Metro Spirit 01.29.2004

METRO SPIRIT Jan. 29-Feb. 4 Vol. 15 No. 26

Augusta’s Independent Voice

MARS TRIPPING

Goodbye Molly pg. 10 CD Reviews pg. 36

2 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

The Comfort Times Local Heating Contractor Announces

I want to give away my $189 Furnace Rejuvenation Service for only $79 to prove a point.

My Point My point is simply this. I believe your furnace is using twice as much gas as it needs to heat your home. I also believe it will break down more often and wear out sooner than it should.

Here's why. Vibration, dirt, voltage fluctuations, temperature swings and even insects take a toll on your air conditioner and heater every year.

You Can Save $500 All that misery for you furnace can end up costing you $100 to $500 per year more than you need to pay.

Thats why I've created an amazing Super Tune-up that renews your complete heating system to almost factory-fresh condition.

$189 Super Tune-Up for only $79 My Rejuvenation Service is far more than the simple clean and checks or basic tune-ups you see advertised.

In fact, my service specialist will perform seven additional critical procedures. More than you would get with virtually any other tune-up.

“WORRY FREE GUARANTEE™”

“I promise your furnace won't break down this winter or my service is FREE!”

John Haynie, Owner

Only 130 Available I now have the resources to accommodate the needs of 130 new clients into my business.

Even though most of my customers come from enthusiastic referrals by my 3,500 current clients, I've decided to give away my $189 service for only $79 to a few home owners who might not be familiar with my company.

You only pay about the same price others charge for a simple clean and tune. And thats why I can only offer a limited quantity. So, I encourage you to call now and schedule your Rejuvenation Service.

One More Thing Since you haven't used my company before, I've decided to take all the risk out of your decision by giving you a

Double Money Back Guarantee

I am so confident that my breaks through Rejuvenation Service will save you substantial money and double the remaining life of your furnace that I'm offering the following bold guarantee: 1. If your furnace break down for any reason this winter, I will cheerfully refund 100% of your money no questions asked.

2. If you do not save at least $79 on your gas bills (the cost of your Rejuvenation Service), I will also refund 100% of your money.

I don't know how to be more fair than that.

So, call now and schedule your Rejuvenation Service. The only way you can lose is to wait and miss your chance to be among the first to call!

722-5304

February at Doctors Hospital

M E T R O

Leave the Parking to Us!

S P I R I T

In support of our ongoing effort to best serve our patients and their families, Doctors Hospital now offers Valet Parking. Available Monday through Friday, 6:30 a.m. to 6 p.m. at the facility’s main entrance, a uniformed attendant is now on-hand to help make your hospital stay or patient visits easier.

Cradle Club

*These classes will be held at:

Doctors Hospital Campus, 3623 J. Dewey Gray Circle Medical Office Building I, Cradle Club Classroom, Suite 110.

Join our Cradle Club today!

Membership is FREE. Please PRE-REGISTER for ALL classes. Call 651-BABY (2229) or register online.

Baby’s Brother & Sister*

your Saturday and hear weekend news, views, and commentary. From

Baby Care*

perspective.

Sunday, February 15, 4 – 6:30 pm

Infant CPR*

Thursday, February 19, 6:30 – 9 pm

Photo of Scott Simon by Lisa Berg

Saturday Express Prepared Childbirth Class* Saturday, February 21, 9 a.m. – 5 pm

Breastfeeding* Call us at (800) 654-3038 or visit us at www.gpb.org for more information about our programming.

Do You Have Acne?

Gastric Bypass Support Group

What Parents & Teachers Should Know About AD/HD

Sunday, February 15, 2 – 3:30 pm

Award-winning host Scott Simon eases you into the weekend with a fresh

Tuesday, February 10, 5:30 – 6:30 pm Location: Doctors Hospital, Office Building III, Classrooms 4 & 5.

An educational seminar offered for the person with diabetes and his/her family members. Please call 651-2468.

Labor & Delivery Tour

Weekend Edition every Saturday at 8:00 AM on WACG, 90.7 FM. Reclaim gardening tips and film reviews to in-depth news analysis, Peabody

Senior Friends

Prepared Childbirth Classes*

Thursday, February 5, 7 – 8:30 pm Tour begins at the hospital in Classrooms 1 & 2.

Life is hectic. Weekends shouldn't have to be. Join Scott Simon for

Community Ed

Diabetes Support Group

Wednesday, February 18, 5:30 – 6:30 pm Location: Doctors Hospital, First Floor, Classrooms 1 & 2.

Come and meet other people who have had gastric bypass surgery and ask questions of the health professionals. For information please call 651-2468.

7 – 9:30 pm Mondays, February 9 – March 8 Tuesdays, February 17 – March 23

Thursday, February 26, 6:30 – 8:30 pm

Orientation Coffee for New and Renewing Members**

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Tuesday, February 10, 10 am Open to all interested in joining Senior Friends. Please RSVP at 651-6716.

AARP Driver Safety Program**

Thursday & Friday, February 12 & 13, 12 pm – 4 pm Participants must pre-register, 651-6716.

Open to the public 50+. $10 per person.

Tuesday, February 17, 2 pm $60 for 6 lessons. For members only.

Education Program – “Heart and Vascular Disease”**

Growing into Womanhood*

Saturday, February 28, 10 am – 12 pm For 13-16 year old girls and their mothers or a female relative. Sexuality, peer pressure, substance abuse and confident decision making skills will be discussed. Please call 651-2450 to register.

Community Health Screenings

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Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday, 8:45 – 9:30 am.

For members only.

Ballroom Dance Class**

Monday, February 23, 7 – 9 pm Location: Doctors Hospital, First Floor, Classrooms 1 & 2.

Join this physician-led program and learn current information on attention deficit disorders in children.

Wednesday, February 25, 7:30 – 10:30 pm Location: Doctors Hospital, First Floor, Classrooms 1 & 2.

• No appointments needed.

• Free Cholesterol, Blood Sugar & Blood Pressure.

• The following tests will be offered for $15 each at every screening: Blood Type; Hemoglobin; A1C; Lipid Profile; PSA; Liver Profile; TSH; CBC Complete Blood Count (Hgb, HCT, WBC, etc.); Chem Basic- Na, K, Cl, CO2, Glucose, Bun, Creat & Calcium.

Friday, February 20, 11:30 am Featuring Dr. Edwards. Free Lunch provided Please call 651-2450 to RSVP. Open to the public.

Line Dance Lessons**

Monday, February 23, 7 pm, Beginners.

Wednesday, February 25, 1 pm, Advanced.

Wednesday, February 25, 2:45 pm, Intermediate. $10 for 6 classes. For members only. Must pre-pay to attend.

Located on the Doctors Hospital Campus, Building III, 1305 Interstate Parkway. **Items will be held in the Senior Friends Meeting Area. To join or register for classes please call 651-6716 or register online www.doctors-hospital.net .

!"#$%&'()%*+%!,--,")%.$".-$%,)%/!$#,0(%1233$#%3#"!%(1&'!(4

We are screening patients 12 years of age and older who require asthma (#$%5"2%")$%"3%&'$!6

Qualified patients will receive at no charge: • Study related physical exams • Skin and laboratory assessments • Investigational medication • Reimbursement for your time and travel To find out more about participating in this acne study call:

Medical Parameters (706) 855-7405 www.medicalparameters.com

J A N

Free Morning Fitness Class**

For more information, call 651-2450 or visit www.doctors-hospital.net • 3651 Wheeler Road • Augusta, GA

We are conducting a research study for participants ages 12 years of age and older who have facial acne.

3

medication or controller therapy.

If you/your child qualify(s) you/your child will receive at no cost: • Investigational Medication • Study-related Office Visits • Study-related Physical Exams

Medical Parameters (706) 855-7405 www.medicalparameters.com

4 M E T R O

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Contents Metro Spirit

M E T R O S P I R I T

JANUARY 29-FEBRUARY 4 • FREE WEEKLY • METROSPIRIT.COM

ON THE COVER

J A N

Mars Tripping By Brian Neill . . . . . . . 13 Cover Design: Erin Lummen

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FEATURES

Goodbye, Molly By Rhonda Jones . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .10 Opinion Whine Line . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .6 Words . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .6 This Modern World . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .6 Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down . . . . . . . . . . . .7 Letters to the Editor . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .8

Bite Time Stands Still at Luigi’s . . . . . . . . . . .18

Events 8 Days a Week . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .22

Tree Trouble?

Arts Art Factory Manufactures Fun . . . . . . . . .27 See Ex-GHIA Executive Director’s Art at GHIA . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .28 Annie Gets Her Gun and Her Man . . . . . .29

Cinema: Review “The Butterfly Effect” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .33

Cinema Movie Listings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .30 Review: “The Perfect Score” . . . . . . . . . .32 Review: “The Butterfly Effect” . . . . . . . . .33 Movie Clock . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .34

Music Mercy Me Finds Mainstream Success . . .20 Combination of Factors Contribute to Pizza Joint’s Success . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .35 “Chipped Front Tooth” Waivers; “Talkie Walkie” Disappoints . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .36 In The Spirit . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .37 Music by Turner . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .38 Music Minis . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .38 Night Life . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .39

Stuff News of the Weird . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .42 Brezsny’s Free Will Astrology . . . . . . . . . .43 New York Times Crossword Puzzle . . . . .43 Amy Alkon: The Advice Goddess . . . . . . .44 Date Maker . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .45 Classifieds . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .47

EDITOR & PUBLISHER David Vantrease ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Rhonda Jones STAFF WRITERS Stacey Eidson, Brian Neill ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Joe White ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE Kriste Lindler PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Smith GRAPHIC ARTISTS Stephanie Bell, Natalie Holle, Erin Lummen ACCOUNTING MANAGER/CLASSIFIEDS Sharon King ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Lisa Jordan ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT INTERN Andy Stokes SENIOR MUSIC CONTRIBUTOR Ed Turner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Amy Alkon, Joey Berlin, Rob Brezsny, Amy Fennell Christian, Rachel Deahl, Chuck Shepherd CARTOONIST Tom Tomorrow

METRO SPIRIT is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks of the year. Editorial coverage includes arts, local issues, news, entertainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum. The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers. Visit us at www.metrospirit.com. Copyright © Metro Spirit, Inc. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited. Phone: (706) 738-1142 Fax: (706) 733-6663 E-mail: spirit@metrospirit.com Letters to the Editor: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, Ga. 30914-3809

Call David at

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6 M E T R O S P I R I T

Whine Line

J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

I

t’s that wonderful time of the year again where all the folks who have by all rights supposedly made the wrong decisions by having a baby way too young, then reinforcing that mistake by doing it again with a different person.

Then, to top it off, they can’t hold a job for whatever reason. They suck the government dry by getting food stamps, Section 8 housing, free health care for all of the family and are they punished? No, they are rewarded greatly by getting an obnoxious income tax return that they did not even remotely earn. So to you good folks reaping the rewards of my single, no kids, hard-working self: I hope you enjoy my money. Glad I could help. What a country.

The Egyptians didn’t take as long to build the pyramids as it has taken to build the archway into Augusta State University.

To the whiner whining about the “Best Whines of 2003” and claiming that the Metro Spirit was oozing with a liberal agenda and that the whiners are a bunch of yellow belly cowards because they bash Bush, Limbaugh and Austin Rhodes. I’m a 30-year Navy veteran. I’m one of the bashers of this illegal president, Austin Rhodes and Rush Limbaugh. I served during the Vietnam War. What did you do? I served so that people like you can write in a paper and call others yellow belly cowards. I’m tired of you right wingers who are quick to wave the flag as our boys get killed over a lie, but you never served yourself.

You are pathetic.

Attention city commission. Why is it that you think that your city workers should be exempt from paying a $4 surcharge at a bank where your employees are not members? Are you so blind to

think that the $4 surcharge is only aimed at you and your employees? The $4 surcharge is leveled at every man or woman who comes to Wachovia and does not have an account there. My account is at Southtrust. So to avoid a surcharge I opened a free checking account at Wachovia. Whoopdee doo! I know that there are more pertinent issues for the commission to deal with.

Get to them!

Well, well, well. Chuck Walker is back!

He resurrected himself faster than Jason Voorhees from the Friday the 13th horror flicks. Be warned Augusta! A meager and paltry group may have been with the Senator at his restaurant, BL’s, when he announced his return to politics.

However, he is routinely making trips to Atlanta telling all there how we here in Augusta have forgiven him and are clamoring for him to get back into the fray. Walker is telling them in Atlanta how Augusta is begging him to set things straight. Augusta, do yourself a favor. Laugh. Laugh hard. When November rolls around, you will have plenty of time to cry.

Diane Ford gets to be vice chair of the Columbia County Commission and immediately announces she’s going to run “one more time.” Voters beware: Ford, like Mercer, has tolerated and supported the illegal Rain Tax. Both of these individuals who claim to be Republicans have demonstrated their love of big taxes and big spending. Real Republicans favor and work for lower taxes; hence, don’t be misled by the claims of either Ford or Mercer.

So over 300 Richmond County workers don’t have bank accounts. Well, who have they hired, the bankrupt, the overdrawn

Words “I think our whole war on drugs needs to be looked at ... and on the other hand you’ve got Rush Limbaugh getting thousands of [prescription pills] and he’s making millions of dollars and he’s out on the street.”

— DeKalb County District Attorney J. Tom Morgan, quoted in The Atlanta Journal-Constitution in a recent article detailing his 21-year career as a prosecutor. Morgan said crack cocaine users, for instance, go to prison while people like Limbaugh get a slap on the wrist. Morgan, who announced he is leaving before his third term to work in private practice, also told the paper that he fears juries will continue to have a distrust of police, which could lead to more acquittals in the future.

check writers, the credit risks? Who doesn’t have a bank account in this era?

I am not so sure I would trust someone to work for me that would rather keep their pay in a rolled-up sock, under the mattress or all in their pocket. Wachovia has offered a free account that all you have to do is walk up to the ATM and do all your banking right there. Why should I have to wait in line while you argue over a $4 fee or, for that matter, why should my bank treat you any better than they treat me? I have free checking because I have direct deposit. Try it some time. To Mr. Williams: If the $4 fee is going to keep someone from eat-

ing then maybe you should offer one heck of a pay raise. I only hope Wachovia doesn’t bend to the pressure of Richmond County because fair is fair.

I would do my part to see enough business was moved to Wachovia if the county actually did take their (taxpayers’) money and leave.

Oh boy! That Charlie Norwood, U. S. Rep. from the 9th District, is surely talented. Why? Because he can talk out of both sides of his mouth at the same time.

Example: he rails about bringing pork home and then votes for it. Inconsistent to say the least. Norwood has been in

Washington too long for he has now become a professional politician and forgotten about the people he was elected to serve.

Lord of the Rings was set in Middle Earth, where personal sacrifice for the greater good of all was the norm. Lord of the Ring Dings is set in the Augusta Commission chambers, where the greater good of all is sacrificed for personal gain.

The rantings against Charles Walker, Sr. by the Metro Spirit’s “Insider” in the January 22 issue needs a correction. The Insider referred to Don Cheeks as the Democratic state senator from the 23 District. Don Cheeks is not a Democrat.

He is a turncoat Republican. I also want to enlighten the Insider that by this time next year, we will be referring to Mr. Walker as Senator Charles Walker (D-22) because he is going to whip the socks off Randy Hall.

Well, you’re just not Augusta if you don’t drive a brand spanking new pickup truck or SUV. Anybody driving a little four-cylinder car like myself just gets ran slap over by them!

I hope Paul Cook, his wife and both of the Greenbaums continue with their angry diatribes. The anger of the tax and spend Liberal left loonies has killed Dean’s chances, will do Kerry in next and finally will put George W. Bush back in the White House for four more years of real economic growth. Keep up the good work!

The answer to last week’s eighth whine is “no.” To prevent the masses from digging in last week’s trash, let me repeat the question. “Are there any decent women left in Augusta?”

It’s election time and once again Congressman Norwood is meddling in local and state politics. This time he stabbed Columbia County resident Bill Coleman in the back in favor of a downtowner for the DOT board. For those who don’t remember, Bill is the son of the late “Ol’ Man” Roscoe Coleman of McDuffie County; a shrewd and strong Republican Party district chairman during the last decade. I guess Bill can commiserate with Alvin Starks, the former Conservative, black, Republican Party county chair whom Norwood torpedoed last year.

OK, so Mayor Bob and the powers that be want to build a new Metro Complex, Super-Duper, Civic/Convention Center at the cost of the taxpayers via a one-cent sales tax or whatever. I’ve been to concerts, plays, musicals, galas, rodeos, Christmases in the South, etc., etc. since the Civic Center was built, and never once has every seat been filled. Yet tonight, I called about tickets to the USCA bull riding thing, and was told, very rudely I might add, that this event was sold out. My question is why doesn’t the Civic Center sponsor bull-riding events every night? That way, it might actually make some money instead of sucking money away from the taxpayers.

