The Loafer May 23rd by The Loafer

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

on the cover

Summer Guide

Volume 31 • Issue #25 Publisher Luci Tate Editor Graphic Arts Director Don Sprinkle

30 Stargazer Leo Roars and Big Dipper Pours Into the Night 31 Skies This Week 32 Batteries Not Included The Loved One in May 37 Pop Life Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 39 The Casual Word Look Ahead 41 Appalachian Wanderers Obed River 48 Puzzle Page 51 Kelly’s Place Is Spinning and Fidgeting Out of Control??

5 7 8 9 11 12 12 13 14 15 16 19 21 22 23 25 28 34 35 36 40 42 45 46 47 49 50

your week’s line-up

columns & reviews

Cover Design Bill May

Staycations are Fun June Summer Guide July Summer Guide August Summer Guide High Adventure & Family Rafting Appalachian Caverns Letter to the Publisher Soda Fest Hits Jonesborough Downtown Marion's Summer of Music Dine JC Rock and Roll Freakshow An Acoustic Evening What is Off The Grid Mtn Adventures? Open Call for Vendor Applications Get A "Clue" @ Capitol Theater Annual Memorial Day Race Spotlight Funkhouser's Old Souls Trio Mountain Park Old Time Band @ Carter Fold Abby, The Spoon Lady Gathering In the Gap Big Train Show Liz Weir, Storytelling Live Warriors, Legends and more @ Bristol Ballet Lamplight's Gospel Singing Pets Of The Week Things To Do

Advertising Dave Carter Patti Barr Paul Kavanaugh Brad Parris Janie Jarvis Renee Taylor Office Coordinator Amanda Lane Contributing Staff Jim Kelly Andy Ross Ken Silvers Mark Marquette Brian Bishop Daniel Worley Jason Worley Langley Shazor Distribution Jerry Hanger Teresa Hanger Published by Pulse Publishing, LLC., P.O. Box 3238, Johnson City, TN 37602 Phone: 423/283-4324 FAX - 423/283-4369 www.theloaferonline.com info@theloaferonline.com e-mail: editorial@theloaferonline.com adcopy@theloaferonline.com All advertisements are accepted and published by the publisher upon the representation that the agency and/ or advertiser is authorized to publish the entire contents and subject matter thereof. The agency and/or advertiser will indemnify and save the publisher harmless from any lossof expense resulting from claims or suits based upon contents of any advertisement, including claims or suits for defamation, libel, right of privacy, plagiarism, and copyright infringement.

Founder: Bill Williams Let’s Get Social!

es indeed, summer is here! School is out or getting out and you need a plan. If you are taking a vacation somewhere, good for you. Our planning advice is still apropos. But many of us aren’t getting away. Relax! You know that line from the old song, “There ain’t no cure for the summertime blues”? Well forget it. We are lucky enough to live in an area where there are multiple cures for the summertime blues. So, let’s plan the perfect Staycation. Funny, that

Planning

his is the most critical part of any vacation, staycation, or darn near anything. I have learned from past experience that the more everyone is involved in the planning process, the better everyone will enjoy themselves. For instance, you might enjoy water adventures, but before you book it, make sure you don’t have any anti-water people involved. Doesn’t mean you can’t go - you just might have to sell them on the idea! Do that before you confirm, not afterwards. I recommend laying out all the days in advance with at least general timeframes. Don’t forget that this is your vacation too, so a little extra sleep should be prominently in the equation. Remember to allow time for supply acquisition or restaurant meals when you put your plan together. If everyone is starving and you have to be there in 20

The Loafer helps you plan the Perfect one By Paul Kavanaugh

word is pretty recent but I remember my family just doing a local hotel with a swimming pool back in the 60s and my brothers and sisters and I all thought we had died and gone to heaven. We have some ideas for you to plan the Perfect Staycation, all courtesy of The Loafer. You know us, we aim to please our readership. So, beg, borrow and steal from the following recommendations – the main thing is to have the entire family enjoy themselves.

minutes, well, ugh. Allow for the weather. Have a backup plan if outdoors activities may be affected. Our recommendations contain many outdoor and indoor activities. We don’t want you to be stuck! Make a supply list. If outdoor activities, are you eating there, are you taking a picnic, maybe eating on the way? Plan this ahead, so that you know where to get the supplies you need or the stops you need to make. Don’t forget a cooler or maybe two, depending on the plans. OK – we’re going to do some planning. Let’s look at some options in several categories. Remember, this is a Staycation, so we’re planning and recommending local.

Headquarters

ou need one, and it it’s all up to you. Some folks like just using their residence as their Staycation Headquarters. Many others like using a local hotel to enhance the “get away” feel that tends to really enhance Staycations. Plus, often there are enticements like a pool that will keep kids entertained for those times when you just don’t want to do anything. Family friendly and accommodating is what we

Adventures

t least one, and more likely two or three days of your Staycation you are going to want to do a major activity, typically some sort of adventure. Our region has few equals in the variety and abundance of accessible adventures. Let’s start off in Elizabethton. Off The Grid is one of our very favorite places. It’s on the Elizabethton Highway, only about 10 minutes from the Bristol Highway. They have zip lines, off road excursions, you can base jump, try rappelling or even experience a gravity-defying giant swing. Fun for the whole family. Allow yourself plenty of time – the kids won’t want to leave, and neither will you! How about some water? Fishing is fun, and any number of local marinas can set you up, but we’re talking adventure. So, let’s plan one. Wahoo’s Adventures is a local company that has been in business for 39 years. They have a variety of options, from whitewater rafting to relax & tube. Their facilities are a half hour to just over an hour from Johnson City, so not a bad drive. And you’re on vacation, so who cares? When

are looking for and we have two recommendations. The Holiday Inn in Bristol is a very nice spot to make your Headquarters; the kids will love it and adult entertainment is typically available on weekend nights. Out Elizabethton way, we like the Americourt. Totally family friendly and the rates are quite reasonable; plus, you can enjoy Friday evening in downtown Elizabethton without having to go very far at all!

planning, discuss what everyone else might enjoy the most and make some appropriate selections. Reservations are highly recommended. If competition is the hot button in your family, Airsoft or Paintball might be just the thing. These are both fun activities, and lend themselves to Saturday afternoons (for planning purposes). Airsoft is a sport where you simulate war games or other tense situations and engage in combat using what amounts to BB guns, although much more sophisticated than that. GSF Airsoft in Piney Flats is the local go to spot. Call for times and which location you will be using. They provide everything you’ll need. If you would rather have things go splat, give Paintball some consideration. The Alternative Sport in Blountville off Exit 66 is a full-service facility and they will rent you all the stuff you need. Saturday afternoons are open for walk-ins as well as reservations. Sometimes just shooting each other with paintballs is the best feeling in the world!

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Staycations are Fun

ince you’ve planned ahead, now decide where to get your supplies. BBQ always makes for a great take along, and Phil’s Dream Pit is the place to go. Then hit George & Sid’s on Commonwealth in Bristol 2 blocks past State. They have a wide array of cold adult beverages as well as snacks, picnic supplies, plastic cups, etc. Don’t forget ice for the cooler. If pizza is your thing, you’ll be close to Boomershine’s on 394. Call ahead and they will have your food ready for you. Wings, salads and subs are also on the menu.

f ever there was a virtual utopia of evening options, the Tri Cities is it. As long as the weather cooperates, there is nothing more fun than a round of miniature golf. Our favorite is the standard, Putt Putt, and there’s a location in Bristol on the Bluff City Highway as well as on Stone Drive in Kingsport. It’s fun, at least mildly competitive (sometimes way more) and always generates a bunch of laughs. Funny how the least likely participant seems to record the best score! Grabbing a cold brew is always fun, and Studio Brew in downtown Bristol is a popular spot and they have great food as well. The kids will love their root beer made on premises (no alcohol, naturally). The adults will revel in their large selection of craft beers, all made right on the premises. Station Brews & Taproom is another downtown option, although the kids won’t find as much for them. If it is you and the spouse and the dog, they are pet friendly and have an extensive selection of craft beers.

The Grand Finale

Daytime & Rain Options

Evenings

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Supplies

ain is a fact of life, so if you find one of your outdoor activities affected by the weather, simply move inside. How about playing some pool? Corner Pocket in Bristol is a family friendly billiards hall. All ages are welcome and the price is right, its just $5 per person to play all day long. It is an alcohol-free space and they have an incredible collection of gas station and oil company memorabilia. You’ll find yourself spending as much time browsing as playing! Movies are certainly another option, with theatres across the Tri Cities. Summer is the time for many big releases. Check our columnists for recommendations.

ow it’s Sunday and you want one more killer activity to top off the old Staycation. Appalachian Caverns in Blountville is the place to go. They have one-hour tours as well as more extensive ones for the real adventurers. Weather doesn’t matter at all since you are going to be underground! They open at 1:00 on Sundays and you can simply drop in and get set for a tour. In the meantime, the kids will love the rock and mineral collection in the store – and they will be talking about the caverns to all of their friends for some time to come. OK, we have given you a lot of good options. Plan that Staycation, make any reservations needed and get going. The family will enjoy and appreciate it, especially when they get included in the planning phase. Good luck!

June 1 – 3 Celebrating Mountain Heritage and the Clinch River Saint Paul VA www.clinchriverfest.com

A Night For Uganda

June 1 5:00pm-8:00pm at Mercantile on State Street, Bristol TN Help Support Amy Lynne's mission trip to serve in Uganda. Percentage of proceeds will benefit Amy Lynne. Raffles with prizes.

Blue Plum Festival

June 2 – 3 Downtown Johnson City, Founders Park The Friendliest Festival In The South www.blueplum.org

Train Show at ETSU Mini dome

June 2 – 3 Johnson City, TN Free parking is available at the ETSU Mini dome Parking Garage. Kids 12 and under are admitted free. Adults are $5 per person

Muddy Creek ATV Nationals

June 3 – 4 Muddy Creek Raceway, Blountville

57th Southeastern Autorama June 3 • 8am Erwin, TN.

Elizabethton Covered Bridge Celebration

June 8 – 10 Elizabethton, TN. Live music, vendors, arts and crafts, Kid's island, Food vendor. Www.elizabethtonchamber.com

Mountains of Music Homecoming

June 9-17 An unforgettable 9 days of concerts and cultural events throughout SW Virginia www.mtnsofmusic.com

Avery County Wine & Beer Festival

Every Saturday starting June 3 – July 1 5:00pm – 9:00pm at The Mall at Johnson City Hope you're ready for some Great Music and Good Times! This will be so much Fun! Live entertainment. Don't Miss This Great Concert! There will be inflatables for the kids and games for all to enjoy, plus more activities! Not to mention Food Trucks for your eating pleasure! Don't Miss It! See you there!

June 10 Event for ages 21+. Join us for a day of special wine and beer tastings from the High Country and surrounding area. The Temperatures are perfect in June in the mountains and this special setting. Don't forget your chair and blanket so you can sit and enjoy beautiful highland setting. Your admission cost and glass will allow you a "flight of tastings" per wine and beer participant. Currently our participants will be: Linville Falls Winery, Banner Elk Winery, Booneshine Brewing Company, Blind Squirrel Brewing Company, Beech Mountain Brewing Company, Lake James Cellars Winery, Boondocks Brewing Company, Appalachian Pepper Company and others. Www.averycounty.com

Elks Lodge #1847 Fundraiser

The Cedar Tree Four-person scramble

Summer Concert Series

June 3 Create a Smile and Ride. All proceeds to the Elks Lodge #1847 benefit charities for local children's needs and events. Live music by Shades of Refinement. Ride starts at 11AM. Registration begins at 10am. For more information contact the Elks Lodge #1847, 1000 N. Sycamore St. Elizabethton ,TN.

