Features

From the front line…

Civil aviation and personal freedom should be inviolate

BY JACQUELINE CURZON

A horrific accident in the Italian Alps killed 14 people last week when a cable car plunged to the ground, possibly as the result of a snapped cable. Of the 15 occupants in the car, 14 of them - including one child - died. The only survivor was a little boy of 5, who lost his grandparents, parents and his 2 year old brother. In China disaster hit marathon runners three hours into a high altitude mountain race, when they encountered hail, freezing rain and gale winds. Emergency services were called out, and although 700 personnel undertook a rescue mission throughout the night, authorities confirmed that 21 of 172 participants had perished, including two of China’s professional long distance runners, Liang Jing and Huang Guanjun.

In an article about Britain’s craft renaissance it was brought to our attention about crafts under threat of extinction. The Heritage Craft Association added 20 new practices to the ‘critically endangered’ category of its latest red list. Amongst this list were wainwrights (skilled in the making and repairing of wagons and carts) and of special interest to me is pointe shoe making, which is essential to the ballet industry. As my daughter has recently gone ‘on pointe,’ I’ve become familiar with the brands available, namely Grishko (Russian), Bloch (German), Capezio, Sansha (Italian) and Freeds of London. Diamond cutting, barometer making and horse hair weaving are other crafts on the danger list, as is the making of glass eyes. Jost Haas, a maker of glass eyes, trained for four years in Germany, and still holds clinics at Moorfields Eye Hospital, London, as an ocularist. As he approaches retirement, his skill will be lost for good. Some industries have fared better during covid, including gilding, reverse glass signwriting and rug tufting. If you fancy taking up a new hobby, look no further.

An unattended Honesty Gallery in Soho had all its pictures - valued at £1000 each - pinched by thieves, who even took the signs with them. The artist, Andrew Brown, who had devised it as a social experiment, said it had been a ‘dismal failure.’ Big shame!

The big C is back in the news; no longer covid, but the cost of cancer, which predicted 304,000 people have either missed a cancer screening or a referral. We are in danger of seeing cancer become the next pandemic. One case which I wish to flag up is that of Jess Brady (27), a satellite engineer experiencing chronic fatigue and a cough she couldn’t shake off. Doctors insisted it was long Covid, although she had never been diagnosed with coronavirus, and the sporty young woman’s symptoms made her increasingly debilitated with weight loss and vomiting. She contacted her GP surgery more than 20 times in five months and went to A&E. By last November her mother was alarmed over the possibility of cancer as large glands had appeared on her neck. When they finally managed a face-to-face appointment with the GP, these concerns were dismissed because she was young and healthy, and there was no knowing how long a referral would take. Such was her mother’s concern that Jess secured a private hospital appointment with urgent tests, which identified a stage 4 adenocarcinoma which had spread throughout her body. As it was by then too advanced and aggressive to treat, Ms Brady died on December 20, less than a month after being diagnosed. Stories like this are an absolute disgrace, and a failure of GPs to resume face-to-face appointments will prompt more heartbreaking stories. Late diagnosis has set survival rates back by eight years, according to Cancer Research UK. I feel that GPs who had a hands off approach for the whole lockdown should be subject to disciplinary action, for they had an obligation to continue with urgent diagnoses and treatment. Dental patients are now facing up to a three-year wait to be seen under the NHS, with 80% of those surveyed by Healthwatch England complaining about waiting times. Some NHS patients are being removed from lists and told they can instead be seen ‘privately.’ A DHSC spokesman said ‘we are committed to supporting the dental sector… so everyone can access affordable, high quality care, and all practices have been able to deliver a full range of face-to-face care since last June.’ Who writes this nonsense?

A little bit of news concerning Scotland and the SNP relates to the Eurovision Song Contest. A senior SNP, Rhiannon Spear, has now apologised after posting a hostile tweet, after the UK’s entry flopped in Eurovision. [When has it not been a pop flop?] She had tweeted, ‘it’s okay Europe, we hate the UK too.’ If this is typical of the sentiments and calibre of the party in power, we should simply resign ourselves to a divorce and be done with it.

Keeping a foot in the door of politics, it was outrageous to hear of the Ryanair plane forced to divert to Minsk, to facilitate the imprisonment of Belorusian journalist Roman Protasevich (26) and his Russian girlfriend Sofia Sapega (23). They had been on a work assignment accompanying Sviatlana Tsikhanouskaya, an exiled Belarus opposition leader, to the Delphi Economic Forum. The flight - Athens to Vilnius - was diverted after a spurious security threat, and only 2 minutes before entering Lithuanian airspace. To persuade the Captain to comply, a handy Belarusian MiG 29 fighter popped up alongside for ‘encouragement.’ Protasevich knew what the announcement meant, and told fellow passengers he could not land there, for he had been living in exile since 2019 and was designated a terrorist by Lukashenko. Things had begun to look suspicious at the airport when a Russian man standing behind the journalist at check in snapped a picture of his documents before suddenly turning away; however there were still other men in the queue watching him. Michael O’Leary, CEO of Ryanair believes there were KGB agents on the flight, presumably to escalate the situation should the captain refuse to comply, or the journalist resist getting off the plane. There followed a document check for all passengers and a show of emptying some bags, but the SWAT team and accompanying police were only interested in the journalist, who said candidly, ‘the death sentence awaits me.’ Three other passengers got off at Minsk, all of them with Russian passports, so quite likely they were the KGB agents. I would have hoped that the flight would have forced its way on to Vilnius, with the Captain locking himself in his cockpit. It was only minutes from safety and extremely unlikely Lukashenko would have shot down a passenger plane, although we can’t be overly confident of that. One must additionally sympathise with the terror this obviously inflicted on the passengers and crew. Belarus has said Sapega and Protasevich are being held in Okrestina prison (Minsk), and a video was released last night saying he has ‘not been harmed.’ Believe that if you will. Make no mistake, we have just sent this young man to his death.

