Week 132

Edition 132

www.thecourier.es

Friday, August 30, 2013

BRIT AND RUN

By Alex Trelinski

A 28 year old woman has been arrested and charged with killing a British pedestrian in Torrevieja in a hit and run last February.

The Guardia Civil say that she had no driving license and was trying to cover up her tracks by selling her car after the accident.

The accused, a Spanish national, is said to have been driving a car she

owned when she knocked down 74­year­old Dennis Clouting who was crossing Calle Rodrigo on the La Siesta urbanisation on February 27th.

Mr.Clouting was rushed to Torrevieja hospital but died a few hours later from his injuries.

The woman is said to have left the victim lying on the tarmac and fled the scene, but police recog­ nised her vehicle some months later and tracked

her down. According to the Guardia Civil, the driver – identified only by her ini­ tials of S.P.G., tried to sell the car immediately after the accident to avoid being caught.

She has been charged with causing death by dan­ gerous driving, failure to provide assistance, and driving without a licence, and has been remanded in custody. The identity of the British victim has not been revealed.

JUST ADD PASTA

Continued on P13

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Are you a snapper? Do you have a great photo? Send it to design@thecourier.es and if we think it is good enough we will publish it as our Picture of the Week TELEPHONE

96 692 1003 679 096 309 965 99 66 66 E­MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon ­ Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Alex Trelinski CONSULTANT EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Writers Donna Gee Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes John McGregor

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Picture of the Week

JUNGLE DRUMS

Boardwalk through the pine forest to Playa de Rebollo PICTURE TAKEN BY DAVE MOORE OF LA MARINA

“LAUGHING STOCK” STRIKES AGAIN A local politician has sparked a British and Gibraltarian backlash after posting a mocked­up picture of a Spanish invasion of Gibraltar on Facebook. Callosa de Segura’s con­ troversial PP Mayor, Francisco Perez Trigueros has been called a ‘fool’ for uploading the image show­ ing soldiers marching through the British overseas territory and fighter jets sweeping over the Rock. The image also showed a Spanish flag fly­ ing over the British territory and an Osborne bull — the black silhouette that has become Spain’s unofficial national symbol — installed on the Rock.

Mr.Trigueros is no stranger to mak­ ing headlines, having made strong comments on Facebook during the recent World Swimming Championships in Barcelona, attacking those Catalans who booed the Spanish national anthem, and calling them a load of bulls—t. The PSOE opposition at the time said that he made the town

“a laughing stock”.

Ernest Romero told Mr Trigueros to “go to hell” on the website of a Gibraltar­based activist group which flagged up his use of the picture. And Robert Menez, urged the mayor to stop using Gibraltar as a smokescreen to deflect attention from Spain’s 4.7 mil­ lion unemployed, quipped: “He could be taken seriously by some. After all, if

he rounds up all the unemployed he could probably invade China.”

The Mayor in turn has said that it is crazy to suggest that the photo is depicting a military invasion of Gibraltar, adding that he is one of mil­ lions of Spaniards that simply wants to make sure that UN resolutions are implemented and that the Rock is peacefully returned to Spanish sover­ eignty.

The girl at the centre of abuse alle­ gations against the convicted pae­ dophile, Daniel Galvan, has run away from a children’s centre that she was staying at.

Galvan was set to appear before a Torrevieja judge yesterday (Thursday) to answer charges that he abused a

young girl in the city back in 2004. The girl’s parents brought charges after recognising Galvan when he appeared on television after a scandal erupted this month in Morocco over his case.

The hearing was suspended on Wednesday morning to a future undis­

closed date, since the teenager was not going to be around to give evi­ dence to the court. 65 year old Galvan is in Soto del Real prison near Madrid, having been arrested in Murcia after being incorrectly pardoned by the King of Morocco for a string of sex crimes against children in that country.

WANT A WINNING TICKET?

Riddle of runaway accuser

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS!

DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines?

What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap­

pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

Friday Thunder High 27° Low 25° Chance of rain 55% Monday Sunny High 29 Low 21° Chance of rain 2%

Tuesday Sunny High 28° Low 21° Chance of rain 9%

Saturday Sunny High 28° Low 20° Chance of rain 7% Wednesday Sunny High 28° Low 22° Chance of rain 8%

The Guardia Civil have arrested 2 members of a gang that were allegedly involved in a lottery scam known as “toco­ mocho”. One of the arrests was in Torrevieja with a 43 year old woman taken into cus­ tody, whilst a man was apprehended in the Toledo area.

The trick involves a vic­ tim being approached by a scammer who claims to have a winning lottery ticket, and for whatever reason, he or she cannot collect their winnings.

The scammer offers to sell the ticket for a lot less money than the prize value, and provides what appears to look like a list of winners pub­ lished in a newspaper.

When the victim tries to cash in the ticket, he or she finds that they’ve been sold a fake!

The last fraud is said to have happened last month in Rojales, with other scams taking place over the last year in Pilar de la Horadada, Dolores, and Almoradi, as well as around Murcia.

Sunday Sunny High 29° Low 21° Chance of rain 2% Thursday Partly cloudy High 28° Low 22° Chance of rain 22%

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Friday, August 30, 2013

TKO RETURNS AS RADIO TORREVIEJA CLOSES Popular Costa Blanca music radio station, TKO, returned to the local air­ waves this week, with an official launch today (Friday). The service on 91.9FM covers the coast between La Marina in the north, and the Mar Menor in the South, with inland cover­ age taking in Albatera, Elche, Crevilliente, Orihuela, the Rojales area, Torrevieja, and San Miguel de Salinas.

The station’s return was brought for­ ward, after Radio Torrevieja was forced to leave its 107.1 frequency due to inter­ ference issues with aircraft frequencies.

Station owner Barry Newlove said: ­ “We were ordered to permanently close down our 107.1 FM service on Monday morn­

ing, along with another radio station. The bad news meant that we took the oppor­ tunity to officially re­launch TKO on 91.9.

We had already been planning the return of TKO and had been broad­ casting tests on that frequency, but it meant an extremely hectic few days of being on and off air, until everything was put into place. I want to thank all our listeners and advertisers for their great patience this week, and it’s all systems go for TKO”.

TKO features the programming and presenters of Radio Torrevieja, along with future plans to expand the service still further, bringing a mixture of chart and new music, mixed in with classic pop tracks. The station’s website is tko.fm

RECORD HIGH FOR GUARDIA TOE CURLING

Spain’s biggest ever stash of marijuana, worth some 15 million Euros, has been uncov­ ered by the Guardia Civil in the Murcia region. Five men were arrested last week in Puerto Lumbreras, south of Lorca, for growing over 14 thou­ sand plants on a farm in Esparragal. The whole operation was con­ cealed within a farm that acted as a front for the drug growing factor.

The farm housed four

large greenhouses used for growing different vari­ eties of marijuana plants, and additionally had a dryer for the buds as well

as other kinds of machin­ ery and materials for the process­ ing of t h e

QUEASY RIDER A drunken naked man led cops on a merry bike chase of 25 kilometres on Sunday before being arrested in a field of sun­ flowers. The dramatic events in Utrera near Seville kicked off with reports of a nude rider on a scooter weaving around on a trunk road. Guardia units checked them out and saw the bare bottomed two­wheeler heading for the town of El Coronil where a local fiesta was being celebrated.

The “in the buff” rider had the “bare cheek” to ignore an order to stop and fled 'in a reckless manner', mounting pavements and endanger­ ing pedestrians. He launched into a high speed chase, which ended in a farcical fash­ ion after 25 kilometres, when the man abandoned his bike and tried to take refuge into a field of sunflowers. Cops found him in a drunken state, and badly scratched by the flowers, and promptly charged him with reckless driving as well as driving under the influence of alcohol.

drugs. The plants weighed around 3 tonnes and had to be packed in 115 boxes.

'Operation Puerto Clean' also saw the authorities seize cars, fertilizers, electrical gear, gen­ erators, and alarm systems as well as humidifiers and other equipment that allowed the marijuana plants to grow in the most optimum conditions in the greenhouses.

Of those arrested, 2 were Spanish, and the others were Moroccans, with all of them having addresses across the Murcia region.

A man has been fined more than £300 after swal­ lowing a HUMAN TOE at a Canadian bar.

The Sourtoe Cocktail is a tradition in Dawson City, where a shot of whisky is served with a human toe in the bottom of the glass.

The toe must touch the punter's lips as they drink, but they are not supposed to swallow it.

If you accidentally down the human body part, you face a fine ­ as happened to a customer at the Downtown

Hotel on Saturday night.

Terry Lee ­ the bar's "toe captain" ­ said the brave customer swallowed his drink including the toe, before putting $500 dollars on the table.

It's not the first time the toe has been swallowed, but it is thought to be the first time someone has ingested it deliberately.

The bar apparently has a "back up toe" so the tradition can continue, but Lee says he is hoping another will be donated.

Green with anger

Angry swimmers who use Torrevieja’s Acequion Beach have forced the local council to take action over the quality of the sea water, which has seen green algae float to the surface at the beach. Bathers protested in the area at the weekend, with some bags of green algae being thrown into nearby streets. The council ordered the Torrevieja salt company (the NCAST) to reduce the mate­ rial which is coming down a channel from the Salt Lake to the beach, and a new barrier was put in place on Tuesday.

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Friday, August 30, 2013

TEN HELD AFTER BLEACHED OUT SEVILLE SLAUGHTER

10 people were arrested after last week’s Seville shoot­out which saw a 7 year old girl killed by a bullet. The girl’s parents were slightly injured in the shooting. The National Police think a possible settling of scores led to the shooting, between other clans involved in drug trafficking,

especially one clan known as ‘Los Mariano’. The Police added that the fami­ ly had nothing to do with drugs, with the shooters admitting that they got the wrong house. Police have extended patrols in the area in case some retalia­ tion occurs from the other gang.

FLYING HIGH

British low­cost airline company, Jet2.com has chosen Alicante­Elche airport to open its first base outside the UK. Two Boeing air­ craft will be based at the airport, with the company saying that they are planning to boost their flights by some 60% over the win­ ter season.

Managing director, Ian Doubtfire, said that the company would be launching the new winter routes would take in Belfast and Glasgow. He added that around 300 direct and indirect jobs would be created over the next 2 years by the Jet2.com expansion.

HOME IMPROVEMENT

Five Moroccan drug deal­ ers who distributed cannabis around Spain, including the Murcia and Valencian regions, have been arrested in Malaga. 170 kilos of drugs were seized by the National Police, in addition to 5 cars with false bottoms, guns, and nearly 4 thousand Euros. The gang would dis­ tribute drugs to other European countries, and the drugs were specially packaged with bleach poured onto

plastic containers to try to stop them being sniffed out by police dogs.

BAD RECEPTION

GOING UP?

A 51 year old Valencia man has died after getting stuck in a lift in his block of flats in the city. He was trapped for around three hours, and he suffered from claustrophobia and a panic Brico Depot, which already has stores in Cartagena and Crevillente, is coming to attack, which led to a heart He continually Torrevieja. The D.I.Y. chain, which is part of the Kingfisher Group, will be based off the attack.

N332, with the council re­classifying some a 32 thousand square metre site so that the pressed the emergency but­ ton, but nobody responded. store can be located there.

Emergency workers were eventually called in, and they spotted a motionless body through the glass door, which they could not open.

Firemen were brought in to smash the door down, and they found the unconscious man lying next to his Labrador dog. He had left a neighbour’s home and it is

A 23 year old man died after falling from a balcony whilst trying to find a good Wi­Fi signal on his mobile phone. The victim is said to have slipped and bumped into the railings and then fall­ en six metres from the sec­ ond floor of a block in Beniaján in Murcia.

Police say he appeared to be leaning over the edge to trace a signal for his phone, which had limited cover inside the flat. According to his father, he returned home after a drinking session, and in trying for better Wi­Fi reception, he died instantly when he hit the ground.

believed he then went to his flat to take his dog for a walk.

The neighbours expressed their anger that the emergency bell is not connected to a central sys­ tem, but just rings in the building. If there is no one around then anyone could be trapped inside for hours.

This was the second time that the man had been trapped in the lift, and that occasion proved to be fatal.

FISHERMAN’S Unhealthy wait More dinero FRIEND - NOT

The fishermen are back on the Orihuela Costa, but they’re not filling their nets with the fruit of the sea. Two homes around the Playa Flamenca area have seen crooks reel in catches of items through open windows. The thieves have used the old trick of using poles with hooks to remove items like keys from tables, and then opening up the front or side door, and helping themselves to a harvest of riches.

The Orihuela Costa Neighbourhood Watch has reminded tourists and local people alike to use common sense, and never to leave any valuable items on view to potential bur­ glars. The group also advise anybody that has been robbed not to touch anything but to call the police instead on 112, as they will organise a detail sweep of the area.

VINES HIT

Average Spanish hospital waiting lists have gone up by a third in just six months, according to the Ministry of Health.

For non­urgent surgery – considered to be where the patient's life is not in danger and a delay will not cause irre­ versible damage – the wait has gone from 76 to 100 days since February, with the biggest backlogs seen in Traumatology and Neurosurgery.

This is the longest waiting list since records began in 2004, when the average time­lapse prior to surgery was 78 days.

Latest figures from the Ministry show that a total of 571,400 people are waiting for an operation, and 16.5 % of those have been on the list for six months or more.

Flagged down

Costa Blanca vineyards were affected by the week’s heavy rain, with some of the grapes being hit just ahead Guardamar’s Marina de las Dunas beach has had its blue of the harvest. A lot of the fruit and vegetable growers had already picked their crops ahead of the autumn, flag removed because of an inadequate lifeguard service. though some of the future cherry crops may have been The move is provisional and the blue flag could be re­instat­ ed if normal service is resumed. badly affected.

Foreign tourists who visited the Costa Blanca and the Valencian region in the first seven months of this year have spent 2,894 million Euros, which is 8.8% more than in the same period of 2012, according to the Tourism Expenditure Survey (Egatur).

The average spend per tourist per day rose by 1.8%, reaching 75 euros, according to the report.

BUSY RADAR

The latest speeding campaign has seen over a thousand drivers nabbed by radar traps across Alicante Province. The national clampdown run by the DGT saw 35 thousand motorists face the music over breaking speed limits in the week long campaign that finished last Sunday.

Not expecting

The Dutch volleyball player, Ingrid Visser, was not preg­ nant when she was killed along with her partner, Lodewijk Severein, in Molina de Segura, Murcia in May. Despite rumours that she was expecting a child, forensic tests con­ firmed that she was not pregnant.

The couple went missing when they arrived in the area, and a week later their bodies were found buried on a farm outside Murcia City. National Police arrested Juan Basin and two Romanians for their alleged involvement in the double murder.

Friday, August 30, 2013

BULLS SPARED BUT NOT FROM LIVE TV

A bullfighter has been hit by a 3 thousand Euro fine for refusing to kill two bulls at an event in Andalusia. The bullfighter, 'El Remonta', was hit with the fine after failing to finish off two so­called novillos — or second­ grade bulls — at the Cogollos de Guadix event in Andalusia.

The event had begun badly with two novice bullfighters injured. One, Emilio Molina, suffered a fractured wrist while also taking a general battering. His companion, Jiménez López, came off with a fractured elbow and a dislocated shoulder. El Remontada then declared himself unwell, nauseous and unfit for bullfighting. As a result he will be fined just over 3 thousand Euros by the bullfighting authorities. There was criticism from some of the sport’s follow­ ers that inexperienced bullfighters were being used against higher grade bulls, whilst an expert added the El Remontada was being unfairly scapegoated and that the breeder of the bulls ought to be investigated.

Meanwhile this Sunday, fans of the contro­ versial sport will be able to watch it live on

Spanish public TV, as the bullfights from Merida are televised by TVE from 7pm. This is only the second such event on Spanish public television in six years, and the first since last year's transmission from Valladolid.

And like last year's bullfighting, the costs are minimal for TVE, which hammered out an agreement with bullfighters, breeders and the Merida arena which will see it only pay­ ing transmission costs. The decision to show the event live is part of a new TVE policy to show the occasional bullfight — but only when the price is right.

Bullfights, or corridas, first disappeared from free­to­air television in Spain after the national broadcaster said it was inappropri­ ate to transmit them during children's view­ ing hours when they generally occurred.

Three years ago the events were then banned by TVE for animal cruelty reasons, but after a change in government, TVE changed its policy in 2012, and decided it would screen a small number of events a year.

A driver was clocked at being five times over the alcohol limit was arrest­ ed in Guardamar on Saturday. Police, who were carrying out some routine patrols and spotted him driving in the wrong direction. Meanwhile in the San Miguel de Salinas area, police have

nabbed a man for drink­driving for the second time in as many months. The 54 year old Spaniard could barely stand after he was collared. He had been reported for erratic driving hav­ ing hit a stationary car in the Blue Lagoon.

Nearly 1.7 billion euros in pesetas are still stashed in houses throughout the country, according to the Bank of Spain. Some 874 million euros' worth of the old currency, which was phased out in early 2002, is in notes and 807 million in coins.

Last year alone, the Bank of Spain changed 16 million euros – 2,662 million pesetas – and in July this year, two million euros were handed out in exchange for 333 million of the former currency. Around 45 per cent of pesetas as yet unchanged will never be handed in, since they are being kept by

collectors, small notes or coins held by Spaniards as 'souvenirs', or are deteriorated or out of the country – many are believed to be in purses and wallets of one­time tourists to Spain who kept them as a collector's item due to their minimal value if exchanged, and some hang onto their coins and notes believ­ ing that one day they may be worth a lot more money than their face value.

The very last day upon which pesetas can be exchanged is New Year's Eve in 2020, the day before the 19th anniversary of the introduction of the euro to Spain.

TWO FOR THE ROAD

MUCHO PESETAS

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Friday, August 30, 2013

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Heads on the block OH dear, William Hague is now waving his fist at Spanish Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy!

With all the dodgy deals (allegedly) that Mariano is facing, I know who I would rather have on my side, in a bit of a skirmish.

Oh dear, Oh dear! Now who's been telling fibs? Dropping con­ crete blocks into the sea to devel­ op a reef to encourage sea­life. No you haven't. You have been drop­ ping concrete blocks into the sea, to act as a foundation for a sea wall

The REAL meaning of your proxy vote

to extend the harbour, and now the Spanish have rumbled you.

Oh dear! Oh dear! Oh! Members of the Gibraltarian constabulary are now having to sign off sick, to take counselling, because motorists are shouting out at them, as they wait to cross the bor­ der.

What would Sergeant George Dixon (pictured right) have thought of it all?

Mind how you go.

ROBERT WALFORD BARNES.

DONNA’S DRIVEL IS JUST TATTOO MUCH I READ with some amusement and irritation, the article by Donna Gee on tattoos in last week’s Courier.

Alas the article is littered with mistakes (the irritation) and the woman can't even spell my name correctly (amuse­ ment).

I think it would be prudent for people who write for your publication to do their research and homework on the sub­ ject matter of their articles; otherwise it makes them look not only ill­informed and ignorant, but also casts the editors of such publications in a bad light.

Considering the resources of the internet being at her dis­ posal, I am surprised at the number of mistakes she has committed. I have NEVER been in any legal disputes with David Beckham over his tattoos, rather his sponsors who were intending to use the images without proper legal con­ sent. Also I am not a ''legalised sadist'' as she put it, no more so than a dentist or beautician. I could be offended at that comment but I realise that she is just very very ignorant and stupid.

It's funny, though, that when it comes to one of her own relatives being tattooed, then she holds back somewhat on the scorn and mirth because it has "personal" motivation for her granddaughter. Her granddaughter's tattoo is bloody awful. It looks like it has been drawn by a child. The kind of image a four­year­old would bring home from school and you would stick onto the fridge. But it's OK because its on her granddaughter.

These kind of tattoos are what I dub the "Lladro" tattoos.

If you knew anything about art then you would understand what I am saying. (Expensive but cheap, tacky nasty kitsch that is painful to look at).

She now says that she is going to get tattooed herself as part of a family bet. The words Dumb and Dumber spring to mind. People choose to be tattooed for many reasons.

Whatever the reasons the fact remains that we have that choice in the first place. It's the sign of living in a free world which is a good thing. I am not sure what kind of world it would be if people like Donna Gee had their way. But they say that everyone has an opinion and of course she is enti­ tled to hers.

What worries me about opinions like Donna's where she is ready to pour her scorn at an instant and be judgmental about people and things of which she knows very little,; where does she stand on things like race and religion? I don't think I want to know as I bet she wouldn't have the courage of her convictions to put it into print If I were you Mr Editor, I think from now on you should vet Donna's articles as she may end up dropping you in the sh** so to speak, but of course this is just my opinion.

LOUIS MOLLOY, Manchester l DONNA’S REPLY IS ON PAGE 7

HERE we go again.Yes it's time for the AGM ­ another year another farce. It’s amaz­ ing how many people just don't understand the impor­ tance of proxy voting.

In the Urbanisation where I live the President has ‘farmed’ over 40 votes, which he will use for his own gains.

You should not give your proxy to anyone before you read the Agenda because this could cost you dearly.

There could be proposals to increase the President’s retainer or Community Fees, or for him to spend what he pleases on silly projects.

Remember, the Community should be run as a business; in other words spending has to be controlled.

When you give your Proxy you are actually giving the holder Power Of Attorney to represent, speak on your behalf, and vote for you. So I would suggest when you are giving your Proxy, include a list from the Agenda of your YES and NO Preferences.

The holder is then obliged by law to implement your instructions.

Failure to present your Proxy as I have shown you will not be a vote for Democracy but a vote Democratic Dictatorship.

GEORGE DAVIS (address supplied)

Cover­girl Veronica is the tops

Living in Spain is bad for my health I AM not a pensioner, but... l Have lived here for over two years. l Own my own property. l Am on the Padron l Have Residencia and NIE l Have a SIP Card.

However, when I went to Cabo Roig Health Centre last week as

I was feeling unwell, I was told I needed an X­Ray, but I must go privately at a cost of €105 as my card does not cover this.

What is going on and what does my SIP card cover?

PETER (full name supplied), Cabo Roig

The Courier does not necessarily agree with the views expressed on this Page

THE other day we had a problem on Calle Columbret­ es with a broken sewage manhole cover.

At 10.00am I rang Veronica at Playa Flamenca Town Hall to report and she promised to contact Aguagest who were respon­ sible for repairs. By 12.01 we had installed a brand new cover fully fitted! It does not get better than this.

RICHARD CRITCHLEY Pinada Golf 1

DON’T FORGET, WE NEED YOUR DETAILS Letters and emails will only be considered for publication if an address and contact number are provided to confirm authenticity

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Friday, August 30, 2013

FOR BETTER OR NORSE!

