The Loafer March 22nd

8 12

Johnson City’s Got Talent Auditions YWCA Bristol to host Pickle Ball League

17 23

Lewis Knudsen at Acoustic Coffeehouse Arts Array presents In the Heart of the Sea

2 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

YUM-YUM

“Power Of The Bite”

Volume 30 • Issue #15

happenings

Publisher Luci Tate Editor Graphic Arts Director Don Sprinkle Cover Design Bill May Advertising Dave Carter Terry Patterson Lori Howell Beth Jinks-Ashbrook Patti Barr Contributing Staff Jim Kelly Andy Ross Ken Silvers Mark Marquette Brian McManus Joshua Hicks Brian Bishop Distribution Jerry Hanger Teresa Hanger Published by Pulse Publishing, LLC., P.O. Box 3238, Johnson City, TN 37602 Phone: 423/283-4324 FAX - 423/283-4369 www.theloaferonline.com info@theloaferonline.com e-mail: editorial@theloaferonline.com (editorial) adcopy@theloaferonline.com (advertising) All advertisements are accepted and published by the publisher upon the representation that the agency and/or advertiser

columns & reviews 18

Stargazer - Circling Satellites Make You Dizzy

19

Skies This Week

20

Batteries Not Included - 1930s Dragnet & Twilight Zone Twists

4

“Power Of The Bite”

5

Easter Happenings

6

The Art of Quilting

7

March Heritage Day

8

Pie In the Face

9

Auditions for “The Music Man”

10

Applications for Busker Fest

11

Kingsport Mets 2016 Schedule

12

State Line Classic Line-Up Announced

13

Music On The Square Fundraiser Tunes-Up

14 Whitetop Mountain Band at Carter Fold 15 The Crooked Road Venue Showcase 27 Things To Do 31

Classifieds

8 ‘PUSH’ Physical Theatre

21 Trivial Traveler - The Cone Zone 22

Mountain Movers - The Derick Sherfey Interview

23

Screen Scenes - Risen

27

Lock, Stock & Barrel - We Don’t Need More Guns

29

Pets of the Week

30

Kelly’s Place - Drums In Our Pants

is authorized to publish the entire contents and subject matter thereof.

The agency and/or advertiser will indemnify and save the publisher harmless from any loss of expense resulting from claims or suits based upon contents of any advertisement, including claims or suits for defamation, libel, right of privacy, plagiarism, and copyright infringement.

Founder: Bill Williams

AMYTHYST KIAH

at Bone Fire Smokehouse Thursday, Mar. 24th & Sleepy Owl Brewery Saturday, Mar. 26th

music & fun 16

Spotlight - Great Music & Fun Times

28

Puzzle Page

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 3

YUM-YUM

brings the “Power of the Bite”

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back to Nelson Fine Art Center

he 3rd annual “YUM-YUM, The Power of the Bite” featuring International Tapas is scheduled for Thursday, March 24 from 6-8 pm at Nelson Fine Art Center, 324 East Main Street, in downtown Johnson City, TN. This fund raising event highlights local restaurants that offer good food through culinary arts while embracing another type of art form - a bicycle-inspired public work of art. 11 businesses participating with two glasses of wine to be included. Businesses this year include: The Millenium Center, Main Street Catering, Jonesborough, The Main Street Pizza Company, The Fresh Market, Krazy Krepe, Noli, Freiberg’s German Restaurant, Baklava by Wanda Buda, Homesteep Tea, Brew Plum Coffee Bar and One Stop Wines and Liquors.There are 200 tickets for purchase. Tickets purchased in advance are $20 and $25 during the week of the event.

The proceeds for this event will go towards a bicycle-inspired public work of art designated for Veteran’s Park - in front of South Side Elementary School in the ‘heart’ of The Tree Streets Neighborhood. $7,500 out of the $10,000 artist fee has been raised.

Tax deductible sponsorships are available. Sponsors of $1,000 will have their name and/or business displayed somewhere near the final piece.

Also showcased during this year’s YUM-YUM, is a new art program called “FREE RANGE ART” - a K-12 art program where children produce work for display and sale. The proceeds of the sale of their project will directly benefit their art programs. This year the children will be producing a work of art using a bicycle wheel with their work on display for a month at Nelson Fine Art Center. “This program is geared for children to be introduced to the gallery system,” concluded Buda.

For more information, visit artlandia.org or email vbudadesigns@ gmail.com. Thanks to the sponsors of this event: Nelson Fine Art Center, Main Street Catering in Jonesborough, One Stop Wines and Liquors and Artransforms

4 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

easter

upcoming easter happenings FLASHLIGHT EASTER EGG SCRAMBLE

Thursday, March 24th 8pm-11pm Memorial Park Community Center 510 Bert St. Johnson City TN The grassy area at Memorial Park Community Center will be turned into an Easter Egg hunting paradise on March 24. The 3rd Annual Easter Egg Scramble is a free event but the fun is never ending. Open to youth ages 2-12. A separate hunt will take place for ages 5 and under. Participants are asked to bring their own flashlights. The Easter Bunny will be on hand for photo opportunities. Call 434-5749 for more information.

MUNSEY EASTER EGG HUNT

Saturday, March 26th 10:30am – 12pm Founders Park – 74 Wilson Ave. Johnson City TN Join us for an Easter Egg Hunt at Founders Park, hosted by Munsey Memorial United Methodist Church. There will be games, crafts, and treats for all ages!

Bring your whole family for a day of fun and fellowship! Please invite your friends too. A little rain won’t keep us away! We will relocate to Munsey Church if necessary.

EASTER EGG HUNT IN THE PARK

March 26th 2pm Natural Tunnel State Park 1420 Natural Tunnel Pkwy. Duffield VA ye Cove Community Church in conjunction with Natural Tunnel State Park - NTSP will sponsor their 8th Annual Easter Egg Hunt in the Park on EASTER EGG HUNT March 26th at 2:00 P.M. Rye Cove ComSaturday,, March 26th 11am munity Church women and Three Bells Boones Creek Elementray School United Methodist Church women will be Pro348 Boones Creek Christian Church, Gray, TN. viding Lunch. We Will Have Five Age Groups as Boone Trail will have our Easter Egg Hunt on Satfollows: Toddling/Walking – 2yrs (the child must be urday March 26th @ 11am @ Boones Creek Elementary able to walk and pick up eggs on their own), 3 & 4 yrs., 5, School. There will be lots of eggs, candy, prizes and inflatables!

6 & 7 yrs., 8, 9, & 10 yrs., and 11-17 yrs. We have Thousands of We hope you will join us!!

Eggs and Loads and Loads of Prizes. Every age group will have 1- $20, 1- $10, 1-$5 and lots and lots of $1’s and more. Come out EASTER PET PHOTOS and join us for a day of fun, fellowship, and lunch. Please arrive Saturday, March 26th 2:30-4:30pm at least 15 minutes before the Egg Hunt begins.

Northirdge Veternary Clinic 3RD ANNUAL BLESSING OF THE BIKES 3125 Bristol Hwy, Johnson City TN For a $10 donation you will receive a digital copy of the two best Saturday, March 26th 9am • Smith Brothers Harley Davidson photos of your pet! All proceeds will benefit the Humane Soci- Smith Brothers Harley-Davidson is proud to announce that for ety of Washington County. All dogs must be on a leash and all the third year in a row, we will be hosting the ‘Blessing of the cats in a carrier. Additional parking is available across the street. Bikes’ for the Fountain of Life Bible Church. For more details, call FLBC Cash/Cards only!

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 5

arts

The Art of Quilting

Exhibit at Jonesborough Visitors Center

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Till the end of March, the Old Town Emporium and the Historic Jonesborough Visitors Center will be hosting the Art of Quilting exhibit. The display features a total of 13 quilts, showcasing a beautiful mix of historic patterns as well as machine and handmade designs.

Our exhibitor this month, Angela Harris of Fellowship Quilters, has been quilting since 1998. Angela originally took a quilting class from a local quilter to fill up some free time, she had no idea how much she would enjoy the class.

“I particularly love creating the quilt tops by choosing and arranging the colors and designs,” Harris said. “I continue quilting education by taking classes yearly that are offered through local quilt shops, quilt guilds and area events similar to QuiltFest that takes place in Jonesborough each July.”

Harris belongs to two local guilds including the Old Town Quilters of Jonesborough and Appalachian Heritage Quilters of Gray. She also teaches classes and has worked with the Herald & Tribune Newspaper on a series of articles on quilt design history.

In 2009, Harris created a cooperative for local quilters, Fellowship Quilters. The business offers a variety of quilting services, including hand quilters, machine quilters and embroiders.

“Fellowship Quilters will also coordinate quilting services and work with local artists to complete projects, additions, repairs and more for clients,” Harris said.

The Art of Quilting exhibit at the Visitors Center is best described by Harris as a sampling of quilting as both a physical and visual form of art.

“Five artists who have worked for Fellowship Quilters have pieces in the display. Two of the pieces in the exhibit showcase of the some oldest known quilt designs to date. They are called Cathedral Windows and Yo-Yo Wreath,” Harris said.

The exhibit also includes a completely handmade 1930s Reels and Tulips quilt, which serves as the jewel of the collection.

“We also have Jordan’s Quilt, which is a memory quilt made by Jordan’s grandmother. Those types of quilts have become very popular in recent years,” Harris said. “Memory quilts are a way to preserve memories of our children as they grow up, or memories of a loved one who has passed away.”

A local favorite pattern known as the Double Wedding Ring is also included in the Art of Quilting exhibit. In this piece, quilter Betty Briscall illustrates how an old handmade design can now be created completely by machine.

“The exhibit also showcases how beautiful and intricate modern quilting designs can be, such as the Summer at the Beach and Modern Amish pieces. Historically quilts were to be used for bedcovers and other functional purposes. However, the work involved in their creation as well as the decorative purpose quilts serve has led to their cultural importance in many places and times, increasingly treated as a visual art form,” Harris said.

