The Hobson June 18

june 2018

far north pony tales p the von trapps in remuera local news, views & informed opinions

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The June Issue, No. 49 8

29

the editor’s letter

the doctor

10

Starship paediatrician Simon Rowley releases a memoir, Mind That Child (see below for details on how to win a copy)

the columnists

32

13

the journey

the village Maria was no problem to solve when she stayed at Baradene, new schools in the neighbourhood, Ōrākei Local Board’s leadership changes, and more

Iceland — ice, Game of Thrones locations and adorably shaggy ponies. Stacy Gregg visits in the name of book research

36 the heritage

20

An exclusive extract from the new Parnell Heritage Journal, by author Graeme Bush

the councillors News from local ward councillors Desley Simpson (Ōrākei) and Mike Lee (Waitematā)

38 the magpie

24

Against her better judgement, The Magpie finds gifts for cats and dogs

the politicians Dancing David Seymour and Paul Goldsmith share their updates

40 the sound

25 the suburbanist Tommy Honey admits a crush on small house starchitecture

Andrew Dickens sounds out the reasoning behind New Zealand Music Month

41

26

the district diary

the plan Have we arrived at ‘peak Auckland,’ asks Hamish Firth?

What’s happening in June

27

42

the investment

the cryptic

Warren Couillault keeps a watchful eye on the world’s central banks

Our puzzle, by Māyā. Hint: some answers are local

28 the second act Leadership and the future of Elam's fine arts library are interwoven, says Sandy Burgham

A Bundle of Joy We have three copies of Dr Simon Rowley’s engaging, moving, witty memoir, Mind That Child to give away, courtesy of Penguin Books NZ. To win a copy, email business@thehobson.co.nz with “Doctor” in the subject line by 5pm, Friday June 22. Please include your mailing address so the book can be sent to you. The winning names will be picked at random.

The fine print: By entering this competition, you agree that your email details will be retained by The Hobson for our marketing database

the hobson 6

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issue 49, june 2018 Editor & Publisher Kirsty Cameron editor@thehobson.co.nz Art Direction & Production Stephen Penny design@thehobson.co.nz News Editor Mary Fitzgerald maryfitzgerald.thehobson@gmail.com Writers This Issue Graham Bush, Kirsty Cameron, Mary Fitzgerald, Stacy Gregg, Margaret Stone, Justine Williams

et’s start at the very beginning ... We have a very interesting piece leading our “The Village” pages this month. It’s a little-known local story about the Remuera connection with the singing von Trapp family. The piece came to us from Margie Stone, who is the nurse manager at the Baradene convent. Margie was talking with our The Second Act columnist, Sandy Burgham and they somehow got on to discussing musicals. A Sound of Music fan (like me), Margie shared her surprise discovery of the time the von Trapps stayed at Baradene. “That’s a Hobson story!” Sandy said as soon as she heard it, urging her to put pen to paper.

We’re so glad she did.

The von Trapp family singers toured NZ in 1955, four years before their fame grew beyond music circles with the staging of the musical, and in 1965, the movie. Of their NZ tour, there’s scant archival reference, which makes the Baradene connection even more interesting. Maria did give a fascinating interview to the then-Māori Affairs Department magazine, Te Ao Hou. The family spent much time with Māori cultural groups — Maria loved the waiata and poi especially, and said all New Zealanders should learn Māori “and be proud knowing it”. She was a strong and interesting woman — you can read the full interview on the National Library archive, teaohou.natlib.govt.nz Enjoy all this issue has to offer,

Sub-editor Fiona Wilson Columnists Sandy Burgham, Warren Couillault, Andrew Dickens, Hamish Firth, Paul Goldsmith, Mike Lee, Māyā, David Seymour, Desley Simpson

Kirsty Cameron editor@thehobson.co.nz 0275 326 424 Facebook: The Hobson magazine Instagram: TheHobson

Photographers Mary Fitzgerald, Stephen Penny Cover Icelandic horses — why Parnell writer Stacy Gregg visited Iceland. See The Journey, page 36. Photo courtesy of horsesoficeland.is

THE HOBSON is published 10 times a year by The Hobson Limited, PO Box 37490 Parnell, Auckland 1151. www.thehobson.co.nz F: TheHobsonMagazine I: @TheHobson Ideas, suggestions, advertising inquiries welcome. editor@thehobson.co.nz

Our cover stars are Icelandic horses, an indigenous breed and the reason Parnell author Stacy Gregg ventured to Iceland.

Read her tale, page 36

ISSUE 7 2018

THE HOBSON is Remuera, Parnell and Ōrākei’s community magazine. We deliver into letterboxes in these neighbourhoods, and copies are also at local libraries, cafes, and at businesses including the Vicky Ave and White Heron dairies, and Paper Plus Parnell. For more about us, see TheHobsonMagazine on Facebook.

The content of THE HOBSON is copyright. Our words, our pictures.

Don’t steal, and don’t borrow without checking with us first. We aim for accuracy but cannot be held liable for any inaccuracies that do occur. The views of our contributors are their own and not necessarily those of THE HOBSON. We don’t favour unsolicited contributions but do welcome you getting in touch via editor@thehobson.co.nz to discuss ideas.

The Hobson Ltd is a member of the Magazine Publishers Association This publication uses environmentally responsible papers

Since 1842, more than 150 local bodies have been abolished, merged and transformed within the area now covered by Auckland Council. On page 32, enjoy an exclusive extract from the new Parnell Heritage Journal about the Parnell Borough Council. You can buy the Journal from June 1 at Paper Plus Parnell and the White Heron Dairy

PARNELL BOROUGH COUNCIL

BOOKS FOR PARNELLITES JOHN ABBOTT AND THE ROYAL FOUNDATION FOR THE BLIND

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AND OTHER STORIES FROM PARNELL’S PAST

The Columnists

Left to right from top row: Sandy Burgham (The Second Act) is a brand strategist and an executive coach with a special interest in midlife change and transformational behaviours. She runs a central Auckland practice. www.playclc.com Remuera resident Warren Couillault (The Investment) is an executive director and the major shareholder of Hobson Wealth Partners, a private wealth advisory group. He is a shareholder and director of Generate Investment Management Ltd; and manager of a registered Kiwisaver scheme.

Andrew Dickens (The Sound) is the host of the afternoon show on Newstalk ZB. For 13 years he was the breakfast host on Classic Hits. He grew up in Remuera.

Hamish Firth (The Plan) lives and works in Parnell and is principal of the Mt Hobson Group, a specialist urban planning consultancy. www.mthobsonproperties.co.nz Mary Fitzgerald is The Hobson’s News Editor. A Mainlander who transplanted to Remuera 14 years ago, she is passionate about hearing and telling our stories.

Urban design critic Tommy Honey (The Suburbanist) is a former architect. The Remuera resident is a regular guest on RNZ National, discussing the built environment.

Judi Paape (The Teacher) is a parent, grandparent and highly-experienced teacher and junior school principal.

A Parnell resident, her column appears bi-monthly.

Contributing writer Wayne Thompson is a former The New Zealand Herald journalist, covering Auckland news. He has been a resident of Parnell for 34 years.

Contributing editor Justine Williams is an interiors stylist, writer and fashion editor. The Remuera resident has been the editor of Simply You and Simply You Living.

the hobson 10

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the village

Town & Around

Left, the only known photo of Maria von Trapp at Baradene, snapped on a box Brownie by pupil Rhys Hitchcock-Clark.

The school as it stood in the mid 1950s (Vicky Ave to the right) and above, the copy of Maria's memoir in the school archive, with a hand-decorated cover of cut-out images

WHEN THE VON TRAPPS CAME TO REMUERA Ōrākei resident Margaret Stone is the nurse manager at the convent within Baradene College of the Sacred Heart, working with the Sacred Heart nuns who live there in retirement. A chance remark led her to the little-known Remuera visit by the family whos estory inspired The Sound of Music.

At a Baradene College fundraiser quiz evening recently, there was a section entitled, “How well do you know your partner?” — always slightly dangerous ground.

One of the questions was “What is your partner’s favourite movie of all time?” That was an easy one for my husband to answer — The Sound of Music.

I’ve been a devoted fan since childhood — for years I couldn’t look at a set of curtains in anyone’s home without thinking how I could fashion them into play clothes for my future children. And although I’ve worked at Baradene for five years, it was more recently that I discovered the school’s connection to the singing von Trapp family, whose somewhat embroidered tale of escaping from Nazi-annexed Austria the hobson 13

inspired the Rodgers and Hammerstein stage musical, and the 1965 film.

One day in the convent, I remarked that I had just read that the last of the original seven von Trapp children had died. At which, one of the Sisters enquired the name. It was Maria Franziska von Trapp.

“Yes, she would have stayed here,” the Sister said. ”What do you mean, stayed here?”

“Oh yes. The von Trapp family stayed here at Baradene Convent.”

It is little known beyond the College community that Baroness Maria Augusta von Trapp, her stepdaughters Agathe (renamed Leisl in the musical, the writers reportedly changed the children’s names for privacy), Maria Franziska (Louisa) and Hedwig (Brigitta) stayed for around 10 days in May 1955. Werner (Kurt) and Johannes von Trapp and the family’s priest and musical director, Father Franz Wasner, were hosted at the St Francis Friary in Hillsborough.

The family, travelling as The Trapp Family Singers — they had dropped the von — had arrived in Auckland a part of a national tour, but the hotel booked for them was not up to scratch, the Sisters recall. Maria promptly called Bishop Liston, who in turn rang the convent, who gladly accommodated the travellers. Notes in the school archive record that the von Trapps sung masses and also performed a concert for their hosts.

It would be another four years before the Sound of Music hit the stage, and six years after that the film, starring Julie Andrews and Christopher Plummer, so in 1955, the wider world did not

the village

The signed title page of Maria von Trapp's memoir in the Baradene convent library. The signatures include Fr Wasner and other members of the travelling party, as well as the von Trapps

know their story well. Maria had published a memoir in 1949, The Story of the Trapp Family Singers, which had attracted interest, and they were well-respected in music circles.

The Baradene visit was decades ago, but the Sisters recalled that Maria was elegant, gracious — and formidable. “She gave us her autobiography,” chipped in another of the nuns, and within moments she returned from the convent library with Maria’s memoir, signed by Maria and all the von Trapp children. As Maria is believed to have signed very few copies of her book, it’s a rare and precious artifact.

Spoiler alerts that came with the book: Georg was not as handsome as Christopher Plummer and Maria was no Julie Andrews, and they didn’t actually climb over the mountains.

But aside from that, it’s still quite a story. Maria was a young, boisterous nun in the making and she was sent to help the widowed Baron von Trapp, a highly decorated submarine commander, with his children. He was engaged to a princess at the time, but well, the rest is history . . . as Maria writes. She fell in love with the children first.

After she and Georg married, they had two more children together while in Austria.

