The Loafer January 30th by The Loafer

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

on the cover

Volume 32 • Issue #9 Publisher Luci Tate

Beating

Editor Graphic Arts Director Don Sprinkle

Advertising Patti Barr Paul Kavanaugh Janie Jarvis Carolyn Kestner Office Coordinator Amanda Lane

Contributing Staff Jim Kelly Andy Ross Ken Silvers Mark Marquette Brian Bishop Daniel Worley Jason Worley Langley Shazor Jon Lester Distribution Jerry Hanger Teresa Hanger Published by Pulse Publishing, LLC., P.O. Box 3238, Johnson City, TN 37602 Phone: 423/283-4324 FAX - 423/283-4369 www.theloaferonline.com info@theloaferonline.com e-mail: editorial@theloaferonline.com adcopy@theloaferonline.com All advertisements are accepted and published by the publisher upon the representation that the agency and/ or advertiser is authorized to publish the entire contents and subject matter thereof. The agency and/or advertiser will indemnify and save the publisher harmless from any lossof expense resulting from claims or suits based upon contents of any advertisement, including claims or suits for defamation, libel, right of privacy, plagiarism, and copyright infringement.

Founder: Bill Williams Let’s Get Social!

columns & reviews

Social Media Manager Jon Lester

13 Batteries Not Included Young Mr. Lincoln 16 Stargazer Bold Space Journeys 17 Skies This Week 18 Mister Cabin Fever Furtitude 19 Pop Life Lady Bird 20 Appalachian Wanderers Parkways and Byways 21 Focus on Firearms Basic Firearm Safety Rules 23 The Casual Word Definitive 24 Puzzle Page 27 Kelly’s Place Voice Assistance In The Winter Garden

your week’s line-up

Cabin Fever

Cover Design Bill May

4 6 7 7 8 9 9 11 12 14 22 22 25 26

Beat Cabin Fever Super Bowl Sunday is Upon Us JCSO Fundraising Event Asylum Suite Returns to HRBC Mayhem Poets @ Culp Auditorium Grand Ole Uproar @ Country Club Bar & Grill Simple Elegance Bridal Show Groundhog Day After Contra Dance PUSH! Film Festival Accepting Submissions Spotlight Continental Euphony Paramount Partners Pets Of The Week Things To Do

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Don’tSurrender

BEAT Cabin Fever By Paul Kavanaugh

know, I know, it sounds like a chant at a basketball game, but this time of year it is darn real for many folks in our beautiful region. Earlier this week, I got an email from my friend Dave Wade who runs our golf group. He exclaimed that he has cabin fever really bad and was picking out days where it might hit 50 so he could get himself and our group out of the house to play a round. He hit that nail right on the head. Get up and get out! Go do something! It seems like it takes an enormous amount of effort to get decided and get going, but I guarantee that you’ll feel much better after you do. Maybe try something different, experiment a little. There are, of course, many music venues around the Tri Cities, and that is always fun, but new and different might be just what the doctor ordered. There is a great spot in downtown Bristol, Kiln Time, where you can create your own ceramic masterpiece at a very reasonable cost. Take a few friends and let your inner artist come out. Same holds true for Brixey Artist Studios in Kingsport; they do pottery and stained glass there for individuals and groups. Another idea in this vein is Cindy Saadeh Fine Art, also in Kingsport. They have oil painting classes on Monday evenings. And no, I prefer NOT to be your model! When is the last time you went bowling? I like to bowl but never seem to find the time; I just need to make the time. Warpath Bowling Alley is a great spot to go spend a couple hours, as are any of the fine establishments around the Tri Cities.

If something challenging is more your cup of tea, a good suggestion would be Perplexodus Escapes; this is one of those spots where your group gets an hour to interpret clues and solve the dilemma and make your escape. I have not been yet but am planning on it; sounds like a lot of fun. How about a whole different direction? Check out Bays Mountain Park; there is always a lot to do there. I especially love a planetarium – it is easier to find the stuff Mark Marquette is talking about in every issue of The Loafer from a warm, comfortable chair than outdoors, at least in the winter. There are many nice pool halls around the area as well, and that is always fun to do. The two I am most familiar with are Corner Pocket Billiards and Borderline Billiards. These are both in Bristol but there are certainly others you can find. You CAN do outdoors stuff too, just dress appropriately. Paintball at The Alternative Sport is always a hoot as is an airsoft event at GSF Airsoft in Piney Flats. Or maybe go for a moderate length hike on the Tweetsie Trail – the exercise will do you good! If it is a Friday night, head over to Tri Liquor in Piney Flats for the free tastings from 4:00 – 7:00. I hit this friendly spot almost every week (whodathought!). Bottom line is, whatever you do, DO something. Beat Cabin Fever! Beat Cabin Fever!

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Super Bowl Sunday is Upon Us How is our fearless prognosticator doing so far? By Paul Kavanaugh

ot too bad, but not great either! That’s the short answer. I needed the miracle Minnesota touchdown at the end of that game to go 3 for 4 in the divisional round. The Eagles certainly surprised me, and most everyone outside of Philadelphia too! Not only did they keep me from a perfect weekend but kicked me down to 1 for 2 in the conference championship round. Good for them! New England is in the big game again, something like 3 of the last 4 years. Jacksonville gave them a heck of a fight though, and they can be proud of their season – especially considering where that franchise has been the last decade.

So here we are, Super Bowl LII (that’s 52 for you non-Latin scholars). The mighty Patriots against the upstart Eagles. They’re not really upstarts, they had the best record in the NFC, but people think they are actually upstarts because they lost Carson Wentz, their MVP candidate quarterback, with a couple games left in the season. But the oft-maligned Nick Foles rose to the occasion and has his team on the verge of history. These Eagles are a very solid team from top to bottom; the defense is really good, special teams play well and the offense has all the tools they need. Foles will be the key, but if he can keep his composure, they have a real shot here. Of course, on the other side of the field is what is as close to a real dynasty as we have seen in many a year. The Tom Brady/Bill Belichick era is NOT over, don’t kid yourself. Who knows what happens after this game, but my guess is that they just keep going for another couple years. But enough about that. They are the clear favorites in this year’s big contest. The offense is darn good, the defense has gotten better game by game and their special teams always play consistent. The difference maker, as it has been for over a decade, is Tom Brady. The guy just has that magic, the ability to rise to any occasion. That comeback in last year’s game was probably the best of all time. And he is the best of all time. Those arguments have been won! So now we come down to my pick. My friend Colin at Broad Street on State tells me his Eagles are going to do it this year. I tend to think he might be right and was set to make them my pick. But then I saw the cover of this week’s Sports Illustrated. Nick Foles is on the cover. For any of you who are superstitious, that cover is considered the kiss of death – and it is quite rare to find a sports fan who is not at least somewhat superstitious. The other consideration is that I learned a long time ago not to bet against Brady. He doesn’t always win, but he is not playing the Giants this year. So, I say it is New England in a very close game, maybe 31-28. Hand me the chips and a cold one, I am ready for some football!

