Metro Spirit 01.23.2003

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Contents The Metropolitan Spirit

3 M E T R O S P I R I T

JANUARY 23-29, 2003 • FREE WEEKLY • METSPIRIT.COM

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FEATURE

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A Long Shot: Area Municipalites Question Funding for $89 Million Arena By Stacey Eidson ..............................................................14 Cemetary Theft a Doggone Shame By Brian Neill ..........................................22 NEW DINNER ENTREE MENU COMING IN FEBRUARY

Opinion Whine Line ......................................................................4 Thumbs Up, Thumbs Down ...........................................4 This Modern World .........................................................4 Words ...............................................................................6 Suburban Torture ............................................................7 Commentary: Roe v. Wade ............................................8 Austin Rhodes ...............................................................10 Insider ............................................................................11

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Arts

Who Pays for the Arts? ................................................22 Augusta Opera Presents “Side by Side by Sondheim” ....................................................................32 Fried Chicken, Moon Pies and Brand New Art ..........34

Events

8 Days a Week .............................................................26

Cinema: Review “Chicago” a tradional adaptation of the stage production.............40

Cinema

Movie Listings .............................................................36 Review: “The Hours” ...................................................38 Review: “Chicago” .......................................................40 Movie Clock ..................................................................40

Music

2003 Choice Awards Gala Celebrates Local Musicians ......................................................................41 Music By Turner ............................................................42 Chrissie Hynde of The Pretenders Keeps on Breaking New Ground ..................................................................43 Night Life .......................................................................44

Stuff News of the Weird ........................................................47 Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ......................................48 New York Times Crossword Puzzle ............................48 Amy Alkon: The Advice Goddess ................................49 Classifieds .....................................................................50 Date Maker ...................................................................51 Automotive Classifieds ................................................53

This...

EDITOR & PUBLISHER David Vantrease ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Rhonda Jones STAFF WRITERS Stacey Eidson, Brian Neill ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Joe White ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Kriste Lindler, Jennifer H. Mar tin PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Smith GR APHIC ARTISTS Stephanie Carroll, Natalie Holle ASSISTANT TO THE PUBLISHER Meli Gurley RECEPTIONIST/CLASSIFIED COORDINATOR Sharon King ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Lisa Jordan CIRCULATION DIRECTOR Meli Gurley SENIOR MUSIC CONTRIBUTOR Ed Turner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Chuck Shepherd, Rob Brezsny, Austin Rhodes, Amy Alkon, Rachel Deahl CARTOONISTS Tom Tomorrow, Julie Larson

THE METROPOLITAN SPIRIT is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks of the year. Editorial coverage includes ar ts, local issues, news, enter tainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum. The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers. Visit us at www.metspirit.com. Copyright © The Metropolitan Spirit Inc. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited.

Phone: (706) 738-1142 Fax: (706) 733-6663 E-mail: spirit@metspirit.com Letters to the Editor: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, Ga. 30914-3809

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ustin Rhodes’ Christmas column proved forevermore that Austin has led a charmed life. If Comcast, WGAC, and The Spirit were to cut him loose, and if his wife’s show was cancelled, he’d learn to appreciate that people (especially in their 40s and 50s) fall into the unemployed, uninsured, deadbeat world through no fault of their own. In such cases, life is about choices: Pay Visa or pay the gas bill. With meanspirited conservatives such as Austin poised to control the federal government for the next two years, God help us all.

Thanks for those Web sites, especially stupid.com. I am always dieting, so it fun playing the game Feed the Pig. However, with the war looming, I’ve altered the game in my head. Instead of Feed the Pig, it’s called Feed the Prez. I feed George everything from Osama and Saddam shaped, bite-size crackers, Al Qaeda exploding jelly beans, huge Saudi pretzels, (Ken) Lay’s potato chips. N. Korean missile sausage links, chemical eggplants, Karl Rove’s whole brain bread, to last, barrels and barrels of the finest, Arabian cooking oil on the market.

After years of wasteful spending, enacting one property tax increase after another and growing an already bloated city-county payroll, the Augusta commissioners are suddenly looking for ways to reduce spending and “studying” a plan to offer early retirements to employees covered under the 1945 and 1949 pension plans. This must be an election year.

In reference to the person trying to find the correct phone number for a city department: I understand the frustration of the phone number chase played by the city departments.

When my recycling container was stolen, I called the city to get a replacement. After being given number after number, I finally got the right person who seemed surprised that I kept being given the wrong numbers.

She was very helpful and I did receive another container — which was stolen the first time I put it out to be emptied.

Now the Lieberman for President campaign fundraiser, sponsored by No Doz. I work for Gold Cross. We have 11 ambulances on the road. Each ambulance would only have to run six calls per day to make 66 calls daily and 24,000 calls annually, in the public world. I have personally run 15 calls in 24 hours and so have many other people.

Some have run more than 15 calls per 24hour shift. This is not unusual at all.

What do you do with an employee who’s malicious, vindictive, unfair, callous, known to be divisive and possibly racist? At the post office we promote them.

A suggestion for the Golf Hall of Fame: Make it a winter wonderland with lights, everything exciting so people will come down and see it during the winter season when the park is even more dead. Have something to bring families to the park, maybe an upscale Crawfordville, even have hot chocolate. It could be a gorgeous winter wonderland. Let’s put a little more imagination into it, instead of having the city pay for everything.

With all due respect to SRS and our many brilliant engineers and scientists working to solve the global dilemma of thermo-nuclear type waste disposal, I have a simple suggestion: Contact Mattel. Anyone recently involved in the extrication of a Barbie doll from her complex, confounding, and downright physics-defying packaging will understand. Put the tritium in a Rapunzel Barbie box. It’s good for America.

Thumbs Up Augusta’s young entrepreneurs have done it again. The same people who brought the city Nacho Mama’s and Blue Sky Kitchen recently announced a new local history-

themed bar to be named the Still Water Tap Room. Slowly but surely, downtown is reviving, despite the conservative nay-sayers and proselytizers who would have it otherwise.

Thumbs Down The subject of water, particularly as it pertains to the state of Georgia, has been at the forefront of discussion and debate for some time now as lake levels continue to plummet and metro Atlanta looks to outlying areas for a liquid shot in the arm.

But despite water’s very real presence

For the engineers who designed the roads for Augusta, Ga.: Why in the Sam Hill did you build a turning lane on Washington Road toward Evans? That’s about the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard of. It’s nothing but an accident waiting to happen.

Augusta. Building a new conference and convention center in Augusta will cost over $50 million, one possible way to reduce the cost is to renovate the Regency Mall.

Augusta should explore this option before breaking ground on a new facility. Regency Mall has plenty of room to expand later as the convention center grows and has ample parking. The new convention center would be 15 minutes from downtown Augusta, Augusta Regional Airport and I-20. Augusta should look at Regency Mall. It has been closed for 10 years; let’s not let it stay closed another 10 years.

The Augusta Metropolitan Convention and Visitors Bureau is conducting a study to see if it’s feasible to build a convention center in

My sister is a teacher and in her school district they can’t even afford crayons, construction paper or even regular paper. But then the

on the radar screen, Gov. Sonny Perdue, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution reported, earmarked no money whatsoever in the coming year’s budget for resolving the state’s water problems.

Hopefully, we can drink a non-binding flag referendum.

county may spend maybe yet another $6 million (sales tax) for the Georgia Golf Hall of Fame that will do nothing but benefit Billy Morris and his cronies.

Can there be a more silly sight in Augusta than Billy Morris in a suit, tie and a cowboy hat?

Any idiot who would rationalize sending young American servicemen and women into harm’s way, because he thinks Dubya and his oil baron pals deserve insider favors on purchasing and reselling Iraqi oil, should be taken out and shot for treason. Let’s not fool ourselves. This war is about oil and who controls it in the Middle East, Bush and company or the Arabs, and if we have to lose a continued on page 6

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This is a response to a Whine Line entry from this week. Let me state emphatically that I am no fan of Charles or “Chump” Walker, but to suggest that Don Cheeks should be credited for the $8.6 million awarded MCG for the cancer center is ridiculous. That money was already earmarked for MCG before Don Cheeks came out of the closet and officially switched to the Republican Party.

I am extremely happy to hear that Mackenzie Clarke was fired from Y105. Y105 has not been the same since Dakota West left the show. Now, maybe they can start over from scratch.

It seems to me that we keep losing the wrong people in Augusta government! Instead of Dr. Bragdon needing to leave because she can’t make a living working for the county/city strictly and the idiots on the commission not letting her work two jobs to make ends meet, I would rather see the dummies on the Commission leaving town before Bonnie does!

Take this from someone who works in the broadcast business: If you don’t like what Y105 and the other station did with their morning shows, it’s only going to get worse.

Clear Channel and the other big companies care nothing about you, only profit. Delilah,

John Boy and Billy and other syndicated shows put local people out of work and take the “local” out of these stations. You might as well get satellite radio!

What’s up with all the cars parking on sidewalks in Harrisburg? The old Augusta Police Department used to write citations for this. Why does the Sheriff’s Office turn a blind eye to cars blocking sidewalks and forcing school kids and people in self-propelled wheelchairs out into the street? The reasons that people park on sidewalks are, they’re too lazy to park in back, and they are showing their contempt for the parking laws.

Why does Augusta State University need an athletic program? It’s a commuter school with very little local team support. If they win all their games or matches, what difference will it make? Education should never revolve around whether Joe Basketball player scored 20 points last night. All the money the school wastes on these “B team” coaches and administrators should be cut off and those funds should go to improving intramural and club sports, that real students want to participate in. It’s absurd that the student and athletic fees are almost the same as the actual tuition for one class! Scholarships should be for needy youths who want to learn business, nursing or education, not how to dribble up and down a court.

What’s all the narrow-minded fuss over SUVs about? If you’ll take time to notice, it’s the same as Bubba’s pickup, only it can be

Words “But you know who keeps bringing up the flag? The press. At every turn.”

— Georgia Gov. Sonny Perdue as quoted in a recent New York Times article on the flag issue. Just how gullible does Perdue think Georgians and people all around the country are? He made the flag an issue in his campaign against former Gov. Roy Barnes. He fired up the Confederate flag lovers on the idea of a referendum and he is the guy who is now running from the issue while the flag supporters are adamant about his promise to let Georgians vote on the flag. For Perdue to blame the press is wrong and misleading. He needs to look in the mirror.

“Mr. President, where is your mandate to take this country to war?”

— Former Atlanta Congresswoman Cynthia McKinney, as quoted by Cox News Service at a recent anti-war rally in Washington, D.C.

“It’s ridiculous. People ought to be terrified of the Ethics Commission, but they aren’t.”

— Robert S. Highsmith Jr., a former member of the Georgia State Ethics Commission, as quoted in The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, on the need to give more teeth to state ethics laws.

used more efficiently to carry up to seven people instead of just three like Bubba.

Nobody is on Bubba’s back about his pickup being wasteful and inefficient. They also don’t say Bubba is arrogant and has a bad attitude because he drives a pickup. What’s wrong with you people?

I was going east on I-20 the other day and guess what I saw? Someone pulled over by an unmarked police car with the driver in civilian clothes and best of all he wore a great big cowboy hat. Good job Augusta.

Our governor has proposed a clever way to quiet the flag protesters, raise taxes on alcohol and tobacco and create full employment for bootleggers and moonshiners.

Bob Young will be your mayor for the next four years. Get used to it.

To the whiner who replied that people who really think the war on Iraq is about oil, obviously you don’t think for yourself and just repeat what you hear. You’re a hypocrite.

You Republicans have it all. Bush Sr. can get caught on tape thanking Enron for all their financial support, and can do business with Bin Laden’s family, then when the heat rises over their corporate dealings, Bush Jr. terrorizes this nation with terror alerts.

As an Independent, my inquiry to both Republicans and Dems is, how can you believe you are thinking for yourself when you stand by an entire party and not take the time to research each politician in your

party? Afraid of all the skeletons you’ll find? Because if you had researched them you wouldn’t have been shocked by Trent Lott’s questionable comments or by Clinton’s extra-marital affairs. Yes, it is easier to just pick a party based on your wealth or prejudices. And pray for the strength in defending your party constantly to no avail, not that I don’t enjoy the mud-slinging back and forth.

Suburban Torture BY

JULIE

LARSON

J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

To the organizers of open mic nights and karaoke in clubs: Do you protect your singers from passing viruses and germs? Do you care? Sterilize those damn mics! And singers, sing into the mic, but don’t chew into it! And if you are having respiratory problems such as a cold, flu or TB, stay home and rest! I do not want your illness.

This is a public service announcement from a concerned, healthy citizen.

- Call our Whine Line at 510-2051 and leave your comments. We won’t use your name.

Fax your whines by dialing (706) 733-6663 or e-mail your whines to whine@metspirit.com.

The redefined 2003 Volvo S40 comes equipped with standard safety features some other cars in its class don’t even offer as options. Things like full-length Inflatable Side Curtains and a Whiplash Protection Seating System.

The very same standard features that make a Volvo a Volvo. We can also safely say it’s more stylish than ever, with a redesigned exterior that’s more agreeable to the eye.

The redefined Volvo S40 certainly has a lot to offer. Including of course, safety features other imports have yet to even import. Visit your local Volvo retailer or volvocars.com.

*MSRP of the 2003 Volvo S40 as shown with optional equipment is $24,350. Price does not include destination charge, tax and title. See your authorized Volvo retailer for complete details. ©2002 Volvo Cars of North America, LLC. Volvo for life™ is a registered trademark of Volvo. Always wear your seat belt.

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I’m worried about this year’s Masters with Martha, and Jesse coming with picketers and protesters. I’ve lived through other Masters Tournaments, which was bad enough, with rude out-of-towners. But this one is really going to give Augusta a black eye. I even suggest they have Harley Drew do the 3 p.m. show on WGAC where people will think we have a talented local talkshow host.

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Opinion: Commentary

Roe at 30: Behind Every Choice Is a Story

By Mary Beth Pierucci

J

an. 22, 2003 marks the 30th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, the Supreme Court decision that made a woman’s right to choose whether or not to have an abortion legal in this country. Few decisions are more important or more private than the reproductive choices we make. Because these decisions are extremely personal, most Americans support a woman’s right to choose without government interference.

It is important to remember that every individual choice is based on a story. We need only ask our mothers, grandmothers, aunts and sisters what life was like before Roe. Most have a tale, either their own or of a friend who faced the fear, shame and lack of safe alternatives. Ask those who worked in hospitals pre-Roe and they will tell you of the women who came in bleeding, with septic infections, often mutilated from back-alley or selfattempted abortions. Ask our sisters in countries where abortion is still illegal and they will tell you of the needless deaths of young mothers.

When I walk through the lobby of our health center on any given day I see more than just the faces of our clients. I see and hear their stories, which are the heart of this issue. For nearly 35 years, Planned Parenthood has been the place where tens of thousands of women have brought their stories. Women and their families need caring help with sensitive problems — family planning, contraception, and, if need be, legal abortion.

The pro-choice movement did not invent abortion. Throughout history, women have always known what little resources were available to bring on a miscarriage. Many of these methods were useful, some toxic, and others fatal.

Whenever a society has sought to outlaw abortions, it has only driven them into back alleys where they became dangerous, expensive and humiliating. When women feel it is absolutely necessary, they will choose to have abortions, even in secret, without medical care, in dangerous circumstances. In the two decades before abortion was legal in the U.S., it’s been estimated that nearly a million women per year sought out illegal abortions. Thousands died. Tens of thousands were mutilated. All were forced to behave as if they were criminals.

Planned Parenthood does so much more than ensure that abortion remains safe and legal. Our essential work revolves around pregnancy prevention programs, education, access to reproductive healthcare and emergency contraception – all proven to reduce the need for abortions.

Mary Beth Pierucci The abortion issue is really about the value we place on women in society.

Family planning, contraception and legal abortion are critical to sustaining women’s freedom. Women should make their own decisions about family, career and how to live their lives. The government should not do that for them.

Women should have the option of deciding when or whether to have children, not the government. Pro-choice advocates are not about to allow a return to the indignities and fatalities of the preRoe era.

There are people in our society who still won’t accept this. Some, including a number of our local legislators, argue that even victims of rape or incest should not be given a choice. Others have become violent extremists, engaging in a campaign of intimidation and terror aimed at women seeking abortions and the health professionals who provide them.

On the 30th anniversary of Roe, do not be misled by those who do not want women and families to have the dignity and freedom of self-determination regarding the most private of issues.

Most Americans support a woman’s right to choose without government interference. Make your voice heard so that our daughters need not return to a life without the dignity of choice.

— Mary Beth Pierucci is Director of External Affairs for Planned Parenthood of Augusta. The views expressed in this column are the views of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

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10 M E T R O S P I R I T

Opinion: Austin Rhodes

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ou can say what you want about deposed Georgia Governor Roy Barnes, but one claim you can’t make is that he didn’t get everything he really wanted. Last November’s election notwithstanding.

Barnes wanted to turn the education system upside down. He did it. Barnes wanted the old state flag to be lowered. It was. Barnes wanted to give blank checks to legislators who helped him. Charles Walker can tell you he did that too.

But all that Roy Barnes asked for came with a price, and when the bill was totaled after four years of bullying and Caesar-like megalomania, the cost was the governor’s mansion itself.

The benefactor of Barnes’ legacy of heavy-handed leadership was obviously taking notes. Rookie Governor Sonny Perdue is where he is as a direct result of Roy Barnes’ style. It is one thing to make change; it is quite another to do it loudly, arrogantly and deceitfully.

Shortly after defeating the emperor wannabe, Perdue was perusing the financial details of the state he had just won.

He had not been privy, even as a state senator, to the information now in his hands. What he saw scared the bejeesus out of him: A ledger balanced on the good fortune of undependable surplus, and income estimates that looked like they were put together by the Happy Valley Optimist Club.

Perdue knew one of two things had to happen: serious budget cuts, or serious tax increases. As a newly elected Republican, it was a no-brainer which way to go, right? Wrong. With the political grave of his predecessor still fresh before him, Perdue saw a better way.

Just days removed from his ascension, Perdue dropped the bombshell that made him the bane of every pundit and taxpayer from Blue Ridge to Brunswick: Tax increases were coming, and they were coming big.

Every editorial cartoonist in the state was lampooning him, and as far as political cover goes, he was a man without a country. No one wanted his ideas.

Republicans and Democrats were united in their outrage, and ordinary citizens were stunned and angry.

He sounded just like Roy Barnes, forcing unpopular plans down the throats of voters with no recourse. There were no

alternatives. Or so we thought.

Tuesday morning, the genius revealed himself. Meeting with over 30 state department heads, he began to turn the Titanic from its rendezvous with an iceberg.

Their projected 10 percent reductions in spending were not enough. He needed more. Enough, in fact, to eliminate most of the tax increases he had already announced were needed.

The entire state got a big, fat belly full of what tax increases meant, and before the first check was written, the proposal was going over like flatulence at a fancy dinner.

Fine, the governor says: Let’s cut the budget. More.

Had he come out with that suggestion first, he would have been decried by his critics as a cookie-cutter Republican, sacrificing services and welfare for the benefit of those money-grubbing taxpayers. Ah, but he didn’t. What he did was brilliant. He let the entire state simmer in the juices of repugnant tax increases, that we will likely see only in small, acceptable doses.

Now budget cuts will not be painful; they will be celebrated. Reductions in the state workforce? Hoorah! Cuts for pork barrel projects? Yippee! And hey, while we all love our beer and cigarettes, higher taxes on those items really don’t hurt as bad as the property tax increases, particularly because we choose to pay them or we don’t.

Perdue took the heat for about a week.

Now, he is turning to his department heads and the legislature to do the heavy lifting. When all is said and done, there will be a smaller state workforce, and far less taxation than one should fear in our current climate.

Perdue is doing exactly what Barnes was far too much of a know-it-all bully to ever try: Allowing the people to make the choice between two difficult things, and allowing them to take the credit or blame in the process.

For that move alone, he is smarter than his predecessor ever was. And by accomplishing the conservative goal in the process, less government, he is nothing short of a genius.

— The views expressed in this column are the views of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher. The archived Austin Rhodes columns can now be seen at www.wgac.com.

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SEE PAGE 22

11

Opinion: Insider

M E T R O

Governor Sonny Not So Bright

J A N

T

he first Republican (GOP) governor of Georgia in over 100 years is off to an extremely shaky start according to political observers in Atlanta, both Democrat and Republican. Gov. Sonny Perdue already finds himself at odds with Statehouse Democrats and some of the people who helped usher him into the governor’s chair.

First, Perdue began making enemies even before he was sworn in as governor. It is no surprise that Democrats who control the state House of Representatives are royally peeved that they must deal with a Republican governor, and a state Senate controlled by the GOP. But even more than that, the fact that the guv attempted to interfere with their selection of Speaker of the House incensed the Dems.

Initially, state Rep. Terry Coleman, DEastman, was heir apparent to former Speaker Tom Murphy’s throne. Then Perdue and other Georgia Republicans encouraged state Rep. Larry Walker, DPerry, to run against him. After a bitter campaign to sway fence-riding Democrats to vote for Walker, Coleman prevailed. Now, Coleman and the Democratic Caucus are united like never before. This could spell trouble for Perdue’s legislative agenda.

Secondly, Perdue, facing a $600 million-plus budget shortfall, infuriated his Republican base when he called for tax increases in the new budget he presented.

Any die-hard Republican worthy of a party membership card hates taxes. Yet, their Republican governor calls for a rollback of the homestead exemption which results in an increase in property taxes. Ouch! Did Perdue say he is a Republican? That’s right. He switched parties a few years ago.

Some GOP long-timers say he must still be thinking like a Democrat, especially since there is so much waste and graft in Georgia state government. The fact that Perdue is calling for a property tax increase and taxes on alcohol and tobacco infuriates GOP true believers.

There are some, including Austin Rhodes, (see column on Page 10) who think Perdue’s initial alarm bell about tax increases was part of a brilliant strategy to force Democrats and state department heads to cut the budget. These folks contend that Perdue never intended to raise taxes. That sounds like the governor’s spin more than anything else.

Republican insiders report that Perdue’s tax increase proposal was so overwhelmingly rejected by GOP legislators that

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$97 $127 Governor Sonny Perdue Perdue was forced to go another route. One GOP insider says that, while it will likely work out in Perdue’s favor in the long run, it will be the result of dumb luck rather than brilliance. As this person stated, “Even a blind hog finds an acorn every now and then.” Regardless of the combination of cuts and tax increases that make up the final budget picture, Perdue will be known for his tax increase suggestion for a long time.

Perdue’s third big problem is, of course, the flag. Perdue’s position on the flag, so staunchly articulated during the election, has turned to mush.

Throughout the campaign he emboldened supporters of the old state flag by agreeing that voters should decide if the Confederate symbols will be brought back and the new state flag discarded.

Immediately following the election he stonewalled on the issue, hoping it would go away. No way.

Now that he is elected it appears that he is not an enthusiastic supporter of returning to the flag of yesteryear, but flag supporters will not let him off the hook. He finds himself and the state embroiled in controversy surrounding an issue that has nothing to do with the real problems facing the state but will cost him time, energy and political capital.

Many of his fellow Republicans could care less about the flag issue and do not want it revisited. It’s bad for business and the image of Georgia. The problem is that those pesky flag people are like pit bulls and they have clamped down on the governor.

It’s a rough start for Sonny.

— The views expressed in this column are the views of The Insider and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

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MetroBeat Masters Mayhem

T

he city of Augusta doesn’t need Martha Burk to cause havoc during Masters Week this year.

Local officials and the media appear to be doing a fine job on their own.

This week, County Attorney Jim Wall introduced an amendment to a city ordinance dealing with public protests and demonstrations.

Currently, anyone wishing to hold a protest in Augusta – even one individual wanting to walk around with a sign – must request permission from Richmond County Sheriff Ronnie Strength.

The sheriff is then given as much time as he wishes to consider the request. If Strength decides to deny the citizen or group their request for a demonstration, it’s currently up to the protesters to take the city to court to overturn the sheriff’s decision.

Recently, when the city went before a federal judge in the case of the Augusta Commission refusing to give a business license to an adult video store off of Gordon Highway, the judge told the city that it needed to concentrate on cleaning up its ordinance as it relates to free speech issues.

The federal judge eventually ruled that the adult video store, called Augusta Video XMart, could open its doors for business.

As a result of that litigation, Wall told Augusta commissioners on Jan. 21 that he reviewed the city’s ordinance and is proposing to change the protest demonstration ordinance that is currently in place.

Now, did this have anything to do with the fact that Martha Burk and the National Council of Women’s Organization, as well as Rev. Jesse Jackson’s Rainbow/Push

BY STACEY EIDSON

Coalition, have announced that this April they will picket outside the Augusta National Golf Club in protest of its all-male membership?

Wall said the two are not related.

That may be a little tough for most people to swallow, but the fact of the matter is, the new ordinance Wall is proposing actually strengthens a citizen’s right to protest in Augusta – a point that appears to be lost on the public.

Under the newly proposed ordinance, citizens would no longer have to take the city to court if the sheriff denies them the right to protest.

Instead, there would be an appeal and judicial review process, Wall said.

If an applicant was notified that he or she was denied the right to protest by the sheriff, that person would have five days to file an appeal with the sheriff.

Strength would then have to notify Wall of the appeal and within 20 days the city would be required to go before a judge to prove why the applicant was legitimately denied a right to protest.

“So, the obligation is on us to institute an action to demonstrate to the court that the reason for denying the permit has got a valid basis,” Wall said. “It’s not that you disagree with what they are going to say or it’s not that you disagree with where they want to protest. You’ve got to demonstrate to the court that there is a legitimate basis for turning down that applicant.”

Augusta Commissioner Ulmer Bridges said, if that was the case, he didn’t understand why so many people were upset with the city and claiming that officials were try-

ing to prohibit Burk’s group from protesting.

“It sounds like to me you’re putting more stringent strings on the government as opposed to the demonstrators,” Bridges said.

“Absolutely,” Wall responded. “But the perception right now is to the contrary because of the timing.”

However, the proposed ordinance would ask protesters to provide more information to the sheriff when submitting an application.

The new ordinance would require a group consisting of five or more people to submit an application to the sheriff at least 30 days before the scheduled protest.

Also, in this application, the protesters would have to estimate the number of people expected to participate in the event, the date of the protest and the estimated length of time it will go on and the exact location where the protesters wish to demonstrate.

The sheriff would then have 10 business days to respond to the demonstrators’ application. If the sheriff failed to meet that deadline, the request would automatically be granted.

“All of these things are designed to protect and enhance the rights of someone who wants to protest, whereas the general sentiment and view has been that it is designed to limit it,” Wall said. “And that is not the case.”

But several Augusta commissioners, who have been hounded by both the local and the national press in the last few days, did not understand why Wall felt the need to bring the proposal to them a few months before the Masters.

“Well, Jim (Wall), all I can say is, you’re timing was real bad,” Augusta Commissioner

“

Lee Beard said. “There may be some validity in what you are trying to do here, but you picked the wrong time as far as I’m concerned.”

Beard said it’s important that the city understands that the country is watching what is going on with the Masters this year.

“This is a national event that we are talking about,” Beard said. “We may be talking about something local here, but I’ve gotten calls from New York and a couple of phone calls from other places wanting to know what this ordinance is all about.

“I would hate to be on national TV talking about how we’re coming up with something to stop the demonstration that is going to happen in April.”

Beard told Wall that he should have known that there would be repercussions if he introduces these changes now.

“We know perception is almost 99 percent of whatever is happening,” Beard said. “And there’s definitely a perception out there as to why this ordinance came about.”

Augusta Commissioner Willie Mays agreed, questioning why there should be changes in the ordinance now after it’s been working without any problems for years.

“Let’s not be coy about the timing of this ordinance and the publicity that surrounded the proposed changes,” Mays said. “I can remember the United States District Court ruling right in the city of Augusta, Georgia, in reference to the Ku Klux Klan.

“Now, if the ordinance on the books was good enough for the Klan to parade in Augusta, Georgia, and get the protection of law enforcement on a bright sunny Sunday afternoon down the main street of Broad Street, it

I would hate to be on national TV talking about how we’re coming up with something to stop the demonstration that is going to happen in April.

– Augusta Commissioner Lee Beard

”

should be good enough for anyone else.”

Augusta Commissioner Marion Williams said the commission should not be in the business of making quick changes to the city ordinance to protect a private golf club.

“If we pass this, not even the constituents of Augusta who do not agree with zoning can come in this room to assemble,” Williams said. “I’m not going to sit here and close my eyes to this. This is the most crazy thing I’ve ever heard of.”

Wall again tried to explain to the commission that the changes to the ordinance actually protects an individual or group wanting to exercise their right to protest, but he quickly realized it was a lost cause.

“I’ve been around long enough to know when you’re swimming upstream,” Wall said.

The commission voted twice on the amendments to the ordinance. The first time was to approve the changes and the second time was to deny Wall’s proposal. Neither vote had enough commission support to pass.

Augusta Commissioner Bill Kuhlke said it was just fine with him that the proposed amendments weren’t approved, even though he supported updating the ordinance. After all, he said, Wall’s proposal gave the protesters more rights.

“You’ve got two organizations that have said they are going to be in Augusta,” Kuhlke said. “They’ve said that they are going to demonstrate against the Augusta National because of their membership policy. But I think the spinoff effect of that is going to be devastating to the city of Augusta. ... So, frankly, keeping the ordinance the same places the burden on them if they get denied the right to protest.”

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13

HEALTH PAGE Take care of yourself. Let University help.

Knowledge and Exercise – Keys to a Healthy Heart

“HealthTalk” on WGAC-580 AM

Tune in Monday, Feb. 3, at 8:30 a.m. to hear Doris E. Tummillo, M.D., a boardcertified cardiologist and member of University’s medical staff, discuss the C-reactive protein test as an indicator of heart disease.

University’s Evening Programs with Physicians presents Family Life Series — Challenges and Changes Facing Families Today “Part I: Challenges and Changes Facing Adolescents Today” Featuring Alan G. Getts, M.D. March 11 Registration/dinner: 6:30 p.m.; physician presentation: 7-8:15 p.m.

“Osteoporosis – The Bone Facts for Women and Men” Featuring Douglas R. Phillips, M.D. March 20 Registration/dinner: 5:30 p.m.; physician presentation: 6-7 p.m.

Both of the above programs will be held in University Hospital dining rooms 1-3.

Seniors Club members: $8; advance registration: $9; at the door: $10 To register, call 706/736-0847.

Save The Date!

March 30 12:15-5 p.m.

University Hospital Levi W. Hill III Auditorium, First Floor BabyFest is a FREE, funfilled, educational afternoon designed for new and expectant parents.

Pediatricians and infant care medical specialists conduct classes and provide educational materials designed to answer your questions about parenthood and your baby’s first year.

For more information, call 706/774-2825.

M E T R O

Heart Health Programs during February – National Heart Health Month Attend these special programs with physicians to learn how you can take care of your heart.

To register for the following evening programs, call 706/736-0847.

Registration and buffet dinner: 5:30 p.m.; physician presentation: 6-7 p.m.

Seniors Club members: $8; advance registration: $9; at the door: $10 Reservations are required.

“Preventive Strategies for Coronary Artery Disease in 2003” Paul E. Cundey Jr., M.D. Feb. 11 University Hospital dining rooms 1-3 “Cholesterol and Medications” Kellie V. Lane, M.D. Feb. 20 University Hospital dining rooms 1-3

Make The Move to A Healthier You! Special offer with this ad – Bring this ad with you to Health Central before Jan. 31 and receive • FREE massage • One week FREE • No enrollment fee, which is valued at $99 After your first year with Health Central, memberships are on a monthly basis.

Visit Health Central, University Hospital’s COMMUNITY fitness and wellness facility, to see first-hand the benefits of membership, including among many yoga and tai chi classes, group cycling classes, sauna, steam room and a FREE personal fitness program developed for you by degreed, certified professionals.

Schedule a FREE tour of Health Central.

Call 706/724-4408.

Voted Best of Augusta for 18 years.

“Taking Charge of Your Health — A Program for Women of All Ages” Jacqueline W. Fincher, M.D. Feb. 27 First Baptist Church of Augusta, 3500 Walton Way To register for these two programs listed below, call 706/738-2580 or 800/413-6652.

These two programs will both be held at University Hospital dining rooms 1-3. Reservations are required.

Breakfast with the Doctor “Prevention: The Key to Heart Health” Abdulla M. Abdulla, M.D. Feb. 20 9-11 a.m.

