Metro Spirit 01.09.2003

TROPOL

2003

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www.metspirit.com

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Contents SUNDAY BRUNCH The Metropolitan Spirit

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JANUARY 9-15, 2003 • FREE WEEKLY • METSPIRIT.COM

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Music by George Sykes Buzz Clifford Rob Foster

ON THE COVER

Another $6,000,000: Is The Golf Hall of Fame Worth It? By Brian Neill ...........12

Complimentary Champagne and Mimosas after 12:30 pm

Cover Design: Natalie Holle Photo: Brian Neill

FEATURE

The Weird Wild Web By Rhonda Jones ..........................................................16

Whine Line ......................................................................4 Thumbs Up, Thumbs Down ..........................................4 This Modern World ........................................................4 Clyde Wells Cartoon .......................................................4 Suburban Torture ...........................................................6 Words ..............................................................................7 Commentary ...................................................................8 Austin Rhodes ................................................................9 Insider ...........................................................................10

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Movie Listings .............................................................26 Review: “About Schmidt” ............................................28 Review: “Just Married” ...............................................29 Movie Clock ..................................................................29

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New Year’s Eve a Silent Night on Some Fronts .........30 Music By Turner ............................................................32 Nightlife .........................................................................33

Stuff News of the Weird ........................................................35 Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ......................................36 New York Times Crossword Puzzle ............................36 Amy Alkon: The Advice Goddess ................................37 Classifieds .....................................................................38 Date Maker ...................................................................39 Automotive Classifieds ................................................41

EDITOR & PUBLISHER David Vantrease ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Rhonda Jones STAFF WRITERS Stacey Eidson, Brian Neill ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Joe White ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Kriste Lindler, Jennifer H. Mar tin PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Smith GR APHIC ARTISTS Stephanie Carroll, Natalie Holle ASSISTANT TO THE PUBLISHER Meli Gurley RECEPTIONIST/CLASSIFIED COORDINATOR Sharon King ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Lisa Jordan CIRCULATION DIRECTOR Meli Gurley SENIOR MUSIC CONTRIBUTOR Ed Turner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Chuck Shepherd, Rob Brezsny, Austin Rhodes, Amy Alkon, Rachel Deahl CARTOONISTS Tom Tomorrow, Julie Larson

THE METROPOLITAN SPIRIT is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks of the year. Editorial coverage includes ar ts, local issues, news, enter tainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum. The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers. Visit us at www.metspirit.com. Copyright © The Metropolitan Spirit Inc. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited.

Phone: (706) 738-1142 Fax: (706) 733-6663 E-mail: spirit@metspirit.com Letters to the Editor: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, Ga. 30914-3809

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Opinion

3

2003 Gordon Highway Augusta

2 0 0 3

4 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

Whine Line A

$10 million tax-dollar work space for the Board of Education administration! You could build a high school and then some for that much! How many books and classroom improvements will be skipped so Larke can have a palace to work in? This is outrageous! Plus, it’s nowhere near the center of the county.

The goal is to teach children to read, write and do arithmetic, not to demonstrate to them how to get paid with taxpayer money!

Marion Williams should worry about real problems in Richmond County. The state average for welfare assistance is 1.6 percent of the population. It’s 5.4 percent in our county; 24 percent of the population is at or below the poverty level. That means unskilled workers with jobs are not making enough to take care of their families’ basic needs. That’s nearly one in every four. How are you, Mr. Rev. exfireman, railroad sometime worker, Commissioner Williams going to fix this?

After reading the open letter to Billy Morris from Charles Walker, I was perplexed. If what the senator says is true, why would the senator spend his money with a hotel that is owned by Billy Morris? Maybe the CSRA Classic gala and the next Walker wedding reception will be at BL’s.

I heard the best statement yet about Dubya’s war with Iraq. During an interview on one of the major 24-hour TV news shows, a retired U.S. Army general was asked for his reaction to the polls that show most Americans support a war with Iraq. He said, “What I’d like to know is the draft status of those who support a war in the event the draft has to be reinstated.” Boy! What a great, thoughtprovoking statement. Most of these people who support a war know they won’t have to go and neither will their children or grandchildren.

Augusta needs to be wary of Greeks bearing gifts. Billy Morris has been doggedly promoting his new sports entertainment complex, as part of a larger development plan, in The Augusta Chronicle. At a minimum, an independent evaluation of the plan prospects is needed before the public makes a $300-$400 million, 10-year tax dollar commitment. Presently the information we have is a study paid for by the two primary beneficiaries of the new arena, i.e., Billy Morris and Frank Lawrence. This large public commitment will squeeze out funding for critical needs, like the $100 million of unfunded drainage and flood prevention projects needed in Augusta. We need to put bread before circus.

I’m amazed at the whines I read each week. It’s so easy for people to write, call or email your whines, but my question is, “Do you do anything else but bitch?” I would love to know how many of these whining people actually get off their duffs and get active in politics or whatever cause they are whining about? My guess would be none! In a nutshell, stop whining about politics; do something to change what you don’t like; and quit using the Whine Line as a political forum!

Never once have I heard anyone advocating turning Broad Street into a red-light district. Making it an “entertainment zone” means that businesspeople can have the peace of mind that if they open a pub or restaurant, a so called “church” can’t set up shop next door and cause them to be denied a liquor license. Have any of these people been to River Street in Savannah? I would hardly call it seedy. It is a major tourist attraction and one of the most vibrant parts of Georgia’s most beautiful city, a model that Augusta should emulate.

When did “SUV” become a bad word?

No! I don’t own one.

Thumbs Up Whether you’re an Atlanta Falcons fan or not, you can’t help but give kudos to the Falcons’ stunning 27-7 win over the mighty Green Bay Packers. The Falcons not only managed to stomp the Super Bowl dreams of thousands of cheese heads, but they also crushed Green Bay’s

perfect home record in the playoffs. The Falcons’ win was Green Bay’s first defeat in 14 playoff games played at Lambeau Field. The Falcons have landed. Now let’s only hope that next Saturday’s game against the Philadelphia Eagles doesn’t send our birds home to roost.

Thumbs Down As if it weren’t enough that Roy Barnes lost his re-election bid for governor this year, 30 loud and obnoxious demonstrators had to stand outside a Marietta party for Barnes waving the old state flag with signs reading “Bye-Bye Barnes,” as reported by The Atlanta Journal-Constitution. Classy.

Doesn’t this group have enough to cele-

brate now that Sonny Perdue is in office?

The demonstrators didn’t make Roy Barnes look bad, they only managed to make themselves look like a bunch of spiteful rednecks who enjoy kicking the former governor when he’s down. They embarrassed themselves and they embarrassed Georgia in the process.

green or purple.

I’m a 50-plus year-old, middle-class Southern white male. I am sick of the statements that recent local election outcome was determined by race. The fact is that Ed McIntyre is a convicted criminal, convicted of taking bribes while in public office. I wouldn’t have voted for such a convicted criminal no matter what his race. Both Charles and Champ Walker have well-documented histories of unethical dealings. In deciding which candidate will get my vote, I look at qualifications and background and vote for the candidate that I feel will best represent all the people involved. I don’t care if the candidate is male or female, or white, black,

Just a whine about the person who doesn’t think Eli Lilly should be protected by lawsuits. It’s people like you that run up the cost of things by thinking you can sue for anything. They don’t have to produce a smallpox vaccine to keep people safe from attack. If the protection weren’t there, they wouldn’t produce it. There are no guarantees in life. Use a little common sense.

Hello dis-gustans. I am the cashier you irritate every day. You must follow my elaborate ordering procedure or get crappy service. (1) Decide what you want

Will someone tell me, please, who in the Augusta city government is responsible for having heavy tree limbs, broken from trees on city property, removed from the sidewalk? On Peachtree Street (located in West Augusta) there are two huge piles of limbs placed on the sidewalk – from the first storm of 2002. I called the mayor’s office to obtain the phone number of the department responsible for removing these hazards. The Mayor’s office gave me a number to call. I called the number and was given another number, then after being given six different numbers to call without success, I gave up. Perhaps by the end of 2003, the limbs will be so deteriorated the wind will sweep them away.

before you step in front of me. (2) Step up to the counter, money ready! (3) Order your damn food off the menu and don’t ask for things we don’t have. (4) Step to the side and let other customers order.

Pretty hard, huh?

But where are the clones? Quick, send in the clones. Don’t bother, they’re here.

I am a downtown business and property owner. We are currently working on our facade and are almost finished bringing it

back to original. It disheartens and discourages my employees and myself when we get offered drugs and hassled about buying stolen guns from tenants of the Richmond Summit on Broad Street. I am willing to pay and make this work. When is the city?

I think it’s terrible about Mackenzie Clark being fired from the “Y Wake Up Show” on Y105. Augusta, we need to come together and help her out.

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To the ignorant Republican who doesn’t have it together either: For your information, if we are not fighting a war for oil, why are we fighting Iraq? Iraq did not attack us at the World Trade Center.

There is no evidence that they have weapons of mass destruction, but they do have a lot of oil. How come we are not going after North Korea, who has admitted they have weapons of mass destruction? Do you want to know why?

Because they don’t have oil.

Isn’t it odd that American school children are not allowed (in some school districts) to wear T-shirts bearing the lettering “I Love Jesus” but Muslim children are continued on page 6

The redefined 2003 Volvo S40 comes equipped with standard safety features some other cars in its class don’t even offer as options. Things like full-length Inflatable Side Curtains and a Whiplash Protection Seating System.

The very same standard features that make a Volvo a Volvo. We can also safely say it’s more stylish than ever, with a redesigned exterior that’s more agreeable to the eye.

The redefined Volvo S40 certainly has a lot to offer. Including of course, safety features other imports have yet to even import. Visit your local Volvo retailer or volvocars.com.

*MSRP of the 2003 Volvo S40 as shown with optional equipment is $24,350. Price does not include destination charge, tax and title. See your authorized Volvo retailer for complete details. ©2002 Volvo Cars of North America, LLC. Volvo for life™ is a registered trademark of Volvo. Always wear your seat belt.

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Suburban Torture

M E T R O

BY

JULIE

allowed to go to school wearing head wraps and other mufti signifying their allegiance to Islam? What has happened to this country?

LARSON

S P I R I T

I’d like to try and answer the person who wanted to know how the local ambulance service in Augusta could answer 24,000 calls a year. If you continued your math a little further and knew that there are eight dedicated 911 ambulances in Augusta, that 66 calls a day is only eight calls per unit average. Some of the ambulances in Augusta, like the one in the city, can routinely answer 18 to 22 calls a day (24 hours). As for how you could get a bill for $700, the county subsidizes the service. It should be millions but it is not, so it can cover some of those $700 bills that don’t get paid. You are billed for mileage and supplies on top of the base rate for the ambulance. Like we have said before, nobody cares what the emergency services do or how until they need us, then we’d better be there fast and cheap.

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I think about the “cause” that Martha Burk is heading. If she succeeds, Augusta National will be forced to admit one, two, or maybe even three ridiculously rich women. This will enable these women to play golf and hang out in the clubhouse.

Ms. Burk needs to find a larger, more needy group to fight for.

My whine concerns last week’s Austin

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Austin, instead of spewing your rightwing crap, why don’t you do some responsible journalism and take on the entire political system? It’s terrible that our political system has been polluted with corporate and “special interest” groups on both sides of the aisle. Why don’t you fight for a better political system, a system that actually represents the people and not the party? You know

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Newt stepped on his own toes with his “Contract on America,” and the Republicans will do the same thing with the majority in the Senate and the Congress. Granted, the Democrats have their kooks, but the Republicans have just as many.

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Rhodes opinion column, titled “Liberals Are Getting Nuttier, and We Are Laughing Louder.” Normally I just ignore Austin’s little “redneck” tirades as typical right-wing gibberish, but I got to tell you, Austin, you outdid yourself this week.

First of all, you start off your article by quoting your demigod Rush Limbaugh.

By the way, that is not the best way to get credibility, Austin, trust me on that. You quoted Rush as saying that liberals go through evolutionary changes when they lose political clout: They go crazy. Yeah, crazy like a fox. They’ll be back and they will win big, because the liberals may go crazy when they lose political clout, but Republicans get full of themselves when they have political clout and they start to show their true colors, i.e., Trent Lott.

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Words “The Human Relations Commission has a blue ribbon committee that meets monthly at the Chamber of Commerce working on the problems that’s facing Augusta, some of the things the mayor pointed to today. And the committee plans to come up with a map outlining what it will take to bring the races together — blacks, whites, Hispanics, Orientals, every ethnic group.”

I’m just trying to figure out why anybody would want to be the mayor of a little ol’ bitty town like Augusta, Ga. We only have one little mall here and we used to have two, so that just tells you something about how small we are. Or maybe we should ask, why does Bob Young want to be mayor? He can’t even open Regency Mall back up.

I can’t believe that radio station let Mackenzie Clark go. That was so stupid.

That radio station is going to go down.

It’s ridiculous and the biggest mistake they have ever made. They are going to lose a lot of listeners.

If I had known that the “arrogant” Joey Brush was plotting his midlife crisis as soon as the election was over, I would have never voted for him. He’s such a phony!

Let me clear up some misconceptions: Pastor Harris hasn’t been at Curtis even five years, much less 15. And as for the church/state separation, please read what it says and get someone intelligent to explain it to you. It doesn’t have any bearing whatsoever on the stated situation. Curtis has been on Broad Street as an entity for over 200 years. Now they don’t have any say-so on what goes on, on this street? Who else has been down

there for 200 years? It’s also one of the largest employers on Broad Street. They have recently voted on whether or not to move the church somewhere else and even Julian Osbon was opposed to that.

He wants them there.

To the fitness center/gym I work out in: Turn on the air conditioning! When people are working out, it’s so damn hot in that place. Instead of trying to get new clients, why don’t you try keeping the one you have by getting the air going in that place?

A patriot must always be prepared to defend his country against his government.

I would like to comment on the crucial system in the schools. They are blaming so many of us teachers as to why these students cannot do well in school, when in fact what they are doing is hiring provisional teachers. Many are not serious about their jobs, and these provisional teachers are taking five years to get certified. How can you blame teachers for a child’s limited success in school? As long as you hire people who are not certified, who are really not interested in becoming certified, this is the quality you are going to get in the schools.

- Call our Whine Line at 510-2051 and leave your comments. We won’t use your name. Fax your whines by dialing (706) 733-6663 or e-mail your whines to whine@metspirit.com.

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

– Frank Thomas, the executive director of the Augusta Human Relations Commission, as quoted in The Augusta Chronicle following the mayor’s inaugural speech.

Orientals?

why, Austin? Because you’re nothing but small-time, and that’s all you ever will be. So just sit here in Augusta and take your cheap little political pot shots.

That’s all you can handle anyway.

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or more than a decade now, the P.U.-litzer Prizes have gone to some of America’s stinkiest media performances each year. The competition was fierce as ever in 2002. Many journalistic pieces of work deserved recognition. Only a few could be chosen.

While making the selections, I have relied heavily on research by the staff of the media watch group FAIR (where I’m an associate).

However, the responsibility for bestowing the latest P.U.-litzers is entirely mine.

Here are the 11th annual P.U.-litzer Prizes, for the foulest media achievements of 2002:

World News Tonight” gave them 30 minutes, and the total on “CBS Evening News” amounted to 10 minutes.

“Kicking Out History” Award — Multiple winners Dozens of esteemed journalists and major media outlets qualified for this prize by reporting that the Iraqi government had ejected U.N. weapons inspectors four years ago. Actually, the inspectors left Iraq in December 1998 under orders from UNSCOM head Richard Butler just before the blitz of U.S. bombing dubbed “Operation Desert Fox.” With notable disregard for historical facts, many reporters at leading news organizations flatly asserted that Saddam Hussein had “expelled” or “kicked out” the U.N. inspectors.

Among the purveyors of that misinformation were Daniel Schorr of National Public Radio (Aug. 3), John Diamond of USA Today (Aug. 8), John McWethy of “ABC World News Tonight” (Aug. 12), John King of CNN (Aug. 18), John L. Lumpkin of the Associated Press (Sept. 7), Randall Pinkston of “CBS Evening News” (Nov. 9), Betsy Pisik of The Washington Times (Nov. 14) and Bob Woodward of The Washington Post (Nov. 17).

Some outlets were repeat winners, as when USA Today claimed in a Sept. 4 editorial that “Saddam expelled U.N. weapons inspectors in 1998.” Other prominent newspapers also made the false information a centerpiece of the positions that they espoused. The New York Times declared in an Aug. 3 editorial: “America’s goal should be to ensure that Iraq is disarmed of all unconventional weapons. ... To thwart this goal, Baghdad expelled United Nations arms inspectors four years ago.” On the very next day, The Washington Post editorialized: “Since 1998, when U.N. inspectors were expelled, Iraq has almost certainly been working to build more chemical and biological weapons.”

Fabrication-of-Exoneration Award — Cokie Roberts Commenting on George W. Bush’s dubious role as a member of the board at Harken Energy, reporter-turned-pundit Cokie Roberts dismissed the idea that Bush might have been involved in corporate malfeasance during his corporate endeavors. “The president was exonerated by the Securities and Exchange Commission, saying he didn’t do anything illegal or improper on insider trading charges,” she said on July 8. “But the Democrats won’t let it go.” Roberts did not mention that Bush’s lawyers asked the Securities and Exchange Commission for a statement that he had been cleared — and the SEC responded that its initial letter “must in no way be construed as indicating that [Bush] has been exonerated or that no action may ultimately result from the staff’s investigation.”

Gold Standard Prize — NBC News Too savvy to go along with the theory that TV news producers are professionals who should edit stories without fear or favor, the decision-makers at “NBC Nightly News” devoted 69 minutes of coverage to the Winter Olympics, which aired in early 2002 on NBC. It just so happened that competing news shows on other networks saw much less news value in the games — “ABC

Media Darwinism Prize — Barry Diller As a longtime media tycoon now at the top of the Vivendi Universal conglomerate, Barry Diller isn’t shy about depicting his success as part of an upward evolutionary spiral. “Media is going to continue its trend of consolidation, which mirrors the ongoing globalization,” Diller told the Los Angeles Times in March. “This is a natural law. It is inevitable.”

Self-Slander Prize — Ann Coulter Coulter is a best-selling author who likes to attack the news media for supposed leftwing bias and irresponsibility. During an August interview with The New York Observer, she said: “My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not go to The New York Times Building.”

Self-Satisfaction Prize — CNN anchor Jack Cafferty On CNN’s “American Morning” program Aug. 5, Cafferty mixed candor with exemplary media arrogance: “This is a commercial enterprise. This is not PBS. We’re not here as a public service. We’re here to make money.

We sell advertising, and we do it on the premise that people are going to watch. If you don’t cover the miners because you want to do a story about a debt crisis in Brazil at the time everybody else is covering the miners, then Citibank calls up and says, ‘You know what? We’re not renewing the commercial contract.’ I mean, it’s a business.”

Norman Solomon’s new book, “Target Iraq: What the News Media Didn’t Tell You,” coauthored with foreign correspondent Reese Erlich, will be published in February by Context Books.

9

Opinion: Austin Rhodes

M E T R O

///// ZOOM ZOOM It’s Official: Cheeks Trumps Walker, 626

S P I R I T

CSRA Wins

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everal weeks back in this column I alluded to the loss of our local state senator, Charles Walker, as a state budget conferee. That one development signaled the loss of more “local clout” than any other in the election season.

Even those who heralded the demise of the ethically challenged Walker cringed at the power vacuum his exit foretold.

There are six legislative conferees who help develop the state budget. They, unlike any other legislators, become the co-archetects of Georgia’s spending plans. Walker’s presence on that team is what directly gave the CSRA things like funding for the Golf Hall of Fame, ANIC and other local projects too numerous to mention. Walker was also able to position himself and his friends at the edges of that funding, to line their pockets. That practice was legend.

Now, state Senator Don Cheeks has announced to the world that he has ascended to the same position, by virtue of his party switch, his seniority, and friendship with new Governor Sonny Perdue.

Funny, local news organizations led with the story of the new cancer center being funded, and gave short shrift to the conferee angle. Dummies. While the cancer center funding is important, it is hardly breaking news. We all knew it was coming, Cheeks, Perdue, and every other local elected official said it was a done deal.

It is like celebrating a touchdown, but taking little notice of a coaching change. Oh well, enough of the civics lesson. I just want to emphasize that even well-informed people, like those who read the paper every day, need to use their thinking caps in setting their minds and hearts on any political endeavor. Even those charged with delivering the local news can miss the forest for the trees. It happens in Augusta quite often.

It is now carved in stone, folks: Augusta, Ga., has not lost one ounce of power, leverage, or prestige with the political death of Charles Walker. In fact, given the change in the governor’s office, we have upgraded tremendously.

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NEW

2002 626 Don Cheeks Under a Republican Senate and governor, Democrat Charles Walker would have been little more than comic relief in the Gold Dome.

For local residents, it is a win-win all the way around. Cheeks brings all the firepower Walker could muster, with none of the bullying, glad-handing, and dismal ethics which were hallmarks of the Walker regime.

In the meantime, all the crybabies in the local Democratic leadership have really been shown a thing or two. There has been, and will be, no loss of local gravitas. In fact, given that Don Cheeks stands tall without investigators following him around, no one can even suggest that we are not all better off.

If Cheeks wants, he should be able to retire from his elected position after another 15 or 20 terms. No one is going to touch him.

— The views expressed in this column are the views of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher. The archived Austin Rhodes columns can now be seen at www.wgac.com.

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10

Opinion: Insider

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

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Zell Won’t Run

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s The Insider goes to press U.S. Senator Zell Miller (DGa.) has announced that he will not seek re-election in 2004.

Miller is making his plans known “so those who want to run can begin their preparation.” Miller knows that his announcement will open the floodgates in Georgia for potential candidates. Expect several names to surface between now and 2004.

It is no secret that U.S. Congressman Charlie Norwood (R-Ga.) has expressed an interest in running for the Senate if Miller declined to run again. Now Norwood will have to make a decision. A plethora of other candidates, both Democrat and Republican, will be interested. If a sitting politician like Norwood runs, a musical chairs-style chain reaction could be set in motion as various office-holders in the state leave their offices to run for seats opening up. For example, if Norwood and another sitting congressman or two choose to run for Miller’s U.S. Senate seat, it is likely that a state legislator or two will be enticed to seek congressional seats vacated by congressmen chasing the open Senate seat. This, in turn, will open up state offices that need to be filled. Let the speculation begin. More later.

Schrenko’s Dilemma Georgia School Board Superintendent Linda Schrenko will be jobless in a few days. Having chosen to run for governor instead of seeking her old post as superintendent, she finds herself out of office and out of a job. An interesting twist to her pending unemployment is that she is just a few days short of serving enough time in office to get state retirement benefits.

Schrenko has been pleading for a job around Atlanta, telling reporters and political contacts that she would consider no job too lowly for her if she could just work the twelve days she is short of retirement. As The Insider goes to press, nobody has stepped forward in her defense.

COLEMAN PLUMBING (706) 556-3833 24 HOUR SERVICE Linda Schrenko

Her campaign against Governor-Elect Sonny Perdue in the Republican primary angered Republicans throughout the state. The Republican power structure asked her not to run but she did anyway. Her tactics and behavior during the election further damaged her relationship with Perdue and other Republicans who could now help her find a way to meet the requirements of state retirement but likely won’t lift a finger on her behalf.

Has she burned too many bridges?

Will someone step forward to help her?

We’ll know in a very few days.

High Drama Under the Gold Dome On Monday, Jan. 13, Georgia lawmakers will sound the opening gavel of the 2003 legislative session. For the first time in decades former House Speaker Tom Murphy will be absent from the proceedings, having been bumped off in his re-election bid to the state House.

Murphy’s hand-picked choice to succeed him as speaker is state Rep. Terry Coleman, a staunch Murphy ally and partisan Democrat.

Following the November elections the smart money was choosing Coleman as a sure bet to become speaker in the Democrat-controlled House but the consistent effort on the part of Republican (GOP) lawmakers and GOP Governor Sonny Perdue has Coleman scrambling.

Capitol insiders report that Democrat state Rep. Larry Walker may edge out Coleman for the coveted job.

Coleman basically told Republicans (GOP) that they would not be participating in leadership/committee assignments under his watch. Facing another year of Democratic dominance, GOP leaders went to work. Finding Walker a receptive Democrat who wants to be speaker, they approached him and other Democrats to construct a coalition of Republicans and Democrats who want to work together now that Murphy no longer lords over the Gold Dome. The result is that, if Walker beats Coleman, Republicans will get certain committee assignments and participate in government in ways they would not be allowed under Coleman.

Republican insiders swear they have the votes to elect Walker but political observers aren’t counting out Coleman or the hard-core politics involved at the state Capitol. The stakes are high for Republicans. If Walker beats Coleman they may actually be able to forge ahead with some of their ideas, especially considering the state Senate and the governor’s mansion are led by Republicans.

If Coleman wins, Republicans, Walker and Democrats who supported Walker are in for a long session.

— The views expressed in this column are the views of The Insider and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

11

MetroBeat Rural/Metro and Gold Cross Come to Agreement

B

efore Rural/Metro and Gold Cross ambulance services went toe-to-toe, who even knew what a mutual aid agreement was? Well, now that we’ve had our education, the whole issue has become somewhat of a moot point. At the Jan. 7 commission meeting, Augusta City Administrator George Kolb delivered a report on an agreement that the two companies have finally reached.

But first a little history. The flap was about money. The two emergency medical service companies, one employed

by Richmond County, and the other employed by Columbia County, were arguing over who should foot the bill when one county provides backup ambulance service when the other county’s vehicles are all in use.

It doesn’t happen often, according to previously published statements by commissioners, and Rural/Metro division general manager Douglas Hooten.

But the fact that it can happen at all is enough to stick the situation with the big, scary name “Status Level Zero.”

Though Rural/Metro is negotiating with Aiken County’s EMS provider, it already has mutual aid agreements with Burke County EMA and Lincoln County EMS. In a real emergency, those areas are much too far away to provide Augusta with backup ambulance service in a safe amount of time.

The only other nearby ambulance service is Gold Cross, which is currently Columbia County’s primary emergency services provider. The two services had been providing mutual aid for each other, until Gold Cross CEO Tom Schneider requested payment from Richmond County for three calls his company had handled in Richmond County in one day. He requested that payment in September, and since then the two companies have gone back and forth about the issue.

Schneider is quoted as suggesting the two companies pay each other for services at a rate of $187 a call, and as saying Rural/Metro countered with a suggestion of their own: That they pay Gold Cross $25 per call and Gold Cross pay them $75 a call.

Gold Cross didn’t like that very much.

“We can’t begin this process before we go through the project definition phase.”

- County Commissioner Bill Kuhlke But the issue has since been resolved, and here is the plan: If Rural/Metro provides mutual aid to Gold Cross, then Gold Cross will pay Rural/Metro $200 per call; if Gold Gross provides mutual aid to Rural/Metro, then Rural/Metro will pay Gold Cross $200.

If the call is cancelled, the responding company will be paid $100 by the other company. No payment will be collected, however, in case of disaster.

