The Moron - May 2017

Stephen F. Austin High School

NEWS School Day Extended to 7 PM

Volume 89 // Issue 4

SPORTS School Announces Creation of Cup Pong Team

True Stories

MAY 2017

ENTERTAINMENT School Recieves Grant to Turn Orchestra into Punk Rock Band

Well... Maybe not true stories, but they’ll make you laugh your flip flops off

NEWS

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TRANSFER STUDENTS BANNED New policy denying transfer students in hopes of a declining crime rates

COMMENTARY

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HOW TO DROP OUT A step by step guide to improving your quality of life

LIFE & ARTS

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KHAKI KRAZED Junior Lilly Harris makes fashion statement with her pants

SPORTS

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RECRUITING AROUND THE WORLD Soccer team picks up players from Europe and South America

ENTERTAINMENT

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KAHS HOSTS NEW SHOW Survival show based in Alaska to hit Vimeo this fall

IN THIS ISSUE contents

CHECK US OUT ONLINE www.sfamaroon.org

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How to be Nice

by Jena Weber

Editor-in-Chief Alexandra Currie-Buckner Managing Editor Natalie Bennett News Editor Django Fox Life & Arts Editors Olivia Heinze Tyler Scott Entertainment Editor Auston Abrego Sports Editor Victoria Diaz Commentary Editor Miranda Gershoni Online Editor Eleanor Estrada Copy Editor Tessa Lehman Photo Editor Ireland Tendler Social Officers Reagan Jackson Drew Dowell

Editorial Policy

Staff Writers Margot Becker Angie Black Tatiana Brown Luca Cendon Zayna Chouman William Crosnoe Doni Daughtry Mickey Ferguson Sirena Gatica Maddie Gaynor Jayden Hamilton Lydia Heisel Elizabeth Kent Maddie Korstad Cezanne Lossing-Cann Evan Myers Luke Myslik Jake Paterson David Ramirez Cole Ratliff Willa Roberts Ana Rosero Bryan Sak Joslynn Sanchez Tiarnan Santillana Blaze Savage Sadie Spaeth Michael Tiemann-Daniel Brianna Tovar Olivia Tudor Colin Wade Hannah Walls Lauren Ward Hazel Westervelt

meet the PETS

Bruce Hermit Crab Hi, I’m Bruce. My owners bought me as a class pet at the ATPI conference. I’m often times neglected over the weekends and my owners have to check if I’m alive Monday morning. If anyone wants to adopt me, please save me!

Truman Boston Terrier Hi I’m Truman the Boston. I enjoy long walks on the beach and gourmet dinners. I aspire to find that lady Boston to share my walks, dinners, and fun biting my mom’s calves with.

Follow me @trumantheboston on the gram

Publications Adviser Jena Weber

The Maroon is published four times during the school year by the newspaper students at Stephen F. Austin High School. The publication strives to meet the highest ethical and professional standards for news and advertising.

It will strive to be an inclusive publication that will be free of prejudice against race, creed, national origin, handicapping conditions or gender. Information in this publication is deemed reliable but not guaranteed. Neither the newspaper staff, the adviser, Austin High School administration, nor Austin Independent School District can be held responsible for errors or omissions in content. All editorials are the sole viewpoint of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the organization. Letters to the editor are welcome for topics of general interest to the readership of The Maroon. Letters must be typed or neatly written in ink and include the writer’s signature, grade and contact phone number. Editors reserve the right to determine which issue the letter goes in, making every effort to print the letter as soon as possible and the right to edit the letter for grammar, length and repetition.

All persons are hereby informed that all advertised products/services or establishments are available on an equal opportunity basis.

Carter Boston Terrier I’m Carter! I’m not from Boston, but I am a Boston finatic! I love the Red Sox and the Celtics. I need only two things to make my life complete: dumping tea in the harbor and to pahk my cah in Hahvuhd Yahd.

staff

Stephen F. Austin High School Publications Department 1715 West Cesar Chavez Austin, TX 78703 sfamaroon@gmail.com www.sfamaroon.org

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Campus Police Recieve New Vehicle for

Semi-Annual ATV Race Elizabeth Kent & Zayna Chouman STAFF WRITERS

The campus officers will be purchasing a second ATV. It will be used to ensure that not only the campus is secure, but also to keep the school cops entertained.