Seniors Club members: FREE; nonmembers: $3

706/724-4408

www.universityhealth.org

Lunch with the Doctor “Leg Pains – Varicose Veins” Steven M. Roth, M.D. Feb. 26 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m.

Senior Club members: FREE; nonmembers: $5

If you are 50 or older, join University Seniors Club!

Review the wealth of benefits: -Health-related programs with physicians -Health screenings -Local and national discounts, including prescription drugs -Group travel -Special benefits if hospitalized at University Hospital New members, return your completed application with payment postmarked by Feb. 28, and qualify to win a FREE trip to Branson. Current members, who renew, return your completed application with payment postmarked by Feb. 28 to qualify for a FREE one-day trip to the Riverbanks Zoo and Botannical Gardens in Columbia, SC on April 25.

Call 706/738-2580 for your application.

University Health Care System has been named the National Research Corporation’s Consumer Choice Award winner in the Augusta area for the fourth consecutive year.

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Your resource for healthy living.

Healthy Adults Fresh Start Smoking Cessation Program Sponsored by the American Cancer Society Feb. 6, 13, 20, 27 6-7 p.m.

University Hospital dining room 1 FREE To register, call 706/774-8900.

Optifast® Weight Management Information Session Thursdays 5-6 p.m.

University Hospital Weight Management and Nutrition Center Registration is requested.

Call 706/774-8917.

Healthy Older Adults The following programs are held at the University Seniors Club, Daniel Village Shopping Center unless otherwise stated.

For more information or reservations, call 706/738-2580.

FREE Glucose Screenings FREE Blood Pressure Checks FREE Height and Weight Measurements Jan. 29 9 a.m.-noon No appointment necessary Lunch with the Doctor “Sleepless in Georgia” Presented by Bashir A. Chaudhary, M.D. Jan. 29 11:30 a.m.–1:30 p.m.

University Hospital dining rooms 1-3 Seniors Club members: FREE; nonmembers: $5 Reservation is required.

HEALTH INFORMATION , CALL

Healthy Women For the following classes or offers, registration is required. Call 706/774-4141 unless otherwise stated.

Introduction to Infant CPR Jan. 27 6:30-8:30 p.m. $5

FREE Mammograms Available Through a grant from the Avon Breast Cancer Crusade, University Breast Health Center offers a FREE mammogram and education for any woman 40 or older who qualifies.

Childbirth Preparation Class Six-week series Tuesdays, Feb. 4, 11, 18, 25, March 4, 11 Thursdays, Feb. 6, 13, 20, 27, March 6, 13 7-9:30 p.m. $75

Breast Self-Exam Class Feb. 10 5 p.m.

University Breast Health Center No charge

Refresher Childbirth Preparation Class Feb. 17 and 19 7-9:30 p.m. $50

Healthy Parents All classes are held in the Women’s Center classroom on the third floor unless otherwise stated. Registration is required. Call 706/774-2825 for information or to register for the following classes: Grand-parenting Jan. 26 3-5 p.m. $10

Log on to learn more: www.universityhealth.org

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14 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

A LONG SHOT: Area Municipalities Question Funding for $89 Million Arena

By Stacey Eidson Illustration by ScheerGame Sports Development, LLC.

A

chuckle. A sigh. A puzzled look.

These are just a few of the reactions from Columbia County, North Augusta and Aiken County political leaders when asked if their governments would be interested in footing the bill for Augusta’s newly proposed $89 million civic arena.

In November, two local business leaders and tenants of the AugustaRichmond County Civic Center – Williams S. Morris III, chairman of the Augusta Futurity and the National Barrel Horse Association, and Frank Lawrence, owner of Augusta’s arena football team – commissioned a feasibility study to determine whether the CSRA could support and afford to build a new, 12,000-seat arena located off River Watch Parkway.

According to the study’s research team, led by ScheerGame Sports Development, LLC, from Jacksonville, Fla., Augusta could construct the new $89.7 million facility, if the city gets a little help from its nearby friends.

“Our public neighbors – Columbia County, North Augusta, Aiken city and Aiken County – will be asked to participate, not only spiritually, but more importantly, financially, to make this a true, regional development,” Augusta Administrator George Kolb told the audience at a Nov. 22 press conference to announce the results of the civic arena study.

Kolb said, with the neighboring municipalities’ support and Augustans voting to extend the city’s 1-cent sales tax for a 10-year period in order to leverage future dollars for the project, the new civic arena could become a reality.

During ScheerGame’s presentation, a proposed funding chart was briefly flashed up on a screen. On this chart, under a category labeled, “Other Sources” was a line that read, “Columbia County Participation in Arena.” Right next to that line was the figure, $15 million.

State Rep. Ben Harbin, R-Martinez, said it was a good thing he wasn’t at the presentation because he might not have been able to contain himself.

“When I read in the paper that $15 (million) or $20 million was coming from Columbia County, I just laughed out loud,” Harbin said. “That was the first time I’d ever seen that figure. I knew that they had supposedly set up a regional commission with all the different people involved but I had never heard of any such commitment.”

Concerned that someone in Columbia County had promised money that the

county couldn’t afford to give, Harbin said he tried to find out the origin of the $15 million figure.

“I started asking around and I couldn’t find anybody in Columbia County that knew why the people planning the arena had put that figure in there or where it came from or who they got approval from to put it in there, if anybody,” Harbin said. “All I know is, no one talked to me about it.”

And that’s the disappointing part of the proposal, Harbin said. Few people in Columbia County even knew about the proposed civic arena, let alone that Augusta was going to ask them to help pay for the facility. In fact, Harbin said, he doesn’t know of one political leader from Columbia County who was formally invited to the November presentation of the arena study.

“If you’re going to include us in the presentation and ask us for $15 million, you’d think we’d get an invite to the meeting,” Harbin said, laughing. “I don’t think anyone knew about it.”

He just happened to find out about the meeting through a friend, a day before it was scheduled but, by then, Harbin said, he had prior commitments and was unable to attend.

Harbin said he personally doesn’t believe Columbia County should get involved with the project, primarily because he thinks Columbia County citizens are already providing Richmond County with enough sales tax revenue.

“When you go to any event over at the civic center, you see tons of Columbia County tags,” Harbin said. “We are already putting money into Richmond County by purchasing Augusta Lynx tickets, by going out to the stores in Richmond County and buying merchandise.

“We are already contributing to Augusta’s sales tax, so for us also to put more in, unless there is some revenue sharing in the deal, I don’t think it’s very smart for Columbia County to be involved. I really think it’s a long shot.”

Harbin believes that the supporters of the new civic arena will not only have a hard time getting money from surrounding counties, but he also said he doesn’t think many Richmond County voters are on board with the idea.

“They still have got a job selling it to the people in Richmond County and trying to lock in all of that sales tax revenue for 10 years,” Harbin said. “And what I hear in the community is, Richmond County voters aren’t real fired up about this because they’ve got a commission that they’re mad at. They are not happy with the way the government is running and they’re saying, ‘Why do I want to turn over all this money to a commission who can’t run what they’re already supposed to be running?’”

Ron Cross, the new chairman of the Columbia County Commission, said he had attended a preliminary meeting about the civic arena late last year and the next thing he knew he heard Richmond County was going to ask Columbia County for $15 million.

“The way we left the previous meetings, way back prior to the November elections, was that the consultant would prepare a presentation in the form of a book and mail it out to all the parties involved,” Cross said. “We have not received that book yet.”

15 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3

REQUEST FOR PROPOSALS “When I read in the paper that $15 (million) or $20 million was coming from Columbia County, I just laughed out loud. That was the first time I’d ever seen that figure.”

- Georgia House Rep. Ben Harbin Cross also wasn’t notified of the November presentation of the plan.

While Cross said that the Columbia County Commission has not formally addressed the issue and the door is always open for Richmond County to submit a proposal, he thinks it will be difficult for Columbia County to participate in funding the project because of the current limitations in the county’s sales tax budget.

“Our sales tax is down and we’ve had to delay our library construction out here by six months because of the slowdown in the economy,” Cross said.

In addition, Cross said that Columbia County is excited about its plans to create its own chamber of commerce, independent of Richmond County’s interests.

Therefore, he believes many Columbia County citizens wouldn’t support giving Richmond County $15 million so that it could build a new civic arena that would primarily boost Augusta’s economy.

“Those pushing this arena are trying awful hard to tie this into a downtown revitalization for Augusta,” Cross said.

“And of course, very few in Columbia County are going to have much interest in revitalizing downtown Augusta.

“Maybe if the civic arena was located on the county line right next to us, maybe then Columbia County could get more involved. But as it stands right now, I think it’s going to be extremely difficult for us to make very much of a commitment.”

North Augusta Mayor Lark Jones said continued on page 16

The Augusta-Richmond County Housing & Neighborhood Development Department (HND) will receive sealed proposals for furnishing Architectural and Engineering Services to the Department until 4:00 p.m. local time on February 14, 2003. Proposals must reach the above address by the deadline stated. A pre-proposal conference will not be held.

PROPOSALS MAY BE MAILED OR DELIVERED TO THE FOLLOWING ADDRESS: Augusta-Richmond County Housing & Neighborhood Development Department One, 10th Street - Suite 430 Augusta, Georgia 30901 HND often needs professional architectural and engineering services for discrete, small projects such as investigations, studies, reports, design of small projects, and related services.

The aim of this RFP is to contract with an A & E firm who will agree to be available to provide these services in a timely manner, thereby reducing HND’s cost and time for advertising and developing numerous Requests For Proposals, and generally to increase HND’s efficiency in obtaining professional services.

The purpose and intent of this RFP is to solicit proposals for a Term Contract for such professional architectural and engineering services to be provided on an “as needed” basis pursuant to Project Orders issued during the contract term.

The contract shall be renewable, at HND’s option, for a period of one additional year.

Copies of the Request for Proposals are available at the Augusta-Richmond County Housing & Neighborhood Development Department, One 10th Street - Suite 430, Augusta, Georgia 30901.

All inquiries for information should be directed to: John F. Kemp Phone: (706) 821-1797 Fax: (706) 821-1784 Email: jk7730@co.richmond.ga.us Rose L. White Neighborhood Programs Administrator

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16 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

continued from page 15 he understands how the officials in Columbia County feel, but he has even more of a concern about his city helping fund a project located across the state line.

“I did hear a couple of weeks ago that apparently somebody had checked into it and found that it would not be legal for us to give them money without the state Legislature getting involved to pass some sort of authority between both states,” Jones said. “I haven’t checked all that out, but there would be a lot of issues involved in this proposal.”

During a recent meeting of the Augusta Commission to discuss the city administrator’s recommendation to extend the sales tax for 10 years, Kolb said that, while Augusta would still be approaching Columbia County for possible funding, he was concerned that it would take too much time and effort to get money from any of the municipalities in South Carolina.

“The problem is, those governments would have to get permission from the South Carolina state Legislature,” Kolb said, “and that could be very complex and difficult.”

Since North Augusta has not received a

formal request from Augusta about funding the project, Jones said he’s “operating under the assumption that it’s not going to happen.”

However, Jones acknowledged he has received an invitation to a private meeting this week in Augusta to discuss the $89 million civic arena.

But that meeting, according to Kolb, is not being held by the city of Augusta.

“I haven’t heard of any meeting,” Kolb said. “Now, I’m not saying there won’t be a meeting in the future about the sports arena, but we’re not having one this week.”

Jones said he doesn’t mind discussing the project with anyone in Augusta, but one of the biggest concerns he has about it would be, if North Augusta provided Richmond County with money, who would decide how that money was spent?

“There would be a control issue,” Jones said. “If you put money into something, you want to have some element of control. And how much control should you have if you only put in 5 percent of the money?”

Jones said he would prefer Augusta to create a user tax that would be charged to anyone paying for a ticket to the new arena.

“If you put money into something, you want to have some element of control. And how much control should you have if you only put in 5 percent of the money?”

– North Augusta Mayor Lark Jones

“In other words, those who use it are the ones that pay for it,” Jones said.

That way, individuals from Aiken, Columbia and surrounding counties could help pay for the facility, rather than neighboring governments having to split up the cost.

After all, Jones said, there are several projects in Aiken and Columbia counties that would love to get funding from Richmond County to help support them, but he doesn’t see that happening in the near future.

“It’s one of those things where, with all the riverfront development that we’re doing, if it all goes according to plan, that’s going to benefit the whole CSRA,” Jones said. “We sure would like Columbia County and Richmond County to kick in some money to help us with that. ... But what you’ve got to understand is that, when you build something, it’s sort of a cooperative effort. When you build something, you build it to help the whole community without asking them for anything in return.”

At least North Augusta seems a lot more informed about the civic arena project than the other governments in Aiken County.

LaWana McKenzie, member of the Aiken County Council, was speechless when she was asked whether she thought Aiken County could help fund the new proposed arena.

“I know absolutely nothing about it,” McKenzie said, laughing. “I did not even know that they were making that proposal. I’m sort of in shock.”

Fellow Aiken County Councilman Charles Barton said he heard Augusta Mayor Bob Young was going to contact him, but that’s all the information he had received.

“The only thing I know is what I’ve read in the paper,” Barton said.

Ronnie Young, chairman of the Aiken County Council, said he also has been tentatively invited to this private meeting about the civic arena in Augusta this week, but that’s all he could say about the matter.

Those kinds of responses don’t surprise

Barry Fleming.

The former Columbia County chairman, now Georgia House representative from Harlem, said there’s not been a whole lot of information on the proposal released to area municipalities.

“There were a couple of meetings last year when I was on the board of (Columbia County) commissioners, but they were all preliminary stuff,” Fleming said. “The idea of surrounding counties going in together on projects is a new thing for the CSRA, but it’s common throughout the state.”

Fleming said there are several regional development authorities in Georgia and South Carolina that work on joint projects, such as airports and landfills.

“So, I think counties working together toward a common goal is a good idea,” Fleming said. “Now, the idea of a civic arena is a complicated one. There’s a lot of things we need to consider.

“I think most people would agree that the civic center that we have in downtown Augusta is too small to begin with. It doesn’t meet the current needs of the area. ... So, as far as Richmond County building a civic center I think it would be good for the community.”

And Fleming doesn’t have a problem with the fact that the proposed location for the civic arena is in Richmond County.

“Frankly, whichever county it is located in, you are going to lose valuable tax property, which will probably result in a tax increase,” Fleming said. “So, if it was across the border on Richmond County land, but Columbia County was a participating government, then it would really be better for us from that standpoint.”

However, Fleming did see the strong possibility of Columbia County voters objecting to the idea of handing their tax dollars over to a civic arena that the majority of control would be coming from the Augusta Commission.

“I think there is some concern, obviously, with some of the negative press that the Richmond County Commission gets,” Fleming said. “But there are some examples here of prior cooperation that have gone well between

17 M E T R O

“I think any time the taxpayers’ money is going to be spent and you are going to be joining in with another government with commissioners that your county didn’t elect, there naturally should be some concern and a lot of questions.”

– Georgia House Rep. Barry Fleming the counties. Right now, Columbia County and Richmond County have a water share agreement that has worked very well.

“Columbia County also has built a multi-million dollar project in Richmond County. Most people don’t realize it, but the Savannah Rapids Pavilion is built on Richmond County land, but it is owned by Columbia County under a lease process. So, that’s a prime example of the commissions working well together.”

Therefore, the idea of a joint-government venture in the CSRA is not impossible, Fleming said; it’s just something Augusta will have to work hard to develop.

But in the end, Fleming said, it’ll be up to the voters to decide the final outcome of Augusta’s civic arena.

“I think any time the taxpayers’ money is going to be spent and you are going to be joining in with another government with commissioners that your county didn’t elect, there naturally should be some concern and a lot of questions,” Fleming said. “But Columbia County has an intelligent electorate and if you educate them and give them information about it, I’m confident they’ll make a decision about whether it’s a good idea or not.”

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S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

18

Cemetery

M E T R O

theft

S P I R I T J A N 2 3

Photo: Brian Neill

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a Doggone Shame

By Brian Neill

t

hey had lain at the gravesite like two stately sentries, their pointy snouts at attention and their muscles and ribs rigidly set, ready to pounce.

As funerary art goes, the two slate-blue, cast-iron greyhounds residing on the Jordan/Gardner plot in Augusta’s Magnolia Cemetery were unusual, to say the least.

Apparently someone else thought they were pretty nifty, too.

During the Christmas holiday, someone stole the greyhounds — which, in their prone positions, stood about three feet tall and were

each thought to weigh several hundred pounds, along with two iron flower urns from the plot.

The theft surprised Carrie Adamson, a member of the Richmond County Genealogical Society who is considered an expert of sorts on local cemeteries and their symbolism.

“I don’t know how in the world anybody could steal them,” Adamson said, referring to the greyhounds. “I mean they were huge and they had to be cumbersome, if nothing else, and I would guess between the two of them they would have weighed a ton — they must have weighed 750 or 800 pounds at least.”

Rose Grabowskii, whose husband’s greatgrandfather, Arthur Grabowskii, married into

the Gardner family and is buried at the site, said the two greyhounds used to reside at the home of James Gardner, who was publisher of the defunct Augusta Constitutionalist newspaper. They were later moved to the cemetery.

Rose Grabowskii was dismayed by the theft.

“It’s really bad that someone would come in and do something like that,” she said, adding that, to her knowledge, there were no living members of the same Gardner family in the area.

An investigator in the property crimes division of the Richmond County Sheriff’s Department said there were currently no leads in the theft.

Grabowskii said she talked with an official at the sheriff’s department after learning about the theft through a news brief in the daily newspaper. The officer she talked with suggested that the theft might have been a prank by kids, and the items would possibly be returned, Grabowskii said.

Jerry Murphy, a records clerk who works in the Magnolia Cemetery office, estimated that the statues had been in place at least 70 years.

Murphy, after speaking with cemetery workers who reported the crime, surmised that the statues and the urns were stolen on different days.

“The first thing they (workers) noticed was the urns were missing ... The dogs were still

there, as far as they could remember,” Murphy said. “And then when they noticed the dogs were gone, they kind of came together.”

Murphy said the thefts occurred over the Christmas holiday. Even during the holidays, the gates are opened daily for visitors and families, Murphy said.

He added that Magnolia and the city’s other two public cemeteries have security, but it’s impossible to keep watch over them at all times.

Magnolia Cemetery, alone, is situated on more than 60 acres, Murphy added.

“We’ve always had security here, but there’s only so much you can do when you’ve got three city cemeteries,” Murphy said. “We have Regent Security who’s handling our gates and they ride through to make sure that everybody’s out (when the gates are closed).

But there’s only so much you can do.”

Murphy said he wouldn’t be surprised if the stolen greyhounds wound up in someone’s back yard as garden art.

Ruth Shapleigh-Brown says that’s all too common.

Shapleigh-Brown heads the Connecticut Gravestone Network and is also a member of the Greenfield, Mass.-based Association for Gravestone Studies. Through her Web site and seminars she gives, Shapleigh-Brown has been vigilant in educating the public about the rampant theft of cemetery items that has lately plagued the country.

She said items such as angels and gravestones are often destined for novelty placement in back yards, or to unscrupulous antique dealers, often on opposite ends of the country from where the items were stolen.

“With the education that I do up here, the general public is astonished,” ShapleighBrown said. “They can’t believe that this goes on and this stuff happens.”

In the past, Shapleigh-Brown said, cemeteries typically kept thefts of cemetery items and cases of graveyard vandalism quiet, either because they were embarrassed the crimes had happened to them, or because they felt that publicizing the incidents would encourage more of the same.

But several years ago, officials at Mt. Auburn Cemetery in Boston took a different stance, issuing a public statement after a number of wrought-iron gates inside the cemetery had been stolen.

“As it turned out, they were able to get back some of the gates because of the attention they got by finally saying something,” Shapleigh-Brown recalled. “So we all kind of got on that same boat and decided that we can’t win this war, but the first thing is making the public aware that, number one, it happens, and number two, you can’t expect the cemeteries to be able to guard all of this stuff, and number three, if you’re actually buying this stuff, you ought to know what you’re buying and you shouldn’t buy stolen stuff or anything that comes from a grave.”

Murphy said he has a hard time understanding why someone would steal from or tamper with such a historical asset as Magnolia Cemetery.

Unfortunately, he said, there’s no certain way to ensure it doesn’t happen again.

“Between the time we leave (for the day) and all, somebody can get here. On weekends ... we just can’t keep somebody here all the time, watching,” Murphy said. “Love to be able to, but it’s just not practical.

“It’s not that we don’t care, for sure.”

Anyone with information about the thefts can contact the Richmond County Sheriff’s Department at (706) 821-1020.

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“JOE MILLIONAIRE”:

20 M E T R O S P I R I T

SCENES FROM THE CLASS STRUGGLE ON FOX

J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

Photo Courtesy of Fox

N

obody ever went broke underestimating the American moviegoing public’s ignorance of all issues relating to class, as Caryn James pointed out in a recent New York Times article. In fact, as modern Cinderella stories such as “Maid in Manhattan,” “Sweet Home Alabama,” “Working Girl” and “Pretty Woman” have proven again and again, the idea that we live in a classless society is a myth Hollywood takes straight to the bank every week.

The conceit of Fox’s “Joe Millionaire,” as anybody reading this now knows, is that the women competing for the affections and assets of man-toy Evan Marriott are under the misapprehension that he is heir to a $50 million fortune, and not, as is the case, a $19,000-a-year construction worker. This fact will be revealed to the lucky winner at the end, when the “real” point of the show will be revealed: Is she in it for love or money?

Class-vaulting as a simple, fluid and relatively painless upward motion (much like a Tae Bo beginner’s box-kick) is a cherished American fantasy. All one has to do, the story goes (and goes and goes and goes), is meet a hot and kindly member of the wealthy, privileged, educated elite who is not only unconcerned with wealth, privilege and rank but longs to “keep it real” by marrying into the middle or working class. Rich American princes don’t care about social standing.

(They’ve had enough with “snooty” types!

They are up to here with “snooty!” All they want is a nice, simple, honest girl who loves them for them.)

But, as James’ article points out, this story has no basis in today’s social and economic realities. Or, to put it another way, it’s a crock. As fantasies go, a working-class woman is about as likely to marry into the American aristocracy as she is to win the Lotto. Which is why, although “Joe Millionaire” sounds good on paper, like just the thing to blow the lid off shows like “The Bachelor,” it doesn’t work in the way it was intended. (OK, maybe “blow” and “lid” are too strong in this context, unless a gentle exhalation is meant by “blow” and the “lid” is a Kleenex.)

It does, however, reveal a lot about what the non-rich have “learned” about the rich from watching TV. The TV rich are just like you and me — only they have funny servants performing 19th century functions and wear tiaras and gowns. They do not, unless they are villains, place any value on their breeding,

their education or their pedigrees. They marry only for love.

But the ultrarich — and in particular the idle rich — are different. (In one scene, Evan presents some of the girls with sapphire necklaces. “Have you ever had a sapphire before?” one of them asks another. If the difference between his imaginary status and theirs shifted and both the bogus prince and the humble Cinderellas went down a notch on the class ladder, they might ask each other, “Have you ever had a hot meal? Have you ever had shoes? Have you ever had all of your own teeth?”)

But, of course, this is not the French Revolution show. There’s only so much social inequity the viewing public can stomach, even if it is fake. When Marriott’s shocking net worth is revealed to the unsuspecting maiden at the end of the show, it’s unlikely that even the greediest contestant will admit to losing interest in him. But that’s because a reluctance to admit that one marries for social position is a distinctly middle-class value.

(Socialite Patricia Duff, famous for her alimony battles with her billionaire exhusband Ron Perelman, would probably display no such compunction.)

The truly interesting thing about “Joe Millionaire” is the picture it paints of American middle- and working-class ideas about how the idle rich live. Watching the “millionaire” test his future wife’s “character” by making the girls shovel coal into a steam engine and pick grapes in the freezing rain, I started wishing for a show in which the same girls vied for the assets of an actual scion.

Imagine the tests he could subject her to! Can she shop at Barney’s without being sneered at by salesgirls? Can she mistreat the help? Can she withstand the scorn of his friends and mother? How does she do in rehab? But “Joe Millionaire” floats along in a kind of Robin Leach-inspired fantasy, because both the heir and the gold diggers are blissfully unaware of just how exposed their bare classes are.

What kind of hot-blooded, messed-up American heir would hole up in a French château with an assortment of tarted-up office managers who lie about their ages, anyway?

Where’s the house in Ibiza? Where’s the party? Where’s the wounding ignorance of how the other 90 percent live? Where’s the blithe sense of entitlement? Where, for the love of God, are the drugs?

Carina Chocano writes about TV for Salon.

She is the author of “Do You Love Me or Am I Just Paranoid?”

BY CARINA CHOCANO

21

Dining Out

M E T R O

Spend Your Super Bowl Sunday at Stool Pigeons

S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

AFRAID O

n Jan. 26, Coach Jon Gruden and the Buccaneers will face Bill Callahan and his Raiders in the biggest, most-anticipated sporting event of the year: Super Bowl XXXVII. Plan to be at Stool Pigeons for Super Bowl Sunday. They are teaming up with 95 Rock and Budweiser to assure you of a good time.

95 Rock will broadcast live from 4 till 6 p.m., and Bud will stay all night to provide you with thirst-quenching libations and a truckload o’ giveaways.

Stool Pigeons is not just a place to go and relax; it’s a place to go play. General Manager Mike Somers describes an energetic, fun-filled spot where you can go to blow off steam and let it all hang out. Bring your friends for the Super Bowl, and come back every week for just about any sporting event and drink and food specials every day!

We’re talking food and sports here — how can you go wrong? Stool Pigeons has a whopping 22 television sets, which includes six big screens and one REALLY big projector screen. Depending on what’s going on, there can be up to nine games on at once — so you can go in, pick your spot, and be treated to a sports lover’s paradise.

The big games will be on every screen, so everyone can watch. “It all depends on the time of year and what’s on,” Somers said.

“This weekend we had the AFC/NFC Championships on nearly every TV in here, just as when the Falcons were in the playoffs.”

“We have an outstanding sound system,” he added. “For sporting events, this is the place to go, hands down.”

As a result, the crowds can get pretty lively.

And what was that about the food?

“We have a full line of pizzas, appetizers, and burgers. We also have some really good entrees, such as tasty grilled salmon, lemon pepper chicken, and amazing barbecue ribs,” Somers said.

Stool Pigeons has a great selection of drinks, with as many different draft beers as TV screens. Whatever your mood, whatever

TO your preference, you’ll find something you like. Just want a cold beer? In addition to 20 draft selections, there are over 30 different bottled beers available, both domestic and imports. There are several specialty martinis, such as the Granny Smith, Coop’s Cosmo and Raspberry Lemonade.

“My favorite is the Alligator,” Somers said. “It’s Chambord, Midori and Jagermeister, layered in a martini glass.”

These specialties are part of what makes Stool Pigeons a place the ladies can enjoy as well. Wednesday nights, from 9 p.m. till close, women can take advantage of $3 specialty martinis and Long Island iced teas.

And there’s nothing stopping women who like grabbing a beer and gathering around the big screen to hoot and holler with the boys.

There are specials every day of the week.

Monday night is Service Industry Night, with great drink prices for everyone who had to work all weekend. Karaoke is every Tuesday at 9 p.m., and open pool tournaments begin Wednesdays at 9. Don’t forget to check out their Red Bull weekends either.

Happy Hour is Monday through Friday, from 4 till 7 p.m. It’s Happy Hour all day every day if you’re drinking Bud or Bud Light draft — the price is always $1.50.

In case you were thinking Stool Pigeons is just about sports and drinking, it’s not.

They open every day at 11 a.m. for lunch.

After Super Bowl weekend, they will begin offering a different lunch special every day for just $4.99, a hot price to warm you up through a cold winter.

Stool Pigeons flew into Augusta just a couple of months ago, but the franchise has been around for years. There are Stool Pigeons in Myrtle Beach, S.C.; Charlotte, N.C.; Raleigh, N.C.; and Gatlinburg, Tenn.

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M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

Arts

& Entertainment

Who Pays for the Arts? B Y R H O N D A J O N E S

U

nder normal circumstances, The Metropolitan Spirit would be preparing a piece on Jazz at the Julian, a Masters of Swing event by the Augusta Jazz Project. It was to be a night of big band tunes composed by the legends of jazz.

But the Feb. 1 event has become a casualty in the struggle of arts groups to fund their projects.

The possibility of the concert’s cancellation prompted us to check the pulse of the arts community as a whole, and find out just where the money comes from.

The answer was not a simple one.

Brenda Durant, director of the Greater Augusta Arts Council, estimated that the GAAC writes about 20 grants a year. The day before, Jan. 15, had been the deadline for a grant from the Georgia Council for the Arts.

They are in competition with similar arts support agencies throughout the state, she said.

But, she added, though Augusta’s other arts groups had also sent requests to the state, GAAC was not in competition with them.

“I’m not vying for funds against the opera,” she said, by way of example. Two dance groups from the same city, however, would be competing against each other, and with similar groups from all over the state. Each discipline is rated by a different panel.

In addition to state grants, Richmond County gives to the arts, and so does the federal government, by way of the National Endowment for the Arts. “We received one (NEA grant) three or four years ago,” Durant said. “We have not received one since.”

Those are very difficult to get, she added, because the entire country is requesting those funds.

She said that, regardless of whom she’s approaching, there are two basic types of funding that she can request: a grant to cover general operating costs like salaries, utilities and office supplies, or a grant to cover the cost of a particular project.

But nobody wants to pay for pencils, she said. “It’s easy to find money to support projects. It’s hard to get money to buy your copies, to turn the lights on, to buy paper and pens for the office.”

According to Sandra Self, managing director

of the Augusta Symphony, the elements that go into getting sponsorship are not isolated: Each depends on the others. For instance, there’s a “domino effect,” she said, referring to the fact that it’s easier to get funds from one group if other groups are already supporting you. And if funding from one source falls through, the entire budget is affected.

But getting money doesn’t erase the hurdles of running an arts organization, Self said; sometimes that’s only the beginning of the challenge. “If you get the money, you’ve got to produce,” Self said. “But it’s very difficult to create new programming when you don’t have staff.” Yet, like Durant, she faces the dearth of operating grant money as well.

“I don’t know how they think programs run,” she said.

When a group depends so heavily on ticket sales and donations from individuals and corporations, they find themselves having to play Please the Customer and provide a lot of familiar programming. But creative people don’t like being confined.

“That’s when the government funding is so essential,” Self said. “For new work and risky projects.”

Yet grants make up only a portion of an organization’s budget. Self said grants are part of the budget called the Annual Fund. In addition to the grants, that part of the budget is made up of contributions from individuals,

Photo by Bruce Boulinear

22

From Augusta Ballet’s production of “Carmen”

corporations and foundations, and fundraising events. The Annual Fund makes up about 41 percent of the budget, she said. And that’s not the biggest portion.

The biggest portion, 44 percent, is made up of earned income: contracts, program advertising and ticket sales. All by themselves, tickets bring in about a third of the budget, she said.

Contracts are basically paid gigs, such as the concerts that Aiken Symphony Guild pays the Augusta Symphony to perform. “They raise quite a bit of money to bring in the Symphony three times a year,” Self said. In addition to that, the Aiken Symphony Guild pays part of the cost of bringing guest artists.

Support organizations such as Augusta Symphony Guild, Augusta Symphony League and the Symphony friends raise 10 percent.

The remaining 5 percent is from miscellaneous revenue like internet earnings.

“Your ability to grow has much to do with your board support,” said Self.

The Cost of Art The Augusta Symphony gives around 50 or 60 concerts a year. The budget for the 2002’03 concert season, according to Self, was $1,008,000. Cost of concerts vary, depending on the type. Pops and Masterworks concerts cost $46,500 and $40,000, respectively. They perform at the Grover Maxwell Performing Arts Theatre which has a seating capacity of 750, Self said.

“You can see why our corporations, foundations, individuals and government grants are so important,” she added. “As, if you divide our production costs by the number of seats, the average per seat ticket cost is $53.33. Our ticket prices are $15, $28 and $35.”

Pops concerts cost more, she said, because they are paying for guest artists and the rent is higher at the Bell Auditorium.

Publix Family Concerts cost $12,000 per concert; Discovery Concerts are $17,000; and chamber concerts cost $3,000.

Guest artists for the Chamber series and Discovery series cost anywhere from $500$2,000; Publix Family Concert guest artists cost $1,000 per concert; Masterworks guests continued on page 24

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Brenda Durant, director of Greater Augusta Arts Council continued from page 22 cost from $4,000 to $6,000 per concert; Pops guests cost $10,000 to $15,000 per concert.

