) Few theatre experiences this year fury and struggle of life and death. Then he topped of an unspeakable loss took the form of a Kafk a- were as transformative as watching legend Rob- it all off with a wild surprise: the playful Schachesque room with no exit. The only temporary relief ert Lepage bring his most intimate childhood matt, a surreal ode to Bob Fosse–style chorus lines, was a parade of sinister vaudevillian entertainers memories to life inside the miniature apartments turned sculptural and contemporary in ways that and clowns. Crystal Pite’s surreal, ultradetailed on-stage. The personal, the political, and the art- only Soto could mould them. At the same time, he choreography made a perfect match for writer- istic intertwined in a show that dissected both the brought the best out of dancers in a company that’s actor Jonathon Young’s searing autobiographical Quebec upheaval of the 1960s and ’70s and the at the top of its game. working-class upbringing that made Lepage who honesty. Riveting and deeply moving. see next page

THINGS TO DO

ARTS High five

Editor’s choice OUT WITH THE OLD, IN WITH THE NEW You can cry over the absurd events of the past year—or you can laugh! To do the latter, and we highly encourage you to, head down to Vancouver TheatreSports League’s Year in Review, where the city’s best improvers will take you on a witty trip down memory lane. Expect them to wring maximum hilarity out of such spectacles as the Royal visit, the demise of Brangelina, and, of course, an election of a certain orangeskinned president. As a bonus, you can relive it at three New Year’s Eve shows—and yes, there will be bubbly available at the one that goes to midnight. A smashing way to ring in 2017, we think. Vancouver TheatreSports League’s Year in Review is at the Improv Centre on December 26, 27, 30, and 31.

Five events you just can’t miss this week

1

VANCOUVER SPECIAL (To April 17 at the Vancouver Art Gallery) A must-see if you’re interested in this city and its contemporary art.

2

COMEDY MIX NEW YEAR’S EVE (December 31) Chris James, Darcy Michael, and Ivan Decker bust out the New Year’s laughs.

3

SALUTE TO VIENNA (January 1 at the Orpheum) Resolve to be more sophisticated with these divine Strauss waltzes.

4

ALL TOGETHER NOW (To January 8 at the Museum of Vancouver) Perusing these cool collections is a great way to pass a slushy afternoon.

5

AVENUE Q (To December 31 at the Arts Club Granville Island Stage) Your last chance to catch the world’s most filthy-mouthed puppets.

In the news

NEW CULTURE BOSS Ballet BC is losing the executive director who’s helped rebuild the company and raise its international profile. But the City of Vancouver is gaining a new managing director of cultural services. The city has announced that Branislav Henselmann, who came to Ballet BC from London’s edgy Michael Clark Company in 2012, will now move to the post that leads the shaping of Vancouver’s arts-and-culture scene and oversees a budget of $11.5 million for cultural groups in 2017. Ballet BC is set to launch an international search for its new leader. In July of this year, the city announced that Richard Newirth would be leaving his post as managing director of cultural services—a department that oversees public-art programs, allocates grants, and manages cityowned facilities like the Vancouver Art Gallery and the Cultch. -

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 35

ARTS

Mezzo-soprano Joyce DiDonato left the audience in awe with her dramatically moving In War and Peace concert with the Vancouver Recital Society.

Sarah Louise Turner and Leanna Brodie play Vancouver’s first two female cops in And Bella Sang With Us. Emily Cooper photo.

Play fetes police pioneers > B Y A NDR EA WA R NE R

I

t’s been almost seven years since local playwright Sally Stubbs encountered Vancouver constables Minnie Miller and Lurancy Harris. Their connection was swift and deep, and Stubbs couldn’t shake her fascination with the women—despite the fact that she lived in totally different times, almost 100 years from Miller and Harris.

There were more questions than answers in Stubbs’s research; historical texts and resources offered up little information about Miller and Harris, even though they were trailblazers who made history in 1912 as the first two Vancouver women sworn in with full police powers, and two of the first female police officers in Canada. So Stubbs wrote her own version of Miller and Harris’s story in the form of her newest play, And Bella Sang With Us. “These women were doing a lot of their work in the area now known as the Downtown Eastside and Chinatown, and their focus was what they called the female-morality issue,” Stubbs tells the Straight over the phone. Vancouver’s economy was starting to boom, crime was going up, and women were increasingly the perpetrators, Stubbs explains.

Women’s Christian-mission groups decided that women needed to be involved in dealing with the issue.

Enter Miller and Harris.

Stubbs quickly realized that the things Miller and Harris faced on the job and in their daily lives (gender inequality, sexism, unequal pay) were as relevant today as they were in 1912 “There was prejudice and the inequitable situation they were dealing with,” Stubbs says. “Yes, it was full police powers, but their full police powers were quite different than the men. They made less money, they didn’t have uniforms like the men did, they were working in these long skirts. They didn’t have weapons, but they were expected to be out patrolling beaches, bars, pool halls, and dance halls, places where women were likely to get into trouble. They really weren’t given the kind of backup they required.”

But they were still expected to do the job, and this is partly what Stubbs found so inspiring about the pair. She started writing in 2010, but it didn’t go quite as planned.

And Bella Sang With Us is actually the second incarnation of Stubbs’s play about the two constables. Originally, it was titled Kid Gloves, and it had a brief run at the Firehall in 2012, but Stubbs says that as soon as they entered the rehearsal room, she knew the play wasn’t ready.

“It became clear to me that I was gonna get clobbered and that did happen,” Stubbs says. At first, Stubbs was devastated by the negative feedback. She brief ly considered quitting altogether.

“Then I thought, ‘Stop it, grow up.’

These women are worth exploring, and these women are worth celebrating, and so I licked my wounds for a while, then went back to it.”

Stubbs revised and rewrote the play, workshopped it, and considered the feedback and the public response.

Ultimately, she says, it was a hard lesson, but a good one, and it paid off when four years later And Bella Sang With Us was selected as a Pick of the Fringe at the 2016 Vancouver International Fringe Festival.

“There were full houses, people being turned away, and it felt like I could stop worrying a bit about it,” Stubbs laughs. “It’s silly to make such a big thing out of it, but I did, and I felt like I was carrying around this albatross.”

About four years later, Stubbs’s play is finally where she wanted it to be: a love letter of sorts to two pioneering women. In just a few days, Bella will make its official Firehall Arts Centre comeback. A drama with a bit of song, and some darkly and sharply funny moments, it bears little resemblance to the original, other than the fact that it is still about Miller and Harris.

“It’s a story about them finding their way in this world that’s unused to female authority figures,” Stubbs says. “But it becomes about them finding their way to one another.” And Bella Sang With Us runs from J a n u a r y 4 t o 1 4 a t t h e F i re h a l l Arts Centre.

LAYERS OF INFLUENCE

Stellar stage moments

from previous page

JOYCE DIDONATO: IN WAR AND PEACE (A Vancouver Recital Society

presentation) When the lights came up at the intermission of this cathartic musical response to our difficult times, the entire Orpheum audience seemed to be paralyzed in stunned silence; some were in tears, some were just staring in awe. The world’s reigning mezzo-soprano brought bonechilling intensity to her Baroque works, holding the stage in her silvery Vivienne Westwood gown. Pieces like the impossibly aching “Lascia ch’io pianga” felt like they were laying bare the singer’s inner suffering at cataclysmic world events. Adding to the experience was the young orchestra Il Pomo d’Oro, bringing incredible flair to these early-music jewels.

THE AFTER AFTER PARTY (A Vancouver Fringe Festival presentation) A hit at the Fringe Festival, Katey Hoffman and Cheyenne Mabberley’s outrageous comedy focuses on two drunken teenage girls trying desperately to remember how they got that way. Hoffman and Mabberley’s perspective on adolescence and female friendships is irreverent, tender, and surprising; your face actually hurt from laughing after watching this show. Good news: as the winner of the Cultchivating the Fringe Award, The After After Party will be at the Cultch next season.

JACKET WINTER (A Théâtre la Seizième presentation.)

The intimacy of Esther Duquette and Gilles Poulin-Denis’s playful approach

STRAIGHT

to their very personal story has lingered with us. From the agoraphobic depression they experienced upon uprooting themselves from their Montreal home and relocating to Vancouver, the couple have created a stylish and affirming testament to theatre’s transformative power. Audiences back East got to experience the show when it toured later in the fall, but luckily, we get to keep the artists.

MONUMENTAL (A PuSh Internation-

al Performing Arts Festival presentation) One of the year’s capital-E Events was the Holy Body Tattoo’s return to the stage after a long hiatus, this time with Montreal postrock geniuses Godspeed You! Black Emperor playing live.

A dream 10 years in the making, the show was as epic as the title would lead you to believe. While Godspeed You! built its eerily driving wall of sound, the dancers pummelled themselves while balancing on museum-style plinths. A cool meld of contemporary dance and rock concert—and sensory overload, of the best kind possible.

MUSICA ELETTRONICA VIVA (A

Western Front presentation) With a combined age of 233, electronic-music pioneers Frederic Rzewski, Alvin Curran, and Richard Teitelbaum could reasonably rest on their laurels. Instead, in a hotly anticipated Western Front concert, they delivered a full-on assault of sonic shape-shifting that never once turned predictable. The wildly diverse crowd—which ranged from teenage EDM producers to former students of the stars—recognized that it was getting a lesson in how to stay forever young. -

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Exhibition Opening November 17, 7–9 pm Free Admission MEDIA SPONSOR

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Museum of Anthropology at UBC A place of world arts + cultures 36 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

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ARTS

Cirque’s ode to Avatar is video-game immersive TH E AT RE TORUK: THE FIRST FLIGHT Written and directed by Michel Lemieux and Victor Pilon. Creative direction by Neilson Vignola. Inspired

by James Cameron’s Avatar. A Cirque du Soleil production. At the Pacific Coliseum on Wednesday, December 14. No remaining performances

The technology is the star.

The First Flight has all the visceral thrills that audiences have come to expect from Cirque du Soleil, but its simulated environment dwarfs the physical virtuosity of its performers.

Inspired by James Cameron’s film Avatar, TORUK is set on that film’s moon, Pandora, populated by humanoid creatures with blue skin and tails. The world of Pandora is video-game immersive, as directors Michel Lemieux and Victor Pilon use sophisticated mechanics coupled with multimedia projections to seamlessly transform the landscape of the massive set, creating forests, waterfalls, or caverns, depending on the scene.

And unlike many of Cirque’s previous shows, where story is often secondary to spectacle, TORUK puts narrative front and centre. At the top of the show, a Storyteller (Raymond O’Neill) introduces Ralu and Entu, adoptive brothers on the cusp of manhood, who must enlist the help of the deadly Toruk (a massive flying creature) to save their clan’s Tree of Souls. Their quest requires them to collect talismans from four neighbouring clans, not all of whom are sympathetic to their mission.

This framework offers opportunities for some brilliant acrobatics, but the emphasis is on the characters’ otherworldly surroundings, including Patrick Martel’s huge puppets of Pandora’s various fauna. Drummers

2 TORUK:

In TORUK, the acrobatic virtuosity is sometimes dwarfed by the simulated digital environment. Errisson Lawrence photo.

levitate in a ring; warriors writhe and dangle from motorized poles or dance and contort on a skeleton that moves like an enormous seesaw. In one of the evening’s most visually sumptuous scenes, performers do a sort of grandscale fan dance that fills the space with enormous, luminous flower petals.

Alain Lortie’s lighting enhances the magic of Lemieux and Pilon’s projections. The floating seeds of the Tree of Souls and the starry night sky offer simple delights in a show that sometimes threatens to overwhelm the senses. And it’s hard to overlook

“A MUST-SEE!” — Broadway World LA

“YOU HAVE TO SEE IT TO BELIEVE IT. Spectacular—absolutely the greatest of the great! Really out of this world!

There is no word to describe it ... if I had to, the words might be ‘divine,’ ‘reborn,’ and ‘hope.’ ”

— Christine Walevska, master cellist, renowned as the “Cello Goddess”

POTTED POTTER

the production’s queasiness-inducing saturation with globetrotting indigenous stereotypes, most noticeable in Kym Barrett’s costumes and makeup and Bob and Bill’s generically “tribal” music.

The show’s privileging of technology extends to the audience: there’s a TORUK app that you can download on your smartphone, allowing you to contribute to visual effects at certain points in the show. We’re not in the big top anymore—but it’s still pretty mind-blowing.

By Daniel Clarkson and Jefferson Turner. Directed, with additional material, by Richard Hurst. A presentation of Corey Ross/Starvox Entertainment and James Seabright for Potted Productions. At the Vogue Theatre on Tuesday, December 13.

Continues until December 24

I know some young folks who’ve

2 read all seven Harry Potter books

multiple times, and others who find them too scary to read even one. In the > KATHLEEN OLIVER hands of these two Brits, the novels are

not only defanged; they become a wellspring of hilarious nonsense.

You don’t need to be intimately familiar with J.K. Rowling’s series to appreciate the playful mayhem of this show. Joseph Maudsley and James Percy fill the roles of originators Daniel Clarkson and Jefferson Turner, who created and performed its first incarnation 10 years ago. Joe and James are a classic comedy duo: James is the exasperated expert saddled with an incompetent but charming assistant.

In this case, Joe hasn’t come through with the 20 Hollywood A-listers he was supposed to hire to perform this radically abbreviated dramatization of all seven Potter books, so the two are left to do the show alone with nothing but a minimalist set, some cheap wigs, and a few stuffed toys. Oh, and on top of that, Joe hasn’t even read the books!

The script mixes up its approach to the various novels, so it never gets dull: we have brief scenes, a multimedia presentation, even an extended disco song, along with lots of (nonthreatening) audience participation. On opening night, the live Quidditch match was brought to a decisive close when a volunteer from the audience, a girl who looked to be about nine, tackled James, in the role of the golden snitch, and brought him right to the floor.

Maudsley and Percy are gifted improvisers who interact beautifully with the audience, taking obvious joy in the unexpected and the unpredictable. Their charisma and their chemistry are a huge part of the show’s success. And the humour, which gently mocks Rowling’s books (“Dumbledore is the greatest wizard who ever lived, and he’s chosen to go into teaching?”) while gleefully tossing in references to other kids’ classics like The Hobbit, is truly suitable for all ages.

My nine-year-old, who’s only read the first book, laughed his head off. So did his parents. Recommended. > KATHLEEN OLIVER

VSO POPS:

ELLIS HALL SOUL UNLIMITED A TRIBUTE TO RAY CHARLES AND OTHER MUSICAL GREATS!

Queen Elizabeth Theatre

JAN 29-31

Tickets: ShenYun.com/Van

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ALL-NEW 2017 SHOW WITH LIVE ORCHESTRA MADE IN U.S.A. “5,000 “5 5,000 YEARS OF MUSIC AND DANCE, IN ONE NIGHT!”— New York Times

Perfect Holiday Gift “The top! Mind-blowing ...

I have reviewed over 4,000 shows, none can compare to what I saw tonight."

Richard Connema, Renowned Broadway critic

“It was an extraordinary experience for us and the children.

The level of skill, but also the power of the archetypes and the narratives were startling. And of course it was exquisitely beautiful.”

Cate Blanchett, A show you must see at least once in your life!

FRIDAY & SATURDAY, JANUARY 6 & 7 8PM, ORPHEUM John Morris Russell conductor

Ellis Hall Singers

Superstar vocalist and instrumentalist Ellis Hall channels the greats in an amazing concert that celebrates Motown and soul music. Get your groove on to classics by Stevie Wonder, Marvin Gaye, the Temptations, Earth, Wind & Fire, Otis Redding, and of course, the great Ray Charles.

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TICKETS:

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604.876.3434

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 37

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Veda Hille (left) and Caroline Shaw were two of the musicians who journeyed from darkness to light in Music for a Winter Solstice. Jan Gates photo.

Music on Main conjures wintry solstice magic Local performers bring to life works that manage to be seasonal without making aesthetic compromise M U S IC MUSIC FOR THE WINTER SOLSTICE

VANCOUVER SPECIAL DEC 3, 2016 – APR 17, 2017 Derya Akay

Colleen Heslin

Ryan Peter

Maya Beaudry

Julian Hou

Sylvain Sailly

Raymond Boisjoly

Allison Hrabluik

Rachelle Sawatsky

Eli Bornowsky

Gareth James

Walter Scott

Rebecca Brewer

Garry Neill Kennedy

Krista Belle Stewart

Colleen Brown

Tiziana La Melia

Angela Teng

Matt Browning

Khan Lee

Mina Totino

Mark Delong

Arvo Leo

Ron Tran

Kim Dorland

Lyse Lemieux

Tristan Unrau

Barry Doupé

Glenn Lewis

Charlene Vickers

Michael Drebert

Anne Low

Brent Wadden

Julia Feyrer

Elizabeth McIntosh

Alison Yip

Jeneen Frei Njootli

Jordan Milner

Tamara Henderson

Antoni Oko

Generously supported by:

A Music on Main production. At Heritage Hall on Thursday, December 15. No remaining performances

Sometimes what you bring into

2 a concert is almost as import-

ant as what you take away.

Just prior to leaving for Thursday’s sold-out edition of Music on Main’s annual solstice gala, I had been reading Robert Macfarlane’s The Old Ways, a vibrant meditation on walking, thinking, and landscape. During several of his journeys—voyages of both the body and the mind—the author takes us close to Neolithic burial sites, often called barrows. Their entrances, he notes, are commonly aligned with astronomical phenomena, especially the path of the sun’s rays as it rises on winter or summer solstice.

So I was already prepared to accept Music for the Winter Solstice as a journey from darkness into light, as MoM artistic director David Pay intimated in his introductory remarks, and the program did not disappoint.

I’ll go even further: Thursday’s concert took us right into the heart of the barrow—a place of fear, spectres, confusion, and grief—and delivered us into a glorious sunrise. That we then stepped outside into a world of crisp, shining crystal only made it all the more magical.

Magical, yes, but not perfect. On opening night, some of the performers needed a little time to settle in.

Veda Hille, who does not often sing art song in public, was noticeably pitchy on Alfredo Santa Ana’s MoM– commissioned “A Short Song for the Longest Night of the Year”. Guitarist

Adrian Verdejo was occasionally stiff in his negotiation of the fingertwisting stretches demanded by John Mark Sherlock’s Musiquita.

But these early frailties only played up the heroic nature of making art—making contact, really—in dark and uncertain times. By the time violinist Caroline Shaw and pianist Rachel Kiyo Iwaasa ventured into Arvo Pärt’s Spiegel im Spiegel we were ready for warmth and comfort, and the two musicians delivered with an impeccable rendering of one of the loveliest works in the modernist canon.

