MOVE — Issue 14

MOVE THE

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N E V E S

YOUR

ENTERTAINMENT

S N A I C M USI

KINGS Doomtree sprouts from Minnesota roots

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01.20.12 VOLUME 10 ISSUE 14

+IN THIS ISSUE SHOW ME THE MOVIES Missouri goes Hollywood.

BABY GOT WHACK

Celebrities babies get stuck with crazy names (and a lot of money).

ANY GIVEN SATURDAY

Athletes try their hand at hosting SNL.

f o e l b a t s t n e t n o c

LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

MOVE 2012: So Fresh, So Clean

01.20.2012

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Athletes try to host SNL.

The history of film in the Show-Me State.

FROM KICKS TO SKITS YOU'RE SO VAIN

Oscar Wilde frowns on pride.

NEVER BEEN KISSED

Searching for that single smooch.

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SHOWS BEFORE BROS

Check out these 2012 concerts.

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UNDER THE LEATHER

A DOOMTREE GROWS IN 'SOTA

Rap collective brings vibes to CoMo,

SNOW PATROL STALLS

Irish band gets a little comfortable.

WORD 4 WORD

MISSOURI ON SCREEN

The latest fashion trends

ALL THAT GLITTERS

Golden Globes slump with safe Gervais

I'M BLUE (GOO GOO GAH)

Beyoncé and Jay-Z hop abord the weird baby name train.

MOVE asks 'What're you listening to?'

It seems as if everyone's New Year's resolution this year is to not make New Year's resolutions. America has all but given up on January self-improvement. And who can blame us? The typical resolution bullet points read like a laundry list of how to make your life suckish and boring: Eat salad.

Use the treadmill. Stop swearing. Fuck that! Cheeseburgers are delicious! (Jumbaco! Jumbaco!) And don't even get me started on treadmills. What America needs — you listening, Newt? — are some nifty new resolutions. ("Nifty" is the "swag" of 2012, if you didn't get the memo.)

And while you're working on your own list of revolutionary resolutions (might I suggest "climb Mt. Kilimanjaro" or "watch all five seasons of 'Friday Night Lights'"?), you can be sure to find all the niftiness your pre-2012 self so desperately craved here at your friendly neighborhood MOVE Magazine!

Sure, we're gonna continue to provide your weekly helpings of fresh coverage on the entertainment world, CoMo and beyond. But we've also got a few resolutions of our own.

We’re stepping our game up in terms of multimedia and online content. (Rap blogs and fashion vlogs and Pinterest pages, oh my!) Plus, we’re tweaking a few things to make sure MOVE is looking as sexy as ever. And we don’t need no stinkin’ treadmill to do it.

Oh, I’m Brandon Foster, by the way. (I’m the new MOVE editor, which is why they let me use so many parentheses.)

Happy 2012, everyone! Now, let’s get apocalyptic, why don’t we?

brandon foster | MOVE editor

Head to MOVE.THEMANEATER.COM to check out an audio slideshow of Thursday's Rascal Flatts concert.

2 MOVE • 12.09.11

/staff

move editor / brandon foster editor-in-chief / travis cornejo managing editor / abby spudich copy chief / kelsey maffett production manager / ashley lane photo editor / nick ehrhard designers/ ashley lane, savannah kannberg writers/ alex stewart, claire landsbaum, kayla elam, miles dobis, kristen herhold, alex zermeno, kristian mundahl, julia bush, kristin torres, david adams, emma woodhouse

KISSLESS IN COLUMBIA emma woodhouse

romance columnist

Lip lock and ...stop it!

MOVE’s anonymous Kissless in Columbia columnist embarks on her quest to share her inaugural smooch.

My “first kiss” was with a gay boy. I was 18 years old.

It was syllabus week of my first semester of college, and I just moved my wardrobe, library and bow collection into my residence hall. My parents already hugged me goodbye, and now my brand new, interesting friends and I were guests at our very first college party, dewy-eyed and entirely too excited.

The room was hardly crowded. About 12 or 15 people milled around the apartment, meeting for the first time or getting reacquainted after a long summer apart. My friend, who I already knew played for the other team, had been dancing with me since the party started and had been getting progressively more hands-on as the night wore on. “On the Floor” and other quality music blared in the background. He leaned toward me a little too quickly. Our lips touched.

“No, no, no!” I said as I pushed him back, half smiling. I tried to keep a straight face as I reminded him, “You aren’t into me. We’re just friends. You’re attracted to boys.” He smiled his cute, sloppy grin back at me and less than 30 seconds later had moved on to other, more interesting individuals, all of the male gender (I must be a good kisser. I think I made a real impression on him).

Upon reflection of “The Kiss Incident” the following morning, a consensus was reached that, because neither tongue nor consent was involved, I was still a kiss virgin.