ASYLUM SUITE

RETURNS TO HOLSTON RIVER BREWING CO. Sucker Punch also part of the action this weekend By Paul Kavanaugh

One of the most popular local bands, Asylum Suite has been wowing Tri Cities audiences for some time now. They are a powerhouse of musicians who combine a blistering guitar driven rock attack with a skillful blend of four-part harmonies to achieve an ear-friendly sound that has made them one of the hottest groups around. The band consist of lead vocalist Buddy Capps. Bassist Mark Spivey, guitarist Terry McCoy and drummer Mark White. Asylum suite is a rock band who has original music along with doing covers for Journey, Queen, AC/DC, Bon Jovi, Loverboy, Kiss, Boston, Van Halen, Guns n Roses, etc. They have such a great sound, I love to hear them whenever I get a chance. See for yourself Friday night at the Brewery – they take the stage at 8:30. Saturday night at 10:00 sees Sucker Punch, a local party band that plays a wide variety of hit songs, take the main stage. With a combined 14 years of experience in local bands, singer/guitarist Dan Woelkers, bassist Steven Fiducioso, and drummer Hutch, work hard to create an eclectic repertoire...spanning not only decades, but genres, their style ranges from acoustic to aggressive, including Hard Rock versions of Rihanna's "Umbrella" OR Adele's "Rolling in the Deep". Sounds like a great show to me. Stop by the Brewery, enjoy a delicious brew and be prepared to be entertained.

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Master Classics III: Immortal Beloved

JCSO Fundraising Event

n February 7, Gourmet and Company will hold 7 a fundraising event benefiting the Johnson City Symphony Orchestra. Twenty percent of all proceeds from that day from the restaurant, bar, and retail store will be donated to the Symphony. “Bring Your Love” for a Valentine lunch or dinner, and listen to the sounds of JCSO musicians while dining. Reservations are advised, and can be made by calling 423929-9007. Gourmet and Company is located at 214 E. Mountcastle Dr. in Johnson City. Hours of operation are from 10 am to 9 pm. Please join the Johnson City Symphony Orchestra on February 10 at 7:30 pm as we share the stage with the award winning ETSU Opera Theatre who will be performing selections from various operas of Mozart and Symphony No. 7 by Beethoven. Karen Smith is in her eleventh year of directing the group. Although comprised of only undergraduate students, the theatre group produces fulllength operas. Their recent mainstage productions have included The Magic Flute, The Elixir of Love, The Bartered Bride and Gianni Schicchi. Annually the Opera Theatre also produces various oneact operas, opera scenes, and as part of outreach to the community, children’s operas such as Chicken Little in 2016 at the International Storytelling Center. This concert will be the third in the Master Classics series and is entitled Immortal Beloved. The concert will be held at Milligan College, Seeger Chapel, in Elizabethton. Tickets are $15 for students, $35 for seniors, and $40 for adults. Visit www.jcsymphony.com or call 423-926-8742 for more details or to purchase tickets.

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Speaking Volumes

Mayhem Poets spread word with mash-up of spoken word, stand-up comedy, hip-hop, theater

n evening with The Mayhem Poets has been described as “The Simpsons meets Malcolm X at a Notorious B.I.G. concert” and “a rap show meets off-Broadway meets underground theater.” Yet, while “their spoken-word performances derive from hip-hop, their material wouldn't make your grandmother blush, and there's nothing gangsta about their pose,” says The New York Times. “(Their message is to write, not fight.)” In fact, The Mayhem Poets, three former Rutgers classmates, are on a peaceful but fullon quest to "emancipate and empower the light within ... and illuminate forever," says ensemble member Mikumari Caiyhe. They will shed some light at East Tennessee State University on Tuesday, Feb. 6, at 7:30 p.m. in Culp Auditorium. The Mayhem Poets seek to make poetry relevant to contemporary daily lives and events and encourage others to communicate creatively. Their subjects cover the gamut – selfexpression, environment, food fights, diversity, stereotypes, bullying and war, as well as pop culture icons such as Oprah and the Kardashians. All topics are presented in “a rapidfire rap often enhanced by a violin or beat box or both,” says the Billings Gazette. While in college at Rutgers University, Raven, along with an earlier Mayhem Poet Kyle Sutton, actually started a weekly open mic event they called Verbal Mayhem – that continues at the school to this day as the Verbal Mayhem Poetry Collective. When Raven, Granger, (who came to the open mic) and Sutton graduated, they decided to take poetry on the road, deriving their name from the 1999 Fight Club film. “Their only weapon is words, specifically the snappy, streetwise art known as slam poetry,” writes a New York Times reviewer. “And they deploy it brilliantly.” Nowadays, The Mayhem Poets perform about 200 shows a year, taking summers to create and keep their material fresh. “Poetry is a viable profession,” Raven tells the Gazette. “We’re not raising kids yet, but we’re making enough to pay rent in New York City.” The mission to inspire more slam poets blossomed further when in 2006, the trio won first place and a $100,000 grant in the Microsoft Idea Wins Challenge to establish poetry cafés. They opened Slam Chops, an open mic venue in New York’s Bowery district, but New York school system budget cuts took a toll on the café/teaching tool’s longevity. So that novices and enthusiasts can locate verbal mayhem anywhere they travel on the continent, Granger even created a phone app called Slamfind that is a directory to poetry slams all over North America. For more information on the Verbal Mayhem Poetry Collective, visit @verbalmayhem #verbalmayhem. For information on The Mayhem Poets, visit www.mayhempoets.com. For tickets for this performance or more information on Mary B. Martin School of the Arts, visit www.etsu.edu/martin, @artsatetsu or call 423-439-8587. This performance may include adult language.

Simple Elegance Bridal Show

Soon-to-be-married couples and their guests are invited to the Simple Elegance Bridal Show hosted by Simple Elegance Tennessee Photography on February 18 from 12:30 to 3:00 at the Jonesborough Visitors Center in Jonesborough.

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Simple Elegance Bridal Show on Facebook and Instagram for more info about exhibitors, gifts, and prizes. Tickets for the Simple Mathew Wooten co-owner of Simple Elegance Tennessee. Elegance Bridal Show are t the show, brides will be able to finalize plans $6.00 at the door or guests can pre-register online for their special day all in one place or just at simpleelegancebridalshow.com to save $2.00 per gather ideas. Many Tri-Cities preferred wedding person and double their chances to win the grand prize. vendors will be exhibiting their goods and More information about the show, including the services—venues, bakers, caterers, photographers, DJs, latest list of participating vendors, is online at and more. simpleelegancebridalshow.com or you can call During the Simple Elegance Bridal Show, door prizes 423.930.8215. will be given to attendees. Every soon-to-be-married The Simple Elegance Bridal Show is connecting couples couple will receive a giveaway tote that contains savings with highly regarded local wedding professionals who and gifts. One lucky bride will win $300 off her wedding are ready help make their wedding dreams come true gown from Southern Belle Bridal. One couple will win while staying within their budget. a wedding cake from Teresa’s Custom Cake. Follow the

As always, we want the bridal show to be informative and fun, so we have activities that brides and grooms-to-be will find different from other bridal shows,"

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Headlines Wonderful Music Weekend at the Country Club Bar & Grill

Greensboro Band Grand Ole Uproar

You might not be real familiar with these guys, and if so, you are in for a treat. The Grand Ole Uproar’s musical gumbo conjures up the Texas twang of Waylon Jennings and Doug Sahm, the electric carnival of Dylan, the improvisational impulses of the Grateful Dead, and the laidback swampy sound of J.J. Cale, as well as many other (and older) songs and artists in the American tradition. That might sound surprising to you until you realize that they credit The Grateful Dead, Bob Dylan, The Rolling Stones, The Band, Doug Sahm, Emmylou Harris, Allen Toussaint, Dr. John, and J.J. Cale as their influences. A tall order to be sure, but they pull it off flawlessly. Stop by the hottest spot on West State Street Friday night for a rockin’, dancin’ good time. Come back for Saturday’s band too! Chasin the Rain, out of Charlotte, is one of the Hottest Up and Coming rocking country bands in the region. Great for heading out to the dance floor, they play new and classic country, adding their own flair to make them a bit of a unique sound that you are sure to enjoy. This show is also at 10:00, but the Country Club invites you to visit earlier and enjoy some great food and an ice-cold beverage. Perfect invitation!