Oh hippy day! How Dr Trond gave my back a leg up

THE entrance door to Dr Trond Vinje’s surgery was locked.

But the lights twinkling inside told me he wasn’t far away. And I was, after all, ten min­ utes early for my appointment .

I had come to Gran Alacant to find out more about a procedure developed by the Norwegian medic which restores body sym­ metry and in doing so, relieves all sorts of problems from lower back and muscular pain to headaches and migraine.

As I stood there I wondered if I had made the right decision in agreeing to undergo Dr Trond’s revolutionary ’ReBoSy’ (Restoring Body Symmetry) treatment. But moments later the white­haired Scandinavian was standing next to me.

“You are early. I went for a coffee,’’ he said in excellent English, unlocking the entrance and ushering me into the not­particu­ larly­inviting surgery.

I was alone with a stranger, yet I felt total­ ly unthreatened. The doctor was very much what I had expected, oozing the eccentricity of a man dedicated to spreading his gospel of symmetry to the world.

Dr Trond – a qualified physician in both Norway and Spain ­ has spent eight years seeking the answer to instability of the pelvis, a condition he says affects 60 per cent of women and 30 per cent of men.

“I believe this problem occurs because we humans are not constructed well enough or strong enough by nature,’’ he reasoned as a spirit level confirmed my membership of dis­ torted humanity.

“Most people are not aware their hips are standing at different positions’’.

Unbalanced body symmetry often means one leg being shorter than the other. In my

Caught on the hop: Target symmetry case, by nearly an inch.

“One of your problems is that your left hip is two centimetres lower than the right,’’ was Dr Trond’s explanation for the neck and back pains which have been increasingly affecting my mobility and comfort over the last few years.

“This has given you scoliosis ­ a slightly curved spine ­ which is responsible for shoul­ der and neck pain or headaches.’’

Dr Trond, who has homes in both Norway and Spain, says he has used ReBoSy on 100 Norwegians and that virtually all of them are delighted at the results.

My own treatment consisted of an energy

You’re a long way from Saint Louis, Mr Molloy THE point of my article about David q Beckham in last week’s Courier was to say that the football Adonis’s body looks a mess, thanks to the tattoo of tat­ toos plastered all over it.

However, the wording of my rant clearly got under the skin of the artist whose needles supplied the permanent make­up that Becks and other foot­ ballers find such a fashionable part of 21st­century culture.

To me, Louis Molloy’s work on Becks’ neck is a monstrosity ­ an opinion for which the miffed tattooist dismisses as ignorant, stupid and dumb (see Letters, Page 6).

He even has the audacity to suggest I might well have extreme views on race and religion.

Apart from bordering on defamation, such an unsubstantiated and untrue statement demonstrates why Mr Molloy (pictured) should stick to needle work.

While I admit I am no expert on the aesthetic quality of tattoos, I am perfect­ ly entitled to say I dislike Beckham’s bodily adornments. Equally, Louis is

entitled to say that my 22­year­old granddaughter’s tattoo in memory of her late sister is ‘’bloody awful’’.

Well, Mr Molloy, In my ignorance and stupidity I actually think the back of Becks’ neck looks worse than ‘’bloody awful’’. It’s a hideous sight.

But what do I know about tattoos?

Probably about as much as Mr Molloy knows about journalism, ­ which appears to be less than nothing.

I certainly would not dream of calling Louis ignorant and stupid ­ and by mak­ ing those wild assumptions about my political views, he aligns himself with blind bigotry.

As for the mis­spelling of his name, I suggest he takes that matter up with the Daily Mail, whose website provided me with the information.

However, I do concede that describing tattooists as legalised sadists was over the top.

I should have focused more on the people who provide Mr Molloy and his colleagues with their livelihood.

Over to you, masochists...

lamp being placed on my midriff for around half an hour, a single acupuncture needle being inserted painlessly into each hand – and the application for a few seconds of thumb pressure to a highly sensitive point on my right foot.

“To make the body symmetrical we use PEME treatment plus acupressure at trigger points on the legs,’’ explained Dr Trond.

“PEME means Pulsating Electrical Magnetic Energy – it must be used to pre­ prepare the body for treatment or else it will not work effectively enough. In addition we put two needles in your hands because of your general pain’’.

Dr Trond claims to have evolved the ReBoSy process in Oslo during eight years of research.

“It developed through testing, testing and more testing until we reached perfection,’’ he said, “and today we are able to correct (and take away scoliosis) up to 2.5 cm difference between right and left hip ­ with a success rate of over 90% after only one treatment.’’

The doctor is convinced his remedy will revolutionise medicine and enable many people with ongoing back problems to avoid surgery. Hopefully so, though I strongly sus­ pect there are other clinicians out there per­ forming similar ‘levelling off’ procedures on hobbling headaches like myself.

For 48 hours or so I was convinced Dr Trond had cracked the problem once and for all … even if I could not fathom out how an energy lamp, two needles and pressure on my foot could raise (or lower) one of my hips by nearly an inch.

Certainly, I spent the next two or three days relatively free of pain. But in the two weeks since my visit to Dr Trond’s surgery, much of the discomfort I was experiencing seems to have returned.

Dr Trond’s 90 per cent success rate may well be accurate…but either I’m in the other 10 per cent or I need more treatment.

So it looks like you’ll have to wave that Magic Trond again, doctor – because Norway is my backache cured!

8

Friday, August 30, 2013

Make a penny by helping animals

Amy and Halle under the gavel

The APAH animal rescue charity is barking and meowing for your unwanted items that they can sell off at a charity auction next month. The Pilar de la Horardada­based group are staging the event at Iceland’s San Javier store on Saturday September 21st from 1pm in the car park.

Unwanted gifts, raffle prizes, or impulse buys that you have never used can be donated for auction, with 15% of the price of the item being returned to the donator.

You can drop in your items at the Iceland store or the APAH charity shops in Pilar de la Horadada and San Miguel de Salinas before the auction day. For more infor­ mation call 630422563 or 968566370

Rockers celebrate Afghan heroes

It’s going to be a special 4th birthday this Tuesday for the Afghan Heroes charity with a show at the Restaurante Los Rosales, Guardamar. There’ll be entertainment celebrating the heroes of Rock n’Roll from the ever popular Woody and The Peckers, along with a special raffle for the charity.

Jax Lawson will be co­ ordinating the raffle for the Afghan Heroes which was started in September 2009 by seven mothers who all lost their sons in just two days of fighting in Afghanistan. The charity has gone from strength to strength and has recently opened two of the planned ten rehab centres that they have been planning for the last four years.

Fans of the late singer, Amy Winehouse, and Bond girl, Halle Berry, have a chance to pick up some special memorabilia at an event in San Fulgencio on Sunday September 8th.

An auction of two signed and authenticated photos will take place after a special football match between a San Fulgencio Select Team and a Local Police XI. All money raised on the day will go to AECC Contra el Cancer and CF San Fulgencio. If you fancy putting on your football

boots, then the San Fulgencio team is looking for play­ ers, and you can sign up at the Zodiac Bar on the La Marina Urbanisation or the Power Bar in San Fulgencio village.

The game will kick off at 11.00am, and admission will be 3 Euros, with a half­time raffle, followed by an after­ match giant Paella for 300 people, costing 2 Euros each. The auction for the signed star photos will then follow after the Paella has been eaten up!

Neighbourhood watches hondon carnival

Tickets are 10 Euros for show and meal and are now on sale from Restaurante Los Rosales on the CV895, Guardamar; Cards and More, La Marina; The Card Place at Benimar and Punta Prima; The Post Box, Dona Pepa; and The Hire Centre, San Luis in Torrevieja. You can also book your tickets via www.lrshows.com or phone: ­ 697501992.

Hondón de los Frailes was a splash of colour with last weekend’s village carnival, which was a real fun event with lots of music and dancing.

Carmen Miranda and her Associates were understandably busy handing out wine from Carmen’s Cantina with sweets and toys being eagerly accepted by the children.

The Cantina was made and deco­ rated by Steve, one of the co­ordina­ tors of Neighbourhood Watch.

Richard, Lead Co­ordinator said “We thoroughly enjoy taking part and it is a great opportunity for NHW to be involved in this very Spanish parade and advertise the Association. For details of a variety of security informa­ tion and a Branch near you – go to http://www.nhwinspain.com “ Richard also thanked the Campoverde Theatre Group for their assistance and wished them well with their production in September.

All aboard for a great prize In the swing at Las Colinas

A fabulous 7 day Cruise around the Med could be yours, if you buy a raffle ticket as part of a Charity Fun Day for the Torrevieja Costa Lions Club.

Comaskey Properties and Spanish Solutions are hosting the event at their new joint La Zenia offices this Friday (September 6th), starting at 11.00am.

A big BBQ is lined up along with a bar and traditional ice cream van for children of all ages. Music and entertain­ ment will come from Paul Cullen, Sunflower Valley, JB Brass and Juan Ange.

The Prize Draw will feature over 20 prizes with the star attraction from Worldwide Horizons of La Zenia, which is a week­long cruise for 2 people travelling from Malaga to Sardinia, Malta and Sicily. Tickets can be bought in advance from Lions members plus the La Zenia offices of Spanish Solutions and IBEX Insurance.

The Fun Day will be staged on the terrace outside the Comaskey/Spanish Solutions new offices, which can be found at the roundabout between the N332 and Zenia Boulevard on Calle Malaquita 1, Bajo, La Zenia. All pro­ ceeds will go to the Lions Club who are currently raising funds for ALPE, the educational centre for handicapped children and young adults in Torrevieja.

Torregolf.EU members were back at the Las Colinas course for the second time in a matter of weeks, but despite the excellent conditions, only 7 of the players managed to score more than 30 points in the Stableford Competition .

The Category winners were Kevin Edwards and Brian Coombes. The club are back at the Vistabella course at Entre Naranjos a week on Saturday (September 7th) and new members are more than welcome. Just call David Winder on 626 774 157 or E­mail:­ davidwinder.torregolf@gmail.com

IN THE RIGHT SPIRIT

Mediums and meetings are going to be order of the day for a brand new Spiritual Centre that’s going to start in Torrevieja at the end of September.

It’s going to be based in the function room of Sacko’s Bar, El Limonar, with different guest mediums popping in every week to the Rainbow Centre for Spiritual Awareness, which will open for business with a special service on Sunday September 29th.

The Rev.Barbara Almond will lead a Service of Dedication at 11.00 and then on Wednesday October 2nd, she will take charge of an Evening of Mediumship. Barbara has built up a reputation as a popular medium and is the Vice Chairman of the Corinthian Church and Healing Association.

ELVIS WAS IN THE BUILDING Elvis Presley was very much alive and well, and raising 800 Euros in a charity event organised by the Quesada Spiritualist Church.

Martin Dean donned the costume of the King for a special night at the El Alto La Dolores restaurant in Guardamar, with Church funds and other local charities benefiting from an enjoyable evening watched by a sell­out audience.

The next fund­raising night at El Alto La Dolores will be on Wednesday September 11th, with the return of West End singer, Peter Saul, along with local comedian, Justin Sane, who will also be performing his Elton John tribute act.

Tickets are priced at just 10 euros, and include a meal.

They are available from Restaurante El Alto La Dolores; The Post Room Benijófar; and The Card Place Benimar. Or you can make a phone booking after this coming Tuesday (September 3rd) on 692 866 536.

Friday, August 30, 2013

9

10

Friday, August 30, 2013

BRANDY WITH BRANDO

The other evening I was approached by a stranger in the pub. 'Can I buy you a drink?' he asked.

'Yes, please buy him a drink,' interjected Dave the barman. 'My takings are down tonight.'

'Forget it,' I said to the stranger. 'I'm not feeling par­ ticularly sociable.'

'Ignore him,' said Dave the barman. 'Grumpy Dave has been watching too many Marlon Brando films. He feels mean, moody and insignificant.'

'Magnificent, Dave, not insignificant!' I corrected him.

'The late, lamented Mr Brando was a deeply charis­ matic figure, adored by mil­ lions.'

'I'm fully aware of that,' said Dave the barman. 'I meant that YOU are insignifi­ cant.'

I stared hard at the stranger. 'Hang on a minute.

I know you. You're the son I never see these days because I'm always in the pub. You caught me out last October when I thought you were a stranger. I wrote

about it in The Courier, remember? Well, my mind's a lot sharper these days, so hello again, my boy.' And I flung my arms around my lad.

The recipient of my hug pulled away and assumed a puzzled expression. 'But I'm not your son. I AM a stranger.

And, because of your inap­ propriate embrace, I with­ draw my offer to buy you a drink.'

'Sorry,' I said sheepishly.

'At this moment I wish the ground would open up and swallow me.'

'Steady on,' said Dave the barman. 'The pub is not insured for subsidence.'

I glared at mein host.

'Considering the amount of water which sloshes around in your leaky beer pipes, a large hole appearing in your cellar floor is a distinct possi­ bility.'

Dave the barman turned red but not from embarrass­ ment or agitation. He rarely showed discomfort or dis­ pleasure apart from con­ stantly whingeing over his poor pub takings. However,

there was no getting away make it two bottles, then? I from the fact that on this have a one­for­two (!) offer occasion Dave the barman on this week.' had definitely turned red.

What had happened was this: Daft Barry had walked into the pub with an open tin of tomato soup, tripped over Ol' Red Eyes' overcoat, which was in a heap on the floor, and accidentally hurled the can's entire contents over Dave the barman.

Daft Barry also turned red but with embarrassment and agitation. 'Shouldn't Ol' Red Eyes' coat have been hang­ ing from a peg?' he splut­ tered.

'That would have been rather difficult,' I explained, 'considering that Ol' Red Eyes is still wearing the gar­ ment. The poor fellow likes to be swaddled when he's asleep on the floor.'

Dave the barman disap­ peared into the back to repair his red face and change his stained shirt.

Returning minutes later, he said: 'Might I suggest that Marlon Brando and The Stranger get acquainted over a glass of brandy? Shall I

''Hold it!' yelled Indoor Lou who leaped up onto a table.

'Might I have your attention please? As the only sane person in this establish­ ment, and before I go totally I crazy, need to know why Daft Barry was carry­ ing around an open tin of tomato soup.'

What had happened was this: Daft Barry's mother had left her son the afore­ mentioned soup for his tea.

But b e c a u s e S o c i a l Services did not allow any sharp instru­ ments in their house, Barry had

taken the can to his local hardware merchant to open it for him.

Daft Barry had been on his way back home when he thought he'd pop into the pub to see what was going on.

Unfortunately, what he had failed to see was the over­ coated Ol' Red Eyes asleep on the floor.

Anyway, back to the main event of Me and The Stranger . . .

I ordered two pints of ale but Dave the barman was in insistent mood and he pro­ duced two bottles of brandy, a plate of sandwiches ­­ and an invoice.

I handed it all back and told Dave the barman to go present his bill to some other gullible schmuck. Before going home, I told The Stranger that the next time we met he would no longer be a stranger.

At which point Ol' Red Eyes woke up. Dave the bar­ man thrust the invoice into his hand and said: 'You can pay for the brandy and sand­ wiches. The tomato soup is on me.'

11

Friday, August 30, 2013

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH Spanish 86 Welcome back, this week we are going to do some more revision, I hope you´re taking your copy of the courier to the pool or beach or just lounging around with it, enjoying the sto­ ries and also learning a bit of Spanish with me. It´s always good advice to check your knowledge which is why I do lots of revision lessons, you can see where you may need more revision as well as which areas you are confident in. Firstly though I had a message from a reader who has only just found my column and is looking through the back issues of The Courier to catch up to where she needs to learn, don´t forget past issues are available on the website just by click­ ing on my name, they can then be copied and pasted to form part of your learning. Remember all the Spanish I know comes from me teaching myself and speaking to Spanish people to help me learn. Lessons are very important for teaching, especially pronounciation and my lessons are meant as an extra to lessons not a replacement, unless you are very lucky like I was and have some very helpful friends.

As we are on lesson 86 now I thought I would give you a list of past lessons that can be found on the website, if you have any problems finding them feel free to send me an e­ mail via The Courier. Lesson 1: THE and A, 2: pronouncia­ tion, 3: days, months seasons, 4: Numbers to 60, time, morn­ ing, etc. 5: greetings, 6: revision, 7: stressing words, 8: times of day/weeks, etc, 9: general words and colours, 10: START­ ING VERBS regular endings, 11: ER and IR verb endings 12: SER, 13: ESTAR 14: revision, 15: HAY, 16: TENER 17: VENIR, 18: IR 19: revision, 20: HACER, 21: revision weeks 1­10, 22: revision weeks 11­ 20, 23, opposites and this, these, that, those, 24: my, your, his, hers, their, our, 25: PRESENT PARTICIPLE ­ing endings regular, 26 –ing end­ ings irregular, 27, word definitions in English grammar, 28: POR 29: PARA 30: it, me you him her them us, 31, 32, 33: stem changing VERBS 34: revision, 35: Answers 36: QUER­ ER 37: general notes for learning, 38 GUSTAR etc. 39: com­ parisons, 40: superlatives, 41, 42: stem changing VERBS, 43,44,45 adjectives.

de ……………. mejores compañeros que tengo You are one of the best workmates I have. todos ……………días de este mes me ……….. levantado a las 6.oo am Every day this month I have got up at 6am. mi amiga Julia ………. alta, delgada y ……………… ojos azules my friend Julia is tall, thin and has blue eyes. Cuando tengo tiempo libre … ………….gusta …………………. When I have free time I like to dance, Este regalo es………. Pablo ……….. su cumpleaños This present is for Paul for his birthday, Mis amigos ………….de Madrid, pero ahora ………. aquí My friends are from Madrid but now they are here, Me ………… . mucho tus zapatos nuevos I like your new shoes a lot

I will continue with the list next week. Let´s get on with the revision, there´s a bit of lots of the above and things from weeks 46 to 85, so let´s get going: First we are going to start by putting the verb in brackets into the Conditional tense, remember that is the tense in English where we use ´would´: Ellas no (saber) decírtelo – sabrían, Este billete no (valer) nada en diez años – valdría, ¿tu (querer) una gran boda? – querrías, Yo no (hacer) el desayuno para ti – haría, Next fill in the blanks, the sentence is given in English: El … … de mi madre es mi tío The brother of my mother is my uncle. hace …….. frío que no quiero salir de casa It is so very cold I don´t want to leave the house, Mi amiga Racheal ……………….. 23 años y …………. en España . My friend Racheal is 23 years old and lives in Spain, Tú ………… uno

Now I am going to write some whole sentences in English for you to translate into Spanish, take your time and as you write in Spanish try and say the words out loud.

The shops are far from our house but I still walk there because I don´t like to go on the bus. “do you have any friends in other countries?” “yes I have loads”, When our team doesn´t win, we get sad. I like to take a walk on the beach in the evening, Tell me the truth! Do you like cats?

They go a lot further, Is anyone there? No, there is no­one, I am going to give him some water, tomorrow I am going to wake up at seven o´clock and go to work at eight, my leg hurts, You should see that film, it´s very good, I live in Spain, in a big house with my three sons and two daughters, I love Spain.

I hope you found most of those quite straightforward, of course some are easier than others so take your time and try your best. Next week you will see where, if anywhere you need to brush up on your knowledge when we check the answers.

Have a great week, keep working on improving however you find it easiest. There are many resources available for not only studying Spanish but also techniques to make studying more enjoyable and interesting. Whatever happens, don´t stop learning, have a great week.

12

Friday, August 30, 2013

UNIVERSE WILL REVENGE EVIL DOG KILLERS A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about a video someone had sent me, requesting help to find five boys who killed a dog.

From the start of this article, I want to make it totally clear, that the following account is extremely distressing, so I understand if some of you choose to turn the page now.

Watching the video was the most distressing viewing of my entire life. It is believed the incident took place in Jordan. It shows five young boys catching a small dog and the screams of the poor animal are haunting and that is even before they have committed their final despicable act. As the dog tries to escape, he is covered in petrol and then set alight.

The worst part for me is when the dog finally realises, after about three or four seconds, that he is on fire. After about one minute, the dog falls to the floor in silence, after the cruellest of deaths.

The five boys in the video are speaking an Arabic dialect, known as "Shami". In the video, they talk about making sure they do not burn down the orphanage or shelter, which may be the building they live in. The video was posted on a Facebook group in January 2011 and later removed.

Someone found the video and posted it on YouTube, requesting that people try and find the evil, mindless morons who did this. These boys need to be found and brought to justice and with enough exposure, I truly believe this can happen. My worry is how many other animals have they killed in the last two and a half years. I have signed the peti­ tion and I please urge you to do the same. You can log onto www.change.org and type in the search box "Shami dog".

You can then add your signature.

My life is dogs. Like you, if I were to write a million words, I can never express my undying passion for these wonderful animals. They saved my life and their loyalty and love is unri­ valled in this universe. As I write this article, my seven dogs are all in my office, fast asleep, after a long walk in the moun­ tains this morning. They are my family and I so need them in my life. My addiction is dogs and when I am surrounded by them I could not be happier. There is a saying in this world, which is ­ "What goes around comes around", and it is some­ thing I totally believe in. The Universe has a way, no matter what, of catching up with you and giving you back what you give to this world. And whether it is now or in several years time, the Universe will pay these evil boys a visit and share with them the misery they executed on that poor little dog.

Please sign the petition. That way justice can be served

twice, once by us and then from above.

I am available for consultations throughout the Costa Blanca region, if you are having problems with your furry best friend. To book a consultation you can E­mail me at peter@thedogyouneed.com and I will contact you straight away. We have also set up an animal charity, where we help the most severely abused and injured animals in Spain. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this special cause you can do by PayPal, where the account details are peter@thedogyouneed.com or to our Nat West charity account, where the sort code is 60­16­03 and the account number is 73754900. Even one Euro will help, so please, please, try and support us. There is so much work we need to do and we need support. Thank you.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT? PEDRO & PABLO came into our care back in Nov 12.

They were found in the countryside with an older male Podenco, Percy. Pedro and Pablo were thin and covered in ticks.They are still awaiting a new home and are now almost 18 months old, very cheeky and they love to play. The boys are fully vaccinated, micro chipped and castrated.

For more info please call 966 710 047, email info@satanimalrescue.com or you can visit our website www.satanimalrescue.com or follow us on facebook.

Pedro and Pablo Cleo is around 8 months old and she has already given birth to 2 kittens who are also ready for homes. Cleo is very affectionate and des­ perate for a home. Call: 645 469 253 www.petsinspain.com Cleo

HELP ­ Is there anyone out there that could love a Staffordshire Bull Terrier, She is a lovely girl with a lovely nature. Left at the vets, owner can no longer look after her. You do need a license for this type of dog, but they are not difficult to get. Contact 616655789 for more details www.catsndogsaid.com

Alfie is about 1 year old and loves to be made a fuss of.