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So now there are spacecraft from Earth on Mars. Watch out Earth! Can you just hear those Martians? Darn those Earthlings! They’ve destroyed their Earth! Now, they’re looking to plunder and destroy Mars! Those poor Martians!

They’re hiding deeper than Saddam!

Since 1940

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— Call our Whine Line at 510-2051 and leave your comments. We won’t use your name. Fax your whines by dialing (706) 733-6663 or e-mail your whines to whine@metrospirit.com.

Thumbs Up Thanks to the 12 jurors in the Reinaldo Rivera case, this area will be rid of a truly horrific individual that brutally raped and killed a number of local women without any guilt or

remorse. Rivera’s attorneys claimed he was mentally ill and therefore should be spared the death penalty, but these jurors didn’t buy it. Justice was served.

Thumbs Down Say it ain’t so, Andy. On Sunday, Jan. 25, Augusta Commissioner Andy Cheek was arrested and charged with driving under the influence, according to The Augusta Chronicle. Cheek reportedly had a blood alcohol level of 0.11. Not only was drinking and driv-

ing a stupid and dangerous thing to do on his part, but Cheek’s actions put a permanent knife into his political future. South Augustans don’t tolerate sinners and that’s exactly how a DUI will play out in Cheek’s neck of the woods. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb.

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8 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

DUI Decries “Depraved Agenda” of Planned Parenthood Letters to the Editor

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Dear Editor, On the anniversary of Roe v. Wade, Ms. Mary Beth Pierucci’s gloat over the excitement she experiences when a woman has the legal right to make the choice to kill her pre-born baby is astounding, shocking and downright frightening. With the unrepentant audacity of a segregationist who justifies his own immoral and warped world view, Ms. Pierucci sets forth her employer’s depraved agenda to be a partner in the killing of innocent human life in the name of “choice.” She decries those who would strive to counsel a person in an unwanted pregnancy to spare the life of their innocent unborn child. She prefers

the option of the choice of cold-blooded death of the baby rather than the more humane choice for the wide range of other options that exist, all of which spare a human life!

Reinaldo Rivera has admitted to being a cold-blooded, psychopathic serial killer who, given the choice, will kill again with great excitement and pleasure, all this while still being a good husband and father! Does that goodness then justify his deadly actions? Some would say that he was not in his “right mind” when he made his exciting choice to kill in cold blood. Fortunately, Mr. Rivera will be held accountable by the law of the land and by Almighty God. Thank God for laws that limit our cold-blooded choices,

even if we are doing other supposed good works!

Yet, Planned Parenthood representatives take great pleasure that they and other “right minded” people can participate in the slaughter of millions of innocent pre-born children with protection under the law of our great land. While they, unlike Mr. Rivera, will not be held accountable in any American court of justice, they will be held accountable before God, especially if they killed in their “right mind.” May God have mercy on them.

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Defends Zell Miller, Criticizes Democrats Dear Editor,

Experience

The 22-28 January edition of the Metro Spirit contained a letter to the editor from Paul L. Cook in which he accused Senator Zell Miller of being a hypocrite for exposing the Democratic Party for its present radical leftist agenda. Mr. Cook mentioned Senator Miller’s support of Bill Clinton as evidence of hypocrisy.

Mr. Cook should be reminded that Bill Clinton’s politics were far to the right of the present Democratic Party. One need look no further than some of the whines being sent in from present day Democrats (“George W. Bush is worse than Hitler,” “Bush is the real terrorist”) to understand why Zell Miller is having problems with his party affiliation. Mr. Cook might consider his own hypocrisy in contemplating the following unpleasant truths: Democrats make a big noise about their support for women’s rights

unless those women happen to have been raped or beheaded by Saddam Hussein’s minions. Democrats profess to be against hate speech but engage in the most vile forms of it by equating George W. Bush with Hitler and Osama Bin Laden.

Democrats claim to be distressed by the loss of manufacturing jobs, yet their solution (as Howard Dean gleefully reminds us) is to raise the price of everything on the shelves of Wal-Mart. The present day Democratic Party has turned its back on too many Americans. Blacks and Hispanics are entitled to school choice. “No!” say the Democrats. “Make them go to failing public schools.” (Many prominent Democrats, of course, send their children to private schools. Isn’t this hypocrisy, Mr. Cook?) Small businesses are the major engine for creating jobs in America. What do present day Democrats want to do to small businesses? Raise their taxes, of course. Who

ultimately pays these taxes? You guessed it: the same people the Democrats want to punish at Wal-Mart. The combination of high prices and tax hikes being proposed by today’s Democrats would lead to economic suicide. The world is changing, Mr. Cook. The horse and buggy have been replaced by the automobile. The typewriter has given way to the computer. Black and Hispanic Americans hold prominent positions in the Bush administration. And Zell Miller ought to be concerned about today’s Democratic Party. The question is whether that former honorable American political institution can survive the Paul Cooks of this world and move on to a deeper understanding of today’s America. Senator Miller didn’t leave his party, Mr. Cook.

You left him. Would that you would leave the rest of us.

— Keith Shafer

the New Standard

www.metrospirit.com

9 M E T R O

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Goodbye, Molly Elaine and Molly spend Molly’s last day together.

A

few years ago, I met an artist and her dog. Elaine van der Linden was having a show now that she and her husband had found themselves alone in an empty nest — well, alone except for a little cocker spaniel with Shirley Temple curls.

In the course of the conversation, she told me that Molly had been a pound puppy with matted hair and infested with fleas and worms. It was the little dog’s huge anime eyes that had won her over.

The relationship that developed between the two soon began to resemble those between kids and dogs in movies: She took Molly everywhere she could, even out for the occasional burger.

It wasn’t long before I began to see van der Linden’s name in print quite often as she tussled with Richmond County Animal Control as the leader of Molly’s Militia, the animal rescue squad that the spaniel had inspired her to put into action. Van der Linden had begun spending much of her time adopting animals and putting them into foster homes, then going about finding permanent families for them.

Well, the organization’s namesake, Molly, succumbed to cancer this month,

after living with van der Linden for the last five years. When I called her, she recounted the same story I had first heard in her living room the day I’d met her and Molly, only this time there were tears.

“We noticed it (her illness) in November.

She was drooling. I knew she didn’t feel good by the way she was acting,” van der Linden added.

Molly had a tumor under her long, floppy ear, van der Linden said, which went unnoticed by family, vet and groomer. But, she added, Molly had been in good health up until then, after going through heartworm treatment and putting on weight once she’d been adopted.

“The night before we had to put her to sleep, she was the worst,” van der Linden said. Molly had been choking on the tumors that had grown in her throat, and treatments had not been effective, van der Linden said. “I can’t imagine how it is to have tumors in your throat. That must be a scary feeling.”

Van der Linden said that the decision to stay with Molly while she was being put to sleep was a very difficult one. It wasn’t something she wanted to see, but Molly had been abandoned once before, and she had no intention of leaving her to

experience her last minutes alone. So she stayed, and gazed into Molly’s eyes until it was over.

She’s having her cremated.

“I couldn’t bury her outside,” she said, explaining that Molly was afraid of thunderstorms. Now, she said, she’s going to keep the dog’s ashes inside with her. After all, they were together every possible minute that they could be while Molly was alive.

“I think I see her,” she said tearfully. “I slept with her every night. She was the first thing I saw in the morning and the last thing I saw at night.”

The only place she refused to take her, she said, was back to the pound during dog rescues, for fear of triggering bad memories. But van der Linden herself visited the Richmond County Animal Shelter often, which she says has become a good facility over the past few years.

“Even the employees out there shed some tears for Molly,” she said.

And, yes, she added, she is going to continue with her work. “Oh yeah, stronger than ever. ... She’s been my driving force ever since I started it and she’s my driving force now.”

She said that taking on Molly and

By Rhonda Jones

starting Molly’s Militia completely changed her life.

“I was 49 years old and I hadn’t had a dog since I was 16. We always had cats.

She just motivated me to start Molly’s Militia. It was tough. I had to get shelter licenses, then got non-profit status. It took me a long time.”

But the group became a quick success, operating solely through the efforts of volunteers. “Thank God, I have people who can handle everything if I’m not there.” She said that her volunteers spend a lot of gas on their missions of mercy, as well as buying dog treats for the dogs. “I don’t think you can pay people to do what my volunteers do.”

She said that she has about 40 families who foster animals. But of course, she added, she always needs more — more volunteers, more money, more everything. Because it doesn’t look like there’s going to be a shortage of dogs in need.

If you are interested in volunteering, making a donation, adopting a Molly’s Militia pooch, or would just like to learn more, visit the Web site at www.mollysmilitia.org. You can reach Elaine van der Linden at (803) 279-7003.

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13 M E T R O

Mars Tripping

S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

By Brian Neill

Photo by NASA

F

unding and accomplishing the goal of sending a manned space flight to Mars is not only doable, but our obligation as Americans and explorers.

At least that’s what Joe Edwards and Susan Kilrain, two individuals with ties to Augusta who possess more than just a little knowledge about space travel, think.

Edwards is currently the chairman and CEO of the National Science Center/Fort Discovery and was also an astronaut aboard the Space Shuttle Endeavor during NASA’s eighth docking mission with the Russian space station, Mir, in 1998.

Kilrain, formerly Susan Still, piloted two missions aboard the Space Shuttle Columbia in 1997. Kilrain was born in Augusta and her parents, Sue and Joseph M. Still, a physician for whom Doctors Hospital’s burn center is named, still live here.

Both Edwards and Kilrain feel that going back to the moon, and eventually to Mars — a proposal President George W. Bush recently floated — is just a natural progression of this country’s spirit of exploration, which extends from

the first settlers of Jamestown to astronauts working aboard orbiting laboratories in space.

However, they also know that in this time of war, terrorism and an uncertain future for the economy, such space journeys may be the last thing on people’s minds.

“With the world situation, I think it’s going to be a difficult sell to the average American,” Kilrain said by phone from Virginia, where she now works for the U.S. Navy, having retired from NASA. “But when we went to the moon, we didn’t know what we’d find there. When Lewis and Clark went exploring, they didn’t know what they’d find there. It’s in our blood and in our souls to explore and I think there’s a lot to be gained from sending a manned mission to Mars, maybe not in the near term, but certainly in the long term.”

Edwards agrees there will likely be skeptics, but thinks there is too much to be gained not to commit to the venture.

“Well, I think in an election year, there’s going to be a certain percentage of detractors right off the bat, regardless of who proposed it,” Edwards said. “But

Photo by NASA

it’s doable and all we have to do is make up our minds that we’re going to make it happen and continue to fund it and we’ll get back to the moon and we’ll get out to Mars. And as we continue to develop our propulsion systems, we’ll get out to the outer planets as well.”

Having long been the stuff of science

fiction books and movies, Edwards realizes some may consider a trip to Mars to be a fantasy quest.

But he asks people to consider how quickly the science of aeronautics has evolved in just the 100 years since the Wright brothers first took to the sky.

Edwards has also witnessed some continued on page 14

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continued from page 13 skeptics of pioneering ideas eat their words over the years.

The day after Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong landed on the moon on July 20, 1969, Edwards recalled, The New York Times issued an editorial apology to Robert Goddard, the father of American rocketry, whom the paper had once ridiculed for suggesting man would one day embark on a lunar mission.

“I don’t think this is pie in the sky; I think this is real,” Edwards said. “I mean, this is the way life is for us today. We are so fortunate ... Other global communities have only accomplished a fraction of what we’ve accomplished in terms of our spacebased, exploratory efforts.”

Bush recently announced plans to seek funding to put astronauts back on the moon by 2020. The plan would involve decommissioning the space shuttle program by 2010 to create a new vessel for the task. The president also suggested that the moon would eventually be used as a point of departure for a mission to Mars.

Kilrain said the moon would be easier than Earth to depart from for a Mars journey because of its lack of gravity and atmosphere, and also from the standpoint of environmental safety in the event a nuclear propulsion system was used.

Saying that “human beings are headed into the cosmos,” Bush said he plans to seek an additional $1 billion in funding for NASA over the next five years.

NASA proposed a budget for next year of $16.2 billion — an increase of 5.6 percent over its current budget — in order to be fiscally in shape to embark on Bush’s plan.

However, a recent Associated Press poll found that more than half of respondents would rather see those additional dollars spent on American soil than on rocks from Mars.

Some experts also have said that the funding likely needed for the moon-andMars effort will far exceed anything the president and NASA have talked about in recent weeks.

Edwards, however, thinks that whatever the cost, a Mars trip would be worth it in terms of the information it would give us about the universe and our own planet Earth.

“The last number I saw for a Mars expedition was a 10-year effort that would cost a total of $60 billion to establish a permanent human presence on Mars,” Edwards said. “You know, $60 billion is a lot of money, but we just dropped, I think, $87 billion into Iraq, and that does not count the war itself.

So rarely will there be a comfortable time where it’s economical to do something like this, but the benefits to humankind through doing something like this, both tangible and intangible, I think are very important.”

Edwards said that NASA compiled a list of more than 30,000 items and technologies the space program has contributed to our society since its creation in 1958 — everything from grooved highways and winter, radial tires for better traction to the digital signal processing used today for MRIs and CT scans.

“You know, the list just goes on and on,” Edwards said. “So I think there are a couple of ways to justify the risk and expense associated with it.”

Risk is definitely a factor familiar to both Edwards and Kilrain.

The two astronauts had friends and former classmates aboard the Space Shuttle Columbia, which burst into flames and disintegrated during its reentry descent in February of last year.

Although both had ended their careers with NASA by the time the accident continued on page 16

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16 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

Photo by Brian Neill

Joe Edwards, former space shuttle astronaut and chairman and CEO of the National Science Center/Fort Discovery, stands next to one of two remote-controlled model Mars rovers on display at the science center.

continued from page 14 occurred, neither say the tragedy would have dissuaded them from going back up again.

“I was just beginning my road toward becoming an astronaut when Challenger blew up. Of course, it was very devastating and sad, but it didn’t sway my goal at all,” Kilrain said. “We all know it’s risky and we accept that risk. It’s worth it to us. That being said, the astronauts on Columbia, they were my friends. Many of them were my classmates and their families were my friends, so it is very devastating.

But on the other hand, I think every one of them would say that they would do it again. And their spouses and daddies and mommies all died doing what they loved and what they believed in.”

Said Edwards: “Exploring space is a very, very difficult thing to do. It incurs risks. Risks of failure and risks of losing a human life, that far exceed anything we know in our daily lives. But it’s a very special thing, because even with those risks — you know, the chance of losing a space shuttle during the ascent is like 1 in 250 — there’s still a line of people waiting to go up there.”

Kilrain and Edwards were excited when they saw the first images that were transmitted back to NASA from the Spirit Mars Rover.

Though Spirit encountered technical problems, a second rover, Opportunity,

landed on Mars on Jan. 25 and has dazzled scientists with its images.

The initial Spirit images reminded Kilrain of ones she saw while orbiting the Earth in Columbia.

“When I was in space in July of ‘97, the Pathfinder landed on Mars,” Kilrain recalled. “So I was getting footage from the Pathfinder on the Space Shuttle and I just thought that was the ‘wowest’ thing. You know, that while I was in space, another vehicle landed on another planet and I was able to see photographs of it. And so it was very reminiscent of that to me.”

Though saying the quality of Spirit’s images were much better, Edwards said they reminded him of photos sent back from the Mars Viking Lander in 1976, when he was just entering college.

He only wishes there were astronauts on the planet to better facilitate the search for clues about Martian history.

“I look at those (Mars rover images) as they come out day by day and I wish we had a human being or a group of human beings on that planet exploring square miles,” Edwards said.

“You know, week after week after week, looking for fossilized life, looking for evidence of water, trying to understand the physical processes that produced the planet and caused it to go through the changes that gave us the Mars as you know it today.”

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Mars by the Numbers Two — number of moons Mars has. They are Phobos and Deimos.

Phobos has a radius of 18 miles (compared with 2,795 miles for our own moon), but is more potato-shaped than spherical. Deimos is somewhat rounder and about half the size of Phobos.

-270 to 80 — degrees in Fahrenheit that represent Mars’ lowest temperature at its winter pole to the average temperature on its sunlit side during summer, respectively.

July 4, 1965 — date of Mariner 4’s arrival at Mars. The orbiter sent back the first-ever images of the red planet to NASA scientists.

Photo by NASA

Susan Kilrain And as for the commonly held belief that life exists on Mars, both astronauts feel that, if not there, it definitely exists somewhere else in the universe besides Earth.

“I think that the same set of circumstances that created life here on Earth certainly have to exist somewhere else,” Kilrain said. “Now, I can’t possibly imagine that it’s (a source of life) close enough that we’ll ever get there in my lifetime, wherever ‘there’ may be. But to me, I think it’s a little self-centric to think that we’re the only life in this huge universe with billions of solar systems and what not.”

