The Loafer April 5th

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Thirsty Orange Brew Off Running of The Beers Dollywood Festival of Nations

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The Deerslayer 5k

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THIRSTY ORANGE Brew Extravaganza

Volume 30 • Issue #18

happenings

Publisher Luci Tate Editor Graphic Arts Director Don Sprinkle Cover Design Bill May Advertising Dave Carter Terry Patterson Lori Howell Beth Jinks-Ashbrook Patti Barr Contributing Staff Jim Kelly Andy Ross Ken Silvers Mark Marquette Brian McManus Joshua Hicks Brian Bishop Distribution Jerry Hanger Teresa Hanger Published by Pulse Publishing, LLC., P.O. Box 3238, Johnson City, TN 37602 Phone: 423/283-4324 FAX - 423/283-4369

columns & reviews 16

Batteries Not Included - Welcome To Ladders

Thirsty Orange

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DJ Allen Rockhouse Is Back

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TN Championship Of Beers

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JCCT Presents The Glass Menagerie

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One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest

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Early Bird Tickets Now for Hops & Howlers

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Dalí Quartet Performs

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Under The Streetlamp at NPAC

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Grammy Award Winning Bands To Headline Bllue Plum

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Sister Sadie At Heartwood

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Singers Of United Lands

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Historical Monuments From Legos Contest Murder Mystery Caravan in “Home Sweet Homicide”

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Stargazer - Leo The Lion Roars In Night Sky

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21

Skies This Week

32 Things To Do

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Screen Scenes - Batman v Superman

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Classifieds

24 Trivial Traveler - Farewell To An Arm

www.theloaferonline.com info@theloaferonline.com

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Lock, Stock & Barrel - Talking Targets Pt. 1

e-mail: editorial@theloaferonline.com (editorial) adcopy@theloaferonline.com (advertising)

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Mountain Movers - The John Gardner Interview

31

Pets of the Week

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Kelly’s Place - You Have (Too Much) Mail

All advertisements are accepted and

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published by the publisher upon the representation that the agency and/or advertiser is authorized to publish the entire contents and subject matter thereof.

The agency and/or advertiser will indemnify and save the publisher harmless from any loss of expense resulting from claims or suits based upon contents of any advertisement, including claims or suits for defamation, libel, right of privacy, plagiarism, and copyright infringement.

Founder: Bill Williams

Photo credit: Jason and Daniel Worley

SETH THOMAS

at Sonny’s Marina & Cafe Friday, April 8th

music & fun 18

Spotlight - Great Music & Fun Times

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Puzzle Page

theloaferonline.com | April 5, 2016 | 3

Official Guide:

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2016

et beer lovers rejoice – the 5th Annual Thirsty Orange Brew Extravaganza is this weekend at Founder’s Park in Johnson City.

The festival – on Saturday, April 9th – features local and regional professional brewers, as well as numerous home brewers ready to sample their brews to a thirsty crowd.

Thirsty Orange – ranked as a Top 5 Festival by Beer Yeti – is the premier spring craft beverage sampling event in the Triciites, and some would say the region. As the home of the Tennessee Championship of Beers – the festival brings some of the best of craft beer and cider, with folks vying for a Medal as well as your approval.

“We started out to make a festival that created a more educated craft beverage consumer in the Tricities. Five years later, people of this region recognize good beer and cider – and now those breweries and ciders are excited to let festival-goers be the first to sample their latest creations,” said organizer Stephanie Carson.

The new location has also enabled festival organizers to expand their footprint in terms of entertainment and vendors. The festival will include several more vendors selling everything from beer Koozies to beer bracelets to Fairy Hair. Smoky Mountain Growlers will also be on site, showcasing their high-quality growlers that can keep brew cold for up to three days.

There are also several businesses looking to showcase their products and services. This year Culligan Water of Johnson City is offering every person a free bottle of water as they enter and providing water for filling stations around the venue. Wireless Express of Johnson City will be on site with a charging station for folks who’ve run down their battery “facebooking” about all the great craft beer.

For entertainment, Johnson City’s homeboy DJ Allen Rockhouse is back – as well as jugglers, slack lining, hula hooping and much more. Media sponsors Holston Valley Broadcasting and WJHL-TV will be on site with on-air talent to support the event.

Members of the Tricities Brewer’s Guild will be represented – including Bristol Brewery, Depot Street Brewing, Holston River Brewing, Johnson City Brewing, JRH Brewing, Sleepy Owl Brewery, Studio Brew, Yee Haw Brewery and Gypsy Circus Cider Company.

In addition – several almost 20 additional regional brands will be there – including Title Sponsor Shock Top. And while in year’s past what the breweries were bringing was a surprise until the day of, this year you can find out the selection on the festival website – www.thirstyorange.com.

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THirsty orange brew extravaganza

“We’re incredibly proud of our unique selection. We ask the brewers and cideries to bring their best and most unique offerings and they deliver in a big way. Folks can come and sample beers and ciders you can’t get anywhere else, or that are new to the market,” said Carson.

If the festival selection has your head-spinning and unsure of where to start – Tri-Cities Brew Tours are offering free tours around the festival, with a chance to sample and educate yourself at the same time.

This year the festival is expanding its signature Mixology Bar with the help of Universal Wine & Spirits. The store, now with two locations in Johnson City, will offer fresh ingredients to enhance the flavor of the beers offered. Additionally, manager Matt Greene and his team have created Beer Cocktails to offer folks who visit their tent.

A portion of the proceeds from Thirsty Orange are donated to the Overmountain Chapter of Trout Unlimited, an organization dedicated to improving and maintaining the health of the streams and rivers, and the wildlife in them.

At presstime, First Pour tickets ($60 each) were very close to selling out, but there are a limited number of Grand Tasting tickets available – for $45 in advance of the festival and $50 on the day of. Tickets can be purchased at www.thirstyorange.com The morning of Thirsty Orange will be the Inaugural Running of the Beers (and Ciders!). The run, sponsored

by Gypsy Circus Cidery Company will circle the circumference of Founder’s Park over a 10-minute period. The people who circle the park the most number of times will win prizes and get to sample Gypsy’s new craft cider.

Proceeds from the race will benefit HelpUsAdopt.org – an organization that offers grants to individuals and families to help offset the cost of adoption.

More information on Thirsty Orange and the Running of the Beers can be found at www.thirstyorange.com Schedule: 11am Running of the Beers (and Ciders!) – Sponsored by Gypsy Circus Cider Company

1pm First Pour Ticket Entry

2pm Grand Tasting

6pm Festival Ends Parking: In addition to street parking, there is free parking available at the Northeast State Garage.

Arrival: Plan to arrive early so you can avoid the long lines and get ID’ed and checked in early.

Rules: Thirsty Orange is an OVER 21 event. No children, regardless of age, are permitted. Lawnchairs, blankets and small umbrellas are permitted. Coolers are prohibited.

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Thirsty Orange Photos: Sheri Hamilton

DJ Allen Rockhouse is back

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Pumping out the party jams all day!

veteran DJ for fourteen years, Allen Rockhouse got his start playing with Terrence Young under the roof of a partially built house. Working for years to master his skills, Allen Rockhouse now boasts one of the most distinctive scratching styles and a penchant for break-dancing during his sets.

Touring all-over the midwest, Rockhouse has devoted much of his time to perfecting his craft. Rockhouse’s passion for music is evident in all of his sets and his versatile mixes can contain rock, hip-hop, dubstep, breaks, and more. Rockhouse’s enthusiasm behind the decks is absolutely contagious and crowds can’t help but be moved when he is behind the one’s and two’s.

Thirsty Orange Brew-Off

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rewers will compete in an open competition with unique, rare and obscure craft beers that you won’t find anywhere else. Use your ticket to vote for your favorite. Simply write the number of your favorite beer and put it in the voting box at the merchandise tent.

festival

Running of the Beers

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by Gypsy Circus Cider Company

he Running of the Beers (and Ciders!) runs inside the perimeter of Founder’s Park to kick off Thirsty Orange.

This fun run awards awesome runners and festival goers with Bingo Dabs for every lap they complete during a 10 minute period while enjoying East Tennessee’s Gypsy Circus Cider at the end. Only $10 and proceeds benefit Help Us Adopt.

Tennessee Championship of Beers

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he Thirsty Orange Brew Extravaganza will host the 2nd annual 2016 Tennessee Championship of Beers (TCB).

The Tennessee Championship of Beers is born from a need to recognize commercial breweries of the Southeast for the quality pints being served in the region.

150+

Craft Beers to Sample

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theatre

Johnson City Community Theatre Presents

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The Glass Menagerie

ohnson City Community Theatre is proud to present The Glass Menagerie. Join JCCT April 8 through April 23 as they continue their 104th season. Selected as patron’s number one choice to see, and considered one of the most famous plays of modern theatre. Directed by Stacey Bracey, and featuring the talents of Joy Nagy, Josh Cassells, Hannah Faith Rader, and Matthew Kilby.

The Glass Menagerie is a drama of great tenderness, charm and beauty; is about the dynamics between a mother and her children and the creation of a glass house of illusions they have created for themselves. A “pay as you can” evening is set for April 21 so anyone can come and enjoy a night of terrific and thoughtful theatre. Proceeds from that performance will go to Safe Passage: A Domestic Violence Shelter For Women & Children. The production team for Glass Menagerie includes set and light design

by JJ Jeffers, costume design by Josh Cassels, sound design by Carroll Pleasant, and props by Teri Lorch, stage manager Gina Hammond, and the tech crew Janine Pleasant and Luke Cochran.

Tickets on sale now. Visit our website at www.jcct.info, or call our box office at (423) 926-2542 for more information.

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Written by Tennessee Williams Directed by Stacey Bracey

Performances:

April 8, 9, 15, 16, 22, 23 at 7:30pm.

April 17 & 23 at 2:00pm *Doors Open 45 Minutes Before Show Time*

theatre

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Northeast State Theatre stages One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

hat is sane? What constitutes “normal” or “abnormal” behavior? Can an individual follow a rigid set of social standards? And most importantly, who enforces those standards on the individual?