More delights followed. Rodney Sharman’s brand-new for Guitar took a simple guitaristic gesture— a half-step slide up the neck—and made it the focus of a perpetually surprising piece that Verdejo, its dedicatee, premiered with aplomb.

Hille introduced romantic love and physical ecstasy into the mix with her giddy and gorgeous “Let Me Die”, from the hit musical Onegin, and then reinforced the night’s into-the-underworld subtext with “Eurydice”, originally penned for MoM’s The Orpheus Project. And with its intentionally haphazard power chords, droning repetitions, and winking air of decadence, new MoM composer in residence Nicole Lizée’s “Solstice Noir”, another premiere, came off as the great lost Brian Eno carol.

Some of us laughed, and then some of us cried during the sing-along benediction that is Shaw’s “Winter Carol”, an invitation to love that is as openhearted as the night sky it invokes. For the third time in as many years, Music on Main has delivered solstice magic—and seasonally themed entertainment without aesthetic compromise. > ALEXANDER VARTY

Supporting Sponsor:

Artworkers Retirement Society Chan Family Foundation Phil Lind Michael O’Brian Family Foundation

BCCHF.CA

38 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

PLEASE DONATE.

BC

CHILDREN’S

HOSPITAL

that investigates the Afghan war through the eyes of three Canadian medical personnel. Jan 10-21, Vancity Culture Lab (the Cultch, 1895 Venables). Tix $35, info www.thecultch.com/.

ar ts/ timeout

CUISINE AND CONFESSIONS Théâtre la Seizième presents Montreal-based theatre company Les 7 Doigts in a medley of theatre, dance, and circus. Jan 25-29, Vancouver Playhouse (600 Hamilton). Tix $45-60, info www.seizieme.ca/saison/ cuisine-confessions/.

2ONGOING THEATRE DANCE MUSIC COMEDY LITERARY EVENTS ET CETERA GALLERIES MUSEUMS OUT OF TOWN

< < < < < < < < <

THEATRE 2JUST ANNOUNCED THE FIGHTING SEASON Bleeding Heart Theatre presents Sean Harris Oliver’s play

A CHARLIE BROWN CHRISTMAS Carousel Theatre for Young People presents a stage adaptation of the holiday classic. Includes live music by a jazz trio. To Dec 31, Waterfront Theatre (1412 Cartwright St., Granville Island). Tix $35/29/18, info www.carouseltheatre.ca/ production/a-charlie-brown-christmas/.

don’t miss out!

For up-to-the-minute, searchable Arts Time Out listings, visit

www.straight.com

AVENUE Q The Arts Club Theatre Company presents the musical story of Princeton, a bright-eyed college graduate who arrives in New York City looking for love, a job, and his purpose in life. To Dec 31, Granville Island Stage (1585 Johnston, Granville Island). Tix from $29, info www.artsclub.com/.

EAST VAN PANTO: LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD Theatre Replacement presents a pantomime in which Little Red Riding Hood bombs down the Adanac bike trail to deliver a basket of goodies to her granny, while battling bike thieves, distracted drivers, and the Big Bad Wolf. To Dec 31, York Theatre (639 Commercial). Tix from $20, info www.thecultch.com/events/ an-east-van-panto-little-red-riding-hood/.

THE DAY BEFORE CHRISTMAS The Arts Club Theatre Company presents the premiere of a play by Stacey Kaser and Alison Kelly about a perfectionist who is desperately juggling family and work as she attempts to create the perfect Christmas. To Dec 24, Goldcorp Stage at the BMO Theatre Centre (162 W. 1st). Tix from $29, info www.artsclub.com/.

HOLY MO! A CHRISTMAS SHOW! Pacific Theatre presents director Kerry van der Griend’s irreverent re-imagining of the Nativity story. To Dec 31, 8-10 pm, Pacific Theatre (1440 W. 12th). Tix $34.95, info www. pacifictheatre.org/season/2016-2017-season/ mainstage/holy-mo-a-christmas-show/.

MARY POPPINS The Arts Club Theatre Company presents a musical based on the stories of P.L. Travers and the Walt Disney film. Includes songs like “A Spoonful of Sugar” and “Chim Chim Cheree”. To Jan 1, Stanley Industrial Alliance Stage (2750 Granville). Tix from $29, info www.artsclub.com/.

ROBIN HOOD AND MARION Writerdirector Catherine Morrison’s panto tells the slightly altered story of Robin Hood and his mostly merry band of outlaws in Sherwood Forest and Lady Marion with her ladies of the court. To Jan 7, 7:30 pm, Metro Theatre (1370 SW Marine). Tix $27/24/17, info www.metrotheatre.com/.

2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS THE (POST) MISTRESS Tomson Highway’s play tells the story of a charismatic postal worker in the fictional town of Lovely, who seems to know everything about everyone.

An Arts Club on Tour Production. Jan 7, 8 pm, BlueShore Financial Centre for the Performing Arts (2055 Purcell Way). Tix $43/39/20, info www.capilanou.ca/centre/.

STOMP The eight-member troupe uses everything but conventional percussion instruments to fill the stage with rhythms and routines. Jan 13-15, Queen Elizabeth Theatre (650 Hamilton). Tix from $55, info www.stomponline.com/.

DANCE 2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS LES BALLETS TROCKADERO DE MONTE CARLO The American all-male drag ballet corps parodies the conventions and clichés of romantic and classical ballet.

Jan 20-21, Queen Elizabeth Theatre (650 Hamilton). Tix from $29 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ticketstonight.ca/.

MUSIC 2JUST ANNOUNCED SALUTE TO VIENNA NEW YEAR’S CONCERT New program features Strauss waltzes and melodies from operettas performed by a full orchestra, European singers, and ballroom and ballet dancers.

Jan 1, 2:30-5 pm, Orpheum Theatre (601 Smithe). Tix from $58, info www.vancou versymphony.ca/concert/16SPEC07/.

DIRTSONG An evening of music, song, and film by Australian indigenous ensemble Black Arm Band. Part of the PuSh International Performing Arts Festival.

Feb 4, 8 pm, Queen Elizabeth Theatre (650 Hamilton). Tix from $25, info www.push festival.ca/.

see next page

THE VSO NEW MUSIC FESTIVAL An exploration of new creations and contemporary composers. Join us for an exciting Festival experience with music that is new, vital, current, and on the cutting edge! Concerts hosted by Maestro Bramwell Tovey and VSO Composer-in-Residence Jocelyn Morlock.

PRESENTS

POST-CONCERT MIX AND MINGLE in the lobby, featuring live DJ and cash bar, immediately following the Orpheum concerts.

BRAMWELL TOVEY VSO MUSIC DIRECTOR

UBC UNIVERSITY SINGERS

STANDING WAVE

PACIFIC BAROQUE ORCHESTRA

1: HARD RUBBER ORCHESTRA TUESDAY, JANUARY 24 7:30PM ORPHEUM

The Hard Rubber Orchestra takes you on a genre-smashing journey through new creations, led by composer, bandleader and trumpeter John Korsrud.

(MONTRÉAL) WORKS BY FONIADAKIS, GALILI AND PEDERNEIRAS

2: NEW MUSIC FOR OLD INSTRUMENTS I WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 25 7:30PM CHRIST CHURCH CATHEDRAL

Join harpsichordist Alexander Weimann and friends at Christ Church Cathedral for part one of a new and unique concept concert: an exploration of new music on Baroque instruments, presented by Early Music Vancouver.

3: PURE PIANO THURSDAY, JANUARY 26 8:30PM ORPHEUM

Four of the most incredible contemporary music pianists in the country, each with a very distinctive style, come together in this unique and exciting concert to explore the outer limits and musical possibilities of the keyboard.

4: REQUIEM FOR A GENERATION

“ADDICTIVE.” THE GLOBE & MAIL

FRIDAY, JANUARY 27 7:30PM ORPHEUM

Maestro Tovey, the VSO, and the assembled choirs perform -H΍UH\ 5\DQȇV sublime Afghanistan: Requiem for a Generation, created with Canada’s War Poet in Afghanistan, Suzanne M. Steele. Glenn Buhr describes his new work Guernica 2017 as a musical rant against the way children are victimized by our wars.

5: NEW MUSIC FOR OLD INSTRUMENTS II SATURDAY, JANUARY 28 7:30PM CHRIST CHURCH CATHEDRAL

TICKETS FROM

6: ON A WIRE

FEBRUARY 24 & 25 2017, 8PM VANCOUVER PLAYHOUSE

Join the 3DFLȴF %DURTXH 2UFKHVWUD at Christ Church Cathedral for the second part of a new and unique concept concert: an exploration of new music on Baroque instruments, presented by Early Music Vancouver.

SUNDAY, JANUARY 29 7:30PM ORPHEUM

Bramwell Tovey and the VSO join forces with Standing Wave in an eclectic and wide-ranging new music performance. @VSOrchestra

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604.876.3434 DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 39

(Wed, Thu, and Fri, 7:30 pm); TheatreSports (Fri, 9:30 pm); 2016 Year in Review (Mon and Tue, 7:30 pm; Tue, 9:15 pm). Dec 21-28, The Improv Centre (1502 Duranleau, Granville Island). Info www.vtsl.com/.

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SWEET SOUL GOSPEL CHRISTMAS 2016 Checo Tohomaso and the VOC Sweet Soul Gospel Choir present a holiday concert of soul, gospel, R&B, jazz, Hawaiian, calypso, and reggae music. Dec 22, 7:30 pm, St. Andrewâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;sâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Wesley United Church (1022 Nelson). Tix $20/15/10/kids under nine free, info www.vocsoulgospelchoir.com/.

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www.yukyuks.com 2837 Cambie (at 12th)

at York Theatre, Scotiabank Dance Centre, and Biltmore Cabaret. Tix $23-50 (plus service charges and fees), info www.chutz pahfestival.com/.

2THIS WEEK YOUTH POETRY SLAM Poets perform their own poetry without props or costumes or musical accompaniment. This monthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s guest feature is Ronnie Dean Harris. Dec 28, 8 pm, CafĂŠ Deux Soleils (2096 Commercial). Tix $4-10, info www.vanslam.ca/.

CHRISTMAS QUEEN 3: THE BACHELORETTE EDITION The Vancouver TheatreSports League presents an improv show that sees the titular character star in her own reality-TV show as she looks for love with Elf on a Shelf, Jack Frost, Scrooge, 2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS the Grinch, and even Santa. To Dec 23, The THE MOTH Performance by the nonprofit Improv Centre (1502 Duranleau, Granville organization dedicated to the art and Island). Info www.vtsl.com/. craft of storytelling. May 20, doors 7 pm, ADAM PATEMAN Vancouver comedian, show 8 pm, Vogue Theatre (918 Granville). actor, and writer performs a solo standup Tix $45 (plus service charges and fees) at show. Dec 22-23, The Comedy MIX (1015 www.livenation.com/.

Burrard). Tix $18/15, info www.thecomedy mix.com/.

ET CETERA

2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS CARMINA BURANA The Vancouver Bach Choir presents Carl Orffâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s theatrical cantata, Doveâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s The Passing of the Year, and Bergmannâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tubular Bells. Includes performances by the Bergmann Piano Duo and Fringe Percussion. Feb 25, 8 pm, Orpheum Theatre (601 Smithe). Tix from $29, info www.vancouverbachchoir.com/.

YEAR IN REVIEW The Vancouver TheatreSports League presents an improvcomedy show inspired by the stories that made the headlines in past year. Dec 26-31, The Improv Centre (1502 Duranleau, Granville Island). Info www.vtsl.com/.

COMEDY 2JUST ANNOUNCED

TOP TALENT SHOWCASE

LITERARY EVENTS

2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS

MARC MARON American comedian, podcaster, writer, actor, musician, director, THE FIGHTER AND THE KID LIVE Live and producer performs on his Too Real presentation of the weekly podcast feaTour. Mar 26, doors 6:30 pm, show 7:30 pm, turing former UFC heavyweight Brendan Vogue Theatre (918 Granville). Tix $35.50 â&#x20AC;&#x153;Big Brownâ&#x20AC;? Schaub and actor-comedian (plus service charges and fees) at Bryan Callen. Jan 18-19, doors 8 pm, www.ticketfly.com/. show 9 pm, Commodore Ballroom (868 Granville). Tix for Jan 19 show SOLD OUT. BIANCA DEL RIO American actor, insult Tix for Jan 18 show $25 (plus service charcomedian, costume designer, and drag ges and fees) at www.livenation.com/. queen performs on her Not Today Satan Tour. May 19, doors 7 pm, Vogue Theatre JFL NORTHWEST Comedy festival fea(918 Granville). Tix $49.50-249 (plus service tures performances by Sarah Silverman, charges and fees) at www.ticketfly.com/.

Trevor Noah, Chris Dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Elia, Iliza, Tom Segura, Brian Posehn, Jon Dore, Nate Bargatze, 2ONGOING Aparna Nancherla, K. Trevor Wilson, Jim Gaffigan, Colin Quinn, Michelle Wolf, Todd THE COMEDY MIX 1015 Burrard, Century Glass, and Barry Crimmins. Other program Plaza Hotel & Spa, 604-684-5050, www. highlights include SiriusXMâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Top Comic thecomedymix.com/. Comedy club with Showcase, Comedy Short Shorts, Piff the pro-am night Tue at 8:30 pm, showcase Magic Dragon, My Favorite Murder, the Wed at 8:30 pm, and featured headliners Just for Laughs Showcase, and the Best of Thu at 8:30 pm and Fri-Sat at 8 and 10:30 the West Series, which showcases local pm. Cover $8 Tue, $10 Wed, $15 Thu, $18 comic talent. Feb 16-25, various Vancouver Fri, $20 Sat. 2ADAM PATEMAN Dec 22-23 venues. Tix at www.jflnorthwest.com/.

2NYE TRIPLE HEADER Dec 31 2BRENT WHOSE LIVE ANYWAY Comedians MORIN Jan 12-14 2SCOTT THOMPSON Ryan Stiles, Greg Proops, Jeff Davis, and Jan 26-28 2NIKKI GLAZER Feb 3-4 2BRIAN Joel Murray perform improv games from POSEHN Feb 16-18 2JON DORE Feb 24-25 the Emmy-nominated TV series Whose YUK YUKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S COMEDY CLUB 2837 Line Is It Anyway?. Feb 26, 7:30 pm, River Cambie, 604-696-9857, www.yukyuks.com/ Rock Casino (8811 River Rd., Richmond). vancouver. Comedy club with Top Talent Tix $54.50/49.50 (plus service charges and Tue at 8 pm, amateur night Wed at 8 pm, fees) at www.riverrock.com/. and professional headliners Thu-Fri at 8 SEBASTIAN MANISCALCO American pm and Sat at 7 and 9:30 pm. Cover Tue standup comedian performs on his $10, Wed $7, Thu $10, and Fri-Sat $20.

Why Would You Do That Tour. Mar 11, 6 VANCOUVER THEATRESPORTS LEAGUE pm, Vogue Theatre (918 Granville). Tix Some of the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most daring and $250/59.75/49.75 (plus service charges and fees) at www.voguetheatre.com/. innovative improv. Christmas Queen 3

2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS ITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S JUST DRAG! Joan-E and Shanda Leer host an evening featuring Roxxy Andrews and Naomi Smalls (from RuPaulâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Drag Race), along with 30 local performers. Jan 13, doors 8 pm, show 9 pm, Commodore Ballroom (868 Granville). Tix $30 (plus service charges and fees) at www.livenation.com/.

SHEN YUN Touring production combines ancient legends, technological innovations, historically authentic costumes, and animated backdrops with classical Chinese dancing and orchestral music. Jan 29-31, Queen Elizabeth Theatre (650 Hamilton).

Tix $85-179 (plus service charges and fees), info www.shenyun.com/van.

2017 PUSH INTERNATIONAL PERFORMING ARTS FESTIVAL The 13th annual celebration of groundbreaking theatre, dance, music, and multimedia art features artists from 11 countries.

Highlights include an all-star Australian indigenous band, South Korean performance art, Bavarian folk dancers, and participatory recitation from Portugal. Jan 16â&#x20AC;&#x201C;Feb 5, 2017, various Vancouver venues.

Tix $10-103, info www.pushfestival.ca/.

ODYSSEO Cavalia presents a multimedia performance that uses equestrian arts, stage arts, and high-tech theatrical effects to examine the century-old relationship between human and horse. Jan 29â&#x20AC;&#x201C;Feb 19, 2017, Under the white big top at Olympic Village. Tix $29.50-204.50 (plus service charges and fees), info www.cavalia.net/.

17TH ANNUAL CHUTZPAH! FESTIVAL Celebration of Jewish performing arts features dance, theatre, comedy, and music by local, Canadian, and international artists.

Feb 16â&#x20AC;&#x201C;Mar 13, 2017, Norman Rothstein Theatre (950 W. 41st). The event also runs

GALLERIES VANCOUVER ART GALLERY 750 Hornby, 604-662-4719, www.vanartgallery.bc.ca/.

2STARE (exhibition features photographic works that evoke a fixed and concentrated gaze on the part of artist and viewer) to Jan 22 2WALKER EVANS: DEPTH OF FIELD (exhibition features more than 200 black-and-white and colour prints from the 1920s through to the 1970s) to Jan 22 2VANCOUVER SPECIAL: AMBIVALENT PLEASURES (exhibition encompasses a range of approaches and reinvigorated explorations of surrealism, abstraction, atemporality, and conceptual practices) to Apr 17 2JUXTAPOZ X SUPERFLAT (exhibition offers a unique insight into contemporary art and its place in cultural life) to Feb 5

MUSEUMS THE MUSEUM OF ANTHROPOLOGY AT UBC 6393 NW Marine Drive, 604822-5087, www.moa.ubc.ca/. 2IN THE FOOTPRINT OF THE CROCODILE MAN: CONTEMPORARY ART OF THE SEPIK RIVER, PAPUA NEW GUINEA (exhibition features the carvings of Papua New Guineaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Iatmul people) to Jan 31 2LAYERS OF INFLUENCE: UNFOLDING CLOTH ACROSS CULTURES (exhibition features more than 130 diverse cultural garments, from Japanese kimonos, to colourful Indian saris, to the elaborate feather cloaks of the Maori people of Aotearoa/New Zealand) to Apr 9

OUT OF TOWN 2THIS WEEK INTERSECTIONS: CONTEMPORARY ARTIST FILMS By transforming the traditional white cube exhibition spaces into a series of film/video rooms, the Audain Art Museum will provide its visitors with a different way in which to explore and experience experimental and contemporary films and videos. To Feb 6, Audain Art Museum (4350 Blackcomb Way, Whistler).