“The interesting thing about going to Mars,” Edwards said, “is that a couple of million years ago, Mars was a lot like Earth. It had a nice, thick atmosphere of very similar composition. It had liquid water on the surface. And anyplace on Earth where there’s liquid water, even if there’s no sunlight or oxygen, there’s life. At the bottom of the very depths of the ocean, at the base of steam vents where lava is leaking out of the Earth’s crust, there are microbes that exist without light and without oxygen that consume sulfur.”

Though still a source of debate in scientific circles, Edwards also pointed to a Mars meteorite found on Earth in 1996 that some theorized contained fossilized microbes.

If former or current life were discovered on Mars, Edwards said, it could raise some important philosophical questions about our own planet.

“And this is the interesting thing about it: Something went drastically wrong on Mars eons ago,” Edwards said. “How does what happened to Mars, how is that connected to the climatic, the geologic processes that occur here on Earth? You know, is what happened to Mars somewhere in our future? Or will it never happen to us?

Or by understanding what happened, will it help us care for our planet even better than we’re doing today?”

Dec. 2, 1971 — Russia’s Mars 3 is the first spacecraft to land on Mars. The lander managed to transmit 20 seconds of video data to the Mars 3 orbiter before failing.

35 million — minimum distance in miles of Mars from Earth.

24 hours, 37 minutes — length of a Martian day.

687 — number of Earth days in a Martian year.

78,000 feet — the height of Mars’ Olympus Mons, the largest mountain in the solar system.

For additional Mars information, check out NASA’s Web site at: www.nasa.gov.

Also: The National Science Center/Fort Discovery, One Seventh St. on the Riverwalk, recently unveiled “Project: Mars Rover,” an interactive exhibit featuring two 1/4-scale rovers in a simulated Mars landscape. The rovers are remotely controlled by visitors and move and process images much like the actual rovers currently on Mars. Fort Discovery is open from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Saturday and from noon to 5 p.m. on Sunday.

Admission is $8 for adults and $6 for children 4-17, military personnel and seniors age 55 and over.

Children under 4 are free.

For more information, call (706) 821-0200.

Photo by NASA

17 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

18 M E T R O S P I R I T

Bite

Time Stands Still at Luigi’s

By Amy Fennell Christian

J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

F

rank Sinatra on the jukebox. Dimly lit booths with coat hooks and smaller jukeboxes displaying hits mostly from the 1940s and ‘50s.

A Venetian mural running the length of one wall.

It’s not until you step into an old-world restaurant like Luigi’s that you realize how much dining has changed in the past 20 or 30 years. And once you do visit, you realize that not all change is good.

At Luigi’s, for instance, you’ll not find chipper, perky young waitrons (yes, I stole that from Cliff Bostock) in casual uniforms eager to chat you up like you’re their new best friend, but equally as eager to get you in and out quickly to make way for the next customer. Here, you’ll not find generic décor and even more generic music competing against the usually cavernous space’s ear-splitting din of background noise.

At Luigi’s, time stands still and you get the feeling that not much has changed since it first opened more than 50 years ago. The wait staff is friendly without being artificially chummy, the décor (part ‘50s kitsch, part Chicago “family” hangout, with a little Augustaarea memorabilia mixed in) is anything but ordinary and, if the restaurant wasn’t so small, the music might make you feel like dancing.

You may first come for the atmosphere, but the hearty Italian and Greek menu, especially on a cold winter night, is reason enough to stay.

Ask almost anyone who’s been to Luigi’s and they’ll probably recite their favorite dishes by heart: the Greek Avgolemono soup, toasted ravioli and baked lasagna with Italian sausage. That last dish is indeed tough to resist, although it doesn’t resemble the inches-thick, layered entrée most people associate with the name.

This version has all the elements — sauce, pasta sheets, cheese, meat — but in a pleasant jumble, and the only thing wanting is more of the wonderful ricotta filling. You can also request lasagna with meatballs, although the sausage is a much better option.

The pasta dishes at Luigi’s are pretty much limited to spaghetti, lasagna and ravioli. It may not sound like much variety, but look a little closer and you’ll find over a dozen different kinds of spaghetti alone. It comes as plain as a meat or marinara sauce, or as adventurous as Greek style with burnt butter and parmesan to a version with fried chicken livers and meat sauce.

It may be hard to stray from the Italian stand bys, but the Greek dishes on the menu are by far the most interesting. Take our recent appetizer of Tiropittes (cheese puffs) and Spanakopittes (spinach puffs), $5.50 for each order of four. Although not on the menu, our waitress offered to bring us two of each when we couldn’t decide which we wanted.

Both fillings were surrounded by crunchy and flaky phylo dough, and while both were good, the spinach was definitely more flavorful and tasted as if it had been sautéed with lemon.

Most entrées at Luigi’s come with a salad, usually either Greek or Italian. They’re small but fresh, and my Greek salad was liberally (maybe a bit too much so) doused with a tangy oil and vinegar dressing.

Branching out from my usual lasagna, I decided to try something from Luigi’s Greek offerings. And while I have friends who swear by the baked chicken with olive

oil, lemon and herbs, as well as the Greek-style chicken livers, I went with the Moussaka ($11) — a dish made up of eggplant, seasoned ground beef and a béchamel sauce.

It came to the table looking, and tasting, like an upscale shepherd’s pie, with the sturdy béchamel sauce standing in for the usual mashed potato topping. The ground beef and eggplant filling was almost sweet and tasted of nutmeg. It wasn’t at all what I’d expected but the flavor combination was both surprising and good.

It came with rice pilaf, which I chose over the steak fries, and while I didn’t expect much of it, I ended up liking the wellflavored and al dente side very much.

My husband ordered another favorite, the chopped steak provolone ($11.50) served with sautéed onions, peppers and mushrooms with a side of steak fries. Pure comfort food heaven.

Luigi’s also has a selection of steaks and seafood, and while they don’t have a children’s menu, they’ll happily suggest a half-order of pasta for the little ones. They have a small selection of mostly Greek desserts, of

Winter is the perfect time for hearty fare at Luigi’s like Moussaka (foreground) and chopped steak provolone.

which one of the most popular is Penny’s Delight, vanilla ice cream topped with crumbled baklava. The phylo pastry with nuts, honey and spices is great by itself, but even better as an ice cream topping.

There are few things that disappoint at Luigi’s, but one would be the bread they serve with each meal. It seems rather drab compared to the rest of the food, especially served with little packets of butter with the name brand stamped on the lid.

I always expect a little more, but perhaps they realize that with the abundance of more interesting choices, bread is probably the last thing on most patrons’ minds.

Luigi’s is located at 590 Broad Street, (706) 722-4056, and is open 5-10 p.m. Monday through Saturday, and from 11:30 a.m.-2 p.m. on Friday. They accept most major credit cards.

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Arts

& Entertainment

Mercy Me Finds Mainstream Success

T

he mainstream success of Mercy Me’s song, “I Can Only Imagine,” took the band by surprise, says bass player Nathan

Cochran.

“It’s not something we planned for,” he says. “We actually kind of joked about it (crossing over to mainstream radio). It’s so blatantly a Christian song.”

What “I Can Only Imagine” did, though, was something virtually unheard of in the radio business; built mainstream pop success through word-of-mouth. Listener callin requests were the catalyst that propelled the song onto playlists across the country.

Though the song, with its explicitly Christian message, had done well in the Christian music world and won a 2002 Dove Award for song of the year, the band and music executives weren’t looking for crossover success. In fact, “I Can Only Imagine” was off a 2001 release, and at the time Mercy Me experienced radio success, they were touring in support of their 2002 album, “Spoken For.” “It took us by surprise, but with everything that’s happened, it’s been a really genuine and cool experience,” says Cochran.

“Everyone’s been open and responsive to what we have to say. I guess one of the coolest things is for the mainstream audience, we’re getting to do what we’ve always done, lead worship. But now you’re doing it for people (for whom) everything that’s said from the stage is pretty new to them. It’s the coolest. It’s fun to watch somebody who is not around a church or church people all the time, it’s fun to watch their reaction, and their reaction is always genuine and truthful.”

The song, penned by lead singer Bart Millard as a reaction to his father’s passing, seems to have made a strong connection with people.

“I think there are probably a few different reasons. I think the biggest one probably is that everyone has lost a loved one or someone they knew. We can all relate to that feeling of loss and searching for hope,” Cochran says. “I think that with the things that have happened in this world, it’s a song of hope for a lot of people.”

“I Can Only Imagine” has also made an impact with Mercy Me’s colleagues. Both

Amy Grant and country singer Jeff Carson have recorded covers of the song.

“It’s pretty cool,” says Cochran. “It’s always an honor to see people that you consider your peers giving you respect in that way. It’s confirmation that God’s doing something special in your life. It’s a tangible way to see that things happening in your ministry are having an effect on people.”

Although other Christian artists have broken through to mainstream radio popularity, most deliver their messages with metaphor.

“Honestly, I think, from what mainstream DJs are telling us, they honestly don’t want Christian artists to water down what they say,” Cochran says. “A lot of them enjoyed playing ‘Imagine,’ because for so long, they played people like Eminem, who are real

By Lisa Jordan

passionate about what they have to say.

Most everyone we’ve talked to said, ‘If it’s a good song, we’ll play it.’ I think that’s what everyone is looking for, is someone who’s real about what they’re doing and believes it. We had a few DJs tell us that they’re having people call in and thank them for playing a song, and they never get people call and thank them for playing songs.”

Something that hasn’t changed for Mercy Me is their devotion to family. The band typically spends about 200 days per year on the road, but with new families sprouting up for most of the band members, Cochran expects the band to spend a little less time on the road.

“We’ve finally held to the promise we

The Imagine tour features Mercy Me, Amy Grant and Bebo Norman.

made to our wives to stay home some more,” he says. “We make our families first and our priorities first. We’re fortunate that they can come on the road with us a bit.

Three of us now have children. It’s a lot of fun; they have fun running up and down the hallways of the bus.”

Fans of Mercy Me can expect a new album, coming out in April of this year.

They’re currently putting the finishing touches on it. They’re also embarking on the Imagine tour with Amy Grant and Bebo Norman. The Imagine tour comes to Augusta’s Bell Auditorium Feb. 7. The show starts at 7 p.m. Tickets are $26 in advance, $36 for gold circle seats and $21 for groups of 15 or more. Call 722-3521 for more information.

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8

DaysA Week

Arts

Auditions

CSRA MUSICIANS AND DIRECTORS GUILD is soliciting new members on Feb. 1 at 7 p.m. at Mount Vernon Baptist Church. For more information, call 951-1425.

ENOPION THEATRE COMPANY is looking for volunteers to act, sing, sew, build and more for their new musical, “Creation.” Applications are available at www.imaryproductions.com or by calling (803) 442-9039.

SWEET ADELINES HARMONY RIVER CHORUS OPEN REHEARSAL for singers each Thursday at 7 p.m. at Church of Christ, 600 Martintown Rd. in North Augusta.

They are on the lookout for voices in the lower ranges.

Contact Mary Norman at (803) 279-6499.

Education ISRAELI DANCE WORKSHOP at the Augusta Jewish Community Center Sunday afternoons, 4-5 p.m. Open to teens and adults; no experience or partners are necessary. Cost is $2 per session, with the first session free. For information or to schedule a pre-class beginner/refresher session, contact Jackie Cohen, 738-9016.

ART CLASSES AND WORKSHOPS are offered yearround at the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art. Classes and workshops are open to toddlers through adults and feature instruction in drawing, painting, photography, pottery, weaving and sculpture. For a newsletter or detailed information on registering for classes at the Gertrude Herbert, call 722-5495. The Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art also offers educational tours; for information, contact the education director at the above telephone number.

ART CLASSES FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS at the Art Factory. The Art Factory also has a homeschool program and scholarships are available. Programs include painting, pottery, pilates, hip hop and modern dance and more. Classes are held at the Art Factory, 418 Crawford Ave., or at the Augusta Jewish Community Center. Call 731-0008 for details.

GEORGIA HERITAGE CELEBRATION at the Morris Museum of Art will feature paper weaving in their Hands-On Art Workshop on Feb. 8 at 2 p.m. The first 25 participants will learn the significance of weaving in Georgia’s colonial period. Admission is free. Call 724-7501 for more information.

CHAMPAGNE DANCE PARTY/OPEN HOUSE, hosted by the Aiken Choral Society, to take place Feb. 7 at 7 p.m. at the Palmetto Ballroom Studio in Aiken. Learn ballroom dancing while sipping champagne. Donations are requested, and all proceeds benefit the Aiken Choral Society. For more information, contact Patricia Hall at (803) 649-9193.

Exhibitions KATHY CAUDILL exhibits in the Etherredge Center Galleries at USC-Aiken Feb. 3-29. Call (803) 641-3305 for additional information.

OIL PAINTINGS BY KATHLEEN BRYAN will be on display at the Gibbs Memorial Library throughout February. 863-1946.

PAINTINGS BY MALAIKA FAVORITE will be on exhibit at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History through the end of February. For more information, call 724-3576.

CERAMICS BY REBAKKAH ROSENBAUER will be on display at the Euchee Creek Branch Library during February. Call 556-9795 for details.

George Winston plays a benefit concert for Golden Harvest Food Bank Jan. 29 at West Acres Baptist Church in Evans.

“ANNE HEBEBRAND: CURRENT WORKS” on display at the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art through March 12.

Artists reception 6-8 p.m. Jan. 23. Call 722-5495.

“BABY-BOOM DAYDREAMS: THE ART OF DOUGLAS BOURGEOIS” will be on exhibit at the Morris Museum of Art through Feb. 15. Call 724-7501 for information.

PAINTINGS BY DIANE DAVIS will be on display at the Gibbs Library throughout January. Call 863-1946.

“DEANNE DUNBAR: OBJECTS OF DESIRE” will be on display at the Rabold Gallery in Aiken through Feb. 14.

For more information, call (803) 641-4405 or e-mail raboldgallery@bellsouth.net.

WORKS BY ROBERT LYON are on display at the Augusta State University Fine Arts Gallery through Feb. 5. Free. Call 737-1444.

CERAMICS BY JULIET DEARING will be on exhibit in the Lower Gallery of the Etherredge Center through Jan. 30. Call (803) 641-3305.

“JACK SPENCER: PHOTOGRAPHS FROM NATIVE SOIL” will be on display at the Morris Museum of Art through Feb. 15. Call 724-7501 for information.

PHOTOGRAPHIC WORKS BY SELLY GOODWIN will be on display in the art hall of Sacred Heart Cultural Center through Feb. 29. Call 826-4700 for more information.

“LET’S PLAY: PASTIMES FROM THE PAST” through Feb. 15 at the Augusta Museum of History. For more information, call 722-8454.

FACULTY ART SHOW OPENING reception at ASU’s Boykin Wright Hall on Feb. 2 at 4:30 p.m.

Dance

THE AUGUSTA INTERNATIONAL FOLK DANCE CLUB meets Thursday evenings at 7:30 p.m. No partners are needed and newcomers are welcome. Call 737-6299 for location and info.

dance the first Saturday of each month, from 7:15-11 p.m. Cost is $7 for members and $10 for non-members. Held at the BPOE facility on Elkdom Court.

Contact Melvis Lovett, 733-3890, or Jean Avery, 8634186, for information.

Music

PRE-FESTIVAL CHORUS CONCERT presented by the Davidson Fine Arts School, will be on Feb. 10 at the Beverly J. Barnhart Theater. Tickets are $5 for adults, $4 for children and senior citizens and $3 for Davidson students. Call 823-6924 ext. 107 for more information.

MONTANA SKIES will perform at the Tuesday’s Music Live series at Saint Paul’s Church at noon on Feb. 10.

Call 722-3463 for ticket prices and information.

THE DANCES OF UNIVERSAL PEACE held the first Saturday of every month, 7-9 p.m., at the Unitarian Church of Augusta, honor the religious traditions of the world through song and movement. Call (803) 643-0460 for more information.

BLACK BOTTOM BISCUITS will be performing in concert at the Washington Center Theatre in Aiken. The concert, presented by the Aiken Woman’s Club, will be at 8 p.m. on Jan 31. The Biscuits play an eclectic mix of bluegrass, country and rock ‘n’ roll. Tickets are $15.

For more information, call Nancy at (803) 648-0221.

AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE UNITED STATES AMATEUR BALLROOM DANCERS ASSOCIATION holds a

GEORGE WINSTON CONCERT to benefit the Golden Harvest Food Bank Jan. 29, 7:30 p.m., at West

Acres Baptist Church in Evans. Please bring nonperishable food items to donate. Tickets are $20 per person. For more information call Laurie Roper Harmon at Golden Harvest Food Bank at 736-1199, ext. 208.

exhibits. General Admission: $8 for adults; $6 for children, seniors and active military. Group rates available.

Operating hours: Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday, noon-5 p.m. Call 821-0200, 1-800-325-5445 or visit their Web site at www.NationalScienceCenter.org.