He is a small dog who is very friendly and affectionate with others. He would make someone an ideal pet that has very little space. The lady who found him said he loves sitting on laps and loves chil­ dren.

Please contact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es

Chico is a young Labrador who was found wandering we think he is about a year old, he is such a lovely dog really well behaved and loves to please very good with other dogs he would make a fantastic pet. For more info please call 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.ani­ malcharity@gmail.com

Rusty born approx Jan 2011 is a medium sized boy, he was found wandering in a very bad state, he is a lovely dog he likes everyone, dogs and even cats too. For more info please call the PEPA help desk on 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.animalcha­ rity@gmail.com

Tilly is approx 5 months old and was rescued from the campo along with her siblings and Mother. Tilly weighs just 2 kilos and will remain small when fully grown. Call: 667 623 254 www.petsinspain.com

Alfie

Chico

Rusty

Tilly

Friday, August 30, 2013

13

LÍNEA DIRECTA ADVISES YOU HOW TO ACT IN CASE OF AN ACCIDENT Línea Directa Insurance advises you of the steps to follow in case of a road accident in Spain.

1.

Call the emergency number: 112. They will co­ordinate the procedure and will ask you in detail about the circumstances of the accident.

Call 966 921 003 NOW!

2.

Remain calm at all times. Switch on the emergency lights and if the state of the vehicle permits, remove the vehicle from the road, in order to avoid delays and further accidents, to the extent possible.

3.

Signal the accident location. Before stepping out of the car, put on your high­visibility jacket, which is compulsory, and place the emergency triangles correctly. The first must be placed about 50 metres behind the car in the direction of the traffic, and the second about 100m.

4.

If someone is seriously injured, never try to move them, except if in danger of fire or imminent explosion. Cover the injured per­ son, keep them calm and wait for the emergency services to arrive.

5.

If the circumstances of the location allow, always fill in the European accident report, which is an essential document for speed­ ing up the procedures and handling between the insurance companies.

If you have any doubt about how to do this, don’t hesitate to call your insurance company.

For more information, Call 902 123 104

The debt­hit Valencian region town of Buñol ­ world­renowned for its tomato­throwing Tomatina festival – charged an entry fee for its contest for the first time on Wednesday.

That didn’t stop an estimat­ ed 20 thousand rain­ drenched tourists from packing the town to take part in the hour­long toma­ to fight that left the streets running in red juice.

Tourists had to pay 10 Euros to take part, with the main buyers coming from the UK, Australia, Japan, and America, as well as visitors from around Spain.

Some 5,000 free tickets were allocated for local residents.

Many wore shower caps under the rain and goggles to protect their eyes from the acidic juice of the tomatoes, which must be squashed before they are hurled at fellow partici­ pants.

Some people dressed as tomatoes. In driving rain, some people who had partied through the night were singing, clapping and still taking swigs of wine and sangria directly from the bottle.

Buñol Mayor Joaquin Masmano Palmer says the new fee helped organizers to control crowd numbers but he has also admitted that the food fight, which has cost 140 thousand Euros to stage this year, represents a heavy burden for a town with a debt of over 4 million Euros.

KETCHUP TIME

14

Friday, August 30, 2013

TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT SPAIN I read a few UK newspapers online because I like to keep up to date with what is going on not only in Britain but also in the world.

Although I speak and understand Spanish, I still prefer to read my news in English and like to keep informed about cur­ rent issues. A few weeks ago I read about the In Tempo tower block in Benidorm which is under construction.. The article was very derogatory about Spain and factually inaccurate about the tower itself. It said that the design did not include lifts and how, basically, the Spanish are incompetent and don´t have much of a clue about anything! It was an incredi­ bly anti­Spanish article, but as a regular reader of the paper, I have got used to their anti­Spain stance which might expose a touch of jealousy from its illiterate journalists per­ haps! But whatever the reason, this article was factually inac­ curate. There are lifts in the blueprint that are to be erected on the outside of the building, Via the Expats page on Facebook that I wrote about a few weeks ago, I saw a link to a Spanish site that says that are going to be three lifts for each tower and four lifts to the penthouse apartments. The reporter even went in one of the lifts, describing it as almost being like in an aeroplane during take­off! At the end of the Spanish article, there’s a reference about the lifts and it appears this journalist had heard reports about them being forgotten and so she even included photos of the lift shafts.

What makes this even more incredible to me is that this report was dated April 30th 2013. Therefore it appears the UK report was not only inaccurate but lazy. However it only took one man, a member of the Expats in Spain page, to right the wrong of the UK newspaper as he wrote to it pointing out their mistake and asking for them to state the correct posi­ tion. This gentleman received a retraction, however this stopped short of an apology as they blamed Spain’s El Pais newspaper from 18 months before!

Firstly this is entirely unacceptable since how can an 18

month old article be lifted and called news, and how can a British newspaper reporter scribble such a biased and unchecked report? The story was removed from their site but how many had already read and believed it? And how many other papers have reported the same lies? There was also a link on Facebook to an American site which is reporting the same untruths, which was online on August 9th! There have been a few comments about how silly not to have lifts and only a few stating there are some! I have added my com­ ments about not believing everything you read!

It seems to me such a shame that certain newspapers seem to want to rubbish Spain and its people. I love this country as regular readers are aware and for a UK newspa­ per to print what are basically lies, although they call them mistakes, is unforgivable. There are still people who read

these stories and will believe everything in them. It was only through the Expats in Spain forum that I found out the truth and was asked by its founder, Mike, to tell this story. One more way to be kept informed. It also goes to show that even if you are reading The Courier from the UK it can help and advise you.

I always tell people I am a writer, which is different to a reporter. I tell my stories, which can be personal or general but there are times when I try and give information, and I would never use a source that was more than a few days old to give this information. I have no need to make things up or lie in an article. I am proud to write for The Courier, as I have seen criticism of other free papers here on the Costa Blanca, whilst I have yet to find anything bad said about this paper and I believe this is due to the integrity of the writers and jour­ nalists. We know there is no need to lie. However, much we love Spain or the UK (or dislike them!) the truth is what peo­ ple deserve to hear and read and this paper I know will con­ tinue to promote honesty over bias and myths. Sometimes people agree with us, sometimes they don´t, but that´s free­ dom of speech and something we all have, and I believe always related to a personal article rather than a news story.

So it´s thanks once again to Expats in Spain on Facebook, which now has over 3,000 members for bringing the truth out and I advise you to join and tell your friends and family in the UK to get on board. With the mounting troubles over Gibraltar, I would much rather get my facts from a source that has people living right there and next to it, rather than some reporter who doesn´t like Spain and is trying to push the UK agenda. As it is, I believe Gibraltar should stay British and I believe Rajoy is pushing this topic to hide his inadequacies as a Prime Minister, but that´s just my opinion! On a final note, I am yet to see an apology from the UK newspaper about their poor article over the In Tempo block of flats in Benidorm, but then, luckily, I´m not holding my breath.

15

Friday, August 30, 2013

VLAD’S PUTIN THE BOOT IN

The disgusting use of chemical weapons by the Syrian government now puts the authority of the United Nations and the world community at a crossroads.

The time for talking is surely over, and after so many lead­ ers led by Barack Obama said that it would be “a line in the sand” if the Assad regime resorted to such evil, we will see what happens. Even old Vlad Putin has been angry with what his old Syrian mates have been doing, but the

Russian leader is still urging caution until the facts are verified independently. The Syrian government is now

keen for UN inspectors to go in, and have been running propaganda that the rebels were behind the chemical attacks. I hate to say it, but Putin has a point. The inspectors should do their job, and then report back, before American warships start firing missiles from the Med. There must be a united approach backed by the UN, and the inspectors must be listened to and believed, as opposed to them completely ignored in Iraq, because it did not suit the agenda of Messrs. Bush and Blair.

It’s 50 years since the fantastic Martin Luther King “I have a Dream” speech in Washington. Yes,

q

we have a black US President, but with the recent scandalous verdict in Florida involving the slaying of teenager Trayvon Martin, I wonder if the good Doctor would have honestly believed that America had really dramatically moved forward on certain racial fronts in the last half century?

Pure opportunism is what I would describe Labour’s backtracking (par­ don the pun!) over the new high speed rail­plans for England. Lord Mandelson, Lord Adonis, and Alistair Darling are all expressing reservations, presumably to try and get some cheap votes from luddites who are living close to the proposed route? Since Darling is a Scottish MP, and the other two don’t have to worry about little trifles like

q

elections, I presume they are being used as stalking­hors­ es by Labour’s leadership to see if they can get some electorate benefit someway down the line (pardon the second pun!).

I never realised that the BBC Economics Editor, Stephanie Flanders was the daughter of Michael Flanders (of Flanders and Swann fame for those of you who remember!). I’m not sure what her dear departed dad would have made of the fact that in years gone by, she dated Ed Miliband and Ed Balls. I would sincerely trust that her economic analysis is more interesting and reveal­ ing than the image in my head of her sharing a bed with those two paragons of charisma.

Ed Miliband told a Labour meeting in

q

q

Edinburgh last weekend that he had a clear vision of what he saw as the future for the UK. He stated the obvious that the next elec­ tion would be about living standards (I’d never have guessed that), but there was no more concrete infor­ mation about his vision, and what he would actually do.

No wonder the list of Labour ex­ministers scribbling away in frustration in national papers pleading for action against the Tories seems to be rising on a daily basis. The latest poll on Sunday pro­ duced figures, according to a pollster, that puts Miliband on an equal footing with Iain Duncan Smith when he led the Conservatives, and we all know what happened to him!

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Cheap, tasty family meals Meals for four, for €1.50, or less, a head! Saving money doesn't have to mean going without your favourite foods, or missing out on fantastic flavour.

Spicy stuffed butternut squash This delicious vegetarian recipe works brilliantly as a sim­ ple main course.

Ingredients

1. 2 butternut squash, halved lengthways and deseeded 2. 2 tbsp olive oil 3. 1 red chilli, deseeded and finely chopped 4. 300g bag baby spinach 5. Juice of ½ lemon 6. 100g goat’s cheese, crumbled 7. 2 tbsp pumpkin seeds

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 180°C/fan160°C/ gas 4. Cut off the long halves of each squash and put the round halves on a baking tray. Drizzle with 1 tablespoon oil and roast for 20­25 minutes.

2. Meanwhile, peel the remaining squash and cut into cubes. Heat the remaining oil and fry the cubed squash with the chilli for 5­10 minutes, until tender. Stir in the spinach until wilted and season well.

3. Remove from the heat and stir in the lemon juice, cheese and pumpkin seeds. Remove the squash from the oven and preheat the grill to medium. Fill the squash with the spinach mixture and grill for 5 minutes, until the cheese has melted.

Caribbean chicken with rice and black beans

A moreish taste of the Caribbean, and for less than €1.50 a head.

Ingredients

1.

2.

3.

4.

4 tbsp olive oil 1 red chilli, deseeded and finely chopped Bunch of fresh coriander, roughly chopped 50g breadcrumbs

5. 8 skinless, boneless chicken thighs, halved 6. 300g basmati rice 7. 2 garlic cloves, crushed 8. Zest and juice of 1 lemon 9. 400g can black beans (also known as turtle beans), drained and rinsed

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 190°C/fan170°C/gas 5. Whizz 2 tablespoons of the olive oil with the chilli and coriander to form a paste and mix with the breadcrumbs. Spread over the chicken pieces. Place on a baking sheet and cook in the oven for 20 minutes, until golden and crispy.

2. Meanwhile, cook the rice in boiling salted water for 10­ 12 minutes, then drain. Set aside.

3. Heat the remaining oil in a pan and add the garlic and lemon zest and gently fry for 30 seconds, then add the rice and black beans and stir­fry together for 5 minutes. Season and stir in the lemon juice. Serve the rice with the chicken.

Lamb and anchovy meatballs

For less than €1.50 a head, these Mediterranean­inspired kebabs are a sunny delight.

Ingredients

1. 500g lamb mince 2. 3 anchovy fillets, chopped 3. 40g fresh breadcrumbs 4. Finely grated zest of 1 lemon, plus a squeeze of lemon juice 5. 2 garlic cloves, crushed 6. 3 tbsp chopped fresh flatleaf parsley 7. 3 tbsp vegetable oil 8. 1 red onion, finely sliced 9. 2 tbsp extra­virgin olive oil 10. 200ml Greek yogurt 11. 1 tbsp chopped fresh mint

12. 4 pitta breads, toasted

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 180°C/fan160°C/gas 4. In a large bowl, put the lamb, anchovies, breadcrumbs, lemon zest, half the garlic, and half the chopped parsley, and mix well together using your hands.

2. Season well, then shape into 20 balls. Heat the veg­ etable oil in a frying pan over a medium heat. Add the meat­ balls, in batches, and cook for 2­3 minutes, turning, until browned all over. Transfer to a roasting tin and roast for a further 10 minutes.

3. Soften the onion by soaking in a bowl of boiling water for a few minutes, then drain and refresh under cold water.

In a bowl, mix with the olive oil, lemon juice and remaining parsley.

4. In a bowl, mix the yogurt with the remaining garlic and mint and season to taste. Serve the meatballs and red onions in toasted pittas and accompany with the minty dressing.

Herby chicken goujons with crispy new potatoes

These chicken goujons are summery comfort food at its best, and this cheap recipe cost less than €1.50 a head. Try adding different herbs to the breadcrumbs or a pinch of chilli flakes.

Ingredients

1. 100g plain flour, seasoned 2. 1 large free­range egg, beaten 3. 100g fresh white breadcrumbs 4. 2 tbsp fresh thyme leaves 5. 800g new potatoes 6. 5 tbsp vegetable oil 7. 4 chicken thighs, skinned, boned and cut into pieces

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 220°C/fan200°C/ gas 7. Place the

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Friday, August 30, 2013

flour in a bowl, the egg in a second bowl, and the bread­ crumbs and thyme in a third.

2. Boil the potatoes in a pan of salted water for 12­15 min­ utes, then drain, lightly crush and place in a roasting tin with 2 tbsp of the oil and season. Roast for 30 minutes until crispy.

3. Dust the chicken in the flour, then dip in the egg, fol­ lowed by the herby breadcrumbs. Heat the remaining oil in a frying pan and fry the goujons for 2­3 minutes, turning, until golden. Place on a baking sheet and bake for 5­6 minutes until cooked through.

4. Serve the goujons and potatoes with mayonnaise for dipping, if you like.

Spicy prawn and chickpea curry

Adding chickpeas to recipes is a great way to save money as you can get away with using less of the expensive meat or fish. They are also really good for you. This curry is a cheap supper too, only costing around €1.50 a head.

Ingredients

1. 2 tbsp olive oil 2. 1 large red onion, sliced 3. 1 garlic clove, sliced 4. 1 tbsp harissa paste 5. 400g can chopped tomatoes 6. ½ tsp caster sugar 7. 1 tsp red wine vinegar 8. 400g can chickpeas, drained and rinsed 9. 200g raw peeled king prawns 10. A handful of chopped fresh coriander 11. A good squeeze of lime juice 12. Rice and flatbreads, to serve

Method

1. Heat olive oil in a pan over a low heat and fry the onion for 5 minutes until soft. Add garlic and 1 tbsp harissa paste and cook for a further 2 minutes. Stir in tomatoes, sugar, vinegar, season and bring to a simmer.

2. Add the chickpeas. Simmer for 10 minutes, then stir in the prawns and cook for 3­4 minutes until they are pink.

3. Stir in a handful chopped fresh coriander and a good squeeze of lime juice and serve with lime wedges, rice and flatbreads.

Sausage and herb stuffed aubergines

Watching the pennies? This recipe uses sausage meat instead of mince for a cheap alternative.

Ingredients

1. 2 large aubergines, halved 2. 4 tbsp olive oil 3. 1 red onion, finely sliced 4. 1 red pepper, finely sliced 5. 2 garlic cloves, crushed 6. 4 sausages, skinned and broken into small pieces 7. Large handful of fresh flatleaf parsley, finely chopped 8. Small bunch of fresh sage, finely chopped 9. Handful of fresh white breadcrumbs

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 200°C/fan180°C/gas 6. Put the aubergines on a baking sheet, drizzle with 3tbsp of the oil and season well. Roast for 25­30 minutes until really soft.

2. Meanwhile, heat the remaining oil in a frying pan and gently cook the onion and red pepper for 10 minutes until very soft. Add the garlic and cook for a further 2­3 minutes.

Transfer to a bowl.

3. Add the sausage pieces to the pan and fry until golden brown, then add to the onion and pepper mixture. Once the aubergines are cooked, scoop out most of the flesh, leaving a thin layer next to the skin. Roughly chop the scooped­out flesh and add it to the the sausage and veg mixture.

Season and stir through the herbs.

4. Spoon the mixture back into the aubergine shells, then scatter with the breadcrumbs. Cook for 5 ­ 10 minutes until golden brown. Serve with garlic bread and a green salad.

Vegetable fritters with poached eggs

These crispy vegetable fritters belong with soft poached eggs. A marriage made in heaven and a cheap vegetarian dinner!

Ingredients 3 carrots, grated 1. 200g (about 2) maris

piper potatoes, grated and squeezed really dry 2. Bunch of spring onions, finely sliced 3. 3 tbsp chopped fresh parsley 4. 200g vegetarian feta, crumbled 5. 3 tbsp plain flour 6. 6 large, very fresh free­range eggs 7. Vegetable oil, for shallow frying

Method

1. Mix the carrot, potato, onion, parsley and feta in a bowl. Add the flour and sea­ son well. Separate 2 of the eggs, then stir the egg yolks into the veg mixture. Put the 2 egg whites in a clean bowl and whisk to soft peaks, then fold into the mixture.

2. Heat 0.5cm oil in a sauté pan. Add heaped spoonfuls of the mixture to the oil, in batches, cooking for 3 minutes each side until golden brown – you should make about 12 in all. Remove with a slotted spoon, drain on kitchen paper and keep warm.

3. Meanwhile, bring a wide pan of water to the boil and soft­poach the remaining eggs for 3­4 minutes each.

4. Place 3 fritters on each plate and top each with a poached egg to serve.

Spinach and feta filo pie

This vegetarian pie costs around €1.50 per person to make. It's a cheap and cheerful meal that looks more expen­ sive than it is!

Ingredients

1. 500g spinach 2. A knob of butter 3. 1 large onion, finely chopped 4. 2 garlic cloves, chopped 5. 200g feta, crumbled 6. 4 tbsp pine nuts, toasted 7. 3 large free­range eggs, beaten 8. 4­6 filo pastry sheets 9. ½ tsp caraway seeds 10. A tomato and red onion salad, to serve

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 180°C/fan160°C/gas 4. Wilt the spinach in a large pan over a low heat. Allow to cool, then drain well, squeezing out the excess liquid with your hands.

2. Melt a knob of butter in a frying pan and add the onion.

Cook for 5 minutes, until soft. Stir in the garlic and cook for a further minute.

3. Remove from the heat and add to a bowl with the spinac, feta, pine nuts and eggs. Mix together and season well. Spoon into the base of a 1­litre baking dish.

4. Brush 4­6 filo pastry sheets with melted butter, lightly scrunch and lay over the spinach mixture. Sprinkle with ½ tsp caraway seeds and bake in the oven for 25­30 minutes, until the pastry is crisp and golden.

5. Serve with a juicy tomato and red onion salad.

18

Friday, August 30, 2013

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com­ pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain seven years ago hav­ ing left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

TIP: Brian was getting a message from Norton every time TIP: Linda was having problems collecting her Hotmail he started his computer email on her iPad Hi Rich I keep getting an error message come up it says error 8506,421 then it says unable to fix go to the Norton support I have done this twice and still getting error message any ideas. Also keep getting an error message saying that entry can’t be got and I have to click on it several time to clear it again any ideas. Brian

Q A

Hi Brian, that message means that your Norton instal­ lation is corrupt, if the message doesn’t go away after a reboot then try removing it and reinstalling it.

Update: Hi thanks for advice deleted and rein­ stalled hope that's the end of it.

ADVICE: Brian was having problems with Skype after adding a webcam Hello Richard, I have a quick question for you regarding the use of cameras on my computer. As you know the computer has a built in camera which works fine with Skype etc., but its limited in the angles it can be used with, so I bought an external camera USB plug and play connection. It installed ok and shows on the devises list but I cannot find anything in the programme list. When I go to use the camera it goes to the built in one. My question is, do I have to disable the built in one, I have looked and cannot see an option to do this. I cannot see an option to either open the new camera or choose which one to use. Regards, Brian

Q A

Hi Brian, it sounds like you need to specify, within Skype, that you want to use the external camera, you can do this by doing the following…

1. Launch Skype, click Tools, Options 2. Click Video Settings 3. You should see a drop down box allowing you to select the camera you want to use …I hope this helps resolve your problem.

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:­ www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

Hi Richard, wonder if you can help. I use Hotmail through Internet Explorer and ever since it all went to Outlook I am experiencing trou­ ble with it updating on my I­Pad. My computer updates fine.

Sometimes the pad will update and others not at all. Sometimes it goes back years and says no mes­ sages to all the items in the inbox.

I only have mail stored for less than two months. I try syncing it on the pad but makes no difference.

Each time I log into my computer the iPad syncs. Is there a solution to getting my email always up to date on the iPad? Hope you can help. Your column is most helpful. Thanks in advance, Linda

Q

A

Hi Linda, are you using the in­built mail function within your iPad, or are you using the Safari browser to go on line and view your emails?

It works best if you have it set up for the iPad's email program, you can find out how to set this up at the following link... http://windows.microsoft.com/en­GB/windows/outlook­to­go ...alternatively pop it along to our shop on the Moncayo market, we are open every Saturday from 9 until 2 and I can take a look for you.

TIP: Bob wanted to know how to listen to Lux Radio Theatre

Q

Could you please tell me if I can go into "Lux Radio Theatre" with my VLC media player if so what do I have to do.

Thank you very much.

A

Hi Bob, you don’t need to use VLC to listen, you can listen to Lux Radio Theatre by pointing your browser at

http://tunein.com/radio/Lux­Radio­Theatre­p110255

Friday, August 30, 2013

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Detoxification and your health

THE BODY’S 7 CHANNELS OF ELIMINATION

If you want to be healthy you need to under­ stand the seven systems that the body uses to eliminate waste and toxic matters. When these systems are working effectively the result is good health. When they are compromised all types of complications can result. If you want to under­ stand detoxification you need to have a clear understanding of the body’s channels of elimina­ tion.