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

ContraDance

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

GROUNDHOG DAY AFTER

he Historic Jonesborough Dance Society will present a Ground Hog “DayAfter” Contra Dance on Saturday February 3, 2018 at the Jonesborough Visitors Center, 117 Boone Street. The band will be Funk N Sway (aka Groundhog Day Orchestra) and the caller will be Laurie Fisher. A class for beginning contra dancer will run from 7:00-7:30pm. The contra dance will go from 7:30-10:30pm with a waltz break at 9:00pm. If you going to be busy on Groundhog Day and won't know whether or not the groundhog saw his shadow? Well okay, you're in luck. Come to the day-after contra dance and find out! To celebrate, there will be food, decorations, fun contests and super fun contra dance! Come join us and your wildest groundhog dreams may come true! Supposedly, if the Pennsylvanian groundhog sees his shadow, North America can expect six more weeks of winter. If he doesn't, spring is just around the corner. We will divide the visitors center hall into two zones – one as winter and one as spring. For winter decorations we will use white streamers, snowflakes, and sleighs etc. For spring decorations we will use green streamers, flowers, hula hoops and some other outdoor toys. If you are voting for more winter, you sit on the snowflake side. If you are now ready for spring, then you sit on the hula hoop side.

Don’t forget your Hawaiian shirt to chase the winter blues away and because you might just win something in the Hawaiian Shirt Contest! We’ll also have a Hula Hoop Contest that will draw whoops and hollers from cheering dancers on the sideline. Funk N Sway comes from Asheville. Fiddler Karen Koenig, who is also a long time contra dancer, formed this contra dance band with Jack Burgess, Ann Griffey. They are known to play rocking medleys with tasteful, danceable with combinations of fiddle, guitar, piano, mandolin and banjo. “As a side note, I have to say that Karen Koenig was my first contra dance partner at Merlefest on April 29, 2005. If she hadn’t come over to the sideline and encouraged me to give contra a try, local contra dance as we know if for the past twelve years may not ever come to be” adds event organizer, David Wiley. Come as you are; wear soft flexible shoes for dancing. Come to dance, join the potluck dinner or just to listen. No partner is necessary. All dances are taught. As always, our dances are smoke and alcohol free. Admission to the dance is $7, $5 for student and children. Families with their own children are all admitted for only $15 as a package. All dances are smoke, alcohol and fragrance free! For further information call event organizer, David Wiley, at 423-534-8879 or visit historicjonesboroughdancesociety. org or Historic Jonesborough Dance Society on FACEBOOK.

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

NOWACCEPTING SUBMISSIONS

ark your calendars! PUSH! Film Festival is returning to Historic Downtown Bristol, Virginia and Tennessee for a fourth year! The Festival plans to host a variety of curated movies, workshops and presentations about film, along with screenings of juried films including shorts, features, and films focused on Tennessee and Virginia over the course of a three – day weekend on October 12th – 14th, 2018. PUSH! is now accepting film submissions for the 2018 Festival. The opening date was moved to January 17th as opposed to March, which has traditionally been the time that PUSH! has opened for film submissions. “Opening earlier in the year, allows the Programming committee to go through its process of selecting films and to coordinate with the Festival’s film jurors, but also allows the Marketing and Logistics committees to coordinate their efforts with better ease as the Festival gets closer in October,” said Jessica Barnett, PUSH! Film Festival Programming Chair. “Over the last three years we’ve matured as a Festival. Going into this year, we wanted to look at what we could tweak to make our planning better and easier for the committees and for our filmmakers.” Filmmakers who wish to submit their films to PUSH! Film Festival will need to visit www.pushfilmfest.com for information on film categories, awards, and more. For more information about PUSH! Film Festival, visit www. pushfilmfest.com, or contact Maggie Bishop at 423-573-2201 or maggie@believeinbristol.org.

Festivals

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Send it to The Loafer! info@theloaferonline.com

Concerts

Exhibits

Batteries Not Included

By Andy Ross aross@ theloaferonline.com

braham Lincoln is a towering American figure, his mythos looming large over America’s history. 1939 was also a towering year for American movies. Considered by many to be the greatest year in Hollywood’s history, 1939 saw released in that single year: “Gone With The Wind,” “Ninotchka,” “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington,” and “The Wizard of Oz.” Also released that year was John Ford’s landmark Western “Stagecoach.” A film Ford followed up that same year with “Young Mr. Lincoln.” “Young Mr. Lincoln,” which was recently released for the first time on blu-ray by The Criterion Collection, stars Henry Fonda not as Lincoln the president, but Lincoln the small town lawyer. As the film begins it’s a bit disorienting at first seeing Fonda. Prosthetics were applied to his face to make him have more of Lincoln’s profile—it’s a fantastic job and it takes a while for you to see Fonda in the makeup. That disorienting sensation being seeing the face of Lincoln, but hearing the familiar voice of Fonda coming out. Lincoln takes up defending two men passing through Springfield, Illinois—the men are brothers, and they’re accused of murder. The film is largely fictional, but the murder case is based on an actual 1858 murder trial that Lincoln was involved in. Fonda is fantastic in the film, giving one of the great performances of his career. What I found so interesting about “Young Mr. Lincoln” is the way the film transitions from a historical biopic—with all the usual trappings of showing signs of the President to come in the young man—to very a taught and well-made courtroom drama. This may sound like an odd analogy, and I mean it as the highest of compliments, but as the trial gets closer and closer to its conclusion, it kind of feels like an episode of the great TV legal drama “Perry Mason.” A series that I’m quite a fan of. This added an unanticipated layer of enjoyment to this wonderful movie for me. Quietly imagining in my mind an alternate universe version of “Perry Mason” with Abraham Lincoln instead of Raymond Burr. The cast is rounded out by Alice Brady, Marjorie Weaver,

and Arleen Whelan. Ford’s frequent cinematographer Bert Glennon, gives “Young Mr. Lincoln” a beautiful black and white image that truly shines on Criterion’s blu-ray. I was so taken by the depth and clarity of the picture that I was shocked to learn, in the included booklet, that the transfer wasn’t made from a nitrate negative, but an original 35mm nitrate print, with damaged portions of that print filled in from a 35mm safety stock fine grain. Nitrate being a tortuously volatile film stock that deteriorates to dust and can explode—it has the components of gunpowder in it. Special features in this must-own blu-ray include an audio commentary by film scholar Joseph McBride, A profile of director John Ford’s life and work before World War II, A talk show appearance by Henry Fonda from 1975, audio interviews from the ‘70s with Ford and Fonda, conducted by the director’s grandson Dan Ford. Closing out the extras is a radio dramatization of the film. The booklet included with the film not only lists technical info on the film’s restoration, but also an essay by Geoffrey O’Brien, and an homage to Ford by Sergei Eisenstein. The Criterion Collection has done their usual astonishing job bringing “Young Mr. Lincoln” to blu-ray, it’s a great film, and this new edition of it is simply sparkling. Fonda is fantastic, and even if you don’t think historical dramas are your thing, I think you’d find plenty to enjoy here. Highly recommended. See you next week.

theloaferonline.com | January 23, 2017

YOUNG

Mr. Lincoln

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Spotlight - TUESDAY - January 30-

Open Mic O’Mainnin’s Pub - WEDNESDAY - January 31 -

Logan Kolarick Wild Wing Cafe Open Mic The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room Jason Lloyd & Co. O’Mainnin’s Pub - THURSDAY - February 1 -