This was bittersweet news for me. I had enjoyed an entire 12 hours of been-kissed enlightenment. I had eaten an apple with my kissed mouth and put ChapStick on kissed lips. Who had the right to take this away from me? Sexual orientation, attraction and love aside, it was still a kiss.

But alas, I agreed it was best not to count it. Better to have a real first kiss than one that means nothing, yadda yadda it’s romantic or whatever. So here I am, now 19, and I’ve still never been kissed. If I graduate from this place in the same condition, I’m asking for my own set of columns on the quad.

I had been almost-kissed prior to “The Kiss Incident” (by straight guys!). I might actually have racked up more almostkisses than the Duggars have children. There was that one time in the back of a red SUV. Then there was that other time on my bedroom floor and that time I dated a guy for three months and all we did was cuddle. At this point, I’m basically a champion at evading lips. Want some advice? I’ve got all the answers.

I’m a rare breed, joined only by an elite company of those who have never been kissed. Famous members include Drew Barrymore in that one movie (She was a journalist, too! Ohmygod we’re, like, the same person!), Steve Carell in that other movie and that heinous couple on the “Virgin Diaries” that waited until their wedding day to lock lips. Oh wait, I guess that means they’ve kissed, didn’t they. Damn.

Regardless, now I’m here with you to share my kiss-less life, every step of the way!

With this column, I intend to dish all the adventures of the unkissed — how much money I save on ChapStick (you would be surprised), what I do in my spare time (read books, man) and how I think babies are made. Just kidding, I know you get pregnant when you look at boys in swimsuits.

Seriously though, I’m excited to share my pursuit of my first kiss with you all, as well as the adventures I have along the way. Hopefully you will be entertained as my virgin lips are unleashed upon the world, and you will be my motivation to, by the end of these sixteen columns, have kissed a boy — for real this time.

MOVE HIGHLIGHTS

(ALBUM RELEASE) CRAIG FINN, CLEAR HEART FULL EYES RELEASE DATE: TUESDAY, JAN. 24

Players gon’ play: A brief history of athletes as SNL hosts

Barkley does a good job as SNL host — for an athlete.

“Saturday Night Live.” Those three words add up to a show that elicits laughter, pokes fun at popular culture and attracts audiences and celebrity hosts from across the nation. This show has been on air since 1975 and has had a total of 714 episodes, and though some of them do elicit the previously mentioned laughter, sometimes the episodes simply fall flat. However, basketball phenom Charles Barkley was hilarious as a third-time host of the popular NBC show.

The best episodes are the ones in which the host is able to poke fun at himself, and Barkley was able to do just that. One sketch mocked “Inside the NBA,” a show Barkley co-hosts. It was obvious the performers were on the brink of laughter themselves at times, and this was easily the funniest skit of the night and showed a funny, yet realistic, depiction of all the hosts, which are Barkley, Shaquille O’Neal, Ernie Johnson and Kenny Smith. The actors nailed this skit, and it felt as if it was an actual episode of “Inside the NBA” and not simply just a parody.

Although some skits were not as good as “Inside the NBA,” there were many others in which Barkley was perfect, such as “White People Problems” and a satirical commercial for a new game analysis by Barkley. Another standout in this episode was a commercial

making fun of the ridiculous amount of college football bowl games. However, many other skits fell flat, such as one in which Barkley was dressed as a woman and decided to come out to her husband and friends. But overall, Barkley was much better than expected, especially for someone whose profession is so different from acting.

Barkley is not the first athlete to have hosted the show. There are 34 others, which include Michael Phelps, Michael Jordan, Peyton Manning and Tom Brady.

Barkley is right in the middle of that list as far as humor and success on the show goes. Michael Jordan in 1991, as the first athlete host of the show, easily gave the greatest performance of any athlete thus far on the show. Although that was nearly 21 years ago, Jordan really set the bar high for future athlete hosts, something that has not yet been met.

The ever-popular swimmer Michael Phelps was an awful host in 2010. It could have been bad writing or it could have been bad acting, but the skits just were not that funny. That performance proved there’s a reason he never took up acting. Manning and Brady are on par with Barkley as hosts with some hilarious moments and some skits that were simply dumb.

It’s always a treat

when athletes become actors for just one night to host “Saturday Night Live,” and though some are great, many, many others are horrible. Yet, it’s still funny to watch them and their ability to make fun of themselves.

Now, I’m just waiting for Tim Tebow to host, which has been in talks recently.

Seeing a very serious athlete joke about himself will surely make for a memorable episode. kristen herhold | senior staff writer

Step away from the mirror claire landsbaum literary columnist Bringing books to (your) life.