Green Light Goes to Judicial Center Planning In a unanimous decision, the Augusta Commission decided to give the green

light to a work authorization for the new proposed judicial center, to be placed somewhere near the current Municipal Building.

Where exactly, they haven’t decided, and that, along with a few other sketchy details, gave a few of the commissioners some pause.

Andy Cheek, for instance, was worried about delays and unexpected cost.

“I don’t want to see the people of Augusta paying for this thing when it’s an oversight on the part of the contractor,” he said, harkening back to the days of the school board’s $115 million bond referendum for the purpose of building

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9

BY RHONDA JONES

new schools. The contractors’ fees came from bond money that was left over after building, Cheek said, providing the contractors with ample motivation for saving money. He thought that was a good way to control costs.

Willie Mays was concerned that the facility’s parking lot had not yet been planned.

County attorney Jim Wall – whom the commission has decided to keep on the payroll for another year, by the way – assured the commissioners that those things would be taken care of in due time.

“This contract does not envision the construction of parking,” Wall said, adding that they haven’t even decided where exactly they’re going to put the building, or even the features the building is to have.

Commissioner Bill Kuhlke said they simply were not yet at that phase of planning. “I can assure you they’re going to watch every penny that goes through,” he said of the advisory committee, which is made up of professionals such as architects and businesspeople.

“We can’t begin this process before we go through the project definition phase,” he said.

The project definition phase costs $361,280.

Convention Center Parking Lot Still Unmanned And there is still no one overseeing the parking at the Radisson and Convention Center Parking Facility.

The parking facility – ostensibly a paid parking facility – has been lying fallow since November, when the contract with McLaurin Parking expired.

Since then, no one has been managing the facility and the city has been missing out on the funding that could be collected from parking fees.

The commission was considering approving an agreement with Republic/Payne Parking System to operate the lot. That agreement would have put Republic/Payne to work from Jan. 15, 2003 until Jan. 31, 2004.

Instead, however, the commission unanimously decided to send the discussion back to committee.

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ANOTHER $6,000,000

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IS THE GOLF HALL OF FAME WORTH IT? B

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A

N

N

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ow Augusta’s muchtouted Georgia Golf Hall of Fame project is progressing depends on whom you ask.

A good indication might also be gleaned from those shying away from talking about it at all — most notably, local attorney Sam Nicholson, credited with starting the project nearly two decades ago.

As a state legislator, Nicholson authored legislation to form the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame and served as chairman of its board for nearly 20 years.

But when contacted recently about the project, Nicholson had little to say.

“I really don’t have any comment about it, other than to say that hopefully, eventually, one day the building will be built,” said Nicholson, who has stepped down as chairman but still serves on the board.

“I’m not in the day-to-day planning or development of the project so I can’t really comment on it. I’m just not involved in it to the point that I could comment accurately or intelligently about what’s going on with it.”

If so few words from the dreamer of the vision himself weren’t enough to make one ponder the proposed attraction’s fate, consider the numbers: The original 55,000-square-foot Georgia Golf Hall of Fame building, according to project organizers, has now shrunk to 6,000 square feet or less — roughly one-tenth its original size.

And even that size facility might not get built, organizers say, unless Augusta is willing to fork over $6 million from sales tax funds.

Augusta Commissioner Ulmer Bridges, at a recent meeting to discuss upcoming sales tax projects, seemed to already have his mind made up on the matter, suggesting commissioners balk at the request when it comes before them in the near future.

After all, Bridges said, he was serving on the commission roughly seven years ago when the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame got its first, and ostensibly last, $6 million share of the sales tax pie.

“They promised us the $6 million we were giving them would be all they’d ever need. If we would just put that on the sales tax, they wouldn’t come to us for money anymore,” Bridges said. “So I was expecting them to stick by their word, because we’ve got other things to do as well. And now here they are, coming again and asking for more money for the Golf Hall of Fame.

“That was supposed to be a tourist attraction. You know, make money, stand on its own. Obviously, at this point it’s not.”

Augusta Mayor Bob Young, on the other hand, thinks the project merits completion.

Though Young himself questions the actual value of the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame as a tourist draw (organizers first thought it would bring as many as 300,000 visitors to the city each year) he thinks it still needs to be built, even if it takes city dollars to make that happen.

“As much as I don’t think we ought to be in the business of building tourist attractions and subsidizing everybody’s good idea, this thing has just languished so long,” Young said. “The point is, we need to get it finished, we need to

complete it, and if we’ve got to bite our lip and do it, then it’s probably the prudent thing to do in the big picture.”

However, Young said that $6 million request will likely have to be negotiated, and if the commission did vote to give the project financial assistance, he wouldn’t want to see the project’s organizers back with open hands again.

“If we give them $6 million, they will raise $3 million in the private sector for an endowment for operation and maintenance for the project so that they will not have to come back to us for some operating subsidy, which I’ve made clear to them that we’re not going to give them,” Young said. “It needs to be self-supporting and certainly we don’t want to build something and see it close a year later because it doesn’t have any source of income to operate it.”

All told, the project on 17 acres behind serpentine brick walls on Reynolds Street has received roughly $12 million in state and local funding, including $1 million from the Augusta Neighborhood Improvement Corporation and $6 million from the city’s Special Purpose Local Option Sales Tax (SPLOST).

Private contributions have rounded out the roughly $15 million that has gone into the project thus far.

The result was the opening last year of the Augusta Golf & Gardens, a 9-acre botanical garden, replete with bronze statues of golf’s greats, that was to form an aesthetically pleasing backdrop and foundation for the golf hall building.

The Georgia Golf Hall of Fame and the Augusta Golf & Gardens, combined, were envisioned as a $30 million project.

Georgia Golf Hall of Fame officials kicked off a fundraising campaign around the spring of 1999 to bring the entire project to completion, but economic woes and the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11 have derailed much of that activity.

“It (the start of the campaign) was about the time that corporations were having earnings problems and the economy was going downhill,” said Warren Y. Jobe, former senior vice president of Georgia Power’s parent company, the Southern Company, who was tapped in 1999 to lead a fundraising campaign to complete the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame. “And you know, that really hasn’t changed. It’s a very difficult time to raise money right now. So we kind of put it in a holding pattern for that reason.”

Jobe, who lives in the Atlanta area and retired from Southern Company last year, said even potential marketing dollars from corporate sponsors dried up in the face of the bleak economy.

“We thought that corporations might be willing to spend marketing dollars there,” Jobe said. “But like I said before, the hard economic times kind of made us put the thing in a holding pattern for the time being.”

Jobe said he was tapped for the fundraising job by, among other people, William S. “Billy” Morris III, owner and publisher of The Augusta Chronicle, and Paul Simon, former president of Morris’ company, Morris Communications Corporation.

He said he has done little on the fundraising front for the project since

continued on page 14

“

13 M E T R O

They (the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame) promised us the $6 million we were giving them would be all they’d ever need. If we would just put that on the sales tax, they wouldn’t come to us for money anymore. So I was expecting them to stick by their word, because we’ve got other things to do as well.

”

— Augusta Commissioner Ulmer Bridges

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14 continued from page 13 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

retiring from Southern Company in the spring of 2001.

Despite all that seems currently stacked against the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame, however, Mark Darnell (pictured left) can see the light at the end of the tunnel, albeit from the vantage point of a portable trailer office.

A former golf pro at West Lake Country Club and an inductee into the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame, himself, Darnell now serves as interim executive director of the project and will have the task of convincing Augusta commissioners that the project is worthy of another $6 million allotment of SPLOST money.

Darnell, who has served on the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame board of directors for 12 years, expressed disappointment with the downsizing of the project, but still sees it as a worthwhile cause.

“Really, it’s just kind of a sign of the times,” Darnell said. “We realized that the original concept was just a mammoth project. And what’s happened since Sept.

11, everybody’s had to suck it up some.”

Darnell, who served as West Lake’s golf pro for more than 30 years before being abruptly terminated with little explanation, at least in the media, says he can account for roughly 50,000 visitors to the Augusta Golf & Gardens in the past year.

A good deal of those visitors have come in the form of weddings and other special events held in the gardens, Darnell said.

Some also visit the gardens as a part of bus tours, or as special promotions, such as an occasionally offered deal that lets schoolchildren and other visitors see both the gardens and the Fort Discovery National Science Center, at the other end of Riverwalk, for a special price.

Darnell acknowledges, however, that local support has not been a strength for the attraction.

“If we’ve stubbed our toe anyplace,” Darnell said, “it’s been not getting the local people to come out here.”

Bridges, the Augusta commissioner, said he hasn’t seen evidence of much activity at the attraction at all.

“I think we got some initial (attendance) reports since it first opened, but I can’t remember getting any other reports since then,” Bridges said. “When I go by there, I just don’t see the activity. I know there’s some events, weddings and that kind of thing, but I just don’t see the activity you would expect, or we were kind of led to believe would be there. Although a lot of us never believed it. I’d have to say that.”

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Bridges added that the city has nearly $90 million worth of infrastructure and drainage problems that need attention, and he doesn’t think this is the time to consider giving money to the attraction.

But Darnell said he is certain if the money is obtained to construct the facility, the payback to the community will be worth it. He also said he regretted being in the position to have to ask for money from the city and doesn’t anticipate having to do it again.

“It’s not going to go over $6 million, because we’ll just draw the line and say $6 million’s it,” Darnell said.

What some may not realize is that the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame has existed as an entity, without a building, since it was formed by Nicholson’s legislation roughly 20 years ago.

As of Jan. 11, a total of 62 golfers will have been inducted into the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame. Local inductees include Darnell; 1987 Masters winner Larry Mize; and Jim Dent, who won the 1989 MONY Syracuse Senior Classic and set a new record during the 1992 Senior Tour for the most money won in a single season without a victory.

Darnell said two different options are being considered for the hall of fame building.

“There’s two schools of thought,” Darnell said. “One is to have like a Southern antebellum type thing. Another trend might have a look similar to the R & A Clubhouse in Scotland. So that would kind of tie in the golf motif as part of the gardens.”

Darnell said he envisions there being “kiosks” in the facility that would allow visitors to select canned video footage of Masters tournaments from certain years.

“They would probably have something like, with the Augusta National, maybe some of the different Masters tournaments over the years, that if somebody wanted to punch up the 1965 Masters they would hit that and it would show, not the entire Masters film, but a portion of the Masters film,” Darnell said.

There would also be conference rooms and perhaps some interactive educational components for children, Darnell said.

As Darnell describes it, the newly proposed building seems but a shadow of the originally planned 55,000-foot complex, which called for, among other things, multiple conference rooms, a restaurant and an IMAX theater.

Asked if it would be better to wait to go forward with the project, in hopes the economy will improve, Darnell said,

“

It’s (additional city funding) not going to go over $6 million, because we’ll just draw the line and say $6 million’s it.

“Once you start waiting and stopping, then you lose all the momentum, because the gardens are still new and there’s a lot of people in Augusta who’ve not been here yet. So we’d rather go ahead and get the building up and get it running so we have a completed project and then really get into the marketing business and get everybody to show up.”

The project’s marketing director, Dianne King, said Augusta Golf & Gardens will be featured in the 2003 PGA tour handbook, which will equate with a windfall in terms of promoting the attraction.

“That’s great for Augusta,” King said.

“That means every golf visitor to every tournament they go to will have information on Augusta right there.”

But Young, for one, thinks only the future can tell how much of an economic benefit to Augusta the completed project will be.

“I think as a standalone facility, it’s not going to be a mecca that people will come to see from all over the world. It’s not that,” Young said. “But in terms of an

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overall experience in Augusta, as a place to visit in addition to visiting other places, from that standpoint, it makes sense.

“I just don’t think it’s something that people will come here and spend a weekend just to go to the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame. But I think they will come here and include a visit to the Golf Hall of Fame while they’re doing other things.”

Although Darnell has now served on the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame board for 12 years, he acknowledges his inexperience in the machinations of local government.

With that in mind, Darnell expressed uncertainty in his chances of being able to sell commissioners on the idea of providing the much-needed funds to complete the project.

“I don’t know. I’ve never been involved in this political arena before,” Darnell said. “I know a lot of things are pretty much split. Different groups get different things and there’s different interests and that type stuff.

“So, I don’t know.”

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16 M E T R O

The Weird Wild Web

S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

By Rhonda Jones

I

t has come to our attention that some of you are using the Internet as entertainment. While that is highly unadvisable, and even dangerous, if you are going to plant yourselves in front of a computer screen and go randomly to strange destinations perpetrated upon the public by some of the world’s sickest minds, you may as well go to the weirdest of the weird.

So, as a service to our devoted readership, we here at The Spirit have compiled a list of Internet destinations for your perusal. All sites contained herein have been tested by our highly sophisticated panel of Web users. After all, we wouldn’t want you to go anywhere we wouldn’t go. And believe me, that doesn’t leave much.

Warning: There are wordy durds on these sites and a host of potentially nightmare-inducing, politically incorrect subject matter. Don’t go there if this kind of thing upsets you. And if you do, don’t come running to me when you’ve hurt yourself.

Just to keep you from being disap-

pointed, we have steered clear of sexually explicit sites. While some of the sites we have chosen may indeed contain such material, we have avoided choosing sites specifically for such content. That’s just boring. Besides, we guessed you probably already knew where those were anyway.

On with the show. fear.com Just kidding. http://thesmokinggun.com This is a collection of quirky documents, such as ... more celebrity mugshots! Yay! The Hugh Grant is hilarious. He looks like someone hung him on a hook by his jacket. Kid Rock is in here, as are a much younger, blonder Ozzy, and Frank Sinatra. And guess who? Marilyn Manson again. Also, surprise surprise, Paul Reubens of Pee Wee Herman fame turned himself in Nov. 15 after being charged with misdemeanor possession of kiddie porn. I’m sure you’ve heard all the “Pee Wee’s Playhouse” jokes by now.

There are even before-and-after shots — the 1991 indecent exposure mugshots in

which Reubens looks sort of wifebeaterish, and those recent ones, in which he bears a striking and disturbing resemblance to Hannibal Lecter. http://uglypeople.com/ If you have any human decency at all, you will feel extremely guilty about enjoying this one, but enjoy it you will.

There is also a celebrity section. It doesn’t say they have been compiled in the order of ugliest, but the first two are deceased male soprano Tiny Tim, and Howard Stern as “Fartman.” Sincerest apologies to everyone who has ever been close to these two men. And do go to the “Our Mail” section. In fact, in your trips through the disturbing realms of the Web, you should make a habit of checking out the hate mail. It is frequently hilarious.

We had a little trouble getting some of the sections to work properly, but that could just be because we’re all monkeys. http://anomalies-unlimited.com/ This is not a site that relies on its shocking content to provide hours of guilt-ridden entertainment. Some real

thought obviously went into this one, and one of my favorite things about it is the link description “Michael Jackson’s Poor Damn Face.” Slip down the rabbit hole to “A Photographic History of Michael Jackson’s Face With Blithering, Yet Witty Commentary.” It will take you from prenose job Michael to baby-dangling Michael. Further visual aids include the famous faces he most closely resembles at each point. Tim Curry as Dr. Frank N Furter in 1985, for instance. And it only gets worse. http://maddox.xmission.com/ The author bills it as “The Best Page in the Universe.” It’s simply a collection of rants on subjects ranging from Harry Potter (“Harry Potter’s Worst Foe: Puberty”), to discipline versus child abuse (“Love Your Kids? Prove It by Beating Them”).

Maddox wields sarcasm like a light saber.

Or something like that. There’s even a section on children’s art. Do not send your child’s art to this guy, unless you want his honest opinion, no holds barred. Anyway, the site’s funny as hell if you’re not one of those people waiting around for a reason

http://www.stopclownpornnow.org/ I agree. If there is such a thing as clown porn, it should most definitely be curtailed as soon as possible. However, this little site seems to be written tonguein-cheek. It’s good for a chuckle or two.

Just don’t stare too long at the harlequindiamond wallpaper. You may go blind, develop a migraine or have a seizure. But hey, you may be into that sort of thing. http://www.kernradio.com/ In itself, this site isn’t too strange. But if you move down the page to the link titled “Play the Wacko Jacko Game,” you will soon find yourself playing a twisted little game involving Michael Jackson and falling babies. ‘Nuff said. http://somethingawful.com/cliff/ihateyou There is something you should not spend another day on this planet without knowing: Cliff Yablonski hates you. This guy has for a very long time kept up a journal detailing all the people he hates and his various reasons for feeling this

http://www.celebritymorgue.com/ I really and truly wasn’t going to include this one. There are one or two people in here I don’t want rattling chains in my attic. Tiny Tim for instance, especially after I make the observation that this is probably the best photo ever to be taken of him. You can see a variety of celebrities, both from the entertainment industry and from the political realm. Even Jumbo the Elephant is pictured. And Elvis. And Marilyn Monroe. http://www.jesusoftheweek.com/ This site spotlights representations of Jesus, presumably sent in by people out in Internetland.

There are statues, paintings, ornaments – even sand sculptures.

You get the picture. It is not, however, without commentary.

Again, this site, like most of these sites, is only for the easily amused. Which brings us to huggyjesus.com.

http://www.ent.iastate.edu/Misc/ InsectsAsFood.html Those crazy kids at Iowa State have gone and made a table of fat and nutritional content of some of the more popular insects scuttling over the surface of Planet Earth, such as red ants and grasshoppers.

They’ve even included a few recipes so that you can take what you’ve learned right into real-world application. Want to bring something new and unique to your next office party? How about a crackers and cheese dip with candied crickets? Or maybe chocolate-covered grasshoppers for those in your crowd with a sweet tooth. There are links to cook books and to a Web site featuring info on creepy crawlies as a global food source.

http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/All ey/7028/farce.htm This is Doug Anderson’s Web Parody, and features “Whooee, It’s the White House,” “Mister Rogers Neighborhood Watch,” “The Star Wars Site Gag” and “HastaLaVista Search Engine.” Actually, “Mister Rogers Neighborhood Watch” is no longer there. In its place is an explanation why.

Disclaimer, Pleas for Mercy, etc.

One final note to any celebrities, alive, dead or undead, who may be mentioned in this article, specifically Marilyn Manson and other scary types: Don’t hurt me. It’s all in good fun, and anyway, that’s what you get for being such an ... interesting person.

If this little index of insanity brings to mind any of your favorite bizarreness, feel free to send us the links. Not that we’re going to write a story about it.

We’re just a bunch of freaks who like to torture ourselves.

http://www.stupid.com I don’t know what to make of this one.

It’s so brightly colored and friendlylooking. Reminds me of looking at catalogues when I was a kid. Everything seems so enticing. If you go to the candy section you’ll find Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans, which is some of the stuff that Harry Potter and Ron Dursley gnawed on during their first trip to

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r have a seiz

http://clownz.com/ Clown jokes, clown art, confessions of clownophobes.

http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com If you can’t understand simple tongue-incheek sarcasm, don’t go here. You won’t get it. And if you go there anyway, you’ll be ticked off. This is a social-commentary site illustrating how ludicrous it is for people to say and do the things that “Sally” and “Johnny” Whitebread are saying and doing on this site. If you don’t get that, go home. If you do get that, you may want to go to the “Your Letters” section to laugh at the people who don’t.

http://www.fart.com/ I know for a fact, based on the (euphemism alert!) “stuff” I get through the mail, that some of you will find this funny. There is a section of soundwav files that should crack up you and your friends real good.

Hogwart’s. These are at least partially real, as I’ve seen them in stores, but I seriously doubt that “ear wax” was a featured flavor. Hope not, anyway.

de vel op

http://disturbingauctions.com/ People have some crazy stuff in their houses. One item up for grabs is a ram’s head snuff mull. (The page author doesn’t know what that is, and neither do I.) It is made of an actual ram’s head and, even stranger, has wheels. It would be fun to torture the cat with. Other people are offering up a dead (baby) alligator in a dress, a drunken man figurine with three sets of eyes, a monkey hatching from an egg, a jock strap, a handbag made from a bull’s scrotum and a bag of ghost poop.

Emotionally Scarring Toys, Terrifying Dolls, a beer can doll and a deer butt are some of the truly atrocious treasures that people are actually putting out there. My personal favorite is a terrifying clown’s head lava lamp that just shouldn’t be.

Which brings us to our next couple of Web sites.

http://www.ilovebacon.com You know those billboards that make you turn your head and say, “I did not just see that,” and then make an illegal U-turn and drive back to make sure you didn’t see it – only to find out that you really did?

Well, this site is like that. It contains billboards that probably got some ad exec canned. Some will leave you scratching your head while others will cause you to bust a gut.

http://www.huggyjesus.com/ This is the most disturbing site I have ever seen.

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http://artbomb.net This site is, as its name suggests, da bomb. Yes I know I’m too old and too uncool to be saying da bomb. Bite me.

Anyway, the site itself isn’t particularly strange, but some of the stories it’s selling are. Artbomb is a peddler of graphic novels. The end.

way. And if you’re not on this site, don’t take it personally. He just hasn’t gotten around to hating you yet. If you can’t get there by typing in this entire URL, go to somethingawful.com and search for Cliff Yablonski in the left-hand column under “Hosted.”

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18 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

Arts

& Entertainment

Sandra Wolf-Meei Cameron: They Call Her a Prodigy

W

hat criticism the press has for young violinist Sandra Wolf-Meei Cameron seems to demand that she grow up.

In the Nov. 20, 2002, issue of the Palm Beach Daily News, music reviewer Abram Kreeger laments her youthful enthusiasm and longs for the day when Cameron gives a “mature performance.” Of her rendition of the Mozart “Violin Sonata in BFlat Major, K.378,” he says, “There was little need for the dazzling approach the young violinist delivered, especially considering the elegant and sophisticated nature of the work.”

Judging by this and other reviews, Cameron attacks these classical works with the ebullience of ... well, a youngster.

Other writers seem to enjoy her exuberance. Take, for instance, Alan Bostick’s January 2001 piece in the Nashville paper, The Tennessean. The article is titled “14year-old violinist’s performance with symphony proves to be riveting,” and states that Cameron’s energetic playing made up for the lack of subtlety that reveals her years.

Yet the articles also mention something that may account for some of her stumbles. She takes on challenging pieces. She debuted with Mendelssohn’s “Violin Concerto in E Minor, op. 64,” a piece which opens with the violin, rather than with the orchestra. So she got off to a hesitant start. Nevertheless, the report appearing in the July 31, 1999, edition of the Portland Press Herald states that the audience was “awed,” and that Cameron was “a wonder to behold.” That same reviewer, freelance writer V. R. Cann, was less kind to the flutist who played that concert, whose performance was “a little disappointing.”

The article goes on to suggest that further proof of Cameron’s value as a musician lay in the instrument on which she played – a 1690 Giovanni Baptista Rogerta violin, on loan from Reuning & Son Violins.

Not just anyone can go and borrow a 300-year-old instrument, you know.

Cameron is 16, but the concert reviewed

by Cann was Cameron’s debut, three and a half years ago, at the 1999 Bowdoin Music Festival in Portland, Maine.

Not Just a Violinist Speaking on the telephone with Cameron makes it clear that, in spite of the world’s temptation to divest prodigies of their childish fancy, this young violinist has a firm hold on hers.

Take her middle name, for instance. She added the “Wolf” herself, simply because she likes the animal. “It’s actually because of my obsession with wolves. It’s not permanent yet, but I’ve been using it. I think I will be using it,” she said, on a more permanent basis, making it an official part of her name.

When asked about what she likes to do when she’s not playing her violin, she had something surprising to say: Not only does she enjoy writing poetry and reading the works of masters such as Emily Dickinson, Walt Whitman and Robert Frost, as well as roller blading, playing tennis and skiing, she is engaged in the mission of teaching herself to speak backward.

“I wonder when I’ll actually become fluent and if I’ll have anyone to talk to,” she said.

But perhaps the most obvious link she has with childhood is the little rag doll who appears in many of her publicity photos, her companion, Helper. He’s become her musical mascot.

“He’s a little musical friend,” she said. “I used to carry him out on stage for my performances. He actually started out with me with the violin,” she said. “When I got the violin, my mom got him also for me and I kind of connected the two. He’s always there when I practice. He still comes to my concerts, but he likes to play hide and go seek,” she teased, “so if you want to find him, you’ll have to look for him in the hall.”

When asked the inevitable question concerning how she began with the violin, she said her mother told Cameron one day she was bringing home a special toy for her.

Asked if she were disappointed upon being presented with a violin, she said, not at all.

“I thought it was really neat,” she said, admitting that, to her, it was sort of a toy.

She was 8 at the time, and living in Germany with her family. When she returned to the United States, she enrolled in the Juilliard School’s Pre-College Division to study under violinist Lewis Kaplan. In Nov. 1998, she played with the State Orchestra in Eindhoven, The

BY RHONDA JONES

Netherlands. In August, 2000, she became the youngest winner of the Salzburg Mozarteum’s outstanding student prize and received many kudos at the Salzburg Festival.

She said that her parents are not musicians, but that her love for the violin grew out of being allowed to fall asleep to classical music when she was small, and she developed a love for it.

It is often beyond the abilities of mature musicians to answer questions concerning favorite musical pieces or favorite composers, perhaps because they have encountered so many “favorites” during their careers. But Cameron was ready with an answer. “I love all composers, but my favorite is Mozart. And also Prokofiev.”

See? It’s starting already.

When asked if she plans to be a professional musician, she said that most definitely she would.

“I would like to be a soloist, but I really

enjoy chamber music a lot and at Juilliard, we’re ... All instrumentalists are required to be in the orchestra. But I think my main goal would be to be a soloist.

“Maybe, hopefully, a composer and conductor sometime later.”

In addition to her high school studies, Cameron is taking a class in musical composition at the Juilliard School in New York.

“I’m really enjoying it,” she said.

In the future, she would love to take her violin around the world, see more of Europe, and play in Australia – but there is one spot on Earth that tugs at her heart as well as at her ambition. “My grandparents are living in Korea,” she said. “It would be really nice if I could get a chance to play there.”

“Actually,” she added, “I’m looking forward to this concert in Augusta, because that’ll be the first time I’m playing my own cadenza for the Mozart concerto.”

MUSIC

Attend the Concerts You too can experience Sandra Wolf-Meei Cameron – and possibly her sidekick Helper – in person next weekend. Pick your day.

On Saturday, Jan. 18, at 8 p.m., Augusta Symphony will present the young violinist in concert at the Maxwell Performing Arts Theatre on the campus of Augusta State University. The concert will feature Beethoven’s “Symphony No. 2 in D Major,” Cimarosa’s Overture to “Il Matrimonio Segreto,” and Mendelssohn’s “Violin Concerto in E Minor.” There will be a pre-

view lecture featuring Symphony concertmaster Ryan Kho, free of charge, at 7 p.m.

Tickets run $35, $28 and $15 general admission, with student prices running from $7.50 to $14.

On Jan. 19, there is yet another event.