The Art of Quilting will be on display until March 31 and is free and open to the public for viewing during the Visitors Center business hours of Monday through Friday from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday from10 a.m. to 5 p.m. and Sunday from 12:30 to 5 p.m.

Currently you can find a few samples from Fellowship Quilters at One40Four located on Main Street in Jonesborough or on their website at www.fellowshipquilterstn.com. You can reach Angela Harris at423-677-5990 or by email at fellowshipquilters@yahoo.com.

6 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

festival

events

Carter Railroad Museum March Heritage Day features steam engines

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n Saturday, March 26, East Tennessee State University’s George L. Carter Railroad Museum will offer the sights and sounds of steam locomotives in miniature form at its monthly Heritage Day with the 6th annual “Steam UP!” exhibition.

Steam trains of all sorts will be displayed and operated on the large 1:87 HO scale layout, which includes a 21-stall steam-era roundhouse. Other steam engine models will run on the G scale logging and HOn3-scale East Tennessee & Western North Carolina narrow gauge steam railroad exhibits.

From the earliest days of railroading until the 1930s, steam locomotives reigned supreme. Sometimes referred to as an “iron horse” due to its innate striding motion and “breathing” sounds, some examples could top 100 miles per hour or pull a mile of freight cars.

By World War II, development of the internal combustion diesel platform began to cause changes in railroading. Steam engines required frequent service and were maintained by an army of skilled labor.

“Steam railroading will always have a special place for train enthusiast young and old; people still find them fascinating, says Geoff Stunkard, the coordinator of the museum’s Heritage Days program. “The Carter Museum’s ‘Steam UP! Day’ gives visitors an idea of how that equipment was used, its evolution and its eventual end.

Most people who have seen one of the few examples still running never forget it.”

As always, children will have a chance to play with models of popular toy steam engines like Thomas the Tank Train in the children’s activity room.

Members of the George L. Carter Chapter of the National Railway Historical Society and the Mountain Empire Model Railroaders (MEMRR) club will coordinate the exhibits. Visit www. memrr.org to learn more about MEMRR, which helps demonstrate and maintain the model layouts, museum exhibits and other projects.

The Carter Railroad Museum is open every Saturday from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Admission is free, but donations are welcomed. The museum can be identified by a flashing railroad crossing signal at the back entrance to the Campus Center Building. Visitors should enter ETSU’s campus from State of Franklin Road onto Jack Vest Drive and continue east to 176 Ross Drive, adjacent to the flashing RR crossing sign.

To learn more about the museum, visit http://johnsonsdepot.com/glcarter/cartermuseum.

For more information about Heritage Day, contact Alsop at 423-439-6838 or alsopf@etsu.edu.

For disability accommodations, call the ETSU Office of Disability Services at 423-439-8346. theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 7

events

ETSU Bucky’s Food Pantry offers a pie in the face for food donations

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lpha Sigma Iota, a fraternal organization for students in the Radio/TV/Film program at East Tennessee State University, will hold a food drive to benefit the Bucky’s Food Pantry—with the help of a few good pies.

For the next four weeks, food donations will be accepted. Each week will honor a respected member of the ETSU campus community and each food item contributed during that week will count as one point for that person. When all the points are tallied, the two individuals with the most food donated during their week will receive a pie in the face during a ceremony on Wednesday, April 20, in the Amphitheater.

Participants include:

ETSU President Dr. Brian Noland, March 21-25 Biological Sciences lecturer Cerrone Foster, March 28-April 1 Psychology faculty member Dr. Chris Dula, April 4-8 Head men’s basketball coach Steven Forbes, April 11-15

The community is invited to “vote” by bringing food donations to campus. Visit http:// www.etsu.edu/foodpantry/default.aspx to find drop off sites and the most needed food items.

Bucky’s Food Pantry aids ETSU students, staff and faculty who find themselves in need of assistance.

For more information, contact Morgan Lockhart at lockhartmb@goldmail.etsu.edu.

Johnson City’s

Got Talent auditions

Carver Recreation Center, 322 W. Watauga Avenue, will be this year’s location for auditions on March 28, 29, 30, and 31 from 5-7 p.m. to compete in this year’s Johnson City’s Got Talent competition, to be held Saturday, April 23, 6:30 p.m. Participants, ages 4 and older, are required to bring music, equipment and application to auditions. Entrants can obtain applications from Carver Recreation Center (10 am – 5 pm) or Memorial Park Community Center (7 am – 9 pm Monday thru Friday or 9 am – 5 pm on Saturday). Applications can be turned in to Carver prior to scheduled audition and will be accepted the evening of audition.

Make-up days for auditions will be April 5 and 7 from 5-7 pm. at Carver Recreation Center. Anyone interested in sponsoring or for more information call (423) 283-5820 or (423) 461-8830.

8 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

theatre

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Theatre Bristol Announces Auditions for Roles available for men, women and children in “The Music Man” this Broadway classic!

heatre Bristol announces March and April audition dates and details for the June production of the Broadway favorite “The Music Man” at the Paramount Center for the Arts. Veteran and novice actors are invited to audition March 26 and April 2, 3, and 4 at Theatre Bristol, 512 State Street, Bristol, TN. Roles for men, women, and children are available, as well as opportunities with the production crew.

This all-American musical classic and winner of an Oscar for Best Music features Professor Harold Hill, con man and fast-talking salesman. He convinces the people of River City, Iowa, “Ya Got Trouble” and sells them on a young people’s band and “Seventy-Six Trombones.”

Marian the Librarian’s “Till There Was You” causes him to grow fond of her and the children. It’s a score of favorites: “Goodnight, My Someone,” “It’s You,” “Goodnight Ladies,” “Pickalittle,” “Gary, Indiana,” “Wells Fargo Wagon,” and many more close harmonies and memorable melodies.

Taking the story from the composer’s own life, Meredith Wilson once played in the John Philip Sousa band before The Music Man became a multi-Tony Award winner including Best Musical winner and Grammy award winner for multiple songs. His “Till There Was You” became a hit for the Beatles in 1964 and would be the only song from a Broadway musical they ever recorded.

Directing The Music Man will be highly respected and talented actor/director, Theatre Bristol veteran Glenn Patterson (Les Misérables, Scrooge! The Musical, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, Miracle on 34th Street).

The audition will consist of singing, reading, and dancing. No preparation is necessary but prepared material will be welcome. For important details on preparation and auditions for children and adults, please visit www.theatrebristol.org/audition.

Doors will open 30 minutes before first audition. All auditions are at Theatre Bristol, 512 State Street, 2nd floor rehearsal hall.

The audition schedule is:

Saturday, March 26: 6:30 Children and 7:30 Adults Saturday, April 2: 9:30 Children and 10:30 Adults Sunday, April 3: 2:00 Children and 3:00 Adults Monday, April 4: 6:30 Children and 7:30 Adults Anyone interested in being a part of the production crew may contact Theatre Bristol at info@theatrebristol.org.

The Music Man is presented through special arrangement with and all authorized performance materials are supplied by MTI, www.mti.com.

Founded in 1965, Theatre Bristol is the oldest continually running children’s theatre in northeast Tennessee and now celebrating its 51st season. Its Main Stage season consists of up to five productions. Performances take place in the ARTspace, a multipurpose, black box theatre which seats up to 120 and the Paramount Center for the Arts. Theatre Bristol is entirely volunteer run and we invite you to get involved.

For more information, visit the Theatre Bristol’s website or Facebook page, contact Theatre Bristol at 423-212-3625, or email info@theatrebristol.org.

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 9

ARTIST APPLICATIONS ARE OPEN

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festival

FOR ABINGDON’S 2ND ANNUAL BUSKER FEST

erformers of all types are invited to apply to be a part of the 2nd Annual Main Street Busker Fest, in Abingdon, VA Saturday September 3, 2016. Held each Labor Day weekend, Busker Fest fills the sidewalks of downtown Abingdon with weird, wonderful performing artists. The festival is presented by Abingdon Main Street and the Abingdon Music Experience.

The organizers are calling for performers of all stripes to participate in the festival, whether or not they have busking experience. Accepted artists will receive a fee for their work, as well as tips from festival goers.

“Busking” is an age-old tradition in which artists play publicly for tips, performing on street corners or wherever a crowd gathers.

The 2015 festival featured musicians, acrobats, magicians, stilt walkers, fire breathers, living statues and more.

Vaudeville troupe Jalopy Junction at the 2015 Main Street Busker Fest Photo by Jason Whamsley

The Festival will take place Saturday September 3rd, 11:00am to 5:00pm on Main Street in downtown Abingdon, followed by Buskers After Dark, an evening event for adults. Busker Fest is family friendly, with special kid-oriented activities from 11:00am to 3:00pm; Buskers After Dark is a 21+ event.

Main Street Busker Fest is a fundraiser for Abingdon Main Street, a non-profit organization affiliated with the National Main Street program. Co-presenter Abingdon Music Experience is supported by the Town of Abingdon and the Abingdon Convention & Visitors Bureau.

To apply artists should visit http://www.mainstreetbuskerfest.com and submit a description of their act and a link to a video. Applications will be accepted through June 6, 2016.

For more information, visit www.mainstreetbuskerfest.com or contact Event Coordinator Sara Saavedra at (276) 676-2282 or ssaavedra@abingdon-va.gov.

10 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

sports

KINGSPORT METS

RELEASE 2016 SCHEDULE

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he Kingsport Mets have released their schedule for the 2016 Appalachian League season.

The Mets play 68 regular season games, including 34 at home from June through September. The Mets open up at home against the Elizabethton Twins on Thursday, June 23rd with a six game home stand that includes three games against the Twins and three games against the Pulaski Yankees.

The season concludes with a season-long nine game home stand, August 24th through September 1st. The home stand includes three games against the Princeton Rays, Danville Braves and the Bristol Pirates.

Game times will remain the same as last season, with Monday through Saturday home games beginning at 7:00pm and Sunday home games starting at 4:00pm.

For the second year in a row, the Kingsport Mets will host a “Camp Day” on Tuesday, June 28th.