Info www.audainartmuseum.com/.

TIME OUT ARTS LISTINGS are a public service provided free of charge, based on available space and editorial discretion. We canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t guarantee inclusion, and we give priority to events taking place within one week of publication.

Submit listings online using the event-submission form at straight.com/AddEvent. Events that donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make it into the paper due to space constraints will appear on the website.

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0D\ QRW EH XVHG LQ FRQMXQFWLRQ ZLWK RWKHU RIIHUV 2IIHU H[SLUHV )(%58$5< 40 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; JANUARY 5 / 2017

MOVIES

It is a period

of great unrest. Rebel spaceships, striking from their monolithic corporate base in California, have managed to steal the secret plans to the Empire’s ultimate weapon, the Death Star—again. Filmgoers would be forgiven for a crushing sense of déjà vu. As the Imperial Senate subsequently rakes in yet more millions with the same plot it used 40 years ago, a quick glance at this year’s top-grossing movies is no more inspiring, revealing the dreariest roll call of remakes, reboots, and sequels on record (plus Sausage Party). And yet, even in a world where Suicide Squad is allowed to roam free, we’ve managed to muster 28 good reasons to keep your faith in the magic-lantern show we call the movies, as the Georgia Straight offers its annual roundup of the year’s best in cinema. All box-office numbers aside, here is a new hope that the true rogues won, and always will.

KEN EISNER

I don’t necessarily expect to find deep-tissue

2 connections between my year-end choices,

but this time I did notice that my faves all make notable use of sparely applied and exceedingly offbeat musical scores to set them apart from the Hollywood herd.

It doesn’t hit every note perfectly, but Barry Jenkins’s sophomore outing comes at the right moment and achieves something no one else has tried: it carries you deep inside the soul of

MOONLIGHT

The year in reviewers

Don’t be fooled by a disdainful Kim Min-hee: The Handmaiden was one of only three movies listed as the year’s best by multiple Georgia Straight film critics.

OLD STONE For his feature debut (also called Lao Shi), young Vancouverite Johnny Ma made this unexpectedly naturalistic, yet subtly surrealistic look at the limits Our critics look back on the best movies of 2016, when a plucky band of smaller films took on the Empire and won. of the social compact in an increasingly capitalistic mainsomeone growing up poor, black, and (probably) land China. If nothing else, this tale of mounting gay in a forgotten corner of Miami. insurance (and moral) costs will discourage visitors from driving automobiles in the PRC. ELLE/THINGS TO COME French superstar Isabelle Huppert assays similar yet contrasting OUR LITTLE SISTER Japan’s Hirokazu Koreroles as two middle-aged academics weighing eda (After Life; Like Father, Like Son) goes from their Parisian comforts against darker, more ur- strength to strength. And this manga-based gent needs. Directed by a rejuvenated Paul Ver- tale of three very unlike sisters who upend their hoeven (yes, the RoboCop guy), Huppert’s kinky staid rural lives to incorporate a daughter their father had on the side is his strongest yet. Until Elle opens in January. the next one.

MANCHESTER BY THE SEA You Can Count on Me director Kenneth Lonergan continues SPA NIGHT First-time writer-director Andrew his study of troubled family dynamics in the Ahn makes L.A.’s Koreatown a character—someleisurely look at a Massachusetts ne’er-do-well times loving, occasionally unforgiving—in his tale (Casey Aff leck) who sort of rises to the chal- of a first-generation son struggling with mixedmessage immigrant expectations. Content aside, lenge of multiple tragedies. it’s a marvel of digital ingenuity and colour-soaked 20TH CENTURY WOMEN Annette Bening rules mood-setting. in this 1979-set, mostly comic tale of a single mom running a SoCal boarding house filled with so- CAMERAPERSON Assembled from personal cial stragglers, all coping with changes in gender projects and B-roll from the many tough docunorms. Director Mike Mills, who told his father’s mentaries she has shot over the years, this clever story in Beginners, displays some of the formal mosaic reads as a visual autobiography by veteran whimsy of his wife, Miranda July, but with more cinematographer Kirsten Johnson (who also shot Citizenfour and The Invisible War). approachable warmth. Opens in January.

LOVE & FRIENDSHIP Kate Beckinsale plays an

oddly lovable villain in this nimble and delightfully verbose take on Jane Austen from writer-director Whit Stillman, who previously took aim at WASPy American aristocracy in Woody Allen–esque films like Metropolitan and The Last Days of Disco.

WEEK IN WIDESCREEN

TOWER The animated effort of the year is Keith

Maitland’s cleverly rotoscoped interpretation of interviews with witnesses looking back at the summer of 1966, when Charles Whitman took a rifle to the highest point of Austin’s University of Texas campus, setting in motion a legacy of mass

2 Belle ESSENTIAL CINEMA! Beginning Thursday (December 22) with Ingmar Bergman’s peerless Fanny and Alexander and running until December 30, the Essential Cinema! series brings four classics back to the Cinematheque’s big screen, where they belong.

Other titles include Jean Cocteau’s Beauty and the Beast, Franco Zeffirelli’s Romeo and Juliet, and Alfred Hitchcock’s To Catch a Thief.

Visit www.cinematheque.ca/ for dates and times. -

3

JANET SMITH

Sci-fi movies, disaster flicks, horror, and

2 cops and robbers: the best films of the year

upended genres as well as expectations. And they provided a great escape from the black comedy that was going on in the real world.

HELL OR HIGH WATER A wild mix of a mod-

ern western and heist movie, where the biggest villain is the American economy—the one where banks are the real robbers. Jeff Bridges kills it as a wizened ranger, as dry and hardened as the sunbaked West Texas backdrop.

ARRIVAL Denis Villeneuve brings strange new atmosphere and intelligence to the alien movie.

Tentacled, B-movie heptapods serve as the unlikely leaping-off point for big questions about the universe and mankind’s ability to get along. And Amy Adams grounds it all in a deeply human sadness and empathy that make her a sort of anti-Ripley.

Korean maverick Park Chan-Wook does it again, with a playful erotic thriller where nothing is as it seems. Under every pretty surface is a darker, more twisted and unrepentantly perverted reality. It’s a puzzle box with imagery so painterly, it practically drips.

THE HANDMAIDEN

MANCHESTER BY THE SEA An aching study

of grief and familial love, served up as unsentimentally as the gritty fishing village it plays out in.

Watching characters and relationships evolve here, you’ll see some of the strongest, most palpably authentic performances of the year. And weirdly, you’ll laugh, too. see next page

MOVIES

The projector

1

shootings that ended up defining far too much of what America is today

What to see and where to see it

The Stranger Song

HUMAN Gobsmacking aerial views of life on

Earth mingle with unforgettable accounts of what it is to be human in Yann Arthus-Bertrand’s epic doc, praised by the Straight’s Craig Takeuchi as “indelible”, and starting at the Vancity Theatre on Thursday (December 22). Visit Straight.com for our review.

ROCKY The Rio Theatre celebrates Boxing

Day (December 26, if you need the reminder) with a marathon screening of the first four Rocky movies (boxing, geddit?), starting with the 1976 chestnut that launched Sylvester Stallone into the stratosphere and ending with 1985’s much sillier Rocky IV.

MCCABE & MRS. MILLER Warren Beatty strolls into town (an exceedingly wintry North Vancouver, as it happens) looking to open a brothel, but he doesn’t reckon on Julie Christie’s hardAndrew Dominik’s acclaimed doc about the headed madam, Mrs. Miller, or a scene-stealing Hugh Millais as a recording of the Bad Seeds’ Skeleton Tree killer hired by mining interests. The Vancity Theatre’s screening of album—made in the wake of the death of Nick this masterful “anti-western” from 1971 is in celebration of Leonard Cave’s 15-year-old son, Arthur—gets a rare and Cohen’s score, without which Robert Altman’s finest moment (no, precious encore screening at the Vancity Theatre really) wouldn’t be half the film it is. See it next Sunday (January 1) next Thursday (December 29). and Tuesday (January 3). DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 41 ONE MORE TIME WITH FEELING

The year in reviewers

that hit you in a more primal place than jump scares.

HUNT FOR THE WILDERPEOPLE

JACKIE The assassination of John F. Kennedy and all the photos and film around it are so etched on the collective consciousness that Chilean director Pablo Larraín does the smart thing: he forgets about doing a traditional biopic. Instead, he focuses his camera intensely on the woman at the centre of it all and takes her story into a heightened, dreamlike realm that evokes the mythology around Camelot.

from previous page

Taika Waititi dodges all clichés in his offbeat tale of a rap- and haikuobsessed foster kid who ends up on the run with a crusty outdoorsman in the New Zealand wilderness. Big laughs, deep humanity, and Kiwi quirks galore.

THE WAVE Epically named Norwegian director Roar Uthaug reinvents the disaster movie, pitting an impossibly picturesque fjord village against a giant wall of water. Frantically edited underwater carnage takes action to teeth-clenching new heights.

ADRIAN MACK

Of all the films listed below, even

2 the most orthodox is a portrait

UNDER THE SUN This eerie look

of a filmmaker who has relentlessly tested the boundaries of the HollyPatrick Stewart engages in a little ultraviolence as a white supremacist leader in the brutal punk horror flick Green Room. wood system. In one way or another, means we get to see citizens be- in its sly way, it could be the most and the way it manipulates male the rest are the work of artists no less aggression gets under your skin. It committed to dropping the gloves ing ordered to smile, but unable frightening film of the year. inhabits an all-too-Canadian world and exploding expectations. to mask the fear in their eyes. It’s all majestically shot, with tiny sub- HELLO DESTROYER Kevan Funk’s we usually never see on film: bleak jects dwarfed by monuments, and low-key, tightly shot look at hockey northern landscapes where futures THE CLUB In a remote seaside town, are limited. Through near-wordless five disgraced priests cool their jets scenes, Jared Abrahamson conveys while making barely perfunctory entire universes of pain as a minor- gestures toward contrition. Thrillleague enforcer, building an un- ingly gloomy and dead set on ambi® forgettable portrait of the scourge guity, this Chilean take on the crimes N O M I NAT I O N S of the Catholic Church proved to be of male depression. a little too elusive for most viewTHE WITCH The horror movie, ers, and axiomatically much more taken back to a spare, bone-chill- haunting than the sturdy but overing folk tale, all set in perfectly praised Spotlight.

BEST ACTOR CASEY AFFLECK rendered Puritan New England BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS MICHELLE WILLIAMS (actually the cold, skeletal woods GREEN ROOM The rare American BEST DIRECTOR KENNETH LONERGAN BEST SCREENPLAY KENNETH LONERGAN of prewinter northern Ontario). film that gets this particular miStrangling repression, infanticide, lieu right, or at least right enough, blood rituals, and a menacing goat Jeremy Saulnier’s thriller sends a ® named Black Phillip bring frights see next page

5

GOLDEN GLOBE

4 3

DRAMA

BEST PICTURE

DRAMA

inside the closed world of North Korea could easily be dismissed as a staged documentary, except that Russian director Vitaly Manskiy lets his camera linger longer than the omnipresent government officials would approve of. That

SCREEN ACTORS GUILD AWARDS

BEST ENSEMBLE BEST ACTOR CASEY AFFLECK N O M I NAT I O N S

4

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

WINNER

C R I T I C S ’ C H O I C E AWA R D S

BEST ACTOR CASEY AFFLECK BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY

BEST YOUNG ACTOR

KENNETH LONERGAN

LUCAS HEDGES

MICHELLE WILLIAMS

WINNER

NATIONAL BOARD OF REVIEW AWARDS

BEST PICTURE BEST ACTOR CASEY AFFLECK BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY

KENNETH LONERGAN

3

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR

BREAKTHROUGH PERFORMANCE, MALE

LUCAS HEDGES

LUCAS HEDGES

WINNER

NEW YORK FILM CRITICS CIRCLE AWARDS

BEST ACTOR CASEY AFFLECK BEST SCREENPLAY

KENNETH LONERGAN

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

MICHELLE WILLIAMS

ONE OF THE BEST FILMS OF THE YEAR .

“

WHAT A TRIUMPH FOR DENZEL WASHINGTON. VIOLA DAVIS IS HIS MATCH, IN AN OSCAR -WORTHY PORTRAYAL. YOU WON’T SEE PERFORMANCE FIREWORKS LIKE THIS ANYWHERE.” ®

“A MASTERPIECE.” “++++

THE BEST FILM OF THE YEAR!” 97%

PETER TRAVERS

C H R I S N A S H AWAT Y

“DENZEL WASHINGTON’S ADAPTATION OF AUGUST WILSON’S AWARD-WINNING ‘FENCES’ IS

A MASTER CLASS IN ACTING

.

WASHINGTON IS LIKE AN EXPOSED NERVE, AND VIOLA DAVIS DELIVERS A PERFORMANCE OF RADIANT WARMTH AND FEROCIOUS INTENSITY.”

ONE OF THE BEST FILMS OF THE YEAR

*AS OF 12/12/16

WINNER WINNER WINNER BEST ACTOR

BEST ACTOR

BEST ACTOR

CASEY AFFLECK CASEY AFFLECK CASEY AFFLECK ATLANTA FILM CRITICS SOCIETY G O T H A M AWA R D BOSTON SOCIETY OF FILM CRITICS

WINNER WINNER WINNER BEST ACTOR

BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

SAN FRANCISCO FILM CRITICS CIRCLE

BOSTON ONLINE FILM CRITICS ASSN.

CASEY AFFLECK KENNETH LONERGAN MICHELLE WILLIAMS WASHINGTON DC AREA FILM CRITICS

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down-at-heel, touring hardcore punk band into a remote nest of white supremacists in Oregon, where they make the never-wise move of opening their set with “Nazi Punks Fuck Off ”. We’ve definitely come a long way from the Fabulous Stains.

THE WAILING A supernatural horror made by true believers. No other movie this year followed me out of the theatre quite like this Korean humdinger in which a small town becomes the locus of a very real battle between good and evil, not to mention a vein of low comedy that shouldn’t work, but does. See? Miracles are real.

DE PALMA The exhausting job of

being a Brian De Palma fan gets the tribute it deserves in this simple but smartly assembled doc, in which the man himself walks us through a filmography that’s frequently as vexing as it is brilliant. Would an equivalent doc on any of De Palma’s more conventionally

A dangerous Samantha Robinson brews a heady spell in Anna Biller’s inspired feminist reboot of ’70s exploitation movies, The Love Witch .

successful contemporaries be this audience fatigue as a retirement-age Texas Ranger on the hunt for two smallmuch fun? Not even remotely. time bank robbers—all while reckonHELL OR HIGH WATER Jeff Bridg- ing with a postcrash redistribution of es snatches victory from the jaws of guilt. It feels like someone’s getting away

SINGLE BILL

with it when the American mainstream three-part tale—each with its own lets a movie as unblinkingly honest as twist ending—that’s both formally this one slip through the gate. dazzling and deeply kinky. I’m honestly not sure which of those two ANOTHER EVIL Looking like a bald, things made me hornier. overgrown baby, Mark Proksch turns in the performance of the year—ser- THE LOVE WITCH Working the iously—as an overbearing, often ag- gonzo flip side to Robert Eggers’s The gressive, always needy exorcist brought Witch, writer-director Anna Biller in to battle a J-horror-esque haunting puts the occult revival through her in suburban California. More of an ex- Something Weird Video filter and tended sketch than a film, but so gid- gooses the grindhouse crowd with a dily silly that I’ll be happy to rewatch devilishly clever feminist switcheroo. for the rest of my life, probably.

SHADOW WORLD The global arms THE INTERIOR A 20-something hip- trade and its enablers, from Reagan ster ditches his douchey advertising to Thatcher to Blair to Cheney to job in Toronto and sets out to get real Obama—and that’s just the western in the West Coast wilderness—where- wing of the industry—receives the upon The Interior, having been wildly raging howl of disgust it deserves audacious in its bid for laughs, becomes in Johan Grimonprez’s untouchable even more so in its attempt at scaring doc, which manages to organize a you shitless. A genuine original. staggering amount of material inside of 90 minutes, but also does it, THE HANDMAIDEN Korean genius hallelujah, with none of the hollow Park Chan-Wook turns his baroque journalistic “balance” that’s allowed sensibilities on the lesbian-themed the other side to run rampant for the novel Fingersmith and produces a last century or so. -

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Providing for the care and rehabilitation of injured, orphaned, and pollution damaged wildlife.

www.wildliferescue.ca DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 43

MOVIES ADVANCE SCREENING details at straight.com

Not going gaga over La La REV IEWS LA LA LAND Starring Emma Stone. Rated PG

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ingly light, so right for the moment that people can happily forgive it for not being very good.

As he proved with his hit Whiplash, young writer-director Damien Chazelle has tremendous enthusiasm for genres he poorly understands. That drum-tacular tale posited jazz as a solo act, built around a player who treats art like an Olympic competition. Despite the whimsical title, La La Land is similarly calisthenic, and now the strain is spread over elaborate dance duets, large-ensemble choreography, and both mechanical and digital special effects—all in Los Angeles settings recalling other, far better movies. The dude sure can spend money!

Some of that dough was well-placed on Ryan Gosling, who makes heavy lifting look easy. As “pure-jazz” pianist Sebastian, part of his hoisting here literally involves Emma Stone, applying her patented perkiness as Mia, the would-be actor and vaguely drawn character who comes to like Seb. He’s not interested, but their paths keep crossing. They have no chemistry, but hell, it’s in the script.

To get things moving, Chazelle has Seb fired from a Christmas Eve restaurant gig for not playing holiday standards straight. This has happened precisely nowhere, ever. Mild by any measure, his rhapsodic improvisations mesmerize Mia, who nonetheless declares that she hates jazz. So he takes her to a local club and proceeds to drown out the band with a hectoring speech about the importance of their music. (As in Whiplash, racial connotations are totally unexamined.)

Maybe these things wouldn’t matter—musicals are known for their senseless plots—if the songs on offer (with music by one Justin Hurwitz) had the slightest hint of jazz harmony or coloration. Instead, they are all wan ballads in the tuneless Les Mis tradition, with melodies only made memorable through constant repetition. The leads sing and dance well enough, in an effortful way, with none of the joie de vivre (or Cole Porter tunes) that made those Fred Astaire– Ginger Rogers movies worth copying.