“The cost of marketing and promotion, development and administration per concert is approximately $20,000,” Self said. “However, approximately 25 percent of this amount is traded.” For example, she said, the Symphony may trade sponsorships for services.

Augusta Ballet, according to Ballet Mistress and Administrative Assistant Bon Ellis, has an operating budget of around $580,000. A production like “Carmen” costs from $12,000 to $15,000, with “Nutcracker” running twice as much. Their per-show costs are comparable to those of Storyland Theatre, which founding Director Barbara Feldman estimates at around $9,000-$10,000.

Augusta Opera has a similar operating budget for the 2003-04 season, around $600,000, according to Managing Director Katherine DeLoach. Each mainstage performance costs $100,000.

In addition to their own performances, many of the performing arts groups also bring in guests artists, who have to be paid. “Also, we pay for their round-trip transportation, car rental and housing,” DeLoach said.

Art in an Injured Economy DeLoach said that, like many groups across the country, Augusta Opera felt the impact of 9/11. “Not contribution-wise, but we definitely did see our single ticket sales and our subscription sales decline that year. And I heard the same thing was true in other organizations as well.”

Grant money has been on the decline for years, though, she said. According to published figures from the Georgia Council for the Arts, funding is slipping away thousands of dollars at a time.

“Last year, the budget for general operating and project support grants, before the midyear reductions, was $2,706,737,” the report reads. “This year, the budget is $2,491,750.”

In Fiscal Year ‘97, the Council awarded topranked arts groups 9.95 percent of their previous year’s operating expenses. Last year, top groups received 7.45 percent. This year, it’s down to 6.47 percent.

Fortunately, arts groups know plenty of other ways to make money.

“I would say grants at the present account for probably the least amount of money that we receive in that category,” DeLoach said.

She said that, in the decade she’s been with Augusta Opera, she enjoyed a couple years during which funding was consistent. Yet the last eight, she said, government funding has dwindled. But they’ve taken it all in stride.

“Our budgets have remained the same over the years. Last year I think we were at $575,000, and this year our budget was $567,000. Next year it’s $576,000.

“Next year, we are putting on three full-scale opera productions.”

In September 1998, Dr. Elaine Feldman started the Millennium Club, DeLoach said, “to ensure the existence of the Augusta Opera into the 21st century.” The Millennium Club started with 19 single people and families, which is now up to 60.

“These individuals make three-year pledges starting at $1,000 per year. It helps us make our plans in advance. We can plan our season knowing that we at least have these pledges, I should say.”

Founding Director Barbara Feldman says that Storyland Theatre, which depends on its ticket sales to survive, has suffered a decline in audience since it started.

“For the first, I guess, 10 or 11 years that we were in existence, we were funded entirely by student tickets,” she said. “The audience has narrowed some over the years. We are not able to make ends meet like that anymore.”

She said their annual head count hasn’t dropped that much, but that it was enough to make a dent in revenue. Storyland audience is around 27,000 now, she said, which is down from nearly 30,000.

“Our expenses have gone up. Everything has gone up. We have gone for some grant money, and that has helped a lot,” she said. “We have expenses that we wish were being funded.”

And, yes, in addition to the loss of ticket revenue, they are feeling the grant pinch as well. “They (the government) don’t have as much money to give away as they did. It’s harder to get those grants and even if you do get them, you get less.”

In the past, Storyland Theatre has given thousands of dollars in scholarships to Augusta State University students. “But our ability to give back to the community has diminished considerably because we’re having

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“That’s always a danger with any arts group. If

the community does not attend, the cash flow erodes. And if expenses exceed income, the front door cannot stay open indefinitely, no matter what the quality of work may be.”

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The Future of the Arts in Augusta So how much danger is Augusta Jazz Project in? “We’ll keep the dance at the Julian Smith,” Volkmann said. “And we’ll keep our chamber jazz series.” The only thing he’s cut, as a matter of fact, is the Feb. 1 concert.

“I don’t want to make it sound like we’re going under but we’re having to cut back,” he added.

Yet, the possibility remains.

“That’s always a danger with any arts group,” Walpert said. “If the community does not attend, the cash flow erodes. And if expenses exceed income, the front door cannot stay open indefinitely, no matter what the quality of work may be.”

Colton said that the Ballet has had to consider canceling productions a couple of times, and even had to go through with it once. But closing up shop, or even a season, has not yet been an issue, she said.

“We’ve never faced that possibility. I truly believe that long after I’m dead and gone, Augusta Ballet will continue to be here and contribute to the cultural life of this community.

“Our organization is strong enough to survive and versatile enough to survive all the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.”

However strong or weak the arts groups are, your entertainment dollar is a hot commodity.

“In terms of funding, all of the arts groups are out there, and we’re not only competing with other arts groups,” Colton said. “You’re competing with the whole spectrum for the entertainment dollar – movies, athletic events, that sort of thing. There is just so much discretionary money that a family has.”

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trouble making ends meet.”

She doesn’t think 9/11 affected Storyland.

Not the case for other groups. Director Steve Walpert of Fort Gordon Dinner Theatre said his group is building back its strength, though it suffered a “significant” hit, but not because of any government art funding cutbacks. As a government entity, Walpert said, they aren’t eligible in the first place.

“We seek sponsors and additional sources of revenue. We are responsible for generating income,” he said.

Augusta Ballet’s artistic director, Zanne Colton, said her group lost a lot of contributions because of 9/11. “All of our thoughts turned to emergency services. The thought of supporting a ballet company when people were in need was difficult. And yet you know somehow I believe that, when we are in stressful times, when our vision seems to be most impaired, that is precisely when the arts are needed the most to offer a brighter vision of what mankind can be and also offer some solace and some comfort or even some diversion.”

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8

Days A Week

Arts

Auditions

“JOSEPH AND THE AMAZING TECHNICOLOR DREAMCOAT” will be presented by the Augusta Players’ Youth Theatre, which is holding auditions Feb. 2, 2 p.m., and Feb. 3, 7 p.m., at 1001 Walton Way. Roles available for youth ages 13-18. Come with a prepared solo from the show; accompanist provided. Chorus roles available for children 6-12; audition material will be provided. Rehearsal at tire preferred, which means dance shoes or tennis shoes and comfor table clothing. Call 826-4707 for more information.

“INTO THE WOODS” AUDITIONS Feb. 4-6, 7 p.m. at the Bectel Experimental Theater Hall in the Washington Center for the Per forming Ar ts. Roles available for 10 men and 13 women who can sing and dance. Call the Aiken Community Playhouse at (803) 648-1438 for information.

AIKEN CHORAL SOCIETY AUDITIONS Jan. 28, 7-7:30 p.m. at Smith Hall, next to St. Mary Help of Christians Catholic Church in downtown Aiken. For information, contact Antoine Cordahi, (803) 648-1252, or Mary Grefenstette, (803) 642-9256.

“A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE” is coming to the Aiken Community Playhouse in April, and auditions to fill roles for six men and six women will be held Jan. 27-28, 7 p.m., at Bectel Experimental Theater Hall in the Washington Theater for the Performing Arts. For more information, call (803) 648-1438.

AUDITIONS FOR “ART MEETS THE WORD: AN EVENING OF POETRY” PROGRAM: 10 local poets will be chosen to perform at the Morris Museum of Ar t’s First Friday program.

Audition held Jan. 29, 7 p.m. in the Odeum at Paine College.

Each poem must be original, take no more than two minutes to read/recite and reflect the evening’s theme, “A Celebration of Black History Month.” For information, contact Tania Beasley-Jolly, 724-7501, or Willie Thompson, 495-8428.

OPEN AUDITIONS FOR “COMPANY,” presented by USCAiken and University Theatre Jan. 28-29, 7 p.m., in the O’Connell Theatre at USC-Aiken’s Etherredge Center. Roles are available for a minimum of six men and eight women ages 18 and up. Rehearsals begin the last week of February; per formances are April 3-6. Prepare an upbeat song from a musical comedy; accompanist provided. Wear clothing that allows for movement. (803) 641-3305.

THE AUGUSTA CHORALE holds auditions for its spring season 6:30 p.m. Jan. 27 at Gilber t-Lambuth Memorial Chapel on the campus of Paine College. For information, call 481-8102.

AUGUSTA CONCERT BAND rehearses Monday evenings and is looking to fill vacancies on most band instruments.

Interested par ties should contact Ben Easter, (803) 2020091 or e-mail bandforaugusta@aol.com.

SWEET ADELINES PEACH STATE CHORUS OPEN REHEARSAL for singers each Thursday at 7 p.m. Held at 600 Mar tintown Road in Nor th Augusta. Contact Mildred Blain at 736-7740 or Mary Norman at (803) 279-6499.

Education

“COLLAGE AND WATERCOLOR: THE ADDED DIMENSION” adult workshop Feb. 1, 9 a.m.-2 p.m., at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t. 722-5495.

STAGE COMBAT CHOREOGRAPHY WORKSHOP offered to the public Jan. 24, 6-8 p.m., and Jan. 25, 4:30-6:30 p.m. Fee is $25. Call the Augusta Ballet at 261-0555 for information.

WINTER WATERCOLOR FLORALS adult workshop Jan. 25, 9 a.m.-2 p.m., at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t. Call 722-5495 or visit www.ghia.org for information.

ART CLASSES AND WORKSHOPS are offered year-round at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t. Classes and workshops are open to toddlers through adults and feature instruction in drawing, painting, photography, pot tery, weaving and sculpture. For a newslet ter or detailed information on registering for classes at the Ger trude Herber t, call 722-5495. The Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t also offers Educational Tours; for information, contact the Education Director at the above telephone number.

THE AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONSERVATORY PROGRAM announces music classes to star t in January: music fundamentals and music reading skills meets Jan. 28, 7 p.m.

Call 731-7971 for info.

ART CLASSES FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS at the Ar t Factory. Classes in visual ar ts, dance and drama are offered. The Ar t Factory also has a homeschool program and scholarships are available. 731-0008.

CERAMICS CLASSES at the Weeks Center Ceramics House in Aiken. Fees include one class per week and students can choose any class time: Mondays, 9 a.m. to noon or 6-9 p.m.; Tuesdays, 6-9 p.m.; or Wednesdays, 9 a.m. to noon. $30 per month. Call (803) 642-7631 for info.

USC-AIKEN MUSIC CONSERVATORY PROGRAM now open.

Students of all ages and experience levels welcome. Private lessons available for musical instruments and voice; instructors are USC-Aiken faculty and have at least a master’s degree in their per formance area. (803) 641-3288.

Exhibitions THE ETHERREDGE CENTER GALLERY at USC-Aiken will feature a ceramics exhibit by Renee Rouillier in the Upper Gallery and an exhibit of paintings by Bruce Nellsmith in the Lower Gallery through Feb. 1. (803) 641-3305.

FINE ARTS EXHIBITION BY DOROTHY WRIGHT Feb. 2-27 at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History. Opening reception is Feb. 2, 3-5 p.m. Admission is $3 per adult and $1 per child. Call 724-3576 for more information.

“THIRTY YEARS OF ROCK AND ROLL: PHOTOGRAPHY BY LARRY HULST” showcases images of such influential musicians as the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, Joni Mitchell, Bob Dylan, Jimi Hendrix, Stevie Ray Vaughan, Iggy Pop and more through the eyes of photographer Larry Hulst. The exhibit opens at the Augusta Museum of History Jan. 25 and runs through March 8. Eagle 102.3 hosts a live remote Jan. 25, 24 p.m.; the museum holds a panel discussion on rock history Jan. 30, 7 p.m.; Larry Jon Wilson performs at the museum

USC-Aiken’s University Theatre gives an encore performance of “Wax Work” Jan. 30. The play, penned by a USC Honors graduate, is headed to a theatre festival in Savannah in February.

Feb. 7 and Jeff Barnes performs as Elvis on Feb. 12; “Legends” concer t featuring a Beatles tribute band March 8 at the Imperial Theatre. For information, call 722-8454.

“RECENT ACQUISITIONS: 2002” features works by John Baeder, Herb Jackson, Philip Morsberger, Tom Nakashima, Margaret Ramsey, Lorenso Scot t, Juanita Rogers, Purvis Young, Eleanor Hancock Pryor and Gilber t Gaul. The exhibit will be on display at the Morris Museum of Ar t through Feb. 23. Call 724-7501 for more information.

“THE DOGGY IN THE WINDOW” animal photography exhibition by Ginny Southwor th will be at the Aiken County Historical Museum now through Feb. 23. There is no admission charge. Call (803) 642-2015.

MARTHA SIMKINS SPECIAL EXHIBITION at the Morris Museum of Ar t through April 20. Call the museum at 7247501 for more information.

AT THE MARY PAULINE GALLERY: Philip Morsberger and Dederick Ward exhibit through Feb. 22. Call the Mary Pauline Gallery for details at 724-9542.

“COLLAGE WORKS: MELINDA MOORE LAMPKIN AND LUCY WEIGLE” features pieces by two local ar tists. The exhibit will be on display at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t through March 14. Call 722-5495 for more information.

BRUCE NELLSMITH exhibits his paintings at the Etherredge Center Lower Gallery through Feb. 1. Call (803) 641-3305.

CIVIL WAR ARTIFACTS of the First Independent Brigade will be on display at the Euchee Creek Branch Library in January. Call 556-0594.

THE ARTWORK OF NANCY BANNISTER is on display at the Raging Bull, 828 Broad St., through the end of February.

Bannister specializes in landscape and abstract ar t, as well as interior/ex terior murals. Call 722-0444 for more information.

DANIEL HAYES will exhibit his ar twork at the Gibbs Library in January. For information, call 863-1946.

AT THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART: “Ware’s

Folly: An Architectural Perspective” is in the First-Floor Gallery at Ware’s Folly through Feb. 21; “Creative Expression” is in the Ware’s Folly First Floor Gallery through Feb. 21; “Ar tist-in-Residence: Craig-Houghton Elementary School Students Create” on display through Feb. 14. Call 722-5495 for more information.

Dance

STARLIGHT BALL AND DINNER DANCE Jan. 25, 7-11 p.m., at the Ballroom Dance Center in Evans. Dress is semi-formal.

Tickets are $15 per person; call 854-8888 for reservations.

AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE UNITED STATES AMATEUR BALLROOM DANCERS ASSOCIATION holds a dance the first Saturday of each month, from 7:15 to 11 p.m. Cost is $7 for members and $10 for non-members. Held at the BPOE Facility on Elkdom Cour t. Contact Melvis Lovet t, 733-3890, or Jean Avery, 863-4186, for information.

THE JIVING LINDY HOPPERS per form at the Newberry Opera House Jan. 27. The H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken hosts a bus trip, leaving at 6 p.m., to see the show. Pre-registration is required. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

BALLROOM DANCE CLASSES March 11-April 22 at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken. Cost is $40 per couple and registration is accepted in pairs only. Call (803) 642-7631 for registration information.

SQUARE DANCE CLASSES: Beginning classes run Jan. 27March 31 and intermediate classes run April 14-June 16.

Call (803) 642-7631 for more information.

CSRA/AUGUSTA BOGEY-WOOGIE DANCE AND SOCIAL GROUP holds a monthly dance every third Saturday of the month, star ting at 7:30 p.m. There are also meetings every Sunday at 4 p.m. at the Salsa Ruedo Casino and every Wednesday at 7:45 p.m. Men are especially encouraged to at tend. For information, phone 650-2396 or 736-3878.

SINGLES DANCE each Saturday night from 8-11 p.m. sponsored by the Christian Social Organization for Single Adults.

Held at Westside High School. Tickets $5 for members, $7

Music VIGNETTES FROM “LA RECHERCHE” will be performed by The Voices of Franklin Jan. 26 at the Morris Museum of Ar t as par t of the Music at the Morris performance series. Held at 2 p.m. in the museum auditorium; free admission. 724-7501.

“LION IN WINTER” Jan. 24-26, 31 and Feb. 1 at the Aiken Community Playhouse’s new theatre in the Washington Center for the Per forming Ar ts. Call (803) 648-1438 for information and reservations.

NOW ON SALE: Tickets for “Les Miserables” Feb. 1116 at the Bell Auditorium. Call TicketMaster at 8287700 or visit www.ticketmaster.com.

“MADAME BUTTERFLY” will be per formed by the London City Opera at 8 p.m. Jan. 25 at USC-Aiken’s Etherredge Center, as par t of the University’s Cultural Series. Call the box of fice at (803) 641-3305.

Attractions

AUGUSTA SYMPHONY ENCORE CHAMBER SERIES CONCERT Jan. 25, 8 p.m. at Unitarian Universalist Church on Walton Way Ex t. Tickets are $15 for general admission and $7.50 for students. Call 826-4705.

THE BOYHOOD HOME OF WOODROW WILSON: Circa 1859 Presbyterian manse occupied by the family of President Woodrow Wilson as a child during the Civil War and Reconstruction. Original and period antiques, restored house, kitchen and carriage house. 419 Seventh Street.

Open 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Tues.-Sat. Tours available; groups of 10 or more by appointment only. Admission is $5 adults, $4 seniors, $3 students under 18 and free for ages five and under. 722-9828.

USC-AIKEN FACULTY ARTIST RECITAL featuring Katherine Brooks and Richard Maltz, percussion; Katie Taylor, harp; and James Bennet t, piano. Held Jan. 23, 7 p.m. at USC-Aiken’s Etherredge Center. Call the box of fice at (803) 641-3305 for more information.

“SIDE BY SIDE BY SONDHEIM” will be per formed by the Augusta Opera Jan. 23 and 25 at 7:30 p.m. with a matinee per formance Jan. 26 at 3 p.m. Held at the Imperial Theatre. Tickets are $12-$40, with group, student and senior discounts available. Call the Augusta Opera at 826-4710 for information.

TUESDAY’S MUSIC LIVE CONCERT SERIES: All performances in the concer t series held at noon at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church. Concer ts are free; optional catered lunch is $7 per person. 2002-2003 season schedule is as follows: Feb. 4, Lindsey McKee and Keith Shafer; Feb. 18, Cowboy Envy; March 4, The Augusta Children’s Chorale; March 18, Kari Gaf fney and Jef f Williams. 722-3463.

COMMUNITY HEALING MEDITATION DRUMMING CIRCLE hosted every third Monday of the month by IDRUM2U, the Not Gaddy Drumming Studio. Held 7-9 p.m. at the G.L. Jackson Conference Center, 1714 Nor th Leg Cour t. Fee is $5 or a donation of canned goods for the Golden Harvest Food Bank. All are welcome and drums will be available to rent. For info, phone the Not Gaddy Drumming Studio, 228-3200.

Theater “GOOD MEASURE, RUNNING OVER” dinner theatre per formance about the life of Emily Tubman Feb. 6 at the Augusta Museum of History. Two per formances will be held, one at 6:30 p.m. and one at 8 p.m.

Advance tickets and reservations are required; register by Jan. 31. Cost is $25 per person. For information, call 724-0436 or 722-8454.

AN EVENING WITH DAVID COPPERFIELD Feb. 4 at the Bell Auditorium. Shows are at 6 p.m. and 9 p.m.

Tickets are $34-$48 for adults and $29-$43 for children. For tickets, call 828-7700 or visit www.ticketmaster.com.

“MOMMA AND ME” stage show featuring Vickie Lawrence at the Newberry Opera House Feb. 23. Bus trip leaves from the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken at 1 p.m. Registration is required by Feb. 6. Call (803) 642-7631 for details.

“WAX WORK” encore per formance presented by USC-Aiken’s University Theatre Jan. 30, 8 p.m. at the Etherredge Center. The play, writ ten by USC Honors College graduate Sarah Hammond, has been selected to par ticipate in the Kennedy Center/American College Theatre Region IV Festival in Savannah, Ga., Feb. 7 at 8 p.m. For information and tickets, call (803) 641-3305.

“AS YOU LIKE IT” will be per formed by the National Players Jan. 24, 2 and 7:30 p.m., and Jan. 25, 7:30 p.m., at the Ma xwell Per forming Ar ts Theatre.

Presented as par t of Augusta State University’s Lyceum Series. Call 737-1609 for information.

“THE SOUND OF MUSIC” comes to the Abbeville Opera House Jan. 24-25 and 31 and Feb. 1, 7-8 and 14-15. Matinee per formances held Jan. 25 and Feb. 1, 8 and 15. Call (864) 459-2157 for ticket information.

“TARTUFFE,” presented by the National Players, will be at the ASU Per forming Ar ts Theatre Jan. 23, 2 and 7:30 p.m., as par t of ASU’s Lyceum Series. Tickets are $8 general admission and $6 special admission for senior citizens and area students for the evening performance and $6 general admission and $4 special admission for the af ternoon per formance; ASU students, faculty and staf f are admit ted free. 737-1609.

DAVIDSON FINE ARTS SCHOOL DESSERT THEATRE Jan. 23-24, 7 p.m., in the Beverly J. Barnhar t Theatre.

Tickets are $8 adult, $6 senior citizens and children under 5 and $4 for Davidson Fine Ar ts students. Call 823-6924, ex t. 124 for more information.

AUGUSTA GOLF & GARDENS OF THE GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME features beautiful display gardens, as well as bronze sculptures of some of golf’s greatest masters.

Available for rent for a variety of functions. Group discount rates available. Closed Mondays; open from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

Tues.-Sat.; open from 1 to 5 p.m. on Sunday. Admission is $5.50 for adults; $4.50 for students, seniors and military; $3.50 for children (4 to 12); free for children 3 and under.

Sundays are two for one with a Super Sunday coupon.

Annual garden memberships are available. Call 724-4443 or 1-888-874-4443. Also, visit their Web site at www.gghf.org.

FORT DISCOVERY/NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER: Children and adults alike can immerse themselves in the wonders of science through live demonstrations, vir tual realities, Starlab, KidScape and more than 270 hands-on exhibits.

General Admission: $8 for adults; $6 for children, seniors and active military. Group rates available. Half-price admission daily af ter 3 p.m. Operating hours: Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday, noon-5 p.m. Call 821-0200, 1-800-325-5445 or visit their Web site at www.NationalScienceCenter.org.

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REDCLIFFE STATE HISTORIC SITE: 1859 mansion of S.C. Governor James Henry Hammond, held by the family for three generations until 1975. Hours are 9 a.m.-6 p.m., Thursday-Monday on the grounds. House tours are noon-3 p.m. by appointment. Closed Tuesday and Wednesday.

Admission to the grounds is free. Fee for house tours is $3 for adults and children ages 6 to 17. For more information, call (803) 827-1473. 181 Redcliffe Road, Beech Island.

SACRED HEART CULTURAL CENTER is offering tours of its 100-year-old building. Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m. $1 per person, children free. 826-4700.

HISTORIC COTTON EXCHANGE WELCOME CENTER: Open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sun. 1-5 p.m. Riverwalk. Free.

724-4067.

THE EZEKIEL HARRIS HOUSE: Deemed “the finest 18th century house surviving in Georgia” by the “Smithsonian Guide to Historic America.” Open Saturday, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. General admission is $2; senior admission is $1 and children get in for 50 cents. For more information, call 724-0436.

Museums AN EVENING WITH SOUTHERN FOOD AUTHOR JOHN EGERTON Jan. 30, 7 p.m. at the Morris Museum of Ar t.

Eger ton will give a lecture and sign his book “Cornbread Nation I.” Reception featuring Southern dishes will follow; reservations are required and the fee is $10 for members, $12 for nonmembers. 724-7501.

AT THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY: January’s film is “The Founding of Georgia.” February’s film will be “The Morehouse Men.” Films play continuously in the History Theatre and are free with admission. Feb. 5 Brown Bag History Series features talk on “Emily Tubman: Benefactress, Christian, Humanitarian.” Free for members and $2 for non-members; reservations required. Bring your lunch and the museum provides a beverage and dessert. For more information, call 722-8454.

THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART in Ware’s Folly exhibits works by local and regional ar tists. Ar t classes, workshops and other educational programming for children, youth and adults are held in the Walker-Mackenzie Studio. Ware’s Folly galleries open Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Thursday, 10 a.m.-7 p.m.; and Saturday by appointment only. The Walker-Mackenzie Studio gallery is open Tuesday-Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Admission is free, but a donation of $2 for adults and $1 for children and seniors is encouraged. Call 722-5495 for more info.

THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY hosts permanent exhibition “Augusta’s Story,” an award-winning exhibit encompassing 12,000 years of local history.

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M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

Discovery Gallery, where kids can learn 28 Children’s about history in a hands-on environment. The museum

THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. and every Wednesday evening from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. at the Pet Center located behind the GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Rd. 261-PETS.

also shows films in the History Theatre and hosts a variety of programs. Located at 560 Reynolds Street.

Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sunday 1-5 p.m. Admission is $4 adult, $3 seniors, $2 kids (6-18 years of age) and free for children under 6. Free admission on Sundays. Call 722-8454 or visit S www.augustamuseum.org for more information.

M E T R O

Out of Town “SAINT LUCY’S EYES” will be presented by the Alliance Theatre Company Feb. 5-March 9 at the Woodruff Ar ts Center in Atlanta. Tickets are $17-$46; call (404) 733-5000.

P I R THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART hosts exhibitions and I special events year-round. Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 T a.m.-5 p.m. and Sundays, noon-5 p.m. Closed on

“WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE: MAURICE SENDAK IN HIS OWN WORDS AND PICTURES” exhibit at the Richland County Public Library in Columbia, S.C., Feb. 3-May 18.

(803) 799-9084.

Mondays and major holidays. 1 Tenth Street, Augusta.

J Call 724-7501 or visit www.themorris.org for details.

A N

THE MUSEUM OF LAUREL AND HARDY OF HARLEM,

2 GEORGIA features displays of various Laurel and Hardy 3 memorabilia; films also shown. Located at 250 N.

“ROOM SERVICE” presented by Class Act Theatre in Mariet ta, Ga., Jan. 31-March 3. Tickets are $15 adult, $13 senior and $12 children. Call (770) 579-3156.

Louisville Street in downtown Harlem. Open 1-4 p.m.

2 Thursday-Monday. For more information, call 556-3448.

0 0 LUNCH AT NOON LECTURE SERIES held the second 3

Wednesday of every month at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Call the museum at 724-3576 for more information.

The Aiken Center for the Arts hosts Antiques in the Heart of Aiken Jan. 30-Feb. 2.

(803) 641-9094.

Special Events

ets required for admission. Recommended donation is $5 for civilians. Call 791-4683 or 791-5634.

AFRICAN-AMERICAN HISTORY CONFERENCE Feb. 3-7 at Paine College. For more information, call 821-8217.

BLACK HISTORY MONTH ACTIVITIES AT FORT DISCOVERY in February: “African Skies” program in the StarLab Planetarium provides visitors the oppor tunity to see the constellations as interpreted through African legend and lore; “Black Scientists and Inventors” exhibit on the contributions and achievements of African-American scientists and inventors. Call 821-0224 for details.

“AROUND THE DAY IN 80 WORLDS” FILM FESTIVAL at USC-Aiken. “Amélie” will be shown at 6 p.m. on Jan. 28 and 31. Admission is $2 for the general public and free for students, faculty and staf f of USC-Aiken.

Call (803) 641-3448 for information.

JASON PROJECT PUBLIC DAY Feb. 1 at For t Discovery features family-oriented activities, workshops, live broadcasts hosted by oceanographer and underwater explorer Rober t Ballard and more. Free with paid general admission. 821-0607.

GEORGIA HERITAGE CELEBR ATION Feb. 6-7, 9 a.m.5 p.m., at Augusta Golf and Gardens. For more information, call 724-4443 or 724-0436.

BOOK SIGNING AT BORDERS BOOKS AND MUSIC Jan. 25. From 2-4 p.m., Stan Byrdy signs his book “Augusta and Aiken in Golf’s Golden Age.” 737-6962.

SWAMP SATURDAY Feb. 1, 9:30 a.m., at Phinizy Swamp Nature Park. Volunteer-led tour through the park. Wear weather-appropriate outerwear and comfor table shoes, and bring insect repellent, sunscreen, cameras and binoculars. Free, but donations are welcome. Call 828-2109 for information.

NATIONAL PR AYER BREAKFAST Feb. 5 at For t Gordon’s Gordon Club features Atlanta Braves pitcher John Smoltz as the speaker. Open to all; advance tick-

UNVEILING AND DEDICATION OF STATUE bearing the likeness of General James Edward Oglethorpe Feb. 6, 11:30 a.m. at The Augusta Common. A luncheon to honor a delegation from The Friends of Oglethorpe in Godalming and Cranham, England, to follow at the Radisson River front Conference Center. Luncheon is $30 per person and reservations must be made by Feb. 3. Call 724-0436 for information.

ITALIAN-AMERICAN CLUB OF THE CSR A’S 19TH ANNUAL PASTA FESTIVAL Feb. 7 at the Hellenic Center, Greek Or thodox Church. Lunch is available from 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and dinner is available from 4:308 p.m. Tickets are $6.50 for adults and $3.50 for children under 12. For information, call 863-3308.

ANTIQUES IN THE HEART OF AIKEN Jan. 30-Feb. 2 at the Aiken Center for the Ar ts. Jan. 30, 7-9 p.m., is a preview par ty; tickets are $95 per couple or $50 per person. The show is open 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Jan. 31-Feb. 1, and 1:30-5 p.m. Feb. 2, with a brunch that day from noon until 1:30 p.m. Admission is $5, good for the duration of the show. (803) 641-9094.

“FIRESIDE CHAT WITH THE MAESTRO” Jan. 30 is par t of the Augusta Symphony’s Por t folio of Par ties.

Call 826-4705 for an information packet.

WATERFOWL WALK Jan. 25, 9 a.m.-noon at Phinizy Swamp Nature Park. Search for the park’s wintering water fowl. Cost is $3 for members and $5 for nonmembers; register by Jan. 24. 828-2109.

“SUCCESS COLUMBIA COUNTY STYLE” event, hosted by the Augusta Metro Chamber of Commerce Jan. 27, 5-7 p.m. at John Deere Commercial Products in Grovetown. Free to members of the Augusta Metro Chamber of Commerce. Call 651-0018 for information.

24TH ANNUAL AUGUSTA FUTURITY Jan. 24-Feb. 1.

Tickets for individual events run from $6-$15.50 for adults and $2-$5 for children under 13. General admission gold tickets available for $40. Tickets can be obtained through TicketMaster, by phone at 8287700, on www.ticketmaster.com or at all TicketMaster

Augusta Opera Presents

Jan. 23 & 25, 2003 - 7:30pm

Imperial Theater Ticket Hotline:

Student & Senior Discounts available

2003 CULLUM LECTURE SERIES at Augusta State University: The title of this year’s series is “Frontiers in Motion: U.S.-Latin American and Caribbean Borderlands.” Jan. 28 showing of “Guantanamera” at 11:30 a.m. and 7 p.m. in Butler Lecture Hall. On Feb. 4, Luis Mar tinez-Fernandez gives a lecture entitled “Geography — Will it Absolve Cuba?” at 11:30 a.m. and 7 p.m. in Butler Lecture Hall. Admission to all Cullum events is free. For more information, visit www.aug.edu/library/cullum2003.

AUGUSTA BALLET LEXUS R AFFLE to celebrate the 40th Anniversary of the Augusta Ballet. A Lexus SC 430 coupe will be raf fled of f during the intermission of the Feb. 8 “Romeo and Juliet” per formance at the Imperial Theatre. Tickets are $100 and may be purchased by calling 261-0555.

JANUARY FILM SERIES at Headquar ters Library, Tuesdays at 6:30. Free admission. Jan. 28 showing of “The 400 Blows.” Call 821-2600.

MCDUFFIE FRIENDS OF ANIMALS holds pet adoptions each Saturday, 1-3 p.m. at Superpetz on Bobby Jones Expressway. Call 556-9090 or visit www.pet finder.com.

COLUMBIA COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. and every Sunday from 1 to 4 p.m. at PetsMar t. For more info, call 860-5020.

RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL AND AUGUSTA ANIMAL RESCUE FRIENDS holds pet adoptions at Superpetz off Bobby Jones Expressway every Sunday from 1 to 4 p.m.

Call AARF at 364-4747 or visit www.aar f.net. Adoptions also held at the Richmond County Animal Control Shelter, Tues. through Sun., 1-5 p.m. Call the shelter at 790-6836.

LOW-COST RABIES VACCINATIONS: Augusta-Richmond County Animal Control holds low-cost rabies vaccination clinics the four th Sunday of every month for privately owned pets. $8 per animal. 1 p.m. at Superpetz. Dogs must be on a leash and cats in a carrier. Puppies and kit tens must be three months old and current for all vaccinations. Schedule subject to change, so please call 790-6836 to verify dates and times.