- FRIDAY - February 2 -

Chasin The Rain Country Club Bar & Grill

Legion / Krimson Bishop Busted Open / Badmouth Molly The Hideaway

Cruz Contreras The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room

Dan Deel Woodstone Deli

Asylum Suite Holston River Brewing Company

Joey Nevada Quaker Steak & Lube

The Grand Ole Uproar Country Club Bar & Grill

Black Garlic w/ Rhythm & the Roosevelts Bloom Cafe and Listening Room

Rusty Steel & Quarterbounce O’Mainnin’s Pub

Peter Trigiani Wellington’s Restaurant

Hip Gypsy Woodstone Deli - SATURDAY - February 3 -

Field Notes / Reason Define / Raviner Capone’s

Donny and the Dry Heavers Model City Tap House

Tame the Beats / Deep Cut Lightspeed Action The Hideaway

Steel Creek Renaissance Arts Center & Theatre

The Gentleman & Liars Wild Wing Cafe

- FRIDAY - February 2 -

Aaron Jaxon Band Wild Wing Cafe Annabelle’s Curse w/ Sinners & Saints The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room Malcolm Holcombe Capitol Theatre Jake Quillin Band Sleepy Owl Brewery The Oblations & The Bosses Bloom Cafe and Listening Room

- SATURDAY - February 3 -

Jeff Little Trio Down Home

Jimmy Fitch Yee Haw Brewing Company

Redleg Husky Yee Haw Brewing Company

- SATURDAY - February 3 -

Arm The Witness (Acoustic) Bristol VFW Post 6975

James Meadows Wild Wing Cafe

Laura Thurston O’Mainnin’s Pub

If you or your band are playing in the upcoming week and would like to be in The Spotlight, call in advance to (423) 283-4324 or go online to: theloaferonline.com. Due to last minute cancellations or changes, please call the location to confirm.

III Tyme Out at Carter Family Fold

Cameron Tate Model City Tap House Ali Randolph CJ’s Sports Bar

The Worlds Gone Crazy Tour Quaker Steak & Lube 7 Mile Mushroom Bone Fire Smokehouse Borderline Kingsport Eagles Oak Grove String Band Capitol Theatre The Grand Ole Uproar Damascus Brewery Sundown Band Willoughby Ruritan

HIP GYPSY Friday, February 2 Woodstone Deli

The PF Flyers David Thompson’s Produce Boarderline Eagles

Joe Buck Sleepy Owl Brewery

Sucker Punch Holston River Brewing Company

Tennessee Beach Bristol VFW Post 6975 Pocket Change Elizabethton Moose Lodge

U Turn Bears Bar Below 7 O’Mainnin’s Pub

for show time & more details, visit

theloaferonline.com

Chasin The Rain Saturday, February 3 Country Club Bar & Grill

Family Night Karaoke at CJ’s Sports Bar Karaoke w/ Crossroads & Josh Blevins at Dawg House Tavern Karaoke w/ Marques at The Cave Karaoke at Numan’s Karaoke w/Absolute Entertainment at Marx the Spot Karaoke w/Ron Hutchins at Zachary's Steakhouse - Kingsport

WEDNESDAY

Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke at American Legion Karaoke at CJ’s Sports Bar Karaoke w/ DJ Brad & Top Shelf Entertainment at Quaker Steak & Lube Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Smokey Bones - Johnson City Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City

THURSDAY

Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Macado’s - Kingsport Karaoke at CJ’s Sports Bar Karaoke at Numan’s Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at New Beginning’s Karaoke at Jiggy Ray's Pizzaria Karaoke w/Ron Hutchins at Zachary's Steakhouse - Kingsport

FRIDAY

Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke at Sportsman’s Bar & Grill Karaoke w/ Shane Rouse at Bear’s Bar Karaoke at Kingsport Moose Lodge Karaoke w/ Reverb Karaoke at The Cottage Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Moe’s Original BBQ Karaoke w/ DJ Brad & Top Shelf Entertainment at BoBo’s - Damascus, VA Karaoke at Elizabethton VFW Karaoke w/ DJ Marquez & Top Shelf Entertainment at Holiday Inn (Exit 7) - Bristol VA Karaoke at Numan’s

SATURDAY

Karaoke at The Horseshoe Lounge Karaoke at Kingsport Moose Lodg Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Macado’s - Kingsport Karaoke at Numan’s

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Kara ke TUESDAY

BOLD Space Journeys

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Triump Of American Spirit

Stargazer

By Mark Marquette since 1996 stargazermarq@ gmail.com

merica’s spirit is defined by the people of our nation and their ability to push the limits to discover the greatness we can achieve. Witness this week in American space history when another Moon triumph 47 years ago contrasts against the horrible disaster of Space Shuttle Columbia in 2003. Time heals all wounds it seems, but some things are never forgotten. Like the 17 lives lost in NASA’s darkest week of space mishaps. By coincidence, the three space disasters happened over seven days separated by 36 years: Jan. 27, 1967 Apollo 1 capsule fire on rehearsal pad; Jan. 28, 1986, Space Shuttle Challenger launch explosion; and Feb. 1, 2003, Shuttle Columbia reentry destruction over Texas. The Space Shuttle program rose above the ashes to continue manned space exploration and finish construction of the orbiting International Space Station, continuously occupied since 1999. And the three astronauts lost in the Apollo 1 fire led to a safer spacecraft that led to America winning the Moon Race against Cold War foe Russia. There has always been the “return to flight” mission after America’s space disasters. It was Apollo 7 that flew the first three men around the Earth for 10 days, the three astronauts proving the 1,000-plus changes on the Apollo Command Module were perfect. And Shuttle Discovery flew the first mission after Challenger as well as the next mission after Columbia, each mission an important demonstration of NASA’s ability to overcome tragedy and return to flight with major safety improvements. And forty-seven years ago, an American space hero and two astronaut rookies made the third Moon landing, restoring confidence in the Apollo program after the near-death accident of the Apollo 13 moon voyage nine months before. Apollo 14 was commanded by original Mercury Seven astronaut Alan Shepard, who’s space experience was that May 1961, 15-minute, sub-orbital flight as America’s first spaceman. Rookie Stu Roosa was to take care of the mothership Kitty Hawk while Shepard walked on the Moon with rookie Edgar Mitchell. All three astronauts are deceased. Shepard was grounded by an inner ear balance problem after his Mercury flight. He became assistant to original Mercury astronaut Deke Slayton, grounded by a heart murmur, and the chief of astronauts. They chose the crews for Gemini and Apollo. Shepard had his hearing problem surgically fixed and put his crew together for the Apollo 13 third manned mission to the Fra Mauro highlands of the Moon. But needing more training, Shepard switched with Jim Lovell’s original Apollo 14 crew of Ken Mattingly and Fred Haise. And then the drama of the Apollo 13 spacecraft becoming crippled by an oxygen tank explosion on the way to the Moon. The three astronauts—Lovell, Haise and Jack Swigert who replaced Mattingly (exposed to measles)—were lucky to get back alive. The teamwork to conserve spacecraft energy and live in the Lunar Module for 4 days was truly NASA’s finest hour, accurately portrayed in the Hollywood movie “Apollo 13.” The close call coined the phrase “Failure is Not an Option,” and the return to flight after the Apollo 13 was met with public apathy and cries to shut down the always dangerous Moon landing.

