PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
99
LOOSE INK VII Ang Loose Ink ay ang opisyal na pampanitikang publikasyon ng The MARIAN, ang opisyal na pamahayagang pangkampus ng St. Mary’s University, Bayombong, Nueva Vizcaya. Reserbado ang karapatang-ari sa mga indibidwal na awtor ng mga akda sa isyung ito ng The MARIAN. Disenyo sa pabalat: The MARIAN Art Team Paglalapat sa pabalat: Jay Aromin © 2012
Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
PABALAT LOOSE INK VII
Literary CommitTee JOE ALLEN MARK ESTEBAN Editor-in-chief WILLETH JACINTO Literary Editor JAY AROMIN Chief Layout Artist MARC OLIVER FERNANDEZ Chief Artist
Editorial Board 2012-2013 Editor-in-chief Associate Editor Managing Editor News Editor Devcom Editor Features Editor Literary Editor Sports Editor Operations Manager Circulation and Communications Manager Chief Artist Chief Photojournalist Chief Layout Artist
Joe Allen Mark Esteban Freniel Mikko Austria Hazel Buctayon Lea Donna Divina Reynaly Mannag Samantha Chedrick Wallis Willeth Jacinto Ryan Pastolero Ellaine Marie Laureta Hajie Mariano Marc Oliver Fernandez Wrix Vinnlly Arzadon Jay Aromin
Senior Staff Writers Rhodora Aquino. Caselline Corpuz. Jan Mikhael Pating. Vanessa De Guzman. Ellen Grace Pe単a. Jaizybel Tanawe. Dan Reuel Viado. Angelica Roze Viloria. Sol Cielo Nuesca. Rochelle Gumih-o. Junior Staff Writers Ansherina Rose Arquero. Reynaldo Coloma. Emmanuel Jose. Jeremy Lopez. Den Mark Lorenzo. Earvin John Lucero. Razor Jan Mapa. Rosselle Sison. Senior Photojournalists Irene Ferrer Feiqueen Guinsatao John Frederick Guillarte Senior Layout Artist Joe Allen Mark Esteban
Junior Photojournalist Julius Gulayan Jr. Junior Layout Artists Marc Ryan Brosas Paul Anthony Danguilan
Junior Artists Mark Jefferson Marabe. Charles Arthemi Guarin. Milvin Manitchala. Junior Adviser Clara Mangolinchao-Gonzales
8
Senior Adviser John G. Tayaban
TAMIS NG KALIGAYAHAN, ASIM NG PIGHATI, ALAT NG PAGKABIGO AT PAIT NG DAMDAMING SAWI. TIKMAN ANG KATOTOHANANG NAKAKUBLI SA BAWAT LASA. LASAPIN. TALUPAN ANG BAWAT PAHINA.
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Nilalaman
Tula, Sanaysay, Maikling Kuwento Ansherina Rose Arquero 12) Daan 25) Picture it out 60) Himala Wrix Vinnlly Arzadon 10) Ekonomiya Vanessa De Guzman 10) Candy Man 22) Monologue Dialogue 60) Kending kadiri 60) Candy sucks Rochelle Gumih-o 11) The Robber Reynaly Mannag 11)Piso Ember 13) Talunan Ellen Grace Peña 14) Sillence Killed Me 18) 6 Minus 1 Plus 7 Equals Happiness 26) My Bestfriend’s Tears 51) Istoryang Tupo Tupo, Pambata ang Tagpo MJacupanv 15) Losing Distraction Leinad_zurcaled 35) Bitterness 36) Damsel in Disguise ECOD3 47) Naytendae 24) Untainted Nayr Nicopas 16) Rattan and Pillow 49) The Score Rhodora Aquino 24) Endless river Hajie Mariano 28)Foolish Heart 37) Three A.M. 37)Zombie
46) Trick or Treat Den Mark Lorenzo 32)Black Sitio Rosselle Sison 33)Wasted Relationship Jeremy Lopez 34) Abused 38) A Want Gone Wrong Angelica Abon 34)Almost Fearless Angelica Roze Viloria 23) Identity 23) Secret Tears 41) Mary’s Lamb Dan Reuel Viado 46) Abode of the Dead 47) Obra Maestra Lerkinz_13 48) Chapters Manilyn Manzano 49) Heaven Came Down EM 50) Sleep and Slumber Jan Mikhael Pating 53) Kwentong Upuan 54) Korniii II Mike Ely Chris Dumlao 58) The Kiss in My Dream 61) The Woo 222 59) Hopeless Romantic Earvin John Lucero 13) Homo 59) HOMO-sapiens October Faith 62) Rainfall on the Sixth of April Arelojaeklagmai’s 65) Impure Magnolias
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Nilalaman
Dibuho Marc Oliver Fernandez 68) Esther 69) Carcinoma 70) Abyss 70) Paper Rock Scissors Jay Aromin 71)Aquarius 72) Insiduous Paul Anthony Danguilan 73) Pinocchio Joe Allen Mark Esteban 74) Poso Willeth Jacinto 75) T-square
76) Vintage Lass 77) Unroofed Angelica Roze Viloria 78)Basiphobia Ariel Pascual 79) Untouched 80) Prismatic Strokes Kenneth Vince Sanchez 81) Accountability Milvin Manichala 82) Blackmail
Gatilyo Wrix Vinnlly Arzadon 84-88) The bitterness of man’s life and the sweetness of God’s love 96) Platoon 97) Off We Go Van Joseph De Guzman 89) Flying Dutchman 89) Lazy 90) Yamaha 92) Palayan Sol Cielo Nuesca 91) Oasis
91) You light up my world like nobody else Willeth Jacinto 92) Patay na ang kabayo 93) Titingala na lang ba? Ellaine Marie Laureta 94) Eulogy 95) Burlesque 95) Perched Feiqueen Guinsatao 96) Bright Lights
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Ekonomiya
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Idi punganay, sika’t naimula Nagtudo, imminit, ket nagsaringit Limmabas ti makatawen, Dimmakkel pagat-tumeng Dida nagsardeng Kenka ti panagtaraken, Mangrugi ka kuman nga pumateg Daksanggasat, bulbulong met maregreg Apay? Apay? Nilipatan daka? Kinaagum sa isu’t ragrangpaya.
Candy Man Your wrapper vivid Caught my eye Such enticing lush I couldn’t deny Your bubble gum oaths Popped and made me behold The tartar of truth Your cavity unfolds Your deceiving sweetness Once savored my foolish tongue But could tooth decay be undone? Oh politicians What a candy man!
10
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
The Robber When I was a child, I had a dream That I’d be great someday I had wished to cross rivers and mountains And soar up in the air Then one night, youth visited me And showed me the world was bright In parties and dances I had loved to be seen Because I was young, wild and free But one morning, I just woke up And discovered I’m young no more Where are my dreams when I was a child? I just can’t see them anymore.
Piso
O kay hirap mong mabuo ‘Di ko mahugot apat na sentimo Sa kumakalam kong bulsa, Sa’n ka nga ba dapat mapunta? Sa tiyan ko ba dahil ako ang naghirap O sa palad niyang humahagilap? Ngunit ‘di kita maaaring angkinin Mas kailangan ka ng mga gusgusin Mahirap mang tanggapin Masakit man sa ‘king saloobin Ikaw man ay isang kawatan, Sa kanila, ika’y matinding pangangailangan
11
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Daan …malaki man …o maliit …maluwang man …o masikip …basa man …o tuyo …diretso man …o baku – bako …tuwid man …o liko …iisa lamang ang patutunguhan nito.
12
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Talunan Alas tres y medya Sa madilim na umaga Kaluskos at kalabog Maya maya’y binasag na bintana Patak ng dugo Mula sa lamang nagli-lila Nginig ng katawan Tila di alintana Alak at pera Usok, batak - ligaya Sa silaw ng kandila Langit na para sa kanila.
Homo Who are you to cast me away? Have I caused you any problem today? Please do remember: I breathe the air that you breathe I stand on the ground under your feet.
13
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Silence Killed Me I know the truth, But I shut my mouth, I know it’s a lie, But I just end up with a sigh, I tried my best to tell them to stop those acts, But in front of them I don’t know how to react, I want to tell them it’s not the right path, But I don’t know how to say it without breaking their hearts, While I’m walking, People keep on staring, It seems like their eyes were saying, Come on tell us everything, My eyes saw what happened that day, My ears heard the noise coming from that place, But I tried to keep it for a long time, Until such time that innocent persons were trapped in those lies, Now those people keep on searching me, Before they’ll find me, I’ll make sure to end those lies, Through ending my life.
14
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Losing Distraction I haven't got any
distractions anymore. No more delusions. No more halluci-
nations. I'm back in the real world. Back to the sad and boring real world. Back to the emptiness of the heart, to the bland creativity of the mind. This anhedonic feeling makes me shiver inside. It's like losing attachment from a certain kind of drug. It's like dissociating or more like depersonalizing. i don't exactly know if i lost you or you lost me. Either way, the same empty feeling is emerging in my blood. drowning every possibility of hope and happiness. i am not depressed or worried sick. I'd like to think i am not. This whole crazy idea keeps bugging me that I'm more sick now than the times that I still had you. You see, i can only be happy when I'm with you. But you're not here anymore. You're not here to cloud my mind with distinct inappropriateness of solemn fun that lives inside my head.
intoxicating yet frustrating kind of love. hypnotic asylum. i miss the white comfortable feeling of your four-cornered room that gently assures me that i am with you. i miss your quiet whisper that blows like a wind in my ears caressing all my fears and worries. i miss your innate nature of distracting my mind with pleasurable awkwardness of make-up dreams. I know this love is difficult because you can't stay anymore. You can't stay because I’m not sick anymore. Why those selfish medicines and sarcastically concerned white friends made me believe that your seductive fun is forbidden and should never be explored. I regret, my love. I shouldn't have believed them. They tricked me! i should have known. i am sorry. Right now i want you to know that you are my reality even if this love is schizophrenic. They say I'm healed but... God, they don't know that losing distraction is worst than being insane. You're not here to fill my lonely heart with Oh! How i wish i could go back to your
15
PABALAT “Rattan and Pillow”
The Marian Loose Ink VII
“Rattan! Rattan! Basket! Bag!” shouts a tall man with skin like that of a common man in the street full of clamors coming from a construction site. The man is simple yet he exudes a soothing look and personality which can hardly be seen in a common person like him. Bangloy crossed the street to approach a group of people who seemed to have a gathering. “Rattan products?” Bangloy asked respectfully. Then a man in a corporate attire with black shiny shoes like of a bank manager stood on the ground. He is Renato, the son of the most influential man in the area, Don Iñego. “Can I check your product, poor boy?” an arrogant Renato said to him. Bangloy confidently dropped the rattan on the ground. Renato held a rattan bag, lifted it and let the product fly in the air directly to the poor man’s face. The crowd grew silent. The man smiled like a thief. Bangloy, without any reaction, walked out, with his towel trying to wipe the sweat flowing from his face. Perhaps, if he would fight, he knows that the people of their village will help in his execution upon the command of Don Iñego. Yet, his heart secretly jumped with joy since he knows that the arrogant man is again jealous. Who would imagine that the fattest girl in their village who also belongs to the richest family would fall in love with him? Don Fortunato, Doña Felicita and their daughter Grace is the richest family in the village. They hold the lives of many people after making many villagers their servants in the fulfillment of building a supermarket in their town. Grace, since childhood, is a healthy girl. She is often dubbed in their village with the name, “Piggy or Gracia,” because of her interest in food. But people can’t understand why a change seemed to occur in her body physique since she fell in love with Bangloy. A hut stood in the center of the field welcomed the tired Bangloy. He was thinking of the people in the village, the construction site and its possible fulfillment. He was reflecting when a scream disrupted his concentration. “Marlo, Marlo, are you there?” Victoria shouted in a hurried voice. She is the daughter of the most dedicated servant of Don Fortunato. Victoria also admires Marlo – Bangloy in his village name. Bangloy peeped out from the window to see Victoria. “Why?” said the disturbed man. “There is again a commotion in the construction site. We need to go there because some servants are again being maltreated by Don Fortunato’s men.” “Why should I?” said Bangloy. But he knows that Grace, her dream girl is there. She opened the door and ran with Victoria 200 meters away to the construction site. They could now see the crowd and the body of a dead servant, wrinkled lips with a wrecked visage caused by hard punches. Sad face. Depression is in the eyes of the man. Standing beside the limousine is a crying lady. Grace, in the first place, is against the will of her parents. She approached Bangloy sitting on a bark of a tree, reflecting. “I’m sorry,” Grace said to Bangloy. The man is still silent. A face fresh from astonishment. “It’s not your fault. It is my fault, for I didn’t do something to save the servant,” said Bangloy. “You are a hero. You always think of people not for yourself. It makes me realize how blessed I am to have you in my life. And...” Bangloy held his finger to Grace lips. “Stop it! I don’t want to hear your other words. It reminds me of our standing in life. You are a pillow, yet I am just like a rattan. I can’t believe you fell in love with me. I can’t believe myself that I learned how to love you more than my life.” Grace’s world is shining. The birds are chirping. But clasps stopped the momentum.