A large pack of gossiping girls cuts through the quad. The girls’ ensembles all consist of sweatpants, Ugg boots and _full_ makeup. A boy sitting on a nearby bench looks up briefly from his existentialist novel. His large plastic-frame glasses (no lenses) slide down his nose, so he takes them off and wipes them on his obscure band T-shirt.

The only thing these two stereotypical subgroups have in common are the hours spent in front of a mirror every day before entering the public eye.

College students are more than a little concerned with appearance. Even the “throw-on-sweats-and-go-to-class” charade is a feeble attempt to disguise the true vanity of the young adult. In denial?

Consider the weekends: ages spent prepping for football games, outings and after-parties. Just admit it. You care.

Why? Because our society is transfixed by beauty. Beautiful people are sought-after and admired. The average

homely citizen can only hope to bask in the glow of a youthful and beautiful starlet—to capture some of that glow for himself.

In 1891 things were no different, and author Oscar Wilde capitalized on society’s weakness. “The Picture of Dorian Gray,” his novel, centers around an unusually attractive youth named (can you guess?) Dorian Gray.

Wilde remarks upon the ugly truth of such a society. The danger, he implies, is not that the homely seek to attain beauty, but that the beautiful can — and do — get away with murder simply because of their looks.

For Wilde, looks can’t compete with purity of soul.

Dorian, therefore, is depicted as both gorgeous and horribly sinful. He parties... _a lot_. He picks up women, stands up women and knocks up women. He is popular in every social circle and, most importantly, he is vain beyond all reason.

Vain individuals cannot bear to lose their looks, and Dorian is no exception.

Unfortunately for him, wrinkle creams and Botox were unheard of in the late 19th century. This is where the first half of the title — “The Picture of ” — comes into play.

With no available anti-aging product, Dorian does the next-best thing: he sells his soul to remain youthful and beautiful

(MOVIE RELEASE) 'THE ARTIST' OPENS: FRIDAY, JAN. 20 LOCATION: RAGTAG, 10 HITT ST.

forever. Cheerleaders, take note.

In a complex little bargain, Dorian manages to confer all negative signs of aging onto a portrait of himself. The painting, as opposed to his own precious face, will bear all the hallmarks of sin and age. He will remain forever young and angelic-looking while the painted Dorian grows old and repulsive in his place.

Solid effort, but it does little good in the end. Eternal damnation catches up with the unfortunate Dorian, as tends to happen.

Kids, don’t go selling your souls for eternal beauty. It isn’t worth it.

Wilde’s alarming tale makes this perfectly clear, particularly with the unveiling of Dorian’s transfigured portrait.

Nineteen years of misdeeds reveal themselves in grotesque disfigurements: rotten teeth, facial scars, maggots oozing from the forehead. Dorian’s black-aspitch soul manifest in a painting is not pretty at all.

Of course, there are those who figure it _is_ worth it. Those who would bargain with the devil, if they could. _Just my soul? A small price to pay for everlasting youth and looks. Bring it on_.

To you I say: good luck. Get a nice portrait done, and try exclaiming loudly into thin air that you wish it to grow old and hideous instead of you.

But first read Dorian’s sad sorry tale,

(ALBUM RELEASE) NADA SURF, THE STARS ARE INDIFFERENT TO ASTRONOMY RELEASE DATE: TUESDAY, JAN. 24

Hold Steady frontman Craig Finn is trying his wings at flying solo (don't worry, the band's not finished or anything), and what better way than with a lyrically literary album with a "Friday Night Lights"inspired title? No, seriously, what better way?

3 MOVE • 01.20.12

The silent, black-and-white flick that's sweeping the nation — not to mention the awards circuit — is now coming to Ragtag. Next time your parents start lecturing you about the glory days, you can ask them when, exactly, the last time was they saw a silent picture at the cinema.

Remember "Popular" (that 1996 spoken-word-high-school-survival-guide song that got surprisingly, um, popular)? Well, those guys are still going strong as 40-year-olds — this is their seventh release — dishing out good ol' reliable alt-rock with a little less angst and a little more grace.

mus life ic colu mni st

Not enough heat to melt the Snow Hailing from Bangor, Northern Ireland, Snow Patrol is often cast as a poor man’s Coldplay, and the similarities are noticeable — the earnest vocals, stadium trappings and a vast, echoed sound all recall the most successful rock band of the modern era. But to place Snow Patrol in this small niche is to both overstate its ambition and underrate its potential. The band’s latest release, Fallen Empires, is further proof.

Unlike Coldplay’s discography and career in general, Snow Patrol’s output has a remarkable consistency, no real highs and certainly no real lows. With the exception of the 2006 hit “Chasing Cars,” the group has kept a low radio profile yet has retained a substantial fan base. Listen to their recent greatest hits compilation and be surprised how many tunes spark your memory. But “Chasing Cars” was actually a departure from the group’s usual sound. A big, melodramatic piano ballad with the required stadium rock bombast thrown in, it’s an exception to the band’s rule of folksy strumming and slight electronic textures to a solid alt-rock base.