Three things led them to have to escape quickly after the Nazi annexation of Austria. Georg had turned down an offer to head up the submarine division of the German navy. The eldest child, Rupert (renamed Friedrich in the film and demoted to second-eldest) was a medical student, whom the Germans wanted to work for them.

The final straw was that they were invited to sing for Hitler at his birthday celebrations. The family decided they could not compromise their

principles, but Georg knew that a third refusal to the Nazi hierarchy would put them in real danger. So they said yes to the upcoming birthday, then used the ruse of going to Italy on a weekend hiking trip. From there they fled to London: Maria, Georg, nine children and Father Wasner. They were penniless, spoke no English, were dressed only in their hiking clothes and Maria was pregnant with their youngest child, Johannes.

From London, they organised a singing contract in the United States, and so in 1938 arrived in New York. They spent the next seven years touring the US. They experienced great financial hardship. Georg struggled especially, but Maria was 20 years younger than he and the driving force for their assimilation, embracing all that was good about America.

Another difference to their stage and screen portrayal was that their repertoire was more highbrow — Mozart, Haydn Bach, not at all as depicted in the movie.

Their audience on the whole comprised educated, affluent people and some generous benefactors came to their aid, teaching them English, and one couple providing a house in return for private concerts. They did learn that they had to incorporate some folk songs and yodelling to attract a wider audience.

By 1942 the family had enough money to buy land in Stowe, Vermont, a mountainous area that reminded them of Austria. They kept touring, used their home as a musical retreat, and in 1947, began to operate it as a ski lodge. Money remained tight, as Maria wrote. The requisitioned von Trapp mansion in Salzberg was returned to them post-war, sold and the funds used to pay off the property in Vermont. The lodge remains in the family, today run by Johannes’s son, Sam. While their tour of NZ was brief, there are echoes of it today. The family called their Stowe home “Cor Unum,” which means One Heart — the Baradene College motto.

To quote Johannes Von Trapp’s take on the movie: “The Sound Of Music simplified everything. I think perhaps reality is at the same time less glamorous but more interesting than the myth.” I tend to agree. p Images courtesy of Baradene

GETTING PETS ONBOARD

A motion by councillor Cathy Casey to allow pets on public transport received a boost from a four-legged friend of the Ōrākei Local Board. Board member Toni Millar took her rescue dog, Toby (above, with Millar) to Auckland Council’s planning committee meeting last month, to support Casey’s notice of motion to allow people to carry controlled and/or contained pets on public transport.

Presently, Toby’s local travel options are limited to Millar’s car and the Waiheke ferry, but Casey’s motion would open up trains and buses to well-behaved pets (like Molly, patiently waiting at Ōrākei station). The motion was unanimously supported by councillors, subject to having a consistent policy including appropriate health and safety guidelines. Auckland Transport will complete a review of guidelines from next month.

Casey says having a public transport option available to pet owners is a major the hobson 14

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the village

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The SPCA also presented at the meeting, supporting the move.

SPCA scientific officer, Dr Sarah Zito, said the SPCA believes there are many benefits for people and animals in public transport becoming pet friendly. “Allowing companion animals on public transport has the potential to discourage car trips related to needing to transport animals, and may normalise public transport use in our car dependent city”, she told the meeting.

While there are many pluses for pet owners for public transport becoming pet friendly, there are concerns too. “These include hygiene, safety and nuisance issues but these can all be managed by responsible pet owners,” said Zito. — Mary Fitzgerald p

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Congratulations to Greta Bennett, who has been selected as the recipient of the 2018 Sir Douglas Myers Scholarship to study at Cambridge University. The late Sir Douglas Myers set up the scholarship 18 years ago to enable brilliant NZ students to attend Myer’s alma mater, Cambridge’s Gonville and Caius College, with the hope that they return home to become leaders in their chosen field. The hotly-contested $60,000 a year scholarship covers university fees and living costs for three years of undergraduate study.

Bennett will study economics at Cambridge. “Economics will equip me to work in successful and challenging corporations in my future career,” she says. “It will also assist in my ultimate aim to establish and run a profitable social enterprise.”

Co-dux of St Cuth’s last year, Bennett topped the school in history, physics and statistics, and completed a calculus paper at the University of Auckland while in Year 13. In Year 12, she was first in English, Spanish and History. A College prefect, she also lead the school’s Reserve Bank team in the National Monetary Policy Challenge. p

ACG CREATES A NEW SENIOR CAMPUS A new school is to be created in Newmarket, with the announcement that ACG Parnell College will take over the vacated Māori Television studios in Davis Cres to create a new senior students’ campus.

The new university-campus style facility for Year 12 and 13 students will be open in time for the 2019 academic year, and its roll will include pupils transferring from ACG Senior College in Lorne St.

Initially established as Senior College in the city and Junior College in Parnell, the ACG group’s Parnell campuses include the secondary school opposite the Domain on Titoki St, and a primary school on George St. Growing demand for the personalised learning and academic excellence ACG schools offer was the catalyst for change, says ACG Group CEO of Schools and Early Learning, Clarence van der Wel. “We are confident the two respected colleges will be stronger together, continuing their focus on academic excellence. Drawing on their historical strengths, they will offer a wider combined range of opportunities and extra-curricular activities to students and staff.”

The new campus will offer both the International Baccalaureate (IB) and Cambridge International Examinations (CIE).

“This means, for the first time, ACG Parnell College students will also be offered the choice to undertake either the IB Diploma, or its existing Cambridge programme, ensuring they enrol in a qualification that is the right fit for them. No other school in the country has both qualification pathways on offer,” says van der Wel. Renovations to the Davis Cres building include retaining the Māori TV studio, which will become a theatre for drama and theatre arts, as well as music. Most Year 12 and 13 classes will be taught at the Senior Campus.

A spokesperson for ACG said the future of its Lorne St building was under review. p

recreational area to the left of the gate five entrance on Shore Rd. Saint Kentigern Girls’ School will have its own distinct presence and entrance. The boys will get 10 new classrooms, new recreational spaces and refurbishment of some existing classrooms.

A new specialist arts, science and technology block will be built and available to both primary schools, on separate timetables.

Also part of the plan is the construction of a new preschool on the Shore Rd campus.

The Board is considering the future of the current site of Saint Kentigern Girls’ School, which sits on 1.24ha on the corner of Remuera and Ranui roads. Formerly the Corran School for girls, it was acquired by the Trust Board in 2009, initially named Saint Kentigern School for Girls—Corran. Saint Kentigern schools also include its middle school and college at Pakuranga.

— Mary Fitzgerald p

AROUND THE VILLAGE Visiting the summit of Maungakiekei One Tree Hill is a different experience from this month. Under the management of the Tūpuna Maunga Authority, the summit is now permanently closed to all motor vehicles, including cars, motorbikes and scooters.

Parking is available near the summit road entrance and access through to Cornwall Park remains unchanged. Vehicle access will be continued for people with limited mobility; they or their drivers can obtain an access code for the gate for the day of their visit by calling the Council contact centre on ( 09 ) 301 0101.

ALL SAINTS ON SHORE The Saint Kentigern Trust Board has confirmed its revised masterplan decision for the group’s two Remuera primary schools and preschool, with the announcement it will build a new girls’ school and preschool on its Shore Rd campus, alongside the boys’ school.

Trust Board chair, Dr John Kernohan, says that the Board is confident that the decision is a superior outcome to what it had originally proposed last year, prior to consultation with the schools’ community, many of whom raised concern at the lack of consultation before the Board’s long-term plan was announced.

The revised plan now includes a new purpose-built 19 classroom girls’ school, along with a new learning commons, library and

The Parnell Baths are closed until November for refurbishment work, but because some of the work presents a public safety risk, the walkway from Judges Bay to the Pt Resolution bridge through the baths complex has been closed as well. Two alternative access routes are available, via Pt Resolution at the end of St Stephens Ave, linking Judges Bay and Tamaki Dr, and the second, which is steeper and less well-lit, passing through St Stephens Chapel and cemetery, joining up with Judge St to St Stephens Ave and Point Resolution Bridge).

The Ōrākei Local Board had allocated $30,000 towards the development of plans for a walkway connection between Wilson’s Beach and Shore Rd Reserve, Remuera. Auckland Council’s

the hobson 17

the village

Community Facilities has advised the Board that Community Facilities will complete and fund the project, and the final cost to the Board will be approximately $18,000. The remaining allocation will be available to the Board to spend elsewhere.

The Ōrākei Local Board has received its first 100 per cent score in an audit of the parks and reserves in the ward, under the new contractor Ventia. The audit is central to the Board’s initiative in reviewing maintenance standards, following Ventia’s poor performance when it was awarded the contracts.

Meet Your Reps

H

alfway through its three-year term, the Ōrākei Local Board has rotated its leadership, with deputy chair Kit Parkinson (above, right) now moving into the chair’s role and Carmel Claridge (above) stepping up as deputy. The first chair, Colin Davis, remains on the board. A first term member who holds the transport and environment portfolios, Claridge lives in St Johns Park. As she told Mary Fitzgerald, Claridge was a family law and civil litigation solicitor, ran a personal training business while her children were young, and worked for several years for the advocacy group, Auckland Ratepayers Alliance. She’s been involved in schools, sports clubs, and community groups within the Ōrākei ward, is chair of the Friends of Pourewa Valley, a committee member of the Meadowbank and St Johns Residents Association, and a member of Friends of Waiatarua Reserve.

Why did you stand for this role?

Now, more than ever, effective governance and strong advocacy is needed to ensure Orākei ward residents get a fair deal for the amount of rates they contribute.

I believe very strongly in the fundamental principles of democracy – particularly that only those elected and accountable should be entitled to make binding governance decisions on behalf of others. The slow erosion of that concept at local government level has concerned me for many years.

The development of the Shore Rd fields’ new car park is progressing, with the new pathway forming and new curbing down.

The Akarana Marine Sports Trust has met with the new Ōrākei Local Board chair, Kit Parkinson, to introduce an optional plan for the development and use of The Landing at Okahu Bay on Tamaki Dr. The proposal is now under consideration with the Board.

- Around the Village reporting by Mary Fitzgerald p

Since being elected, what do you consider to be the top two things you have achieved?

1. Promoting and seeing the adoption of the Gowing Dr underpass project as the key local board initiative.

2. Working with local community to ensure AT’s extension of a bus route to Meadowbank Train Station and supporting bus stop additions.

What top four things do you intend to achieve in the time remaining in your role and why are they important to you?

1. Expansion of the Eastern Songbird project across the ward. With traps in one in five private properties and intensive weed and pest eradication in Council parks, we can make a real difference in eliminating problematic fauna and flora.

2. Convincing Council to adopt the Gowing Dr underpass in the 10-year budget. Governing body funding is necessary to see this project to fruition.

The link will provide a safe walking and cycling route to schools, and potentially take 3000 Monday to Friday vehicle user trips off the busy arterial St Johns and Kepa roads.

