theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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on the cover
Volume 31 • Issue #3 Publisher Luci Tate
Merry Christmas
Editor Graphic Arts Director Don Sprinkle Cover Design Bill May
Distribution Jerry Hanger Teresa Hanger Published by Pulse Publishing, LLC., P.O. Box 3238, Johnson City, TN 37602 Phone: 423/283-4324 FAX - 423/283-4369 www.theloaferonline.com info@theloaferonline.com e-mail: editorial@theloaferonline.com adcopy@theloaferonline.com All advertisements are accepted and published by the publisher upon the representation that the agency and/ or advertiser is authorized to publish the entire contents and subject matter thereof. The agency and/or advertiser will indemnify and save the publisher harmless from any loss of expense resulting from claims or suits based upon contents of any advertisement, including claims or suits for defamation, libel, right of privacy, plagiarism, and copyright infringement.
Founder: Bill Williams Let’s Get Social!
14 Batteries Not Included So This Is Christmas 20 Pop Life Office Christmas Party 18 Stargazer John Glenn Memories from Marq 19 Skies This Week 20 Appalachian Wanderers Feast In Dixie 20 The Trivial Traveler Old Age Has Me Stumped 22 Outdoor Life President Elect & Gun Laws 23 The Casual Word Rudolph's Tundra 28 Puzzle Page 31 Kelly’s Place Have Yourself A Merry Little (Telephobia and Scattered Brain Syndrome-Free) Christmas
your week’s line-up
Contributing Staff Jim Kelly Andy Ross Ken Silvers Mark Marquette Brian McManus Brian Bishop Daniel Worley Jason Worley Langley Shazor Matt Messer
columns & reviews
Advertising Dave Carter Patti Barr Shawn Hale Paul Kavanaugh
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Alert Cab Outdoor Expo Summer Camp Registration Now Open William King Museum of Art First Thursday Calendar Contest Winners Announced Barter Announces Two New Shows Business Of The Month Wines and Vintner of Tuscano New Year's Day, First Sunrise 35th Annual Christmas Dinner Go Red This Season Spotlight Pets Of The Week Things To Do
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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ALERT CAB Reduced-Rate Cab Rides
A
s adults head out to celebrate Christmas and New Year’s, they can “do the ride thing” by taking advantage of a free program that can help keep Johnson City’s streets safe. Holston Distributing Company along with W.W. Taxi Company of Johnson are sponsoring Alert Cab, a communitybased initiative that helps prevent drunk driving by providing safe cab rides home to adults who may have had too much to drink, which will be running from 6:00pm December 23rd 2016 through 12 (Noon) January 1st 2016
Area bartenders and servers at participating bars and restaurants have a confidential phone number they may use to request a discounted cab ride for adults who want to get home safely at the end of the evening. By offering these discounted rides home, Alert Cab keeps potential drunk drivers off the road. “We want all adults who choose to drink, regardless of the occasion, to act responsibly,” said Chris Ivanich, Corporate Social Responsibility Representative, “That means if you include alcohol in your celebrations, please plan ahead and arrange to use alternate transportation, such as Alert Cab, or a designated driver to get home safely.” According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, drunk-driving fatalities have declined 44 percent since 1982. Here in Tennessee, drunk-driving fatalities have declined 55 percent since 1982. Visit www.anheuser-busch.com to learn more about Anheuser Busch’s Social Responsibility programs.
The World Champion Jack Pine Lumberjacks will be educating and entertaining through- out the weekend and fashion shows will feature the latest in high tech gear and outdoor wear. Seminars from expert instructors will be scheduled throughout the two day event and a climbing wall will even be erected to test your skill or inspire a brand new passion! The Great Smoky Mountains Outdoor Expo is coming to the Knoxville Civic Coliseum, located at 500 Howard Baker Jr. Avenue, Knoxville, TN 37915 this January 21st & 22nd, 2017. Show hours are Saturday, 10am-6pm & Sunday, 10am-4pm. Tickets are $10 at the door, kids 12 and under are FREE. Ken Moody Productions’ mission is to get families outdoors. Ken stated, “Families need to be spending more quality time outside together, for both their health and emotional well-being. It’s a very bonding thing to participate as a team in a camping trip or on any outdoor adventure together. It makes the family unit stronger, and who wouldn’t want that?” Ken has been a nature lover and sportsman his entire life, calling Tennessee his home for the last 25 years, after retiring from the Army. He’s traveled the world and thinks that East Tennessee is hands down the most beautiful place to explore and adven- ture. To stay up to date on the Great Smoky Mountains Outdoor Expo’s latest news, visit Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/GSMOutdoorExpo/ For more information or questions, call 865-414-6801.
SUMMER CAMP REGISTRATION
NOW OPEN
It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas around Doe River Gorge and plans are already being made for next summer. Registration for another exciting year of 2017 Summer programs is underway. Adventure Quest is our Week-Long Summer Camp program for students entering grades 3-6 on weeks (June 11-16; 25-30; July 16-24) and students entering grades 7-12 on weeks (June 4-9; 18-23; July 9-14;23-28). Ascend to new heights as you embark on great adventures with counselor and friends. Make memories that will last a lifetime as you get catapulted from the blob, master rappel, and relax by the lake with friends.... and that's only the first day! Doe River Gorge's Multi-Week Leadership Programs 17THREE, SALT, and LEAD are sequential programs designed to promote a heart of servant leadership. During your time you will build professional skills for the future, experience amazing character development, and grow your faith all while enjoying the adventure that is Doe River Gorge. Give camp for Christmas now through December 20th and receive $120 off registration and we will ship a gift pack including a personalized certificate for the program you choose, a Camelbak© water bottle, and more! For more information about Doe River Gorge, which is located in Hampton, Tenn., (just outside of Elizabethton) please visit www.doerivergorge.com or call 423-725-4010.
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theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
OUTDOOR EXP0
Great Smoky Mountains
The Great Smoky Mountains Outdoor Expo is an all outdoors exposition showcasing vendors and exhibitors for outdoor enthusiasts of all kinds. Everything from hunting and fishing, hiking and kayaking, artisan knives, African safaris, 4 wheeling, adventure parks, and more will all be at the Expo.
William King Museum of Art
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“
This is one of the best local free papers you can get, I never miss an issue, and I love the spotlight section very helpful for local bands. Great job, keep up the great work." Amy K.
FIRST THURSDAY
W
illiam King Museum of Art is excited to announce that it will celebrate the opening of three new exhibits on First Thursday, January 5, 2017 from 6-8 p.m.
Virginia 360°: Photographs by Thomas R. Schiff is an exhibit of contemporary photographs on loan from the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts. Using a panoramic camera, Mr. Schiff captures iconic images of Virginia landscapes and buildings including George Washington’s Mount Vernon, the Sir Christopher Wren Building, several Frank Lloyd Wright houses, and Arlington National Cemetery. e perspective achieved through the panoramic process engages the viewer and questions their perception of the familiar image. e exhibit is open from December 19, 2016 through March 12, 2017. The Compassion Project: Walk a Mile in My Shoes is also opening that same evening. In the Museum’s first crowdsourcing effort, this special month-long exhibit features pairs of used shoes donated by the community accompanied by a story about the history of those shoes. e exhibit, which runs through January 29, 2017, seeks to promote empathy, compassion, and tolerance for people from all walks of life. Visitors to the Museum on First Thursday will also be treated to an informal gallery talk by current Panoramic Gallery Artist Alan O’Neal. His exhibit, Objects Lost and Found is displayed alongside Gregory Davis’ Impermanence of Knowledge through the month of January. In this shared exhibit, O’Neal comments on consumer culture while Davis looks at how we store information and pass on knowledge. These events are free and open to the public. For more information visit www.williamkingmuseum.org or call 276-628- 5005. William King Museum of Art is located at 415 Academy Drive, o West Main Street or Russell Road, in Abingdon. The Museum features five exhibition galleries, artist studios, and an outdoor sculpture garden. Educational programs in the visual arts are offered year-round for both children and adults, and school audiences are served by in-house and outreach programs. Accredited by the American Alliance of Museums, the William King Museum of Art is a partner of the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts, a member of the Virginia Association of Museums, and is funded in part by the Virginia Commission for the Arts and the National Endowment for the Arts.