That rule is generally maintained and barely tweaked throughout Fallen Empires. The album is like a pleasant cloud, comfortable and unchallenging with some standout work. Here more than previous outings, keyboards and electronic textures take over as a supplement, and for the most part, they lend some bite and variety to Snow Patrol’s usually straightforward sonic output. The opener “I’ll Never Let Go” is an effective table-setter. Pulsating, murky electronic hums and a slow-building rumble build to r e v i e w a genuinely thrilling ending, but it’s almost a little too controlled. This SNOW is Fallen Empires in a microcosm — instrumentally assured, but somehow PATROL lacking the confidence to take any FALLEN EMPIRES real chances with the obviously fertile material. The sound is warm, rich of 5 and clean, but the songwriting — and perhaps attitude — prevent true rock catharsis from ever revealing itself. Take, for example, the guitar break on “The Weight of Love” that sounds for a second as if Nathan Connolly’s solo might thrillingly lose control, but it almost instantly sinks back into the background.

Sometimes this is not the case. The title track is refreshingly aggressive and involving, with edgy synths and clipped guitar stutters creating some real tension, and “In The End” has a guitar chug and drive that’s undeniably strong but never overpowering. The other noteworthy material is in the opposite vein, with the group and singer Gary Lightbody lying back and letting the songs build. “The Garden Rules” is a pleasant blend of strings and piano overdubs, whereas “Berlin” is a short, sweet instrumental that doesn’t have much development but (like everything else here) is pristine sounding.

Elsewhere, the group battles the forces of blandness that come up empty a little too often. “New York” goes for the big ballad but leaves little impression, “Those Distant Bells” creates an air of melancholy but goes nowhere with it and “The President” has all the elements for a great build-up closer and settle for atmospherics.

Perhaps the most unusual and unconventional cut here is the most telling. “The Symphony” uses its springy guitars and steady bass drum beats to create 6 minutes that are fully engaging but nothing more. It’s proof that Snow Patrol has the chops and subtlety to create a piece of work that sounds natural and clean but lacks either the ambition or confidence to use these elements and create something bolder and more challenging. Like all of Fallen Empires, “The Symphony” is a pleasant and comfortable warm-up to what might someday be a jam worthy of the scope Snow Patrol clearly relishes.

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Be sure to head to MOVE.THEMANEATER.COM to check out all our fancy new online/multimedia content including FASHION VIDEOS and our new-and-improved RAP and VIDEO GAME BLOGS.

4 MOVE • 01.20.12 01.19.12

Here comes the Doom «

Minnesota rap collective Doomtree brings its Twin Cities vibes to Columbia on Friday.

Hailing from the frigid streets of Minneapolis, Doomtree started out as a bunch of high school friends and has morphed into one of the most respected rap collectives in the Midwest. Using elements of punk, jazz and R&B, the group is known for its unorthodox beats and unavoidable crew mentality. Doomtree recently released its second studio album, No Kings, in November and is now blitzing the country on a 45-city concert tour, including a stop in Columbia on Friday.

MOVE recently caught up with Dessa, the lone female member of the Doomtree squad to talk No Kings, the logistics of a seven-person album and week-long concert blowouts.

[MOVE] Doomtree released No Kings just before Thanksgiving. How would you describe the sentiment of the album and the title, “No Kings”?

[Dessa] I think with so many writers that probably you’ll find five perspectives, one for every voice you hear on the album. That said, I think that No Kings, as a whole, has a lot to do with the rejection of the status quo, and the status quo involves a lot of hierarchy. Specifically, it’s about self-discrimination. It’s about rejecting any decrees from on high about how you’re supposed to live. It’s a hierarchy thing.

[MOVE] Are you happy with the way the album came out? Was it kind of what you were expecting all along?

[D] I don’t think that anybody, since the very beginning of the creative process, could have provided a concrete description about how this record was going to be at the end. In a lot of ways, this record included a lot of firsts, not having worked as collaboratively on anything as we have on No Kings.

[MOVE] How does Doomtree balance solo acts and collective efforts like No Kings? You guys are running all the time. If someone is recording an entirely separate album, how do you balance that?

[D] I think it’s pretty organic. We wanted to work together to make the record, and

we monitored the schedules of each solo member, looking for an opportunity to ferret out some time to work together. So, usually there’s a lot of talk about working on a collective album and we’ll talk and talk and talk for a couple years and then we’ll finally figure out a way to drag everybody to the same place.

artists at First Avenue music club for a week straight. How much fun was the special week-long blowout concert series?