June 10 – 11 Golf Club of Bristol Launch party with Ivy Road Friday June 9 Public invited. No cover, BYOB For more information 423-797-4411

Ghundy Ghar 111 War Games

June 16 – 18 Bristol Motor Dragway

June 3 Day and Night events Register online at www.gsfairsoft.com Call 423-391-0121 for more information Jericho Rockin' Road Rally June 3 1100 Jericho Dr. Kingsport TN Registration begins at 8:30am. Stands up at 10am. $20 per person includes T-shirt (while they last) and one door prize ticket. Dice Run. Dice roll and door prize drawings at each stop. Food and beverages available. Music by Shooter Band. Car & Bike Show. All proceeds benefit Jericho Shrine Center

NHRA Thunder Valley Nationals

East Tennessee Walking Horse Classic Horse sHow

June 17 4PM Appalachian Fairgrounds, Gray TN Admission $5.00. To benefit The American Legion, Hammond Post #3, Honor Guard Post 3 & 265 (For memorial services of our Veterans and Fallen Heroes). For further information contact President Ronnie Starnes at 423-782-6581 or visit www.etwha.org for a copy of the show program.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

SUMMER June Guide

Clinch River Days Festival

Hops & Howlers Craft Brew Fest

June 18 4pm-9pm Abingdon Farmers Market Pavilion, Abingdon VA Featuring over 30 craft beers and ciders, with a focus on regional brews, Hops & Howlers is a unique festival, aimed at engaging and educating, and providing the highest quality beer experience for our audience. We limit tickets so that your lines stay short, and we've crafted a great music lineup and delicious food trucks to make your experience top notch. Our Home brew Showcase features an extensive variety of home brew beers, ciders & meade for our attendees to taste and vote on. Our VIP tent gets better every year, and 2016 will offer the most exclusive experience yet, with specialty beers, high-quality snacks and 30 minute head start into the festival. Appalachia has always been known for it's brewing ingenuity, join us as we celebrate that culture! http://www.hopsandhowlers.com/

SUMMER July Guide

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

June

Jonesborough Days

July 1 - 2 • Jonesborough, TN.

Freedom Festival

July 4 5PM to dark • Town of Unicoi

Pepsi Independence Day Celebration July 4 • Freedom Hall, Johnson City

Boone Lake Marina Fireworks Show

July 4 • Call 423-391-7283 for more information

Wild Goose Festival

July 13 – 16 • Hot Springs, NC www.wildgoosefestival.com

Fun Fest 2017

July 14-22 •www.funfest.com The Town of Jonesborough and volunteers plan and organize this annual patriotic festival to celebrate our Nation’s Heritage on the weekend closest to July 4. There is so much for everyone to enjoy the entire weekend: a parade to kick off the festivities, games and an animal petting zoo for the kids, the #OnlyInJonesborough Discovery Park, the Main Stage that boasts musical performers all weekend long, crafters, yummy festival food, and, of course, fireworks. Come and celebrate our Nation’s birthday with us and we promise a weekend that you will never forget!

Spruce Pine BBQ & Bluegrass July 14 – 15 Spruce Pine, NC www.sprucepinebbqbluegrass.com

Putt Putt Fun Fest Tournament

July 18 9 different divisions from kids to seniors. No cost to play. During Kingsport Fun Fest

Hungry Mother Festival

July 21 – 23 • Hungry Mother State Park, NC www.hungrymotherfestival.com

Rhododendron Festival June 18 Roan Mountain State Park www.roanmountain.com

June Bug Boogie Spring Rally June 15-18

Summer Solstice Festival June 24 8AM-10PM Tipton-Haynes State Historic Site, Johnson City TN The Jacobites By Name will be playing at the Summer Solstice festival hosted by the Upper East Tennessee Celtic Society www.uppereasttncelticsociety.org

Hot Springs Rally June 23-45

Rally In The Valley

July 21-23 Shady Valley TN For more information call 423-739-2325

Annual Brody's Run for Spina Bifita Dice Roll

July 22 Live entertainment with Southbound & the return of Bonnie Blue $20 a bike / $5 for passenger Can buy extra rolls. Prizes for Highest/Lowest Rolls. Door prizes & 50/50. Raffle Tickets - $1 or $5 for 6 For more information call 423-297-5675 or 423-747-0247

QuiltFest 2017 July 27 - 29 Jonesborough TN

Hillbillies & Veterans Kick Off Party

July 28 6:30PM to 1AM For more information call 423-948-8670 or 423-483-3468

VA Highlands Festival July 28 – August 6

Rob-Con

July 29-30 9:00AM – 5:30PM Viking Hall – TN Rob-Con is the Tri-Cities best comic book convention and its brought to you by your friends at Mountain Empire Comics! $10 admission for one day - $15 for both days. Children under 6 admitted free. Vendor tables are $85 each for the first two and $75 for three or more. Golden, Silver and Modern Age comics for sale, along with toys, anime, art and more. Plus our popular costume contest!

Hillbillies & Veterans Flag Run

July 29 8:30AM Begins at Smith Brothers HD For more information call 423-948-8670 or 423-483-3468

August 4 – 5 1PM – 3PM • Greeneville TN Smoky Mountain F-Body Fest 2017 is a event you don't want to miss out on. Our Show has moved to a TWO DAY EVENT. This is a Fundraiser Event for St Jude's Children's Research Hospital. It is open to any and all Camaro and Firebirds!!!!!!!

Downtown Kingsport Wine Festival

August 5 1PM – 6PM Downtown Kingsport TN Sanctioned by the Tennessee Farm Winegrowers Association, a dozen wineries from across Tennessee will provide samples of their labels, visitors will stroll from tent to tent enjoying tastes of rich wines, shopping local artisans, enjoying music and southern foods.

Knights of Columbus Annual Putt Putt Tournament August 6 4pm • Kingsport Putt Putt

Greene County Fair

August 7 – 13 • Greeneville, TN. Www.greenecountyfair.com

Little Chicago Music & Arts Festival

August 11 – 12 • Downtown Johnson City Created by the Johnson City Downtown Merchant's Association is the 1st Annual Little Chicago Downtown Music and Arts Festival! A festival created by Downtown for the community to enjoy live music, art and activities. More details will be coming soon! Www.littlechicagofestival.com

2nd Annual Ride To Rescue: Motorcycle Run

August 12 • Boones Creek Christian Church $15 entry fee donation includes coffee & donuts. 9:15am Registration @ Boones Creek Christian Church + Coffee & Donuts 9:45am • Announcements, surprise games, Longest Beard & Best Tattoo Contest 10:15am • Kickstands up! 11:30-?? • MORE FOOD & Best Bike Contest Please e-mail jurneesjourney@gmail.com with any questions or to let us know your group # attending. Let's RIDE to RESCUE our furry friends awaiting their FURever home! Maggie Valley Summer Rally August 17-19 Food City 500 Nascar Race August 19 • Bristol Motor Speedway, Bristol TN

Appalachian Fair

August 22 – 26 • Gray TN www.appalachianfairgrounds.com

Christian Storytelling Festival

August 26 7:00PM ªProvidence Academy, JC TN The 2017 Christian Storytelling Festival concert will be held at Providence Academy on Saturday, August 26, 2017, at 7:00 p.m. Danny Gokey will be our featured storyteller and singer. Tickets may be purchased at www.christianstorytellingfestival.com. The concert will be held in the Providence Academy gymnasium. All seats are $18.50 and are General Admission. The doors open at 6:15 P.M., and the event starts at 7:00 P.M.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

SUMMER August Guide

Smoky Mountain F-Body Fest

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

High Adventure Rafting on the NOLICHUCKY RIVER

Best rafting in the region, just north of Asheville, NC, and south of Johnson City, TN.

afting for ages eight and up... Nestled deep in the Appalachian Mountains of western North Carolina and eastern Tennessee, the Nolichucky River Gorge winds through steep-walled canyons and remote thickly-forested mountains. The Nolichucky River is said to be one of the most technical big water runs in the south, demanding the coordinated efforts of the raft “crew” and an experienced guide to negotiate the twists and turns, and the drops and falls of the river. The trip on the Nolichucky is a true wilderness adventure, taking the rafter through the breathtaking rugged beauty of the backwoods of the Pisgah and Cherokee National Forest. The sheer rock walls of the canyon tower 2,800 feet from the base of the river to the pine-

covered peaks of the mountains; a true natural treat for anyone who visits the area. This river drops approximately 66-feet per mile over the rst four miles, creating adrenaline pumping Class III, IV and V rapids. The run can be enjoyed by all but the youngest children. Wahoo’s Adventures has several options available for groups both large and small to experience a run on the Nolichucky. All tours include a buffet lunch with fresh deli meats, peanut butter and jelly, veggies/ fruit, cheeses, and a dessert. For the outdoor adventure you have always desired, without any of the usual headaches of planning an outing, Wahoo’s Adventures makes that dream come true. Licensed and permitted by the U.S. Forest Service.

Family Rafting on the WATAUGA RIVER Oftentimes family and adventure are hardpressed to be found in the same sentence, but not at Wahoo’s Adven- tures. On this quiet and picturesque river, family and adventure go hand-inhand, with programs designed for all ages. Gentle rolling class I and II rapids and one exciting class III complement this serene oat trip through the Tennessee foothills where farms and wildlife dot the landscape surrounding this beautiful river and its ecosys- tem. The starting point is at the base of the highest TVA dam and proceeds through a cliffsided valley where the water is clear enough to see to the bottom 20 feet below. The trip begins with a

pause at Jump Off Rock, where interested paddlers can climb to the top of an 18-foot cliff and jump to the water below! Don’t worry...jumping is optional. However, if jumping off a cliff is on your bucket list, then Jump Off Rock is a MUST! The Watauga River is ideal for families with small children, as well as the kid in everyone. Wahoo’s is the only rafting company with full-service facilities located right on the river. Guests are welcome to enjoy the grassy beach, picnic shelter and campgrounds, and maybe a little shing if you brought your pole. Don’t miss this fantastic family adventure that will have you going... “WAHOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!”

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

One of our Regions Real Treasures

Appalachian Caverns

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Appalachian Caverns and Campground, located in Northeast Tennessee just outside of downtown Blountville, is a glorious example of the majesty of nature.

t is the perfect destination to experience amazing natural beauty located deep beneath the Earth's surface. The site features guided tours of the caverns, a campground, picnic area, gem mine, and gift shop. You can take their standard one-hour tour and be amazed at what Mother Nature has done UNDER the ground in Tennessee. More extensive exploring options are available. Archaeological evidence released in February of 2006 revealed that the caverns were used by Early Woodland Native Americans over 1300 years ago. The archeologists found burnt firewood located in a fire pit that has been radiocarbon dated to 675 A.D. They also found pottery, arrowheads, and other evidence of habitation. The log cabin located on the property was discovered to have been built in 1777. Historical documents located in the Sullivan County Archives indicate the caverns and cabin were used as a stopover point and shelter during the harsh winter months as settlers were making their way westward. Due to the size of the cavern it could handle housing larger groups of people and because of the wind flow, fires could be built for heat and cooking. With the abundance of bat dung (an important ingredient in the making of gunpowder at the time) and the fairly consistent temperature, this made the cavern a good place to stay when the weather was cold. Come see for yourself. They are open Mon – Sat 9AM - 6PM and Sunday 1PM - 5PM. You don’t need reservations although it is always a good idea to call ahead. By Paul Kavanaugh

Letter to the Publisher

Ms. Luci Tate, I just wanted to say congratulations on the one year anniversary of Appalachian Wanderers. Throughout the year, Jason and Daniel Worley have provided so much great information and fun places concerning our Appalachian home. Their articles are not only insightful, but also very well written in a professional manner. When I get my Loafer each week, I turn to their page and read their article first. I plan several trips this summer based upon their articles. I also want to thank you for allowing Jason and Daniel to be open about their relationship and marriage. As a member of a local employee resource group that focuses on LGBT issues, I am so proud that they are featured in a local publication such as The Loafer and can be authentic. I have shared their articles with our membership also. It’s small steps like this that will lead to acceptance of all people in our East Tennessee region. Mark McDavid

Soda Fest and Movies on Main to kick off Jonesborough’s big festival season on May 27.

oda Fest is designed to expand your taste buds with exposure to flavorful soda pop while providing a different festival style experience bringing generations together while sampling a variety of different sodas, some you’ve heard of and some that will make your taste buds ask for more. “The idea is simple and we will incorporate an initiative for business to be open later downtown,” Jeff Gurley said. “Alive after 5 is an organized effort to promote Historic Jonesborough on Saturday evenings during the summer months. Most downtown businesses and restaurants will be open later on Saturday evenings June through August.” Jonesborough’s downtown is already Alive after 5 on Saturday evenings with food, outdoor movies and theatre performances, and the Jonesborough Area Merchants & Services Association wanted to make an effort to give the community somewhere to eat, shop and be entertained in their hometown during the summer months. “There are wine tastings and beer festivals. I thought Soda Fest would be something different and fun for the entire family to enjoy.” Gurley said. Soda Fest will take place from 4 to 8 p.m. with soda stop

tastings all along Main Street and Jonesborough’s Historic District. Each soda stop will include a soda jerk who will be pouring the samples in 2 oz. cups for festival goers to enjoy. “One of the most talked about soda stops has been the totally gross sodas from Avery's Beverages including Bug Barf, Zombie Brain Juice, Toxic Slime, Monster Mucas, Kitty Piddle and Dog Drool,” Gurley said. Those who enjoy nostalgic candies from the past will savor the Astro Pop Pineapple, Cherry and Passion Fruit flavors. Mexican Pepsi and Coke will also be available with classics like Cheerwine, Nehi Peach, Orange Crush and NuGrape. Green River Snappy Lime has the sweet taste of a lollipop and its bright green color has been around since 1919. “While many people have enjoyed Orange Crush, did you know there is a Strawberry Crush and Grape Crush too? We’ll have those classic sodas, as others might be tempted to try our bizarre flavors too,” Gurley said. If sampling rare sodas is your goal, the Peanut Butter and Jelly, Chocolate Chip, Bacon, Pumpkin Pie, Sweet Corn, Buffalo Wing and Ranch Dressing flavors will also be on site for tasting.