The questions are posed with seriousness and silliness when the Northeast State Community College Department of Theatre stages the classic production One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest in April at the Wellmont Regional Center for the Performing Arts Theater on the Blountville campus.

Dale Wasserman’s adaptation of the Ken Kesey novel comes to life through the eyes of deaf and dumb Chief Bromden, an inmate at an Oregon mental institution. The play emphasizes the struggle of rebels and outsiders against conventional society, and how the guardians of those conventions will take extreme measures to silence nonconformity.

The play follows the exploits of Randall P. McMurphy, a charming scoundrel who parlays his short sentence in the institution rather than prison. He soon learns this was a big mistake. McMurphy spends his time coaxing his fellow inmates out of the shadows to revel in life’s experiences while running afoul of Big Nurse Ratched, the institution’s unyielding administrator.

Opening night is April 7 at 7:30 p.m. Evening performances continue April 8, 9, 14, 15, and 16. There will be two matinee performances scheduled April 10 and April 17 at 2:30 p.m. Tickets are $10 general admission and $8 for groups of 10 or more. Admission is free to Northeast State students presenting valid student identification.

The play is presented through special arrangement with Samuel French, Inc. In compliance with the American Disabilities Act, Northeast State honors requests for reasonable accommodations made by individuals with disabilities. Direct requests can be made at least 10 days in advance to (voice and TTY) 423.279.7640.

Advisory: Due to mild language and adult subject matter, the production is recommended for audiences ages 15 years old and up.

Get tickets now at www.northeaststate.edu/rcpa ticket reservations or for more information please contact the Box Office at 423-354-5169 or email tcbrooks@northeaststate.edu

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EARLY BIRD TICKETS ON SALE NOW

FOR THE 3rd ANNUAL HOPS & HOWLERS CRAFT BREW FEST

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dvance tickets for The Hops & Howlers Craft Brew Fest in Abingdon go on sale now, with a special Early Bird price of $30 available through April 15th. The oneday beer festival takes place June 18, 2016 in downtown Abingdon, featuring over 34 breweries from the region, plus food vendors and live music from The Fritz and Amythyst Kiah & Her Chest of Glass. Hops & Howlers is presented by Food City.

The festival takes place from 4:00pm to 9:00pm Saturday June 18th, at the Abingdon Market Pavilion on Remsburg Drive. Over 30 breweries will be represented at the fest, including local favorites Wolf Hills Brewing, Yee Haw Brewing, and Studio Brew, as well as pioneers in the craft beer industry like Stone, New Belgium, Rogue Brewing, Oskar Blues and Ballast Point. The festival also features a Homebrew Competition, open to home brewers across the Tri-Cities. The People’s Choice winner will receive supplies from The Edisonian Brew Shop.

Tickets include 7oz tasting glass, beer samples and music concerts. Early bird tickets for $30 are available for two weeks only, April 1st through 15th. Regular advance tickets are $35, and same-day tickets will be $40. The Festival is also offering a limited number of $55 VIP tickets, which include early admission, complimentary refreshments, and a tasting of 4 additional beers exclusively served in the VIP tent. Tickets will also be available at local Food City stores beginning April 16th.

The event is restricted to those 21 and up. Special Designated Driver tickets are available for $10, for those who do not intend to drink, but are 21 and up as well. Valid ID is required for entrance.

This festival is co-organized by Abingdon Main Street and the Abingdon Music Experience.

Abingdon Main Street is a non-profit organization dedicated to making the downtown district a place where people want to shop, dine, stay and play, by planning events and activities, and supporting locally-owned businesses. For more information visit www.abingdonmainstreet.com.

Hops & Howlers Craft Brew Fest is sponsored in part by EcoLogical Energy Systems. Media sponsorship provided by Cumulus TriCities WQUT and Smoky Mountain Living.

For tickets and more information on the event, visit http://hopsandhowlers.com/ or contact Sara Saavedra, Special Events Coordinator, at (276) 676-2282 or ssaavedra@abingdon-va.gov.

beer tours

Check out the white board and follow us on twitter to know when the next tours are coming your way. Every 90 minutes, look for the beer flag so you can follow and learn from the head brewers about styles and types of beers.

Presented by Tri-Cities Brew Tours.

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Dollywood Festival of Nations 2016 ne of my favorite festivals each year at Dollywood is the Festival of Nations. If you have never been to the park during this festival I strongly encourage you to go this year. Not only does the festival feature wonderful acts from throughout the world, but plenty of tasty international food items, along with amazing arts and crafts. Dolly Parton was at the park on March 24th to officially open Dollywood for the new season and highlight the Festival of Nations, running now through April 18th.

Dolly made a surprise appearance during the Mother Africa show, which has returned after a successful 2014 run, and welcomed all in attendance to the 2016 season at the park. Before Dolly made her appearance at the show, the crowd was treated to spectacular stunts and music from the talented troupe representing Africa. Mother Africa is a must see show, and is playing in DP’s Celebrity Theater. The popular show Los Pampas Gauchos, from Argentina, makes a return to the festival, and is playing in the Showstreet Palace Theater. The show features traditional music and dance coupled with comedy. As you enter the park during the festival, you will be treated to the soothing sounds of Atahualpa, a musical group from Ecuador, that has been a welcome part of the festival for many years. Performing at the Back Porch Theater is a musical trio from Nova Scotia, Canada, called Celtic Coast, which features original and traditional music.

The other act performing at the Back Porch Theater is Duo Del Sol, with their fantastic Latin sounds, which are sure to please park visitors.

Representing France at the festival this year is David Charrier, who presents his interactive street performance in the Rivertown Junction area of the park. The very unique ensemble called The United Kingdom Ukulele Orchestra, has taken up residence at the Pines Theater, and presents a variety of music all arranged for the ukulele, combined with British comedy. This unique show from the U.K. will no doubt win over many fans. Traditional gypsy music will be presents in the Valley Theater courtesy of Via Romen, led by Vadim Kolpakov, the most prominent seven-string guitar virtuosos in the world. Roaming throughout the park during the festival will be Zebra Stelzentheater of Germany, stilt dancers who will be appearing in original costumes while performing and searching for new friends. In fact, when I saw them they looked like gnomes standing on small bushes.

I sure had a wonderful time catching some of the shows, and certainly hope to visit again before the festival closes. Don’t miss your opportunity to visit Dollywood during the Festival of Nations for an unforgettable international experience. For more details on park hours and the festival shows visit www. dollywood.com or call 1-800-DOLLYWOOD.

www.dollywood.com

Photo credit: Jason and Daniel Worley

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True Crossover

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Dalí Quartet fuses classical repertoire with Caribbean soul

driana Linares grew up in Venezuela, listening and dancing to the salsa, bossa nova, cha-cha, tango and joropos. “This is in your blood,” violist Linares says. “It’s in your ears. This music is in your body.”

After years of classical training, Linares and her colleagues in the Dalí Quartet, with members of Venezuelan, Puerto Rican and Italian descent, have brought the sounds of their homes and streets of their youth into the concert hall. The ensemble fuses Latin American idioms and classical string quartet traditions to form a unique concert experience. Dalí Quartet concerts blend these two styles to bring a “Caribbean soul” to classical and romantic music traditions.

The Dalí Quartet is “a remarkable ensemble,” says Edward Reichel in Salt Lake Magazine. “It’s a true crossover group in the best sense of the word. Made up of Hispanic musicians who are proud of their roots, they bring together the best music by Latin American and European composers. The result is a rare treat for everyone.”

East Tennessee State University’s Mary B. Martin School of the Arts will present the Dalí Quartet on Friday, April 8 at 7:30 p.m. at First Presbyterian Church, 105 S. Boone St. “I think it is important to bring in artists that are bridging different styles of

CROSSOVER ... continued on page 29

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Under the Streetlamp

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featuring former cast members of “Jersey Boys”

to play at NPAC

nder the Streetlamp is coming to NPAC for one-night-only on April 8 at 7:30 pm. Featuring four leading cast members of hit Broadway musicals including “Jersey Boys,” Under the Streetlamp is a concert celebration of classic hits of the American Radio Songbook from the 1950-1970’s featuring tight harmonies and slick dance moves that take audiences back to an era of sharkskin suits, flashy cars and martini shakers.

A flashback to a time when, on hot summer nights, people would gather under a streetlamp to sing their favorite rock and roll songs.

Classic hits first performed by Frankie Valli, Elvis Presley, Tom Jones, The Beatles, Roy Orbison, Bobby Darin and more are reborn for today’s audiences in this evening of great music and hilarious behind-the-scenes tales, complete with an exceptional band composed of world-class musicians. With irresistible charm and rapport, Under the Streetlamp offers audiences the opportunity to get to know four critically acclaimed stars of stage and screen, Michael Ingersoll, Christopher Kale Jones, Brandon Wardell and Shonn Wiley. While each performer gets his moment in the spotlight, their synergy and charisma as a group has drawn an extremely devoted nationwide following.

The production’s original performers met onstage as the lead characters in “Jersey Boys” and have since formed a concert sensation of their very own. After achieving initial success performing in and around Chicago, Under the Streetlamp aired its first PBS special in 2011 and the second in 2014. The four gifted singers then set off on the national tour that continues today, thrilling sold-out audiences throughout the country.

Don’t miss an exciting evening with Under the Streetlamp at the Niswonger Performing Arts Center (NPAC) in historic downtown Greeneville, TN on Friday, April 8 at 7:30 pm. This performance is sponsored by American Greetings. Tickets are $40 for orchestra level seating, $35 for mezzanine seating and $30 for balcony seats. Tickets may be purchased online at www.npacgreeneville.com, in person at the NPAC box office, or by calling 423-638-1679.

NPAC offers online seat selection with no processing or delivery fees. There is a $1.50 ticketing fee per ticket regardless of purchase method. The box office hours are Monday through Friday, 10 am until 5 pm. The 1150 seat performing arts center is located adjacent to the campus of Greeneville High School in Greeneville, TN. For venue information, and to purchase tickets, please visit www.npacgreeneville.com.

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GRAMMY AWARD WINNING BANDS TO HEADLINE

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he annual Summer tradition returns with The Blue Plum Music and Art Festival on Friday, June 3 and Saturday, June 4.