[D] It was pretty awesome. You know, we haven’t undertaken anything on that scale before. And so, it wasn’t a sure bet that we’d be able to sell out each specific night, but we did, and it felt great.

[MOVE] During the release week, Doomtree drove around Minneapolis signing CDs and shirts out of a conversion van. How does the community outreach affect Doomtree’s success?

[D] I think it’s tough to correlate any human initiative. You know, I think it’s hard to tell what works and what doesn’t. You don’t know if somebody came to the show because their friend told them about it or because they saw it on Facebook or because they heard a DJ talk about it on the radio.

So you just do everything you can think of and at least some of it will work. I can’t say for sure how it affects our view in the Twin Cities — Doomtree piles into a conversion van driving around and handing out cookies— but I hope it does (help). And I think that it at least allows … us to get it out there. I appreciate it when artists are genuine and you have access to some of their real stuff. So I think we try to provide that.

[MOVE] Has the process of songwriting and getting together kind of changed now that pretty much every member has hit the national scene with successful solo acts?

[D] I think that it’s just the nature of the beast. It’s hard to write a whole album in the studio with five different songwriters.

Logistically, to get everybody to sound like we went in the same direction… It’s not easy with that many writers. But I think that this time, six years of trying paid off.

I mean, it’s a lot of practice and a process to get better.

[MOVE] The album was No. 1 in the Star Tribune’s yearly rollout and Minnesota’s 89.3 The Current is obsessed with it. How are the hometown Minnesota roots manifesting itself in the songwriting and the group in general?

[D] Well, Doomtree is proud to be from Minneapolis, and I don’t think we could ask for a better response. As for how that affects the songwriting, and I’m just speaking for myself, I think it’s dangerous to worry too much about how it will be received by the wider community and I think we focus more on trying to write the very best songs that we can. And then you worry about how it’ll be received by the critics.

[MOVE] Doomtree founded its own record label, Doomtree Records, and self-releases its own albums. Can you tell us a little about how that came to be?

[D] I think like 10 years ago, the guys decided that they were going to call themselves Doomtree, but they never really got around to deciding what that would mean. So, we’re a group of friends, we’re artists, and I think that’s exactly what our relationship is to one another. And when we needed a record label, we said, “Oh shit, OK. Let’s be a record label.” So maybe we could be a publishing house or something, we’d say, “Oh shit, I guess we’re a publishing house.” You know? So, I think we worried less about what we were called and worried more about what we could do with our art, if that makes sense.

[MOVE] Clearly 2011 was a landmark year for Doomtree. Is there anything planned for 2012, collective or solo?

[D] Well, next Thursday we’re heading out on a 45-city tour, so that’s pretty much six months right there.

[MOVE] In early December, each member of Doomtree hosted a night of music and

WORD

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“It reminds me of something I already know and love, but it has something new to add as well.” - Jack Tutko, freshman “It’s old, but it’s always really whimsical and uplifting.” Gabrielle Grosso, freshman

kristian mundahl | reporter

WORD

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Here at MOVE we’ve always got our headphones in. Be it the chart toppers, the classics or a mixtape from a friend down the hall, we’re always listening to something — and we assume you are, too. So we took to the streets (or quads, at least) and asked you what you’re jamming to — in your own words.

Now Playing

“Change” by Hey Ocean!

“Rope” by Foo Fighters “Float On” by Modest Mouse Anything by Hans Zimmer

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miles dobis

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CIRCLES

“It rocks, and I love how energetic the music gets me.” James Strassberger, sophomore “His stuff is easy to study to, and it is instrumental, so there are no words to distract you.” - Nicole Lunger, sophomore

MENU

compiled by alex zermeno

Missouri at the movies

Guns allegedly belonging to the infamous bank-robbing pair Bonnie and Clyde will go to auction Saturday, according to the Columbia Missourian. The couple, notorious during the Great Depression for holding up banks and convenience stores, was immortalized in the 1967 movie chronicling their escapades. Although the film greatly romanticized the events, it is fact the duo holed up in Joplin.

Let’s take a look at other movies with ties to the ShowMe State.

This film takes place in the Ozarks, where 17-year-old Ree Dolly learns her estranged father put up their house for his bail bond. Dolly pursues him in hopes of keeping the house, but first she must learn the truth about him through various shady family members and meth dealers. “Winter’s Bone” was nominated for four Academy Awards and was shot entirely on location in Christian and Taney counties.

Meet Me in St. Louis Up in the Air

The fabulous Judy Garland starred in this 1944 musical in her heyday. Set in 1903 St. Louis, “Meet Me in St. Louis” follows the Smiths, a well-off family with four beautiful daughters. Garland’s character, Esther, falls in love with the boy next door. Their courtship and romance hits a speed bump when Mr. Smith announces he has been offered a position in New York, causing the family to miss next year’s St. Louis World’s Fair.