The Bristol Train Station is one of the city's most photographed landmarks and now some of the best photos are available in a calendar. The Train Station invited photographers of all skill levels to submit photographs of the Train Station to the calendar contest. A committee of judges selected their twelve favorites for the calendar along with one image for the cover. The chosen photos and photographers' information will also be on display in the Train Station in 2017. "The idea came to us when we noticed how many amazing photos were shared on the Train Station's social media pages every week," says Brittany Sullivan, Manager of the Bristol Train Station.
“
We wanted to share the work of these talented photographers while showcasing the beauty of a building we are all very proud of."
The Bristol Train Station is pleased to announce the winning photographers (in no particular order): David Oakley of Springdale, AR; Gordon Hutchinson of Gray, TN; Phyllis Moore of Bristol, VA; Todd Currin of Bristol, TN; Tim Stigers of Muncie, IN; Andrew King of Woodbridge, VA; Jonathan McCoy of Bristol, VA; Chris Morris of Johnson City, TN; Paul Moore of Roanoke, VA; and Jennifer Taylor of Kingsport, TN. The calendars will be available for purchase at the Bristol Train Station office and at YWCA Bristol at 106 State Street. The calendars are $10 each and proceeds from the calendar sales benefit the historic Bristol Train Station. For more information about the Bristol Train Station Calendar, please contact Brittany Sullivan at b_sullivan@ ywcabristol.org. The Bristol Train Station is operated through a partnership with YWCA Bristol.
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theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
Photography Calendar Winners
Bristol Train Station Announce
Photographers of every skill level submitted photographs to the panel of judges for inclusion in the calendar contest.
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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BARTER THEATRE ANNOUNCES
NEW SHOWS
Barter Theatre announces two additional productions for the 2017 season, “The Music Man” and Irving Berlin’s “White Christmas.” Fall 2017, “The Music Man” will play at Gilliam Stage at Barter Theatre alongside “Sherlock Holmes and the American Problem.” In late November, Barter Theatre will produce Irving Berlin’s “White Christmas” at Gilliam Stage. Bring the entire family for “The Music Man.” Never seen before on Barter Theatre’s stage, there is nothing more American than Meredith Willson’s classic Broadway musical about the fast-talking “Professor” Harold Hill. Harold convinces the parents of River City, Iowa, to buy instruments and band uniforms for their youngsters to save them from the corrupting influence of the local pool hall. Before Harold can skip town with the money, he falls for the local librarian, Marian Paroo. Chaos ensues as Hill’s credentials are questioned; the town is divided. This story features some of musical theatre’s best characters including: Mrs. Paroo, Winthrop, Hill’s sidekick Marcellus, Eulalie Mackecknie Shinn, and a whole host of others. See Barter’s Resident Acting Company, the actors you know and love, perform Willson’s timeless score including, “Goodnight, My Someone,” “Seventy-Six Trombones,” “Shipoopi,” “You Got Trouble,” and “Till There Was You.” Irving Berlin’s “White Christmas,” is a timeless tale of joy and goodwill filled with Irving Berlin’s call songs, topped off with glorious dancing and lots of snow. Irving Berlin’s “White Christmas“ tells the story of two showbiz buddies putting on a show in a picturesque Vermont inn, finding their perfect mates in the bargain, and honoring their beloved army general in the process. Full of romance, laughter and some of the greatest songs ever written, including: “Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep,” “Happy Holiday,” “Sisters,” “Blue Skies,” “Snow,” “The Best Things Happen While You’re Dancing,” and the unforgettable title song, Irving Berlin’s “White Christmas” promises to be a merry and bright experience for the entire family! For more information visit bartertheatre.com or call the box office at 276628-3991. Barter Theatre’s 2017 season begins in February and feature the following shows: Gilliam Stage at Barter Theatre • Mamma Mia!—Spring • A Midsummer Night’s Dream—Spring • Footloose: The Musical— Summer • The Cottag —Summer • Ain’t Misbehavin’—Summer • The Music Man—Fall • Sherlock Holmes and the American Problem—Fall • White Christmas—Christmas
Barter Stage II • Six Dance Lessons in Six Weeks—Spring • Uncanny Valley—Spring • The Savannah Sipping Society—Summer • Leaving Iowa—Summer • Ghost, Ghost, Come Out Tonight—Fall • Friendly’s Fire—Fall • Tuna Christmas—Christmas • The Santaland Diaries— Christmas
Business Of The Month
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
ABINGDON MAIN STREET
“We are honored to serve the residents and visitors to Abingdon by 9 offering international and specialty foods, over 80 teas, gifts, and local art. We appreciate our loyal customers that think shopping local is important,” says shop owner, Robin Ferrell. The Abingdon Main Street “Business Of The Month” program began this month and will feature a different Main Street business each month. Necessities was selected as the first featured business as a result of winning the Abingdon Main Street holiday window display contest, as voted on by local residents and shoppers on December 10. “We felt that as part of our organizational mission of showcasing our local businesses, we had an excellent opportunity to add another layer of promotion each month by developing this program,’ says Jennifer Montgomery, Executive Director of Abingdon Main Street. “We’re excited about this effort and look forward to making a difference in raising awareness of what our downtown businesses have to offer.” Abingdon Main Street is a 501 C 3 and is designated as an accredited Main Street America™ program for meeting rigorous performance standards set by the National Main Street Center and is recognized for its exemplary commitment to preservation-based economic development and community revitalization through the Main Street Approach®. Abingdon Main Street’s programs include community events such as Main Street Busker Fest, and the Abingdon Wolf Project “Who’s Afraid of Virginia’s Wolves,” as well as leveraging grant programs and sponsorships to support small businesses. For more information on Abingdon Main Street, including upcoming events and ways to get involved, visit www.AbingdonMainStreet. com or call 276-492-2237.
Abingdon Main Street has announced Necessities as its first designated Abingdon Main Street “Business Of The Month” for December, 2016. Located at 226 West Main Street in Abingdon, Necessities is a shop featuring local, international and specialty foods, gift baskets and local art.
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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T
he Giachi family has been involved in wine production for over three centuries, since, in 1720 Bartolomeo Giachi left Florence and moved to Ulignano, settling permanently with his family in the prestigious house, business center of high quality grape land. As winery estate owner Pierluigi Giachi says, "We will spend together 2 hours of wine, olive oil and balsamic tasting, discovering how to taste, choose and pair a wine, laughing and having fun together!"
The "wine school" evening together will consist of: Tuscan products to taste. Pairing food together with the wine tasting. Pierluigi's Wine school: Learn how wine is made in Tuscany, how the soil, the climate and the history made Tuscan wine one of the best around. Appetizers: Salami and Cheese, Bruschetta (bread with olive oil), and light snacks. Wine: Brunello di Montalcino Wine: Terrestre Super Tuscan Riserva Luxury Wine Wine: Bartolomeo Super Tuscan Riserva Wine: Baldassarre Super Tuscan Riserva Wine: Cavaliere Super Tuscan Riserva Wine: Chianti Wine: Chianti Classico Wine: Vernaccia of San Gimignano Extra Virgin Olive Oil: Varietal Extra Virgin Olive Oil: Truffle Infused Balsamic Vinegar: 25 Year Old Traditional Dessert Wine: VinBeato The full complimentary tasting bars of Olive Oil Divine will be open and we are offering a 10% discount to paid attendees on all regular priced items for purchases made (excludes vintner product) the evening of this event! More event info can be found at www.oliveoildivine.com Independently owned and operated by Greg and Shirley Mueller, Olive Oil Divine is located at the Shoppes at Peerless Center, 2517 North Roan St., Johnson City, Tenn. For more information about Olive Oil Divine, call 423-707-7087 or visit www.oliveoildivine.com.