Soda Fest will take place on May 27 and will be similar to the popular Chocolate Fest event held in Jonesborough this past February, with each soda tasting requiring one ticket. Ticket packs are available in increments of 15 tickets for $12. Tickets available now by visiting Jonesborough. com or calling 423-753-1010.

theloaferonline.com | March 28, 2017

Soda Fest Hits Jonesborough

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Summer Of Music

Marion, Virginia is hands down, the coolest place to be this summer! The Town of Marion and Marion Downtown are partnering together and have big plans to fill the summer evenings with FREE music for everyone to enjoy!

oin the Town of Marion and Marion VFW Post 4667 as they host "The Governor's Own" Virginia National Guard Band LIVE in concert on Saturday, May 27th at 7pm at The Lincoln Theatre in downtown Marion! Cost for the event is free, but you will be required to have an official ticket to enter the theatre. Tickets are on a first come, first serve basis, and you can pick up tickets at The Lincoln Theatre or by calling (276)783-6093. On Sunday, May 28th, "Letters From Home," an annual event sponsored by the VFW Post 4667 will be hosting a free concert at 3pm at The Lincoln Theatre! On Monday, May 29th at 10am, join us for our annual Memorial Day Grand Parade on Main Street, with a patriotic program and community cookout following the parade at the VFW. This year's Summer Concert Series consists of four concerts throughout June and July. Concerts are FREE to the public and are held at the Farmers Market Pavilion in the Town Square Parking Lot in downtown Marion (located on the corner of Town and Chestnut Streets) and begin at 8 PM! Kicking off downtown Marion's FREE Concert Series on Friday June 9th is Acoustifried, a country rock band based out of the Tri-cities area. On Friday, June 23rd, join the Marcus Boyd Band as they perform LIVE. On Tuesday July 4th, at 7pm, Jigsaw Jane, a regional favorite, will be performing LIVE in concert on Broad Street! Bring a lawn chair or blanket to set on, your favorite dancin' shoes and enjoy listening to some rock n' roll! Continuing downtown Marion's FREE Concert Series on Friday, July 14th is Adam

"Bovine" Bolt. The third weekend in July is always the biggest weekend in Marion. The Arts & Crafts Festival at Hungry Mother State Park, LIVE music events downtown, a Chili Cook-off and so much more, you're bound to fall in love with America's Coolest Hometown! On Friday July 21st, join Marion Downtown as they host a street dance on Main Street in front of the Court House. Local favorite, Phantom, will be performing live 7:00pm 10:00pm. For over thirty years, the Chili Cook-off has become a homecoming event for locals, and a must-see experience for out-of-towners. On Saturday July 22nd, beginning at 12pm, Jigsaw Jane will be back in downtown Marion performing LIVE on Broad Street for the Shine n' Show Car Show. At 5pm, NewTown takes the main stage. Bringing a feel of "Newgrass" sounds, they create a unique sound that can definitely be appreciated in Southwest Virginia. At 6pm, Marcus Boyd Band will be performing again in downtown Marion for the second time this summer. At 7pm, Annabelle's Curse takes the main stage. Annabelle’s Curse is a five-piece alternative folk band hailing from Bristol TN/VA. Remember Virginia Ground? They're back in business, and will be performing LIVE at the Chili Cook-off at 8pm.

Got an event coming up?

Events

Send it to The Loafer!

Concerts info@theloaferonline.comExhibits

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

A taste of Downtown Johnson City

Dine JC Festivals

Restaurants in the downtown 15 district have come together to offer a night to savor. dineJC is an event where local restaurants will offer samples of their newest creations and their beloved recipes. On May 23 at 6 pm at the Gallery, guests can sample the many tastes Downtown Johnson City has to offer.

articipating restaurants will feature special menu items, chef’s specials, and new this year, the restaurants are bringing their best bartender with a signature cocktail. Diners can sample our newest restaurants, dine at old favorites and taste a variety of exceptional dishes being prepared by chefs and the best bartenders in town. Restaurants participating in dineJC include: Cake Buds, Holy Taco, The Label, Main Street Pizza Company, Southern Craft, Sharp’s Deli, Tipton Street Pub, Wellingtons, Wild Wing Café, and White Duck Taco Shop. Also YeeHaw and JRH Breweries will be pouring. More to be announced. The event is ticketed entry and costs $25 in advance or $30 at the door. The proceeds go to fund the Achieving Landmark Status project to revitalize the sign on Commerce Street and make Johnson City impossible to ignore. What used to be an old treasure, the 60-foottall structure that began in 1959 as Thomas Laguardia Jr.’s Giant Food sign, is becoming Johnson City’s newest landmark. At dineJC, people have an opportunity to eat local, drink local, and fund-raise for a local campaign. It’s the locals’ night. Dine JC is sponsored by the Johnson City Development Authority and Ameriprise Financial, The Torbett Group. Tickets are available online on Eventbrite, and at the Washington County Economic Development Council, 300 E. Main Street, Suite 406, in downtown Johnson City from 9 am – 4 pm. For more information go to DowntownJC.com or call 423-202-3510.

The Loafer Interview by Jeffery Allen Payne

ROCK AND ROLL FREAK SHOW

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

THE TRI CITIES’ GENUINE AUTHENTIC

Kingsport based “Rock and Roll Freak Show” is the dream child of Bloomingdale resident Gary Bortz, owner of Bortz Grapix Plus on Broad Street. The group is aptly named.

s soon as Bortz, along with bassist and vocalist Scott Alley, vocalist and guitar player Scott Javens, and drummer/percussionist Chris Smith step onto the stage, you immediately realize that this isn’t going to be your typical rock performance. First of all, the band enjoys dressing in a…shall we say, unusual motif. Then, Bortz speaks into the microphone. There is no sleepwalking through a setlist; there is humor and interactive banter throughout. Anyone can play songs and ignore the audience; these fellas make it clear that they come to create a musical circus.

In fact, Bortz describes the show as being “like an 1800’s Steampunk inspired Circus Sideshow, complete with a psychotic Ringmaster, performing your favorite classic rock songs from AC/ DC to ZZ Top”. “We have fun, is the philosophy of the band,” Bortz says. “I go out there with the Mad Hatter top hat and the Barnum and Bailey outfits. I mean, you can go to the VFW and see a band, but I personally don’t want to watch a bunch of guys in T-shirts. I want entertainment. I go out in the crowd. We all do, if it’s feasible to do so, and get on the dance floor and play. And, it’s not about the rock star image. I’m putting my arm around them, and I’m really interacting with the people. That’s what WE want to do. In between sets, I’m walking around the room and talking to people, especially if I don’t know them. I thank them for coming out, and if I spot the one person that looks like they’re going to be the hardest to sell, I walk up to them and say, ‘Thank you for coming out and spending your money to see us.’ I mean it ain’t about the fame and fortune….we’re getting beer spilled on us… (laughs). What it’s all about is, when everyone goes home that night, I want them to say, ‘Ya know, that was fun.’”

Continued on page 18

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FREAKSHOW continued from page 16 One of the causes that the band strongly embraces, is that they hold veterans in high esteem. In fact, they play a “Wounded Warriors” benefit every year. Then, Bortz stumbled upon something and had a bit of an epiphany musically and personally: “I came across ‘Walking on a Thin Line’ by Huey Lewis, and I love the song. It’s a great song, so I sat and watched the video to check out the chord structures and everything. As I’m watching it, by the end of the song, I’m shaking in tears. Because, I never knew the song is about coming home from Vietnam, and I said ‘There’s no way we’re NOT doing this song.’ It’s in every show.” As a band of brothers themselves, Rock and Roll Freak Show’s members have known each other for many years and have played together for four. They’ve become favorites at area shows and festivals like the Kingsport Funfest Mardi Gras Celebration and opened for such bands as Molly Hatchet. “Molly Hatchet was awesome. They were down to earth. When I met them the first time, they were more business. The second time, the fact that they remembered me, he just said, ‘Dude’. And, here I am with my top hat on. He’s wearing that Stetson or whatever it is he wears. He takes his off and says, ‘Let me see that’. We got pictures of us swapping hats.” It’s easy to figure out why Molly Hatchet remembered Rock and Roll Freak Show. Bortz is not shy to say, “You can have the five best musicians in the world playing together, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to happen on stage. When you can burp on stage, and the guy next to you says,

‘I knew that was going to happen’. When you’re that synchronized together….that’s what we have. We’re going to PUT ON A SHOW at QStock and send those people home happy!” Rock and Roll Freak Show is part of the incredible lineup at WQUT’s “QStock Music Festival” at Kingsport Speedway this Saturday. Other acts include Ali Randolph and the Outta Luck Band, Asylum Suite, and the legendary Mothers Finest. Doors open at noon. First band hits the stage at 2:00pm. No coolers, food, drink or pets; there will be refreshments and food on site. Tickets are $26, plus tax and service charges, and available at www. wqut.com. They can also be purchased at the WQUT studios and at the door. The show is sponsored by Bud Light, Mello Mushroom, The Loafer and 1015 WQUT….Tri Cities Classic Rock.

An Acoustic Evening Friday Night at Holston River Brewing Company

By Paul Kavanaugh

A great entertainment lineup will treat music fans this Friday at The Brewery. Featured acts are Trapt, Smile Empty Soul and A Toy Called God.

rapt is a well-known band that features Modern Rock and Alternative. Their record label is Crash Collide/The End/ADA. Get their NEW album DNA at bit. ly/TraptDNA and email traptpromos@gmail.com and they'll send you bonus track "Panic Room". Get a signed copy at any Best Buy! Smile Empty Soul is a rock and alternative band out of LA. Together since 1998, they are on the label Two Disciples Entertainment/Pavement Ent Group/Sony/Red. Their latest album, Chemicals, is out and available â&#x20AC;&#x201C; and doing well! Founded in 2010, A Toy Called God is a groove metal band from Brentwood, California that mixes crushing distortion, great hooks and an amazing ability to make your head bang involuntarily. Their debut CD, Toy Called God, was released in 2012. With these great bands and perhaps a few surprises, this should be one great evening at Holston River Brewing Company. Add to it their great food and wonderful craft beers and you have all you need. See you there!

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Tri Cities Live Presents

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

And why do you want to go there?

Located in Elizabethton on 19E about halfway between the Bristol Highway and downtown Elizabethton, Off the Grid Mountain Adventures features one of the longest zip lines in the country, at nearly 3000 feet long, the length of 10 football fields, and close to 300 feet above the canyon floor, reaching speeds up to 60 miles per hour. Those who are competitive will enjoy the dual zip line where you can race your friends and family. Unlike most zip lines where the zipper controls their speed and safety, their highly-trained staff does the braking for you, making your experience safer and a lot more fun.