3. Liston Park Private/Public Partnership Redevelopment. The grounds and facilities at Liston Park need upgrading to provide much needed additional sporting facilities for our communities.

4. Waiatarua Reserve Management Plan refresh/redevelopment. The current management plan for this unique and ecologically significant wetlands area is out of date. A refresh is needed, along with a plan to ensure adequate maintenance and preservation of this amenity as a vital stormwater catchment, habitat for biodiversity, and recreational area.

Tell us something about yourself that will surprise your community.

Twice a week I work at a local dog groomer, a complete change from working behind computer screens, poring over documents, and processing emails!

It’s physically quite demanding work, but being a dog lover, it’s like pet therapy and a gym workout all rolled into one.

If you were PM, what would you do to improve Auckland?

Investigate mechanisms to ensure future Council-imposed, targeted rates on households were flat rates, as opposed to being assessed according to the capital valuation of property. In conjunction with Council, I’d also invest in significant improvements to Tamaki Dr. It’s not only an iconic city amenity, it’s a route of national significance attracting many thousands of visitors.

What is your favourite escape in Auckland?

In winter, getting rugged up and getting a healthy blast of fresh air on Kohimarama beach. In summer, I like to head to one of our nearby tracts of native bush.

Tell us a little about your family.

I live with my partner Bruce, a fine fellow of Ngāti Raukawa descent. We cohabit with Toddy the rescue cat, Sam the Bichon and HoneyPuff the Löwchen. My three children, Ben, Madeleine and James Cockram, are independent young adults. I am immensely proud of them. the hobson 18

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the councillors

DESLEY SIMPSON

I

want to say a special THANK YOU to those who took the time to respond and give me your thoughts on the draft Auckland Council budget for 2018-28 (also known as the Long-Term Plan, or LTP). Consultation took place over March, with Council receiving nearly 26,000 submissions in writing, from drop-in sessions and from many public “Have Your Say”events. Thanks must also go to our local residents’ groups like the Remuera Residents Association, who took up my offer to provide indepth information and hosted special meetings to encourage participation. I have always promised my vote will reflect your feedback, and at time of writing that feedback is being analysed.

Written feedback on the main budget questions from the 10 suburbs making up the Ōrākei ward showed: Most responders were willing to pay an additional rate to accelerate water quality initiatives to reduce wastewater overflows Most were willing to pay an additional rate to fund initiatives to help preserve and enhance our natural environment Most were supportive of a general rate rise of 2.5 per cent for the first two years of the LTP, and 3.5 per cent thereafter Most were supportive of making changes to the Accommodation Providers Targeted Rate to include online accommodation providers On the implementation of a regional fuel tax, again, most respondents were supportive. Interestingly, central government waited for Council’s consultation to close before they announced that they were also considering increases to their fuel excise tax of between nine and 12 cents per litre over the next three years. This means that the combined increase would not just be 10c plus GST, but pretty much double that to 22-25c, including GST. I personally found the timing very disappointing. The Government knew of the mayor’s intention to look at extra charges for fuel for some

• • • •

time. So, to be fair, Council reacted by going back to residents and ratepayers to ask if they still supported a fuel tax knowing all the financial facts, along with the projects that would be funded by the tax which weren’t known during that original consultation either.

By the time you read this, those results will be known. Rest assured my promise doesn’t falter and I will vote on the proposed regional fuel tax as per your feedback and sentiments.

One particular long-term problem our area has had, and which has been a concern to me, is poor water quality in our local bays.

A significant contributing factor has been our older suburbs’ aged below-the-ground infrastructure, which has allowed overflows directly into the water. The good news is, I now have not just a solution, but an action plan in progress. In December, Council’s Healthy Waters team began a project to separate the combined stormwater and wastewater systems in the Ōrākei suburban area.

This work will reduce the overflows into Okahu Bay. In the five months since, 792 private property drainage inspections have been undertaken, to determine whether stormwater and wastewater drainage systems were separated. The mapping Council held was very old, and we were uncertain as to accuracy. Unsurprisingly, the number of private properties in Ōrākei still with combined stormwater and wastewater drainage systems was well higher than anticipated. Design consultants are now working on the separation works, and this is expected to take until the end of the year. I must say I am excited that this Council is finally beginning a process that will deliver quality stormwater and wastewater infrastructure to address not just the intensification needs for today and for the future, but that improves the bays that are being used more and more for recreation.

In last month’s column, I wrote of concerns I had about Vector’s response during the storms in April, which saw many homes without power for days. Vector has responded by saying that the scale of what they were dealing with was massive – at one point around 180,000 customers were without power and/or hot water.

Vector told me they accept and understand the frustrations many of you had with communicating with them during that time – and for that, they are sorry. The company is now reviewing its processes. They have begun work on an improved Vector Outage app, that will be able to function better during a major outage.

Desley Simpson is the Councillor for Auckland representing the Ōrākei ward

MIKE LEE

I

was surprised as most people when Transport Minister Phil Twyford announced that the NZ Superannuation Fund had offered to build, own and operate the Minister’s favoured light rail project – costed at $6bn for two lines. As we know, one of these will link Auckland International Airport with the CBD via Dominion Rd and the other will service the Minister’s Te Atatu electorate, eventually extending to Kumeu. I’m not sure where that leaves the rationale for the double-whammy fuel taxes but I guess they will be imposed regardless.

One can only conclude that the Super Fund’s willingness to invest in a public-private partnership (PPP) for this project means PPPs are as lucrative as their critics have long been saying —that is, from the ‘private’ partner’s perspective. And it’s that role ironically, that the Crown-owned Super Fund is evidently planning for itself.

‘Privatise the profit – socialise the losses’. On the other hand, that profit must come at the expense of the ‘public’ partner – that’s us, the taxpayers, ratepayers, motorists and future fare-paying passengers. In other words, the losses will be borne by the people of Auckland and New Zealand. Silly me. I thought we were meant to be the beneficiaries of the NZ Superannuation Fund – not its fall guys.

I trust the government gets good advice on this scheme because when it comes to choice of rail mode to Auckland airport, it clearly doesn’t have good advice at all. Opting for the widely criticised light rail (trams) option instead of heavy rail (trains) to the airport is a very high-risk call, taken on the basis of dubious technical advice, and without a business case. It also goes against international best practice.

Bringing in the NZ Super Fund to fund and build it would mean the government doubling down on a deeply-flawed strategy.

Leaving to one side the $3bn tramline to Te Atatu, let’s look again

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at the pros and cons of light rail to the airport. To be fair, light rail has the benefit of being a versatile and efficient form of public transport. Modern trams can service busy city streets like buses (‘street car’ mode), but can carry many more people (11,000 per hour) and in greater comfort than diesel buses (2500 per hour).

Trams are great people movers, based on frequent stops, ideally spaced at 350m to 800m apart. But electric trains (EMUs) carry even more people (48,000 per hour) and go much faster. This is not just due to the superior power of EMUs, but in contrast to trams, train stations tend to be spaced between one to three kilometres apart. The latest plan I have seen for a heavy rail connection from the airport via Puhinui to the CBD (costed at $750m) has it stopping at only two stations, but will enable cross platform connections to the rest of the suburban network, from Henderson to Pukekohe. In contrast, the 22.8km airport-Dominion Rd-CBD tramline will have 18 stops (from Britomart). It will be at best 15 minutes slower than the train.

Trams on Dominion Rd, once the enormous cost and disruption from construction is completed, I concede, will be great for people and businesses in the Dominion Rd area. But what about the rest of Auckland? From the passenger’s point of view (overlooked as always), weary international travellers, with their baggage, straphanging, through multiple tram stops to reach their central city hotels on a crowded tram would not be an ideal prospect. Even less so in the case of travellers going the other way, anxious to get to the airport on time to make their flights.

When I visited Queensland’s Gold Coast to inspect its brand new tramline, the managers emphasised to me one of their key ‘learnings’— light rail means ‘mass transit’, not ‘rapid transit’. It’s an important point and one that both Minister Phil Twyford and Mayor Phil Goff obviously still do not understand.

So the key question — one that those quintessential politicians have overlooked in pushing their trophy project — is will a slow tram journey between the CBD and airport provide meaningful competition to the private car? Because it is for this very reason, based on speed, capacity and predictability of journey time, that Melbourne, which has the biggest and most sophisticated light rail system in the world, will not be using trams for its airport connection, but trains.

Mike Lee is the Councillor for Auckland representing the Waitematā and Gulf ward

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the politicians

DAVID SEYMOUR

S

PAUL GOLDSMITH

eymour, my first mayoralty is buried under Hobson Bay,” said Banksie. It is true, the Eastern Motorway, a motorway across Hobson Bay, came to dominate local body politics in the early years of this century and no doubt hurt John Banks’ prospects of re-election in 2004. Why raise this? I have not lost my mind: I’m not proposing to build a motorway across Hobson Bay. We do need to face facts though. This city is attracting 800 new cars per week and the resulting congestion is worse than ever.

It is costing people a fortune in time and money. You might sit on the Shore Rd-Ayr St parking lot twice a day. You might be waiting for a tradesman to get across town from a previous job. You might have children with after-school interests, evenly distributed around traffic hotspots. In all these cases, you are bearing the costs of lost productivity due to undercooked transport infrastructure.

I’ve been reading about the history of our motorway network as it was planned and as it is now. The status quo is that everyone meets in a ‘T’ at Spaghetti Junction, before they can go north, south, or west. East? Well you have to drive down the Southern Motorway for 10 km, then turn left onto a highway.

The original 1950s plan was more comprehensive. It recognised that most people don’t want to go to the CBD, they wish to go around it. The South Western Motorway connecting Waterview to the airport is part of this plan, as was a second harbour crossing west of the CBD, and a motorway from the CBD to the east. All in all, it created a ring road around the city, instead of a daily disaster in the centre of it.

Long story short, Muldoon did not want to build it, and we’ve all been waiting ever since. We in the Hobson area are now the daily victims of these roads’ absence, and nothing that the current Government is proposing will do anything about it (the airport tram will either take over an hour to get there, or be so fast that the space it occupies on Dominion Rd will be exclusively for its use).

Here is an observation. If a new motorway can be undergrounded in a 3.5km tunnel in order to preserve the amenity value of Mt Albert, then undergrounding a motorway to preserve Hobson Bay, Parnell, and Remuera must be a bargain. Here’s another thought: let’s underground the railway across Hobson Bay too. Since moving to the area over 20 years ago, I have always been puzzled that Hobson Bay is not a bay in the way we normally conceive of them. The problem is the rail causeway that makes it more lake than bay. Remuera could be a beachfront suburb.

Here is a prediction: no matter who is in government and no matter who represents our community, there will be a corridor connecting the east with the centre, north and west. It will be underground, under Remuera. It will happen within a generation.

This month ACT will contest the by-election in Northcote, another area frustrated with transport infrastructure. Our candidate is campaigning on a simple promise: to enter Parliament and table a bill requiring the government to complete the original motorway network within a decade. That is the kind of action we deserve if we are to fix Auckland’s transport frustration.