ADOPTION INFORMATION SESSION at the Independent Adoption Center in Tucker, Ga., Feb. 1. Held 9:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. Make reservations by calling 1-800-385-4016.

“SHAKESPEARE’S R&J” will be presented on the Her tz Stage in Atlanta by the Alliance Theatre Company Jan. 24March 2. Tickets are $25-$31, with discount rates for groups of 10 or more, and are available by calling (404) 733-5000 or online at www.alliancetheatre.org.

THE HIGH MUSEUM OF ART’S FOLK ART AND PHOTOGRAPH GALLERIES host two exhibitions Jan. 25-Aug. 9: “Land of Myth and Memory: Clarence John Laughlin and Photographers of the South” and “Faces and Places: Picturing the Self in Self-Taught Ar t.” Call (404) 577-6940.

THE ATLANTA TURKEY HUNTING, FISHING AND OUTDOOR SHOW Jan. 31-Feb. 2 at the Atlanta Expo Center. Admission is $7 for adults, $4 for seniors and kids 6-12 and free for kids under 6. For information, contact Doug Rithmire, (770) 787-7887 or drithmire@gwf.org.

RINGLING BROTHERS AND BARNUM & BAILEY CIRCUS through Jan. 26 at the Carolina Center in Columbia, S.C. Tickets are $14-$33 and can be purchased from the box office, by phone at (803) 783-2222 or at TicketMaster outlets.

AT THE GEORGIA MUSEUM OF ART in Athens, Ga., through March 23: “There Is No Eye: Photographs by John Cohen” and “Visualizing the Blues: Images of the American South, 1862-1999.” Call (706) 542-4662 for information.

AT THE GEORGIA NATIONAL FAIRGROUNDS AND AGRICENTER in Perry, Ga.: HQHA Quar ter Horse Show Jan. 2426, (770) 227-2159. Also, tickets are now on sale for the Georgia National Rodeo, Feb. 20-22. Call (478) 987-3247 or 1-800-987-3247 for info.

“LILLY’S PURPLE PLASTIC PURSE” will be presented through Jan. 26 by Alliance Children’s Theatre. Tickets are $12.50 for children and $15 for adults. Held at the Woodruf f Ar ts Center in Atlanta. Call (404) 733-5000 for tickets.

“A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM” through Feb. 9 at the New American Shakespeare Tavern in Atlanta. Tuesday-Saturday performances at 7:30 p.m.; Sunday per formances at 6:30 p.m. Tickets are $19.50 Thursdays and Sundays, $22.50 Fridays and $24.50 on Saturdays, with $10 Tuesday and Wednesday night per formances. Student and group discounts available. Optional British pubstyle menu served one hour and fif teen minutes prior

Coming this Spring …

Jan. 26, 2003 - 3:00pm

Tickets $12 - $40

outlets, as well as at the Civic Center Box Of fice. The 2003 Augusta Futurity Parade will be held Jan. 26. For information, contact Dennis Kelly at 828-4388.

“A VOICE OF THEIR OWN: BLACK CLASSICAL MUSIC IN GEORGIA” EXHIBIT Feb. 1-May 26 at the Georgia Music Hall of Fame in Macon, Ga. Opening reception with Mat tiwilda Dobbs Feb. 7, 7 p.m. Call 1-888-GA-ROCKS.

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M E T R O S P I R I T

PEACHCARE FOR KIDS AND RIGHT FROM THE START MEDICADE offers free or low-cost health coverage to qualifying families. Coverage includes prenatal care, hospitalization, vaccines, dental and vision care and is available to pregnant women of all ages and to children through age 19. Contact the RSM Project at 729-2086 or 721-5611 for information.

“TWENTY YEARS AGO” will be presented by NarroWay Productions Winter Dinner Theatre in Myr tle Beach, S.C., on Fridays and Saturdays in January and Feb. 14-15. Tickets are $24.95 or $23.95 for groups and senior citizens. To make reservations, call (803) 802-2300 or 1-888-437-7473.

YOGA CLASSES at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital are held on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 7-8 a.m. for $45/month or 10:30 a.m. to noon for $55/month. Call 823-6294.

“FOR THIS WORLD AND BEYOND: AFRICAN ART FROM THE FRED AND RITA RICHMAN COLLECTION” through May 25 at the High Museum of Ar t in Atlanta.

Call (404) 733-HIGH or visit www.high.org for info.

FREE HIV/AIDS TESTING every Tuesday from 4 to 7 p.m. at St. Stephen’s Ministry, 922 Greene Street. Free anonymous testing, pre- and post-test counseling and education.

J TICKETS FOR “VAREK AI,” a production by the Cirque A du Soleil, now on sale. Shows are March 6-30 at N Cumberland Galleria in Atlanta. Visit www.cirquedu2 3 2 0 0 3

HATHA YOGA CLASSES at the St. Joseph Home Health Care Center in Daniel Village Plaza. Held 10 a.m. to noon Monday, Wednesday and Friday and 6:30-8:30 p.m. Monday through Thursday. $10 per class or $60 a month for unlimited classes. Mats are provided, but bring a towel and a water bot tle.

Call Tess at 738-2782 for more information.

soleil.com for more information.

“DEFINING CR AFT I: COLLECTING FOR THE NEW MILLENNIUM” exhibit at the Columbia Museum of Ar t in Columbia, S.C., through Feb. 23. For more information, call the museum at (803) 799-2810 or visit www.columbiamuseum.org.

“PARIS IN THE AGE OF IMPRESSIONISM: MASTERWORKS FROM THE MUSEE D’ORSAY” will be at the High Museum of Ar t in Atlanta now through March 16.

This exhibition marks the first time since the Orsay opened that pieces in its collection have traveled to the U.S. For more information, visit www.ParisinAtlanta.org, www.high.org, or call (404) 733-HIGH.

Benefits “A TASTE OF SOMETHING WILD” WILD GAME TASTING AND SOIREE is sponsored by the Augusta West Rotary Club and benefits the Alzheimer’s Association. Held Feb. 1, 5-9 p.m., at the Julian Smith Barbecue Pit. Live bluegrass music.

Tickets are $30 per person and are available through any Augusta West Rotary Club member. For information, contact: Wallace Zealy, 737-0860; Toni Giusto, 737-9400; Dallas Simon, 733-5529; Bill Phillips, 796-4332.

AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY RICHMOND-COLUMBIA RELAY FOR LIFE KICK-OFF Jan. 23, 6 p.m. at The Clubhouse. For more information, call 731-9900.

AUGUSTA ICE BOWL Jan. 25 to benefit the Golden Harvest Food Bank at the Lake Olmstead Disc Golf Course. A $20 donation is required. Registration begins at 8 a.m. and the first round of play begins at 10 a.m. Call Sue Anne at 7376095 for more information.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER BLOOD DRIVES in various locations around the CSRA this month. The blood center is urging people of all blood types to donate in order to combat a blood supply shor tage. For detailed information on locations and times to donate, visit www.shepeardblood.org. You may also call Susan Edwards at (803) 6437996 for information on Aiken locations and Nancy Szocinski at 737-4551 for information on all other locations.

AMERICAN RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVES at the Aiken Red Cross Blood Center on Millbrook Drive and the Augusta Red Cross Blood Center on Pleasant Home Road. The bloodmobile will also stop at various area locations this week. For a complete list, call the Aiken Blood Center at (803) 642-5180 or the Augusta Blood Center at 868-8800.

Learning BUSINESS PLANNING WORKSHOP Feb. 6, 8:30 a.m.-1 p.m. in Room 140 of the Business and Education Building, USC-

A FREE WOMEN’S HEALTH CLINIC is held from 6-8 p.m. on Tuesdays at the Salvation Army and Welfare Center, 1383 Greene St. Services include Pap smear, breast exam and the diagnosis and treatment of sexually transmit ted diseases.

For more info or an appointment, call the St. Vincent dePaul Health Center at 828-3444.

“Thirty Years of Rock and Roll: Photography by Larry Hulst” opens Jan. 25 at the Augusta Museum of History.

Aiken. Registration is required; call (803) 641-3646 or email SBDC@usca.edu.

Computer Courses, Financial Strategies, Yoga and more. Call the Office of Continuing Education at (803) 641-3288.

AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY CONTINUING EDUCATION CLASS features “An Introduction to Georgia History” Feb. 4 and 11, 5-7 p.m. Call 722-8454 for details.

AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONTINUING EDUCATION is now offering the following classes: Spanish Language and Culture for Health Professionals, Neck and Shoulder Massage, Beginning Photography, SAT Review Courses, a Foreign Language series and more. Also, ASU offers online courses. For more information, call 737-1636 or visit www.ced.aug.edu.

SILK RIBBON EMBROIDERY CLASS teaches the basics of silk ribbon embroidery and par ticipants will make a project to take home. Open to adults 18 and older. Cost is $30 per person. Held at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken Feb. 4, 14:30 p.m. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

LANGUAGE SAMPLER: Learn basic phrases of conversational French, German, Spanish or Greek in three-week sessions at the Gibbs Library, star ting Jan. 28. Space is limited, so call the library at 863-1946 to register.

ASU LITERACY CENTER TEACHER WORKSHOP Jan. 25, 8 a.m.-2 p.m. at Washington Hall Towers on the Augusta State University campus. Workshop is open to teachers of infants, toddlers, preschool and elementary-aged children. Workshop is $24 per person and at tendees will receive 6 DHRapproved hours. Call 733-7043 to confirm your place.

REGISTRATION FOR WINTER 2003 CONTINUING EDUCATION COURSES AT AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY is now underway. For course information or to request a catalog, call 737-1636 or log on to www.ced.aug.edu.

SMALL BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT COURSES to be offered in January by the University of Georgia Business Outreach Services Small Business Development Center Network: Small Business Bookkeeping, Jan. 28. Cost is $35, and class is held 6:30-8:30 p.m. in the Business Outreach Services Augusta office. Call 737-1790 for information and registration.

BRIDGE CLASSES at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken.

Intermediate class is held March 25-May 20. Cost is $20 per person, plus a $14 materials fee that must be paid at the first class. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

USC-AIKEN CONTINUING EDUCATION offers the following courses: Sign Language, Italian, Paralegal Cer tification,

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AIKEN TECH CONTINUING EDUCATION will offer the following courses in January: Intro to Computers, Windows 2000 Basic Concepts, Health Care courses, Rape Aggression Defense, Beginning Cake Decorating, Professional Cooking, Real Estate courses and more. Aiken Tech also offers Education to Go classes online. For more information or to register, call (803) 593-9231, ex t. 1230.

Health PROJECT LINK COMMUNITY LECTURE SERIES is held the first Tuesday of every month and is sponsored by the MCG Children’s Medical Center. Project Link provides educational resources and guidance for families who have children with developmental delays, disabilities and other specialized health concerns. Free and open to the public; takes place from 6:30-8 p.m. in the main conference room at the Children’s Medical Center. Feb. 4 lecture is “Transitioning From School to Work.” Call 721-6838 for information.

UNIVERSITY HEALTH CARE SYSTEM COMMUNITY EDUCATION holds workshops, seminars and classes on a variety of topics: weight and nutrition, women’s health, cancer, diabetes, seniors’ health and more. Suppor t groups and health screenings are also offered. Call 736-0847 for details.

“BACK TO BACKS” BACK PAIN/INJURY HEALTH EDUCATION CLASS at the Life Learning Center’s Uptown Division, Room 3C-104. Free workshop begins at 2:30 p.m. Jan. 23.

Call 733-0188, ex t. 7989 to enroll.

W.G. WATSON, M.D., WOMEN’S CENTER CONDUCTS EDUCATION CLASSES at University Hospital. Course topics include Lamaze, breast feeding, parenting and grandparenting. Par tners will learn positive suppor t techniques. There are also programs designed to help older siblings adjust to new family members. Some classes are free, while others require a fee. Registration is required by calling 774-2825.

Kids GIRLS’ FAST-PITCH SOFTBALL REGISTR ATION Feb. 3-10 at Citizens Park II in Aiken. Open to girls ages 7 and older by Jan. 1, 2003; first-time players must bring a bir th cer tificate to registration. League play begins in April. For information, call (803) 642-7761.

DIXIE YOUTH BASEBALL REGISTR ATION at Citizens Park II in Aiken Feb. 3-10. Open to children ages 5 and older by Aug. 1, 2003; first-time players must bring a bir th cer tificate to registration. League play begins in April. Call (803) 642-7761.

VALENTINE CR AFTS WITH SANDY GREEN for children ages 6-12 Jan. 25, 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. at the Ma xwell Branch Library. Call 793-2020 for information.

AFTER-SCHOOL PROGR AM at the Smith-Hazel Recreation Center in Aiken January through May, 2-6 p.m. Open to kids ages 5-13. Call (803) 642-7635.

CHILDREN’S LEARNING CENTER at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History open Monday-Friday, 4:30-6:30 p.m., through June. For information, call 724-3576.

ACADEMIC HELP AND TUTORING available Saturdays, 2:30-4:30 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 722-6275 to make arrangements.

GIRLS INCORPOR ATED AFTER-SCHOOL PROGR AM runs through the end of the 2002-2003 school year. A variety of programs will be of fered. Services include van pick-up at select schools, evening drop-of f, homework room and hot evening meal. Open to girls in kindergar ten through high school. Af ter-school program of fered 2:30-6 p.m. Mon.-Fri. For more information, call 733-2512.

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YOUTH LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT SKILLS PROGRAM for teens ages 12-19 held the third Saturday of the month at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History. Call 724-3576.

WEEKLY STORY SESSIONS at all branch libraries. Visit www.ecgrl.public.lib.ga.us for more information.

FIRST SATURDAY STORYTELLING at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum. In addition, there is a tour of the museum. Held 10 a.m. to noon the first Saturday of the month. Call 724-3576.

Seniors THE ACADEMY FOR LIFELONG LEARNING offers lectures, courses, field trips, discussion groups and community information seminars on a variety of topics to mature adults. For more information, contact the USC-Aiken Office of Continuing Education at (803) 641-3288.

PEOPLE WITH ARTHRITIS CAN EXERCISE (PACE) meets at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital Tuesdays and Thursdays from 1-2 p.m. Call 823-5294.

THE SENIOR CITIZENS COUNCIL OF GREATER AUGUSTA AND THE CSRA offers a variety of classes, including aerobics, quilting, tai chi, Spanish, painting, line dancing, bowling, bridge, computers, yoga and pinochle. For dates and times, phone 826-4480.

ARTHRITIS AQUATICS offered Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital. Classes meet 99:45 a.m., 10-10:45 a.m. or 12:15-1 p.m. $37.50/month. To register, call 733-5959.

SENIORNET provides adults age 50 and over education for and access to computer technology. Many different courses are offered. Contact the USC-Aiken Continuing Education Office at (803) 641-3563.

Sports THE AUGUSTA RUGBY CLUB is always looking for new members. Teams available for women and men; no experience necessary. Practice is Tuesday and Thursday nights, 79 p.m. at Richmond Academy. For more information, call Don Zuehlke, 495-2043, or e-mail augustar fc@yahoo.com.

You may also visit www.augustarugby.org.

CO-ED VOLLEYBALL LEAGUE begins at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken in the spring. Organizational meeting held at Citizens Park Feb. 4. Fees and rosters due Feb. 18, with play beginning March 17. Open to adults 18 and older. Call (803) 643-4663 for more information.

THE AUGUSTA ROWING CLUB is sponsoring an open house at the Boathouse Jan. 25, 10 a.m. The public is invited to at tend and gather information about rowing and oppor tunities at the Augusta Rowing Club. For information, visit www.augustarows.com or contact Brenda Cole, 855-9710.

TEN STAR ALL-STAR BASKETBALL CAMP is accepting applications for its summer programs through April. Boys and girls ages 10-19 are eligible. Call (704) 373-0873 for info.

UPCOMING AUGUSTA LYNX HOME GAMES: Feb. 7-8, 12, 14-15, 20, 22-23 and 28 and March 1, 14-15, 19, 21-22, 25, 28 and 30. For tickets, call the Lynx ticket office at 724-4423.

TICKETS NOW ON SALE for the Augusta GreenJackets 2003 season. Home games at Lake Olmstead Stadium. Tickets available at www.tixonline.com or by phone at (803) 2784TIX. There is also a TIX outlet inside Harmon Optical in Southgate Plaza.

YOUTH MONTHLY SPARRING the last Thursday of the month, 5:30 p.m., at the Augusta Boxing Club. Call 733-7533.

Volunteer AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY DOCENT TR AINING Feb. 3, 10, 17 and 24, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Call 722-8454 for details.

GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART DOCENT TR AINING PROGR AM: Volunteers will guide “If Walls Could Talk” tour, featuring the history and architecture of Ware’s Folly. Contact the Education Director at 7225495 for more information.

THE EARNED INCOME TAX CREDIT COALITION CAMPAIGN seeks volunteers to prepare basic ta x returns for low/limited income individuals, those with disabilities, non-English speakers and the elderly. Volunteers receive free training and instruction materials from the IRS. Call the Mayor’s Of fice for Work force

Development at 821-1834.

31

GOLDEN HARVEST FOOD BANK needs volunteers during the day, Monday-Friday, to help sor t donated products and assist in their agency shopping area. Help is needed year-round. If you are able to lif t 25 pounds and would like to help fight hunger in the Augusta area, contact Laurie Roper at 736-1199, ex t. 208.

M E T R O

THOROUGHBRED R ACING HALL OF FAME DOCENTS NEEDED: Duties include opening and closing the Hall of Fame, greeting visitors and providing information about museum exhibits. Call Lisa Hall, (803) 6427650 for information.

OLDER AMERICANS ACT SENIOR NUTRITION PROGRAM is looking for volunteers to serve meals to needy older residents. To volunteer, contact the Senior Citizens Council at 826-4480. For those in need of home-delivered meals, call 210-2018 or toll free at 1-888-922-4464.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL: New volunteer orientation is scheduled the first Saturday of each month at 1 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Schedule subject to change; call 790-6836 to verify dates and times.

THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY is looking for animal lovers willing to donate a lit tle of their time. Volunteers are needed every Saturday at the Pet Center located behind GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Road. Call 261-PETS for more info.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER is seeking donors to prevent a blood supply shor tage. To donate call 737-4551, 854-1880 or (803) 643-7996.

Meetings AUGUSTA AREA SURVIVORS OF SUICIDE meets Jan. 26, 3 p.m., at Advent Lutheran Church, 3232 Washington Rd. Call 863-6785 for more information.

AUGUSTA METRO CHAMBER OF COMMERCE ANNUAL MEETING Jan. 23, 11:30 a.m. at the Radisson River front Hotel. Commissioner Michael L. Thurmond from the Georgia Depar tment of Labor is the speaker. Cost is $25 per person or $250 for a corporate table. Call 821-1300 for information.

DIABETES STUDY WE ARE CONDUCTING A STUDY FOR DIABETES WITH INADEQUATELY CONTROLLED BLOOD SUGARS YOU MAY QUALIFY IF YOU ARE • diabetic, taking oral medication • otherwise in good health • willing to perform blood sugar monitoring • willing to give yourself medicine by injection All study related care, including; study medications, glucometer and test strips, visits and procedures are provided at no charge.

Travel compensation provided.

Call: CSRA PARTNERS IN HEALTH Diane K. Smith, MD 1220 Augusta West Parkway Augusta, GA 30909 706-860-3001

Weekly FREE ‘N’ ONE SUPPORT GROUP for those bat tling addiction to drugs and alcohol. Approach is a spiritual one. Held every Thursday night. For information, contact Sarah Barnes, 772-7325.

TOUGH LOVE SUPPORT GROUP Monday nights, 6:30-7:30 p.m. at the South Augusta Resource Center. Learn how to understand addiction and how to exercise tough love with those you care about. Call Sarah Barnes, 772-7325, for info.

THE FIRST STEP DIVORCE RECOVERY WORKSHOP Sundays through Feb. 9, 4-6 p.m. in Room 201 of the Walton Building at First Baptist Church of Augusta. Meetings are free to the public and no pre-registration is required; however, you must call to reserve childcare for children age 5 and under. 731-5355.

WALT DISNEY PIN TRADING GROUP is forming for all those interested in collecting and trading pins from Walt Disney World, Disneyland and other Disney resor ts. For more information, contact Tim Conway, 729-9900.

GEORGIA-CAROLINA TOASTMASTERS meets Wednesdays at noon at the Clubhouse, 2567 Washington Rd. $8 for lunch; visitors welcome. 860-9854.

SEXAHOLICS ANONYMOUS, a 12-step program of recovery from addiction to obsessive/compulsive sexual thoughts and behaviors, meets Wednesdays at 8 p.m. and Saturdays at 7 p.m. at Augusta Counselling Services. Call 339-1204 and leave first name and phone number; a confidential reply is assured.

AUGUSTA TOASTMASTERS CLUB #326 meets Thursdays at 7:30 p.m. at Advent Lutheran Church. Call 868-8431.

BUSINESS NETWORK INTERNATIONAL Augusta Chapter meets every Thursday morning from 7 to 8:30 a.m. at the Cour tyards by Mariot t. The group is a business networking group designed to give and receive referrals. All professionals welcome. For more information or to join, call Barbara Crenshaw, 868-3772.

Kent & Candy Christmas Sunday, January 26 8:30 am 11:00 am 6:30 pm Kent is an anointed preacher who ministers the Word with a prophetic anointing. Candy is known for her days of singing with her family, The Hemphills, as well as her own solo career.

She can be seen on the Gaither Homecoming Videos.

RIVERWALK TOASTMASTERS meets Mondays, 7 p.m. in Classroom 3 at University Hospital. Call Gale Kan, 855-7071.

GUIDELINES: Public Service announcements are listed in this section without charge at the discretion of the editor.

Announcements must be received by Monday at noon and will be included as space permits. Send to Events, The Metropolitan Spirit, P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914 or fax (706) 733-6663. You may also e-mail listings to rhonda_jones@metspirit.com or lisa_jordan@metspirit.com.

Listings cannot be taken over the phone.

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32 M E T R O S P I R I T

Arts: Theatre

Augusta Opera Presents “Side by Side by Sondheim”

BY RHONDA JONES

J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

A

mere two days before Augusta Opera’s “Side by Side by Sondheim” production, the three performers, who had auditioned in New York, perfected their numbers.

Dancing in synch, turning, missing a beat and laughing. Making mental notes in tails and gowns against a backdrop of the New York skyline, among a piano and garden furniture.

The performers are Willy Falk, Amanda Winfield and Pilar Cragan. Willy’s the one in the tails. They will be singing selections from Stephen Sondheim’s career. The three singers will be joined by pianist Ron Land and narrator Billy Van Horn, who wandered the stage muttering about the composer, seeming to never miss a beat, in his own rehearsal space, outside of time and the realm of the singers. Untouched, even by director Michael Capasso.

Time was drawing near.

Managing Director of Augusta Opera Katherine DeLoach spoke excitedly about the show. “It’s a fully staged production,” she said. “It’s a tribute to Stephen Sondheim, to his finest works from ‘Westside Story’ all the way up to ‘Follies.’”

“Westside Story” is “Romeo and Juliet” set in the 1950s “greaser” culture. It made its debut in 1957 and gave Sondheim, partnered with Leonard Bernstein, his first taste of success. The street gangs The Jets, a white gang, and The Sharks, a Puerto Rican gang, replaced the Montagues and the Capulets, respectively. The same device is used near the end, that of convincing Tony that Maria has been killed, and causing him to go to his own death.

The musical is a lot of fun, despite the tragedy.

“Follies” is about a group of aging performers who revisit their old theatre for one last hurrah, taunted by the ghosts of their younger selves about the unrealized dreams of youth. Perhaps tying up some loose ends of passion. Perhaps changing their lives by revisiting the past, or perhaps saying a final goodbye to old dreams and the hopes of youth.

But “Side by Side” promises to be an upper, a celebration of the artist’s work.

“Willy Falk is a Tony Award winner,” DeLoach said. “He was nominated for his performance of Christ in the original ‘Saigon.’”

A few of his other performances have been in “Evita,” “Chess” and “A Little Night Music.”

“This season he sang Sam in ‘Susannah.’

He’s singing in the ‘Elixir of Love’ for Di Capo Opera in New York. He does a lot of voice-over too.”

He’s a busy bee.

“We hired these singers individually.

They’re all New York artists.”

In fact, she said, they started rehearsals last week in New York, because the Opera didn’t have access to the Imperial Theatre

Left to Right: Amanda Winfield, Willy Falk & Pilar Cragan

“IT’S A TRIBUTE TO STEPHEN SONDHEIM, TO HIS FINEST WORKS FROM ‘WESTSIDE STORY’ ALL THE WAY UP TO ‘FOLLIES.’” - Katherine DeLoach, managing director of Augusta Opera at the time. They rehearsed at Di Capo Opera, where Capasso is director.

See how it all comes together?

They even had the gowns designed specifically for the show. Those are the work of one Alicia Mugetti, whom I really, really wanted to interview because of her work history. Alas, there’s a language barrier, and such an attempt on my part would probably cause an international incident.

But check this out: She has her name on a salon on Madison Avenue in New York City, and her designs strut on more than just the Imperial Theatre stage. And now for a little name-dropping: She has worked for Barbara Streisand, Emma Thompson, Carly Simon, Claire Bloom, Eugenia Zuckerman, Princess Nakamura of Japan, Ellen Bursten and Amanda Plummer.

“Among others,” her press sheet casually states.

This isn’t the first time she’s worked with Capasso. Together they have brought to life “Yolanta,” “The Magic Flute,” “Die Fledermaus,” “Norma” and “The Tales of Hoffman.”

Why “Side by Side by Sondheim”?

“We were just looking for a piece to fit into our season that we thought people would enjoy and would have great appeal,” DeLoach said. “We knew we would have limited time for staging and rehearsal, and this would fit into that category.”

We asked what exactly the audience would experience that night. A musical collage is the impression I came away with. “The whole thing is woven into a musical evening,” DeLoach said. “It is staged as if it has a storyline. They’ve just taken all the musical pieces from these different shows and combined them into a musical evening.”

She said, also, that it was going to be a very glamorous show, so put on your very best and paint the town red on performance night.

Stephen Sondheim himself has been composing songs for decades. A New York City boy, he was born in 1930 and, after graduating from college, began winning prizes for music composition. In 1983, he was elected to the American Academy of Arts and Letters. He was profoundly influenced

by Oscar Hammerstein II during the period

that Hammerstein was working on “Oklahoma!” and fell in love with the musical form. In addition to “West Side Story,” he has helped create quite a lot of well-known musicals.

“Gypsy” is set in the 1920s, though it came to the stage in 1959. It is about family and show business. Mama Rose has high hopes for her daughters Louise and June.

After they flop in an audition for Uncle Jocko, Rose takes the girls to Los Angeles and sets them on the path toward, she hopes, fame. But her plans fall apart where June is concerned. When that daughter runs away with a man, Rose sets her sites on Louise, who succeeds, but not without some bittersweet consequences.

In 1962, “A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum” made the stage. It begins in Rome, 200 B.C. There is plenty of Shakespearean-style confusion and humor.

Other Sondheim favorites include “Anyone Can Whistle” from 1964, “Pacific Overtures” from 1976, “Company” from 1970, “A Little Night Music” from 1973, “Sweeny Todd” from 1979, “Merrily We Roll Along” from 1981, “Sunday in the Park With George” from 1984, “Into the Woods” from 1987 and “Assassins” from 1990.

“Side by Side by Sondheim” will be performed Jan. 23 at 7:30 p.m. with a matinee performance Jan. 26 at 3 p.m. at the Imperial Theatre. Tickets run from $12 to $40 with group, student and senior discounts available. For information, call the Augusta Opera at 826-4710.

Other Theatre “The Sound of Music” was the last hurrah for Richard Rodger and Oscar Hammerstein II, as it opened less than a year before the latter’s death. It is a pleasant, happy little story about the Nazi invasion of Austria. But then, that was always Rodgers and Hammerstein’s way: Touch the deep, dark troubles of mankind without depressing you in the process.

Of course, some people hate “The Sound of Music,” but plenty love it just as fiercely.

It is set in 1938, and tells the story of Maria Von Trapp and the family she “adopted,” coming first to them as a governess and falling in love with her employer along the way.

It opened Nov. 16, 1959 and was the second-longest running Broadway musical of the 1950s. Then, in 1965 the film starring Julie Andrews as Maria brought the wellloved stories into movie theatres. And of course, it shows up in our homes once a year as well.

The hills will be alive with “The Sound of Music” Jan. 24-25 and 31 and Feb. 1, 7-8 and 14-15 at the Abbeville Opera House.

Matinee performances will be held Jan. 25 and Feb. 1, 8 and 15. For information, call (864) 459-2157.

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34 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

Arts: Theatre

Fried Chicken, Moon Pies and Brand New Art

BY RHONDA JONES

“W

here did I find him?”

Morris Museum of Art Director Kevin Grogan asked this in response to the very same question. As it turned out, he’d “found” John Egerton about 23 – maybe 24 – years ago in Nashville, Tenn. The two have been friends since.

Egerton (pronounced “edge,” not “egg”) is a journalist who has edited a collection of essays on Southern cuisine called “Cornbread Nation I: The Best of Southern Food Writing.” On Jan. 30 at 7 p.m., Egerton will be here to speak about the book.

Anticipating that such a lecture may make some mouths start watering, Morris Museum officials have arranged for a reception to follow, which will include traditional Southern dishes.

“In addition to being a journalist, he is a cultural historian,” Grogan said.

Egerton is a founder of the Southern Foodways Alliance at the Center for the Study of Southern Culture at the University of Mississippi. Its stated mission is “to celebrate, preserve, promote, and nurture the traditional and developing diverse food cultures of the American South.”

When you dip into “Cornbread Nation,” you will realize that you’re not just reading about food: You’re reading about people. For instance, on page 47, you will find “From the Recipe File of Luba Cohen,” written by Marcie Cohen Ferris, about a Russian Jewish woman who moved in 1912 to New York with a head full of recipes from the homeland, and then later to Arkansas. Wherever she went, she collected vastly different recipes, so that when her recipe box was opened by the relatives who survived her, what they found there was a treasure that chronicled her life.

Egerton himself says it didn’t happen that way by accident.

“Food may be about as basic as anything that we have to identify us,” he said. “There is a class of food that is readily identifiable as Southern.”

“It gives you access to the culture in ways that maybe religion doesn’t or politics doesn’t or professional life doesn’t,” he added.

A conversation with a man who loves Southern food so much he’s dedicated volumes to it would not be complete without asking him what his own favorite delectibles are.

“Oh, you could just about guess on that,” he said. “I’m a big barbecue guy, and I’ve loved fried chicken since I was a kid.

Real fried chicken done at home.”

In fact, he said, he had a chicken for the frying pan just waiting for him and his wife to flip a coin over who got to cook it.

“Either way,” he said, “it’ll be real good.”

Edgerton will visit the Morris Museum Thursday, Jan. 30, at 7 p.m. Admission is $10 for members, $12 for nonmembers.

For information, call (706) 724-7501.

Also at the Morris Last week, on Jan. 11, the Morris Museum opened an exhibition titled “Recent Acquisitions: 2002,” which will run until Feb. 23. Ten artists, some local, will be represented by the works hanging in this exhibition. You are sure to recognize at least a name or two.

“Phil (Morsberger) of course is the local star, who’s represented in the show,” Grogan said. “A number of people represented in the show have national reputations. Joan Baeder is one of the half-dozen or so leading photo realist painters in the country.”

You may recognize Robert Bazemore, who trained at Augusta State University and exhibits at the Mary Pauline Gallery in downtown Augusta on Artists’ Row. Grogan describes Herb Jackson as a “mainstay” of the prestigious Davidson College (North Carolina) art department, an artist who is widely collected by many museums. His Morris piece is 6 feet wide and full of energy, Grogan said.

Tom Nakashima was recently appointed to the position of William S. Morris Eminent Scholar. “He’s a very interesting artist who has particular concerns with the physicality of the

Margaret Ramsey - Rev. Clarence Jackson’s Wake — A Dream landscape,” Grogan said.

Kentucky artist Eleanor Hancock Pryor represents, he said, the museum’s interest in collecting the works of Southern women. “In this case we were able to acquire a self-portrait and a still life. She’ll help us to address our interest in regionalism and early modernist concerns.”

Other artists represented in the exhibit are John Baeder, Margaret Ramsey, Lorenso Scott, Juanita Rogers and Purvis Young.

So is this an exhibition of “Southern” art?