Augusta Symphony will present its first Publix Family Series concert of 2003 at 3 p.m. at the Maxwell Performing Arts Theatre at Augusta State University. There will be a movement from a Mozart violin concerto, Strauss’ “Radetsky March” and “The Greentail Mouse.” The latter piece is intended for narrator with orchestra and will feature William Hobbins. Charles Courtney will perform the first two movements of Handel’s “Concerto No. 3 for Oboe” with the Symphony and Suzuki Strings. This concert also features Sandra Wolf-Meei Cameron, and includes the Augusta Symphony Orchestra, Symphony Youth Competition winner Charles Courtney and the Suzuki Strings.

At 2:15, students from Davidson Fine Arts School will perform with The Davidson Orchestra for the crowd.

Children can enjoy the musical petting zoo, which means they get to actually touch and try out various musical instruments.

All that activity may just put Cameron’s energy to the test!

For info or tickets, contact the Symphony office at (706) 826-4705, fax (706) 8264735 or visit the Symphony Web site at www.augustasymphony.org.

And Now for Something Completely Different B Y R H O N D A J O N E S

A

t noon on Jan. 21, 2003, there will be no singing or piano playing at the Tuesday’s Music Live show at St. Paul’s Church in downtown Augusta.

Joseph Gramley is coming to town. He is a multipercussionist, which means that he is a one-man percussion band.

“It’s a very strange thing, but this is what he does,” said Keith Shafer, organizer of the Tuesday’s Music Live event.

Gramley has played all over the world, and even made his solo debut in 1992 at Carnegie Hall, in the Weill Recital Hall.

He was a brand new University of Michigan graduate. Three years later, he left New York’s Juilliard School with a Master’s degree in hand, and spent four years with the Ethos Percussion Group.

And he has not stopped since. Credits include working as a percussionist for Yo-Yo Ma’s “Silk Road Project,” which has taken him to many of the wonderful places of the world: Paris, Amsterdam, Brussels, New York.

But Gramley’s made forays into pop culture as well, with a solo appearance in 1999 on the MTV Video Music Awards.

He co-wrote and performed J.Lo’s “If You Had My Love,” which became a No. 1 hit. He’s even collaborated with the Queen of Soul (Aretha Franklin).

His current work with Yo-Yo Ma is taking him throughout Italy, the United

States and Canada. If you’d like to know more, visit http://www.josephgramley.com. If you’d like to see what he can do, check him out at St. Paul’s Church at 6th and Reynolds on Jan. 21 at noon.

Tuesday’s Music Live is a catered event, so plan ahead if you’d like lunch.

Reservations for lunch are $7 per person and must be made in advance by calling the Tuesday’s Music Live Box Office at (706) 722-3463. For the concert itself, however, admission is free.

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Of course, she had to explain what that was. “It’s a section where the soloist gets to play by himself, or herself. It’s something where the soloist can show his or her talents.”

And show off a bit?

“In a way, I guess, but I don’t really think of it that way,” she said.

We asked whether her friends came to her concerts. “I haven’t really had any concerts here in Maryland, so they haven’t gotten a chance to see. But my friends at Juilliard sometimes, if I have a recital there, they can come, since it’s right at the school. And I have some coming up.”

It was important to Cameron that she thank her parents and teachers, “and especially (Augusta Symphony’s) Maestro (Donald) Portnoy for all the support and encouragement. And for inviting me, of course.”

Let’s hope that, when she does learn to embrace the subtleties of the music, she doesn’t lose her playful love for it.

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20 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

8

Days A Week

Arts

Auditions AUDITIONS AND FIRST MEETINGS FOR THE FOLLOWING ENSEMBLES at Augusta State University: Greater Augusta Youth Orchestras, 5-7 p.m. Jan. 13; Youth Wind Symphony, 7:15 p.m. Jan. 13; Augusta Flute Orchestra, 10 a.m. Jan. 18; High School Conservatory Jazz Band, 10:30 a.m. Jan. 18; Jazz Workshop for middle school students 1 p.m. Jan. 18.

Call 731-7971 for more information.

students can choose any class time: Mondays, 9 a.m. to noon or 6-9 p.m.; Tuesdays, 6-9 p.m.; or Wednesdays, 9 a.m. to noon. $30 per month. Call (803) 642-7631 for info.

USC-AIKEN MUSIC CONSERVATORY PROGR AM now open. Students of all ages and experience levels welcome. Private lessons available for musical instruments and voice; instructors are USC-Aiken faculty and have at least a master’s degree in their per formance area. (803) 641-3288.

Exhibitions

“ANNIE” AUDITIONS Jan. 9-10, 7 p.m., for adults.

Bring a prepared solo from the show; accompanist provided. Held at St. John United Methodist Church.

Call the Augusta Players at 826-4707 or visit www.augustaplayers.com for information.

“RECENT ACQUISITIONS: 2002” features works by John Baeder, Herb Jackson, Philip Morsberger, Tom Nakashima, Margaret Ramsey, Lorenso Scot t, Juanita Rogers, Purvis Young, Eleanor Hancock Pryor and Gilber t Gaul. The exhibit will be on display at the Morris Museum of Ar t Jan. 11-Feb. 23. Call 724-7501 for more information.

AUGUSTA CONCERT BAND rehearses Monday evenings and is looking to fill vacancies on most band instruments. Interested par ties should contact Ben Easter, (803) 202-0091 or e-mail bandforaugusta@aol.com.

“THE DOGGY IN THE WINDOW” animal photography exhibition by Ginny Southwor th will be at the Aiken County Historical Museum now through Feb. 23.

There is no admission charge. Call (803) 642-2015.

SWEET ADELINES PEACH STATE CHORUS OPEN REHEARSAL for singers each Thursday at 7 p.m. Held at 600 Mar tintown Road in Nor th Augusta. Contact Mildred Blain at 736-7740 or Mary Norman at (803) 279-6499.

Education

ART CLASSES AND WORKSHOPS are of fered yearround at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t. Classes and workshops are open to toddlers through adults and feature instruction in drawing, painting, photography, pot tery, weaving and sculpture. For a newslet ter or detailed information on registering for classes at the Ger trude Herber t, call 722-5495. The Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t also of fers educational tours; for information, contact the Education Director at the above telephone number.

AUGUSTA THEATRE COMPANY WINTER ACTING CLASSES BEGIN the week of Jan. 20. Classes available are Voice/Movement, Intro to Acting and Acting I, and sessions are open to children, teens and adults. Call 481-9040 for details.

THE AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONSERVATORY PROGR AM announces four music classes to star t in January: voice class meets Jan. 16, 7 p.m.; guitar class for beginners meets Jan. 13, 7 p.m.; piano class for beginners meets Jan. 11, 10 a.m.; music fundamentals and music reading skills meets Jan. 28, 7 p.m. Call 731-7971 for more information.

ART CLASSES FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS at the Ar t Factory. Classes in visual ar ts, dance and drama are of fered. The Ar t Factory also has a homeschool program and scholarships are available. 731-0008.

CER AMICS CLASSES at the Weeks Center Ceramics House in Aiken. Fees include one class per week and

MARTHA SIMKINS SPECIAL EXHIBITION at the Morris Museum of Ar t Jan. 16-April 20. “Mar tha Simkins Rediscovered” lecture and members’ reception Jan. 16 at 6 p.m. Cost for lecture is $3 for adults and $2 for seniors/students/military; cost for reception is $10 nonmembers; both events are free for members. Ar t at Lunch features “Marks of the Impressionists” discussion, a walking tour and boxed lunch at noon on Jan. 17. Reservations are required. “Mar tha Simkins Rediscovered” exhibit tour Jan. 19 at 2 p.m. is free.

Call the museum at 724-7501 for more information.

AT THE MARY PAULINE GALLERY: Philip Morsberger and Dederick Ward exhibit Jan. 10-Feb. 22. The opening reception will be held at the gallery Jan. 10, 5-8 p.m. Call the Mary Pauline Gallery for details at 7249542.

“COLLAGE WORKS: MELINDA MOORE LAMPKIN AND LUCY WEIGLE” features pieces by two local ar tists. The exhibit will be on display at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t Jan. 17-March 14, with a gallery talk and reception Jan. 17, 6-8 p.m. Gallery talk and reception is open to the public and is free for Ger trude Herber t members and $5 for non-members.

Call 722-5495 for more information.

BRUCE NELLSMITH exhibits his paintings at the Etherredge Center Lower Gallery through Feb. 1. Call (803) 641-3305.

CIVIL WAR ARTIFACTS of the First Independent Brigade will be on display at the Euchee Creek Branch Library in January. Call 556-0594.

MASK AND FABRIC EXHIBITION through Jan. 20 at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History.

African masks and mud cloth fabrics from the collection of Roger Kablan will be on display. Call 724-3576 for more information.

The 2003 East Coast Silver Gloves Boxing Championships will be held Jan. 10-11 at May Park Gym. For information, call the Augusta Boxing Club at 733-7533.

THE ARTWORK OF NANCY BANNISTER is on display at the Raging Bull, 828 Broad St., through the end of February. Bannister specializes in landscape and abstract ar t, as well as interior/ex terior murals. Call 722-0444 for more information.

PHOTOGR APHY BY GINNY SOUTHWORTH will be on display through Jan. 13 at the Aiken Thoroughbred Racing Hall of Fame and Museum. For information, call (803) 642-7650.

DANIEL HAYES will exhibit his ar twork at the Gibbs Library in January. For information, call 863-1946.

AT THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART: “Ware’s Folly: An Architectural Perspective” is in the First-Floor Gallery at Ware’s Folly through Feb. 21; “Creative Expression” is in the Ware’s Folly First Floor Gallery through Feb. 21; “Ar tist-in-Residence: CraigHoughton Elementary School Students Create” on display through Feb. 14. Call 722-5495 for more information.

Dance

AILEY II dance ensemble from New York City performs Jan. 20 at the Imperial Theatre, cour tesy of the Augusta Ballet. For more information, contact the Augusta Ballet Box Of fice at 261-0555 or visit www.augustaballet.org.

BALLROOM DANCE CLASSES Jan. 14-Feb. 17 or March 11-April 22 at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken.

Cost is $40 per couple and registration is accepted in pairs only. Call (803) 642-7631 for registration information.

SQUARE DANCE CLASSES AND OPEN HOUSE: Beginning classes run Jan. 27-March 31 and interme-

diate classes run April 14-June 16, but the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken holds an open house Jan. 13, 7:30 p.m., for all interested par ticipants. Call (803) 6427631 for more information.

CSR A/AUGUSTA BOGEY-WOOGIE DANCE AND SOCIAL GROUP holds a monthly dance every third Saturday of the month, star ting at 7:30 p.m. There are also meetings every Sunday at 4 p.m. at the Salsa Ruedo Casino and every Wednesday at 7:45 p.m. Men are especially encouraged to at tend. For information, phone 650-2396 or 736-3878.

SINGLES DANCE each Saturday night from 8-11 p.m. sponsored by the Christian Social Organization for Single Adults. Held at Westside High School. Tickets $5 for members, $7 for non-members, and are available at the door. For more information, contact Doris Heath, 736-3376.

Music USC-AIKEN FACULTY ARTIST RECITAL featuring Katherine Brooks and Richard Maltz, percussion; Katie Taylor, harp; and James Bennet t, piano. Held Jan. 23, 7 p.m. at USC-Aiken’s Etherredge Center. Call the box of fice at (803) 641-3305 for more information.

“MENDELSSOHN AND BEETHOVEN” MASTERWORKS CONCERT to be per formed by violinist Sandra WolfMeei Cameron Jan. 18, 8 p.m. at ASU’s Per forming Ar ts Theatre. Concer t preview at 7 p.m. Tickets are $35, $28 and $15; student rates are $14 and $7.50.

Cameron also per forms at the “Two Vir tuosos” Family Concer t Jan. 19, 3 p.m. at ASU’s Per forming Ar ts Theatre. Tickets are $6 or free for Paine College and ASU students. Call the Augusta Symphony at 8264705 for tickets.

“SIDE BY SIDE BY SONDHEIM” will be per formed by the Augusta Opera Jan. 23 and 25 at 7:30 p.m. with a matinee per formance Jan. 26 at 3 p.m. Held at the Imperial Theatre. Tickets are $12-$40, with group, student and senior discounts available. Call the Augusta Opera at 826-4710 for information.

THE GRYPHON TRIO per forms 8 p.m. Jan. 10 at the Ma xwell Per forming Ar ts Theatre as par t of the Harry Jacobs Chamber Music Society 2002-2003 season and as par t of the ASU Lyceum Series. 860-5885.

TUESDAY’S MUSIC LIVE CONCERT SERIES: All performances in the concer t series held at noon at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church. Concer ts are free; optional catered lunch is $7 per person. 2002-2003 season schedule is as follows: Jan. 21, Joseph Gramley; Feb. 4, Lindsey McKee and Keith Shafer; Feb. 18, Cowboy Envy; March 4, The Augusta Children’s Chorale; March 18, Kari Gaf fney and Jef f Williams. 722-3463.

COMMUNITY HEALING MEDITATION DRUMMING CIRCLE hosted every third Monday of the month by IDRUM2U, the Not Gaddy Drumming Studio. Held 7-9 p.m. at the G.L. Jackson Conference Center, 1714 Nor th Leg Cour t. Fee is $5 or a donation of canned goods for the Golden Harvest Food Bank. All are welcome and drums will be available to rent. For info, phone the Not Gaddy Drumming Studio, 228-3200.

Theater

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“LAST CHANCE” will be per formed by the Augusta Mini Theatre Jan. 17, 10 and 11:30 a.m., for area schools and Jan. 18-19, 3 and 8 p.m., for the public at the Jack B. Patrick Technology Center on the campus of Augusta Technical College. Tickets are $10 for general admission and $8 for youth groups of 10 or more. Call 722-0598 to purchase tickets.

GRAND OPENING Friday & Saturday

“LION IN WINTER” Jan. 17-18, 24-26, 31 and Feb. 1 at the Aiken Community Playhouse’s new theatre in the Washington Center for the Per forming Ar ts. Call (803) 648-1438 for information and reservations.

NEIL SIMON’S “THE DINNER PARTY” will be performed by Stage III Jan. 16-19. Thursday through Saturday per formances star t at 7 p.m., are $25 per person and include dinner, while Sunday matinee begins at 3 p.m. and the cost is $15 per person. Call 228-3636 for more details or to make reservations.

this

Jan 10 & 11

NOW ON SALE: Tickets for “Les Miserables” Feb. 1116 at the Bell Auditorium. Call TicketMaster at 8287700 or visit www.ticketmaster.com.

Help us Celebrate with

Attractions

Free Tanning All Weekend

THE BOYHOOD HOME OF WOODROW WILSON: Circa 1859 Presby terian manse occupied by the family of President Woodrow Wilson as a child during the Civil War and Reconstruction. Original and period antiques, restored house, kitchen and carriage house.

419 Seventh Street. Open 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Tues.-Sat. Tours available; groups of 10 or more by appointment only. Admission is $5 adults, $4 seniors, $3 students under 18 and free for ages five and under. 722-9828.

AUGUSTA GOLF & GARDENS OF THE GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME features beautiful display gardens, as well as bronze sculptures of some of golf’s greatest masters. Available for rent for a variety of functions. Group discount rates available. Closed Mondays; open from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Tues.-Sat.; open from 1 to 5 p.m. on Sunday. Admission is $5.50 for adults; $4.50 for students, seniors and military; $3.50 for children (4 to 12); free for children 3 and under.

Sundays are two for one with a Super Sunday coupon. Annual garden memberships are available.

Call 724-4443 or 1-888-874-4443. Also, visit their Web site at www.gghf.org.

FORT DISCOVERY/NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER: Children and adults alike can immerse themselves in the wonders of science through live demonstrations, vir tual realities, Starlab, KidScape and more than 270

N O I T O L E f FRE ourtesy o C Samples

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S P I R I T J A N

“TARTUFFE,” presented by the National Players, will be at the ASU Per forming Ar ts Theatre Jan. 23, 2 and 7:30 p.m., as par t of ASU’s Lyceum Series. Tickets are $8 general admission and $6 special admission for senior citizens and area students for the evening per formance and $6 general admission and $4 special admission for the af ternoon per formance; ASU students, faculty and staf f are admit ted free. 737-1609.

DAVIDSON FINE ARTS SCHOOL DESSERT THEATRE Jan. 23-24, 7 p.m., in the Beverly J. Barnhar t Theatre.

Tickets are $8 adult, $6 senior citizens and children under 5 and $4 for Davidson Fine Ar ts students. Call 823-6924, ex t. 124 for more information.

M E T R O

SunSation Tanning Salon Walk-Ins Welcome or Call

828-0-TAN (828-0826)

located inside Jondal Salon 9th St. between Beamies & Boll Weevil

exhibits. General Admission: $8 for adults; 22 hands-on $6 for children, seniors and active military. Group

rates available. Half-price admission daily af ter 3 p.m.

M E Operating hours: Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday, T noon-5 p.m. Call 821-0200, 1-800-325-5445 or visit R their Web site at www.NationalScienceCenter.org.

O

REDCLIFFE STATE HISTORIC SITE: 1859 mansion of S.C. Governor James Henry Hammond, held by the family for three generations until 1975. Hours are 9 a.m.-6 p.m., Thursday-Monday on the grounds. House tours are noon-3 p.m. by appointment. Closed Tuesday and Wednesday. Admission to the grounds is free. Fee for house tours is $3 for adults and children ages 6 to J 17. For more information, call (803) 827-1473. 181 A Redclif fe Road, Beech Island.

S P I R I T

THE MUSEUM OF LAUREL AND HARDY OF HARLEM, GEORGIA features displays of various Laurel and Hardy memorabilia; films also shown. Located at 250 N. Louisville Street in downtown Harlem. Open 1-4 p.m. Thursday-Monday. For more information, call 556-3448.

LUNCH AT NOON LECTURE SERIES held the second Wednesday of every month at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Call the museum at 724-3576 for more information.

Special Events

N

9 SACRED HEART CULTUR AL CENTER is of fering tours

of its 100-year-old building. Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m.

2 $1 per person, children free. 826-4700.

0 0 HISTORIC COTTON EXCHANGE WELCOME CEN3 TER: Open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sun. 1-5

p.m. River walk. Free. 724-4067.

THE EZEKIEL HARRIS HOUSE: Deemed “the finest 18th century house surviving in Georgia” by the “Smithsonian Guide to Historic America.” Open Saturday, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. General admission is $2; senior admission is $1 and children get in for 50 cents. For more information, call 724-0436.

Museums “GLIMPSES OF THE CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT: 1957-1970” SCHOOL TOURS at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History. School tours in conjunction with the Civil Rights Movement program will be of fered Jan. 9-10; to schedule a visit, contact Christine Miller-Bet ts at 724-3576.

AT THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY: “Augusta, Ga.: Surviving Disaster” special exhibit on display through Jan. 12. January’s film is “The Founding of Georgia.” For more information, call 722-8454.

THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART in Ware’s Folly exhibits works by local and regional ar tists. Ar t classes, workshops and other educational programming for children, youth and adults are held in the Walker-Mackenzie Studio. Ware’s Folly galleries open Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Thursday, 10 a.m.-7 p.m.; and Saturday by appointment only. The Walker-Mackenzie Studio gallery is open Tuesday-Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Admission is free, but a donation of $2 for adults and $1 for children and seniors is encouraged. Call 722-5495 for more info.

THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY hosts permanent exhibition “Augusta’s Story,” an award-winning exhibit encompassing 12,000 years of local history.

For the younger crowd, there’s the Susan L. Still Children’s Discovery Gallery, where kids can learn about history in a hands-on environment. The museum also shows films in the History Theatre and hosts a variety of programs. Located at 560 Reynolds Street.

Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sunday 1-5 p.m. Admission is $4 adult, $3 seniors, $2 kids (6-18 years of age) and free for children under 6. Free admission on Sundays. Call 722-8454 or visit www.augustamuseum.org for more information.

THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART hosts exhibitions and special events year-round. Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sundays, noon-5 p.m. Closed on Mondays and major holidays. 1 Tenth Street, Augusta.

Call 724-7501 or visit www.themorris.org for details.

NINTH ANNUAL SIEGE OF AUGUSTA MINIATURES GAMING CONVENTION Jan. 17-19 at the Sheraton Augusta Hotel. Hand-painted toy soldiers will be on display and used in games, and educational seminars and bat tle recreations will be staged. Open to the public. For information, contact Jim, 868-0986, or Drew, 667-9847.

UNITY AWARD BREAKFAST in honor of the life and bir thday of Mar tin Luther King Jr. Held at 7:30 a.m.

Jan. 20 at the Radisson River front Hotel. Louise Rice is the keynote speaker. Tickets are $20; call Johnny Holmes at 796-3117 for more information.

PHI BETA SIGMA FR ATERNITY FOUNDERS DAY PROGR AM at Augusta State University’s Washington Hall Towers Jan. 11, 4-6 p.m. Clyde Hill will be the speaker. For information, contact Le Roy Grif fin, 7920456.

MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. LUNCHEON Jan. 15 at For t Gordon’s Gordon Club, 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m. Willie Bolden of Atlanta will be the guest speaker, and this year’s theme is “Remember, Celebrate, Act: A Day On, Not A Day Of f.” Call 791-2675 or 791-6648 for information.

MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. CELEBR ATION Jan. 17, 6 p.m., at the Smith-Hazel Recreation Center in Aiken.

Poetry readings, skits, musical per formances and more will be featured. Program is free, and people of all ages are invited to at tend. Call (803) 642-7635.

MASTER HYPNOTIST GARY CONRAD works his magic at the Fort Gordon Performing Arts Center Jan. 11, 8 and 10:30 p.m. Open to the public; all patrons are reminded to bring a photo I.D. for admission to Fort Gordon. Tickets are $10. Call 791-4389 or visit www.fortgordon.com for information.

DOG OBEDIENCE AND PUPPY SOCIALIZATION CLASS REGISTR ATION Jan. 15, 6:30-7:30 p.m. at Julian Smith Casino. Cost is $50 for the 12 week course and $40 for the 8 week course. Bring proof of vaccinations, but do not bring your dog to registration.

Call the Augusta Humane Society at 736-0186 for information.

2003 CULLUM LECTURE SERIES at Augusta State University begins Jan. 16. The title of this year’s series is “Frontiers in Motion: U.S.-Latin American and Caribbean Borderlands.” Jan. 16 Keynote Speech features Dr. Rober t Pastor’s lecture on “A Nor th American Community: Vision or Illusion?” Morning presentation 11:30 a.m.-12:45 p.m. in Butler Lecture Hall; evening presentation 7-8:15 p.m. in W1002 Science Building.

On Jan. 21, Jim Peach speaks on “The U.S.-Mexico Border: Economic and Demographic Interaction,”

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The work of Philip Morsberger will be on display at the Mary Pauline Gallery starting Jan. 10. An opening reception will be held at the gallery that night from 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. Dederick Ward also exhibits.

11:30 a.m.-12:45 p.m. and 7-8:15 p.m. in Butler Lecture Hall. For more information, visit www.aug.edu/library/cullum2003.

is located at 4534 Washington Rd. Free and open to the public. Call 363-FAMY for more information.

COLUMBIA COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. and every Sunday from 1 to 4 p.m. at PetsMar t. For more info, call 860-5020.

AUTHOR PROGR AM AT THE GIBBS LIBR ARY: Naomi Williams talks about “Two Rivers” Jan. 16, 6-8 p.m.

Call 863-1946 for more information.

AUGUSTA BALLET LEXUS R AFFLE to celebrate the 40th Anniversary of the Augusta Ballet. A Lexus SC 430 coupe will be raf fled of f during the intermission of the Feb. 8 “Romeo and Juliet” per formance at the Imperial Theatre. Tickets are $100 and may be purchased by calling 261-0555.

ANTIQUE APPR AISAL FAIR Jan. 10, 7-10 p.m. at the Aiken Center for the Ar ts. Evaluations are limited to two items per person in at tendance, and tickets are $25. For information, call (803) 641-9094.

RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL AND AUGUSTA ANIMAL RESCUE FRIENDS holds pet adoptions at Superpetz of f Bobby Jones Expressway every Sunday from 1 to 4 p.m. Call AARF at 364-4747 or visit www.aar f.net. Adoptions also held at the Richmond County Animal Control Shelter, Tues. through Sun., 1-5 p.m. Call the shelter at 790-6836.

JANUARY FILM SERIES at Headquar ters Library, Tuesdays at 6:30. Free admission. Jan. 14 showing of “Love and Death,” Jan. 21 showing of “Straight Story,” Jan. 28 showing of “The 400 Blows.” Call 821-2600.

LOW-COST R ABIES VACCINATIONS: AugustaRichmond County Animal Control holds low-cost rabies vaccination clinics the four th Sunday of every month for privately owned pets. $8 per animal. 1 p.m. at Superpetz. Dogs must be on a leash and cats in a carrier. Puppies and kit tens must be three months old and current for all vaccinations. Schedule subject to change, so please call 790-6836 to verify dates and times.

GR AND OPENING OF FAMILY Y COLUMBIA COUNTY BR ANCH Jan. 11, 9 a.m.-5 p.m. The Marshall Family Y

THE CSR A HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. and every

Augusta Opera Presents

Voted Best Steak In Augusta For 15 Years 1987-2002 2856 Washington Rd. 73-STEAK

1654 Gordon Hwy. 796-1875

Jan. 23 & 25, 2003 - 7:30pm

Jan. 26, 2003 - 3:00pm Imperial Theater

Tickets $12 - $40

Ticket Hotline:

Student & Senior Discounts available

826-4710 Production Sponsor

Four Seasons Securities, Inc.

J. Timothy Shelnut

www.AugustaOpera.com CSRA Business Monthly, Azalea Inn, Cellular One, Georgia Council for the Arts, Greater Augusta Arts Council, RedWolf, Inc., Marriott Hotel

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Wednesday evening from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. at the Pet Center located behind the GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Rd. 261-PETS.

Out of Town AT THE GEORGIA MUSEUM OF ART in Athens, Ga., Jan. 18-March 23: “There Is No Eye: Photographs by John Cohen” and “Visualizing the Blues: Images of the American South, 1862-1999.” Call (706) 542-4662 for information.

AT THE GEORGIA NATIONAL FAIRGROUNDS AND AGRICENTER in Perry, Ga.: Georgia Horse Fair Jan. 11-12, 1-888-637-4255; Cut ting Horse Show Jan. 1619, (770) 943-4929; Southeastern Exotic Bird Show Jan. 18-19, (770) 593-3692; HQHA Quar ter Horse Show Jan. 24-26, (770) 227-2159. Also, tickets are now on sale for the Georgia National Rodeo, Feb. 2022. Call (478) 987-3247 or 1-800-987-3247 for info.

HANNAH’S BUDDIES GOLF TOURNAMENT AND CONCERT BENEFIT to fight spinal muscular atrophy Jan. 18 at Disney World’s Lake Buena Vista Golf Club and House of Blues in Orlando, Fla. Widespread Panic singer and guitarist John Bell will per form at the concer t and host the tournament. For more information, or to inquire about par ticipating, contact Duncan Elliot t at (813) 334-5877 or at fightsma@tampabay.rr.com.

U.S. HOT ROD SUPERBOWL OF MOTORSPORTS Jan. 11 at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta. Tickets are $10$25 and can be purchased online at www.ticketmaster.com or by phone at 828-7700.