The free portion of the festival will be at the new Pavilion. There, festival goers will enjoy a free Children’s area with activities, a Crossfit Event; the 5K Race, Storytelling; 2 stages; food, art; crafts and music.

Ticket holders will enjoy an expanded music venue in Founder’s Park and Amphitheatre. Two stages with a variety of music options along with arts; crafts; children’s activities; lawn games; aerialists and foodtrucks. Saturday’s Blue Hop beer fest will be on the Great Lawn again this year.

THE MAVERICKS Grammy award winning bands THE STEELDRIVERS and THE MAVERICKS will headline Friday and Saturday night, respectively on the Great Lawn. Tickets on sale at blueplum.org.

Other bands include: Broomstix; Scythian; The Delta Saints; Ed Snodderly; My New Favorites; Folk Soul Revival; Amythyst Kiah and her Chest of Glass; Frito Puente; Greyscale; Mudbugs; Ozone Rangers; J4; Mo Sabri; earth by train; Chalwa; Shake it Like a Caveman; Samantha Gray; Paul Lee Kupfer; Jordan Copas; Sara Jean Kelley; Blue Carpet Corner; Peyton Kendrick & Thomas Cassell.

Weekend passes for the Founder’s Stages - until April 30 are $30/Single Day $20. Beginning May 1, weekend $40/Single Day $25. For the complete schedule and ticket options visit blueplum.org.

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Sister Sadie w/ special guest Dale Ann Bradley

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ale Ann Bradley is 5 time IBMA Female Vocalist of the year & brings her beautiful heartfelt vocals to Heartwood in Abingdon, VA, Sunday, April 10th, along with her special talent of finding songs from other genres and changing them to fit our style of music. ​Playing mandolin for Sister Sadie is none other than the very talented and soulful Tina Adair. Tina is such a powerful singer and musician & brings a youthful confidence to our group. Joining them on fiddle is the always charismatic Deanie Richardson. If you’ve never seen Deanie play live, you’re in for such a treat. She commands the stage like no other. Deanie has performed with Bob Seger, The Chieftains, Vince Gill and Patty Loveless. On banjo, they

have Gena Britt who comes from the great state of North Carolina has played with several critically acclaimed bluegrass bands over the years & is known for her solid & tasteful banjo playing. Gena is also currently a member of Alan Bibey & Grasstowne. And last but certainly not least is Beth Lawrence on acoustic bass.

Beth is well known & respected by her peers as a phenomenal bass player. Beth free-lances as well and brings a comedic element to our stage show! ​ Put us all together and we’re SISTER SADIE. We can’t wait to share our music with you!!

All ages will enjoy the show. Advance tickets on sale now. $58 Fan Favorite includes 2 reserved seats, meet and greet, and 2 signed CD’s! At the door, $20 general and $12 music students. Doors open at 4:30pm. Call Heartwood at 276492-2400 for information or 423-782-0254 for tickets. www.myswva.org/heartwood • www.sistersadieband.com

It’s limbo time!

What would a Hawaiian-themed Thirsty Orange be without a limbo? Join in and, of course, see how low you can go! theloaferonline.com | April 5, 2016 | 15

opinion

Welcome to Ladders

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n many ways, the winding road of the cult TV series “Community” is a microcosm of the modern TV landscape—and how it’s changing. “Community” is a show that was made for the internet, so it seems so appropriate that after trudging along on NBC for five years, the series got a last minute sixth season from Yahoo for their streaming service Yahoo Screen. The series bubbled along on NBC with low ratings—which always seemed to not match the fan support for the series—and changes at almost every turn, including the ousting of the series creator Dan Harmon for a season.

Though there was no official word that the sixth season of “Community” is indeed the last—it’s more or less clear that it is. For one thing, it fulfills most of

the fan hashtag #sixseasonsandamovie. Second, there was a finality to the end of the season that wrapped up things nicely. A swan song for a network orphan that got to go out the way it wanted to, without a network trying to change the series for broad appeal. For the uninitiated, “Community” is a show that is full of meta-humor and pop culture references, about a misfit study group at a Colorado Community College.

As production on this season began, it was for the most part assumed that it would be the last go around for “Community.” In many ways, this allowed the series to go out with a season that is

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a victory lap. The sixth season is a solid, and funny collection of episodes. Tackling things from the departure of cast member Yvette Nicole Brown—by implying her character Shirley has been spun off into her own TV series, to poking fun at the nature of product placement, and the series actual product placement from Honda, in an episode about guerrilla marketers invading the campus of Greendale Community College. Being on the record as a lover of the movie “Clue” one of the delights of the season was the appearance of Lesley Ann Warren and Martin Mull as Britta’s parents.

The recent DVD release of “Community: The Complete Sixth(Final?) Season” brings the show home to own for its fans with a nice collection of extra features. Deleted scenes, the cast trying to answer trivia about the show, a gag reel, and a feature about the series

final episode, that also explores the transition from a low rated network pariah, to a web series where the click numbers showed an audience far larger than any Nelissen waiting ever did. It’s a must have for any fan of the series.

The hashtag has always been #sixseasonsandamovie, which leads to ask “whither movie?”

Though it is unlikely the series will return to television, creator Dan Harmon has expressed interest in making that movie portion of that one day. But if that doesn’t come to pass, I think fans can take great satisfaction in how the quirky series that bridges the gap of Network to Internet comes to a conclusion. See you next week.

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SINGERS OF UNITED LANDS

he Rogersville Arts Council is hosting for the 5th year, Singers of United Lands – a touring group of four professional singers from four different countries that brings the world to Hawkins County! The public concert will be held on Sunday, April 10, 3:00pm at the Rogersville Playhouse, 1924 East Main Street (American Legion). This performance is supported by the Tennessee Arts Commission.

S.O.U.L.’s mission is to develop international and cultural relationships through vocal music from around the world. S.O.U.L. provides workshops, presentations, performances, and lessons for audiences of all ages during a 6-month tour throughout the USA. The singers focus on

8, and the Holston Valley UU Church the morning of April 10.

The 2016 S.O.U.L. Team includes Tenor Julian Gjojdeshi from Albania, Alto Stellah Mugure Mbugua from Kenya, Baritone Kenny David Yuntalla from Malaysia, and Siw Noria Øiongen from Norway.

They all have fascinating backgrounds and cultures from which we will learn. More details about S.O.U.L. are available at www.singersofunitedlands.org.

Admission to the performance is $8 for adults, $5 for students and Senior Citizens.

Children under age of 6 are free. Enjoy this wonderful conAlbania Kenya Malaysia Norway cert and introductions to four vocal music, world history, and linguistics from their four native countries. different cultures, with time to In addition, the group visits Volunteer High School all day on Wednesday, April 6; Walters State visit with the performers.

Community College in Morristown on April 7, Rogersville Middle School for a concert on April For more information about the

JULIAN

STELLAH

KENT

Rogersville Arts Council, like us on Face book and check out the website www.rogartscouncil.org. To make reservations for this performance, please call 423-293-0882 or email rogersvilleartscouncil@gmail.com.

SIWI

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S O LG T P

T I

- TUESDAY - April 5th -

MAG ZEN at Acoustic Coffeehouse GUIDO AUSOME & THE OPEN MIC PLAYERS at O’Mainnin’s Pub DOWNTOWN COUNTRY at Jiggy Ray’s 6:30pm

- WEDNESDAY - April 6th -

OPEN MIC at Jiggy Ray’s MT. THELONIUS at Down Home OPEN MIC at The Willow Tree Coffeehouse &

- FRIDAY - April 8th -

at Acoustic Coffeehouse

- THURSDAY - April 7th -

ACOUSTIC SINGER SONGWRITER NIGHT at Capone’s CIRCUS MUTT

DANIEL WILSON

SHOOTER (Country, Classic Rock, Oldies)

OPEN JAM

at Jiggy Ray’s 7pm

at Holston River Brewing Company 9pm

KEVIN BUTTRY

at Country Club Bar & Grill

NEW MEXICO CHEMICAL at O’Mainnin’s Pub 8pm

STEVE WARNER at Acoustic Coffeehouse

- SATURDAY - April 9th -

ACOUSTIFRIED at Sonny’s Marina & Cafe 7pm WYLDEHEART at Holston River Brewing Company 9pm

DAMAGE DONE at 50/fifty Sports Tavern BILLY STRINGS at Down Home UNDER THE TABLE (Rock, Classic Rock) at Shelbee’s Vintage Cafe 7pm

at Bone Fire Smokehouse

BRANDON MCDANIEL

at Down Home

SCOTT LOW

at The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room 8pm

OLD SCHOOL REVUE

MANDOLIN ORCHESTRA FROM ETSU DAVE EGGAR

at Jiggy Ray’s

at Yee Haw Brewing Company

at David Thompson’s Produce 7pm

RAILWAY EXPRESS / SOUTHERN REBELLION / HUNDRED ACRES

at Willoughby Ruritan

LAWSONGARRETT & THE LOVE

at The Silver Spur 8pm

at Biggie’s Clam Bar

at Holston River Brewing Company 8pm

LAURA THURSTON (Folk)

at O’Mainnin’s Pub

JESSE O’NEILL at Acoustic Coffeehouse - FRIDAY - April 8th -

SETH THOMAS

at Sonny’s Marina & Cafe

JERRY JACOBS BAND at 50Fifty Sports Tavern

OFF SEA & SHORE / SUNDALE and STATE OF SLEEP at Capone’s JOE MULLINS & THE RADIO RAMBLERS at Down Home TRIUMPHANT QUARTET at Paramount Center for the Arts

LIVE MUSIC at Bone Fire Smokehouse RAILWAY EXPRESS at Houston Valley Club AMYTHYST KIAH at The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room

18 | April 5, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

- SUNDAY - April 10th -

CHRIS LONG

Music Room 6pm

MARCUS BOYD BAND at O’Mainnin’s Pub FABLE CRY at The Hideaway 9pm HENRY RIVER HONEY

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If you or your band are playing in the upcoming week and would like to be in The Spotlight, call in advance to (423) 282-1907 or go online to: theloaferonline.com. Due to last minute cancellations or changes, please call the location to confirm.