Tickets sold for $45/each. Must be 21 years old to attend.
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theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
WINES AND VINTNER OF TUSCANO
Olive Oil Devine hosts
Olive Oil Divine owners Greg & Shirley Mueller will be hosting the Tenuta Torciano Winery team at Olive Oil Divine in Johnson City, TN on January 18 and 20, 2017 from 6:30-8:30pm to present a private, evening edition of the world famous "Wine School".
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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New Year's Day
FIRST SUNRISE There are sunrises, and then there are Grandfather Mountain sunrises. And then there are Grandfather Mountain New Year’s Day sunrises. Ring in an epic New Year on Sunday, Jan. 1, for Grandfather Mountain’s first sunrise opportunity of 2017, and share a community breakfast buffet with your fellow early risers. Sunrise opportunities allow guests the rare chance to visit the popular Linville, N.C., nature preserve and travel attraction before regular operating hours. “These events are popular among photographers of all skill levels, as well as nature lovers hoping to see the Blue Ridge Mountains in a new light,” said Frank Ruggiero, director of marketing and communications for the Grandfather Mountain Stewardship Foundation, the nonprofit organization that oversees the park. “Sunrise on Grandfather Mountain is nothing short of magnificent.” Sunrise is at 7:38 a.m. Jan. 1, 2017, and Grandfather’s gates will open at 6:30 a.m. Due to safety regulations, participants may only visit the Mile High Swinging Bridge area during the event. Guests are encouraged to bring a flashlight and wear heavy winter jackets, hats, gloves and rubber-soled shoes, as there may be slick surfaces on the mountain. The event may be cancelled upon short notice in case of inclement weather.
Spectators and photographers gather to watch the sunrise from atop Grandfather Mountain. The mountain will host a New Year’s Day sunrise opportunity on Jan. 1, 2017. Photo by Frank Ruggiero | Grandfather Mountain Stewardship Foundation
Admission to the New Year’s sunrise opportunity and breakfast costs $20, in addition to general admission. Guests are free to remain in the park all day, but those who leave before 9:30 a.m. will have their general admission charge refunded. Bridge Club members, who receive free admission to the mountain, will only pay $15 for the sunrise and breakfast. The event is open to no more than 40 participants, and registration is required. To register, contact Amy Renfranz at 828-733-4326 or amy@ grandfather.com.
Reservations are not necessary and there is no fee for the dinner. Just bring your family and friends and some holiday spirit to share. We welcome everyone to partake in the joy of Christmas as we share a wonderful meal and a fun-filled evening of fellowship, entertainment, and caroling. Late parishioner and Bristol businessman, Jack Trayer, began the Christmas Dinner at Emmanuel in 1981. In the wake of the recession that year and with unemployment and inflation soaring, Trayer recognized the need to offer assistance to the families in our area. With the cooperation of then rector, George Bunn, Jack Trayer funded the first dinner in December of 1981 and remained an active benefactor and participant in the event until his death in 2006. Jack’s wife, Loretta, and many church volunteers carry on this annual tradition. For additional information please contact Emmanuel Episcopal Church at 276-669-9488 or emmanuelbristol@gmail.com.
GO RED THIS SEASON
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CodeRED Code Red is the local 911 Center’s emergency notification system. The system is designed so that the 911 Center can notify city residents and businesses of certain situations within the City. For example in the event the National Weather Service issues a tornado warning specifically for the City of Bristol, TN, the center will send out a Code Red notification via phone lines, emails and/or text messages to warn the community. Other examples would be an endangered missing person, a disaster situation, or other major events. A citizen may go to the city website at\www.bristoltn.org and click on the Code RED scroll located at the top of the home page, there one may either opt into the system to be notified, or one may choose to opt out. The City currently has only land line numbers in the system and as most are aware, there are lots of people that no longer have land line numbers. Citizens are strongly encouraged to add their additional information, including cell phone numbers, emails and/or text message information. The Code RED system is not used for anything but situations in which the Bristol Tennessee Police Department feels there is an urgent need for citizen attention in regard to the community’s
safety. For more information or assistance in setting up the Code Red system with your information, please contact Community Relations at 423-9895500, Ext. 2052.
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
Christmas Dinner
35TH ANNUAL CHRISTMAS DINNER
Emmanuel Episcopal Church will once again open its doors to the community for the Annual Christmas Dinner. Emmanuel has welcomed to the community to this even for 35 years. This year the Christmas celebration will be Sunday, December 25 from 4:00-6:00 pm, 700 Cumberland Street, Bristol, Virginia, and will include all the traditional holiday dinner trimmings.
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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SO THIS IS
CHRISTMAS
The other night I was getting my seasonal singles out of the box they’re stored in. These are my Christmas 45s in my record collection, seven inch pieces of wax that have been around forever. One of my favorites is the original pressing I have of “Happy Xmas (War is Over)” by John Lennon. A lucky find from several years back, with the original picture sleeve, pressed on green vinyl.
Batteries Not Included
By Andy Ross aross@ theloaferonline.com
I took the 45 over to my turntable, placed it on the platter, hit the start button, then put the needle on the record. It’s always been a favorite of mine, even when I was a kid and I had no idea who the singer was. It was just that song that came on the radio every year that began with “So this is Christmas.” As the song played I began to--as I tend to do each Christmas season-- become reflective over the year. 2016 has been a year where the amount of world suck has been overwhelming. Even I, someone who is optimistic almost to a fault, has had a bit of a time processing it. As these thoughts swirled through my mind, so did the lyrics of the song. When the chorus of “A very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year” played, the part that goes “Let’s hope it’s a good one, without any fear” kicked to my brain more than usual. I couldn’t help but note that more people seem very Christmassy this year than usual. That early, pre-Thanksgiving,
decorations didn’t bother folks as much as it tends to. My mother, miss “It’s Not Even Thanksgiving,” wasn’t bothered at all by any of it. Perhaps in taking a cue from that song from the musical “Mame” this year has left us all “Needing a little Christmas.” Regardless if you celebrate Christmas or not, I hope that whatever you get out of this time of the year has been found for you. I hope you’ve been able to wrap you and your loved ones up in a big blanket of love, joy, and whatever else you needed. I hope you’ll see the good in the world when it appears, and it’s out there--trust me. I hope that you and the ones you love will have a most Merry Christmas. I hope Santa will fill the bottom of your tree with a real bounty, I hope you’ll eat well, laugh greatly, and find time to play Scrabble while sipping hot cocoa. Basically, I hope the best for you and everyone around you this Christmas, and in the coming year.