Such a blatant act of aggression was air piracy, plain and simple, instigated by a known dictator and underpinned by Moscow. Hooray, let’s give ten points to the Kremlin: - The Aerovision Contest has no opposition. It's never going to be a fair game putting a fighter jet up against a lowly passenger plane, so interesting now to see how the west responds. There seems to be nowhere in the world left where free speech is encouraged or permitted (often including here), with communist countries notoriously known for their suppression and harsh punishment of those who mouth the word ‘democracy.’ Were it so simple that sanctions were unilaterally imposed, decency would be restored, but as long as most of Europe are beholden to Mother Russia for energy supplies, their protests will be tokenism at best, and Putin knows that. President Biden last week partially removed sanctions on companies building the pipeline which runs from Siberia through Belarus to Europe. Assuming the Embassy doesn’t scour the internet looking for references to Russia and the Kremlin, I doubt they’ll come looking for me. Although, if you do see me being forced into a car, please don’t assume I’m going on a surprise vacation….

Okay, hands up those who are game for a run round the jungle gym? As my twins are now completing year six, they have a medley of enjoyable outings to round it all off. It was however a little disconcerting for them to insist that I accompany them to Go Ape. Having done zero research on this, I bravely decided when I got there I would just give it a go, and got harnessed up. I set off on the first level of the course, after which you’re expected to either progress to a much harder level, or to stick with what you’ve done already. Now, not one to be easily deterred, I opted for level two, only to find it quite alarming with bridges galore swinging wildly as one tried to wobble from step to step. Never mind the considerable height you are above the forest floor and the slightly unnerving zip line you need to complete your circuit, I can honestly say the last time I undertook anything of this level would’ve been for a pre-RCB back in the 80s and of course I’m now considerably older with health issues, knee injuries, a mother of seven, with no level of fitness or personal training. To my great surprise I got round it in one piece and lived to tell the ‘tail,’ but I’m in no rush to repeat the ‘monkey business.’ At least I kept my girls happy.

Lastly, something to get you thinking. If you ever wondered what the secret to happiness was, scientists have now discovered it. Neuroscientists at UCL used the Happiness Project app and MRI scans of people’s brains to develop the following equation. Well, it’s beyond me, but here you go.

Jacqueline Curzon

PHOTO: LARA MINSKY PHOTOGRAPHY

(t)=w0+w1∑j=1tγt-jCRj+w2∑j=1tγt-jEVj+w3∑j=1tγt-jRPEj

Love

Jacqueline x

Meaning and Purpose Part 2

This article is part of a serialisation of the book ‘Go to Yourself’ transformation through Jewish wisdom and Psychology’. The author Aryeh Sampson is a psychotherapist based in North London and counsel’s online. It combines approaches from psychotherapy and Jewish wisdom to address many psychological issues that modern man is faced with. This includes overcoming anxiety, low self esteem, improving relationships and creating a greater sense of meaning and spirituality.

BY ARYEH SAMPSON

2(A) THOUGHT (CONTINUED)

Without becoming too morbid, reflecting on our mortality and the preciousness of life can also help us track down the things which mean the most to us. This sentiment is expressed in

Ecclesiastes: “It is better to go to a house of mourning than a wedding,” because the experience of going to a house of mourning causes a person to reflect on life and improve himself.

Irvin Yalom, an existential psychiatrist and writer, explained that thinking about death can cause terror. He described a phenomenon, known as “death anxiety,” where a person tries to cope with the inevitability of death by denial of its reality. He explains, however, that the recognition of death is a factor that helps transform our lives and can actually be the source of zest and creativity. Stated dramatically, he writes, “The idea of death saves us.” Let’s look at a few varied examples of how thinking about mortality has helped people.

Alfred Nobel

PHOTO: WIKIMEDIA.

Alfred Nobel, inventor of dynamite, was born in Stockholm, Sweden, in 1833. In 1888, he was astonished to read his own obituary, which was headlined, “The Merchant of Death Is Dead.”

Nobel’s brother, Ludvig, had actually died and the paper had confused the two brothers. The article disturbed Alfred Nobel greatly, causing him to think about the things that he had accomplished in his life and for which he would be remembered. This inspired him to make changes to his will. He established the

Nobel Prizes, leaving his fortune to be used to create a series of prizes for those who had conferred the “greatest benefit” upon mankind.