By Paul Kavanaugh

hey also offer a ride to the top of the mountain in a Hagglund, which is an incredible military transport vehicle imported from Sweden. It’s designed to take troops where no other vehicle could, and Off the Grid Mountain Adventures is the only place in the country to experience one. Another amazing thrill they offer is one of the area’s only gravity defying giant swings. Once you’re harnessed in and seated, you’re hoisted up 50 feet (That's 5 stories!) Once you pull the release, you are weightless for a moment then swing out in a 100-ft. pendulum, reaching speeds of 50 miles per hour. If that's not enough adrenaline, they have a 60-ft. tower in the sky which is also a part of the zip tour. You can zip back out, belay down (a form of repelling), or for those that dare, take the leap of faith. A tether is attached to your harness and you walk the plank, step off, and freefall 20+ feet before a quick jump device kicks in and lowers you safely to the ground. The complete course was engineered to the highest of all safety standards by a licensed Tennessee engineer. Once it was completed and successfully inspected, it was inspected again by a neutral third-party inspector. All the staff has been certified by the same guidelines and your safety is their number one priority. Ready for some real adventure? Give them a call or just stop by for the time of your life.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

What is Off the Grid Mountain Adventures

OPEN CALL For Vendor Applications

38th Annual Christmas Connection

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DATES/HOURS

alling all ARTISTS, ARTISANS, CREATIVES, AND CRAFTSPEOPLE of all trades! Applications are being taken for those wishing to exhibit in this 3-day event, which is by invitation only. All applications are reviewed by a selection committee, taking various factors into consideration in order to create a high quality, attractive show having a good mix of artistic creations. Application deadline is July 1, 2017. There is no cost to apply. The Christmas Connection, an event sponsored by the City of Kingsport Office of Cultural Arts, is celebrating 38 years of artistic creations in 2017. A very well established cultural event in Kingsport, the event hosts the region’s best craftspeople, artisans, artists, and creatives. People from our region and beyond look forward to The Christmas Connection year after year. This year’s event will take place the first full weekend in November, Friday through Sunday, at the Kingsport Civic Auditorium. Free admission to the public!

Fri. Nov. 3: 12Noon – 7PM Sat. Nov. 4: 10AM – 5PM Sun. Nov. 5: 12Noon – 4PM APPLICATIONS DEADLINE IS JULY 1, 2017.

To access the vendor application from the city website, and for more information visit www.KingsportTN.gov or www.EngageKingsport.com

@ The Capitol Theater

Was it Mrs. Peacock in the hall with the knife? Col. Mustard in the conservatory with the rope? Maybe it was someone else?

he Capitol Theater of Greeneville Tennessee is proud to present one of the most beloved movies of all time, the 1985 cult classic “Clue,” on June 1st at 7:30 PM. Based upon the popular board game, “Clue” takes the familiar line up of suspects, rooms, weapons and blends them into an ensemble comedy starring Eileen Brennan, Tim Curry, Madeline Kahn, Christopher Lloyd, Michael McKean, Martin Mull, and Lesley Ann Warren. In keeping with the spirit of the board game “Clue” has three endings, a different one appearing at each theater when the film was originally released. For this screening we will be presenting all three endings. Local film columnist Andy Ross (The

Loafer, The Retro Set) will introduce the film with a few remarks “I must confess I will be glowing more than usual, as ‘Clue’ is one of my absolute favorite films” Ross said, “I hope everyone comes out to see this on the big screen, in what should be an absolute blast of an evening.” In addition to showing the movie The Capitol will be having a costume contest as well, the winner of which will receive a reproduction of the 1986 edition of the board game. Let your inner Mr. Green or Ms. Scarlet out! There will be a pre-show on the screen that will play half an hour before the film. Doors open at 7:00 PM. Come to a murderously fun evening at The Capitol Theater! Just don’t accept any presents from strange men beforehand…

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Get A "Clue"

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Annual Memorial Day Race to Benefit The American Cancer Society

THE HOPE 4 race and wellness walk starts at 8:04AM on Memorial Day, May 29, in Greeneville, TN. Now in its seventh year, THE HOPE 4 has become a Memorial Day tradition for families across the region.

iscount registration is offered to cancer survivors, members of the military and veterans, police, fire fighters, and EMS personnel. The event features courses through beautiful countryside and an exciting finish at the Tusculum College Indoor Practice Field. Local musicians provide entertainment along the way, and more music and great snacks greet participants at the finish line inside the Indoor Practice Field. Kids 4-10 may participate in supervised activities within the Indoor Practice Field while parents participate in the 4-mile race or 4K wellness walk. Kidz Run 4 Fun, an indoor 1-mile untimed run immediately follows. All kids who participate will receive a medal. Students from Tusculum View Elementary School created original art awards for this year‘s 4-mile race. Awards are given to the Top Overall female and male,

winners of the Master, Grandmaster, and Senior Grandmaster divisions, and to the top four winners in each age category. Awards are given to the four largest teams with four or more members participating in any THE HOPE 4 event. All team members receive a special discount on registration. The Tusculum Police, Volunteer Fire Department, Tusculum College Security, and volunteers will be onhand to ensure a safe event for runners, walkers, and the community. Mail-in and online registration is now underway. For online registration, go to TheHOPE4.com. Early registration (guaranteed t-shirt) ends May 20. In-person registration and packet pickup will be held May 26 from 3-7 PM at American Greetings, 101 American Road in Afton, and at the event on May 29. Event-day registration and kid’s activities begin at 7:04 AM, with the race and walk starting at 8:04. The Kidz Run

4 Fun starts at 9:04, followed by an Awards Ceremony and door prizes at 9:34. Coordinated by The AG Wrappers, a Relay For Life team based at American Greetings, proceeds from THE HOPE 4 support the American Cancer Society. Since 2007, each year the AG Wrappers raise over $25,000 for the fight against cancer. The team received the American Cancer Society’s 2012 Stay Well Award in recognition of THE HOPE 4. Donations for The Hope Lodge Nashville will be accepted at early packet pickup on May 26 and at the race registration and finish line areas on May 29. Suggested items include toiletries and household goods (paper towels, cleaners, etc.). The Hope Lodge provides free housing to patients and caregivers during cancer treatment. For more information visit TheHOPE4.com, email moreinfo@TheHOPE4.com, or call (423) 636-2141.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Spotlight

- TUESDAY - May 23rd Stemwinder Rock’s Wood Fired Pizza & Grill From The Edge Holston River Brewing Company Downtown Country Jiggy Ray’s Pizzeria Open Mic Acoustic Coffeehouse The Dusty Travelers Elizabethton Farmers Market

- WEDNESDAY - May 24th Joe the Show Wild Wing Cafe Blacklite District w/ Clockwork Asylum The Hideaway Miss Ellie & Friends The Harvest Table Open Mic The Willow Tree Coffeehouse & Music Room Open Mic Jiggy Ray’s Pizzeria Community Center Acoustic Coffeehouse Drop Dead Dangerous Wild Wing Cafe

- THURSDAY - May 25th EC Frazier Model City Tap House Dallas Danger Holston River Brewing Company Aaron Lee Tasjan Abingdon Market Pavillion Open Mic Jiggy Ray’s Pizzeria Tokyo Rosenthal Bone Fire Smokehouse

- FRIDAY - May 26th Double Wide Inc. And Jackdaw’s 7 Capone’s Wise Old River Sleepy Owl Brewery Stone Creek 4 The Silver Spur Shooter Band Quaker Steak & Lube Southern Rebellion Sonny’s Cafe Under The Table Band Painter Creek Marina Chris Blake Our House Restaurant

If you or your band are playing in the upcoming week and would like to be in The Spotlight, call in advance to (423) 283-4324 or go online to: theloaferonline.com. Due to last minute cancellations or changes, please call the location to confirm.

- FRIDAY - May 26th AIA - Jimmey Buffett Tribute Band Twilight Alive Concert Series Jackdaw’s 7 with Double Wide Inc. Capone’s The SteelDrivers Down Home Mark Larkins CJ’s Sports Bar The Impaladors Jiggy Ray’s Pizzeria Coal Creek w/ Big Don Country Club Bar & Grill Brent Funkhouser Acoustic Coffeehouse Retroville Marker ‘2’ Grille Live Acoustic Evening with Trapt, Smile Empty Soul & A Toy Called God Holston River Brewing Company Brian Rigby Band Bristol Station Brews & Taproom Marshall Ballew Bone Fire Smokehouse

- SATURDAY - May 27th Alliez Capone’s Josiah Atchley & the Greater Good Wild Wing Cafe Kerosene Krush Rush Street Jet Black Audio The Hyperion Grill Fritz and Company Sleepy Owl Brewery Southern Boyz The Silver Spur Marcus Boyd Band Quaker Steak & Lube Shooter Band Hansonville Music Barn Nightshift Band RBAA Campground Victor Lawson / Catfish Frye (duo) Sonny’s Cafe Appalachian Strings David Thompson’s Produce Amethyst Kiah Model City Tap House Virginia National Guard Band Town of Marion Sundown Band Wilderness Trail Car Show

- SATURDAY - May 27th Borderline Band CJ’s Sports Bar Cambium Bristol VFW Post 6975 Lauren Cole Band Jiggy Ray’s Pizzeria Wyldeheart & Railway Express Country Club Bar & Grill Rick Yost Acoustic Coffeehouse Acoustifried Marker ‘2’ Grille Blowing Smoke Holston River Brewing Company Swamp Candy Bone Fire Smokehouse Mountain Park Old Time Band Carter Family Fold Rusty Steele Sonny’s Cafe

- SUNDAY - May 28th Rockin the docks for Charlie Benny Wilson / Ali Randolph & The Outta Luck Band Acoustifried / Railway Express Sonny’s Cafe Letters From Home Town of Marion Pickin’ in the Park Natural Tunnel State Park Andy Dale Petty / Chrysaora Acoustic Coffeehouse Ivy Road Marker ‘2’ Grille Mark Larkins Boone Lake Marina Momma Molasses Bone Fire Smokehouse

- MONDAY - May 29th Open Mic Acoustic Coffeehouse

- TUESDAY - May 30th Stemwinder Rock’s Wood Fired Pizza & Grill Downtown Country Jiggy Ray’s Pizzeria Asylum Suite Holston River Brewing Company

for show time & more details, visit

theloaferonline.com

CJ’S Sports Bar 516 Morelock St. Kingsport 423-390-1361

Model City Tap House 324 E Market St. Kingsport 423-765-0875

Bear's Bar 4460 Highway 421 Bristol TN 423-217-0442

Country Club Bar & Grill 3080 W State St Bristol 423-844-0400

Painter Creek Marina 766 Painter Creek Rd Bristol TN 423-878-5755

Bone Fire Smokehouse at the Hardware 260 W Main St Abingdon VA 276-623-0037

Country Club of Bristol 6045 Old Jonesboro Rd. Bristol 423-652-1700

Rock’s Wood Fired Pizza & Grill 3119 Bristol Hwy. Johnson City 423-262-0444

Holiday Inn (Exit 7) 3005 Linden Dr. Bristol VA 276-466-4100

Sonny’s Marina & Café 109 One Street Gray, TN 423-282-9440

Holston River Brewing Company 2621 Volunteer Pkwy Bristol TN

Studio Brew 221 Moore Street Bristol VA 423-360-3258

Boomershine's Pizza 4079 Highway 394 Bluff Cit 423-575-7500

KARAOKE

Bristol Station & Brews 41 Piedmont Avenue Bristol VA 276-608-1220

TUESDAY Karaoke w/ Tina and West at Dawg House Tavern Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Logans Karaoke with Top shelf Entertainment at Boomershine’s Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City TN *********************** WEDNESDAY Karaoke w/ Toddzilla at Sportsmans Pub Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke at American Legion 8pm Karaoke w/ DJ Marquez & Top Shelf Entertainment at Holston River Brewing Company Karaoke w/ DJ Brad & Top Shelf Entertainment at Quaker Steak & Lube Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Smokey Bones - Johnson City TN Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN *********************** THURSDAY Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Macado’s - Kingsport Karaoke at CJ’s Sports Bar Karaoke w/ Top Shelf Entertainment at Painter Creek Marina Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City TN Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at New Beginning’s Karaoke at Jiggy Rays Pizzaria ***********************

FRIDAY Karaoke w/ Southern Sounds Karaoke at Sportsman’s Bar & Grill 9pm Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Los Amigos Karaoke w/ Shane Rouse at Bear’s Bar Karaoke at Kingsport Moose Lodge Karaoke w/ Reverb Karaoke at The Cottage 8:30 pm Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN Karaoke w/ Toddzilla at Sportsmans Pub Karaoke at CJ’s Sports Bar Karaoke w/ DJ Brad & Top Shelf Entertainment at BoBo’s - Damascus VA Karaoke at Elizabethton VFW Karaoke w/ DJ Marquez & Top Shelf Entertainment at Holiday Inn (Exit 7) - Bristol VA Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Moe’s Original BBQ Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City TN *********************** SATURDAY Karaoke at The Horseshoe Lounge Karaoke w/ Toddzilla at Sportsmans Pub Karaoke at Kingsport Moose Lodge Turn the Page Karaoke at VFW Post 2108 - Johnson City TN Karaoke w/ Absolute Entertainment at Macado’s - Kingsport Karaoke at Numan’s - Johnson City TN ***********************