Fever Pitch

Winter’s Bone Road House

This 1989 classic starring Patrick Swayze as James Dalton, a bouncer for roadside bar Double Deuce in Jasper, became an instant classic. This movie is based on the life of Norman “Storm” Cantwell, who is now a selfdefense trainer based in Kansas.

Filmed mostly in St. Louis (Lambert-St. Louis International Airport), this dramedy stars George Clooney as a professional company downsizer. It was filmed in St. Louis because it was one of the hardesthit cities in the recession. Jason Reitman, the director, wanted the firing scenes in the movie to be real, so he placed an ad in a local newspaper looking for people who were willing to talk about their job loss experiences.

Strangely, this romantic comedy about a Boston Red Sox fanatic, starring Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon, was filmed in St. Louis. It was kind of a slap in the face for Missourians, however, as the film featured footage of the Red Sox winning the World Series at the Cardinals’ Busch Stadium.

alex stewart | staff writer

Spring concerts to shower Columbia in 2012 The music scene in Columbia (and the surrounding area) brings a variety of talent, and this spring is no exception. From local folk quartet Mary & the Giant to Nickelodeon’s Drake Bell, 2012’s concert lineup looks just as diverse and exciting as ever. Here are a few of the most highly anticipated acts on their way to mid-Missouri.

← JANUARY 22 20 Doomtree: Mojo’s. Sort of hip-hop, kind of rap and a little bit punk, Doomtree takes the stage tonight, so hurry and grab your tickets.

Drake Bell: The Blue Note. Bell hasn’t released a full album since 2006, so here’s to hoping middle school hits, Nickelodeon and nostalgia are enough to sustain a show.

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Ravi Coltrane: Murry’s. If you don’t have the stomach for Bell’s angsty teen act, check out Coltrane, the saxophonist and son of jazz legend John Coltrane, as an alternative.

← FEBRUARY 02 01

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Badfish - A Tribute to Sublime: The Blue Note.

Calling all skateboarders and sunshine-lovers: Badfish is coming, and the band is bringing some summer with it.

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All-American Rejects: The Blue Note. If the Columbia music scene is good at anything, it’s making all my preteen dreams come true.

Mary & the Giant: The Blue Note. With what is sure to be a lively stringbased performance, this Columbia-based folk quartet will bring a bit of local flavor to the stage.

O.A.R.: The Blue Note. They peaked about a decade ago, but a performance right down the street from campus is almost too good to pass up.

julia bush | reporter

← MARCH 13 15 Dr. Dog: The Blue Note. A little indie and a little folksy, Dr. Dog has performed for the likes of Letterman and NPR but isn’t too much of a big-deal band to pass up a college town like Columbia.

← APRIL ← MAY 02 03 Childish Gambino: The Beaumont Club.

A sell-out for sure, this show should be an absolute blast and well worth the trip to Kansas City. As he says himself, “Gambino is a mastermind.”

Josh Abbott Band: The Blue Note. At $10, this show is inexpensive and right down the road.

However, the cowboy boots you’ll need to wear might jack up the cost.

Moonr unner: The Blue Note.

There’s nothing like a local band on a local stage to make Columbia feel like home.

M a t t Nathanson: The Blue Note.

Nathanson’s solo act in a smaller venue should make for an intimate atmosphere and a personal performance.

M83: The Pageant. The drive to St. Louis is easily justified by sure-tobe crazy lighting and the live version of “Midnight City,” that one song from the Victoria Secret fashion show. Oh, and a lot of other fantastic electropop.

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Mayday Parade & We the Kings: The Blue Note. Jam, cry and bang your head (possibly against the wall) while emo rock reaches a new level with the combined forces of these two.

01.20.12 • MOVE

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www.themaneater.com

M

Globes don’t shine Well, the 2012 Golden Globes have come and gone, and it’s pretty safe to say that the ceremony itself was largely ho-hum. Controversy-yielding host Ricky Gervais, though moderately funny, was entirely too nice to all of the stars in attendance this year. His opening monologue went after easy targets like Kim Kardashian and Justin Bieber. The old Gervais who would mock celebrities to their faces was largely absent. His jokes failed to get chuckles from such dead-faced stars as Leonardo Dicaprio, Elton John and, most surprisingly, Tina Fey. There was some great style and some not-so-great style on the red carpet, which is to be expected. Some of the best-dressed included the always stylish Emma Stone and Mila Kunis. Charlize Theron’s look was widely divisive, but her light pink dress combined with a silver headband made her look like a real-life princess.

Stars who missed the mark include Jessica Chastain, who was expected to be a fashion darling this season, but instead looked matronly and old-fashioned. The usually classy and glamorous Lea Michele looked completely out of her element in a silver metallic dress that was entirely too edgy for the squeaky clean “Glee” star.