PARTY
Pop Life
By Ken Silvers ksilvers@ theloaferonline.com
This is the season of egg nog, parties, twinkling lights, parades, elves on shelves, and Christmas movies playing at your local cinema. The latest film set during Christmas hoping to win over a festive feeling crowd is "Office Christmas Party". I will begin by saying this film is rated "R", so you should know what you are getting into before you hit the theater. The stars Jason Bateman as Josh Parker, a Chief Tech Officer for a company called Zenotek, and T.J. Miller as his boss Clay. The film also features Jennifer Aniston as Clay's sister Carol, the intermediate CEO for Zenotek, and Olivia Munn as Tracey, as Josh's head of tech. The film opens with the newly divorced Josh attempting to save his branch of Zenotek after Carol threatens to close the facility due to missed quarterly quotas. In an attempt to ward of Carol's threats, Josh, Clay and Tracey devise a plan to convince financial giant Walter Davis (Courtney B. Vance) to team with Zenotek. Carol agrees to give the trio a short window to close the deal, and tells the trio in order to save money the annual office Christmas party has been canceled. As expected, or we would have no movie, Clay ignores his sisters demand, and plans a party to end all parties, and invites Walter to the massive event in hopes of persuading him to partner with the company. There are plenty of office "characters" on hand, including the "by the rules" Head of Human Resources Mary (Kate McKinnon), and Nate (Karon Soni), who has the girlfriend no one has ever seen. As for the party, there are tons of decorations, live animals, a "Game of Thrones" throne where Santa will sit, a huge dance floor, a snow making machine, and a controversial ice drink dispensing sculpture, all on two floors of the office building. Unfortunately the party eventually includes an professional escort, and an unexpected appearance by that infamous white powdery drug which is mistaken for the aforementioned fake snow. Walter does make it to the office party, and reveals he will not agree to a partnership with the company, and is about to depart when he accidentally comes in contact with the "snow", which sends him into hyper mode. Meanwhile, Carol has been waiting at the Chicago airport for a flight to London, but is thwarted by a snow storm, and heads back to the office building after discovering the Christmas party has not been canceled. She has an immediate run-in with Clay, and reveals she is still closing the branch. As if this isn't bad enough, during the party Clay unknowingly drives away with a female pimp, and finds himself in deep trouble. Soon Josh, Mary, Tracey and Carol are off in Mary's Kia to track down Clay. Of course, Clay is found, and because of a nearly tragic incident, makes good with his sister. In addition, due to a tech invention Tracey has come up with, the company is saved from closing. However, upon returning to the office, the group finds the offices appearing as if a tornado has swept through. Despite all the chaos, all ends well for the dysfunctional siblings and their co-workers. All the actors in the film appear to be having a blast in their roles, due in no part, I'm sure, to the foolishness at hand. Aniston's character is like a hybrid between Joan Crawford and "Dynasty's" Alexis Carrington, but her face is so sweet, you can never really believe she could be so mean. Frankly, Bateman's character is one we have seen in many of his other films, so don't expect anything new from him. The highlight, or lowlight, depending on how you feel about this film, would be T.J. Miller's lovable but goofy Clay, who dominates all his scenes. The film is very adult oriented, and despite efforts to shock, often falls flat. I really wish Hollywood could find a way to make a holiday film as funny and classic as "Christmas Vacation". Instead we are left with the lump of coal know as "Office Christmas Party". (Rated R) 2 Reindeer (out of 4)
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
OFFICE CHRISTMAS
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Spotlight
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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- FRIDAY - Dec. 23rd -
- TUESDAY - Dec. 20th -
Downtown Country
Jiggy Ray’s Pizzeria
If you or your band are playing in the upcoming week and would like to be in The Spotlight, call in advance to (423) 283-4324 or go online to: theloaferonline.com. Due to last minute cancellations or changes, please call the location to confirm.
The Billy Crawford Band Bone Fire Smokehouse
- SATURDAY - Dec. 24th -
Open Mic
Acoustic Coffeehouse
- WEDNESDAY - Dec. 21st -
Open Mic
The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room
- SUNDAY - Dec. 25th -
MERRY CHRISTMAS - MONDAY -Dec. 26th -
The Diamonds
Brad Blackwell
Open Mic
Open Mic w/ Glen Diamond
Rock’s Wood Fired Pizza & Grill
Acoustic Coffeehouse
Model City Tap House
Rock’s Wood Fired Pizza & Grill
Spencer Ryan / Sunflowers & Sin Acoustic Coffeehouse
- THURSDAY - Dec. 22nd -
Adam McMillan
Rainbow Asian Cuisine
Brinkley Addington Sleepy Owl Brewery
The Diamonds
Blackbird Bakery
Live Music
Bone Fire Smokehous
- FRIDAY - Dec. 23rd -
“Dirty White Lies, Field Notes & RBTS WIN”
Capone’s
Skeletonpecker / Joey Tucciarone / Jessie A.M. / Isla Ross
The Hideaway
The Ian Feathers Band
Bristol Brewery
Shake It Like A Caveman Woodstone Deli
Adam McMillan
Hungry I at The Apex
Sulphur Springs String Dippers
Sleepy Owl Brewery
Loose Leaves
Acoustic Coffeehouse
for show time & more details, visit
theloaferonline.com
O’Mainnin’s Pub 712 State St Bristol 423/844-0049
Bone Fire Smokehouse at the Hardware 260 W Main St Abingdon Va 276/623-0037
Rainbow Asian Cuisine 2412 N. Roan St. Johnson City 423/ 232-6688
Bristol Brewery 41 Piedmont Ave Bristol VA 276/ 608-1220
Rock’s Wood Fired Pizza & Grill 3119 Bristol Hwy. Johnson City 423 / 262-0444
Capone’s 227 E Main St Johnson City 423/928-2295
Sleepy Owl Brewery 151 E. Main St. Kingsport 423/390-8476
The Hideaway 235 E. Main St Johnson City 423/926-3896
The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room 216 E Main St Johnson City
Jiggy Ray’s 610 E. Elk Ave Elizabethton 423/722-3410
KARAOKE
Model City Tap House 324 E Market St. Kingsport
Woodstone Deli 3500 Fort Henry Dr Kingsport 423/245-5424
TUESDAY Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment Boomershine’s Pizza Karaoke w/ Sean Dawg House Tavern Karaoke -Numan’s *********************** WEDNESDAY Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke American Legion Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment Smokey Bones - Johnson City Turn the Page Karaoke VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City *********************** THURSDAY Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment Macado’s - Kingsport Karaoke - Numan’s Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment CJ’s Sports Bar Karaoke Holiday Inn - Johnson City Karaoke - Jiggy Rays Pizzaria Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment Mellow Mushroom - Johnson City ***********************
“
FRIDAY Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke Sportsman’s Bar & Grill 9pm Karaoke Kingsport Moose Lodge Karaoke w/ Reverb Karaoke The Cottage 8:30 pm Turn the Page Karaoke VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City Karaoke - CJ’s Sports Bar Karaoke - Elizabethton VFW Karaoke w/ DJ Marques Holiday Inn (Exit 7) - Bristol VA Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment Moe’s Original BBQ Karaoke - Numan’s *********************** SATURDAY Karaoke - The Horseshoe Lounge Karaoke Kingsport Moose Lodge Turn the Page Karaoke VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment Macado’s - Kingsport Karaoke - Numan’s ***********************
Great little publication, with big things inside." Johnny G.
17 theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
SPOTLIGHT DIRECTORY
Blackbird Bakery 56 Piedmont Ave. Bristol VA 276/ 645-575
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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JOHN GLENN MEMORIES FROM MARQ T
he two heroes of my youth were NASA astronaut John Glenn and NFL quarterback Johnny Unitas.