SUNDOWN BAND (Country) RAILWAY EXPRESS 5 SHOT JACK at O’Mainnin’s Pub DEMON WAFFLE / LOVE UNIT at Capone’s

SHOOTER (Country, Classic Rock, Oldies) at Holiday Inn (exit 7)

ATMA WEAPON at Sleepy Owl Brewery

MOREHEAD STATE MOUNTAIN MUSIC AMBASSADORS at Carter Fold

NIGHTSHIFT (Country, Southern Rock, Oldies) at The Show Palace

ACCIDENTAL SEABIRDS at Bristol Brewery 8pm

EXIT 23

at Bone Fire Smokehouse

DAN HOLT

at Acoustic Coffeehouse

COPPER RIDGE

at Country Club Bar & Grill

at Sonny’s Marina & Cafe 4pm at The Family Barn 1pm

THE LOWEST PAIR at Bone Fire Smokehouse

ACCIDENTAL SEABIRDS at Acoustic Coffeehouse

- MONDAY - April 11th -

THE KINGSTON BROTHERS at Bristol’s Pickin’ Porch

OPEN MIC

at Acoustic Coffeehouse

KARAOKE

TUESDAY Karaoke at 50Fifty Sports Tavern Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City TN Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Boomershine’s Pizza - Bluff City *********************** WEDNESDAY Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke at American Legion 8pm Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Smokey Bones - Johnson City TN Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN *********************** THURSDAY Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City Karaoke at Bristol VFW Karaoke at Holiday Inn - Johnson City *********************** FRIDAY Karaoke at Bristol VFW - Bristol TN Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke at Sportsman’s Bar & Grill 9pm Karaoke w/ Reverb Karaoke at The Cottage 8:30 pm Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN Karaoke at Bristol VFW Karaoke at Elizabethton VFW Elizabethton TN Karaoke w/ DJ Marques at Holiday Inn (Exit 7) - Bristol VA Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City *********************** SATURDAY Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Macado’s - Kingsport Karaoke at Bristol VFW Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City TN ***********************

Spotlight Directory 50 Fifty Sports Tavern 2102 N. Roan Street Johnson City Acoustic Coffeehouse 415 W Walnut St. Johnson City 423/434.9872 Biggies Clam Bar 417 W Stone Dr Kingsport 423/765-9633 Bone Fire Smokehouse at the Hardware 260 W Main St Abingdon Va 276/623-0037 Bristol Brewery 41 Piedmont Ave Bristol VA 276/ 608-1220 Bristol’s Pickin’ Porch 620 State St Bristol 423/573-2262 Capone’s 227 E Main St Johnson City 423/928-2295 Carter Family Fold 3449 A. P. Carter Hwy Hiltons VA 276/594-0676 Country Club Bar & Grill 3080 W State St Bristol 423/844-0400 David Thompson’s Produce 251 Highway 107 Jonesborough 423/913-8123 Down Home 300 W. Main St. Johnson City 423/929-9822 Family Barn 15559 Lee Hwy Bristol VA The Hideaway 235 E. Main St Johnson City 423/ 926-3896 Holiday Inn (Exit 7) 3005 Linden Dr Bristol Va 276/466-4100

Holston River Brewing Company 2621 Volunteer Pkwy Bristol TN Houston Valley Club 1125 Bolton Rd. Greeneville TN 423/ 636-1829 Jiggy Ray’s 610 E. Elk Ave Elizabethton O’Mainnin’s Pub 712 State St Bristol 423/844-0049 The Outdoorsman 4535 Highway 11W Kingsport Paramount Center for the Arts 516 State St. Bristol TN 423/ 274-8920 Shelbee’s Vintage Café 504 State Street Bristol TN 423/ 652-1000 Show Palace 14364 Lee Hwy Bristol VA 276/494-6610 Silver Spur RR 6 Gate City VA 276/ 452-2664 Sleepy Owl Brewery 151 E. Main St. Kingsport 423/390-8476 Sonny’s Marina & Café 109 One St. Gray TN 423/283-4014 Wellington’s Restaurant Carnegie Hotel 1216 W State of Franklin Rd Johnson City 423/979-6400 Willoughby Ruritan 5145 Marvin Rd Bulls Gap VA The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room 216 E Main St Johnson City Yee Haw Brewing Company 126 Buffalo St. Johnson City

HENRY RIVER HONEY @ Acoustic Coffeehouse | Wednesday, April 6th

theloaferonline.com | April 5, 2016 | 19

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Leo the Lion Roars In Night Sky

’m always complaining about how city lights are stealing away the night sky.

But Leo the Lion is one constellation that everybody’s has heard about and is also an easily visible star pattern even from light polluted, suburban backyards.

After 9 pm DST when darkness has settled in, just stand facing the east (where the Sun rises!), and look up.

There will be five equally bright stars forming a backward question mark, punctuated by a brighter, yellow star. And to the left will be three more equally-bright stars in the form of a right triangle.

The question mark, or a farmer’s curved, cutting sickle, is the head, mane and neck of the mighty lion.

The triangle is the hindquarters. And the bright star marking the forefeet is Regulus, given a regal name for more than 5,000 years.

And there is an even brighter “star” below Leo, the mighty Jupiter, making this sign of the Zodiac even easier to identify in the Spring of 2016.

That’s no star, but none other than the planet Jupiter. Even in the cheapest telescope you can see the squashed globe of Jupiter and its four brightest moons.

The giant planet is a favorite of backyard astronomers, as the details of its cloud bands and quickly moving moons make it a different scene every night.

It’s amazing to be looking at Leo the Lion on a computer screen, having spent decades awaiting the animal’s arrival in the east as a sure sign of spring. When you see the stars of the crouching lion in the midnight skies of February, it gives hope that warm weather is on the way.

Leo is one of the most ancient of the constellations.

Being in the Zodiac and so prominent in its easy to identify pattern of stars, the lion has played a key role in the mythology of the ages.

So has the brilliant star Regulus, for some reason thought of by many different civilizations as a noble star. Indeed, it lies in the middle of the ecliptic and has been recorded by sailors since 4,000 BC as an important star for navigation.

Soft, yellow Regulus is one of the four “Regal Stars” of ancient mariners, the other three being Aldebaran in Taurus, Antares in Scorpius and Fomalhaut in the obscure constellation Piscis Austrinus, the Southern Fish. Once a month the Moon is near Regulus, and maybe twice a year occults, or covers up, the bright star.

The great Polish astronomer Nicholas Copernicus gave Regulus its name in the early 1500s, changing it from the Greek word for “royal,” Basilicos. The ancient astronomer Ptolemy had named this important star around 200 AD, and also said everything revolved around the Earth, including the Sun. Copernicus shook up that erroneous concept believed for 13 centuries, as well as renaming Leo’s brightest star.

Regulus is 85 Light Years away, is about twice the size of our Sun, and spins incredibly fast—750,000 mph! This makes the star egg-shaped, and oddly, the star is much

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brighter at its poles than at the equator.

Regulus also anchors the orbital gravity for three other companion stars, much smaller and complex in their own ways. The whole stellar menagerie may be under one billion years of age, while our Sun is in mid-life at 4 billion years.

The 15th brightest star in the Northern Hemisphere sky, Regulus was called “Venant”

by Persian astronomers in 3,000 BC, and was considered the heart of the lion by the Arabic stargazers.

To the Persians, this star pattern was called Ser; to the Turkish, Artan; to the Syrians, Aryo; to the Babylonians, Aru—all meaning Lion. Even the Sphinx of Egypt may be inspired by the celestial lion.

The hindquarter of the Leo is a right triangle of fairly bright stars. Arabians named the second brightest star in Leo, the one in the triangle, Denebola, which means tail. The corner star making the right angle is named Coxa, and the top star of this triangle is Zosma.

Because Regulus lies in the ecliptic, the Moon can pass in front of it, but so can a planet, though rarely.

Venus passed in front of Regulus July 7, 1959, and will do it again on Oct. 1, 2044. Any other planets occulting Regulus will have to wait until the 22nd Century.

Amateur astronomers just love Leo for its treasure trove of galaxies. There are some five galaxies that can be seen with very good binoculars, and they look like faint fuzzies in even small telescopes.

This is the time of year in Earth orbit when we are looking away from our own Milky Way Galaxy and out into a corner of the Universe framed by the stars of Leo, and nearby Virgo. A literal cluster of galaxies are visible in professional telescopes as we are looking into the opposite direction of our own Galaxy and into the expansive void of the incredible Universe.

The brighter galaxies are some of the first targets for newbies in stargazing, as they were cataloged in the 1700s by French astronomer Charles Messier and given designations of “M” objects. Thus, M-65 and M-66 under the triangular rear of Leo, and M-95, M-96 and M-101 under his belly are familiar targets to many backyard telescopes.

Many a curious and enthusiastic stargazer has turned his first telescope to Leo on a warm, spring night and bagged some galaxies while searching around the lion’s den.

In a small telescope, a galaxy looks like a gray splotch of light in the shape of a tapered cigar or maybe a pinwheel. And though a Hubble Telescope photograph of M-66 will blow you away in detail, it is gratifying to see it in a backyard telescope and realize photons of light traveled not millions of miles, but millions of Light Years to strike your human eye.

Fill your eyes with some regal light this spring, and watch Leo jaunt about the summer nights. You might roar with delight!

And don’t forget to take a virtual tour of Leo the Lion and other constellations on the free Stellarium planetarium program—any time, day or night, cloudy or clear. It’s almost like being there.

Celestial events in the skies for the week of April 5th - 11th as compiled for The Loafer by Mark D. Marquette.

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upiter dominates the eastern sky in the evening, and planets Mars and Saturn rule the pre-dawn skies as warm weather finally makes stargazing comfortable. The Winter constellations of Orion, Taurus and Gemini are setting in the west, while Leo leads the parade of Spring constellations in the East. Meanwhile, everybody is enjoying the extra daylight into the evening, though the stars don’t come out until around 9 pm.