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SPOTLIGHT DIRECTORY

Acoustic Coffeehouse 415 W Walnut St. Johnson City 423-434-9872

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Leo Roars and Big Dipper Pours Into the Night

Y Stargazer

By Mark Marquette since 1996 stargazermarq@ gmail.com

It’s that time of Spring when Leo the Lion roars and the Big Dipper pours into the night. And the King of the planets dominates.

ou have to wait until well after 8:30 pm EDT for the stars to poke through the veil of night, but the wait is worth it as warm temperatures find us lingering outside and checking out the celestial sights. When it’s good and dark at 9 pm, golden Jupiter will catch your eye, with bright white star Spica below it. Directly overhead is the great lion of the sky, Leo, an ancient constellation that looks pretty much like a dot-to-dot lion. Leo is one of the oldest of the 88 constellations; many cultures for thousands of years have seen a crouching lion with a “regal” bright star, Regulus. The star pattern is a backward question mark (or cutting sickle) for his head and mane, dotted by the golden Regulus, and a right triangle for his hindquarters. Regulus lies at the lion’s heart. Known as “the regal one,” this multiple star system is a rather close 77 Light Years away. Regulus is two pairs of two stars in orbit about each other. This star and Leo have been significant to astrologers for millennia as the symbol of kings and empires before the real science of astronomy debunked any earthly connection with these randomly placed stars. Leo is filled with some classic galaxies that are easy to see in even small backyard telescopes. Though they look like grey smudges in amateur telescopes, photography reveals them as distant islands of stars. Many Spring constellations contain galaxies as we are now looking away from our own Milky Way Galaxy into the Universe. Looking north, the familiar seven stars of the Big Dipper are easy to see as if the bowl is pouring its contents onto the landscape below. The Big Dipper (or farm Plough, as it’s called in Europe), is an “asterism,” which is a familiar pattern within a whole constellation. The seven stars of the Big Dipper are actually related to each other— they were born together in a cluster that has spread apart over eons of time. They might have looked tightly together like The Pleiades cluster when dinosaurs roamed the Earth, 65 million years ago. The whole constellation of Ursa Major, the Great Bear, is huge (3rd largest of the 88 constellations), its fainter stars covering much of the

northern sky and making a shape like a lumbering bear. The Big Dipper is the hindquarter and tail of the bear. And that’s a puzzle. Nowhere on Earth today, or in the archeological records, is there a known bear with a long tail! Follow the arch of that tail, or dipper handle, and you will find Arcturus, a bright star known by that name for centuries. It is the brightest star in a kite or ice cream cone-shaped star pattern named after a man with a strange name—Bootes (pronounced BOO-oh-teez). Actually one of the oldest named constellations on record, he is a bear herder, keeping the Big Bear circling the celestial pole. The star distinctly orange Arcturus, third brightest in the Northern Hemisphere, was also known as the bear herder, and the entire constellation was centuries ago called Arcturus. There is an old stargazer axiom involving the Big Bear’s tail (or arc of the Big Dipper’s handle)… “arc to Arcturus, then speed on to Spica.” Following this curve across the high eastern sky will help you find the bright, white star of Virgo the Virgin, Spica. Virgo, the 2nd largest constellation, sprawls all over the sky and has no other really bright stars. How the ancients saw a woman is hard to imagine. Given the trait of purity, growth and abundance, Virgo was a symbol of the new life emerging from winter. Spica actually means sheath of wheat. But this Spring 2017, there is a brilliant, yellowish “star” above and to the right of Spica in the faint and small constellation of Libra the Scales—this is the king of the planets, Jupiter. The Zodiac is the band of constellations where the planets, Moon and Sun are always found. And Libra is the only non-animal of the 12 classic zodiacal star patterns. Virgo has hundreds of galaxies, including dozens in a famous “Virgo Cluster. Above Virgo—between Leo and Bootes—is the constellation named for the hair of an Egyptian Queen, Coma Berenices. It is a small, faint constellation, commemorating Queen Berenices and her flowing locks. There are dozens of easy to find galaxies in the borders of the queen’s “coma,” including a galaxy cluster 400 million Light Years away. There is plenty to see in the warm May evenings, so keep a watchful eye skyward as the celestial wonders unfold.

emorial Day weekend always gets people outside to the lakes and campgrounds of our beautiful Mountain Empire. And you’ll look up at some point after the twilight ends around 9 pm. Summer is officially four weeks away, and we are already experiencing the benefits of extended daylight to enjoy our outdoor activities.

Tuesday, May 23 The night above is open to the rest of the Universe like a window from our spaceship Earth. There are thousands of other galaxies to see beyond our own in Virgo, Leo, Ursa Major and other Spring constellations. On May evenings, the Milky Way is circling around the horizon, but next month (or after midnight) it will begin showing its glory above the eastern horizon. Wednesday, May 24 On this 1962 date in space history, Scott Carpenter, deceased, became the second American to orbit the Earth, duplicating the three orbits of John Glenn the previous February. Carpenter landed 250 miles off course in the Atlantic Ocean, taking 45 minutes to find in his life raft next to his Mercury capsule. NASA felt he became distracted by the busy mission, and he never flew in space again. But in 1965,

aboard Sealab II, he spent 28 days living on the ocean floor off the coast of California. Thursday, May 25 Today is New Moon, invisible in the daytime sky. But in just three more New Moons—Aug. 21st –The Great American Eclipse will be upon us! Friday, May 26 After midnight, the Milky Way begins to rise in the east, bringing with it the constellations of Summer. Leading the way is the bright star Vega, which will be the Pole Star in about 6,000 years, due to the wobble of the Earth’s axis, completing one complete circle every 26,000 years. That’s why the faint star Thuben in Draco was the Pole Star when the Egyptian pyramids were built.

Saturday, May 27 The crescent Moon is a beautiful sight above the western horizon in the twilight, setting the mood for a beautiful Saturday night. High in the east is the bright planet Saturn, and between are the constellations Cancer and Leo. Sunday, May 28 Many early morning risers will no doubt look to the eastern twilight and wonder what the brilliant ‘star’ is? Why it’s second planet Venus, drawing attention in the Spring mornings after dazzling our Winter evenings like a UFO. Monday, May 29 That bright star Arcturus can be found by following the Big Dipper’s handle, “arcing to Arcturus.” This distinctive orange star is 30 Light Years away, and it anchors the bottom point of the star pattern Bootes that looks like a kite, or an ice cream cone—or a diamond!

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THIS WEEK

SKIES

Celestial events in the skies for the week of May 23-29, 2017 as compiled for The Loafer by Mark D. Marquette.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

The Loved One in May

A pair of mid-1960s films make their blu-ray debut from Warner Archive this month, one of which boasts a script written by “Twilight Zone” creator Rod Serling, and the other a satire featuring Jonathan Winters in a dual role. Both films are shot in beautiful black and white, and on blu-ray their black and white cinematography really stands out. This week I’ll be talking about 1964’s “Seven Days in May” directed by John Frankenheimer, and Tony Richardson’s 1965 pitch black comedy “The Loved One.”

Batteries Not Included

By Andy Ross aross@ theloaferonline.com

even Days is May” is a political thriller set in the early 1970s, released in 1964. Directed by John Frankenheimer it’s his follow up to his other widely successful political thriller, 1962’s “The Manchurian Candidate.” “Seven Days” stars Burt Lancaster, Kirk Douglas, Fredric March, and Ava Gardner. Based off a 1962 novel of the same name “Seven Days in May” is about a popular general and Joint Chiefs of Staff Chairman (Lancaster) who is secretly planning a coup to overthrow the government and oust an unpopular President (March), unpopular for his pacifist views. A colonel who works for the Chairman (Douglas) starts to uncover the plan and brings it to the attention of the President. The novel was adapted for the screen by the perhaps the only writer in Hollywood perfect for the job, Rod Serling, whose legendary “Twilight Zone” went off the air the same year the film was released. Serling himself often said he felt burnout towards the end of the series, I’m sure he welcomed the chance to adapt the book. Serling and director Frankenheimer had worked together before back when each worked in TV on the popular anthology dramas of the 1950s like “Studio 90” and “Playhouse One.” It’s a great film, one of the true standouts of the decade, with everyone giving their best on screen. The movie was produced by Douglas’s production company Joel Productions, and was done so with encouragement from President John F. Kennedy--the film was due to come out in December 1963, but was pushed back after his assassination. Kennedy had read the book when it was published and strongly wished the film to be made-though the pentagon objected. Kennedy ran notes to the production through his Press Secretary, letting Frankenheimer know that if he wished to shoot outside of The White House, he would “coincidentally” arrange to

go on vacation. “Seven Days In May” is a film taht holds up tremendously, there’s even a boisterous TV news figure in the film--who staunchly backs the coup planning general--that is eerily close to some of the more bombastic voices one would find on cable news today. Warner Archive’s Blu-ray of “Seven Days In May” looks phenomenal. A new 2K scan of the film was made from original elements and it shows. This is one of those blu-rays that you should show to someone who says “I can’t watch things in black and white” and see if they feel the same way afterwards. The black and white adds to the story here--and is sharp as a tack. A very pleasant bonus feature on this bluray is a commentary track by director John Frankenheimer, which was recorded for the film’s DVD release in 1999, three years before Frankenheimer passed away. The blu-ray release of this film is a must, it’s a truly

Continued on page 43

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Old Souls Trio @ Acoustic Coffeehouse

Brent Funkhouser's theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

On Friday, May 26th at 8pm, eclectic folk and americana group Brent Funkhouser’s Old Souls Trio will be performing at the Acoustic Coffeehouse in Johnson City, TN.

nspired by such americana and folk pioneers as Ryan Adams, Gordon Lightfoot, and Jason Isbell, this group delivers a unique palette of original and cover songs. The band is on tour to promote Old Souls, Funkhouser’s debut album, scheduled for release on June 23rd. “Things Are Looking Up”, the first single from the album, is currently available on iTunes, Spotify, and most major streaming services. Hailing from the heart of the Shenandoah Valley, an area rich in folk traditions, Funkhouser grew up surrounded by music. On most any evening, acoustic musicians can be found in cafes, wineries, and porches around the valley. From childhood, music was a bonding experience for the Funkhouser family. Family gatherings often meant they’d attend concerts and play music together. On the weekend, the sounds of Tom Petty, the Allman Brothers, and the Marshall Tucker Band would fill the living room as family and friends gathered at the Funkhouser’s basement bar. It’s no surprise that Funkhouser’s music derives from these groups he grew up with. Listening to Old Souls, you can hear the influence of folk and rock pioneers of the 60’s and 70’s. Nods to modern americana and alt-country artists can be heard as well. Musical references to Wilco, Damien Jurado, and Brian Fallon make their way into the tracks, including a heartfelt cover of the latter’s song “Great Expectations”. The album is largely driven by the old folk-troubadour style of acoustic guitar and vocals, but also is filled with the sounds of keyboards, slide guitar, violin, and many other instruments. The Old Souls Trio features Seth Dublo on percussion, Katelyn Dill on violin, and Brent Funkhouser on guitar/vocals. The group is making stops in Johnson City, Asheville, and Charlotte. Funkhouser will be touring with The Old Souls Band in July, making another Johnson City stop at JRH Brewing Co. Come on out for a concert experience you can’t miss! Find out more about the band at www.brentfunkhousermusic. com. Look out for Old Souls, available June 23rd!