At the age of seventy–two, Kirk Douglas, one of Hollywood’s most famous actors, was in a helicopter crash. Two people died, and he sustained severe injuries. As he lay in the hospital recovering, he was haunted by the tragedy. It led him in a search to discover the meaning of life, why we are here,and the nature of God. In his search for the meaning of life, he discovered and learned more about his Jewish identity and Judaism

2(B) SPEECH

Expressing our thoughts is another powerful tool to help us deepen our sense of purpose and is one of the reasons that people seek psychotherapy. Therapy provides a non-critical environment in which to examine these issues and to explore many of the questions listed above, such as, “What are my hopes, dreams, and aspirations?”, “What is my life’s purpose?”, “How do I want to use my life to contribute to others?”

A person can also explore the experiences and messages he received when he was young which may be holding him back.

Gestalt Therapy, for example, uses an imagery technique to help people resolve negative experiences and messages from their past. Let’s look at how it helped Aaron resolve issues from his past.

Aaron imagined the time when he was being ridiculed by his father for wanting to become a social worker. He recalled the following conversation:

Aaron: I remember a time when I was fourteen and my father asked me what I wanted to do when I grew up.

Therapist: What happened then?

Aaron: I said, “I would like to become a social worker like my Aunt Judith.” And my father started laughing and saying, “You’ll never be able to support a family on her salary — I have not worked this hard for you to turn into a nobody!”

Therapist: How did you feel?

Aaron: I felt embarrassed and humiliated.

Therapist: What would you like to have said at the time?

Aaron: I feel too scared to say anything.

Therapist: Give it a try.

Aaron: I wish you would not laugh at me. It makes me feel so humiliated. What I really want to do is to help people and I have no interest in becoming a lawyer. I don’t care about having a lower standard of living; what is important to me is to use my life to make a difference to other people.

After Aaron expressed his upset, he went on, in therapy, to understand his father’s point of view and to forgive him. Aaron was subsequently able to find the internal strength to reach beyond his fear of ridicule. He decided to begin using his expertise as a lawyer to assist victims of abuse.

2(C) ACTION

In previous chapters, we examined the power of taking small steps forward to help us overcome resistance to change. Similarly, in expressing our drive for meaning, we can implement this strategy by creating a plan of action and appreciating that every act counts. The Talmud warns about the dangers of being overly ambitious, stating “He who grabs too much, grabs nothing.”

The Rambam explains that we should look at the world as balanced — half meritorious and half lacking merits — and on the verge of destruction, and that one positive action has the power to make the difference. There is a beautiful story in the Talmud that illustrates the profound value of simple actions that reflect our care for the world.

A man called Choni was walking on the road and saw another man planting a carob tree. Choni asked him, “How long will it take for this tree to bear fruit?” The man replied, “Seventy years.” Choni then asked him, “And do you think you will live another seventy years and eat the fruit of this tree?” The man answered, “Perhaps not. However, when I was born into this world, I found many carob trees planted by my father and grandfather. Just as they planted trees for me, I am planting trees for my children and grandchildren so they will be able to eat the fruit of these trees.”

By filling our days with good deeds, we enrich our lives with a deeper sense of meaning. When Abraham was approaching the end of his life, he was described as “coming with his days” (as opposed to “coming with the years of his life”), because each of his days was filled with good deeds.

A story is told about a rabbi who died at the age of fifty. When the family returned from the funeral, the eldest son said, “Our father had a long life.” Everyone was shocked, “How can you say that of a man who died so young?” they asked. “Because his life was full, he wrote many important books and touched many people,” he replied.

STAGE 3: TRANSFORMATION

In our desire to live a deeply meaningful life, we often encounter traits and habits that hold us back, such as lack of confidence, laziness, and procrastination. In the Transformation stage, we look at going beyond merely overcoming the influence of these traits to stopping their influence completely by transforming them.

In Aaron’s case, his fear of ridicule persisted even after he started helping victims of abuse. In his new work he was afraid of making mistakes and appearing inept. He started to train himself to gradually go beyond his fear of ridicule; he repeatedly took small steps forward to confront this fear. It took considerable time and effort, but this process slowly helped him to become more confident — until he had completely conquered his fear of ridicule.

We can use the same process of repeating positive acts to defeat any trait that is holding us back. When we succeed in our struggles and change our nature, we may also be able to use these experiences to help others with similar issues.

The psychiatrist Carl Jung wrote about this concept, which he called “the wounded healer.” The wounded healer is someone who has sought to heal his own wounds, and by so doing, has developed the compassion, wisdom, and strength to help others overcome theirs. He or she understands the pain of others, having also experienced it, and has become a gifted healer and a source of inspiration to those around them. We, too, become wounded healers by changing our character, and using our new capabilities to contribute more deeply to the lives of others.

If you are interested in viewing a webinar on Love, Communication and Marriage, or receiving a free download copy of Go to Yourself, email aryeh.sampson@gmail. com. He also has a YouTube channel, ‘Aryeh Sampson’ where he shares insights on a range of psychological issues. For more information about counseling view www. ascounsellinginnorthlondon.co.uk