Desperate times call for desperate measures, I suppose, and the retroworshipping La La Land is pleasant enough to watch. But our nostalgia provides most of the actual feeling. > KEN EISNER

BEING 17 Starring Kacey Mottet Klein. In French, with English subtitles. Rating unavailable

The thin line between love and

2 hate dissolves almost entirely in

Being 17, a deeply satisfying comingof-age and coming-out tale set at the picturesque foot of the Pyrenees by director André Téchiné. There’s little that jug-eared, middle-class Damien (Kacey Mottet Klein, Gainsbourg: A Heroic Life) and the willowy, adopted farm boy Thomas (newcomer Corentin Fila) share in common, besides being picked last for a school basketball game—a humiliation suffered by both boys in the film’s opening scene—and an inexplicable antipathy to one another that frequently explodes into violence. It must be love!

Working from a script coauthored by the significantly younger Céline Sciamma (whose Girlhood masterfully evoked the rhythms of modern youth), the 70-year-old Téchiné wants to capture adolescent lust in its dynamic equilibrium with confused rage, made even more complicated when it’s queer. “I don’t know if I’m into guys or just you,” Damien eventually confesses to Thomas, receiving a split lip for his troubles. That Téchiné achieves this goal with astonishing subtlety is beyond dispute, although it takes some heavy plot contrivances to get there.

44 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

Emma Stone’s Mia hates jazz, but beyond that she’s a vaguely drawn character in writer-director Damien Chazelle’s musical, La La Land.

As the town doctor, Damien’s mom (Sandrine Kiberlain) happens to treat Thomas’s mother on the very day that the two boys launch their yearlong fisticuffs campaign. (Sly Damien has been training with a family friend and he wins that round.) And so it transpires that Thomas is invited to live with his best enemy’s family while his mother battles through a dangerously tough pregnancy. If that screams “plot” a little too loudly, it also affords the chance to watch these two young actors simmer and swan around each other as Being 17 teases its way to a payoff made more profound by its uneasiness.

It’s the unimpeachable naturalism of Being 17 that eventually wins out, even against the hokey signalling of a second-act twist that otherwise broadens the film’s convincing emotional scope. That line between staginess and emotional truth is also pretty thin, it seems. > ADRIAN MACK

GHOSTLAND : THE VIEW OF THE JU/’HOANSI A documentary by Simon Stadler. In Ju/’hoan, German, and Italian, with English subtitles. Rating unavailable

“They’re nice, but so different!”

2 So says a Ju/’hoansi Bushman,

talking candidly about foreigners who come to experience a ritualized version of their daily lives. Eventually, a bunch of the locals leave Africa to gawk at Europeans in their own native habitats.

Over a breezy 85 minutes, Ghostland: The View of the Ju/’hoansi upends our notion of what “normal” might be.

To begin with, the Ju/’hoansi people of Namibia are already displaced at home, with their nomadic hunting practices banned by the government for more than a quarter-century now.

Consequently, they have turned themselves into cultural-tourism entrepreneurs making their old ways visible to safari-trekkers, some of whom show relatively sincere interest.

The favour, if that’s what it is, is returned by the villagers, partially through the ministrations of first-time docmaker Simon Stadler, who follows a group of particularly philosophical and linguistically adventurous villagers from outback Namibia to his native Germany and then on to Italy, where they become the curious travellers.

The interactions that follow, whether accidental or planned, hew to a rather repetitive structure, with the outgoing Chau and his more skeptical wife, Kxore—who speak an unusually percussive tongue—finding much fish-out-of-water humour among the inhabitants of the chilly, largely Caucasian places they call Ghostland.

It would be good if Stadler were able to delve deeper into their imperilled microculture. But this mutual introduction does offer an unusually positive window onto

human adaptability, suggesting what we still have to learn from each other—despite our most dedicated efforts not to.

> KEN EISNER

FENCES Starring Denzel Washington. Rated PG

Denzel Washington gives a performance in his third film as director, an adaptation of August Wilson’s Pulitzer Prize– winning play Fences. But sometimes a tower can just be a symbol of oppression and not much else.

First produced in 1987, and set in the early 1950s, Wilson’s work is part of a 10-play cycle about growing up black and poor in Pittsburgh. Washington was so transfixed by the role of Troy Maxson, an ex-ballplayer turned garbage collector with more pride than common sense, he took that part (originally played by James Earl Jones) in a Broadway revival in 2010. He and Viola Davis, as Maxson’s wife Rose, each earned a Tony for their efforts.

There’s no denying Washington’s easy mastery of Troy’s bitter patter, mostly about his own greatness and the disappointments of a segregated world. But what flows beautifully onstage feels bullying on-screen, where the face of the perpetually angry husband and father becomes 20 feet tall, grossly magnifying the small terrors felt daily by Rose (Davis, again) and student son Cory (England’s Jovan Adepo). The lad sees opportunities in sports denied 20 years earlier, but even Troy’s surprise promotion to truck driver—previously a whitesonly gig—can’t convince the older man that times really are a-changing.

This stern, if often smooth-talking, breadwinner replicates a cruel kind of social hierarchy at home, while finding his own freedom with something illicit on the side. He holds an older son (Russell Hornsby) in contempt for trying to escape through music, and saves most compassion for his own brother (Mykelti Williamson), mentally damaged by the Second World War. The totemically named Gabriel carries a battered trumpet and goes off on Bible-tinged rants that veer dangerously into Magical Negro territory.

As fluid as Wilson’s writing is, the work feels crucially dated—suggesting an Arthur Miller take on an all-black musical like Cabin in the Sky. Except for one Dinah Washington–fuelled montage for a needed breather, though, neither songs nor radical changes in location arrive to interrupt the ceaseless speechifying spread over almost two-and-a-half hours. Only Davis manages to keep her responses sounding fresh and free of stagecraft. But her character, much like the audience, simply ends up maxed out on Troy Maxson.

2 towering

> KEN EISNER see page 46

MUSIC

Christmas-loving members of Vancouver bands ACTORS, the Prettys, and Within Rust make like big kids at Jack Poole Plaza, ironically scaring all the actual children away. Amanda Siebert photo.

Local artists making merry

‘Fairytale of New York’ because I consciously heard it for the first time when I saw that Bill Murray Christmas special, and it really goes well with how I associate this time of year with drinking, broken dreams, and the approaching death of the elderly.” Best gift We got some of our favourite Vancouver musicians ever: “This one Christto tell us about their most beloved Christmas tunes mas when I was eight, I think, my parents got For all the unpleasant stuff that’s hap- my sister and I a CD each. For her, it was an pened this year—the deaths of David Bowie and Alice in Chains album and for me it was Rush Leonard Cohen, the election of Donald Trump, Chronicles. My parents decided right then and B Y M IK E U S IN G ER, and the continued existence of Ted Nugent, there that she would be groomed to grow up K AT E W IL S O N, A N D among them—it’s been a pretty great Decem- to be a sociable person who appreciated J O HN L U C A S ber so far. The local food co-op hasn’t run out of current pop culture and I would become a pedAvalon Dairy eggnog, Sufjan Stevens’s “Idumea antic nerd. Our guitarist Matt actually recently (Sacred Harp)” is getting at least six plays per day stole it from my room to put in his car and I’m on the iPod Classic, and we actually managed to pretty choked.” get through A Charlie Brown Christmas without doubling up on the Paxil. Part of the reason Whether she’s blasting out peppy garage pop we’re in a great mood is that the holiday season with Les Chaussettes or easing into smoother has seemed extra festive in Vancouver this year, retro R&B sounds as a solo artist, JOVANA which has everything to do with the snow that’s GOLUBOVIC has a knack for crafting timeless blanketed the ground since the beginning of De- hooks. Favourite Christmas song: “I sing in a cember. Because Christmas is all about sharing, classical church choir on Sunday mornings. All we asked some of our favourite local artists to of the music is technically Christmas songs! We share their warm and fuzzy memories from the forget that at one point in time almost all music most wonderful time of year. Merry Christmas. was about baby Jesus, except for folk music, And if there’s only one bottle of Avalon left on which was still about girls and poor life decisions. This opens up so many songs that perhaps the shelf at the co-op, please leave it for us. one hadn’t even considered as Christmas songs!

Within Rust hasn’t said outright that it’s on a So it’s fair to say that I like the old stuff for its quest to make emo cool again—and the band heightened sense of drama, since people feared classifies itself in the broader “alternative rock” God more or whatever. You know, ‘Lamb of God genre—but you can hear that unspoken mis- that taketh away the sins of the Earth—have sion in every earnestly wrought note frontman mercy on us!’ is so much more fun than ‘WalkNOLEN SCOTT sings. Catch Within Rust at ing in a winter wonderland’, especially when LanaLou’s on January 14. Favourite Christmas sung in Latin.” Best gift ever: “A couple years song: “My all-time favourite Christmas song is ago, my twin gave me a little black heart-shaped

stone that belonged to her and to our aunt before her. We had had matching ones, but I lost mine in a river. (How romantic!) But that was not the best gift. The best gift was what my father thought it was, considering my reaction of bawling my eyes out: a box of freshly cut onions!”

ACTORS frontman JASON CORBETT transports listeners back to the synth-fuelled days of the ’80s, sporting a sound that is, in the multi-instrumentalist’s words, both “aggressive and creamy”. Favourite Christmas song: “I’m more of a Halloween kinda guy, so it took me a minute to figure this one out. The one song that really stands out to me is the version of ‘Blue Christmas’ that Elvis performs during his 1968 comeback special. It just comes across so cool and easy. I went through a huge Elvis phase in my 20s. I think people forget how good he really was.” Best gift ever: “My dad bought me a Mickey Mouse drum kit when I was about six.

I woke up before everyone on Christmas Day and started smashing away at it, waking up the whole household. I wanted to start a band right there. After that morning, I was encouraged to play guitar instead.”

Layering guitar riffs, augmenting rhythms, and sporting uplifting saxophone lines, crunchy glam-punk band the Prettys have mastered the art of keeping rock ’n’ roll fresh. PIERCE KINGAN is on singing and bass-playing duties. Favourite Christmas song: “ ‘Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer’ was recorded in 1978 by Elmo & Patsy. I first heard it in ’98 or ’99 at my friend’s house. Our dads were drinking buddies, and they’re probably both drinking together in heaven right now. Anyhow, the song was fucking magical, and it blew my little mind. It’s cheeky and cheery, and best of all it’s a positive song about death.” Best gift ever: “Gooey Louie has to be my favourite present, because it was one of those Christmases where see page 47

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 45

Movie reviews

from page 44

SPIRIT UNFORGETTABLE A documentary by Pete McCormack.

Rating unavailable

Pain, pride, and pleasure interin Vancouver writerdirector Pete McCormack’s portrait of Spirit of the West frontman John Mann, seen coping with the early onset of Alzheimer’s disease and preparation for what will probably be the last tour with his fabled band.

McCormack has previously made tough-minded docs about Bruce Lee and Muhammad Ali, and the wellpaced Spirit Unforgettable (which aired once on HBO and won audience awards at VIFF and Hot Docs) shows the singer in very good company. Stalwart wife Jill Daum, herself a fine actress, plus bandmates and other long-time pals share their own perspectives on the sometimes agonizing, occasionally uplifting experience, as everyone heads for tour’s end, with the emblematic “Home for a Rest” extra meaningful in a massive sing-along at Massey Hall.

As in the Glen Campbell doc I’ll Be Me, the talking heads and musical interludes are interspersed with visits to medical specialists, and these are not at all uplifting. On another level, however, both films are excellent, and show how the presence of technology—specifically, iPads that contain all those lyrics that are so easy to forget—can help an artist hang on to his dwindling personhood. The fact that melody is the last thing to go shows how deeply music is embedded in the core of being human.

2 mingle

> KEN EISNER

PETER AND THE FARM A documentary by Tony Stone. Rating unavailable

How you gonna keep ’em down

2 on the farm, after they’ve seen

Paree? Well, it’s pretty easy when you’re talking about white-bearded Peter Dunning, a worldly, widely

read artist who tends his 187-acre Vermont spread almost alone.

Three wives and various children have come and gone over the four decades he’s been raising sheep, cows, and organic vegetables, while not really taking care of himself.

Sixty-eight at the time of being filmed by docmaker Tony Stone, Dunning is a misanthropic Kris Kringle, and there are few goodies in his bag; this Santa is missing parts of one of his claws, thanks to a sawmill accident early in life. His home looks bucolic but is loaded with the inherent violence of nature itself— when you have 187 acres filled with wild and domesticated animals, as well as plants and trees of all kinds, things are constantly dying and being killed or destroyed—and Peter admits that his (rarely seen) farmhand sometimes hides his hunting rifle “when I get suicidal”.

We don’t really know what triggered his apparent depression. Dunning’s an eloquent talker, with an oddly youthful-sounding voice and a strong poetic streak. But his energies are channelled in weird ways, like writing surly letters to a local newspaper and then getting miffed they’ve been edited. (When he reads one aloud, he seems almost angrier that the editing made sense.) Sometimes he seems to be directing the documentary he’s in, and at other moments, especially when drinking, he doesn’t really care. Oh, and he can sing every word of West Side Story.

This 90-minute visit is almost meditative in its alternation between wide, mostly wintry vistas and intense close-ups of animals, buildings, and hard-worn tools.

Peter’s no cheerful tour guide, but— and this feels like the film’s main point—he is an expert on mortality, especially his own.

“I don’t want to be scattered,” he recites at one point, ambiguously at first. “I’d rather be buried in the soil and maybe, for once, be at peace. I’ve spread and lost hope over every acre of this place. I’ve become the farm.” > KEN EISNER

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46 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

Making merry

from page 45

I got exactly what I wanted. I think I was about eight or nine. It’s the best version of Russian roulette out there for kids.”

Electronic-music upstart IAIN HOWIE has not only become a regular behind the decks at premier local events, the youngster’s R ad iohe ad-me e t s -hou s e -mu sic production is also turning heads at various record labels. Favourite Christmas song: “I tend to cringe at the thought of Christmas music—it’s all just a bit strange to me. That being said, digging back to find the likes of Nat King Cole and Sinatra is the way to go. Cole’s version of ‘The Christmas Song’ has that wonderful jazzy warmth that’s exactly what you need at this time of year. Apart from that, my family always liked to put on a CD from their sizable classical collection. Waking up and hearing the faint hum of strings from the living room signified that family time had begun.” Best gift ever: “I have a very fond memory of coming downstairs on Christmas Day and being sent to the basement to find a drum set in the corner of the room.

Sure, it was a rental, and it was lying in a heap on the floor, but it was totally unexpected and something that I’d wanted for a very long time—I was thrilled. Oh yes, and socks. You can never go wrong with socks.”

DEBRA-JEAN CREELMAN covers a lot of emotional ground on her dramatic new EP Railtown Sessions Volume 4, the former Mother Mother member sounding dangerously close to the edge on the distortionfrazzled “Maybe They Were Right” and joyfully in love with first-wave Motown on “Midnight Sun”. Favourite Christmas song: “I have left behind many of the traditions and trappings of Christmas that as a child I took as an absolute. But

the songs that were playing during what was a consistently harmonious and magical time in my young life will probably stay with me forever. Mahalia Jackson singing ‘O Holy Night’ is the embodiment of that feeling of nostalgia and comfort for me.” Best gift ever: “On my seventh Christmas, my sister and I were given a red and black ghetto blaster that came with a microphone that recorded to tape. I spent hours recording myself singing along to various records from my parents’ collection, which probably would have included some Kenny Rogers, Nana Mouskouri, and Neil Diamond, among others. This early delve into recording came to an untimely end a few months later, when the microphone was destroyed during a sibling-rivalryfuelled tug of war.”

Last holiday season, NARDWUAR THE HUMAN SERVIETTE was recovering from a stroke. Perhaps proving that there is a God, one of North America’s most legendary interviewers was back on his feet and going strong in 2016, even finding time to release a ripping new full-length, Ogopogo Punk, with his long-running garage band the Evaporators. Favourite Christmas song: “ ‘Power Pop Santa’ by the Pointed Sticks from Vancouver, B.C., Canada! Released in 2012 on La-Ti-Da Records. The Pointed Sticks formed in 1978 and along the way produced the catchiest tunes ever to come out of the Pacific Northwest. They even appeared in the movie Out of the Blue from 1980, with Dennis Hopper. ‘Power Pop Xmas Santa’ is no exception! It even shouts out Nikki Corvette and a Farfisa organ!” Best gift ever: “It will be a gift to myself this year! A book: I Survived D.O.A. by Randy Rampage, released in 2016 on GFY Press. I love anything punk-history-related and am really curious about Randy’s D.O.A. tales! Plus, Bev Davies does all the photos!

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t was one of the worst years in history, and not just because it ended with Kanye West, rap’s greatest antihero in intolerant New America, slobbering on the knob of Donald Trump.

About the only good thing that happened in 2016 was that Keith Richards didn’t die.

Then again, the more superstitious among us will note that even bringing this up is bad luck—kind of like talking about how a goalie is working on a shutout when there’s still three minutes left in a hockey game. And even though Richards has the genetic makeup of a New York City cockroach, they’ve got a point. There’s still just under two weeks left in 2016, and this is one year when you don’t want to tempt God (the real one, not Kanye The late Kurt Cobain longed for “a Leonard Cohen afterworld”, but Cohen West). Don’t forget that the man himself—who died in November—probably didn’t want a Cobain afterworld. upstairs took the seemingly indestructible Lemmy Kilmister just three arthritis. While Mojo Nixon probably anything to do with synth-laden funk. days before the sand ran out on 2015, wasn’t shedding any tears, everyone Sometimes, though—even if you have a so it’s not like He’s above making last- who ever sat in front of a Himalayan weak spot for “Raspberry Beret”—you minute decisions. pile of coke in the ’70s certainly was. find yourself alone on an island, and the In hindsight, the sudden death of If you’ve ever found yourself singing April 21 death of Prince was traumatizKilmister—the hard-drinking, Marl- “They stab it with their steely knives ing for many because of the way that it boro smoking, wart-festooned face of but they just can’t kill the beast,” you went down. No one wanted one of the Motörhead—was an early warning of have no right to deny his genius. most charismatic sex machines in the what was coming for 2016. The bad April took two outlaws—Prince history of pop music to die at home news this year started just 10 days in, and Merle Haggard—from radically alone in his mansion’s elevator. As an when David Bowdifferent playing unrepentant pervert, Prince, who was ie joined Major fields. The bril- 57, deserved to go out in bed in the midTom somewhere liance of iconic dle of a massive sex session, not as yet in the vast great renegade Hag- another fentanyl victim.