@ Carter Family Fold

Saturday, May 27th, 2017, at 7:30 p.m., the Carter Family Fold in Hiltons, Virginia, will present a concert by the Mountain Park Old Time Band. Admission to the concert is $10 for adults, children 6 to 11 $2, under age 6 free. Tickets are available at the door. Doors open at 6:00 p.m.

ountain Park Old Time Band was formed eight years ago as a group of friends who happened to enjoy old time music got together to have a good time. Over the past several years, the Mountain Park Old Time Band has been creating a stir in old time music circles. Mountain Park has five members, all of whom are very versatile and talented musicians. Nancy and Johnny Gentry played for years with the Whitetop Mountain Band. Johnny plays guitar, dobro, and fiddle as well as doing vocals for the band. Nancy drives the rhythm with her excellent bass playing. She and Johnny both teach music, and Johnny also makes beautiful banjos. Roger Stamper handles the fiddling for the group and he plays guitar and bass as well. C. T. Janney plays the washboard – an “instrument” rarely played today. C.T. also cuts a mean rug when he dances. Dr. Mark Handy plays banjo and does vocals – he’s also a champion clogger. When he’s not playing old time, Dr. Handy practices medicine in Abingdon, Virginia, and helps to run his family’s farm. In addition, he’s the newest member of the Carter Family Memorial Music Center’s Board of Directors. The Mountain Park Old Time Band has played at the Blue Ridge Music Center, the

Alleghany Jubilee, the Rex Theater, and at Bristol’s Rhythm and Roots Festival. They have also been featured on National Public Radio. The group has released two CDs – Fire on the Dance Floor and Dancing with Sally Goodin. Mountain Park has performed at previous Carter Family Festivals, and many other times at the Fold. Their group has very quickly become a Carter Fold favorite. For more information on the group, go to: http:// www.mountainparkoldtimeband.com/. Fans of groups like the Whitetop Mountain Band will love the Mountain Park Old Time Band. Be sure to bring your dancing shoes, and be ready for a night of down home fun. Nothing gets you out of your seat and on the dance floor faster than a rousing old time band. Don’t miss the Mountain Park Old Time Band at the Carter Family Fold! For more information on the group, go to: http:// www.mountainparkoldtimeband.com/. Carter Family Memorial Music Center, Incorporated, is a nonprofit, rural arts organization established to preserve traditional, acoustic, mountain music. For further information, go to www.carterfamilyfold.org or www.carterfamilyfold.com. For recorded information on upcoming shows at the Fold, call 276-386-6054.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Mountain Park Old Time Band

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Abby The Spoon Lady Tells her stories of riding the rails and busking

his will be the fifth "Abby" show that David Joe Miller has produced. The four previous shows have been presented to sold out audiences in Asheville, NC. Abby Roach is affectionately known as "The Spoon Lady" and with the coaching of storyteller/producer, David Joe Miller, she developed a show called "Salvation In Steel" where she tells the stories of her adventures and struggles of "hoboing" across America for eight years, busking from city to city to make ends meet. She finally landed in Asheville, NC. (by mistake) and has become a permanent fixture in the downtown street music scene referred to as busking. Three years ago Abby created the

On Wednesday, May 31st, David Joe Miller Presents WORD! at the McKinney Center in Jonesborough, TN. Featuring Abby The Spoon Lady, Asheville's most loved busker, along with her band The Fly By Night Rounders.

Asheville Buskers Collective in an effort to bring the busking community together and address concerns of downtown merchants and the Asheville police department regarding some of the busking acts becoming a hinderance to pedestrian and motor vehicle traffic in the congested and narrow, downtown Asheville streets. With Abby's guidance, acting as a liaison between the buskers, merchants and city officials, compromises were reached in forming new regulations for buskers that help to make the street entertainment experience safer for pedestrians and more palatable for downtown retailers. Abby is not only a great bridge builder, she's an extremely talented percussionist, playing the spoons and bells while accompanied by Vaden Landers and Chris Rodriquez on guitars and banjos as well as some incredible vocals. Their style of music is best described as "Old Timey Jug Band" as many of the songs they perform are from the 1920's-1940's and Vaden is happy to tell stories of those songs before they perform them. Don't be surprised though, if you hear a current and more familiar tune mixed in with other older ones. Abby is one of a very few professional spoon players in the United States and has been a professional street performer for well over a decade. She studied American folk percussion and music while traveling the country, by both foot and rail. She's now an internationally known street entertainer who has recently began playing in more traditional settings such as

festivals and event venues in the southeast. Abby's stories are raw, heart felt stories of her life on the road when she traveled from town to town, riding the rails and playing the spoons for a living. The name of the show, "Salvation In Steel," references the connection that the steel spoons and steel railroad tracks had in saving her from a life of despair, then setting her on a nationwide adventure that helped her to find music, rhythm and peace in playing the spoons for a living. Abby makes her home, just outside of Asheville in Weaverville, NC. but she can be found most every weekend, and most seasonable weekdays, on the streets of Asheville, NC. playing her spoons and attracting a large crowd of listeners and onlookers. You can learn more about Abby at: www. spoonladymusic.com David Joe is honored to bring Abby The Spoon Lady and the Fly By Night Rounders to the Storytelling Capital of the World. The show will take place at The McKinney Center, 103 Franklin Ave, just off East Main Street, in Jonesborough, TN. on Wednesday May 31st at 7pm. Doors will open for seating at 6:30 and tickets will be 12.00 online or 15.00 at the door. Tickets can be purchased in advance, online at: https://www.eventbrite. com/e/word-with-abby-the-spoon-lady-and-the-fly-by-nightrounders-tickets-33777956778 For more information, contact David Joe Miller at davidjoetells@ yahoo.com or visit http://www.storytellingcalendar.com/

The superhero take over of theaters has begun with the release of "Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2", the sequel to the 2014 original. Even though I am a comic book geek, I must confess before the release of the 2014 original I knew little about the Guardians. (Rated PG-13) 3 1 /2 guardians (out of 4)

Pop Life

By Ken Silvers ksilvers@ theloaferonline.com

certainly had seen pictures of them, but that was the extent of my knowledge of the space wondering crew. To me the Guardians are more "Star Wars" than Avengers due to their travels in the cosmos. If you saw the first film, all the wise-cracking characters are back: Peter Quill/ Star-Lord (Chris Pratt); Gamora (Zoe Saldana); Drax (Dave Bautista); Baby Groot (Vin Diesel); Rocket (Bradely Cooper). Also joining in the story are Yondu Udonta (Michael Rooker) and Nebula (Karen Gillan), sister of Gamora, and Mantis (Pom Klementieff). The jest of the story involves Peter finally meeting his father, Ego (Kurt Russell), and how his supposed dad is actually up to no good. Ego is actually a Celestial, a mysterious and ancient cosmic being, who in the film is seen in human form but is actually a "living planet". Got all that? We are talking a comic book movie after all. At the beginning of the movie the Guardians are fighting off a horrible monster bent on stealing valuable batteries from the Sovereign race (solid gold in appearance), in exchange for Gamora's estranged sister Nebula if they are victorious. During the course of the film the Guardians are separated a great deal, which is a weak point of the film as these characters function better when together. After all, what is better than seeing Drax hurl insults at Peter, and baby Groot hanging after all the Guardians. The plot gets a bit heavy-handed when Peter interacts with Ego, but I suppose there needs to be at least a bit of drama between all the insults and witty dialogue. The Guardians are provided plenty of opportunity to fight in space and on the ground, and the film moves at a steady pace. The Sovereign race in all their gold splendor provide a creepy touch with their too perfect looks and lifestyle. The film kept my attention throughout even though I, along with those not familiar with the comic book,

Continued on page 42

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Guardians of the Galaxy: Vol. 2

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

The strangeness Creates confusion Sometimes apprehension The familiarity Gives way to previous thoughts Previous situations Uncomfortable circumstances A complete one hundred and eighty degree turn Takes us away from what was

The Casual Word

By Langley Shazor Follow Langley at TheCasualWord

Leading only toward only what could be Being bound by what is A foundation set on solid ground We no longer live on sand We cannot be shaken And we will not be moved.Â So as strange as it feels Embrace the difference For soon enough, This will become the norm.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Look Ahead

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

The “Gathering in the Gap” Music Festival, scheduled for May 27 at the Southwest Virginia Museum Historical State Park, is a music festival celebrating the rich tradition of old-time, Americana and bluegrass music found in Southwest Virginia. Featuring performances, workshops, competitions, crafts, a children’s inflatables area, an annual quilt show and more, “Gathering in the Gap” captures the best of Southwest Virginia history and culture.

ntique, craft and food vendors will be on hand as well. The festival will also include an excellent main stage lineup—including Steep Canyon Rangers and Dave Eggar & Deoro. Tickets for the Gathering in the Gap Music Festival and its workshops are available through the Southwest Virginia Museum Historical State Park. Festival admission for adults ages 13 and over is $15.00 in advance or $20.00 if purchased the day of the event. Children 12 and under are free with paid adult admission. To purchase tickets, please call the park at 276-523-1322. You may also purchase tickets in person at the Southwest Virginia Museum Historical State Park during regular operating hours or online at www.gatheringinthegapmusicfestival.com. The award-winning Virginia State Parks are managed by the Virginia Department of Conservation and Recreation. For more information about Virginia State Parks’ activities and amenities or to make reservations in one of the more than 1,800 campsites or 300 climate-controlled cabins, call the Virginia State Parks Reservation Center at 800-933-PARK or visit www. virginiastateparks.gov.

“

Up to date entertainment in the area." Karen S.

We all have that one special place that feels like our own personal hideaway, a place to get away from the worries and angst of life. As a child, it may have been a backyard treehouse, or perhaps a secret fort behind the shrubs of the flower garden. Now it may be a hammock on an isolated beach, a secluded

Appalachian Wanderers

By Jason & Daniel Worley jdworley@ theloaferonline.com

corner in your favorite coffee shop, or a swing hidden in the woods. For many, the great outdoors offers all the comfort and solace we crave after a long week at the office. We can’t wait to get out in the wild and enjoy a secluded walk along our favorite trail or watch the sunrise from our favorite mountaintop.

utdoor recreation has been booming in the past several years, contributing billions to state and local economies near scenic areas. While the thought of millions of Americans enjoying the outdoors, exercising, and stimulating economic growth across the United States’ more rural areas is great, as with most things, it does also have a negative side. Many parks and national forests are pushed to the limit. Campgrounds are overflowing, trails erode due to overuse, and law enforcement is strapped. We find ourselves jostled through crowds just to try and snap a picture at scenic overlooks. What used to be a private sunset now is shared with a dozen others who light up the sky with the glow of their phones. While this is more than true of many of our national parks such as the Smokies or Grand Canyon, there are still those parks which harbor the sense of wonder and isolation the first explorers must have felt when they blazed the earliest trails across the nation. Obed National Wild and Scenic River is one of those special places. Here you can paddle for hours down waterways flowing untamed by navigation systems or dams without seeing another soul. Venture deep into the woods along the trails and hear nothing but the screech of eagles in the gorge below. Climb a route along the cliffs and feel nothing but the beating sun and the cool wind across your face. The Obed River flows from Crossville, Tennessee (located off I-40 on the way to Nashville) down into its namesake gorge on the edge of the Cumberland Plateau as it tumbles and roars its way to the Emory River. Framed by rock cliffs hundreds of feet high, the sandstone gorge is reminiscent of its slightlymore-famous neighbor to the north, Big South Fork. Here, however, the crowds are even thinner, the trails sparser, and the roads almost non-existent. National Wild and Scenic Rivers are a rare thing in the eastern states, with the majority of them existing in the wilds of large western territories such as Alaska, Oregon, and Idaho. Our state’s only entry into this national system was established by Congress and President Gerald Ford in 1976 and covers more than five thousand acres stretching across two counties. While this may sound like a small area, over forty-five miles of streams are protected within the national park’s boundaries. Much of the surrounding landscape is protected by the Catoosa Wildlife Management Area and the Cumberland Trail State Park.

Reaching the park is tricky, as there are only a few main roads which reach the gorge itself and provide a starting point for paddling treks. Your best bet is to first stop by the park’s only visitor center, located about twenty minutes away adjacent to the courthouse in downtown Wartburg. The small station is home to helpful rangers, several interpretive displays, and an area in which to watch the park’s beautiful video. If you’re unfamiliar with the area (as we were ourselves until recently) it’s definitely worth your while to watch it. You’ll surely be surprised at the abundance of things there are to discover in this little-known park. The park’s two main areas are easily accessed from downtown Wartburg, although they are a good thirty-minute drive from each other. TN 62 leads to the park’s northern spur along Clear Creek. Pull-offs along the river allow paddlers to launch from the Lilly Bluff Bridge and ply the waters down to its confluence with the Obed itself just a couple of miles away. A parking lot shortly after provides access to several hiking trails which lead to many scenic vistas. The Lilly Bluff Overlook is by far the best vantage point in the park for those seeking a memorable view. Venture beyond on the Point Trail, 1.9 miles of well-graded footpath which climbs through a smaller gorge, through beautiful forests, and past several geological features such as a spectacular stone arch. The rocky spires at the end make a secluded resting spot to enjoy the views and the wind. Catoosa Road leads from downtown to the Nemo Bridge area, home to the park’s only campground. This is where the park ends as the Obed empties its waters into the slightly larger Emory River, which is bound for Kingston and Watts Bar Lake beyond. The bridge makes a great spot to enjoy the view or fish. A picnic spot nearby is a great spot to enjoy a leisurely lunch after a stroll along the Emory River Nature Trail. This one-mile loop offers great scenes of the river and an up-close look at several species of rare wildflowers which grow in the area. Here also you can tackle two portions of the Cumberland Trail, the 2.6 Emory Gorge section, or the much longer Obed River section. Stretching over fourteen miles along the river’s south bank, the trail has been nicknamed “place of a thousand steps” due to the huge number of rock stairs one must ascend as it climbs up from the gorge.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Obed River

Big Train Show theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

The George L. Carter Railroad Museum at East Tennessee State University will host its second annual Big Train Show on Friday and Saturday, June 2-3, in the ETSU/Mountain States Health Alliance Athletic Center (the Mini-Dome).

tilizing more than 64,000 square feet of display space, the event will feature over 40 vendors displaying railroad and model railroad items on more than 200 tables. In addition, there will be nine model train layouts in multiple scales including operating live steam locomotives. Food booths will also be open. Train Show hours are 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. on Friday and 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. on Saturday. Admission is $5 per day and children under 12 years of age are admitted free. There will be free parking for patrons in the adjacent ETSU parking garage on the corner of State of Franklin Street and Jack Vest Drive. This popular family event returns for the second year on Blue Plum Festival weekend and is the largest train show in the region. The George L. Carter Railroad Museum will be open to the public both days from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. featuring model railroad layouts in three scales and four gauges. The railroad museum is located in the ETSU Campus Center Building at 176 Ross Drive and museum admission is free. For additional vendor and other train show information phone 423-753-6101 or visit www.memrr.org.