“LILLY’S PURPLE PLASTIC PURSE” will be presented Jan. 11-26 by Alliance Children’s Theatre. Tickets are $12.50 for children and $15 for adults. Special Families Centerstage per formance Jan. 18, 11 a.m.-3 p.m. is $25 and includes per formance, lunch and additional activities. Held at the Woodruff Ar ts Center in Atlanta.

Call (404) 733-5000 for tickets.

month. The blood center is urging people of all blood types to donate in order to combat a blood supply shor tage. For detailed information on locations and times to donate, visit www.shepeardblood.org. You may also call Susan Edwards at (803) 643-7996 for information on Aiken locations and Nancy Szocinski at 737-4551 for information on all other locations.

Development Center Network: Star ting Your Own Business, Jan. 14; Smar t Marketing, Jan. 16; Writing a Business Plan, Jan. 21; Small Business Bookkeeping, Jan. 28. All classes cost $35 and are held 6:30-8:30 p.m. in the Business Outreach Services Augusta of fice. Call 737-1790 for information and registration.

AMERICAN RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVES at the Aiken Red Cross Blood Center on Millbrook Drive and the Augusta Red Cross Blood Center on Pleasant Home Road. The bloodmobile will also stop at various area locations this week. For a complete list, call the Aiken Blood Center at (803) 642-5180 or the Augusta Blood Center at 868-8800.

BRIDGE CLASSES at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken.

Beginner class is held Jan. 14-March 4 and intermediate class is held March 25-May 20. Cost is $20 per person, plus a $14 materials fee that must be paid at the first class. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

Learning WOMEN IN BUSINESS WORKSHOP Jan. 21, 11:30 a.m. at Pullman Hall. Johnnie Sheats will speak on “Leadership vs. Management.” Admission is $12 in advance or $15 at the door. Call the Augusta Metro Chamber of Commerce at 821-1300 for additional information.

SMALL BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT COURSES to be of fered in January by the University of Georgia Business Outreach Services Small Business

COMPUTER CLASSES AT THE WALLACE BRANCH LIBRARY: “Basic Computer Skills Training” Jan. 9, 16, 23 and 30, 11 a.m.-12:30 p.m. “Intermediate Computer Class” Jan. 9, 6-7:30 p.m. To register for either class, call 722-6275.

INTRODUCTION TO COMPUTERS FOR ADULTS Jan. 10, 17, 24 and 31 at the Ma x well Branch Librar y.

Call 793-6758 to register.

AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONTINUING EDUCATION is now of fering the following classes: Medical Terminology With Basic Anatomy and Physiology, Advanced Medical Coding, Tai Chi, Yoga, Computer Literacy for Seniors, a Foreign Language series and more. Also, ASU of fers online courses. For more information, call 737-1636 or visit www.ced.aug.edu.

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AIKEN TECH CONTINUING EDUCATION will of fer the following courses in January: Intro to Computers, Windows 2000 Basic Concepts, Health Care courses, Rape Aggression Defense, Beginning Cake Decorating, Professional Cooking, Real Estate courses and more.

Aiken Tech also of fers Education to Go classes online.

For more information or to register, call (803) 5939231, ex t. 1230.

Health CPR AND FIRST AID CLASSES will be of fered by the Augusta Red Cross in January. Adult CPR and First Aid class runs Jan. 13-14, 6-9:30 p.m. Adult, Infant and Child CPR and First Aid class runs Jan. 15-16, 610 p.m. Held at the Augusta Red Cross of fices, 1322 Ellis St. Call 724-8483 for information.

“WHAT CAN NEUROSURGERY DO FOR ME?” free heal th education class Jan. 9, 2:30 p.m. at the Life Learning Center’s Downtown Division. To enroll, call 733-0188, ex t. 7989.

PEACHCARE FOR KIDS AND RIGHT FROM THE START MEDICADE of fers free or low-cost health coverage to qualifying families. Coverage includes prena-

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“A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM” through Feb. 9 at the New American Shakespeare Tavern in Atlanta. Tuesday-Saturday performances at 7:30 p.m.; Sunday per formances at 6:30 p.m. Tickets are $19.50 Thursdays and Sundays, $22.50 Fridays and $24.50 on Saturdays, with $10 Tuesday and Wednesday night per formances. Student and group discounts available. Optional British pubstyle menu served one hour and fif teen minutes prior to show. Call (404) 874-5299 for reservations.

ADOPTION INFORMATION SESSION at the Independent Adoption Center in Tucker, Ga., Jan. 11.

Held from 9:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Make reservations by calling 1-800-385-4016 or (404) 321-6900.

“TWENTY YEARS AGO” will be presented by NarroWay Productions Winter Dinner Theatre in Myr tle Beach, S.C., on Fridays and Saturdays in January and Feb. 14-15. Tickets are $24.95 or $23.95 for groups and senior citizens. To make reservations, call (803) 802-2300 or 1-888-437-7473.

“FOR THIS WORLD AND BEYOND: AFRICAN ART FROM THE FRED AND RITA RICHMAN COLLECTION” through May 25 at the High Museum of Ar t in Atlanta.

Call (404) 733-HIGH or visit www.high.org for info.

TICKETS FOR “VAREK AI,” a production by the Cirque du Soleil, now on sale. Shows are March 6-30 at Cumberland Galleria in Atlanta. Visit www.cirquedusoleil.com for more information.

“DEFINING CR AFT I: COLLECTING FOR THE NEW MILLENNIUM” exhibit at the Columbia Museum of Ar t in Columbia, S.C., through Feb. 23. For more information, call the museum at (803) 799-2810 or visit www.columbiamuseum.org.

“PARIS IN THE AGE OF IMPRESSIONISM: MASTERWORKS FROM THE MUSEE D’ORSAY” will be at the High Museum of Art in Atlanta now through March 16. This exhibition marks the first time since the Orsay opened that pieces in its collection have traveled to the U.S. For more information, visit www.ParisinAtlanta.org, www.high.org, or call (404) 733-HIGH.

Benefits

DON’T LIVE WITH PAIN...LIVE YOUR LIFE! "There were days when the pain was so bad...

I couldn't work or do anything! That was before I found the Walton Pain Center.

Now with therapy, and my pain management program, I have my job ...and my family back.

Don't live with pain...live your life!

Ask your physician for a referral or call the

Whether you are experiencing a little pain, the Walton Pain Center can help you explore your options.

Our center provides assistance from a committed, caring and experienced staff that specializes in the treatment of acute and chronic pain.

Your physician will work with you to develop a pain management program that may include options such as physical therapy, aquatic therapy, therapeutic massage, medical acupuncture, nutritional and behavioral specialists, and wellness programs.

Walton Pain Center today! Take control: Live your life!"

Call (706) 823-5294 today to schedule your consultation.

AUGUSTA ICE BOWL Jan. 25 to benefit the Golden Harvest Food Bank at the Lake Olmstead Disc Golf Course. A $20 donation is required. Registration begins at 8 a.m. and the first round of play begins at 10 a.m. Call Sue Anne at 737-6095 for more information.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER BLOOD DRIVES in various locations around the CSRA this

1355 INDEPENDENCE DRIVE | AUGUSTA, GA 30901 | 706-823-5294 |

www.wrh.org

23 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

care, hospitalization, vaccines, dental and vision 24 tal care and is available to pregnant women of all ages

Development at 821-1834.

GOLDEN HARVEST FOOD BANK needs volunteers during the day, Monday-Friday, to help sor t donated products and assist in their agency shopping area. Help is needed year-round. If you are able to lif t 25 pounds and would like to help fight hunger in the Augusta area, contact Laurie Roper at 736-1199, ex t. 208.

and to children through age 19. Contact the RSM

M E Project at 729-2086 or 721-5611 for information.

T R YOGA CLASSES at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital are O held on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 7-8 a.m. for S P I R I T

$45/month or 10:30 a.m. to noon for $55/month. Call 823-6294.

THOROUGHBRED R ACING HALL OF FAME DOCENTS NEEDED: Duties include opening and closing the Hall of Fame, greeting visitors and providing information about museum exhibits. Call Lisa Hall, (803) 642-7650 for information.

FREE HIV/AIDS TESTING every Tuesday from 4 to 7 p.m. at St. Stephen’s Ministry, 922 Greene Street.

Free anonymous testing, pre- and post-test counseling and education.

J A N HATHA YOGA CLASSES at the St. Joseph Home 9 2 0 0 3

OLDER AMERICANS ACT SENIOR NUTRITION PROGR AM is looking for volunteers to serve meals to needy older residents. To volunteer, contact the Senior Citizens Council at 826-4480. For those in need of home-delivered meals, call 210-2018 or toll free at 1888-922-4464.

Health Care Center in Daniel Village Plaza. Held 10 a.m. to noon Monday, Wednesday and Friday and 6:30-8:30 p.m. Monday through Thursday. $10 per class or $60 a month for unlimited classes. Mats are provided, but bring a towel and a water bot tle. Call Tess at 738-2782 for more information.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL: New volunteer orientation is scheduled the first Monday of each month at 6 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Schedule subject to change; call 790-6836 to verify dates and times.

A FREE WOMEN’S HEALTH CLINIC is held from 6-8 p.m. on Tuesdays at the Salvation Army and Welfare Center, 1383 Greene St. Services include Pap smear, breast exam and the diagnosis and treatment of sexually transmit ted diseases. For more info or an appointment, call the St. Vincent dePaul Health Center at 8283444.

THE CSR A HUMANE SOCIETY is looking for animal lovers willing to donate a lit tle of their time. Volunteers are needed every Saturday at the Pet Center located behind GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Road. Call 261-PETS for more info.

W.G. WATSON, M.D., WOMEN’S CENTER CONDUCTS EDUCATION CLASSES at University Hospital. Course topics include Lamaze, breast feeding, parenting and grandparenting. Par tners will learn positive suppor t techniques. There are also programs designed to help older siblings adjust to new family members. Some classes are free, while others require a fee.

Registration is required by calling 774-2825.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER is seeking donors to prevent a blood supply shor tage. To donate call 737-4551, 854-1880 or (803) 643-7996.

Meetings

Kids

CSR A WRITERS meets Jan. 14, 6:30 p.m. at Barnes and Noble Booksellers. Writers in need of a suppor t group are invited to at tend and bring six copies of a manuscript to be critiqued. For information, contact Lela Turnbull, 738-4114.

SPRING SOCCER REGISTR ATION Jan. 15-21 at Citizens Park II in Aiken. Open to boys and girls ages 5 and older by Sept. 1, 2003; teams will be divided by age and players will compete in league play. First-time players must bring a bir th cer tificate to register. For information, call (803) 642-7761.

“RUMPLESTILTSKIN” will be presented by ASU’s Born to Read Literacy Center and Patchwork Players Jan. 13 at 9, 10 and 11 a.m. at the Ma xwell Per forming Ar ts Theatre. Tickets are $3 per person and seating is on a first come, first serve basis. Call 733-7043 for information and reservations.

AT THE FAMILY Y: Spring soccer registration through Jan. 18 for children 4-14 years old at the Wheeler Branch, 738-6678.

FAMILY FUN DAY POTTERY WORKSHOP at the Augusta Museum of History Jan. 12, 2-4 p.m. Learn how to throw a pot with Jeanet te James and other area pot ters. The program is free. Call 722-8454 for info.

AFTER-SCHOOL PROGR AM at the Smith-Hazel Recreation Center in Aiken January through May, 2-6 p.m. Open to kids ages 5-13. Call (803) 642-7635.

CHILDREN’S LEARNING CENTER at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History open Monday-Friday, 4:30-6:30 p.m., through June. For information, call 724-3576.

ACADEMIC HELP AND TUTORING available Saturdays, 2:30-4:30 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 722-6275 to make arrangements.

GIRLS INCORPOR ATED AFTER-SCHOOL PROGR AM runs through the end of the 2002-2003 school year. A variety of programs will be of fered. Services include van pick-up at select schools, evening drop-of f, homework room and hot evening meal. Open to girls in kindergar ten through high school. Af ter-school program of fered 2:30-6 p.m. Mon.-Fri. For more information, call 733-2512.

YOUTH LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT SKILLS PROGR AM for teens ages 12-19 held the third Saturday of the month at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black Histor y. Call 724-3576.

WEEKLY STORY SESSIONS at all branch libraries.

Visit www.ecgrl.public.lib.ga.us for more information.

FIRST SATURDAY STORYTELLING at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum. In addition, there is a tour of the museum. Held 10 a.m. to noon the first Saturday of the month. Call 724-3576.

The Harry Jacobs Chamber Music Society and ASU’s Lyceum Series bring the Gryphon Trio to the Maxwell Performing Arts Theatre Jan. 10.

THE MINDBENDER/DMDA DEPRESSIVE AND MANICDEPRESSIVE ASSOCIATION OF GREATER AUGUSTA meets Jan. 15 at 6 p.m. Meeting is held in Room 105 of the Walton Building at First Baptist Church of Augusta. Call 733-2236 for more information.

Weekly

Seniors PEOPLE WITH ARTHRITIS CAN EXERCISE (PACE) meets at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital Tuesdays and Thursdays from 1-2 p.m. Call 823-5294.

THE SENIOR CITIZENS COUNCIL OF GREATER AUGUSTA AND THE CSR A of fers a variety of classes, including aerobics, quilting, tai chi, Spanish, painting, line dancing, bowling, bridge, computers, yoga and pinochle. For dates and times, phone 826-4480.

ARTHRITIS AQUATICS of fered Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital. Classes meet 9-9:45 a.m., 10-10:45 a.m. or 12:15-1 p.m. $37.50/month. To register, call 733-5959.

SENIORNET provides adults age 50 and over education for and access to computer technology. Many different courses are of fered. Contact the USC-Aiken Continuing Education Of fice at (803) 641-3563.

Sports 2003 AUGUSTA OPEN DRUG-FREE POWERLIFTING CHAMPIONSHIPS is hosted by the Py thon Power League of Augusta and features bench press only, deadlif t only, iron man and full power events. Held Jan. 18, 10 a.m. at the Mar tial Ar ts Tournament Center on Peach Orchard Rd. For more information or to enter, contact Tee Meyers, 790-3806.

GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME ANNUAL INDUCTION BANQUET Jan. 11, 7 p.m., at the Radisson River front Hotel. Tickets are $90 per person or $720 for a table of eight. For reservations, call Dianne King, 724-4443.

TEN STAR ALL-STAR BASKETBALL CAMP is now accepting applications for its summer programs. Boys and girls ages 10-19 are eligible. Call (704) 373-0873 for information.

2003 EAST COAST SILVER GLOVES BOXING CHAM-

PIONSHIPS Jan. 10-11, 7 p.m., at May Park Gym. Boxers from eight states will compete for the right to at tend the National Silver Gloves Boxing Championship. Tickets are $4 adult and $2 child and are available through the Augusta Boxing Club. Call 733-7533 for more information.

THE FIRST STEP DIVORCE RECOVERY WORKSHOP Sundays through Feb. 9, 4-6 p.m. in Room 201 of the Walton Building at First Baptist Church of Augusta.

Meetings are free to the public and no pre-registration is required; however, you must call to reserve childcare for children age 5 and under. 731-5355.

UPCOMING AUGUSTA LYNX HOME GAMES: Jan. 1112 and 17, Feb. 7-8, 12, 14-15, 20, 22-23 and 28 and March 1, 14-15, 19, 21-22, 25, 28 and 30. For tickets, call the Lynx ticket of fice at 724-4423.

WALT DISNEY PIN TR ADING GROUP is forming for all those interested in collecting and trading pins from Walt Disney World, Disneyland and other Disney resor ts. For more information, contact Tim Conway, 729-9900.

TICKETS NOW ON SALE for the Augusta GreenJackets 2003 season. Home games at Lake Olmstead Stadium.

Tickets available at www.tixonline.com or by phone at (803) 278-4TIX. There is also a TIX outlet inside Harmon Optical in Southgate Plaza.

GEORGIA-CAROLINA TOASTMASTERS meets Wednesdays at noon at the Clubhouse, 2567 Washington Rd. $8 for lunch; visitors welcome. 8609854.

YOUTH MONTHLY SPARRING the last Thursday of the month, 5:30 p.m., at the Augusta Boxing Club. Call 733-7533.

Volunteer GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART DOCENT TR AINING PROGR AM: Volunteers will guide”If Walls Could Talk” tour, featuring the histor y and architecture of Ware’s Folly. Contact the Education Director at 722-5495 for more information.

“A CALL TO SERVICE DAY” PROGR AM Jan. 14 in the Auditorium of the Information Technology Center at Augusta Technical College. Walton Options teams up with the Statewide Independent Living Council of Georgia in an outreach ef for t to encourage people with disabilities to par ticipate in national service programs. Sessions are 10:30 a.m.-noon and 1:30-3:30 p.m. and are free. Contact Jeannie Jackson, 724-6262 for more information.

THE EARNED INCOME TAX CREDIT COALITION CAMPAIGN seeks volunteers to prepare basic ta x returns for low/limited income individuals, those with disabilities, non-English speakers and the elderly. Volunteers receive free training and instruction materials from the IRS. Call the Mayor’s Of fice for Work force

SEX AHOLICS ANONYMOUS, a 12-step program of recover y from addiction to obsessive/compulsive sexual thoughts and behaviors, meets Wednesdays at 8 p.m. and Saturdays at 7 p.m. at Augusta Counselling Ser vices. Call 723-3688 and leave first name and phone number; a confidential reply is assured.

AUGUSTA TOASTMASTERS CLUB #326 meets Thursdays at 7:30 p.m. at Advent Lutheran Church.

Call 868-8431.

BUSINESS NETWORKERS INTERNATIONAL Augusta Chapter meets every Thursday morning from 7 to 8:30 a.m. in the Par tridge Inn main dining room. All professionals welcome; breakfast provided for a fee. Call Stuar t Rayburn, 737-0050.

RIVERWALK TOASTMASTERS meets Mondays, 7 p.m. in Classroom 3 at University Hospital. Call Gale Kan, 855-7071.

GUIDELINES: Public Ser vice announcements are listed in this section without charge at the discretion of the editor. Announcements must be received by Monday at noon and will be included as space permits. Send to Events, The Metropolitan Spirit, P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914 or fa x (706) 7336663. You may also e-mail listings to rhonda_jones@metspirit.com or lisa_jordan@metspirit.com. Listings cannot be taken over the phone.

25

Arts: Visual

M E T R O

Martha Simkins: An American Impressionist?

S P I R I T

BY RHONDA JONES

J A N

S

o what’s so great about Martha Simkins? The Spirit asked in its inimitably charming way.

Robert Horn, curator and organizer of “Martha Simkins Rediscovered,” a show coming to us from New York, said, “I think just on a regional level, looking at her work from a Dallas and a state of Texas point of view, she is by far, just talking on a regional level, just a highly qualified artist in how she handles the subject matter.”

She has been compared to Johannes Vermeer, a Dutch painter living from 1632-1675.

“I personally would not compare her to anyone,” Horn said. He doesn’t like the idea of comparing artists at all in art review and criticism. Vermeer is a hard guy to get to know anyway, he said.

“You probably know, Vermeer is one of the most difficult people to get a handle on because there are no more than 20-odd paintings available in the whole world.

There are other people who she’s much closer to.”

He mentioned, specifically, William Merritt Chase, who was a mentor of Simkins’.

“And there’s no question. You can see, in her work, Chase. And if you look at hundreds of paintings of Chase you can see the training of the eye, the way that Chase trained his painters to try to capture the essence of someone’s likeness, someone’s face.”

Chase was one of several American painters who in the late 19th century developed a taste for the French movement known as Impressionism.

But, Horn said, despite how history has labeled her, he doesn’t really lump her in with the Impressionists. “I consider her more of a realist painter,” he said, adding that, along with still lifes, she tended to paint portraits of children and wellknown people in Dallas, Texas, her home.

“Yes, there is some broken brushwork in her work,” he said, but added that she didn’t tend to paint landscapes and seascapes, subjects which fairly leap onto Impressionistic canvases.

“It’s difficult to label someone,” Horn said. He said that, if you really pay close attention to her work you will see that she doesn’t actually fit into any category, and supposes that she is called an Impressionist because she studied at the Art Students League in New York during the time when the great American Impressionists were painting.

“American Impressionism had its main time in the sun from 1885 to 1920 and that’s about it,” he said.

American Impressionists flocked to France to study under French Impressionists like Claude Monet, but Simkins wasn’t among them, Horn said.

In addition, he said, it was customary for

9

Receive this free t-shirt during the month of January at any Shepeard Community Blood Center location.

Shepeard Community Blood Center challenges eligible donors to step forward and give blood during January 2003 as part of National Volunteer Blood Donor Month. This call to action comes at a time when blood is traditionally in short supply due to the holidays, travel schedules, inclement weather and illness. For more information call 737-4551 or visit our website at www.shepeardblood.org.

aspiring artists to not only study in New York, but to move in, set up shop, make their careers and homes there. Not Simkins. “She had a love affair with New York for a few months a year for a short period of time,” Horn said.

“I think the most important thing about the exhibit is that this is a wonderful exhibition of a female artist,” Horn said.

She made her living from her art much of the time, and in tough times at that. “The first world war had come to an end,” he said.

“She obviously did very fine work since she was written up as one of the finest portrait painters in America, and received many, many commissions from the leading citizens of Dallas and of Texas.”

Martha Simkins lived to the ripe old age of 103, and continued to test herself and take classes well into her 90s.

If you would like to see what’s so great about Martha Simkins and hear about American Impressionism, visit the Morris Museum of Art in January. “Martha Simkins Rediscovered” opens Jan. 17 and runs through April 20. On Jan. 16, at 6 p.m., in the museum auditorium, there will be a lecture on American Impressionism by Dr. Janice Simon, associate professor of art history with the University of Georgia. General admission is $3; seniors, students and military personnel get in for $2. A members’ preview and reception follows the lecture, which is free for members, $10 for nonmembers. Call (706) 724-7501 for info.

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE The Metropolitan Spirit has a full time, entry level sales position available.

The ideal candidate is ambitious, self-motivated, competitive, persuasive, positive, creative, and a great communicator in person and on paper.

Account executives develop new business, work with clients and production artists to create ads that get results.

If you possess an entrepreneurial drive and are up for a challenge with big rewards, please send your resume, with cover letter to:

Advertising Sales c/o The Metropolitan Spirit P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914 or fax to 706-733-6663 EOE

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26 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N

Cinema

“Two Weeks Notice”

9

Movie Listings About Schmidt (R) — Sad, very sad. Not only because Jack Nicholson is playing a sour, dumpy bore, but because the movie is a bore. As Schmidt, he's the lit tle American loser who set tled for mediocre, false comfor t through conformity, but Alexander Payne directs as if this dull fact is a fresh revelation.

The film is iner t, rarely funny, rarely dramatic, though Kathy Bates swings her jived bulk into a hot tub and briefly sparks Jack into an inkling of his stellar self; then he shrinks. Sad. 2 hrs. (Elliot t) ★ Adaptation (R) — "Adaptation" is an occasionally inspired film about a writer stymied by his screenplay.

Nicolas Cage plays both Charlie Kaufman and his brother (who isn't real), Donald, a sor t of creative antibody. Cage's Charlie is a sweat bag of fear about every idea, frantic about losing his hair and not appealing to women he can barely approach; Don is an upbeat, pushy doof prone to bad jokes and happily stupid at titude. Beyond the doubled Cage compulsion (good acting, even bet ter tech work), the film has rich filler.

Cast: Nicolas Cage, Meryl Streep, Chris Cooper, Cara Seymour, Tilda Swinton. Running time: 1 hr., 54 mins.

(Elliot t) ★★★1/2 Antwone Fisher (PG-13) — Denzel Washington directed himself, as a Navy psychiatrist in San Diego, and Derek Luke as Fisher, a sailor spikey with anger because of his tormented youth. Washington's authority is manifest and humane, the story has moments of honest searching, but the appealing Luke never quite gives us the pain of a truly agonized man. 1 hr., 53 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Barbershop (PG-13) — In this day in the wacky life of a Chicago salon, the rapper/actor Ice Cube drops his rough, gruf f image to play Calvin, the current owner of the barbershop. The shop was passed down to him from his dad and has been a mainstay of the community for years. Calvin couldn't care less, because he has a pregnant wife and wants to make money fast. In a moment of stupidity, he sells the place to the neighborhood loan shark. Af ter spending a day talking with customers and fellow barbers, he realizes the impor tance of the shop. He then has to buy back the shop at double the price. Meanwhile at the barbershop itself, tensions begin to rise. Cast: Ice Cube, Anthony Anderson, Sean Patrick Thomas, Eve, Troy Garity, Michael Ealy and Cedric the Enter tainer.

Running time: 1 hr., 42 mins. (McCormick) ★★★ Brown Sugar (PG-13) — "Brown Sugar " is a romantic comedy focusing on two childhood friends who have both found success in the world of hip-hop: one is an A&R executive at a record label and the other is the editor of a glossy music mag. Even though they’re both involved with others, the two find that they may have already found love – years ago with each other. Cast: Sanaa Latham, Taye Diggs, Queen Latifah, Mos Def. Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) — From the

breezy opening credits done in '60s hip style, Steven Spielberg's charmed enter tainment flies along with confidence. Leonardo DiCaprio is entirely engaging as Frank Abagnale Jr., con ar tist and ace kiter of checks, pursued with increasingly caring fixation by Tom Hanks as a square FBI man. Christopher Walker is the smooth-talking flop dad whom Frank yearns to impress. 2 hrs., 15 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Die Another Day (PG-13) — Pierce Brosnan moves with energy and can fake conviction. His chest hair is superb, his voice remains Bondaceous. But he looks peaked, and we imagine he found time to remember when acting meant, well, acting. Not just pulverizing glass, plunging through ice, brandishing absurd weapons and making limp jokes. True to its Cold War roots, the series reaches for one more rot ten Commie enemy. So bring on dear old Nor th Korea. A Pyongyang lunatic has found the resources, via diamonds, to create a satellite sun called Icarus, to burn or blind the dumb Yanks, the snot ty Brits and the greedy South Korean stooges. He captures Bond, tor tures him, then zips off to Cuba, where he is DNA-morphed into a sneery Brit named Graves (Toby Stephens). We recall Connery, and old plots that, however abundantly silly, were adventurous larks and not just plastic shelves for hardware display. Cast: Pierce Brosnan, Halle Berry, Toby Stephens, Rosamund Pike, John Cleese, Judi Dench, Rick Yune.

Running time: 2 hrs. (Elliot t) ★★ Drumline (PG-13) — A young street drummer from Harlem wins a scholarship to at tend a Southern university and decides to make the trek af ter being convinced by the university’s band director, even though he knows he’ll have a hard time fit ting in.

Gradually, his drumming skills help the other students warm up to him. Cast: Nick Cannon, Orlando Jones, Zoe Saldana, Jason Weaver.