16
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Don Fortunato was showing his killing brows to the lovers. Grace couldn’t think of something to do but to leave Bangloy. The lady ran to the limousine. The screeching sound started. The poor man was left alone. The sun rose from the east. The village was again busy. There were again noises coming from the construction site. The poor man started to clutch the rattans when a voice entered his nipa hut. The sobbing voice seemed to be familiar. “Bangloy! Please open your door,” the voice said. Bangloy confidently walked to the door and opened it. “Let’s leave the village now. I want to be with you. I don’t want to be under my father’s rule! I don’t want to enter a family full of pressure! I want to be the real me!” Grace said to Bangloy hugging him like a child longing for genuine comfort. “My family is going to fix a marriage between me and Renato tonight. I don’t want that arrogant man. I don’t want his family. I only want you in my life. I don’t want to be full of regrets for the rest of my life.” Bangloy was speechless. He was so afraid. He felt like his mind was going to burst because he couldn’t think of the right thing to do. “But, Grace, where would we go? There’s no place for us to stay. Your father is so powerful that he can always find us. I love you but...” “Please, Bangloy. Anywhere. I am ready to exchange my life from pillows to rattan just to be with you. Please,” the crying lady held Bangloy’s hands. Her hands were cold like ice or frosty water. Bangloy tightly held Grace’s hands. He knew that it is definitely hard for a twentyfour year old poor man like him to feed a rich lady like Grace. But his pulse was opposite to what he was scared of. He knows that Grace is his life. He dreamt for this day to come. He dreamt for Grace to be his real life partner. Without regrets, he called for Caloy, his only neighbor and bestfriend to meet them at the nearest bus station. The screeching sound started. Don Fortunato’s men were searching the nearby towns to find the couple. The Don is so disappointed with his only child. He was so depressed that he didn’t know what is already happening in their properties. The door of his room started to open. “The construction site is burning!” Doña Felicita exclaimed upon entering the Don’s room. The heartless Don started to shout. He couldn’t think right. He was like an insane man shouting in his own mansion. “Who could do this to me? He will pay for it. My plans are all wrecked. My properties are all there. I...I... can’t....” His heart was pounding so fast. He felt his blood flowing from his head down to his neck. He can’t breathe. He can’t move. All were empty. He can no longer utter a word. His body, paralyzed. Bangloy lifted up in his hands a child laughing like a doll. He was so happy kissing his lovely daughter. He thought of her tantalizing eyes and rosy cheeks which were all like his wife’s. Footsteps from the balcony were approaching them in the garden. Grace was smiling holding a big dining plate including a jar of fruit juice and loaf bread. Bangloy would think of his sacrifices for his family. Who would believe that from selling rattan products in the day and working in a pillow factory at night will make him give a comfortable life to his family? Who would believe that a poor man who courageously sought for an unknown destiny of saving and being with his dream girl is now a man full of self-fulfillment? “Thanks, Grace. I love you so much,” he whispered to his wife as they watched their daughter playing with her doll house. “This is our first gift to Luigi. And I know that as we rear her full of lessons, she would find a way to make this doll house into reality. I love you more, my man.”
17
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
6 Minus 1 Plus 7 Equals Happiness “How are you? You’re now too old. Why don’t you give us the chance to take your role in the family? In fact, for almost 11 years I think you have no space in this house anymore for mother bought us to take your role.” “I’m great, and yes we’re old but we can still give our service to this family. If they are taking us for granted, why is it that we still feel the hope that they will go back in this house and sit among us even just for a while. Mother bought you not because you’ll replace us. We believe that mother just wanted us to rest for the meantime, because she reserves us for the family we had been giving our service for a long time.” “Oh! How am I supposed to react to that wrong notion? You’re useless now. Why don’t you give up the hope in your heart? Do you want me to tell you everything that can change your optimistic point of view on your impossible dream? The old family you’re telling will never come back in this house, they have their own lives now. Sorry to say but they have already forgotten you. I’m so sad for you.” “Let’s see, I know that God still wants us to be happy. Before we give you the right to take our task, allow us to experience again the things we’ve experienced when the head of the family is still alive.” “I think your wish will never happen again. It’s too bad you’re expecting something that would never happen. Look at you, you’re not complete anymore. The chair of the father has been destroyed three years after he died, right?” Those were the dialogues I imagined from the leaders of our two sets of chairs, the old rattan chairs and the new sets of wooden chairs, as I stared at the dining table around 10 o’clock in the evening last October 30, 2012. My heart doesn’t want to lose hope. I still imagine the old family laughing together, telling stories to each other, treasuring the memories of forever while sitting on our favorite chairs, but then, I’m still having that doubt if those events would still happen. I slept that night having mixed emotions. I am hoping to have a sweet dream, a dream which will turn back time when all the members of the family are sitting on those old chairs, those times when Papa was teasing Mama, my sisters telling their dreams saying “Hey, I have better dreams than you. I’ll be a great teacher in the future, huh!” “You can never beat me. My dream is greater than yours. I’ll be a good doctor, a dentist or even an engineer. See how great I am.” At seven o’clock in the morning, October 31, 2012, the phone of
18
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Mama rang. “Hey, your ate is calling,” she said. After their conversation, my mama spilled the good news that my sisters, nephews and nieces are coming today. After hearing the news, I went to my favorite old chair and sat on it. While looking at the other old chairs, I thought, “I think our dreams came true. They remember us. They will come home for us.” “See! I told you they are not taking us for granted, for the family which happened to enjoy our service is here again.” “Let’s see, I think they will not sit among you, for you are not attractive anymore just like before. Look at us! If they will see the two of us, we will immediately catch their attention.” It’s now 4 o’clock in the afternoon. As I was reminiscing our happy moments, I told myself that God and Papa made a way for us to be with each other again. “Ellen, they’re here,” mom said when a jeepney stopped in front of our house. My three sisters and their families were there. Dinner time. My sisters sat on the old chairs. “I missed these chairs,” my eldest sister said while looking at the old chairs. “Yeah me too, after 11 years they’re still here. I thought they are not functional anymore,”my other two sisters added. The members of the family who used to sit on the old chairs before, sat on them once more. And the new members of the family sat among the new chairs mama bought. While eating our meal, we reminisced our happy moments together. The dinner was filled with different stories which happened after April 21, 2001, before my father died, the last day when we had our last meal together while sitting on the old chairs. I looked at the two sets of chairs as I was fixing the table for lunch the next day. “Yes, we lost one but then seven were added in the family. We were surprised when all the members of the family visited us this holiday. You haven’t got our role in the family because you still have another role inside this house,right?” “Yeah, maybe.” After my father died, there were lots of things that happened in our life. And all I thought, these things will be the reasons for us to say goodbye to happiness. But I was wrong.
19
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Monologue Dialogue Between he and she is a transparent mirror He looked at her but she didn’t look back He: I’m sorry I forgot you. She: How can you forget if you never even remembered? He: I’m sorry I didn’t hear your heart. She: How can you hear if you have never even listened? He: I’m sorry for this tragic love story. She: How can it be a love story if you never even loved me? He: I’m really sorry, goodbye. She: How can you say goodbye when I’m already gone. . . And through the transparent mirror, she couldn’t look back.
22
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Identity How can nobody like me Dreamt of being somebody When I already found someone But treats me like no one. That’s my identity I’m someone’s nobody
Secret Tears
It’s been a while Since I really smiled In my lips is happiness But in my eyes is sadness
Physically, I’m alive But emotionally, I’m torn apart Everybody knows I’m happy But no one can see my agony I hope you can see What’s inside me I hope you can feel the pain you caused me You gave me love That no one can steal But you gave me pain That no one can heal ‘Coz behind those smiles Is pain I keep inside
23
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Endless River I once thought of letting go, as waters continuously flow. 'Cause giving up is easy, and it’s hard to always worry.
You're one of a kind, a pearl on the sand. I'm just a common stone, only meant to be thrown. Trying hard to gyp my heart, that we'll meet at some part. But you’re the water in the endless river... never staying, always moving far away from me.
Untainted
Fragrance Of thy love I smell
Your smile, So sweet and divine. O Loving Mother So pure and tender. And so I say, Thank You, You hear us pray.
24
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Picture it Out It was so quiet. I could feel the cold breeze of air that touches my cheeks. The only thing I could hear is the stamp of my feet on the ground as I come nearer to our house. I approached my mother and gave her a kiss. She looked sad and miserable. I asked her why but she did not say any single word. She just held my hands and walked away. I saw my father sitting on the sofa; I came to him and gave him a hug. I asked him why mother looked sad. He just sighed and stood up. I saw my younger sister staring at my graduation picture. “Hey baby! Why are you looking at my picture? I’m already here. Just look at me. Do you want to play? Come, I have something for you. You’ll love it for sure.” She just looked at me for how many seconds then she continued staring at my photo. I felt so sad. It feels like I have done something wrong unknowingly. We were happy for the past days. We even went to a beach and had some fun and bonding moments. We used to share one’s care and love. We giggled, played and laughed together as if it’s the end of the world. Ding-dong! Ding-dong! That was the doorbell. My mother quickly opened the door. Tears started to stream down her face. “Oh, my God! This is not happening!” My father approached her and he hugged her very tight to stop her from crying even louder. I want to go near them but I can’t move. It feels like the ground is eating me. I can’t help myself from shedding tears when I saw the divers carrying a dead man’s body covered in white blanket. “Sir, Ma’am, natagpuan na po namin siya.” When one of the divers lifted up the blanket, I cried harder. I can’t breathe anymore. The man is the one who is in the picture which my younger sister is staring at.
25
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
My Bestfriend’s Tears It’s hard to believe that we became bestfriends. We are the total opposite of one another-from our attitude, to the things we love and like to do. She’s a girl who can’t stand on her own, she always needs someone to lean on. She’s weak to face her own problems. She merely smiles. She’s not comfortable in dealing with other people except with me and our friends. She’s conservative and reserved. I’m her total opposite, I hate people who are sensitive and are hard to deal with. We had a great relationship despite our differences. We don’t let misunderstandings last for a day. We always do our best to solve the problems that come our way but not until the time when she met her first love. But two months after we had a misunderstanding, she texted me at around 10 p.m. to meet her in the park. She said she really missed me and she wanted to fix the gap between us. I also missed her and I wanted to fix our problem. I went to the park immediately and I saw her sitting on the bench where we first met. She’s staring at the ground and her shoulders were down. I know she’s crying because I can hear. I held her shoulders and whispered, “Liz, I’m here.” She looked at me teary eyed. She hugged me and said, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” “Hush! It’s okay now, we’re okay now. Stop crying Liz, I don’t want to see you like this.” She looked at me seriously then said with a firm voice, “I love Renz, Kaye. I really love him, and no one can get him away from me! No one!” “I know. That’s why I did things to help you fix the problem because I don’t want to see you miserable and lonely just because of him but you misinterpreted it Liz.” She smiled bitterly and said,” Misinterpreted? Maybe? Sorry, Kaye!” “Stop saying the word sorry, okay? The important thing is that we will bring back the friendship we had for almost seven years. She looked at me genuinely, “Yeah! We’re really okay now! Whatever happens between us, you’ll always be my bestfriend, and I will always be your bestfriend. You’ll always forgive me whenever I commit mistakes, right?” “Of course you’re my bestfriend ... and I love you so much so I can forgive you no matter what.” She gave me a sweet smile “I love you, too. So there’s no gap between us anymore? Am I already forgiven?” “Yeah, you’re forgiven, always forgiven.”