“I think it would be tough to characterize it that way,” he said. For instance, Gilbert Gaul was born in New Jersey, he said, but was the son of a Tennessean. “He was very much taken with the landscape and the people of the South, and so in that regard, he’s a Southerner.

“In truth, we take the position here that everyone would be a Southerner if they had the choice,” Grogan said.

The exhibit will be shown through Feb. 23, 2003. After that, for the first time in Georgia, there will be an exhibition of famed 97-year-old outsider artist Bessie Nickens, titled “Walking the Log: Memories of a Southern Childhood.”

For more information call (706) 724-7501.

Playing With Artists A week before it happened, I had no way of knowing I would be spending the following Saturday morning in a downtown artist’s studio perched before an empty canvas. Anne Nielsen, you may recall, is the artist at Phoenix Gallery on Artists’ Row who paints dream-like images she calls Orbs, and she has taken on the formidable task of helping a writer create a masterpiece. Well, in the broadest possible sense of the word.

This is why.

The artists have hatched a plot: Get local celebrities to create

paintings – assisted, of course, by people who know what they’re doing – and try very hard to sell them at auction to raise money for a scholarship fund to be awarded to a CSRA graduating high school senior planning on a career in art.

Fortunately, the artists who are working with said celebs will be donating real works of art for the auction as well.

Greg Goodwin, director of the Imperial Theatre, is working with artist Jim Tar of Art on Broad. In conversation with The Spirit, he was ready to “see how it goes.”

“I’m not an artist,” he said. “I have just been an admirer of people that had that talent. My background is as a performing artist, not a visual artist. I was honored that Jim asked me to paint with him, since I have always loved his work.”

Here is a list of participants: Tom Campbell of Channel 12, Georgene Wright of Broadstrokes Gallery; former mayor Charles Devaney, Lou Ann Zimmerman of Zimmerman Gallery, formerly Gallery 1006; local poet Starkey Flythe, Tom Swift of Gensheer’s Studios and Gallery; Imperial Theatre Director Greg Goodwin, Jim Tar of Art on Broad; Julia Harding of Channel 12, Jill Stafford of Dunlap Gallery; Matt Monroe of Channel 6, Lillie Morris of Broadstrokes; Mary Morrison of Channel 6, Lucy Weigle of Dunlap Gallery; Laurie Ott of Channel 12, Juliet Dearing of Banker/Dearing Gallery; Augusta Symphony Conductor Donald Portnoy, Ann Marie Dalis of Gensheer’s Studios and Gallery; Steven Uhles of The Augusta Chronicle, Karen Banker of the Banker/Dearing Gallery; Marion White, events coordinator, Barbara Whetstone of Broadstrokes; and yours truly with Anne Nielsen of Phoenix Gallery.

The silent auction will be held during the Feb. 7 First Friday from 6-9 p.m. at participating artists’ studios in downtown Augusta.

If you have questions, call Lou Ann Zimmerman at 7741006 or Kristin Varn at 722-1028.

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Cinema

2 3

“Confessions of a Dangerous Mind”

Movie Listings

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About Schmidt (R) — Sad, very sad. Not only because Jack Nicholson is playing a sour, dumpy bore, but because the movie is a bore. As Schmidt, he's the lit tle American loser who set tled for mediocre, false comfor t through conformity, but Alexander Payne directs as if this dull fact is a fresh revelation.

The film is iner t, rarely funny, rarely dramatic, though Kathy Bates swings her jived bulk into a hot tub and briefly sparks Jack into an inkling of his stellar self; then he shrinks. Sad. 2 hrs. (Elliot t) ★ Adaptation (R) — "Adaptation" is an occasionally inspired film about a writer stymied by his screenplay.

Nicolas Cage plays both Charlie Kaufman and his brother (who isn't real), Donald, a sor t of creative antibody. Cage's Charlie is a sweat bag of fear about every idea, frantic about losing his hair and not appealing to women he can barely approach; Don is an upbeat, pushy doof prone to bad jokes and happily stupid at titude. Beyond the doubled Cage compulsion (good acting, even bet ter tech work), the film has rich filler.

Cast: Nicolas Cage, Meryl Streep, Chris Cooper, Cara Seymour, Tilda Swinton. Running time: 1 hr., 54 mins.

(Elliot t) ★★★1/2 Antwone Fisher (PG-13) — Denzel Washington directed himself, as a Navy psychiatrist in San Diego, and Derek Luke as Fisher, a sailor spikey with anger because of his tormented youth. Washington's authority is manifest and humane, the story has moments of honest searching, but the appealing Luke never quite gives us the pain of a truly agonized man. 1 hr., 53 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Barbershop (PG-13) — In this day in the wacky life of a Chicago salon, the rapper/actor Ice Cube drops his rough, gruf f image to play Calvin, the current owner of the barbershop. The shop was passed

“Darkness Falls”

down to him from his dad and has been a mainstay of the community for years. Calvin couldn't care less, because he has a pregnant wife and wants to make money fast. In a moment of stupidity, he sells the place to the neighborhood loan shark. Af ter spending a day talking with customers and fellow barbers, he realizes the impor tance of the shop. He then has to buy back the shop at double the price. Meanwhile at the barbershop itself, tensions begin to rise. Cast: Ice Cube, Anthony Anderson, Sean Patrick Thomas, Eve, Troy Garity, Michael Ealy and Cedric the Enter tainer.

Running time: 1 hr., 42 mins. (McCormick) ★★★ Brown Sugar (PG-13) — "Brown Sugar " is a romantic comedy focusing on two childhood friends who have both found success in the world of hip-hop: one is an A&R executive at a record label and the other is the editor of a glossy music mag. Even though they’re both involved with others, the two find that they may have already found love – years ago with each other. Cast: Sanaa Latham, Taye Diggs, Queen Latifah, Mos Def. Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) — From the breezy opening credits done in '60s hip style, Steven Spielberg's charmed enter tainment flies along with confidence. Leonardo DiCaprio is entirely engaging as Frank Abagnale Jr., con ar tist and ace kiter of checks, pursued with increasingly caring fixation by Tom Hanks as a square FBI man. Christopher Walker is the smooth-talking flop dad whom Frank yearns to impress. 2 hrs., 15 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Chicago (PG-13) —- It's been 23 years since Richard Gere stripped on Broadway for "Bent." Now he gets to pull of f his clothes as slick shyster Billy Flynn.

Mostly in wonder ful suits, his hair shining like creased silver, Gere is having the best time of his movie life, singing and tapdancing and lording over women with rakish snaz. He's a lioness-tamer; the main cats are Velma Kelly (Catherine Zeta-Jones), a cabaret sex bazooka and killer on Death Row and newcomer Roxie Har t (Renee Zellweger), a Bet ty Boop who killed her lover. For cash and headlines, Flynn will help guilty women beat the law. "Chicago" is zip for depth, but it has all the sexy sur face it needs to be ex travagantly alive. It tops of f at the Chicago Theater, and the old show palace looks delighted. Cast: Renee Zellweger, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Richard Gere, John C. Reilly, Queen Latifah, Christine Baranski, Taye Diggs. Running time: 1 hr., 53 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★★

Columbia Pictures

Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (R) —

This black comedy is based on the unauthorized biography of television game show producer Chuck Barris, who claimed he was a CIA hitman on the side. Barris, the man behind such successful game shows as the Dating Game, the Newlywed Game and the Gong Show, uses his role as chaperone of vacation winners as cover for his illegal actions. George Clooney makes his directorial debut, as well as spending time in front of the camera. Cast: Drew Barrymore, Julia Rober ts, Sam Rockwell, George Clooney.

Darkness Falls (PG-13) — A young man in a small town, isolated because the locals think he’s crazy, is the only one who can help a young boy, the brother of his childhood girlfriend. The boy is threatened by a centuries-old evil, a force that served as the inspiration for the tale of the tooth fairy. Cast: Chaney Kley, Emma Caulfield, Joshua Anderson, Andrew Bayly, Emily Browning.

RATINGS

★★★★ — Excellent.

Mirimax Films

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Drumline (PG-13) — A young street drummer from Harlem wins a scholarship to at tend a Southern university and decides to make the trek af ter being convinced by the university’s band director, even though he knows he’ll have a hard time fit ting in.

Gradually, his drumming skills help the other students warm up to him. Cast: Nick Cannon, Orlando Jones, Zoe Saldana, Jason Weaver.

8 Mile (R) — As Jimmy "Rabbit" Smith, Eminem flunks his first hip-hop bat tle, a cut ting contest of insult rhymes at a black club, is pegged a choker and sulks back to his grueling job at a metal-stamping mill.

The simple story is how Rabbit motorizes his mouth, confirming the "genius" proclaimed by pal and club emcee Future (Mekhi Phifer). As a buzzer, it has juice.

Thanks to Eminem and the rising rap momentum, "8 Mile" is engrossing. In this urban, if not urbane, fantasy, the hero takes a bad beating, gets up and goes to work, interrupts work to wow everyone at the hip-hop club, then returns to work af ter a verbal outlay that would have put even Winston Churchill in bed for days.

Cast: Eminem, Kim Basinger, Mekhi Phifer, Evan Jones, Brit tany Murphy, Anthony Mackie. Running time: 1 hr., 58 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Empire (R) — Victor Rosa is John Leguizamo's best movie work so far, a subtle and richly internalized per formance. Vic is a Bronx drug dealer who runs his four-man crew of buddies. Feeling successful but crowded, and now at tached to a woman (Delilah Cot to) he loves, Vic meets the smoothie Jack Wimmer (Peter Sarsgaard). This yupster grif ter has an Ivy League purr of success and suits that seem tailored down to his chromosomes; he lures Vic into an airy investment scheme that seems more legal and less lethal than Vic's drug jungle. Grateful to be adopted into a dream world he has envied, feeling this is a classy "out," Vic is being suckered. The movie is good at building momentum but less so in delivering, and the feeling for noir doom is never as credible as the sense of upward hunger. Cast: John Leguizamo, Peter Sarsgaard, Denise Richards, Vincent Laresca, Sonia Braga, Isabella Rossellini. Running time: 1 hr., 30 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Gangs of New York (R) — Mar tin Scorsese's film is not a bore and is never less than a show, but it feels like having obscure history lessons hammered into your skull. Filmed with potboiler instincts, this pungent flux of pre-glam New York centers on the rather my thic precinct of crime called the Five Points.

The plot, a slender bone in an obese production, involves the arrival of the Irish in New York City in

★★★— Worthy.

★★ — Mixed.

★ — Poor.

1846 and af ter. They face the prejudice of a nativist gang of thugs, allied with young Tammany Hall. Cast: Leonardo DiCaprio, Daniel Day-Lewis, Cameron Diaz, Jim Broadbent, Henry Thomas, Liam Neeson, Brendan Gleeson. 2 hrs., 40 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 A Guy Thing (PG-13) — Jason Lee plays good guy Paul, who just wants to keep on the straight and narrow at his own bachelor par ty. Apparently, that’s too much to ask, because the nex t morning he wakes up nex t to a beautiful girl, his head too fuzzy to remember any thing from the night before. Even worse, the girl turns out to be his fiancee’s cousin, and what star ts out as one lit tle lie snowballs into a fib of comedic propor tions. Cast: Julia Stiles, Jason Lee, Selma Blair, James Brolin, Shawn Hatosy.

Half Past Dead (PG-13) — Steven Seagal action flick about a criminal mastermind whose big plan is to infiltrate a ma ximum-security prison and obtain information on the whereabouts of $200 million wor th of gold from a death row inmate. What he doesn’t know is that planted inside the prison is an undercover federal agent (Seagal). Cast: Morris Chestnut, Steven Seagal, Mat t Bat taglia.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (PG) — Harry (Daniel Radclif fe) faces destiny with a

clear eye and spor ty will, not the least neurotic despite having been orphaned into a family of idiotic prigs who treat him abominably. He again escapes to Hogwar ts, to his pals (Ruper t Grint as wobble-faced Ron, Emma Watson as bookworm Hermione) and the snippish regard of Prof. Snape (Alan Rickman) and Prof.

McGonegall (Maggie Smith), and the wonder ful giant Hagrid (Robbie Coltrane) and Headmaster Dumbledore (Richard Harris, now dead). Jason Isaacs should be given more time as Lucius, the evil, white-maned father of snob Draco Malfoy. There is a sense of a grand machine greased, sometimes grinding. The "chamber of secrets" is less an exciting mystery at the center than a device to car t the bulky saga forward.

Cast: Daniel Radclif fe, Ruper t Grint, Emma Watson, Kenneth Branagh, Richard Harris, Alan Rickman, Maggie Smith, Robbie Coltrane. Running time: 2 hrs., 41 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ The Hours (PG-13) — The story begins with Virginia Woolf (Nicole Kidman) taking her famous last walk into a river, af ter put ting a big stone in her coat pocket. The movie keeps piling stones. Woolf's creation of "Mrs. Dalloway" and her much later final weeks with devotedly desperate husband Leonard (Stephen Dillane) are intercut with suf fering Woolfian women in two stories. The depressed housewife Laura

0— Not worthy.

(Julianne Moore), in 1950s Los Angeles, and the modern New Yorker, Clarissa (Meryl Streep), frantic about preparing a par ty for her AIDS-dying former lover, the writer Richard (Ed Harris). The stories link. The conception is all of a piece, organically imagined. It sends out tendrils of dark feeling about life and dying, ar t and love and transience. Cast: Meryl Streep, Ed Harris, Nicole Kidman, Julianne Moore, Stephen Dillane, Miranda Richardson, Jef f Daniels, Claire Danes.

Running time: 1 hr., 54 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2

How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days (PG-13) —

Mat thew McConaughey plays a ladies’ man who has trouble set tling down. He accepts a bet from two friends — to win, he just has to stay in a relationship more than 10 days. The girl he happens to pick, however, has entered into a bet with her friends: that she can lose a guy in 10 days. Cast: Kate Hudson, Mat thew McConaughey, Adam Goldberg.

Jonah: A Veggie Tales Movie (G) — The animated group of vegetables that stars in the "Veggie Tales" car toons comes to the big screen in "Jonah." A van of singing veggies breaks down in front of a strange seafood joint inhabited by a lazy bunch of pirates who proceed to spin the tale of Jonah and the whale for the impressionable young vegetables. Cast: Phil Vischer, Kristin Blegen, Mike Nawrocki, Lisa Vischer. Running time: 1 hr., 23 mins.

Just Married (PG-13) — Sarah, who comes from a well-to-do, snobbish family, falls in love with a traf fic repor ter — much to her family’s chagrin. The happy couple embarks on a honeymoon plagued by bad luck and the inter ference of Sarah’s ex-boy friend, commissioned by her family to split up the fledgling marriage. Cast: Ashton Kutcher, Brit tany Murphy, Christian Kane, David Moscow.

Kangaroo Jack (PG) — Two childhood friends, Charlie (Jerry O'Connell) and Louis (Anthony Anderson), from Brooklyn are forced to deliver a mysterious envelope to Australia af ter one of them accidentally causes the police to raid a mob warehouse.

En route to the land down under, Louis peeks in the package and discovers that it contains $50,000. Af ter the guys arrive in the Outback, they accidentally run over a kangaroo. Louis decides to take pictures of the animal and even puts shades and his lucky jacket on the 'roo, which is only stunned and hops away with the jacket containing the money. Now the guys are forced to chase the animal through the Outback, or they'll have to repay the mob with their lives. The real star of "Kangaroo Jack" is the beautiful Outback. That alone may be wor th the price of admission. Or not.

Cast: Jerry O'Connell, Anthony Anderson, Estella Warren, Christopher Walken, Dyan Cannon, Mar ton Csokas. Running time: 1 hr., 30 mins. (McCormick) ★

Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG13) — Long, violent, death-fixated, dark in tone,

heavy in heroic mood, this is a film for addicts of the series. Lit tle Frodo is marginalized as Viggo Mor tensen leads the defense of a castle from hordes of vicious scumballs, and the two grand beards (Ian McKellan, Christopher Lee) contend for Middle Ear th. There's a little schizo in a wispy loincloth, expressively per formed and voiced, but the almost Stone Age mythology rolls over us like layers of geology. 3 hrs. (Elliot t) ★★ Maid in Manhattan (PG-13) — The airy fantasy puts Jennifer Lopez into a cute maid's uniform at a swank New York hotel. She's Marisa, and when she tries on the very expensive, if rather Bel Air trophy wife out fit of a snobbish guest, this at tracts the "playboy" eye of senatorial hopeful Chris Marshall (Ralph Fiennes). Chris' manager (Stanley Tucci) is in controlfreak agony that the Republican politician might fall in love with someone not toity and rich. The film is most marked by the flagrant waste of talent. As the sitcom

?

“Narc”

yucks racked up their lit tle nif ties, perked along by music, I had a weird, tiny pinch of nostalgia for "Jackass: The Movie." Cast: Jennifer Lopez, Ralph Fiennes, Bob Hoskins, Natasha Richardson, Stanley Tucci, Tyler Garcia Posey. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliot t) ★1/2

My Big Fat Greek Wedding (PG) —

Unmarried Toula Por tokalos is a 30-year-old waitress in her parents’ Greek restaurant, Dancing Zorba’s.

Vowing to change, she gets a makeover and takes a job in her aunt’s travel agency, where, newly confident, she meets handsome Ian Miller — a high-school teacher who is definitely not Greek. The tale is familiar: strong and fiercely commit ted to their ethnic roots family but ts heads with the outsider wanting to marry into the group. But “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” of fers enough in the way of wit to stifle the sitcom feel a film like this might otherwise have. Cast: Nia Vardalos, John Corbet t, Louis Mandylor, Gia Carides, Joey Fatone. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins.

Narc (R) — opens with a breathless foot chase. One man is shot in the throat, another is shot dead, a pregnant woman is wounded. Narcotics detective Nick Tellis (Jason Patric) is mentally on the street every moment.

An ace at undercover work, but emotionally too strapped to his work, Tellis is suspended for that opening carnage. His wife wants him to quit. It isn't a pension plan that makes him want to stay on the force, it's his pride — and the glory-in-risk of a topping case, to solve the murder of another narcotics officer. But to do that he must work with the strong-arm veteran Lt. Henry Oak (Ray Liot ta), who is stoking a hot fuse about his young, dead par tner and the worm farm that is depar tment politics. The case drags them into a sor t of moral mudslide. "Narc" suggests that the mean streets are meaner than you want to know — but might wish to see filmed and acted this effectively. Cast: Ray Liot ta, Jason Patric, Anne Openshaw, Busta Rhymes. Running time: 1 hr., 45 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★1/2 National Security (PG-13) — Mar tin Lawrence and Steve Zahn play L.A.P.D. rejects on both ends of the spectrum who get paired up as security guards.

While on par tol, they uncover a smuggling operation, in between bits of slapstick that are obligatory for films of this genre.

The Ring (PG-13) — begins with the telling of an urban-legend-like tale that, for a while, seems likely to consign this movie to the slasher/horror bin: A weird videotape is circulating. As soon as you're through watching it, the telephone rings. A voice on the phone informs you that you have seven days to live. Seven days later, you die. The film boasts first-rate per formances, a gorgeous look, an engaging plot and a jangly, thrumming sense of dread. The ef fectiveness of such a movie depends entirely on the beholder. Save for a long, uneasy feeling of foreboding and one solid jolt, I didn't find it all that scary. Two young women exiting the theater in front of me, however, declared that the thing had terrified them, and I'm willing to take their word for it. Cast: Naomi Wat ts, Mar tin Henderson, David Dor fman, Brian Cox. Running time: 1 hr., 55 mins. (Salm) ★★1/2 The Santa Clause 2 (G) — Tim Allen discovers af ter eight years of being Santa that there's another small detail in his contract: In order for him to continue being the Jolly Old Elf, he's got to take a wife. But first he has to deal with his son, Charlie (Eric Lloyd), who's landed himself on the naughty list. Charlie's principal (Elizabeth Mitchell) wants him gone pronto and is a bit blue because the holidays don't mean as much to her as they once did. With 28 days to go before the contract expires, Santa's got a lot of work to do. One of his trusty elves comes up with a machine that can duplicate Santa while he's out in the real world hunting

for a wife. Allen is remarkable playing Santa as funny, wise and sympathetic, all at the same time. 1 hr., 42 mins. (McCormick) ★★★ Shanghai Knights (PG-13) — Jackie Chan and Owen Wilson return as Chon Wang and Roy O’Bannon in this sequel to “Shanghai Noon.” When Wang’s father is murdered by a Chinese rebel, who flees to England, the pair travel to London to get revenge. They meet up with Wang’s sister Liu, who has discovered a conspiracy to murder the royal family. Cast: Jackie Chan, Owen Wilson, Donnie Yen. Signs (PG-13) — Mel Gibson plays Father Graham Hess, an Episcopal priest who lost his faith and retired his collar af ter his wife was killed in an auto accident.

He lives in an old farmhouse with two adorable kids, plus a younger brother (Joaquin Phoenix). Big, elegantly precise "crop signs" turn up in their cornfield.

It's space aliens, and the movie teases us as the signs pile up. The aliens show up, shoving clawed hands under doors but scared by steak knives, full of evil strength, yet not able to knock down the pathetic blockade of a fruit cellar. "Signs," though handsomely shot, seems meant for viewers who need to believe in tabloid aliens, and that we can beat them with plainspun, homeland vir tues. It should be called "Sins" for compounding the sins of bad filming. Cast: Mel Gibson, Joaquin Phoenix, Rory Culkin, M. Night Shyamalan, Cherry Jones. Running time: 1 hr., 46 mins. (Elliot t) ★

Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams (PG) — A cheer ful theme park of a comedy about

junior spies, with a bigger budget and more inventive fun than the 2001 original (the plot is no advance).

Rober t Rodriguez directed, wrote, helped with the digital ef fects and gizmo touches, including excellent creatures. The many Hispanic rif fs do not land with PC heaviness, and the lively cast includes Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara as the main kids, plus Antonio Banderas, Steve Buscemi, Carla Gugino, Alan Cumming, Bill Pa x ton, Tony Shalhoub, Danny Trejo, Cheech Marin and (still macho at 81) Ricardo Montalban. Running time: 1 hr., 27 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Sweet Home Alabama (PG-13) — Only a year and two weeks af ter New York became our most tormented but inspiring city, it is upstaged by a happy hicksville called Pigeon Creek. Why? Because cute "Mel" (Reese Witherspoon) fled poor-folks marriage to Pigeon Creek sweethear t Jake (Josh Lucas). She is now a light of Manhat tan as fashion designer Melanie Carmichael. And she has the love of politically upward dreamboat Andrew (Patrick Dempsey, son of The Apple's tough but dishy mayor, Candice Bergen). Andy doesn't know that his betrothed is still married to 'Bama boy Jake, who is hur t, haunted and planning his own rise from mediocrity. Mel returns home for a divorce, puts on her corn-pone accent instantly, and rediscovers the joys of Pigeon Creek. Director Andy Tennant serves this corny material with the skill of a machine punching out Alabama license plates. Cast: Reese Witherspoon, Josh Lucas, Patrick Dempsey, Fred Ward, Mary Kay Place, Candice Bergen. Running time: 1 hr., 40 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ They (PG-13) — A grad student witnesses a horrifying incident, which rekindles her childhood fears of the dark and night terrors. Soon, she finds herself wondering if the images that plagued her as a child were real. Cast: Larua Regan, Marc Blucas, Dagmara Dominczyk, Ethan Embry, John Abrahams.

Treasure Planet (PG) — The movie transmutes Rober t Louis Stevenson's "Treasure Island" into the heavily digitalized animation of a "Star Wars" of fshoot.

Now Jim is a very American and stalwar t 'toon-teen voiced by Joseph Gordon-Levit t, and Silver (Brian Murray) is a huge cyborg with an old-salt pirate face and tech arms wor thy of the Terminator on a hardware rampage. A space movie that has interstellar craf t with lof ty, luminous sails and crusty barnacles on hulls is so absurd that it's charming. In visual fer tility, "Treasure Planet" rivals the top Japanese animations of recent vintage. For the sub-13 crowd (and many beyond it), this is satisfying holiday enter tainment.

Voices: Joseph Gordon-Levit t, Emma Thompson, Michael Wincot t, Brian Murray, Mar tin Shor t, Laurie Metcalf, Roscoe Lee Browne, Patrick McGoohan.

Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) — Lucy Kelson (Sandra Bullock) is a smar t but stressed at torney whose client, millionaire George Wade (Hugh Grant), is deeply dependent on her. George won’t let her quit until she finds her own replacement – a young lawyer who has her eye on George. George, however, is looking elsewhere: at what just lef t. Cast: Sandra Bullock, Hugh Grant, Alicia Wit t.

The Wild Thornberrys (PG) — Big-screen version of the animated Nickeloden series about a family who travels around the world to make nature documentaries. While in Africa, 12-year-old Eliza learns that she can speak with animals and, with their help, aims to stop a group of poachers. Cast: Lacey Chaber t, Tim Curry, Ruper t Everet t, Flea, Lynn Redgrave, Marisa Tomei.

—Capsules compiled from movie reviews written by David Elliott, film critic for The San Diego Union-Tribune and other staff writers.

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“The Hours” Is Confident in ItsBy DavidCraft Elliott

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f “The Hours” were any closer to being what it seems to want to be, it would be dead. Even the most affirming moments of the film seem overcast by doom.

As film art, this is truly confident morbidity, not a burial mound like Woody Allen’s “Interiors.” Michael Cunningham’s novel – a devout fan of it told me that David Hare’s translation to film is highly faithful – is complex literary chamber music about Virginia Woolf and her novel, “Mrs. Dalloway.”

The story begins with Woolf (Nicole Kidman) taking her famous last walk into a river, after putting a big stone in her coat pocket. The movie keeps piling stones.

The filmed suicide, a rebuke not of life but of the madness that had been consuming Woolf’s very fine (maybe too fine) mind, makes you think of a methodical schoolmarm imitating Ophelia. Kidman has a taut, spooky intensity and crisp accent. She put on a new nose and dived into Woolf like that river, though she never looks much like the long-faced lady enshrined in Giselle Freund’s photos.

Woolf’s creation of “Mrs. Dalloway” and her much later final weeks with devotedly desperate husband Leonard (Stephen Dillane) are intercut with suffering Woolfian women in two stories.

The depressed housewife Laura (Julianne Moore), in 1950s Los Angeles, is not comforted by her worried little son and oblivious husband (played like smiling oatmeal by John C. Reilly) or by reading “Mrs. Dalloway.”

In the most vital segments, the modern New Yorker, Clarissa (Meryl Streep), is frantic about preparing a party for her AIDS-dying former lover, the writer Richard (Ed Harris). The stories link, partly through characters, more through visual overlaps that gain added rhythm from Philip Glass’ score.

The conception is all of a piece, organically imagined. It sends out tendrils of dark feeling about life and dying, art and love and transience.

It’s also unbalanced. The Woolf scenes are just nervy warm-ups to when Virginia and Leonard have a fierce exchange at a train stop, their verbal fluency like lace upon black despair. With Moore playing the trapped but inarticulate Laura, the ‘50s segment is generic, like a glossy footnote to her housewife misery in “Far From Heaven,” though it has a great thing: Toni Collette as a big, peachy friend who will never read Woolf but whose heart opens with an honest agony that makes Laura’s seem abstract.

Streep, now a masterwork of maturity, has never been much better than as the

lovably, doggedly loyal Clarissa, who turned to a woman as life companion after her great love Richard ran off with a man (Allison Janney and Jeff Daniels nick in those small parts expertly, and Claire Danes is Clarissa’s daughter).

Streep is so full of charm and decent, human confusion that when her nerves fry, it has a shock force.

Harris virtually conquers his segment and the movie as Richard. All the buzz talk about Kidman’s fake nose (Welles, Guinness and Olivier were criticized for them!) is trivial next to his stunning depiction of a man who will burn out his candle like a ravaged sun. Nothing hammy or merely made-up about it; will the Oscars notice?

Still, our awareness of the gobs of talent on screen shows that the drama is being staged, truly acted-out. The themes are so carefully elaborated they seem rather academic, which tends to tidy up all the dying, madness, illness and angst.

Repeated shots of women hugging and kissing, if not really “gay,” certainly show a distrust of male comfort (and most of the men are gay).

“The Hours” (Woolf’s original title for “Mrs. Dalloway”) screams craft and prestige, and never goes squish like parts of “American Beauty.” It’s adult and genuine, even if director Stephen Daldry seemed more truly at home with his ace British cast in “Billy Elliot.”

Billy, after all, only wanted to dance, not to die.

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MOVIE CLOCK REGAL AUGUSTA EXCHANGE 20 Movies Good 1/24 - 1/30 How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days (PG-13) Sat: 7:45 Shanghai Knights (PG-13)/Two Weeks Notice (PG13) Sat: 7:30 The Hours (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:05, 3:55, 6:55, 9:25, 12:15; Sun-Thur: 1:05, 3:55, 6:55, 9:25 Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (R) 12:10, 3:00, 5:35, 8:10, 10:45 Darkness Falls (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:15, 2:15, 3:35, 4:45, 5:45, 7:00, 8:00, 10:25, 12:40; Sun-Thur: 1:15, 2:15, 3:35, 4:45, 5:45, 7:00, 8:00, 10:25 A Guy Thing (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 11:50, 2:20, 4:40, 7:15, 9:40, 12:05; Sun-Thur: 11:50, 2:20, 4:40, 7:15, 9:40 National Security (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:35, 2:45, 5:05, 7:20, 9:05, 9:30, 11:20, 11:45; Sun-Thur: 12:35, 2:45, 5:05, 7:20, 9:05, 9:30 Chicago (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:00, 2:00, 2:30, 4:30, 5:10, 7:00, 7:40, 9:35, 10:10, 12:00; Sun-Thur: 12:00, 2:00, 2:30, 4:30, 5:10, 7:00, 7:40, 9:35, 10:10 Adaptation (R) 7:30, 10:30 Antwone Fisher (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:20, 4:15, 7:05, 10:00, 12:35; Sun-Thur: 1:20, 4:15, 7:05, 10:00 Just Married (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:20, 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:55, 12:15; Sun-Thur: 12:20, 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:55 NARC (R) Fri: 11:55, 2:50, 5:20, 7:50, 10:20; Sat: 11:55, 2:50, 5:20, 10:20; Sun-Thur: 11:55, 2:50, 5:20, 7:50, 10:20 Kangaroo Jack (PG) Fri-Sat: 12:25, 2:25, 4:35, 6:45, 9:00, 11:10; Sun-Thur: 12:25, 2:25, 4:35, 6:45, 9:00 Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10 About Schmidt (R) Fri-Sat: 1:00, 4:00, 6:50, 9:45, 12:25; Sun-Thur: 1:00, 4:00, 6:50, 9:45 Gangs of New York (R) Fri-Sat: 12:15, 3:45, 7:55, 11:15; Sun-Thur: 12:15, 3:45, 7:55 Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) Fri: 1:50, 4:20, 7:20, 9:50, 12:20; Sat: 1:50, 4:20, 12:20; Sun-Thur: 1:50, 4:20, 7:20, 9:50 Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG-13) 12:10, 4:00, 8:05 Maid in Manhattan (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:05, 2:35, 5:15, 7:45, 10:05, 12:30; Sun: 12:05, 2:35, 5:15, 7:45, 10:05 Drumline (PG-13) 1:35, 4:25, 7:35,10:15 Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (PG) 12:30, 4:05 EVANS 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 1/24 - 1/30 Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (R) Fri: 4:00, 7:00, 9:30; Sat: 1:00, 7:10, 9:30; Sun: 1:00, 4:00, 9:30; Mon-Thur: 4:00, 7:00, 9:30 Darkness Falls (PG-13) Fri: 3:35, 5:35, 7:35, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:35, 3:35, 5:35, 7:35, 9:35; Mon-Thur: 5:35, 7:35, 9:35 About Schmidt (R) Fri: 4:10, 7:10, 9:40; Sat-Sun: 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 4:10, 7:10, 9:40 Chicago (PG-13) Sat: 5:00; Sun: 7:00 National Security (PG-13) Fri: 3:55, 5:55, 7:55, 9:55; Sat-Sun: 1:55, 3:55, 5:55, 7:55, 9:55; Mon-Thur: 5:55, 7:55, 9:55 A Guy Thing (PG-13) Fri: 3:00, 5:20, 7:40, 9:50; Sat-

Sun: 12:55, 3:00, 5:20, 7:40, 9:50; Mon-Thur: 5:20, 7:40, 9:50 My Big Fat Greek Wedding (PG) Fri: 3:25, 5:25, 7:25, 9:25; Sat-Sun: 1:25, 3:25, 5:25, 7:25, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 5:25, 7:25, 9:25 Just Married (PG-13) Fri: 3:45, 5:45, 7:45, 9:45; SatSun: 1:45, 3:45, 5:45, 7:45, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 5:45, 7:45, 9:45 Kangaroo Jack (PG) Fri: 3:15, 5:15, 7:15, 9:15; SatSun: 1:15, 3:15, 5:15, 7:15, 9:15; Mon-Thur: 5:15, 7:15, 9:15 Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) Fri: 4:05, 7:05, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 1:05, 4:05, 7:05, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 4:05, 7:05, 9:45 The Wild Thornberrys (PG) Fri: 3:30, 5:30; Sat-Sun: 1:30, 3:30, 5:30; Mon-Thur: 5:30 Drumline (PG-13) 7:30, 9:55 Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG-13) Fri: 4:40, 8:20; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 4:40, 8:20; Mon-Thur: 4:40, 8:20 Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) Fri-Sun: 2:20, 7:20; MonThur: 7:20 Maid in Manhattan (PG-13) 4:30, 9:30 MASTERS 7 CINEMAS Movies Good 1/24 - 1/30 Darkness Falls (PG-13) Fri: 5:20, 7:20, 9:45; SatSun: 1:20, 3:20, 5:20, 7:20, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 5:20, 7:20, 9:45 Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (R) Fri: 4:00, 7:00, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 4:00, 7:00, 9:35; MonThur: 4:00, 7:00, 9:35 A Guy Thing (PG-13) Fri: 7:30; Sat-Sun: 1:30, 7:30; Mon-Thur: 7:30 Kangaroo Jack (PG) Fri: 5:10, 7:10, 9:10; Sat-Sun: 1:10, 3:10, 5:10, 7:10, 9:10; Mon-Thur: 5:10, 7:10, 9:10 National Security (PG-13) Fri: 5:15, 7:15, 9:15; SatSun: 1:15, 3:15, 5:15, 7:15, 9:15; Mon-Thur: 5:15, 7:15, 9:15 Just Married (PG-13) Fri: 5:25, 7:25, 9:25; Sat-Sun: 1:25, 3:25, 5:25, 7:25, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 5:25, 7:25, 9:25 Antwone Fisher (PG-13) Fri: 4:05, 7:05, 9:40; SatSun: 1:05, 4:05, 7:05, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 4:05, 7:05, 9:40 Drumline (PG-13) 4:30, 9:30 REGAL 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 1/24 - 1/30 They (PG-13) 2:45, 5:10, 7:40, 9:30 Half Past Dead (PG-13) 2:35, 4:50, 7:30, 10:05 Empire (R) 2:05, 4:30, 7:10, 9:35 8 Mile (R) 2:25, 4:55, 7:20, 9:50 The Ring (PG-13) 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:40 Treasure Planet (PG) 2:30, 5:15, 7:45, 9:40 Santa Clause 2 (G) 2:15, 4:35, 7:00, 9:30 Sweet Home Alabama (PG-13) 2:10, 4:40, 7:15, 9:50 Brown Sugar (PG-13) 1:55, 4:25, 7:05, 9:45 Barbershop (PG-13) 2:20, 5:05, 7:50, 10:00 Spy Kids 2 (PG) 2:00, 4:25, 7:35, 9:55 Signs (PG-13) 2:00, 4:45, 7:00, 9:25

Movie listings are subject to change without notice.