“DIE FLEDERMAUS” will be presented by the Augusta Opera Jan. 29 and 31 and Feb. 1 at the Imperial Theatre. Jan. 29 and 31 performances are at 8 p.m.; Feb. 1 performance is at 3 p.m. An opera chat will be presented one hour prior to each performance. For tickets and information, call 826-4710.

REDCLIFFE STATE HISTORIC SITE: 1859 mansion of S.C. Governor James Henry Hammond, held by the family for three generations until 1975. Grounds and slave quarters are open Thursday-Monday, 9 a.m.-6 p.m. House tours will be offered at 1, 2 and 3 p.m.

Admission to the grounds is free. Fee for house tours is $3 for adults and children ages 6-17. For more information, call (803) 827-1473. 181 Redcliffe Road, Beech Island.

MAULDIN SERIES is presenting “Jin Hi Kim,” which features Korean instruments at USC Aiken’s Etherredge Center. The presentation is on Feb. 12 at 7 p.m. Call (803) 641-3305 for tickets or more information.

GLEN ROAD, traditional Irish music, will perform at Broadstrokes Gallery on Feb. 11 from 7:30-9:30 p.m.

Call 860-7111 for more information.

Theater

“THE GIRLS ARE BACK IN TOWN” with Chonda Pierce and Sandi Patty at the Bell Auditorium on Feb. 12 at 7 p.m.

Call 1-800-965-9324 for information and ticket prices.

“LONE STAR” AND “LAUNDRY AND BOURBON” will be performed by the USC-Aiken University Theatre Players Jan. 29-Feb. 2 at 8 p.m., with a matinee performance Jan. 31 at 2 p.m. Held at the Etherredge Center. For ticket information, call (803) 641-3305.

“ANNIE, GET YOUR GUN” will be at the Abbeville Opera House Jan. 30-31, Feb. 6-7, 12-14 and 20-21.

Matinee performances are Jan. 31 and Feb. 7, 14 and 21 at 3 p.m. Call (864) 459-2157 for ticket information.

Attractions MOTORIZED TOURS OF HISTORIC AIKEN every Saturday, 10-11:30 a.m. Tours leave from the Washington Center for the Performing Arts.

Reservations are required, and patrons must be age 2 and older. (803) 642-7631.

AUGUSTA CANAL INTERPRETIVE CENTER: Housed in Enterprise Mill, the center contains displays and models focusing on the Augusta Canal’s functions and importance to the textile industry. Hours are Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m. and Sun., 1-6 p.m. Admission is $5 adult, $4 seniors and military and $3 children ages 6-18.

Children under 6 admitted free. Guided boat tours of the Augusta Canal depart from the docks at Enterprise Mill at 11 a.m., 1:30 p.m. and 3 p.m. Saturdays and Tuesdays and Thursdays at 11 a.m. and 1:30 p.m. Tour tickets are $6 adults, $5 seniors and $4 students and children. For tour information, call 823-7089. For other info, visit www.augustacanal.com or call 823-0440.

THE BOYHOOD HOME OF WOODROW WILSON: Circa 1859 Presbyterian manse occupied by the family of President Woodrow Wilson as a child during the Civil War and Reconstruction. Original and period antiques, restored house, kitchen and carriage house. 419 Seventh Street. Open 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Tues.-Sat. Tours available; groups of 10 or more by appointment only.

Admission is $5 adults, $4 seniors, $3 students under 18 and free for ages 5 and under. 722-9828.

AUGUSTA GOLF & GARDENS OF THE GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME features beautiful display gardens, as well as bronze sculptures of some of golf’s greatest masters. Available for rent for a variety of functions. Group discount rates available. Closed Mondays; open from 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Tues.-Sat.; open from 1-5 p.m. on Sunday. Admission is $5.50 for adults; $4.50 for students, seniors and military; $3.50 for children (4-12); free for children 3 and under. Sundays are two for one with a Super Sunday coupon. Annual garden memberships are available. Call 724-4443 or 1-888-874-4443. Also, visit their Web site at www.gghf.org.

NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER’S FORT DISCOVERY: Children and adults alike can immerse themselves in the wonders of science through live demonstrations, virtual realities, Starlab, KidScape and more than 250 hands-on

SACRED HEART CULTURAL CENTER is offering tours of its 100-year-old building. Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m. $1 per person, children free. 826-4700.

HISTORIC COTTON EXCHANGE WELCOME CENTER: Open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sun. 1-5 p.m.

Riverwalk. Free. Call 724-4067.

THE EZEKIEL HARRIS HOUSE: Deemed “the finest 18th century house surviving in Georgia” by the “Smithsonian Guide to Historic America.” Open Saturday, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. General admission is $2; senior admission is $1 and children get in for 50 cents. For more information, call 724-0436.

Museums TOUR OF THE PERMANENT COLLECTION of the Morris Museum of Art will take place on Feb. 8 at 3 p.m.

Admission is free. Call 724-7501 for more information.

“ART AND HEALING” at the Morris Museum of Art will discuss the positive impact of the arts in the healing environment on Feb. 12 at 7 p.m. Admission is $3 for adults, $2 for seniors, students and military. 724-7501.

ARTRAGEOUS SUNDAY: PATCHWORK FRAMES at the Morris Museum of Art Feb. 1, 2 p.m. Free admission.

Call 724-7501 for information.

THINKING ABOUT A NEW POOL Call Charles Evans Pools Complete Pool Construction, Maintenance and Supplies

Charles Evans Pools 476 Flowing Wells Road, D1 • Martinez, GA 30907 • 706-364-0731

• Construction • Full Line Chemicals, Accessories, Parts & Supplies • Liner Replacement • Service & Repair • Pool Cleaning

The Fort Gordon Dinner Theatre Presents...

A Classic British Farce and Comic Masterpiece

by Michael Frayn

February 13, 14, 20, 21, 26, 27 & 28 Dinner, 7 p.m. / Show, 8 p.m.

Civilians ............................................................................................ $32 Seniors (65+), Retirees, DA Civilians & Active Duty E8 & Above ....... $30 Active Duty E7 & Below .................................................................... $20 Show Only ........................................................................................ $15

Call 793-8552 for reservations or visit www.fortgordon.com OPEN TO THE PUBLIC! Produced in cooperation with Samuel French Inc. and the Army Entertainment Program.

“CELEBRATION OF FLIGHT” exhibit at Fort Discovery’s Knox Gallery runs through Jan. 31.

Admission to the exhibit is free with paid general admission to Fort Discovery. For more information, visit www.NationalScienceCenter.org or call 821-0200.

presents

The 2nd Annual

Daddy Daughter Dance

THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART in Ware’s Folly exhibits works by local and regional artists. Art classes, workshops and other educational programming for children, youth and adults are held in the Walker-Mackenzie Studio. Open Tuesday-Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Saturday by appointment only.

Admission is free, but a donation of $2 for adults and $1 for children and seniors is encouraged. Call 7225495 or visit www.ghia.org for more info.

THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY hosts permanent exhibition “Augusta’s Story,” an award-winning exhibit encompassing 12,000 years of local history. For the younger crowd, there’s the Susan L. Still Children’s Discovery Gallery, where kids can learn about history in a hands-on environment. The museum also shows films in the History Theatre and hosts a variety of programs. Located at 560 Reynolds Street. Open TuesdaySaturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sunday 1-5 p.m.

Admission is $4 adult, $3 seniors, $2 kids (6-18 years of age) and free for children under 6. Free admission on Sundays. Call 722-8454 or visit www.augustamuseum.org for more information.

PG14

Saturday, February 7, 2004 7:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. at

The Belair Conference Center Belair Road & I-20 DJ, Dancing & Dinner by Carabba’s $35 per Daddy/Daughter couple $5 per additional daughter $50 per couple at the door

FOR TICKETS CALL 733-2512

INSPIRING ALL GIRLS TO BE STRONG, SMART & BOLD

• Tanning Accessories

THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART hosts exhibitions and special events year-round. Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sundays, noon-5 p.m. Closed on Mondays and major holidays. 1 Tenth Street, Augusta.

Call 724-7501 or visit www.themorris.org for details.

• High Pressure Beds

THE MUSEUM OF LAUREL AND HARDY OF HARLEM, GEORGIA features displays of various Laurel and Hardy memorabilia; films also shown. Located at 250 N. Louisville Street in downtown Harlem. Open 1-4 p.m.

Thursday-Monday. For more information, call 556-3448.

• Stand Up Booths

LUNCH AT NOON LECTURE SERIES held the second Wednesday of every month at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Call the museum at 724-3576 for more information.

• 15 Wolff Tanning Beds

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Walk-Ins Welcome

No Appointments Necessary www.paradiseislanddayspa.com

733-3644

• 210-F Robert C. Daniel Parkway (Adjacent to Chick-Fil-A) New Hours Mon-Sat 6am-Midnight

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24 M E T R O S P I R I T

AN INVESTMENT PLAN AS UNIQUE AS YOUR NEEDS.

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Government Securities

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Money Management

FOR MORE INFORMATION, CONTACT: Sandra P. Gurley Financial Consultant Smith Barney 10th Street, Suite 600 Augusta, Georgia 30901

The Antiques in the Heart of Aiken show and sale will be held Jan. 30-Feb. 1 at the Aiken Center for the Arts.

Special Events SECOND ANNUAL DADDY-DAUGHTER DANCE on Feb. 7 from 7-9 p.m. at the Belair Conference Center. $35 per daddy-daughter, $5 per additional daughter, $50 per couple at the door. For more information or to make reservations, call 733-2512.

(706) 724-2601 • (800) 241-2401 sandra.p.gurley@smithbarney.com

BLACK HISTORY MONTH FRIDAY FLICKS at ASU’s Allgood Hall, room E257 from noon-2 p.m. Contact Amy Connell at 667-4807 for more information. ©2003 Citigroup Global Markets, Inc. Member SIPC. Smith Barney is a division and service mark of Citigroup Global Markets Inc. and its affiliates and is used and registered throughout the world. CITIGROUP and the Umbrella Device are trademarks and service marks of Citicorp of its affiliates and are used and registered throughout the world.

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Looking for Local Live Music?

FREE FILM SERIES Mondays, 6:30 p.m. at the Headquarters Library. Feb. 2 showing of “Ballad of a Soldier,” Feb. 9 showing of “Lost in Translation,” Feb. 16 showing of “American Splendor” and Feb. 23 showing of “Sweet Hereafter.” Call 821-2600 for info.

ANTIQUES IN THE HEART OF AIKEN show and sale will be at the Aiken Center for the Arts Jan. 30-Feb. 1.

Preview party is 7-9:30 p.m. Jan. 29. Tickets to the preview party are $50 each or $95 for two and include a weekend show pass. General admission to the show is $6 for the weekend. Call (803) 641-9094.

MR. AND MRS. CLARKS HILL LAKE PAGEANT is open to all CSRA couples who have been married for 50 years or more. The winning couple will be crowned at a reception on Feb. 14. Nominations due Feb. 1. For information on nominating a couple, call 541-1358.

APPLICATIONS FOR SANDHILLS WRITERS CONFERENCE SCHOLARSHIPS due Jan. 30. Conference is March 18-20 at Augusta State University. For more information, call 737-1500.

Check out Nightlife this week

MCDUFFIE FRIENDS OF ANIMALS holds pet adoptions each Saturday, 1-3 p.m. at Superpetz on Bobby Jones Expressway. Call 556-9090 or visit www.petfinder.com.

COLUMBIA COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and every Sunday from 1-4 p.m. at PetsMart. For more info, call 860-5020.

RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL AND AUGUSTA ANIMAL RESCUE FRIENDS hold pet adoptions at Superpetz off Bobby Jones Expressway every Sunday from 1-4 p.m. Call AARF at 364-4747 or visit www.aarf.net. Adoptions also held at the Richmond County Animal Control Shelter, Tues.-Sun., 1-5 p.m. Call the shelter at 790-6836.

THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. and every Wednesday evening from 5:30-7:30 p.m. at the Pet Center located behind the GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Rd. 261-PETS.

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Out of Town

ARTIST BOB ICHTER’S WORK will be on display at the Aliya Gallery in Atlanta through Feb. 6. Ichter’s work centers on landscapes from around the world, and autumn and dusk are his favorite themes. (404) 892-2835.

“AN EVENING WITH LANGSTON AND MARTIN” will be at Hugh Hodgson Hall at the University of Georgia in Athens, Ga., Feb. 4, 8 p.m. Tickets are $15. Call (706) 542-6396.

CHARLES L. WELTNER FREEDOM OF INFORMATION AWARD BANQUET to benefit the Georgia First Amendment Foundation will be held Jan. 31. For information, call (404) 525-3646.

“522 GEORGIANS: A MEMORIAL” EXHIBIT will be on display at the Tate Center Art Gallery at the University of Georgia in Athens, Ga., Feb. 1-28. Formal opening 7:30 p.m. Feb. 3. For more information, contact Kevin McKee at (706) 542-6396.

“MY FAIR LADY” will be presented by the Alliance Theatre Company in Atlanta through Feb. 29. For tickets and information, call (404) 733-5000.

“FERDINAND THE BULL” will be presented by Alliance Children’s Theatre at the 14th Street Playhouse in Atlanta through March 7. Call (404) 733-4600 or visit www.alliancetheatre.org.

“RAISE THE RAFTERS” gospel music series at Biltmore House in Asheville, N.C., runs weekends through Feb. 8. Call 1-800-543-2961.

“A LION IN WINTER” will be at The New American Shakespeare Tavern in Atlanta through Feb. 1. Optional British pub-style menu available one hour and 15 minutes before the performance. Tickets are $19.50$24.50. Call (404) 874-5299.

AT THE GEORGIA MUSEUM OF ART in Athens, Ga.: “Enchanting Modern: Ilonka Karasz, 1896-1981” through Feb. 8; works by Armin Landeck through Feb. 8; “Decorative Arts at Woodstock” through March. Visit www.uga.edu/gamuseum or call (706) 542-4662 for info.

AT THE HIGH MUSEUM OF ART in Atlanta: “The Undiscovered Richard Meier: The Architect as Designer and Artist” through April 4; “After Whistler: The Artist and His Influence on American Painting” through Feb. 8; and “Verrocchio’s David Restored: A Renaissance Bronze From the National Museum of the Bargello, Florence” through Feb. 8 Call (404) 733-HIGH or visit www.high.org for information.

THE INDEPENDENT ADOPTION CENTER is offering an adoption information session on Feb. 7 from 9:30 a.m.1:30 p.m. at the IAC office in Tucker, GA. For more information or to make reservations, call 800-3854016.

“ROMEO AND JULIET” will be at the New American Shakespeare Tavern on Feb. 6-29. Call (404) 874-5299 for more information.

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“IRON JAWED ANGELS” PREMIERE at the Trustees Theater on Feb. 7 at 7:30 p.m. The film, presented by HBO Films and the Savannah College of Art and Design, is about the women’s suffrage movement and stars Oscar winner Hilary Swank. Contact Caroline Harkleroad at (404) 870-9983 for more information.

S P I R I T

Benefits

J A N

THE LEUKEMIA AND LYMPHOMA SOCIETY’S TEAM IN TRAINING is recruiting volunteers to help in the fight against blood cancers by raising funds as they train to run, walk or cycle in honor of local patients.

Information meeting at the Clubhouse on Washington Rd. Feb. 5 at 6:30 p.m. Call Kate Wicker at (706) 6677101 for more information.

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AUGUSTA BALLET MERCEDES RAFFLE: The Augusta Ballet will raffle off a 2004 Mercedes CLK 320 Cabriolet during May’s First Friday celebration. Tickets are $100 each and may be purchased through the Ballet office at 261-0555.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL is in need of dog and cat food, cat litter and other pet items, as well as monetary donations to help pay for vaccinations. Donations accepted during regular business hours, Tues.-Sun., 1-5 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Call 790-6836 for information.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER BLOOD DRIVES in various locations around the CSRA this month. For detailed information on locations and times to donate, visit www.shepeardblood.org. You may also call Susan Edwards at (803) 643-7996 for information on Aiken locations and Nancy Szocinski at 737-4551 for information on all other locations.

AMERICAN RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVES at the Aiken Red Cross Blood Center on Millbrook Drive and the Augusta Red Cross Blood Center on Pleasant Home Road. The bloodmobile will also stop at various area locations this week. For a complete list, call the Aiken Blood Center at (803) 642-5180 or the Augusta Blood Center at 868-8800.

SALVATION ARMY AUTO AUCTION will be held Feb. 7 at 10 a.m. at the Salvation Army Administrative Office at 1384 Greene St. Over 120 cars, trucks and boats will be auctioned, rain or shine. Pre-registration will be held on Feb. 5-6 from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., and from 8-10 a.m. on Feb. 7. A $5 registration fee is required to bid. Contact Stacey Johnson at 826-7933 for more information.