26
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Then she giggled, “Hey, I have a gift for you.S” “Is it a price for misinterpreting what I did for you?” “Yeah! Maybe.” She got something from her pocket and showed me a silver necklace with an angel pendant. “Oh my, it’s so cute!” “I designed it for you. Turn around I’m going to place it on your neck.” I laughed, “I’m so excited!” I felt she’s done placing the necklace but I wonder why she suddenly became silent. “Hey! What are you staring at my back?” I giggled. “My face is more beautiful than my back Liz,” I joked. But she didn’t utter any word. “Ah right, I figured it out. I haven’t thanked you for this beautiful necklace. Thank you so much Liz, I’m going to give you a precious gift too next time,” then I held the pendant. I was amazed. It was an angel holding a rose. As I kissed the pendant, I faced her. It’s too late when I noticed her holding a gun. I heard a gun shot and felt a slight pain on my chest. Suddenly, my body felt numb. I dropped on the ground then she came closer to me and uttered the word, “Sorry” behind her sobs. “Why?” I said in a weak voice. Her tears fell down on my face. Then she told me “I love Renz, and no one could ever take him away from me. Not even you! Renz told me when we broke up that he doesn’t love me, that the girl whom he really loves is you! He confessed that the only reason why he courted me is because of you, for he wanted to make you happy! Kaye... SORRY!” Before my eyes totally closed, Liz kissed my forehead. Then I saw Liz pointing the gun on her head. I heard another gunshot then I felt her body fall on the ground beside me. I was trying to reach the hands of Liz. When suddenly... I heard footsteps on the ground.
27
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Foolish Heart
She held my hands and I noticed her teary eyes and cold hands. “Babe, I love you, but I also love my family. I’ll be settling with them for good in New York next week. I’m sorry if I didn’t tell you earlier. I just don’t know how. I will miss you.” She hugged and kissed me like she never did before. I could feel her tears on my shoulders. A couple of minutes had passed and she still kept her arms around me. I could feel her pain. My heart shattered into pieces. Yes, she would leave me. She would move into a place miles away from me. We’ve been together for six years and I couldn’t imagine my life without her. “Babe, I may be away from you, but always remember that I love you and will always love you. I will wait for you.” Upon hearing those words, I could hardly hold back my tears, so I pushed her away from me and sprinted away from her. That was the first time I cried that much. “You’re so unfair!” I exclaimed. I didn’t know what to do. My life no longer had direction. I even made up my mind to quit and end my life. While the cold water rushed down my body in the shower room, and my wrist came as the focus of my sentiments, I had a sight of a blade in an array of light bending over its glistening surface. Through a cut, my misery can vanish. So I closed my eyes, and concocted for a signal, then suddenly I heard a loud noise yowling and resounding over the door knob being twisted by a familiar voice, my mom. “Hey, is somebody inside? Open it up, hurry! I am already late!” For quite somehow, I realized that maybe it’s a sign that what I was trying to do was absolutely insane because by doing so, it would only mean that I’m weak. Truly, life is everything. I needed to move on and face the reality. So, I opened the door and hugged my mom tightly. “What happened dear?” my mom curiously asked. “I’m just happy that I have you mom. I love you,” I sincerely answered. By then, I became optimistic. I faced the day with a smile and decided to set my environment like nothing happened. As I walk towards our school everyday, I still feel the pain. I always remember the happy days when we we’re walking together as she keeps the smile in my face with her untimely pranks. I remember how she held and caressed my ears as if her day wouldn’t be complete without doing so. I couldn’t explain what happened to me during that moment. My surrounding stopped. My mind was suddenly altered. I wanted to continue my malevolent plan. My sight came into focus with the raging vehicles in a debauched road. I wanted to cross it at the end of my count. I really wanted it so bad, so cars would clatter my body into pieces like what she did to my heart. One, two, three, four. Keeping my firm position at, suddenly, I heard a voice again. “Hey, come on, what are you doing here? Don’t you have a class? Let’s go!” My friend, who came like a thief, cranked up my moment. He halted his car before me. So was the time I apprehended that I should not really do it because a number of people are there to fill in the gaps in my life- my family and friends.
28
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
For the next five days, I really tried to compose myself. I tried to be strong. I tried to show my classmates that I’m happy, that despite what happened, I could still relish life. She doesn’t deserve me. Maybe it was true that I couldn’t find someone like her, but it was certain that someone better would replace her. Five days before her departure, I constantly received text messages and phone calls from her but I never did dare to read them as well as to answer her calls because by doing so, it would hurt me more. The time has come. She’ll be leaving the country. Before she leaves, I texted her to pour out my hurts and anger to her. “I hate you and I don’t want you anymore in my life. I realized that you’re not a loss. Goodbye.” To my surprise, I received a sudden reply. “ Jayson, this is her cousin, she already gave her phone to me, she just left minutes ago. She was crying and really feels bad.” “I don’t care,” I indignantly replied. Unconsciously, I find myself crying in my bed. I’m in excruciating pain because I realized that she’s gone and I will never see her gain. Truly, I couldn’t blame her because she badly wants to be with her family. An hour passed, I checked my phone and it showed 73 messages received and 32 missed calls, all from her. It ends up that much because I never answered her calls nor read her text messages. I finally made up my mind to read her text messages. And to my surprise, all messages have the same content which makes me stumble on my knees. “Babe, I love you so much. Babe, just say that you still love me and I won’t leave. Just say you can’t live without me, and I won’t leave anymore. Please reply.”
29
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Black Sitio Dark dawn, bright day Roaming around all the way Just a simple walk and light jog Feeling the fresh essence of fog Time passed, the dew fell together No fog but smog Tracing why all changed Decided to sit and think under the rain A man fell down, group of boys ran Shocked and cried, I knelt Once a peaceful place, now a dark city The bad came to trigger the fear.
32
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Wasted Relationship I treasure him as my only king Who gave me the true sense of loving His gentle hands of caring Stays with me like a string. I treasure him as my only charm Who gently holds my lovely arm Suddenly, I felt warm Lying on his arm He held my hand He held my waist He held the end That made me feel a waste I hate him I dumped him He screwed me He trashed me Though he’s my father Respect should be I know he has another And he made me.
33
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Abused
After trudging the busy city streets at night I’m already used to bottles smashed here and there And bastardly goons after a drink, a fight As I reach the front yard of our house It’s more terrifying than the thought of killers running about Because I know as I open the door, here comes a pounce “Why are you late?” “Where have you been?!” Every night this is all I hear And yet back then it was so simple Eat, bathe, study, sleep and pray I’m not slapped I’m not wacked Heck! I’m not even touched But just the sound of their voices A bunch of things come to my mind Blades, pills, ropes, and knives I’m never physically abused But what hurts me more is them telling me How incompetent I am How idiotic I am That hurts the most What I receive every night Utter torture from verbal homicide
34
Almost Fearless There are two things, I fear the most The first would be death And the second is a paper A blank piece of paper The way it stares back at me I hear its mocking I sense its taunts I fear the impasse I hate it, too. There are two things I fear the most But which of them I fear more I do not know.
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Bitterness Lying on my hard and rough bed All things are turning to red Red the color of blood and rose Blood-stained suit of a ghost A ghost which had a shimmering white suit Now stained with blood because of brute Brutality of a wicked woman With nowhere the ghost can’t run The ghost who hunted me in the darkness The ghost who gave me loneliness The ghost who was killed by a woman A woman who found another man A woman who killed the man who loved her Just for her to be with another A ghost who was stabbed at the back A ghost who was stabbed with an enormous rock. An enormous rock of betrayal Pain concealed in denial A ghost that I have known once Known at just one glance And as I woke up and stood behind the door I saw myself in front of a mirror Wearing a shimmering white suit Stained with blood
35
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Damsel in Disguise A girl with an enchanting beauty With a face created perfectly She is everybody’s choice She has the most beautiful voice A voice that makes every man fall A voice that breaks hindering walls A voice that gives hope A voice that allows you to cope But no one has really known this girl That makes every man’s heart swirl She lives in a place called nowhere And makes every heart suffer Her name passes on every mouth Now I know her without doubt She was the girl I once fell in love with When I still had the mind of a kid She has the voice that makes every man fall But leaves them when they call A voice that brings you to the right way A girl who is never expected to betray She has the most enticing face She was innocent in many ways The face became a monster before my eyes The girl who made all feelings die
36
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Three A.M.
Awake at three Drenched in own sweat Footsteps came nearer Shivering amidst warm air The call of full bladder Petrified by the wrecking door knob Whispers of unknown creatures Flickering light Blanket wrapped around the body The alarm stage Head and bed Moving at once Screaming mute I am dead
Zombie I am the unborn I am stubborn I am nocturnal The graveyard sent me out Creepy and vain Brains are the best present Time counts when you catch your Z’s Be careful not to turn your back You’ll never know I can suck
37
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
A Want Gone Wrong “Hey, you know Lark? The boy-next-door whom you like so much? Well, he already has a date to the masquerade ball this coming Saturday. What’s your plan now?” asked Hannah. “I might not come then. It won’t exactly be my cup of tea seeing that guy dancing with another girl,” said a disappointed Vicky. “You know what? I heard the new bookstore in front of the city hall just opened. Come on, let’s check it out!” Hannah said excitedly. “Okay! Okay! I’ll just get my things,” said Vicky. FRIDAY, 5:30 p.m. “Hmm… nothin’ much to look at. Their fiction novels will be released next week. So, you’re goin’ home already?” asked Hannah as they reached the 3rd floor of the bookstore. “You go ahead, I’ll see you at home later,” said Vicky as she stared at a book shelf filled with books about abnormality. SATURDAY, 12:01 a.m. Vicky slowly opened her eyes… “Nothing happened?!” “What the fudge? It didn’t work! Useless piece of crappy book! I just wasted money on it!” growled Vicky as she threw the book she bought the day before. “It’s already midnight anyway. Time to hit the sack,” said Vicky as she slowly made her way towards her room and tucked herself in her comfy queen-sized bed and blanket. Soon, she was asleep. SATURDAY, 9:00 a.m. “VICKKYYY!!!” screamed Hannah. “What are you doing this early?! It’s only 9 a.m.!” screamed Vicky. “Guess what? Lark just called a few minutes ago asking if you were already awake! He asked if you could call him when you’re awake!” screeched Hannah as she was still jumping up and down on top of Vicky with a smile reaching her ears end to end. “Really? You’re not joking, are you?” Vicky’s eyes opened wide as she heard the news. “Does this face and tone of voice sound like I’m joking? Now get up, eat your breakfast so we can call him back,” said Hannah excitedly. After eating breakfast, brushing her teeth and doing all her morning rituals, Vicky quickly went down and sat with Hannah. In the living room she dialled Lark’s number, turned on the loud speaker and soon enough, he answered. “Vicky, hey! Good morning! I was wondering if you already have a partner for tonight?” asked Lark shyly. “Oh! Me?! Unfortunately no one invited me. I don’t think anybody will take me to the ball anyway,” said Vicky as the smile on her face disappeared as she recalled that Lark already had a partner. “Well... I think Jenny had to cancel and I was thinking if you could go to the ball with me?” asked Lark over the phone.