Observatory. The 18-ton satellite with four telescopes made discoveries for nine years before being de-orbited in June 2000. This is also the 2010 date of the 131st Space Shuttle flight, this one

by Discovery to the International Space Station with the final “punch out” list of supplies needed to complete the $100 billion complex.

before 9 pm, the familiar winter constellations like Orion are directly south and ready to disappear in the west. On this date in 1993 Shuttle Discovery was launched on the 56th mission of the program; in 2002 Atlantis was rocketed into orbit on the 110th Shuttle flight.

On this 1965 date in space history, the first communications satellite was launched. Intelsat 1 was nicknamed “Early Bird,” and sent the first live images between America and England from its geosynchronous orbit 22,500 miles high. Also launched on this 1984 date was Shuttle Challenger on mission to retrieve and fix the Solar Max satellite during a successful but dangerous tether-free spacewalk. Astronaut “Pinky” Nelson was propelled with the Manned Maneuvering Unit strapped to his back and traveled the length of a football field from the Shuttle and back.

Sun. April 10

Wed. April 6

Thurs. April 7

Leo the Lion rises high in the east, its stars very easy to find: the head and mane are a backward question mark dotted by bright, yellow star Regulus; and hindquarters is a right triangle of three equally bright stars. Jupiter is below in the legs of the Tues. April 5 On this 1991 date in space lion. history, Space Shuttle Atlan- Fri. April 8 Darkness keeps getting later and later, and that’s a joy for tis was launched with one of NASA’s great space observato- gardeners, sports buffs and park lovers. But it’s just longer to ries, the Compton Gamma Ray wait for the stars to come out! When it’s good and dark just

Sat. April 9

The early morning night sky is beautiful with Scorpius featuring two planets. Red Antares is the heart of the fishhook shaped Scorpius with yellow Saturn above left and red Mars above right—making a spectacular triangle. Space Shuttle Endeavour was launched on this 1994 date Looking north and you’ll see the most recognized star pattern of all—the Big Dipper. These seven stars are actually the hindquarters of a much bigger constellation, Ursa Major the Big Bear. Looking this direction is to look away and outside our Galaxy into the depths of our Universe and untold millions of other galaxies. After midnight, the handle of the Big Dipper will “arc” you to the bright, orange star, Arcturus in Bootes. Continue that curve and you’ll run by Spica in Virgo the Virgin.

Mon. April 11

Warm weather brings us outside, and enjoy a little stargazing before turning your attention elsewhere. The first star to pop out will be bright Sirius directly south, and Jupiter high in the east will also pierce the twilight. How early can you see them?

theloaferonline.com | April 5, 2016 | 21

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Contest seeks historical monuments made from Legos

usculum College’s Doak House Museum is hosting a Lego Historian competition, which will commemorate history in East Tennessee. Participants may use Lego blocks, or other plastic bricks, to design and build a historic structure located in East Tennessee.

“This is a first-time event for the Museums of Tusculum College, and we are hoping to get as many people involved through modeling historic buildings and monuments with their Lego blocks as possible,” said Dollie Boyd, director of museums.

The Doak House Museum will be accepting submissions April 11-14, from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

The event will culminate during the Old Oak Festival on the Tusculum College campus, April 15-17. Attendees of the Old Oak Festival will have the opportunity

22 | April 5, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

vote for their favorite on Saturday, April 16, 1-3 p.m.

Prizes will be awarded in five categories: kindergarten-grade 2, grades 3-5, grades 6-8, grades 9-12 and adults. The awards ceremony will take place on Sunday, April 17, at 3 p.m.

To be eligible, the historic structure must be located in East Tennessee and be more than 100 years old, such as any of the historic structures located on the Tusculum College campus, at Exchange Place in Kingsport or in Jonesborough. Entries must be the participant’s own creation, and entries based on a kit or online design are not eligible.

Entries must be secured on a base no bigger than 24 by 24 inches and may not reach over four feet tall. The base may be decorated to compliment the project.

Only one entry will be accepted per participant or team.

Registration is open online at https://www.eventbrite.com/e/lego-historiansproject-drop-off-tickets-22657057870. Deliver completed projects to the Doak House Museum, 690 Erwin Highway, Greeneville, TN 37745.

For complete contest rules, contact Dollie Boyd at the Doak House Museum dboyd@tusculum.edu or 423-636-8554.

The Doak House Museum and the President Andrew Johnson Museum and Library are operated by the Department of Museum Program and Studies of Tusculum College. In addition to the museums, the department is responsible for the College Archives and offers one of the few undergraduate Museum Studies degree programs in the country. The two museums are also part of the National Historic District on the Tusculum College campus. Follow the museums on facebook and Twitter to learn the latest news and upcoming events or visit its Web site at www.tusculum.edu/museums to learn more about the variety of programs offered at the museums.

In Theaters Now

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batman v SUPERMAN

rom the time I was a child to adulthood, I have been a fan of the comic book character Batman. He was always a special, cool and inspiring character to me, and I have always kept up with comics, TV shows, and movies about The Caped Crusader. Through the years I always dreamed of seeing Batman on the big screen with Superman and other DC heroes. While the various DC comic book characters have appeared in many animated TV shows and films, it wasn’t until this year that Batman and Superman finally hit theaters in the same movie. “Batman v Superman” brings the two pop icons together, along with a first time big screen appearance by Wonder Woman. We are talking an event people.

Returning to the role of Superman after his debut in “Man of Steel” is Henry Cavill. The new big screen Batman is Academy Award winner Ben Affleck, who was a controversial choice and raised the ire of some

tempting to get an item from Lex Luthor.. Speaking of Luthor, he is played by Jesse Eisenberg, and he makes the role is own as a younger Luthor at the beginning of his dastardly career. Lex inherited LexCorp from his late father, making him a billionaire rival for Bruce Wayne. Eisenberg is effectively creepy as Lex, and in the film he makes the conflict between Batman and Superman worse. Helping Batman, and encouraging him to avoid tangling with Superman is the always faithful Alfred (Irons). This version of Alfred is closer to the Alfred seen on the “Gotham” TV series, and you feel if he is caught in a pinch, he could fight his way out. The fight between Superman and Batman is thrilling, and eventually leads to the appearance of Wonder Woman and a horrific creature. This film is epic on all fronts, even down to the soundtrack. The cinematography is breathtaking, and I felt it was really cool to discover Metropolis and Gotham City are just separated by a bay.

Oh, and I certainly cannot forget the Bat Cave and the Batmobile, both fantastic in the film. The new Batmobile is like a cross between the one from the 1989 “Batman” film and the Tumbler from “The Dark Knight” series. The Bat Cave has never appeared so cool, and it really makes you want to visit there. Despite what some “critics” have said, this film is wonderful and is a must see for comic book fans, fans of the big three, and action film fans. Finally fans can see Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman on the big screen together!

Plus, there is more to come from the trio in the forthcoming “Justice League” film, where they will be joined

by The Flash, Aquaman and Cyborg. I recommend seeing “Batman v Superman” in the 3D format to get the full effect of this spectacular film. The film is rated PG-13 for good reason due to some scary moments and typical comic book violence, so parents of kids under 13 be aware. One of the best comic book movies ever is now at a theater near you. (Rated PG-13) A-

IN THEATRES NOW Box Office Top 10

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016) Zootopia (2016) Allegiant (2016) Miracles from Heaven (2016) “fan boys”. Joining Cavill and Affleck is Gal Gadot as Diana Prince/ Wonder Woman, who was another controversial choice. Returning from “Man of Steel” are Amy Adams as Lois Lane, Lawrence Fishburn as Perry White, and Diane Lane as Martha Kent. Rounding out the cast are Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor and Jermy Irons as Alfred. Holly Hunter appears in the film as Senator Finch. I really want to discuss the actors in their famous roles more than the plot, so here we go. Cavill has become more comfortable in his role of Superman, and in this film struggles with being the hero he seems himself as, and how the world views him, which is positive and negative. Meanwhile, Affleck is by far the best big screen Batman to date. Yes, I’m sure that will raise the eyebrows of some, but the reason is simple.

Even though I loved Christian Bale as Batman in the “Dark Knight” series of movies, Afflecks version is much closer to the version in the comic books. He is huge in appearance, and the new Batman costume is amazing. I would never want to meet this Batman in a dark alley unless he was about to rescue me. In the film Batman struggles with his disgust toward Superman due to the destruction he caused in “Man of Steel”, and is concerned he may turn against Earth. Gal Gadot absolutely shines in the role of Wonder Woman, and puts all doubters in their place, and her entrance in the film is both elegant and fierce. Wonder Woman is a prefect balance for the warring heroes. In the film she reveals she is at-

10 Cloverfield Lane (2016) Deadpool (2016) London Has Fallen (2016) Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (2016) The Perfect Match (2016) The Brothers Grimsby (2016) IMDb.com (04/02/2016)

The Arts Array presents

Paulette

The Arts Array Film Series presented by Virginia Highlands Community College is in its 45th year. All films are presented at the Abingdon Cinemall on Mondays and Tuesdays at 4 p.m. and again at 7:30 pm.

Paulette (April 11 and 12)

Paulette lives alone in a housing project in the Paris suburbs.

With her meager pension, she can no longer make ends meet. One evening when she attends a curious traffic incident outside her building, Paulette sees the sign of destiny. She decides to start selling cannabis. After all, why should she not? Paulette was formerly a pastry chef. Her gift for trade and cooking skills are assets toward finding original solutions in the conducting of her new business.

The Arts Array Film Series is part of the comprehensive cultural outreach program of Virginia Highlands Community College.

The series is co-sponsored by the Abingdon Cinemall, the Southwest Virginia Higher Education Center, Emory& Henry College,

and King University.

Admission to the films is free for the faculties and students at the supporting institutions. Members of the general community may attend for $7.75.