Camp Day, which will start at 11am, is a scheduled day game designed to allow local camps to bring out their kids to a game as well as giving fans the opportunity to experience a day game at Hunter Wright Stadium.

In conjunction with the City of Kingsport’s FunFest activities, The KMets will host their annual “FunFest Night at the Ballpark” on Friday, July 15th.

The ballgame starts at 7pm and gates open at 6pm. The game will be followed by a postgame fireworks show.

All general admission tickets for the FunFest game are $3.

In 2015, the KMets won the West Division with a 40-28 overall record, including a 20-13 record at home.

They lost in the first round of the playoffs to the Greeneville Astrosm, 2 games to 1.

The Mets have won the West Division and made the playoffs two of the last three seasons.

During the off-season, the New York Mets reached a contract extension with the Kingsport Convention and Visitors Bureau and the City of Kingsport that will keep the minor league Mets in Kingsport for the next five years.The agreement extends a long-running commitment shown between the City of Kingsport, the KCVB and the Mets. The KMets have had a Player Development Contract with New York since 1980, making them the eighth-longest affiliated team in minor league baseball.

For more information on the 2016 Kingsport Mets season, season tickets and/or partnership opportunities please contact the Kingsport Mets office at (423) 224-2626, email at info@kmets.com or log on to www.kmets.com.

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 11

sports

20th Annual State Line Classic

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Line-up announced

he City of Bristol Tennessee Parks and Recreation announced the line-up for the 20th Annual State Line Classic Softball Tournament.

The event is scheduled for Wednesday, April 6, 2016, with a rain out date of Wednesday, April 13. This tournament is hosted each year by the Parks and Recreation department to showcase local high Field A Eastside High School vs. Tennessee High School school softball talent. The tournament matches up Tennessee softball Field B Holston High School vs. Sullivan Central High School teams against Virginia softball teams.

Field C Virginia High School vs. Sullivan East High School On the day of the State Line Classic, the opening ceremony will begin at Field D John S. Battle High School vs. Elizabethton High School 4:00pm. The first double header game will begin at 4:30pm on all four fields. The final games of the night will begin at 6:30pm.

Creek Park multi-sports complex. Whitetop Creek Park is located directly behind The tournament games are held at the City of Bristol Tennessee’s Whiteop the Bristol Motor Speedway on Highway 394 on Sportsway Drive. The gate fee for the night’s entertainment is $3.00 per adult and $1.00 per student or child over 5 years of age. Concessions will be available.

“The multi-sports complex hosts softball and baseball tournaments from March through October of each year bringing over 100,000 people to the Bristol area,” said Sandra Cole, Recreation Programmer. “It also hosts numerous adult softball Field A Eastside High School vs. Elizabethton High School leagues including church, men’s, women’s and co-ed teams throughout the year.

Field B Holston High School vs. Sullivan East High School We invite everyone to come out and see how Fastpitch Softball is played in the Field C Virginia High School vs. Tennessee High School great states of Tennessee and Virginia.”

Field D John S. Battle High School vs. Sullivan Central High School For more information contact Sandra Cole at 423-764-4023 or email scole@ bristoltn.org.

6:30pm Games

4:30pm Games

Adult Pickle Ball League open to all skill levels YWCA Bristol will host an adult Pickle Ball League beginning March 31. The league is open to all skill levels and will meet every Thursday from 7-9 PM in the YWCA gym at 106 State St. in Bristol, TN. All equipment will be provided and you must register by March 28 to participate.

Cost for the 5 week league is $15. For more information contact Patti at YWCA Bristol 423-968-9444 or ywca@ ywcabristol.org.

YWCA Bristol is on a mission to eliminate racism, empower women, stand up for social justice, help families and strengthen our community. Go to www.ywcbristol. org and www.ywca.org.

12 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

music

Jonesborough Music on the Square Fundraiser Tunes-Up April 1

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ne of Jonesborough’s most popular events is gearing up for its annual fundraiser in anticipation of the 2016 Music on the Square season, an event series featuring live performances by local and regional bands, storytellers, poets and performance artists. The sixth annual Music On the Square Spring Tune-Up is set for April 1, from 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. at the International Storytelling Center.

“This fundraising event assists with the seasonal Music on the Square series held in Historic Downtown Jonesborough every Friday night, May through September,” Music on the Square Organizer Steve Cook said. “Because of the support from donors and sponsors, as well as funds raised during the Spring Tune-Up, the series is offered free and open to the public.”

The Spring Tune-Up includes foods from area restaurants, beverages from local distributors, entertainment by area musicians and the widely anticipated silent auction event that takes place throughout the evening on April 1.

“The silent auction has proved to be a huge success in funding for past Music on the Square seasons,” Cook said. “People really get in to it and there are so many items up for bid to choose from.”

The focus for items in the silent auction will include a few original works from regional artisans. Featured items also include a hot air balloon excursion, a one-night stay at Jonesborough’s Storybrook Farm Bed & Breakfast and a stress less chair from Mauk’s of Jonesborough.

Other items in the auction include various gift certificates to local businesses, artisan creations and tickets to area attractions and events, as well as an overnight package at the Carnegie Hotel, photography sessions and more.

“Music on the square really is a regional effort. We get so much support from individuals and businesses for the Spring Tune-Up and during the Music on the Square season,” Cook said. “The series is now in its eighteenth year with the Spring Tune-Up fundraiser taking place for six years now.”

It has become a tradition for all ages to grab a chair and head to downtown Jonesborough every Friday evening during the summer months for Music on the Square.

“The crowds have increased with every year it seems, and so has interest from bands wanting to be a part of Music on the Square from Tennessee and surrounding states, Cook said.” I search for Americana style music, old favorites and even new faces to the music scene in the area when selecting artists to perform for the series. Every now and then I’ll come across a great jazz group, storyteller or performer that also makes a nice fit for Jonesborough too.”

Tickets for the Music on the Square Spring Tune-Up on Friday, April 1 are $20 in advance and $25 at the door on the night of the event. They can be purchased at the Jonesborough Visitors Center by calling 423-7531010, or online at jonesboroughtn.org. Tickets can also be purchased at the Jonesborough Art Glass Gallery by calling 423-753-5401.

For additional information about the Spring Tune-Up or Historic Jonesborough’s Music on the Square event series that runs May through September, contact jboart@comcast.net or visit Music on the Square on Facebook. theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 13

music

carter family fold presents

WHITETOP MOUNTAIN BAND

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aturday, March 26th, 2016, at 7:30 p.m., the Carter Family Fold in Hiltons, Virginia, will present a concert of old time music by the Whitetop Mountain Band.

Admission to the concert is $10 for adults, $1 for children 6 to 11, under age 6 free. Whitetop Mountain Band is a family-based band from the highest mountains of Virginia. Whitetop is an area rich in old time music tradition, and this band has deep roots in mountain music. The band’s members have worked tirelessly to preserve the region’s style of old time fiddling and banjo picking and are legendary musicians and teachers of the style. Their shows are high energy and unlike any other show you have ever seen.

There’s everything from fiddle and banjo instrumentals to powerful solos and harmony vocals on blues, classic country, honky tonk, traditional bluegrass numbers, old timey ballads, originals, four-part mountain gospel songs – and some flat foot dancing. Wellknown for their charisma on stage and their ability to engage audiences of all ages, this group has been performing at the Carter Fold since shows first began at the A.P. Carter Grocery in the 1970s.

The Whitetop Mountain Band is one of the most popular dance bands of the Appalachian Mountains. They have a great following at square dances all over Virginia, North Carolina, Tennessee, and Kentucky at venues like the Carter Fold. The group has performed throughout the U.S. at festivals, concerts, competitions, and colleges.

The Smithsonian Folklike Festival, National Folklife Festival, World Music Institute in New York City, the Carter Family Festival, the Dock Boggs Festival, the World’s Fair, the Virginia Arts Festival, Floydfest, Ola Belle Reed Festival, and Merlefest are a few of the many festivals that have featured the band. The group has toured in England, Wales, Ireland, and Australia. They have taught at workshops and classes all over the U.S. like the Swannanoa Gathering, Cowan Creek Music School, Big Stone Gap’s Mountain Music School, and the Mt. Rogers Combined School. They were featured on a NCTA music tour of the east and west coasts in 2010. Arhoolie, the Virginia Foundation of the Humanities, JuneAppal, Heritage, and Rounder Records are a few of the labels they have recorded for. In addition, they have been featured in many magazines, TV shows, and radio programs. Whitetop Mountain Band was recently given the “Entertainer of the Year” award in the old time category at the ACMA’s Blueridge Acoustic Uprising.

The band originated with Albert Hash in the 1940s.

Albert was a well-known and beloved fiddler and luthier. As a teenager, Albert played with Henry Whitter of Grayson & Whitter. Grayson & Whitter recorded in the 1920s. The tune “Hangman’s Reel” that Albert recorded is the same version played by so many old time musicians today. He taught Wayne Henderson, Audrey Ham,

14 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

and many others to build instruments.

In the 1970s, Albert’s brother-in-law, Thornton Spencer, and his wife Emily joined Albert in the Whitetop Mountain Band. The three also started an old time music program at Mt. Rogers School, a small K-12 public school in Whitetop. The students learn fiddle, banjo, guitar, bass, and dancing. Emily Spencer has carried on the program, and it has received a lot of regional and national attention for its’ uniqueness – including Grammy and CMT nominations.

The Whitetop Mountain Band is still carried on today by Thornton Spencer on fiddle and Emily Spencer on banjo and vocals. Their daughter, Martha Spencer plays with the band as well. She is a multi-instrumentalist (guitar, banjo, fiddle, and bass) and fine vocalist and dancer. Jackson Cunningham plays mandolin, guitar, clawhammer banjo, and harmonica; and he does vocals for the group. Jackson is originally from Oregon, and he’s played music since early childhood. He has performed with duet and trio groups and recorded on the VFH label. Debbie Bramer moved from Michigan to Fancy Gap, Virginia. She plays bass in the band and dances. Debbie has been part of several clogging teams and has been active in many dance workshops and competitions. Ersel Fletcher plays guitar and adds his vocal talent to the group.