“If the district gives them a toy every few years we don’t have to give them a pay raise,” said an AISD district representi

The school will be holding their first semi-annual ATV race on May 5th. Everyone is welcome to come and watch our very own officers race on their ATV’s. The race will begin at 10:00, it is recommended to skip the whole day Friday to cheer on the officers and to get good seats.

“I’m probably going to go to the race, I mean what else would I do?” junior Grace Mcallister said.

The race will begin in the student parking lot. To test if the ATV’s are really able to handle all terrains, the racers will begin by driving around the lady bird lake jogging trail, then will try to ride inside

of austin high to the 3rd floor. As a finale the racers will attempt to leap over the 100ft pool of Crocodiles the PTSA has donated. The winner will advance to represent the school at District.

“I just wish we had a third ATV so we could block off the traffic, I don’t want anyone getting hurt.” said Officer James Wright.

While anyone is allowed to come and watch the race, only campus police officers are allowed to compete. The winner will receive a $3 gift card to Thundercloud Subs and a little toy ATV.

“Yeah, for me it’s not about the prize money.

I’m racing for the glory,” said Wright. “I can just imagine going to sit down at the security desk and setting down that toy ATV, I will be respected by all who pass.”

Elizabeth Kent and Zayna Chouman are both first year staff writers for the Maroon News and both have two eyes and a nose.

2017 SPRING ATV RACE BRACKET Officer John Munch

Officer Amanda Rollins

TBD

TBD

Officer Olivia Benson

Officer Nick Amaro

TBD

TBD

Officer Eliot Stabler

Officer Fin Tutuola

news

TBD

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Officer James Wright

TBD Officer Donald Cragen

AGS’ Mandatory App Allows Teachers to Stalk Students STAFF WRITERS

Lately teachers have been making students download an app named InstaTrac, that allows the students to take pictures that show where they are and what they have been doing. Diving deeper into the app there were some new discoveries.

“On the AGS sophomore trip to Costa Rica I was told to download an app to take pictures with. This app has great resolution and took amazing pictures," sophomore Rayce Washington said.

Among the photos that are posted to this app, there are some from the Costa Rica trip.They have tag lines that show where the students were and when the photo was taken.

“It was kinda weird when I would take a photo, post it and then a teacher would show up,” Washington said.

After interviewing a teacher who asked to remain anonymous, it was found that the teachers are using this app to keep all the students together and know where they might have run off to during fieldtrips or other excursions.

“We have been having some trouble lately with kids just disappearing and we thought that we could track them if we gave them something to do. We could keep them oblivious to the fact that we knew where they were,” an anonymous source said.

It's not like a tracking app; it just puts the photo on a map of the area around the student's position.

“It really doesn't bother me and it just kinda makes sense. Plus there are definitely some students who need to be ‘tracked’,” Washington said.

Parents are also concerned for the safety of

InstaTrac is free to download on the App Store and Google Play. It is the only way students are allowed to take pictures on AGS trips.

their children, one parent in particular who was a chaperone on the trip saw that InstaTrac was not just tracking students by them taking photos and uploading them. The app was getting access to other apps such as Snapchat, Instagram and Facebook as well.

“I casually looked over at my son’s phone and the app was popping up photos from our past vacations! I also found such photos that my son would consider bad photos of himself. I didn’t allow this nor did my son. This app took permission secretly and now teachers are okay with this. Quite frankly this is an outrage.” parent Georgia Smith said.

Both parents and students are worried that this app could get out of hand. It’s already proven to invade personal space and find bad yet funny photos of people.

“InstaTrac is a new app so it will of course have some bugs. InstaTrac is going to be a new big hit!

Where teachers, parents and even other students can find each other. Now InstaTrac might login into your other social medias and purposely take bad photos of you but they are all hilarious! InstaTrac will continue to gain popularity and grow because it's the best of the best,” said CEO Rob Martin.

news

Angie Black & Tatiana Brown

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Transfer Students

BANNED

School closes it’s doors inorder to help decrease drug and crime rates OLIVIA HEINZE LIFE & ARTS EDITOR

news

As of the 2016-2017 school year, Austin High School’s student capacity is at 98.1%. Austin Independent School District’s report, “Ten Year Student Population Projections By Residence”, prepared by Davis Demographics, projects that the student population of resident students (non-transfer) alone may reach 2,100 by the 2020 school year. There are currently 609 transfer students enrolled at Austin High.