Stargazer
By Mark Marquette since 1996 stargazermarq@ gmail.com
I never met “Johnny U,” who took the Baltimore Colts to prominence in the 1960s and died in 2002 at age 69. But once in a friend’s “Man Cave” I did try on the huge coat-cape he draped over his shoulder pads to keep warm. However, I sure have a lot of personal memories about my all-time hero, fellow Ohioan John Glenn. First as a space-boy fan and later as an Associated Press photographer, I’ve had several personal encounters with the second most famous American space traveler—next to another Ohio native and first man on the Moon, Neil Armstrong. The death of the astronaut, Senator and quintessential nice guy on Dec. 8 at age 95 was the end of an incredible American tale of success. A Korean War fighter pilot with the one of baseball’s greatest players, Ted Williams, as his wing man, John Glenn was unaware that brave, combat experience would lead to international fame as first a test pilot, and then a spaceman. When chosen as one of seven original NASA Mercury astronauts in 1959, Glenn quickly rose to the top of these amazing men, all with the “right stuff,” a term first used by author Tom Wolfe. Following the sub-orbital, 15-minute flights of Alan Shepard and Gus Grissom, a date with destiny awaited Glenn as he would become the first American to orbit the Earth, three times for nearly 5 hours. At age 41, he was the second human to orbit Earth, 10 months after the Soviet Union’s Yuri Gagarin. The month of February 1961 had Glenn patiently waiting inside the tiny Mercury capsule as 11 launch attempts were scrubbed because of problems. My family moved for a year to Winter Park, Florida and I was in the second grade in Winter Park, Florida, just 60 miles from Cape Canaveral and the launch pad. Each attempted launch the school teachers would bring in B&W televisions for us to watch and then the disappointing delay. At age 8 I was already interesting in astronomy and space, and I lived each launch attempt with my hero, John Glenn. A kid like me would go to sleep pretending in their bed to be throwing switches, talking to CapCom and looking out the spacecraft window. My space kid imagination was in bloom! I went to bed on Feb. 19, 1962 dreaming again of being John Glenn and ready to blast off Earth tomorrow morning. And, I woke up with the mumps! Yep, instead of going to school, I stayed at home with Mom. And watched CBS-TV with anchor Walter Cronkite covering the launch of Mercury Friendship 7 into space. That morning of Feb. 20 when the TV showed the Atlas rocket ignite and move (at 9:47 am), Mom and I rushed outside in the warm Florida day and I’ll never forget seeing the rocket rise above that distant horizon. It looked like a thin, white thread lacing the blue sky. Ironically, it’s the only rocket launch I’ve ever seen! But I certainly saw more of my hero, John Glenn. I spent the 1970s and 80s pursuing a career in journalism while taking college classes on astronomy at Ohio State University. And to help pay the bill, I was an Associated Press “stringer” working part-time nearly every day covering Ohio
news out of the state Capitol with my Nikon camera. Many times I covered an Ohio Senator John Glenn press conference in Columbus and other places. So as a professional photojournalist, I brushed shoulders with my hero four or five times. Now those were the days of no selfies (waste of a precious 24 frames of B&W film!), the AP filed my negatives away in New York City, and you never ask for autographs in the news area—so I have precious little mementos from my encounters with my space hero. Outside of a few extra photo prints I made and set aside in my AP file box, all I have are memories. But that’s enough! Because I got to share my launch-day mumps story with Astronaut/Senator Glenn. The first time I covered Glenn at a presser was in 1977 and he lingered around and ate with the reporters a spread of Wendy’s burgers, fries and malts (Ohio Gov. James Rhoades was an early investor in the infant restaurant chain). The meal for the newshounds dwindled and I found myself and two others sitting with Sen. Glenn. So I nervously shared the story of me, my mumps and Mom witnessing his infamous Mercury blastoff in our backyard. “What a fortunate time to get the mumps,” I’ll never forget John Glenn saying to me while gently grabbing my arm like friend. “Better you than me,” he said, and winked. And that big smile with such sincere eye contact. What a hero! I’m sure there are millions of Americans he’s personally touched like me. Millions. And so humble and warm in his demeanor. Yet intelligent and commanding when in the presence of the business at hand. His unsuccessful Presidential bids in 1976 and 1984 were an attempt to recapture that spirit of the right stuff. John Glenn is the top of the Mountain of Fame for me. How nerdy is that? And I’ve met my news-share of famous people, including plenty of other astronaut heroes. What is also amazing about this American icon is Glenn’s second trip to space at age 77 aboard Space Shuttle Discovery. The 10-day astronomy and bioscience mission with six other astronauts focused on Glenn’s health as the oldest space traveler—an age record that will stand a long test of time. After his 3-orbits of Earth in 1962, NASA put Glenn on the shelf deeming his fame too important to risk on another death-defying space mission. But Glenn went back to space for a 10-day mission because; well, because he was John Glenn! He wanted to do it while still in peak physical shape, and devised a whole mission profile for him to test the human body and its limits to aged astronauts. Glenn’s triumphant mission aboard Discovery was also a huge public relations coup for NASA and its construction of the International Space Station. It worked. The John Glenn magic was something to behold. They are all gone now. The Mercury Seven. Their lives were among the first uniquely scrutinized by the American media as the 1960s hopes and dreams of a nation weighed on their shoulders. They had the “Right Stuff.” Shepard, Grissom, Glenn, Carpenter, Schirra, Cooper and Slayton. And they have all left the planet on a trajectory for eternity. God speed, my heroes!
Christmas Week 2016 has planet Venus blazing brightly above the southwest horizon like a Christmas Star. And that goes double for bright
Jupiter in the morning sky. The Moon will be in the after midnight scene, so the evenings will be filled with starlight. AND, it will officially be Winter this week, the solstice being Wednesday. Tues. Dec. 20 The Moon is at Last Quarter, rising at 1 am. The late night finds Orion the Hunter beginning his dominance of the celestial realm with his canine companions Canis Major and Minor. Behold the beauty of the Universe as you safely celebrate the holidays. Wed. Dec. 21 Winter Solstice at 5:44 pm when the Sun stands over the Tropic of Capricorn. Remember, south of the equator is celebrating Summer— so to warm up, check out those beaches in Rio and Sydney! On this 1968 date in space history, the world was excited as the world’s most powerful rocket, Saturn V, blasted off Cape Kennedy, Florida with Apollo 8 atop and three astronauts bound for an orbital mission to the Moon, 240,000 miles away. Thurs. Dec. 22 An inspiring morning celestial scene as the crescent Moon, Jupiter and star Spica stand in a straight line in Virgo. Rising together at 3 am, the three celestial objects in conjunction with each other will put on a show until twilight drowns them out around 7 am—the Moon lingering in our morning blue sky.
19 Fri. Dec. 23 The night sky can be a sanctuary of structure and sanity from the craziness of holiday shopping. Taurus, Auriga, Orion and Gemini are rising in the east, their brilliant stars adding some brilliant “bling” in the sky. Go outside and recharge with some fresh air and starlight. Each point of light is a world of its own, there for you to enjoy and wonder. Sat. Dec. 24 In 1968, Apollo 8 orbited the Moon with three Americans, a triumph that led to the July 1969 landing by Apollo 11. That Christmas Eve, astronauts read from the book of Genesis during a live broadcast, the camera showing the moving cratered terrain below. Frank Borman, Jim Lovell and Bill Anders are still alive to relive that historic space mission. Sun. Dec. 25 Christmas Day. Born on this day in 1642 is one of the world’s quintessential geniuses Isaac Newton. He is known best for figuring out the mystery of gravity and invention of the reflecting, mirror telescope. But two little known facts about Newton are he pursued alchemy in the quest to make gold and was a scholar of the Bible. FYI, among those also born on Christmas Day are: Humphrey Bogart and Jimmy Buffett Mon. Dec. 26 Anybody getting a Christmas telescope has the Moon to get acquainted with. There are usually three lenses with even the cheapest telescope… say, a 25 mm, 10 mm and 6 mm. Stargazers don’t like real high power because it distorts things and makes it hard to keep steady. The higher the number the lower the power, so put that 25 mm in the telescope and experience 80-100x power. The 12-10mm lenses will give about 200x power, and that 6-4mm lens is almost worthless at close to 400x on anything but the Moon.
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
THIS WEEK
SKIES
Celestial events in the skies for the week of Dec. 20-26, 2016, as compiled for The Loafer by Mark D. Marquette.