The fast-paced mountain music of the Whitetop Mountain Band of Grayson County is definitely a family affair. Be sure to check out the Spencers and their family band at the Fold. Lots of people play old time music, but no one plays it with as much fierce intensity – or absolute fun – as the Whitetop Mountain Band! For additional information on the group, go to http://whitetopmountainband. com/.

Recorded information on shows coming up at the Fold, call 276-386-6054.

music

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The Crooked Road Venue Showcase at Heartwood

he Crooked Road celebrates the traditional music of the communities of Southwest Virginia. Many of those communities have regular gatherings of musicians for jam sessions or concerts and each gathering is different from the next. These regional gatherings are presented at Heartwood in Abingdon, Virginia, by The Crooked Road as part of their Venue Showcase series.

The next Venue Showcase will be at 6:30 pm on Thursday, March 24th and will feature two jams that are affiliate venues of The Crooked Road: Willis Gap Community Center Jam and Lambsburg Community Center Jam. “As part of this music series, we have arranged for these amazing gatherings to literally pick up and come do their thing at Heartwood”, says Jack Hinshelwood executive director of The Crooked Road. “The idea is to introduce these Jams to new audiences at Heartwood and give the audience members a taste of what they can experience if they go see these Jams in their home location.”

“As sometimes happens, these jams grow from modest beginnings,” says Jack. “This one started back around 1995 when friends of Nellie and Otto Hiatt would gather for music in their home. To accommodate all of the folks that wanted to hear and play the music, it was moved to the Willis Gap Community Center but it still retains that ‘welcome to our home’ atmosphere.” The Willis Gap Community Center Jam is held every Friday night from 7-10

pm in Ararat, Virginia, just minutes from Andy Griffith’s hometown in Mount Airy, NC (Mayberry) and just minutes from the Blue Ridge Parkway. Willis Gap Community Center Jam was featured in the October 2011 issue of Smithsonian Magazine which noted that “some of the older musicians had been born into a world straight out of a country song, where horses still plowed steep hillsides, and mothers scalded dandelion greens for dinner.” Otto Hiatt serves as emcee for the Jam which is open to all comers. Visitors are treated to old time, bluegrass, gospel, and early country favorites.

Known as the happening place for Southern Carroll County and located at the foot of the awesome Sugarloaf Mountain, The Lambsburg Community Center provides a place for people to enjoy life through a variety of activities. One of those activities is the LCC Jam. The Lambsburg Community Center Jam was organized in September of 2007 and has been running every Friday night since. Each jam session includes old time and bluegrass musicians from all over to make the Center a great venue for good clean fun and relaxation every Friday night beginning at 7 pm. “This jam and the community center are wonderful assets for the Lambsburg area,” says Jack Hinshelwood. “This is one of those places where even on your first visit you feel a part of the community because people go out of their way to make you welcome.”

For more information on The Crooked Road Music Series call (276) 492-2409 or email: info@thecrookedroad.org.

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 15

S O LG T P

T I

- TUESDAY - Mar. 22nd -

- FRIDAY - Mar. 18th -

JULIAN LAGE & CHRIS ELDRIDGE

PROMISE THE WORLD

THE MUDBUGS

DOUBLESHOTT

at Down Home

(R & B, Soul, New Orleans, Swing) at Acoustic Coffeehouse

DOWNTOWN COUNTRY at Jiggy Ray’s 6:30pm

- WEDNESDAY - Mar. 23rd -

OPEN MIC at Jiggy Ray’s TINDERBOX CIRCUS SIDESHOW at The Hideaway 8pm

LEWIS KNUDSEN MUSIC HUSTLE SOULS at Acoustic Coffeehouse - THURSDAY - Mar. 24th -

ACOUSTIC SINGER SONGWRITER NIGHT at Capone’s AMYTHYST KIAH at Bone Fire Smokehouse

CORBIN HAYSLETT at Down Home BROTHER MOSES at Sleepy Owl Brewery 8pm

WAYLAND w/ SEASONS OF ME & THE LAUREN NICOLE BAND at Holston River Brewing Company 7:30pm

RUSTY STEEL unplugged at O’Mainnin’s Pub

GRANT MALOY SMITH THE MATCHSELLERS at Acoustic Coffeehouse

- FRIDAY - Mar. 25th -

CROCODILE SMILE at 50Fifty Sports Tavern

JV SQUAD at Capone’s BAND OF RUHKS at Down Home

H

OPEN JAM at The Family Barn 1pm PEA PICKIN’ HEARTS

at Country Club Bar & Grill

AIRSHOW at Acoustic Coffeehouse

THE COMET CONDUCTORS & THE GET RIGHT BAND

at The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room 8pm

BEFORE THE STORM at O’Mainnin’s Pub

SOUTHERN COUNTRYMEN BAND (Country) at The Family Barn

DADA CABARET TRAILER TRASH BELLE OF THE FALL at Acoustic Coffeehouse

BELOW 7

at Houston Valley Club, Greeneville, TN

- SATURDAY - Mar. 26th -

SUNDOWN BAND (Country)

at The Family Barn

BILLY CRAWFORD BAND

at Holston River Brewing Company 9pm

JACK DAW’S 7 at Jiggy Ray’s 7pm EARTH SUITS, NEW CONSPIRATORS, & JESSE LEWIS of Motel Rodeo at Capone’s MARK MULCH at Shelbee’s Vintage Cafe

DIRTY SOUL REVIVAL at 50/fifty Sports Tavern

THE BROTHER BOYS at Down Home

SHOOTER (Country, Classic Rock, Oldies) at Elizabethton Moose Lodge 9pm

NIGHTSHIFT (Country, Southern Rock, Oldies) at David Thompson’s Produce 7pm

at Quaker Steak & Lube 8pm

at Lion’s Club 7pm

AMYTHYST KIAH

at Bone Fire Smokehouse

THE CHARLES WALKER BAND

NIGHTSHIFT (Country, Southern Rock, Oldies) GRAND OLE UPROAR ADAM MCMILLIAN at Jiggy Ray’s 7pm

CAPTAIN IVORY

at Sleepy Owl Brewery 9pm

THE FREEWAY REVIVAL

at Holston River Brewing Company 9pm

16 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

- SUNDAY - Mar. 27h -

at The Hideaway

EXIT 23 at Bristol Brewing WHITETOP MOUNTAIN BAND

SHOOTER (Country, Classic Rock, Oldies)

If you or your band are playing in the upcoming week and would like to be in The Spotlight, call in advance to (423) 282-1907 or go online to: theloaferonline.com. Due to last minute cancellations or changes, please call the location to confirm.

at Carter Fold

at Sleepy Owl Brewery 8pm at O’Mainnin’s Pub

JANA SALTZ at Bone Fire Smokehouse DOUBLESHOTT at Country Club Bar & Grill KELLY HOPPENJANS BRIEF AWAKENING at Acoustic Coffeehouse

at Bone Fire Smokehouse

- MONDAY - Mar. 28th -

ETSU at Bristol’s Pickin’ Porch OPEN MIC at Acoustic Coffeehouse BLUEGRASS JAM at Hardee’s (Boones Creek)

KARAOKE TUESDAY Karaoke at 50Fifty Sports Tavern Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City TN *********************** WEDNESDAY Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke at American Legion 8pm Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Smokey Bones - Johnson City TN Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN *********************** THURSDAY Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City Karaoke at Bristol VFW Karaoke at Holiday Inn - Johnson City Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Everette’s Bar & Grille - Johnson City *********************** FRIDAY Karaoke at Bristol VFW - Bristol TN Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke at Sportsman’s Bar & Grill 9pm Karaoke w/ Reverb Karaoke at The Cottage 8:30 pm Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN Karaoke at Bristol VFW Karaoke at Elizabethton VFW Elizabethton TN Karaoke w/ DJ Marques at Holiday Inn (Exit 7) - Bristol VA Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City *********************** SATURDAY Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment At Macado’s - Kingsport Karaoke at Bristol VFW Karaoke At Numan’s - Johnson City TN *********************** SUNDAY Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment At Everette’s Bar & Grille - Johnson City TN

Spotlight Directory 50 Fifty Sports Tavern 2102 N. Roan Street Johnson City Acoustic Coffeehouse 415 W Walnut St. Johnson City 423/434.9872 Applebee’s 2771 E Andrew Johnson Hwy Greeneville 423/ 636-1483 Bone Fire Smokehouse at the Hardware 260 W Main St Abingdon Va 276/623-0037 Bristol Brewery 41 Piedmont Ave Bristol VA 276/ 608-1220 Bristol’s Pickin’ Porch 620 State St Bristol 423/573-2262 Capone’s 227 E Main St Johnson City 423/928-2295 Carter Family Fold 3449 A. P. Carter Hwy Hiltons VA 276/594-0676 Country Club Bar & Grill 3080 W State St Bristol 423/844-0400 David Thompson’s Produce 251 Highway 107 Jonesborough 423/913-8123 Down Home 300 W. Main St. Johnson City 423/929-9822 Elizabethton Moose Lodge 288 Lovers Lane Elizabethton 423/542-5454 Family Barn

15559 Lee Hwy Bristol VA The Hideaway 235 E. Main St Johnson City 423/ 926-3896 Holiday Inn (Exit 7) 3005 Linden Dr Bristol Va 276/466-4100 Holston River Brewing Company 2621 Volunteer Pkwy Bristol TN Jiggy Ray’s 610 E. Elk Ave Elizabethton O’Mainnin’s Pub 712 State St Bristol 423/844-0049 The Outdoorsman 4535 Highway 11W Kingsport Quaker Steak & Lube 629 State St Bristol VA 276/644-9647 Sleepy Owl Brewery 151 E. Main St. Kingsport 423/390-8476 Washington County Moose 15605 Porterfield Hwy Abgindon VA 276/628-2756 Wellington’s Restaurant Carnegie Hotel 1216 W State of Franklin Rd Johnson City 423/979-6400 The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room 216 E Main St Johnson City Woodstone Deli 3500 Fort Henry Dr Kingsport 423/245-5424

LEWIS KNUDSEN @ Acoustic Coffeehouse Wednesday, March 23rd

At 17, Lewis sold his entire basketball card collection, bought recording equipment, and started writing and recording original music. Before moving into his college dorm, an adviser told him there would be no room for recording equipment in the dorm room. Lewis put his bed frame up on wood blocks, kept the gear on the surface of the frame, moved the mattress under the bed, and slept under the songs he was writing. For the past 15 years, songwriting has been much more than a hobby, it has been a language, a personal therapy, and a full time occupation. Knudsen’s 2015 release, “The Way of Most Resistance” reflects inspirations from the genres of funk and soul while still thinking outside the box.