When the body confronts a toxin or foreign sub­ stance it uses these channels of elimination to purge the toxin as quickly as possible. The key to excellent health is knowing these 7 channels of elimination like the back of your hand and doing everything possible to keep them functioning opti­ mally.

In 1904 a Russian naturopathic physician by the name of Eli Metchnikoff discovered that the body would recycle any toxin that it was not capable of purging. In the recycling process the body would utilize all 7 channels of elimination to try and get the toxic substance removed from the body. This is impor­ tant to understand because if your health has been compro­ mised it would stand to reason that one or more of the body's channels of elimination are not working effectively.

Most people cannot even name the body's seven chan­ nels of elimination. If you value your health do everything you can to understand these seven vital cleansing systems.

Liver ­ The liver is the body’s factory. It metabolizes food, filters toxins and converts ingredients into substances that are needed in all parts of the body. Your liver is one of the largest and most important organs in your body. The liver, when healthy, will store vitamins, sugars, fats and other nutrients from the food that you eat. The liver builds chemi­ cals that your body needs to stay healthy and breaks down

harmful substances, like alcohol and other toxic (poisonous) chemicals. It also removes waste products from your blood and makes sure that your body has just the right amount of other chemicals that it needs.

Learn about the liver by picking up a basic book on health and supplement accordingly.

Lungs ­ Your lungs are in charge of breathing so you bet­ ter take care of them. The best way to take care of the lungs is to give them lots of exercise. The best way to keep your lungs healthy is not to smoke. Smoking isn't good for any part of your body, and your lungs especially hate it. Deep breathing of fresh air is the best exercise for the lungs.

Spend 15 minutes each day doing deep breathing exercis­ es.

ARE YOU ADDICTED TO PAIN KILLERS? DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC Email your questions and comments to contact@medb.es

We all instinctively avoid pain; how­ ever, it is essential for our survival because it communicates danger and like an early warning system, allows us time to act. Pain is the most common reason we see the doctor, and is con­ sidered a symptom in medical disor­ ders even though it may be conve­ niently treated as a disease, usually by over worked doctors in the public sec­ tor who are usually hard pressed for time, and resort to over prescribing pain killers, to keep the line going. This has created a ‘quick fix’ attitude to health, with many people believing that an end to pain also means a cure to disease. And in healthcare, this isn’t always the case. Our natural reaction as human beings is to seek an instant remedy when we suffer pain.

Unfortunately for us, the profit oriented pharmaceutical industry also under­ stands this aspect of human psycholo­ gy quite well. And of course for them it’s a more profitable venture to find an instant remedy for pain than a cure for disease. Pain killers give an impression of healing but with the root cause still present, the pain usually returns after a short while, requiring more pain killers,

and the cycle continues. What is worse is that the number of deaths from pain killers has risen sharply over the years mainly due to over­prescrip­ tions. Most prescribed medications will cause severe damage to the body if taken even over a short period of time, but painkillers have an even deadlier edge to them. Nerves transmit pain, and by nature, they become sensitized to drug stimulation over time, making them require larger doses of pain killers to produce the same amount of pain relief. Over time this creates an addiction to pain killers, and the stronger the pain killer, the stronger the addiction. Even though there are thou­ sands of brands of pain killers available in pharmacies, there are just 3 classes of pain killers– Paracetamol, NSAIDS (Non­steroidal anti­inflammatory drugs) and opioids or narcotics. Of these classes, the most addictive are narcotics. Paracetamol is sold as sev­ eral dozen brand names, and in Spain is available as Febrectal, Dolgesic, etc.

People who take paracetamol repeat­ edly for on­going pain run a risk of what is known as a ‘staggered overdose’, a condition associated with a high risk of

liver disease that may require liver transplant. NSAIDs are the next line of pain killers usually prescribed when paracetamol isn’t strong enough to pro­ vide pain relief. There are 3 main types of NSAIDS – Ibuprofen, naproxen and COX inhibitors, and all three are sold under many different brand names.

NSAIDs can cause gastric and duode­ nal ulcers, bleeding and perforation.

Opioids are the strongest class of pain killers and include several brands con­ taining tramadol, hydrocodone, mor­ phine or combinations or their combi­ nations. These drugs belong to the same class as heroin and cocaine, and the psychological symptoms of those taking these illegal drugs or even suf­ fering from alcoholism, are no different from those taking opioid pain killers.

Other side effects include depression, weight gain and bone and joint prob­ lems. If you are in pain, don’t just reach for pain killers; make an appointment with your doctor to find out the cause of the problem.

FOR A FULL BODY DIAGNOSTIC SCAN CALL 965071745

Lymphatic system ­ Regular exercise is the best treatment that your lymphatic system can receive. The lymphatic is the body’s filter system which supports immune function. A healthy lym­ phatic system filters out bacteria and other for­ eign particles. A natural herb by the name of ara­ banogalactan is a natural cleanser of the lym­ phatic system.

Blood ­ The blood is a liquid organ which trans­ fers and transports substances throughout the body. It is what delivers the needed nutrition to those areas that are in need. Red clover and chlorella are wonderful natural cleansers of the blood system. A regular exercise routine stimu­ lates the blood system and assists the body in eliminating waste.

Skin ­ The skin is the body’s largest organ. By sweating naturally you assist in cleansing the skin and keeping it elastic and healthy. Going to a sauna and sweating is a wonderful health regi­ men for the skin.

Colon ­ The colon is vital to effective health because it serves the function of transporting waste out of the body.

Hydration of the digestion system will improve colon health.

This can be done by drinking an equivalent number of ounces of water to your body weight every day. Also, hydrat­ ing the colon through colon hydrotherapy has proven to be very beneficial to re­establishing health.

Kidneys ­ Your chances of developing a kidney stone in your lifetime are 1 in 10. In 1995, more than 3 million people in the United States had some type of kidney condition such as an infection, kidney stones or cancer. More than 300,000 people suffer from renal failure each year and undergo dial­ ysis or await a kidney transplant.

The kidneys produce urine which is the waste in the body.

Often kidney problems are the result of dehydration. A natu­ ral supplement that cleanses and provides needed nutrition for the kidneys is corn silk.

If you want to understand good health you need to under­ stand these seven channels of elimination. I urge you to understand these seven channels of elimination and do everything possible to assist them in your pursuit of excel­ lent health.

Edition 9

OFFERS OF THE MONTH Page 2

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Friday, August 30, 2013

LET US WORRY Home makeover on a budget FOR YOU! Are you tired of staring at the same drab rooms in your home, day in and day out?

Don't sit there waiting for a home improve­ ment show to "crash" your house. Get to your own DIY decorating, and the good news is you can freshen up a lot of your home for very little cost. In some cases, for free! Here are some possible pitches for ways to make over your home on a budget.

insurance can cover all your needs. Our community and business insurance can be tailored for your individual needs. We also offer a range of payment arrangements to suit you.

We have offices in Quesada and La Zenia and our friendly staff can help you create the perfect policy for all your needs. Alternatively one of our fully trained insurance advisors can visit you at your home or business.

Call us today 966 731 691 for a free quote or advice. Or email us info@spanish­insur­ ance.net and we will reply within 1 working day! Or you can visit our website www.span­ ish­insurance.net to register for a quote.

We look forward to helping you

Art is Actually Easy

This is probably the easiest and most affordable way of getting a new look from your home. Rearrange the furniture. If you've got sofas and chairs pushed against walls, try to move them for­ ward to group them together. You can also make your walls seem longer by stretching your curtain treat­ ments. Hang them a few inches above the window and let your curtains flow. The goal is to open up the room and give it more flow.

How is your art collection? You have no art collection, you say? That can change in plenty of affordable ways. In your kitchen, you can use pots, pans, and baking tins to hang on the wall. This is a great way to open up storage areas and provides easy access for your cooking tools.

When it comes to family photos or refriger­ ator artwork overflow, think collage. A strate­ gically placed corkboard covered in fabric is a great way to hang up the latest creations.

You can pick up a lot of inexpensive picture frames and turn a hall­ way into a living slide show with photos of your friends and family.

Mix and match sizes and designs and don't hang them all in a straight line. What good is keeping a picture in a box? Put it out for all to see.

Nice looking design is in the detail. You can spruce up your home decor with a bunch of fun ideas. For instance, take all those wonderful greeting cards you've received over the years and "splash" them into a dec­ orative bowl or plate. Colorful fruit placed in glass jars, vases or bowls can brighten up any room. The same can be said for adding alluring pillow accents or slipcovers on your chairs and sofas (Sure Fit has some great options). A small table can benefit from a decorative runner. Even a nice folded piece of design fabric will do the trick. You don't

Nothing says decorating like "paint job." If all you change is the colors of your walls you'll be making a vast improvement.

Instead of sticking with neutral colors, maybe this is the time when you can go bold and brighten up your rooms with reds, yel­ lows, and greens. Additionally, a large mirror works to bring in the light and make it feel like the room is bigger. By large we mean so big that you have to lean it against the wall as opposed to hanging it up. That is very chic.

Move Your Things Around

Organising a funeral is hard job to begin with, but doing this in a foreign country with different regulations can be even tougher!

At Spanish­Insurance we can offer you a policy or plan that takes care of everything for you. Avoid the stressful paperwork, keep up to speed with Spanish regulations and avoid the problem caused by frozen bank accounts. Let us take care of that for you.

With manageable monthly payments and one easy phone call you can be in control and receive the service you and your loved ones deserve.

As well as funeral cover, we offer a variety of other services. Our competitive prices for car, health, pet, house, life, boat and travel

have to spend a lot to bring in a little color.

Accents Add Accent

Walls Want in on the Action

Friday, August 30, 2013

3

Tax changes draw Apps for gardening buyers to new builds and DIY Handyman DIY - £1.49 iOS Any good decorator or builder will tell you that preparation is the key to successful DIY. This app lets you create a list of all the rooms around your home, with all the vari­ ous measurements of doorways, floors, win­ dows and walls. You can then list different tasks that need doing with notes on materi­ als and products you have to buy. Then once you've begun, tick each job off as you go along.

Changes to resale property tax rules in the Costa Blanca are drawing more and more people towards new builds. The Valencian government has now made it cheaper to buy key­ready property in the region than resale homes. Changes to transfer tax (ITP) came in at the start of this month, causing the levy to increase to ten per cent from eight per cent. The same rule has also been applied in Catalonia Richard Way, editor at The Overseas Guides Company, said: "ITP isn't levied on new­build property, but VAT (IVA) is applica­ ble, also currently at ten per cent (as well as stamp duty). Reports from estate agents are of new projects beginning to come online in the Costa Blanca, so with resale becoming dearer, brand new key­ready properties will be on the radar of foreign buyers."

He added that stats from Valencia's regional government have shown almost half of all property sales in the first three months of 2013 were to foreign buyers. This is an unprecedented level and indicates where future demand may lie.

Research has shown the Costa Blanca is one of the most popular destinations for investors in Spain, accounting for 31 per cent of all enquiries alongside Alicante, according to Kyero. The area has far and away outstripped other parts of the country, with Malaga stumbling behind in second place at just 15 per cent. Valencia and Murcia had a six per cent share each.

It looks like new apartments will be the most sought­after purchases following the new ITP rules, with the units accounting for 40 per cent of enquiries prior to the changes. However, people are only on the lookout for bargains, with most searching in the €50,000 to €150,000 price range. Yet 33 per cent are seeking three bedroom proper­ ties and 55 per cent want a swimming pool.

Marc Pritchard, sales and marketing man­ ager at Taylor Wimpey Espana, claims Kyero report provides "interesting insight" into what pushes the buttons of buyers and will no doubt provide important guidance for developers as demand for new property rises.

iHandy Carpenter - £1.49 iOS For all those wood­based and building jobs, this app is a must. It features five differ­ ent virtual tools to assist you. There's a Plumb Bob to check vertical lines, a flat sur­ face level, a spirit level, a protractor to meas­ ure angles and a rule with inches and cen­ timetres ­ all using tools within the phone such as the accelerometer to measure super­accurately. Unfortunately, it won't get rid of splinters.

MagicPlan - Free iOS If you're planning a massive round of home improvements then it's always best to know what you are doing and where. Take pictures of the rooms you're working in and this app will measure out floor plans out directly from the photos allowing you to cre­ ate a proper and precise plan to work off.

Screwfix Toolbox - Free iOS Android For many men, the Screwfix catalogue is a

must­read. This dedicated Toolbox goes one better. It will help identify exactly what prod­ ucts are needed for the jobs you're doing and how much of each you should buy.

There are also 400 demonstration videos and a handy virtual spirit level.

There will be queues down the aisles in the UK's DIY stores this weekend. So get one step ahead with their apps. They'll give you details on the products you need as well as How To videos and guides to some of the most common tasks. You can also reserve items to pick up in store.

RHS Grown Your Own Free iOS The Royal Horticultural Society know all there is to know about plants and gardening.

So if you've a bit of spare time this Bank Holiday you could turn your backyard to your advantage by growing your own fruit and veg. Not only will it save you money in the long­term, it could well be healthier too. This app runs down the 20 most common items to grow with extra paid­for downloads adding to the library with additional produce. If you're an Android user check out Fruit Garden or Veg Garden which both offer similar advice.

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Sell2Go with a deal 4 outdoor floor tile you can trust design ideas Sell2Go is a family busi­ ness situated between Torrevieja and La Mata in a busy area in the Commercial Centre Torremarina.

Experience was gained in the property business here 7 years ago and the office has existed in this area for 5 years and through dedication and hard work the business has just achieved its' busiest half year trading ever with proper­ ty sales and rentals through­ out the Costa Blanca. For most of these years here the property market has been dif­ ficult and Sell2Go have steadily progressed by giving good service and value for money. Property is marketed through their google promoted website, other premium quali­ ty websites such as Rightmove, quality extensive and wide ranging advertising and in their office. Sales are continuing regularly from all the leads and enquiries generated with buyers from all over Europe, Scandinavia and North Africa.

Sell2Go also have a busy rental section for clients who wish to generate income from their properties and the fees charged are amongst the lowest on the Costa Blanca to manage a property for holiday and/or long term rental. They look after all aspects involved from advertising, finding and check­ ing the tenant, issuing the rental contract and on­going matters during the rental term.

Where an owner cannot sell their property

Outdoor floor tile is very similar to indoor floor tile, except that it can withstand weather conditions and tolerate more wear. But just because it's more durable doesn't mean that outdoor tile colors and patterns are limited.

Slate Tiles

Slate is one of the most popular options for out­ door flooring designs.

Slate is used on walk­ ways and patios because it is easy to maintain and simple to install. It comes in many different textures and colors and is very durable. It is recommended for areas that will be exposed to lots of moisture, like around pools or hot tubs, since it is naturally slip resistant.

However, it is difficult for moisture to pene­ trate slate.

Ceramic Tiles

due to values having fallen with maybe a mortgage to pay then renting can be a very viable option to covering the regular costs involved in the expense and maintenance of property, providing a breathing space until property prices rise again.

Currently, due to demand, Sell2Go are looking for properties for both Sales and Rentals. Have a look at their website, sell­2­ go.com, send an email to info@sell­2­ go.com or give them a ring on 966 70 70 74 or 644 124 370, see them on facebook.com/sell2go.

Ceramic tiles have been used outdoors for everything from patio accents to exterior pool flooring. However, be cautious when selecting a ceramic tile to use outside as it must be able to stand up to climate changes as well as the elements. Terracotta, for example, can not resist freezing tempera­ tures, so it is best used in warmer, Mediterranean climates.

Brick Flooring Tiles

Brick flooring tiles are used to build areas around a barbecue and for building patios and walkways. the appearance of brick is definitely informal, and almost rustic in its appeal. Brick flooring tiles are durable for

just about any outdoor applications, and they able to retain a lot of heat.

Natural Sandstone and Granite Tiles

These tiles are easy to install since they snap in place over any solid and even sur­ face, giving the look of a professional finish.

Sandstone and granite tiles are available precut, and are bonded to a mesh base that interlocks and allows you to firmly place the tiles with no grout or adhesives. This auto­ matically gives you the assurance of a per­ fect alignment. If these tiles get wet, the open mesh base and small gaps between each tile allow the water to drain away between them, preventing water from pool­ ing. Since water drains away between the tiles and under them, the chances of slipping and falling are greatly reduced for those walking on them. Sandstone and granite tiles allow you to cover any space no matter what shape or size. You can expand them, rearrange them or just remove them all.

Friday, August 30, 2013

The Russians are not coming.

They’re here already!

By Michael Walsh What happened? Here in Costa Blanca the red, white and blue flag is now almost as commonplace as is the flag of Spain. It is no longer Britain’s Union Flag but the Russian Federation’s tri­colour banner that provides a welcome to affluent Russian speakers.

Little wonder; the Russians have so far invested nearly €1,000 million in Costa Blanca property. The number of Russian hol­ iday homebuyers has trebled since 2010. My Russian­Ukrainian wife, Nadia now feels as much at home here as I do. In fact, her skills as an English / Spanish to Russian copy translator keep her busy.

According to the College of Property Registrars, Russian and French buyers pushed British buy­ ers into third place.

Russia’s economic prospects are far healthier than the European Union’s.

Often forgotten, most people in the affluent former Eastern Block states also speak Russian. The Russian speaking pop­ ulation is 142 million. If we include non­ Russians but familiar with the Russian lan­ guage, this figure rises to 350 million Russian speakers. To put things in perspec­ tive there are far more Russian speakers on our doorstep than there are English speak­ ers in the United States. The Russian econ­ omy is doing better too.

Although the Russian Federation is by far the world’s largest country, it is virtually land­ locked. Unlike the Americans and Western Europeans, Russians have no natural

access to a sub­tropical climate and lifestyle.

When affluent Russians want a sub­tropical second home or holiday the Mediterranean countries are the easy option. Spain tops the list. It gets better: If as expected, visa requirements are further reduced, the sec­ ond language in the Costa regions could be Russian rather than English.

Will this happen? It is happening. Russian speaking big spenders are already pouring into Finland, the Baltic States, Poland, and London, Slovakia etc. They are doing so because they are desperate to take advan­ tage of the buoyant rouble. Retailers in Lithuania’s capital city, Vilnius say 40 per cent of their turnover is Russian rouble based.

Russian speakers are big spenders. A popular Costa Blanca restaurant, where the a la carte menu starts at €40, was packed with Russians. Nadia says it was like sit­ ting in a Moscow or St Petersburg Restaurant. Part of Torrevieja has been dubbed Little Moscow.

Anna and Richard Plaster, who recently engaged Nadia to provide their Russian translations, are realists. “The Russian mar­ ket is the mainstay of our business.”

Elizabeth and Paul Jackson of the Beauty Emporium in Benimar say their stall is being laid out for the Russian speakers.

Michael Walsh is a marketing copywriter and editor. His wife Nadia, is a professional English ­ Russian copy content translator.

662 067 490 or quite_write@yahoo.co.uk

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Friday, August 30, 2013

New season, new Asset-rich snap up ranges at The Ready property in crisis Made Curtain Outlet!

The stormy weather this week may mean the end of the really hot spell and although most people won't be throwing on their duvet covers and bedspreads just yet, here at The Ready Made Curtain outlet we are preparing for when the time comes!

We continue to bring our customers quali­ ty British home textiles in Spain. As well as extending our readymade curtain ranges, we have now taken delivery of our coordinating bedding range which includes, matching cur­ tains, duvet covers, cushions and bed­ spreads from plain crisp lines to elegant tra­ ditional florals. Our children’s bedding sets are popular with sets for girls and boys of all ages! We also have more towels in stock in a large range of eye­catching colours plus new kitchen textiles in the form of tea towel packs, oven gloves teapot cosies (we also have British 6 cup tea pots and matching mugs in stock as well!).

We are excited about our fantastic autumn/winter ranges which are starting to arrive now. In addition to new curtain and bedding designs we have some fabulous cushions due in next month. Designs for the new season are similar to what we have now and warm brown tones and teal blues are still popular and we do have some new pat­ terned curtains which come in extra­long lengths. New to the coordinating bedding

ranges are cosy duvet covers in warm reds and browns and our jacquard bed­ spreads will add a touch of luxury to any bedroom.

Our sewing service continues to grow and Angela has been very busy making and recovering outdoor furniture cushions. We can make curtains and cushions to customers specification from our newly sourced ranges of British quality fabrics. If you want to breathe life into your old curtains, why not take advantage of our curtain eyeleting service from only 3€ per eyelet. We have eyelets in nickel, silver, brass and black!

Our shop is conveniently located in Los Dolses Comercial Centre, Villamartin next to Cardmania. We are just 2 minutes along the Villamartin road from Zenia Boulevard near Dialprix. Our September opening hours are 10 until 4 Monday to Saturday. We look for­ ward to seeing you!!!

...but majority plan to stay in the UK - not moving abroad permanently.

Despite the 'crisis' in Spain ­ and the recession in the United Kingdom­ money is readily available to purchase dream homes in the sun.

"Many now approaching retirement are fortunate enough to remain relatively asset­ rich ­ despite recent economic frailties ­ opening up opportunities to take advantage of lower property prices abroad," said James Yerkess, HSBC Head of Foreign Exchange.

With property prices in free­fall in Spain since the Crisis hit five years ago ­ with reductions of 50% and more up for grabs ­ bargains are to be had through­ out Spain. And in Los Montesinos, many properties have huge reductions from that at peak prices ­ as have other areas in the Valencia region.

Property within the region of 200,000 euros, 150,000 euros; and 100,000 euros in 2005 ­ during the 'boom' ­ can now be snapped up at half that price within the Vega Baja. And Property Auctions can bear even more fruit: "I bought a property in Los Montesinos at Auction for 30,000 euros," said a property owner from

Quesada. The number of people aged 45 to 64 considering buying an overseas holiday home has risen to 38 per cent, up from 30 per cent from seven years ago, according to figures from HSBC. And unlike many who quit the UK and other European countries to become resi­ dents in Spain, a change in plans have formed. The majority of would­be buyers plan to stay in the UK ­ not moving abroad permanently. Nearly two thirds say they would stay in their overseas holiday home abroad for between three and six months a year. And a fifth said they would use it for no more than three months a year.

Spain, France and Italy are popu­ lar destinations, with average funds of £116,846 avail­ able on property purchases.

"The weakness in many overseas property markets has created some caution. Many say­ ing they would look to buy smaller properties in less expensive loca­ tions," said Yerkess.

Having purchased a property in Los Montesinos, with a saving in the region of 100,000 Euros, the Finland born gentleman ­ with the smile of a Cheshire cat across his face ­ purred: "I have bought it for the family for vacations ­ and investment."