FEASTDIXIE IN STAMPEDE DIXIE
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Pigeon Forge is home to many of East Tennessee’s most visited and loved attractions, from the Titanic Museum and Dollywood to The Wheel at the Island and Parrot Mountain. What the city is most known for are its plethora of theaters and shows. Right now during the holiday season, many of these have Christmas performances that add a touch of magic to the already breathtaking performances. This past weekend we decided to visit the world-famous Dixie Stampede, as well as the newest dinner show on the Parkway, Dolly Parton’s Lumberjack Adventure.
Appalachian Wanderers
By Jason & Daniel Worley jdworley@ theloaferonline.com
Dixie Stampede will be celebrating its 30th anniversary next year, and the dinner attraction has been a favorite stop for many visitors to the Smokies throughout the last three decades. Whether you’ve had the opportunity to visit in the past or not, we highly recommend making another visit during this Christmas season. Not only does the holiday show add new and unique experiences to the amazing lineup, but the theater recently renovations which transformed the arena into something truly magical. If you’ve been to Dixie before, you know how large of a part the animals play, especially the horses. Amazing horseback riding and stunts such as the jump through a ring of fire are always our favorite part of the show. The antics of the racing pigs are hard to beat though, as are the miniature pony races held at Skeeter Downs. Who can forget Skeeter and his giant dancing chicken, aptly named Nugget? While the majority of the show stays the same, there are some major changes and new scenes thrown in throughout November and December. Instead of the audience being divided between the American North and South, it’s the North and South poles who are feuding. The Island of Misfit Toys makes an appearance as giant versions of favorite childhood toys come to life to sing and dance at the stroke of midnight. Everyone’s favorite scene seems to be the recreation of that first Christmas night, complete with goats, sheep, and camels parading the arena. We would continue to come to Dixie Stampede even if it was just for the food. The dinner is fantastic and just as good as the show, maybe even better! Roasted chicken, corn on the cob, baked potatoes, and delicious cheese biscuits are just a portion of the feast you’ll enjoy. It’s almost like an early Christmas dinner without the ham! If you fall in love with the vegetable cream soup as much as
we did, you’ll be delighted to know that you can pick up your own mix in the gift shop so you can enjoy it at home as well. Lumberjack Adventure is located just up the parkway near The Island. Formerly known as Lumberjack Feud, Dolly purchased the show last year and revamped it. The building and stage was completely renovated, and a much larger parking lot was added as well. We never got the chance to visit when it was known as Lumberjack Feud, but our experience at the new show was fantastic! Unlike Dixie Stampede, the show arena is much smaller, actually only about half the size. While this may seem like a bad thing, it actually allows everyone to sit much closer to the stage and be immersed completely in the action. By a stroke of luck, we were able to get front row seats, and the actors weren’t more than five feet away from our table. Also different from Dixie is much of the show’s overall content. Lumberjack Adventure is a stage show, mainly focusing the acrobatics, stunts, and feats of skill performed by the lumberjacks. No horses will be found here, but the hunting dogs and their tricks more than make up for it. What actually is similar to Dixie is the competition. This time we are split up between two feudin’ families known as the McGregors and the Wheelers. When the local lumber mill falls into disrepair and their way of life they’re used to falls apart, the families decide to have a contest to see which family is better at being lumberjacks than the other. Whoever wins gets to keep the mill. Logrolling, wood chopping, and tree climbing are just some of the high-flying antics you’ll Lumberjacks race to saw through a log during a competition at Dolly Parton's Lumberjack Adventure.
get to enjoy while chomping down on a dinner that is just as good as that over in Dixieland. The coleslaw and pork barbeque are great, as is the peach turnover dessert. I would say we actually enjoyed the Lumberjack Adventure more than Dixie Stampede, if only we could get some of that vegetable cream soup over there! If you are able to, however, try to visit both of these great attractions. No doubt you’ll return to make even more memories as we have done for the past few years. It may even become a holiday tradition as it has become for so many others. Whichever you decide to visit, remember it’s best to make reservations as early as possible. Both shows fill up very quickly, and every time we have gone they have been completely sold out. Please visit lumberjackadventure.com or dixiestampede.com to make reservations for either of the shows!
STUMPED
Recently, while braving the wilds of Facebook, I came across a post about how both Pokémon and Tickle Me Elmo turned twenty this year, and how that is supposed to make us all feel old. Well, ok. I guess it's kind of amusing to think about getting old if you're part of that cohort of people who were into those things back in 1996. But to anyone older than that, which I think is still most people, calling these folks 'old' is kind of an insult.
The Trivial Traveler
By Brian McManus brian@ theloaferonline.com
I just turned 39, but even I know to keep my trap shut lest some forty-something come out of nowhere to smack me with a ruler and tell me to get off his lawn. So with that in mind, let me tell you about Prometheus, a Bristlecone Pine tree that ought to make all of us feel young again. For those who haven't spent much time Out West, the Bristlecone Pine, or Pinus longaeva, is a twisted, wretchedlooking excuse for a conifer that flourishes at higher altitudes and can be found from eastern California and over to Colorado. The amazing thing about them though, is their epic longevity. Many specimens are thousands of years old, and the oldest among them were already there centuries before Egyptians got the idea to build the pyramids. Just think, somebody could've hatched the idea for the Sphinx while sitting under a tree you can still see today – that is, if only the geography had worked out. Given that so many Bristlecone Pines have managed to cheat death for as long as they have, the species has naturally become a significant focus of interest among researchers. Such was the case in 1964 for a graduate student named Donald Currey, who was studying ice age glaciology on Wheeler Peak in eastern Nevada. Understanding that Bristlecone Pines can live thousands of years and that studying them might yield insights about the environment from which they originated, Currey received permission from the National Park Service to take core samples on some of the specimens that he thought might be particularly old. He was interested in counting the annual growth rings in order to see just how old they were, and focused specifically on one particular tree that locals had taken to calling Prometheus - so named for the figure from Greek mythology who stole fire from Mount Olympus and gave it to mankind. Well, after breaking three of his tree boring tools while trying to get a useful sample from Prometheus, Currey asked if it would be alright to just cut the damn thing down and count the rings later. In their infinite wisdom, the Park service gave him the goahead to do so. Spoiler Alert: This was a bad move. When the rings were finally counted from the stump, they added up to 4,862 – enough to qualify Prometheus as the (formerly) oldest living organism ON EARTH. Of course, nobody knew this at the time or else, one would hope, it would not have been felled to begin with. Nevertheless, the deed had been done. Criticism was heaped upon both Currey and the NPS, to which the latter responded by stepping up preservation efforts, ultimately leading to the creation of Great Basin National Park (where you can still see the stump of Prometheus off trail or view a cross-section of it at the visitors' center). For his part, we can assume that Currey said he was really, really sorry and promised to never, ever kill something that old again.
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OLD AGE HAS ME
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PRESIDENT ELECT TRUMP AND
GUN LAWS
Over the past eight years the Firearms industry has seen record growth. It started with election of Barrack Obama, as many Americans felt that the new democratic President would push for stricter gun laws and a ban on Assault rifles and high cap magazines, then the Tragedy at Sandy hook took place, which prompted many gun grabbing politicians to make a run at gun control in the United States.