Cinema: Review

“Chicago” a Traditional Adaptation of the Stage Production By Rachel Deahl

H

ollywood seems to be abuzz with the notion that the musical is finally back. An all but dead genre on the big screen, Baz Luhrmann seemingly did the impossible when he unveiled “Moulin Rouge!” to critical acclaim and successful box office returns two years ago. Now director Frank Marshall is attempting to show the staying power of movie musicals with his adaptation of the Broadway hit “Chicago.” And, like Luhrmann’s glitzy star vehicle that boasted a memorable and impressive turn from Nicole Kidman, “Chicago” is quickly proving that the real appeal of today’s song and dance flick is the chance to see an A-list actor who can actually belt out a tune.

Of course, for those who won’t be immediately impressed by Catherine Zeta-Jones’ skill at belting out a tune or Richard Gere’s surprisingly decent tap dancing, “Chicago” might well be a less enthralling experience.

Unlike Luhrmann’s witty and frenetic deconstructionist flick, Marshall’s “Chicago” is a traditional send-up of the stage production. The tongue in cheek affair revolves around two women vying for fame and fortune in the Windy City circa the 1920s. Renee Zellweger stars as Roxie Hart, a chorus singer who has dreams of starring in her own solo act. When Roxie shoots her lover in a fit of rage, she winds up in jail alongside a crew of murderesses who have all taken out a cheating man. Making the unwanted acquaintance of former headliner and current tabloid sensation Velma Kelly (Zeta-Jones), Roxie quickly learns that the key to freedom is getting her name in the paper because, in Chicago, people love a scandal even more than justice. So, with her doormat husband (John C. Reilly) footing the bill, Roxie hires the fast-talking and successful lawyer Billy Flynn (Richard Gere) to take her case. And soon enough Roxie is the girl of the moment, stealing Velma’s spotlight in a bizarre media frenzy where there’s no such thing as bad press.

For those who loved “Chicago” on stage,

Marshall’s rendition of the musical will be a treat. What “Chicago” boasts is strong performances (Zellweger and Zeta-Jones really can sing), high production values and a seamless fluidity. Most impressively, Marshall manages to make the musical numbers naturally ease into the action and to one another. That said, the film does leave you with the feeling that all this jazz would still be better on Broadway.

Once the amazement of seeing these actors sing wears off (and, to be fair, it doesn’t until well into the film when John C. Reilly pulls off his solo – who knew the indie darling could carry a tune?), “Chicago” feels bland and familiar. In the end, it takes more than a catchy lyric and decent dance number to make a musical work onscreen, and I’m already dreading the day when we see Jim Carrey starring in the film adaptation of “Oklahoma.”

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Music

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N

2003 Choice Awards Gala Celebrates Local Musicians

I

t may be a little early for the Grammys, but it’s just the right time to catch another music awards show – Lokal Loudness style.

The 2003 Choice Awards Gala will be at Crossroads Feb. 1, and it’s your chance to come out and see just who Augusta’s favorite musicians are. Awards for 10 categories will be given out, along with two special achievement awards. Seven bands are also scheduled to perform.

Visitors to local musician Stoney Cannon’s Web site, www.lokalloudness.cjb.net, provided write-in votes for a number of categories, which in turn provided a list of nominees and, of course, the winners.

“It’s odd, cause when you say nominations, I put up an open poll in September. They filled in the blank on each category, and the voting was up until midnight New Year’s,” says Stoney. “Basically, what you have there are your top five, four, six – depending on the category – vote-getters for each category. We kind of took a different approach. Your nominees are your top five vote-getters, and that night, we’ll let you know who actually got the most votes. We figured everybody deserved some recognition.”

The nominees encompass a variety of sounds and styles – everything from Tara Scheyer to Jemani. Jemani, perennial Augusta favorites, clock in with a healthy six nominations, as does The Big Mighty. 420 Outback leads the pack with nine nominations – they’re even up against themselves in the Favorite Song category.

“They are the hot band at the moment, it seems like,” Stoney says.

Perhaps that’s why 420 Outback is one of the acts scheduled to perform at the awards ceremony. They join the Livingroom Legends, Juice, Happy Bones, Black-Eyed Susan, Neato Torpedo and Damn Skippy.

“We’re going to have a couple bands play, starting at eight,” says Stoney. “The first artist is an acoustic three-piece called

JEMANI Damn Skippy. And then Livingroom Legends is going to play.”

The rest of the groups will play in between the awards, which will be presented in groups of three.

“We’re also having two specialty awards,” Stoney says. One, the Merritt Award, is named after local musician Chuck Merritt.

The other is a special Comeback of the Year Award. “We’ve never done a Comeback of the Year Award.” Last year, to mark the 10th anniversary of Lokal Loudness, special awards were

2 3

BY LISA JORDAN

given out for Band of the Decade, Person of the Decade, Song of the Decade and CD of the Decade. But, as Stoney says with a laugh, “We can only do that every 10 years.”

The awards themselves, he says, are very cool. “It’s got the Lokal Loudness logo etched into it,” he says. “It’s a very rock ‘n’ roll-looking piece.”

Only Stoney and the person who verified his count know for sure who will be taking home those awards next weekend, and he resisted The Spirit’s attempts to pry the information out of him. But he would say that the voting was awfully close.

“Every time I counted, which is three times, I had somebody back me up,” Stoney says. “It was tight. Nobody ran away with anything. Every race was very tight, to the point that we almost thought we had a tie in one category.”

To coincide with the awards, Stoney also has a special treat planned. Noon on Feb. 1 marks the opening of his Lokal Loudness Words and Music store on Broad Street.

“It’s actually going to be one of the few days that it actually closes earlier than regular store hours,” he says. “For a while, I’ve been wanting to open something downtown, ‘cause I love downtown.”

Though Stoney plans to sell a few CDs, Lokal Loudness Words and Music isn’t a record store. “It’s all music-related – CDs, DVDs, books, magazines, T-shirts and beanie caps, collectables like lunchboxes and shot glasses, a lot of local CDs, stuff like that. Music accessories like guitar strings, picks, et cetera, for bands that are playing late on the weekend.”

Though it’s getting crowded, Stoney’s plate isn’t full just yet.

“Actually, what I’m really excited about is, not only are we opening the store, not only are we having the awards show, Lokal Loudness is also going to have some stuff at the Museum of History,” he says. It’s in conjunction with the “Thirty Years of Rock and Roll: Photography by Larry Hulst” exhibit.

For more information on the awards show and what else Lokal Loudness has planned for 2003, visit www.lokalloudness.cjb.net.

2003 Choice Awards Gala Nominees Favorite Drummer Brian Allen – Neato Torpedo J.J. Bower – The Riff Raff Kings Ryan Henderson – 420 Outback Jordan Leopard – Jemani Jason Neal – The Big Mighty Favorite Bassist Al Beasley – The Vellotones Joe Bone – 420 Outback Jason Guy – Jemani Travis Petrea – Horsepower Levi Pulaski – The Big Mighty Favorite Guitarist Mike Baideme – Black-Eyed Susan Adam Hatfield – The Big Mighty Elliot Holden – Elliot Holden Group

Doug James – 420 Outback Sonny Won – Jemani Favorite Vocalist Andrew Benjamin – The Hellblinki Sextet Brandon Bower – The Big Mighty Ike Isaac – Jemani Gabe Miller – 420 Outback Jason Peck – SPYT Favorite Miscellaneous Instrumentalist Dane Boue – The Vellotones Liz Hodges – Juice Dale Lowe – Jemani John Madden – 420 Outback John Watkins – The Big Mighty Henry Wynn – Solo

Favorite Solo Artist Patrick Blanchard Keith Gregory Tara Scheyer Joe Stevenson Favorite Song “10:01” – SPYT “Down With the DL” – Drop Level “Foggy” – 420 Outback “Hit” – 420 Outback “Whitney Larue” – Livingroom Legends Favorite CD “CDXX” – 420 Outback “Honeymoon” – Livingroom Legends “Proposes a Toast” – Neato Torpedo

“Psychosis” – Drop Level “Wheresville Sessions” – Juice Favorite New Band Absint Drop Level Juice Livingroom Legends Lythium Favorite Band 420 Outback The Big Mighty Jemani Neato Torpedo SPYT

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J

ust a scant three years ago, JOHN MAYER was a starving singer-songwriter in Atlanta. Performing for mostly indifferent audiences in places such as Eddie’s Attic and Smith’s Olde Bar, Mayer’s career was going nowhere really fast. A low-budget CD, “Inside Wants Out” (which was recently reissued), had just been released to universal indifference, and the former Berklee student’s prospects were almost as bleak as the chances for “Pluto Nash 2.”

Now in 2003, Mayer’s career has gone from SOL to DVD. Of course, “Music for Squares” and its attendant singles, “No Such Thing” and “Your Body Is a Wonderland,” have made the former Georgian the darling of the DAVE MATTHEWS set. The Grammy-nominated disc has led to “Any Given Thursday,” a combination DVD/VHS/CD that documents a Sept. 12 show in Birmingham. Two previously unreleased originals, “Something’s Missing” and “Lenny/Man on the Side,” along with a perfunctory cover of the Police hit “Message in a Bottle,” are included.

Look for the discs Feb. 11.

Jim Morrison Returns? Dept.

A couple of years ago CREED frontman SCOTT STAPP joined the surviving members of THE DOORS for a memorable VH1 “Storytellers” episode. Maybe a bit of the lizard king jumped into Stapp’s soul, as a bizarre gig last month in Chicago has thousands of fans complaining and demanding their money back.

Stapp, who was described by one fan as being “high out of his mind,” fell down several times during the evening (gotta watch that Advil) and repeatedly forgot words to songs that he had written in the first place. To make things even worse, Stapp left the stage for over ten minutes, leaving his fellow band members to fend for themselves in front of an extremely pissed-off crowd. Medical and health problems were blamed for Stapp’s unprofessional behavior.

Maybe they’ll both wear makeup. The biggest classic rock tour of the year was announced last week, but you’ll have to wait a while for the clash of personalities. KISS and AEROSMITH will hit the sheds this summer for a three-month trek around the States.

The bands, who grossed a combined $100 million on their last individual tours, might even perform in a few large stadiums along the way, which might be the only venues big enough for each group’s massive ego. GENE SIMMONS and STEVEN TYLER in the same

BY

JOHN MAYER

house? Someone call fight promoter Don King and call him quick!

JANIS JOPLIN would have been 60 years old last week, but a heroin overdose in 1970 cut down her career just as it was hitting its peak.

A new double-disc set of the Texas blues singer’s best has just been issued and is packed with some terrific performances. “Cry Baby,” “Get it While You Can,” “Mercedes Benz,” and her posthumouly-released #1 single “Me and Bobby McGee” are included.

Several unreleased songs are also in the package. Her various backing ensembles weren’t always the tightest (BIG BROTHER AND THE HOLDING COMPANY were really sloppy) but her in-your-face soulful blues wailing is always worth your bucks.

Turner’s Quick Notes The original JOE JACKSON BAND (“Is She Really Going Out With Him?”) has reformed and have 2003 tour plans and a new album in the works ... This cell’s for you. R&B singer LOU RAWLS was booked last week on charges of domestic battery ... PHISH covered LITTLE FEAT’S “Time Loves a Hero” at their New Year’s Eve show at Madison Square Garden ... Local rockers THE BIG MIGHTY continue to impress at a recent weekend gig at Crossroads. Guitarist ADAM HATFIELD is one of the most soulful players anywhere ...

Turner’s Rock and Roll Jeopardy A. This has been the only band in the history of “Saturday Night Live” to lip-sync to their music.

Q. Who is ABBA?

ED TURNER

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Visit us online. For all the latest in Arts, Entertainment and Local Events. Visit our website at metspirit.com.

Chrissie Hynde of The Pretenders Keeps on Breaking New Ground

BY LISA JORDAN

C

hrissie Hynde is The Pretenders. As the only member of the original lineup still standing – guitarist James Honeymann-Scott and bassist Pete Farndon both died of drug overdoses in the early 1980s and drummer Martin Chambers was fired from the group in 1994 – Hynde continues to make music with unapologetic rawness.

“Loose Screw,” an album The Pretenders released in November, 2002, chronicles the emotional ups and downs following a failed relationship. Even if, at times, it may seem Hynde has lost her edge, she never completely abandons the in-your-face punk rock ethic that characterized The Pretenders in the first place.

A native of Akron, Ohio, Hynde made the trek to England in the 1970s, penning articles as a rock journalist for British papers and later working in Malcolm McLaren’s famed “Sex” clothing boutique. Both jobs landed her square in the middle of England’s burgeoning punk scene, and a 1978 record deal made Hynde the first artist on Real Records and forced her to put together a group, originally composed of herself, Honeymann-Scott, Farndon and Chambers.

The Pretenders achieved moderate success with their first hit single, “Brass in

Pocket,” and in the 1980s, “Back on the Chain Gang,” from the album “Learning To Crawl,” became the band’s biggest hit – it was recorded with the two surviving original members, Hynde and Chambers, and studio musicians. The 1980s also marked a Pretenders sound that leaned more toward pop than punk, perhaps accounting for their successes during that era.

Hynde took some time off from the music business to raise her two daughters, products of a romance with the Kinks’ Ray Davies and a marriage to Simple Minds’ Jim Kerr; she also became heavily involved in activism, speaking for both People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) and vegetarianism. Hynde has also enjoyed success with solo projects, recording film and television theme songs and working on duets and cover songs.

Even though time and motherhood seem to have mellowed out Hynde a bit, her tough-girl sexuality and distinctive vocals remain intact. Though in interviews, she insists that her gender makes her music anything but groundbreaking (a Paper magazine interview quotes Hynde as saying, “If anything, I’ve been traditional. I’m in your typical four-piece rock band, and as it so happened, no chicks ever applied for the job”), legions of Hynde’s female rock descendants

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

would argue otherwise.

The Pretenders are serving up a heaping helping of rock history on their current U.S. tour. Hynde and company will arrive at the Tabernacle in Atlanta Jan.

27. The show begins at 8 p.m., and tickets are currently available through TicketMaster for $35 apiece. To order, visit www.ticketmaster.com or charge by phone at 828-7700.

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Night Life

J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

The Shack - DJ Billy Soul Bar - Live Jazz

Thursday, 23rd

The Bee’s Knees - 12 Tone Lounge Blind Pig - Mojo Chicken Blues Band Cadillac’s - New Day Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford Continuum - Playa*Listic Thursday Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Fox’s Lair - Karaoke Garden City Bar and Grill - Karaoke with Mad Dog Mike Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Three Six ty, Guest DJ Playground - Open Mic Night The Shack - DJ Billy Soul Bar - The Hellblinki Sex tet, Dead Meadow Time Piecez - DJ Dance Par ty Whiskey Junction - DJ Chaos Whiskey Road Oyster Factory - Wayne Capps

Friday, 24th

The Bee’s Knees - Tara Scheyer Blind Pig - Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips Borders - Savannah Rivergrass Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford Club Argos - Talent Show Coconuts - DJs Doug and Eric Continuum - Heavy Dose Cotton Patch - Red-Headed Stepchild Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - Drop Level Cue & Brew - Karaoke with DJ MJ D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Five Pines Saloon - The Hard Times Band Fox’s Lair - Thom Carlton Garden City Bar and Grill - Karaoke Greene Streets - Karaoke Highlander - Basikaly Honk y Tonk - Danny Rhea and the Empty Pockets Joe’s Underground - Black-Eyed Susan Last Call - Sulcus Groove, DJ Richie Rich Metro Coffeehouse - College Radio Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Dance Par ty with DJ Boriqua The Shack - DJ Buckwheat Soul Bar - (r)evolution with DJ JR Treybon’s Backstreet Lounge - Sassy Brass and the Recaps Whiskey Junction - Needless, DJ Paul Whiskey Road Oyster Factory - Weston & Preston

Saturday, 25th

The Bee’s Knees - Sweet Nuthin’ Saturday Blind Pig - Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips Borders - Jeremy Carr Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford

Upcoming

Battery - Crossroads - Feb. 12 13th Annual Miss Valentine’s Day Pageant Coliseum - Feb. 14 Jerry Halliday - Club Argos - Feb. 15 Southern Soul Festival - Augusta-Richmond County Civic Center - Feb. 21

Elsewhere

Shelley Watkins’ new band, New Day, makes its debut at Cadillac’s Jan. 23.

Club Argos - Shirley Q. Liquor Coconuts - DJs Doug and Eric Coliseum - Male Revue: Beau and the Boys Continuum - The Hellblinki Sex tet, Siclid Cotton Patch - Red-Headed Stepchild Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - Bind, 420 Outback D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Five Pines Saloon - The Hard Times Band Fox’s Lair - Live Enter tainment Garden City Bar and Grill - Karaoke with Mad Dog Mike Greene Streets - Karaoke Honk y Tonk - Danny Rhea and the Empty Pockets Joe’s Underground - John Last Call - Natural Desire, DJ Richie Rich Metro Coffeehouse - Live Bluegrass with Eryn Eubanks and the Fold Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Miami Night with DJ Boriqua The Shack - DJ Buckwheat Soul Bar - ph Balance, The Ear thling Treybon’s Backstreet Lounge - Sassy Brass and the Recaps Whiskey Junction - Needless

Sunday, 26th

Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford and The Last Bohemian Quar tet Hangnail Gallery - Ly thium, Apocalyptic Prophecy Brigade Pizza Joint - Patrick Blanchard The Shack - Karaoke with Buckwheat and Doober Somewhere in Augusta - Super Bowl Par ty Whiskey Junction - Karaoke by Tom

Monday, 27th

Blind Pig - Acoustic Monday Continuum - Monday Madness with Perry Anderson Crossroads - Dance Par ty with DJ Chris Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Mike Baideme Metro Coffeehouse - Tear in My Beer Classic Country The Shack - DJ Billy

Tuesday, 28th

Adams Nightclub - Karaoke with Bill Tolber t The Bee’s Knees - Mellow Sounds Blind Pig - Any thing Goes Tuesday with Buzz and Friends D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Ruskin Metro Coffeehouse - Irish Music with Sibin Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock The Shack - DJ Billy

Wednesday, 29th

The Bee’s Knees - Blue in Green Blind Pig - Sweeny Continuum - Open Mic Night Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - The Family Trucksters D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - John Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Theology On Tap: “First Comes Love” Playground - Karaoke

Trapt - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 23 North Mississippi All-Stars - Georgia Theatre, Athens, Ga. - Jan. 24 Coldplay - BJCC Concer t Hall, Birmingham, Ala. - Jan 24; Grady Cole Center, Charlot te, N.C. Jan. 25 moe. - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - Jan. 24-25 Dodd Ferrelle and the Tinfoil Stars - Tasty World, Athens, Ga. - Jan. 25 Honda Battle of the Bands - Georgia Dome, Atlanta - Jan. 25 Ferron - Red Light Cafe, Atlanta - Jan. 25 Richard Bickness and the Shameless Lovers Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Jan. 25 The Pretenders - The Tabernacle, Atlanta Jan. 27 Finch - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 28 Mad Margritt - The Maple Street Mansion, Atlanta - Jan. 30 Todd Rundgren - Rox y Theatre, Atlanta Jan. 31 Mac McAnally - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta Jan. 31 Avail - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 31 Monte Montgomery - Red Light Cafe, Atlanta Feb. 1 Jorma Kaukonen - Variety Playhouse - Feb. 1 Jimmy Buffett - Philips Arena, Atlanta - Feb. 1; The Carolina Center, Columbia, S.C. - Feb. 5 Lyricist Lounge - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Feb. 2 Malevolent Creation - Masquerade, Atlanta Feb. 2 Elliot - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Feb. 3 David Gray - Fox Theatre, Atlanta - Feb. 4 Big Head Todd and the Monsters - Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - Feb. 5 Jack Russell’s Great White - Riviera Club, Atlanta - Feb. 5 Trust Company - Masquerade, Atlanta - Feb. 5; 40 Wat t Club, Athens, Ga. - Feb. 6 Swinging Medallions - Cowboys Atlanta, Kennesaw, Ga. - Feb. 7 Ja Rule, Eve, The Roots, Jurassic 5, Biz Markie, MC Doug E. Fresh - Americasmar t, Atlanta - Feb. 7 Austin Lounge Lizards - Red Light Cafe, Atlanta - Feb. 7 Wayman Tisdale, George Duke - Dekalb Atlanta Center, Atlanta - Feb. 7 Dave Matthews Cover Band - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Feb. 8 Papa Roach - Eleven50 Club, Atlanta - Feb. 12

continued on page 46

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45 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

46 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N

2 0 0 3

Photo by Jeff Miles

2 3

(L) The Hellblinki Sextet performs twice this week: Thursday at the Soul Bar and Saturday at Club Continuum. (R)The Soul Bar welcomes ph Balance Jan. 25. continued from page 44 Kasey Chambers - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta Feb. 12 Bon Jovi, The Goo Goo Dolls - Philips Arena, Atlanta - Feb. 13 Henry Rollins Spoken Word - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Feb. 13 Jump, Little Children - Georgia Theatre, Athens, Ga. - Feb. 13 Marvin Sease - Macon City Auditorium, Macon, Ga. - Feb. 14 Nile - Masquerade, Atlanta - Feb. 14 David Allan Coe - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta Feb. 14; Georgia Theatre, Athens, Ga. - Feb. 15

Erykah Badu - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - Feb. 14 Long Beach Short Bus - Masquerade, Atlanta Feb. 15 Juliana Theor y - Rox y Theatre, Atlanta Feb. 18 Mission of Burma - Echo Lounge, Atlanta Feb. 20 Dirty Dozen Brass Band - Georgia Theatre, Athens, Ga. - Feb. 20; Cot ton Club, Atlanta Feb. 21 George Strait - The Arena at Gwinnet t Center, Duluth, Ga. - Feb. 21 Gary Allan - Cowboys Atlanta, Kennesaw, Ga. Feb. 21

Susan Tedeschi - Rox y Theatre, Atlanta Feb. 22 Steve Earle - Variet y Playhouse, Atlanta Feb. 22 Engelbert Humperdinck - Gaillard Auditorium, Charleston, S.C. - Feb. 26 Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band - The Arena at Gwinnet t Center, Duluth, Ga. - Feb. 28 Bill Gaither and Friends - Charlot te Coliseum, Charlot te, N.C. - March 7 The Smiling Assassins - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - March 8 Les Nubians - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - March 8 Grenadier Guards - Fox Theatre, Atlanta -

March 9 Yanni - Philips Arena, Atlanta - March 11 Many tickets are available through TicketMaster outlets, by calling 828-7700, or online at w w w.ticketmaster.com. Tickets may also be available through Tix Online by calling 278-4TIX or online at w w w.tixonline.com. Night Life listings are subject to change without notice.

Deadline for inclusion in Night Life calendar is Tuesday at 4 p.m. Contact Rhonda Jones or Lisa Jordan by calling 738-1142, fa xing 736-0443 or e-mailing to rhonda_jones@metspirit.com or lisa_jordan@metspirit.com.

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News of the

Weird P

unta Gorda, Fla., inmate James “Happy” Borland, 41, suffered a near-fatal concussion in December from being roughed up by inmates Lemuel “K-Money” Ware, 32, and Corey Andrews, 32, because Borland had accused Ware of stealing his pet spider and renaming it “Pinky.”

According to a Florida Department of Law Enforcement report, Borland had demanded his spider back, but Andrews intervened.

Ware, who said he had purchased the spider fair and square, felt he had to go after Borland because Pinky (in a small box in Ware’s shirt pocket) “told” him to.

• After the police chief of Portland, Ore., defied a local judge and said he would continue to examine suspicious people’s garbage without search warrants (because, he contends, curbside garbage is public property), reporters from the local Willamette Week newspaper examined (under cover of night) a December day’s curbside garbage thrown out by the chief, the district attorney and the mayor (who is officially the chief’s boss). The newspaper published an inventory of each official’s trash, finding much banality (e.g., what the mayor planned to watch on TV) but nothing illegal or improper. When told what the reporters did, the police chief got hostile, and the mayor, said the reporters, “went nuclear.”

Readers’ Choice • The former Bob Craft filed a lawsuit in November against the owners of the reckless-stunt-filled MTV program (and movie) “Jackass,” claiming it has defamed him, in that five years ago, he had his own name legally changed to “Jack Ass,” which he thought would call attention to his national campaign against drunk driving. Ass, who lives in Montana and filed the lawsuit there, claims that the TV show and movie have damaged his reputation (“which I have worked so hard to create,” he wrote) to the tune of at least $10 million.

Government in Action • London’s Observer reported in November that the British government is exploring whether to require convicted pedophiles to receive microchip implants that would allow them to be tracked by satellite after their release from prison. The government would know not only whether pedophiles visited schools or parks but, based on a proposal by one company whose software monitors astronauts’ bodily functions in space, whether the pedophiles are feeling nervous or excited (but so far, sexual arousal cannot be tracked by the software).

• State authorities raided a Honolulu artifacts dealer in December and filed criminal charges against him for possession of rare or extinct birds without a state license.

However, as dealer Don Medcalf pointed out to them at the time (to no avail), not

only are the rare birds merely stuffed animals, but they were killed and stuffed sometime in the 1800s, not only before the possession law was passed but before Hawaii was even a state. In January, the prosecutor dropped the case because he “felt (the charges) wouldn’t be proven beyond a reasonable doubt.”

• Immigration and Naturalization Service is being incorporated into the Department of Homeland Security just in time. In November, INS revealed that it had routinely granted citizenship to a man with ties to the radical Islamic group Hezbollah during a time that he was under direct scrutiny by a joint FBI-NYPD terrorist task force. One week after that, a General Accounting Office review found that INS could not find nearly half of the 4,100 supposedly registered immigrants that the federal government wanted to interview in the days after Sept. 11 because the agency had been so lax in enforcing the registration law.

Great Art! • For 12 days in November, Yugoslav performance artist Marina Abramovic, 56, confined herself to three raised desks at a New York City gallery, where she denied herself all external stimulation (except being stared at by visitors), subsisting on water, and carrying on all bodily functions in full public view, in order to heighten her senses so that, she said, she and the audience could efficiently transmit energy between them.

(Previously, for the same purpose, she and a partner sat at ends of a long table for seven hours, not moving and trying not even to blink.)

• In September, art student Nathan Banks, 22 (of New York’s Purchase College), painted randomly chosen words on about 60 meandering cows in order to see if they would inadvertently line up to form poetry.

At about the same time, in England, writer Valerie Laws, 48, did the same thing with sheep (except that she chose the words of only one poem, to see if the sheep could form another poem). An arts council granted Ms. Laws about $3,400 for her project, which she said would break down the boundaries between “literature” and “quantum mechanics.”

Creme de la Weird • According to police in Red Bluff, Calif., Andrew McCrae killed one of their officers in November and fled to Concord, N.H., where he was arrested a few days later.

According to his Web site postings, McCrae (a former “human shield” in Israel) thought the alleged murder would create sympathy for his views on war, police brutality, globalization and corporate social irresponsibility.

He allegedly told friends that he was immune from prosecution because he had had the foresight to incorporate himself beforehand in a state other than California (corporate name: Proud and Insolent Youth).

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Recurring Themes • Ng Lai Ping, 39, complained in October that an official at Hong Kong’s Central Library had demanded that she stop breastfeeding her child in public and gave as the reason signs posted at various places in the building, “No Food or Drinks.” And Arab News reported in December that a hospital in Jidda, Saudi Arabia, had refused to hand over the body of a deceased baby until after father Wajeeh Suleiman (of Turkey) pays his bill of about $48,000 (U.S.).

— Chuck Shepherd © United Press Syndicate

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S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

In one of your past lives you may have been a peasant who worked as a scullery maid at a rural castle and never traveled more than five miles from home your whole life. Or perhaps you were the sickly bastard child of a nun and monk, confined to bed and taught by private tutors in a remote section of the monastery. Scenarios like that would explain why you now have the privilege of being a proud, free, strong-willed and adventurous Aries. You must have paid your karmic debt last time around! Get ready to really capitalize on the old days in the next few weeks. I believe you’re about to harvest a blessing that you earned during your difficult past.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

In 1997, Jody Williams won the Nobel Peace Prize for her work to persuade more than 100 countries to ban deadly land mines. When she held a press conference at the end of a dirt road near her Vermont farmhouse, she was barefoot and wore jeans and a tank top. It reflected the unassuming nature that had served her so well during years of dogged efforts to change the world. I nominate this ordinary hero to be your role model in the coming weeks, Taurus. According to my reading of the astrological omens, your gradual, matter-of-fact persistence will give you the power to make a fundamental improvement in the way your environment reflects your ideals.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

Feeling daunted by looming decisions? I’m happy to inform you that you’ll discover helpful clues in places where you’d normally never look. In fact, the further outside your usual sphere you go, the more likely you are to find exactly what you need.

Here are a few suggestions to whet your imagination: Pore over the journals of American pioneers Lewis and Clark; ask a professional baker to create a loaf of bread from scratch right in front of your eyes; gaze at the planet Jupiter through a powerful

telescope; go to a high perch where you can see for miles and miles.