Some of Lewis’ strongest influences are James Taylor, Randy Newman, Martin Sexton and Stevie Wonder.

In the Fall of 2013 Lewis toured in Europe through German promotion company Songs and Whispers, and is currently booking a 2016 tour which will include South Korea, as well as many cities across the U.S.

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 17

astronomy

CIRCLING SATELLITES MAKE YOU DIZZY

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here are so many and such a variety of satellites orbiting Earth that it makes you dizzy.

Would you believe that there are more than 30,000 objects up there the size of a softball or larger that are tracked by the US government? Well, it’s true, and most of the objects are pieces of busted up or dead satellites.

There are currently 3,700 satellites in orbit, but only 1,100 are active and the rest dead, their missions ended. But dead or alive, satellites orbit Earth for years, decades and some even centuries before gravity pulls them into a fiery reentry. One of America’s first satellites, Vanguard 1, launched in March 1962, is still orbiting!

Most important to our everyday life are the “geosynchronous” satellites that give us our 24/7 dose of television, radio, navigation and government surveillance. These satellites appear stationary over strategic areas of Earth because they match the rotational speed of Earth from their high perch more than 22,000 miles above our surface.

These geosynchronous satellites with names like Sirius, DIRECTV and EchoStar are owned by the communication giants, others are shared with rental fees for dozens of other satellites. These amazing orbiting spacecraft are the key players of our technology revolution— the other players being the ground-based cellular towers now familiar structures among our local landscape. Turn on your car Global Positioning System (GPS) and about a dozen satellites begin locking in on your exact location on the surface of Earth—and you can find the apartment complex where your daughter is waiting you to change her flat tire! (true story!)

The GPS satellites number 24 to a particular orbital plane 1,000-5,000 miles above Earth.

Several orbital systems of these satellite “constellations” create a halo of amazingly accurate signals that we use every day to find people, places and things.

Then there are those “Earth resources” satellites that are so vital in feeding and energizing today’s complex modern world. They are 300-1,000 miles high and zoom over the same areas 17 times a day and night taking in data. Satellites like Landsat and Sentinel monitor the growing fields of America’s wheat, corn and soybean crops; Indonesia’s rice fields; and African forests. Other satellites called Seasat and Meteosat keep close watch on the world’s ocean system, actually following food sources like plankton and guiding fishermen to where the large schools of fish, crab and lobster are located.

18 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

There are orbiting satellites that sniff our atmosphere, take the temperature of our oceans and sample the cosmic radiation hitting us from the Sun and stars.

And where would we be without weather satellites? Since the first groundbreaking Tiros and its images of North America on April 1, 1960, meteorologists have relied on the increasing technology jumps to bring accurate forecasts days in advance and instant warning for severe weather.

And then there are the “reconnaissance” satellites, aka “spy in the sky.” From the first series of Corona satellites that ejected film captured by airplanes dragging nets to the latest live images of the world’s hot spots, America’s Department of Defense has been keeping America safe from hundreds of miles above.

Most American’s don’t realize that the DOD has its own space program, albeit unmanned. While NASA has about $20 billion a year to budget, the Defense Department just as much money—if not more—to carry out secret spy missions with Top Secret spacecraft. The DOD has a two, unmanned minispace shuttles classified as X-37A & B, and each has been in orbit more than 400 days. Recently declassified are some Cold War era spy satellites whose technology was amazing for the 1960s and ’70s.

The Space Shuttle has deployed five DOD satellites on Top Secret trips of three or four days, the actual launch not announced until hours beforehand. But it is obvious by activity at Cape Kennedy what day the launch would be conducted.

Satellites are a vital part of today’s 21st Century world—we could not live without them! And just about any night you can see a few streak across the sky.

Look up in the deep twilight and if you see a light moving that has now blinking lights like an airplane, you just might be seeing a satellite. Of course the International Space Station 225 miles high is easy to see when visible, and so is the Hubble Space telescope. But most moonless nights you can see a dozen or more. Many move steadily from west to east, but many spy satellites go from south to north.

Satellite watching is a whole other area of stargazing as serious followers know details about American, Russian and Chinese military and civilian spacecraft. And it’s also fun to know which satellite your seeing.

Keeping an eye in the sky is real. Just visit Google Earth someday and see your backyard from a space satellite! Mine still has the old car in the driveway…

Celestial events in the skies for the week of Mar. 22nd - 28th as compiled for The Loafer by Mark D. Marquette.

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he last week of March is Easter Week and the first full week of Spring. The Moon will be full phase Wednesday morning, setting the date for Easter Sunday. Both the evening skies, with the dazzling and familiar constellations, and the morning skies with planets Jupiter, Mars and Saturn are enticing us to just look up a few minutes. As appropriate for the Christian celebration, take the time to sit down, look up and loose oneself in the contemplation of the stars…it’ll be time well spent.

Tues. March 22 On this 1982 date in space history, the launch of Columbia took the Space Shuttle on its

third test flight with just two astronauts, this time running some experiments in the cargo bay and many biomedical tests on themselves during eight days in space. In 1996, Shuttle Atlantis blasted off Cape Kennedy on the third link-up with a Shuttle and the Russian MIR space station. They delivered Shannon Lucid, who spent 188 days aboard the space station, an American record that was eclipsed in March 2016 by Scott Kelly (340 days) aboard the International Space Station.

Wed. March 23 Full Moon is today at 8:01 am, referred to as the Pascal Moon. On this 1840 date in astronomy, the first photo of the Moon through a telescope was made by William Draper on a silver platinum photographic plate. Just 176 years later, most of us have a digital camera on our cell phones that will take a great Moon photo through any telescope.

Thurs. March 24 The winter constellations still dominate—Orion, Canis Major, Gemini, Taurus and Auriga among them.

But after 10 pm they begin to set while Jupiter is bright in the east in the hindquar-

ters of Leo the Lion.

Fri. March 25 GOOD FRIDAY. On this astronomy date in 1996, naked eye Comet Hyakutake was closest to Earth, heading back out in the Netherlands of the Solar System after whipping around the Sun. The world was abuzz as Comet Hale-Bopp was an easy naked eye sight in the evening skies.

Sat. March 26 The morning sky is beautiful with Scorpius in the southeast marked by red Mars in its claws and Saturn in its tail. In the middle is red star Antares.

Sun. March 27 Easter Sunday. To the North is the Big Dipper standing on its end, and in the east, the Leo the Lion is high and proud. When looking in this direction we are looking away from our Milky Way Galaxy and into the depth of the Universe. That’s why amateur astronomers enjoy finding the several dozen easy galaxies to find among the thousands of galaxies seen by professional observatories and telescope photography.

Mon. March 28 The sky is changing rapidly, and you can see eight 1st magnitude stars before they set in the west beginning at 10 pm DST. Castor and Pollux in Gemini; below is Procyon in the Little Dog and the brightest star in the sky, Sirius in Canis Major; Rigel and Betelgeuse in Orion; Aldebaran in Taurus; and high above, Capella in Auriga the Charioteer.

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 19

opinion

1930s Dragnet & Twilight Zone Twists Like a lot of classic movie fans, I’m a sucker for the world of short subjects. All the major studios had a short subjects department back in the day, mostly from the 1930s up to the mid 1950s.

Short subjects were either 10-20 minutes long, and would run before the feature film. The most famous entity to come from Short Subjects would be The Three Stooges. With an average under 20 minute running time, studios soon found their back catalog of theatrical shorts were perfect fodder to offer to syndicated television.

There were many varieties to the world of short subjects, ongoing series such as The Stooges and the other most well known group, The Little Rascals (originally known as Our Gang), there were mini musicals, and fact of life type docu-shorts, travelogs in vibrant Technicolor to show a wartime audiences the beauty of far away destinations.

Many short subjects were only known to the most ardent of film buffs, till numerous ones from the MGM and WB library began to appear on Turner Classic Movies to fill gaps of airtime between films.

As a result, many long forgotten short subject series have become known again to legions of film buffs--many of whom have been hoping for years to get their hands on DVD sets of the various series. One series that was a 12 year staple was MGM’s “Crime Does Not Pay,” which ran from 1935-1947. The series recently had its first ever complete release with a six disc DVD collection from Warner Archive that collects all 50 shorts in the series. It’s interesting watching the series waver between the era of the gangster picture, to the era of Film Noir.

The majority of the shorts in the series open with the audience being addressed by “The MGM Crime Reporter” who informs them how happy he is to be able to share another case history with them.

20 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

It’s a bit preposterous to think that a major motion picture studio would have an on staff “crime reporter,” and it’s even more goofy when there’s a run where the actor playing the crime reporter changes in every short. The shorts department at MGM served as a training and testing ground for new talent, both behind the camera and in front. You can see a few future MGM stars show up in the occasional short.

It’s not quite clear if the origin of these shorts was to counteract the glamorizing of gangsters happening in the media of the day or Warner Brothers own bread and butter gangster flicks, but if there’s an overall moral link to each short it’s that if you’re vaguely connected with crime, death is coming. Short Subjects weren’t as regulated as feature films, and the Crime Does Not Pay series often takes dark and morbid turns in the last few minutes. A short with a female convict suddenly tells us “Her true punishment is knowing she’ll never see her child. A child that will never know of her murderer father and convict mother.” Uh, what? Not at any other point in the short was this information revealed.