Friday, August 30, 2013

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THE POISON LOADED PUFF Q

I am a 62 year old retired man, and in fairly good health even though I spoke half a pack of cigarettes a day. Other than quitting, which I don’t see myself doing in the near future, what can I do to improve my health?

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The most important thing for you to do right now is to detoxify your body. By that I mean helping your body get rid of toxins that would have accumulated from smoking cigarettes. It has been estimated that the smoke from cigarettes contains over 4000 differ­ ent chemicals, many of which are extremely toxic and have been linked to cancer. These toxic chemicals are the reason why ciga­ rettes are harmful to our health. Many people are aware of Carbon monoxide as a toxic by­product of cigarette smoking. Carbon monoxide displaces oxygen in haemoglobin – the red pigment that transports oxygen. A lack of oxygen equates to a lack of energy in cells. Without energy, cells cannot get rid of toxic waste mostly from cigarettes, thus creating a vicious cycle. Cigarette smoking is recognised as the biggest source of cadmium contamination in the body. Cadmium is a highly toxic heavy metal. In my experience with performing diagnostic scans, I have observed that nearly all smok­ ers and even ex­smokers are heavily contaminated with cadmium.

A number of international agencies have recognised cadmium as a cancer causing chemical. Cadmium has clearly been document­ ed to decrease attention span and memory in people. In men, it reduces sperm count and libido, and has also been linked to disor­ ders of the prostate gland. Arsenic, Cyanide and lead are known poisons, and are found in cigarette smoke. In addition, cigarette smoke is known to contain other deadly substances such as Polonium­ a cancer causing radioactive metal, Formaldehyde – used to preserve dead bodies, Methoprene – an insecticide, Benzene – used in making dyes and rubbers, among many other toxic substances. You can see that the most useful advice for any smoker is to undergo a complete detoxification process to rid the body of these toxins. First, it is important to make the distinction between a ‘Metabolic Detoxification’ and a ‘Colonic Irrigation’.

Metabolic detoxification eliminates toxins from inside the cells, while a colonic irrigation is more of an external process, to clean out the intestines. The difference between them can be likened to the difference between having your car cleaned out in a car wash, and having it cleaned out in a garage. Properly done detox usually takes several weeks. In my experience, the most effective products for eliminating toxins from the body are ‘Metabolic Cleanse’ and ‘Pectasol’. I usually use both products together for a more complete cleanse. Metabolic cleanse is a special formulation by Douglas lab­ oratories. It contains special nutrients required by the liver and intestines to remove toxic substances from the body. These special nutrients include: N­acetyl Cysteine, Inositol, and many amino acids required for the body’s detoxification processes. Pectasol is one of the most effective agents for removing from the body heavy metals such as mercury, cadmium, lead and arsenic. Research has shown that PectaSol increases the urinary excretion of heavy metals a hundred fold. Smoking is also known to destroy Vitamin C from the body, and so smokers are better off taking lots of vitamin C. Vitamin C is extremely useful to the body as a powerful antioxi­ dant. Vitamin C is quickly used by the body and the best form for smokers to take is ‘Slow release vitamin C’. In summary to improve your health as a smoker you should consider having a complete detox to eliminate toxins from your body, and also supplementing with slow release Vitamin C supplements. Pectasol is available from MedB Health Shop at a discount price of 83.94 Euros, and shipped for free to your doorstep. You can also pay on delivery.

Call 965071745.

Q A

I suffer from Rheumatoid arthritis, and no longer get relief from my pain killers. What else can I take

An effective therapy for any kind of arthritis, especially rheuma­ toid arthritis is MSM (Methyl Sulfonyl Methane). MSM is the natural form of sulphur in the body. This sulphur is not the same as the sulphur found in Sulfa drugs or creams which some people

may be allergic to. MSM is a mineral nutrient that can be likened to Calcium or Magnesium. It is found in huge amounts in the body, and plays a major role in promoting and stabilizing numerous func­ tions of the body. About half of all MSM in the body is concentrated in the muscles, skin, bones and joints, and the amount available in our body reduces as we age. MSM has powerful pain relieving and anti­inflammatory properties. It is also critical for forming the carti­ lage and surrounding tissues that make up our joints. This is why MSM is so effective for managing all manner of bone, joint or mus­ cle problem. According to many experts, MSM is the most effective agent – whether prescribed, or natural – for managing arthritis. Dr Lawrence, a renowned pain expert is quoted to have said that in his 50 years of practising medicine, he has never come across any substance as effective as MSM for dealing with pain. And I can agree with the doctor. In my clinical experience, everyone I have treated with MSM has experienced their pain reduce significantly and in many cases this has occurred soon after starting therapy.

But the dose and quality of MSM consumed is important. I have come across people who have not had any pain relief from MSM either because they took a small dose or purchased a product of questionable quality. The dose I find most effective for Rheumatoid arthritis is a starting dose of 10 grams every 12 hours for a month, and then a maintenance dose of 10 grams daily. I have seen the pain of arthritis disappear within a day on this dose. The organic form of MSM from herbs is also of a far more superior quality than the low quality synthetic kind. I would not expect the same dramatic effect from poor quality MSM. Anyone suffering from any form of arthritis or connective tissue problem­ rheumatoid arthritis, osteoarthritis, tendonitis, carpal tunnel syndrome – should try MSM for pain relief. It is truly a miracle supplement for arthritis. MSM powder (300 grams) from Douglas labs is available from MedB for 60.65 Euros, free shipping. Call 965071745 PLEASE SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO : contact@medb.es or to the editor of the courier.

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Tony

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Mayes

HE ALWAYS HAS SOMETHING TO SHOUT ABOUT

FRUITLESS TASK TO FIGHT BULLDOZERS

If you are a regular reader of my column, you will know that we live on a static holiday home site in the UK for three months ­ basically to escape from the summer sun in Spain.

When we planned our retirement we thought we had the best of both worlds ­ a home in Spain for most of the year and a holiday cabin on the UK south coast for late June, July and August. Well, our retirement paradise would have been idyllic if it wasn't for people who put money before consider­ ing others, who might be adversely affected by their money­making ideas. It's the sort of bol***ks I have had to put up with during my working life with a parade of regional managers coming up with ideas to enhance their standing in the company with a view to climbing the promotion ladder. I thought in retirement that I had escaped from it, but oh no!

Just before our return journey back to Spain we were hit with a bombshell on our holiday home site near Chichester.

Whilst we were out, the site owners had paid a visit announcing a grand plan to maximise the num­ ber of static homes in the area, Their wonderful plan was to drive a new road right through the middle of where our van and about a dozen others now stand, so they could effectively double the number of plots. OK, that's bad enough, but all this happened without one word of communication between the site owners and the lodge resi­ dents. It was left for Chinese whispers to do their worst and the rumours spread right through the park. What it means for us is that after working to create a lovely garden as well as a fruit area producing strawberries, raspberries and black­ berries all summer, it will all be bulldozed to make way for a new road. We will have to look around the park and choose another vacant plot and move there, or be transferred to another of the company's sites. Annoying and grossly incon­ venient for us, but devastating for our next door neighbour and others nearby who live on the site throughout the year.

Our neighbour and her husband have been in her home for the past nine years and have created a lovely garden overlooking the cornfields. She called it her quiet place, where she can sit and enjoy the countryside. She was dev­ astated when she learned through the grapevine what her future was going to be in the hands of an uncaring site own­ ing company. As an added insult to her, the company has previously used her garden and van for publicity material to advertise the site. Amazing (or not!) that the same company is quite prepared to bulldoze it all when pound notes float before their eyes. The company is quite within its rights to do what they are doing; as lodge owners we have no rights over the plots we occupy. The company can put us where they want, provided they move us, lock, stock and barrel to another plot at no expense to ourselves and the new plot is

that 736 employers in Britain failed to pay their workers this amount ­ the minimum legal wage ­ last year. The government plans to name and shame employers who fail to pay the minimum wage. It is estimated that a quarter of a million workers are being paid less than the minimum, according to the TUC, and, if true, it's a national scandal. Naming and shaming is simply not good enough. These employers should be fined ­ heavily. Because these wretched people are not only cheating on their staff, they are being able to undercut other companies who are doing the right thing and paying staff at least the minimum. I am well aware that it's important to encourage employers and to provide an envi­ ronment where companies flourish and help the economy, but the cheats need to be taught a lesson and if a few are taken out of business altogether, that might not be such a bad thing.

So, name and shame yes, but let's get a few rot­ ten apples in court too.

News that hospitals in Syria treated 3,600 people with "neurotoxic symptoms" leading to the deaths of 360 people, including many children, shocked the world, leading to allega­ tions that it was the Syrian regime had resorted to chemical weapons against its own people. How any "civilised" country can resort to this kind of action baffles me. The regime claimed they were not responsible and blamed "rebels" or other organisations. But their initial refusal to allow UN chemical weapon inspectors instantly into the affected areas speaks volumes as to who actually was responsible. If this had been a rebel attack, the government would have been very quick to condemn and try to produce the evidence. But the procrastination has given those responsible the time to destroy much, if not all, relevant evidence to prove conclu­ sively who was responsible.

The conflict in Syria is far from simple. It is not a case of good guys against the bad. The rebels have support from a range of Islamist groups with their own agenda which seri­ ously complicates the issue, as does the religious aspect ­ Sunni v Shia which are at each others' throats. But the most nauseous aspect of all this is the attitude of Russia and China in vetoing virtually any action by the UN effectively tying their hands to try to separate the opposing sides and protect civilians. It's worse when part of Russia's stance revolves around its supply of weapons to the Assad regime.

The conflict is now involving other surrounding Arab coun­ tries and threatens to get completely out of control. The West is virtually powerless in all this, but it's about time that the UN and the Arab League began singing from the same hymn sheet ­ otherwise there will be many more mass exter­ minations of totally innocent people.

A cloud has hung over comedian Jim Davidson after it was revealed that a number of women had made alle­ gations of sexual offences against them. After an extensive investigation. Police have said Mr Davidson will face no fur­ ther action. One allegation outside the UK has been referred to that country. There is no doubt that many women came forward to make allegations against men after the Jimmy Savile revelations, and some of those allegations were undoubtedly untrue. I cannot imagine how appalling it must be to be wrongly accused of a crime and what it must be like to go through months of anguish to try to prove your inno­ cence. Jim Davidson's love life has, to put it mildly, had its ups and downs, and there are many women who do not wish him well. But to make wrongful allegations of a sexual nature against anyone with the purpose of hurting him is despica­ ble. His treatment only underlines the need for new legisla­ tion making it illegal for people to be identified when allega­ tions are made until they are actually charged with an offence. For newspapers to have the power to ruin lives by disclosing that someone is under investigation because of some allegation or other is unjust in the extreme. Not only can it ruin lives; it could lead to a perfectly innocent person ending his or her life.

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as good as the first. Why they want to go to the expense of moving about 20 vans, digging up concrete plots, felling a line of oaks and mature trees and laying new plots, when they own an adjoining field which is just a dog walking area and earmarked for a site extension is beyond me. Anyway, the reason for writing this rant (other than releasing my frus­ trations) is to warn everyone of the dangers of taking owner­ ship of a van on a park home site, when you don't own the land upon which it stands. Your home is not your castle and you are at the whim of anyone who decides they can make more money out of your plot than they are at present. Some of the worst excesses of greedy site owners are now con­ trolled by a new UK Government Act, but sadly it doesn't set out controls to stop owners making lodge owners' lives a misery. So be warned!

Hats off to Judge Peter Murphy at Blackfriars Crown Court who put a Muslim woman in her place when she refused to remove a full­length burka when she appeared before him accused of intimidating a witness. The 21­year­ old refused to remove the veil to reveal her face, claiming she could not do so in front of men because of her religion.

The judge told her she could not stand trial in the veil ­ which only reveals her eyes ­ because her identity could not be confirmed. He added the principle of open justice overrode the woman's religious beliefs, pointing out that another per­ son could go into the dock pretending to be the defendant if she did not show her face. Good for you judge, stick to your guns here. If these people want to live in the UK, they should adopt British ways. Could you imag­ ine any Muslim country allowing a foreigner to "show disrespect" to them? Religion is being used far too often as an excuse to behave in ways contrary to how the majority expects and it's about time it's nipped in the bud. A religious belief is one thing, but inventing a never­ending list of trappings which are no more than dogma is something that should end ­ and ridiculing it may be the best way of making people see a little common sense. The woman is due to appear before the judge again on September 12th ­ no doubt surrounded by a host of lawyers trying to persuade the judge it's against her human rights to remove her veil. If that happens it will confirm to me yet again how stupid Britain has become. £6.19 is not a huge amount for any employer to pay for an hour's work, is it? And it's appalling

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Horrorscopes Aries March 21 ­ April 19 Every time you tap a key on your keyboard, you are secretly filling in a membership form to a random society. Each week henceforth you will receive a newsletter from said socie­ ty, explaining your duties and sign­up fees.

Gurning championships are no place for someone like you and yet you'll be tempted to find out not only *what* they are, in detail, but where they take place, entry fees, and who in your family has a talent for gurning.

Taurus April 20 ­ May 20 Personal warranties don't mean that you're ever going get your money back on that piece of crap you bought of the "man in the funny hat". Your lack of modesty will cause you problems today, jackass. You must decide how to continue today, whether it's by questioning everything that happens or, instead, letting it all wash over you like the water from maiden's bathwater.

Gemini May 21 ­ June 20 Something will stir your memory today and it may take a few hours for you to resolve your sense of deja vu. The good and the great come together today and miss you entirely during all their endeavours. Which is a bit sad, really. Public speaking is a big fear for you. However, shouting "Bum!" inside a supermarket is not usually an effective way of curing your problem.

Cancer June 21 ­ July 22 Everything will suddenly sound good to you today. This may be due to a syringing appointment you have earlier in the week, or it may be become love has just entered your life in the form someone floating down a river in a large plastic swan­type boat. Or it may just be because you've won a seri­ ous amount of money and people want to shower you with platitudes. Speaking of which ­ you do look amazing today!

By Pandora Leo July 23 ­ August 22 Dead clowns will try to follow you home.

I'll always be indebted to you for reading this horoscope, I hope you know that.

Going to visit a particular website and clicking on an advert you see, may help pay for future emails you receive. ;) Remember to chew before you swallow.

Check your email daily. Because you never know what may arrive.

Virgo August 23 ­ September 22 Any joke you have to seriously think about today is not worth 'getting'. Dogs will find themselves inexplicably attracted to your shins, this week. If you never liked sprouts before, try them again. Your tastes may have changed. Like your life, peanuts can be dried, roasted, blanched and put inside little potato coatings. Just like your life.

Libra September 23 ­ October 22 When there's work to be done, there's no shame in procrastination. Damaging words reach your ears after a disagree­ ment over a neighbour's pets. Damaging "poo" will be flung back across the gar­ den fence if the issue is not resolved within the next few weeks. You may soon receive good news from a vet.

Scorpio October 23 ­ November 21 Back in school when people would bully you about your hair and possibly jacket, you swore you would have your vengeance. Make today that day.

Continually turning around in a circle is not a good way to avoid seeing the horrors you have created. Your life is a mess, now stop getting dizzy and sort it out.

Sagittarius November 22 ­ December 21 When the fish wander home cooking gen­ tly, who'll be there to open the froth? Get used to seeing bruises over the next few days as you and furniture begin not seeing eye to eye. Itching may be a sign of bad things to come. You're incredible. Any joke you have to seriously think about today is not worth 'getting'.

Capricorn December 22 ­ January 19 A new love will present itself today, grab it with both hands, in all possible places.

Walk without shoes for a day and you will soon understand the nature of the soul.

Geddit! It's a...well, it's just... Eating well will dominate your life over the coming fortnight as you try hard to keep your liver from imploding.

Aquarius January 20 ­ February 18 You will be plagued by happy people, but don't be swayed by them, stay miserable.

It all used to be so much easier, but with age you're finding certain things much more difficult. You have many more years ahead of you. Overspending will find you slightly less well off this week. A tasty beverage will be coming your way today ­ something to look forward to.

Pisces February 19 ­ March 20 A film will set you straight about a number of things today and will also serve to kill between one and a half and two and a half hours of the day. Probably. Sorry, it's a slow day for you, there's nothing much I can say that will make it any more interest­ ing. Having reaches a personal goal, the future ought to look rosier for you.

Friday, August 30, 2013

Call 966 921 003 NOW!

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Friday, August 30, 2013

SAFEST CAR IN THE WORLD? American luxury electric vehicle manufac­ turer Tesla is claiming its Model S saloon is the safest car in the world following a National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) crash test.

The US body for road safety gave the zero­emission car a 5.4 safety rating after a series of independent trials – but there’s a twist… …the NHTSA doesn’t actually publish a crash safety star rating greater than five.

However, the true figures are released to the manufacturer – and now Tesla is claim­ ing its Model S set an all­time record score for the lowest likelihood of injury to passen­ gers.

As an electric vehicle the Model S doesn’t use a big internal combustion engine, free­ ing up space in the nose. Tesla claims with just one electric motor mounted on the rear axle, these large crumple zones (especially at the front) are excellent at dissipating ener­ gy in a crash.

In turn, this means the car decelerates slower when it hits another solid object (we’re talking in relative terms here, of

course) cushioning the impact and better protecting its occupants.

For side impacts – such as being T­boned at a junction, for example – the Model S also scored well.

In the NHTSA’s ‘side pole intrusion’ test the Tesla managed to keep 63.5% of the dri­ ver’s original cabin space, meaning anyone behind the wheel would likely not be trapped by the car’s structure deforming around them.

Tesla says the Model S’s strong result comes down to the ‘multiple energy­absorb­ ing aluminium extrusions’ built into the flanks of the car’s chassis – technology similar to that used on the Apollo Lunar Lander mod­ ule.

The car also refused to roll over during parts of the NHTSA crash analysis, a factor the firm says is down to the car’s very low centre of gravity resulting from the floor­ mounted batteries – which, in further posi­ tive news, showed no signs of leaking or catching fire after impact.

Remarkably, Tesla also claims that the test machine used to assess roof strength

actually failed, highlighting: “During validation of Model S roof crush protection at an independent commercial facility, the testing machine failed at just above 4g’s.

“While the exact number is uncertain due to Model S breaking the testing machine,

what this means is that at least four addition­ al fully loaded Model S vehicles could be placed on top of an owner’s car without the roof caving in.’

The Tesla Model S is yet to go through Euro NCAP crash tests, but it very well could be the safest car in the world…

Friday, August 30, 2013

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Friday, August 30, 2013

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 6 represents F and 24 represents Z, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across

Down

1 Prejudice (4) 4 Fisherman (6) 9 Cuts in half (7) 10 Form (5) 11 Slit (5) 12 Doubt (7) 14 Time to come (6) 15 Racing gait (6) 18 Extreme (7) 20 Contaminate (5) 22 Saunter (5) 24 Wall (7) 25 Badinage (6) 26 Unpleasantly moist (4)

2 Immediate (7) 3 Artificial sweetener (9) 4 Help (6) 5 Firedamp (3) 6 Elude (5) 7 Wading bird (4) 8 Superior (6) 13 Dispersed (9) 14 Day of the week (6) 16 Teaching (7) 17 Part of a group (6) 19 Shinbone (5) 21 Revolve (4) 23 Consume (3)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1 Thus, 4 Easy, 9 Imagine, 10 Curio, 11 Snare drum, 12 Ass, 13 Warden, 15 Butter, 17 Has, 18 Applicant, 21 Pious, 22 Placate, 23 Cede, 24 Seek.

Down: 2 Haile Selassie, 3 Swear, 4 Excommunicate, 5 Servant, 6 Jigsaw, 7 Data, 8 Boss, 14 Restore, 16 Rather, 17 Hope, 19 Pipes, 20 Afar.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross­Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 Mix curds at teatime for this dessert (7) 5 Capone overweight and deadly overall (5) 8 Getting support when inactive (7) 9 Dial number wrongly and get a poem (5) 10 I sped in confusion when caught sight of (5) 11 The late comic was a competitor (7) 12 Sailor next to fathom mark (6) 14 Colliers are underage, I’ve heard (6) 17 Garble a new form of mathematics (7) 19 Pawns his white wines (5) 22 Divided country in New York or Eastern seaboard area (5) 23 Telegraph about ancient city can be fixed (7) 24 Treats dossiers, no sir (5)

25 Tyne cop’s remarkable power (7) Down 1 Transfers art in the Civil Service (5) 2 Slushiest removed, lets fish dish appear (5) 3 An aider turned into a Greek deity (7) 4 Chase after a pooch for its identity disc (6) 5 Trust woman (5) 6 Three sappers and me in the galley (7) 7 Steps the German amongst the lads (7) 12 Acknowledged Kent had changed (7) 13 Looks at judges (7) 15 Get left in scratchin’ her itch? (7) 16 Foreign paramedics who have the rise taken out of them will become crazy (6) 18 Have the effrontery to make money (5) 20 Taxi in a small house (5) 21 See Dutch youth leader run down (5)

Down STANDARD CLUES 1 Barrows (5) Across 2 Japanese dish (5) 1 Sweet sauce (7) 3 Daughter of King Minos 5 Deadly (5) (7) 8 At ease (7) 4 Military ID (6) 9 Greek epic poem (5) 5 Religious belief (5) 10 Snooped (5) 6 Ancient Greek or Roman 11 Runner (7) galley (7) 12 Objective (6) 7 Means of ascent (7) 14 Colliers (6) 17 Branch of mathematics 12 Expressed gratitude (7) 13 Best wishes (7) (7) 15 Come into (7) 19 Rhine wines (5) 16 Reckless (6) 22 Asian peninsula (5) 23 Responsive to treatment 18 Alloy of copper and zinc (5) (7) 20 Small home 24 Medical measures (5) 21 Shabby and squalid (5) 25 Strength (7) Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Itches, 5 Ravel, 9 Empathy, 10 Front, 11 Larch, 12 Eyelets, 13 Rotund, 15 Gratis, 19 Lambeth, 21 Vista, 23 Draft, 24 Rarebit, 25 Noisy, 26 Treaty.