David Seymour is the MP for Epsom.

M

any of us were concerned to hear reports of sewage in the walls at Middlemore Hospital. The Prime Minister and ministers leapt on the story as evidence of neglect and under-investment in the health sector after nine years of a National government. It took a while for the truth to come out, from the Health Board itself. Despite the “dramatic language”, it said, the situation was more mundane. “There was no sewage spilling into the building, just some staining on the ground within the soil stack duct. To clean it up, engineering had to mix water on it, so the quantity was less than a bucket,” the DHB said in a statement.

Our big hospitals are colossal enterprises and there are some buildings in need of repair. The government recently signed off on an additional $11.5 million for repairs to Middlemore’s Scott Building, taking the total for the project to rectify such defects to $27.5m. This is a drop in the bucket from a multi-billion dollar annual health budget. Meantime, Middlemore continues to operate with its huge staff doing their best every day to serve those in need.

The story was so prominent because it is critical to the ArdernPeters Government’s narrative. The line is, that they have inherited such a mess that only huge sums of spending will remedy the problem. The reality is very different. As we all know, this is a country and Auckland is a city that is doing very well. It’s a place that we’re all proud to call home, where jobs are plentiful and where we’ve made great progress on many of the challenges.

Of course, recent rapid growth has put pressure on our infrastructure and our services. But we have the resources to tackle those challenges. Treasury’s Economic and Fiscal Update in December showed the new government inherited a projected $23.1 billion in surpluses over the next four years. It also showed they planned additional borrowing of $10 billion in the next three years.

The Crown financial statements for February revealed an additional $494 million in tax revenue, because of the strong economy.

So the government is awash with cash. Your cash. But the point is, because of the economy’s strength and the previous government’s good management, there are plenty of resources to deal with the challenges ahead. The thing the PM needs to explain is, why then does her government need even more taxes – such as the 25 cents a litre fuel tax for Auckland – and why, with all this money, can they not keep their promises, such as their commitment to reduce the cost of GP visits by $10 on July 1?

The answer is because of poor quality choices in many areas.

Spending $2.8 billion giving students a year of free education that has brought in scarcely an extra student. Why? Borrowing money, interest-free, to invest in your tertiary education has never been a barrier for the vast majority. Similarly, nobody believes Shane Jones won’t waste hundreds of millions in his frenzy to shovel his Provincial Growth Fund money out the door as fast as possible.

Each government eventually has to account for their decisions.

We’ll support them when asked to work toward shared goals, but we won’t let them get away with the calumny that they have been left a shambles.

Paul Goldsmith is a National list MP, based in Epsom.

the hobson 24

the suburbanist

Starstruck by Starchitecture

L

overs of portmanteau words need no explanation of the term ‘starchitect’ – the moniker applied to those architects whose fame precedes them. Elevated to celebrity status among their peers, occasionally even the general public comes to know who they are.

When starchitecture goes stratospheric, this is known as the “Bilbao effect”, named for when a work of architecture so transcends its desultory surroundings that it drags a whole city along on the coattails of its brilliance.

Usually starchitects – Frank Gehry, Zaha Hadid, Sir David Adjaye – need a huge site, a significant commission or at the very least, an astronomical budget, to break out of the (superbly designed, naturally) echo chamber of the architectural community and earn wider public attention. Building a small house in your backyard just won’t cut it.

Until now that is. And it took a couple of entrepreneurs with a background in fashion and marketing, Philip Bueno de Mesquita and Paul Tully, to do it. Where there’s money there’s a way. Londoners de Mesquita and Tully are the founders of Cube Haus, an idea they say will “disrupt the housing market”. Good luck to them I say.

They intend to build high-design homes at reasonable prices with a range of off-the-peg, modular designs by well-known architects – ‘starchitects’ like David Adjaye, Skene Catling de la Peña, Carl Turner Architects and Faye Toogood.

They have commissioned a range of designs that can be adapted to fit on difficult infill sites or in backyards. They intend to work with CLT (cross-laminated timber) panels built off-site, a typical prefab solution.

Cube Haus realised early that access to land would be difficult and their solution was to set up as land agents and establish a company called Land Converter, describing themselves as “specialists in buying and developing unused and awkward spaces”.

The landowner sells off part of their backyard but gets to have a say in which design is built. Land Converter finds the

purchaser and removes the friction of commissioning architects and getting planning approval.

Cube Haus delivers the range of designs and manages the procurement and delivery of the off-site built house.

They estimate that through lower margins and the use of offsite construction their houses will be 10-15 per cent cheaper than an equivalent alternative. However, their three-bedroom house is estimated to cost between £650,000 and £750,000 (NZ$1.25m- $1.45m); it is unclear whether this is the build cost or includes the land. If you want to sell off the end of your garden, an awkward garage, or even a bit of your roof, they’ll scope out the site, apply for planning permission and give you 25-30 per cent of the end value if successful.

While it could be said that the Cube Haus solution is innovative, it is not disruptive. They are simply intermediaries in an existing market. The housing solution offered by Cube Haus is well-designed and attractive – hence desirable – but positioned at the middle of the market, it is barely affordable and, with only two projects commissioned, it has minimal reach.

But you don’t need much ‘traction’ to get attention. Say what you will about the idea – and, apart from the price point, a confession, I love it – they have a great PR machine.

Before their website was live, they had articles in The Guardian, Architectural Digest, The Architects Journal and a dozen or more online design websites including Wallpaper*, Dezeen, ArchDaily and Curbed. Because there would be no starchitects without their enablers, the media (including, now, me). And the media wouldn’t write it if you didn’t want it. So, we have your addiction to design porn to thank.

We – the media, starchitects, architects, house-builders, prefab companies and disruptors – thank you from the bottoms of our wallets. — Tommy Honey Above: Concepts by Adjaye Associates for Cube Haus. cube-haus.co.uk

the hobson 25

the plan

The Bike Path to a Better City?

T

he ideological change in Government policy is now starting to be felt in transport funding allocation. In short, less money will be allocated to new highways and roading projects and more on public transport, cycling and walking.

Regardless of the proposed changes in the allocation of funds or a change in mindset, congestion will get worse in Auckland, not better. The recently released high level Government transport policy will not result in any concrete congestion-reducing initiatives, that is, things that can be measured.

And any thoughts of the Warkworth to Whangarei highway and the Auckland dedicated East-West link are now dead in the water. While these two upgrades would have benefitted the movement of goods the most, there would have been significant road safety improvements and a localised reduction in congestion through the industrial areas of Mt Wellington and Penrose.

A new $28 billion, 10-year transport programme has been announced for Auckland. This will be in part funded by the proposed 25c additional fuel tax – made up of 10c from a regional fuel tax, 10c from a nationwide fuel tax, and GST. In short, your petrol will go up by around 10 to 12 per cent each time you fill up. It will further be funded by an increase in development contributions, and I suspect, in time congestion charges may be introduced to raise further revenue. It is dubious that they actually reduce congestion but that is a story for another day.

Public transport, walking and cycling are going to see big boosts in funding. A busway is proposed from Panmure to Botany, electric trains will run to Pukekohe and the Northern busway will be extended to Albany. There is also a goal to provide more public transport services, to every 15 minutes.

And it case you missed it, the plan is also to run a tram down Dominion Rd to the airport. This is in spite of

Councillor Mike Lee’s comments around cost savings and buildability and the alternative option for public transport to the airport being a heavy rail connection from the existing station at Puhinui. $900m is proposed to go into cycling and walking. Skyway, the cycleway that will be slung on the side of the Harbour Bridge, is now being funded. Red light cameras will also be increased, in fact I hear there is a trial coming to the Ayr St/ Parnell Rd intersection to hopefully reduce those red light runners, or increase revenue.

So we pay more, we get fewer roads, we have more buses, and yet congestion will stay the same.

I am starting to wonder if all this growth is worth it. To have this “good life”, the best city in the world, a city great for walking and cycling and buses every 15 minutes, we need to grow. Common sense should be screaming at every citizen and leader that the more we chase a bigger better place to live, the more the stress on us as people in mind, body and spirit grows – not to mention the stress on the infrastructure that can barely keep up with our needs, let alone an immense sea of at times unwanted newcomers. Auckland Council releases more land for more houses and then announces an increase in development contributions as the areas lack services. This is unsustainable and in its most basic form is robbing Peter to pay Paul.

Maybe if we said Auckland is full, let’s improve what we have, let’s accept the issues and the daily grind as being OK, as the alternative march of growth is not going to give any of us a greater quality of life when all things are measured.

If we want growth, enable Whangarei or Tauranga to grow to 250,000 people, or open up Thames or maybe even a new city away from Auckland. I am not trying to be a NIBMY, but more growth and getting bigger must have an upside, not just in the headcount.

— Hamish Firth

the hobson 26

the investment

The Contagion

T

here’s been a few wobbles in financial markets so far this year following the dream run, especially in US stocks, since Donald Trump was elected US President back in November 2016. The wobbles have got me thinking again about credit, interest rates, asset prices and the backdrop to the Great Financial Crisis in 2007/8. Are markets prepared at the minute for the inevitable next outbreak of contagion, where everything goes bad everywhere?

One could simply observe that money has been so easy to access and abundant now for so long— and at such ridiculously low prices — that as was the case last time, things will not end well. And if we compared the quantum of credit creation leading up to the GFC with credit creation since, one might also conclude that this imminent correction will take an even greater toll than the last.

Looking back to the GFC helps us understand what might be coming around the corner in the not-too-distant future. The US Federal Reserve, as well as other central banks, maintained very accommodative monetary policy in the wake of the “tech wreck” and the 2001 recession. Politicians loved it, as super low interest rates made for increasingly happy homeowners, and therefore compliant voters. This did not end well as, like always, when interest rates are held low for too long, poor practice creeps in and then takes over in the credit markets. Asset prices bubble and, especially in US residential real estate, sometimes swell. And when distortions such as this are ignored and risk awareness goes out the window, bubbles burst, and we see great contagion: on the brink of collapse back in 2007, the financial system threatened to bring down the global economy, the epitome of global financial market contagion.

Last year, the then-chair of the Federal Reserve, Janet Yellen, stated that she did not think we would see another financial crisis in our lifetimes. I’m no central banker, but, pardon me? Sure, the global banking system looks to be much stronger than it was back in 2007, but surely such a statement is dangerously misleading.

The facts are that debt has been amassed in the years since the worst of the GFC has passed. The credit crisis that began with seemingly preposterous global debt of $140 trillion, has been dealt with by adding another $70 trillion. Nice.

The bulk of this debt increase has occurred in the capital markets and on central bank balance sheets. Surely then, the next trigger for a global financial crisis will be from wobbles in one of these sources. And it appears to me that — evident in Yellen’s comments above — lackadaisical central bankers foolishly believe they have beat the business cycle into submission. Will the central banks themselves this time round be the source of contagion? The biggest risk to the economy and the financial markets is therefore the reversal of this balance sheet expansion, and the normalising of interest rates as monetary policy settings swing back from emergency to accommodative to regular.