The dialogue in the films are a hoot, particularly in the earlier entries. The second short in the series has a cop saying--and I’m paraphrasing here as I don’t remember the line exactly--”That’s right, Johnny. You’re gonna get the chair. The hot seat. You’re gonna fry!” Followed by Johnny saying “Not me, copper! I’ll turn state’s evidence!” There is a dip in quality as the war years of WW2 start, and the films turn more towards vague propaganda than gangster action--the crime reporter begins to be phased out of the series as well.

The shorts are really quite entertaining to watch, but I’ll say they’re not for everyone, only those whose love of old Hollywood is deep enough binge watching short subjects is your jam.

I don’t think your teenage children would be down for a night of 1930s gangster action. Unless they are, in which case they must have a Robert Osborne bobble head in their bedroom. But this classic move nut/film preservationist loves that this is a thing you can get. Good looking transfer of crazy shorts that us nutty film lovers just have to have sitting on our shelves so we can learn about milk scams and alibi cons anytime we want. Tis truly a golden age to be a film nut. So many titles to watch, such little time. See you next week.

travel

The Cone Zone

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ho here likes ice cream? Pretty much everyone, is my guess – yours truly included. We each have our own favorite places to find that cold, creamy goodness as well, whether it be a dedicated ice cream parlor, a drive-in fast food joint, or even the Cuisinart in your kitchen. Surely we can all agree that institutional ice cream, like you might find in say, a university cafeteria, is probably going to be sub-standard though, right? Well, to anyone who has spent time on the campus of Penn State University, that notion is pure blasphemy. As far as they are concerned, any discussion on the topic of scrumptious scoops inevitably begins and ends with The

Creamery.

The Pennsylvania State University Creamery, or just The Creamery as it is commonly known, has been part of campus tradition for more than a century, and its reputation is unparalleled in the Keystone State. The story begins with Penn State being designated a land-grant college back in 1862, a status that provided funding for instruction in ‘the agricultural and mechanical arts’ (I actually wrote a book on this topic several years back).

One of the ways the university sought to meet this requirement was to acquire two Holsteins and call it a dairy farm. Students were instructed in the latest agricultural techniques of the sort, and as the program grew, the university began selling surplus dairy products to locals.

The rest is ice cream history. The dairy farm grew over the years to eventually become an integral part of Penn State’s internationally recognized College of Agricultural Sciences. Through The Creamery, the university continues to sell various dairy products to the public – things like milk, cheese, and ice cream

that are natural products of students’ education and training.

It’s a self-sustaining business. Penn State doesn’t even advertise The Creamery or its ice cream, yet it still manages to move 225,000 gallons annually, with 750,000 hand-dipped cones sold each year on site.

It’s such an impressive operation that industry giants such as Haagen-Dazs, Baskin-Robbins, and Good Humor have all sent representatives to enroll in courses to learn the Penn State way of doing things. Even Ben (Cohen) and Jerry (Greenfield) studied there before starting their now world-famous ice cream company.

The Creamery offers more than 150 flavors, cycled through seasonally with maybe 30 or so available at any given time. And boy is it popular.

It’s a mandatory stop for most all campus visitors, famous faces, and common folk alike.

President Bill Clinton had a cone there in 1996. He must’ve liked it too because when he was back visiting PSU again a few years later, he sought out another cone – then took three tubs extra home with him packed in dry ice. And this was after he’d trimmed down.

On any given football Saturday, when the alumni descend on the campus, they’ll eat through 4,500 gallons of Creamery ice cream. Go sometime (maybe when it’s a little quieter) and have a scoop of Apple Cobbler Crunch for me.

It’s cheap, the portions are huge, it supports education, and hey…it’s ice cream! Just watch out for that inevitable brain freeze.

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 21

human interest

The Derick Sherfey Interview

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o matter what your faith, you have to admire passion! That is what this newly found friend of mine absolutely glows with.

Derick Sherfey is a local pastor.

And as the old country preachers used to say, “if his enthusiasm doesn’t get your fire burning, your wood is wet!”

BRIAN: Derick, you and I know each other through mutual acquaintance with my family members who go to your church. So let’s establish some background here. Where did you grow up and how did that shape who you are today?

DERICK: I have lived in the Tri-Cities area my entire life with the exception of a brief relocation to Florida, so this is the only place I have ever called home. I grew up in the Orebank and Bloomingdale neighborhoods of Kingsport, went to college at East Tennessee State University, and I have lived in Johnson City since.

The people, places, and values that make up this culture have deeply shaped how I view the world. I believe any region has aspects of beauty and brokenness and both have been used in my life to develop the convictions that drive me today as a pastor serving this city.

BRIAN: Your passion is obviously in the ministry. Tell us a little about your background and the path you have taken to get you up to now in your chosen profession.

DERICK: I have often jokingly said God calling me to be a pastor is proof of His sense of humor (or maybe better yet

that He delights in using messed up people to show how awesome He is). When I run into old friends and they find out I’m now a pastor some laugh, some just don’t believe me, and some say things I probably shouldn’t repeat here. (ha!) With the exception of my sweet mother and some folks from my Church growing up, no one would have ever pegged me as the pastor

type- including myself.

Toward the end of my time in high school I had a “crisis of faith” and walked away from the Church and, in many ways, ran from God after being raised in a good church by a mother who loves Jesus. After a dark season of rebellion and doubt, God brought me back to himself during my time in college through a campus ministry leader who shared his life with me, and more importantly shared Jesus and the beauty of what He has done.

22 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

The Scriptures came alive to me in ways they had never before and I began to see these things I grew up hearing about are actually true. The more I investigated the claims of Christ, the more I realized that, if it’s true, this must change the purpose and direction of my life.

During this time I began attending Tri-Cities Baptist Church with a beautiful woman who would later become my wife.

It was here that men invested deeply into me showing me what it means to be a man who follows Jesus. I fell in love with the local church and began to have a desire to devote everything I have to local church ministry so others could experience the life change I had, while the pastors I was serving with affirmed my gift and calling to pastoral ministry, even when I was too stubborn to see it. I was pursuing a career in the field of Emergency Medicine, but it was clear God was calling me to be a pastor and began changing the course direction of my life. This landed me pursuing a Communications Study and Sociology degree from ETSU and later seminary at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary.

BRIAN: Along those same lines, the ministry is a profession for a lot of people. Is there a line for you between what earns a living and your passion for the gospel or, is this a case of perfect harmony between the two?

DERICK: The folks at Tri-Cities have been so gracious with their support of us that I am able to serve the church full-time and enables my wife to invest in our son at home full-time because of their generosity. This is a beautiful, weighty thing- for a group of people to identify a calling on your life and to partner together in such a way where I am able to devote myself fully to shepherding them. Serving these people is one of the greatest joys in my life.

Movers ......

Continued on page 25

In Theaters Now

reviews

“RISEN”

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his Easter season there are several films at your local theater fitting for this time of year. One such film is “Risen”, starring Joseph Fiennes (“Shakespeare in Love”) and directed by Kevin Reynolds (“The Count of Monte Cristo”). The film begins by introducing the audience to Clavius (Fiennes), a Roman Centurion, who after seeing the aftermath of the crucifixion of Jesus (Cliff Curtis), and his body’s eventual disappearance from the tomb he was encased in, is assigned by Pontius Pilate (Peter Firth) to find the body, or one resembling the body of Jesus, to present to the public in order to quell a impending uprising in Jerusalem.

Clavius is aided by Lucius (Tom Felton), a young Roman soldier, in his efforts to locate the missing body of Jesus. In the beginning of his search Clavius questions the soldiers who were in front of the tomb at the time of Jesus’ disappearance, and when questioned one gives few details and the other tells of a blinding light and the stone blowing away form the tomb door. Clavius is still not convinced a miracle resurrection occurred, and orders all in the city who claim Jesus has risen from the dead arrested

so he can question them. Even those questioned, including Bartholomew (Joe Manjon), confirm Jesus has indeed risen from the dead. As his search continues, Clavius eventually comes across a meeting where Mary Magdalene (Maria Botto) and the disciples of Jesus are meeting with the risen Messiah. Upon seeing Jesus alive, Clavius falls to the floor in shock and listens to Jesus speak to Mary and the disciples until he disappears again. Eventually the disciples journey to the place where they will see Jesus again, the Sea of Galilee. Upon learning of their journey, Clavius follows the disciples to see if they will actually meet Jesus again. The disciples make Clavius part of group and eventually they all see Jesus again, which eventually leads to an awakening for the Roman. I loved how the film approached the subject of the crucifixion of Jesus from the vantage point of a non-believer, as this take only added to the unique style of the film. The film is never preachy, and expertly presents the message of love and forgivness as presented by Jesus. The performances are all excellent, with Fiennes underplaying his role to great effect. Fiennes could have easily made his character boisterous and over-the-top, but thankfully director Reynolds kept his actor under control. Curtis is also wonderful in the role of Jesus, called Yeshua in the film, as the actor conveys a true sense of warmth and love. “Risen” is a great film to enjoy at Easter with its unique take on the resurrection, and I can think of a few politicians, and some of their followers for that matter, who could certainly benefit from a viewing of this film. (Rated PG-13) A-

IN THEATRES NOW Box Office Top 10

Zootopia (2016) 10 Cloverfield Lane (2016) Deadpool (2016) London Has Fallen (2016) Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (2016) The Perfect Match (2016) The Young Messiah (2016) The Brothers Grimsby (2016) Gods of Egypt (2016) Risen (2016) IMDb.com (03/19/2016)

The Arts Array presents

In the Heart of the Sea

The Arts Array Film Series presented by Virginia Highlands Community College is in its 45th year. All films are presented at the Abingdon Cinemall on Mondays and Tuesdays at 4 p.m. and again at 7:30 pm.