For a brochure on the series or more information, please contact Tommy Bryant at 276-739-2451 or email him at tbryant@vhcc.edu.

theloaferonline.com | April 5, 2016 | 23

Farewell to an Arm

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o paraphrase George Costanza, I’ve always aspired to become a Civil War buff. The four-year conflict was in many ways the pivotal event in shaping our identity as Americans. At face-value though, it’s a riveting saga, populated with players who, in retrospect, seem larger than life. Certainly one such character whose legend has grown far beyond that of most is the Confederacy’s greatest tactician, Lt. Gen. Thomas J. “Stonewall” Jackson. Even in death, he continues to abide by his prolific nature, residing in two separate gravesites. One of Jackson’s graves holds the majority of his remains, but a second resting place accommodates the general’s detached left arm.

Stonewall Jackson, so nicknamed for his refusal to yield in the face of enemy fire, was as interesting a character as he was a skilled battlefield commander. Often seen wearing dirty, illfitting uniforms and munching on lemons, he was a hypochondriac of epic proportions. Believing that one side of his body was significantly heavier than the other, Jackson had a habit of riding into battle with one arm raised above his head so that he might balance his circulation. Fiercely religious, he generally declined to fight on Sundays and often appointed personnel to important positions on the sole basis of their moral fiber, per his own evaluation.

Such convictions would betray him however at the battle of Chancellorsville in 1863. While returning from the battlefield to his camp in the fading light of May 2, Stonewall was fired on by his own troops, who had mistaken him for a Yankee. He was struck three times: twice in the left arm and once in the right hand. In a vain attempt to save his life, his left arm was ampu-

24 | April 5, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

tated, but Civil War medicine being what it was, the outcome ultimately proved unsuccessful.

General Jackson was taken to the hamlet of Guinea Station, 26 miles away, to convalesce. It was there that he died a week later after contracting pneumonia – a complication of the wound (and likely also the treatment). As the old saying goes: The operation was a success - but the patient died. Incidentally, Jackson left us with some memorable last words, briefly emerging from delirium to exclaim, “Let us cross over the river and rest under the shade of the trees.”

But what about the arm? Well, thinking it undignified for a man of Jackson’s stature to have his limb cast into a pile with other discarded appendages, the corps chaplain, one Beverly Lacy, wrapped the arm in a blanket and had it carried a mile to his brother’s home, where it was eventually interred in the Lacy family cemetery with a full Christian burial. Although the rest of Stonewall Jackson lies buried near his home in Lexington, VA, his left arm remains at Chancellorsville, marked by its own tombstone. The spot is a popular tourist attraction now and includes the Lacy home, known as Ellwood, which has been converted into a museum. It’s an essential destination for admirers of General Jackson. There, they may stand in reverence before the metaphorical stone removed from the wall.

The Deerslayer 5k

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he Johnson City Senior Center Foundation announces the creation of the Tri-Cities first full 5k Obstacle Course Race and Fun Run, set for April 16 at Winged Deer Park.

The Deerslayer will be a 3.1-mile course across mixed terrain that will test endurance, strength, agility, balance and speed. The course includes 18 to 20 obstacles including the bucket carry, monkey bars, tire flip, rope climb, balance beams, multi-height walls, and a great water slide.

Participants may take part in the competitive category for cash prizes or in the Just For Fun category, which is exactly that – just for fun! Teams can help each other with obstacles in this category. All participants will receive a T-shirt and goodie bag.

Medals will be presented to everyone who completes the course, and cash prizes will be awarded to the top three males and females in the competitive group.

“You’ve done 5k’s, 10k’s, half marathons and mud runs well come finish your athletic resume with a race that will challenge you and your friends,” states Race Director, Frank Calderala.

“Whether you are a Competitive athlete or a weekend warrior you will find the Deerslayer 5k Obstacle Course Race both fun and a challenge.”

Obstacle Course and Fun Run

Registration for the Deerslayer is now under way at www.JCDeerslayer.com. Early registrants (by Mar. 15) are guaranteed the great price and one of the participant T-shirts. Online registrations will close at midnight April 13, 2016.

There will be no registrations the day of the event.

As a THANK YOU, the Johnson City Senior Center Foundation Board is recognizing the contributions and sacrifices the first responders, military members and veterans have made for our country and our community with a discounted fee of $45. To find out more information or to register for the Deerslayer, please visit www.JCDeerslayer.com. Registrations will also be accepted in person at Memorial Park Community Center, Mon-Fri., 7 am-9 pm, and Sat. 9 am-5 pm.

Packet pick-up and late registrations will be at Memorial Park Community Center (510 Bert St.) from 4 p.m.-8 p.m. April 14 and 15.

This event is considered a fundraiser for the Johnson City Senior Center Foundation. Your participation will help us continue to support our area seniors. This past year, the Foundation was able to finalize purchase of a wheelchair-accessible bus for the Senior Center, provide financial support for free health information and screenings for seniors, fund fellowships for low-income seniors to participate in activities at the Senior Center at reduced fees, and supplied 136 Christmas boxes to homebound elderly in our community.

The Foundation is still in need of sponsors for this event. Sponsorship packets can be obtained by either contacting Donna Campbell at (423)434-6230 or sending an email to fecvets1@live.com.

For more information about the Obstacles, trophy categories, parking areas, and other race information, please visit www.JCDeerslayer.com and like the Deerslayer 5k Obstacle Course Race and Fun Run on Facebook.

theloaferonline.com | April 5, 2016 | 25

The SmokeHouse BBQ Presents Murder Mystery Caravan In

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“Home Sweet Homicide”

(a Victorian murder mystery staring Hemlock Holmes)

et ready for an evening of fatal fun when Murder Mystery Caravan presents “Home Sweet Homicide,” an audience participation murder mystery

by Tony Schwartz and Marylou Ambrose. The action takes place on Saturday, April 9th and Saturday, April 16th at The SmokeHouse BBQ, 1941 Milligan Hwy., Elizabethton, TN. Seating is at 6:00 PM both evenings.

Move over – or roll over---Arthur Conan Doyle! Murder Mystery Caravan is about to unveil a mystery dinner show that spoofs Victorian customs, Sherlock Holmes mysteries, exotic diseases and cures, and more.

World-famous detective Hemlock Holmes, has just returned from a trip to a sanatorium in upstate New York, where he visited a long-lost cousin. Unbeknownst to his sidekick Whatsun, Holmes has brought the cousin, Elmira, back home. When Whatsun discovers the cousin is a beautiful woman with a rare disease, she’s shocked – and jealous! (Yes, Whatsun is a woman, too.) Mystery and intrigue abound when Dr. Ovary and his

nurse, Frau Franksenbeans, arrive to cure Elmira – and the doctor becomes as infatuated with Elmira as Holmes is! And what does Holmes’ servants, Mr. and Mrs. Drudgery have to do with this? Are they hiding something as well? Keep your eyes and ears open, because someone will be ruthlessly murdered and it’s up to you to determine who-done-it!

Tickets for the dinner and show are $25.00 per person. For reservations, call (423) 547-7427

26 | April 5, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

Talking Targets Pt. 1

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ith the weather getting warmer it’s time to break out the guns and start shooting again. Hopefully you followed the tips in the article on winter storage.

Be sure to clean out any residual oil prior to your first shooting excursion to avoid blowback. The next few articles will be dedicated to different types of targets and their purposes. Today we will be looking at non-conventional or “Plinking” targets as they’ve come to be called. Now contrary to popular belief there’s more to plinking than just having fun, you’re actually training yourself in a great way without the pressure of numbers and grading that comes with paper shooting.

One of the most famous and age-old plinking techniques is the soda-can or pop-bottle method which is when you line up a series of cans or bottles on a fence or platform of some sort and attempt to shoot them at various distances. While this is great fun you’re actually practicing fine target adjustment and is a great opportunity to practice arc of movement which is utilizing the fundamentals of shooting to land sights-on after each shot.

Another great plinking technique is what is known as the dinner plate method, which is typically used with rifles and shotguns at about fifty yards. A typical ceramic dinner plate is ten inches in diameter and makes a great medium range rifle target. Plus you get the satisfaction of seeing the plate bust when you shoot it. Now you might be thinking this method is expensive but it really isn’t used ceramic dinner plated can be bought for as little as fifty cents at a thrift store.

Lastly another great plinking technique is the hefty paper plate method, which utilizes paper plates at various distances and various sizes of plates can also be used. While great for handgun plinking this method can also be used for rifles and shotguns. This is a great way to work on your grouping, it is a proven fact that the bigger the target the higher the grouping disparity. I have witnessed this in my own students numerous times on the range. If they are shooting at the typical B-27 silhouette target it often looks like a 12 gauge shotgun blast instead of handgun shots. However, if I place a ten inch paper plate in the center of the same B-27 target on average eight out of ten will be inside of the paper plate. To quote Benjamin Martin from The Patriot “Aim Small, Miss Small”. Join us next week as we look at paper targets!

As always I hope you enjoyed this article, if you have any questions or concerns please feel free to email me, I look forward to your feedback.

theloaferonline.com | April 5, 2016 | 27

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The John Gardner Interview

ran into an old friend the other day and it was one of those times where it seems two guys haven’t missed a minute even though it had been a while. John Gardener has been on the Sullivan county Commission for a few years now, so our conversation quickly turned to the recent passing of long-time Sullivan County Commissioner Jim King. I shared that Mr. King was a family member of my wife Jess and some of her memories about him. John began to share some really great stories of his own about Mr. King from the commission and from church. It was at that moment it hit me. Guys like John are the next generation to pick up the work carried out by Mr. King and countless others like him. If you don’t know much about guys like John Gardner, you need to.

Here’s your chance to start.

BRIAN: Thanks for taking time to talk with me so our readers can get to know you bud. We grew up around each other in school. Talk a little about your memories of growing up here.

JOHN: Thank you for asking me to do this spot, it is truly a treat. First of all, things are a lot different now than when we were growing up. You and I are part of the generation that still enjoyed ripping and roaring outside with our friends. During the summers, if my Dad and I weren’t at Boone Lake, I would be on my bike from morning until night. I truly was the neighborhood kid and got to see a lot of Kingsport and meet a lot of great folks. In a way I still am because my parents still live in the same house and I am the neighborhood almost daily.

BRIAN: After graduating from Dobyns Bennett we kind of lost touch for a few years as life got busy. Catch folks up on where you went from there and where it has brought you with your work and community involvement.