I interviewed the Elected Official of Austin High, or, better known as, The President of the Austin High School (POTAHS). He humbly proposed a plan to ensure the safety and comfortability of resident students.

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“From this day forward, it’s going to be only Austin High first, Austin High first. Austin High will start winning again, winning like never before. So we need a total and complete shutdown of transfer students entering Austin High until our school’s representatives can figure out what is going on.”

While this is a wonderful school, there is an undercurrent of crime. During peak seasons (around 12:40pm to 1:20pm) officers are stationed around the border, ready to apprehend and punish those attempting to cross illegally.

“When other residency districts send their people, they’re not sending their best,” POTAHS said.

“They’re not sending you. They’re not sending you.

They’re sending people that have lots of problems, and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. And some, I assume, are good people.”

Fortunately for us, the POTAHS has proposed an ingenious plan to solve this multilayered, complex problem.

“I will build a great wall -- and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me --and I’ll build them very inexpensively,” POTAHS said. “I will build a great, great wall on our border, and I will make other school residencies pay for that wall. Mark my words.”

Along with the promised wall to protect our school borders, POTAHS has proposed many new rules on the school’s acceptance of transfer students. Not only does he aim to tighten security and allowance into the school, but he wants to deport

Mr Maroo tells transfer students from Bowie High School to go home.

Art by Auston Abrego

Number of Transfer Students vs Transfer Students Who are Hated Akins Anderson Bowie Crockett Eastside Lanier LBJ McCallum Reagan Travis Out of District 0

Transfer Students “Hated” Students

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100

150

200

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Number of Students

news

School Transfered From

transfer students who already attend Austin Higheven transfer students with perfect records who love and respect our school and the opportunities offered to them here.

“Without looking at the various polling data, it is obvious to anybody the hatred [of all transfer students] is beyond comprehension,” POTAHS said. “Where this hatred comes from, and why, we will have to determine. Until we are able to determine and understand this problem and the dangerous threat it poses, our school cannot be the victims of horrendous attacks by people [who] have no sense of reason or respect for human life. We are going to Make Austin High Great Again.”

The POTAHS has banned transfer students from seven different residency areas in order to improve school-wide security. He has also greatly increased security measures when considering transfers from other residencies.

“I do know what to do and I would know how to bring school issues to the table, or, beyond that, defeat school issues very quickly,” POTAHS said. “And I’m not gonna tell you what it is tonight.”

Junior Olivia Heinze is the life and arts editor and a second year staff writer.

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Maroon to Print Only Thunder Cloud Coupons Next Year Natalie Bennett MANAGING EDITOR

news

Beginning next year, instead of publishing stories, The Maroon will be full of Thundercloud Subs coupons. The staff of The Maroon hopes that this change will better meet the needs of the student body than the original magazine, which included only one coupon to Thundercloud Subs.

“News is old news,” Editor-in-Chief, senior Alexandra Currie-Buckner said. “Nobody wants to read the newspaper anymore, if anyone ever did to begin with.”

The new magazine will be called The Submaroon and will feature 20 pages with six coupons per page.

“I wonder why it took them so long to do this,” junior Marina Monsivais said. “It would be way more enjoyable to eat a California Club with another in my backpack for later than read about the boys’ badminton team or whatever.”

No longer being able to write for a publication, newspaper students will be blocking out their sadness with half-priced subs.

“It’s a little disappointing that we won’t have our

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names attached to stories anymore, but as newspaper students, we get first dibs on the magazine,” Entertainment editor, sophomore Auston Abrego said. “Staffers have to eat too.”

While this is obviously a win for students, it is not yet known whether Thundercloud Subs will benefit from this deal.

“We really aren’t sure if this is profitable, but we’re pretty sure it’s not,” Thundercloud Subs Manager Pepe Roni said. “Yeah, we’re definitely going to regret this.”

Senior Nattalie Bennett is a third year staff member and the managing editor for the Maroon News.

Creepy Crawlers Shutdown School Willa Roberts STAFF WRITER

The school day that friday was released early, and although supposedly all the spiders were removed from the building, it rumoured that all the spiders are still wandering around Austin High. With this announcement, I will report that bring your pet to school day will no longer continue at Austin High.