Friday After Next (R) — This is the third film in the "Friday" series and features the same people, places and pals highlighted in the first two. "Friday Af ter Nex t" takes place around Christmas, as Craig and Day-Day are working as security guards af ter a "ghet to Santa" who’s been stealing presents. Cast: Ice Cube, Mike Epps, Don "D.C." Curry.

Gangs of New York (R) — Mar tin Scorsese's film is not a bore and is never less than a show, but it feels like having obscure history lessons hammered into your skull. Filmed with potboiler instincts, this pungent flux of pre-glam New York centers on the rather my thic precinct of crime called the Five Points.

The plot, a slender bone in an obese production, involves the arrival of the Irish in New York City in 1846 and af ter. They face the prejudice of a nativist gang of thugs, allied with young Tammany Hall. Cast: Leonardo DiCaprio, Daniel Day-Lewis, Cameron Diaz, Jim Broadbent, Henry Thomas, Liam Neeson, Brendan Gleeson. 2 hrs., 40 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Ghost Ship (R) — A salvage crew on a mission discovers an abandoned passenger ship, missing since

RATINGS

★★★★ — Excellent.

Warner Bros.

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1953, floating on a lone stretch of the Bering Sea. When the crew decides to tow the passenger ship back, strange things begin to happen. Cast: Gabriel Byrne, Juliana Margulies, Desmond Harrington.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (PG) — Harry (Daniel Radclif fe) faces destiny with a clear eye and spor ty will, not the least neurotic despite having been orphaned into a family of idiotic prigs who treat him abominably. He again escapes to Hogwar ts, to his pals (Ruper t Grint as wobble-faced Ron, Emma Watson as bookworm Hermione) and the snippish regard of Prof. Snape (Alan Rickman) and Prof.

McGonegall (Maggie Smith), and the wonder ful giant Hagrid (Robbie Coltrane) and Headmaster Dumbledore (Richard Harris, now dead). Jason Isaacs should be given more time as Lucius, the evil, white-maned father of snob Draco Malfoy. There is a sense of a grand machine greased, sometimes grinding. The "chamber of secrets" is less an exciting mystery at the center than a device to car t the bulky saga forward.

Cast: Daniel Radclif fe, Ruper t Grint, Emma Watson, Kenneth Branagh, Richard Harris, Alan Rickman, Maggie Smith, Robbie Coltrane. Running time: 2 hrs., 41 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ The Hot Chick (PG-13) — If the name isn’t enough to scare you, perhaps the idea that a vapid teenage girl wakes up to find herself inhabiting Rob Schneider’s body is. In the course of trying to get back to her true self, the popular teen discovers just how shallow she is. Cast: Rob Schneider, Andrew Keegan, Mat thew Lawrence.

I Spy (PG-13) — Eddie Murphy and Owen Wilson have a cute par tnership in "I Spy," but the movie around them is so of ten nearly nothing that their charm doesn't do a load of good. Murphy is Kelly, the world middleweight boxing champ and Wilson is Alex, junior agent and wannabe Bond. They are recruited by

★★★— Worthy.

★★ — Mixed.

★ — Poor.

President Bush for a super mission to Budapest, involving a nuclear stealth plane and a crazed Asian leader being armed by a sociopath (Malcolm McDowell). The plot junk weighs rather heavily on this air-zoned comedy, given the current world situation.

Probably the core template for the teaming is the old Hope-Crosby vehicles. Cast: Eddie Murphy, Owen Wilson, Famke Janssen, Malcolm McDowell, Gary Cole. Running time: 1 hr., 40 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Jonah: A Veggie Tales Movie (G) — The animated group of vegetables that stars in the "Veggie Tales" car toons comes to the big screen in "Jonah." A van of singing veggies breaks down in front of a strange seafood joint inhabited by a lazy bunch of pirates who proceed to spin the tale of Jonah and the whale for the impressionable young vegetables. Cast: Phil Vischer, Kristin Blegen, Mike Nawrocki, Lisa Vischer. Running time: 1 hr., 23 mins.

Just Married (PG-13) — Sarah, who comes from a well-to-do, snobbish family, falls in love with a traf fic repor ter — much to her family’s chagrin. The happy couple embarks on a honeymoon plagued by bad luck and the inter ference of Sarah’s ex-boy friend, commissioned by her family to split up the fledgling marriage. Cast: Ashton Kutcher, Brit tany Murphy, Christian Kane, David Moscow.

Kangaroo Jack (PG) — Two pals from Brooklyn are somehow forced into delivering mob money to a location in Australia. In the Outback, they spy a cute photo op when one of them puts his jacket on a kangaroo. Af ter the kangaroo bounces away, still clad in his new outerwear, the two men realize the money was in the jacket and give chase. Cast: Jerry O’Connell, Anthony Anderson, Estella Warren, Christopher Walken.

Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG13) — Long, violent, death-fixated, dark in tone, heavy

0— Not worthy.

“Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers”

27

“Catch Me If You Can”

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N

New Line Cinema

Dreamworks Pictures

9

in heroic mood, this is a film for addicts of the series.

Lit tle Frodo is marginalized as Viggo Mor tensen leads the defense of a castle from hordes of vicious scumballs, and the two grand beards (Ian McKellan, Christopher Lee) contend for Middle Ear th. There's a little schizo in a wispy loincloth, expressively per formed and voiced, but the almost Stone Age mythology rolls over us like layers of geology. 3 hrs. (Elliot t) ★★ Maid in Manhattan (PG-13) — The airy fantasy puts Jennifer Lopez into a cute maid's uniform at a swank New York hotel. She's Marisa, and when she tries on the very expensive, if rather Bel Air trophy wife out fit of a snobbish guest, this at tracts the "playboy" eye of senatorial hopeful Chris Marshall (Ralph Fiennes). Chris' manager (Stanley Tucci) is in control-freak agony that the Republican politician might fall in love with someone not toity and rich. The film is most marked by the flagrant waste of talent. As the sitcom yucks racked up their lit tle nif ties, perked along by music, I had a weird, tiny pinch of nostalgia for "Jackass: The Movie." Cast: Jennifer Lopez, Ralph Fiennes, Bob Hoskins, Natasha Richardson, Stanley Tucci, Tyler Garcia Posey. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliot t) ★1/2 Narc (R) — An undercover narcotics officer (Jason Patric), himself a recovering drug addict, is brought back to active duty to investigate a young cop’s murder.

The fallen officer’s par tner (Ray Liot ta), who is out for revenge, teams up with him for the investigation. Cast: Ray Liot ta, Jason Patric, Chi McBride, Busta Rhymes.

Pinocchio (G) — "Pinocchio" is the latest Italian impor t from Rober to Benigni, who stars as the title character of the classic fairy tale. An Italian toymaker produces a wooden puppet who desperately wants to be a real boy. It’s in Italian, with English subtitles. Cast: Rober to Benigni, Nicolet te Braschi, Carlo Giuf fre.

Real Women Have Curves (PG-13) — Ana is a Mexican-American girl, recently graduated from high school and living with her working-class family in East L.A. Ana’s English teacher and mentor encourages her to apply to college, but her mother insists Ana stay and work at a dressmaking factory with the rest of the family. She applies to Columbia University on the sly, but it’s in the factory that Ana’s eyes are opened to corporate injustice, and where she opens the other workers’ eyes to these and other oppressions perpetu-

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ated by the fashion industry. Cast: America Ferrera, Lupe Ontiveros, Ingrid Oliu, George Lopez.

The Santa Clause 2 (G) — Tim Allen discovers af ter eight years of being Santa that there's another small detail in his contract: In order for him to continue being the Jolly Old Elf, he's got to take a wife. But first he has to deal with his son, Charlie (Eric Lloyd), who's landed himself on the naughty list. Charlie's principal (Elizabeth Mitchell) wants him gone pronto and is a bit blue because the holidays don't mean as much to her as they once did. With 28 days to go before the contract expires, Santa's got a lot of work to do. One of his trusty elves comes up with a machine that can duplicate Santa while he's out in the real world hunting for a wife. Allen is remarkable playing Santa as funny, wise and sympathetic, all at the same time. 1 hr., 42 mins. (McCormick) ★★★ Signs (PG-13) — Mel Gibson plays Father Graham Hess, an Episcopal priest who lost his faith and retired his collar af ter his wife was killed in an auto accident.

He lives in an old farmhouse with two adorable kids, plus a younger brother (Joaquin Phoenix). Big, elegantly precise "crop signs" turn up in their cornfield.

It's space aliens, and the movie teases us as the signs pile up. The aliens show up, shoving clawed hands under doors but scared by steak knives, full of evil strength, yet not able to knock down the pathetic blockade of a fruit cellar. "Signs," though handsomely shot, seems meant for viewers who need to believe in tabloid aliens, and that we can beat them with plainspun, homeland vir tues. It should be called "Sins" for compounding the sins of bad filming. Cast: Mel Gibson, Joaquin Phoenix, Rory Culkin, M. Night Shyamalan, Cherry Jones. Running time: 1 hr., 46 mins. (Elliot t) ★

Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams (PG) — A cheer ful theme park of a comedy about junior spies, with a bigger budget and more inventive fun than the 2001 original (the plot is no advance).

Rober t Rodriguez directed, wrote, helped with the digital ef fects and gizmo touches, including excellent creatures. The many Hispanic rif fs do not land with PC heaviness, and the lively cast includes Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara as the main kids, plus Antonio Banderas, Steve Buscemi, Carla Gugino, Alan Cumming, Bill

Pa x ton, Tony Shalhoub, Danny Trejo, Cheech Marin and (still macho at 81) Ricardo Montalban. Running time: 1 hr., 27 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Star Trek: Nemesis (PG-13) — Politically, the story parallels "The Undiscovered Country," with peace over tures this time coming from the Romulans. Their new leader, Shinzon (Hardy), turns out to be not only human, but a young clone of Captain Picard (Patrick Stewar t). He'd been engineered for nefarious purposes, then abandoned and sent to die on Romulus' sister planet, Remus, Shinzon grows up to lead the Reman species in a successful revolt. Now, he wants only to make peace. Or does he? The film goes on at roughly the rate dilithium crystals melt at room temperature, until the last half-hour, at which point the filmmakers remember that in "Star Trek" there are such things as phasers, photon torpedoes, cloaking devices, warp drives and starships. For our patience, we are rewarded with a prolonged O.K. Corral shootout. Cast: Patrick Stewar t, Jonathan Frakes, Tom Hardy, Marina Sir tis, Brent Spiner, LeVar Bur ton, Michael Dorn, Gates McFadden. Running time: 1 hr., 48 mins. (Salm) ★★1/2 Sweet Home Alabama (PG-13) — Only a year and two weeks af ter New York became our most tormented but inspiring city, it is upstaged by a happy hicksville called Pigeon Creek. Why? Because cute "Mel" (Reese Witherspoon) fled poor-folks marriage to Pigeon Creek sweethear t Jake (Josh Lucas). She is now a light of Manhat tan as fashion designer Melanie Carmichael. And she has the love of politically upward dreamboat Andrew (Patrick Dempsey, son of The Apple's tough but dishy mayor, Candice Bergen). Andy doesn't know that his betrothed is still married to 'Bama boy Jake, who is hur t, haunted and planning his own rise from mediocrity. Mel returns home for a divorce, puts on her corn-pone accent instantly, and rediscovers the joys of Pigeon Creek. Director Andy Tennant serves this corny material with the skill of a machine punching out Alabama license plates. Cast: Reese Witherspoon, Josh Lucas, Patrick Dempsey, Fred Ward, Mary Kay Place, Candice Bergen. Running time: 1 hr., 40 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Treasure Planet (PG) — The movie transmutes Rober t Louis Stevenson's "Treasure Island" into the heavily digitalized animation of a "Star Wars" of fshoot.

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Now Jim is a very American and stalwar t 'toon-teen voiced by Joseph Gordon-Levit t, and Silver (Brian Murray) is a huge cyborg with an old-salt pirate face and tech arms wor thy of the Terminator on a hardware rampage. A space movie that has interstellar craf t with lof ty, luminous sails and crusty barnacles on hulls is so absurd that it's charming. In visual fer tility, "Treasure Planet" rivals the top Japanese animations of recent vintage. For the sub-13 crowd (and many beyond it), this is satisfying holiday enter tainment.

Voices: Joseph Gordon-Levit t, Emma Thompson, Michael Wincot t, Brian Murray, Mar tin Shor t, Laurie Metcalf, Roscoe Lee Browne, Patrick McGoohan.

Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) — Lucy Kelson (Sandra Bullock) is a smar t but stressed at torney whose client, millionaire George Wade (Hugh Grant), is deeply dependent on her. George won’t let her quit until she finds her own replacement – a young lawyer who has her eye on George. George, however, is looking elsewhere: at what just lef t. Cast: Sandra Bullock, Hugh Grant, Alicia Wit t.

The Wild Thornberrys (PG) — Big-screen version of the animated Nickeloden series about a family who travels around the world to make nature documentaries. While in Africa, 12-year-old Eliza learns that she can speak with animals and, with their help, aims to stop a group of poachers. Cast: Lacey Chaber t, Tim Curry, Ruper t Everet t, Flea, Lynn Redgrave, Marisa Tomei.

XXX (PG-13) — Vin Diesel is buf f, which is surely the main point of his playing "edge spor ts" thrill-seeker turned CIA agent Xander Cage, but he has glints of boyish vulnerability. As he grooves into playing the new agent recruited by the agency's top dude (Samuel L. Jackson), the movie finds a rhy thm that is like a more masculine, bulked-up "Barbarella." The plot is junk, about a gang of ex-Red Army crazies led by a satanic Slavic slime (Mar ton Csokas), nihilists eager to destroy the world with a superweapon. It's another movie where you must believe, or giggle. Cast: Vin Diesel, Samuel L. Jackson, Asia Argento, Mar ton Csokas, Danny Trejo. Running time: 1 hr., 44 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ —Capsules compiled from movie reviews written by David Elliott, film critic for The San Diego Union-Tribune and other staff writers.

Automobiles for sale by an individual may be placed in our Free Auto Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for six weeks or until the vehicle sells, whichever comes first. After two weeks, if you want to keep running the same ad, you must call The Metropolitan Spirit by 5 p.m. on Friday or we will assume you sold the vehicle and will delete the ad. There is a $5 reinstatement fee if you forget to renew your ad. All vehicles must indicate price. Free Auto Classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies or dealers.

See Auto Classified for more details. > >

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2003 SEASON

January 19 • 4 pm Stained Glass Windows (Part 1/ Joseph’s side) Solos, anthems and organ works based on the events depicted in the church’s stained glass windows. Free admission.

“Georgia's Oldest Catholic Church” is located at the corner of 8th and Telfair St. in historic Downtown Augusta

722-4944 www.themostholytrinity.org

he first thing you need to know about Warren Schmidt is that he pees sitting down. This is an incredibly telling fact about the selfish, ungrateful, yet sympathetic, American Joe at the heart of Alexander Payne’s brilliant satire, “About Schmidt.”

Delivering what is easily one of the best films of the year, Payne constructs a hilarious ode to Middle America and middle age with this unlikely odyssey, featuring a pathetic, endearing hero who is all too human.

Jack Nicholson stars as Schmidt, an Omaha insurance executive who is stepping down from the top post at his company. A supposedly stand-up guy with a congenial wife (June Squibb) and estranged daughter (Hope Davis), Schmidt is about to enter his golden years. But, as he begins to take stock of his life, he’s overwhelmed by feelings of loss and inadequacy. Domesticated to the point of emasculation by a wife who he managed to live with for decades without really getting to know (she insists he sit to urinate in order to keep the bathroom clean) and spurned by a daughter who resents him, Warren is at a crossroads.

Then, when his wife unexpectedly dies, he sets out alone in the Winnebago they purchased together. With faint goals of seeing the Western part of the country, Schmidt goes to visit his daughter in Denver with the intention of stopping her marriage to a slimy, but well-meaning, salesman (Dermot Mulroney).

Set in Payne’s birthplace, and the locale of his two previous films (“Election” and “Citizen Ruth”), “About Schmidt” takes us on a journey through the mini-malls, fast food joints and endless highways which criss-cross America. A feckless scoundrel who is coming to terms with both his own shortcomings and those of his surroundings, what makes Warren Schmidt such a compelling character is that we understand exactly how he feels.

In the opening scene of the film, Nicholson sits in a barren office staring at the clock, trench coat on, waiting

patiently for the hand to strike five. From there, he heads home to pick up his wife and, after a conversationless car ride, they arrive at an Applebee’s-like steak house, the location of Schmidt’s farewell dinner. It’s a drab, depressing spot, like his office, and as he sits there listening to canned speeches about what a wonderful guy he is, Schmidt’s indignation and desperation sets in. And, while it would seem simple to despise our hero for thinking he’s better than all this, it’s impossible not sympathize and, on some level, agree with him.

From pyramid schemes to Hummels, the paraphernalia that defines Americana is writ large in “About Schmidt.” In one of the most hilarious plot devices in recent memory, Schmidt relays his feelings by writing letters to an African boy he’s sponsoring. In voice-over, Nicholson relates the details of Schmidt’s everyday troubles (his wife’s annoying habits, his daughter’s fiancé, his ungrateful friends) and some of his deep-seated fears, to a 6year-old Tanzinian boy named Ndugu.

The one-way conversations are hilarious and telling, as they point out an essential truth about Schmidt: he means well even in his self-absorption. (It’s horribly funny to hear this Omaha native write about his wife nagging him only to catch himself, realize who is audience is, and add something about how tough it must be to endure poverty and starvation, as well.)

Forced to pour his heart out to a stranger, the communications are also oddly touching and sad, as they uncover a sadness and loneliness that makes Schmidt such a bizarrely compassionate character.

The crowning achievement of Payne’s film is finally the performance from Nicholson, who is exceptional in the lead.

Wiped clean of his signature, devilish grin, the actor invests Schmidt with the perfect balance of wearisome vulgarity and pitiable insolence. Erasing all trace of the grandiose, madcap quality he’s known for, Nicholson has never been better, or more humble, on film, making Warren Schmidt a truly unforgettable nobody.

Cinema: Review

“Just Married” Suffers From a Flat and Uninspired Script By Rachel Deahl

A

h the woes of young newlyweds. Such is the topic of the tepid and disappointing new comedy “Just Married.”

Exploring that thin line between love and hate, this sterile teen flick throws its too young (Brittany Murphy and Ashton Kutcher) stars into a laughless foray chronicling the honeymoon from hell.

Beginning with the end of said honeymoon, the film opens with the return of its two lovebirds. Arriving in Los Angeles from Europe, the bride and groom are, well, physically assaulting each other when we first get a glimpse of them. Shoving and pushing, he ends up tripping her coming off the escalator and she retorts by throwing a wad of gum into his hair. The film then backtracks to expose the evolution of the relationship and reveal where things went wrong.

Tom (Kutcher), an on-air local traffic correspondent, begins the flashback when he starts babbling on his late-night shift about how great things were when he first met Sarah (Murphy). Connecting eyes after he accidentally lobbed a football into her face on the beach, the two immediately fell for each other. And, although her wealthy, snobby family was disapproving of the match from the start, love was in play. So, after a brief domestic stint, the two throw caution to the wind and tie the knot. Then, it’s off on a European tour for the honeymoon. But, before they even land overseas, things get off to a shaky start.

From a failed attempt to join the mile high club on their departing flight (he

gets his foot stuck in the airplane toilet and they end up giving the stewardess a black eye when they try to get out of the stall), to the electrical fire he accidentally causes in their rustic Swiss hotel, the honeymoon quickly turns into a comedy of errors. If only it were funny.

Attempting to capitalize on the rising star power of its leads, “Just Married” suffers from a flat and uninspired script.

The canned plot, which offers no hope of surprise or originality from the offset, isn’t the real problem here; the film’s failing is that the mishaps it presents never become the amusing scenarios that they should. Although both Kutcher and Murphy are given ample opportunity to dazzle with physical comedy, the falling and flopping never amounts to anything memorable. And while both of these young actors have proven they can be amusing and, at times, even funny (Kutcher in his TV series “That ‘70s Show” and Murphy in small roles in films like “Clueless” and “Drop Dead Gorgeous”), “Just Married” doesn’t give either player enough good material to prove themselves.

The real question that “Just Married” leaves you with is whether either of these young actors has what it takes to headline a film. Oddly uncharismatic together, Murphy and Kutcher each have an unusual charm when alone on screen.

Nonetheless, “Just Married” reinforces the feeling that each of these actors is best suited to stick with what they’re doing now: he with television and she with character roles in films.

MOVIE CLOCK REGAL AUGUSTA EXCHANGE 20 Movies Good 1/10 - 1/12 Adaptation (R) Fri-Sat: 1:05, 3:55, 6:55, 9:40, 12:20; Sun: 1:05, 3:55, 6:55, 9:40 Antwone Fisher (PG-13) 1:20, 4:15, 7:05, 10:00 Just Married (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:20, 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:45, 12:10; Sun: 12:20, 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:45 NARC (R) 11:55, 2:35, 5:10, 7:45, 10:20 Kangaroo Jack (PG) Sat: 7:30; Sun: 3:00 Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) 1:10, 1:30, 4:10, 4:30, 7:10, 7:30, 10:10, 10:30 Pinocchio (G) 1:15, 3:50 About Schmidt (R) Fri-Sat: 1:00, 3:55, 6:50, 9:45, 12:35; Sun: 1:00, 3:55, 6:50, 9:45 Friday After Nex t (R) 8:05, 10:20, 12:25 Gangs of New York (R) 12:15, 3:45, 7:40, 9:10 The Wild Thornberrys (PG) 12:40, 2:40, 4:45, 7:00 Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) Fri: 1:50, 2:15, 4:20, 4:50, 7:20, 7:50, 9:50, 10:25, 12:20; Sat: 1:50, 2:15, 4:20, 4:50, 7:20, 9:50, 12:20; Sun: 1:50, 4:20, 7:20, 7:50, 9:50, 10:25 Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:00, 2:00, 4:00, 7:00, 8:00, 11:00, 11:45; Sun: 12:00, 2:00, 4:00, 7:00, 8:00, 11:00 The Hot Chick (PG-13) 12:10, 3:00, 5:25, 8:15, 10:40 Maid in Manhattan (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:05, 2:35, 5:15, 7:40, 10:05, 12:30; Sun: 12:05, 2:35, 5:15, 7:40, 10:05 Drumline (PG-13) 1:35, 2:05, 4:25, 4:55, 7:30, 8:00, 10:15, 10:45 Star Trek: Nemesis (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 7:15, 9:35, 12:00; Sun: 7:15, 9:35 Die Another Day (PG-13) 1:55, 4:55, 7:55, 10:55 Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (PG) 12:30, 4:05 EVANS 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 1/10 - 1/16 Just Married (PG-13) Fri: 3:45, 5:45, 7:45, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 1:45, 3:45, 5:45, 7:45, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 5:45, 7:45, 9:45 Real Women Have Curves (PG-13) Fri: 3:25, 5:25, 7:25, 9:25; Sat-Sun: 1:25, 3:25, 5:25, 7:25, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 5:25, 7:25, 9:25 Kangaroo Jack (PG) Sat: 7:30; Sun: 3:00 Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) Fri: 2:10, 4:00, 5:10, 7:00, 8:10, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 1:05, 2:10, 4:00, 5:10, 7:00, 8:10, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 4:00, 5:10, 7:00, 8:10, 9:45 Gangs of New York (R) Fri: 4:20, 8:30; SatSun: 12:55, 4:20, 8:30; Mon-Thur: 4:20, 8:30 The Wild Thornberrys (PG) Fri: 3:15, 5:15; Sat-Sun: 1:15, 3:15, 5:15; Mon-Thur: 5:15

Drumline (PG-13) 7:30, 9:50 The Hot Chick (PG-13) 7:35, 9:55 Star Trek: Nemesis (PG-13) Fri: 4:50, 7:10, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:50, 4:50, 7:10, 9:35; MonThur: 4:50, 7:10, 9:35 Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG-13) Fri: 4:40, 8:20; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 4:40, 8:20; Mon-Thur: 4:40, 8:20 Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) Fri: 4:10, 7:05, 9:15; Sat-Sun: 1:10, 4:10, 7:05, 9:15; MonThur: 4:10, 7:05, 9:15 Maid in Manhattan (PG-13) Fri-Sun: 2:20, 4:30, 7:20, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 4:30, 7:20, 9:40 Treasure Planet (PG) Fri: 3:35, 5:35; SatSun: 1:35, 3:35, 5:35; Mon-Thur: 5:35 Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (PG) Fri: 5:00, 8:00; Sat: 1:00, 4:00; SunThur: 5:00, 8:00 MASTERS 7 CINEMAS Movies Good 1/10 - 1/16 Just Married (PG-13) Fri: 5:15, 7:15, 9:15; Sat-Sun: 1:15, 3:15, 5:15, 7:15, 9:15; MonThur: 5:15, 7:15, 9:15 Antwone Fisher (PG-13) Fri: 4:00, 7:00, 9:30; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 4:00, 7:00, 9:30; MonThur: 4:00, 7:00, 9:30 Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) Fri: 4:10, 7:05, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 1:10, 4:10, 7:05, 9:45; MonThur: 4:10, 7:05, 9:45 Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG-13) Fri: 4:40, 8:20; Sat-Sun: 1:05, 4:40, 8:20; Mon-Thur: 4:40, 8:20 Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) Fri: 4:25, 7:25, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:25, 4:25, 7:25, 9:35; MonThur: 4:25, 7:25, 9:35 Maid in Manhattan (PG-13) Fri: 4:20, 7:20, 9:40; Sat-Sun: 1:20, 4:20, 7:20, 9:40; MonThur: 4:20, 7:20, 9:40 Drumline (PG-13) Fri: 4:05, 7:10, 9:25; SatSun: 1:30, 4:05, 7:10, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 4:05, 7:10, 9:25 REGAL 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 1/10 - 1/16 Santa Clause 2 (G) 2:15, 4:35, 7:00, 9:30 I Spy (PG-13) 2:05, 4:30, 7:10, 9:35 Tuck Everlasting (PG) 2:30, 5:15, 7:45, 9:40 Ex treme Ops (PG-13) 7:40, 9:30 The Emperor’s Club (PG-13) 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:40 Ghost Ship (R) 2:35, 4:50, 7:30, 10:05 Jonah: A Veggie Tales Movie (G) 2:45, 5:10 Sweet Home Alabama (PG-13) 2:10, 4:40, 7:15, 9:50 Brown Sugar (PG-13) 1:55, 4:25, 7:05, 9:45 Barbershop (PG-13) 2:20, 5:05, 7:50, 10:00 Spy Kids 2 (PG) 2:00, 4:25, 7:35, 9:55 Signs (PG-13) 2:00, 4:45, 7:00, 9:25 XXX (PG-13) 2:25, 4:55, 7:20, 9:50

Movie listings are subject to change without notice.

29 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

30 M E T R O S P I R I T

Music

J A N 9 2 0 0 3

New Year’s Eve a Silent Night on Some Fronts

I

t’s the same every year – a crowd gathers in Times Square to watch the ball drop, Dick Clark dusts off the ol’ microphone, couples kiss at the stroke of midnight.

So what did you do this year?