NASA was the victim of several unfortunate circumstances after the amazing mission of Apollo 11. That first moon landing on July 20, 1969 fulfilled President John F. Kennedy’s challenge to America to reach the Moon by the end of the decade. Then NASA doubled down on that presidential pledge when Apollo 12 landed Nov. 19, 1969 next to an unmanned Surveyor spacecraft landed in April 1967. But while the world was mesmerized watching the Apollo 11 moonwalkers during 2 hours of live black and white television, the Apollo 12 color camera failed and there was no live video. While carrying the video camera on a tripod the 100-foot distance of the transmission cable, the lens cap fell off and the Sun’s brightness fried the electronics. Instead of seeing the astronauts Pete Conrad and Alan Bean taking off parts of the Surveyor spacecraft, all NASA had was the audio feed to give the three television networks—ABC, CBS and NBC. And it was boring. Then came the Apollo 13 mission accident two days after launch on April 11, 1970. The three astronauts used the Lunar Module as a life raft and simply flung around the Moon to use its gravity to slingshot back to Earth for three days. From April 13 to 17, it was a true life and death drama. The Apollo 13 investigation showed an oxygen tank dropped during installation created an electrical short, exploding on the way to the Moon. Nine months later, Apollo 14 was ready to blast off on Jan. 31, 1971—destination, Fra Mauro. The Moon voyage was uneventful, and with Roosa orbiting the Moon in Kitty Hawk, Shepard and Mitchell landed their moon ship Antares right on target, the most accurate of all six moon landings. With their equipment on a two-wheel rickshaw, Shepard and Mitchell safely deployed the TV camera, the American flag and began their work. It was the first live television from the Moon in one year, nine months, and Americans just weren’t that interested. The Fra Mauro area was deeper in lunar soil than predicted, making walking in it like a four to six-inch snowfall. During two moonwalks lasting four and a half hours each, the astronauts found it physically challenging. And trying to find the rim of Cone Crater to look inside of it proved a challenge in orientation on the Moon, and they abandoned the excursion just 20 feet from the edge. And then there was Edgar Mitchell trying extrasensory perception experiments (ESP) on the Moon—without the knowledge of NASA or commander Shepard. Mitchell returned from the Mon and formed the Noetic Institute to study paranormal activity from ghosts to UFOs. Shepard has his own lunar antics. An avid golfer, he rigged a six-iron to a tool handle and whacked two Titleist golf balls before boarding his moon ship for rendezvous with Kitty Hawk and the trip home. That “return to flight” by Apollo 14 gave NASA the confidence to continue with the more complex missions. Camping on the Moon for three days and using a Lunar Rover to drive up to seven miles each excursion, Apollos 15, 16 and 17 proved man’s ability to explore an alien world. Something a human hasn’t done in 46 years!

hat super, blue, blood-red Moon is this Wednesday when our celestial neighbor slips into Earth’s shadow and the Full Moon turns dark and ruddy. The early morning lunar eclipse is visible in totality only from those living west of the Mississippi River. The East Coast will see the Moon setting in the morning twilight.

Tuesday, January 30 A great photo opportunity as the nearly Moon rises in the twilight against the background of mountains, buildings and bare trees. This “moon illusion” makes the Moon look bigger when it is low and seen next to earthly objects. Yet you can always cover the one-half degree wide Moon with an outstretched pinky finger! Wednesday, January 31 On this 1958 date in space history, America orbited its first spacecraft, Explorer 1. Russia had orbited the first spacecraft in October 1957, Sputnik 1, which had a beeping transmission signal. Explorer 1 had several scientific instruments to record the energized Van Allen belts circling Earth. Thursday, February 1 On this 2003 date in space history, Space Shuttle Columbia was destroyed during reentry over

Texas, just two minutes from completing a 17day science mission. The seven astronauts losing their lives were commander Rick Husband, pilot Willie McCool, Michael Anderson, Kalpana Chawla, David Brown and Laurel Clark, and Israel’s first astronaut Ilan Ramon.

space station with first female pilot Eileen Collins in control with five other astronauts.

Friday, February 2 On this 1966 date in space history, the Soviet Union safely landed the ball-shaped Luna 9 on the Moon. Luna 9 bounced several times, and then activated cameras to show earthlings the first view of an alien landscape.

Sunday, February 4 Even in the moonlight you can see Orion the Hunter with his two dogs and their bright stars in the south. Sirius the brightest star in the sky is in the Big Dog, Canis Major, and above is Procyon in Canis Minor. Don’t ignore the sky to the north, with the “M”-shaped stars of Queen Cassiopeia in the star-rich region of the winter Milky Way. The Big Dipper is nearly hidden as it drags across the north horizon.

Saturday, February 3 Three Space Shuttles were launched on this date: Challenger in 1984 with five astronauts and communications satellites to deploy; Discovery in 1994 with a crew of 6 and Spacehab in the cargo bay; and Discovery again a year later in 1995 in an approach and fly around of the Russian MIR

Monday, February 5 On this 1971 date in space history, Apollo 14 landed on the Moon in place called Fra Mauro. America’s first spaceman, Alan Shepard, deceased, and rookie Edgar Mitchell, deceased, became the fifth and sixth men to walk on the Moon.

17 theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

THIS WEEK

SKIES

Celestial events in the skies for the week of Jan. 30 - Feb. 5, 2018 as compiled for The Loafer by Mark D. Marquette.

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ge! a r u o rC Shea

C A B I N

F E V E R

FURTITUDE

Cabin Fever solidarity slip-ups are something we are all bound to do; from bangs triminjuries, to bowl cuts—we've seen people use actual bowls—you could be the next Epic Fail on Youtube. But don't you fret that fringe! I'm here to provide you with clip tips to save yourself from shear shame.

THE SKINNY ON THINNING HAIR

Mister

By Jon Lester jlester@ theloaferonline.com

HAIR TIPS

FOR HAIR CLIPS No, I'm not passing out groupons for 70% off of a hair accessory necessity, but I am providing you with the most important tip when choosing your next hairstyle (free of charge). My number one recommendation is to google photos of a male celebrity that closely matches the shape of your face. While you might want to look like David Beckham sporting the infamous man bun, you may be more suited to don Don Draper's side part.

THE LOCKDOWN ON THOSE LOCKS Men, society tends to deem us as dirty danes because of how little we probably tend to wash our hair. However, our genetic makeup of negligence is actually contributing to our hair health. Contrary to what your mother or spouse has probably persistantly lectured you on, a daily shampoo is not necessary; in fact, doing so strips away all the natural oils that keep your mane healthy.

Thinning hair is ranked in the top 5 things men fear most. But, it doesn't have to be. If you're a man of many products, you're only weighing down those few strands of hair. Try opting for texturing powder—being lightheaded is a good thing. Thickening up your food intake could thicken up your hair. How high is your protein intake when it comes to your diet? Your hair is comprised of protein fibers, and if your body is protein deficient, your head is as well. Ending off where we began, let's head back to the showerhead. Excessive shampooing is also linked to hair loss. However, don't skip the water entirely; studies show that drinking more water will be beneficial to hair growth.

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

F Pop Life

By Ken Silvers ksilvers@ theloaferonline.com

ilms about teenagers have been a staple in Hollywood for decades. From the classy ("Rebel Without a Cause") to the trashy (Losin' It"), teen films have graced theater screens and have been met with mixed box office and critical results. The latest film in the genre spotlighting a teen lead is "Lady Bird", starring Saoirse Ronan, who has been nominated for an Academy Award as Best Actress for this role. Thus, we are dealing with the classy this time. Oh, and the film has been nominated for Best Picture as well. The story follows Christine "Lady Bird" McPherson (Ronan) and her life as a student at a Catholic high school in the Sacramento, California suburbs. In her home life she is dealing with a strained relationship with her parents, including her mom Marion (Laurie Metcalf), and her adopted brother Miguel (Jordan Rodrigues), with whom she often clashes. In her high school life she is far from popular, but does participate in extracurricular activities such as theater. She also has a faithful best friend, Julie (Beanie Feldstein), who helps Christine navigate her challenging life. Christine has a strong desire to leave California after high school to attend college on the East Coast. Her desire to leave her native state is met with disdain by her mom, who wants her to stay put. As it turns out, Christine's father, Larry (Tracy Letts) is far more inclined to help his daughter reach her dream. As the story progresses, Christine goes through two boyfriends (Lucas Hedges and Timothee Chalamet), a new "best friend" (Odeya Rush), and plenty of teen angst. During the film, Christine's relationship with her mom runs hot and cold, and it isn't until the end of the film that she really learns how to truly appreciate the love her mother has for her. As with any teen movie, the characters have their rebellious moments, but also show even they are sometimes a confused mess, they can be loving and caring. The film eventually leads to Christine's high school graduation and her acceptance to a university. For me personally, after weeks of viewing films loaded with special effects, it was nice to settle in and enjoy a film that is basically effects free, unless you consider a high school musical effects laden.