Mike Usinger blackness beyond gard was the way Speaking of sex machines, thumbs Earth. What shocked us the most that he pissed off all factions of coun- up to Leonard Cohen for making was that we had no heads-up that it try music. Pinkos, commies, and it to age 82 with more class than was going to happen. The Thin White war protesters couldn’t figure out if any of us will ever have. Actually, Duke had been diagnosed with liver Hag was taking dead aim at them in pervert is too harsh a word—it’s cancer 18 months previously but “Okie From Muskogee”. Intolerant more that the guy was a Lothario chose to keep the news to himself and rednecks, meanwhile, found them- who had game right up to the end. those closest to him. One day he was selves asking which team Haggard True story: a friend met Cohen at a here, getting ready to spring his final was really playing for every time he MuchMusic party when she was in triumph, Blackstar, upon us. The next issued a statement like his Barack her 20s and the Canadian icon was he was strutting around in heaven in Obama–inspired “It’s really almost in his 50s. She asked for an autoglitter-spackled platforms, a light- criminal what they do with our graph, and got a piece of paper back ning bolt proudly painted on his face. president. They call him all kinds of asking her if she’d be interested in If his death hurt more than most names all day long, saying he’s doing retiring to his room. celebrity passings, it’s because Bowie certain things that he’s not.” In the When the Earth finally implodes was somehow something bigger than end Haggard spoke for all of us who there’s only one song that’s truly fit a rock star whose star burned brightly are struggling to get by in a world to usher us all to a better place, and over an incredible six decades. The where the rich continue to get richer, that’s “Hallelujah”. And hopefully, man born David Robert Jones was a and the poor end up fleeing Vancou- that place will look a lot like what revolutionary in the purest sense of the ver. If you’re among those wondering Kurt Cobain was hoping for in his term, changing the world’s attitudes where the money is going to come epically sad “Pennyroyal Tea”, when toward sexuality, art, fashion, and the from once the Christmas credit-card he sang “Give me a Leonard Cohen right to wear clown suits while walk- bills arrive, one spin of Hag’s “If We afterworld/So I can sigh eternally.” ing up the beach in front of a bulldoz- Make It Through December” will There will be no shortage of 2016 er. Cue up the official video for “Ashes speak to you in ways Garth Brooks arrivals there, some of them legends, to Ashes” on YouTube for a potent re- can only dream of. many of them beloved, including minder of why he’ll be epically missed.

At the risk of enraging @fuckcle- R&B soul queen Sharon Jones, alBowie’s death was just a taste of vernames on Twitter, I never got ternative pioneer Alan Vega, and ska the horrors to come. Eight days later, Prince and never will. That might giant Prince Buster. In the meanthe Eagles’ Glenn Frey discovered have everything to do with an aver- time, please spend the next 12 days he wasn’t in it for the long run af- sion to synchronized dancing in ’80s or so praying that Keith Richards ter all, dying from a combination of music videos, an inability to appreciate doesn’t become a late addition to this pneumonia, ulcerative colitis, and Jimi Hendrix, and a general dislike of year’s saddest of parties. -

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48 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 49

MUSIC

Vancouver’s Funk Hunters love a live vibe Conventional wisdom tells us

it returns to Vancouver for its festive hometown show.

“Both the Christmas concerts we did last year were such a success that we thought that we wanted to keep it going, and make it bigger. It’s a great time of year to return to the city—we haven’t played a show here in a year—so we’re super stoked for it. Our best performances are always in Vancouver.”

2 that it’s best not to meet your

idols. Not only are they likely to be infinitely less cool in the flesh, chances are you’ll make a faux pas so embarrassing that you’ll inwardly cringe every time your mind flits back to the occasion.

Not ones to follow traditional guidelines, however, Vancouver electronic dance duo the Funk Hunters chose to disregard that advice. On the cusp of completing a new song in Germany in late 2014, Duncan Smith and Nick Middleton had a discussion about who they most wanted to rap over the track. After their childhood hero Chali 2na topped both of their wish lists, the pair got in touch with the Jurassic 5 star’s management. To their surprise, 2na was in.

“Chali’s collaborated with more artists than I’ve ever seen before,” Smith tells the Straight on the line from the ferry to Vancouver Island. “When we approached him to make that first track, he was already looking to do something a bit more on the electronic side, so obviously we were stoked for that. When we went out on the road with him for the very first tour, we were more than a little nervous. But Chali’s a very humble and genuine guy, so we became close quickly. We’ve developed a professional friendship, I’d call it.”

Like all good creative partnerships, that association has continued beyond the Funk Hunters’ time on the road. After touching down in Vancouver, Smith and Middleton headed back into the studio to work on new material and craft their latest EP, ILLectric. Characteristically fusing a number of different genres, the five-track collection encompasses everything from the soft trap rhythms of “Oh Shit” to the highly danceable drum ’n’ bass beat on the album’s final track, “Right Right Up”.

The project impressed 2na so much that he chose to lend his rich baritone

> KATE WILSON

The Funk Hunters play the Commodore Ballroom on Wednesday and Thursday (December 21 and 22).

Cross-genre experiments are what gets Getter going It’s wise to take most things you

2 read on social media with a grain

The Funk Hunters are so determined to keep things chill that they built their studio inside the world’s largest refrigerator.

raps to the entire EP—and agreed to join the duo on tour once again.

“Our process since day one has been setting the Funk Hunters apart, and trying to figure out ways in which we can be more unique,” Smith says.

“That’s especially true of our shows.

I think having live musicians alongside us DJing just adds so much. You can only watch someone standing behind a laptop so many times, so it’s

important to have a range of instruments and vocalists performing up there with us. We have guitars, saxophonists, trumpets, percussion, and MCs, and those configurations are constantly changing for each concert. It adds a lot more feeling to the show and performance—and having Chali definitely adds to that vibe.

“That being said,” he continues, “we’re definitely the ones curating the

shows this time around. Unlike some of the tours that we’ve done with Chali in the past where it’s been more of a split or hybrid concert, this is definitely our show, where we’re getting him up there to perform some of the new material we’ve done together.”

Heading out on a six-date road trip themed as Funk the Halls, the duo is excited to pack the stage with as many musicians as possible when

of salt. With that in mind, when the Straight reaches Tanner Petulla at home in Los Angeles, a little clarification is in order. On December 14, Petulla, known for the bass-bombed EDM tracks he produces under the name Getter, announced on Facebook that among his planned projects for 2017 are a pair of releases exploring very different genres: rap and heavy metal.

It turns out he wasn’t kidding. “I’m about six tracks deep right now on the hip-hop one,” Petulla reveals. “It’s just me rapping with my friends over my beats. And I’ve been writing metal for a couple of years, but I found recently that you can do it all by yourself with MIDI instruments, so I’m basically producing the drums and the guitar, and then I’m doing vocals over it. By the time everything’s ready there’s going to be two EDM EPs, and then a metal album and a rap album.

So there’ll be, like, 30 tracks.”

Petulla clearly has no interest in being classified as a single-genre artist. Even though most of his output falls under the EDM umbrella see next page

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50 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

generally and that of bass music more specifically, it isn’t always easy to categorize. Getter’s two most recent releases for Skrillex’s OWSLA label—the EPs Radical Dude! and Wat the Frick—showcase the work of a man who gleefully blurs the lines between robot-rumble dubstep, woofer-blasting trap, and bombsquad hip-hop. You can call Getter’s music whatever you like, or you can follow the producer’s lead and refuse to call it anything.

“I just describe it as music,” Petulla says. “I feel like people are too scared to do what they want, because they don’t want to upset their brand or some shit.

But at the end of the day, with where music is now, the music is maybe 20 percent of what actually matters now.

And it sucks, but I feel like you need to make that 20 percent count as much as you can, because it’s the only real thing musicians do nowadays.”

Given his determination to keep pushing boundaries, it’s not surprising that Petulla prefers to present forwardlooking sets when he plays out. He says that he will still spin the classics that fans want to hear (and “classic” is a relative concept when you consider Getter has only been releasing music since 2011), but Petulla is notoriously dismissive of his older material.

“I mean, I’m proud of it, but I don’t really like it,” he admits. “So I just want to make everybody stoked on my new stuff rather than just chilling in the past.”

Here’s hoping Getter’s fans are stoked on hearing his take on headbangers-ball rock. > JOHN LUCAS

Getter plays BC Place as part of the Contact Winter Music Festival, taking place Monday and Tuesday (December 26 and 27).

The songs still energize Loverboy’s rock veterans Whenever Mike Reno feels the

2 pressure of being a 61-year-old

delivering songs that he wrote in his 20s, he has only to think back to a magic decade: the 1980s.

Life is good for the Loverboy frontman these days, and the topic of retirement never raises its ugly head during his telephone chat with the Straight.

“We haven’t had an empty seat in the last three years—and it’s getting crazier,” Reno reports from his Crescent Beach home. “Before 2017 has even gotten here we’ve got 37 shows on the books; we’re trying to keep it down, but the shows keep coming in. We even raised our prices, and people still keep calling, trying to book us. We’re actually completely flabbergasted by it.…and it’s given us a sense of purpose as we get older.”

This sense of purpose, he adds, derives from Loverboy’s debt to hit songs such as “Working for the Weekend” and “Turn Me Loose”.

“I’ll tell you something,” he confides. “Over the years, we’ve realized that we’re like the torch-runners; we carry the torch for these songs.

These songs have taken on a life of their own. They’re bigger than we are. Individually, together, whatever: they’re just bigger. People all over the world have grown up to these songs.

We’ve got gold singles in Australia, you know what I mean? This torch is burning, so we just have to be good.

We have to represent.”

That’s not always easy, however, but Reno admits that he’s not a disciple of the Mick Jagger school of calisthenics. Instead, memory serves to give him a lift when he needs one.

“The other night we did a show down in Lake Charles, Louisiana, at this big, huge Golden Nugget casino,” he recalls. “There were 3,400 people dancing, going crazy, and after about eight songs I started going ‘Oh my god, I’ve got another five songs to go,’ and I was trying to figure out how I was going to get ’er done. And then I just closed my eyes and fell back into, like, playing in front of 100,000 people at JFK Stadium. I just kind of make myself do it; I take myself to a place that energizes my spirit, and then I just go for it. It’s really going for it, that’s what it is. That’s what the

The man who sang “The Kid Is Hot Tonite” isn’t a kid himself anymore, but Loverboy’s Mike Reno (centre) still rocks a heaband like nobody else can.

young kids love: we’re a bunch of old farts going for it!”

Increasingly, he adds, the kids are showing up, some dressed in retro headbands and vintage T-shirts they’ve scored on the Internet. And the band helps keep itself young by continually writing and releasing new material on its website. But peer validation is also important, and Reno takes particular pleasure in detailing what will be Loverboy’s first gig of 2017, following its New Year’s Eve appearance at the Hard Rock Casino Vancouver.

“Sammy Hagar asked us to come down and play his wife’s 50th-birthday party,” he reports. “He said ‘Pick your favourite band, and I’ll bring them down to Cabo Wabo to celebrate,’ and she picked Loverboy! So he said ‘Come on down for a week.

We’ll do the show, and then you can just hang out and have fun.’ ” Good times are assured, even if Reno allows that he’s going to go easy on the Chickenfoot singer’s favourite tipple.

“I had Sammy teach me how to drink tequila once—and I was throwing up beside the tour bus while he was laughing at me,” he confesses, with a laugh of his own. “I think his was water, and mine was tequila!”

Not every memory is good, then— but such is the rock star life.

be happy to go out and do at any hour of the night, because those guys were playing instrumental soul music at a very high level all the time. It kept me doing that kind of playing, which I’d

already dabbled in with the Lounge Lizards and Slow Poke and other different projects.”

To the core rhythm section of bassist Tim Lüntzel, drummer Tony Mason, and pianist Erik Deutsch, Blake added percussionist Moses Patrou, in a nod to the Latin-soul sounds of the ’60s, along with guitarists Avi Bortnick, from jazz legend John Scofield’s band, and Tony Scherr, better known for his work as a bassist with Bill Frisell and Norah Jones. The new unit quickly picked up some highprofile fans—and free time in one of New York’s busiest studios.

“The band played great live. We just had a ball,” Blake says. “And then Andy Taub, who runs Brooklyn Recording Studio, came to hear us and said, ‘Hey, why don’t you record this?’ I was like, ‘Oh, I don’t have the budget, and I don’t know what record company to deal with…’ and he just went, ‘Who cares? Just come in and record.’ And the band felt the same way, so everybody just set aside two days, and we got it done.”

Blake originally intended to spend another couple of days adding extra horns or perhaps even a singer, but was soon convinced to leave well enough alone. “Tony [Scherr] mentioned that this music is really about ensemble playing, with everyone sounding good together playing in a room,” he says. “So I decided to just mix the tracks as we did them and live with it, warts and all.”

This, Blake adds, is in keeping with Duke Ellington’s conception of jazz as “social music”: functional art that is both sonically seductive and creatively challenging. “I wanted it to be about grooves and dance pieces, and eventually play in places where people would be dancing to what we’re doing,” he says. “And we’re getting there, slowly but surely.” > ALEXANDER VARTY

Michael Blake’s Holiday Soul Party, with organist Chris Gestrin, drummer Joe Poole, and percussionist Jack Duncan, is at Frankie’s Jazz Club next Thursday (December 29).

> ALEXANDER VARTY

Loverboy plays the Hard Rock Casino Vancouver on New Year’s Eve (December 31).

Blake’s latest has good beat and you can dance to it There’s usually some kind of

2 thesis to each of Michael Blake’s

albums, whether they’re about integrating Vietnamese music with jazz (Kingdom of Champa), paying tribute to his saxophone heroes Coleman Hawkins and Lester Young (Tiddy Boom), or mixing European and North American approaches to improvisation (Blake Tartare). So it’s not strange that the essence of the Montreal-born, Vancouver-raised saxophonist’s new Red Hook Soul can be reduced to a single sentence—although the sentence in question isn’t one that’s often applied to jazz albums.

“It’s got a great beat, and you can dance to it” is Blake’s motto on the new disc, and he meets his goal handily.

As its title suggests, Red Hook Soul is a tribute to African-American pop music of the 1960s, a point driven home by the record’s Otis Redding, Gladys Knight, and Ray Charles covers. (Also reworked are Lana Del Rey’s “Video Games” and jazz innovator Rahsaan Roland Kirk’s “Volunteered Slavery”, just to mix things up a bit.) But it’s also a homage to Brooklyn’s Red Hook neighbourhood, where Blake picks up pocket change playing soul whenever he’s not on the road with his own projects, and where he met most of the other players on the new disc.

“The band got together in Red Hook at this speakeasy—actually, a pretty legitimate bar called Sunny’s,” he recalls. “The drummer and the bass player had been playing in a bar band together for at least a decade, and I’d been subbing in that band for years. It was something I’d

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MUSIC

Nardwuar flexes his skills on Ogopogo Punk LOCAL D I S C S THE EVAPORATORS Ogopogo Punk (Nardwuar/Mint)

Though rarely seen, the titular from the Evaporators’ new Ogopogo Punk LP is one of B.C.’s most high-profile living legends. Then again, so is Nardwuar. But unlike the scaly, Okanagan Lake–scouring creature, the Human Serviette is more than comfortable with being in the public eye. Though many recognize the tam-and-tartan-covered journo for leading interviews in which he bestows bouquets of rare records and other assorted ephemera upon hiphop figures, Evaporators records let him flex another set of mike skills.

Being famously hirsute, the Nard tells barbers to put away the blade on opening number “I Can’t Be Shaved!”, a reasonably raucous garage-rawk rave-up that also brandishes a wild solo by stringman Stephen Hamm.

Hair also figures big on “Mohawks & Dreadlocks”, a track about scene unity and getting your knots tangled in someone’s piercing in a mosh pit.

The title track, meanwhile, includes Nardwuar’s helium-voiced assurance that Ogopogo likes to keep itself under the radar in the name of DIY. But like the chicken salad on white bread the vocalist praises on “Eat to Win”, the Evaporators are a bit of an acquired taste. To say the least, the quintet’s latest blast pushes pop-rock optimism and hokey-jokey couplets to the point of exhaustion. Though seasoned with savoury sax sounds, the chorus of “Tulips and turkey/Oysters, beef jerky” on “Chuckanut” is a facsimile of “Gimme some ointment/I need an appointment” from the 20-year-old anthem “I Gotta Rash”.

Indie rapper Brother Ali steers the album into unknown territory with a golden-soul-sampling finale about “chilling with motherfuckin’

2 figure

The Evaporators decided to wear matching outfits after their attempts at making low-budget Village People–esque costumes went disastrously awry.

Nardwuar”. Like each interview the Nard’s done over the years, the song ends with the familiar refrain of “Doot doola doot doo.” It turns out Ogopogo Punk snuck in a shave and a haircut after all. > GREGORY ADAMS

JAPANDROIDS Near to the Wild Heart of Life (Arts & Crafts/Anti-)

Time and space are generally in flux for the guys in Japandroids, who have logged hundreds of shows around the world on multiple marathon tours. It’s therefore no surprise that concepts of home crop up on the duo’s new Near to the Wild Heart of Life full-length, their third album and first in nearly five years. Despite wrapping the massive campaign behind sophomore set Celebration Rock in 2013, guitarist Brian King and drummer Dave Prowse have been

2

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travelling nonstop, working on their latest eight songs in New Orleans, King’s now part-time home bases of Toronto and Mexico City, and good old Vancouver. As such, the opening title track weighs in on the “continuous cold war between my home and my hometown”. Contemplating his displacement atop open chords and hammer-down beats, King pushes aside fever dreams of the past with the feeling of community he gets at his new local bar.

While receptive to change, Japandroids haven’t completely remodelled themselves for this latest release; the duo still deliver plenty of familiarly distorted guitar hooks and drum damage. That said, tracks like “North East South West” and the Prowsesung standout “Midnight to Morning” thrive on a heartland-rock vibe far less scrappy than the East Van–made rockers’ early catalogue, and the band also ushers in mature-album musts like ambient washes of sound and a good deal of acoustic strumming.

The epic, seven-and-a-half-minute “Arc of Bar” shakes things up the most with a digitally manipulated guitar loop, an icily straight-up backbeat, and King’s long-form treatise on familiarizing himself with a new hometown’s bar scene full of bloodsucking parasites, “hustlers and whores”. Japandroids has already booked a ton of dates for 2017; only time will tell how long it’ll be before he gets back to the chaos at his local.

full-length, Continent & Western. The Vancouver-based avant-rock septet was already splintering at the time: a couple guys moved to Toronto; Drip Audio boss/violinist Jesse Zubot and trumpeter JP Carter toured extensively with the likes of Tanya Tagaq, Destroyer, and Dan Mangan; and bandleaderguitarist Stephen Lyons needed time to rewire his creativity. They didn’t even play together, on-stage or in rehearsal, for two solid years.