Outdoor Life
By Matt Messer matt@ theloaferonline.com
These two main events prompted Americans to come out in groves buying guns ammo and accessories. This created large shortages in the firearm industry, record sales and gun company's stocks have sky rocketed throughout the Obama administration. For example Sturm, Ruger & Co. is an American, firearm manufacturing company, better known by the shortened name Ruger. The company was founded in 1949 by Alexander McCormick Sturm and William B. Ruger and has been publicly traded since 1969. Ruger produces bolt-action, semi-automatic, and single-shot rifles, shotguns, semi-automatic pistols, and single- and double-action revolvers. In Oct of 2008 its stock traded for around 10 dollars a share today it trades for more than 50 dollars a share. Today we have much different look on the future of gun laws, with President elect Donald trump set to take office as the 45th President of the United States. BearingArms.com reported on November 9th 2016 in an article by Bob Owens. A fast five list of gun laws Trump and the republican controlled house and senate could pass in the first 90-180 days. http://bearingarms.com/bob-o/2016/11/09/five-fast-gun-lawreforms-president-trump-will-make/ Ending Gun-Free Zones On Military Bases President Trump will have the authority to executive authority to pass an executive order allowing the United States military to carry firearms on duty. Our domestic military bases and facilities have been the site of numerous terror attacks and mass shootings. Trump can reverse that with the stroke of a pen. He would also apparently have the authority to end firearm bans on other federal property, but there are so many laws and regulations that I don’t want to make that claim prematurely. National Concealed Carry Reciprocity There is significant momentum towards establishing national concealed carry reciprocity in all 50 states. President Trump, working with a Republican-controlled House and Senate, should be able to get this passed into law within the first 90 days. There are four different bills to choose from in the House and Senate. Legalizing Silencers Making a hearing safety device criminal was one of the dumbest things ever done under the Administration of Franklin D. Roosevelt… and that’s saying a lot. The Hearing Protection Act is already written and has co-sponsors. It should be passed within the first 60 days of President Trump’s administration, which is a blessing to high-volume shooters such as myself who would like to better protect our hearing. NICS Background Check Reform Gun control supporters want a “universal” background checks on all gun purchases in order to create a de facto gun registry… and that’s just not going to happen. What is going to happen is that President Trump, the House, and Senate are going to work on legislation to close the gaping holes in the existing background check system so that it is more effective, ensuring better and more accurate updating of prohibited persons. This will likely run in conjunction with mental health reform to both help people in crisis obtain the help they need, and ensure that fears of losing their Second Amendment rights won’t keep people from seeking help for a temporary but important mental health crisis. Allow Importation of Collectable Historical Firearms President Obama has stymied the importation of historically significant firearms provided to allies after the Second World War and the Korean War through executive orders. The Collectible Firearms Protection Act will allow the reimportation of hundreds of thousands of M1 Garand’s, M1 Carbines, and M1911 pistols. These are five laws that a Republican Congress and President Trump can pass within the first 90-180 days, but they are not the only laws being considered." Either way gun owners and sportsmen alike can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that the new administration has no intentions of further restricting their gun rights or causing mass shortages of firearms, ammunition, or high capacity magazines.
RUDOLPH’S TUNDRA The Casual Word
By Langley Shazor Follow Langley at TheCasualWord
Dashing and dancing Prancing in the snow Vixens search for hidden morsels Beneath comet laced skies Cupid’s arrows sail through the auroras Back on Earth Donner’s party is taking place Uncharted Territory New discoveries A blitzen of light Briefly reveals a cornucopia of life At this latitude Red-nosed homosapiens dare not venture But the beauty of this place is too alluring So we brave the elements Just to get a glimpse The wonder of nature’s hands
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ABCs
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A is for Abingdon Olive Oil
G is for Gifts Galore from Mac’s Medicine Mart
B is for Baked with love at Another Touch Bakery
H is for Heavenly Stitches
C is for Christmas Cocktails with Jonesborough Wine & Spirits
I is for iReverse Home Loans
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Christmas
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of
D is for Dalton Direct Carpets
J is for Johnny’s Shoe Store
E is for Express Oil Change
K is for Kingsport Piranhas
F is for Family Medicine at Horizon Family Medicine
L is for Liquor & wine at Parkway Discount Wine & Liquor
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ABCs Christmas O is for Old Time Virginia Homes
of
U is for Uncle Sam’s Loan Office
P is for Pit Row Wine & Liquor
V is for Victoria at West Main Antiques
Q is for Quickway Printing
W is for Washington Co. Co-op
R is for Rainbow Motors
X is for Xtreme Lashes by Sher Extensions
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N is for New looks begin at Studio 33
M is for Mulligans’s Gaming
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S is for Sexton’s Wrecker Service & Towing
Y is for you should be Stellar!
T is for Tan Tanks are US! Admiral Propane
Z is for Zoom on up and see the wolves! Bays Mountain Park
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Answers on page 30
Millye is a 2 year old Lab mix. She is spayed and up to date on all vaccines. She is a sweet and playful girl ready to go home for Christmas!
Jasper is a 3 year old retriever mix. He is neutered and up to date on all vaccines. A beautiful and sweet dog!
The Bridge Home has an ongoing aluminum can can collection in front of the shelter at 2061 Hwy 75 in Blountville,TN 37617. The cans are collected by a volunteer and the money from the aluminum goes towards badly needed food and supplies for the animals The Bridge Home No Kill Animal Rescue has started a pet food pantry for people that have had financial hardships because of job loss or medical problems and are struggling to feed their pet. They can come by the shelter and get cat or dog food to get through the tough time. Donations can be sent to The Bridge Home Shelter PO Box 654 Blountville, TN 37617 Every animal in their care is spayed or neutered and fully vaccinated before being adopted. Being a non profit the shelter is funded entirely by membership dues and private donations. They always need volunteers or monetary donations.
Other always needed items:pet food, cat litter & cat toys dog treats & dog toys,paper towels, cleaners, office supplies,Purina weight circles. Phone: 423.239.5237 Hours are Mon-Fri 12pm-6pm Sat 12pm-3pm and Sun 2pm-4pm. Website is www. bridgehomerescue@gmail.com or like them on Facebook: www. Facebook.com/bridgehome
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PETS
OF THE WEEK
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THINGS TO DO Saint Paul’s Christmas Dinner Saint Paul’s Episcopal Church in Kingsport will host its annual Christmas Day dinner for anyone in the community wanting to enjoy a festive meal with others. Turkey, dressing and all the trimmings are provided by Holston Valley Medical Center, with home-baked desserts made by Saint Paul’s parishioners. The meal is served from 3 – 5 pm on Dec. 25 in the church parish hall on the corner of Watauga St. and Ravine Rd. There is no charge to attend, and all are welcome.
Here’s how to take a refreshing break from the Christmas Shopping Rush.... The “Limited Edition” band will be playing our favorite fun dance music on the 4th Friday of this month, December 23rd,
at the Jonesborough Visitors Center located at 117 Boone St. If you have never visited this dance, this is the one you won’t want to miss! While it is billed as a Ballroom Dance, a variety of music is played from the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s that provides enjoyable dance opportunities for everyone...can you still do the Twist? Also, Line Dance Sessions are offered at 6:30 and during the break. The dance goes from 7:0010:00 pm and cost is only $6.00. For additional information call 423-943-4190. If you would like to receive a monthly email listing of local dances simply send an email request to tricitiesdanceinfo@ gmail.com.
Emmanuel Episcopal Church 36th Annual Christmas Dinner Emmanuel Episcopal Church will once again open its doors to the community for the Annual
Christmas Dinner. Emmanuel has welcomed the community to this event for 35 years. This year the Christmas celebration will be Sunday, December 25 from 4:006:00 pm, 700 Cumberland Street, Bristol, Virginia, and will include all the traditional holiday dinner trimmings. Reservations are not necessary and there is no fee for the dinner. Just bring your family and friends and some holiday spirit to share. We welcome everyone to partake in the joy of Christmas as we share a wonderful meal and a fun-filled evening of fellowship, entertainment, and caroling. For additional information please contact Emmanuel Episcopal Church at 276-6699488 or emmanuelbristol@gmail. com.