38
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
“Yes! Yes! Of course! Pick me up at 8! Thank you so much Lark!” said Vicky excitedly and she ended the call. It was like a fairytale to her – Lark taking her to the ball. SATURDAY, 7:30 p.m. Hannah already left with her beau who picked her up at 7 p.m. while Vicky was left alone in their house. Vicky was putting on her scarlet-red lipstick when the lights started to flicker. She got her phone and turned on the flashlight and soon after, the flickering lights stopped. Then, she heard a loud thumping noise at their front door. She heard it so clearly. It was just below the window of her bathroom. It wasn’t from any of the rooms on the 2nd floor of their house, otherwise, it would have been louder. “What is happening?!” she shouted trying to calm herself down as she tried to assure herself that nothing unusual was happening. She was putting on the finishing touches of make-up on her face. When she was done, she looked up at the bathroom mirror and saw a man! She ran in her red stilettos out of their house. She was looking back at their front door when she felt as if someone was touching her shoulders. She turned her head and let out a big gasp. It was only Lark. It was already 8 p.m. She was relieved and so they made their way towards the ball recalling if she had locked the door of their house on her way out. While glancing back at their house, it was as if she saw a shadow moving inside. The light emanating from the street lamp in front of their house was bright enough and surely, she wasn’t hallucinating. CITY GYMNASIUM, 8:46 p.m. “Hey Vicky! We’re already here! You fell asleep when we’re on our way to the city gymnasium,” giggled Lark after seeing Vicky opened her eyes. “I’m sorry! Do I look okay? I don’t wanna embarrass you,” said Vicky shyly as her cheeks blushed. “How cute! Let’s go,” said Lark, smiling. HANNAH AND VICKY’S RESIDENCE, 11:35 p.m. “Thanks for the night Vicky. It was wonderful. Mind if I crash here for the night? I’m exhausted,” asked Lark as he showed his killer smile. “Uh..Y-yeah! Of course! Thanks for asking me to be your partner. It’s kinda late and Hannah said she’ll be sleeping at the house of her date.” said Vicky as she felt her cheeks slowly warming up again. Sure enough, she was blushing again. VICKY’S ROOM, 12:00 m.n. Vicky was already sleeping when she heard a loud knock on her door. She was terrified. She opened her side table lamp and the door slowly opened. It gave Vicky the shivers. It sent a spine-tingling feeling to her. From her head to her feet, she felt as if she was cold even though the air conditioner was off. It was Lark. She turned on the lights. But something was definitely not right. The lights started to flicker again. Lark was walking towards her but it was as if he was walking without any life. “Lark! Stop it! You’re scaring me!” shouted Vicky. Lark lifted his head. His eyes were all white and his open mouth was drooling with blood. He’s not breathing.
39
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
With her bedroom lights and side table lamp flickering, she noticed a shadow behind Lark. It was not Lark’s. Vicky noticed that Lark was holding a knife on his right hand. Vicky ran towards her bathroom and locked herself. She turned on the lights. But when she looked at the mirror, she saw a man staring at her. The man had scars on his face, blood continuously drips on the other side of the mirror. She soon noticed the man’s blood dripping on her sink below the bathroom mirror. She stepped back until her back was against the bathroom wall. Her eyes were wide open. The knocking on her bathroom door stopped. The lights were stable. The man in the mirror disappeared. There was no trace of the man’s blood on her sink. A few seconds later, Lark destroyed her bathroom door. Vicky saw that Lark was bleeding. He had a cut on his face similar to the man he saw in the mirror. His eyes are still all white. The boy-next-door whom she loved with simple romantic gestures and pleasing personality was gone. Lark had been possessed. No less than a minute, she had been hacked to pieces. She could see herself being hacked helplessly from a distance. She cried. She recalled what she said the night before: “I want to make Lark WANT me.” SUNDAY, 8:35 a.m. Hannah arrived at their house and saw Lark on their couch. He wasn’t breathing anymore. With an odd feeling, she presumed he was just sleeping. She then went to Vicky’s room. She tried to wake her up but it’s too late. Vicky was lying on her bed, lifeless. They grieved for her death as well as Lark’s. They later went home after Lark and Vicky’s bodies were sent to the hospital morgue. The doctors found a print on Lark and Vicky’s right wrists. It was an inverted star enclosed in two rings. Between those two rings are ancient Latin writings. They gave no special attention to it and let it be with the presumption that both got the same tattoo done on their same parts. Weeks after, Hannah found a witchcraft book. She was sure it wasn’t on Vicky’s bed before they went to the hospital. And there was no way anyone could have placed it on top of Vicky’s bed. It was left opened in a page about how to manipulate someone’s feelings. She also saw a note on it: “To those who shall use this spell, do so carefully. After you have made this ritual, make a defensive-spell on the place where you have done this so that no other spirits will interfere and meddle in your ritual which otherwise, can spell fatal results.” “Vicky didn’t notice the warning before she made the ritual. She wanted Lark immediately. She wanted Lark but did she really love Lark? Would someone who loves a person do such thing? Resorting to other methods such as black magic just to get him?” Hannah said to herself. Hannah told her mother what Vicky did and they kept it as a family secret. They wanted to protect Vicky’s reputation as well as theirs. The witchcraft book originally owned by Vicky has landed into the hands of others. Some have succeeded to master the rituals, incantations and chants from the book and some have failed and ended up in the same fate as Vicky.
40
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Mary’s Lamb Our eyes met and I knew that from somewhere, from someone, I have seen those pretty eyes. Something is different. It is not happiness that clouds those eyes, I saw sadness, grief, disappointment. So I asked Mary, “What’s the name of your pretty lamb?” The lamb and Mary looked at each other. Mary and Lisa are my best friends. Mary is as old as me and Lisa is 3 years older than us. We’ve been friends since we were kids. But ever since, Mary has always been closer to Lisa. When we were seven years old, Mary’s parents died. It was a fine night, everybody was settling down to go to sleep when all of a sudden, wolves attacked Mary’s house. They killed Mary’s parents and then left her. Wolves are very vicious animals. They are not afraid of anything except for witches. In the countryside, it is believed that witches are not made, rather, they are born. We were all surprised that Mary was left unharmed. Usually, when wolves attack, they don’t leave anyone behind alive. We knew Mary’s parents well and none of them were witches. Since the incident, Mary became very different. Lisa moved to Mary’s house to look after her. They have been really close. Whenever you see Lisa, you’ll surely see Mary behind or beside her. Lisa is a lovely lady. She is like Snow White, also as white as snow. Everybody likes her, especially with those beautiful eyes. She is kind, loving and cheerful. She loves Mary so much that she sacrificed her studies just to take care of her. She even left their home and family to stay with Mary. But one day while Mary and Lisa were at the market, Lisa saw John. And I knew from that look that something’s up. John started to court Lisa even if he and Mary don’t get along with each other. One day, I overheard Mary and Lisa talking deep in the woods, a place full of flowers and whenever the wind blows, the warm breeze carries along the scent of the flowers, but, suddenly, the flowers were replaced with the stench of rotten leaves. I never heard them talk to each other like that. “I don’t like him, Lisa. He is rude and he will take you away from me!” Mary said. “Nothing will change Mary, we will still be the same! And he will not take me away from you, nothing and no one will, Mary,” Lisa answered back. “NO!” shouted Mary. “It will never be the same!” she continued and now she is crying. Mary put her hands on her face to cover the tears. It’s as if she doesn’t want Lisa to see her crumble down. Lisa was mad at the same time shocked with what she heard and that was the first time she saw Mary cry like that. Lisa moved forward and
41
PABALAT
The Marian Loosea Ink VII
hugged Mary. “I love you Mary, nothing will take me away from you Not even death. I will always be here Mary,” Lisa said, her voice is soft and loving. “So that means you will leave him for me?” Mary asked with a happy voice “Mary...” Lisa said trying to tell Mary to understand what she meant. Mary pushed Lisa away from her and she said with rage, “I thought nothing will separate us? You said that!” “Yes Mary. But it doesn’t mea—“ Lisa said. “You can’t have us both. Me or that pathetic guy, Lisa?”Lisa was shocked with what Mary said. “All my life Mary, I devoted all for you. I left my family and home just to take care of you and this is what you pay me back?” Lisa said in a soft but firm voice. Mary just stared right into Lisa’s eyes. “Me or him, Lisa?!” she shouted. Lisa looked at Mary straight in the eyes, “I also have my own dreams Mary and I’ve sacrificed a lot for you but why can’t you do the same for me?” she said trying to convince Mary. Lisa broke their eye contact and said, “I love him and he proposed to me Mary.” She looked at the leaves that fell from the trees above them. Mary’s standing still but I felt the rage that she has been hiding. “What did you say?” asked Mary. Lisa, now avoiding Mary’s eyes, “I said... I said Yes.” And there was silence... The wind blew but it’s not the same warm comforting breeze that I usually feel; instead, all I felt was a pure cold breeze. Mary turned her back from Lisa and she started to move away from her. “Mary! Where are you going?!” Lisa shouted. “Away from you...” replied Mary but with a cold voice. “Wait!” said Lisa. Mary stopped but she didn’t turn to look at Lisa. “Remember what I said that nothing will take me away from you? Well, I will rephrase that Mary,” Lisa said with her fist tightly closed in her side. “Nothing will take me away from you Mary except from... except from your selfishness!” Lisa said and she turned away from Mary and ran out of the woods. Mary stood still as if she is not affected with what Lisa said but I saw the surprise in her eyes. She was left alone with those last words of Lisa still echoing around her. That was the last time I saw them together. Days, weeks and months had passed. Lisa asked me to accompany her to visit Mary at her house. But whenever we go there, Mary is not there and it looks like the house had been abandoned. Lisa was so worried. Mary is nowhere to be seen but one day while I was helping Lisa and John pick the perfect flowers for their wedding, Mary
42
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
came out from nowhere. “Mary! Where have you been darling, i’ve been looking for you?” Lisa said with great happiness. “I’m happy to see you too Lisa, I just went into the woods to get some good air. By the way,” turning to John, “I’m sorry for what I’ve said,” Mary said. “Apology accepted Mary, as long as my love is happy, I am happy as well,” John replied. “Oh... dear...” said Lisa in her sweet and loving voice. “Good to hear that,” Mary said. “I have something for you both. It’s a wedding gift for you. I made it while I was in the woods. Come by at around 6:00 p.m. at the flower garden,” she continued. “You’re so sweet, Mary. Okay then, we’ll come there as soon as we are finished with our preparations for today,” Lisa said. “Okay then, I’ll be going now. I have a lot of things to do,” Mary answered back. “Bye Mary, take care, okay?” said Lisa. Mary smiled and she said her goodbye to us but something was different. Her eyes used to be innocent and lovely but now it’s as if she doesn’t have a soul. After that conversation, I never heard anything from Lisa or John. A few days later, news spread around that John’s body was found lifeless but Lisa was still missing. Nobody saw Mary after that incident. I wonder if Mary heard the news and is now grieving for her loss. We were all sorry for her because everyone knew that Lisa was the only family that Mary ever had. My mother asked me to pick some flowers, so I went to the flower garden to get some flowers when all of a sudden I was surprised to see Mary there. “Mary!” I called out to her while waving my hands. Mary saw me and she smiled at me. I can see in her eyes that she’s fine but I’m quite surprised because she isn’t sad about Lisa’s disappearance. Maybe she is not aware of what happened. Mary was walking towards me when I noticed someone, I mean something’s following her. It’s a lamb. The lamb was as white as snow and it was so beautiful. “Wow, Mary that’s a very beautiful lamb!” I said to her. Mary smiled and patted the lamb’s head and said “Thank you.” The lamb looked at me and our eyes met and I knew from somewhere, from someone that I have seen those pretty eyes but something is different. It is not happiness that clouds those eyes; instead, I saw sadness, grief, disappointment. So I asked Mary,“What’s the name of your pretty lamb?” The lamb and Mary looked at each other. Mary said, “Her name is Lisa.” And she shot a peculiar look at me.
43
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Abode of the Dead Beneath the ground lies, Souls of the departed comprise Lost hopes, lost dreams arise In this place cold as ice Absence of light is intrusive Dark memories still evocative All in deep misery, can’t believe Eternal punishment will they writhe Hades and Persephone do exist In their kingdom of spirits at abyss I perceive all these things in just a glimpse When I saw myself lying with bloodied wrists.
Trick or Treat Baboon treading to the north Swiftly sipping the putrid broth He extends his unshorn hands over trees Grasping the apples that the serpent offers “Sweet…sweet.. you baboon eat” “Yes I will, I won’t refuse this feast” He chomps the fruit Then he becomes mute “Trick or treat” Serpent chuckling, “I beat! I beat!” “In your dreams, you won’t defeat!” “I may look like futile mortal, “But don’t you know that I have a pocket in my buccal?” He spits the gnawed apple “Sweet…sweet.. no it’s not sweet” “Trick or treat, I myself is mortal a beast won’t ever beat?!”