Rather than forcing it, the Fond of Tigers collective let inspiration come at their own pace, and there is a sense of that composure in the sound of Uninhabit. While their first three albums contained progressively less improvisation, Uninhabit was thoroughly composed and structured. Vocals take a notable role in the mix, with Lyons sounding wonderfully like Leonard Cohen on “Wonder What We’re Whispering For”. There is an ease in the organization of these five sprawling epics, contrasting the dynamic ferociousness of the band members’ performance. They cover new ground but feel natural doing so. Clearly, what happened before needed to happen. > ALAN RANTA

MI’ENS Challenger (Kingfisher Bluez)

Mi’ens’s Challenger was tech-

2 nically released in the summer

of 2016, but it wasn’t pressed onto its glorious coloured 10-inch vinyl format until the winter, and its official release show remains planned for January 28, 2017. As it happens, January 28 is the anniversary of the Challenger space shuttle disaster, whence the album’s title was drawn.

A stylized rendition of the craft’s plume disintegrating over the Atlantic Ocean graces the mini-album’s cover, providing an implied context with which one may approach this album, a dearth of intelligence that results in chaos as humanity’s progress is tempered by hubris.

The Vancouver-based duo of drummer Evan and guitarist-looperfrontwoman Kim (last names withheld by request) are experts in a quite specific yet hard-to-pin-down style of artsy, noisy math-rock, perhaps best summarized by the title of their 2014 debut, experimentalsparklenoisepop.

Their prowess is even more clearly defined on Challenger, bursting with technical instrumental jams for those who gravitate to the warmer side of > GREGORY ADAMS Battles, Don Caballero, and Trans Am. Evan propels the polyrhythmic DEBRA-JEEN CREELMAN momentum, while Kim’s shredding breaks the sound barrier, the two Railtown Sessions Volume 4 delivering a sonic assault and always (Light Organ) pushing forward with a spring in Change is important, and that’s their step. You won’t mind Momma something Debra-Jean Creel- pinning these Mi’ens to your ears. > ALAN RANTA man seems to have seized upon with her Railtown Sessions Volume 4. The one-time Mother Mother member’s SPRUCE TRAP older work with her backing band the The Wise Prefer to Perish (Big Means suggested a deep love for what Smoke Records) might best be described as soul-train It’s a challenge not to bring up country. Railtown Sessions Volume 4 Godspeed You! Black Emperor has her branching out in gritty new directions, while once again proving when describing The Wise Prefer to she’s got one of the most powerful—al- Perish, the first proper full-length beit undiscovered—voices in the city. from the Vancouver postrock trio The four-song EP gets off to a fan- of guitarist Isaac Jeffs, percussionist tastically abrasive start with “Maybe Kai Furugori, and guitarist-bassist They Were Right”, which gives you a Eric Furugori under the name of good idea of what Neil Young’s Crazy Spruce Trap. When you hear their Horse might sound like if it sat in textural, atmospheric, guitar-laden with Portishead. “Midnight Sun” instrumentals slowly begin to unfurl serves up the Muscle Shoals sound into grandiose postrock crescendos, while adding a coat of DIY grit, and while contemplating the political “Up in Smoke” is ethereal jazz geared gravity of the album’s title and tag to the 2 a.m. crowd at Twin Peaks’ line (“a brief story of the inevitable Black Lodge. And just when you fall”), GY!BE is the most obvious think Creelman can’t get any better, reference point. For many bands of she does her best to out-torch Lana this ilk, such a comparison would be Del Rey on the closing “In the Dark”. a bit of a reach, but Spruce Trap has > MIKE USINGER proven itself worthy on this record.

An important distinction: while FOND OF TIGERS GY!BE champions the Montreal scene, Spruce Trap is imbued with Uninhabit (Drip Audio) the spirit of the West Coast. Isaac It’s been a long, strange trip for Jeffs and Kai Furugori frequent the Fond of Tigers since it won the trails on Vancouver’s North Shore, Juno Award for instrumental album which feeds into the atmospheric of the year in 2011 with its third ambiance of recordings such as

2

2

Happy Holidays!

52 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

2

“Fiddle Nero/Rome Is Burning”, with its sample discussing the ominous inevitability of the Kinder Morgan pipeline. If GY!BE was the call, Spruce Trap is an apt response.

> ALAN RANTA

STRANGE THINGS Higher Anxiety (La Ti Da)

It must’ve been a weird year for foursome Strange Things. Just a couple of months ago, the band’s name wouldn’t have caused much of a stir, but it’s almost impossible to look at those two words now and not think about Netflix’s supernatural summer smash, Stranger Things. It may well be a blessing in disguise, with an innocent typo on Google potentially leading someone scanning for Upside Down conspiracy theories late at night to find out something about the Lower Mainland’s garage-rock scene.

While the score to the ’80s-set horror drama specializes in haunting synth minimalism, Strange Things’ two-song single for La Ti Da Records hypnotizes with the sounds of ’60s psych. The title of A-side “Higher Anxiety” is a bit of a misnomer, as the track is a relaxing, blue-pill haze of reverberated guitar hooks and “Tomorrow Never Knows” beat work. Even though the back end wriggles through a series of distorted, backwards guitar licks, the sonics will spike your serotonin levels.

The similarly plotted-out “Gather Believers” leaves something to be desired, though. While, on the surface, the B-side also has a love for lock-groove psychedelia and wallto-wall vocal harmonies, it lacks the effervescent drive of the earlier track.

It’s almost as if things are darker on the Upside Down of the vinyl single.

Strange Things, indeed.

2 Vancouver

> GREGORY ADAMS

THE FLYPAPER ORCHESTRA Boulevard of Broken Dreams (Flypaper)

If you’ve got an ounce of nostal-

2 gia in your soul, run right out

and buy yourself this for Christmas.

Long-time Georgia Straight contributor and under-the-radar guitarist Ken Eisner has assembled an astonishing cast of musicians both famous and unknown, local and international, on Boulevard of Broken Dreams, which he’s all-too-presciently subtitled Old Songs for a New Depression. He’s also pushed them into some surprising partnerships: Salt Spring Island slide wizard Harry Manx with gospel group the Sojourners makes sense, but mustachioed theremin explorer Stephen Hamm with former Miles Davis guitarist Robben Ford and local blues god Jim Byrnes? On the appropriately eerie “Fear Itself”, that makes sense too.

Eisner also dispels the notion that music critics can’t play through his sparkling, intimate guitar duets with fret kings Michael Friedman and Paul Pigat, in the process setting the bar regrettably high for any other inkstained pickers in this town who might be considering their own recording.

Damn him! But I digress. The bandleader does a fabulous job of updating classics like the title tune and Woody Guthrie’s “I Ain’t Got No Home in This World Anymore”, nudging them towards Tom Waits terrain in part through the state-ofthe-art stickwork of drummers Dan Parry and Geoff Hicks. Bassist Rene Worst, violinist Jesse Zubot, and keyboardist Simon Kendall also make memorable contributions, alongside an A-list cast of singers, including Ron Sexsmith, Colleen Rennison, and Luke Doucet.

The downside of all this, I suppose, is that if you’re not of a nostalgic bent Boulevard of Broken Dreams might seem impressive, but slightly less than necessary. Eisner needn’t worry, however: four years from now we’re all going to be nostalgic for now. > ALEXANDER VARTY

music/ timeout CONCERTS < CLUBS & VENUES < OUT OF TOWN <

CONCERTS 2JUST ANNOUNCED HOLY FUCK Toronto-based electronica collective tours in support of its latest release Congrats. Jan 19, doors 8 pm, show 9 pm, Fortune Sound Club (147 E. Pender). Tix $20 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ticketweb.ca/.

WILLIAM SINGE Australian pop-R&B singer-songwriter and producer performs on his Changes Tour, with guest Alex Aiono. Feb 22, doors 7 pm, show 8 pm, Vogue Theatre (918 Granville). Tix $30 (plus service charges and fees) at www.livenation.com/.

PIGS Canadian Pink Floyd tribute band.

Feb 24, doors 6:30 pm, show 7:30 pm, The ACT Arts Centre (11944 Haney Pl., Maple Ridge). Tix $35.50 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ghostfingerproductions.com/.

LYLE LOVETT AND JOHN HIATT Texasbased Americana singer-songwriter coheadlines with American folk-rock vocalist-guitarist. Mar 6, doors 6:30 pm, show 7:30 pm, Queen Elizabeth Theatre (650 Hamilton). Tix $103.95/72.45/61.95/ 40.05 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ticketmaster.ca/.

ARLO GUTHRIE American folk singer-songwriter (“Alice’s Restaurant Massacree”, “City of New Orleans”) performs on his Running Down the Road Tour.

Apr 30, doors 6:30 pm, show 7:30 pm, Kay Meek Centre (1700 Mathers Ave., West Van). Tix $95.50 (plus service charges and fees) at www.kaymeekcentre.com/.

2THIS WEEK DONNY & MARIE Sibling pop singers and TV stars Donny and Marie Osmond perform three shows, mixing holiday songs with a nostalgic look back at their careers in show biz. Dec 20-22, doors 7 pm, show 8 pm, River Rock Show Theatre (River Rock Casino Resort, 8811 River Rd.). Tix $149.50 (plus service charges and fees) at www. ticketmaster.ca/, info www.riverrock.com.

FUNK THE HALLS Local DJ duo the Funk Hunters, composed of Nick Middleton and Duncan Smith, headline a holiday celebration. Dec 21-22, doors 8 pm, show 9:30 pm, Commodore Ballroom (868 Granville). Tix $30 (plus service charges and fees) at www.livenation.com/.

KEN LAVIGNE’S CHRISTMAS MUSICAL ROADSHOW Ken Lavigne takes a look back to the golden age of radio shows with performances by his band and guests Alison MacDonald and Daniel James White. Dec 21, 7:30-10 pm, Centennial Theatre (2300 Lonsdale Ave., North Van).

Tix $38/18, info www.kenlavigne.com/.

FEAR OF NOISE Local jazz-punk band per- Hoo Simpsons Trivia every 3rd Mon., forms at a release party for album Hierarchy, TING! w/ Tank Gyal & guests Thu; Waldorf A Go-Go with Vinyl Ritchie Fri; Vision with guests Criminal Slipper, Villain Villain, Saturdays.

Stolen Faces, and Broken Sleep. Dec 30-31, 9 pm–3 am, Media Club (695 Cambie). Tix BACKSTAGE LOUNGE Arts Club Theatre, $10, info www.fearofnoise.ca/.

1585 Johnston, Granville Island, 604-687-1354.

Vancouver’s only live-music venue on the 2NEW YEAR’S EVE water, with music nightly. Hot Jazz Jam night NEW YEAR’S AT THE HOTEL on Tue. 2NYE PARTY, HART & SOUL Dec 31 VANCOUVER Ring in the new year BILTMORE CABARET 2755 Prince with an all-night dance party featuring Edward, 604-676-0541. Resident DJs performances by Hedspin, Ricco, Koosh, Erica Dee, Hubbz, Jon Lee, Tainted Lovers, My!Gay!Husband!, Sincerely Hanna, and Rico Uno Sat; burlesque with Burgundy Mr. Pablo, Matt Hudolin, Derrick Vnuk, Brixx & the Purrrfessor Sun; tropical, electro, Wmnstudies, Zeeaa, Florist, Christian Flores, Luciterra, and the Orchid Club. Dec goth, world, and rudeboy with DJs Peter & Robbie (Humans), DJ Bee, Wobangs, 31, Hotel Vancouver (900 W. Georgia). Tix and Basedgoth Tue. 2JOHN PAUL WHITE $99-245 (plus service charges and fees) at Jan 16 2KITTY NIGHTS BURLESQUE: 9TH www.hotelvancouvernye.com/.

ANNIVERSARY SHOW Jan 29 2LYDIA TRUE NORTH New Year’s Eve concert LOVELESS Feb 2 2KOBO TOWN Feb 4 features performances by the Sheepdogs, 2KATE BUSH: LIVE BAND BURLESQUE Yukon Blonde, Humans (Live), Delhi 2 TRIBUTE Feb 12 2LEON Feb 14 2CLOUD Dublin, Meghan Patrick, and DJs Andy NOTHINGS Feb 16 2CLIPPING. Feb 22 Clockwork, Kevin Shiu, and Hebegebe.

2KEVIN ABSTRACT Feb 26 2THE RADIO Dec 31, 8 pm, Vancouver Convention DEPT. Feb 28 2TENNIS Mar 1 2SPRING Centre (1055 Canada Place). Tix from BURLESQUE SHOWCASE Mar 12 2JOSEPH $99 (plus service charges and fees) at Mar 18 2JAIN Mar 27 2COLONY HOUSE www.nyevan.com/truenorth.

Apr 1 2THE WEDDING PRESENT Apr 26 2SONDRE LERCHE Apr 28 NEW YEAR’S EVE 2017 GLITZ AND BIMINI PUBLIC HOUSE 2010 W. 4th, 604GLAMOUR GALA Ring in the new year 733-7116. Twenty-four taps of rotating and with music by DJs Alibaba, Earl da Pearl, interesting craft beers. Pub trivia Mon; Daddy Mikey, El-Nino, Kemo, Rexx, beer club Tue; Wing Wed; dance party Redemption Sound, and Chile Palmer, as Fri-Sat; happy hour 3-6 pm. well as saxophonist Paul Choisil and Jany and Jorge. Dinner optional. Formal dress BLACKBIRD PUBLIC HOUSE & OYSTER required. Dec 31, doors 6 pm, dinner 7 BAR 905 Dunsmuir, 604-899-4456. Bistro pm, dance 9:30 pm, Hilton Vancouver and public house with oyster bar, barberMetrotown (6083 McKay Ave., Burnaby). shop, Scotch bar, and live music Wed-Fri. Tix $99/60 (plus service charges and fees) Open daily at 11 am. Happy hour 3-6 pm. at www.ticketmaster.ca/.

BLACK WIZARD AND BLACK BREATH Vancouver heavy-metal band coheadlines with Washington death-metal group in a New Year’s Eve show. Dec 31, 7 pm, Rickshaw Theatre (254 E. Hastings).

Tix $18.50, info www.facebook.com/ events/303114886727833/.

LOVERBOY Canadian rock group (“Turn Me Loose”, “Working for the Weekend”) performs at a New Year’s Eve party.

Dec 31, 8 pm, Molson Canadian Theatre at Hard Rock (2080 United Blvd.). Tix at www.ticketmaster.ca/.

don’t miss out!

For up-to-the-minute, searchable Music Time Out listings, visit

www.straight.com

NYE ’17 CARNIVALE VANCOUVER New Year’s Eve party features DJs from Mexico, Spain, and South America. Dec 31–Jan 1, 7 pm–3 am, Lux Lounge (1180 Howe). Tix $55/35, info www.vancouverlatinfever.com/.

NYE AT TEN TEN Gabriel Hasselbach hosts a New Year’s Eve party featuring music by Lisa Dunn, Alita Dupray, and Ralph Barrat. Dec 31, 5:30 pm–3 am, Ten Ten Tapas (1010 Beach). Tix $110.10/75.10, info www.tententapas.com/events/.

BONNIE SCOTT AC/DC TRIBUTE NYE PARTY Celebrate New Year’s Eve with music by AC/DC tribute band Bonnie Scott and Ween tribute band Japanese Cowboy, and guests Sabotage. Dec 31, 8 pm, Pat’s Pub & Brewhouse (403 E. Hastings). Tix $15/12, info www.imuproductions.com/.

THE WHISKEYDICKS Canadian Celtic-punk rockers. Dec 31, 8 pm, Dubh Linn Gate (1601 Main). Info vancouver.dubhlinngate.com/ events-and-music/upcoming-events.php.

NEW YEAR’S EVE AT THE EATERY Highlights include nibbles, party favours, CHRISTMAS BELLES Celebrate the season with jazz vocalists Ashleigh Somerville, a midnight toast, and music by Zaac Pick. Dec 31–Jan 1, 8 pm–1 am, Trading Mandy Rushton, and Karin Plato. Dec Post Brewing Taphouse and Eatery .

23, 8-11 pm, Cottage Bistro (4470 Main).

Tix $30, info www.facebook.com/ Tix $15 at the door, cash only, info www. events/726628050822570/. smashlee.com/.

CONTACT WINTER MUSIC FESTIVAL Electronic-music festival features performances by Flume, Zeds Dead, Gareth Emery, Getter, Mija, Drezo, Audien, Big Wild, Shaun Frank, Sleepy Tom, Disclosure DJ, Marshmello, W&W, Slushii, Vicetone, Botnek, Baauer, Hucci, Grandtheft, and Pusher.

Dec 26-27, BC Place Stadium (777 Pacific Boulevard). Tix from $99 (plus service charges and fees) at www.contact-festival.com/.

2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS BURTON CUMMINGS The Canadian rockpop vocalist and former Guess Who member performs with his band. Dec 29, 8 pm, Molson Canadian Theatre at Hard Rock (2080 United Blvd.). The concert also runs Dec 31 at the River Rock Casino Resort.

Tix $99.50/89.50 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ticketmaster.ca/.

MACHINEDRUM North Carolina-born electronica artist, with guest Greazus.

Dec 29, 9 pm, Fortune Sound Club (147 E. Pender). Tix $15 (plus service charges and fees) at www.bplive.ca/.

UNDER THE STREETLAMP Evening celebrates the music of Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons from the Broadway musical Jersey Boys. Dec 30-31, Stadium Club (Edgewater Casino, 760 Pacific Blvd. S.).

Tix from $59.50 (plus service charges and fees) at edgewatercasino.showare.com/.

KIM MITCHELL Canadian party-rocker and former Max Webster member (“Go For Soda”, “Patio Lanterns”). Dec 30, 8 pm, River Rock Show Theatre (River Rock Casino Resort, 8811 River Rd.). Tix $39.50 (plus service charges and fees) at www.ticketmaster.ca/.

BLUE MARTINI JAZZ CAFE 1516 Yew, 604-428-2691. Live jazz, soul, and blues.

COBALT 917 Main, 778-918-3671. Live bands some nights, DJs other nights.