Teaching on The Crooked Road Course Offered at WCC The rich history and musical traditions of Southwest Virginia will be examined in a Wytheville Community College course designed to provide K-12 teachers with the materials and methods they need to incorporate “The Crooked Road” into their lesson plans. This will be a hybrid course involving both in-class and online instruction. Teaching on the Crooked Road will be taught by David Winship, a retired public school teacher and former curator/education Director for Bristol’s Birthplace
of Country Music (BCM). Winship developed the Living Legacies program of the BCM for the Library of Congress Folklife Collection and has provided the Smithsonian Institution with traditional music materials. The Crooked Road: Virginia’s Heritage Music Trail supports tourism and economic development in Southwest Virginia by celebrating and preserving this Appalachian region's unique musical and cultural heritage. The Trail itself covers 330 miles and connects Rocky Mount in Franklin County to Breaks Interstate Park in Dickenson County. The class will meet for on the third Saturday of the beginning months of 2017 (January through May) from 1 – 9 p.m. at Wytheville Community College and will include attendance at WCC’s Old Time and Bluegrass Jamboree from 7 –9 p.m. There will be one Saturday field trip to the two country music museums in Bristol and the Carter Family Fold in Hiltons, VA. The cost is $225.00. Music instruction is not a core element of the course and it is not necessary to play an instrument to participate. This course is offered through Wytheville Community College – Workforce Development. For further information, contact Perry Hughes, Director, Workforce Development, at phughes@wcc. vccs.edu or 276-223-4757.
Gray Fossil Site & Museum January Calendar of Events
Now - Sunday, January 15th Curious Coal Celebrate Miner's Day by learning about the link between coal and fossils. Get an up close and personal look by examining coal specimens and core samples. Programs announced periodically throughout each day. Tuesday, January 17th Sunday, February 19th Be Miocene! Our love of fossils will never go extinct, and we hope yours won't either! Join us and discover why we love the fossil specimens found right here in our "backyard" and why they have a special place in our hearts. Programs announced periodically throughout each day. 1212 Suncrest Drive, Gray, TN 37615. 423-439-3659
MPCC to offer Finding Mindfulness Through Meditation class
Memorial Park Community Center, 510 Bert St., will offer a free course on Finding Mindfulness Through Meditation for ages 12 and older on Tuesdays beginning Jan. 10. From 3:30-5 p.m., participants will have a safe, comfortable space to meditate. Please register in person at Memorial Park Community Center, Monday through Friday, 7 a.m.-9 p.m., and Saturday, 9 a.m.5 p.m. For more information, please call 423-434-5749.
Cryptogram: Simulated disorder postulates perfect discipline; simulated fear postulates courage; simulated weakness postulates strength. Drop Quote: "Never become so much of an expert that you stop gaining expertise. View life as a continuous learning experience."
CHRISTMAS
Two pieces from BBC.com, both written by Renuka Rayasam, somehow struck me as appropriate subjects for this little Christmas week meditation. Perhaps only I would find a connection between these articles and Christmas, but finding odd connections is what “Kelly’s Place” has been about for the past twenty-seven years. At least this year I am not providing you with my occasional guide to gaudy Christmas home and lawn art, if you can call the recent invasion of inflatables art.
Kelly’s Place
By Jim Kelly since 1989 jkelly@ theloaferonline.com
The first of these articles concerns itself with telephobia, or the fear of telephones. According to Rayasam, although we live in an era of mobile technology, “many people still suffer from a true, deep fear of making a phone call.” Oddly, several telephobia sufferers “might be comfortable delivering a talk in a room full of strangers or might send dozens of text messages a day, but get shivers when they need to talk on the phone.” It appears that this phone fear is not related to a fear of technology per se, but instead reflects our increasing apprehension of talking to someone directly without the intervention of the more impersonal text or social media post. Sherry Turkle writes about this in her must-read book from last year, RECLAIMING CONVERSATION, a study of the ways we are avoiding awkward face-to-face interactions in our mobile world. Of course, telephobia is not entirely new, because ever since the invention of the telephone, there have been many who dislike using it, especially those who have a fear of making sales calls. Rayasam cites a 1986 study, THE PSYCHOLOGY OF SALES CALL RELUCTANCE, co-written by George Dudley and Shannon Goodson, to support her case. Needless to say, the fairly recent development of telemarketing only increases telephobia among not only those who receive these annoying calls (admittedly less frequent with the advent of smartphones) but also among those who work in these types of businesses. Michael Landers, the director of a group called Culture Crossings that offers consulting on navigating the treacherous waters of international relations, tells us that “across cultures the fear of the phone closely relates to a fear of being rejected, whether that means asking for an appointment with someone or trying to close a deal.” It’s much easier to send a text or a tweet, as witnessed by the large numbers of us who prefer breaking up a relationship in any way except in person (see Aziz Ansari’s clever book MODERN ROMANCE for a treatment of this phenomenon). Telephobia probably explains why most people are not purchasing smartphones because they make and receive phone calls, but because they can text, tweet, and take pictures. Our next little modern problem is something called Scattered Brain Syndrome, which has to do with the phenomenon of multitasking and the endless distractions that plague our everyday lives. As Rayasam reminds us, “our days are filled with continual interruptions. Email, texts, meetings, needy colleagues—and the list goes on.” And she also
reminds us that “a growing number of researchers say that trying to juggle multiple tasks makes you less productive.” In fact, many researchers say that multitasking is a myth, because we can only focus on one thing at a time—a fact that magicians depend on when they are dazzling (and distracting) us with their illusions. One of my favorite books published this year, Cal Newport’s DEEP WORK: RULES FOR FOCUSED SUCCESS IN A DISTRACTED WORLD, addresses the myth of multitasking and offers practical solutions to dealing with scattered brain syndrome (although he doesn’t use this term). Greater Good Science Center director Dr. Christine Carter believes that we have developed a belief that “Busyness is a sign of importance,” which is probably a vestige from the early days of industrialization when the time clock became a symbol of productivity. She believes that “technology is actually rewiring our brains to be addicted to interruption, as we anxiously wait for the next ping signaling a new email, text or social media post.” Devora Zack, author of SINGLETASKING, concludes that “We suffer as a society from scattered brain syndrome. It’s everywhere—throughout our work lives and personal lives.” Rayasam’s article offers four supposedly simple solutions to making our brains a little less scattered. First, “create an environment that promotes focus,” and one that offers us at least a temporary distraction-free oasis, free from notifications and status updates. Second, “avoid meeting mayhem” by leaving our mobile technology behind when we enter the meeting room, using only pen and paper for note-taking. Third, “cluster distracting tasks that drain time,” by scheduling times when we read and answer emails and are available for meetings. And, fourth, “make your availability known,” by discouraging (in a nice way, of course) impromptu meetings and chit-chat. Of course, since we live in the “real world,” following through with this four-step plan will prove to be pretty daunting. But we should at least try to reduce the approximately eleven million bits of information our brains process, or try to process, every second (a little tidbit I picked up from reading Tim Wu’s thought-provoking new book THE ATTENTION MERCHANTS). And what is our holiday take-away from all this? Quite simply, it is my wish that for the next two weeks you will try as best you can to communicate with your loved ones and acquaintances in person and in a distraction-minimized environment. Yes, put away your phones and other mobile devices at your Christmas get-togethers and avoid texts, tweets, and status updates. Rediscover what it’s like to directly connect, in an unmediated way, with that person standing, sitting, or reclining next to you. I realize this may increase your FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) anxieties, but stop and think what you’re missing by ignoring the people in the room. So, I hope you and yours will have a very meaningful and memorable Christmas, unfilled with distractions and multitasking. That could be your greatest gift of all. See you next week with my very personal list of the best books of 2016.
theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
Have Yourself A Merry Little (Telephobia and Scattered Brain Syndrome-Free)
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theloaferonline.com | December 20, 2016
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