In the mid-2000s, we had an easy-money driven credit bubble, where rates were too low for too long. That bubble manifested itself mostly in housing and that was reasonably easily identifiable.

It might look as if today’s bubble is in central bank balance sheets, and the massive monetary inflation that’s created massive liquidity which has almost certainly spilled into just about every asset class.

Maybe not surprisingly, markets have so far been rather resilient in the face of the early stages of monetary policy adjustment, notwithstanding the wobbles we’ve seen so far this year. But keep an eye on bond markets for signs of real trouble and potential contagion. And keep an eye on those central bankers!

— Warren Couillault

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the second act

Time's Up

I

may have been the only one scribbling notes while listening to — namedrop alert — President Obama at that fancy schmancy dinner recently. While his observations on leadership were insightful, the one that has stuck with me is about when to give up power, when to stand aside to let younger, more relevant voices come through. It’s time for baby boomer bureaucrats to take seriously the gap between themselves and those younger generations who will inherit the mess they have created. Despite an admirable social conscience and a global awareness, these digital natives, Obama observed, are so frustrated and alienated by the system that they are showing a loathing to join it, preferring instead to “tend to their own small gardens”. We must, he implored, find a way to pull them into public discourse.

So I am in full support of a growing body of students and staff at the University of Auckland who are challenging management who wish to close three specialist libraries — Fine Art, Architecture and Planning, Music and Dance — without a proper consultation process. While the bureaucrats have backtracked and scrambled to declare, somewhat feebly, that they are listening, the review panel lacked adequate student representation and voice.

As a part-time student, I attended a post-closure announcement korero between key architects of the proposed restructure and a lecture theatre full of Fine Arts faculty students and others. What ensued was an example of why young people are so uninspired by the leadership that’s either asleep at the wheel, or out of touch with the needs of their young student body.

These members of the establishment seemed embarrassingly inept in defending what has become a controversial review which seemed to ignore its own research findings, such as that art and design students search for information differently from those in other disciplines; the needs of artists are “extremely idiosyncratic“ and “for most information needs, browsing [in libraries] is the strongly preferred behaviour”. (Gosh, sounds like they need a specialist Fine Arts library!).

They were caught off-guard by the passionate and articulate students who see specialist libraries as the hub of their community and learning experience. The flawed review process is a prime example of what London School of Economics Professor David

Graeber calls the “bullshitization of academic life” where “strategic mission statements” and “audits and monitoring” are more talked about than teaching and education. No doubt some bureaucrats needed to achieve spreadsheet KPIs and closing three specialist libraries is an easy answer. One would think the review committee would have considered “stakeholder engagement” (in plainspeak – talking and listening to students). Um, no, not really, it appears.

Students were angry, but out of it has bubbled up a good, old-fashioned, student movement. You can browse savethefineartslibary.com to read the offending documents, and put in a submission along with many of our leading gallerists, curators and artists. You might want to join a rally. Remember those? The atmosphere on a recent one was electric; over 1000 students, teachers and supporters marched, chanting “When arts and culture are under attack, stand up, fight back”.

Spurred on, I read the university’s strategic plan, where I found broad-brush declarations such as “working to advance the intellectual, cultural, environmental, economic and social wellbeing of the peoples of Auckland and New Zealand” and “providing high quality management marked by open, transparent, responsive, and accountable academic and administrative policies, practices and service”. Hmm, the process and recommendations around the libraries seem to work against both.

I am hoping the powers-that-be realise that the tide is turning, as evidenced by our pregnant, unmarried PM, who not only has championed free tertiary education, but has also chosen to be Minister of Arts, Culture and Heritage. The dissonance between a new generation of leaders and the baby boomers in power — who benefitted from specialist libraries when they were at university — has never been more evident. Their only hope in order to remain relevant is to listen. The fight is not about where to put a growing number of books — one rationale for the mergers — it is about something far more important.

He aha te mea nui o te ao What is the most important thing in the world?

He tangata, he tangata, he tangata It is the people, it is the people, it is the people — Sandy Burgham

Yes, even Mahé needs a navigator.

J U S T N O T O N T H E W AT E R

GUIDING, GROWING, AND P R O T E C T I N G YO U R W E A LT H

H O B S O N W E A LT H .C O. N Z | 0 8 0 0 74 2 7 3 7 Hobson Wealth Partners Limited (FSP29782), is an NZX Advising Firm. The disclosure statement for Hobson Wealth Partners is available upon request, free of charge.

the doctor

A Good Hard Stare Simon Rowley knows babies. A senior consultant neonatologist at Auckland City Hospital, he teaches at Starship, had a paediatric private practice in Remuera for 30 years, and was a visiting paediatrician for Plunket. With wife Ann, he’s also swaddled, burped and raised four babies of his own to adulthood. In this extract from his new memoir, Mind That Child, Dr Rowley writes of guerilla gardening, the importance of silly faces, and the engaging behavior of newborns

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y home is in the eastern shadow of Maungawhau/ Mt Eden, and for a long time I used to get up early every morning, cross the street and climb to the summit, often with my son’s dog Dexter. I like to be up there before anyone else, so I can hear the quiet of the sleeping city before the traffic hum and groups of chatty joggers start.

Every October the shining cuckoos – the pīpīwharauroa – arrive from Indonesia and start evicting the eggs from the nests of the grey warblers (riroriro) to make room for their own parasitic offspring. Some years I reckon I’ve been the first person in the city to hear these beautiful little freeloaders announcing their return from their winter break: three rising notes then a series of chittering downward swoops.

Of late, I’ve been getting up the hill only every couple of weeks.

My hip surgeon said I should avoid too much downhill walking, and though I toyed with the idea of carrying a trolley or skateboard to the top then freewheeling home, I never quite did.

But this morning, a Saturday in early December, I’m feeling fit and I’m up very early anyway, still a little jetlagged from the London neonatal conference. I’m technically at work – I’ve been the on-call consultant since the previous evening – but it’s been a quiet night and the cellphone in my pocket will let me know if I need to rush in before the scheduled ward round at 8.30am.

Rather than head direct to the summit, I take a detour through a small park at the base of the volcano. About 15 years ago I snuck in and did some guerilla gardening to fill in some gaps in the stand of bush along the park perimeter, and I like to see how my babies are coming along. The council’s drive to repopulate Auckland parks with native species is laudable, but seems rather fixated on pōhutukawa and a few varieties of pittosporum and coprosma, so I quietly increased the biodiversity by smuggling in a dozen or so different saplings: pūriri, karaka, kahikatea, toru, wharangi, tawa, tītoki, tawāpou and more. Some of them are now getting on for five metres in height. They’re looking splendid.

I take the road that gently spirals clockwise towards the summit, and as I get higher the familiar shapes of Auckland are revealed: uneven stripes of green land and shining water, and volcanoes in every direction. Over to the southeast, at the foot of Maungakiekie/One Tree Hill, is the old National Women’s Hospital, where I spent my first 20 years as a paediatric consultant. The hospital overlooked the fields of Cornwall Park, and I used to watch the grazing sheep, reputedly the very same ewes who’d borne the lambs used by Graham Liggins for his famous research into foetal lung development.

Just to the east is Ōhinerau/ Mt Hobson, a vigorous stone’s throw from my former paediatric clinic in Remuera. To the north is my current workplace, Auckland Hospital, which is built literally on top of a volcano – though to be fair, the 45,000-year-old scoria cone of Grafton Volcano was so well buried it wasn’t identified as such until building excavations unearthed it in the 1990s. The hospital complex is identifiable from a distance by the towering incinerator chimney next to the main building.

When I was a registrar at John Radcliffe Hospital in Oxford in the 1980s, one of my teachers was the professor of paediatrics Peter Tizard, an intimidatingly distinguished man who was knighted a few years later (I learnt afterwards that his father, also a sir, had helped design the UK’s radar system during the Second World War, invented the octane rating system for petrol, and led the UK’s first serious investigation into UFOs).

Anyway, once while we were examining a baby during a ward round, one of my colleagues asked Tizard a question: ‘We’ve done the tests to assess this child’s neurological state, but how do you assess his intellectual state?’

Tizard paused for a moment, then said: ‘I think probably the best measure of that is if a child gives you a good hard stare.’

Tizard and I didn’t get on terribly well – I got the feeling he always viewed me as an antipodean upstart – but that small, commonsense observation has stayed with me. There is nothing quite like the feeling you get when a newborn child locks you in her gaze – it’s a reassuring sign that there’s plenty

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the doctor

going on behind those pupils of bottomless black.

There is something intense, almost sombre, about a healthy newborn, and that’s not only because she’s still a month or two away from her first smile. It’s not fanciful to imagine that this child is conducting an investigation of the person who’s looking at her: Who the hell are you?

Do I know you?

Are you a good person?

Investigating you is precisely what she’s doing as she sets about the huge project of adapting herself to the world, as well as adapting the world to herself. As any new parent knows, the real power in this early relationship lies with the helpless creature who on the face of it can do little more than sleep, eat, poo and cry.

As a paediatrician I’ve been able to enjoy, over and over again, pleasures that most people only experience a handful of times with their own children or those of friends and family.

In the first few weeks of a baby’s life there’s plenty of fun to be had with a baby’s mirroring behaviour, as they observe, then try to reflect back, the expression on the face of their carer (though sometimes it’s hard to tell whether the poking tongue and furrowed brow are deliberate or a side effect of straining to fill a nappy).

By four to six weeks, you can expect the first smile. This is an important milestone and missing it can be an early warning of a developmental delay, so I’ve had a number of consultations where the matter at hand is ‘baby hasn’t smiled yet’.

Often the baby is ready to smile – they just haven’t had quite the encouragement they need. I demonstrate to parents how to move things along by hamming it up: screw up your face, poke out your tongue, give a big smile of your own, make some coos and gagas and peekaboos and get up in your baby’s face, and see what happens next. Once or twice I’ve managed to extract that first smile there and then in my office – the smallest but most rewarding clinical success you could imagine. This approach to a newborn baby was a particular skill demonstrated by a famous US paediatrican, Dr Berry Brazelton, who is one of my heroes in neonatology.

Some of these cases did, however, involve a mother who was suffering from postnatal depression and genuinely struggling to crack a smile of her own, so the long-term solution involved a bit more than an ad hoc lesson in clowning.

In the course of my work I’ve been witness to the first (or an early) instance of a giggle, a successful rolling over, a pushup and a handclap; of coos and gaas, bubble-blowing, crawling and first steps. Through childhood and all the way into adolescence there are firsts and milestones, and it’s always a pleasure to share in them.

With premature babies the calendar is timeshifted by their early arrival, so we talk about ‘adjusted age’ – the age a child

would be if they’d been born at full term. During those weeks or months in NICU where the adjusted age is still less than zero, the milestones we celebrate are fundamentally different from those of a full-termer: rather than a wise stare or a chortle, we’ll settle for a safe level of jaundice or a stable respiration pattern without ventilation. Yet even this early there are glimmers of individual personality, and you can distinguish the stroppy movers from the quiet observers.