Karaoke Mon, classic tunes and free pizza Tue; live painting art raffle Wed. 2THE LEMON TWIGS Feb 1 2SERATONES Feb 4 2CHERRY GLAZERR Feb 7 2HIPPO CAMPUS Feb 23 2MOON DUO Mar 4 COMMODORE BALLROOM 868 Granville, 604-739-4550. General admission venue with 900-person capacity features live performances by touring bands and musicians from across North America and around the world. Tix at www.com modoreballroom.com/. 2FUNK THE HALLS Dec 21 2THE ORIGINAL UGLY CHRISTMAS SWEATER PARTY Dec 23 2TIM HICKS AND CHAD BROWNLEE Jan 7 2T.I. Jan 12 2IT’S JUST DRAG! Jan 13 2ECCW WRESTLING: BALLROOM BRAWL VII Jan 14 2THE FIGHTER AND THE KID LIVE Jan 19 2STEEL PANTHER Jan 20 2AFI Jan 24 2BIG WRECK Jan 27 2STING Feb 1 2JOHN K. SAMSON AND THE WINTER WHEAT Feb 2 2SONREAL Feb 3 2REEL BIG FISH AND ANTI-FLAG Feb 9 2USS Feb 10 2MATTHEW GOOD Feb 16 2THE PHILOSOPHER KINGS Mar 6 2THE CADILLAC THREE Mar 8 2BLACKIE AND THE RODEO KINGS Mar 10 2CHRONIXX Mar 18 2JAPANDROIDS Mar 20 2MOTHER MOTHER Mar 25 2THE TEA PARTY Mar 31 2THE DAMNED Apr 15 2THE ZOMBIES Apr 21 2DWEEZIL ZAPPA Apr 25 2TESTAMENT May 10 2BONOBO May 25

BOXING DAYS

SALE STOREWIDE SALE DECEMBER 26 & 27

PUFF EASTSIDE 1204 Commercial Dr. 604-879-8991

PUFF WESTSIDE 1838 West 4th Ave. 604-739-0022

PUFF UPTOWN 3255 Main St. 604-708-9804

PUFF DOWNTOWN 1109 Granville St. 604-684-7833

DOOLIN’S IRISH PUB 654 Nelson, 604605-4343. Live music Sun-Thu, with acoustic soloist or duo Sun-Wed and live band Thu DJ Fri-Sat. FORTUNE SOUND CLUB 147 E. Pender, 604-569-1758. Featured nights include Happy Ending Fridays, Sup Fu? Saturdays, Hip Hop Karaoke, and live shows covering electronic, rap, hip-hop, dubstep, and metal. 2MACHINEDRUM Dec 29 2HOLY FUCK Jan 19 2DREAM WARRIORS Jan 24 2THE KNOCKS Feb 3 2PROF Feb 11 2THE STAVES Feb 17 2P.O.S Mar 3 2ISAIAH RASHAD Mar 22

FOX CABARET 2321 Main. Multi-room arts and culture venue in Mount Pleasant showcases live music, DJs, comedy, and NO B.S. NEW YEAR’S EVE PIZZA performance, including monthlies HEAVEN, PARTY Party on down to music by Devil Rapp Battlez, and Motown Party. Sunday in the Wood Shack, Gold Stars Are for Service improv comedy Sun; Séance with Suckers, the Godspot, Dadweed, and DJ Darwin Meyers Sun; The Zodiac Club Rambone and the Wet Reality. Dec 31, 9 with DJ Magneticring Wed; The Warm Up pm, WISE Hall (1882 Adanac). Tix $10. with DJs Neighbour & Kut Thurs. 2NERD NITE 1ST ANNUAL: FACT TO THE FUTURE FINAL COUNTDOWN TO MIDNIGHT Dec 21 2FOX HOLE STAND-UP COMEDY Celebrate New Year’s Eve with Elvis Dec 21 2CATE LE BON AND TIM PRESLEY impersonator Brian Simpson. Dec 31–Jan 1, Jan 16 2SCULPTRESS: THE MUSIC OF 9 pm–1 am, Old Admiral Pub & Grill (4125 NICOLE LIZÉE Jan 30 2PARSONSFIELD Feb E. Hastings, Burnaby). Free admission, 23 2TINDER TALES Feb 24 2THE RURAL info www.ultimateelvis.ca/.

ALBERTA ADVANTAGE Feb 25 2JOEY LANDRETH Mar 3 NYE 2017 Celebrate the new year with performances by Doza, Luke McKeehan, FUNKY WINKER BEANS 37 W. Hastings.

Evil Bastard Karaoke Experience Sun-Thurs.

Joel Armstrong, Mike McSuede, and Iain Howie. Dec 31–Jan 1, 10 pm–4 am, Open HARBOUR EVENT CENTRE 750 Pacific Studios (200-252 E. 1st). Tix $35, info www.

Blvd.. Former location of the Plush and facebook.com/events/227518977653631/.

Gossip nightclubs, massive room features sound production from D & B, over 100 NEW YEAR’S IN NEW WEST New state-of-the-art LED panels and lighting, Year’s Eve party features music by and special effects with CO2 cannons, Rumba 7, DJ Rico, and DJ Traxx. Dec confetti, and indoor fireworks.

31–Jan 1, 10 pm–4 am, MagnetiQ Club

Lounge. Tix $30, info www.magnetiq nightclub.com/index.php?option=com_ k2&view=item&id=57&Itemid=562.

CLUBS & VENUES ALEXANDER GASTOWN 91 Powell, 778379-0407. Gastown club, lounge, and live music venue featuring weekly club nights and various concerts. 2GREAT GOOD FINE OK Jan 16 2DUMBFOUNDED Jan 26 2LIZZO Jan 27 2VALLIS ALPS Mar 11 AT THE WALDORF 1489 E. Hastings, 604253-7141. Three separate rooms, including Tiki Room, Tabu, and the Hideaway. Woo

THE IMPERIAL 319 Main, 604-868-0494.

2BEAR’S DEN Jan 21 2BENJAMIN FRANCIS LEFTWICH Feb 4 2LOS CAMPESINOS Feb 21 2BANNERS Feb 25 2THE WOOD BROTHERS Mar 12 2CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH Mar 18 2STRFKR Mar 22 2AGNES OBEL Mar 25 2MARTHA WAINWRIGHT Apr 24 2METACOSM Apr 29 IVANHOE PUB 1038 Main, 604-608-1444.

Pub with live bands on weekends and open jam night Sun from 4 to 8 pm. Open at 9 am with breakfast and daily food specials. Pool tourney Thu. No cover.

see next page

DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 53

Music time out

from previous page

LAMPLIGHTER PUBLIC HOUSE 92 Water, 604-687-4424. Pub trivia with Nice Guys Inc. Tue; bourbon and bingo Wed; Rocksteady with DJs Arems, Hoppa & Rexx Thu; FKYA DJs Fri; DJ Antonia & Friends Sat. LIBRARY SQUARE PUBLIC HOUSE 300 W. Georgia, 604-633-9644. Free pinball Wed, Show Me Love ‘90s party Fri; Saturday Night Special dance party Sat. Canucks and Whitecaps pregame.

MEDIA CLUB 695 Cambie, 604-608-2871.

Live music most nights. 2FEAR OF NOISE Dec 30 MOLSON CANADIAN THEATRE AT HARD ROCK 2080 United Blvd., 604-5236888. Thousand-seat entertainment venue showcases leading Canadian and international acts. 2BURTON CUMMINGS Dec 29 2LOVERBOY Dec 31 ORPHEUM THEATRE 601 Smithe, 604665-3050. 2SAM ROBERTS BAND Feb 7 2COLIN JAMES Mar 8 2PASSENGER Mar 25 2KALEO Apr 4 PRINCETON PUB & GRILL 1901 Powell, 604-253-6645. Live music on Thursdays with the Palomars (first Thu of every month), the Honky Tonk Dilettantes (second Thu),

Sick Boss (third Thu), and Gabriel DuBreuil (fourth Thu). Jam session Tue, trivia night Wed, live local bands Fri-Sat, and karaoke Sun. No cover.

VOTE Apr 1 2AMORPHIS Apr 3 2ELECTRIC SIX Apr 5 2SOHN Apr 8 2ASPHYX Apr 30 2DELAIN AND HAMMERFALL May 5 2SABATON May 7

QUEEN ELIZABETH THEATRE 650 Hamilton, 604-665-3050. 2BLUE RODEO Jan 27 2LYLE LOVETT AND JOHN HIATT Mar 6 2BRIAN WILSON Apr 8

RIVER ROCK SHOW THEATRE River Rock Casino Resort, 8811 River Rd., 604-2478900. Tix for all shows at www.ticketmaster. ca/. 2DONNY & MARIE Dec 21-22 2KIM MITCHELL Dec 30 2THE ROBERT CRAY BAND Mar 3 2ENGELBERT HUMPERDINCK Mar 10 2ABBAMANIA Mar 18

REPUBLIC 958 Granville, 604-669-3214.

House, hip-hop, EDM, chart, and reggae.

Open nightly from 10 pm to 3 am.

RICKSHAW THEATRE 254 E. Hastings, 604-681-8915. Live bands some nights.

2BLACK WIZARD AND BLACK BREATH Dec 31 2MIDGE URE Jan 5 2THE WORLD HAS NO EYEDEA Jan 6 2COMEDY SHOCKER XI: SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES Jan 7 2KYLE MORTON Jan 9 2TEQUILA MOCKINGBIRD ORCHESTRA 10TH ANNIVERSARY SHOW Jan 12 2FRIDAY THE 13TH Jan 13 2BOWIE BALL: A CELEBRATION OF THE LIFE AND MUSIC OF DAVID BOWIE Jan 14 2DIRKSCHNEIDER Jan 19 2HIGH ON FIRE Jan 20 2ENTOMBED A.D. Jan 22 2THE SUPER DUPER SHOW Jan 27 2BLACK LIPS Feb 1 2LORDI Feb 2 2MAYHEM Feb 3 2ALCEST Feb 4 2THE WHAMMY AWARDS Feb 10 2WHITE LIES Feb 11 2WAX TAILOR Feb 17 2THUNDERCAT Feb 17 2POLYRHYTHMICS Feb 25 2DESERT DAZE TOUR Feb 26 2KREATOR Mar 29 2D.O.A.: ROCK THE

ROGERS ARENA 800 Griffiths Way, 604899-7400. 2DIERKS BENTLEY Feb 9 2RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS Mar 18 2ARIANA GRANDE Mar 24 2CHRIS STAPLETON Mar 27 2THE WEEKND Apr 25 2LIONEL RICHIE Apr 27 2NEIL DIAMOND Jul 24 2BRUNO MARS Jul 26 2ROGER WATERS Oct 28 THE ROXY 932 Granville, 604-331-7999.

House band Tattoo Alibi Sat & Mon; country band Locked & Loaded Sun; the Bulge and DJ Joe Pound Tue; Troys ‘R Us WedThu. 2CHEAP THRILLS VOLUME SIX: GREG DRUMMOND Dec 22 2LAS DIVAS Dec 23 2AIR STRANGER, EVENT HORIZON Dec 30 ST. JAMES HALL 3214 W. 10th, 604-736-3022.

250-seat venue at St. James Community Square features concerts presented by the Rogue Folk Club. 2DAVID BECKINGHAM AND TWIN BANDIT Jan 13 2ANNA AND ELIZABETH Feb 3 2STARMAN: AN ACOUSTIC EVENING OF BOWIE SONGS

Feb 5 2CAJUN COUNTRY REVIVAL Feb 10 2ALASDAIR FRASER AND NATALIE HAAS Feb 12 2THE GONZALO BERGARA QUARTET Feb 13 2OLD MAN LUEDECKE Feb 17 2KIÉRAH Mar 3

VENUE 881 Granville, 604-646-0064.

2CASH CASH Dec 22 2A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE (SNAK THE RIPPER/MERKULES) Dec 23 2FAKE NYE: SOUL GOOD Dec 30 2NYE 2017 Dec 31 2TALIB KWELI Jan 25 2TOM GREEN Feb 10 2TRENTEMOLLER Mar 10 2SAVE FERRIS Mar 18 2LADYHAWKE Mar 24 2WHY? Mar 25 2KATATONIA Apr 5 VOGUE THEATRE 918 Granville, 604-5691144. Entertainment venue specializing in all-ages concerts by touring acts from around the world. Tix at www. voguetheatre.com/. 2US THE DUO Jan 27 2ADAM ANT Feb 4 2RUN THE JEWELS Feb 8 2LIFTOFF Feb 19 2WILLIAM SINGE Feb 22 2VINCE STAPLES Feb 28 2SEBASTIAN MANISCALCO Mar 11 2MØ Mar 17 2ZUCCHERO Mar 22 2DAN + SHAY Mar 25 2MARC MARON Mar 26 2BILL AND JOEL PLASKETT Apr 1 2KING GIZZARD AND THE LIZARD WIZARD Apr 10 2MAYDAY PARADE Apr 13 2THE VISIONARY ART AND LIFE OF ALEX GREY AND ALLYSON GREY Apr 28 2SAID THE WHALE Apr 29 2KEHLANI May 1 2BIANCA DEL RIO May 19 2THE MOTH May 20

WISE HALL 1882 Adanac, 604-254-5858.

Live music by local artists and international touring acts. 2BLANCHE NORTON ALL-STAR FUNDRAISER Dec 22 2 PETUNIA AND THE VIPERS Dec 26 2NO B.S. NEW YEAR’S EVE PIZZA PARTY Dec 31 2JAMES MCCARTNEY May 13

OUT OF TOWN 2UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS SNOWBOMBING CANADA Music by Kaskade, Ludacris, Bob Moses, Duke Dumont, Getter, Netsky, Oliver Heldens, Pete Tong, Snakehips, Thomas Jack, AC Slater, Ardalan, Branchez, Peking Duk, Soul Clap, Tennyson, the Funk Hunters, Caleb Calloway, Dre Morel, Expendable Youth, Flipout, Mat the Alien,, My!Gay!Husband!, and Yurie. Apr 6-10, Sun Peaks Resort. Tix at www.snowbombingcanada.com/.

TIME OUT MUSIC LISTINGS are a public service provided free of charge, based on available space and editorial discretion. We can’t guarantee inclusion, and we give priority to events taking place within one week of publication.

Submit listings online using the event-submission form at straight.com/AddEvent. Events that don’t make it into the paper due to space constraints will appear on the website.

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THE RED CROSS Canadian Red Cross / Croix-Rouge Canadienne

54 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

www.redcross.ca

HOUSING

The year in real estate

T

his was a very memorable year in the history of Vancouver’s housing market. Here are some highlights and lowlights of 2016:

June 29 Premier Christy Clark announces that her government will eliminate the self-regulation of real-estate agents. She says that the Real Estate Council of B.C.’s authority will be transferred to a new independent superintendent of real estate.

February 8 On Family Day, NDP housing critic David Eby invites reporters to his West Broad- July 9 Vancouver Sun columnist Pete McMartin way constituency office to talk about the real- declares that racism underlies the public’s reacestate market. After they arrive, he lists a litany tion to the hot housing market. He’s thoroughly of improprieties, even alleging that the province trashed on Twitter. could be losing hundreds of millions of dollars in tax revenue because of “shadow flipping”. This July 11 Georgia Straight writer Travis Lupick involves assignments of contracts to buy being writes a lengthy article titled “History shows raresold at a profit multiple times to third parties cism has always been a part of Vancouver real before a closing date. Accordestate”. Lupick is thoroughly ing to Eby, home sellers aren’t trashed on Twitter. aware of this skulduggery by their agents, which results in July 13 Lupick writes a folCharlie Smith several commissions on a sinlow-up titled “Revisiting real gle sale. At the news conference, Eby also claims estate, race, and how the foreign-buyers narrathat false addresses are being given to the federal tive came to dominate Vancouver media”. He agency that monitors money-laundering to con- quotes UBC journalism prof and social-media ceal foreign buying of Vancouver real estate. expert Alfred Hermida, who cited Palestinian-American scholar Edward Said’s asserFebruary 9 The Real Estate Council of B.C. an- tion that there is often an eagerness to blame nounces that the chair of the Financial Insti- “the other” for societal problems. Hermida tutions Commission of B.C., Carolyn Rogers, also points out that people share stories that will chair an independent advisory group to confi rm their existing beliefs, which is why look into Eby’s allegations. articles on foreign buyers are passed around more readily than those on zoning regulaJune 2 Real-estate marketer Bob Rennie tells tions. After the article appears, Lupick is again the Urban Development Institute that 193,000 thoroughly trashed on Twitter.

Metro Vancouver homes are owned clear-title by people over 55 years of age. According to July 25 Premier Christy Clark imposes a 15-perRennie, the value of these residences is $197 bil- cent tax on foreign buyers of residential real lion—up from the $66 billion owned clear-title estate in Metro Vancouver, generating outrage by the region’s baby boomers a decade earlier. from the real-estate industry.

He says that this equity is fuelling record demand for housing as older homeowners make July 28 Trade lawyer Barry Appleton calls the money available to their kids and grandkids for foreign-buyers tax a “glaring violation of our down payments. “A foreign ownership tax of 10 trade treaties”, including the North American percent on a $5-million home will not stop a sale Free Trade Agreement. or create any affordability,” Rennie claims. “And after six months when a foreign-ownership tax December 15 Premier Christy Clark announces fails, it will only cause racially charged conver- that first-time homebuyers can borrow up to sations to go beyond where they are now.” $37,500 interest-free for five years for down payments. It’s only open to Canadian citizens and June 28 The independent advisory group recom- permanent residents in Canada for five years. mends raising the maximum fine from $10,000 to $250,000 for licensed real-estate agents who December 20 TransLink reveals it will collect break the rules. It also calls for maximum fines $440 million by 2022 for the sale of its 5.6-hecof $500,000 for brokerages, up from the previ- tare Oakridge Transit Centre lands to Intergulf–Modern Green Development. ous maximum of $20,000.

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To all my Clients & Friends, wishing you a joyful holiday season and a healthy and prosperous 2017

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HAPPY HOLIDAYS May you and your loved ones have a wonderful Holiday Season and a prosperous New Year!

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DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 55

straight stars December 22 to 28, 2016

M

ercury in Capricorn has just started a three-week retrograde tour. As is typical, the cycle can mess with plans, communications, mobility, the budget, and decision-making. Double-check everything; revise as necessary. Count your change; save your receipts. When in doubt, delay or take a pass.

The transit tends to give us a run for it, but it also holds benefit. It’s timely to reconnect, remember, honour, and slow down. Shift work to second place and personal life to first. A mix of the traditional and nontraditional is the best way to navigate through the holidays.

By Thursday, most of us will feel checked out of the office. Even though Friday/Saturday can be full to the brim, the go is mostly smooth-running. Saturn in harmony with Uranus puts all of us on the same page. Let’s be open; let’s be good to self, to other, and to all.

The moon transits Scorpio from Friday through Christmas Day, stirring deep emotions regarding the past, the present, and the asyet-unwritten future. Despite how difficult the holidays can be for many, overall the conversation, connecting, and social atmosphere are upbeat.

No matter how or with whom, Venus in Aquarius suggests a happy medium prevails on Christmas Day. It comes; it goes—we’re over the holidays in a flash. Jupiter/Uranus hit the ground running on Boxing Day Monday. It’s a get-going, cut-to-

the-chase, strike-f lint day. Tuesday continues the good trend. Wednesday’s Capricorn new moon aligned with Mercury retrograde is informing or news-generating. Use this day to talk, reconnect, resume, renegotiate, re-sign, to make it official, or to get a head start on your New Year’s resolution.