What can I possibly say about Ronan now that she has been nominated for an Oscar other than she deserved the nod. The actress is so wonderful in her role, it often feels as if one is viewing a documentary. Her supporting cast is right on target, and Laurie Metcalf, so marvelous as Christine's mom, is nominated for Best Supporting actress. The quietly sweet film "Lady Bird" certainly deserves all the accolades received up to this point, including a Golden Globe win for Best Musical or Comedy Motion Picture. If you need a break from explosions, car chases and animated fare at the theater, then I suggest you check out the coming-of-age story "Lady Bird" for a pleasant alternative. Rated R 4 Birds (out of 4)

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Appalachian Wanderers

By Jason & Daniel Worley jdworley@ theloaferonline.com

Parkw ays a nd L ast week we introduced our readers to the wonders of winter hiking. Not only is it exhilarating, but it can help keep off those winter pounds that seem to add up so quickly and also help cure that chronic case of cabin fever. Frozen waterfalls, animal tracks, and new vistas normally hidden by leaves are all highlights of the season. Due to cold temperatures and weather conditions which can change in a matter of minutes, we know there are some who would rather wait until springtime to resume outdoor activities. That doesn’t mean you have to sit at home though! There are hundreds of miles of scenic drives and parkways which wander their way through almost every corner of our Appalachians, from the Blue Ridge to the Smokies. Of course, we can’t help but start off this list with everyone’s favorite. The Blue Ridge Parkway winds along the main crest of the Blue Ridge Mountains for 469 miles, connecting Great Smoky Mountains National Park with Shenandoah National Park in Virginias. The variety of landscapes include farming pastures along the Blue Ridge Plateau, rhododendron balds in the Great Craggy Mountains, and rare spruce-fir forests on the highest peaks of the Great Balsams. There are many miles of trails and multiple parks along the route which protect the very best examples of Appalachian environments. Due to the parkway’s length, driving conditions can vary wildly from place to another. It’s best to check with the park service before leaving to get an updated list of closed segments. Normally, the higher elevations in North Carolina will be closed due to snow an ice. Areas around Cherokee, the Plott Balsams, Great Balsam Mountains, Mount Pisgah, Mount Mitchell, and Grandfather Mountain reach elevations of a mile or more, creating hazardous conditions. Consider driving the parkway’s lower segments, which include the areas around Asheville, and most of the route through Virginia. The National Park Service has a great website with a map which shows segment closures in real time. Check out www.nps. gov/blri. Usually it’s possible to circumvent a closed area by taking a lowelevation detour. While it may seem a hassle, the amazing winter scenery is definitely worth it! East Tennessee’s own Foothills Parkway is another great place to drive in the winter. Currently only twenty-two miles are open of the intended seventy-two-mile route, but that is due to change this year with the opening of a new segment. This will connect Walland with the community of Wears Valley, adding sixteen more miles to the route. Paving of this segment has already begun, with a projected opening date of late 2018. No doubt this will be the best portion of the parkway, as it traverses steep mountainsides via a series of long bridges and even a curving viaduct,

Bywa ys

not similar to the far more famous one on Grandfather Mountain. There is still plenty of opportunities to appreciate the sections that are currently open. The eastern portion climbs English Mountain near I-40 east and provides outstanding view of Cherokee National Forest, as well as the angular peak of Mt. Cammerer. The much-longer western portion winds along the ridge top of Chilhowee Mountain, with outstanding vistas overlooking the Great Tennessee Valley and the Smokies’ far western peaks. A lookout tower at Look Rock is reached via a short hiking trail and is one of our favorite places to take photos in winter. Low hanging clouds often envelop the higher peaks of Chilhowee and English Mountains, leaving a thick layer of rime ice covering the forest when it dissipates in the morning. This is one of the most beautiful sights we have witnessed in the forest. We have covered the Cherohala Skyway before in a previous article, but the drive through Cherokee and Nantahala National Forests is so amazing we couldn’t help but mention it again. It begins in Tellico Plains, TN and climbs along the highest ridges of the Unicoi Mountains to connect with Robbinsville, NC. Dozens of overlooks and trails allow this National Scenic Byway to rival the Blue Ridge Parkway. Just remember that this road is not as highly-visited as the national parks, and therefore prepare in advance in case you hit hazardous conditions. Last year we were enjoying a nice drive along the highest portion when suddenly a snowstorm blew in out of nowhere. White-out conditions made it hard to see, and the snow piled up amazingly fast. Always call the visitor center ahead of time to get the current weather and road conditions at 423-253-8010. There are many other drives in the surrounding area. Waterfall Scenic Byway in North Carolina is ninety-eight miles long and curves its way through the Nantahala National Forest. Numerous waterfalls, including the famous Bridalveil Falls, are visible from U.S. 64. Southwest Virginia’s Crooked Road begins in Rocky Mount and passes through the Grayson Highlands and Bristol on its way to Breaks Interstate Park. Nantahala Scenic Byway sits not too far from the Cherohala Skyway. It passes through the awe-inspiring Nantahala Gorge on its way from Whittier to Marble, NC. The Natchez Trace Parkway is another unit administered by the National Park Service and goes from Nashville to Mississippi along the original path followed by the Natchez Trace.

Basic Firearm Safety Rules I Focus On Firearms

By Lee Sowers info@ sonofagunstore.com

II III IV V

Handle all firearms as if they were loaded. Never forget that a gun has the potential to produce serious injury or death in a single instant of carelessness. Make safe gun handling a habit to be followed always. After you have determined a gun is unloaded, continue to handle it as though it were loaded. Always keep the firearm pointed in a safe direction. In selecting a safe direction, you must also take into consideration that a bullet can ricochet or glance off any object it strikes, and that bullets can penetrate walls, ceilings, floors, and windows. Remember: You should never point a gun (whether loaded or unloaded) at another person or at yourself. Keep your finger out of the gun’s trigger guard and off the trigger until you have aligned the gun’s sights on a safe target and you have made the decision to fire. By keeping your finger completely outside the trigger guard until you are aimed at the target. You guarantee that the shots you fire will go safely in the direction of your intended target. Always be certain that your target and the surrounding area are safe before firing. Remember that a bullet can travel as much as several miles, so you should be certain of what your bullet could strike before you pull the trigger. Never fire at a movement, a noise, a flash of color, or a rustling bush without positively identifying your intended target. Whenever you handle a firearm, the first thing you should do (while keeping it pointed in a safe direction with your finger outside the trigger guard) is to open the action to determine whether or not the firearm is loaded. If you don’t know the proper way to open the action of a particular firearm— don’t handle it. Instead, consult the owner’s manual, your local gun dealer, or a knowledgeable shooter. Do not experiment.

FIREARMS SAFETY DEPENDS ON YOU

rom the time the first colonists landed on American shores, firearms have played an essential role in our survival, both as a nation and as individuals. Today over 70 million Americans own and use firearms, and the Federal Government estimates that firearms are kept in over half the households in this county. With this freedom must come responsibility. As a firearms owner and user, you must take responsibility for safe handling and safe storage of your guns. Firearms safety is up to you!