Pop Life continued from page 37 may have been lost at times, so I recommend taking an expert on the Guardians to the film with you. The highlight of the film for me was the often confused baby Groot, and the daring Rocket, a talking racoon, for those who are clueless about the character. With plenty of action, a plot twist here and there, and actors comfortable with their characters, leads this film to be par with the first film. I felt the film was trying too hard at times to ram as many jokes as possible into the film to please non-comic fans. While that is not a bad aspect, at some point the filmmakers need to reign back on the jokes just a bit. While all Marvel films contain a scene or scenes at the end of the film, this one contains 5, and nearly all of them left me confused if not for a good explanation from my friend Daniel. If you are looking for a fun "popcorn" flick, then take flight with the Guardians in their new adventure "Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2".

BATTERIES continued from page 32 1965 satire “The Loved One.” Produced by MGM in association with production company Filmways, MGM’s marketing department came up with a slogan for “The Loved One” which is one of the most factual slogans any Hollywood film has ever had. All the posters and advertising material for the film prominently featured the phrase “The motion picture with something to offend everyone!” “The Loved One” is a pitch black comedy based upon the novel by Evelyn Waugh, that satirizes Hollywood, sex, greed, religion, and the way the uniquely American

Funeral Industry operates. “The Loved One” has an great cast: Robert Morse, Jonathan Wintersplaying two different parts, Anjanette Comer, and then an even more amazing list of cameos by Dana Andrews, Milton Berle, James Coburn, Sir John Gielgud, Roddy McDowall, Tab Hunter, the great character actor Robert Morley, and even Liberace! Capping it all as the cherry on top is Rod Steiger, who is truly phenomenal as “Mr. Joyboy.” Morse plays an English poet who comes to America to visit his uncle, a legendary Hollywood Director (Gielgud). Shortly after his arrival,

the son of the boss the long-time studio home of the filmmaker lets him go, which leaves him despondent, eventually hanging himself. The young poet finds himself charged with making the arrangements, which leads him to Whispering Glades--an overly opulent cemetery ran by Reverend Wilbur Glenworthy--know to one and all as “The Blessed Reverend,” who only cares about the place as a money making enterprise. While planning his uncle’s services our poet meets one of the cosmeticians at Whispering Glades, a Ms. Thanatogenos (Comer), who he starts to take a fancy to. What’s incredible about “The Loved One” is that the film got made at all. It’d be hard to adapt it today, but that this was made by a major motion picture studio in 1965 is simply extraordinary. This was director Richardson’s follow up to his massively successful film “Tom Jones”--which was a huge hit at the box office and won an OSCAR for Best Picture, and Richardson one for Best Director. Hollywood gave

Richardson open invitations to do anything he desired for his follow up project, he took full advantage of that. The film was co-produced and shot by one of the true greats of cinematography, Haskell Wexler, who I’d say is also one of the true masters of black and white film. The film looks stunning, and this brand new blu-ray scan just knocks it out of the park. I watched the film last year and I thought to myself then “Boy, I wish this would come out on blu-ray, I bet it would look phenomenal!” My wish has come true, and Warner Archive has done this film justice. I noticed crisp detail that I had never seen before, particularly on Morse’s corduroy suit in the opening scene. “The Loved One” was a film ahead of its time, there’s a sequence in the middle of the film when Mr. Joyboy brings Ms. Thanatogenos home to meet his mother that’s practically John Waters before John Waters. When the completed film was screened for studio executives at MGM, a number of them were so taken aback and offended by the film--and it’s treatment of Hollywood in particular--that they walked out. Something that pleased Richardson to no end. There’s a great featurette on the disc about the making of the film--ported over from the DVD release. I can’t lie, this is one of my most favorite titles Warner Archive has done yet on blu-ray.I adore “The Loved One” so much. It’s so funny, so shockingly outrageous--even at times by today’s standards-that it just seems incredible this movie exists at all. If you’ve never seen “The Loved One” and you like Monty Python or “Dr. Strangelove” you need to get this blu-ray. You’ll be in for a most enjoyable evening. It’s an embarrassment of riches that Warner Archive has been putting out this year on blu-ray. I can’t wait to see what else they come up with as we get closer to the halfway mark of 2017. Both of these are HIGHLY recommended by yours truly, and would make a fine addition to anyone’s home library. Pick them both up and let me know what you think. See you next week.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

exceptional film and still manages to pack a wallop some 50 odd years after it was released. Pick this one up, you won’t regret it. Now let us turn our attentions to one of my most favorite films of the 1960s. There is so much to say when talking about Tony Richardson’s

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Jonesborough may be the storytelling capital of the world, but Ireland—the land of fairies, banshees, and ghosts—has to be the oral tradition’s spiritual home. Liz Weir, a Northern Ireland native who’s been telling stories for more than 40 years now, will bring a little of that magic to her upcoming residency at the International Storytelling Center (ISC), where she’ll share traditional tales, along with a few originals, during a week’s worth of live matinees.

eir will appear courtesy of ISC’s popular Storytelling Live! series, a unique program that brings some of the industry’s top talent to town for weeklong stints through the end of October. At home, Weir is the storyteller in residence for the entire library system of Northern Ireland, a network of 96 facilities. Over the last two years, she’s performed at 76 of them. But even when she’s home, Weir’s on storytelling duty as the proprietor of the Ballyeamon Barn, a hostel and local gathering spot for anyone who enjoys a tale well told. “It’s like the United Nations,” she says of her modern-day inn. “We’ve got backpackers and walking groups of people in their 50s, 60s, and 70s. You never know who’s going to be sitting around the table.” Weir has been performing in Jonesborough since 1996, and has welcomed many of her Tennessee friends to Ballyeamon over the years. The relatively long format of Storytelling Live! gives artists the chance to really settle in, as opposed to just stopping through. Weir describes working with ISC as like going home. “I love the Teller-in-Residency program because you’re really part of the community,” she says. “You’re walking up the street, talking to people. You’re going in and having coffee. The people in town are so welcoming. I really look forward to that.” In terms of history, though, even Tennessee’s oldest town has nothing on her homeland. “In Ireland, every building has a story to tell,” she observes.

“Every stone of every building has a story to tell. It’s just deeply ingrained in our psyche.” Throughout Weir’s weeklong residency, she’ll offer daily concerts, Tuesday through Saturday, May 30 – June 3 in the Mary B. Martin Storytelling Hall, on ISC’s downtown campus. All performances begin at 2:00 p.m. sharp. Reservations are strongly recommended. Storytelling Live! will bring a new storyteller to Jonesborough each week during its 2017 season, which extends a few weeks after the National Storytelling Festival. Tickets for matinee performances are just $12 for adults and $11 for seniors, students, and children under 18 for all performances. Ticketholders can present their ticket stubs for a 10 percent discount on same-day dining at JJ’s Eatery and Ice Cream or Main Street Café, two popular eateries in Jonesborough. Information about all performers, as well as a detailed schedule for 2017, is available at www.storytellingcenter.net. The International Storytelling Center is open 10 a.m. – 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday. For more information about Storytelling Live! or to make a group reservation, call (800) 952-8392 ext. 222 or (423) 913-1276.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Liz Weir Next Up for Storytelling Live!

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Bristol Ballet presentsWarriors, Legends, Bravery, Adventures, and Worldwide Travel

First, Travel to China and experience the legend of Mulan, the young lady who volunteered to take her father’s place in China’s war against invaders. Based on the Ballad of Mulan, which was first transcribed in the 6th century, the story has been popular not only in China, but worldwide.

his ballet is set to the score “Mulan – Ballet in Three Acts” by Joshua Chan, who composed it especially for the Hong Kong Ballet. Acquired directly from Mr. Chan, the beautiful music is a treasure for Bristol Ballet to have and to use. From her decision to go to war for her father, her time practicing to fight the invaders, the battles, to her victorious return home, this ballet will be inspirational to all. As a student concert involving ages 4 and up, there will be many memorable moments to see! In June, Bristol Ballet will be whisking you away to a place where the seas are nice and calm; a warm breeze is blowing; and the sun is shining at our “Moana” themed Summer Camps! Bristol Ballet invites all 3 – 9 year olds to join us at summer camps June 19-23. Campers will sing, dance, and make crafts at the Bristol Ballet Studios, located at 519 State Street. Camp for ages 3-6 will be held June 19-23 from 9:30am to 11:00am at a rate of $80 per week. Ages 7-9 will meet June 19-23 from 10:30am to 1:00pm at a rate of $120 per week. A Summer Intensive for intermediate to advanced dancers will be held June 12-17. Master Teachers J. Ryan Carroll and Lydia Haug will be guest instructors at the intensive. The intermediate intensive will meet from 10am – 3pm and the advanced will meet from 10am – 4:45pm. The intensive gives students the opportunity to refine existing technique, learn new concepts, and be challenged to reach for higher levels of proficiency and artistry. Conditioning, ballet, and Broadway jazz and modern dance will be the primary focus of the intensive. There will be a demonstration performance to conclude the week on Saturday, June 17. To register for our summer camps, or for more information about Mulan, The Legend, visit www.BristolBallet. org or call 276-669-6051.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

“Springtime Jubilee” Brings a Harmonious Welcome to the Season

LampLight’s Gospel Singing

LampLight Theatre is proud to 47 present its 9th bi-annual gospel singing since 2012. The Springtime Jubilee is sure to please the ear and lift the spirit!

his year, the choir of 65 local singers will lift your spirits with cherished gospel music like “If you Knew Him”, “If That Isn’t Love”, and “I Believe in a Hill Called Mount Calvary”. They will get your toes a-tapping with numbers like “Praying Man”, “Bread Upon the Water”, “I Never Shall Forget the Day”, and “Sweet Forgiveness”. Gifted soloists, trios, quartets, and a choir gathered from the region’s best singers and musicians hope to usher you into the throne room of heaven as they praise the Lord through this night of worship! The Springtime Jubilee will be performed Friday, June 2 and Saturday, June 3 at 7:00 p.m. at LampLight Theatre in Downtown Kingsport, 140 Broad Street Kingsport, TN 37660. Tickets are a suggested donation of $10 Adults, $5 Students, and FREE for children 5 & under. Reservations are strongly suggested and can be obtained by calling our Box Office at (423) 343-1766, Monday through Friday from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. or online at www.LampLightTheatre.com. Make it an evening you won’t forget by bringing your church group or date to Dinner in the elegant Emporium before the Friday night performance, June 2. The Emporium is located adjacent to the theatre and will provide a deliciously catered meal between 5:30pm and 7:00pm, when the performance begins. Reservations are required. Dinner & the performance are $30 per adult, $17 per student (ages 4-12), and free for children 0-3 years old.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

Answers on page 50

Judge is a 4 year old pit mix. He is neutered and up to date on all vaccines. This is the sweetest dog at the shelter according to the director and several volunteers. He has been at the shelter for awhile. Judge is such a loving dog who is so scared of storms. Please give him a loving home where he can finally feel safe.

Good Boy is a 4 year old Bull Terrier. He is neutered and up to date on all vaccines. This cutie has been at the shelter since it opened. He loves to play! His kennel mates have found homes! Please help him find his forever family!