JOHN: After Dobyns Bennett, I went on to school but really didn’t know what I wanted to do. I went to work for a company in Bristol and stayed there for a long time until they shut down.

Once again, I went on to school in my 30s and that was a very good time in my life. I was able to meet some people that I am still good friends with and have been able to network professionally with. Of course, in 2010 was the year that I won my first election for County Commissioner and again in 2014. In between it was great to be a Delegate to the RNC Convention in 2012.

BRIAN: There is no fame or fortune in the local political scene. Actually, all of the folks I know who are in it always tell me it boils down to a lot of hard work. Why do you do it?

JOHN: You’re right; if someone holds local office for the money and prestige they are in the wrong line of work. Those are wrong reasons and it just doesn’t happen. A lot of work goes into running a city and a county, much more than what is seen.

I am referencing what I call the homework such as fielding calls and meetings. If an official is smart, they will do a lot of research before voting on anything regardless of size of the issue. I ask

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myself 3 things before voting or presenting an item. Is this legal, is it a good way to use the people’s money, and does it injure anyone. My positive vote must meet all 3.

BRIAN: I know you, so I pretty much know the answer to this one. But for folks getting to know you, how important is your faith in what you do every day? Do you feel it is a positive attribute or a detractor for politicians to be men of faith?

JOHN: More now than ever before I rely on the Word of God. As a Christian I really want to share with people that it is not about religion but a relationship with Christ. As an elected official it is clearly a positive attribute because each vote we cast, each law we pass affects so many and to think we are the highest authority is way off.

BRIAN: John it is great to catch up man. I can’t let the opportunity pass us by for you tell folks what is coming up on the commission in the coming months. Go. JOHN: Right now, the budget process has begun. Each department is preparing their fiscal year plan and we the Commission are going to do our best to work it out for the benefit of the county business and the people we serve. If folks would like to know more and stay up to date, they can go online to www.sullivancountytn.gov.

CROSSOVER ... continued from page 12 music, incorporating different sounds into their repertoire,” says Anita DeAngelis, director of the Martin School of the Arts. “We are very excited about the unique combination of experiences Dalí has in store.”

The evening’s program will take audiences from Venezuela, for Efrain Amaya’s “Angelica,” to Austria for a Mozart string quartet, than back to Brazil, Spain, Venezuela, Argentina and Cuba for works by Villa-Lobos, Turina, Plaza, Gardel and D’Rivera, respectively.

The combination of Argentine tangos and Panamanian boleros with standard quartet music from the classical and romantic periods is what Linares believes audiences enjoy most about their performances.

Linares, who holds a master’s degree from Temple University and studied with violist and Curtis Institute of Music President Roberto Diaz, is also principal violist with the Black Pearl Chamber Orchestra.

Cellist Jesús Morales, a graduate of The Cleveland Institute of Music, is cello professor of the Elite Strings Program at Temple University and principal cellist with the Black Pearl Chamber Orchestra.

Carlos Rubio, like Linares, began his musical career as a member of Venezuela’s Youth Orchestra System, El Sistema. A founding member of Dalí Quartet, he teaches nationally and internationally and is principal second violinist of the Black Pearl Chamber Orchestra.

The newest member of the quartet is first violinist Domenic Salerni, who holds degrees from The Cleveland Institute of Music and Yale’s School of Music and most recently served as concertmaster and soloist with the Atlanta Community Symphony Orchestra and Emory University’s Vega String Quartet.

The Philadelphia-based Dalí Quartet currently serves as Quartet in Residence for the Arts and Community Network where they host the Dalí Quartet Chamber Music Camp and Festival, and a large part of their mission is engaging with the community, especially young people.

As part of its outreach, the Dalí Quartet will host a Saturday workshop involving the local Academy of Strings program, directed by Tim and Kim Barrett, as well as other area string students and Spanish and music classes at ETSU. Ticket for the performance are $5 for students with ID, $15 for seniors 60 and older and $20 for general admission. To purchase tickets online, visit www.etsu.edu/martin or call 423-439-TKTS (8587).

To learn more about the quartet, visitwww.daliquartet.com. For information about the Saturday workshop, contact Heidi Ehle at 423-439-8333 or ehleah@etsu.edu.

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Answers found on page 32

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pets of the week

Boss is a 4 year old male Pit. He is neutered and up to date on all vaccines. He is a sweet and playful boy but is not small dog friendly

Gizmo and Shiloh are 3 year old female Chiweenie sisters. They are spayed and up to date on all vaccines. These sweeties are deeply bonded and must be adopted together! They are very loving.

The Bridge Home has an ongoing aluminum can can collection in front of the shelter at 2061 Hwy 75 in Blountville,TN 37617. The cans are collected by a volunteer and the money from the aluminum goes towards badly needed food and supplies for the animals The Bridge Home No Kill Animal Rescue has started a pet food pantry for people that have had financial hardships because of job loss or medical problems and are struggling to feed their pet. They can come by the shelter and get cat or dog food to get through the tough time.

Donations can be sent to The Bridge Home Shelter PO Box 654 Blountville, TN 37617 Every animal in their care is spayed or neutered and fully vaccinated before being adopted. Being a non profit the shelter is funded entirely by membership dues and private donations. They always need volunteers or monetary donations. Other always needed items:pet food, cat litter & cat toys dog treats & dog toys,paper towels, cleaners, office supplies,Purina weight circles. Phone: 423.239.5237 Hours are Mon-Fri 12pm-6pm Sat 12pm-3pm and Sun 2pm-4pm. Website is www.bridgehomerescue@gmail.com or like them on Facebook: www.Facebook. com/bridgehome

SELL .... YOUR .... STUFF

www.theloaferonline.com theloaferonline.com | April 5, 2016 | 31

There is no admission charge to at- dinner in the church parish hall, Bertend the Expo and door prizes will be ndt Hall, and provide table service. offered. For additional information on Dinner includes salad, spaghetti with the Jonesborough Senior Center An- meat or vegetarian sauce, garlic bread, leadership skills among other selection nual Spring Expo & Health Fair, contact dessert, and coffee/tea.

Tickets are $10 per person with $25 criteria. The Student Needs Project pro- Mary Sanger at 423-753-1084 or marys@ maximum per family, sold in advance vides help for students facing non-ac- jonesboroughtn.org. and at the door. Proceeds will help ademic and socioeconomic factors that support the group’s 2016 summer misimpact their lives and ability to attend Art in the Heart Gallery sion trip for service projects in Chicollege. The Project directs campus inicago. To reserve tickets and tables, call tiatives focusing on food security, re- Upcoming Classes: the church office at (423) 245-5187 ext. source development, emergency funds, Chain Maile Necklace Class 6, or contact the Rev. Chris Harpster at and transportation. harpsc@charter.net. St. Paul’s EpiscoFor more information about the sale, with Karen Hitchcock contact the College’s Office of Scholar- Wednesday April 6, 2016 - 6pm to 8 pm pal Church is located at 161 E. Ravine Road, Kingsport, Tenn. ship Programs and Student Needs at Cost per Student $20 423.279.7637 or scholarships@North- Material fee paid to Karen Hitchcock eastState.edu. day of class $15 Monthly Book Sale at Gray Total cost per student $35 Min students - 4 max students – 10 Branch Library Spring Expo & Health Fair Applications may be found on the city’s The first monthly Friends of the LiThe Jonesborough Senior Center website at www.bristoltn.org. will host its 7th Annual Spring Expo Fused Glass Square plate Class brary Book Sale at Gray Branch Library will be April 15 and 16. Hours will be & Health Fair on April 7 from 9 a.m. to

by Karen Hitchcock from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. on Friday, and noon at the Jonesborough Senior CenThursday April 21, 2016 -6pm to 8pm from 9 a.m. to noon on Saturday. ter.

Cost per student $50 Fiction and nonfiction books for Come take part in this free event that Materials fee paid to Karen Hitchcock adults and children will be available will include health and wellness incenday of class $15.00 for purchase. tives, along with area businesses and Total cost per student $65 The sales will be held on the third organizations showcasing their servicMin students - 4 max students – 8 Friday and the following Saturday of es. Blood Pressure screenings, hearing each month. screenings, body mass index checks, This event is sponsored by the balance tests, and stress and posture Saint Paul’s Youth hosting Friends of the Washington County Lianalysis by Dr. Randy Moze of Back to spaghetti dinner fundraiser brary (FOL), and all proceeds go to the Health are all featured services being event organization. The Friends fund the offered free of charge to visitors.

Participating businesses and organiSaint Paul’s Episcopal Church Youth children’s and teen programming at zations include Four Oaks Healthcare, Group will host a fundraiser dinner/ both libraries, and have provided new Dillow-Taylor Funeral Home, Grand dance on Saturday, April 9 from 6:00- shelving for the Gray Branch in the last Home Furnishings, The Medicine 10:30 pm. Music provided by DJ Craig, few years.

For more information call the library Shoppe, Food City of Jonesborough, and a silent auction will take place. The Jonesborough Fire Department and church youth will prepare a spaghetti at 477-1550.

Police Department, McKinney Center, Jonesborough Visitors Center, Back to DROP QUOTE: “The universe may have a purpose, but nothing we know sugHealth, BCBS of TN, Governor’s Bend, gests that, if so, this purpose has any similarity to ours.”

Tetrick Funeral Home, United Health- CRYPTOGRAM: Inspiration may be a form of superconsciousness, or perhaps care, Max Medical Specialties, The of subconsciousness - I wouldn’t know. But I am sure it is the antithesis of selfHealth Resource Center, Jonesborough consciousness.

First Assist, Avalon Hospice, VA Medical Center Audiologist, The Lexington Senior Living, Life Care Center of Gray, Home Instead, In Home Services, Mackie Finance, Visiting Angels, Caris Healthcare, Smoky Mountain Home Health & Hospice, A1 Independent Living Solutions, Contact 211, Bright Star Care, Keep Jonesborough Beautiful, , Eastman Credit Union,1st TN AAAD, Crest Point Healthcare, Broadmore, Dominion Senior Living, The Mackie Group and more.

things to do Book Signing by Kingsport native, author Lisa Alther Kingsport native, author Lisa Alther will sign her latest publication, ABOUT WOMEN Conversations between a Writer and a Painter, on Thursday, April 7 at ARTIQUES, 338 Commerce St. In downtown Kingsport. There will be a meet, greet and signing from 5-8pm. An informal reading will be held at 7pm.