Very early on, the youngest premature babies don’t even look entirely human. Some remind me of tiny piglets, and those who are born with a full-body coat of lanugo – a fine downy hair that grows on the foetus in utero but is usually shed at around eight months – are like cute little woodland creatures. (I’m always careful to assess the parental sense of humour before I start suggesting that someone’s baby looks like a pig or a rabbit; the responses can go either way.)

All this means that when a premature baby has done their catching up in NICU and been discharged home for a month or two, it’s a double thrill when the family come back in for a check-up and I discover this furry creature has been transformed into a bonny, ageadjusted six-week-old who’s now beaming at me from the pram.

It probably took me longer than it should have to realise that an obsession with milestones can interfere with seeing the individual child behind the measurements.

One of the reasons parents come to a paediatrician is because they worry that their child is different from their peers, or seems slow or ‘abnormal’.

But the more children I’ve seen, the more I love meeting those who are different or eccentric or quirky. I’m intrigued by those who are ahead of their milestones and those who are behind; by those with tics and unusual obsessions; by those with jiggling legs and inexhaustible energy, or a physical difference that will shape their life. In some cases I feel that my biggest achievement for a child has been to talk with the parents and help them realise that when it comes to this child, ‘different’ is totally OK. Extract reproduced with permission from Mind That Child by Dr Simon Rowley. RRP $38, published by Penguin NZ on June 1. Text © Simon Rowley, 2018. Photo of Dr Rowley supplied.

A graduate of the universities of Otago and Oxford, Rowley is also an honorary lecturer at the University of Auckland School of Medicine, a recipient of the Dennis Pickup Clinical Educator Award (2014) and a Distinguished Clinical Teacher Award (2015). One of his specialist areas is neonatal brain development, he is a trustee and presenter for the Brainwave Trust. Other areas of interest include early childhood behavioural and developmental outcomes, and medical ethics.

In particular, he is interested in how we make decisions about end-of-life care in the vulnerable, sick or newborn infant. p

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the hobson + farro

What's for Dinner?

F

arro has a great range of recipes and ingredients for delicious weekday dinners to please everyone in the household. And if you need a super-quick solution to the age-old “what’s for dinner?” question, check out our brand new Farro Kitchen range.

Made by our team daily, we use only the freshest, quality ingredients and free-range chicken, New Zealand grass-fed lamb and beef, and Freedom Farms pork. The Farro Kitchen menu includes Southern Thai Chicken Curry, Lamb Tagine and Pork and Beef ragu ($15.99 each), all ready to heat and serve (finish off with some sticky date pud, $11.99).

Come instore for more inspiration: we look forward to seeing you at Lunn Ave or Orakei Bay Village — now with free parking— or our new Mt Eden store, 422 Dominion Rd.

Have you tried Pastrami & Rye's delicious pastrami and bacon?

Pastrami & Rye in Ellerslie are renowned for their New York-style reuben sandwiches. We now have Dave’s delicious pastrami and bacon available. It’s made the old school way, starting with NZ pork and grass-fed beef brisket that is house-smoked and cured in herbs and spices. The packaging is also something to behold: 100 per cent compostable and wrapped in New Zealand muslin cloth – great for storing meat in the fridge! $9.50.

Recipe of the Month: Spicy Beef Skewers with Tahini Sauce and Dukkah

1 tsp Farro ground cumin Small bunch mint, roughly chopped Salt and pepper to taste

Serves 4 Prep time 15-20 minutes, plus 20 minutes marinating Cooking time 10-15 minutes

Method Place the harissa, paprika, tahini, garlic, salt and pepper in a bowl and mix to combine. Add the beef and toss to coat.

Cover and refrigerate for 20 mins to marinate.

Ingredients 1 tbsp Le Phare du Cap Bon harissa paste 2 tsp La Chinata sweet smoked paprika ⅓ cup Ceres unhulled tahini 2 cloves garlic, crushed 1 tsp sea salt flakes 1 tsp cracked black pepper 850 grams beef rump steak, trimmed and cut into 5cm cubes 1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil 1 tbsp Alexander’s Dukkah 1 pottle Silwood watercress sprigs or mixed greens combi Lemon wedges, to serve For the Spiced Tahini Sauce 1 cup Zany Zeus Greek yoghurt 1 cup Ceres unhulled tahini the hobson 31

To make the spiced tahini sauce, place the yoghurt, tahini, cumin, mint, salt and pepper in a bowl and stir to combine. If needed, add 2-3 tablespoons of water to achieve your desired consistency, set aside.

Preheat a chargrill pan, oven grill or BBQ to high heat. Thread 2 pieces of beef onto metal or bamboo skewers soaked in water, repeat with the remaining beef.

Drizzle the beef skewers with the oil and cook for 10 mins, turning, for medium rare or until cooked to your liking.

Serve the skewers with the tahini sauce, dukkah, watercress and lemon wedges.

the journey

Ice Ice Baby The hottest place to go right now is somewhere very cold Stacy Gregg takes a tour of beauty in Iceland

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s an author, it’s always perplexed me that Elizabeth Knox wrote her best-selling novel The Vintner’s Luck without ever actually setting foot in France.

I find this baffling for two reasons. Firstly, I simply cannot fathom the idea of writing a book set in a country that I haven’t been to. Secondly – duh – it’s a tax deductible business expense. Elizabeth, go stay in a chateau and drink some wine for Pete’s sake!

So far my books have taken me to Jordan, Spain, Italy and Russia. All of it, ahem-cough, for research purposes of course.

And now, Iceland. Because I like to set my novels somewhere deeply obscure where no one else would ever think of going.

“Oh Iceland!” My publisher at HarperCollins says when I stop by the London office for drinks. “How marvellous! Everyone is going there. It’s very hot right now.”

I blithely pretend that I’m being intentionally zeitgeisty rather than admitting that Iceland’s newfound popularity is a bit gutting. It is hot right now, it’s true. I blame the Americans – they’ve taken to offering a free stopover in Iceland with most European flights. And of course I blame Game of Thrones. Season seven was heavy on white walker scenes and all of those are shot in Iceland. Reykjavik is the new Hobbiton.

Most of the Game of Thrones scenes are shot at Iceland’s national park, Thingvellir, which is about an hour to the south of Reykjavik. But really the film crew could have saved themselves the trip and just set up their cameras on the side of the road as they left the airport. Even the immediate landscape in that one hour bus ride between Keflavik International and downtown Reykjavik is incredible and otherwordly, a snowy moonscape of spectacular nothingness.

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Wojtek Chmielewski/Shutterstock Claire Nolan/Unsplash

Author Stacy Gregg in Thingvellir national park; the local horses she came to ride, the city of Reykjavik

The nothingness stems from the fact that there are only 345,000 people in Iceland (if you don’t count the tourist hordes) and a third of them live in Reykjavik. Like, imagine the North Island being populated by only the people of Parnell and you get the idea of how much space there is left.

You’ll want to spend two days in Reykjavik. You don’t need any more than that as the city has the size and sprawl of Parnell too. You can walk your way around all the sights comfortably on your first day. Take your pick between the penis museum (the Icelandic Phallological Museum has the world’s largest display of the male animals’ thing) and the punk museum, browse yourself some very Spinal Tap-inspired Viking trinkets, buy a street-cred ski beanie at North 66, and you’re pretty much done. Food and drink is pricey here – even one of the famed Icelandic hotdogs and a soda will set you back over $20. But splash out! Have

dinner at the excellent Fish Company on Ingolfur Square where they serve up Icelandic seafood prepared in both traditional and international ways, with a good wine list. And since you are here for a good time, not a long time, go luxe with your digs.

Architecturally, Reykjavik is a strange blend of Tyrolean and Eastern Bloc, and most of the accommodation is underwhelming.

So my extremely firm recommendation is that you stay at the Sandhotel. With the rooms built above Reykjavik’s yummiest artisanal bakery and chicest menswear retailer, the hotel is truly my perfect boutique hotel. Classic and understated, the rooms are spacious and indulgent in subtle ways with velvet chairs, plush beds, marble tubs and parquet floors. There’s a brilliant bistro downstairs that does real Icelandic cuisine with a modern twist (you want kimchi with that crowberry?) without playing into the tourist gambits of serving up puffins or fermented shark.

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the journey

Left: The boutique Sandhotel, Reykjavik. Above, walking below the Law Rock, Thingvellir, a UNESCO world heritage site. Top, and right, Hotel Ranga is popular for guests viewing the aurora borealis, and its globally-themed suites and the in-house polar bear, Hrammur

The Sandhotel bistro prices are good too and we spent our happiest hours in the city sitting on the moss green velvet banquettes by the windows watching the snow fall on the main street right outside, drinking the house speciality of white mulled wine and planning our itinerary.

You are really missing a trick if you plan a trip that doesn’t involve hiring a car and getting out of Reykjavik and into the countryside. The epic splendour of the landscape is really what Iceland is all about and you don’t have to go far to find it. Less than an hour and a half’s drive from downtown Reykjavik is Thingvellir – the national park that features as the main location in Game of Thrones. It also features as the main location in my new book, The Fire Stallion.

Standing on the Law Rock at Thingvellir, where Iceland’s Viking tribes met to hold what amounted to their AGM over a thousand years ago, I feel the pieces of the puzzle that is my book coming together.

From there we drive to the South, through dramatic mountains and heathered volcanic plains that rival our South Island’s West Coast in terms of epic grandeur, heading for the coast.

The Southern coast is the best place to see the Northern Lights if you are hunting them, and the very best place of all, according

to the guides, is the Hotel Ranga. And that’s where we’re heading now.

At the Hotel Ranga we kick back in one of the upstairs themed suites, The Japanese Room. It’s the one Kourtney Kardashian chose when she stayed for her birthday. She got kicked out of the hot tub during her stay for being noisy and bothering the other guests. We are much better behaved, and we brave the snow in our togs to leap in with glasses of wine, our faces going numb in the icy wind that blows in off the mountains nearby.

The upstairs suites are all themed to different countries and the next night we move to Antarctica. It has life-size emperor penguin figurines in the living room standing sentry at the bathtub, and full 360-degree picture windows so you can see the Northern Lights without leaving your bed. If you fancy something more Scandi-basic, the downstairs rooms are woody and chic.

In the hotel restaurant we dine on langoustines and reindeer carpaccio, and salmon caught from the river that runs outside our door. We take day trips to snow-mobile across volcanoes and go clambering down into the ice caves. And we ride horses of course, the famous Icelandic horse, the country’s own equine breed. They may look like adorable furballs on the ground, but when you climb onboard they are powerful, spirited and sure of

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vvoe/Shutterstock

hoof, with their distinctive extra gait, the tölt, a fast trot where the rider doesn’t rise from the saddle. Draconian biosecurity controls mean that the breed has remained isolated and pure blooded. These are literally the horses the Vikings rode, although it’s hard to imagine a strapping Viking onboard an Icelandic horse because size-wise they are not much bigger than a child’s pony.