Thoroughly read the instruction manual supplied with the firearm. Never use any firearm unless you completely understand the operation and safety features.

VII

Before firing, you should routinely make sure your firearm is in working order and that the barrel is clear of dirt and obstructions. Any obstructions that prevent the bullet from moving easily down the barrel can cause pressure to build up in the firearm, resulting in a damaged gun and serious bodily injury to the shooter or those around him.

VIII

Only use ammunition recommended by the firearm manufacturer, and always be certain that the ammunition matches the caliber of your gun. Most modern firearms have their caliber designation stamped into the barrel.

Quality ear and eye protection should always be worn when shooting or observing.

Never use firearms while under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Handling and using firearms requires your full and continuous attention, alertness, and unimpaired judgement.

All firearms should be stored unloaded and secured in a safe storage case, inaccessible to children and untrained adults.

XII

The transportation of firearms is regulated by Federal, State, and local laws. Always transport your firearms in a safe, unloaded condition and in accordance with applicable laws.

These rules are based on the GLOCK “The Basic Rules of Firearm Safety”. Remember-no set of rules can cover all possible situations. The safe and rational use of a firearm depends on common sense and proper training of the user.

21 theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Always THINK safety Rules. THINK before using any firearm.

“

Continental Euphony,” an evening of eclectic harmonies from across the Americas featuring the tuba in combination with a variety of other instruments, will be presented by the East Tennessee State University Department of Music on Friday, Feb. 2, at 7:30 p.m. in the Mathes Hall auditorium. Dr. Stephanie Frye, who teaches tuba and euphonium in the Department of Music, will be joined by fellow faculty members Dr. Esther Park, piano; Dr. Chris Underwood and Brandon Woods, trumpet; Sean Donovan, horn; Dr. Arthur Haecker, trombone; Opal Clark, vocals; and Logan Ball, snare drum. The performance is free and open to the public. For more information, contact the Department of Music at 423-4394276 or music@etsu.edu. For disability accommodations, call the ETSU Office of Disability Services at 423-439-8346.

Discounts available with ticket stub day of performance

Continental Euphony Paramount Partners

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

• Bristol Station Brews & Taproom Half off first pint or flight • Broad Street on State 20% off your check of $6 or more • Stateline Bar & Grille 2 for 1 Appetizers • Studio Brew 1/2 Half off first pint Free Appetizer or dessert w/Entrée Purchase • Machiavelli’s Free order of breadsticks with any entrée • Whiskey Rebellion Half off your appetizer • J Frank Free dessert and immediate parking • The Angry Italian Half Off Toasted Ravioli Discounts valid for any and all performances at The Paramount.

Magnificence Is now quantifiable Not in carats Or clarity Not in brilliance Nor purity But in moments Of intense acceleration

The Casual Word

By Langley Shazor Follow Langley at TheCasualWord

Multiplied By the number of moments And though this heart Beats rapidly Liken to hummingbird wings This speed In your presence Makes all things Come to a complete stop And I float Somewhere between Each millisecond That this heart skips on As stones across still ponds Even time Must acknowledge your grace And pay homage

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

Definitive

theloaferonline.com | Decem ber 5 2017

Answers on page 26

Bella and Rex are 2 and 3 years old Terrier mixes. They are spayed and neutered and up to date on all vaccines. These cuties are deeply bonded and must be adopted together.

We have so many cute cats and kittens! Please come visit them at the Bridge Home!!

he Bridge Home has an ongoing aluminum can collection in front of the shelter at 2061 Hwy 75 in Blountville, TN 37617 and a second aluminum can collection site at Airworks Heating and Cooling, 5633 Memorial Blvd Kingsport. The cans are collected by a volunteer and the money from the aluminum goes towards badly needed food and supplies for the animals. The Bridge Home No Kill Animal Rescue has started a pet food pantry for people that have had financial hardships because of job loss or medical problems and are struggling to feed their pet. They can come by the shelter and get cat or dog food to get through the tough time.

Donations can be sent to The Bridge Home Shelter PO Box 654 Blountville, TN 37617 Every animal in their care is spayed or neutered and fully vaccinated before being adopted. Being a non profit the shelter is funded entirely by membership dues and private donations. They always need volunteers or monetary donations. Other always needed items: pet food, cat litter & cat toys dog treats & dog toys,paper towels, cleaners, office supplies, Purina weight circles. Phone: 423-239-5237 Hours are Mon-Fri 12pm6pm Sat 12pm-3pm and Sun 2pm-4pm. Website is www.bridgehomerescue@ gmail.com or like them on Facebook: www.Facebook.com/bridgehome

25 theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

PETS

OF THE WEEK

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

THINGS TO DO Big Brothers Big Sisters Looking for Community Volunteers Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Tri-Cities (BBBSGTC) is looking for community volunteers to make a difference in a child’s life. Spending approximately 4 hours a month with an at-risk youth can help them improve in school, their behavior and their self-esteem. “Our kids have a need, and we are looking for caring adults to step up and volunteer,” said Kathy Lowdermilk, Regional Director of BBBSGTC. “If you have a few hours a month and the desire to make a difference, we want to talk with you about our program.” Our local Big Brothers Big Sisters office is part of one of the oldest and largest youth mentoring organizations in the United States. It’s a system that has been proven to work and transforms the lives of children who might not otherwise ever get the support they need to grow and successfully meet life’s challenges. Child-volunteer matches are made based on in-depth and comprehensive interviewing with parents, children and potential volunteers. Stringent safeguards are in place to assure that all parties are safe. Volunteer and parent engagement and training also play a big role. Anyone wanting to find out more about Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Tri-Cities should contact the office by calling 423-247-3240, or visiting TennesseeBig.org. •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Blood Drive Marsh Regional Blood Center will conduct public blood drives at the area locations. Visit tinyurl. com/n4aujx9 to find a location near you. In addition to scheduled blood drives, donors are welcome at Marsh Regional’s collection centers: 111 W. Stone Drive,

Suite 300, Kingsport, 2428 Knob Creek Road, Johnson City and 1996 W. State St., Bristol. For more information about scheduling a blood drive at a local business, church, school or community organization, please call 423-408-7500, 423652-0014 or 276-679-4669 or visit marshblood.com. •••••••••••••••••••••••••• The Casual Word Adult Creative Writing Class Join us for a free, fun, engaging, and different look into writing. In this class, we will not focus on structure, form, or rules, but on the freedom of writing. It is the goal of this class to open the mind to its full creative potential by allowing participants to write what they want, how they want to write it. Sessions will be student lead; we will engage in topics and subjects that are of interest to the students. The atmosphere is casual and jovial. This class is designed for all those 18 and up who wish to try their hand at creative writing. Thursdays @ 6:00 p.m. Jones Creativity Center. Bristol Public Library. •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Author Fair Sure Fire Publishing teams up with The Casual Word publishing to host their first annual author fair at the Bristol Public Library, 701 Goode St. on Februrary 10th from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. The Casual Word and Sure Fire will be there to answer any questions for anyone who is interested in writing and/or publishing. Several authors will be at the event for book signings, Q an A's, and round table talks. This event is drop in and all are welcome. There will be drawings through the day for door prizes. Don't Miss it! • 10 a.m.: Question and Answers

with our publishing teams. • 12 p.m.: Author Book Signings. • Door prizes every hour, on the hour: 12 p.m. - 5 p.m. •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Cooking Class Healthy Soups and Stews with Chef Sheridan Nice. Thursday, February 8th, from 6:00—9:00 PM., at The Ron Ramsey Agricultural Center is located at 140 Spurgeon Lane, Blountville, TN 37617. Cost is $35 per person (Space is limited to 24 attendees) Each attendee needs to register separate Register at tinyurl.com/y9n4tp4p. If you have questions about the event please contact: Karen Rowell at karenrowell94@gmail.com or 423-737-0332 •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Family Book Club Families of school age children are invited to the Johnson City Public Library Storytime Room on February 8 at 6:30 p.m. to discuss A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle. This story follows Meg, who with the help of some friends, must journey through space and time to find her long-lost father. Registration is required for this free program and can be completed by calling Youth Services at 434-4458 or by visiting the