The book will be available for purchase.

ABOUT WOMEN was co-authored with Francoise Gilot whose art appears in museums around the world. Alther is widely known for her first novel Kinflicks (1975) and has authored 9 additional books. The two women are from diverse backgrounds and have been friends for many years.

ARTIQUES (www.southernartiques. com) is proud to sponsor this literary event. Light refreshments will be served.

Northeast State hosts the Scholars Attic Sale April 7-8

Get the goods and do some good for college students at the upcoming Scholars Attic Sale sponsored by the Northeast State Community College Scholars Foundation. All proceeds from the sale benefit Northeast State Foundation Scholarship awarded to students and the Student Needs Project.

The Scholars Attic Sale is scheduled Thursday, April 7, from 9 a.m. until 6 p.m. and Friday, April 8, from 9 a.m. until 2:30 p.m. The sale is being held in the Faculty/Staff Dining Room, A110 of the Student Services Building on the College’s Blountville campus, next to Tri-Cities Regional Airport. The sale is open to the public.

Shoppers browse a variety of items including adult and children’s clothing, household goods, small appliances, furniture, books, DVDs, and toys. All purchases must be made by either cash or check. Items must be picked up and removed from campus at the time of sale.

Northeast State Foundation Scholarships are competitive scholarship awards based primarily on academic merit with consideration given to a student’s major, county of residence, and

32 | April 5, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

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***Condo for sale ***

Price: $ 99,900.00 Woodstone Condos. 2 bedroom / 1.5 bath. Remax Checkmate. Contact: Wayne Bartley 423-292-2595, Deborah Bartley 423-686-6180

Homes like this don’t come available often!

Phone: 423-612-1367 Price: $ 132,000.00 306 Mockingbird Place, Blountville, TN. 3 bedrooms, 1 bath 1,080 sqft. Completely remodeled with features including hardwood floors throughout the home, updated bathroom, recessed lighting, crown molding, new roof in 2010, multi zone surround sound system wired to every room and outside the home, ADT pulse security system with motion sensors and video cameras. Contact David Fletcher - Caldwell Banker 423612-1367

You’re important. Let us show you how! Hiring Drivers: OTR, Regional, Teams, Owner Opps.

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Full, Part time, and PRN LPN’s needed.

Low stress environment; $15.00 per hour & up based on experience; affordable medical/dental insurance with 30 full-time weekly schedule; nurse/patient ratio of 1:2 or less. Pre-employment drug screening and background check required. Apply at Dawn of Hope, 500 East Oakland Avenue, Johnson City or send Resume to P.O. Box 30, Johnson City, TN 37605-0030 Website: www.dawnofhope.com The Dawn of Hope is an affirmative action/equal opportunity employer.

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Account Representative

Phone: 423-283-4324. The Loafer is seeking motivated account representatives to service various territories throughout Tri-Cities.

Must be enthusiastic, hardworking, positive, successful. Part time - Full time. Flexible hours. Must have reliable transportation, smart phone & self-motivated. Join The Loafer team today! Email resumes to info@theloafeornline.com

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Job Coach - Greeneville Area

Duties include providing assistance for individuals with developmental disabilities in all aspects of activities. Emphasis placed on assisting individuals in accomplishing responsibilities at work in the community. Must have transportation & work flexible hours.

Starting $9.00 & up depending on experience. Pre-employment drug screening & back ground check required. Must have high school diploma/GED & valid driver’s license. Apply at: Dawn of Hope, 500 E. Oakland Ave, Johnson City

107 Services 129 Legal

SOCIAL SECURITY DISABILITY BENEFITS. Unable to work? Denied benefits? We Can Help! WIN or Pay Nothing! Contact Bill Gordon & Associates at 1-800-864-9032 to start your application today!

85 Jobs 91 Caregivers/Nanny

DIRECT SUPPORT PROFESSIONALS

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110 Beauty / Salon A Style 4 U.

We are a full service salon owned and operated by by Sandi Smith, with hair stylist Renee Gibson on board, that offers professional cuts, styles, colors, and perms at affordable prices. The best prices in the Tri-Cities area. Men’s haircuts are $10. Women’s are $12. We have over 32 years experience in the business and we want to help you get your style on! We are located at 943 Volunteer Parkway in Bristol, Tennessee, near Auto Zone. Call us at 423-534-9825.

Walk ins welcome!

128 Lawn & Garden

Mowing starting at $25!

Contact Majestic Lawn Care Small yards start at $25. We also offer general landscaping such as mulching, small tree/bush removal, sprucing up flowerbeds, general yard cleanup. For a free estimate contact us at 423-268-7319 or majesticlawnserivces@yahoo.com

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ing. Creative Interiors Painting, Bedrooms, Living Rooms, Kitchens, Offices, WHOLE 121 General Services NOTHING MAKES A PROP- HOUSES, anything you want, ERTY LOOK BETTER THAN A Competitive Pricing, Flexible NICE SLATE-BLACK PARKING Schedules, Call David or Lisa, LOT OR DRIVEWAY!!

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133 Painting

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A

YOU HAVE (TOO MUCH) MAIL

n interesting the-centre.co.uk article, written by Sam Clegg for the online magazine’s September 12, 2013 edition, asks the very appropriate question: “Email: The Curse Of The Twenty First Century?” Who would not answer this question in the affirmative?

Like most members of my (rather ancient) generation, I can remember when email was a novelty, and a little-used one at that.

Of course, that was not very long ago but definitely classified by most people as “back in the day”. Now, as all of us are painfully aware, email is an ever-present and often annoying fact of life-like members of the Kardashian family and GPS devices.

A testament to the central place email occupies in our lives is the emergence of a whole class of people who specialize in telling us how to manage our emails. I have always suspected that these email experts have personal assistants who do nothing but check their bosses’ email and devise all sorts of efficient ways to manage the ever-growing volume of this communication glut.

If this were not the case, do you think these experts would have time to tell us how to manage our emails?

Just today (or last week as you read this), Stephanie Vozza, writing in Fast Company, outlines “9 Surprisingly Simple Ways To Get People To Respond To Your Email.” Yes, it’s true—the more email we receive the less likely we are to read, let alone respond to the messages we discover in our inboxes. Email, of course, is more of a fact of life at our workplaces, because I suspect most people ignore their personal emails, preferring instead to text or tweet. So, let’s focus on what we do at work.

According to Vozza, the average worker (whoever he or she might be), receives in excess of 120 messages in their inboxes every day. How do we deal with all this, and how can we be sure that people respond to the messages we send? Let’s take a brief look at Vozza’s nine simple recommendations: First, we should simply “ask for a response.” Do this in the subject line. The direct approach is best. Just type RESPONSE NEEDED in your subject line and it should receive more attention than if you put the usual and predictable stuff there.

Second, we should change the subject line every time we respond to a message. Apparently, when recipients continue to see the same subject line in a string of responses, they tend to ignore it, thinking it is just more of the same stuff they already read in all those previous messages.

Third, you should always address the recipient by name.

This makes the mes-

sage more personal, especially when you realize that everyone like to see their name in print.

Fourth, you should begin your email message “by describing the response you want and your deadline. Don’t make your recipients search for these important details.”

Fifth, messages should be “written at a third-grade reading level with simpler words and fewer words per sentence.” Sad but true—it is incredibly easy to overestimate the reading competence of many of our readers. So, we should use the KISS (keep it simple, stupid) method when composing our emails.

Sixth, and closely related to the previous advice, is to try to “keep your email between 50 and 125 words.” Studies apparently show that chances of response (or even of reading) decline more and more with each additional word added to the message The seventh piece of advice is to use “a moderate amount of positive or negative emotion words” such as “great, wonderful, delighted, pleased, bad, hate, furious, and terrible.” In fact using such words increases our chances of getting a response by ten to fifteen percent. In other words, try to avoid ranting and cursing.

Eighth, “use bold and color to highlight the response you’d like to get,” and try using bullet points to make your message stand out and seem thoughtful and well-organized. Sometimes the mere appearance of an email text will entice us to read it (that is, if we open it in the first place).

The last piece of advice offered by Vozza is to make every effort to send your messages in the morning. Why? Because “a study of 500,000 emails by email tracking software provider Yesware [revealed that] emails sent between 6 a.m. and 7 a.m. get the highest rates, about 45%.” That’s because fewer emails are send at those times, thereby lowering the amount of competition you are up against for attention.

So much for getting people to notice our email messages. What about dealing with the overload of messages we receive every day? According to Dr. Steve McCabe, writing in a recent edition of The Huffington Post, the “need to read (and send) work email is like having a drug habit; you dread opening up our inbox but you cannot resist.” How true.

In order to deal with all this, Jan Burnell, writing in the aforementioned the-centre.co.uk piece, advises that we set up folders labeled Decide, Dump, Delegate, De-

fer, Diarise (i.e. place in Tasks or Calendar tools), and Deal (i.e. take some action). Supposedly, this type of classification method (and there are many more out there, suggested by other “experts”) will make your email more manageable.

Of course, I have found that dragging messages to folders is little different than deleting them outright. After all, how often do we check our folders?

Out of sight, out of mind.

While doing my rather cursory research for this column, I found a profound little piece of advice from Ferrari, the world famous auto manufacturer, about how to lessen the burden of email at the corporate level.

Here is the memo: “From now on, each Ferrari employee will only be able to send the same email to three people in-house.

The injudicious sending of emails with dozens of recipients often on subjects with no relevance to most of the latter is one of the main causes of time wastage and inefficiency in the average working day in business. Ferrari has therefore decided to nip the problem in the bud by issuing a very clear and simple instruction to its employees: talk to each other more and write less.”

So, there we have it—our email problems can be greatly lessened if we “talk to each other more and write less.”

And that’s the best advice I’ve read all week.

Here’s hoping you will find ways to reduce your “injudicious sending of emails” during the coming days. Your inbox will thank you.

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