Being onboard at a mad tölt as we cross the endless tussock plains, I get a feel for how it must have been for my book’s Viking heroine, Brunhilda, a thousand years ago. And that, I guess, is the reason I came. p Stacy Gregg was a guest of the Sandhotel, Reykjavik, sandhotel.is/en/forsida; and in southern Iceland, the Hotel Ranga, hotelranga.is Both properties are part of the “independently minded” Small Luxury Hotels group, slh.com For more information on Icelandic horses and places to book a ride, visit horsesoficeland.is Stacy Gregg is the internationally-published author of 22 books for 8-12 year olds, all of them about horses and many recognised with awards. A former fashion journalist, she lives in Parnell and shares an Arabian horse, the impossibly handsome Cam, with her 18-year-old daughter, Isadora.

the heritage

Local Affairs Long before the advent of the Super City, Auckland’s suburban councils weathered many changes — growing, shrinking, amalgamating, and finally, disappearing. In this edited extract from the new Parnell Heritage Journal, author and local resident Graham Bush charts the incarnations and power plays of Parnell Borough Council

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he issue of better government on the Tamaki Isthmus stirred again at the beginning of the 20th century.

However, for a long time marching forward under the banner of ‘The Greater Auckland Movement’ seemed more like marking time. A cartoon in The Observer in February 1904 lampooned the suburban councils as sleepily complacent: Parnell was called ‘PA. Smell’. The election of Arthur Myers to the Auckland City mayoralty in 1905 on an unequivocal platform of amalgamation recharged the campaign but hostile suburban authorities, among which the Parnell Borough Council was prominent, managed to frustrate any tangible progress.

The issue remained passively on the agenda until 1912 when three factors coincided to force its serious pursuit.

First, barrister Christopher James Parr had succeeded to the Auckland City mayoralty unopposed and pledging to reactivate the ‘Greater Auckland’ goal. Second, the City Council pointblank refused to create any more special purpose bodies like the Auckland & Suburban Drainage Board, letting inadequate suburban authorities ‘off the hook’. They were clearly unable to provide necessary services and infrastructure.

Third, with the introduction of radical local body reform

Bills into Parliament, change was clearly in the air. The 17 other local bodies which then shared the local governance of the Tamaki Isthmus with Auckland City would have been extremely myopic not to see the writing on the wall. They might be intransigent, but if they were astutely presented with an appealing package of improved services and financial inducements, their ratepayers could well be amenable.

Which of the six local bodies abutting Auckland City might be the first to agree to its abolition and absorption into its larger neighbour? Hitherto hostile Parnell Borough would not have been a reasoned choice, yet surprisingly it was the first to tread this one-way path. There are two possible explanations.

First, its 490 acres and 5465 inhabitants were inherently a part of inner Auckland and its economic and social milieu. Second, the City Council calculated that its residents, recognising this, could be susceptible to responding to the right sort of amalgamation offer. From the City Council’s perspective, successfully enticing an authority with borough status into the fold could encourage other suburban authorities which might be tentatively considering such a move themselves.

As to where the drive to amalgamate with Auckland City actually gained traction, the most credible suspect is

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MERRIMAN

Extracted from “Parnell Borough Council: transformation, amalgamation and abolition” by Graham Bush, Parnell Heritage Journal,Issue 7, on sale from June 1 at Paper Plus Parnell, the White Heron Diary and parnellheritage.org.nz RRP $15 Graham Bush specialised in teaching and researching local government at the University of Auckland. The author of eight books, his most recent is From Survival to Revival: Auckland’s Public Transport since 1860 (2014). An active public transport advocate, he has lived in Parnell since 2009. p

the hobson 37

PARNELL STATION

PHARMACY IN PARNELL

AND OTHER STORIES FROM PARNELL’S PAST

Sir George Grey Special Collections, Auckland Libraries. NZG-19100427-18-16

one Charles Edgar Palmer. An insurance company manager, Palmer had unsuccessfully tried to topple the existing mayor, Richard Stevenson Briggs, in the April 1912 biennial local body elections. Unable to convince those Parnellites who voted that he was better fitted to lead the Borough Council, Palmer then plotted a different course. In August he convened a public meeting to discuss the state of Parnell and its management. The general mood of those attending was that the Borough Council ‘needed livening up’.

A Ratepayers Association was formed and Palmer was elected its president.

Less than two months later, Palmer headed a powerful deputation of the renamed Parnell Ratepayers & Electors Association to Parr, urging on the Mayor the merits of absorbing the Borough of Parnell into Auckland City.

Five other nearby local bodies – Newmarket and Grey Lynn boroughs and Eden Terrace, Arch Hill and Remuera road districts – were also flitting around the amalgamation light, inexorably undermining Parnell Borough Council’s resistance. Its principle response was twofold. First, the Council promised that there would be no increase in the low general rate for 10 years.

All this did was signal a continued starvation of funding for basic service.

Second, it undertook a long overdue upgrading of roads. In September the Borough Council received a detailed report from its engineer, John Rogers, setting out a comprehensive scheme for sealing the majority of roads, virtually all of which were only gravelled. The outlay was to be met by a £75,000 loan. Rogers paid the Borough Council a backhanded compliment: he said Parnell is a strictly residential suburb possessing many natural advantages ‘to which due attention has not been given’. The Council duly approved the loan, but if not too little, it was certainly too late to swing opinion.

Briggs asserted that Parnell rates were 7½ pence in the pound lower than Auckland’s, but he was rebutted by Parr who accused him of ignoring several imposts on Parnell ratepayers which in effect amounted to rates. Parr then rubbed in the issue of neglect: in Parnell there was not a single street which had a proper foundation and half the streets lacked any kerbing and channelling.

The Ratepayers Association then gathered more than sufficient signatures (300) petitioning for a poll to ascertain the wishes of local residents and reinforced the momentum for change by staging a packed meeting of electors a few days prior to the poll scheduled for early December. All the speakers cited in press reports urged that Parnell Borough join the City. Quoted were Joseph Thorne, a former mayor, William Jones, a former chair of the Borough Council Finance Committee and George Scarborough, a sitting councillor. Typical of the views expressed were that ‘Parnell had stood still’ and that ‘rates were insufficient to pay expenses’. Unsurprisingly, the meeting voted in favour of amalgamation, although the New Zealand Herald article gave no indication of the exact majority.

ISSUE 7 2018 Of the 2713 electors registered to vote, 1186 went to the poll. From the disappointing 43.7 per cent turnout, it can only be inferred that the majority of electors were unconcerned whether they paid their rates to the Parnell Borough Council or Auckland City Council. Only 733 people PARNELL BOROUGH COUNCIL voted to join Auckland City but substantially fewer (433) opted to retain BOOKS FOR PARNELLITES independence as Parnell Borough. The City Council offered cheaper JOHN ABBOTT AND THE ROYAL FOUNDATION FOR water, reduced fire insurance premiums, a new library, a new park and THE BLIND a £25,000 public works loan.

FREDERICK WARD

the magpie

Paws for Effect Usually, a bird gives cats and dogs a wide berth but even The Magpie couldn't resist these fur-people treats

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1. Bring some Alessi charm to chow time. The Lula Dog Bowl is especially cool with its handy lid and all-round good looks. $210, from Askew, 2b Jervois Rd, Ponsonby 2. One for the little guys with big style personalities, the Karen Walker Bow Charm Dog Leash. $60, Karen Walker, Balm St, or karenwalker.com 3. Feeling a little scratchy? Keep your feline friend’s attention off me and my feathered friends with this Cat Tower, $49, kmart.co.nz 4. Found My Animal rope collars are handmade in Brooklyn, New York, using quality leather and marine-grade rope which is durable, and softens up beautifully after a few outings. We can’t swear they’re made by actual Brooklyn hipsters, but your dog will look New York cool. Sized from XS to XL, they start at $79. There’s leads too. eightpaws.co.nz 5. A dog for your shelf, the charming Wooden Dog Figurine in walnut is by Danish designer Kay Bojesen. First created in 1934, this little fellow still looks at home today. $186, from nz.amara.com 6. Ideal for the dog on the go, the Foldable Travel Dog Bed in waxed tartan by Cloud 7 is comfortable, compact and machine washable.

Medium $240, large, $297 from nz.amara.com 7. There’s no doubt it’s a shitty job but it can be done in style.

Doggy-Do Bag by Cloud 7, $39, eightpaws.co.nz 8. Local pet-style gurus The Collar Club lead the pack with The Jack Lead in on-trend ombre (also available in solid colours). Soft but strong, it’s a cotton-fibre lead with solid brass hardware. $99, from Central Bark, St Georges Bay Rd, Parnell 9. WashBar is the shizzle when it comes to dog care. NZ-made from allnatural ingredients known for their healing qualities, the whole range is well worth checking out. Original Soap, $10.50, cleanses with Neem and other essential oils, and is gentle enough to be used on chickens, bunnies and you. Paw Balm, $19.95, soothes dry paws with apricot oil and organic beeswax (and is safe to lick off). washbar.com (Check The Hobson Weekly for our WashBar giveaway, sign up on our Facebook page if you haven’t already)

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10. Is it mean? Is it funny?

We’ll leave that up to you.

Fabdog Walk of Shame Hoodie US$25, from shop.fabdog.com 11. Hours of entertainment, ok, actually weeks! Zeal Dried Beef Hooves are nothing but 100 per cent NZ cattle hooves, which make for a durable chew with no mess, no fat, no oil, just pure goodness, and fun. $10.95, zealpetfood.com

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11. Gourmet pet, much? Zeal Dried Venison Puffs make quite the fancy treat. High in protein, low in fat, these 100 per cent natural treats are devoured with relish by both cats and dogs.

Serve whole as a treat, or crush and sprinkle over food. $10.95, from zealpetfood.com 12. Doesn’t hear you calling? Try your luck with The Acme Shepherd’s Mouth Whistle.

Made in England, $12, eightpaws.co.nz 13. At $9 a pop, how could you not? Pet Puffer Jackets from K-Mart are just a little bit cute.

This one is a size XL, to fit a Labrador or similar bigger chap or lady 14. If the dog bed is detracting from your décor, Bianca Lorenne pet beds are the remedy! Big, luxurious, divine beds (with washable covers) they add glamour and comfort. In three sizes, from $295, from Askew, 2B Jervois Rd

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the hobson 39

the sound

Mean to Me

S

o another New Zealand Music Month has come and gone. I’m amazed it’s still a thing. Why? I’ll get there.

I was a music radio programmer back when it started. It was born out of a frustration that American-consulted NZ radio stations ignored local product. And they were almost right. Back in the 80s, less than 3 per cent of music played on New Zealand radio came from our own country. There were famous stories of stations ignoring artists like Neil Finn’s Crowded House until they were a hit overseas. But that’s not exactly true.