SAFE KIDS OLDEST CAR SEAT CONTEST at the MCG Children’s Medical Center, Feb. 9-15. The oldest car seat will win their choice of prizes with more to be given at random. Contact Danielle Wong at 721-9566 for more information.

Learning “AN EVENING IN BULGARIA” vicarious travel program Feb. 3, 6:30-8:30 p.m. at Augusta State University.

Learn about the country’s history, culture, customs and cuisine. Cost is $19. Call 737-1636.

USC-AIKEN CONTINUING EDUCATION offers Paralegal Certificate Course, Taming the Wild Child, Conversational French, Italian, Spanish for the Beginner, Sign Language, Debt-Free Living and more. Travelearn learning vacations for adults and Education to Go online courses also available. For info, phone (803) 641-3563.

CULLUM LECTURE SERIES, “South Asia: On a Tryst With Destiny,” continues Feb. 3 with 11:30 a.m. presentation, “Buddhism in South Asia,” and 7 p.m. presentation, “Hinduism in South Asia.” All events held in Butler Hall Auditorium. Visit www.aug.edu/library/cullum2004 or call Michael Bishku, 737-1709, or Jeff Heck, 667-4905.

AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONTINUING EDUCATION is now offering the following classes: Shag, Ballroom,

Works by Bob Ichter will be on display at the Aliya Gallery in Atlanta through Feb. 6. (404) 892-2835.

Line Dance, Beginning and Intermediate Language courses, Interior Design, Acting Workshop, Stained Glass, SAT Review, Power Yoga, Photography, Origami and more.

Also, ASU offers online courses. For more information, call 737-1636 or visit www.ced.aug.edu.

AIKEN TECH CONTINUING EDUCATION offers the following courses: computer technology courses, healthcare courses, contractor programs, drivers education, real estate courses and more. Aiken Tech also offers Education to Go classes online. For more information or to register, call (803) 593-9231, ext. 1230.

Health UNIVERSITY HOSPITAL SUPPORT GROUPS: Bariatric Surgery, Feb. 2, 724-4408; Cancer Share Support Group, Feb. 2, 774-8900; Parents Healing Together, Feb. 2, 774-5800; Living Well With Diabetes, Feb. 12, 774-5798; My Mom Has Breast Cancer, Feb. 5, 7744141; Pink Magnolias Breast Cancer, Feb. 9, 774-4141; Breast Cancer Support, Feb. 9, 774-4141; Better Breathers, Feb. 10, 774-LUNG; Prostate Cancer, Feb. 19, 367-1308.

CHILDBIRTH PREPARATION CLASS Tuesdays, Feb. 3March 9 or Thursdays, Feb. 5-March 11 at University Women’s Center. All classes are from 7-9:30 p.m. and are $75 for the six-week series. To register, call 774-2825.

ANGELS HAVE WHEELS: Medicare recipients suffering from conditions such as arthritis, cardiovascular disease and respiratory disorders who have difficulty walking or propelling a standard wheelchair may be eligible to receive an electric wheelchair. For information on eligibility, call Gregory at 1-800-810-2877.

HEALTHY NUTRITION TIPS with Mona Adams of the Georgia Extension Service at the Appleby Branch Library Jan. 29, 11 a.m.-noon. For more information, call 736-6244.

AUGUSTA BRAIN INJURY SUPPORT GROUP meets the second Thursday of every month, 6 p.m., at Walton West TLC. Brain injury survivors and their family members and caregivers are invited to attend. 737-9300.

FORE THE HEALTH OF IT ADAPTIVE GOLF CLINICS held the first Tuesday of every month at First Tee of Augusta. Physical and occupational therapists from Walton Rehabilitation Hospital will guide the course.

Call 823-8691.

CHRONIC PAIN SUPPORT GROUP meets the first Thursday of every month, 10:30-11:30 a.m. at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital. 823-5294.

STROKE SUPPORT GROUP meets the last Wednesday of the month, 1-2 p.m., in the outpatient classroom at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital. 823-5213.

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL AMPUTEE CLINIC for new and experienced prosthetic users meets the third Thursday of each month, 1-3 p.m. 722-1244.

vides educational resources and guidance for families who have children with developmental delays, disabilities and other specialized health concerns. Free and open to the public; takes place from 6:30-8 p.m. in the main conference room at the Children’s Medical Center.

Call 721-6838 for information.

UNIVERSITY HEALTH CARE SYSTEM COMMUNITY EDUCATION holds workshops, seminars and classes on a variety of topics: weight and nutrition, women’s health, cancer, diabetes, seniors’ health and more.

Support groups and health screenings are also offered.

Call 736-0847 for details.

OB TOUR by the University Women’s Center on Feb. 12 from 7-9:30 p.m. Admission is free. To register or for more information, call 774-2825.

BREAST SELF-EXAM CLASSES offered by the University Breast Health Center on Feb. 9 at 4 p.m.

Admission is free, but registration is required. To register or for more information, call 774-7171.

Kids

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL offers a number of health programs, including Fibromyalgia Aquatics, Water Aerobics, Wheelchair and Equipment Clinics, Theraputic Massage, Yoga, Acupuncture, Children’s Medical Services Clinic, Special Needs Safety Seat Loaner Program, Focus on Healing exercise class for breast cancer survivors and more. Call 823-5294 for information.

SPECIAL STORYTIMES AT THE MAXWELL BRANCH LIBRARY 10 a.m. Feb. 2 and 4. Leon Moore reads Feb. 2 and Jayme Washington-Smalley reads Feb. 4. 7932020.

THE MCG BREAST CANCER SUPPORT GROUP meets the first Thursday of every month at 7 p.m. and provides education and support for those with breast cancer. For information, call 721-1467.

FUNDING YOUR CHILD’S COLLEGE EDUCATION program Feb. 3, 6 p.m., at the Maxwell Branch Library is open to high school juniors and seniors and their parents. Call 793-2020 for information.

DIET COUNSELING CLASSES for diabetics and those with high cholesterol at CSRA Partners in Health, 1220 Augusta West Parkway. Free. Call 860-3001 for class schedule.

SPECIAL STORYTIME with Heather Lopez from the Georgia Council for the Blind Feb. 4, 10:30 a.m., at the Appleby Branch library. Call 736-6244.

PROJECT LINK COMMUNITY LECTURE SERIES is held the first Tuesday of every month and is sponsored by the MCG Children’s Medical Center. Project Link pro-

YOUTH COMPUTER TRAINING for high school students every third Saturday of the month, 1:30-4:30 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 722-6275.

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

children of all ages who participate or are interested in equestrian sports. For more information, contact Lisa Smith at (803) 649-3399.

FREE CAR SEAT EDUCATION CLASSES for parents and other caregivers the third Monday of every month from 9-11 a.m. at MCG Children’s Medical Center.

Registration is required; those who are Medicaid or Peachcare eligible should indicate status during registration and bring a card or proof of income to class in order to receive a free car seat. 721-KIDS. GIRLS INCORPORATED OF THE CSRA AFTER-SCHOOL PROGRAM runs through May 21. Open to girls currently enrolled in kindergarten through high school. In addition to offering specialized programs, Girls Incorporated offers van pick-up at select schools, neighborhood drop-off, homework room and a hot evening meal. For information, call 733-2512.

WEEKLY STORY SESSIONS at all branch libraries. Visit www.ecgrl.public.lib.ga.us for more information.

FIRST SATURDAY STORYTELLING at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum. In addition, there is a tour of the museum. Held 10 a.m.-noon the first Saturday of the month.

Call 724-3576.

VALENTINE CARD WORKSHOP allows you to create a special card for someone special in your life at the Maxwell Branch of the East Central Georgia Library on Feb. 7 at 11 a.m. Ages 8-12 and parents welcome.

Call 793-2020 for more information.

THE SENIOR CITIZENS COUNCIL OF GREATER AUGUSTA AND THE CSRA offers a variety of classes, including ballroom dance, aerobics, quilting, tai chi, Spanish, line dancing, bowling, bridge, computers, drama club/readers theatre and pinochle. For dates and times, phone 826-4480.

SENIORNET provides adults age 50 and over education for and access to computer technology. Many different courses are offered. Contact the USC-Aiken Continuing Education Office at (803) 641-3563.

Sports GREATER AUGUSTA SPORTS COUNCIL AWARDS GALA Feb. 5, 6 p.m., at the Radisson Riverfront Hotel Augusta. Keynote speaker is Terry Bradshaw. Tickets are $75. Call 722-TEAM for more information or order tickets at (803) 278-4TIX. VOLLEYBALL LEAGUE ORGANIZATIONAL MEETING at Citizens’ Park II in Aiken Feb. 3. League is open to players ages 18 and older. Call (803) 642-7761 for info.

NORTH AUGUSTA SPRING RECREATION PROGRAM REGISTRATION Feb. 2-16 at Riverview Park Activities Center for Dixie Youth Baseball, Dixie Boys’ Baseball, Girls’ Softball and Youth Soccer. Call (803) 441-4311 for more information.

Seniors

THE AUGUSTA FENCERS CLUB is now holding registration for beginning classes in foil fencing. Classes are held at the Augusta Fencers Club at 134 Ninth St. To register or for more information, call Dr. Rudy Volkmann at (706) 722-8878.

AARP TAX ASSISTANCE provided Feb. 3-April 13 at Friedman Branch Library on Thursdays, 9 a.m.-1 p.m.; Maxwell Branch Library Tuesdays and Fridays, 10 a.m.2 p.m.; and at the Gibbs Memorial Library Tuesdays, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Call the Friedman Branch at 736-6758, the Maxwell Branch at 793-2020 or the Gibbs Memorial Library at 863-1946 for more information.

THE RAY GUY KICKING AND PUNTING ACADEMY, a national kicking camp and talent search, is coming to Augusta. The camp will be held Feb. 4 from 4-6 p.m. at Evans High School. Admission is free to area middle and high school students, but pre-registration is required. Contact the Greater Augusta Sports Council at 722-8326 for more information.

UNIVERSITY SENIORS CLUB has moved to a new location at 4106 Columbia Rd. University Seniors Club offers health screenings, support groups, health education classes and social activities. For more information, call 868-3231 or 1-800-413-6652.

SPRING BASEBALL REGISTRATION for boys and girls ages 5 and older by Aug. 1, 2004. Registration is through Feb. 2 at Citizens Park II in Aiken. First time players must bring a birth certificate to registration.

Play begins in March. Call (803) 642-7761.

HOME-BASED CARE available for low- to mid-income families seeking alternatives to nursing home placement. To participate, individuals must be aged 60 or up or must have disability status as defined by Social Security Administration guidelines. Applicants must also meet program income guidelines. For more information, contact the CSRA Area Agency on Aging at 210-2018 or 1-888-922-4464.

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL offers Arthritis Aquatics and People With Arthritis Can Exercise. Call 823-5294 for information.

SENIOR VOLUNTEERS NEEDED FOR THE NEW VISITOR CENTER AT PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK to greet visitors, hand out literature and sell merchandise.

Volunteers are asked to commit one Saturday or Sunday per month, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. or 1-5 p.m. Call 8282109 for information.

AIKEN PARKS AND RECREATION offers a multitude of programs for senior adults, including bridge clubs, fitness classes, canasta clubs, line dancing, racquetball, arts and crafts, tennis and excursions. For more information, call (803) 642-7631.

THE ACADEMY FOR LIFELONG LEARNING offers lectures, courses, field trips, discussion groups and community information seminars on a variety of topics to mature adults. For more information, contact the USC-Aiken Office of Continuing Education at (803) 641-3288.

GIRLS’ FAST-PITCH SOFTBALL REGISTRATION through Feb. 2 at Citizens Park II in Aiken. Open to girls ages 7 and older as of Jan. 1, 2004. Play begins in March. First time players must bring a birth certificate to registration. Call (803) 642-7761 for information.

AUGUSTA FUTURITY through Jan. 31 at the AugustaRichmond County Civic Center. Visit www.augustafuturity.com or call 823-3417 for details.

FAMILY Y YOUTH SOCCER REGISTRATION Feb. 23March 12 at Southside Branch. Call 738-6678, 3643669 or 738-6680 for details.

FAMILY Y RECREATIONAL GYMNASTICS session held March 8-May 14. Classes available for toddlers through teens. Call 738-6678.

THE AUGUSTA VOLLEYBALL ASSOCIATION is looking for new members. For more information, visit www.augustavolleyball.com.

AUGUSTA LYNX HOME GAMES Feb. 6-7, 12-13, 19-21 and 26. For tickets, call 724-4423 or visit www.augustalynx.com.

THE AUGUSTA RUGBY CLUB is always looking for new members. Teams available for women and men; no experience necessary. Practice is Tuesday and Thursday nights, 7-9 p.m. at Richmond Academy. For more information, call Don Zuehlke, 495-2043, or e-mail augustarfc@yahoo.com.

You may also visit www.augustarugby.org.

Meetings THE GEORGIA AFRICAN-AMERICAN HISTORIC PRESERVATION NETWORK annual meeting will take place on January 30-31 at Springfield Baptist Church.

The theme for the meeting is “Georgia History Through the Eyes of African-Americans,” and will focus on the contributions of African-Americans to the cultural and structural environment in Georgia. For more information, call Isaac Johnson at (706) 738-1901.

“THE FIRST STEP” DIVORCE RECOVERY WORKSHOP meets Sundays through Feb. 29 from 4-6 p.m. in Room 201 of the Walton Building at First Baptist Church. Free to the public. Free childcare for kids up to age 5. No registration is required. For more information, call 7332236 or visit www.fbcaugusta.org.

BURKE COUNTY GENEALOGY SOCIETY MEETING at the Burke County Library on Feb. 9 at 7 p.m. Call 554-3277 for more information.

CSRA VW CLUB meets every First Friday at 6th and Reynolds St. (Behind the Train Depot). Visit www.csravwclub.org for more information. New Beetles welcomed.

FORT GORDON’S NATIONAL PRAYER BREAKFAST will be held at the Gordon Club on 19th St. on Feb. 11 at 6:30 a.m. Advance tickets are required. For tickets or more information, call 791-4683.

AUGUSTA SKI AND OUTING CLUB meets Feb. 3 at 7 p.m. in the Alamo Room of Lone Star Steakhouse.

Anyone interested in snow skiing, boating, camping, and other outdoor activities, call (803) 279-6186 for more information.

GREEK SYMPOSIUM in celebration of Black History Month at ASU’s Allgood Hall, room N241 on Feb. 5 at noon.

Contact Amy Connell at 667-9592 for more information.

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For more information call 733-0130 1-866-517-7513

Weekly

OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS meets every Sunday night, 7:30 p.m., at Holy Trinity Lutheran Church in North Augusta. For more information, call 278-5156.

NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUP for relatives and friends of drug abusers. No dues or fees. The group meets Mondays at 7 p.m. Call for location. For information, contact Josie, 414-5576, or Lionel, 860-0302.

GAMBLERS ANONYMOUS meets Thursdays, 7:30 p.m., in the basement of Fairview Presbyterian Church. 1800-313-0170.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS: For more information and a meeting schedule, call 860-8331.

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS: If you want to stop using any drugs, there is a way out. Help is available at no cost. Call the Narcotics Anonymous help line for information and meeting schedules at 855-2419.

SEXAHOLICS ANONYMOUS, a 12-step program of recovery from addiction to obsessive/compulsive sexual thoughts and behaviors, meets Wednesdays at 8 p.m. at Christ Church Unity, 2301 Central Ave. Call 339-1204 and leave first name and phone number; a confidential reply is assured.

GUIDELINES: Public service announcements are listed in this section without charge at the discretion of the editor. Announcements must be received by Monday at noon and will be included as space permits. Send to Events, Metro Spirit, P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914 or fax (706) 733-6663. You may also e-mail listings to rhonda.jones@metrospirit.com or lisa.jordan@metrospirit.com. Listings cannot be taken over the phone.

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27

Arts: Education

Art Factory Manufactures Fun

T

he Art Factory’s name brings to mind Seussian manufacturing plants with gramophone-type chutes, where happy little workers waddle from place to place with ecstatic smiles plastered to their faces.

The reality isn’t that far removed.

Program Assistant Shawna Pastor-Price, a former ASU work-study student who fell in love with the Art Factory and turned full-time upon graduation, is absolutely ebullient about the place, which physically consists of two houses on Crawford Avenue and a dance studio at St. Luke United Methodist Church down the street.

She explained that its mission is to give kids, who wouldn’t otherwise have it, a chance to create art. “We work with anyone in the community who has a need for art,” she said. “And that’s everybody.”

One of the ways they accomplish that is partnerships with organizations created to help people like Hope House for Women, the Medical College of Georgia (they have a healing arts program), Augusta Urban Ministries and the Family Y. And those partnerships enable the organization to do what it does best — hold classes and camps. The statement that the Art Factory provides to the public outlines the classes they provide as follows: After-school and Saturday classes are offered during the school year; fine arts classes for homeschooled students are offered during the day; Cherry Tree Crossing community is the site of such activities as visual art, dance and even academic tutoring. There are even classes and seminars for adult students.