If you were one of those who opted to spend the last few hours of the year at home, it’s not because there was a lack of activity in Augusta on the last night of 2002. Though downtown didn’t host a New Year’s Eve event, Augusta’s merchants stepped up to the plate, offering everything from midnight champagne toasts at popular nightclubs to overnight packages at area hotels.

But an informal poll in the late afternoon of Dec. 31 revealed that quite a few Augustans had a silent night planned – or had failed to make plans at all.

“It wasn’t a special night. It was a decent night,” said Scott Levine, owner of Crossroads and the Playground.

“Compared to last year, it was about 50 percent of what it was last year.”

Even so, the crowds at both clubs were comparable to a good weekend night, Levine said. “It was fine – it was just not what you expected for New Year’s, compared to the people from last year.”

Down the street at the Soul Bar and Modjeska, both clubs reported a good turnout. “New Year’s Eve at the Soul Bar was great,” said owner Coco Rubio.

“I knew that people would come out, especially because we charged only $5 for couples. Lots of friends and regulars made it out, and by 11 p.m. there was a good crowd at the Soul Bar, comparable to a busy Friday night.”

Jody Smith of Modjeska reported a similar scenario. “We had a much bigger turnout than we expected,” he said.

“It was a huge success by all measures.

New Year’s was much bigger than a normal Friday or Saturday night for us. We staffed the place like a normal weekend night, when we should have had many more people working.”

Modjeska attracted crowds with a mix of live music and a DJ, while Rubio opted to spin disco, salsa and ‘80s music and Levine booked live acts 420 Outback, The Big Mighty and Juice.

“They’re good bands and have a fol-

Ten!

BY LISA JORDAN

Nine!

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ONE! lowing that they brought in,” said Levine. “But as far as capturing the general public, I don’t think they were out in force this year as compared to last year.”

When asked if he thought the Soul Bar’s musical variety contributed to the club’s New Year’s Eve success, Rubio replied, “Oh, yeah. It’s all about keeping the price down and mixing up the music as much as possible. I think this is why we had such a good New Year’s Eve.” And while the Soul Bar’s New Year’s

Eve bash wouldn’t set you back much more than a regular Friday or Saturday night cover charge, many of the city’s New Year’s Eve celebrations included extras reflected in higher ticket prices.

Admission to the Playground’s party was $10 and admission to Crossroads that night was $12. On a typical weekend, cover charges at the two clubs run between $3 and $5, depending on the band. “But you don’t get the amenities that you get on New Year’s,” Levine pointed out. “We offered a free buffet,

champagne toast, balloon drop which had cash and prizes, party favors, hats and noisemakers and so forth.”

When The Spirit asked Levine why he thought this year’s crowds were smaller than in previous years, he replied, “I have no idea. People have told me that there were roadblocks and things out.”

But, he said, there’s a simple solution to avoid the dangers of drinking and driving – free cab services offered to bar patrons over the holidays.

“Budweiser and Radio Cab offer a wonderful service during the holidays,” said Levine. “All you had to do was give them your car keys and they’ll take you home.” The service was also advertised at local bars and in use two weeks in advance of the holiday.

Another reason Levine suggested crowds were down is the country’s lagging economy, a theory corroborated by Associated Press reports of cutbacks in New Year’s Eve celebrations all across the country; many cities, like Mobile, Ala., and Brunswick, Ga., opted to forgo New Year’s Eve traditions this year in order to alleviate the strain on city budgets.

One more factor that contributed to smaller crowds, again according to Associated Press reports, was bad weather. Though Augusta didn’t receive heavy fog or snow, New Year’s Eve in Augusta alternated between cloudy and rainy.

But weather wasn’t a problem in the New Year’s Eve capital of the world, New York City’s Times Square. The crowd was estimated at a healthy 750,000. Concerns about terrorism prompted city officials to weld manhole covers shut, remove mailboxes and position thousands of undercover and sharpshooter police officers throughout the crowd.

No doubt local bar and club owners are hoping that next year’s Dec. 31 crowds will surpass 2002’s, whether they counted this year’s numbers as a success or not. Modjeska’s definitely looking that far ahead. Said Smith, “We anticipate next year to be even bigger and better, and we’ll definitely be ready for the masses.”

31

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*Items for sale by an individual may be placed in our Guaranteed Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for ten weeks or until the item sells, whichever comes first. You must call by 5PM on Friday every two weeks to renew the ad or The Metropolitan Spirit will assume the item has been sold and will delete the ad. There is a $5 reinstatement fee if you forget to renew your ad. All items must indicate price. Guaranteed classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies. Guaranteed Classified ads do not include any automotive vehicles, real estate or pets.

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M E T R O S P I R I T J A N

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2 4 6 B O B B Y J O N E S E X P R E S S WAY • 8 6 8 - 1 5 0 8

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he suits in the music biz are still reeling with the recent news that CD sales are down over 10 percent from last year. Of course, free online downloading may be the main culprit in this case, but what about the quality of the current product?

Let’s keep it simple. Is “new” music lacking in comparison to times past or is it that today’s radio playlists are so conservative that many deserving artists just aren’t being heard?

Are the major labels to blame with their primary emphasis on hip-hop oriented acts that alienate many over the ripe age of 30?

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What about CD prices? There is no reason why new discs (and especially reissued ones) should sport list prices of almost $20. Even when they’re discounted down to a “low” $13 or thereabouts, the cost of CDs is just too damn high. When JOHN MAYER’S terrific “Music for Squares” was first issued, you could pick it up most everywhere for under $10. Now that the album is a hit, the disc now can be yours for, yep, right around $13. It’s an inane and archaic pricing structure that is rightfully causing a panic at Sony, Capitol and Warner Bros. Good. Maybe it’s time for a little reinvention in da music biz.

enough to make you miss “Hard Copy.”

Black Magic Woman Dept.

One of the stranger stories of 2002 concerned CARLOS SANTANA and his recent hit “The Game of Love” collaboration with MICHELLE BRANCH. Santana told the press in October that the song “was made in the inner world with the inner invisible ones like angels and archangels.” All cynicism aside, it’s a great record and a perfect match between singer and guitarist, but don’t be surprised that the supernatural one likes the singer.

After all, the lovely Ms. Branch did name her 2001 release “The Spirit Room.”

TOAD THE WET SPROCKET has officially reformed and is hitting the road next month.

The group, who first called it quits five years ago, splashed down hard in the ‘90s with albums such as “Fear” and “Dulcinea.” Hit singles like “Walk on the Ocean” and “All I Want” made the group one of the better acts of the decade. You can catch the group (named after a MONTY PYTHON skit) in Atlanta March 7 at the Cotton Club. A new album is in the works.

Turner’s Rock and Roll Jeopardy: A. These were the two most aired songs on radio in 2002.

Q. What were “How You Remind Me” by Nickelback and “Blurry” from Puddle of Mudd?

MICHELLE BRANCH

“Stop ... in the Name of the Law” Dept.

Don’t you just love it when rich stars try to circumvent the law when they get in trouble?

Take DIANA ROSS and her recent DUI arrest in Tucson, Ariz. The drunken diva was pulled over by cops who observed the singer merely driving the wrong way down an East Tucson street. She was charged with “extreme DUI” with a blood alcohol content of 0.20 percent, more than twice the state’s legal limit of 0.08.

A judge has blocked the release of her “newest” video, which shows the entertainer’s crime and arrest. A permanent injunction is being sought by Ross’ attorney. It’s almost

BY

ED TURNER Visit us online. For all the latest in Arts, Entertainment and Local Events. Visit our website at metspirit.com.

NIGHT LIFE

33 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9

Thursday, 9th The Bee’s Knees - Floating Point 6 Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford Club Argos - Karaoke Par ty Continuum - Playa*Listic Thursday Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Eagle’s Nest - Karaoke with DJ MJ Fox’s Lair - Karaoke Garden City Bar and Grill - Karaoke with Mad Dog Mike Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Ruskin Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Kosmic Karma with Three Six ty Playground - Open Mic Night The Shack - DJ Billy Soul Bar - Tur tleneck, Gearbox Time Piecez - DJ Dance Par ty Whiskey Junction - DJ Chaos Whiskey Road Oyster Factory - Dave Freeman

Friday, 10th The Bee’s Knees - Jazz Sessions Blind Pig - Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford Club Argos - Talent Show Coconuts - DJs Doug and Eric Continuum - Jucifer, Exit 86 Cotton Patch - Bamboo Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - Columbia Music Showcase featuring Scenic Drive, Pain in Life, Enable Kain D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Durango’s - Heavy Dose Five Pines Saloon - The Hard Times Band Fox’s Lair - Roger Enevoldsen Garden City Bar and Grill - Karaoke Greene Streets - Karaoke Hangnail Gallery - Gearbox, Cycle Honk y Tonk - Danny Rhea and the Empty Pockets Joe’s Underground - Sabo and the Scorchers Last Call - Tony Howard, DJ Richie Rich Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock The Shack - DJ Buckwheat Soul Bar - ‘80s Night Whiskey Junction - Brent Lundy Band, DJ Paul

Saturday, 11th The Bee’s Knees - Sweet Nuthin’ Saturdays Blind Pig - Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford Club Argos - Argos Cabaret with Special Guest Coconuts - DJs Doug and Eric Cotton Patch - Bamboo Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - The Big Mighty, Redbelly, Par tTime Heroes D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express

Durango’s - Heavy Dose Five Pines Saloon - The Hard Times Band Fox’s Lair - Roger Enevoldsen Garden City Bar and Grill - Karaoke with Mad Dog Mike Greene Streets - Karaoke Honk y Tonk - Danny Rhea and the Empty Pockets Joe’s Underground - Impulse Ride, Loser Jim’s 40th Bir thday Celebration Last Call - Tony Howard, DJ Richie Rich Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock The Shack - DJ Buckwheat Soul Bar - Kevn Kinney, David Barbe, Bain Mat tox Whiskey Junction - Brent Lundy Band Whiskey Road Oyster Factory - John Durham

2 0 0 3

Sunday, 12th Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford and The Last Bohemian Quar tet The Shack - Karaoke with Buckwheat and Doober Somewhere in Augusta - John Kolbeck Whiskey Junction - Karaoke by Tom

Monday, 13th Continuum - Monday Madness with Perry Anderson Crossroads - Dance Par ty with DJ Chris Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Keith “Fossill” Gregory The Shack - DJ Billy

Tuesday, 14th Adams Nightclub - Karaoke with Bill Tolber t The Bee’s Knees - Comin’ Round the Bend D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Metro Coffeehouse - Irish Music Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock The Shack - DJ Billy

Wednesday, 15th The Bee’s Knees - Blue in Green Continuum - Open Mic Night Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - The Family Trucksters D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Ruskin Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Theology on Tap: Mar y, Mar y Quite Contrar y Playground - Karaoke with Dave Long Red Lion - Billarabi The Shack - DJ Billy Somewhere in Augusta - Patrick Blanchard Soul Bar - Live Jazz

Jucifer makes the trek to Club Continuum Jan. 10. Exit 86 opens.

Upcoming Shirley Q. Liquor - Club Argos - Jan. 25 Jerry Halliday - Club Argos - Feb. 15

Elsewhere Joe Nichols - Cowboys Atlanta, Kennesaw, Ga. Jan. 10 The Zen Tricksters - Shakedown Street, Car tersville, Ga. - Jan. 10; Jake’s Roadhouse, Decatur, Ga. - Jan. 11; Cumberland’s Pub, Charleston, S.C. - Jan. 15; Senate Park, Columbia, S.C. - Jan. 16 George Strait - Bi-Lo Center, Greenville, S.C. Jan. 16 Plain White T’s - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 16 2003 Holy Hip Hop Showcase - Ear thlink Live, Atlanta - Jan. 17 DJ Spook y - Echo Lounge, Atlanta - Jan. 17 Phil Vassar - Cowboys Atlanta, Kennesaw, Ga. Jan. 17

Da Vinci’s Notebook - Red Light Cafe, Atlanta Jan. 17 Saliva - Tremont Music Hall, Charlot te, N.C. Jan. 18 Dave Alvin & the Guilty Men - The Handlebar, Greenville, S.C. - Jan. 18 Hair Care Atlanta - Nine Lives, Atlanta - Jan. 18 Pink Floyd Laser Spectacular - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - Jan. 18 Countdown Quartet - Echo Lounge, Atlanta Jan. 18 Leftover Salmon - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta Jan. 18 Antibalas Afrobeat Orchestra - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 19 Trapt - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 23 Coldplay - BJCC Concer t Hall, Birmingham, Ala. - Jan 24; Grady Cole Center, Charlot te, N.C. Jan. 25

continued on page 34

34 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

(Left) Yes, they really are in a supermarket – and yes, you do know them. Turtleneck, featuring members of Neato Torpedo and Deathstar, makes its debut Jan. 9 at the Soul Bar. (Right )This week, Gearbox is twice as nice – catch them Thursday with Turtleneck and Friday at the Hangnail Gallery. continued from page 33 moe. - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - Jan. 24-25 Honda Battle of the Bands - Georgia Dome, Atlanta - Jan. 25 Ferron - Red Light Cafe, Atlanta - Jan. 25 Richard Bickness and the Shameless Lovers Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Jan. 25 The Pretenders - The Tabernacle, Atlanta Jan. 27 Finch - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 28 Mad Margritt - The Maple Street Mansion, Atlanta - Jan. 30 Todd Rundgren - Rox y Theatre, Atlanta Jan. 31 Mac McAnally - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta Jan. 31

Avail - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 31 Jorma Kaukonen - Variety Playhouse - Feb. 1 Jimmy Buffett - Philips Arena, Atlanta - Feb. 1; The Carolina Center, Columbia, S.C. - Feb. 5 Lyricist Lounge - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Feb. 2 David Gray - Fox Theatre, Atlanta - Feb. 4 Big Head Todd and the Monsters - Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - Feb. 5 Swinging Medallions - Cowboys Atlanta, Kennesaw, Ga. - Feb. 7 Dave Matthews Cover Band - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Feb. 8 Papa Roach - Eleven50 Club, Atlanta - Feb. 12 Bon Jovi, The Goo Goo Dolls - Philips Arena, Atlanta - Feb. 13 Henry Rollins Spoken Word - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Feb. 13

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Marvin Sease - Macon City Auditorium, Macon, Ga. - Feb. 14 Juliana Theory - Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - Feb. 18 Mission of Burma - Echo Lounge, Atlanta Feb. 20 Dirty Dozen Brass Band - Cot ton Club, Atlanta Feb. 21 Gary Allan - Cowboys Atlanta, Kennesaw, Ga. Feb. 21 Susan Tedeschi - Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - Feb. 22 Steve Earle - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Feb. 22 Engelbert Humperdinck - Gaillard Auditorium, Charleston, S.C. - Feb. 26 Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band - The Arena at Gwinnet t Center, Duluth, Ga. - Feb. 28 Bill Gaither and Friends - Charlot te Coliseum, Charlot te, N.C. - March 7

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The Smiling Assassins - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - March 8 Les Nubians - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - March 8 Grenadier Guards - Fox Theatre, Atlanta - March 9 Yanni - Philips Arena, Atlanta - March 11 Many tickets are available through TicketMaster outlets, by calling 828-7700, or online at w w w.ticketmaster.com. Tickets may also be available through Tix Online by calling 278-4TIX or online at w w w.tixonline.com. Night Life listings are subject to change without notice.

Deadline for inclusion in Night Life calendar is Tuesday at 4 p.m. Contact Rhonda Jones or Lisa Jordan by calling 738-1142, fa xing 736-0443 or e-mailing to rhonda_jones@metspirit.com or lisa_jordan@metspirit.com.

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cheating, but which was not counted on his GPA, was in religion.)

is Own “Head Start” Program: A 7-year-old Minneapolis boy stole an SUV on Dec. 6 and crashed into several things, and then, after attempts by the police and his guardian to explain to him why stealing cars was wrong, he stole another one on Dec. 17 and hit another vehicle, injuring a boy riding with his mother. His two reported explanations were, respectively: “I want to be a good driver when I grow up,” and “I just had to get to school and I don’t know where it is.”

(According to a hopeful Minneapolis Star Tribune report, experts believe that kids that young who commit crimes are no more than two to three times more likely to turn into violent criminals.)

• In a December New York Times dispatch from Jidda, Saudi Arabia, concerning the heavily religious-law-regulated Perdu lingerie shop, its female marketing director said that about 85 percent of Saudi women wear ill-fitting bras, perhaps because the law requires that sales clerks in public stores be men. According to the Times, “(W)hile women may be berated for showing a ... leg or an arm (in public), they must ask strange men for help in assessing their bra size.”

What Goes Around, Comes Around • Following a Detroit Free Press interview in November with bulk e-mailer Alan Ralsky (who gloated that his success at sending “spam” advertising had paid for his $740,000 home), Internet spam-haters tracked down Ralsky’s West Bloomfield, Mich., address and inundated him with thousands of unsolicited hardcopy catalogs and mailings. In another case, following news that the Pentagon had hired former Reagan administration official John Poindexter to oversee the creation of software that could track nearly all consumer transactions in the country, an SF Weekly (San Francisco) columnist released Poindexter’s home phone number, and Internet activists set up a Web site for tracking all of Poindexter’s personal transactions.

• Jay Glaspey, 37, was hospitalized in Des Moines, Iowa, in September after accidentally setting himself on fire while trying to burn his girlfriend’s bed after a fight. And Cordell T. Holland, 24, was hospitalized in Prince George’s County, Md., in July after accidentally setting himself on fire while trying to burn up his car for the insurance. And Timothy Grubb, 46, was hospitalized in Cleveland in October after accidentally setting himself on fire while trying to burn down his ex-girlfriend’s house.

• In Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, in October, David Voth, author of a best seller on how to keep from paying income tax in Canada, was fined for his failure to file income tax returns since 1995. And Robert H. Morrison, author of “Divorce Dirty Tricks” (on how to avoid child-support payments), pleaded guilty in Phoenix in December to avoiding support payments on his 12-year-old son.

Readers’ Choice • In December, police in Urbana, Ohio, said they would soon file fraud charges against Teresa Milbrandt, 35, for tricking local people and businesses into giving her more than $10,000 on behalf of her 7-yearold daughter, who she falsely said had leukemia. Milbrandt apparently never even told her daughter why she had to have her head shaved (to simulate the effects of chemotherapy), but that touch of realism ultimately caused the scheme to collapse when someone noticed the hair had been cut and was not falling out.

People Different From Us • In November, Jason Morris, 30, was acquitted by a jury in Greater Manchester, England, of the charge that, using ordinary pliers, he pulled out 18 of his girlfriend’s teeth, leaving her covered head to toe in blood. The case turned when the girlfriend, Samantha Court, 25, took the witness stand and admitted that she pulled the teeth out herself, during an April drug binge during which she tried to get rid of a green and pink fly that had darted down her throat.

Court said the couple has decided to stop doing drugs.

Ironies • Two men who have sat on juries in notoriously litigation-friendly Jefferson County, Miss., filed a lawsuit against the TV program “60 Minutes” in December, claiming that they were defamed in a segment about Mississippi juries’ generosity. Anthony Berry was on a jury that gave out $150 million in an asbestos case, and Johnny Anderson was on one that awarded $150 million in a diet drug case, and both say the “60 Minutes” segment made the juries seem so extravagant that they must be getting kickbacks. The two men’s lawsuit (filed in Jefferson County, of course) asks for more than $6 billion.

• The president of Baptist-affiliated Gardner-Webb University (Boiling Springs, N.C.) admitted in September that he raised a star basketball player’s grade-point average so that he would be eligible to play in the 2000-2001 season, during which GardnerWebb won the National Christian College Athletic Association championship. (The president, Christopher White, resigned in October; the class that the player failed, for

Updates on Recent News of the Weird Stories

of the

Weird H

• In November 2001, News of the Weird reported on a language its practitioners called The Truth (but which is basically indistinguishable from gibberish), which at that time a few Canadian defendants were using in tax-evasion trials (with a huge lack of success). In December 2002, Janet Kay Logan, 46, and Jason Zellmer, 22, were convicted in Madison, Wis., of creating phony lawsuit documents, despite their using The Truth in their trial and attempting to call as a witness the language’s creator, David Wynn Miller, also known as the “king of Hawaii,” who informed the judge that the genesis of The Truth was when Miller “turned Hawaii into a verb” and showed “how a preposition is needed to certify a noun.” Logan insisted until the very end that the lawsuits were legitimate because she is a judge in the “DI-STRICT court of the Unity State of the World.”

— Chuck Shepherd © United Press Syndicate

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35 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9

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2 0 0 3

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

I predict that after Castro dies in 2003, Cuba will become both a haven for American corporations seeking cheap labor and a more exotic version of Nevada, complete with legalized gambling and prostitution. Booming tourist trade from its northern neighbor will ultimately turn the island nation into a wealthy “paradise of vice.” I also suspect that these developments may have analogies to your destiny in 2003. You’re likely to be angling for your own personal Cuba: a new frontier to try out your dreams of expansion; a free zone where you can be more daring and experimental than usual.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

Jack prays every day for five years to win the lottery, but never hears from God or hits the jackpot.

Finally, God wakes him up in the middle of the night. “Jack, is that you who’s been praying so hard to win the lottery?” the Supreme Being booms.

“Yes, Lord, desperately!” God pauses for a moment, then says thoughtfully, “Jack, I’ll tell you what. I want you to meet me halfway. Buy a ticket, OK?” Let this joke be a prod, Taurus, that will keep you from making the same mistake Jack was guilty of.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

I have a psychic vision about your life in 2003. I see you adopting a secret identity as a superhero. Your mythic name will be The Amazing Underdog, and you will have two superpowers: the ability to steal unexpected victories in situations where everyone underestimates you, and the ability to defeat evil and save the world through modest, persistent effort done with absolute integrity. Are you up for the assignment? If so, don’t tell anyone about it.

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

Upon completing “The Book of Ephraim,” Pulitzer Prize-winning poet James Merrill believed he’d finished writing about the rejuvenation of his spiritual life, which had been unfolding for several years.

But he was wrong. When he and a friend picked up

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the Ouija board soon thereafter, Merrill was given notice that he had more to do. “3 OF YOUR YEARES MORE WE WANT,” barked the Ouija spirits, who apparently dwelt in a realm with odd spelling rules and no lowercase. “WE MUST HAVE / POEMS OF SCIENCE THE WEORK FINISHT IS BUT A PROLOGUE.” If you consulted the Ouija board right now, Cancerian, I bet you’d channel a comparable message concerning your own path. Here’s my prediction: A labor of love you expected to climax soon will ask you — perhaps even command you — to give it more time.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

In the future, it won’t be the material treasures you accumulate that will win you the most bragging points. It won’t be the important people you know or the deals you’ve swung or the knowledge you’ve amassed or your mate’s attractiveness. No, what will be most boast-worthy in the world to come will be your success in wrestling your shadow — how thoroughly you can tame the ignorant, flawed, selfish aspects of your own nature. Each of us is given an equal share of that leaden stuff, but some are more relentlessly ingenious in transmuting it into gold. And it’s now prime time for you, Leo, to make rapid progress towards mastering that powerful magic.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

“Who am I? Where did I come from? Where am I going?” Philosophers long ago stopped trying to solve these questions, says biologist E.O. Wilson, believing them to be unanswerable. Scientists subsequently stepped forward to fill the vacuum and now act as supreme arbiters of the mysteries that once belonged to philosophers. I regard this as a loss. Though the scientific method is a tremendous tool for understanding the world, many scientists refuse to use it to study phenomena that can’t be repeated under controlled conditions or that can’t be explained by current models of reality. And I say it’s impossible to explore the big three questions

New York Times Crossword Puzzle

36

without taking into account all that stuff. Which brings me to the crux, Virgo: Your assignment in 2003 is to bring the disciplined objectivity of the scientific method into areas of your life that are invisible, subtle, secret, and soulful.

in 2003 to set aside certain long-held opinions or traditions in order to be available for new financial opportunities. It’s not my job to tell you whether it’s right or wrong for you to do that; I just want you to be fully prepared for the choice you’ll be facing.

In the coming week, steep yourself in the sounds of gossamer melodies as much as possible, preferably while bathing in soft, golden light and sipping hot, sweet tea. Move and think and read slowly in the safest places you know while exulting quietly in the soothing touch of velvet or cashmere next to your skin. In February you can careen wildly out to the edges of reality, bedecked in vivid accessories and on the prowl for delightful upheavals; but for now devote yourself to the cultivation of luminous, murmuring pleasures that comfort you all the way down to the bottom of your life.

I’ve been having dreams about rock star Eminem.

In one, my mom beat Eminem’s mom at armwrestling. In another, he took me to the house in Detroit where he lived as a child, which happened to be next door to where I grew up. In a third, Eminem and I collaborated on a music CD that was loved by the critics but shunned by consumers.

What do these dreams mean? Since Eminem is the celebrity whose influence I regard as the most contrary to mine, my unconscious mind may be suggesting that I should deal more proactively with those I disagree with. Or maybe I’m being shown that my adversaries and I have similarities that I’ve been unwilling to acknowledge. I bring this up, Aquarius, because my analysis of 2003’s omens reveals that you, too, should identify the person who is most unlike you in the world — your Eminem — and ask the same questions I am.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

I predict that in 2003, researchers will use genetic engineering to develop high-yield soy and corn crops that thrive on toxic sludge and acid rain. I further predict that many of you Scorpios will produce analogous marvels in your personal lives.

Some of you will exploit your old psychic garbage to create barriers that’ll prevent the influx of more psychic garbage in the future; some of you will be driven by your nightmares to generate bright blessings; and some of you will turn your most acute pain into your hottest inspiration.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

I N A B A D F A W I D A T O Y

I D A H O

T A M E R

T A T E R

A B O R T

L L O E X F A T I I R E N Y N V I D Q A L U N L I A A T M I A D S O

O F T E N

U L N A S

N E D

H Y N A A T P T

T E A R O R

You Can Call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your Expanded Weekly Horoscope

I predict that marijuana will eventually be legalized for no other reason than that the government needs the money gained from taxing and selling it in staterun stores. Similarly, you Capricorns will be tempted

11- & 27-Down 39 Active 40 “Cantar de Mio ___” (Spanish epic poem) 41 Water pit 42 Crusty entree 44 Most eager 46 Arrange in tiers 47 Prehistoric: Abbr.

48 Miss Brooks player 51 Closet supply 54 The Bahamas’ ___ Island 58 “Thimble Theatre” seadweller 59 Survey [right only] 61 U.R.L. ending

M A C R O

At a recent workshop, facilitator James Baraz told the following story. A woman came to a Buddhist teacher seeking advice about a certain problem. The teacher made a wise recommendation, but the woman objected that she couldn’t follow it because of another problem she had. The teacher offered a second solution, which the woman also rejected, saying it would be impossible to carry out because of yet another difficulty. Once more the teacher described a course of action she could take to minimize the original dilemma, and the woman named yet another problem that would prevent her from implementing it. Finally the teacher ended the conversation, saying, “When your intention to change is greater than your intention to stay the same, then you will change.”

— © Rob Brezsny

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE S C I F I

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

I predict that beginning next summer, many films that are released on DVD will be offered with three different possible endings. Consumers will be able to choose the climax that appeals to them most.