As for the awards themselves, nothing came as too much of a surprise. Perennial awards favorites George Clooney and

Meryl Streep nabbed trophies for their dramatic work in “The Descendants” and “The Iron Lady,” respectively. “The Descendants” also took home the award for Best Motion Picture - Drama, making it a frontrunner in the Oscar race.

In the comedy field, “The Artist” won three awards: Best Motion Picture -Comedy or Musical, Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture - Comedy or Musical for its star Jean Dujardin and Best Original Score. One of the highlights of the entire ceremony occurred during the movie’s best picture win when its canine star Uggie joined his human cast and crew on stage.

Michelle Williams (“My Week With Marilyn”) took home the award for Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture - Comedy or Musical. While Williams was wonderful in the film, it’s a major stretch to call the film a comedy or a musical. Charlize Theron for “Young Adult” or Kristen Wiig for “Bridesmaids” would have proven to be much more worthy winners in the category.

Supporting Actor/Actress honors were given to Christopher Plummer for his incredible performance in “Beginners” and to Octavia Spencer for her emotional and spunky turn in “The Help.” Both actors should expect to return to the stage again on Oscar night.

The controversial Ricky Gervais disappoints in his return as host.

The TV awards were also largely predictable with top honors going to “Modern Family” and Showtime’s new breakout hit “Homeland.”

To make up for Ricky Gervais’ tame material, the stars themselves had to provide the shocks. Meryl Streep caused a bit of a stir when she was bleeped for saying “shit” after she realized she had forgotten her glasses. Her boozy, rambling speech where she acknowledged her fellow nominees and other great female performances was filled with mispronunciations but still managed to be the most entertaining moment of the ceremony.

George Clooney also caused a bit of a stir in his acceptance speech when he called out fellow nominee Michael Fassbender for appearing completely nude in his movie “Shame” by saying he could play golf with his hands behind his back. Unscripted and off-the-wall comments like these truly separate the Golden Globes from the stuffier and more formal Academy Awards.

All in all, the evening was largely inoffensive, and it was a bit of a disappointment to see Gervais go for cheap shots at stars that are already way over-discussed.

Hopefully next year’s ceremony will cause a stir again. david adams | staff writer

Celebrity name game «««

BILLBOARDD

The headline on US Weekly reads, “Why Did Beyoncé Name her Baby Blue Ivy?” It’s quite simple, really. Because she can.

It’s a fact of life that at some point in your life, sometime after selling millions of records and becoming an international superstar, then marrying another international superstar of equal or greater stature, that the idea of consulting a baby name book becomes itself unthinkable and pedestrian. You see, when a superstar and a superstar meet and fall in love, sometimes they join together in a sacred union and put out a collaborative effort. Whether that collaborative effort is a double album or another living and breathing being, the people demand that the end product has a cool name (Watch the Throne, anyone?).

We want to be reminded that celebrities are always cooler than us, better than us, and so rich that their future child doesn’t have to worry about being passed over for a job interview because his or her name is stupid. Being superstars—superstars with names like Beyoncé and Jay-Z, for the record—the couple simply couldn’t name their child “Caitlin” or “Amber.” Joining other celebrity babies like Jason Lee’s Pilot Inspektor, Gwyneth Paltrow’s Apple and Shannyn Sossamon’s Audio Science, as the heir to Beyoncé’s throne, Blue Ivy seems entirely appropriate. Modest, even. Perhaps they were simply giving the people what they wanted.

After the baby name announcement, Twitter erupted in deeply divided commentary. Was it Ivy Blue or Blue Ivy? What were the

Beyoncé and Jay-Z enjoy celebrity privilege of giving baby weird names. relative merits of either as a suitable name for a child? Wait, how isn’t that a street name for marijuana already? (Answer: According to a USA Today report, medical marijuana dispensaries in Hollywood have already named some product in her honor, so, at least now it is.) The commentary was accompanied by the inevitable dubious analysis and half-baked theories about the origins of the name, from claiming that “Ivy” came from the roman numeral IV—since the number four has significance to the couple, as they were both born on on the fourth and were married on the fourth—to suggesting that the name was a mix of the couples’ album titles, Jay-Z’s The Blueprint and Beyoncé’s 4. Take that in for a second, normal people. Chances are, none of us will ever be able to even flirt with the idea of naming our forthcoming offspring after an amalgamation of our certified platinum records.

Another winning analysis was the possibility that the name backwards, “Eulb Yvi” was Latin for “Satan’s Daughter,” a fact debunked in light of there being no mention of either word in the Latin dictionary. As much as we might love to believe one of America’s favorite celebrity couples have deeply infiltrated the Illuminati, the fact of the matter will probably reveal itself to be much simpler.