46
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Naytendae O beautiful and attractive sun, Your light rays are now gone. Unlimited horizon I now stare, Its color too has become a blur. Trees calm, morning so warm, You have risen and here you come. Smiling creatures now I see, How lovely is He who created thee.
Obra Maestra Nakahimlay sa katahimikan, Animo’y binabalot ng kadiliman Sa lugar na napakalamig at sikip Tila isang masalimuot na panaginip Nang biglang liwanag ang kalakip Sumibol ang bukod tanging sining Isang kahanga-hangang likha at disenyo ng Isang dalubhasa. Ako , ikaw, tayong lahat! Ay Kanyang Obra Maestra
47
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Chapters Closing my eyes, I counted slowly Letting my imagination preoccupy my mind Though throbbing in pain, I ignored it absently And my mind began to wander as I started One… Happiness that started my world Perfect it seemed at first I was contented, happy ‘Til it all crumbled to dust Two… Everyone left, I was alone They’ve forgotten me and left me to wander The light of my world disappeared I stared at the darkness with dimming eyes Three… I loved, I admit I did You made me feel it The intoxication, the agony, the pain But in return, you never loved me Four… I have friends who cared for me But I always made them cry Because of all my tragedies That I selfishly shared to ease the pain Five… My mind, my heart ached As I recall the memories Those that I unsuccessfully tried to forget The ones that stayed hidden in the years that went by Counting always makes me tired ‘Til a heavy stupor cradled me I continued to close my eyes Waiting for my nightmare to haunt me
48
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
The Score He jerks to grip the bat resolutely, Wears the gloves to shield his body. His thump befits hasty, hunger makes him slake. He starts to run, he pauses and continues, And the real battle just began.
Heaven Came Down Wandering in the darkness, For my day became night. Until I met a compassionate friend, And He showed me the light Walking through the storm, Keeping my head down, I am afraid. When suddenly He walked with me, He held my head high, I walked on. Running soiled so quickly, And as a sinner I came. He took proffered His grace, I am washed, He saved me. Oh what a wonderful day! When my soul filled with glory, From His precious hand I feel, That heaven came down for me
49
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Sleep and Slumber Anxious, I lie awake with your vague memory lingering in my mind. The cool breeze of the autumn night flows through the open window, And into my bedroom, gently rustling the pages of my open textbooks. The clock’s striking midnight and dear, you still haven’t arrived. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten our daily routine, our habitual meeting? How much longer shall I wait? Perhaps you have another date? And then I sense your long awaited presence, an arrival I’ve anticipated all day. I feel you silently creeping into bed with me and soon my eyelids grew heavy. At long last, I enter a dream, drift into oblivion and drown in a sea of pure bliss. But our time together are fleeting moments. Hours pass like mere seconds. At daybreak, when my tired eyes flutter open at the sound of a buzzing alarm, I find that you have abandoned me. How I wish you didn’t have to flee so soon. With only hazy memories to reminisce, I grudgingly get ready for school. Please don’t follow me there for my professors can’t comprehend our innocent affair. Until our reunion again tonight, just remember I send my love and please be on time.
50
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Istorya Tupo Tupo... Pambata ang Tagpo Sino bang mag-aakala na si Dora the Explorer at Barbie ay magkamag-anak pala? Pinsang buo ni Barbie si Dora na matagal nang nawawala. Matagal nang ipinahahanap ni Barbie si Dora kay Superman, Batman, Spiderman at iba pang miyembro ng Justice League, pati na rin ang mga Avengers. Hiningan niya na din ng tulong si Ben 10 na ngayon ay isa na ring kilalang super hero. Ito ay dati namang kalaro ni Dora sa may Impossible Island. Mailap ang kapalaran nina Barbie at Dora, pilit silang pinaghihiwalay ng tadhana. Marahil ay dahil sa palaging paglalakbay ni Dora sa kung saan-saang lugar. Sa kabilang dako, kasalukuyan namang nakita ni Dora na matamang nakikinig si Barney sa kwento ni Spongebob habang ipinaghehele si Patrick. Lumapit siya sa mga ito para anyayahan sa kanyang paglalakbay subalit tumanggi ang mga ito dahil gabi na raw at kailangan na nilang magpahinga. Ipinagpatuloy ni Dora ang paglalakbay hanggang sa makarating siya sa isang baybayin kung saan ang isang magandang bata, na tingin niya’y kaedad niya lamang na gabing gabi ay lumalangoy. Hanggang sa ito’y sumampa sa pampang at tinawag ang kanyang pangalan. Nagpakilala ito bilang Little Mermaid. Inanyayahan niya si Dora sa malaking angkan ng mga sirena para maranasan ang buhay nila sa gabing iyon. Si Dora’y pansamantalang naging sirena hanggang sa nagbalik ulit siya sa dati at ipinagpatuloy muli ang paglalakbay. Hindi namalayan ni Dora na sa tagal ng kanyang paglalakbay, napadpad na pala siya sa isang airport. Akala ng mga nagtratrabaho doon ay anak siya ng isang pasahero na lumulan sa isang eroplano at naiwan kaya pinilit nila itong pinasakay sa papaalis nang eroplano. Nakarating si Dora nang wala sa oras sa Pilipinas. Hawak-hawak ang kanyang map, dali-dali siyang nagtungo sa Jolly town. Nagkita sila ng dating alaga ng pinsan niyang si Barbie na si Jollibee, na naging taga-aliw niya nung nasa Japan sila. Nagkamustahan ang mga ito hanggang sa hiniling ni Dora na ihatid siya sa isa ring alaga ni Barbie na si McDonald. Nagkita-kita ang mga ito at nagkayayaang magliwaliw muna sa Star City bago tumuloy sa Enchanted Kingdom. Samantala, naikwento naman ni Dora ang masalimuot na paghihiwalay nila ni Barbie sa mga ito. Ayon kay Dora, dahil daw sa curiousity niya sa mga bagay-bagay at lugar ang dahilan ng kanilang paghihiwalay. ‘Di raw
51
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
niya kasi namalayan noon na gabi na at malayo na siya sa lugar kung saan nagpapa-makeup si Barbie para sa kanyang debut party. Bumalik siya sa lugar pero wala na ito. ‘Di na rin daw niya makontak si Barbie sa kanyang phone dahil lowbat na siya at naiwan niya ang charger nito. ‘Di rin sila makapag-online para maichat sana sa facebook o maimessage sa YM dahil ‘di niya dala ang kanyang tablet maski ang iPhone. Ang tanging dala lang niya sa backpack ay ang kanyang camera, payong, tubig, chips, cookies at flashlight in case of emergency. Nahabag naman ang mga ito sa sinapit niya, kung kaya humingi sila ng tulong kay Darna, Captain Barbell, Lastikman at iba pang Pinoy superheroes para maiparating kay Barbie na nasa Pilipinas na si Dora. Samantala, patuloy naman ang paghahanap ng mga pinaghingan ng tulong ni Barbie kay Dora. Subalit di niya malaman kung bakit bigo pa rin ang mga ito na mahanap ang kanyang pinsan. Hanggang sa magpatawag ang lider ng Charlie’s Angels ng isang meeting para sa lahat ng mga superheroes sa iba’t-ibang panig ng mundo upang pagsanibin ang pwersa ng bawat isa. Pagkatapos ng meeting ay may acquaintance party ang mga ito. Dito nagkakila-kilala ang mga sugo ni Dora na mga Pinoy superheroes at ang mga sugo ni Barbie na grupo ng Justice League, Avengers at iba pa. Hanggang sa nagsanib na nga ng pwersa ang mga ito para pagtagpuin sina Dora at Barbie sa mismong Christmas Eve. Di maipinta ang ngiti nina Dora at Barbie sa pagkikita nilang muli. Tinawagan nila ang kanilang mga magulang at kamag-anak para sa isang reunion party. Mahigit sampung taon na ang nakakaraan makalipas magtagpo ang dalawa. Thirty years old na si Barbie at masaya na sa piling ng kanyang asawang si Superman at ng dalawa nilang anak. Seventeen years old na rin si Dora at hilig pa rin nito ang maglakbay sa iba’t ibang lugar. MU na rin sila ni Ben 10 na masasabing man of her dreams dahil mula pagkabata ay ito na ang kanyang Prince Charming.
52
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Kwentong Upuan Eeeeeeekkkkk............. Tunog iyon ng pinto ng silid na aking kinaroroonan. Unti- unting pumasok ang kakaunting liwanag at dumampi sa aking kabuuan. Maglilimang taon na simula noong huli kong masilayan at makasama ang mga taong nagmamay-ari sa akin. Ang malalakas nilang tawanan at ang natatanging pagmamahalan nila sa isa’t isa. Habang tumatagal ay naririnig ko ang papalakas na yabag ng mga paa na tila papalapit sa aking kinalalagyan. May sumisilip mula sa pintuan..... Halika. Huwag kang matakot... Lara? Ikaw na ba ‘yan? Halika. Dali. Maupo ka’t magpahinga. Mukhang galing ka sa mahabang biyahe at mukhang pagod na pagod. Kumusta ka na? Kumusta ang pag- aaral mo? Naaalala ko pa noong ika’y bata pa. Nag-aaral ka pa lang maglakad noon. Muntik ka nang mahulog at madapa, mabuti na lang at nasalo kita kaagad. Eh yung mga sandaling nag-aaaral ka pa lang magsulat ng pangalan mo? Ito oh, sinulat mo pa nga sa mga kamay ko. Nagpapakita ito na pagmamay-ari mo ako ngunit nakakalungkot lang dahil malapit na itong mabura dahil sa tagal ng panahon. Minsan pa nga ayaw mo nang kumain dahil wala ako. Hindi ka kakain hangga’t hindi ako nahahanap ng tatay mo. Saan mo nga ba ako itinago noon? May pagkapilya ka rin talaga ano? Tuwang tuwa ako sa tuwing nakikita kitang mahimbing na natutulog sa akin habang ginagawa mo ang iyong mga takdang aralin. Saksi ako sa mga paghihirap at pagtitiyaga mo makatapos lang ng pag-aaral. Kailan kaya ulit mangyayari ang mga iyon, Lara? Halika na. Umupo ka muna’t makipagkwentuhan sa akin... Ang laki na ng pinagbago mo at gayun din ang ibinigat mo. Siguro kumakain ka na ng gulay ngayon. Naaalala mo pa ba noon? Madalas kayong magaway ng nanay mo dahil ayaw mong kumain ng gulay. Lara, magsalita ka naman. Bakit napakatahimik mo ata ngayon? Ahh, ito ba? Wala ito. Kaunting repair lang at magiging maayos na ito. Noong wala ka kasi nagkaroon ng ‘di pagkakaunawaan ang kuya mo at ang bunso ninyo. Dahil sa inis ng kuya mo, ewan ko ba kung bakit ako yung napagdiskitahan niyang ihagis. Minsan pa nga pinaglalaruan ako ng kapatid mo. Tadyak dito. Tadyak doon. May panahon pang nakalimutan nila akong ipasok sa inyong bahay. Naku! Akala ko’y katapusan ko na. Tangkain ba naman akong nakawin at gawing panggatong ng kapitbahay nyo? Pero ayos lang. Laking pasasalamat ko nga at nandito pa ako. Nasaan ka nga ba ng mga panahong iyon, Lara? Wala tuloy nagtatanggol at nag-aalaga sa akin. Namiss kita. Bakit ba kinailangan mo pang umalis. Heto ako ngayon nagiisa sa madilim at maduming bodega. Itinago ako dito ng papa mo. Di na raw ako mapapakinabangan pa. Bakit ayaw mong magsalita? Nandidiri ka ba sa akin dahil nababalot na ako ng mga alikabok at ako’y marupok na? Teka, saan ka pupunta? Iiwan mo na naman ako? Marami pa akong gustong sabihin. Wala na ba talaga akong silbi sa iyo? Kailan ulit kita makakasama aking kaibigan? ‘Di mo alam ang tuwang aking nadarama sa tuwing napagsisilbihan at napasasaya kita. Sandali lang kaibigan.. Laraaaaaa! Eeeeeeeekkkkk........Blag! Nabalot muli ng dilim ang buong silid na aking kinaroroonan. Walang katiyakan kung kailan muling papasok ang liwanag dito. Wala na nga ba akong silbi pagkatapos nang lahat ng naibigay ko sa kanya??? Dito lang ako, hanggang sa muli niyang pagbabalik.