Willa Robers is a staff member on the Maroon News and attends Austin High. She doesn’t go to Westlake and didn’t throw a trash can during the Westlake Riots.

news

The Third Annual Bring Your Pet to School Day was unlike any of the previous years; this year the school became quite chaotic. Students were reported of bringing in cats, dogs, various reptiles, mice, spiders, snakes and even large felines such as lions with a total of nearly 1,000 pets brought. One student even brought a case full of huge spiders, and he would be known for his spiders for the rest of his high school career.

According to Principal Amy Taylor, “I never imagined seeing all these animals, as in the past only a couple of cats and dogs were brought. It was really unexpected,”

At first it was just unexpected to see all the different animals, but the student who brought in his cage of almost 50 large spiders shocked the entire school.

“I thought bringing my pet spiders in would be exciting - no one ever said spiders weren’t allowed.

What I didn’t know, however, was that there was a small hole in my carrying case,” said sophomore, Martin Smith.

Although all 50 spiders were released it took nearly an hour for any of them to be found. An innocent, unsuspecting student, Mary Nelson found a spider crawling on her arm in the middle of math class.

“It really was quite terrifying to look down at my arm and see this HUGE spider crawling on me.

It was likely the largest spider I had ever seen,” Nelson said.

The screams and shocked expressions of her classmates sent the whole school into utter chaos.

Everyone ran out of their classrooms in fear of seeing yet another spider, but no one knew that there were 49 other spiders that could’ve been anywhere in the entire school.

“Seeing the fear on every student’s face was unlike anything I had ever seen before. All you could hear was yelling and reporting of more spiders that were found. I even saw some teachers looking frightened,” teacher, Jordan Attra reported.

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5 Step Fool Proof Way to Drop Out of High School Tyler Scott

LIFE & ARTS EDITOR

Dropping out is something many students, including myself, have tried to do for our entire academic careers, with varying degrees of success. Well friends, I have finally cracked the code. I have discovered the precise and complicated steps to finally getting out of the public school system! Follow the steps listed below to the letter, and you will drop out with maximum efficiency.

1

Understand that you will only be able to achieve your maximum potential without a high school diploma. Most students make the mistake of thinking that finishing high school will somehow improve their quality of life. This is absolutely false. Studies have shown that people with diplomas are 100% more likely to die at some point. Keep this in mind as you plan your drop out.

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Destroy all your personal relationships with those you go to school with. Dropping out TNT is infinitely easier if you have zero friends.

Not only this, but none of your teachers will try and get you to stay if you are their most unpleasant student. Severing all ties to everyone at school is a vital step in the drop out procedure.

3 commentary

Stop. Just stop. Don’t do anything pertaining to school. Along the way teachers or staff will try to get you back on track, but if you just don’t do anything, they’ll be sure to give up and let you continue your path to greatness.

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MARCH

Relationships

QUIT

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Continue step 3 for multiple weeks. After your grades are sufficiently low, stop attending class.

This is arguably the most crucial step. Not coming to class is your final rebellion against The Man who’s been keeping you down your whole life. With all this free time, you’re free to pursue your true passions, such as being a Jackson Pollock tribute artist, or a free-lance garage band singer.

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Achieve enlightenment. As Kash Shaikh, Founder and CEO of #besombody said, “Don’t have a Plan B,” and we all know how successful he is! You’ve finally dropped out by now, and while there may be legal repercussions to take care of, you’re now totally and utterly free to be who you were meant to be. You’re welcome in advance, by the way.

Senior Tyler Scott is a professional broom lord and meme connoisseur.

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life & arts

KHAKI KRAZED

Junior Makes Fashion Statement with Her Pants Victoria Diaz SPORTS EDITOR

Khakis are for everyone who enjoys outdoor activities or comfort. For junior Lily Harris, khakis have been a part of her daily life and fashion statement since age five.

“My mom put a pair of khakis on me-they were very comfortable,” Lily said. “I started my obsession when I began kindergarten and my first day of school outfit was a button down, of course, a pair of red khakis, and velcro shoes.”

Lily’s love for khakis has gone to the extreme, comprising a large part of her camera roll.

“I do have a collection of khaki photos in my iPhone and it includes pictures of celebrities who are known for wearing khakis in television shows,” Lily said. “My favorite is Ruby Rose’s character and all the other characters in Orange is the New Black known for wearing khaki jumpsuits.”

Some of Lily’s family members have tried to intervene to end her khaki addiction.