Down: 2 Toper, 3 Hitchin, 4 Styled, 5 Rifle, 6 Violent, 7 Lotus, 8 Teller, 14 Timpani, 16 Reverie, 17 Scanty, 18 Thirst, 19 Laden, 20 Entry, 22 Sabot.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words As Ma 3 letter words Bid Eke Fur Neb Rot See Sob Sum 4 letter words Able Ainu Airy Anon

Baas Bene Bred Byes Caps Clef Cram Daub Derv Ease Else Eyes Glib Hobo Idol Lava Lieu Loft Lots Most

Nail Pear Ride Roll Sect Sent Stay Used 5 letter words Abbey Basks Belle Caret Defer Evens Evoke Hairy Heave Hotel

Hours Links Moult Nears Novel Oasis Obeys Orate Pains Pants Raise Re­let Rills Scuba Shake Shuts Sonny Stall 6 letter words

Ballet Chilli Granny Rankle Rarity Redeye Retell Source 8 letter words Sessions Terrains 9 letter words Enamoured Saliently

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish ­ clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Más pequeño (7) 5 Platform (5) 8 Dirección (7) 9 Boina (5) 10 To throw (ball, stone, dice) (5) 11 To hold up (rob) (7) 12 Press (newspapers) (6) 14 Eighth (6) 17 To tighten (belt, shoes) (7) 19 Place (5) 22 To take out (5) 23 Principante (aprendiz) (7) 24 Semillas (5) 25 Estaciones (partes del año) (7)

Down 1 Principio (comienzo) (5) 2 To walk (5) 3 Hares (7) 4 To scratch (with claw, nail) (6) 5 Ámbar (5) 6 Right (not left) (7) 7 Notary (7) 12 Alabanzas (7) 13 Dolor de oídos (7) 15 Waterfall (7) 16 Taladros (herramien­ tas) (6) 18 Neumáticos (de ruedas) (5) 20 So much (5) 21 Works (musical, the­ atre, literature) (5)

29

Friday, August 30, 2013 Across 1 What name is given to the remains or impression of a prehistoric plant or animal embedded in rock and pre­ served in petrified form? (6) 4 What title or form of address is often given to a Roman Catholic cardinal?

(8) 10 Formerly official policy in South Africa, what name was given to the policy or system of segregation or discrimination on grounds of race? (9) 11 Which city is the capital of Morocco? (5) 12 What was the surname of the Conservative politi­ cian who was prime minister of the UK from 1955 to 1957? (4) 13 Which antibiotic, discov­ ered in 1928 by the Scottish scientist Alexander Fleming, was the first antibiotic to be used by doctors? (10) 15 Which blue­flowered Mediterranean plant of the daisy family is known in North America as the ‘endive’? (7) 16 Which adjective means ‘relating to government rev­ enue, especially taxes’? (6) 19 What name is often given

to seven performers or singers who perform togeth­ er? (6) 21 Which landlocked consti­ tutional monarchy in south­ ern Africa that achieved independence from the UK in 1966, was formerly known as Basutoland? (7) 23 What name was applied to the epidemic form of bubonic plague experienced during the Middle Ages when it killed nearly half the people of western Europe?

(5,5) 25 What was the surname of Sally, who, in June 1983, became the first American woman in space? (4) 27 Which alcoholic drink is made from fermented apple juice? (5) 28 What was the surname of the French actor, singer and entertainer who was best known for his signature songs, including Louise, Mimi, Valentine and Thank Heaven for Little Girls? (9) 29 Which adjective means ‘dry and hard from exposure to the sun’s heat? (8) 30 With which sport would you principally associate Jeremy Bates, Buster Mottram, Mark Cox and

SUDOKU (Easy)

Quiz Word

Andrew Castle? (6) Down 1 Which vigorous style of Spanish music is normally

played on the guitar and accompanied by singing and dancing? (8) 2 Which type of shandy consists of draught cider

and lager in equal propor­ tions? (9) 3 What is the ninth letter of the Greek alphabet? (4) 5 What name is normally given to the region of the front of the body between the chest and the waist? (7) 6 What name for ‘excessive interest in or admiration of oneself and one’s physical appearance’, is derived from the name of a beautiful young man, who, according to Greek mythology, fell in love with his own reflection?

(10) 7 What was the surname of the 19th century Swedish chemist who is best remem­ bered for his invention of dynamite? (5) 8 Which adjective means ‘still in existence’ or ‘surviv­ ing’? (6) 9 Which cultivated plant of the parsley family has close­ ly packed succulent leaf stalks that are used as a salad or cooked vegetable?

(6) 14 Seoul is the capital of which Asian country? (5,5) 17 Which noun that means ‘a wearing down to weaken or destroy’ is derived from the Latin for ‘to run’? (9)

18 According to French law, which controversial pâté is defined as the liver of a duck fattened by force feeding corn with a ‘gavage’? (4,4) 20 Which thick, sticky dark syrup, made from partly refined sugar is used both in cooking as a sweetener and as a condiment? (7) 21 Which word can mean both ‘rubbish such as paper, tins, and bottles left lying in an open or public place’ and ‘a number of young animals born to an animal at one time? (6) 22 Which simple device for calculating performs arith­ metic functions by manually sliding counters on rods or in grooves? (6) 24 Wystan Hugh were the first names of which famous British­born Pulitzer Prize­ winnning poet? (5) 26 What is the stage sur­ name is the American actor, producer and director whose films include Moonstruck (1987), Raising Arizona (1987) and Leaving Las Vegas (1995), for which he won the Academy Award for Best Actor? (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

EXPRESIONES DE CORTESIA POLITE EXPRESSIONS

Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

science QUIZ

ANSEWRS: 1. Left 2. Barometer 3. cucumber 4. Switzerland 5. Rhesus Monkey 6. nine months 7. a drone 8. Mercury 9. 24 Ribs 10. barometer 11. South Africa 12. Morris 13. Usually Between 3 & 5

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 9 Iwo Jima, 10 A la mode, 11 Chimera, 12 Trident, 13 Salad Days, 15 Drake, 16 Saltire, 19 Acolyte, 20 Abbey, 21 Carpe diem, 25 Drachma, 26 Stipend, 28 Slovene, 29 Ikebana.

Down: 1 Discus, 2 Novial, 3 Mile, 4 Panama, 5 Fantasia, 6 Palindrome, 7 Rosemary, 8 Aesthete, 14 Daisy wheel, 16 Stardust, 17 Labrador, 18 Enclaves, 22 Russia, 23 Iceman, 24 Madras, 27 Ives.

feliz cumpleaños

buena suerte

gracias por todo

buenos días

hasta pronto

buen provecho

hasta la vista

como estas

muchas gracias

cuanto lo siento

mucho gusto

encantado

perdón

eres muy amable

¡salud!

Empareja estas palabras ­ Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz.

1.bienvenido, 2.buena suerte, 3.buenos días, 4.buen provecho, 5.como estas, 6.cuanto lo siento, 7.encantado, 8.eres muy amable, 9.feliz cumpleaños, 10.gracias por todo, 11.hasta pronto, 12.hasta la vista,

Soduko

13.muchas gracias, 14.mucho gusto, 15.perdón, 16.¡salud! a.Cheers!, b.See you soon, c.Thank you very much, d.How are you?, e.Good luck!, f.Sorry, g.Until we see you next, h.Bon apetit, i.Happy birthday,

Span ­ Eng

Quizword

j.Enchanted, k.Good morning, l.Welcome, m.Pleased to meet you, n.You are very kind, o.Thank you for everything, p.I’m so sorry.

Answers: 1l, 2e, 3k, 4h, 5d, 6p, 7j, 8n, 9i, 10o, 11b, 12g, 13c, 14m, 15f, 16a.

1. Which side of the brain is the rational side, the left or right?

2. In 1643 Evangalisa Torichelli invented the first what?

3. what is considered to be the least nutritious fruit or vegetable?

4. From Which Country Did The Leek Originate?

5. What is the common name of the 'bander macaque'?

6. what is the gestation period of a cow?

7. what non­working stingless bee mates with the queen?

8. If an alloy is an amalgam what metal must it contain?

9. How Many Ribs Do You Have?

10. what is the instrument used to measure atmospher­ ic pressure?

11. Where Do Swallows Go When They Migrate From Britain In The Winter?

12. Which British Car Companys First Car Was The 2 Seater Oxford In 1913?

13. How Many Are There In A Clutch Of Blackbirds Egg's?

bienvenido

Fill It In

30

Friday, August 30, 2013

TRELI ON THE TELLY

MARVELLOUS AGENTS SEE OFF SKY

Fincham saw his network given the Channel of the Year award at the Edinburgh International TV Festival last weekend, though I suspect a lot of that had purely to do Good on ITV boss Peter with Broadchurch. It also got Fincham for ordering a some street cred for buying new series of the hilarious in The Americans, which fin­ comedy, Vicious.

He ished last Saturday with an wasn’t bothered about exciting finale ahead of what the critics said or the series two next year, which ITV will show, despite the lowish viewing figures.

The same for The Job Lot, totally unjustified poor audi­ which will switch to ITV2, ence numbers. But I’ll bet along with a second run for you anything that Fincham the Roman comedy, Plebs. must have been amongst the

with ALEX TRELINSKI

bidders for the heavily antici­ pated Marvel show, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. This direct spin­off from the blockbuster Avengers Assemble movie will feature characters from the big screen epic, and will also be run by the guy who took charge of the movie, Joss Whedon.

UK money was being thrown to get the rights for this like a big time crap table shoot out, and SKY was sur­ prisingly outbid by Channel Four, who will screen this just a day or two after the US.

That’s great news for free to air viewers, and with Four also getting the new Jerry Bruckheimer thriller, Hostages, in addition to a new Michael Sheen starring drama, Masters of Sex, you do wonder if SKY have spent too much money on expen­ sive football rights in their bidding war with the new BT Sport? SKY Living will pre­ miere a new version of Dracula (which I gather is a bit boring) but there is quite a buzz over a show called The Blacklist, which is about a criminal who helps the FBI catch his former colleagues.

q

The vast majority of the new American shows have no UK buyers as yet, since there’s now an element of wait and see, so that a British channel doesn’t have to shell out money on a pro­ gramme that ends up being pulled because it’s no good.

All deals are done on the basis of just seeing a pilot

ally break the law. With the revolving door, marked exit, now including Michelle Collins to add to Sue Johnston and Stephanie Cole, as well as all the others I mentioned a few weeks ago, Corrie bosses need to be very careful that they don’t fall into the Eastenders pitfall of having a bunch of new non­descript characters Plane journeys appear that nobody is bothered to be the big mode of about. It’s interesting that the departure from Weatherfield new BBC1 boss, Charlotte these days, with Ken Barlow Moore, has said that getting in Canada; Kevin Webster Eastenders to become a top­ trotting off to Germany; and notch drama was a priority Tommy Duckworth set to fly for her. ITV might need to off to somewhere that does take notice.

Bad news for Holby City not have access to nasty You fans. Guy Henry is leav­ Tube rapping videos! I actu­ ally think that Chris Fountain ing his role as Henrik was harshly treated by Hanssen to return to the Shakespeare Coronation Street bosses Royal and a few months of suspen­ Company, which is a big sion would have been a more shame as he’s been the appropriate punishment for class act of the show for the somebody who did not actu­ last three years. episode, which normally is promising, but then you are in the lap of the gods! Or of course you take the SKY approach which is to see a US show become a hit on a free channel, and then pay silly money to snatch the rights when the contract comes up for renewal, which is what they did with Glee and Mad Men.

q

q

The Courier Friday TV 00:35 02:25 02:30 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 22:30 23:00 23:25 23:35

Bad Company Holiday Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Heir Hunters Homes Under the Hammer Countryside 999 Don't Get Done, Get Dom Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show Nigel Slater's Dish of the Day EastEnders Celebrity MasterChef Big School Mrs Brown's Boys BBC News National Lottery Update Would I Lie to You?

00:20 Horizon 01:20 Maureen Lipman: If Memory Serves Me Right

02:20 What Remains 03:20 This Is BBC Two 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 09:15 The A to Z of TV Gardening 10:00 Hebrides: Islands on the Edge 11:00 Animal Park 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Scott of the Antarctic 14:45 In Which We Serve 16:35 Talking Pictures 17:15 A Picture of Britain 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! Trade Secrets 20:30 Only Connect 21:00 Mastermind 21:30 Gardeners' World 22:00 The Burrowers: Animals Underground 23:00 The Trip 23:30 Newsnight

01:50 04:00 04:25 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 23:10 23:40 23:45

Jackpot247 Tonight ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Daybreak Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Star Treatment ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Storage Hoarders Secret Dealers ITV Meridian Weather Long Lost Family Take on the Twisters ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Emmerdale UEFA Super Cup Live ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather The Boat That Rocked

BIG FAT GYPSY WEDDINGS In England, 16­year­old Lully prepares for her big day, encountering several problems along the way, while in Ireland, the Joyces look forward to a fam­ ily christening and celebrate St Patrick's Day ­ but grandfather Joe is banned from every pub in town.

Brendan, a distant relative of Joe's, takes a ferry trip to Ireland, keen to keep his links with his homeland alive.

00:35 00:40 01:40 02:35 03:30 04:25 05:20 06:15 07:00 07:10 07:35 08:00 08:10 08:35 09:00 09:30 10:05 10:35 11:05 11:35 12:00 13:00 13:05 Away 14:05 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00

Random Acts 24 Hours in A&E Benefits Britain 1949 Attack of the Zeppelins Secret Eaters Phil Spencer: Secret Agent Deal or No Deal Countdown The Treacle People The Hoobs The Hoobs Hugh's 3 Good Things According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory Undercover Boss Australia Channel 4 News Summary A Place in the Sun: Home or The Last Command Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv Four Rooms Big Fat Gypsy Weddings Alan Carr: Chatty Man

August 30

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 Cricket on 5 01:55 SuperCasino 04:55 Great Scientists 05:20 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Michaela's Wild Challenge 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Animal A&E 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:10 Accidental Friendship 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Animal A&E 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 World's Biggest Pets 21:00 Construction Squad: Operation Homefront 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:30 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side

31

The Courier Saturday TV

August 31

01:35 The Quatermass Xperiment 02:55 David Starkey's Music & 00:05 Pramface

Monarchy

00:40 The 51st State

03:55 This Is BBC Two

02:05 Weatherview

07:00 This Is BBC Two

02:10 BBC News

08:05 The Boy with Green Hair

07:00 Breakfast

09:25 The Little Minister

11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:30 Home Cooking Made Easy 13:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather

11:10 Reel History of Britain 11:40 The Private Life of Plants 12:30 University Challenge 13:00 The A to Z of TV Cooking

13:15 Football Focus

13:45 Caribbean Food Made Easy

14:00 Inspire: The Olympic Journey

14:15 EastEnders 16:10 Coast

14:30 Bargain Hunt

16:30 Wild China

15:00 Live MotoGP

17:30 Urban Jungle

16:00 Rowing

18:00 Flog It! Trade Secrets

17:30 Final Score

19:00 Dragons' Den

18:15 That Puppet Game Show 18:55 BBC News; Regional News and Weather

20:00 Proms Extra 2013 20:40 Dad's Army 21:10 Thatcher ­ The Downing Street

19:15 Pointless Celebrities 20:05 I Love My Country 20:50 The National Lottery: Break

Years 22:15 This World 23:15 QI XL

02:10 Jackpot247 04:00 Columbo: Death Lends a Hand 05:15 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Jake and the Neverland Pirates 07:35 Poppy Cat 07:50 Canimals 08:00 Canimals 08:05 Bookaboo 08:15 Almost Naked Animals 08:30 Fish Hooks 08:45 Fish Hooks 09:00 Bottom Knocker Street 09:15 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Dinner Date 10:25 Saturday Cookbook 11:20 Murder, She Wrote 12:20 Saturday Farm 13:20 ITV News and Weather 13:34 ITV Meridian Weather 13:35 Carry On Screaming 15:25 The Chase 16:25 Midsomer Murders 18:30 ITV Meridian Weather 18:45 ITV News and Weather 19:00 New You've Been Framed!

19:30 Stepping Out 21:00 The X Factor 22:20 Through the Keyhole 23:15 ITV News and Weather 23:29 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 Forgetting Sarah Marshall

00:05 Rude Tube 01:05 Random Acts 01:10 The Last Leg 01:55 I'm Spazticus 02:20 New Girl 02:45 The Mindy Project 03:05 The Ricky Gervais Show 03:35 St Elsewhere 04:25 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 05:20 Deal or No Deal 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 VW Racing Cup 08:05 The Grid 08:30 Triathlon 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 12:55 The Simpsons 13:30 Undercover Boss Australia 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:15 Come Dine with Me 19:55 Channel 4 News 20:25 9/11: 102 Minutes That Changed America 22:20 Terminator 2: Judgment Day

THE XFACTOR

the Safe 21:40 Casualty 22:30 Michael McIntyre's Comedy Roadshow 23:00 BBC News; Weather 23:20 Match of the Day

The talent extravaganza returns with a new look for its 10th series and welcomes Sharon Osbourne back to the judges' desk in her first permanent role on the show since 2007. Replacing Tulisa, she joins Gary Barlow, Nicole Scherzinger and Louis Walsh (who recently announced this will be his final year) to search for the nation's next singing sensation.

00:00 Weather 00:05 Reading 2013

01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Motorsport Mundial 05:20 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:20 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:45 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 11:10 Power Rangers: Megaforce 11:40 Slugterra 12:05 Inside Hollywood 12:10 Celebrity Big Brother 13:35 Columbo: Prescription Murder 15:40 The Burning Hills 17:35 The Four Feathers 19:55 5 News Weekend 20:00 Cricket on 5 21:00 NCIS 21:55 NCIS 22:50 5 News Weekend 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

The Courier Sunday TV

September 1

00:40 The Football League Show

00:00 Jacknife

01:55 Weatherview

01:35 Federal Hill

02:00 BBC News

03:10 This Is BBC Two

07:00 Breakfast

07:00 This Is BBC Two

08:35 Match of the Day

07:30 Mighty Joe Young

10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 Sunday Morning Live

09:00 Around the World in 80 Gardens 10:00 Gardeners' World

12:00 Homes Under the Hammer

10:30 The Beechgrove Garden

13:00 BBC News

11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites

13:05 Weather for the Week Ahead 12:30 The Incredible Spice Men 13:00 Live MotoGP 13:10 Helicopter Heroes 13:40 Countryfile 14:35 Bargain Hunt

15:30 Rowing 17:00 Equestrian 19:00 Flog It!

15:15 Ultimate Swarms

19:30 Iolo's Great Welsh Parks

16:15 Victoria Wood's Nice Cup of

20:00 The Great British Bake Off

Tea

21:00 Dragons' Den

17:15 Escape to the Country

22:00 The Story of the Jews

18:00 Songs of Praise 18:35 Britain's Big Wildlife Revival 19:35 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Antiques Roadshow 22:00 What Remains 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 Match of the Day 2

23:00 Blackadder the Third 23:30 Girl with a Pearl Earring

01:30 04:00 04:40 07:00 07:10 07:25 07:35 07:50 07:55 08:05 08:15 08:30 08:45 09:00 09:15 09:30 10:25 11:15 12:15 12:24 12:25 13:30 15:30 16:50 17:50 Vegas 19:30 19:45 20:00 21:00 22:00 23:55

Jackpot247 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA ITV Nightscreen Poppy Cat Poppy Cat Poppy Cat Poppy Cat Canimals Canimals Bookaboo Almost Naked Animals Fish Hooks Fish Hooks Bottom Knocker Street Bottom Knocker Street Country House Sunday The Jeremy Kyle Show USA Murder, She Wrote ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Ade in Britain Columbo: the Conspirators The X Factor The Chase The Flintstones in Viva Rock ITV Meridian Weather ITV News and Weather Coronation Street The X Factor Vera ITV News and Weather

THE PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS Drama based on a true story, starring Will Smith and featuring Jaden Smith. After his wife walks out, downtrodden medical salesman Chris Gardner is left to bring up his five­year­old son alone. The sit­ uation worsens when the pair are made homeless, but Gardner refuses to be beaten. Gaining a presti­ gious though unpaid stockbroker internship, he doggedly chases his dream of a better life.

01:05 Fair Game 03:00 Hollyoaks 05:05 Deal or No Deal 06:00 Countdown 06:45 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Ironman 2013 08:30 Triathlon 09:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:55 Frasier 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:30 The Big Bang Theory 14:00 The Big Bang Theory 14:30 The Simpsons 15:00 The Simpsons 15:30 10 Things I Hate about You 17:25 Location, Location, Location 18:30 Alvin and the Chipmunks: the Squeakquel 20:10 Channel 4 News 20:40 Rebuilding the World Trade Centre 22:00 The Dilemma

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Psych 01:00 SuperCasino 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:25 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:25 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:40 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:45 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Power Rangers Samurai 11:35 Slugterra 12:00 Inside Hollywood 12:05 Celebrity Big Brother 13:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 13:55 World's Biggest Pets 14:55 Fly Away Home 17:05 Nim's Island 18:55 The Pursuit of Happyness 21:00 Once Upon a Time 21:55 5 News Weekend 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 The Expendables

32

The Courier Monday TV

September 2

00:40 01:20 01:40 01:45 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

That Puppet Game Show The Sky at Night Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Don't Get Done, Get Dom Plan It, Build It Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show Inside Out EastEnders Fightback Britain Motorway Cops BBC News Regional News and Weather Football Focus

01:05 02:00 03:00 07:00

Countryfile Holby City This Is BBC Two This Is BBC Two

07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Countryside 999 08:50 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 09:20 The A to Z of TV Gardening 10:05 Restoration Home 11:05 Deadly 60 on a Mission 11:35 Click 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Weakest Link 14:45 Inspire: The Olympic Journey 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Animal Park 16:30 Talking Pictures 17:15 A Picture of Britain 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! Trade Secrets 20:30 Swansea Market 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 The Incredible Spice Men 22:00 Robert Peston Goes Shopping 23:00 The Sarah Millican Television Programme 23:30 Newsnight

00:09 ITV Meridian Weather 00:10 The Cube 01:05 The Store 03:05 British Superbike Championship Highlights 03:55 Motorsport UK 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Star Treatment 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Storage Hoarders 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Long Lost Family 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Countrywise 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Doc Martin 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:35 Benidorm

00:15 01:15 03:50 04:05 05:00 05:55 06:40 07:00 07:10 08:00 08:10 08:35 09:00 10:05 11:05 12:00 13:00 13:05 13:35 13:55 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 Meals 21:30 22:00 23:00 23:55

Alan Carr: Chatty Man Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara Emily's Song Four Rooms Deal or No Deal Countdown SuperScrimpers The Treacle People The Hoobs Hugh's 3 Good Things According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond The Big Bang Theory Undercover Boss USA Channel 4 News Summary Hugh's 3 Good Things Kirstie's Vintage Gems The Four Feathers Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv Jamie's Money Saving Gadget Man The Lost Hero of 9/11 Ramsay's Hotel Hell Random Acts

JAMIE’S MONEY SAVING MEALS

Jamie Oliver demonstrates how to prepare nutri­ tious meals on a budget, offering tips on keeping costs down and wasting less food. Beginning with recipes that work out at less than £1.80 a portion, he cooks up a roast brisket of beef with all the trim­ mings, Korean stir­fried rice, and sweet pea fish pie, before showing a takeaway lover how to make his favourite treat for a fraction of the price of ordering it in.