In 1986 I was programming Radio Hauraki. When Crowded House’s self-titled first album came out, I scheduled the first single against my programme director’s advice. After all, Split Enz was well loved and the song had a thing.

The song was “Mean to Me”.

We put it on. It tanked. Our audience research showed that our listeners not only didn’t like the song, they actually hated it. Its negative results from research panels were some of the highest we ever saw. I was gobsmacked. It seemed to me people were actively hating our music.

So from then on the next few singles were ignored. “World Where We Live” and “Now We're Getting Somewhere” came and went, unplayed. It wasn’t until “Don't Dream It’s Over” made its bold run in America to peak at Number 2 did Crowded House get played on Hauraki.

So we went backwards as the album rose up the charts, and played the songs we ignored and they belatedly became hits. And now we all know the songs that we hated. It led me to the conclusion that the Kiwi knocking machine existed not just amongst programmers but also the general population. I don’t know why, but back then New Zealand artists had higher bars to vault.

And it took a lot of time to dispel. We all know Crowded House’s “Weather With You” and “Four Seasons in One Day”. So would it surprise you that neither track made it to the top of our charts? “Weather” made it to No 9 here, and No 7 in the UK. “Four Seasons” made it all the way to 33! So before you get stuck into radio, we’re all in this together in not supporting our artists.

In 2000 my good friend Mike Regal decided to get stuck in. He was the programme director for Radio Hauraki. He convinced the industry to try for 20 per cent NZ music quota on radio, voluntarily. And the industry gave it a good whack. Meanwhile, NZ Music Month became an event.

In its heyday, NZ Music Month sold t-shirts and stirred a real cauldron of patriotism, and it was quite a thing. But underneath it was a sentiment that it was an artificial celebration and the real celebration would happen when NZ music was a major force in the

market without quotas or commemorative months.

So in 2018 the month still exists, and we’re forced to ask where is it at. The month is still a thing — but not in the ears of the nation.

I’m not sure this year they really noticed. On my radio programme, we played Kiwi music all month long and it sounded natural.

On commercial radio the verdict is that we went one step backwards and one step forwards. Last month, The Spinoff decided to listen to all the local music stations for an hour in honour of it being NZ Music Month. The older ones did not do well — More FM, The Breeze, The Rock, The Hits and The Sound played no Kiwi music in their hour. But George, Hauraki, The Edge and Flava all easily broke the arbitrary 20 per cent level.

To me, it shows a new generation who are far more comfortable with Kiwi creativity. Far more mature. NZ Music is actually thriving amongst all the challenges the new digital environment throws at it. You could argue that the digital revolution is the best thing to happen to a small music market.

We've never had so many successful international artists. Lorde of course, but also The Naked and Famous, Broods, Fat Freddy’s and Kimbra, who released an awesome album in May. May also saw Marlon Williams sell out two nights at the Auckland Town Hall. Now I can safely say the only commercial radio station that has played Marlon is ZB, a talk station. He’s not at home at any other commercial radio network and yet, look at what he’s done.

Last month also saw Adeaze release their first album in seven years and it’s a doozy. Kings dropped a surprise record. The most pleasurable release has been Julia Dean’s first record in eight years.

The former Fur Patrol lead singer has released We Light Fire. It’s a long time between drinks for Julia because she’s been so busy with Jacques Brel and Joni Mitchell tributes, working with The Adults, a NZ supergroup, and playing in Jesus Christ Superstar.

The point is that you can make a living from music in this country now, more than ever. The rider is that you need to be good, and that exists everywhere. The internet means barriers have been broken and our isolation is a thing of the past. It also means the old argument about the radio is dead. Radio is not a music breaker anymore. It’s company and talk with a bit of music.

NZ Music Month has done its work. For a new generation there’s no reflexive wince when we play NZ music. In fact that actually makes it cooler, when you can see the acts live in front of your eyes instead of on a screen. So I wonder if we need it anymore because every day is a NZ music day, which is what we wanted after all.

— Andrew Dickens

The "most pleasurable" new album of May came from Julia Deans, above. Photo: Mareea Vegas

the hobson 40

the district diary

June 2018 2 The son of the late, great John Bonham, Jason Bonham’s Led Zeppelin Evening will take you back in time with home video footage, iconic art and of course all the Zeppelin classics. Logan Campbell Centre, 8-10.30pm, ticketmaster.co.nz 3 The 13th International Documentary Film Festival ends tonight with a screening of Spielberg, where the famous filmmaker opens up about his lifelong obsession with filmmaking and his rise to fame, followed by the festival wrap party at Citizen Q. From 6.30pm, tickets from qtheatre.co.nz, dress code festive!

4 Queen’s Birthday public holiday 6 The sun’ll come out tomorrow . . . and every day until June 10, at the Selwyn Community Theatre Group’s production of Annie — The Musical. Nightly performances plus Sat/Sun matinees, Selwyn Theatre, 203245 Kohimarama Rd, iticket. co.nz for tickets 14 Every Thursday, an afternoon of Indoor Bowls at the Somervell Presbyterian Church, cnr Greenlane and Remuera Rd. Beginners welcome, cup of tea provided, $5 membership then $3/wk, 1.15-3.30pm. Ph 524 5379 for info 18 Rock around the clock to the greatest hits of the 50s and 60s at Shake, Rattle & Roll with Operatunity. Starring Suzanne Lynch and Pat Urlich, operatunity.co.nz or call 0508 266 237 for tickets. Somervell Presbyterian Church, cnr Greenlane and Remuera Rd, 11am-1pm 20 Show your support for the Child Cancer Foundation on

Wig Wednesday by getting wiggy with it at your school or business! Open to anyone, register at www.wigwednesday. org.nz or 0800 424 453 The Remuera Residents Association AGM will be held tonight at the Remuera Library, 7.30pm. Keynote speaker and hot topics affecting our community.

All welcome, contact chair Iain Valentine on 021 377 706 if you have issues you’d like raised

THE HOBSON GOES WEEKLY! Don’t miss your weekly electronic update of neighbourhood news, events, happenings and special offers, delivered fresh to your inbox every Thursday

The third Wednesday of every month, Parnell U3A has guest speakers, presentations and morning tea for seniors, at the Jubilee Building, 545 Parnell Rd, 9.30am 23 Fresh, original, high quality, locally sourced and handmade crafts, the 4th Saturday of each month at Craft Harvest Market.

Alongside Parnell Farmers’ Market, Jubilee Hall, 545 Parnell Road, 8am-11.45am 24 The Winter Wedding Fair in the beautiful Highwic gardens, 40 Gillies Ave, offers wedding professionals to advise on your special day, plus special discounts, from photographers to cakes, gowns and much more.

Free entry from 10am-12pm, then $5 from 12-4pm. Tickets at the gate or from eventfinda.co.nz 30 Today marks the start of Matariki, the Māori New Year, and with that comes the sights, sounds and tastes of the Matariki Festival, until July 22. Keep an eye on next month’s Diary for Matariki events near you The Great Australasian Beer SpecTAPular offers 90 unique beers and ciders brewed especially for the festival; chat to the makers, feast on street foods, strut your putt at the Holey Moley Golf Club. 18+ event, ASB Showgrounds, 12pm-5pm and 6.30pm-11.30pm, tickets from gabsfestival.com

Sign up today for our weekly e-newsletter and you won't miss anything going on in the neighbourhood. A quick, fun read, The Hobson Weekly is your invaluable local guide.

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the cryptic by mĀyĀ

ACROSS 1 Falls beneath the 19 23? (7) 5 See 21 9 Pad at university with bearer of arm (9) 10 Doddery OAP OK with giant invisible rabbit (5) 11 Shred first item on the agenda (4) 12 Church official knowing AC/DC retailer (10) 14 Chains can be found in the 19 23 (7) 15 Quiet cowboy losing heart to reindeer (7) 17 Man who would be King of the Impaired Orbits (3-4) 19/23 Noises can be traced to this water feature (7,4) 21/5A/24 Is a water-repellent arch running - possibly with a tray of drinks? (3,7,7,4) 23 See 19

25 Perfect for cricket? (5) 26 I’m chasing players dropping catch (apes!) (9) 27 A drink at 12’s place, say, found in the 19 23 (3,4) 28 Lubricator of good rubber with right to advance (7) DOWN 1 Mischievous fabrication heard, possibly in the 19 23 (7) 2 Harmless fabrication of smack in a gumboot (not left one) (1,5,3) 3 Rod left aboard cutter (4) 4 Star worker going to Mars? (7) 5 Love getting one for nothing (sometimes found in the 19 23) (7) 6 Sanction one policeman on old city

ramparts (10) 7 Time of rising expectation, about a century (5) 8 One making angry retort in the 19 23 (7) 13 Factory owner has ’elpful artists turn up; almost all accommodated (4,6) 16 Copper accepts blame; scoundrel, wanting closure, gets very drunk (9) 17 Cops out swimming in the 19 23 (7) 18 Refusing to study unknown gin mixture (7) 19 Wells into which Toffler has fallen reducing by 50% (7) 20 Fashionable fellow addict to get teapot (7) 22 Bonus supplied by next rating (5) 24 See 21 Across

Set by Māyā. Answers will appear in our next issue (July/August 2018). Can’t wait, or need help? Visit https://thehobsoncrossword.wordpress.com/

MAY CRYPTIC CROSSWORD ANSWERS Across: 1 Ockhams, 5 Manhire, 9 Off-colour, 10 Mufti, 11 Noah, 12 At the least, 15 Runic, 16 Amp, 20 Gas, 21 Eli, 22 Señor, 23/28/18 How lucky we are, 25 Ladle, 27/1D Ella Yelich-O'Connor, 31/36 Hone Tuwhare, 33 Lichi, 34 Superhero, 35 Cryogen Down: 2 Kofi Annan, 3 Amos, 5 Marsh, 6 Nimblewill, 7 Infra, 8 Epistle, 13/4 Tom scott, 14 A c grayling, 16 Ash, 17 Pew, 19 Andromeda, 22 Shellac, 24 Oui, 26 Eyesore, 29 Lysin, 30 Caput, 32 Crow

the hobson 42

Each office is independently owned and operated. Browns Real Estate Limited (licensed under the REAA 2008) MREINZ. nzsothebysrealty.com/NZE10526

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9 Princes St, Auckland theinternational.co.nz 0800 20 20 90

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NEW YORK - ON QUAY

11C/148 QUAY STREET, AUCKLAND

Property Ref. NZE10881

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We’re delighted to congratulate Ross Hawkins on being awarded our National Top Performing Licensee for the sixth year running.

Ross Hawkins M +64 274 720 577 ross.hawkins@sothebysrealty.com

National Top Performing Licensee 2013 - 2018

Each Office Is Independently Owned And Operated.

Browns Real Estate Limited (licensed under the REAA 2008) MREINZ.