Camps are offered in April during spring break and for six weeks during June and July for ages 4-14. If you are interested in enrolling your kids in an art class or in camp, and want more info on the Art Factory, you can attend their Family Fun Day on Feb. 21. There will be a dance performance, pottery on the wheel, visual arts and drumming.

Activities last from 1-5 p.m.

But perhaps you can’t make it out to the Art Factory — the Art Factory can come to you. They have recently acquired a van which they have named Go Van Go and which is essentially a portable art studio. It is full of cubicles where art supplies are stored, and slots for tables and other such equipment. Weather permitting, Pastor-Price said, they can set up a temporary art studio anywhere.

But the Art Factory has much more going on than just their core of classes and camps. Last Friday, the 23rd, PastorPrice took me around the classroom building and the office building next door. The office building is full of the

M E T R O

By Rhonda Jones

pottery of Nellie Pierce who, when she retired from her pottery wheel, decided to donate a good bit of her equipment to the Art Factory. Pastor-Price said that, when Art Factory reps went to pick it up, they uncovered a treasure trove of dustladen receptacles. As a result, they held a reception for her on Nov. 20 and hosted an exhibit through Jan. 9.

Though the Art Factory has been around since the mid-1990s, Pastor-Price has been there only since 2000. She began as a work-study student from Augusta State University. Now she has a degree in theatre and has chosen to put that knowledge to work helping kids enrich their lives. “I am a success story,” she proclaimed proudly. She showed off the new pottery wheels, explaining that, not only are they stackable, but they weight only 20 pounds apiece and can be taken aboard the art van.

I asked her why she does what she does.

“Because it’s awesome. Because it’s people’s lives. I have seen so much,” she said, referring to the effects that getting a chance to make pottery, paint and learn drama and dance has on the kids who enroll in their programs.

“My biggest payment is the hugs from the kids,” she said. “They get an opportunity to do something they would never have the chance to do.”

She said that many of the kids who spend time at the Art Factory are kids that people tend to overlook. “They’re just diamonds in the rough,” she said.

And speaking of kids, she said, working at the Art Factory has not taken her away from her own kids, but has actually provided her a way to work while spending time with them, because they come over after school. As a result, her children are growing up under near-constant exposure to art.

Asked how many kids they see on a weekly basis, she said they teach 21 classes of 10 students each. “We saw 1,200 students last year and it’s going to be bigger this year.”

“We live in an artist’s Utopia,” she said about herself, her fellow teachers and the students who work with them. She said it’s the “energy and passion” that everyone brings to the job that helps them get things accomplished, since they are a nonprofit 501(c) program.

“We’re the A-Team,” Price said. “The real A-Team. We can do anything they did.” Mimicking herself, she said, “‘We need this: We have to figure out how to get it — for free.’”

If you would like more info about the Art Factory, visit their site at www.artfactoryinc.org or give them a call at (706) 731-0008.

S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

Photos courtesy of the Art Factory

The Art Factory blurs the line between “studio” and “playground.”

28 M E T R O S P I R I T

Arts: Visual

See Ex-GHIA Executive Director’s Art at GHIA

By Rhonda Jones

J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

S

ometimes an entertainment journalist is faced with the difficult situation of having a real, actual conversation with an artist whose work she just doesn’t get. Pretending to be into it would not get the job done. But of course, neither would p-ing off the artist in question, not to mention that that would just be mean. And then, horror upon horror, the journalist in question has to write about the experience honestly without p-ing off everyone in the universe and sounding like a complete dolt.

Fortunately, artist Anne Hebebrand, a former Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art executive director, was patient and gracious as a certain writer fumbled through some difficult questions about the paintings she is exhibiting that are essentially color fields. As many artists as I’ve talked to and as much abstract art as I’ve seen, it still just looks like squares to me. So I had to get pretty basic with the questions — like, what type of art is this?

“Well,” she said, “I would call it nonobjective painting, and most of them are of a vertical format and they deal with color and space.”

She said that she paints it in such a way that some of the colors seem to move forward, while others hang back.

She said that some of them trigger certain associations in the minds of her viewers. For instance, she said, some of her paintings remind people of sunsets or landscapes.

So I asked her why she didn’t just paint an actual sunset or landscape. (Yes, it actually seemed like an intelligent question before I actually uttered it.)

“It’s really the feeling or experience that you’re after,” she said. “You can discover different things in the painting.

They’re almost meditative.”

And the painting, she said, can actually work a little like a sunset. “A sunset can fulfill you emotionally when you watch it — it changes. The painting changes too.”

She said that one recent patron sent her an e-mail about the painting she’d bought, describing how different the piece looks at different times of the day, depending on the light.

And the pieces are not as simple as they may seem at first glance, she said. For one thing, one of her color fields may not necessarily be all one color. “If you look at it closely, it’s layers and layers of paint. It sometimes takes me days to paint them.”

I asked her if it was fun to create paintings devoid of actual subject matter.

“Yes, it’s very exciting,” she said.

“You’re working to make everything come together. And of course you’re

Not every piece of art has to have a subject. Check out Anne Hebebrand’s exhibit of non-objective paintings through March 12.

going to ask me when that is,” she said with a laugh. Her answer? The experience is too subjective to say hypothetically.

She said that her paintings express different moods depending not only on the colors she chooses, but on the variations in the tones.

“I think it was just sort of a process.

I’ve always worked — for the last 20 years — abstractly, non-objectively. My work used to have a lot of marks, a lot of movement. I decided, ‘This is too much; I can’t see it anymore. I need to do something different.”

So, she said, she simplified things. Her

current paintings, she said, appear almost to be details cut out of her old paintings and magnified.

As for why she changed, she said that it is important for the artist to be willing to make changes and experience growth.

Since she mentioned that she’d come from a family of artists, I asked if that exposure had given her a head start when it came to understanding and incorporating abstract technique. “I think I was probably exposed to abstract art early on as a child, but that’s not to negate that you need to learn how to draw.”

She says it’s a good idea to explore

beyond your own particular style as well.

“As an artist I think you have to look at everything. The more you’re exposed to, the better off you are as an artist. ... You have to look at art a lot, in all different forms, really.”

Now, let’s get back to the part about her being the ex-executive director of the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art. “I was the executive director while my husband went to medical school. It was a parttime position and it just sort of grew into a full-time position.”

Her duties included organizing and teaching classes and organizing exhibitions. “I hung the shows in the beginning and while I was here I just sort of started growing the organization.”

She was there from 1985 to 1988, she said. She finds herself with an exhibit at her old stomping ground because she was in town with her husband for his Medical College of Georgia class reunion. So while she was in town, she decided to submit some slides. And the exhibition committee liked them.

She said that she knew a lot of people in Augusta who were supportive of her work, and was looking forward to seeing them. And by the way, the last time she had an exhibit at the Gertrude Herbert was 16 years ago, and she was nine months pregnant. And it was this time of year as well.

“The last time when I had the exhibit here, we were snowed in. Everything was cancelled except the reception here at the Gertrude Herbert.”

I asked her what happens in the future.

“What does the future hold? Hopefully more painting,” she said.

I asked her what the experience of painting is like for her. “I would say it’s almost all-consuming. It’s ... how should I put it? You just get so involved in the act of painting, looking at your painting, actually getting excited about a few things you’ve done. You can really lose track of time. It’s a great feeling.

“And then other times, you paint things that don’t seem to work and you get very frustrated,” she said.

But she has at least 17 paintings that she does like, and those will be hanging at the Gertrude Herbert until March 12.

And yes, she said, they are all of this non-objective style. So find your sunsets where you may.

For information, visit the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art Web site at www.ghia.org or give them a call at (706) 722-5495 or (803) 278-7322.

29

Arts: Theatre

Annie Gets Her Gun and Her Man

By Rhonda Jones

P

roduction: “Annie Get Your Gun” with score by Irving Berlin

Company: Abbeville Opera House Synopsis: A lovesick tomboy named Annie (as if you couldn’t guess) is the star of Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show.

One of her favorite things is shootin’.

Her other favorite thing is Frank, who works for another wild west show. Only thing is, she’s not really good at getting boys to like her. But that doesn’t matter much, because he likes her anyway. But their romance has one major problem — their professional rivalry.

Interviewee: Abbeville Director Michael Genevie

Interesting coincidence: A theme of the piece is “The show must go on,” and that has been a theme in the lives of the cast as the ice in Abbeville with this week’s inclement weather has made rehearsing very difficult.

Cool interview blooper by Genevie: “This is the first time I have ever staged ‘There’s No Bus—’ … um, ‘Annie Get Your Gun’.” (See, it’s such a popular song that you want to re-name the play.)

Another reason to go see it: “It’s one of the largest casts — 40-plus people. It’s also one of the most spactactular visually. It’s just such a variety of locations — fairgrounds with exterior tents, to a cattle boat, to a hotel, to a ballroom, to Governor’s Island. We’re really able to

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J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

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“This show is just filled with hit songs that everybody recognizes.”

Beautiful French Farm Tables and Chairs, Painted Amour, Gilded Mirrors, Lamps

—— Abbeville Opera House Director Michael Genevie

History of the story: Ethel Merman played in this puppy on Broadway in the 1940s. So in a sense, Genevie is bringing a little bit of the 1940s to you.

Why you should go see it: It has a [heinie] of popular songs like “There’s No Business Like Show Business,” “Doing What Comes Naturally,” “I Got Lost in His Arms,” “You Can’t Get a Man With a Gun,” “Old-Fashioned Wedding” and “I Got the Sun in the Morning.”

What Genevie has to say about that: “Three songs were in the top ten while still playing on Broadway. Usually you’ll find one big hit song that comes out of a musical, but this show is just filled with hit songs that everybody recognizes.”

use the Operahouse stage beautifully for this show. It just lends itself to a drop show. We have beautifully painted backdrops with fences moved in from the wings.”

Genevie’s plot to lure you out: Period costumes, both of the time, and for the cowboy and Indian show.

Whens and wheres: At the Abbeville Opera House in Abbevile, S.C., Jan. 3031, Feb. 6-7, 13-14, 20-21 at 8 p.m.

Saturday matinees are at 3 p.m. on Jan. 31, Feb. 7, 14 and 21, but they’re all sold out. However, Genevie suggests that you call the Box Office Monday through Friday to check on cancellations. The number is (864) 366-2157.

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30 M E T R O S P I R I T

Cinema

“Win a Date With Tad Hamilton”

J A N 2 9

Along Came Polly (PG-13) — Ben Stiller has pungent moments of frenzy as insurance risk appraiser Reuben Fef fer, panicked in the powder room of Polly (Jennifer Aniston), desperate for some paper and reduced to using her favorite new toiletry utensil. But the script could use a few ex tra flushes. He wants to impress Polly, ace Village gal whom Aniston sustains with her special combo of daf fy-chick looseness and wisecracking sense. The movie is best when they're on-screen, fidgeting with romance. "Along Came Polly" has, by current standards of go-for-it mall comedy, regularity. You can laugh or wince or do both in sync, but you'd have to invoke the standards of a previous era to get genuinely of fended by it (to be deeply amused, you'd need no standards). Cast: Ben Stiller, Jennifer Aniston, Philip Seymour Hof fman, Alec Baldwin, Bryan Brown, Debra Messing, Hank Azaria.

Running time: 1 hr., 30 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ The Big Bounce (PG-13) — A drif ter wandering around Hawaii joins forces with a power ful local businessman and a criminal temptress to steal money from a wealthy real-estate developer. Cast: Owen Wilson, Morgan Freeman, Gary Sinise, Vinnie Jones, Charlie Sheen.

Big Fish (PG-13) — The center of this film is stolid William Bloom (Billy Crudup). Near the end of his father's long life, Bill is still peeved with the old boy for telling so many tall stories, for endlessly embroidering the truth with his drawlin' Dixie whoppers.

Beneficiaries of his motorized mouth include wife Sandy (Jessica Lange), and Jenny, the woman who wanted him, a pinin' lady of the pines (Helena Bonham Car ter). The movie isn't deep or risky enough to earn the catch in the throat it finally asks for. But it has the appeal of good times remembered, and cute, cranky

lines like, "Most things considered wicked are simply lonely, and lacking in social niceties." Cast: Alber t Finney, Ewan McGregor, Billy Crudup, Jessica Lange, Helena Bonham Car ter, Steve Buscemi. Running time: 1 hr., 50 mins. (Elliot) ★★1/2 Brother Bear (G) — Latest Disney animated of fering about a young man, Kenai, who is transformed by The Great Spirits into a bear. On a quest to gain back his human form, Kenai befriends a bear cub, Koda, and evades his human brother, who, not realizing Kenai has been turned into a bear, is on Kenai’s trail on a revenge mission.Cast: Jeremy Suarez, Joaquin Phoenix, Rick Moranis, Dave Thomas.

The Butterfly Effect (R) — As Evan Treborn, Ashton Kutcher is a floppy fishie with a hook in his mouth, and that hook is the script. Seems that Evan's dad is a deranged psycho with a "most unusual" brain disorder who, during the boy's visit to the ward, tries to throt tle and kill him. As Evan grows up, there are other lurid milestones. Evan has a break through: Reading his old diaries, the pages quiver and this lets him mentally travel back to a past he can now change.

In the middle, gulping like a caught bass, is Kutcher, aching with sincerity and technique you could call inadequate except that no technique would be adequate. The poor guy is caught, stuf fed and mounted.

Cast: Ashton Kutcher, Amy Smar t, Elden Henson, Kevin Schmidt, Eric Stoltz, William Lee Scot t. Running time: 1 hr., 53 mins. (Elliot t) ★ Calendar Girls (PG-13) — The story begins in tragedy: Annie's (Julie Walters) wise, gentle husband John (John Alder ton) contracts, then dies of, leukemia.

Wanting to do something, she determines to provide a decent sofa for the visitors to the hospital's sick and dying patients. What bet ter way than through the

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Movie Listings

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Women's Institute's annual calendar? How to boost sales? She and her naughty-girl girlfriend Chris (Helen Mirren) come up with a most improbable scheme, and enlist enough of their fellow 40- and 50-something W.I. members to make it happen. Mirren and Walters simply don't have enough story to work with; they seem almost to be flailing in their at tempt to gin up some drama from the flaccid script. Cast: Helen Mirren, Julie Walters, John Alder ton, Linda Basset t, Penelope Wilton. Running time: 1 hr., 48 mins. (Salm) ★★ The Cat in the Hat (PG) — This bulldozing movie has about as much to do with Dr. Seuss’ wit ty and impressively drawn kids' books as Adam Sandler has with Molière. It's a brash defilement of Geisel's most famous work, yet so compulsively cheery that people might try to ignore the obvious. Mike Myers plays the Cat in a big hat and costume of fake fur that stifles his amusing features. He's supposed to be the spirit of wild, impish fun, helping lif t the depressed scamp Conrad (pudgy, likable Spencer Breslin) and his

Columbia Pictures

“Big Fish”

RATINGS ★★★★ — Excellent

★★★— Worthy

★★ — Mixed

★ — Poor

control-freak sister, Sally (Dakota Fanning), a dwar fish total woman who star ts of f each day by making a list.

Director Bo Welch's technique is to just keep hurling (both senses of the word apply). His tireless approach is astoundingly tiresome. Cast: Mike Myers, Dakota Fanning, Alec Baldwin, Spencer Breslin, Kelly Preston.

Running time: 1 hr., 32 mins. (Elliot t) ★ Cheaper by the Dozen (PG) — To make an old (1950) Clif ton Webb comedy without Clif ton Webb is a serious loss, but get ting Steve Mar tin — a vanillashaked version of Webb's snappish fussiness — is not a bad idea for "Cheaper by the Dozen." He's engaging as Tom Baker, football coach and father of 12 kids.

Bonnie Hunt plays the wife and mom, Kate, looking awfully good despite the wear. The Bakers have a great life in a small town where Tom coaches, but he's hired to go to a bigger team outside Chicago, and the only story is the stress on the family from their move.

The film is simple and obvious and plastic, but diver ting. Designed to be fluf f, it's fluf fy all the time. Cast: Steve Mar tin, Bonnie Hunt, Piper Perabo, Hilary Duf f, Richard Jenkins. Running time: 1 hr., 34 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Cold Mountain (R) — Sick of the war, the wounded Confederate soldier Inman (Jude Law) trudges back home to Cold Mountain, N.C. Waiting for him, he hopes, is the woman he briefly knew, Ada (Nicole Kidman), the polished daughter of a preacher (Donald Sutherland). It's their unrequited love that draws Inman back, along with the land, and that keeps Ada going as she learns how to survive in the almost lawless country. Pushed along by old tunes that burr and rasp in the "O Brother, Where Ar t Thou?" mode, the movie has rhy thm, but it overall feels like just one darn hard day af ter another. Cast: Jude Law, Nicole Kidman, Renee Zellweger, Brendan Gleeson, Natalie Por tman, Philip Seymour Hof fman, Donald Sutherland, Giovanni Ribisi. Running time: 2 hrs., 21 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Elf (PG) — Years ago, a human boy was adopted by one of Santa’s elves af ter sneaking a ride back to the Nor th Pole in Santa’s bag of presents. Now he’s fully grown, his height and clumsy nature impeding his duties in the workshop. He decides it’s time to travel to the human world and search for his family. Taking a job as a depar tment store Elf, he inspires humans to believe in Santa Claus. Cast: Will Ferrell, James Caan, Zooey Deschanel, Bob Newhar t, Mary Steenburgen.