(Ikaw kaibigan? Ikaw ba si Lara o ang kawawang upuan?)
53
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Korniii II
Mag-iisang taon na rin pala mula noong nagsimula akong mabuhay sa mundo ng kakornihan. Wala akong pinagsisisihan. Naging paraan ko ‘to upang masabi kung ano ang nararamdaman ko sa taong nagpatigil ng mundo ko. Dahil sa kakornihan ko, nakilala pa ako. Naaalala ko pa noong minsang napatabi ako sa pinto, ang sabi ko: “Ayaw ko nang tumabi sa pintuan, sawang sawa na akong matawag na boy-nextdoor.” Korni nga talaga. Pero kakornihan nga ba ang pagbibigay kulay sa iba’t ibang bagay? Minsan nga kahit hindi para sa’yo, affected ka, nakakarelate ka at kinikilig pa. Sa isang taong iyon, marami na ang nagbago. Mas dumami ang korning tao sa mundo. Nakalulungkot nga lang isipin na ginagawa na lamang nila itong katuwaan; wala nang sinseridad. Kasabay ng pagbabago sa grading system, ID at pagtaas ng tuition ay ang pagbabago ko. Naaalala niyo si Best? Oo. ’Yung tinutukoy ko sa part one ng korrrniii. Kung noon, malabo man ang mata ko, malinaw naman ang pagtingin ko sa kanya, ngayon wala na, kahit magkaroon pa ako ng katarata. (Lord, ’wag naman po sana.) Nagbago na nga ang ihip ng hangin. Hayun si Best, nakipagbreak na sa boypren niya. Ewan ko kung bakit. Kay tagal kong hinintay ang pagkakataong ito pero bakit ganun parang wala ng spark sa mga mata ko sa tuwing nakikita ko siya? Pero ang totoo, siya pa rin ang sinisigaw ng puso ko. Ah! Basta hindi biro ang ginawa ko noon ah. Pinag-iigib ko siya ng pampaligo, ginagawan ng assignments at projects at pinapasaya kapag siya’y nalulungkot. Kulang na nga lang magpatayo na ako ng fans club para sa kanya eh! Nang minsan kaming magkasalubong, wow! Ang ganda pa rin ni Best. Nagdalawang isip pa ako kung babatiin ko siya ng banat. Dahil sa inis, ito ang aking ginawa... “Hi Best, parlor ka ba?” ang tanong ko. “Bakit? Dahil nakaayos ako at laging maganda?” ang mabilis niyang sagot. “Hindi, mukha ka kasing bakla!” (no offense) ang mabilis kong banat. Dali-dali ko siyang iniwan at tuwang tuwa naman ako sa ginawa ko kahit alam kong nasaktan siya at napahiya. Ewan ko ba kung bakit ako nagkakaganito. ‘Di naman ako kape, bakit ang bitter ko? Mabuti pa kasi ang tubig nahuhulog, (waterfalls nga di ba?) ang London bridge is falling down. Eh ikaw Best, when are you going to fall in love with me? Mabuti pa si Dora my Boots, si Mr. Bean may Teddy. Ako kaya Best? Kelan magkakaroon sa buhay ko ng isang katulad mo? Ayaw kong gayahin si Anne Curtis, kung siya nakukuntento lang sa halik, ako hindi. “Best, kiss me and please, parang awa mo na, dare to fall in love with me.” Sana Jollibee na lang ang puso ko para laging “BIDA ANG SAYA DITO,” no time for sadness and pain. Erase! Erase! Erase! Ano ba itong pinagsasabi ko? Nagbago na nga ‘ko, ‘di ba? Basta! Bitter na kung bitter. Kayo kaya magkaganito? Gusto ko lang malaman mo Best, nasaktan mo ang damdamin ko dahil sa pambabalewala mo. Hindi ipis ang puso ko na kahit ilang beses mong saktan o tangkaing patayin ay buhay pa rin. Wala na talaga. Kakalimutan na kita. Kumbaga sa unlimited texting, nag-expire na ang pag-ibig ko sa’yo. Ayaw ko na magreload. Para ano pa? Wala namang signal puso mo eh, ayaw kumonek sa puso ko. Mula kay Best I have a friend. Siya na nga ata ang “da best” na kaibigan sa lahat. Minsan nga naitanong ko sa sarili ko, kaibigan lang ba o ka-ibigan? Oo, nahulog na nga ata ako sa kanya. Itago na lang natin siya sa pangalang “Korniborus.” Oo nga. Sounds great ‘di ba? Paano naman kasi, hindi siya nawalan ng kakornihan sa katawan. Banat dito, banat
54
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
doon. Heto naman ako sobrang kinikilig. Minsan pa nga sabi niya: “Best may ADHD ka ba? ... Kasi lahat ng atensiyon ko nasa sa’yo na.” Wah! Siyempre sobrang kinikilig ang lola niyo. Nakakalungkot mang isipin, unti-unting nawala ang mga masasayang araw na iyon. Parang lumalayo na si Best sa akin. Wala naman akong nakakahawang sakit. Mabango naman ako. I mean wala akong body odor at higit sa lahat maganda ako. Ano ba ang nagawa kong kasalanan sa kanya? Nakipagbreyk nga ako sa boypren ko dahil ‘di na ako masaya dun eh. Ready na nga akong sagutin ang mga banat nang Korniborus ko. Minsan, ang bait ni Lord, nagkasama kami ulit. OMG!! Can this be love I am feeling right now? Tahimik kaming dalawa hanggang sa... “Korniborus, kutsara ka ba? Kasi napapanganga ako kapag nakikita kita.” Wala siyang sagot. Walang pakialam. Deadma lang. Hindi ako sumuko. Isa pa. “Korniborus?” (This time malambing na.) “Ohh???” (Yes, sumagot siya!) “Side car ka ba?” Ang tanong ko. “Bakit?” Tanong niya. “Kasi single ako, di ka aandar ‘pag wala ako!” “Ang korni mo!” Ang pasigaw niyang sagot. Nagtinginan ang lahat ng tao sa amin at tuluyan na akong iniwan ni Korniborus ko. Napagisip-isip ko, kasalanan ko rin siguro. Kung bakit kasi binalewala ko siya noon. Gusto kong makabawi. Gusto ko lang din namang iparamdam sa kanya ang pagmamahal sa paraang nakasanayan kong ginagawa niya: ang korning banat. Gusto na kitang tubusin, ang laki-laki na kasi nang interes ko sa’yo eh. Korniborus ko, ikaw ang Google ko dahil lahat ng hinahanap ko, nasa’yo na. Ikaw ang MERALCO ko dahil sa’yo nakita kong “May liwanag ang buhay.” Tatandaan mo, ‘di ako nanonood ng Deal or No Deal pero kapag ikaw na ang laman ng brief case, sasali ako, magdideal at iuuwi kita. Tataya ako sa lotto kapag ikaw na ang jackpot prize ko. Nagmahal na ang gasolina at pamasahe. Tayo kaya, kailan magmamahalan? Dumating ang bigayan ng grades. Sa kauna-unang pagkakataon nagka-tres (3) ako. Pero okey lang. Ano naman kung tres? Basta ba uno ako lagi sa puso mo. Korniborus ko nasaan na ba ang susi ng puso mo nang makapasok na ako? Wala namang bagyo pero bakit laging may PAG-ASA sa puso ko na sana mapansin mo na ako? Sana malaman mong kahit di ka exam o tawag sa telepono sasagutin kita. Agadagad! Korniborus ko, mahal kita...mahal na mahal... Samantala, nagpunta si Korniborus sa computer shop. Korniborus: Iniwan ko si Best kanina. Nakakainis ang korni korni. Simsimi: Bakit mo iniwan? Balikan mo baka hinihintay ka na nun. Mabuti nga ikaw tinanggap niya pagiging korni mo eh. Korniborus: Bakit pa? No way! Simsimi: Kilala mo si Best? Korniborus: Ha? Bakit? Simsimi: Mahal yun ni Korniborus eh. Si Korniborus kilala mo? Korniborus: Oo naman. Ako yun. ‘Yun yung tawag ni Best sa akin eh. Simsimi: Ikaw pala ‘yung sinasabi niya sa aking napakamanhid na mahal na mahal na niya. Alam mo, ‘wag kang mapadala sa galit mo. Pairalin mo ang pagmamahalang nagdudugtong sa inyong dalawa. ‘Wag mong sayangin ang pagkakataon. Ikaw din, ang mundo ay parang Quiapo, maaagawan ka! *** Ano kaya ang kahihinatnan ng kwento? Makatulong kaya ang mga payo ng echuserang ibon na si Simsimi? Matuloy na kaya ang korning pag-iibigan ni Korniborus at ni Best o sadyang huli na ang lahat?
55
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
The Kiss in My Dream Your lips on mine it's sudden everything's so fine perfectly dreaming louder and crazier heart echoes even faster as the wind blows strong, intense can feel the warmth strain, tensed it's shaking the ground enchanting mesmerizing hypnotizing mysteriously dreaming shadows of mind romantic mystery reality i'd never mind dreaming is for free..
58
PABALAT HOMOsapiens
The Marian Loose Ink VII
We see a man and a woman in marriage Something a man and a man cannot do It's time to let loose my courage To take a leap of faith and pull it through Men pray for their ladylove to come So I gave up my share wholeheartedly Is it not an act of Christian charity? They should be thankful to my generosity Love is not about the ability to reproduce If you fall in love, you cannot choose Then who are you to discriminate If the society itself is full of hate? Why do you banish us from school? Since when is homosexuality breaking rule? People who should hear us when we speak, Are the ones who tell us that we're freak! Mock me as long as you can Even how hard you try, I’ll never give in I'm proud to be gay in every way! Even if I have a choice, I'll have it no other way
Hopeless Romantic
If homosexuality kills Then let it be! It's not you who'll die anyway So just let me be!
Mahogany locks Inviting lips Lashes, a brown lace The angel who fell on his world Blissful. Eternal. Unrequited. Delicate fingers clutching an empty bottle.
59
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Candy Sucks Go on honey Suck that luscious candy Satisfy your mouth so watery Yes, suck that stick-shaped candy But oh! Be gentle, not too harsh It might be torn apart! Go flame it up And let the candy’s fibers burn To give you pleasure in return Now suck! Suck! Suck in all its lush And you’ll make sure your life be rushed!
Kending Kadiri Ikaw ay kendi Pag-ibig mo’y tamis ang hatid Nilasap ko namang batid Akala ko’y walang bahid Ngunit nang malaman kong Ikaw pala’y sinubo na ng iba Marapat lamang ika’y aking iluwa Hindi ako desperado sa iyong lasa Ang pag-ibig ay kendi Hindi pwedeng dalawa ang maghati Ang pagsalu-salo ng laway ay kadiri Ang pagiging two-timer ay mali Tandaan mo Hindi lang ikaw ang kendi sa mundo May Hershey’s pang mas matino Kaysa sa’yo na tagpipiso!
60
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Himala May pag – asa pa ba? Tanong ko sa twina… Pwede pa ba? Ang muli ay makasama ka… Mga matatamis na ngiti, masisilayan pa ba? Mga maiinit na haplos, madarama pa ba? Ang maamo mong mukha, maaaninag pa ba? Mga malulutong na halakhak, maririnig pa ba? Hanggang sa pangarap na lang ba? Maaari pa bang magkaroon ng himala? Ang matamis na nakaraan, maibabalik pa ba? Kung sa mundong ito, lumisan ka na…
The Woo it'd never stop since ignited never will be tired 'til it'll be granted your heart mine would chase leave a mark nobody could erase wherever it'll go my heart will follow 'til i catch you somewhere down the rainbow a repeated question i'll be asking the sweetest answer i'll be waiting i'll never give up until you say "yes" when i finally ask: "would you be mine?"