Beyoncé, Jay-Z and now Blue Ivy have more money than most of us will ever even aspire to—and they couldn’t care less what we think. kristin torres | senior staff writer

kayla elam

fashion columnist

The real college girl’s guide to leather I will try to refrain from going on incessantly about how it’s a new year i.e. new you, blah, blah, blah. (If you have been anywhere near a TV lately, then the Jenny Craig/Nutrisystem/Nicorette commercials already told you this in the most annoying ways possible.)

As clichéd as it may be, fashion is not exempt to those reinvention rules of a new year. And while the fashion world has moved on to photographing spring and designing next fall, college girls like us are left in the cold. Literally.

If you are looking for reinvention and a little warmth in preparation for the freezing weather mid-Missouri is bound to encounter this semester, look no further than leather. I know what you are probably thinking: leather? But put those Rooney Mara in The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo images away, because the real college girl’s way of wearing leather is not risqué or over-the-top at all. Just as with the majority of fashion trends, it is all about balance and moderation.

For daytime, think of leather as a neutral and remember that black is always a girl’s best friend. When Patrick Robinson revealed his fall/winter 2011 collection for the Gap, he even stated that he saw leather (which was heavily featured) “as the new denim.”

Robinson also offered the easiest way to wear leather for campus life when he paired a chunky knit sweater with a lightweight black leather pencil skirt. These contrasting textures result in an interesting, fashion-forward look, and by keeping both colors neutral, the resulting look is trendy not trashy. Forever 21, as usual, offers a cheaper version of what was shown on the runway by Phillip Lim and the Gap. If you pair the look with solid black tights and boots, you are class-ready.

Another easy way to wear leather for class is with a chic leather jacket. As classic as the look may be, it can be slightly tricky to execute, but a great cut and simple styling techniques can eliminate any hesitation that even the girliest of girls may have. I would choose a cropped or shrunken (read: avoid bulky) jacket in black (though neutral jackets will be a great addition to an upcoming spring wardrobe). Balance the toughness of the jacket with a girly dress. BB Dakota’s “Hyde” jacket has a feminine cut and is my pick for best leather jacket. (Charlotte Russe located in the mall or online also has a “Moto” jacket available that is cut superbly). The dress underneath can be floral, graphic print or solid. The beauty of a black jacket is that it goes with every color or print already in your closet. We are on a college budget after all!

(If you aren’t a skirt or dress girl, never underestimate the look of pairing skinny jeans and one of the jackets listed above. A white tee, jeans and a great jacket have been a chic model statement for years.)

Despite its “tough guy” stereotype, leather can also quickly transform to evening, which makes it a worthwhile purchase for a college student’s lifestyle. Valentino pre-fall 2011 has the right idea and pairs the leather trend with another hot trend that you can find at the mall or any boutique on Broadway: lace. (Chances are many of you have already purchased a lace item last season, so it is probably already in your closet.) This styling can be a lady-like lace dress and leather jacket, or you can take that leather pencil skirt and pair it with a lace top for an even edgier look. Another great thing about pairing these two fantastic fabrics together is that no other adornment is needed. With lace and leather, classic is best, so leave the glitter at home and avoid looking like you are trying too hard.

Bottom Line: balance. Rely on basics and try something new. After all, it is a new year (sorry, I had to).

FOREVER 21

MOVE HIGHLIGHTS

(CONCERT) DRAKE BELL

(ALBUM RELEASE) CHAIRLIFT, SOMETHING

TIME: 7 P.M. DATE: SUNDAY, JAN. 22 LOCATION: THE BLUE NOTE, 17 N. NINTH ST.

RELEASE DATE: TUESDAY, JAN. 24

That’s right, that Drake Bell. Apparently he wrote more tunes than just the “Drake & Josh” theme song, and he’s on tour to promote them. Although, you know he could play accordion Led Zeppelin covers, and you’d still go see him. Rumors of skinny Josh Peck opening are unconfirmed.

TOTAL FASHION MOVE

(VIDEO GAME RELEASE) SILENT HILL HD COLLECTION RELEASE DATE: TUESDAY, JAN. 24 PLATFORM: PS3, XBOX 360

This Brooklyn electropop duo had their cutesy cut “Bruises” featured in a 2008 iPod Nano commercial, so it’s obviously just a matter of time until they reach Feist-level fame. After working with Washed Out and Das Racist, this sophomore album might finally do the trick.

The critically-acclaimed “Silent Hill 2” and “Silent Hill 3” are available for the first time in high definition, so you can see every bit of of these psycho-horror games in crisp detail, just in case the film adaption didn’t do it for you — which, given the 29 percent rating on Rotten Tomatoes, it probably didn’t.

01.20.12 • MOVE

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