The Fighting Temptations (PG-13) — Cuba Gooding Jr. plays Darrin, a junior adver tising exec with secrets. He's nearly broke and he lied on his resume to get his job. Then the worst-case scenario happens:

0— Not worthy

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (PG-13) — lasts 200 minutes, and some of

those are long minutes. The last 20 can feel like an hour, for clearly creator Peter Jackson didn't wish to let his saga go. Bernard Hill, Viggo Mor tensen and Orlando Bloom are impressive fighters, and Cate Blanchet t makes a gorgeous Galadriel. This is posing, not acting. Sir Ian McKellen acts very well as noble Gandalf, but lines about hear t, courage and fate make him Lord For tune Cookie. "Lord" is all epic, all the time. Jackson loves bat tles, which means hurling dense masses of mostly computerized fighters at one another. If the clima x bat tle this time is more overpowering than the Helm's Deep boggler in "Two Towers," does it truly deepen the story? Maybe it is just more spectacle, as clima xes are stacked high and then the epic winds down with Elijah Woods as Frodo (now mildly matured) exiting sweetly, his destiny done.

Cast: Ian McKellen, Elijah Wood, Cate Blanchet t, Viggo Mor tensen, Ian Holm, Orlando Bloom, Sean Astin.

Running time: 3 hrs., 20 mins. ★★ Lost in Translation (R) — “Lost in Translation” follows two guests at a Tokyo hotel whose lives intertwine following a chance encounter at the hotel bar. The guests are Bob, a middle-aged actor in Tokyo to film whiskey commercials, and Charlot te, the young wife of a mostly absent photographer. Unable to sleep one night, the two head down to the bar for a drink, where they meet and forge a friendship based on their mutual loneliness and boredom. Cast: Bill Murray, Scarlet t Johansson, Giovanni Ribisi, Anna Faris, Fumihiro Hayashi, Yutaka Tadokoro. Running time: 1 hr., 42 mins.

Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (PG-13) — The best film yet about men

fighting at sea under sail. Two of Patrick O'Brian's books have been beautifully transposed into a cogent and moving tale of the Napoleonic Wars. Capt. Aubrey (Russell Crowe) and his friend Dr. Maturin (Paul Bet tany) bond tightly despite amusing frictions and lead through storm and shot a stout crew against a French ship larger and bet ter built. It all fits and works like good seamanship, under Peter Weir's direction, manly without fakery. Running time: 2 hrs., 19 mins.

(Elliot t) ★★★★ The Matrix: Revolutions (R) — So much expectation, so much budget and now ... this? Yep, a grinding bore with more solemn neo-religious talk about savior Neo (Keanu Reeves), contending worlds (equally ugly) and video game (oops, action) payof fs that cost hugely, but of fer trite satisfaction (hordes of metallic bugs, a leaping fist fight in the rain). Nobody really acts, though Mary Alice is cute as a cookie-baking oracle. Hugo Weaving as the evil, grinning Agent Smith still seems like an FBI man hysterical about losing J. Edgar Hoover. It's a banal epic, for diehard fans only. Running time: 2 hrs., 9 mins. (Elliot t) ★ Miracle (PG) — “Miracle” is based on the true story of the 1980 U.S. hockey team’s unlikely Olympic victory over the Russian team. The movie examines the win through the eyes of coach Herb Brooks. Cast: Kur t Russell, Eddie Cahill, Patricia Clarkson, Noah Emmerich, Michael Coristine.

The Missing (R) — Cate Blanchet t is again superb, as a flinty frontier mom who rides hard across 1870s New Mexico, chasing a mostly Apache band that took her daughter, slowly making up with her long absent and "gone Injun" father (Tommy Lee Jones).

Ron Howard directed with a true eye for detail and landscape, Eric Schweig is an alarmingly vicious sorcerer, the brutality is frequent and not for tender viewers. Running time: 2 hrs., 10 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ My Baby’s Daddy (PG-13) — A trio of par tying bachelors from the ‘hood must curb their wild ways when they discover all three of their girlfriends are pregnant at the same time. Cast: Eddie Grif fin, Anthony Anderson, Method Man, Bai Ling, Paula Jai Parker.

Mystic River (R) — Clint Eastwood (directing) and writer Brian Helgeland heap loads of emotional freight on a slow, solemn barge of plot. Its core is a police case (Kevin Bacon, Laurence Fishburne fine as the detectives) about a murder haunted by a past crime. Sean Penn does furious brooding and manly weeping as a dead girl's father, Tim Robbins is a haunted wreck as an abuse victim, Laura Linney and Marcia Gay Harden are sidelined. From its por tentous title to its Boston Irish pride parade, the film aches for greatness and achieves high TV drama; the case wrap-up is rushed and fishy. Running time: 2 hrs., 20 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Paycheck (PG-13) — Ben Af fleck is a computer genius who gets his memory wiped af ter a secret, three-year project, then finds himself cheated of the $92 million payof f from creepy CEO Aaron Eckhar t.

But Ben lef t behind a kit of clues, and he's put them together, despite the big memory lapse. He even got a state lot tery payof f for himself to compensate for the lost loot. And try to believe in Uma Thurman as tagalong Rachel, trying to inser t some emotions between the clacking wheels of plot. At times, you may believe the script's memory has been evaporated. If whole pages are gone or hurled together in a lot tery numbers bin, would we much notice, or care? Cast: Ben Af fleck, Uma Thurman, Aaron Eckhar t, Paul Giamat ti.

Running time: 1 hr. 50 min. (Elliot t) ★1/2 The Perfect Score (PG-13) — Six high school students, all with dif ferent reasons for wanting to ace

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“The Big Bounce”

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

Warner Bros . Pictures

His deception is discovered af ter he helps land a major account for the company. Then he learns that his Aunt Sally has passed away and he's expected to at tend her funeral as her last surviving relative. Darrin learns that he'll gain a huge inheritance if he whips the church choir into shape in time for a gospel contest. This is where "The Fighting Temptations" falls into the pit of stupidity. What saves the movie from being a total stinker is the music. As for Gooding, he seems to have confused charm and enthusiasm for acting. Cast: Cuba Gooding Jr., Beyonce Knowles, Mike Epps, Melba Moore, Angie Stone, The O'Jays, Montell Jordan and Rue McClanahan. Running time: 1 hr., 28 mins.

(McCormick) ★★ Honey (PG-13) — Like having the fluids drained out of your system and replaced by a sugar-loaded, mixed-drink concoction of a color not found in nature.

Honey Daniels (Jessica Alba) bar tends, dances and teaches hip-hop dance at a youth center. Discovered, she makes a fast splash as a music-video dancer and choreographer. There are jolts of energy from occasional moments of hip-hop frenzy, but the editing is so rapid-fire that what appears on the screen looks more like a video game than dance. Will Honey remember her old pals in the 'hood? Why, yes. First "Radio," now this; uplif t has never seemed so enervating. Running time: 1 hr., 28 mins. (Salm) ★1/2 The Last Samurai (R) — Tom Cruise stars as Nathan Algren, a heroic Civil War veteran and then embit tered cavalry man, reduced to heavy drinking and shilling for a gun company. Algren goes to Japan, paid to train the new imperial army in modern ways and weapons. But he finds himself drawn to the insurgent cause and almost idyllic life in the hills of samurai leader Katsumoto (Watanabe), who fights for the old ways and hopes to win over the adolescent emperor from greedy modernists. Having come to teach, Algren stays to learn. He is captured af ter impressing Katsumoto with his fighting spirit; the "barbarian" has a tiger within. "The Last Samurai" bides its time, has a predictable plot, but gives pleasure of a sustained kind.

Cast: Tom Cruise, Ken Watanabe, Tony Goldwyn, Timothy Spall, Koyuki. Running time: 2 hrs., 24 mins.

(Elliot t) ★★★

the S.A.T. exam, band together to steal the answer key.

Cast: Erika Christensen, Chris Evans, Bryan Greenberg, Scarlet t Johansson, Darius Miller.

Radio (PG) — Ed Harris is Harold Jones, the coach of the high school football team in a small South Carolina town. Coach Jones takes pity on James (Cuba Gooding Jr.), a mentally handicapped young man who mutely pushes his shopping car t past the practice field every day, and makes him a kind of team, then school mascot. Nicknamed Radio, he melts the hear t of almost everyone he encounters. A few antagonists enter and exit periodically. The schmaltzintolerant would be wise simply to Fed-Ex seven bucks and a vial of tears directly to Columbia Pictures. Cast: Cuba Gooding Jr. Ed Harris, Brent Sex ton, Riley Smith.

Running time: 1 hr., 46 mins. (Salm) ★1/2 Scary Movie 3 (PG-13) — The third film in the “Scary Movie” series once again spoofs a series of recent horror hits, fantasy epic films and other pop culture sensations, including “8 Mile,” “The Matrix,” “The Ring,” “The Others” and “Signs.” Cast: David Zucker, Anna Faris, Charlie Sheen, Regina Hall, Denise Richards.

Something’s Gotta Give (PG-13) — Jack Nicholson plays with his cruising wolf image and his age (66), spor ting with them as compulsive single Harry Langer. Harry's latest find for a fling is svelte Marin (Amanda Peet), an auctioneer who treats him like a lusty antique. They go to her divorced parents' beach house. But when` he meets mother Erica (Keaton), a playwright, the awkward moments quiver.

Harry has a sudden hear t crisis. He ends up stuck for a night with Erica. What happens is silly, knowing, wit ty, touching and abet ted def tly by a terrific score.

When someone says of Erica's new play, "It's sweet, it's smar t, it's funny," that serves as a review of the movie. Critics should be pleased to echo it. Cast: Jack Nicholson, Diane Keaton, Keanu Reeves, Frances McDormand, Amanda Peet. Running time: 1 hr., 47 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★★ The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (R) — It’s a remake of the original film and based loosely on true

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events that inspired that film and “The Silence of the Lambs.” A group of friends becomes isolated in the midst of a clan of cannibals. Cast: Jessica Biel, Jonathan Tucker, Eric Balfour, Erica Leerhsen.

Timeline (PG-13) — Using actual smoke and mirrors (yes, believe i t), time-trippers go through a " wormhole" to turbulent France, 1357. Big men, big swords, catapul ts firing flaming balls, a princess falling for a modern hunk, David Thewlis wearing an American accent like armor, Billy Connolly being Scot tish, Paul Walker looking ready to head home for sur fing, Richard Donner hacking away as director: fun for boys and aging fans of 1950s MGM. Running time: 1 hr., 45 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Torque (PG-13) — Biker Car y Ford returns to the hometown he lef t af ter taking several motorcycles belonging to a notorious drug dealer. The dealer is looking for his bikes, which contain a hidden stash in their gas tanks. When Ford refuses to give up the bikes, the dealer frames him for the murder of a rival gang leader. Now, Ford must outrun the drug dealer, a biker gang and the FBI. Cast: Mar tin Henderson, Monet Ma zur, Ice Cube, Jay Hernandez, Mat t Schulze.

Win a Date With Tad Hamilton (PG-13) — When a teenage girl wins a contest in which the

grand prize is a chance to date Holly wood’s most eligible bachelor, she finds herself in a love triangle wi th him and her best friend.

You Got Served (PG-13) — Elgin and David are best friends who are serious about their hobby: urban street dancing. When another town’s top group challenges them to a dancing competi tion, the boys must create new, cut ting-edge moves to stay in the game. Cast: Marques Houston, Omari Grandberr y, Jennifer Freeman, Jarrell Houston, Dreux Frederic.

—Capsules compiled from movie reviews writ ten by David Elliot t, film critic for The San Diego Union-Tribune and other staf f writers.

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Cinema: Review

“The Perfect Score” Is an Enjoyable, if Empty, Diversion

By Rachel Deahl

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hose little O’s. Those horrible questions about the arrival times of two trains leaving a station, one going south and one going north. Anyone who’s ever endured the horror of the SAT knows how those three letters can inspire fear in the heart of any teenager. And although “The Perfect Score” doesn’t tell us anything new about the most infamous standardized test — the way it’s racially, socio-economically and gender biased — it’s an enjoyable, if empty, diversion.

When Kyle (Chris Evans) gets his underwhelming SAT scores back, it appears that his lifelong dream of attending Cornell to study architecture is never going to become a reality. Of course Kyle isn’t the only one whose life is being pushed off course by the exam. His best friend Matty (Bryan Greenberg) just found out that his scores aren’t high enough to get him admitted to Maryland, where his girlfriend is currently attending. So, with one friend seeing his future in danger and another seeing his relationship in jeopardy, a scheme is hatched to get back at the corporate structure that makes the exam, ETS. Of course when Kyle and Matty show up to file a complaint at ETS headquarters and are summarily turned away, another plan is hatched — to steal the test. In order to lift the exam though, they need access, and who better to offer it than Francesca (Scarlett Johanson), a punked out classmate whose dad happens to work for ETS. After minimal coaxing Francesca, who’s seemingly indifferent to everything but her father’s unfortunate penchant for young women, agrees to help the boys lift the test. But, as the plans are discussed, a few more classmates get wind of the plans.

Roy (Leonardo Nam), a goofy stoner, overhears Kyle and Matty discussing their scheme in the high school bathroom and comes aboard. And Kyle leaks word

about his plans to Anna (Erika Christensen), the class goody-two-shoes, who then tells Desmond (Darius Miles), the NBA hopeful. Spurred on by a variety of motives — romance, ambition, revenge and boredom — the six kids hatch an amateur break-in to steal the test from ETS headquarters the night before they’re scheduled to take the exam. Of course, when they go in with their flashlights and rope, what they discover is each other … and the valuable lesson that life is more important, and bigger, than a score on any test.

Making nods to everything from “The Matrix” to “Heat,” “The Perfect Score” tries to come closer to a film that Johanson’s character references early on, “The Breakfast Club.” When the six kids get together to discuss their game plan, Johanson’s Francesca says that each thief should explain why they want to steal the test and bond like they do in “The Breakfast Club,” over a joint.

Ultimately, “The Perfect Score” doesn’t offer nearly as much insight into the tortured realities of adolescence as the ‘80s film it invokes. Although it offers some apropos, if blunt, observations along the way — “The SAT isn’t about who you are; it’s about who you’ll be” — the characters are more transparent and onedimensional than the ones who shared a fated day of detention at that suburban Chicago high school. As each kid finds their particular salvation (whether it’s freedom, a new girlfriend or a parent figure) over the extended length of their unprofessional burglary, the lessons are a little too easily learned and the problems too quickly solved. But with its cute and somewhat able cast (Scarlet Johanson raises the bar among her homogenous co-stars), “The Perfect Score” is amenable, enjoyable and as quickly forgotten as all those tricks you learned in your SAT prep class.

Cinema: Review

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Kutcher, Cast Stranded in “The Butterfly Effect”

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diaries, the pages quiver (letters literally separate and rise up wobbling), and this lets him mentally travel back to a past he can now change.

H.G. Wells never quite fathomed it this way, but then, nobody has. Even Wells did not envision that by shifting from flat, dull images that look like cheap ‘60s TV shows into flashbacks colored like an MTV update of hippie psychedelics, you could achieve, well, this silly mess.

Evan, in making his tortured past better, rebounds to a changed present that briefly leaves him without arms (more fish imagery comes to mind). And this leads Evan to a great moment in the modern crusade against smoking: “If I hadn’t blown off my arms, my mom would never have started smoking.”

Other marvels include the news that a character “got straight A’s without ever touching a book,” which opens a new vista of brilliant illiteracy. In prison, surrounded by rape-minded cons, Evan pledges himself to a racist gang and also brings forth stigmata on his hands, invoking Christ.

What, really, were the imaginative Bress and Gruber imagining? What they made is generic thrill drivel, for a multiplex drive-in. Amy Smart is too smart for this pulp spew, Stoltz looks utterly wrecked and rising actor Elden Henson (so good in “The Battle of Shaker Heights”) is miserable as a fat kid driven to viciousness.

In the middle, gulping like a caught bass, is Kutcher, aching with sincerity and technique you could call inadequate except that no technique would be adequate. The poor guy is caught, stuffed and mounted.