01:00 Blood and Bone 02:40 SuperCasino 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:25 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Mio Mao 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News at Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Animal A&E 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:10 Frozen Impact 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Animal A&E 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Children of 9/11: Revealed 21:00 9/11: The Woman Who Wasn't There 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Under the Dome 23:55 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side

The Courier Tuesday TV

September 3

00:15 Room 101 ­ Extra Storage 00:55 La Bamba 02:40 Weatherview 02:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Rip Off Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Plan It, Build It 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Wanted Down Under 17:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 New Tricks 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Woman Who Woke Up Chinese

00:20 The Women's Football Show 00:50 The Story of the Jews 01:50 Paul O'Grady's Working Britain 02:50 This Is BBC Two 04:50 Locomotion: Dan Snow's History of Railways

05:30 06:00 07:00 07:05 08:05 08:50 09:20 10:05 10:35 11:35 12:00 12:30 13:00 14:00 14:05 14:45 15:15 15:45 16:30 17:15 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30

The Imagineers Schools ­ Ecomaths: Primary This Is BBC Two Homes Under the Hammer Don't Get Done, Get Dom Plan It, Build It The A to Z of TV Gardening You've Been Scammed Britain's Big Wildlife Revival HARDtalk BBC News BBC World News Daily Politics Coast The Super League Show Mastermind Great British Menu Animal Park Talking Pictures A Picture of Britain Antiques Roadshow Eggheads Flog It! Trade Secrets Swansea Market The Great British Bake Off The Midwives Family Tree Newsnight

00:05 Through the Keyhole 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 Champions League Weekly 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Star Treatment 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Storage Hoarders 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Long Lost Family 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Aussie Animal Island 21:00 Ade in Adland 22:00 Trauma: Level One 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 Words of the Titanic

THE WOMEN THAT WOKE UP CHINESE The story of 38­year­old Sarah Colwill, whose life changed overnight in 2010 when she was rushed into hospital suffering from a migraine. Having nodded off, she got the shock of her life when she woke up to find her Plymouth accent had disap­ peared, leaving her sounding Chinese.

00:00 Big Fat Gypsy Weddings 01:05 Top Boy 02:00 Run 02:55 Misfits 03:50 Nashville 04:30 St Elsewhere 05:20 Four Rooms 06:15 Deal or No Deal 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Hugh's 3 Good Things 08:05 According to Jim 08:35 Will & Grace 09:00 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:05 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 Undercover Boss USA 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Hugh's 3 Good Things 13:35 Jamie's 15 Minute Meals 14:05 The Riddle of the Sands 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Double Your House for Half the Money 22:00 Top Boy 23:00 Siege in the Sahara

00:55 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:50 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:15 SuperCasino 05:00 Great Scientists 05:25 HouseBusters 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Michaela's Wild Challenge 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:20 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Milkshake! Monkey 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Animal A&E 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Accused at 17 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Animal A&E 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Monkey Life 20:30 Highland Emergency 21:00 Born to Kill?

22:00 CSI: NY 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

33

The Courier Wednesday TV

September 4

00:30 01:30 01:35 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

Goodnight Britain Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Don't Get Done, Get Dom Plan It, Build It Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show Rip Off Food Celebrity MasterChef Who Do You Think You Are? BBC News Regional News and Weather The Call Centre

00:15 00:20 01:20 Britain 02:20

Weather This World Paul O'Grady's Working This Is BBC Two

05:00 Adapting Carmen: Re­ Imagining a Classic 05:30 Schools 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 08:45 Plan It, Build It 09:15 The A to Z of TV Gardening 10:00 Rick Stein's India 11:00 Natural World 12:00 BBC News 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 Weakest Link 14:45 Mastermind 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Animal Park 16:30 Talking Pictures 17:15 How We Built Britain 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! Trade Secrets 20:30 Swansea Market 21:00 Hairy Bikers' Meals on Wheels Back on the Road 22:00 The Many Faces of 23:00 The Culture Show 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 02:10 04:00 04:40 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30 23:35

In Plain Sight Jackpot247 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Daybreak Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Star Treatment ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Storage Hoarders Secret Dealers ITV Meridian Weather Long Lost Family The Chase ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Big Star's Little Star Whitechapel ITV News at Ten and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Great Night Out

00:05 00:10 01:15 02:10 02:35 03:30 04:00 04:25 05:50 06:15 07:10 08:00 08:05 08:35 09:00 09:30 10:00 11:05 11:35 12:00 13:00 13:05 13:35 13:55 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:50

Random Acts The Lost Hero of 9/11 Poker KOTV Boxing Weekly Beach Volleyball The Grid VW Racing Cup Triathlon Ironman 2013 Four Rooms The Hoobs Hugh's 3 Good Things According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory Undercover Boss USA Channel 4 News Summary Hugh's 3 Good Things Kirstie's Vintage Gems Breakfast at Tiffany's Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv How Not to Get Old Grand Designs The Last Leg I'm Spazticus

WHITECHAPEL New series. Return of the crime thriller, starring Rupert Penry­Jones. Chandler, Miles and the team investigate the murder of a man crushed to death by stones. As the killer's macabre methods become clearer, a second body is discovered and the detectives suspect the executions are being carried out by a witch hunter. However, their progress is impeded as links to 20th­century espionage attract attention from the security services. With Phil Davis and Steve Pemberton.

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:55 SuperCasino 05:00 Divine Designs 05:25 HouseBusters 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:30 Milkshake! Monkey 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Animal A&E 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Shattered Silence 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Animal A&E 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 The Hotel Inspector 21:00 Nurses 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Wentworth Prison

The Courier Thursday TV

September 5

00:35 02:20 02:25 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

00:20 01:20 02:20 02:50 05:00 05:50 07:00

The Edge of Love Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Don't Get Done, Get Dom Plan It, Build It Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show EastEnders Waterloo Road Celebrity MasterChef BBC News Regional News and Weather Who Do You Think You Are?

The Midwives Dara O Briain's Science Club The Culture Show This Is BBC Two Ask Lara Schools This Is BBC Two

07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 08:50 Plan It, Build It 09:20 The A to Z of TV Cooking 10:05 The Sheriffs Are Coming 11:05 Raymond Blanc: How to Cook Well 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Weakest Link 14:45 Mastermind 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Animal Park 16:30 Talking Pictures 17:15 How We Built Britain 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! Trade Secrets 20:30 Swansea Market 21:00 Hairy Bikers' Meals on Wheels Back on the Road 22:00 Mum and Dad Are Splitting Up 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 The Dales 01:00 Jackpot247 04:00 Columbo: Mind over Mayhem 05:15 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Star Treatment 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Storage Hoarders 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Long Lost Family 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Pat and Cabbage 22:00 The Guilty 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:35 Ade in Adland

THE GUILTY New series. Following an annual neighbourhood barbecue in a communal garden, Claire and Daniel Reid discover their four­year­old son Callum has gone missing, and a nationwide police search is launched, but the boy is not found. Five years later, as workmen repair a burst water main in the same garden, his body is unearthed, just a short distance from his home.

00:25 00:30 01:05 01:50 02:45 04:55 06:10 06:55 07:10 08:00 08:10 08:35 09:00 09:30 10:05 10:35 11:05 11:35 12:00 13:00 13:05 13:35 13:50 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00

Random Acts iTunes Festival 2013 Ramsay's Hotel Hell Shameless USA Vicky Donor Waterloo Road Countdown SuperScrimpers The Hoobs Hugh's 3 Good Things According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory Undercover Boss USA Channel 4 News Summary Hugh's 3 Good Things Kirstie's Vintage Gems Hellfighters Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv Location, Location, Location Educating Yorkshire Bouncers

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother 00:30 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:30 Poker 02:25 SuperCasino 05:00 Divine Designs 05:25 HouseBusters 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Milkshake! Monkey 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Meerkat Manor 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Miami 16:15 Inside Hollywood 16:20 McBride: Tune in for Murder 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Meerkat Manor 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Britain's Strangest Pets 21:00 The Railway: First Great Western 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 10 Things I Hate About

34

Friday, August 30, 2013

BOATS FOR SALE

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountancy needs in English; bookkeeping, taxes, wage slips and more.

We cater for companies and self­employed people; we can deal with everything for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

PROPERTY FOR RENT

ANIMALS Pet Travel UK family pet transporters Spain/UK. Travel with your pet for free.

All air conditioned vehicles (no vans) www.pettraveluk.co.uk UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644 (131)

BOATS FOR SALE GC15: 16m Guy Couach motor cruiser, 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, kitchen, lounge/dining area, and fly­ bridge. 2 x Mercedes 350kw diesel motors. 56000 €. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 A57: Rare Vintage 1957 Astondoa Classic Wooden motor launch, 10 m with Perkins diesel engine. All in working order. Needs TLC and re­varnish, great proj­ ect, 6000 €. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 .

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non­denomina­ tional church. Sunday serv­ ices 11am.

Children's church 11am. House groups

AIR CONDITIONING

Dunas. 10m x 3.5m.

Pontoon B. No G5 tax.

19,995€ 965 419 085 / 636 800 371 (130)

in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm.

Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nation­ alities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3.

Pilar de la Horadada.

Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer.

Home groups meet during the week. All welcome from any church background or none. For further information contact PilarChristian.

CommunityChurch@gmail.c om or contact Reverend Eddie on 966769300 or 650509606.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meetinghouse in the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597.

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

CARS FOR SALE

prehensive policies at the price of third party!

Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963

INSURANCE CASER SEGUROS ­ for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral.

Policies available in English and German.

Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.vil­ laandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apart­ ments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry sys­ tem. Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 616 493 487. (136) Ref: 61, A lovely two bed­ roomed ground floor apart­ ment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swim­ ming pool adjacent & all amenities in walking dis­ tance. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 33, Ground floor spa­ cious 2 bedroom apartment, located in Torre la Mata.

Close to all amenities and beach.

3 month rental €300pcm Call: 965 707 188 Ref: 104, 2 Bedroom apart­ ment in Torrevieja, (near gypsy lane), small balcony, near all amenities and Friday market. €350pcm

CARPENTER

MOORINGS Mooring for sale in Guardamar Marina, de las

ALARMS

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bed­ room detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, super­ market, restaurants and bars. Short term rental avail­ able. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 702: Beautiful 2 bed­ room apartment, located near los Locos beach, beau­ tifully furnished. Short term rentals from 175€ per week.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The proper­ ty overlooks a superb com­ munal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops.

Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Brand new 2 bed, furnished/ unfurnished / apartment.

Algorfa town centre, swim­ ming pool, rent €200/225 monthly or yearly advance €2400 + plus bills . 0044­ 7949­589­539 londonan­ gels@hotmail.com (134)

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED! Properties, all types, in the Torrevieja area wanted for long term rentals.

Call us on 96 692 3963 CBR32 : 3 bed, 2 bath apart­ ment in Los Montesinos, very spacious 120 m2, fully furnished, with pool on solarium, only 300 € p/m, available from beginning September, call now on 966 923 963

CBR31 : Town centre apart­ ment in Los Montesinos, with lift, lock up storeroom on solarium, all amenities nearby, spacious 2 bed 1 bath, 250 € p/m 966 923 963 El Chaparel/La Siesta Two bedroom apartment in a quiet gated urbanisation for rent €350 per month plus bills. Reference No 17 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bed­ room apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 RS110 : Immaculate detached villa for rent, 2 bedrooms & 2 bathrooms, closed carport for parking on plot, communal pool, no smokers or pets please, viewings from 4 Sept, 450 € pcm. Call 96 692 3963.

CBR27 – Ground floor apartment in closed luxury residential with beautiful communal gardens, pool, 2 beds 1 walk­in shower, redecorated this year. Only 250m walk to beach, inc.parking. 425€ pcm, call 966 923 963

PROPERTY FOR SALE Home and Contents cover ­ Comprehensive policies for house and contents with CASER Seguros ­ excellent prices for expats; policies available in. Call 966 923 963 for a quote.

Butia Espana Are you trapped. Need to sell quick.

We are the only answer for a speedy sale.UK buyers wait­ ing. www.butiaespana.com Telephone 0800 612 7514 or Spain 678 756 644 (131)

BARBER CAR HIRE

Busy bar/restaurant in San Javier, close to airport, sell­ ing up due to health prob­ lems. Loyal clientele, ideal location. Phone 634362820 for further information.

Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully com­

CATERING

CLEANERS

35

Friday, August 30, 2013 Rare opportunity to pur­ chase on Mediterrania III, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, Private Parking, F/Furnished, Large communal pools & Tennis courts S/W facing, Dramatically reduced for quick sale to 126.000 euros.

Ref No. K58 Call 627 711 155 for immediate viewing RS80 : Spanish style town­ house in Algorfa, totally reformed and redecorated, 110m2, 3 lrg.bedrooms, 1 bathroom, many extras, absolute bargain at 99,500 €, call now on 966 923 963 for no obligation viewing.

Ref: 510, €70,000.

Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the super­ markets, bars and restau­ rants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely Corner property in Novamar V, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms

Being sold fully furnished including appliances, Has secure underground parking and faces large oasis com­ munal pool. Walking dis­ tance to beach. 139.000 Euros, Call 627 711 155 and quote Ref No. K10 Ref: 104 Lovely 2 Bedroom Apartment, close to Shops, walking distance to Friday Market and Town Centre and the beach. The property is close to the Habaneres Shopping Centre and Aquapark. Recently refur­ bished apartment in a good central location.

Conveniently situated for all the facilities of this modern vibrant town, and only a few blocks away from Torreviejas excellent sea front with its abundant cafes, restaurants and shops. Price €43950 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. BRJ1 – 1 bedroom top floor renovated apartment in San Luis. Great sea and

CAR BREAKERS

lake views. 55.000 €. Tel. 966 923 963 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant.

Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods.

Walking distance to all local amenities and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bungalow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles.

It is close to supermarkets, bars, restaurants and is on the local bus route. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Kitchen with Galleria, Secure underground park­ ing, Gas Central Heating, Glazed in Porch, Solarium with stunning views.

Viewings absolutely essen­ tial. Very large property at reduced price of 190.000 euros. Ref No. K38 Call 627 711 155

Opportunity to purchase at the off plan price of 195.000 euros. Large 4 Bed, 3 Bath Brand new property. Secure underground parking for 2 cars and communal pool.

Situated opposite Gran Alacant and over looks pro­ jected golf course. Ref No. K52. 627 711 155 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully furnished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 com­ munal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant commercial centre. Situated in the popu­ lar urbanisation of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought

HOUSE / BAR CLEARANCE

after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005.

Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge­Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg.

Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Town House with a difference.

2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons.

Greenland Views and all local amenities close by.

Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242 Ref: 520, €80,000. Two bed­ room apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed­in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large commu­ nal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant immaculate villa, 3 bedroomed, 3 bath­ roomed property maintained to a very high standard inside and out and the interi­ or furnishings are top quali­ ty, offering a feeling of luxury and good taste. The plot size is 400m2 and has been beautifully tiles, and grav­ eled and has established palms and plants. Oil fired

central heating throughout, log effect fire place, ceiling fans in all rooms, towel heater rails, glazed in show­ er units, instant hot water, water purifier, free English TV, phone & internet lines, fitted double hanging wardrobes, safe, glazed in front porch, vanity units and much more. The pool is an 8 X 4 m2 salt water pool, meaning maintenance is much easier plus outside toilet and shower. Sea views to front with Greenland views to the rear. ref K51. €245,000 Tel 680333242 Ref 533: Lovely 2 bedroom duplex located in the popu­ lar area of Punta Prima, the property has a large lounge and fully equipped kitchen, 2 double bedrooms, one with balcony, bathroom with dou­ ble shower. €126,000 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 513, €115,000. Two bedroom ground floor apart­ ment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities includ­ ing the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

36

Friday, August 30, 2013

Top floor Duplex. Very good price of 108.000 euros for a quick sale. Furnished to a very high standard, 2 bed­ rooms, 1 bathroom, Lounge Diner, Glazed in Porch, Large Roof Top Solarium.

Choice of Communal Pools, Private Parking. Walking distance to all amenities and on the First urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant.

Viewing essential. Ref No. K44. Tel. 627 711 155 Balsares is opposite Gran Alacant where the proposed golf course is now being started so this property will virtually be on the golf course, it is an investment not to be missed. The prop­ erty is on a small gated urbanisation of 18 houses with private underground parking for 2 cars and direct access to the house, com­ munal pool and toilets/changing rooms etc.

The house is brand new and consists of 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, lounge with working fire place, large kitchen 12 m2, large galle­ ria/ utility room, bedroom balcony and front tiled ter­ race. This property also has a converted under build for an extra lounge or bedroom. ref K52 €198,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off­road parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool near­ by. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1

bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach.

There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant Opportunity to purchase a beautiful 3 bed­ roomed, 3 bathroomed,large kitchen, detached property with roof­ top solarium. Well established gardens and drive way for 2 cars, whilst also overlooking the project­ ed 18 hole golf course.

Comprising of fitted wardrobes, utility room, air con H/C, alarm system, electric wall heaters, inter­ com system, fireplace, ceil­ ings fans, 8x7 gazebo, use of 2 large communal pools, immaculate condition with many extras. ref K12. €180,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant bargain, detached villa with pool on 400m2 plot. Briefly compris­ ing of 3 bedrooms, 3 bath­ rooms, Lounge Diner, inde­ pendent kitchen, solarium with views, well maintained gardens. Quiet location yet within walking distance of all amenities. Top quality furni­ ture and appliances includ­ ed in the price. Extras include, mosquito nets, grills, toldos blinds, built in wardrobes, gas fire, electric heating, ceiling fans, English & Spanish TV, tastefully tiled & graveled garden with irri­ gation system. ref K43. €229,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: KP3100, €183,000.

Three bedroom, two bath­ room detached villa, located

MAN AND A VAN

in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool.

Garage to side of house.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant South facing attractive corner house Situated in the sought after urbanization of Monte Faro, this secure gated urbaniza­ tion offers a stunning oasis pool, with mountain views, tennis courts and football courts. Consisting of 3 dou­ ble beds with balconies, 2 bathrooms, kitchen leading onto court yard which can easily be converted into an extra room, lounge diner with working fireplace, front garden with private parking for 2 cars. Being sold fully furnishes with white goods, built in 2006 so immaculate condition hardly lived in. Ref K48 €168,000 priced for quick sale Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant Limited edition bungalow. Only six of this type available in Gran Alacant. Constructed in 2003 and immaculately maintained on a large plot size of 500m2 with a 10 x 5 pool.Comprising of 3 bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge­diner leading out onto front porch, independ­ ent kitchen including white goods, outside galleria, court yard, large garage with electric door, roof top solari­ um and private parking. Also built in wardrobes, Toldos blinds, air con H/C, security grills, alarm, security doors, bathrooms heaters, outside toilet, outdoor lighting, irriga­ tion system, attractive and well kept gardens, beautiful­ ly tiled inside and out, fire place, English TV, phone

line. Being sold with top quality furniture. ref L95. €275,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant South facing attractive corner house Situated in the sought after urbanization of Monte Faro, this secure gated urbaniza­ tion offers a stunning oasis pool, with mountain views, tennis courts and football courts. Consisting of 3 dou­ ble beds with balconies, 2 bathrooms, kitchen leading onto court yard which can easily be converted into an extra room, lounge diner with working fireplace, front garden with private parking for 2 cars. Being sold fully furnishes with white goods, built in 2006 so immaculate condition hardly lived in. Ref K48 €168,000 priced for quick sale Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Ground floor south west facing apartment in Puerto Marino close to G.A commercial centre, comprising of 2 Bedrooms, 1 Bathroom, Lounge­Diner, Independent Kitchen with Galleria, Porch area and large tiled front garden, The property is being sold fully furnished and includes all kitchen appliances, H & C Air con is fitted as well as sky TV. The apartment enjoys the use of 2 large communal pools and has private parking in an enclosed electronically gated car park.

Competitively priced for a quick sale. Ref. K40 €91,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant beautiful detached villa with very large pool and within walk­ ing distance to the Gran Alacant Commercial Centre.

PETS

This villa comprised of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, lounge­diner, Independent kitchen, roof top storage, solarium, porch & terrace.

Large private pool, BBQ area, established gardens and private terraces, Private Parking, Solarium with Views to Alicante. 450m2 plot, fully furnished including white goods. Located in very quiet desirable road. ref.L96. €255,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant Gem! Fabulous detached Villa, with Alicante sea views to the front and wood land views to the rear, means this immaculate villa is very pri­ vate and un­overlooked.

Comprising of 2 large bed­ rooms with fitted wardrobes, 2 bath, large fully equipped kitchen,glazed porch sitting area, solarium, Attractive Pool with cover, well main­ tained Gardens. Central Heating, Air Con, Ceiling fans, Private Parking, Alarm system, Decorative working Fire Place complete with electric Fire. Outdoor work­ shop/storage area, Quality Pergola & BBQ. Constructed in 2006, on plot size of 380m2 and being sold fully furnished including white goods. ref L80. €234,995 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Rare invest­ ment!! corner south facing opportunity on Novamar urbanisation.This immacu­ late ground floor duplex has been kept and maintained to a very high standard inside and out the position is fan­ tastic, enjoys views over the lovely oasis communal pool, surrounded by lawned gar­ dens. Comprising of plot

size 100m2 Build Size 90m2, 2 bedrooms, 2 bath­ rooms, fully furnished, Anti­ Glare Windows, Security Door, Security Grills, Built­in Wardrobes, Extra Storage, Galleria, Electric Panel Heaters, Heated Towel Rails, Air Con (h&c), Ceiling.

Fans. Thermo Shower, Vanity Units and decorative­ ly tiled throughout, exquisite garden, Underground pri­ vate parking.

Ref.K10 €139,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the central area of Gran Alacant and within walking distance to all local ameni­ ties such as a selection of different cuisine restaurants, bars, pharmacies, banks, popular GA market and Carabassi Beach.

Comprises of 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms with a private garage and roof­top solari­ um. This property is part of a small urbanization which has the use of a large deco­ rative communal pool. Ref. K36 €149,000 Tel 680333242 Ground floor duplex, with splendid views. Quiet loca­ tion in Gran Alacant.

Immaculate condition. Price has just been reduced to 105.000 and includes every­ thing. For viewing call 627 711 155 Ref. No K27 Gran Alacant detached villa with converted under build and pool. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge­ Diner, Front Porch, Large Solarium, decorative­ ly tiled, Irrigated Garden.