In the Heart of the Sea (March 28 and 29) In the winter of 1820, the New England whaling ship Essex was assaulted by something no one could believe: a whale of mammoth size and will, and an almost human sense of vengeance. The real-life maritime disaster would inspire Herman Melville’s MobyDick. But that told only half the story. “In the Heart of the Sea” reveals the encounter’s harrowing aftermath, as the ship’s surviving crew is pushed to their limits and forced to do the unthinkable to stay alive. Directed by Academyaward winner, Ron Howard.

The Arts Array Film Series is part of the comprehensive cultural outreach program of Virginia Highlands Community College.

The series is co-sponsored by the Abingdon Cinemall, the South-

west Virginia Higher Education Center, Emory& Henry College, and King University. Admission to the films is free for the faculties and students at the supporting institutions. Members of the general community may attend for $7.75.

For a brochure on the series or more information, please contact Tommy Bryant at 276-739-2451 or email him at tbryant@vhcc.edu.

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 23

24 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

Movers ......

Continued from page 22

BRIAN: There are a lot of areas of ministry and a lot of locations you could choose from. What has lead you to this specific campus of Tri Cities Baptist Church? Do you have a specific calling to work around a college atmosphere?

DERICK: After serving in our High School ministry at Tri-Cities for several years, I came on staff in 2011 as College Pastor and a couple years later transitioned to an Elder of our Church and was sent out to plant a multi-site campus of TCBC in South Johnson City where I currently serve as the Lead Teaching Pastor. I greatly love Johnson City and all that is happening here and college ministry through the local church will always be a passion of mine.

College students are a blast to work with- I love the questions they ask, the desire for their lives to count for something bigger than themselves, and just how formative the collegiate years are. I see work with college students as one of the most strategic ways we can raise up leaders and send them out as faithful followers of Christ and to live life on purpose to make Him known- both during their stent at college and also to be sent around the world with the Gospel after they graduate.

All of these reasons are secondary for me, though. What has led me to do what I get to do currently (and I pray what will drive me as long as I have breath) is the supreme worth and beauty of God. I am convinced God deserves worship from every people group of this world. So, my calling is to pour out my life to do everything I can to enjoy Him and to use whatever gifts He has given me as a pastor to see others enjoy Him. My passion is for people to see and experience that ‘Jesus is better’ and to help them connect their lives with God’s purpose to show how good He is in the everyday stuff of life.

BRIAN: It has been fantastic to get to know you a little better! We can’t let this opportunity pass us by to put the word out there about some of the things you have going on in the area right now and how people can find our more. Go. DERICK: I am humbled at all the things God is doing in our area. It’s bigger than just what’s happening at Tri-Cities. We are committed to multiplying disciples, leaders, and churches here in our city and around the world. The most exciting thing for me as a pastor is to see everyday people living out their relationship with Jesus in everyday things: being excellent doctors, teachers, engineers, stay-at-home moms, artists, retirees, students, etc. Real change begins when we see things like dirty dishes, classrooms, grocery stores, ball fields, offices, and neighborhoods through the lens of what God is up to and joining Him in what He is doing.

People are making a difference in various areas of our culture by living on purpose by pursuing racial reconciliation, opening nonprofits, investing holistically in our friends who struggle in lower income lifestyles, making good art, building intentional friendships with people who have completely different beliefs- just to name a few. People are relocating too hard to reach places around the world who have never heard the name of Jesus to use their vocational gifts and passions to love those nations well.

THIS is what I want to give my life for! There a lot of exciting things we have going right now, but they all serve to hold up and fuel this bigger purpose! I’d be happy to chat with anyone interested in this type of lifestyle! Look me up and let’s do coffee sometime! theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 25

area interests

things to do Free ‘Make and Take’ Floral Plaque Workshop Are you interested in creating unusual creative floral designs? Members of the Shady Oaks Garden Club will be presenting a workshop in the Arts and Crafts Room of the Memorial Park Community Center located at 510 Bert Street in Johnson City on April 19th from 3:30-5:30.

The workshop is free and will be limited to the first 20 individuals who register. No prior experience is necessary. To register or for more information, contact the Center at 423-434-5749.

You may also reserve your space by stopping by the center and inquiring at the main desk.

You will be making a floral plaque which is a design of plant material and other components attached to a background panel. All materials will be provided free of charge. You will only need to bring a pair of scissors. The finished plaque will be 8” x 10” and can be hung of the wall or supported on a small easel not provided. Plaques are a fun and inexpensive way to decorate a room in your home and are also a welcome addition in hospital rooms.

You are invited to enter your plaque in the upcoming Shady Oaks Garden Club Flower Show which will be held at the Memorial Park Community Center on May 20-21.

Join us for some fun and creativity.

Jonesborough Community Garden The Town of Jonesborough’s Parks and Recreation Department is offering both new and experienced gardeners a chance to participate in the Jonesborough Community Garden for the 2016 planting season. The garden is located off of Hillrise Drive in Jonesborough and beds are available on a first come, first serve basis. The land is being offered for use to the public through a shared partnership between the Town and local resident, Jim Eldridge.

There are 24, 4’ x 8’ raised beds available for use by the public for a low fee

26 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

of $20/year to cover the cost of water usage. Applications are available by emailing rachelc@jonesboroughtn.org.

In addition to offering residents the opportunity to grow their own vegetables, the community garden is also providing an avenue for residents to grow vegetables for our local food bank, Jonesborough Food Pantry. Any extra produce from gardens will be donated directly to The Jonesborough Food Pantry, which is supported by the Jonesborough Area Ministerial Association.

Funding for the community garden was provided through a grant from the Tennessee Recreation and Parks Association. If you would like to participate by renting a space for the year, or if you’re interested in volunteering, please contact Rachel Conger, 423.791.3869 or rachelc@jonesboroughtn.org.

JCSPS Offers Seamanship Course The Johnson City Sail and Power Squadron announced today the offering of their Seamanship Course. The 9 week course, which will begin March 28 and go through May 23, will take place every Monday evening at Northeast State Community College (room L106) from 6 to 8 pm. This class comes after JCSPS’s successful completion of training 25 students in the Tennessee Safe Boating Course.

This course is designed to provide a foundation of confidence and competence for the safe and enjoyable operation of both sail and power boats. The course will cover boat handling and maneuvering in a variety of conditions and understanding of how boats and boat operators should behave in various situations including close quarters and open water. You will also learn about docking, anchoring, basic navigational rules of the road, emergency procedures, boating equipment and their use as well as other important boating information. Course fees are $100 for non-members, $50 for members and include all class books and materials.

Pre-registration is required. To register or for further information contact John Whitehead at (423) 239-6875 or E-

During this course, Officers from the Department will instruct citizens in several areas including Law, Crime Prevention, Patrol, Investigations, Defensive Tactics, SWAT, Traffic, and Firearms training. The Academy is not designed to make participants certified police officers, nor does it give the graduates authority to act as police officers. The focus of the curriculum is to provide an informative overview of the fundamentals of police operations.

This two-way communication will certainly be an effective and successful way to build a partnership between the community and the police department.

Applications may be found on the city’s website at www.bristoltn.org.

For further information, please Applications being accepted contact Nathan Greene, Community for Citizens’ Police Academy Programs Officer at (423)989-3647or The Bristol Tennessee Police Depart- ngreene@bristoltn.org. ment is accepting applications for the upcoming Citizens’ Police Academy.

Senior Services offering AbThe Citizens’ Police Academy will begin on April 4, 2016 and meet on Mon- solute Beginner Line Dance day evenings from 7:00 p.m. to 10:00 Lessons p.m. through June 13th. All classes will Senior Services at Memorial Park be held at the Slater Community Center located at 325 McDowell St. Bristol, TN. Community Center, 510 Bert St., will The Citizens’ Police Academy is aimed offer Absolute Beginner Line Dance at providing area residents with an in- (Level 1) lessons from 5:30-7 p.m. on side look at the operations and servic- Thursdays, March 31-April 28. Begines of the police department as well as ners of all ages are welcome. Instructor fostering a better working relationship will be Martha Davenport.

Participants are required to pre-regbetween the Department and the public. The program includes classroom ister and pay by March 25 at the Meinstruction, exciting hands-on training morial Park Community Center front desk. Cost is $30 for five weeks. and a graduation ceremony.

For more information, please call The class costs $50.00 and is open to (423)434-6237. interested area residents.

Mail at tricitiesboating@gmail.com The JCSPS, also known as The TriCities Boating Club, is a member of the United States Power Squadron, a nonprofit, educational organization dedicated to making boating safer and more enjoyable by teaching classes both on and off the water that help power and sail boat owners learn many aspects of operating their boat. Squadron members are boating families of all ages who contribute to their communities by promoting safe boating through education and exposing the public to the fun but careful operation of their boats. We welcome all who are interested in boating. www.TriCitiesBoating.org.

DROP QUOTE: “I love freedom for what I can do with it, I hate freedom for what I have done with it.”

CRYPTOGRAM: If you are losing your leisure, look out! You are losing your soul.

firearms

“We Don’t Need More Guns” So before you write a mean email let me explain why I chose to title this article “We Don’t Need More Guns” as you might know there are massive campaigns dedicated to disarmament in the US. Their motto is “We don’t need more guns” and I’m actually inclined to agree with them on that point. If you just threw your copy of The Loafer, go retrieve it, dust it off, and give me a chance to explain. According to a BBC report showcasing gun violence in America there are approximately 300 million firearms in the United States. As of 2014 there were 245,273,438 adults (persons over 18 years of age) in the US, that’s 1.22 firearms per person. Now obviously every person over the age of 18 in this country doesn’t own a firearm, but I wanted to share those statistics to show that there are in fact enough firearms in this country, not counting the ones being manufactured as we speak to arm every citizen over the age of 18.