‫ﺎ‬

ARIES

March 20–April 20

For the next few weeks, Mercury retrograde keeps you focused on the long past and the long overdue. Don’t waste time on regret, fear, or doubt; you’ll get yourself there soon enough. You’ll feel it deeply, profoundly, Christmas Eve through Christmas Day; the words don’t need to be said. Boxing Day through newmoon Wednesday reenergizes you.

‫ﺏ‬

TAURUS

April 20–May 21

Mercury retrograde is best spent taking time out and/or putting the brakes on anything that has been getting the better of you. A short vacation or temporary pause will do you plenty of good. The Scorpio moon and Venus at peak from Friday through Christmas pack high emotional impact. Soak it up; make it special; show up—let them know how much you care.

‫ﺐ‬

GEMINI

May 21–June 21

Indirectly, Mercury retrograde may be helpful to your budget.

You could run out of time, or it could be difficult to find something

> BY ROSE MARCUS

appropriate or appealing. Christmas heart brims to overflow. Time and Day through Boxing Day, the stars quality attention are the most pretug on the heart but good. Venus cious gifts you can give and receive. in Aquarius keeps the connection LIBRA stimulating, upbeat, and fun. Monday September 23–October 23 through Wednesday could thrust you Thursday could keep you into it, perhaps unexpectedly so. on a sprint. Folks pop up everywhere; CANCER it shouldn’t surprise you, but the gifts June 21–July 22 or news could. Friday through SunStaying the course can be day keep you submerged, richly so. a challenge on Thursday. Take it as Venus in Aquarius starts Christmas it comes; make it up as you go along. Day on a bright note. You won’t be Despite Mercury retrograde, Friday hanging out for long. As of Monday, through Christmas Day should go rela- you’re already on full steam ahead. tively easy on you. Venus in Aquarius Tuesday/Wednesday keeps it fresh is good for the social end. The Scorpio and in motion. moon makes the holiday a particularly SCORPIO emotional one this year. As of Boxing October 23–November 22 Day, you are already over it.

Friday through Sunday, the LEO Scorpio moon has you fully present July 22–August 23 and on full show. The next few days Mercury retrograde could are yours to own. It’s the simple necessitate a change of plans, sched- things and the special people in your ule, or choices, but with Saturn and life that keep your heart on overflow.

Uranus in such good shape, no mat- Monday, you’re anxious to get a move ter how it shapes up, it’ll work out on. A change of scenery or topic does just fine. Friday through Christmas you plenty of good. If you can, give Day, give your best to family and your yourself extra breathing space. lover, or share your wealth with good SAGITTARIUS friends. The moon in Scorpio and November 22–December 21 Venus help you to make the most of it.

Thursday could keep you VIRGO out with the crowds or on a social August 23–September 23 track, but as of Friday, it’s time to pull Thursday can be a cutoff or back. The moon in Scorpio draws you let-yourself-off-the-hook day. Spend into the deeper realms/yearnings of extra on the convenience and don’t your heart and soul. Christmas Day waste your time. Ideally timed for the can be a private, romantic, or social holidays, Mercury retrograde is good affair; either way, it’s high on the for a personal and priority regroup. satisfaction scale. Christmas evening Friday through Christmas Day, the through Tuesday, you’ll perk right up.

‫ﺔ‬

‫ﺑ‬

‫ﺕ‬

‫ﺒ‬

‫ﺖ‬

‫ﺓ‬

‫ﺊ‬

CAPRICORN

December 21–January 20

Extra output, extra creativity, or fast thinking may be required Thursday. Go with your gut instincts. A blend of the traditional and nontraditional is ideal for the holidays. No matter what or who may be missing, Friday through Christmas Day you’ll feel blessed to be here now. Monday through Wednesday pushes your refresh button in some significant way.

‫ﺋ‬

AQUARIUS

January 20–February 18

You’re in for a good one!

This holiday weekend does right by you in all the best ways. Thursday is full to the brim. Friday through Sunday are a smooth go. Venus in Aquarius hits the sweet spot on Christmas Day. Uranus dives into it fresh and fast on Boxing Day Monday. You’re on a great roll through Wednesday.

‫ﺌ‬

PISCES

February 18–March 20

Overspending is likely Thursday—but, hey, it’s par for the holidays. Friday through Christmas Day, emotions run the show.

The words don’t need to be said.

You feel it; they feel it. Soak it in; soak it up. Monday/Tuesday are great for travel, skiing, a fresh infusion, or a fresh go at it. Duty calls on Wednesday. -

Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah!

Book your 2017 astrology reading now at www.rosemarcus.com/astrolink/.

CAREERS & EMPLOYMENT

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(778) 996-0369 • www.bc.abuyerschoice.com 56 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017

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savage love I’m having an issue with my boyfriend, and I don’t know if I am the crazy, paranoid, controlling party here. We have been together for more than a year and a half. We had troubles early on because he has a low sex drive. It made me very insecure, and I think that’s why, at the time, I became extremely jealous of his friendship with his very attractive intern. I fully owned up to my irrational jealousy and decided on my own that it was my responsibility to overcome that.

She eventually stopped working with him, and they haven’t been in contact for over sex months. Fastforward to the present. On Monday night, I asked my boyfriend what his plans were on Tuesday. (I am studying for law-school exams, so I knew I wouldn’t have time to spend with him.) Around 8:30 on Tuesday, he texted me and asked how studying was going, and I asked him again what his plans were. He told me he was going to meet an “old coworker” at a bar for birthday drinks. I didn’t think twice about it. Then, around 11:30 when I got in bed to relax, I saw on my Instagram feed that his old intern posted a photo of her birthday party at the bar. I became extremely upset, because instead of being up front and saying he was meeting HER for her birthday, he was intentionally ambiguous. I confronted him when he got home, and he admitted to being ambiguous to avoid a “freak-out”.

I told him that if he’d been up-front with me, I would have been jealous but I would have also been mindful

of my toxic feelings and not projected them onto him. I told him that as a result of how he handled it, I feel worse, I feel lied to, and I feel insecure. He acted like I was being ridiculous. He insisted it was a lastminute invite and he didn’t want to cause any drama. We went to sleep, and I woke up feeling pretty much over it. But when he got into the shower, I looked at his phone and saw that she had actually invited him on Monday afternoon. So he lied to me when I asked him what his plans were on Tuesday, and he lied to me again when he said it was a last-minute invite. I am not upset with him for getting drinks with her—most of his friends are female and I NEVER feel jealous about them. I have a weird tic about this girl, though, and I’ve owned up to it. I don’t want to control him, but I feel like I can’t trust him now. Up until now, I’ve never once suspected him of being dishonest. > AM I CRAZY?

Sex months? Interesting typo.

There’s another way to read your boyfriend’s ambiguity/obfuscation/ dishonesty about Tuesday night: equal parts considerate and selfserving. Your boyfriend knew you had to study, he knew his ex-intern is a sore subject/weird tic, and by opting for ambiguity he allowed you to focus on your studies. So that was maybekindasorta considerate of him. And since one person’s “mindful of my toxic feelings” and “handling it” is another person’s “freak-out” and “invasion of privacy”,

> BY DAN SAVAGE AIC, your boyfriend opted for ambiguousness/deceit-by-omission to avoid drama. And perhaps that was self-serving of him.

Want to prove to your boyfriend that he didn’t need to lie to you about spending time with his exintern? Retroactively bestow your blessing on Tuesday night’s birthday drinks and stop raking him over the fucking coals for his thoroughly explicable actions. (They’re so explicable, I just explicked the shit out of them.) Yes, he lied to you. But unless you’re made of marshmallow fluff and unicorn farts, AIC, you’ve lied to him once or twice over the last year and a half. Even the “most honest” people on Earth tell the odd harmless, selfserving white lie once in a while. If you want your relationship to last, AIC, you roll your eyes at the odd HSSW lie and move on. If you want your relationship to end, you do exactly what you’re doing.

If your boyfriend hasn’t given you some other reason(s) to believe he’s cheating with his ex-intern or anyone else, AIC, drop the Tuesday night/ birthday drinks subject. I would also advise you to apologize to your boyfriend for having “looked at his phone” while he was in the shower, which is both an asshole move and, yes, a sign that you might be the crazy, paranoid, and controlling one in this relationship. And for the sake of your relationship—for the sake of fuck—stop following the ex-intern on Instagram.

Finally, AIC, you mention mismatched sex drives. As several

commenters pointed out on my blog, where your letter appeared as the Savage Love Letter of the Day, mismatched sex drives are usually a bad sign. You talk about the libido issue in the past tense, so perhaps it’s not a problem anymore. But if the problem was resolved in a way that left you feeling neglected, insecure, and frustrated, it wasn’t resolved and it constitutes a much bigger threat to your relationship than that ex-intern.

I’m a 35-year-old man in a serious relationship—the best I’ve ever been in—with a girl I’ll likely marry. I’m happy with monogamy, aside from one aspect: I have a foot fetish that’s getting stronger with age and I can’t bear the thought of never sucking another girl’s toes again. I should note that my girlfriend is more than happy to shove her feet in my mouth, but I fantasize almost constantly about other women’s feet. I’m tempted to find paid foot girls, something I’ve done in the past but never while in a relationship. But that would be cheating, right? I don’t think I can bring myself to ask for my girlfriend’s blessing, and I’d be shocked if she offered it. What do I do?

might want to have with her in the future (and ones she might want to have with you). If she’s curious and interested and upbeat during these convos and about your kinks, suggest going to a foot-fetish party together—one where you can suck other women’s toes and other men can suck hers.

I’m a man

who is sexually attracted to trans women. I’ve been told that if I’m attracted to women, it shouldn’t matter what genitals they have. I’ve also been told that if I like penis, it shouldn’t matter if the owner presents as male or female. Am I unfairly fetishizing trans women? > GAIN UNDERSTANDING INTO LOVING TRANS

You’re attracted to women, GUILT, some women have penises, and you find penis-having women particularly attractive. If you’re not attracted to men with penises and you’re not attracted to men like Buck Angel, i.e., trans men with vaginas, then you’re not attracted to men generally, cock or no cock.

So long as you can state your preferences in a way that doesn’t dehumanize the people you are attracted to > FEAR OF MISSING OUT ON FEET or denigrate the people you aren’t attracted to, GUILT, you have You bring yourself to ask, FOMOOF, nothing to feel self-conscious or even if you have to drag your ass guilty about. there. If your girlfriend is sex-positive—if she’s not just shoving her feet It’s the Savage Lovecast Christmas in your mouth to shut you up—initi- Spectacular! Listen at savagelove ate conversations about your kinks cast.com. Email: mail@savagelove. (and hers), your sexual history (and net . Follow Dan on Twitter @fake hers), and sexual adventures you dansavage.

The Georgia Straight Confessions, an outlet for submitting revelations about your private lives—or for the voyeurs among us who want to read what other people have disclosed. > Go on-line to read hundreds of I Saw You posts or to respond to a message < PACIFIC- SNOW DAY SUNDAY’S

s

Scan to confess There’s an easy solution I hate when you email someone asking for information and instead of just replying they phone when you’re not available and leave voicemail messages asking you to call them.

The people in my life who talk too much will be getting Gilmore Girls Gift sets.

Believe it or not I’m a big heavy woman in my fifties. I’m happily married for a long time. I get teased at and made fun of all the time by strangers. People are mean. I always think, are they happy with themselves for what they just said to me? But when I look in my the mirror, I see a beautiful woman, and I don’t understand the hate.

Babies Are hard to make. Trying to get pregnant is saddening and overwhelming sometimes. It’s hard to be optimistic when every month you find out that it hasn’t happened yet.

So I said “Happy Holidays!” to someone yesterday. It was an innocent, friendly greeting. Unfortunately that seemed to set them off - they responded “it’s not a crime to say merry Christmas.” I rolled my eyes at him. See, I’m Jewish. Well, culturally Jewish, not much of a believer anymore, but Christmas was always something I was excluded from. So to all you “say merry Christmas” people out there, understand that not all of us celebrate your holiday. Accept the fucking “happy holiday” as a god-damn compliment.

I cry too easy It’s embarrassing, I’m almost 30. I’ll be watching a movie and start crying, or sitting in the bus and start tearing up. Sometimes I’m thinking of something and sometimes nothing at all and the tears will fall. Someone can ask me if I’m ok and I’ll start crying. The fuck is my problem?

Visit

to post a Confession

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: NOVEMBER 14, 2016 WHERE: Third beach, Stanley Park

It’s rare people talk to each other in Vancouver... I saw you walking up and we exchanged a quick glance.

You told me I was Brave for wearing ripped jean’s on a snow day. Not so brave when nothing comes out of my mouth is it?!. Too be fully honest, I was shocked as Men don’t usually approach me sober. Maybe you were just being friendly:) I would like to find out though mystery man with a great smile in front of BSP Bikes on Pacific.

You were blocking off the sea wall and me and my friend were riding by on bikes. We stopped at third beach to look at the view and you came over to ask us about our detour through the park. We chatted for a while and you seemed really interesting and super friendly. My friend said something funny about you busting blow jobs in East Van... I was the other girl! I’d love to get a drink sometime if you remember me :)

WHITE SUVS AT CAPILANO CHEVRON

DOING LUNGES IN BURNABY

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 16, 2016 WHERE: Gilmore SkyTrain

I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 18, 2016 WHERE: Capilano Road Chevron Station, North Vancouver We both pulled up to fill our mid-size SUVs at the Capilano Chevron in North Van. 1 point: same colour cars. You smiled and said hello before heading in to pay for gas. 2 points: we both had on grey toques. Great smile and I caught you peeking.

Let’s grab tacos sometime and talk about our white cars... or other stuff too :)

CUTIE AT BOWS X ARROWS ON FRASER ST.

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Happy holidays

s

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 18, 2016 WHERE: Vancouver

s

Gifts for talk takers

PARK RANGER ON THE SEAWALL

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 13, 2016 WHERE: BOWS X ARROWS on Fraser Street Well, hopefully you see this.

You: toque, long dark hair, jeans, and blundstones. Me: hair in messy bun at first then hair down with a toque later, grey shirt, flannel, and blundstones. You came in with (hopefully) a friend and sat near the end of the long table close to the door in the middle of the coffee shop, I was sitting alone at a table in the back with my Mac and headphones on. We kept catching each other staring. You kept playing with your hair as you were talking to your friend, I thought that was really cute.

You left before I did, I wish I stopped to tell you I thought you were beautiful. Let me buy you a coffee?

You were the super amazing and bubbly Asian girl. I was the scruffy, tired, dude that just got off work.... If I only had the words to describe how much you brightened my day... even if we were just coffee mates, you’re company would be such a bright spot... find me.

CHEVRON CAMBIE & 16

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 16, 2016 WHERE: Chevron You: hot guy filling up across from me. Me: tall blonde that you made a joke to as I was leaving... I regret not staying to talk more! If you’re interested in meeting for a drink sometime, send me a message!

RED CROSS IRISH CUTIE

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 13, 2016 WHERE: W 15th, Point Grey Area Here goes nothing and it could very well have just been your Irish charm and it was all in my head. You came to my door and did your pitch and normally I would have stopped you but something about your eyes made me stay. I told you I was unemployed on disability and you asked me if I was okay. Something tells me you’re special. I’d love to grab a drink.

SNOWSHOES MEET SKIS ON SEYMOUR

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 16, 2016 WHERE: Mount Seymour As I struggled up the steep part to Brockton Point in my skis, my friend commented that this only happens in front of the pretty girls. Well, it happens other times too, but he got the pretty part right :D Would you like to join us for a hike together sometime?

WOMAN SERVING AT MEET ON MAIN

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 15, 2016 WHERE: Meet on Main You were serving tonight at Meet on Main. You have blonde hair, were wearing jeans and a black top. I came in and sat by myself for about half an hour before my mom came and joined me. You will probably never see this, but I want to tell you that I think you are gorgeous and really friendly.

BEAUTY AT SHOPPERS ON GRANVILLE AND DUNSMUIR

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 14, 2016 WHERE: Shoppers Drugmart - Granville and Georgia You were the beauty in a beige coat visiting cosmetics on Wednesday morning.

When you were leaving we made eyes. Was fortunate to see you again ten minutes later as I rode by. We waved. I should have stopped traffic to come say hi.

A TRIANGLE-TATTOOED STAFF AT CACTUS CLUB CAFE

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 11, 2016 WHERE: Cactus Club Cafe Five of my good-dorky friends and I had dinner last night - it was a busy Sunday night. You were my server.

You touched lightly on my arms. Ever since I was little I hated touching. However, I didn’t hate it. I was just bit anxious. And I did/said dumb things the whole time.

All I wanted to tell you is how beautiful you are [Just letting you know you are like a 20 out of 10].

AWESOME AND CUTE BARISTA

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 12, 2016 WHERE: Starbucks at Cambie and 19th Me: guy with curly hair; winter jacket, who ordered a glass of water. You: supercute barista with pink highlights. Wish I could have spared a moment to chat with you. Perhaps we could introduce ourselves over coffee (preferably at a location other than Starbucks)?

THE LAMPLIGHTER

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 10, 2016 WHERE: The Lamplighter It was a night of dancing and fun. I was dancing with a friend and you came up and were dancing. At one point you put your arm on my shoulder and we looked at each other. Scrunched up our noses. Then kissed and went our separate ways. You were wearing a suit.

PULP FICTION BOOKS

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 10, 2016 WHERE: Main Street Pulp Fiction Books.

This is a total long shot. But I saw you @ pulp fiction books on Main today around 1:30 ish. You were wearing a black toque and black jacket - I think. You were shorter than me. We made eye contact twice. Ugh. This is useless.

No one reads these.

LOCKED EYES WHILE CROSSING STREET ON DEC 08

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I SAW A: I AM A: WHEN: DECEMBER 8, 2016 WHERE: Corner of Pacific and Hornby I was the guy wearing a black peacoat waiting for the light to turn at the corner of Pacific and Hornby around noon on Dec 08 when I first noticed you looking at me from across the street. Our eyes remained locked when we both crossed the street and walked past each other. If I wasn’t on my way to a lunch meeting, I would have turned around and tried to talk to you. If for some strange cosmic reason that you see this post, I would love to take you out.

Visit straight.com to post your FREE I Saw You _ DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT 59

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For More Information call Today Toll-Free www.volken.org 60 THE GEORGIA STRAIGHT DECEMBER 22 / 2016 – JANUARY 5 / 2017