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

The passage below was written by the poet James Tate. As you read it, I’d like you to imagine that it describes an unfinished metaphor for a situation you’re actually involved in. Then write a few sentences in which you speculate on what will happen next. Here’s the passage: “Mostly we were able to ignore the hairy thing in the corner. It seemed to be leaking some green fluid, but we could walk around that. It gave off an unpleasant odor, a cross between Limburger cheese and a decomposing skunk, but we never mentioned it. We didn’t seem to have a plan for getting rid of it. It wasn’t really hurting anybody. And then one day I thought I heard it singing. And another day it seemed to say I love you.”

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

Below are a few events that the cosmos is conspiring to put on your schedule in the coming weeks.

You could postpone them until later in the year, but I believe you’ll have best results if you surrender to their necessity in the near future. 1. Open your heart as far as it’ll go without ripping it apart. 2.

Dive into a whirlpool of emotions without being pulled to the bottom or swept away. 3. Deepen and intensify a juicy relationship with a worthy ally, but without distorting your relationship with yourself.

4. Get smarter about love than you ever dreamed it was possible to be.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

You may be able to elude the cosmic jokes that are brewing in your vicinity. Your intelligence is both crafty and practical these days, and it could very well keep you consistently in the right places at the right times. But in order to grab an extra advantage in your guerrilla battle with the forces of mischief, I suggest you indulge regularly in a good, long primal scream. Go out in the middle of the woods if necessary, or find a sanctuary where no one will

call the cops: Just find a way to unleash a soulcleansing howl that will flush away your festering anxieties. There’s no better technique for making yourself unappealing to rascally demons and pests.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

“After several hours of careful rumination and a difficult weighing of the possibilities,” said a character on the TV show “Frasier,” “I have decided to be playful today.” This is the exact approach I recommend for you in the coming week, Libra. Be disciplined in your preparations for a wild release.

Carefully organize the events that will allow you to explode in joyous spontaneity. Think long and hard about how you can bring more fertile, rejuvenating chaos into your life.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Here’s one of my favorite paradoxes. All of us are eminently fallible nobodies. We’re crammed with delusions and base emotions. We give ourselves more slack than we ever give anyone else, and we’re brilliant at justifying our irrational biases with seemingly logical explanations. And yet it’s equally true that every one of us is a glorious creation unlike any other in the history of the world.

We’re all stars with inexhaustible potential, gods and goddesses in the making. This week, Scorpio, I suspect you will vividly embody this paradox, as you range from the ignominious depths to the breathtaking heights.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

To celebrate his birthday last month, 7-year-old Sagittarian Michael Wong-Sasso invited 40 kids to a party at his favorite spot: the Sunshine Canyon Landfill near Los Angeles. “I like putting trash where it belongs,” he told a reporter. “I like making the world cleaner. Recycling is good for all the people in the world.” I hope that you Archers are infected with a similar passion in the coming week.

Judging from the cosmic omens, I’d say this is an excellent time for you to get really excited about throwing away stuff you no longer need. Staging a bash at your local garbage dump may be a bit much, but how about getting together with your Sagittarian friends and sympathizers for a Purge the Junk Party?

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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Your birthday season begins now, Aquarius. It doesn’t matter whether the official date is today or in 25 days: You have astrological permission and poetic license to launch the celebration immediately and not finish up until February 18.

May I suggest a few gifts you might give yourself in the course of this glorious personal festival? To start off, present yourself with something luxurious, sensual, and elegant. Two days later, treat yourself to something bold, brash, and bright. Next, how about a legal high? And after that, maybe a secret weapon, followed by a magical tool, and then a map to buried treasure.

Before you’re done almost four weeks from now, I hope you will have blessed yourself with at least seven exciting surprises.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

Good news for all you hard-driving stress managers who think you’re wasting time if you’re not doing two tasks at once: In the next few weeks, you’ll be working hard even while you’re fast asleep. Due to an unprecedented confluence of your unconscious and conscious minds, your dreams will produce a number of lucid revelations about your knottiest dilemmas. So please have a pen and notebook by your bed to scrawl down fleeting gems. And clear your schedule each morning so you can devote at least a half an hour to problem-solving while your nighttime insights are still fresh. Even if you don’t actually remember your dreams, their rich afterimages will be with you subliminally, giving your analytical mind a boost.

— © Rob Brezsny You Can Call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your Expanded Weekly Horoscope

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CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

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from seemingly ordinary events. You’ll get more done in less time and draw more delight than usual from familiar pleasures. Sleep will be deeper and your dreamers richer, and therefore you may be able to go to bed later and wake up earlier. Your body will extract more nutrients from the food you eat, and you’ll be able to suck secrets from even the most impenetrable mysteries.

I predict that you’ll be able to squeeze blood out of a turnip this week. You’ll derive dramatic lessons

ACROSS 32 Race with flags 63 Muslim leader 1 Old ship’s cargo 34 Sliding rod in an 64 Loads of mutual

New York Times Crossword Puzzle

48

P A P A L A N A M E B C D R O M E K T R A T L Y O N A S E O U S E O N S I N X R T I A N O T S O D N O V I C E S E S A U F R A N C A S I D E T O D O S

funds 65 Whence St. Catherine 66 Suffix with fluor67 Slug follower 68 It starts and ends seven answers in this puzzle

1

2

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4

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DOWN 1 Role played by everyone, it’s said 2 “Satires” author 3 Got around 4 Follow-up: Abbr.

5 Instant 6 Four years, maybe 7 Looking down from 8 Biker women 9 Puts into position, in a way 10 Alewife’s cousin 11 Detroit’s founder 12 “Yadda, yadda, yadda” 13 Soft powder 22 Early aft.

23 Green Wave’s home 25 Mint supplies 30 Impressionist 31 Précis 33 In a crowd of 35 Rarin’ to go

9

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53 58

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Puzzle by Michael Shteyman

36 Walk-way

42 Popular comic

38 It provides no

43 Irritate

connector outlets

39 Regardless of

the fact that, briefly

40 Old-fashioned

warnings

book since 1942

46 Kitchen thingie 47 It may be run 48 Crêpe suzette

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51 Babe Ruth, for

the Yankees

53 What online

shoppers may spend

55 Words of

wistfulness

56 Does perfectly 57 Like tundras 62 Carrier to

Karachi

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J A N 2 3

T

oday was my 21st birthday.

To celebrate, I took my fiancée to karaoke. The DJ, who’s female, usually gives lap dances with seductive songs. I promised my fiancée I wouldn’t get one. Before I sang, the DJ announced it was my birthday, and said she had a surprise for me. I looked at her and said, “No,” but she said it wasn’t what I thought. She pulled out a chair and had me sit in it, then played a song. Well, she ended up giving me a lap dance, and my fiancée stormed out. After the song ended, I ran after her. When I found her, miles across town, she just yelled about my broken promise and how I’m pretty much chopped liver to her now. Well, what was I supposed to do? I was on the spot in front of a crowd. Now I’m losing the woman I want to marry. Is this fixable?

—Singing the Code Blues There are times you have to jump to conclusions, and there are times you only have to lean a lit tle. When you go to the dentist, for example, there’s a very, very good chance he’ll star t stabbing at your molars, not strap you to the chair, speed to your apar tment, break in, and shampoo your rugs.

Likewise, when a lap-dancing DJ of fers you a seat on stage, it probably isn’t because she wants you to be a lit tle more comfor table while everyone watches you do your ta xes or scale fish.

The way you tell it, you were the poor, unwit ting victim of a lap dancing accident.

Oh, please. Sometimes, yes, life does throw a guy a curve ball. And sometimes, as in your case, a guy gets advance notice that a curve ball could be coming his way. Like, how advance? Like, when the leather for the ball was still at tached to the cow.

If keeping your promise meant any thing, you would’ve had a Plan B in your back pocket in case it looked like you were going to get lapped. You might’ve been ready to delete your lap, and hence, your lap dance, by standing up. You might’ve prepared some corny ego-preserver, like “I’m a one-woman lap dance man, and this position’s been taken.” But, not only were you Plan B-free, you waited until the song ended to go af ter your girlfriend. You WAITED UNTIL THE SONG ENDED!? Now, there’s every lit tle girl’s

dream — the knight on a white horse who will gallop across time and space to save her ... just as soon as his lap dance ends.

It’s time to cough up the truth — to yourself and to your girlfriend — that you made a promise you thought you could snake out of by making like you were lap-jacked.

Apologize, and tell her you never truly realized what she meant to you until it looked like you’d lost her. Swear you’ll never lie to her again — that you’ll do the grown-up thing and discuss an issue, instead of saying one thing and slithering of f and doing the opposite. (It’s best if all this is sincere — not just a prepared statement you’re reading of f your hand.) Grovel. Grovel more. For st yle suggestions, look in the Yellow Pages under “florists,” and rent “Say Any thing” and fast-forward to John Cusack playing “In Your Eyes” on a boombox under Ione Sk ye’s window.

If, af ter all this, you do get her back, but get right back to lying, take heed. It’s probably a sign you’re in need of serious medical at tention: a brain scan from the proper doctor — which, in this case, would be a proctologist.

This guy and I dated for five months, then, one day, we were supposed to do something, and I just never heard from him. Never again. Maybe he met somebody else. But, he was really into me — would he be completely over me that fast? Also, from what I know, this isn’t like him — he’s very polite.

Should I call him, just to get him out of my system? I miss him terribly, but shouldn’t he be the one to call me?

—On Hold This sounds like a really bad case of dandruf f that, lef t untreated, leads to a need to amputate your head. First, he didn’t show.

Then, he couldn’t call because he didn’t show. Then, he couldn’t call because he didn’t call ... and so on, and so on. Going on the assumption that you’re right about his niceguy-ness, you should call him — sans fangs, bygones-be-bygones — tell him you miss him, and would like to get together. I’m not suggesting you sign up for doormat duty — just do a lit tle fact-finding to see whether you’ve got a bad guy on your hands, or a guy who’s simply bad at dealing with conflict.

— © 2003, Amy Alkon

Got A Problem?

Write Amy Alkon

171 Pier Ave., Box 280 • Santa Monica, CA 90405 or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com

2 4 6 B O B B Y J O N E S E X P R E S S WAY • 8 6 8 - 1 5 0 8

Free Automotive Ads For Our Readers SEE SEE PAGE PAGE 4253

2 0 0 3

S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

Classifieds Business Opportunity $$$JOB SECURITY IS GONE! Financial security is available!

Free Booklet. Full Training.

Home-Based Business. www.livingezstreet.com 888-576-1940 (1/30#7954)

Help Wanted 23 People needed to lose 5-100 pounds.

Eileen lost 23 lbs. her first month.

All natural, 100% Guaranteed.

Call 1-888-253-1682 www.healthystar t21.com (1/30#7966)

Equipment BUY FACTORY DIRECT WOLFF TANNING BEDS Payments From $25/month FREE Color Catolog Call Today 1-800-842-1310 www.np.etstan.com (03/27#7924)

Medical Research If you have chronic headaches, regardless of severity, you may be eligible for admission to a non-drug VA and MCG study. Biofeedback or relaxation treatments are provided at no cost, and subjects may receive a fee for completing study requirements. Please call (706) 733-0188, extension 2678, for additional information.

(03/06#7955)

Wheels

Dead Bodies Wanted

We want your dead junk or scrap car bodies.

We tow away and for some we pay.

706/829-2676

OR

706/798-9060

Yard Sales CHURCH WIDE RUMMAGE SALE Saturday, Februay 1st 8:00 am - 1:00 pm Vineyard Church 3126 Parrish Road, Augusta, GA (behind Dairy Queen on Washington Road) In Doors/ Rain or Shine (01/23#7958) FREE Pickup of large items for upcoming Junior League of Augusta At tic Sale Call 706-736-0033.

(02/20#7960)

THE COLISEUM

Hot High Energy Dance Music And Laser Light Show

The Friendliest Alternative Bar in the CSRA

HOT MALE STRIPPERS Drink Specials: BEAU & THE BOYS Wed - $7 Wet N' Wild Friday, 2/14 13TH ANNUAL MISS VALENTINE’S DAY PAGEANT

CALL NOW CLASSES START MARCH 3RD Ask how you can SAVE between $250 and $500 on Tuition.

Fri & Sat - $9 All You Can Drink Draft Sat - $2 Bud/Bud Light

Hot Dog Buffet $2.99

Open Mon-Fri 7pm-3am Sat 7pm-2:30am

Fri & Sat. No Cover Before 10 p.m.

1632 Walton Way • Augusta, GA

706-733-2603

AUGUSTA SCHOOL OF MASSAGE

www.ColiseumAugusta.com

FREE COVER

3512 1/2 Wheeler Road, Augusta located near Target & The Family Y

733-2040

Club Argos

& the Tower of Argos

Saturday, 1/25

Train for a rewarding career in massage therapy in only 6 months!

MARLBORO STATION

Friday - Bring your talent - singing, dancing, dragging, magic, etc. plus $10 all you can drink Saturday - Shirley Q. Liquor Showtime is 11pm. Get tickets while they last by calling (706) 481-8829 after 9pm or stop by.

Doors open Saturday at 8pm UPCOMING EVENTS Saturday, February 15th - Club Argos Miss Sweetheart Pageant Entry fee: $35 Categories: Ladies in Red & Talent Friday, February 21st - The Gospel Echoes from Berkharts, Atlanta perform to benefit the Church of Our Redeemer

Argos welcomes Gay, TVTS, BDSM, Bi, Swingers & all others.

481-8829 Argos opens daily @ 9:00pm Email: Club Argos@Aol.com 1923 Walton Way across from Ming Wah Parking and Entrance in back on Heckle

141 Marlboro St. NE, Aiken, SC • 803-644-6485

www.marlboro.4mg.net

POSITIVE IMAGE AWARENESS CENTER

DARLEN-DE OFFERS: CHANNELED TAROT • • • •

Psychic Counseling • Hypnosis & Counseling Master Teacher Channeling & Classes Circle of Peace Group Meditations Spiritual Warrior Meetings & Workshops

706-210-4849 READINGS BY

MRS. GRAHAM

SPECIALS

$39 Massage Special

1 Hr. Session By appt.

Gift Certificates Available

Advanced Chiropractic 1944 Walton Way, Suite H Augusta

706-772-4989 TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITATION *Reduces Stress *Improve Health *600 Research studies verify the benefits 706-860-6483 (2/06#7974)

L❤ve & Light HEALING CENTER HYPNOSIS WORKS! Stop Smoking Stop Smoking LoseWeight Weight Lose

l

Do you want clarification in your life or help with decisions?

Try Angel Harp Readings

Sessions with the angels

Betty L ❤ve, CHT. Reiki Master

733-4187 ❤ 733-8550 Full Body Massage!

Therapeutic tension relief, intense or tender touch, rela xing music, aromatherapy, by appointment only - $49.00/hr.

Call Joy - 706-771-9470 or John - 803-474-1314 (01/23#7943)

C A R D R E A D I N G S

Mrs. Graham, Psychic Reader, Advises on all affairs of life, such as love, marriage, and business. She tells your past, present and future. Mrs. Graham does palm, tarot card, and crystal readings. She specializes in relationships and reuniting loved ones.

Sun 1/26 - Super Bowl Party Free Food, No Cover Fri 1/31 - Southern Comfort Male Revue Sat 2/1 - CSRA Groove Night 5 DJ’s, Non Stop, DJ Casey

Travel

Coupon good for non-members 21+up w/ ID First time entry

259 Bobby Jones Exp. (Ste. 3) Martinez, GA 30907 (Across from Wal-Mart) TheAwarenessCtr@aol.com www.spiritualwarriors.net

2477 Wrightsboro Rd.

Place your Classified ad today!

Call 738-1142

Alt. Lifestyles

Are you ready to begin a new career?

YOU CAN BE!

Religion Metropolitan Community Church of Our Redeemer A Christian Church reaching to all: including Gay, Lesbian, and Transgendered Christians.

Meeting at 311 Seventh Street, 11 am and 7 pm each Sunday. 722-6454 MCCAugusta@aol.com www.mccoor.com

Call 738-1142 to place your Classified ad today!

Mind, Body & Spirit

SPECIAL READINGS WITH WITH CARD

M E T R O

Augusta School of Massage, Inc.

50

341 S. Belair Rd. Open from 9 a.m. til 9 p.m.

Call (706) 733-5851

INTEGRAL YOGA Classes/Private Classes Bhakti Brown, RYT

(706) 556-8490 • 556-2112 or (803) 279-8262

Services RENT A GIRLFRIEND Maid Service, Home Management For Single Professionals.

Cleaning, Cooking, Errands, Petsit ting, Organizing.

Will Negotiate Schedule, Call 706-399-4583 (3/13#7968)

www.metspirit.com

Talk Line ***HOT VEGAS GIRLS*** LIVE 1-ON-1 XXX FREE to BROWSE 1-702-216-3500 LOW AS .66¢/MIN. 1-900-420-0420 Ex t. 165 $2.95/min. 18+ (01/23#7902)

Miscellaneous For Sale Mahogany End Tables, nice condition been in family for years $70 each. 706-444-8619 (03/27#7973) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Golf Clubs-Taylor Made irons super steel. Rifle shafts reg. flex 3-PW $199, 706-650-7487 (03/27#7972) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– EMACHINES 333cs Computer, keyboard, mouse, speakers, stand. $250 OBO! Call 7962769 after 5pm. (03/27#7971) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Nordic Track, Excellent condition. Comes with video tape and info. $65.00 Small exercise cycle use sit ting in chair, $25.00. 855-5521 (03/27#7970) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Outdoor Furniture, Chase, 3 cushion set te, and chair, sell for $50.00. Cocktail Table, four pedistal base in gold with heavy glass top sell for $75.00, Call 803-649-6658 (03/20#7963) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Computer Workcenter By Sauder with doors.

Holds monitor, CPU., printer, etc. New $499.00 sell for $100.00, Call 803-649-6658 (03/20#7962) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Luxman Phono Preamp was $600 sell $90.

AudioSource SS Five surround sound processor was $200 sell $50.00. Call 706-210-4884.

(03/20#7961) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Computer - 166MHZ Pentium-Monitor, Keyboard, Mouse, 56k Modem. Good Condition and internet ready. $250.00, Call Nancy at 803641-0446 (03/13#7951) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Golf Clubs: Biggest Big Ber tha, regular graphite, 10°, $150.00; Adams GT-363 Titanium, regular graphite, 10°, $100.00; Steelhead Plus 7-wood, graphite $90.00; Call Les 860-3387 (03/13#7951) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Mounted Deer Head and shoulder 8 point,Very Good Condition $145.00/Door 15 panel solid oak ex terior $95.00 706-541-0656 (03/13#7950)

Book: Black West Documentary, Pictorial History, 9 & 10 Calvary Buffalo Soldier & more $300, OBO Call, C. Allen 706-560-9782 (03/06#7946) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Commercial Freezer, 1 year old , double door, all stainless steel. $800.00 OBO Barstools 803594-9594 (03/06#7942) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Sears Lawn Tractor L.T. 1000 - 21 Horsepower 46”-cut Used 4 Months - Like New - Original New Price $1,400.00 - Now Only $900.00 OBO. 706-836-3082 (02/27#7941) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Midwest Ferret Cage, 4 ft. tall. 3 Levels. Great Condition. $125.00. 2 Water bot tles are free with cage. Retails for $189.99. Call 706-8540231 (02/20#7932) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Queen Anne Style Dining Room Group, Cherry finish, table, 6 chairs, and china cabinet. $250.00, Call 706-836-3120 (02/13#7927) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Kenwood Stereo, 3 disc CD changer, equalizer, dual casset te player, surround sound speakers and rack. $200.00. Call 706-793-0077 (02/13#7927) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Small Truck Toolbox. Metal with tonneau cover for bed. $50.00, 803-278-2669 (02/06#7919) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– 6 New Patio Chairs, Outside - Mar tha Stewar t - Paid $360.00 - Sell $180.00, Call 279-0447 (02/06#7917) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Kindercraft Crib, White enamel wide slats excellent condition. Linen drawer pulls out from underneath w/ mat tress $200.00 Call Kim, 706-733-0031, Leave message. (01/30#7913) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Golf Clubs. Several golf clubs: custom set of irons ($95.00), Mizuno driver ($35.00), 2 fairway woods ($20.00) 706-495-9900 (01/30#7911) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Mountain Bike, Gary Fisher Big Sur, 18” frame, Indy C, New velociraptors, completely rebuilt $400. 706-534-9639 (01/23#7903)

51 M E T R O S P I R I T

To become a member, call 1-888-223-7044 To listen and respond to ads, call 1-900-226-8908 Calls cost $1.99 per min., Must be 18+.

,call 1-866-832-4685

To respond to ads using a ABSOLUTE ALTRUISM SBF, 42, 5’7”, 125lbs, seeks emotionally secure gentleman, 35+, with honor, wit, and wisdom. ☎605946 STRONG WILL SBF, 45, outgoing, attractive, youthful, enjoys writing, music, traveling. Seeking mature, strong-willed SBM, 35-48, for friendship. ☎965893 ALL I THINK ABOUT IS YOU SBF, 28, enjoys cooking, reading, traveling, spending time with my kids/family. Looking for a male, 25-40, who likes similar things, friendship first. ☎672206 POSITION AVAILABLE! Mother of two lovely daughters, 34, employed with the Board of Education, seeks SW/HM, 33-48, to begin with friendship and possibly evolve into an LTR. ☎651992 KIND-HEARTED, REAL Petite, green-eyed SWC mother, 39, Scorpio, N/S, seeks WM, 33-45, N/S, to build a love that lasts a lifetime. ☎648419 I’LL COOK Fun-loving, intelligent SBF, 22, Capricorn, N/S, student, mother of three, seeks man, 21-30, to accompany me in life. Kids a plus. ☎647824 IN SEARCH OF MY SOULMATE He must be a tall (5’10”-6’4”), Christian man, 42-55, N/S, who is honest, faithful, devoted and lively. I am a SBPF, 5’6”, 150lbs, and looking for LTR. ☎641005 TAKE IT SLOW SWF, 49, 5’6”, reddish/blonde hair, outgoing personality, wants to build a serious relationship with a SWM. ☎642309 GOOD-HEARTED DWF, 61, 5’9”, honest, neat in appearance, with a good sense of humor. Seeking WM, 60-70, who’s honest and caring. ☎574264 LONELY WOMAN SBF, 32, single mom, seeks SWPM, quality military man who has old-fashioned values, financially secure, for LTR. ☎591885 OPEN-MINDED Fun-loving, humorous SF, 18, 5’4”, blond/blue, likes shopping, clubbing, sports.

Seeking SM for friendship and casual dating. ☎589903 SENSE OF HUMOR REQUIRED SF, 33, 5’, full-figured, cocoa complexion, looking for friendship leading to relationship with SM, 25-40, who doesn’t play games. ☎579505 MAKE MY HEART LAUGH SBF, 22, 5’8”, 155lbs, part-time student, seeks sensual, kind man with a great heart, for movies, dining out, and open-minded conversation. ☎565120

We Purchase Fine Swiss Watches, Estate Jewelry and Diamonds.

Monday-Saturday 10am-9pm 2635 Washington Road | Augusta, Georgia 30904 | 706.738.7777 www.windsorjewelers.net LONELY HEART Hard-working DWF, 41, 5’5”, 234lbs, brown/blue, enjoys conversation, music, poetry, cuddling. Seeking DWM, 38-42, who still dreams of that one true love. ☎563879 SEEKS GENTLEMAN SWF, 29, 5’11”, 145lbs, enjoys outdoors, dining, movies, bowling and quiet evenings at home. Seeking honest SM, 29-39, for LTR. ☎550425 WAITING TO HAPPEN DWF, 45, 5’4”, brown/green, likes sports, music, dining out. Seeking serious, honest, hardworking SWM, 40-55. ☎965902 AN AUTUMN SPECIAL Hard-working WF, 38, 5’4”, 100lbs, blonde/ brown, enjoys biking, watersports, cooking, and travel. Seeking WM, 35-50, for possible LTR. ☎965904

OLD-FASHIONED GUY SHM, 34, 5’4”, 170lbs, Virgo, N/S, writes and loves country western music, helping the homeless, church. Seeking SHF, 32-36, N/S, with similar interests. ☎835306 ARE YOU LONESOME? SM, 37, 6’5’’, 350lbs, would like to meet a nice female, 18-40, to get to know first. Let’s see where this leads! ☎780940

SINGLE TOO LONG SWM, 35, 5’10”, curly/hazel, in good shape, loves kids, cooking, movies, animals.

Seeking WF, 25-42, fun and witty. ☎945669 MY DEMANDS ARE SIMPLE SBM, 34, seeks a relationship with a faithful and honest BF, 28-39, smoker, for an honest relationship. ☎949160 IT TAKES TWO SBM, 33, Gemini, N/S, enjoys art, jazz, classical music, hip hop. Seeking SBF, 2343, for shared interests in music, life, and happiness. ☎941377 IF YOU’RE READING THIS... why not give me a call? SWCM, 19, 6’, 185lbs, brown/blue, relaxed attitude, Capricorn, N/S, seeks WF, 19-25, N/S, for possible LTR. ☎938173 LOOK ME UP Well-educated, professional SWM, 45, no children, never married, enjoys boating, fishing, camping and exploring life. Seeking SF, with similar interests, for fun and friendship. ☎898023 LET’S MAKE A CONNECTION Laid-back, easygoing, employed SBM, 48, seeks similar SB/WF, 30-60, into music, dining out, spending quality time together.

There’s no need to be lonely! ☎919786 A REAL MAN Handsome SBM, 39, compassionate, financially secure, seeks romantic, attractive, compassionate BF, 21-45, for romantic dinners, movies, walks along the beach, true friendship, LTR. ☎920361 WAITING ON YOU Clean-cut DWM, 44, 5’4”, brown/hazel, great personality, enjoys dining out, trips to the lake, camping, sports (football, baseball). Searching for young lady, no games, interested in LTR founded on friendship. ☎910547

Stud Finder YOU HAVE 6 NEW MATCHES

THE LONG RUN SBF, 43, single parent, health service technician, Capricorn, N/S, loves basketball.

Seeking BM, 37-47, N/S, for friendship, love, and beyond. ☎872160 HONESTY IS KEY DWF, 38, mother of two/homemaker, loves Bon Jovi, dining out, quiet time at home.

Seeking honest, sincere SWM, 38-45.

Could it be you? ☎910404 TRUE: One is a lonely number. DWF, no children, self-supporting, my physical appearance won’t embarrass you, retired and seeking a loving, truthful, reliable man, 50-75. ☎896701 SWEET AND SINGLE SBF, 30, Scorpio, N/S, student, enjoys quality time, movies, dining out, quiet times.

Seeking friendship with SBM, 29-43, for possible LTR. ☎890152 TIRED OF BEING ALONE SWF, 49, 5’9”, 164lbs, Cancer, N/S, social drinker, mother of one, enjoys music, dining out, reading. Seeking SWM, 44-59, N/S, for LTR. ☎890570 SERIOUS ABOUT LIFE SBCF, 50, 165lbs, Scorpio, N/S, churchgoer, mother of one, seeks outgoing, christian SBM, 50-60, N/S, with good heart, who is serious, for LTR. ☎885036 BEACH BUM SBF, 31, with bachelor’s degree in communications, Taurus, N/S, loves dining out, movies, working out, and reading. Seeking man, 26-36. ☎869451 OLD-FASHIONED VALUES Honest, relaxed, christian SBF, 56, Aries, N/S, enjoys cooking, dining out, quiet times at home. Seeking marriage-minded, financially secure SBM, 50-56, N/S, for LTR. ☎829149 COMPATIBLE? Funny, smart SBF, 19, fun-loving, friendly, enjoys movies, clubbing, hand holding, dancing. Seeking SM, with like interests and qualities for friendship and possible LTR. ☎701088 ARE YOU THE ONE? College educated SWF, early 40s, 5’6”, 136lbs, extroverted, enjoys camping, country living, animals, movies, traveling.

Seeking same in SWM, 40-50, similar interests. ☎965910 TABLE FOR TWO SWF, 57, 5’4”, blond/green, easygoing, outgoing, enjoys cooking, fishing, reading, NASCAR. Seeking honest, respectful S/DWM, 57-65. ☎965851 BE MY FRIEND Attractive SWF, 29, 5’7”, 129lbs, brown/ brown, N/S, no kids, never married, seeks SWM, 20-37, in shape, friendship first, possible LTR. ☎945103 GOOD GIRL Attractive SWF, 38, 5’4”, 145lbs, blonde/ hazel, N/S, Pisces, enjoys outdoors.

Seeking tall SWM, 30-42. ☎864247 ARE YOU SINCERE? SF, 28, blond/blue, enjoys the gym, time with family and friends. Looking for an honest guy, 26-35, who is not into games. ☎857530 A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN... inside and out. SBF, 26, 5’10’’, light complexion, enjoys movies, music, just having a good time. Seeking honest, sincere man for LTR. ☎861401

SINCERE BEAUTY Sophisticated SBCF, 23, 5’2”, 140lbs, interested in seeking educated, independent, employed SBM, 23-30, long walks, stimulating conversation, friendship, dating, more. ☎849311 GENUINE GEMINI Sweet SWF, 21, 6’, in medical field, enjoys Nascar, long walks. Seeking tall SWM, 2535, with similar interests. Friendship first, possible LTR. ☎848654 I LIKE LIFE Single mom, 32, looking for a man with a vibrant personality and a love for living. ☎844138 I’LL WRITE YOU A POEM! SF, 25, 5’4’’, 150lbs, Virgo, enjoys reading, cooking, music, movies. Seeking a man who likes to try new things. ☎841437 WILLING TO MAKE TIME Busy, hard-working SBF, 31, nurse, mother of one, Taurus, N/S, enjoys traveling, walks, shopping. Seeking SBM, 31-39, N/S, for LTR. ☎836074 TAKE A CHANCE Laid-back SF, 30, enjoys dining in/out, going to the movies, church activities.

Seeking SM, secure in himself to share those things. ☎767576 BRAINS & BEAUTY Spirited executive SBF, 41, 5’8”, 138lbs, Gemini, enjoys dancing, dining, intellectual conversation, laughter, picnics, adventures.

Seeking humorous, classy gentleman, 3545, with kindred spirit. ☎751454 SKATE, RIDE, BOWL, ETC. African-American mom, 23, 5’, 159lbs, mother of two, currently in school, looking for honest, trustful family-man, 20s-30s, who’ll give his 100%. ☎751642 I’M YOUR VENUS SWF, 44 (looks younger), 5’, blonde/blue, with a full-figure, seeks HM, 5’5”-6’, who is secure. ☎747133 WORK OF ART Voluptuous SBF, 28, loves fishing, swimming, cooking. Looking for a man with the same passions. ☎747775 IMPORT FROM EUROPE This foreign born SWF, 40, Aries, N/S, seeks a fine BM, 35-50, smoker, for friendship and dating. ☎744559 ATTENTION... your miracle date is in Augusta. SF seeks military male, 28-50, with good qualities and values. Children ok, race open. ☎732101 COMPANIONSHIP DWF, 48, enjoys antiquing, travel, dining out, movies and more. Seeking DWM, 4858, for loving, tender relationship. ☎732056 AQUARIUS HERE SWF, 18, brown/brown, loves, reading, travel, movies, outdoors. Seeking mature companion with an easygoing attitude, for friendship, possibly more. ☎732141 GOD LOVER Athletic, shy SBF, 33, 5’5”, 160lbs, Gemini, smoker, enjoys church, dining out, cooking, traveling, shopping, reading. Seeking outgoing man, 35-50, smoker, for LTR. ☎709843 NEED A SPARK... try me. Attractive, petite SWF, 57, fun, friendly and affectionate, raising grand children, seeks SWM, mid 50s-60s, trustworthy with open heart, for dining, movies, music.

Friendship first. ☎702738 NO GAMES PLEASE DWF, 33, 5’10”, full-figured, brown/hazel, self-employed mother of three, seeks WM, 25-45, honest, faithful, devoted, for fun, friendship, LTR. ☎680330 TWO PIECES OF A PUZZLE Full-figured, very attractive, independent woman, 31, 5’2”, seeks someone special to spend time with. You: honest, fun-loving, varied interests. ☎685405

J A N

Mobile Dating. The easiest way to meet great people.

GUIDELINES: DATE MAKER ads are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses. First meetings should occur in a public place. Abbreviations are permitted only to indicate gender preference, race, and religion. We suggest your ad contain a self-description, age range, lifestyle and avocations. Ads and voice messages containing explicit sexual language will not be accepted. This publication reserves the right to revise copy containing objectionable phrases; to reject in its sole discretion, any advertisement on account of its text. This publication assumes no responsibility for the content or reply to any DATE MAKER ad. The advertiser assumes complete liability for the content and all replies to any advertisement or recorded message and for any claims made against this publication and its agents as a result thereof. The advertiser agrees to indemnify and hold this publication, its employees and its agents harmless from all costs, expenses (including reasonable attorney fees), liabilities and damages resulting from or caused by the publication or recording placed by the advertiser or any reply to any such advertisement. By using DATE MAKER, the advertiser agrees not to leave his/her phone number, last name or address in his/her voice greeting. Not all boxes contain a voice greeting.