May is half price adoption fees on large dogs and adult cats.

he Bridge Home has an ongoing aluminum can can collection in front of the shelter at 2061 Hwy 75 in Blountville,TN 37617. The cans are collected by a volunteer and the money from the aluminum goes towards badly needed food and supplies for the animals The Bridge Home No Kill Animal Rescue has started a pet food pantry for people that have had financial hardships because of job loss or medical problems and are struggling to feed their pet. They can come by the shelter and get cat or dog food to get through the tough time. Donations can be sent to The Bridge

Home Shelter PO Box 654 Blountville, TN 37617 Every animal in their care is spayed or neutered and fully vaccinated before being adopted. Being a non profit the shelter is funded entirely by membership dues and private donations. They always need volunteers or monetary donations. Other always needed items:pet food, cat litter & cat toys dog treats & dog toys,paper towels, cleaners, office supplies,Purina weight circles. Phone: 423-239-5237 Hours are Mon-Fri 12pm-6pm Sat 12pm3pm and Sun 2pm-4pm. Website is www. bridgehomerescue@gmail.com or like them on Facebook: www.Facebook.com/ bridgehome

49 theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

PETS

OF THE WEEK

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017

THINGS TO DO Blood Drive Marsh Regional Blood Center will conduct public blood drives at the area locations. Visit http:// tinyurl.com/n4aujx9 to find a location near you. In addition to scheduled blood drives, donors are welcome at Marsh Regional’s collection centers: 111 W. Stone Drive, Suite 300, Kingsport, 2428 Knob Creek Road, Johnson City and 1996 W. State St., Bristol. For more information about scheduling a blood drive at a local business, church, school or community organization, please call 423-408-7500, 423-652-0014 or 276-679-4669 or visit www. marshblood.com.

is welcome to attend and participate. Come drum, hoop/ holler, dance, or just relax and take in the scene, no experience or “talent” necessary. There are shared instruments and of course you can bring your own drums or percussion. It's all improvised, so there are no mistakes. We just smile and keep playing. Bring your own seating! ••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Gray Library Hosts Walk-In CPR Class The Washington County EMS will offer a walk- in CPR class from 12 to 2 p.m., May 31, at the Gray Branch Library. Library patrons are encouraged to come in and have a free hands-on demonstration of •••••••••••••••••••••••••• the proper CPR technique. This Senior Services seeking Zumba is open to all ages. The class will also be offered on June 21 from instructor Senior Services at Memorial 12 to 2 p.m.., at the Jonesborough Park Community Center, 510 Bert Library. Call the library at 477St., is seeking a Zumba instructor 1550 for more information. to teach classes on Tuesdays and •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Thursdays from 9:15-10:15 a.m., Computer Classes @ the May 16 through Aug. 10. Instructors are required to have Jonesborough Library current certifications in Zumba The Jonesborough Library or Zumba Gold and CPR and will offer computer classes on must carry liability insurance. Tuesdays at 2:00 p.m. in May: Please contact Lauren Fowler May 23 – E-Readers (CJ) at (423)461-4852 or lfowler@ May 30 – TEL Adult Learning johnsoncitytn.org for more Center: Internet Safety (Kayla) Our classes will be taught by information. Jonesborough Library staff. •••••••••••••••••••••••••• These classes are free and open Memorial Day Pro-Am Putt Putt to the public. Space is limited and Tournament at Kingsport Putt registration is required. To register, Putt 10:00pm. May 28th please call the Jonesborough Library at 753-1800. If you have a •••••••••••••••••••••••••• laptop or tablet, you are welcome JC Community Drum Circle to bring it. We are also looking The Johnson City Community for a computer savvy person who Drum Circle meets every is interested in volunteering to Wednesday evening (April – teach computer classes! If you October), 7pm - 8:30pm, inside are interested, please contact the Farmers’ Market Pavilion the Jonesborough Library at 753next to Founders Park. Everyone 1800.

4th Friday Dance Limited Edition will be playing our favorite fun dance music on the 4th Friday, May 26th, at the Jonesborough Visitors Center. This is one of the top bands in the area so if you have never visited this dance this is the one you won't want to miss! While the event is billed as a Ballroom Dance, a variety of music is played from the 50's, 60's and 70's that provides enjoyable dance opportunities for everyone...can you still do the Twist? Also, line dance lessons are offered at 6:30 and during the break, with the dance running from 7:00-10:00. Cost is only $6.00. For additional information call 423-952-0772. If you would like to receive a monthly email listing of local dances simply send an email request to tricitiesdanceinfo@ gmail.com. •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Bird Walks On Saturday, June 3, 2017 at 8:15 and 9:15, members of Birding Kingsport will lead bird walks in celebration of International Bird Migration Day. Both walks will start at Exchange Place, 4812 Orebank Road, Kingsport. When birds migrate, they stop at resource-rich and strategically

located sites. These sites are known as stop-over sites. Come learn about a stop-over site near your home and how you can help birds along the way. Walk participants should wear sturdy shoes suitable for walking in grass and on uneven ground. The less than one mile walks will last about fifty minutes and are free and suitable for all ages. Birding Kingsport, Fred J. Alsop Chapter of the Tennessee Ornithological Society, meets the 4th Tuesday of each month at 7:00 at the Downtown Kingsport Association, 229 Broad Street, Kingsport. For more information, email birdingkingsport@gmail.com or check out Birdingkingsport.org.

other. There will be food for sale and music provided by Jim Benelisha owner of the Acoustic Coffeehouse. The public is invited to meet and support groups doing interesting and important work in the Tri-Cities. Participating organizations and businesses are Shady Oaks Garden Club, the fair-trade-certified Artisans’ Village, Women’s Action Group, Carter County Democrat Women, PFLAG of the Tri-Cities, Moms Demand Action, Indivisible TriCities, Project Lorax, Shakti in the Mountains, Tri-Cities Transgender, Workers’ Alliance of Northeast TN, The Pride Center of the Tri-Cities, Northeast Tenn. People’s Movement, and the Democrat Resource Center. Individual vendors will also be •••••••••••••••••••••••••• setup. The Salvation Army will pay a visit from 2 PM -3 PM for Memorial Day Rummage Sale The Democrat Resource Center donations pickup at the end of is sponsoring and hosting a the event. multi-organization Memorial •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Day Weekend Rummage Sale/ Information event in the Colonial Memorial Day Rummage Sale Center Parking lot in front of the Senior Services at Memorial Park DRC at 2250 N. Roan Street on Community Center, 510 Bert St., will offer a free Senior Fitness Day Saturday, May 27, from 8-2. Local organizations and from 10 a.m.-noon on Thursday, businesses will be fundraising May 25 for ages 50 and older. and/or providing information Please pre-register at MPCC. For about their particular focuses more information, call (423)434as well as getting to know each 6237.

Cryptogram: But of all plagues, good Heaven, thy wrath can send, Save me, oh, save me, from the candid friend. DropQuote: "It is not the straining for great things that is most effective; it is the doing the little things, the common duties, a little better and better."

Is Spinning and Fidgeting Out of Control??

I have never regretted my twenty-eight-year decision to devote this column to the vast world of popular culture. If I had decided to devote it to, say, Things That Make Sense, I would have no doubt run out of ideas and material a long time ago.

Kelly’s Place

By Jim Kelly since 1989 jkelly@ theloaferonline.com

s it is, I am never am a loss for new stuff to write about, which brings us to this week’s topic: the new, and probably soon-tobecome-old Fidget Spinner craze that is sweeping/spinning the country/world. Thanks to my wife’s niece, Delilah Tallman (who on the verge of celebrating her 12th birthday), I am the proud owner of a glossy black fidget with an emoji center spinner. And just today I got word from Amazon that my new Batman spinner will be arriving in the next day or so. How cool is that? Although I have watched some of those inevitable YouTube videos about all the cool--and sometimes dangerous-tricks you can perform with these devices, I am perfectly content, however, just to sit around twirling my fidget between my thumb and forefinger. And I spend a lot of time just looking at it in its non-spinning state and feeling pleasantly trendy. Needless to say, a fidget spinner (or the related fidget button box) is more than just a toy, because it reflects some significant-and frivolous--cultural trends that go beyond its intended purpose. It is, as some would say, an “evocative object.” As my favorite essayist, Chuck Klosterman, writes in his justpublished new book, X: A HIGHLY SPECIFIC, DEFIANTLY INCOMPLETE HISTORY OF THE EARLY 21st CENTURY, we might “argue that the only reason any interesting story is ‘interesting’ is because it’s not actually about whatever it superficially appears to suggest, and that the only significant purpose of text is to provide a superstructure for subtext (which always matters more).” Yes, fidgets are fun but they are also useful in stimulating discussions about our lives today. Which is a worthwhile activity in itself. According to an article written by Clive Thompson for WIRED magazine, fidgeting is so hot right now because “it’s an adaptation to deskbound lifestyles. Society increasingly demands mental work while enforcing unhealthy, sedentary physical habits.” Fidgeting is thus “a way to cope.” And, Thompson believes fidgeting can actual make us smarter, which is an idea echoed in one of my Top 10 books, Steven Johnson’s EVERYTHING BAD IS GOOD FOR YOU: HOW TODAY’S POPULAR CULTURE IS ACTUALLY MAKING US SMARTER

(2006--which seems like such a long time ago). Pointing out that fidgeting is an old habit, as witnessed by those of us who twirl and tap pencils and crack our knuckles, Thompson observes that “maybe the boomlet in fidget items reveals a collective hunger for the pleasures of mechanical motion and tactility. Knitters and crocheters have always appreciated how their activity stills the mind; coders love clicky keyboards. Fidget Cube fans have discovered what these subcultures have always k n o w n .”

Further, a n d perhaps more significantly, we might be witnessing signs of what gaming experts Katherine Isbister and Michael Karlesky call an “evolving culture [because] it feels like people are developing a language of fidgeting.” Maybe I should learn that language for future KP columns! Needless to say, for every voice that sees these fidget devices in a positive light, there are ten others who see anything new as yet another sign that we are approaching the last days of civilization as we know it. As Chicago Tribune columnist Rex Huppke writes with his tongue planted firmly in his cheek (but no doubt capturing the rantings of those with a less-developed sense of humor), “. . . .every child [at school] has a fidget spinner and the entire building hums like a giant white noise machine. Some schools across the country . . . .have banned the gadgets, presumably out of fear that if all the children were to simultaneously spin their spinners in the same direction it would form a vortex that could wipe out half the city.” And, furthermore, “the Chinese military could overrun the West Coast and our children would be too distracted with their fidget spinners to notice anything, and we adults would be too distracted by our annoyance with fidget spinners to care. .

. .So I think it’s time, in the interest of America’s future, that we eradicate the spinner menace.” Sounds like something Sen. Joseph McCarthy might have said in 1952, doesn’t it? Seems like every new device develops a “creation myth” to go along with it, and fidgets have their own Book of Genesis to accompany their spinning (I hesitate to say “spinning their origins story”). Bloomberg writer Joshua Brustein recounts how fidgets have evolved from their original intended purpose as therapy devices for children affected by autism and ADHD to toys for the masses. The central, and somewhat tragic figure here is Catherine Hettinger, who let her patents for the device expire and now it not enjoying the financial fruits of her labor. Although she is unfortunately not profiting from these spinning devices, she is hoping that her newfound notoriety will help her carve out a new career for herself. We certainly wish her well. Stay tuned for “Fidget: The Musical” or the inevitable miniseries or reality show. And, as can be expected, there are new research reports beginning to crop up that show that using fidgets doesn’t make us any smarter or more able to cope with ADHD. Wynne Davis, writing for NPR, tells us that “in many places where fidget spinners are sold, they’re touted as miracle toys that help people focus as well as aid people dealing with post-traumatic stress and other disorders, but one expert says those claims aren’t backed up by science.” Of course, “one expert” doesn’t make an airtight case for anything. The jury is still out on this one, but expect lots more research--genuine and bogus--that tries to convince us one way or the other. Wonder if fidget spinners are having any effect on climate change? The one hopeful indicator, however, is the number of classroom teachers who are finding innovative ways of incorporating fidget spinners into their lesson plans. Maybe this will mean more fidgeting and less testing. We can only hope. Now that I’ve looked at fidget spinners from several angles, it’s time to bring this column to a close as a prepare for another thumb-andforefinger balancing session with my spinner. And, just think, by the time you are reading this I will be performing this balancing act with my new Batman spinner. See you next week unless I spin out of control.

theloaferonline.com | May 23, 2017