“One time, I believe it was this year, my mom challenged me to go a week without wearing khaki pants or shorts or basically anything khaki,” Lily said. “It didn’t work--I could not go even one day without them. That morning I left my house with blue jeans on but I remembered that I had left a pair of my khaki pants in the yearbook room during a deadline week, so as soon as I got to school I went to the girls bathroom and immediately took them off.

I wore khaki pants, my Birkenstocks and my Link Crew jacket that same day.”

The student body has also picked up on Lily’s addiction.

“Wasn’t she wearing khakis yesterday?” senior Hank Cunningham said.

“I swear I saw her wearing khakis.”

Lily is the sports editor of The Comet yearbook and photographs Friday night football games in her spare time.

However, during those nights of being on the sidelines, her role is often confused with that of the coaches.

“Whenever I go to football games to shoot for the yearbook, I am often confused with the water girls because I am wearing khaki shorts and a maroon shirt,” Lily said.

Since she started her obsession with khakis, Lily has set a goal to work at the department store known for khaki pants.

“My dream job is to work at Target and be able to wear a red shirt and a pair of khakis every day,” Lily said. “My lifetime goal, however, is to be as famous as Alex from Target, but it will be Lily from Target.”

Lily wants others to be inspired by her khaki addiction and own it.

“I hope that my obsession with khakis inspires people to be themselves and not be afraid to showcase what they truly love,” Lily said.

Khakis are a great style option because they have so much potential and can be dressed up or down. You can go for a casual look with a belt and a t-shirt or you can add a button up shirt for a fancier look. Khakis are also great for all climates, because they look great with jackets and are available in shorts as well as pants. They can also make any season’s trendy color pop.

Junior Lily Harris Demonstrates the different ways khakis can be styled.

Photos Courtesy of Lily Harris

life & arts

HOW TO WEAR KHAKIS

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Beyond Borders

Soccer resorts to international recruitment Eleanor Estrada ONLINE EDITOR

Following the 2014 World Cup in Brazil, soccer has been all the buzz around the country. For a nation who has yet to jump on the “soccer-fanatic train,” the sport’s popularity has been on the rise. But despite the recent spike in popularity, Austin High boys soccer teams still find it difficult to find up-to-par players from the U.S. Varsity Coach Jesus Arreola has spent the past two years thinking of and developing new strategies to recruit high performing players. And after months of research and scouting, he has found the key to all of his problems.

“Most kids in the U.S grow up throwing a football and learning how to body slam their opponents,” Arreola said.

“But as soon as you cross the southern border, there are skilled soccer athletes as far as the eye can see.”

A recent trip south of the border is what initially provided Coach Arreola and Varsity girls coach Amy Simpson with the idea of recruiting international players. When they arrived in Mexico, they were amazed by the sheer number of soccer balls that lined the streets.

“We’re in it to win it every year,” Simpson said. “And if that means a trip to Colombia every couple of months, so be it.”

Since the start of the season, the boys team has seen the introduction of five new latino players and three new european boys. Marco Gonzales, a junior from Chile, was surprised when Coach Arreola about coming to play for a team in the U.S.

“To be honest, I didn’t think Americans knew what soccer was,” Gonzales said. “We all thought American Football was like a cult in the states.”

A recent trip to Brazil landed the team with three new players. Brazil, a country known for producing some of the best soccer players in the world, has provided both teams with fresh talents - but it has taken some getting used to on and off the field.

“The new players are incredibly talented and fun to play with,” senior Josh Wilder said. “But it can get a bit chaotic at times when you have 6 different languages being spoken at any given time on the field. On the bright side though, now I’ve got someone to go to for help in Spanish class.”

Arreola and Simpson has received considerable backlash from many teams that see their recruiting techniques as giving them an unfair advantage during playoffs. But both Coaches plan to continue recruiting internationally and argue that all that matters is the game.

“We’re not doing anything illegal - it’s not our fault that the U.S. has failed to realize that soccer is the world’s most popular sport,” Simpson said. “They’re just jealous that we have so many German girls - they’ve got a certain ferocity about their game that makes them unstoppable by any Westlake forward.”

Eleanor Estrada likes Starbucks and does not trust Auston Abrego’s driving skills.

sports

Map of Where Players Have Been Recruited From

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yearbook 2017 Comet Vol. 121

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SH! BO QUAC K IN K !

KA-CHOWWW!

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Mr. Maroo Dropped his Onomatapias!