61
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT Rainfall on the Sixth of April
Love is saying you’re just waiting for the rain to stop though you’re really hoping for it to pour even more. Love is laughing at random things. Love is feeling a touch of bliss even without saying anything. “Can you stay a little longer with me?” I was supposed to be home at five that afternoon, almost the same time when he asked me. “I’d be going back tomorrow. Just tell them you had to stay further because it’s mom’s birthday,” he added. He asked me – how could I turn that down? We didn’t really do anything reasonable after that. We just walked around and teased each other. He had me piggybacked on our way back to their place. And I was like this little girl – wearing her longest hair with her biggest smiling goo-goo eyes. “Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked. I don’t know. Maybe he was concerned that one of us – or just me – might feel disconnected once he goes back to the academy. If I’d count again, that would be four days before his Christmas break ends. Our ‘emotionally close friendship’ kicked off like a spur-of-the-moment kind of thing. We came up with the decision right there and then. “Of course I want to do this – with you,” I replied. I was not sure but I was in raptures, on cloud nine, in seventh heaven or whatever they call it. And since I knew him ‘so well,’ why not ‘give it a try,’ I told myself. Besides, I was pretty confident I was dealing with a good man. There wasn’t a ride going home when we reached the thoroughfare. We waited for about fifteen minutes but eventually, he decided to drive me home instead. Not even half-way, a storm came across. He maneuvered in front of a drugstore. There laid an aged wooden stool. It looked so ancient that it seemed to be there all this time expecting us. We rested there while waiting for the rain to stop. Ironically, I really wished it wouldn’t. When I felt cold, he pulled me closer to him. It felt amazing to be finally that close to him again since February. I could barely remember had I ever gotten a good call from him since he went to that summer camp. Now out of the blue, he’s here right next to me making me feel like everything is back to its place – back to that night when we first held hands reluctantly like we were shy high school sweethearts, back to that night when we danced and everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. “Thank you,” he said while we were swaying to the rhythm of the song ‘King and Queen of Hearts.’ He held me by the waist and mine were on his shoulders. The place was so magical and captivating. The cadets wore identical garbs and the ladies looked like princesses in their evening
62
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
gowns. Roses were all over the place. And everywhere you turn, there’s a feeling of excitement and delight! Old sweet songs were played on the hefty stereos. There’s an acoustic band all set to serenade the hearts of the cadets and their partners. Just a faint touch of light and you can feel the overflowing passion and affection in the atmosphere. “What?” I uttered, looking innocent. I really heard him the first time. I just felt an urge to hear it again. Besides, the music was pretty loud. I had to be sure I heard it right this time. “I said ‘thank you.’ You have no idea how happy you just made me.” For the first time in a long time, we were two mature individuals trying to figure out things between us. He listened to me dearly when I talked. I had a glimpse of his heart through his eyes and his smiles. He rested his head on my lap for a moment. Then he started talking about things that he didn’t usually want to talk about, especially in a face-to-face conversation. He told me about this instance where there would always be this time when you really don’t know the answer to something. He was trying to make a point to why I should not ask him why he was still with me. It started raining even harder. There were lightnings and thunders. We could barely hear what the other was saying. We moved to a more secured place but even there, the rain still reached us. It was almost nine and my mom was texting me saying it is inappropriate for a lady to still be out from home. And although we both knew that we needed more time to wait, we braced ourselves for the heavy rain and pursued our course. On our way, we were mumbling words at each other. It was really cold and we were already shivering. It felt funny that we really dared to be out in the open thinking we could actually take on the bad weather then end up stopping by another place again. We got absolutely drenched in the storm. He was looking down, feeling cold, maybe. I hugged him and he squeezed back. The place that sheltered us had a little light in it. We were silent for awhile. I think we were both contemplating. We watched the vehicles passing by the main road. I asked him when would be his next break. He would always tell me not to think too much about seeing him again because it would always be too long for me. “I’ll wait for you,” I whispered. My voice sounded a little scratchy. It took me quite some time to be able to pronounce those words. “I want to wait for you,” I breathed away. I knew he heard me and that he knew what I really meant. I felt him nod his head on my back. He got me home an hour later. “Where have you been?” my mom greeted us from the porch as I was opening the gate. It was almost ten. She looked at me fiercely. I felt bad he had to go through this but it felt wonderful at the same time. It was
63
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
new to everyone at home for me to be coming home late with someone – a guy, especially. I went in and out of the house searching for his sweater – the one he gave me. When I saw the two of them talking, I heard my mom said “get her home earlier next time.” I was really ecstatic that’s all she had to say – at least, that’s what I heard. I handed him the sweater. He wore it before saying goodbye to me and my mom. I kept those words, up until now. We were together but there was an obscure feeling of detachment coming from him. He changed over the summer. It bothered me. I tried to solicit his sentiments. I don’t think he ever said anything. One day he’s cold then be the opposite on the next, like in Katy Perry’s song. It terrified me. I knew by then that we were nearly ending. That he was slowly drifting away from me. Nevertheless, it never changed how I felt for him. I never gave up on him. I knew him so well back then, now I’m not quite sure. Love is patient and enduring. Love doesn’t keep count of mistakes. Love is being scared and being fearless at the same time. Love is smiling through all the heartaches. Love is feeling a loss of breathing. Love is giving in. Love is letting go. “I’m sorry but I can’t see myself with you.” I closed my eyes. Tears swiftly coursed through my face. I couldn’t stop. There was an outburst of emotions, a flashback of memories and whispers of the unexpressed feelings – each trying its way out of my chest. Like a thunderstorm, it hit me badly. It clouded my senses. My hearing had gone dysfunctional that all I was left to hear was my heart thumping. Like a bad weather, hurting is inevitable. They said one cannot truly experience the beauty of love without enduring the pain that comes with it once it is lost. If this is the beauty of love, then I’m not quite happy with it. I’m hurting so much that I don’t even know how to start being okay again. It is so numbing that I don’t feel anything else except it. What can I say; I was senselessly head over heels over this stone-cold creature. Like a text, I’m going through deconstruction right now, if you know what I’m saying. For me, that’s the most difficult theory I still couldn’t absorb. It took me days for that message to be decoded to my understanding. It felt surreal. The actual feeling is inexplicable, the kind that you don’t want anyone you love to ever feel. A friend told me ‘open wounds never heal if you keep on reopening them.’ So I’m just letting it be. Be a scar all you want; I just want you to heal on your own phase. Like the rainfall on the sixth of April, somehow, for a reason, it had to stop no matter how I yearned for it not to. Nothing lasts forever – the simplest explanation we all learn the hard way. As for me, I just found myself waking up from my fairytale. I had to. From this ending is where I’ll start again. “Isn’t it that a rainbow comes after the rain?” my little sister asked. I nodded with a smile on my face.
64
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Impure Magnolias Though my eyes were closed, the sunbeam didn’t fail to penetrate my black universe, my dark vision. I don’t wanna wake up in this bed filled with carnation petals, because I’m certain of one thing- he will leave me or I will make him. I felt his hot breath when his lips touched mine. Just then, I decided to welcome the bright day. But my heart frowned the moment I perceived both his eyes tearing. “I love you,” he whispered. My heart stopped beating like it was the first time I heard him utter those words to me. Before I could even do a thing, he hugged me so tight I can’t breathe. I love him this much too, if not more than. I received all his kisses while hugging his hard body which is so hot it made impossible for me to shiver. Without losing contact with his body, I managed to unclothe him. I was so overwhelmed the moment he placed his palm on my breast for a couple of second and realized the thing beneath is beating wild. Wilder and more reckless the way it did beat when he gently pulled my head closer to his face to kiss me harder. It seems he wants to leave me breathless yet filled with no regret but fulfillment and love, nothing more. Our heartbeats raced while he held everything we can to hold and control the sensation we are feeling right now. I can feel my heart is crying with nirvana the moment we embraced each other. There was no question, not even a doubt, neither a fright nor shame. I wanna give him my all, I know I should. I can feel my heart pounding, its beats no longer playing a rhythm. The ceiling I have perceived as real a clear sky, though it is just blue sky- painted china. We are in heaven. His eyes are crying out tears of joy. My breath speaks of bliss. Our trembling means serenity. I let out a lone tear the second I felt he’s inside me. My heart hopped a couple of beats. Just then I realized I’m so scared- not with the thought that this deed is wrong but with the fear of losing him. He knows it so he contained and kissed me to sponge those fears away, and he succeeded. Unknown aside from pleasure and serenity we are feeling. We made love for the first time in a bed full of magnolias under a clear cobalt sky. My views left me and it wondered into nothingness. Here am I in bed with the bloke I love resting his head on my breast, enfolding me while he’s asleep. There was no regret of where I’m supposed to be right now, but I’m so remorseful for things could be happening after this. After discerning things, I slowly escaped his tight embrace and warm body. This is the man I’m eager to share my life with. This is the life I want
65
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
to have and cherish, but I know I should end this because I can’t give him my whole life as I don’t own it too. As I stare at his face while holding his hands, I wept soundlessly and admitted the fact that I will never have this man. Forever is just a hard thing to attain when it comes to people of my kind. I kissed his palm and put it back around the pillow which he now embraces. I stood up and strode to face the mirror. I saw a lovely bare woman, a happy one for she has just found her utmost love. But her doppelgänger changed when I saw her letting out tears from her eyes. She is not a woman, not even close to a helpless child craving for an air after nearly drowning into a pool of crimson aqua. Right after turning my back on her, I searched for my sack and eventually pulled out a thing I will forever regret to have gotten out. I paced back to the bedside table and sat on the cushion- filled settee near it. Suddenly, Jerome moved numbly his body and faced me. His body is almost covered with magnolia petals. I immediately jumped up to the bed and hugged him tight, “I love you too,” I cried. I tightened my embrace to the hardness of his body and he did same, but later did he move back a little to seek what is it cooling his spine. But before he could recognize the thing I just embraced him with, I sat up to his stomach and pulled the trigger of the gun. I’m certain his heart received the bullet. I pulled the trigger for the second time, third and for the last time. His face is full of questions, mine were of regrets. Eventually, his tan eyes that sparkled during our love making dilated and gazed empty; mine watered for reasons I can’t figure out or for the reality I just can’t admit. His lips paled, but I sealed it with mine for seconds. I’m still staring at this breathless man lying in the bed now full of blood-splashed petals. No emotions are traced, just pure vacancy. My hands dropped the gun, and I slowly stepped on the turquoise floor. Am I still in heaven? I picked the plain white silk dress and wore it, covered it with the black leather jacket Jerome sported last night when he fetched me at home to bring me here. It was huge that it nearly sheltered my knees. For the last time, I faced the mirror. I pulled out a napkin and gently wore off the bloodstain on my face and neck. I am beautiful. I am perfect and I’m amiable as my name is. One final thing, I put on a glimmering crimson and a smile on my lips. I looked straight to the eyes of the woman in front of me, and we both saw hollowness. I’m ready to be married. Now.
66
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
D I B U H O
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Esther Digital Art
68
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Carcinoma Digital Art
69
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Abyss Pen & Ink
Paper Rock Scissors Pen & Ink
70
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Aquarius Mixed Media
71
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Insiduous Digital Art
72
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Pinocchio Digital Art
73
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Poso
Mixed media
74
T-square Pen & Ink
75
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Vintage Lass Mixed media
76
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Unroofed Mixed media
77
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Basiphobia Water color
78
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Untouched Color pencil
79
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Prismatic Strokes Color pencil
80
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Accountability Mixed media
81
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Blackmail Pen & Ink
82
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
THE BITERNESS OF MAN’S LIFE AND THE SWEETNESS OF GOD’S LOVE “…and wonder how He could love me, a sinner, condemned, unclean.” – Charles H. Gabriel
84
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Romans 3:23 – For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;
85
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Romans 6:23 – For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.