BBQ and Log Storage Cupboard. Raised walls for Privacy. Also many extras, toldos blinds, freshly deco­

PERSONAL

POOL TABLES

PLUMBERS

POOLS

DAMP PROOFING

DRAINAGE

37

Friday, August 30, 2013 rated interior, Grills, Mosquito Nets, Air Con H/C, Ceiling Fans, Log Burner Fire, Electric Radiators, Heated Towel Rails, Alarmed, Phone Line, Satellite UK TV, private parking. Plot size 310m2 under build 100m2. price includes all furniture.The under build consists of 2 beds, lounge, kit/utility room. ref L79. €250,000 Tel. 680333242 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bed­ room apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed­in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large commu­ nal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant immaculate outstanding south facing villa in sought after road. Set on a 350m2 plot with 4 bed­ rooms, 3 baths,large porch, solarium and terraces. The large under build includes a lounge, kitchen, bedrooms, bathroom and patio doors leading to pool area. Internal & external access for under build. Extras include electric radiators, air con H/C, ceil­ ing fans, gas fire, heated towel rails, extended walk­in shower, fitted wardrobes.

Decorative tiling inside and out.

Panoramic views towards Alicante Bay, Sky

TV, phone line and Internet & Private parking, estab­ lished gardens, water fea­ tures and fruit trees. Being sold with exquisite furniture and all white goods.

Immaculate finishes and decor. ref L84. €278,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Large detached villa with beautiful gardens set on 550m2 plot, built in BBQ area and large 10x6 pool.Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge Diner with fire place, Independent Kitchen, air con H/C, Solarium, front porch, converted under build with 3 extra rooms, private covered parking, irrigated gardens, close distance to beach and amenities. Ref. K18 €250,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lounge­diner, independent kitchen, full roof­top solari­ um with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the glass is mirrored. Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bedroomed, 4th floor apartment, offers

SURVEYOR

STORAGE

luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / living room and includes all electrical appli­ ances & furniture also there is a utility room, open ter­ race, and private parking.

The urbanisation also offers many communal pools, ten­ nis courts, restaurants and bars. Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant villa located in a very quiet area , situated at the end of a cul­de­sac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gar­ dens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,pri­ vate parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref.

L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242 Beach front Line property, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more.

125.000 Euros Ref No. K23.

Tel. 627 711 155

Gran Alacant, Situated front line to the famous blue flag beaches of Carabassi, the real beauty of this property is its proximity to the beach, but also on offer is a fantas­ tic communal pool situated in beautifully kept gardens with little Spanish walk ways.Comprising of 2 bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge diner, American style kitchen including all appliances, roof top solarium with stunning views, front porch area with front garden and a secure underground garage. fully furnished Ref. K23 €125,000 rare opportunity Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant limited edition villa, not very often available on the market. Only a few of this type were ever con­ structed­ Very large 5 bed­ rooms, 4 bathroom(2 en­ suit) property, situated on a large corner plot with a 10 x 5 private pool and private parking. Lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully equipped kitchen with utility room. Large landing area, leading onto solarium, with extra storage external room.

Front porch area leading into large well established gardens with irrigation sys­ tem and fruit trees. Being sold fully furnished. Within walking distance to Gran

RAG AND BONE

REMOVALS

VAN HIRE

Alacant commercial centre and 5 minute drive to Carabassi beaches. ref.

K11. €270,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant large detached villa with 3 double bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge­diner, fully equipped kitchen, large porch, roof top solarium, 400 m2 Plot, with established low mainte­ nance very private gardens with irrigation system, elec­ tronic gates, private parking, outside wc, sink & shower, terraces, air con ( h & c ), mosquito nets, grills, alarmed, large spa pool with separate Jacuzzi section.

Within easy walking dis­ tance to Gran Alacant com­ mercial centre and close to local bus and tram route.

Ref K33. €260,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, detached villa in desirable road close to all amenities, comprising of 3 double bedrooms, 3 baths, lounge diner with working fire place, brand new kitchen with all appliances and black granite work tops, private pool, plot of 550m2, established irrigated gar­ dens and fruit trees, private parking, solarium, also there is a converted under build giving more bedrooms ,bathroom & kitchen, this house has many extras and is being sold fully furnished.

Ref.k47. €280,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant south­facing, very private villa, with wood­ land and Alicante views.

Situated at the end of a small cul­de­sac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,workshop and stor­ age in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of out­ side parking also. Due to its orientation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very important in the winter months. Ref.K24. €237,000 Tel 680333242

QUIZZES Experienced quiz­ master/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars.

Tel:­ 664 838 581

REMOVALS Move It Now Small removals and deliveries.

Spain/UK Budget prices.

Last minute jobs undertak­ en. www.moveitnow.co.uk Telephone UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644 (131)

SITUATIONS VACANT RADIO COSTA INTERNA­ TIONAL needs motivated sellers. Spanish, English and German language is a bonus but not essential.

Training and good earnings guaranteed. For more info call 644 126 600 or email info@radicocostainterna­ tional.com Medaesthetics require a Beautician. Must have NVQ Level 3 and working self employed email cv to sabinebrooks@hotmail.com

SOLICITORS Need English speaking solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your prob­ lems with debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor today

WIG SPECIALIST SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer dif­ ferent Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are wel­ come to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

WANTED

38

Friday, August 30, 2013

Greenside Gossip IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

MASH, CHIP, ROAST OR BOIL… BUT DON’T SHOUT! SEVE TROPHY The worst phrase in golf used to be “It’s still your turn”. Then it became “Buggies on the path”, before American golf fans came up with “Mashed Potatoes”, and now the worst of the lot, “IN THE HOLE!” Can someone please make it stop?

Over recent months, it has gotten louder and louder, even on a 600 yard Par 5 they shout it on the Tee shot, and they are almost always being bellowed by a young thirty­ something with his shirt outside his trouser and sixth beer in his hand, and are the irritating descendants of the godfather of all screams “You Da Man”. That may have been amusing for a few days or maybe a week and it may have been started in the distant days of Fred Couples wearing his Ashworth shirts and Oxford saddle golf shoes, back when he was considered cooler than cool and every­ body wanted to be part of the show. Soon everybody was “Da Man”, as it became the recurring chant at every golf tournament. Regardless of the player or the event, somebody out on the fair­ ways was “You Da Man” even if they missed the greens or getting the Ian Poulter laser look. Soon though, “You Da Man” lost its appeal and went the way of vinyl records. Now we are forced with its loathsome off­ spring, which practically drowns out the dulcet tones of Sky’s Ewan Murray and

Bruce Critchley.

“It’s very annoying” says Carl Petersson, who’s as easy to get along with as an ice cream sundae. “I don’t think anybody enjoys it” Except possibly the person who is shouting it and who probably set up his Sky HD box so that he can play it back and listen to himself shouting at a golf ball. That’s what happens when you can­ not get a date! We are in the age of social networking, Facebook and Twitter, and we know what that means: ­ the ease of drawing attention to yourself! That is the bril­ liance of these internet cre­ ations, tapping into part of us that says “Hey! Look at me”.

After nearly every shot there is some who shouts “Mashed Potatoes”,

TITTER ON THE TEE The lady golfer was a determined, if not very proficient player. At each swing she made at the ball, earth flew in all directions.

"Gracious me," she exclaimed red­faced to her Golf Pro, "The worms will think there's an earthquake."

"I don't know," replied the Golf Pro, "The worms round here are very clever. Most of them are hiding underneath your ball for safety."

“Yabadabadoo” or more common “In The Hole”. It’s not that people do not under­ stand golf distractions but a few years ago in the States, and a PGA Tour event on a Par 3, 17th at the Forest Oaks Country Club, there was golf’s version of a stag and hen party. It was so noisy and everyone was so full of booze that the conces­ sion stands had to be moved to cut down on the commo­ tion. Eventually this Par 3 became just another quiet hole, and the tournament was also moved.

It’s great when fans are involved at golf tournaments and it needs to be fun, like when Bubba Watson and Ian Poulter wave to the crowd on the first tee in the Ryder Cup, asking them to keep up the jet engine roar while they wellie another tee shot, it’s fun.

When an opponent receives the same treatment it’s terrific.

But and a BIG but, it’s that one voice, that one person who can ruin a good time.

Ian Poulter said in a Tweet:­“We should be allowed to take 10,000 volt tasers onto the course and taser

ever Muppet who shouts out something stupid. I would laugh then.” When a clown shouted “Mashed Potato” at Graeme McDowell in last year’s World Challenge, G­ Mac responded with a subtle gesture and a muttered com­ ment. Some of the Tour play­ ers consider it more annoy­ ing on TV, than when actually playing, but my guess it’s really annoying out there too!

Another Tweet from Poults (@IanJamesPoulter) includ­ ed this message: ­ “This baba boo stuff and mashed potato crap shouting wouldn’t happen at Augusta or The Open nor would it happen at Wimbledon.

Taser the thrushes” Poults is correct about Augusta. It may possibly happen once but not a sec­ ond time, another reason to appreciate the US Masters at Augusta. Golf is not soccer with its hooligans. It has its traditions of etiquette, so let’s keep it that way!

Did anyone note the pas­ sion and noise made by the fans at the Solheim Cup? Fantastic but no stupid shouts during shots­ you can be passionate at golf and still show respect. Tasering the guilty is maybe going a bit too far, so make them watch the Jeremy Kyle Show over and over again!

Spain’s José María Olazábal and Sam Torrance of Scotland have been named as the captains for The Seve Trophy presented by Golf+. Paul McGinley, the current European Ryder Cup Captain, selected the duo to lead the respective Continental Europe and Great Britain and Ireland teams in the newly­named contest – formerly the Vivendi Seve Trophy – which will be played at St­Nom­La Bretèche Golf Club in France from October 3­6.

The Parisian venue has hosted the past two events, with GB&I winning both of those and will defend the tro­ phy after McGinley himself led them to a 15½­12½ vic­ tory two years ago. Olazábal and Torrance will bring a wealth of experience to the captaincy positions, not least for the fact they have both enjoyed the special thrill of being a winning Ryder Cup captain; Torrance leading Europe to a memorable 15 ½ ­ 12 ½ triumph at The Belfry in 2002, while Olazábal was the architect of the sensational ‘Miracle at Medinah’ last September where Europe recovered from a 10­6 deficit going into the final day singles to win 14 ½ ­ 13 ½.

Olazábal, who will undertake his second stint as cap­ tain in the contest, having been at the helm at The Wynyard Club in 2005 when his side went down to Colin Montgomerie’s GB&I team, said: “Everyone knew my relationship with Seve, through both The Ryder Cup and this contest, and therefore to be part again of team golf again will be great. It’s always good to see players in a match play format and it is a great experience for them. It benefitted my Ryder Cup team and we will have a group of players in France with the potential to play in the next Ryder Cup and beyond.”

Sam Torrance, the GB&I captain, said: “It’s a great honour. It’s been 11 years since I took charge of The Ryder Cup team and so you can imagine I’m really looking forward to this – it’s tremendous.” Aside from his Ryder Cup captaincy success at The Belfry in 2002, Sam was also part of three winning European Ryder Cup teams and is the man who holds the record for the most European Tour appearances in history with 706.

KNOW YOUR RULES Question: ­ A player who started the game with 13 clubs and broke his putter in anger, i.e., other than in the normal course of play, during the first nine holes. He bought another putter from the Pro shop after the first nine and used it for the remainder of the round. Rule 4­3a (iii) permits replacing a club only if it becomes unfit for play in the normal course of play. Was the player subject to a penalty?

A. No. Since he started with 13 clubs, he was entitled to add another club under Rule 4­4a.

B. Yes. Because he broke the club in anger.

C. Yes. One stroke penalty.

Answer. A. Since he started with only 13 clubs he’s entitled to add another club under Rule 4­4a.

39

Friday, August 30, 2013

NO WAY, JOSE!

No goals with more mysterious mouves from the mouth The master of manipulation and man­ management managed it again on Monday against mighty Manchester United, success­ fully stopping any scoring, but boring, adding to a strange starting selection.

Almost instantly discarding Rafa’s Europa Cup­winning team, the tree at the Bridge has been shaken, and there’s a few fallers.

If your faded face fits, fine: if not forget it!

The Chelsea Pensioners have been reassembled in defence around Mourinho’s main man, club­captain­controversial John Terry. Behind him, Dad’s Army private Petr Cech persists in goal, together with tried and trusted full backs ‘El Bow’ Ivanovic and Cole­the­diver, with capable Gary Cahill cov­ ering his Cap’n Mainwaring . The vague presence of evergreen Frank Lampard in midfield stays alongside established classy newbies Eden Hazard and Oscar. Pero,

senor Jose­ donde estas Los Espanoles?

Torres, Mata, Azpilicueta? What’s the Mata with Chelsea’s gem of last year? And where’s last year’s fixture Brazilian star David Luiz ­ and recalled Romelu Lukako plus Dynamic Djemba Ba – all no way, Jose? They were all by­passed by the Portuguese’s own two starting newbies upfront, Kevin De Bruyne and Andre Schurrle. But of course, the man knows exactly what he’s doing, and apart from the odd scary moment (that Welbeck fluffed) it worked well against United. £64 million question – did Mou’s goading challenge, his roose of rousing wayward Wayne to action – i.e. put up or shut up – misfire, and lead the Likely Lad back to Old Trafford? Banners proclaiming ‘The Wanted One’ meant much on the night, to accompa­ ny other Theatre of Dreams signs proclaim­

Elche got their first La Liga point last Saturday night at home to Real Sociedad in a one­all draw, yet created chances that might have got them all three. With over 26 thousand supporters packed into Elche’s Manuel Martinez Valero stadium to witness the return of top flight soccer, they were quickly rewarded after just 2 minutes when a low cross from Edu Albacar wreaked havoc on the Sociedad defence and trickled over towards the far post, where Corominas bundled the ball home. It was not the pretti­ est of goals, but with it being Elche's first goal in the Primera Division for 24 years, few of their fans would have cared. Alberto Botia was inches away from doubling the hosts' lead on 25 minutes, heading a free­kick just wide of the near post after Bravo failed to collect the cross.

With the visitors showing little signs of get­ ting back into the game a quarter of an hour into the second half, coach Jagoba Arrasate turned to Prieto and Zurutuza, bringing them

on for Ruben Pardo and Gonzalo Castro respectively within the space of 10 minutes.

Their arrival kick­started a Sociedad revival.

First Vela made Elche goalkeeper Manu Herrera stretch to stop his shot and then the equaliser arrived, in which both sub­ stitutes played a key part. Zurutuza found a gap in the defence for Prieto, who crossed towards Vela and although the for­ mer Arsenal man did not strike the ball cleanly, it ended up in the far corner of the net.

Vela then nearly grabbed the winner, striking the bar from 25 yards out, but the hosts rode out the 90 minutes to claim their first point of the season. Elche have a late night date away to fellow promoted side, Almeria, in an 11pm kick off tonight (Friday).

At the top, Barcelona had a one­nil win at Malaga on Sunday, whilst Real Madrid secured the same scoreline at Granada on Monday night. Real play this Sunday lunchtime at home to Bilbao, whilst in the evening, Barcelona travel to Valencia.

ELCHE OFF THE MARK

Messi misses but Barca win Barcelona won a record 11th Spanish Super Cup on away goals on Wednesday night as they drew 0­0 with Atletico Madrid after Lionel Messi's late penalty miss.

Having earned a 1­1 draw with Diego Simeone's side in the first leg, Barca were subdued and Messi out of sorts.

And they were indebted to goal­ keeper Victor Valdes, who saved shots from Arda Turan and David Villa. Atletico lost their discipline late on as Filipe Luis saw red before Pedro was tripped for Messi's spot­ kick. The 89th­minute penalty award for a challenge by Miranda appeared harsh but Argentine Messi sent his spot­kick against the crossbar.

The drama did not end there as Turan was sent off for protesting against the referee's decision, despite already having been sub­ stituted. Luis's card came after he appeared to swing an arm at Dani Alves nine minutes from the end.

ing new leader David Moyes is ‘The Chosen One’. Rooney was at last starting the match in front of 75,000, back to his faithful, forgiv­ ing flock, where he once again melted their hearts with a stirring man­of­the match per­ formance ­ to glowing appreciation from both sets of fans. It takes a special player to earn joint acclaim from two passionate rivals, made all the more puzzling when United couldn’t previously seem to find a regular place for Rooney ­ unlike his country and arguably their biggest rivals who wanted him. For now, it seems the Prodigal One is staying put, straying not from

Old Trafford, as seemed inevitable at one time. Great for United, also armed with a frightening array of for­ ward talent sitting on the sidelines: Kagawa, Yo u n g , Zaha, Giggs,

Hernandez, Januzaj. Has David Moyes managed magnificently now, as he’s presided over a ‘united’ team event, watch­ ing a rejuvenated Rooney on Monday evening, and thus cement his new position at the helm of the Red Devils?

But amid all the United euphoria of Rooney’s remaining Chelsea are still top, albeit from having played three to everyone bar Villa’s two. This week Mou bought the 25 year old attacking midfielder Willian from Anzhi Makhachkala on a five­year deal, pay­ ing £30m for the Brazil international after Chelsea trailing him for two years. He was snatched from under the noses of Tottenham, who will have their nasal protu­ berances well put out of joint as Mourinho rubbed it in at the press conference announcing the acquisition. It looks like Roman Abramovich got together in the pub with Anzhi’s Russian boss Suleyman Kerimov and sealed it over a vodka or two. Jose clearly needs a new class striker, current­ ly there is no talisman like Didier Drogba at the Bridge to dig Chelsea out when the Blues are in trouble.

In Prague tonight, as hold­ ers of the Europa Cup, Chelsea take on mighty Bayern Munich, winners of the Champions League to contest the EUFA Super Cup: but masterful Mourinho will be using the match to test his latest blend of old and new.

Torry dominate draw FC Torrevieja opened up their league campaign with a nil­nil draw at home to La Nucia. Torrevieja dominated a lot of the pos­ session but lacked their extra edge up front to find the net. New signing Eric had the best of the first half chances, whilst Alberto had a couple of opportunities to score against his former side, in an entertaining match watched by around 500 spectators. A number of players were missing from the Torrevieja team includ­ ing the suspended Vicente Boix and defender Alexis, whose paperwork has yet

RICH HITTER

Elche have boosted their firepower by bagging Ghanaian striker, Richmond Boakye, on a one year loan from Juventus. The 20 year old has been farmed out by the Italians to get some more first team experience, with reports suggesting that Elche have paid a quarter of a million Euros for his services. He spent last season on loan at Sassuolo in Italy’s Serie B, where he banged in 11 goals to hand them automatic promotion to the Italian top­flight.

to arrive from Mexico. The club have also made their final signing for their cam­ paign, by securing the services of 19 year old midfielder, Dani Lucas, who has joined the club from Valencia Mestalla.

Torrevieja travel to Llosa this Sunday for a noon kick­off against a side that won their opener last weekend at Castellon. La Liga new boys, Elche, come to the Vicente Garcia Stadium next Friday night (September 6th) for a spe­ cial friendly that kicks­off at 7.00pm, with entry at 10 Euros and free admission for children under 16.

Friday, August 30, 2013

40

A WARM WELCOME NO CHANCE FOR IN WALES? PELLEGRINI’S BOYOS!

They'll keep a welcome in the hill­ side, They'll keep a welcome in the Vales, But if you come down to Cardiff, Then you’ll get stuffed in Wales.

While the other two biggies were preparing to scrap it out between ‘em on Monday evening, the first major casualty of the Prem’s Big Three came unexpectedly at Cardiff on Sunday. Expensively­ assembled Manchester City, of whom fanciful feats are forecast were brought crashing back down to planet earth ­ well, South Wales ­ by newly­promoted Cardiff. Huge happy hiraeth (look it up) greeted the win as Manchester United reject Frazier Campbell grabbed two goals directly from corners in eight euphoric min­ utes, and collected all the headlines after an Edin Dzecko blast had appeared to put City on their way.

This was soon equalized by cool Icelandic Aron Gunnarrson, and although City appeared to have more of the play, manager of the Red/Bluebirds, Malky Mackay was quick to point out how much the Welsh

John McGregor reports

club’s Fort­Knox type home strength played in last year’s Championship­winning promotion. City’s woe could be blamed on keeping bad Kompany (injury, poor replacement midfielder Javi Garcia), or pointing to the easy target of Hart­rending goalkeeping errors, but to score three against a side like City – well, take the plaudits, Malky’s men. Now then, boyos: Everton are coming to fortress Cardiff Saturday – we’ll soon see if City manager Pellegrini’s sour assertion of his team’s bad defending had caused their defeat, or are Cardiff the new special sparklers in Swales – who would also have been unneighbourly delighted that the Swans lost at Hull.

Algebraic football test. What does 2 (2 x 1 ­ 0) = 6 mean? Answer: both Liverpool and Tottenham have played two, won two, both 1 ­ 0, and have six points each, to sit second equal in the Prem, albeit after only two games. ‘Who­needs­him?’ Liverpool are starring with Belgian (another one!) Mignolet’s significant saves and Sturridge’s quicksilver feet. Against valiant Villa, Twinkletoes tweaked it in so fast you could hardly spot it. Similarly, Spurs Soldado (now scored 9 from 11) looks the answer to Baled­out transfers (psst – GB’s gone AWOL en Espana), especially with that new

Brazilian magician Paulinho, have you seen his tricks?

Both teams of triers have got mountains to climb though on Super Sunday to stay superior and not lose.

Liverpool take on their most reviled rivals Man United at Anfield ­ and talking of yer’ worst enemies, at the Emirates Tottenham take on lately­livened­up Arsenal ­ Gooners were seen singing in the rain (well, it is August) as it persistently­hissed­it­down at Craven Cottage. Something’s gotta give in North London.

Down among the deadmen, it’s Crystal Palace against Sunderland Saturday, now nil points v one ­ savage six pointer? As Newcastle niggle nervously near the bot­ tom, Yohan Cabaye refuses to come out to play ­ and Fulham are coming Saturday, who beat similarly­suf­ fering Sunderland in week one. The Saints go march­ ing in: sixth place, one win, one draw and now visit a Norwich side that haven’t got it together – yet.

Wolfwhistle didn’t score this week and the Canaries copped a cruel ‘un to give Hull their first win. No time for the Tigers to relax though, as Man City are licking their wounds ready to avenge their Wales woes.

Similar to Southampton are West Ham, who’ve started well ­ and with a visit from stuttering Stoke, Saturday might go even better.