ABBREVIATIONS

To purchase more than your free 30 words, at $2.00 per word, please call 1-800-234-5120

M B D F H C LTR

Male Black Divorced Female Hispanic Christian Long-term Relationship

G W A S J P N/D N/S

Gay White Asian Single Jewish Professional Non-Drinker Non-smoker

Become a member of Augusta’s hottest new way to meet singles! Call today!

2 3 2 0 0 3

52

To become a member, call 1-888-223-7044 To listen and respond to ads, call 1-900-226-8908

M E T R O

J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

,call 1-866-832-4685

To respond to ads using a MATURE WOMAN WANTED Hardworking DM, 48, brown/green, looking for S/DF, who’s independent, spontaneous, open-minded and mature, D/D-free, who knows what she wants in life, for friendship and maybe romance. ☎898762 LET’S HOOK UP 34-year-old SBM, 5’9”, 180lbs, Aquarius, nurse, bald head, new to area, open-minded, fun-loving, hopeless romantic. Seeking woman who loves to be romanced. ☎849401 MY DREAM LADY... is a spontaneous woman with a serious mind and who knows what she wants in life.

SBM, 42, believes dreams can come true. ☎907741 FUN FOR ALL SWM, 50, seeks intelligent, aware SF, in shape, for indoor and outdoor fun. Looking for a friendship, that may lead to more. ☎902103 PHONE CALL AWAY Self-employed SWM, 40, Pisces, N/S, N/D, enjoys dining out, movies, cooking in, many activities. Seeking similar SWF, 28-45, N/S, to share good times with. ☎882776 IN NEED OF LOVE, SERIOUS SWM, 44, 6’, never married, blond/blue, Aries, smoker, seeks honest, romantic SWF, 25-38, enjoys sports, country walks, and more, for LTR, marriage. ☎889184 LET’S GET IN TOUCH! SWM, 20, Cancer, smoker, enjoys fishing, hunting, walking, playing games. Seeking older woman, 30-60, for possible relationship. ☎888111 SEEKING CHRISTIAN WOMAN Friendly, committed, independent SBCM, 42, 5’11”, enjoys quiet evenings. Seeking attractive, committed, independent SBCF for friendship, possible LTR. ☎796760 ARE YOU 26-48?

WM, brown/blue, likes fishing, camping, scuba diving, travel, and woodworking. If you would like to jon me, call! ☎715263 WILL SEND PHOTO Peace-loving, dark blonde, 5’11”, 200lbs, friends say handsome, I say ok. Seeking Asian, mulatto, or dark haired american lady, 25-35, no kids, for travel, dining out, plays, and music events. ☎882215 THE PERFECT MATE DBM, 40, 6’, 195lbs, with 1 child, Capricorn, smoker, homeowner, loves gardening, cooking, and hunting. Seeking WF, 28-42, petite, to bedazzling. ☎873556 NOT JUST ANOTHER... stud. DBM, 33, with 3 children, Libra, N/S, seeks a lucky lady, 25-45, N/S, with whom to share quality time. ☎868350 KNOCK-KNOCK, WHO’S THERE? Call me and find out. SWM, 34, Cancer, N/S, loves to tell jokes. Seeking WF, 25-39, N/S, for friendship and relationships. ☎775609 GET IN TOUCH WITH ME SM, 21, 6’3’’, athletic build, student, loves movies, clubs, church. Seeking compassionate, down-to-earth, fun woman. ☎861556 DON’T MISS THIS! SBM, 45, 5’10’’, 230lbs, interested in sports, jazz, movies, dining out. Would like to meet a woman with the same interests. ☎862898 SHOW ME YOUR SMILE SM, 44, enjoys kayaking, cooking, art, biking, exercise, outdoors. Looking for a female, 34-50, who has the same kinds of interests. ☎858979 POET SEEKS MUSE SBM, 45, loves all sports, board games, fishing, travel. Seeking a woman to share movies, dining and romance with. ☎843396 DARE TO DREAM Outgoing SBM, 21, 5’9”, 165lbs, Capricorn, N/S, loves going out, outdoors, children.

Seeking SWF, 20-26, N/S, for possible family. ☎835444

EARLY XMAS GIFT Very romantic SBM, 31, 6’1”, 255lbs, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys church, dining out, cooking. Seeking stable SBF, 25-35, for friendship first, leading to something longterm. ☎837718 LET’S TALK SM, 28, 6’5”, 320lbs, enjoys sports, reading, movies, dining out, travel. Seeking attractive, intelligent, sensual SF, with similar interests, for dating and more. ☎796390 LET YOUR HAIR DOWN SHM, 26, Leo, N/S, lives a regular, cleancut lifestyle. Seeking a petite, active woman, 18-30, sophisticated southern belle, with back woods babe heart. ☎790345 YOU WIN MY HEART SWM, 44, N/S, seeks clean, sincere, honest, intelligent, wise, crafty SBF, 35-45, N/S, for life mate and deep friendship. ☎704669 I’M HERE FOR YOU SM, 42, teacher, seeks honest SF, 21-42, for friendship, possibly more. I like music, movies, conversation. How about you? ☎779153 CALL ME SM, 51, fun-loving, enjoys sporting events, movies, dancing more. Seeking fun woman with similar interests. ☎761290 SEEKS MATURE Spontaneous, sincere SM, 20, seeks older, loving lady, to explore life with, possible LTR. ☎767728 LET’S BE FRIENDS Outgoing, active SM, 31, enjoys sports, traveling, movies, dining out, and fun.

Seeking SF,with same interests. ☎769857 HEY LADIES! Outgoing happy SM, 24, 5’6”, 150lbs, slender and fit, brown complexion, braided hair, seeks SF, who’s open-minded and down for whatever. ☎767971 FIT FOR A QUEEN Restaurant manager SWM, 40, 6’, black/green, moustache, enjoys outdoors, hunting, fishing, camping, movies. Seeking big beautiful woman, 25-50. Tell me about you. ☎754399 GREAT CATCH SWM, 53, enjoys church, music, dining out, travel and more. Seeking kind, understanding SCF, with similar interests. ☎732175 CHANGE R LIVES 4 THE BEST Outdoorsy SWM, 57, enjoys fishing, quiet conversation seeks the right woman to be at my side. Let’s accomplish much in life!

Looking for a SW/HF, 45-60. ☎718103

YOU CAN MAKE MY DAY Male, 60, Cancer, N/S, seeks a WM, 49-65, N/S, for casual relationship. Why not call me? ☎927707 DOESN’T PLAY GAMES Unattached GBM, 41, interested in meeting open-minded, fun-loving, honest, truthful, compassionate and loyal GM for LTR. ☎920995 DARK CHOCOLATE SBM, 23, with a dark complexion, wants to go out and have good times with a great guy. ☎917508 CALL ME... you will not be disappointed. SM, 35, Indian, 5’9”, seeks the same. Let’s get together. ☎916175 YOU NEVER KNOW Fun-loving, easygoing GWM, 51, 5’11”, 198lbs, enjoys cooking, movies, fishing, walking. Seeking interesting GWM, 18-33, who’s full of life, for casual relationship, possibly more. ☎676662 COOL WORLD SBM, 22, loves bowling, football, chess. In search of a man who loves the same things. ☎907631

How do you

LET’S JUST CUDDLE Lonely GWM, 33, Aries, smoker, enjoys quiet nights, relaxing, being with somebody.

Seeking GWM, 20-30, for possible LTR. ☎887748 BE YOURSELF Honest, caring SM, 47, 5’10”, 220lbs, seeks outgoing, ambitious, down-to-earth man, to share friendship, fun times and maybe more. ☎895468 I’D LOVE TO MEET! SM, 47, likes dining out, having fun, malls, movies, television. Looking for sincere male for possible relationship. ☎861252 YOU WON’T BE SORRY Real, honest, and sweet GBM, 18, 5’11”, dark-skinned, Gemini, N/S, seeks friendly GBM, 18-35, not into games. I’m ready for a commitment. ☎831448 NEW TO THIS BiWM, 49, 5’10”, thick, black/blue, Libra, N/S, seeks friendly, fun-loving GWM, 35-65, N/S, for possible LTR. ☎839145 IT’S YOUR CALL GWM, young 46, 5’11”, 200lbs, brown/ brown, masculine, outgoing, enjoys travel, dining out, movies, shopping, Nascar.

Would like to meet honest, passionate GM, with similar interests, for dating, possible LTR. Serious inquiries only. ☎792384 FREE SPIRIT SBM, 24, loves having fun, enjoys tennis, racquetball, waterskiing. Seeking SM, to share a night out on the town, friendship and maybe a lasting relationship. ☎768054 TAKE THAT CHANCE Brown-skinned GBM, 35, 5’11”, 150lbs, who likes quiet evenings, reading, dining out, movies and stimulating conversations.

Seeking SB/HM, 30-50, for friendship, possibly more. ☎753854 SHOW ME THE TOWN... and what there is to do around here. Me: SWM, 42, N/S, new to the area. You: SWM, under 51, anxious to show me how wonderful Augusta is. ☎719366 LOOKING FOR LOVE GWM, 41, 5’8’, 140lbs, Pisces, enjoys fishing, television, wood working, gardening, arts, crafts. Seeking GWM, 25-45, for friendship first, possible LTR. ☎705204 I KNOW WHERE IT’S AT SBM, 25, practical yet fun, outgoing, Aquarius, smoker, seeks a masculine, alluring, well-rounded BM, 23-45, smoker, with his priorities in order. ☎695448

OUT SPOKEN SWM, 32, 5’11”, 145lbs, enjoys camping, fishing, Nascar. Seeking laid-back WM, 2335, for LTR. ☎560095 BEYOND SWM, 32, 5’11”, 155lbs, light hair, looking for good time with GM, 18-45, ☎966003

MAN FOR ALL SEASONS GBF, 31, 5’6”, brown/brown, Cancer, smoker, enjoys kids, bowling. Seeking openminded, passionate, understanding GBF, 23-45, for LTR. ☎941850 NO INTRO NEEDED SWF, 39, 5’7”, 145lbs, homeowner, easygoing, selfless, Taurus, smoker, loves movies and bowling. Seeking WF, 35-49, with comparable interests. ☎935299 I WON’T LET YOU DOWN Single GBF, 32, mother, non-smoker, looking to become acquainted with a laid-back, sensual GBF, who enjoys quiet times, movies. Interested? ☎910581 CHURCH-GOER SBF, 38, Virgo, N/S, heavy-duty equipment operator, seeks BF, 30-45. Enjoys motorcycle riding, playing bass guitar. ☎799776 FRIENDSHIP SBF, 38, 5’7”, slim, fit, seeks SF, for friendship and fun. Must be outgoing, love to wine and dine, travel, movies and theater. ☎878217 CHOCOLATE SEEKS CREAM SF, 39, new to the area, down-to-earth, loves laughing, sight-seeing. Seeking WF, 30-45, to show me a great time! ☎861222 SOMEONE TO LOVE GBF, 21, with brown complexion, seeks femme GBF, 21-30, with no baggage, and her priorities straight. ☎843696 VERY PRETTY SBF...

28, two children, confident, feminine, seeks female, 20-35, with the same qualities, who is not into head games. ☎785531 A GOOD HEART SF, 39, goes to church, works for a living, likes having fun, going on trips. Seeking a similar female, 37-49. ☎780112

SPECIAL FRIENDSHIP Attractive, feminine SWF, 41, 5’4”, seeks a very open-minded WF, 35-48, for fun and exciting times. ☎775074 RAINBOW SEEKER Seeking my butch. SWF, 41, 5’2”, enjoys movies, walks, reading, quality snuggle time. Honesty is a must. Seeking SWF, with no drama, 30+. ☎754885 JOIN ME GBF, 32, nurse, part-time student, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys bowling, movies, shopping, traveling. Seeking casual relationship with woman, 25-45. ☎711628 BACK IN THE SADDLE AGAIN SBF, 58, mature, attractive, young-at-heart, Sagittarius, N/S, seeks woman, 48-62, N/S, who is ready to live again and likes traveling, playing cards, and bowling. ☎691703 TO THINE OWN SELF... be true. SBF, 27, 5’5”, 165lbs, Sagittarius, N/S, has 2 kids, enjoys walks, movies, and quiet times. Seeking an honest woman, 2735, N/S, for friendship first and foremost. ☎693934 GET TO KNOW THE REAL ME Dark-skinned young woman, 23, 4’9”, attractive, fun-loving, nice, caring, honest, laid-back. Seeking GF, 23-29, for casual relationship. ☎635372 I’M LOOKING 4 U Easygoing, loyal SBF, 31, 5’3”, 155lbs, security officer, people person, fun-loving, nice, caring, honest, enjoys bowling, movies, cuddling at home. Seeking trustworthy, outgoing SBF, 26-35, for friendship, maybe LTR. ☎965835 FRIENDSHIP FIRST! Funny, smart, down-to-earth GBF, 5’6”, 125lbs, loves long walks, hand holding.

Seeking GF, 21-30, who likes kids and doesn’t play games. ☎965829 ZEST FOR LIFE Articulate, adventurous WF, 32, 5’8”, brown/brown, enjoys animals, running, movies and dining. Looking for WF, 25-40, for friendship. ☎965827 GIVE ME A RING Cute SBF, 30-something, seeks attractive SF, 25-45, for friendship, maybe more. No games. ☎965825 WASTE NO TIME GBF, 36, enjoys dining out, cooking, dining out. Seeking attractive, open-minded, fun, nice GF, 25-45, for friendship and possibly more. ☎965823

We’ll introduce you to enough great people of y da y er ev r fo te da a ve ha d ul co u yo at th the year.

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■ Automotive Spirit

53 M E T R O S P I R I T

Free Automotive Ads

J A N 2 3

BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE METROPOLITAN SPIRIT AND GERALD JONES HONDA

Cars 1968 FORD MUSTANG, metallic blue, hard top, 289 hi performance engine, auto, rebuilt engine, excellent condition, $4700, call Bryan 706627-2331 (903/0227) ————————————— 1981 FORD GRANADA, gray, 4dr, 68K, good car, needs tires, $1000 OBO, 803-6492422 after 3 pm or leave message (889/0220) ————————————— 1982 HONDA ACCORD, silver, 4dr, 5spd, good clutch, new tires, not running, $300 OBO, 706-868-7599 (829/0130) ————————————— 1986 FORD TEMPO, white/blue, one owner, runs well, 5spd, am/fm, cassette, $950 OBO, 706-651-9969 (872/0213) ————————————— 1986 PONTIAC 6000, auto, runs great, 86K, V6, dependable transportation, $1200 OBO, 706-650-1971 day or night (898/0227) ————————————— 1987 HONDA ACCORD, needs body work, drums & rotors turned, has new master cylinder, shoes & wheel cylinders, $650, 706-667-0915 (885/0220) ————————————— 1989 CADILLAC SEVILLE, 4dr, leather, blue, tip top condition, $4000, 706-556-6124 (553/0206) ————————————— 1989 FORD MUSTANG, black, grey interior, auto, mechanically good, 706-738-

4555 or 706-306-5464 (905/0227) ————————————— 1990 PORSCHE 928, black/black, 5spd, leather, 135K, 6CD changer, excellent condition, call Ralph 706-6511114 or 706-951-0013 (870/0213) ————————————— 1991 VOLVO 240, maroon, good condition, AC, PS, PB, PW, am/fm, cassette, cruise, $3000, 912-829-4556 (817/0227) ————————————— 1992 BMW 525, auto, air, CD, low miles, factory warranty, 37 mpg, must sell, $8500, 706863-7071 (832/0206) ————————————— 1992 BMW 525, series sedan, auto, great engine, leather, power sunroof, 155K, only $5790, 706-495-9900 (831/0206) ————————————— 1992 BMW 735il, gray, CD, 14K, lovingly cared for, all extras, $13,000, 706-7365333 (827/0130) ————————————— 1992 CHEVY CAMERO RS, 25th Anniversary Edition, green, gray interior, 305, auto, t-tops, excellent condition, 120K, $6000 firm, 706-3394531 (811/0227) ————————————— 1992 HONDA CIVIC LX, white, 4dr, auto, 115K, local one owner, good condition, $2500, 706-733-3683 (821/0123) ————————————— 1992 INFINITI G20, runs great, 4dr, CD, leather interior, must sell, $1500 OBO, 706823-6607 (815/0227) —————————————

the power of dreams

GERALD JONES

HONDA 2 0 0 3 G O R D O N H I G H W AY • A U G U S TA , G A • 7 0 6 - 7 3 3 - 2 2 1 0 • W W W. G E R A L D J O N E S H O N D A . C O M

1993 FORD T-BIRD, excellent condition, 100K, AC, new tires, adult driven, non-smoker, garage kept, service record, hard to find, $2750 OBO, 706836-3082 (823/0123) ————————————— 1993 FORD TAURUS, very good condition, new tires and brakes, low mileage 66K, loaded, as is, reduced, for quick sale, $3000, 706-7339434 or 706-721-8304 (808/0227) ————————————— 1993 HONDA ACCORD, white, manual, PL & W, AC tape, cruise, $2000 FIRM, 706-854-8665 (833/0206) ————————————— 1994 CADILLAC DEVILLE, hard to find any nicer, 94K, great in and out, $8000, 803648-6731 or 803-645-2352

(828/0130) ————————————— 1995 BMW 325i, white, 5spd, 72K, excellent condition, premium package, priced to sell (KBB: $12-$15,000) asking $11,800, 706-722-0665 (816/0227) ————————————— 1995 VW JETTA GLX, VR6, red, loaded, mint condition, $6500 OBO, 803-819-0132 (826/0123) ————————————— 1996 HONDA ACCORD EX, V6, automatic, all power, leather, alloys, CD, cruise, sunroof, remote, garaged, excellent condition, 81K, $10,500, 706-733-7297 (813/0227) ————————————— 1996 HONDA ACCORD EX, champagne, V6, leather, auto, all power, CD, alloys, garaged,

maintenance records, excellent condition, $9800,OBO, 706733-7297 (902/0227) ————————————— 1996 NISSAN 200SX, green, 5spd, cruise, CD, well taken care of, $3400 OBO, 706-2671295 (814/0227) ————————————— 1996 OLDSMOBILE 88 LSS, 4dr, 62K, new tires, leather interior, like new, $7500, 706855-0468 (820/0123) ————————————— 1996 PONTIAC GRAND Prix GTP, white, rear spoiler, tint windows, 3.4L, V6 high output, 4spd auto w/OD, well cared for, 129K, $6500, Jim 706-721-3365 days or 706547-7878 eve. (822/0123) ————————————— 1996 TOYOTA COROLLA, hunter green, very clean, 4dr,

auto, excellent condition, new tires, $3900, 706-364-6756 (868/0213) ————————————— 1997 ACURA 3.2TL, Premium, loaded, great ride, new tires, remote keyless entry, power locks & windows, AC, climate control system, Bose radio/cassette/CD, remote sunroof, $10,900, 803279-8326 (887/0220) ————————————— 1997 HONDA CIVIC EX, manual, power windows & locks, spoiler, sunroof, CD player and alarm, 64K in great condition, $7500, 706-240-5384/706790-3676 x2736 (896/0227) ————————————— 1997 VW PASSAT GLX, VR6 package, gun metal grey, black

continued on page 54

CHECK US OUT ONLINE WWW.METSPIRIT.COM

2 0 0 3

54 M E T R O

A L L

N E W

S U B A R U

2 0 0 3 B A J A

S P I R I T J A N 2 3 2 0 0 3

S TA R T I N G AT $23,995* - All wheel drive - Open Cargo bed - Switch back system expands cargo bed into passenger area for hauling longer items - 2.5 liter box engine - Fully independent heavy-duty raised suspension * Plus destination charge, tax, title & fees

GERALD JONES 1801 Gordon Highway, Augusta

706.738.2561

To t e k c i T r u o Y eat Finding Gr Flicks.

Check out Cinema Movie Listings to make the best choice for your viewing pleasure!

continued from page 53 leather, auto, sunroof, heated seats, mint condition, 68K, $9500, 706-832-1812 or 706868-7159 (867/0213) ————————————— 1998 ACURA INTEGRA GSR, white, excellent condition, all power, many extras, 66K, warranty $15,500 OBO, 706-2849693 (812/0227) ————————————— 1998 MAZDA 626 LX, champagne, sedan, 4dr, auto, 54K, sunroof, loaded, excellent condition, $9000, 706-774-0404 or after 5pm 706-738-5154 (904/0227) ————————————— 1999 PONTIAC GRAND AM, bright red, auto, loaded, 87K, cold air, electric seats, etc, 6cyl, clean, $2000 under book (899/0227) ————————————— 2000 ACURA INTEGRA, silver, 2dr, 5spd, all power, sunroof, cold air intake, low miles, warranty, excellent condition, must sell! $13,000 OBO, 706297-2691 (886/0220) ————————————— 2000 DODGE NEON, auto, air, stereo/cassette, looks and runs good, 37K, $8500 OBO, 706-736-6159 (897/0227) ————————————— 2000 FORD MUSTANG LX, white/tan, new tires, oil change, 36K, excellent condition, $11,400 OBO, call 706733-1901 (866/0213) ————————————— 2000 FORD TAURUS, white, full power, V6, must sell, (stk#479), $11,850 wow, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (858) ————————————— 2000 HONDA ACCORD SE, 4dr, auto ABS, alloys, PW, PL, CD/cassette, security system, 32K, trunk liner & net, $15,600, 706-733-6807 (835/0206) ————————————— 2000 MAZDA MIATA, green, convertible, extra clean, must have, won’t last, (stk#240-A), $16,515, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (857) ————————————— 2000 NISSAN MAXIMA, full power, must see, very low payments, (stk#409), $17,030, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-2020002 (856) ————————————— 2001 HONDA ACCORD EX VL, burgundy, 4dr, V6, leather, loaded with extras, $20,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706733-2210 (852) ————————————— 2001 HONDA CIVIC EX, CD, auto, extra clean, $13,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706733-2210 (849) ————————————— 2002 HONDA ACCORD SE, auto, power roof, extra clean, 7K, $20,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (846) ————————————— 2001 HONDA ACCORD EX, leather, manual transmission, $19,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (847) ————————————— 2002 HONDA CIVIC LX, silver, coupe, auto, CD, full power, extra clean, (stk#2560-A), special $14,350 very sharp, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (859) —————————————

2002 HONDA CIVIC EX, 2dr, coupe, auto, loaded, 6K, $14,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (893) ————————————— 2002 MITSUBISHI ECLIPSE, silver, coupe, auto, CD, full power, must see, low miles, $14,995, low payments, call now, call quick, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (860)

Motorcycles 1985 HONDA SABRE, VF700, V-4 engine, adult-owned, excellent condition, 14K, $1300, 706-373-9068 (830/0206) ————————————— 2000 HONDA XR650R, enduro off road only, XC, #1 winning bike in desert racing, many power enhancing extras, priced to sell 706-309-9526 after 6 pm (458/0206) ————————————— 2002 HONDA SABRE, 1099cc, custom pearl silver paint job w/fadin candy blue flames. 1920 miles, excellent condition, $7600, matching helmet available, 803-2793410 (818/0227)

Other CESSNA 150 H COMMUTER, 4000 TT, <150 SMOH, for more information call, 803-278-2669 leave message, (869/0213)

SUVs 1992 FORD EXPLORER XLT, 4X4, new tires, new transmission, $4500, 803-279-9278 (873/0213) ————————————— 1997 LANDROVER LSE, loaded, leather, excellent condition, 27K, $16,000, 706667-0599 (901/0227) ————————————— 1997 FORD EXPLORER XLT, 4WD, PW, PS, PL, PM, leather 85K, extended warranty, excellent condition, $9500, 706733-6582 (834/0206) ————————————— 1997 GMC YUKON SLT, white/burgundy leather, excellent condition, $14,000 OBO, 706-833-0624 (819/0227) ————————————— 1998 CHEVY BLAZER, full size, loaded, leather, 45K, excellent condition, $13,000, 706-667-0599 or 706-7290829 (900/0227) ————————————— 1998 ISUZU TROOPER, luxury package, loaded, only $13,500 wow!, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (864) ————————————— 2000 HONDA CRV EX, auto, low miles, $16,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (848) ————————————— 2000 JEEP GRAND Cherokee, gold, loaded, (stk#189), won’t last, only $16,700, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (865) ————————————— 2000 TOYOTA 4RUNNER, loaded, must see, full power, $18,200 must sell, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (862)

————————————— 2001 CHEVROLET TAHOE LS, 4X4, 32K, auto, power package, rugged performance, $24,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (854) ————————————— 2001 HYUNDAI SANTA FE, auto, CD, power package, smooth performer, $14,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706733-2210 (853) ————————————— 2001 ISUZU RODEO, V6, full power, very clean, (stk#7063A) $17,500, call now, call quick! Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (863)

Trucks 1984 GMC SEMI, Cummings 350, 7spd, 12 ton hydraulic tilt trailer, runs great, new rubber, $10,000 firm, 706-339-0189 (894/0220) ————————————— 1996 CHEVY S-10 LS, green, 3dr, V6, auto, CD, 83K, $6500, 803-279-3961 (892/0220) ————————————— 1996 FORD RANGER XLT, white, extended cab, V6, cassette, class III hitch, 117K, great condition, $4500, 803278-0654 (895/0227) ————————————— 1997 FORD RANGER, silver, sport bed, 2.3L, 5spd, AC, stereo, alloy wheels, 75K, showroom condition, $5495 OBO, 706-738-3830 (891/0220) ————————————— 2000 FORD RANGER, 24K, warranty good to 36K, auto, air, disc player, 4cyl, looks new, $9000 OBO, 706-7368032 (884/220)

Vans 1982 FORD VAN, 12 passenger, well maintained, V8, auto, air, $2500, call Bert, 706-7368185 9a to 2p or Jimmy 706738-0911 after 6p (890/0220) ————————————— 1990 CHEVY ASTRO, loaded, power everything, very good condition, V6, auto w/overdrive, cold AC, many extras, 110K, $3450, 706-541-0656 (888/0220) ————————————— 1994 CHEVY ASTRO, 177K, AC replaced 2 yrs ago, excellent condition, $3000, 706738-9662 (871/0213) ————————————— 1997 FORD WINDSTAR GL, dark red, 7 passenger, 3.8 V6, AC, tilt, power windows, 146K, $4200 OBO, 706-860-5001 (774/0220) ————————————— 2000 NISSAN QUEST, one owner, 26K, loaded, excellent condition, $15,100, 706-8633895 (825/0123) ————————————— 2001 HONDA ODYSSEY LX, meticulously maintained, $19,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (850) ————————————— 2001 HONDA ODYSSEY EX, silver, low miles, all the bells & whistles, $24,995, Gerald Jones Honda, 706-733-2210 (851)

55

C H E C K O U T T H E S E G R E AT P R E - O W N E D D E A L S

C A L L

LOW $14,995 MILES!

Silver â&#x20AC;˘ CD â&#x20AC;˘ Full Power â&#x20AC;˘ AT â&#x20AC;˘ Low Payments

D L O S

2001 FORD EXPLORER

$17,350

STK 476

MUST SEE!

V-8 â&#x20AC;˘ White â&#x20AC;˘ Full Power â&#x20AC;˘ Extra Clean â&#x20AC;˘ Low Miles

NISSAN MAXIMA

$17,030

STK 409

MAZDA MIATA

$16,515

MUST SEE!

2000

2000

STK 479

$11,850

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Convertible â&#x20AC;˘ X-Clean â&#x20AC;˘ Green â&#x20AC;˘ Must Have

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FORD TAURUS

STK 240-A

HONDA CIVIC COUPE LX

WOW!

Full Power â&#x20AC;˘ V-6 â&#x20AC;˘ White â&#x20AC;˘ Must Sell

2000

$14,350

STK 2560-A

VERY SHARP!

AT â&#x20AC;˘ CD â&#x20AC;˘ Full Power â&#x20AC;˘ Extra Clean

2002

N O W C A L L Q U I C K

ANDY JONES MAZDA ISUZU

2000 TOYOTA 4-RUNNER

$18,200

MUST SELL!

Loaded â&#x20AC;˘ Must See â&#x20AC;˘ Full Power

2001 ISUZU RODEO

$17,500

STK 7063-A

CALL QUICK!

Full Power â&#x20AC;˘ V-6 â&#x20AC;˘ Very Clean

* Automobiles for sale by an individual may be placed in our FREE Auto Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for six weeks or until the vehicle sells, whichever comes first. After two weeks, if you want to keep running the same ad, you must call The Metropolitan Spirit by 5 p.m. on Friday or we will assume you sold the vehicle and will delete the ad. All vehicles must indicate price. FREE Auto Classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies or dealers.

TO PLACE YOUR AD: Mail: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914-3809 Email: classified@metspirit.com Fax: 706-733-6663 Website: www.metspirit.com Visit Us At: 825 Russell Street, Augusta, GA MUST BE MAILED, FAXED OR EMAILED ON SPECIFIED FORM. ADS ARE NOT TAKEN BY PHONE.

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Name_________________________________________________________________________ Daytime Phone_________________________________________________________________ Address______________________________________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Ad Copy 20 words or less________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

47/ 4/ #(//3% &2/-

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2000 JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE

$16,700

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1998 ISUZU TROOPER

$13,500

7!3().'4/. 2/!$ !5'534! '! Â&#x201E; S

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(803) 202-0002

www.andyjonesmazda.com Open Monday-Friday 9am-8pm, Saturday 9am-7pm At the top of the rise on the Aiken-Augusta Highway in North Augusta

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2002 MITSIBISHI ECLIPSE COUPE

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GUARANTEED CLASSIFIEDS

* Items for sale by an individual may be placed in our Guaranteed Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for ten weeks or until the item sells, whichever comes first. You must call by 5PM on Friday every two weeks to renew the ad or The Metropolitan Spirit will assume the item has been sold and will delete the ad. There is a $5 reinstatement fee if you forget to renew your ad. All items must indicate price. Guaranteed classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies. Guaranteed Classified ads do not include any automotive vehicles, real estate or pets.

RATES: FREE ADS Merchandise Under $250 $8 ADS Merchandise $251 to $500 $15 ADS Merchandise $501 to $1000 $20 ADS Merchandise over $1000 20 Words or Less - No Exceptions.

ADS MUST BE PREPAID DEADLINES: In person - Monday at 3PM By mail, fax or email - Friday at 4PM

TO PLACE YOUR AD: Mail: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914-3809 Email: classified@metspirit.com Fax: 706-733-6663 ADS ARE NOT TAKEN BY PHONE Website: www.metspirit.com Visit Us At: 825 Russell Street, Augusta, GA MUST BE MAILED, FAXED OR EMAILED ON SPECIFIED FORM. PAYMENT OPTIONS: (ADS MUST BE PREPAID) Cash-Money Order-Check

AD PLACEMENT FORM:

Name_______________________________________Daytime Phone_____________________ Address______________________________________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Payment â?&#x2018; Cash â?&#x2018; Check â?&#x2018; Money Order â?&#x2018; Visa â?&#x2018; MC Card No./Exp. Date_____________________________________________________________ Billing Address (if different from above)_____________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Ad Copy 20 words or less________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ GENERAL POLICIES: The Metropolitan Spirit reserves the right to reject, revise, alter, or reclassify any classified advertisement. Please check your ad for errors the first week the ad is published. The Metropolitan Spirit is not responsible for any errors which appear after the first week the ad is inserted.

Saturday Night Fever saturday, february 1, 2003

disco costume party

2003’s inaugural costume party Forget all your problems and return to the days of disco … colorful cloths, fun music, cheap drinks, and a sexually charged dance floor!!!

So put on your best new hairdo and polyester suit, and boogie on over to Modjeska to catch

COVER

$3 w/ costume $10 w/out costume

SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER!

DOORS OPEN @ 8PM $50 CASH & $20 BAR TAB EACH FOR - Best Male Costume - Best Female Costume - Best Overall Dance Moves

DJ Boriqua Spinning Your Favorite Disco Songs Food Provided by Pizza Joint Fashion Show @ Midnight by 8th Street Vintage

MODJESKA

Ultra Lounge & cocktails 813 Broad ~ www.modjeskalounge.com ~ 706.303.9700