Now I’ve been writing for The Loafer for almost a year, and I’m pretty sure you would have picked up on it if I were in any way anti-gun, which wouldn’t make any sense since I’ve also been a Firearms Instructor for years. So how could a pro-gun informed citizen possibly concede that we don’t need more guns? The answer is very simple, what we need are more law abiding, trained, sane, and in-

formed citizens. It doesn’t matter that there are enough guns in the US for everyone to have one when it seems a quarter of people aren’t interested in firearms, a quarter are against firearms altogether, a tenth are using them for crime, and a third are so caught up in the Second Amendment that they forget that they have no idea how to shoot that gun they just bought and certainly have no clue about the laws are governing the use of deadly force. I don’t claim those numbers to be exact statistically, but they paint a fairly clear picture of the attitudes of Americans today.

Instead of focusing on what they perceive to be the problem (the availability of firearms) these campaigns should be focusing on the real problem, a severe shortage of trained and informed citizens.

According to Americangunfacts.com 3 out of 5 felons interviewed said “they wouldn’t mess with an armed victim”. So no matter which side of the political fence you find yourself on, I encourage you not to focus on what the media tells you is the problem, but what in fact is the problem. I know I broke the third window with this article and said “I” and “we” a bunch, I typically try to keep my articles third person but I felt my readers needed to know this one was coming from me and not a bunch of statistics.

As always I hope you enjoyed this article if you have any questions or concerns please feel free to email me, I look forward to your feedback.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-34996604 http://datacenter.kidscount.org/data/tables/99-total-population-by-child-andadult#detailed/1/any/false/869,36,868,867,133/39,40,41/416,417 http://americangunfacts.com/

theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 27

Answers found on page 26

28 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

pets of the week

Lucky and Trixie are 5 year old Yorkies that are neutered and up to date on all vaccines. They are brothers and deeply bonded so must be adopted together.

Emma is a year old domestic short hair that is spayed and up to date on all vaccines. She loves to play and is ready to be loved!

The Bridge Home has an ongoing aluminum can can collection in front of the shelter at 2061Hwy 75 in Blountville,TN 37617. The cans are collected by a volunteer and the money from the aluminum goes towards badly needed food and supplies for the animals The Bridge Home No Kill Animal Rescue recently moved in to their new 7,300 sq foot building @ 2061 Hwy 75 Blountville, TN,37617. The Bridge Home is a non profit 501(c)(3) organization established in 2002 dedicated to the welfare of homeless or abandoned animals. They provide care and compassion for stray and unwanted cats and dogs until they can be adopted into a forever home.

Every animal in their care is spayed or neutered and fully vaccinated before being adopted. Being a non profit the shelter is funded entirely by membership dues and private donations. They always need volunteers or monetary donations. Other always needed items:pet food, cat litter & cat toys dog treats & dog toys,paper towels, cleaners, office supplies,Purina weight circles.

Phone: 423.239.5237 Hours are Mon-Fri 12pm-6pm Sat 12pm-3pm and Sun 2pm-4pm. Website is www.bridgehomerescue@gmail.com or like them on Facebook: www.Facebook.com/bridgehome?fref=ts.

SELL .... YOUR .... STUFF

www.theloaferonline.com theloaferonline.com | March 22, 2016 | 29

opinion

DRUMS IN OUR PANTS As a musician, I am constantly on the lookout for new and interesting ways to create music. Tools for making music are found in often unexpected places, from spoons and rubber bands to combs and tissue paper. And, let’s not forget that one of the finest musical instruments in the world is the human voice—an instrument that all of us carry around with us. I am sorry to say my personal instrument isn’t very im-

pressive.

A l though I can whistle, I dare not try to sing. You don’t want to hear that, believe me.

In 2007, I was intrigued by a start-up called DrumPants, the brainchild of Lei Yu and Tyler Freeman.

After patiently collecting kickstarter-type money over the years, the company has released DrumPants 2.0, and its website now carries the message that all of its supply has been temporarily sold out. New orders, of course, are being taken and for just under $200.00 you can have your own custom set of drums. Unlike traditional drum kits, these new drums are, as the name implies, designed to be concealed inside your pants. What a strange, innovative, and slightly risqué concept. I urge you to watch the inevitable YouTube videos.

DrumPants’ appeal is that, as the developer’s website proclaims, you

30 | March 22, 2016 | theloaferonline.com

can “make beats anywhere with wearable triggers.”

What this means is that by placing a series of rubberized strips under your pants, shirt, or even in your shoes you can turn your body into a percussion kit.

The strips are nothing more than MIDI (Musical Instrument Digital Interface—a neat little digital protocol introduced in 1983) triggers that communicate with the DrumPants sound module or with a variety of Apps, including GarageBand, Loopy, or even Pandora (i.e. you can be the guest drummer on countless musical recordings). That’s right--slap your right knee and trigger a snare drum, slap your left knee and alternately create a rhythm on a high hat or tom-tom, and tap your foot and hear a variety of bass drum effects. In fact, you are not limited to drum sounds. MIDI interface can trigger any instrument under the sun—from pianos and organs to synthesizers and barking dogs.

Just imagine—your body transformed into an orchestra or a rock band!

One of the most interesting things about the DrumPants website is a section containing testimonials and videos from users. For instance, a musician who calls himself “Chopsticky” confesses that “It just felt groovy having nothing in front of me . . .no equipment I need to hunch over. You don’t have to hit it that hard or with your whole hand . . .” When is the last time you heard someone use the word “groovy”? And a musician named Ryan, who creates percussion loops, enjoys the ability he has to “Make loops anywhere. Work on songs even when not connected to an outlet. Inspiration strikes in random places.”

DrumPants is yet another addition to the growing selection of wearable technology that promises to shape our future in new and unexpected ways. Imagine, if you will, a person walking down the street, wearing Google Glass and using his or her AppleWatch as the control module for their DrumPants. Talk about a one man (or one woman) band. Needless to say, Siri or Alexa will somehow be a vital part of this scenario.

I have been living with MIDI triggers since the early 1980s, when I started out my career in the retail musical field. I feel grateful to have been present when MIDI was first introduced and I became accustomed

to using keyboard instruments to trigger a whole universe of sound.

I watched a whole procession of MIDI-enhanced instruments, from guitars, flutes, saxophones, and drum kits appear on the scene. But in those early days there were no wearables, and we couldn’t use our phones as sound modules. Today, music has joined the Internet of Things (IoT) and I am looking forward to the technology found in DrumPants to be expanded to MIDI-triggered furniture, kitchen appliances, and even walls. Of course, all this is possible today.

Just imagine a MIDI-equipped mattress that turns our tossing and turning into musical signals. I guess the less said about this the better. No doubt some marketing genius is already working on this.

My favorite use of MIDI at the moment is connecting my keyboard to the GarageBand app that resides in my iPad. Now that GarageBand has been updated to include a variety of drum loops and ambient rhythms (in addition to its arsenal of keyboards, strings, guitars, synthesizers, and wind and brass instruments), it has become one of the best performance and recording apps on the planet and my personal favorite; and I just downloaded Loopy to my iPad desktop and look forward to what it might do to make things even more interesting. I guess now I should be anticipating adding my pants and shoes to the mix. I cringe when I think of what someone might say—“Our pants are alive with the sound of music.”

I encourage you to explore this brave new world of musicmaking. Even if you don’t consider yourself a musician, you can tap out rhythms on your tablet or smartphone—and soon on your pants.

Will wonders never cease? See you next week with more news from the strange and wonderful world of pop culture.

PLACING A CLASSIFED LINE AD:

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01 General Items 50 Farming

85 Jobs various territories throughout Tri-

133 Painting

time - Full time. Flexible hours.

Must have reliable transportation, smart phone & self-motivated.

Join The Loafer team today! Email resumes to info@theloafeornline. com

Bedrooms, Living Rooms, Kitchens, Offices, WHOLE HOUSES, anything you want, Competitive Pricing, Flexible Schedules, Call David or Lisa, 423-430-7358

LIVESTOCK WATER TANK Cities. Must be enthusiastic, hardworking, positive, successful. Part & DEICER Phone: 423-943-3608 Price: $ 80.00 Tuff Stuff Heavy Duty Oval a110 gallon tank, approximately 8 months old. In excellent condition. Allied Precision 2002DP Universal Drain Plug Deicer, that fits the above tank. Deicer is brand new, still in box, never used. Will sell separately. Tank $50.00; Deicer $30.00. Both purchased at Tractor Supply.

137 Transportation 141 Motorcycle/Scooters 2004 Honda XR50

Phone: 423-383-3553 Price: $ 600.00 Great running bike

70 Real Estate 72 For Sale

***Condo for sale ***

Price: $ 99,900.00 Woodstone Condos. 2 bedroom / 1.5 bath. Remax Checkmate. Contact: Wayne Bartley 423-292-2595, Deborah Bartley 423-686-6180

Homes like this don’t come available often!

Phone: 423-612-1367 Price: $ 132,000.00 306 Mockingbird Place, Blountville, TN. 3 bedrooms, 1 bath 1,080 sqft. Completely remodeled with features including hardwood floors throughout the home, updated bathroom, recessed lighting, crown molding, new roof in 2010, multi zone surround sound system wired to every room and outside the home, ADT pulse security system with motion sensors and video cameras. Contact David Fletcher - Caldwell Banker 423612-1367

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146 Mind, Body & Spirit

147 Counseling Services

Creative Interior Home Painting. Creative Interiors Painting,

121 General Services

You’re important. Let us show you how! Hiring Drivers: OTR, Regional, Teams, Owner Opps.

Morristown Drivers Service, Inc. 844-MDS-Jobs. www.MDStrucking.com

63 Community

175 Church Announcements EASTER EGGS-TRAVAGANZA

Contact Johnson City Parish UMC Phone: 423-741-4556 – Johnson City Parish UMC. Saturday, March 26, 2016 10am-12pm at Northside Elementary School on the ball field. Come join us for a morning of Easter egg hunting, games, and more!! Sponsored by Cokesbury in JC, East Pine Grove Park, Otterbein, and West Market Street United Methodist Churches.

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SOCIAL SECURITY DISABILITY BENEFITS. Unable

to work? Denied benefits? We Can Help! WIN or Pay Nothing! Contact Bill Gordon & Associates at 1-800-864-9032 to start your application today!

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