This new wrinkle in the entertainment industry will have a parallel in the actual lives of Sagittarians in 2003. I predict that you will come to a crossroads at the tail end of a big adventure, and there you will take a long pause as you decide which way to go in order to complete your journey. Many of you will then try out all three possible endings before committing to one.

ACROSS 36 Castor’s slayer 62 Webster’s shelfmate 1 Norway’s patron 37 Two of these are saint needed to type 63 Brig prisoner, perhaps every answer 5 Racket here except 17- 64 Match 11 Prehistoric & 59-Across and accumulation: 14 It obtains

oxygen from water 15 Product of ewe’s milk 16 ___ mater 17 Some federal government income [left only] 19 Golfer Woosnam 20 “Louis the Fat” and others 21 Pea or bean 23 Candle holders?

24 Poor 25 Star in astronomy 28 Beefed 32 Tank top 34 Poke 35 “One-horse open sleigh” follower

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

T I M P E D A R L E B A Y L I T T T E R A C B R A I R E O U R T T U R A N O S S T

A B A C I

T E X A N

S M A S H I N T O

E T A N R T O C E A N

A X I N G

P E R S E

Abbr.

65 Brown ermines 66 Last call?

DOWN 1 Double curve 2 Topic in speech therapy 3 Some choir members 4 Vagabonds’ transportation, maybe 5 It’s wadable 6 Lenya of “Cabaret” 7 Stockpile 8 Credit card concern 9 Scott Turow’s first book 10 Future rambler, say 11 Drug source [right only] 12 He played Oskar in “Schindler’s List” 13 Öre spender 18 Lord’s worker 22 Unpleasant thing to step on 25 22-Down unit 26 War hero Murphy 27 Supermarket stock [left only] 28 Soul searcher?

29 Filer 30 Chill-inducing

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Puzzle by Patrick Merrell

31 Kenmore

product 33 Conclusion starter 34 Econ. figure 38 Qt. or pt.

39 Keep one’s hand 41 Zones 43 Fake fat

45 Las Cruces-to-

Santa Fe dir.

48 Snorer’s problem, maybe 49 1989 Grammy winner for “Nick of Time” 50 Waste matter 51 Industrial arts class

52 1988

presidential hopeful 53 Detect 55 Waterloo’s place 56 Hogwash 57 Corner pieces 60 Neil Sedaka’s “___ Ape”

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.20 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554.

Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. Online subscriptions: Today's puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/diversions ($19.95 a year).

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ast year, my boyfriend moved from 300 miles away to live with me. We’ve been together for three years, and I absolutely adore him. Recently, he started a new job, and he acts like he wants me to have nothing to do with his work world. I’ve found some suspicious things, including a page in his notebook with some coworker’s name written all over it in big bubble letters. When I confronted him, he said he was just doodling; he barely speaks to this girl. She’s no threat looks-wise, but I’m still concerned. He goes out after work with his coworkers, and never invites me along. He’s pushing me to go out with my girlfriends more than ever.

Also, our sex life has become almost nonexistent. If I ask him about this stuff, he gets angry and defensive. I know this man loves me, and I can’t imagine he would have uprooted his whole life if he were just going to cheat on me ... would he?

—Bubble In Paradise Doodling somebody’s name in big bubble letters in one’s notebook is totally normal behavior — for a girl in seventh grade with a thousandpound crush on Justin Timberlake. The nex t thing you know, your boyfriend will be decorating his power drill with sparkly stickers and stashing Hello Kit ty mini-pads in his wallet. His regression is, indeed, cause for concern, as it could indicate the presence of an ‘N Sync-playing tumor pressing on his brain. Chances are, however, that a brain scan will reveal only a girlfriend pressing on his freedom.

Ideally, the guidelines for successful togetherness follow the guidelines for successful cologne application: spritzing on just enough to say, “I washed recently,” as opposed to “Gas the populace.” The goal, obviously, is get ting people thinking sensual thoughts about you, not fantasizing about hosing you down.

When applying yourself to a relationship, you should lean more toward simulating unrequited love than personifying soapy buildup. The goal, obviously, is making the person long for you, not making them long to ex foliate you. Please note: Somebody longs for you when you’re stranded in the Baltics, not when you’re of f on a rare trip alone to the corner 7-11.

This brings us to what’s missing from your relationship; namely, 300 miles separating you from your boyfriend. Now, maybe you don’t

need to put a plane ticket between you. You do need to recognize that uninterrupted togetherness is the death rat tle of romance. Don’t believe me? Just rewrite a lit tle fiction: Let’s see ... Romeo and Juliet get together and move into a tract house in the suburbs, just down the block from Heathclif f and Cathy, Rick and Ilsa, Carrie and Mr. Big. (“Romeo, Romeo ... where are the trash can liners?”)

Stop expecting your boyfriend to be your every thing. He’s a man, not a mall. And you’re a girlfriend, not a mind-reader. If he still loves you and wants to be with you, he needs to star t forming words about what’s bothering him and inser ting them into your ears. If he can’t do his par t, ask him to go in with you on hiring somebody to fish the words out of him. It’s your best shot at turning the clock back to “Can’t Get Enough of Your Love” from “Can’t Figure Out How To Get You Depor ted.” Then again, why stop the clock three years ago? There’s much to be said for going back to a lit tle seventhgrade fun — Spin the bot tle, truth or dare and strip Twister — much more than can be said for boring grownup games like “Seven Million Minutes in the Closet” and “With This Ring I Thee Weld.”

What’s up with guys wanting to know if they’re the best I’ve ever had? The guy I’m with now probably ranks in the top three, and with my history, that’s quite an accomplishment. Still, although I don’t like to lie, I’m not sure how to answer this question. Does it really matter all that much anyway?

—Notch Rot You can answer this question one of two ways. Truthfully: “You’re the best I’ve ever had.”

Or untruthfully: “You’re the best I’ve ever had.”

Either response is likely to lead to some fiercely probing questions from the man, such as “Really!?” At this point, you might be tempted to tell him the truth. Go ahead — as long as it’s “You da man!” Of course, this answer may lead to fur ther excavation on his par t; probably with a silver teaspoon, like the ones they use to dig up 10,000-year-old archeological ar tifacts. Tell him any thing else, and you’ll never hear the end of it, because he’ll be digging with a backhoe until he can get his head around what’s bet ter about the other guy. On the bright side, this should allow you to see China without the expense of plane fare.

— © 2002, Amy Alkon

Got A Problem?

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171 Pier Ave., Box 280 • Santa Monica, CA 90405 or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com

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Swedish • Shiatsu • Stress Relief Call Sasha 803-441-0001 (01/09#7922)

INTEGRAL YOGA

Religion

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38

Bhakti Brown, RYT

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Designed for healthy men 18 - 45.

A great way to rela x House & Hotel Calls Only 706-589-3748 or pgr 739-9139 (01/09#7949)

Call 738-1142 to place your Classified ad today!

Miscellaneous For Sale Computer - 166MHZ Pentium-Monitor, Keyboard, Mouse, 56k Modem. Good Condition and internet ready. $250.00, Call Nancy at 803-641-0446 (03/13#7951) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Golf Clubs: Biggest Big Ber tha, regular graphite, 10°, $150.00; Adams GT-363 Titanium, regular graphite, 10°, $100.00; Steelhead Plus 7-wood, graphite $90.00; Call Les 860-3387 (03/13#7951) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Mounted Deer Head and shoulder 8 point,Very Good Condition $145.00/Door 15 panel solid oak ex terior $95.00 (03/13#7950) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Book: Black West Documentary, Pictorial History, 9 & 10 Calvary Buf falo Soldier & more $300, OBO Call, C. Allen 706-5609782 (03/06#7946) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Commercial Freezer, 1 year old , double door, all stainless steel. $800.00 OBO Barstools 803-594-9594 (03/06#7942) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Sears Lawn Tractor L.T. 1000 - 21 Horsepower 46”-cut Used 4 Months - Like New - Original New Price $1,400.00 - Now Only $900.00 OBO. 706-836-3082 (02/27#7941) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Midwest Ferret Cage, 4 f t. tall. 3 Levels.

Great Condition. $125.00. 2 Water bot tles are free with cage. Retails for $189.99. Call 706-854-0231 (02/20#7932) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Queen Anne Style Dining Room Group, Cherry finish, table, 6 chairs, and china cabinet. $250.00, Call 706-836-3120 (02/13#7927) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Kenwood Stereo, 3 disc CD changer, equalizer, dual casset te player, surround sound speakers and rack. $200.00. Call 706-7930077 (02/13#7927) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Small Truck Toolbox. Metal with tonneau cover for bed. $50.00, 803-278-2669 (02/06#7919) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– 6 New Patio Chairs, Outside - Mar tha Stewar t - Paid $360.00 - Sell $180.00, Call 279-0447 (02/06#7917) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Kindercraft Crib, White enamel wide slats excellent condition. Linen drawer pulls out from underneath w/ mat tress $200.00 Call Kim, 706-733-0031, Leave message.

(01/30#7913) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Golf Clubs. Several golf clubs: custom set of irons ($95.00), Mizuno driver ($35.00), 2 fairway woods ($20.00) 706-495-9900 (01/30#7911) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Mountain Bike, Gary Fisher Big Sur, 18” frame, Indy C, New velociraptors, completely rebuilt $400. 706-534-9639 (01/23#7903) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Golf Clubs-Taylor Made irons super steel.

Rifle shaf ts reg. flex 3-PW $250, 706-6507487. (01/09#7896)

Alt. Lifestyles

MARLBORO STATION Your Party Station

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Fri, Sat & Sun 18 to Party • 21 to Drink Name___________________________________________________ Address________________________________________________ DOB___________Email___________________________________ $1 off Admission w/ coupon 141 Marlboro Station, Aiken • 803-644-6485

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www.metspirit.com Talk Line BORED HOUSEWIVES Swingers! Bisexuals! * Live One-on-One * 1-702-216-3500 .66¢ - $1/min. cc/checks 1-900-420-0420 Ex t. 165 $2.95/min. 18+ T-tone (01/09#7902)

Wheels

Dead Bodies Wanted

We want your dead junk or scrap car bodies.

We tow away and for some we pay.

706/829-2676

OR

706/798-9060

Club Argos The Friendliest Alternative Bar in the CSRA Open Every Day at 9:00pm

Thursday - Karaoke Party Friday - Talent Show w/ Cash Prize Bring your talent for all to see.

Drink & Drown Saturday - Argos Cabaret w/ Special Guest UPCOMING EVENTS Saturday, January 25th Shirley Q. Liquor Buy tickets now, before they’re gone.

Saturday, February 15th Jerry Halliday the puppet master Argos welcomes Gay, TVTS, BDSM, Bi, Swingers & all others.

481-8829 Argos opens daily @ 9:00pm Email: clubargos@aol.com Located @ 1923 Walton Way across from Ming Wah Parking and Entrance in back of Heckle St.

Travel

39 M E T R O S P I R I T

To become a member, call 1-888-223-7044 To listen and respond to ads, call 1-900-226-8908 Calls cost $1.99 per min., Must be 18+.

,call 1-866-832-4685

To respond to ads using a WANNA KNOW A SECRET? I’m available! BF, 47, serious about life, seeks single African-American male, 40-50, with similar sentiment. ☎660976 SELF-SUFFICIENT... hard-working DWF, 38, full-figured, Leo, smoker, with one child, seeks DWM, 38-50, smoker, children are fine. ☎659397 TIME TO HAVE A BLAST Honest SWF, 43, enjoys spending time with my daughter, bowling, dining out, Nascar, movies, baseball games, camping. Seeking honest, genuine SWM, 43-50, for fun and friendship. ☎554752 NOW IS THE TIME SWPF, 55, likes dancing, walks, movies, the lake, dining out. Seeking SWM, N/S, 48-65, for fun and friendship, and who knows what later! ☎653476 POSITION AVAILABLE! Mother of two lovely daughters, 34, employed with the Board of Education, seeks SW/HM, 33-48, to begin with friendship and possibly evolve into an LTR. ☎651992 KIND-HEARTED, REAL Petite, green-eyed SWC mother, 39, Scorpio, N/S, seeks WM, 33-45, N/S, to build a love that lasts a lifetime. ☎648419 I’LL COOK Fun-loving, intelligent SBF, 22, Capricorn, N/S, student, mother of three, seeks man, 21-30, to accompany me in life. Kids a plus. ☎647824 TIME WITH YOU Voluptuous BF, 39, seeks a BM, N/Drugs, social drinker ok. I enjoy reading, dining out, movies, church activities. ☎646176 IN SEARCH OF MY SOULMATE He must be a tall (5’10”-6’4”), Christian man, 42-55, N/S, who is honest, faithful, devoted and lively. I am a SBPF, 5’6”, 150lbs, and looking for LTR. ☎641005 TAKE IT SLOW SWF, 49, 5’6”, reddish/blonde hair, outgoing personality, wants to build a serious relationship with a SWM. ☎642309 THE MAN OF MY DREAMS... is easy to get along with, and has a great sense of humor and fun. Single mom, 28, 5’, brown/blue, is looking for her soulmate. ☎640587 MOVIES AND MORE Seeking a man with a lively attitude who likes movies. I am a SF, 42, looking for love. ☎636995 GOOD-HEARTED DWF, 61, 5’9”, honest, neat in appearance, with a good sense of humor. Seeking WM, 60-70, who’s honest and caring. ☎574264

We Purchase Fine Swiss Watches, Estate Jewelry and Diamonds.

Monday-Saturday 10am-9pm 2635 Washington Road | Augusta, Georgia 30904 | 706.738.7777 www.windsorjewelers.net SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL Multiracial SF, 56, 5’7”, animal lover, mother professor of languages, loves beaches, travel, collecting art, reading, and listening to music (Latin and classical). Seeking SM, to share life and love. ☎610690 LONELY WOMAN SBF, 32, single mom, seeks SWPM, quality military man who has old-fashioned values, financially secure, for LTR. ☎591885 AN AUTUMN SPECIAL Hard-working WF, 38, 5’4”, 100lbs, blonde/brown, enjoys biking, watersports, cooking, and travel. Seeking WM, 35-50, for possible LTR. ☎965904

LET’S MAKE A CONNECTION Laid-back, easygoing, employed SBM, 48, seeks similar SB/WF, 30-60, into music, dining out, spending quality time together.

There’s no need to be lonely! ☎919786 A REAL MAN Handsome SBM, 39, compassionate, financially secure, seeks romantic, attractive, compassionate BF, 21-45, for romantic dinners, movies, walks along the beach, true friendship, LTR. ☎920361 OLD-FASHIONED GUY SHM, 34, 5’4”, 170lbs, Virgo, N/S, writes and loves country western music, helping the homeless, church. Seeking SHF, 32-36, N/S, with similar interests. ☎835306

WAITING ON YOU Clean-cut DWM, 44, 5’4”, brown/hazel, great personality, enjoys dining out, trips to the lake, camping, sports (football, baseball). Searching for young lady, no games, interested in LTR founded on friendship. ☎910547 MATURE WOMAN WANTED Hardworking DM, 48, brown/green, looking for S/DF, who’s independent, spontaneous, open-minded and mature, D/D-free, who knows what she wants in life, for friendship and maybe romance. ☎898762 LET’S HOOK UP 34-year-old SBM, 5’9”, 180lbs, Aquarius, nurse, bald head, new to area, open-minded, fun-loving, hopeless romantic. Seeking woman who loves to be romanced. ☎849401 MY DREAM LADY... is a spontaneous woman with a serious mind and who knows what she wants in life.

SBM, 42, believes dreams can come true. ☎907741 LOOK ME UP Well-educated, professional SWM, 45, no children, never married, enjoys boating, fishing, camping and exploring life. Seeking SF, with similar interests, for fun and friendship. ☎898023 FUN FOR ALL SWM, 50, seeks intelligent, aware SF, in shape, for indoor and outdoor fun. Looking for a friendship, that may lead to more. ☎902103 PHONE CALL AWAY Self-employed SWM, 40, Pisces, N/S, N/D, enjoys dining out, movies, cooking in, many activities. Seeking similar SWF, 28-45, N/S, to share good times with. ☎882776

Stud Finder YOU HAVE 6 NEW MATCHES

THE LONG RUN SBF, 43, single parent, health service technician, Capricorn, N/S, loves basketball.

Seeking BM, 37-47, N/S, for friendship, love, and beyond. ☎872160 HONESTY IS KEY DWF, 38, mother of two/homemaker, loves Bon Jovi, dining out, quiet time at home.

Seeking honest, sincere SWM, 38-45.

Could it be you? ☎910404 TRUE: One is a lonely number. DWF, no children, self-supporting, my physical appearance won’t embarrass you, retired and seeking a loving, truthful, reliable man, 50-75. ☎896701 TIRED OF BEING ALONE SWF, 49, 5’9”, 164lbs, Cancer, N/S, social drinker, mother of one, enjoys music, dining out, reading. Seeking SWM, 44-59, N/S, for LTR. ☎890570 SERIOUS ABOUT LIFE SBCF, 50, 165lbs, Scorpio, N/S, churchgoer, mother of one, seeks outgoing, christian SBM, 50-60, N/S, with good heart, who is serious, for LTR. ☎885036 OLD-FASHIONED VALUES Honest, relaxed, christian SBF, 56, Aries, N/S, enjoys cooking, dining out, quiet times at home. Seeking marriage-minded, financially secure SBM, 50-56, N/S, for LTR. ☎829149 COMPATIBLE? Funny, smart SBF, 19, fun-loving, friendly, enjoys movies, clubbing, hand holding, dancing. Seeking SM, with like interests and qualities for friendship and possible LTR. ☎701088 SWEET AND SINGLE SBF, 30, Scorpio, N/S, student, enjoys quality time, movies, dining out, quiet times.

Seeking friendship with SBM, 29-43, for possible LTR. ☎890152 BEACH BUM SBF, 31, with bachelor’s degree in communications, Taurus, N/S, loves dining out, movies, working out, and reading. Seeking man, 26-36. ☎869451 ARE YOU SINCERE? SF, 28, blond/blue, enjoys the gym, time with family and friends. Looking for an honest guy, 26-35, who is not into games. ☎857530 A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN... inside and out. SBF, 26, 5’10’’, light complexion, enjoys movies, music, just having a good time. Seeking honest, sincere man for LTR. ☎861401 GENUINE GEMINI Sweet SWF, 21, 6’, in medical field, enjoys Nascar, long walks. Seeking tall SWM, 2535, with similar interests. Friendship first, possible LTR. ☎848654 I’LL WRITE YOU A POEM! SF, 25, 5’4’’, 150lbs, Virgo, enjoys reading, cooking, music, movies. Seeking a man who likes to try new things. ☎841437 GOOD GIRL Attractive SWF, 38, 5’4”, 145lbs, blonde/ hazel, N/S, Pisces, enjoys outdoors.

Seeking tall SWM, 30-42. ☎864247 SINCERE BEAUTY Sophisticated SBCF, 23, 5’2”, 140lbs, interested in seeking educated, independent, employed SBM, 23-30, long walks, stimulating conversation, friendship, dating, more. ☎849311 I LIKE LIFE Single mom, 32, looking for a man with a vibrant personality and a love for living. ☎844138

WILLING TO MAKE TIME Busy, hard-working SBF, 31, nurse, mother of one, Taurus, N/S, enjoys traveling, walks, shopping. Seeking SBM, 31-39, N/S, for LTR. ☎836074 TAKE A CHANCE Laid-back SF, 30, enjoys dining in/out, going to the movies, church activities.

Seeking SM, secure in himself to share those things. ☎767576 BRAINS & BEAUTY Spirited executive SBF, 41, 5’8”, 138lbs, Gemini, enjoys dancing, dining, intellectual conversation, laughter, picnics, adventures.

Seeking humorous, classy gentleman, 3545, with kindred spirit. ☎751454 SKATE, RIDE, BOWL, ETC. African-American mom, 23, 5’, 159lbs, mother of two, currently in school, looking for honest, trustful family-man, 20s-30s, who’ll give his 100%. ☎751642 I’M YOUR VENUS SWF, 44 (looks younger), 5’, blonde/blue, with a full-figure, seeks HM, 5’5”-6’, who is secure. ☎747133 WORK OF ART Voluptuous SBF, 28, loves fishing, swimming, cooking. Looking for a man with the same passions. ☎747775 IMPORT FROM EUROPE This foreign born SWF, 40, Aries, N/S, seeks a fine BM, 35-50, smoker, for friendship and dating. ☎744559 ATTENTION... your miracle date is in Augusta. SF seeks military male, 28-50, with good qualities and values. Children ok, race open. ☎732101 COMPANIONSHIP DWF, 48, enjoys antiquing, travel, dining out, movies and more. Seeking DWM, 4858, for loving, tender relationship. ☎732056 AQUARIUS HERE SWF, 18, brown/brown, loves, reading, travel, movies, outdoors. Seeking mature companion with an easygoing attitude, for friendship, possibly more. ☎732141 GOD LOVER Athletic, shy SBF, 33, 5’5”, 160lbs, Gemini, smoker, enjoys church, dining out, cooking, traveling, shopping, reading. Seeking outgoing man, 35-50, smoker, for LTR. ☎709843 LOOKING FOR FRIEND SWF, 29, 5’7”, 129lbs, Gemini, N/S, enjoys sports cars, movies, and more. Seeking SWM, 21-35, kids ok, for friendship first. ☎706587 NEED A SPARK... try me. Attractive, petite SWF, 57, fun, friendly and affectionate, raising grand children, seeks SWM, mid 50s-60s, trustworthy with open heart, for dining, movies, music.

Friendship first. ☎702738 NO GAMES PLEASE DWF, 33, 5’10”, full-figured, brown/hazel, self-employed mother of three, seeks WM, 25-45, honest, faithful, devoted, for fun, friendship, LTR. ☎680330 TWO PIECES OF A PUZZLE Full-figured, very attractive, independent woman, 31, 5’2”, seeks someone special to spend time with. You: honest, fun-loving, varied interests. ☎685405 ABSOLUTE ALTRUISM SBF, 42, 5’7”, 125lbs, seeks emotionally secure gentleman, 35+, with honor, wit, and wisdom. ☎605946 STRONG WILL SBF, 45, outgoing, attractive, youthful, enjoys writing, music, traveling. Seeking mature, strong-willed SBM, 35-48, for friendship. ☎965893 ALL I THINK ABOUT IS YOU SBF, 28, enjoys cooking, reading, traveling, spending time with my kids/family. Looking for a male, 25-40, who likes similar things, friendship first. ☎672206

Mobile Dating. The easiest way to meet great people.

GUIDELINES: DATE MAKER ads are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses. First meetings should occur in a public place. Abbreviations are permitted only to indicate gender preference, race, and religion. We suggest your ad contain a self-description, age range, lifestyle and avocations. Ads and voice messages containing explicit sexual language will not be accepted. This publication reserves the right to revise copy containing objectionable phrases; to reject in its sole discretion, any advertisement on account of its text. This publication assumes no responsibility for the content or reply to any DATE MAKER ad. The advertiser assumes complete liability for the content and all replies to any advertisement or recorded message and for any claims made against this publication and its agents as a result thereof. The advertiser agrees to indemnify and hold this publication, its employees and its agents harmless from all costs, expenses (including reasonable attorney fees), liabilities and damages resulting from or caused by the publication or recording placed by the advertiser or any reply to any such advertisement. By using DATE MAKER, the advertiser agrees not to leave his/her phone number, last name or address in his/her voice greeting. Not all boxes contain a voice greeting.

ABBREVIATIONS

To purchase more than your free 30 words, at $2.00 per word, please call 1-800-234-5120

M B D F H C LTR

Male Black Divorced Female Hispanic Christian Long-term Relationship

G W A S J P N/D N/S

Gay White Asian Single Jewish Professional Non-Drinker Non-smoker

Become a member of Augusta’s hottest new way to meet singles! Call today!

J A N 9 2 0 0 3

40

To become a member, call 1-888-223-7044 To listen and respond to ads, call 1-900-226-8908

M E T R O

J A N 9 2 0 0 3

To respond to ads using a LET’S GET IN TOUCH! SWM, 20, Cancer, smoker, enjoys fishing, hunting, walking, playing games. Seeking older woman, 30-60, for possible relationship. ☎888111 ARE YOU LONESOME? SM, 37, 6’5’’, 350lbs, would like to meet a nice female, 18-40, to get to know first. Let’s see where this leads! ☎780940 IN NEED OF LOVE, SERIOUS SWM, 44, 6’, never married, blond/blue, Aries, smoker, seeks honest, romantic SWF, 25-38, enjoys sports, country walks, and more, for LTR, marriage. ☎889184 THE PERFECT MATE DBM, 40, 6’, 195lbs, with 1 child, Capricorn, smoker, homeowner, loves gardening, cooking, and hunting. Seeking WF, 28-42, petite, to bedazzling. ☎873556 NOT JUST ANOTHER... stud. DBM, 33, with 3 children, Libra, N/S, seeks a lucky lady, 25-45, N/S, with whom to share quality time. ☎868350 GET IN TOUCH WITH ME SM, 21, 6’3’’, athletic build, student, loves movies, clubs, church. Seeking compassionate, down-to-earth, fun woman. ☎861556 DON’T MISS THIS! SBM, 45, 5’10’’, 230lbs, interested in sports, jazz, movies, dining out. Would like to meet a woman with the same interests. ☎862898 SHOW ME YOUR SMILE SM, 44, enjoys kayaking, cooking, art, biking, exercise, outdoors. Looking for a female, 34-50, who has the same kinds of interests. ☎858979 HEY LADIES! Outgoing happy SM, 24, 5’6”, 150lbs, slender and fit, brown complexion, braided hair, seeks SF, who’s open-minded and down for whatever. ☎767971 ARE YOU 26-48?

WM, brown/blue, likes fishing, camping, scuba diving, travel, and woodworking. If you would like to jon me, call! ☎715263 NOT A JOCK Peace-loving, dark blonde, 5’11”, 200lbs, friends say handsome, I say ok. Seeking Asian, mulatto, or dark haired american lady, 25-35, no kids, for travel, dining out, plays, and music events. ☎882215 KNOCK-KNOCK, WHO’S THERE? Call me and find out. SWM, 34, Cancer, N/S, loves to tell jokes. Seeking WF, 25-39, N/S, for friendship and relationships. ☎775609 POET SEEKS MUSE SBM, 45, loves all sports, board games, fishing, travel. Seeking a woman to share movies, dining and romance with. ☎843396 DARE TO DREAM Outgoing SBM, 21, 5’9”, 165lbs, Capricorn, N/S, loves going out, outdoors, children.