Event Calendar at www.jcpl.org. At least one person registered per family must be eight to eighteen years old. Children eight to twelve years old may still register individually as they would for other book clubs. To learn more about this and other upcoming events, like the library’s Facebook page, or follow the library on Twitter or Instagram •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Songwriters at Heartwood On Saturday February 3rd, the Virginia Highlands Songwriters Association will feature 4 of their writers in a delightful afternoon of original music. The event will be held at Heartwood (Off exit 14 in Abingdon) from 1-3 and is free to everyone. These songwriters are part of the group which is open to everyone. The group meets the 1st Thursday of every month at VHCC in Abingdon at 6:30 in the MEC building Room 114 on campus. All interested songwriters are welcome to attend the sessions and enjoy learning from each other. The group members pick two topics per month to write about. All genres of music are welcome and the experience is positive and motivational. For more information contact Mary

Munsey at mmunsey@vhcc.edu •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Cooking Class With the financial support of Eastman Credit Union (ECU), a group of East Tennessee State University (ETSU) business student volunteers, under the guidance of accountancy faculty members Dr. Anthony Masino and Dr. Michelle Freeman, will offer free tax preparation assistance again this year through the Internal Revenue Service Volunteer Income Tax Assistance (VITA) Program. As an approved VITA location, the ETSU group will assist taxpayers who had $55,000 or less in income during tax year 2017. Hours have been extended for the 2017 filing season. Volunteers will be available to offer tax preparation services on the following Saturdays – Feb. 10 and 24, March 10 and 24, and April 7 from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. at Sam Wilson Hall, room 318, on ETSU’s main campus. For more information or to make an appointment, contact Masino at 423-439-4432 or Masino@ etsu.edu or Freeman at 423-4394432 or freemanms@etsu.edu. For disability accommodations, call the ETSU Office of Disability Services at 423-439-8346.

Cryptogram: Of toiling, uncheered and alone, That wins us the prizes worth earning, and leads us to goals we would own. DropQuote: "The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night. "

the soul-searching question about how much they will “use it [the HomePod] as a speaker [because] we currently have a Naim mu-so in the living room, and the HomePod certainly isn’t going to compete with that!” And how to solve that perplexing dilemma? Well, we will simply supplement the “main B&O system” in the “winter garden” with the HomePod. I have also been wondering what I might do to enhance my winter garden also, along with my fall, spring, and summer gardens. Maybe I should get rid of my TV. If all this hoopla isn’t enough, we have to worry about sound quality issues. As you might have already guessed, Lovejoy has that problem whipped. Here’s how: “The real test, however, will be how well Siri works for HomeKit control. If it can reliably hear us across the room, I think it will stay. If it can’t, then it simply isn’t going to justify the space it takes [all three inches of it??], and will see itself replaced by an Echo Dot or two [or three or four?].” I don’t know about you, but I am creeped out about the thought that the HomePod “will see itself” replaced. Does this mean the device has a consciousness and can be selfreflective? Might it also have a soul? And, if so, will this soul be

Voice Assistance Kelly’s Place

By Jim Kelly since 1989 jkelly@ theloaferonline.com

DISCLAIMER: This column is not an endorsement of specific products, services, or manufacturers, and you can ask Siri (and her many relatives) if you don’t believe me.

INTHEWINTER GARDEN

Now back to the column by Ben Lovejoy, which is a primer on how early device adoption brings out the hidden (or the revealed) geek in all of us. And here’s how. First up is a healthy dose of name dropping, as if the invocation of comparative products will somehow lend more believability to the review. After Lovejoy tells us more than once the reasons for his finally considering the purchase of the HomePod, he wants us to know that “I’m sure Apple is right that it offers a better audio than other smart speakers, but that’s not really saying much.” And, why not, you ask? “My view was that it wasn’t going to compete with my Sonos Play 5, let along my more expensive systems, so I was ready to pass.” In that brief couple of sentences, we learn that Lovejoy owns not only a Sonos Play 5 but also several more “expensive systems.” And then there’s this little gem: “I haven’t been able to talk her [his partner] into an Apple Watch, so we’ve so far coped by investing in a bunch of Phillips Hue dimmer switches . . . .But I’ve also been planning to invest in an Amazon Echo Dot for the livingroom, so that she could ask Alexa to switch lights on or off.” Pretentious enough for you yet? Wait, there’s more. About a paragraph down we learn that “there are some HomeKit automation tasks that require a hub. Since we don’t have a TV [?], my plan there was to use an older iPad.” And, in case you’re wondering, when Lovejoy “got the 10.5-inch iPad Pro, [he gave his] 9.7-inch one to Steph, and was planning to requisition her iPad Air 2 as a HomeKit hub.” Maybe if they got a TV, all their problems would be solved. Of course, I am wondering what this gadget-rich couple uses for a TV. One of those iPads perhaps? Connected of course to the ubiquitous HomeKit. While some of us worry about more mundane things like total nuclear destruction from a North Korean missile, the Lovejoy household ponders

compatible with the HomeKit or those Phillips Hue dimmer switches? And will it enhance the ambience out in the winter garden? Lovejoy does leave those options open when he says how well Apple Music has “learned [his] tastes,” making him want to interact “directly with the speaker.” Could it be that the mysterious Steph is a robot like the Alicia Vikander character in “Ex Machina.”? Believe it or not, I haven’t quite scratched the surface of Lovejoy’s obsessions with voice-assisted gadgetry. I am simply running out of space. Maybe this column could use some voice assistance. And, just think, all these mental gymnastics devoted to a device (and devices) that will generally be used to ask about the weather. We are left to contemplate what Lovejoy did before the advent of voice-assisted devices and why he can’t just use his numerous iPads to do all this work for him. We do live in interesting times. I’ve just asked Siri how many words I have left and she quickly told me, “You’re twenty-two words over your limit.” So, with that, I will bid you a fond farewell and hope to see you again next week. I am turning down my Phillips Hue dimmer switches now.

27 theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018

ast week I came across a very interesting, and slightly annoying column in 9TO5Mac by Ben Lovejoy that gives us insights into the mind (or at least one mind) of a voice assistant enthusiast/fanatic. The product in question is the new and much-discussed Apple HomePod that joins the ranks of today’s hottest new gadget category-the stand-alone voice assisted speaker/surveillance device (i.e. think Amazon Echo, Google Home, iLive Alexa, and that new Apple thingie). As the evolution of new products has shown time and time again, what we didn’t know about a year ago now becomes the new must-have device and object of product envy. Although I use voice assistance at least once a day on my phone, I have so far not heeded the siren call for these new little “don’t-mistake-us-foran-air-freshener” devices. I almost brought home one of these Amazon hockey-puck-look-alike devices when it was priced during the Christmas season for just under thirty dollars. Now that this neat little device has reverted back to its fifty-dollar price tag, I am waiting for just the right product that will probably be used very little once it arrives in my living room (or wherever I choose to place it). Maybe our pets (1 dog, 2 cats) would get more use out of something for which I can just as easily on my phone--without the “cute factor,” of course.

theloaferonline.com | January 30, 2018