86
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Romans 5:8 – But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
87
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
John 3:16 – For God so loved the world, that he gave us his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
88
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
flying dutchman
Lazy
89 89
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Yamaha 90
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Oasis
You light up my world like nobody else
91
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Palayan
Patay na ang kabayo 92
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Titingala na lang ba? 93
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Eulogy
94
PABALAT
The Marian Loose Ink VII
Burlesque
Perched 95
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Platoon
Bright lights
96
Off We Go 97
De l’action graces:
THANK YOU to our advisers, Sir John and Ma’am Clara for the support and guidance all throughout! To MJC Press Corporation, to all the staff and Sir Mon Mojica. Allen: Salamat sa mga nagtiyaga. Sa mga Editors ko, TM junior and senior staffers. Congrats Willeth and Jay! Congrats din sa mga bumuo ng International magazine ng TM, Sam, Mikko and Hazel. Sa inyo na din Ryan, Lea and Reynaly. Haha. Sa mga nakatrabaho naming mga ‘models,’ naks.. sean, berna, ins and rhoel, sa mga Mr. and Ms. Campus Personality candidates, sa mga service groups, at sa lahat ng nasa pinaghirapan kong ilayout na magazine. Thank you sa mga juniors na natitira pa! Amazing kayo! Sa mge ever active, Razor, Paul and Marc.. Kay Gel, Ins, Budong, and Ellaine na din, na super active na seniors… Nananawagan ako kay Erwin Romulo, EIC ng Esquire Philippines, kunin niyo na akong Art Director.. Salamat din sa mga seniors ko dati at mga TM Alumni na, Ate Eira, Abeer, Rhoda, Mags and Rudz, Rebekah, Lily, Kuya Char Haha.. c Sa nanay at tatay ko, gagraduate din ako.. soon.. haha sa kapatid ko.. bespren ko. mars. lahat nang friends ko. archi family.tenkuuu. Rak en Rol! Sa lahat ng umattend ng the very first LIMBAGAN! you are all aweeeesoommmeee!!! :] Willeth <3: ( please read !pagbigyan niyo nako, last ko na to ) Finally. Eto na. Sa wakas! Matapos iPush ng bonggang bongga at mangstress ng EIC, editors at staff, boom! Fruit Folio! Oo na. Reyna na talaga ako ng prutas! And I’m proud of it! Haha. Salamat sa buong MARIAN family, Kay Sir John, Mam Clara, salamat po. Sa mama KO( love you ma!) Sa official layout artist ng folio, Jay! Apir! Arki family,thesis mates(konting push nalang din!), MARSIANS‘08( miss ko na kayong LAHAAAT), BFF( uwi kana <3 ), hew family( oh bat nasingit kayo dito? Haha) at sa lahat ng sumusubaybay , nag aabang, pumipila ,at nagagalit ‘pag nauubusan ng copies ng literary folio! Salamat sa inyo. Above all, Thankyou Lord, salamat ng marami.. This is for You :D Angelica: syempre thank you kay God kasi kung wala Siya, wala din ang mga talents na bumubuo sa folio na toh. Thank you din sa mama’t papa ko dahil kung wala sila, wala din ako na gumagawa ng thank you letter na ito. Thank you din sa mga pamangkin kong sina Alou, Inna, Lilac at Yuan na nagbibigay sa akin ng inspiration. And most of all thank you The Marian family for giving me the opportunity to showcase my talent. (whe? Talent nga ba?)
Jay D ;) hasteeg at hamaazing.. naman at natapos din itong ...ikapitong pampanitikang folio namen. kasakit kea sa ulo ang maglapat, na nagdulot ng itim na creater sa’king mga mata.. haha ngunit sa kabilang dako ng daigdig nandun ang mars, jupiter, saturn, uranuuus, neptune at... ay teka balik muna tayo sa earth.. ahem! ahem! sa usaping pandaigdigan? nagpapasalamat ako kay Dora, Diego at kay Doots o di ba (D) lahat,haha at sa kadahilanang pag-iinspire sa’king magexplore gamit ang kaibigan kong c google map/earth..haha tibay! at dahil dito nagagalak akong makita ang folio namen yeeey..anu daw? haha and please LIKE us on Facebook :D Teka... seryoso na nga. Anyway THANK YOU sa lahat lahat lahat aun andame eh kaya lahat lahat lahat na lang hahaha.... i love you all mga Marians, BSCE-4 at kay papa, mama, kapatid at kay buko hehe :3 Oliver: sa mga magulang ko…sa nanay at tatay ko, sa kapatid ko, b2ng! RAKenROL! Kay PaD na nagpapahiram ng wacom! Haha..tiiibbbayy! kay kuya Allen at sa buong TM family... boom! At sa’yo na walang sawang sumusubaybay sa mga walang kakwenta-kwentang kalokohan ni budong…salamat! sa mga taong nandyan para saken, sa mga nagbibigay ng inspirasyon(waaa…andami niyo! Haha) asahan niyo ang patuloy na kalupitan ng mga obra ko…pangHARDCORE ang peg! ORAYT!! :)
Samantha Chedrick: Salamat sa pagbasa mo nito, dahil ito na ang entry ko. LOL.. Maniwala sa Law of attraction! Stay positive :D It might be stormy now, but it won’t rain forever. Sa darlingsssss ko, maghihiwalay din tayo. Haha. Sana mahalin kayo ng mga magiging amo niyo. Thank you Mommy, Daddy, Anjo, Anjik, Biboy, Mac-mac, and pupsy. Oo, kahit malaki na aso namin-ung nanay nung puppies, ‘puppy’ pa din siya. Ewan ko ba kung bakit ‘di na namin naisipang pangalanan siya. Thank you Kristine! Final year na natin! Thank you MUST, scientists! Sa lahat ng nagpangiti, nagpaiyak, at nanggalit sa akin. Gift kayong lahat ni Lord. TM pipol, stay OSAM! >.<
Vanessa: @#^&+%$!!!! PAALALA po, hindi ito mura. Sadyang hindi ko lang matagpuan ang mga salita upang pasalamatan ang THE MARIAN (TM) na aking pamilya. Dito ko talaga natagpuan ang sarili ko. Siguro kung bawat oras kasama ko ang TM pipol, mangangayayat ako kasi mauubos ang energy ko sa katatawa! Promise! At buong pasasalamat ko kay kuya ALLEN ESTEBAN, our EIC, niligtas mo ako, at talagang uber dedicated ka sa The Marian. Bottomline is, I LOVE YOU ALL TM PEEPZ! You all complete and rock my world! Woohoo!
Ellaine: Congratulations to our fabulous lit editor, Ate Willeth, the rest of The MARIAN family, and to the Marians who shared their literary talent for making this folio come to life! Anyway… To my daddy, mommy, Irene, Greg and the rest of my ohana, thank you for your support and inspiration. To my SHS family, especially my girls- Stephie, Dear, Unnie and El- thank you for all the laughs and fun times. And above all, thank you Lord! Te Amo! Muah! MARC: Una sa lahat, Maraming thank you kay Papa God. Maraming thank you din sa aking pamilya na palaging nariyan para sumuporta saakin, sa kuya ko, sa papa ko, sa lola ko at sa mama ko na alam kong proud na proud sa akin kahit siya’y nasa itaas na. Maraming salamat din sa mga The MARIAN staff at lalong lalo na kay kuya Joe Allen Mark Esteban in short BOSS MASTER EDITORIN-CHIEF ng THE MARIAN! Maraming salamat kasi tinanggap mo ako sa The MARIAN kahit 2nd semester ako sumali. Maraming salamat na rin sa lahat ng staff, salamat sa kulitan at kabagtitan. HAHA! RAKENROL lang tayo palagi!, Maraming salamat din sa mga classmates ko, teachers ko. “COE GAMIN” at maraming maraming salamat din sa aking inspirasyon na palaging nariyan at palaging sumusuporta. MARAMING SALAMAT sa inyong lahat. Ooooh Amazing ang haba na pala, Saka na lang yung iba! HAHA AMAZZZIIING! AWESOOOOMMMEEEE!! RAKENROL! WOOOOOOOSH! LESRAAAAAAK! EPIIIIIIC! WOOOOOOOOOOO!! Razor: Thank you kay God! Amen, amen, amen... salamat sa lahat ng tao (mga kakilala, nakakakilala at mga taong kakilala ko pero di ako kakilala), bagay at lugar na sumuporta sa akin. Sa oras at panahon na ginugugol, sa lakas at pagod. Salamat. Tsaka ko lang natutunang mapait ang tubig na may sabon.
Paul : Thank you to all the persons who supported me... Specially my EIC for encouraging me to be the best that i can be... And also to my co-staffers... And to my college friends... And to you who is reading this.
Mundanes, mortals of this ruined nefarious vale, hearken my voice, As I walk to this southern plains, as mirages lay sweltering in the brassy afternoon sunlight, rebounding frantic carols: “Clench your teeth, let the yellowish froth drool from your thirst!” And I hand you drupes of madness. Now, kneel before them. The gods, the sullen and bedraggled gods who shall be destroyed. To Mama, we shall live. To the MARIAN, we shall rise. To Kelvin, Jowel, Alma, Apel, we shall triumph. To Luna, you shall be dethroned.
frenielovich
Wrix: Maraming salamat kay God, sa family ko, churchmates, classmates at mga kaibigan :-)
Reynaly: To my Big Boss up there, my King, thank you po! To the STARS of my life: To my family (mama, papa, babs!, christian, gel)… to my bestestpren-apiit na laging nagkicritic sa appearance ko…to Luke…to Trans4mars Family…to my bitterettes/girlfriends na patuloy pa rin sa pagpapalaganap ng kabitter-an(RIBAbe, Aizasweetie, Klaydlabs)…to Monte Family(to honey marlon at sa mga anakis ko. Haha. ) …to SOA friends (beknats, oldics, char, hazelnut, cess)…to COCO diehard fans (ipagpatuloy ang kabaliwan)...kay Valix! Gaad. Thanks din sa mga mentors ko nung elem & high school (mam basilio & mam rana ng BCS na unang nagturo sa ‘kin ng campus journ, mam sierra & sir jun ng nvg). Siyempre to my The MARIAN family (you rock and roll. lol): kay Kua Allen na ‘di nagsasawa sa mga late kong DevCom (wink wink), TM Editors, Chiefs, lahat ng staffers at kina Sir John and Mam Clara…to TM-worms na walang sawang tumatangkilik sa The MARIAN…Maraming maraming salamat po sa ‘di nabibiling inspirasyon! Ma-touch kayo! Haha. Congrats Ate Willeth! **For what is essential is invisible to the eyes. LEA: Hello Ate Willeth! Kamusta naman ang ‘FRUIT of your labor?’ LITERALLY!! Haha. Congrats! Salamat kay Lord! Salamat sa family ko. Salamat sa Abengs! (uyy ABENGers na tayo ngayon! Level Up!!) Salamat din kay October Faith sa partisipasyon. Syempre sa Quatro Marxano din, at lalo na sa The Marian Staff, kay Sir John at Ma’am Clara. <Pappoi!!>
hazel.panget: Eto na ang nag-iisa kong contribution sa polyo! Salamats ate wileyt sa ispeys ko kahit eto na lang nag-iisang obra ko kaya gagalingan ko.hoho.(oy, wag ka.nag-edit naman ako ‘no.binasa ko lahat.at nastress ako tapos napuyat pa.haha) :p. Syemperds, pers of ol, all these are for Ür greater glory, Daddy Lord. Salamat, nasurvive ko ang 1st sem. Sa mga anak ng Diyos sa bahay-mama@papa@joash@hannah (At ako,syempre nomon.haha.). Iloveü..smu-cru – kuya tipen.jom.moises.imee.bane.ate azalea, cpa (nay :D).ate mae-ann.ate may@ lahat ng cru sa biskaya at ifugao at sa mundo-may we live to witness til everyone knows someone who truly follows Jesus.GbÜ.. nlpyf family-agbalin bendisyon, isu laeng panggep [tayo] kahit saan man tayo dadatong. Haha. God bless you. jon foreman, yiruma, switchfoot en the afters-wag kayong mag-alala, lagi kayo sa memory card ko.haha..TM tolspasensiya na. ngarag ang man.ed. niyo eh.wala tayong magagawa.haha . :p.lüvyoopipols.. at uuy, hello.yeah, you.thanks for grabbing a copy of loose ink.. AT johnmark tayaban.xP!, ’ey, thanks for being mature when i’m not :P :) K3Ü ! :* @ ikaw ulet: Thank you for reading this long dedication. Sipag ah.Tibaaay! xD
The Marian Loose Ink VII
PABALAT
Loose Ink VII THE MARIAN
email us at smu.themarian@gmail.com Like us on Facebook www.facebook.com/themarian.smu