Seeking SWF, 20-26, N/S, for possible family. ☎835444 EARLY XMAS GIFT Very romantic SBM, 31, 6’1”, 255lbs, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys church, dining out, cooking. Seeking stable SBF, 25-35, for friendship first, leading to something longterm. ☎837718 SEEKING CHRISTIAN WOMAN Friendly, committed, independent SBCM, 42, 5’11”, enjoys quiet evenings. Seeking attractive, committed, independent SBCF for friendship, possible LTR. ☎796760 LET’S TALK SM, 28, 6’5”, 320lbs, enjoys sports, reading, movies, dining out, travel. Seeking attractive, intelligent, sensual SF, with similar interests, for dating and more. ☎796390 LET YOUR HAIR DOWN SHM, 26, Leo, N/S, lives a regular, cleancut lifestyle. Seeking a petite, active woman, 18-30, sophisticated southern belle, with back woods babe heart. ☎790345 YOU WIN MY HEART SWM, 44, N/S, seeks clean, sincere, honest, intelligent, wise, crafty SBF, 35-45, N/S, for life mate and deep friendship. ☎704669

I’M HERE FOR YOU SM, 42, teacher, seeks honest SF, 21-42, for friendship, possibly more. I like music, movies, conversation. How about you? ☎779153 CALL ME SM, 51, fun-loving, enjoys sporting events, movies, dancing more. Seeking fun woman with similar interests. ☎761290 SEEKS MATURE Spontaneous, sincere SM, 20, seeks older, loving lady, to explore life with, possible LTR. ☎767728 LET’S BE FRIENDS Outgoing, active SM, 31, enjoys sports, traveling, movies, dining out, and fun.

Seeking SF,with same interests. ☎769857 FIT FOR A QUEEN Restaurant manager SWM, 40, 6’, black/ green, moustache, enjoys outdoors, hunting, fishing, camping, movies. Seeking big beautiful woman, 25-50. Tell me about you. ☎754399 GREAT CATCH SWM, 53, enjoys church, music, dining out, travel and more. Seeking kind, understanding SCF, with similar interests. ☎732175 CHANGE R LIVES 4 THE BEST Outdoorsy SWM, 57, enjoys fishing, quiet conversation seeks the right woman to be at my side. Let’s accomplish much in life!

Looking for a SW/HF, 45-60. ☎718103 RESPECT AND DESIRE SBM, 37, 5’8”, 164lbs, hazel eyes, Virgo, N/S, enjoys walks, traveling, mountains, cooking, candlelight dinners. Seeking hardworking SBF, 38-55, business owner, for LTR. ☎707443 TRUE TO HEART SWM, 42, 6’, brown/blue, no children, home-owner, Pisces, N/S, seeks spontaneous SW/A/HF, 21-42, loves the beach, movies, sailing, bike rides, for faithful relationship. ☎709121 R WE A MATCH? SWM, 40, 6’1”, 160lbs, brown/blue, enjoys classic rock, movies, dining, more. Seeking nice, friendly SF, 25-45. ☎965931 ANYONE OUT THERE? SWM, 51, 5’11”, 190lbs, brown/green, seeks SF, for conversations, casual dates and maybe something more down the line. ☎701908

YOU NEVER KNOW Fun-loving, easygoing GWM, 51, 5’11”, 198lbs, enjoys cooking, movies, fishing, walking. Seeking interesting GWM, 18-33, who’s full of life, for casual relationship, possibly more. ☎676662 DOESN’T PLAY GAMES Unattached GBM, 41, interested in meeting open-minded, fun-loving, honest, truthful, compassionate and loyal GM for LTR. ☎920995 DARK CHOCOLATE SBM, 23, with a dark complexion, wants to go out and have good times with a great guy. ☎917508 CALL ME... you will not be disappointed. SM, 35, Indian, 5’9”, seeks the same. Let’s get together. ☎916175 COOL WORLD SBM, 22, loves bowling, football, chess. In search of a man who loves the same things. ☎907631 LET’S JUST CUDDLE Lonely GWM, 33, Aries, smoker, enjoys quiet nights, relaxing, being with somebody.

Seeking GWM, 20-30, for possible LTR. ☎887748

How do you

SEEKING MAN OF COLOR GWM, 31, 5’8”, 164lbs, brown/gray, moustache, goatee, down-to-earth, very openminded, seeks SB/HM, 23+, for friendship, maybe more. ☎575272 YOU WON’T BE SORRY Real, honest, and sweet GBM, 18, 5’11”, dark-skinned, Gemini, N/S, seeks friendly GBM, 18-35, not into games. I’m ready for a commitment. ☎831448 BE YOURSELF Honest, caring SM, 47, 5’10”, 220lbs, seeks outgoing, ambitious, down-to-earth man, to share friendship, fun times and maybe more. ☎895468 I’D LOVE TO MEET! SM, 47, likes dining out, having fun, malls, movies, television. Looking for sincere male for possible relationship. ☎861252 NEW TO THIS BiWM, 49, 5’10”, thick, black/blue, Libra, N/S, seeks friendly, fun-loving GWM, 35-65, N/S, for possible LTR. ☎839145 IT’S YOUR CALL GWM, young 46, 5’11”, 200lbs, brown/ brown, masculine, outgoing, enjoys travel, dining out, movies, shopping, Nascar.

Would like to meet honest, passionate GM, with similar interests, for dating, possible LTR. Serious inquiries only. ☎792384 FREE SPIRIT SBM, 24, loves having fun, enjoys tennis, racquetball, waterskiing. Seeking SM, to share a night out on the town, friendship and maybe a lasting relationship. ☎768054 TAKE THAT CHANCE Brown-skinned GBM, 35, 5’11”, 150lbs, who likes quiet evenings, reading, dining out, movies and stimulating conversations.

Seeking SB/HM, 30-50, for friendship, possibly more. ☎753854 SHOW ME THE TOWN... and what there is to do around here. Me: SWM, 42, N/S, new to the area. You: SWM, under 51, anxious to show me how wonderful Augusta is. ☎719366 LOOKING FOR LOVE GWM, 41, 5’8’, 140lbs, Pisces, enjoys fishing, television, wood working, gardening, arts, crafts. Seeking GWM, 25-45, for friendship first, possible LTR. ☎705204 I KNOW WHERE IT’S AT SBM, 25, practical yet fun, outgoing, Aquarius, smoker, seeks a masculine, alluring, well-rounded BM, 23-45, smoker, with his priorities in order. ☎695448

,call 1-866-832-4685

OUT SPOKEN SWM, 32, 5’11”, 145lbs, enjoys camping, fishing, Nascar. Seeking laid-back WM, 2335, for LTR. ☎560095 BEYOND SWM, 32, 5’11”, 155lbs, light hair, looking for good time with GM, 18-45, ☎966003

CHURCH-GOER SBF, 38, Virgo, N/S, heavy-duty equipment operator, seeks BF, 30-45. Enjoys motorcycle riding, playing bass guitar. ☎799776 I WON’T LET YOU DOWN Single GBF, 32, mother, non-smoker, looking to become acquainted with a laid-back, sensual GBF, who enjoys quiet times, movies. Interested? ☎910581 FRIENDSHIP SBF, 38, 5’7”, slim, fit, seeks SF, for friendship and fun. Must be outgoing, love to wine and dine, travel, movies and theater. ☎878217 CHOCOLATE SEEKS CREAM SF, 39, new to the area, down-to-earth, loves laughing, sight-seeing. Seeking WF, 30-45, to show me a great time! ☎861222 SOMEONE TO LOVE GBF, 21, with brown complexion, seeks femme GBF, 21-30, with no baggage, and her priorities straight. ☎843696 VERY PRETTY SBF...

28, two children, confident, feminine, seeks female, 20-35, with the same qualities, who is not into head games. ☎785531 A GOOD HEART SF, 39, goes to church, works for a living, likes having fun, going on trips. Seeking a similar female, 37-49. ☎780112 SPECIAL FRIENDSHIP Attractive, feminine SWF, 41, 5’4”, seeks a very open-minded WF, 35-48, for fun and exciting times. ☎775074 RAINBOW SEEKER Seeking my butch. SWF, 41, 5’2”, enjoys movies, walks, reading, quality snuggle time. Honesty is a must. Seeking SWF, with no drama, 30+. ☎754885

JOIN ME GBF, 32, nurse, part-time student, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys bowling, movies, shopping, traveling. Seeking casual relationship with woman, 25-45. ☎711628 BACK IN THE SADDLE AGAIN SBF, 58, mature, attractive, young-at-heart, Sagittarius, N/S, seeks woman, 48-62, N/S, who is ready to live again and likes traveling, playing cards, and bowling. ☎691703 TO THINE OWN SELF... be true. SBF, 27, 5’5”, 165lbs, Sagittarius, N/S, has 2 kids, enjoys walks, movies, and quiet times. Seeking an honest woman, 2735, N/S, for friendship first and foremost. ☎693934 IT’S ALL IN YOUR HANDS Nice, available stud wanted. I’m a teacher in Augusta, 40, who would like to start a friendship with another female, and progress into something more. ☎664842 BEAUTIFUL WOMAN SEEKS... beautiful woman. I’m 5’3”, physically fit, 132lbs, would like to meet fit female, 25-40, who would enjoy going to movies. Please be discreet. ☎661884 GET TO KNOW THE REAL ME Dark-skinned young woman, 23, 4’9”, attractive, fun-loving, nice, caring, honest, laid-back. Seeking GF, 23-29, for casual relationship. ☎635372 I’M LOOKING 4 U Easygoing, loyal SBF, 31, 5’3”, 155lbs, security officer, people person, fun-loving, nice, caring, honest, enjoys bowling, movies, cuddling at home. Seeking trustworthy, outgoing SBF, 26-35, for friendship, maybe LTR. ☎965835 FRIENDSHIP FIRST! Funny, smart, down-to-earth GBF, 5’6”, 125lbs, loves long walks, hand holding.

Seeking GF, 21-30, who likes kids and doesn’t play games. ☎965829 ZEST FOR LIFE Articulate, adventurous WF, 32, 5’8”, brown/brown, enjoys animals, running, movies and dining. Looking for WF, 25-40, for friendship. ☎965827 GIVE ME A RING Cute SBF, 30-something, seeks attractive SF, 25-45, for friendship, maybe more. No games. ☎965825 WASTE NO TIME GBF, 36, enjoys dining out, cooking, dining out. Seeking attractive, open-minded, fun, nice GF, 25-45, for friendship and possibly more. ☎965823

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■ Automotive Spirit

41 M E T R O S P I R I T

Free Automotive Ads

J A N 9

BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE METROPOLITAN SPIRIT AND GERALD JONES HONDA

Cars 1981 CADILLAC EL Dorado, one owner, very clean car, V8, auto, most power options, many new parts, runs great, $1300 firm, 706-860-6409 (805/109) ————————————— 1982 HONDA ACCORD, silver, 4dr, 5spd, good clutch, new tires, not running, $300 OBO, 706-868-7599 (829/130) ————————————— 1986 FORD TEMPO, white/blue, one owner, runs well, 5spd, am/fm, cassette, $950 OBO, 706-651-9969 (872/213) ————————————— 1989 CADILLAC SEVILLE, 4dr, leather, blue, tip top condition, $4000, 706-556-6124 (553/0206) ————————————— 1990 CADILLAC SEVILLE, 4dr, runs good, $3000, 803640-3078 or 803-648-3443 after 6 pm. (806/109) ————————————— 1990 PORSCHE 928, black/black, 5spd, leather, 135K, 6CD changer, excellent condition, call Ralph 706-6511114 or 706-951-0013 (870/213) ————————————— 1991 VOLVO 240, maroon, good condition, AC, PS, PB, PW, am/fm, cassette, cruise, $3000, 912-829-4556 (817/116) —————————————

1992 BMW 525, series sedan, auto, great engine, leather, power sunroof, 155K, only $5790, 706-495-9900 (831/206) ————————————— 1992 BMW 525, auto, air, CD, low miles, factory warranty, 37 mpg, must sell, $8500, 706863-7071 (832/206) ————————————— 1992 BMW 735il, gray, CD, 14K, lovingly cared for, all extras, $13,000, 706-7365333 (827/130) ————————————— 1992 CHEVY CAMERO RS, 25th Anniversary Edition, green, gray interior, 305, auto, t-tops, excellent condition, 120K, $6000 firm, 706-3394531 (811/116) ————————————— 1992 HONDA CIVIC LX, white, 4dr, auto, 115K, local one owner, good condition, $2500, 706-733-3683 (821/123) ————————————— 1992 INFINITI G20, runs great, 4dr, CD, leather interior, must sell, $1500 OBO, 706823-6607 (815/116) ————————————— 1993 FORD T-BIRD, excellent condition, 100K, AC, new tires, adult driven, non-smoker, garage kept, service record, hard to find, $2750 OBO, 706836-3082 (823/123) ————————————— 1993 FORD TAURUS, very good condition, new tires and brakes, low mileage 66K, loaded, as is, reduced, for

the power of dreams

GERALD JONES

HONDA 2 0 0 3 G O R D O N H I G H W AY • A U G U S TA , G A • 7 0 6 - 7 3 3 - 2 2 1 0 • W W W. G E R A L D J O N E S H O N D A . C O M

quick sale, $3000, 706-7339434 or 706-721-8304 (808/116) ————————————— 1993 FORD TEMPO, white w/red interior, auto, 4dr, clean, runs, new am/fm, CD, AC, 4cyl, clear title, $1600, call after 5 pm 706-560-2025 (800/109) ————————————— 1993 HONDA ACCORD, white, manual, PL & W, AC tape, cruise, $2500, 706-8548665 (833/0206) ————————————— 1994 CADILLAC DEVILLE, hard to find any nicer, 94K, great in and out, $8000,

803-648-6731 or 803-6452352 (828/130) ————————————— 1994 CHRYSLER LHS, 3.5, auto, 101K, burgundy, grey leather, AC, cruise, tilt, am/fm/CD, power everything, clean, $4500, 706-860-5001 (100/116) ————————————— 1995 VW JETTA, VR6, GLX, red, loaded, mint condition, $6500 OBO, 803-819-0132 (826/123) ————————————— 1995 BMW 325i, white, 5spd, 72K, excellent condition, premium package, priced to sell (KBB: $12-$15,000) asking

$11,800, 706-722-0665 (816/116) ————————————— 1996 HONDA ACCORD EX, V6, automatic, all power, leather, alloys, CD, cruise, sunroof, remote, garaged, excellent condition, 81K, $10,500, 706-733-7297 (813/116) ————————————— 1996 NISSAN 200SX, green, 5spd, cruise, CD, well taken care of, $3400 OBO, 706-2671295 (814/116) ————————————— 1996 OLDSMOBILE 88 LSS, 4dr, 62K, new tires, leather interior, like new, $7500, 706855-0468 (820/123)

————————————— 1996 PONTIAC GRAND Prix GTP, white, rear spoiler, tint windows, 3.4L, V6 high output, 4spd auto w/OD, well cared for, 129K, $6500, Jim 706-721-3365 days or 706547-7878 eve. (822/123) ————————————— 1996 TOYOTA COROLLA, hunter green, very clean, 4dr, auto, excellent condition, new tires, $3900, 706-364-6756 (213/868) ————————————— 1997 VW PASSAT GLX, VR6 package, gun metal grey, auto, sunroof, black leather, heated

continued on page 42

CHECK US OUT ONLINE WWW.METSPIRIT.COM

2 0 0 3

42 M E T R O

A L L

N E W

S U B A R U

2 0 0 3 B A J A

S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

S TA R T I N G AT $23,995* - All wheel drive - Open Cargo bed - Switch back system expands cargo bed into passenger area for hauling longer items - 2.5 liter box engine - Fully independent heavy-duty raised suspension * Plus destination charge, tax, title & fees

GERALD JONES 1801 Gordon Highway, Augusta

706.738.2561

To Your Ticket eat Finding Gr Flicks.

Check out Cinema Movie Listings to make the best choice for your viewing pleasure!

continued from page 41 seats, mint condition, 68K, $9500, 706-832-1812 or 706868-7159 (213/867) ————————————— 1998 ACURA INTEGRA GSR, white, excellent condition, all power, many extras, 66K, warranty $15,500 OBO, 706-2849693 (812/116) ————————————— 1999 TOYOTA CAMRY LE, CD, auto, lots of miles left, $10,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (855) ————————————— 2000 ACURA 3.2 TL, total luxury, loaded, spotless show stopper, $18,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (852) ————————————— 2000 FORD MUSTANG LX, white/tan, new tires, oil change, 36K, excellent condition, $11,400 OBO, call 706733-1901 (866/213) ————————————— 2000 FORD TAURUS, white, full power, V6, must sell, (stk#479), $11,850 wow, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (858) ————————————— 2000 HONDA ACCORD SE, 4dr, auto ABS, alloys, PW, PL, CD/cassette, security system, 32K, trunk-liner & net, $15,600, 706-733-6807 (835/0206) ————————————— 2000 MAZDA MIATA, green, convertible, extra clean, must have, won’t last, (stk#240-A), $16,515, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (857) ————————————— 2000 NISSAN MAXIMA, full power, must see, very low payments, (stk#409), $17,030, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-2020002 (856) ————————————— 2000 SATURN SL1, silver, 4dr, AC, am/fm, CD, great condition, $10,000 or take over payments ($299.31/mo.), 706210-1273 (803/109) ————————————— 2001 CHRYSLER SEBRING LXI, dark blue, grey leather, convertible, power, CD, 35K, asking $15,998, 706-8630175 (804/109) ————————————— 2001 HONDA ACCORD, Coupe, V6, 5K, $21,595, Gerald Jones Honda, 706733-2210 (846) ————————————— 2001 HONDA CIVIC EX, CD, auto, extra clean, $13,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706733-2210 (849) ————————————— 2001 HONDA ACCORD EX, leather, manual transmission, $19,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (847) ————————————— 2002 HONDA ACCORD, 15K, loaded, absolutely beautiful, $18,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (851) ————————————— 2002 HONDA CIVIC LX, silver, coupe, auto, CD, full power, extra clean, (stk#2560-A), special $14,350 very sharp, Andy

Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (859) ————————————— 2002 MITSUBISHI ECLIPSE, silver, coupe, auto, CD, full power, must see, low miles, $14,995, low payments, call now, call quick, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (860) ————————————— 2002 SATURN SL1, auto, PS, PB, CD, AC, 19K, factory warranty, like new condition, $8950, 706-863-7071 (802/109)

1985 HONDA SABRE, VF700, V-4 engine, adult-owned, excellent condition, 14K, $1300, 706-373-9068 (830/206) ————————————— 2000 HONDA XR650R, enduro off road only, XC, many power enhancing extras, priced to sell 706-309-9526 after 6 pm (458/0206) ————————————— 2002 HONDA SABRE, 1099cc, custom pearl silver paint job w/fading candy blue flames. 1920 miles, excellent condition, $7600, matching helmet available, 803-2793410 (818/116)

low miles, $16,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (848) ————————————— 2000 JEEP GRAND Cherokee, gold, loaded, (stk#189), won’t last, only $16,700, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (865) ————————————— 2000 TOYOTA 4RUNNER, loaded, must see, full power, $18,200 must sell, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (862) ————————————— 2001 CHEVROLET TAHOE LS, 4X4, 32K, auto, power package, rugged performance, $24,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (854) ————————————— 2001 FORD EXPLORER, white, V8, full power, extra clean, low miles, must see, (stk#476), $17,350, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (861) ————————————— 2001 HYUNDAI SANTA FE, auto, CD, power package, smooth performer, $14,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706733-2210 (853) ————————————— 2001 ISUZU RODEO, V6, full power, very clean, (stk#7063A) $17,500, call now, call quick! Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (863)

Other

Trucks

CESSNA 150 H COMMUTER, 4000 TT, <150 SMOH, for more information call, 803-278-2669 leave message, (869/213)

1985 DODGE RAM Prospector, red, full-size, w/camper shell, 140K, good condition, perfect work truck. $2800, 706-721-2317 (809/109) ————————————— 1988 DODGE RAM, Charger, w/rebuilt 318 motor, V8, good shape, runs good, needs light transmission work, lots of new part, $1500 OBO 706-7372359 (799/109) ————————————— 1992 TOYOTA PICK UP, am/fm, cassette, PS, XC, trailer hitch, excellent tires, extended cab, $2750 cash, 706-739-1142 (807/109) ————————————— 1993 CHEVY SILVERADO, white w/red interior, 6 cyl, PS, PB, AC, auto, toolbox, great condition, $3500 OBO, 706399-1303 (801/109)

Motorcycles

SUVs 1992 FORD EXPLORER XLT, 4X4, new tires, new transmission, $4500, 803-279-9278 (873/213) ————————————— 1997 FORD EXPLORER XLT, willow green, 4dr, V8, loaded, original owner, extra clean condition, $8850 OBO, 706667-9488 leave message (810/109) ————————————— 1997 FORD EXPLORER XLT, 4WD, PW, PS, PL, PM, leather 85K, extended warranty, excellent condition, $9500, 706733-6582 (834/0206) ————————————— 1997 GMC YUKON SLT, white/burgundy leather, excellent condition, $14,000 OBO, 706-833-0624 (819/116) ————————————— 1998 CHEVY SUBURBAN LS, 3rd seat, rear AC, 1 owner, two tone paint, $16,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706733-2210 (580/1017) ————————————— 1998 ISUZU TROOPER, luxury package, loaded, only $13,500 wow!, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (864) ————————————— 2000 HONDA CRV EX, auto,

Vans 1994 CHEVY ASTRO, 177K, AC replaced 2 yrs ago, excellent condition, $3000, 706738-9662 (871/213) ————————————— 2000 NISSAN QUEST, one owner, 26K, loaded, excellent condition, $15,100, 706-8633895 (825/123) ————————————— 2001 HONDA ODYSSEY LX, meticulously maintained, $19,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (850)

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GUARANTEED CLASSIFIEDS

* Items for sale by an individual may be placed in our Guaranteed Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for ten weeks or until the item sells, whichever comes first. You must call by 5PM on Friday every two weeks to renew the ad or The Metropolitan Spirit will assume the item has been sold and will delete the ad. There is a $5 reinstatement fee if you forget to renew your ad. All items must indicate price. Guaranteed classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies. Guaranteed Classified ads do not include any automotive vehicles, real estate or pets.

RATES: FREE ADS Merchandise Under $250 $8 ADS Merchandise $251 to $500 $15 ADS Merchandise $501 to $1000 $20 ADS Merchandise over $1000 20 Words or Less - No Exceptions.

ADS MUST BE PREPAID DEADLINES: In person - Monday at 3PM By mail, fax or email - Friday at 4PM

FREE AUTO CLASSIFIEDS

* Automobiles for sale by an individual may be placed in our FREE Auto Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for six weeks or until the vehicle sells, whichever comes first. After two weeks, if you want to keep running the same ad, you must call The Metropolitan Spirit by 5 p.m. on Friday or we will assume you sold the vehicle and will delete the ad. All vehicles must indicate price. FREE Auto Classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies or dealers.

TO PLACE YOUR AD: Mail: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914-3809 Email: classified@metspirit.com Fax: 706-733-6663 ADS ARE NOT TAKEN BY PHONE Website: www.metspirit.com Visit Us At: 825 Russell Street, Augusta, GA MUST BE MAILED, FAXED OR EMAILED ON SPECIFIED FORM.

TO PLACE YOUR AD: Mail: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914-3809 Email: classified@metspirit.com Fax: 706-733-6663 Website: www.metspirit.com Visit Us At: 825 Russell Street, Augusta, GA MUST BE MAILED, FAXED OR EMAILED ON SPECIFIED FORM. ADS ARE NOT TAKEN BY PHONE.

GENERAL POLICIES: The Metropolitan Spirit reserves the right to reject, revise, alter, or reclassify any classified advertisement. Please check your ad for errors the first week the ad is published.

The Metropolitan Spirit is not responsible for any errors which appear after the first week the ad is inserted.

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Name_______________________________________Daytime Phone_____________________ Address______________________________________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Payment ❑ Cash ❑ Check ❑ Money Order ❑ Visa ❑ MC Card No./Exp. Date_____________________________________________________________ Billing Address (if different from above)_____________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Ad Copy 20 words or less________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ GENERAL POLICIES: The Metropolitan Spirit reserves the right to reject, revise, alter, or reclassify any classified advertisement. Please check your ad for errors the first week the ad is published. The Metropolitan Spirit is not responsible for any errors which appear after the first week the ad is inserted.

Name_________________________________________________________________________ Daytime Phone_________________________________________________________________ Address______________________________________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Ad Copy 20 words or less________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

C H E C K O U T T H E S E G R E AT P R E - O W N E D D E A L S

C A L L

2002 MITSIBISHI ECLIPSE COUPE

LOW $14,995 MILES!

Silver • CD • Full Power • AT • Low Payments

2001 FORD EXPLORER

$17,350

STK 476

MUST SEE!

V-8 • White • Full Power • Extra Clean • Low Miles

NISSAN MAXIMA

$17,030

STK 409

MUST SEE!

MAZDA MIATA

LAST! $16,515 WON’T

Convertible • X-Clean • Green • Must Have

Full Power • Very Low Payments

2000

2000

FORD TAURUS

STK 479

$11,850

STK 240-A

WOW!

Full Power • V-6 • White • Must Sell

2000

HONDA CIVIC COUPE LX

STK 2560-A

VERY $14,350 SHARP! AT • CD • Full Power • Extra Clean

2002

N O W C A L L Q U I C K

ANDY JONES MAZDA ISUZU

2000 TOYOTA 4-RUNNER

$18,200

MUST SELL!

Loaded • Must See • Full Power

2001 ISUZU RODEO

STK 7063-A

CALL $17,500 QUICK! Full Power • V-6 • Very Clean

1998 ISUZU TROOPER

$13,500

WOW!

Luxury Package • Loaded

2000 JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE

$16,700

STK 189

WON’T LAST!

Gold • Loaded

HUGE SELECTION OF PRE-OWNED AUTOMOBILES & SUV’S IN STOCK!

(803) 202-0002

www.andyjonesmazda.com Open Monday-Friday 9am-8pm, Saturday 9am-7pm At the top of the rise on the Aiken-Augusta Highway in North Augusta

THANK YOU For Supporting Our Advertisers

43 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 9 2 0 0 3

HYUNDAI

RATED #1

Across the Board

HYUNDAI

2003

Accent

Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s New Not Used!

10,990

$

HYUNDAI

2003

With $1000 Holiday Cash

Elantra

stk#8832

Dare to Compare**

$1500 below Honda Civic

189/mo.

$

* With $1000

HYUNDAI

2003

Holiday Cash

Sonata

stk#8870

Dare to Compare**

$2500 less Honda Accord

239/mo.

$

* With $1000

HYUNDAI

2003

Holiday Cash

stk#8819

Sante FE

Dare to Compare**

$1100 below Honda CRV $1500 below Ford Escape

299/mo.

$

*

With $1000 Holiday Cash

stk#8786

*Monthly payment based on $3000 down @ 72 mos. financing with approved credit @ 6.5% financing, see dealer for details. **Price comparisons based on MSRP of comparable models, level of equipment varies. $1000 Holiday Cash includes any factory incentives. Expires 12/30/02.

Mon-Fri: 9am - 7:30pm 10 5 Sat: 9am - 6 pm 5 Open Sunday 1-5pm www.taylorhyundai.com Year 100,000 Miles Power Train Protection

HYUNDAI 3233 Washington Road

706-868-1200

Year 60,000 Mile

Bumper-to-Bumper Coverage

Year Unlimited Miles 24-hr. Roadside Assistance

See Dealer for Details.