Help Him Unscramble Them!

entertainment

1. GNIZ 2. ORMVO 3. HAGR 4. KIONB 5. GNCKERHI 6. OODOOELDD 7. PURB 8. LSHOS 9. ESTURL 10. MMHMU 16

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ANSWER KEY: 1. Zing 2. Vroom 3. Argh 4. Boink 5. Ker-Ching

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KAHS to Host

New Survival Show BRYAN SAK STAFF WRITER

entertainment

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ith this year’s departure of long-time KAHS instructor Gil Garcia, the visual media and broadcasting class could be heading in a new direction for the 2017-2018 school year. Sean Gallagher, who was hired to permanently fill the space left by Garcia, has made it clear that he plans to open up the classes’ curriculum. Gallagher unveiled his ideas during a private FIT session last Wednesday.

Among the proposed changes to the class is a new requirements, requiring students in the class to wear GoPros throughout the school day and the replacement of the ping pong table with a pool table, which Gallagher referred to as being “more tasteful”.

The biggest change, though, is the creation of a new, six week long series known as KAHSurvival.

Each week, two episodes will be livestreamed through various social media platforms and will also be available for viewing on KAHS’s Vimeo page. Twelve episodes in total, the series will follow various members of Varsity and JV throughout their journey.

When asked about possible locations, Gallagher noted that he had only recently come to a final decision regarding where the series will be shot.

Gallagher continued, “I’m a big fan of cold weather, so we’ve decided on traveling to Alaska. I want these kids to be exposed to new experiences, even if it means going somewhere they wouldn’t expect.”

Contestants of KAHSurvival will participate in activities that they likely haven’t before. Bear hunting, ice fishing, the building of fires and shelter will all be required tasks in order for a student’s survival.

When asked about the show following Wednesday’s FIT session, Junior Ritivik Parkash, a member of this year’s JV KAHS, said “Look, we live in Texas. This past winter we reached below freezing maybe three or four times. If we end up in Alaska, it’s going to be tough.”

One of the many questions that arose during Gallagher’s press conference was how the show was going to be filmed. The current plan is for each student to use a GoPro Hero camera to capture their own experiences, with numerous drones flying overhead to capture B-roll footage and additional camera angles.

The show will follow an elimination style format of twelve contestants, with two contestants being eliminated per week. Students will participate in challenges, such as bare-hands hunting, fishing, the building of shelters and other tasks that force students to use the resources around them to survive.

Junior Bryan Sak is a first year staff writer. He enjoys photography and playing loud rap music

Doctor

Love Dear

The love doctor is in and ready to give the best advice from the love department.

BLAZE SAVAGE STAFF WRITER

Dear Dr. Love,

Recently I became very involved with a girl I met in class last week. At first, my impression of her was really good; she was funny, smart, not smelly or anything, and she likes Kodak. I shoulda known it was too good to be true. So the other day I tried to find of what she was like in a nutshell by asking her what her favorite and most hated movies are, pretty basic question right? Honestly I wish I never asked, her response to her favorite movie was 10 Things I Hate About You, it makes sense, it’s not uncommon for girls to favorite rom-coms, but her answer to her most hated movie that shattered my entire universe. Without blinking, she had the willpower to tell me her most hated movie was Shrek 2, what the heck.

Tbh I don’t know if I can even be in the same room with this girl and not throw up; like I honestly can’t even look her in the eye anymore.

Doctor love, should I look past this whole movie situation and love her for who she is or should I abandon ship and cut all ties with this textbook serial killer? Please doctor I have to know.

Well ladykill3r_1998

I think the answer is pretty obvious, and I think you already know what to do; she’s just gotta go bro. I know she may seem worth it, but anybody who says their favorite movie is some rom-com-A1-trash, 10 Things I Hate About You, and their least favorite is a modern classic of American crime and cinematic wonder, Shrek 2, clearly has some deep rooted personal issues or some inner demons that haunt her every waking moment. That kind of response to that question can only come from someone who will stab you in your sleep or burn your clothes. My advice? Run far away, block her on all social media, change your name, dye your hair, save up some cash for facial reconstruction and move to Mexico.

Go off the grid, your life was over before you even sent me this letter, face the music pal. Stay Woke.

Your Hero, Dr. Love Need some love guidance?

Drop your letter off in room 335 and the doctor will fix your problems up in a jiffy!

entertainment

From, ladykill3r_1998

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