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N

By David Elliott

n “The Butterfly Effect,” the bearded Ashton Kutcher has a scene when he stares in wet panic from a bathtub, and he looks like Che Guevara as a stunned big-mouth bass.

It’s an indelible moment, but then the whole movie is a stain, or a blot or just an absurd mistake. The writer-directors, J. Mackye Gruber and Eric Bress, fresh from their road kill called “Final Destination 2,” have used media hottie Kutcher as both star and chief victim (the most infamous example was Pia Zadora in “Butterfly,” which may have a genetic connection to this film).

As Evan Treborn, Kutcher is a floppy fishie with a hook in his mouth, and that hook is the script. Seems that Evan’s dad is a deranged psycho with a “most unusual” brain disorder who, during the boy’s visit to the ward, tries to throttle and kill him. Evan’s gentle mom is rattled by this salty day at the nut farm.

As Evan grows up, there are other lurid milestones: Evan watching his dog in a sack, about to be set on fire by a vile bully; Evan and pals, on a macho dare, planting a stick of explosives in a mailbox that blows up a woman and her baby; Evan and friend Kayleigh (Amy Smart when grown) made to strip for porn shots by her perverse papa (Eric Stoltz, guttering a once promising career).

No sooner are we mulling such critical responses as “jeez,” “huh?” and “duh,” than Evan has become the full, bearded glory of Kutcher, the young titan of the tabs. He’s rather mixed-up, of course, and his therapist is bewildered, but Evan has a breakthrough: Reading his old

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MOVIE CLOCK Regal Augusta Exchange 20 Movies Good 1/30 - 2/5 The Big Bounce (PG-13) 1:05, 3:15, 5:40, 8:00, 10:35 Lost in Translation (R) Fri-Sat: 1:25, 3:50, 7:00, 9:25, 11:50; Sun-Thurs: 1:25, 3:50, 7:00, 9:25 The Perfect Score (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:35, 2:50, 5:10, 7:30, 9:50, 12:10; Sun-Thur: 12:35, 2:50, 5:10, 7:30, 9:50 You Got Served (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:40, 2:00, 2:55, 4:30, 5:25, 7:25, 7:55, 9:45, 10:15, 12:05, 12:35; Sun-Thurs: 12:40, 2:00, 2:55, 4:30, 5:25, 7:25, 7:55, 9:45, 10:15 Miracle (PG) Sat: 7:30 Cheaper by the Dozen (PG) Fri-Sat: 11:50, 2:05, 4:25, 6:50, 9:15, 11:40; SunThur: 11:50, 2:05, 4:25, 6:50, 9:15 Master and Commander (PG-13) 1:20, 4:20, 7:20, 10:20 The Butterfly Effect (R) Fri-Sat: 12:00, 1:30, 2:35, 4:15, 5:10, 7:15, 7:45, 9:50, 10:20, 12:25; Sun-Thur: 12:00, 1:30, 2:35, 4:15, 5:10, 7:15, 7:45, 9:50, 10:20 Mystic River (R) 12:55, 3:55, 7:05, 10:10 Along Came Polly (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:45, 3:00, 5:15, 7:40, 9:55, 12:15; Sun-Thur: 12:45, 3:00, 5:15, 7:40, 9:55 Torque (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:15, 3:20, 5:25, 8:15, 10:30, 12:30; Sun-Thur: 1:15, 3:20, 5:25, 8:15, 10:30 Win a Date With Tad Hamilton (PG-13) 12:30, 3:05, 5:30, 7:50, 10:45 Big Fish (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:00, 4:05, 6:55, 9:45, 12:35; Sun-Thur: 1:00, 4:05, 6:55, 9:45 Calendar Girls (PG-13) Fri: 2:15, 4:50, 7:30, 10:05, 12:40; Sat: 2:15, 4:50, 12:40; Sun-Thur: 2:15, 4:50, 7:30, 10:05 My Baby’s Daddy (PG-13) 1:10, 3:20, 5:35, 8:10, 10:40 Cold Mountain (R) 12:05, 3:25, 6:45, 10:05 Paycheck (PG-13) 4:10, 10:25 Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (PG-13) 11:55, 4:00, 8:05 Something’s Gotta Give (PG-13) 1:45, 4:35, 7:35, 10:30 The Last Samurai (R) 12:50, 7:10 Evans 14 Cinemas Movies Good 1/30 - 2/5 The Perfect Score (PG-13) Fri: 3:40, 5:45, 7:50, 9:55; Sat-Sun: 1:30, 3:40, 5:45, 7:50, 9:55; Mon-Thur: 5:45, 7:50, 9:55 The Big Bounce (PG-13) Fri: 3:10, 5:10, 7:10, 9:10; Sat-Sun: 1:10, 3:10, 5:10, 7:10, 9:10; Mon-Thur: 5:10, 7:10, 9:10 You Got Served (PG-13) Fri: 3:35, 5:35, 7:35, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:35, 3:35, 5:35, 7:35, 9:35; Mon-Thur: 5:35, 7:35, 9:35 Master and Commander (PG-13) FriSun: 2:00, 5:00, 8:00; Mon-Thur: 5:00, 8:00 The Butterfly Effect (R) Fri-Sun: 2:20, 4:40, 7:00, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 4:40, 7:00, 9:25 Mystic River (R) Fri: 3:45, 6:45, 9:30; Sat-Sun: 12:55, 3:45, 6:45, 9:30; Mon-

Thur: 3:55, 6:45, 9:30 Win a Date With Tad Hamilton (PG-13) Fri: 2:50, 4:50, 7:20, 9:50; Sat-Sun: 12:45, 2:50, 4:50, 7:20, 9:50; Mon-Thur: 4:50, 7:20, 9:50 Torque (PG-13) Fri-Sun: 3:25, 7:25; MonThur: 7:25 Along Came Polly (PG-13) Fri: 3:20, 5:30, 7:40, 9:50; Sat-Sun: 1:05, 3:20, 5:30, 7:40, 9:50; Mon-Thur: 5:30, 7:40, 9:50 Big Fish (PG-13) Fri: 3:55, 7:05, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 3:55, 7:05, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 3:55, 7:05, 9:45 My Baby’s Daddy (PG-13) Fri: 5:25, 9:20; Sat-Sun: 1:25, 5:25, 9:20; Mon-Thur: 5:25, 9:20 Cheaper by the Dozen (PG) Fri: 3:00, 5:20, 7:30, 9:40; Sat-Sun: 12:50, 3:00, 5:20, 7:30, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 5:20, 7:30, 9:40 Cold Mountain (R) Fri-Sun: 1:50, 5:40, 9:00; Mon-Thur: 5:40, 9:00 Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (PG-13) Fri: 4:30, 8:30; Sat-Sun: 12:45, 4:30, 8:30; Mon-Thur: 4:30, 8:30 Something’s Gotta Give (PG-13) Fri: 4:20, 6:55, 9:40; Sat-Sun: 1:20, 4:20, 6:55, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 4:20, 6:55, 9:40 Masters 7 cinemas Movies Good 1/30 – 2/5 The Missing (R) Fri: 4:00, 6:55, 9:25; SatSun: 1:00, 4:00, 6:55, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 4:00, 6:55, 9:25 Elf (PG) Fri: 5:10, 7:15, 9:40; Sat-Sun: 12:55, 3:05, 5:10, 7:15, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 5:10, 7:15, 9:40 Radio (PG) Fri: 4:45, 7:05, 9:30; Sat-Sun: 1:30, 4:45, 7:05, 9:30; Mon-Thur: 4:45, 7:05, 9:30 Scary Movie 3 (PG-13) Fri: 5:15, 7:25, 9:50; Sat-Sun: 1:15, 3:15, 5:15, 7:25, 9:50; Mon-Thur: 5:15, 7:25, 9:50 Brother Bear (G) Fri: 5:00, 7:00; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 3:00, 5:00, 7:00; Mon-Thur: 5:00, 7:00 Texas Chainsaw Massacre (R) Fri: 4:30, 7:30, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 2:00, 4:30, 7:30, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 4:30, 7:30, 9:45 Timeline (PG-13) Fri: 4:15, 7:10, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:45, 4:15, 7:10, 9:35; Mon-Thur: 4:15, 7:10, 9:35 Matrix: Revolutions (R) 9:00 Regal 12 Cinemas Movies Good 1/30 - 2/5 The Missing (R) 1:55, 4:45, 7:45 Honey (PG-13) 2:25, 4:45, 7:25, 9:50 Cat in the Hat (PG) 2:10, 4:25, 7:00, 9:25 Timeline (PG-13) 2:15, 4:40, 7:15, 9:40 Texas Chainsaw Massacre (R) 2:00, 5:00, 7:30, 9:55 Matrix: Revolutions (R) 2:20, 5:10, 7:50 Elf (PG) 2:30, 4:50, 7:35, 9:55 Scary Movie 3 (PG-13) 2:45, 4:55, 7:40, 9:45 Radio (PG) 2:05, 4:30, 7:00, 9:30 Brother Bear (G) 2:35, 4:35, 7:10, 9:15 The Fighting Temptations (PG-13) 1:55, 4:30, 7:05, 9:40

Movie listings are subject to change without notice.

Music

35 M E T R O S P I R I T

Combination of Factors Contribute to Pizza Joint’s Success

By Lisa Jordan

J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

Photos by Joe

White

O

wner Michael Schepis attributes the success of downtown’s Pizza Joint to a few factors.

“It’s a combination of food, atmosphere and just a lot of hard work,” he says. “And some luck thrown in as well.”

The Pizza Joint has been a fixture on Broad Street since 1997.

Four years ago, it relocated up the street to a larger building, in conjunction with its growing number of patrons.

“We needed more space, a larger kitchen,” says Schepis. “We wanted to offer the clientele more seating in a better environment.

We wanted to add some more food to the menu, as well.”

The Pizza Joint is one of those comfortable spots where you can grab a booth and order up a generous slice of pizza topped with whatever you can conceive of — even if it’s late at night. On weeknights, the Pizza Joint is open until midnight. On weekends, closing time is 2 a.m. In the summer, weeknight hours will extend to 1 a.m.

“We try and give you your money’s worth,” says Schepis. “That was the whole philosophy, trying to give you what you pay for, if not more. … We serve food all night. Up until close, you can get anything you want. If you want some crazy combination of toppings, we’ll make it.”

Revitalizing Augusta’s downtown area is something Schepis seems to be passionate about.

“When we came down, it was sort of like fresh blood coming down and investing some money and getting the younger people to come downtown,” he explains. “Coco from the Soul Bar, who initially opened up down here, he was a positive influence to a lot of people. And then Matt and Barry from Nacho Mama’s came down. I think they sort of spearheaded some of the current growth that’s down here now. There were also several existing businesses downtown.

“I just wanted to own my own business. I thought it would be a hot business for downtown Augusta. I thought it had some potential. … Primarily the reason for opening is I thought downtown was going to undergo a renaissance. I felt that with some of the businesses that were already down here and obviously the aesthetic value of downtown and the ease of being able to walk from one place to another. You can walk from various stores and enjoy yourself with the scenery and what not. Unfortunately, there’s not the (retail) business down here that there once was. Obviously, there’s been an influx of little restaurants and cafes.”

In its expanded location, the Pizza Joint offers up an oversized courtyard in front, perfect for hosting the restaurant’s musical offerings.

“That was important, outdoor seating,” says Schepis. “Generally, when the weather’s nice, we have (musicians) perform outside, since we have a patio and a deck. We use local musicians, just acoustic, small, intimate-type productions.”

36 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

Music: CD Reviews SUPER BOWL PARTY PLATTERS AND BRATWURST PLATTERS FRESH HOMEMADE BRATWURSTS, LUNCH MEATS AND HAMS FIVE DELICIOUS TYPES OF BRATWURSTS MADE IN AUGUSTA ALL MEAT: NO FILLERS

“Chipped Front Tooth” Wavers; “Talkie Walkie” Disappoints

By Lisa Jordan and Andy Stokes

In the Augusta Business CenterJust Off Washington Road Behind Applebee’s 868-0830 Tues.-Fri. 10 - 5:30 • Saturday 10 - 3:30

Scott Holt Band — “Chipped Front Tooth” (Gracetone)

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In the liner notes for Scott Holt Band’s “Chipped Front Tooth,” Holt explains that the album was recorded in one take, on a day off in the midst of a Southeastern U.S. tour. The reason, he says, was his determination to make a record that’s as honest as possible. The end result, however, is a record that, while undoubtedly full of heart, seems ultimately confused as to which direction it needs to take.

Half of the 10 tracks that make up “Chipped Front Tooth” are Scott Holt originals, penned with writing partner Richard Fleming. The other half contains covers that pay homage to Howlin’ Wolf, Willie Mabon, Sugar Pie Desanto, Bobby Bland and Dave Bartholomew. For the most part, Holt does justice to the material he covers.

“Rockin’ Daddy” is an energetic start to the album, with a blazing guitar solo, jazzy piano and plenty of attitude. The slow, smokey, “You’d Be a Millionaire” transports listeners to the darkened interior of a retro blues lounge.

It’s on Holt’s own compositions that his duality begins to show. On one hand, there’s the dark, Jimi Hendrix-influenced “Tick,” which showcases Holt’s instrumental prowess and husky vocals. But on the two ballads on the album, “One Day Away” and “If I Could,” Holt forgoes the character induced by a deeper vocal delivery in favor of lighter, Bon Jovi-esque vocals that aren’t in keeping with the rest of the album.

— L.J. Air — “Talkie Walkie” (Astralwerks) Air came to prominence in 1998 after releasing “Moon Safari,” a perfectly titled, completely original space odyssey that got more use out of the Moog synthesizer than

a week’s worth of grocery store Muzak.

For all purposes, “Moon Safari” invented an entirely new sub-genre of music, spawned a thousand imitators and started that whole “chill out” movement. “Moon Safari” got everyone’s attention, from corporate advertising firms to Beck, who remixed a cut from the album.

Two years later came a surprisingly mature next move for the young duo: scoring a film, Sofia Coppola’s brilliant directorial debut, “The Virgin Suicides.” A risky venture, but Air’s score did far more than accompany the film; it completed it.

It seemed that the French band could do no wrong. Then came 2001’s painfully forgettable “10,000 Hz Legend.” Air took a huge chance that they might renounce their throne as down-tempo disco kings with this post-modern take on a 1960s look at the year 2010, and they lost big. This raises the question: With “Talkie Walkie,” have the boys learned their lesson, proving they were only taking a field trip from the pseudo-Bacharach sound that originally gained them fame, or are they still plugging away at the frequencies that alienated most of their original fan base?

Sadly, the latter is the case. The album sleeve itself, covered in algebraic equations, serves a stern warning of the frustrations that lie within. Air produces 10 tracks of music that would’ve perfectly scored a love scene in “Tron.” But that’s just it: “Tron” had no love scene. So the same lyrics that once complemented the Rembrandt of perfectly dated melodies are now found embarrassingly naked on a blank canvas, bereft of any catchy hooks.

Those looking for a follow-up to Air’s first two releases need to look further than “Talkie Walkie,” as its creators have handed down the scepter to the younger generation of artists they originally inspired.

— A.S.

37

In The Spirit

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

Travis Wiley, Walker Madden, Allyson Oller, Ashlee Coleman and Chad Capitosti at a bull riding event at the Civic Center.

Jennie Gibbs and Jeremy Pickens at Metro Coffeehouse.

David Elrod, Missy Lawer, Hope Cochran and J.J. Barrow at Cue and Brew.

Joe Collins, Janet Collins, Tiffany Smith and Rob Smith at Red Carpet Events.

J.D. Usry, Ashley Bourne, Hannah Flichum and Chris Robin at Limelite Café.

Mary Beth Brookshire, Caleb Belcher, Samantha Rowley and Adam Kelly at Robbie’s Sports Pub.

Jermaine Norris and Latoya Smalls at Robbie’s Sports Pub.

Joseph Micheu, Michelle Prope and Kyle Michea at Limelite Café.

Photos by Michael E. Johnson

M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

MUSIC MINIS Jethro Tull Keyboardist Turns Over a New Leaf And in a really, really big way.

Former Tull keyboardist David Palmer has taken the ultimate step and gone under the knife to become Dee Palmer.

Trading beard for makeup and sporting long, blonde tresses, she is now set to embark on a solo career at the age of 66 and wishes to be judged solely by the quality of her music. Though her desire to become a woman was known in the music business for years, according to sources, she held back until the death of the wife. Palmer is reported to have broken the news to former Tull bandmate Ian Anderson by ringing him up to tell him, “There’s something I need to get off my increasingly ample chest.”

Rockers Aren’t Naïve Little Kids Anymore Actually, in this day and age, when rock ‘n’ roll itself is eligible to collect retirement, the boys ‘n’ girls in the biz are savvy businesspeople. And they’re taking steps to ensure the recording industry doesn’t get one over on them in the realm of digital music. Peter Gabriel and Brian Eno have started a musicians’ alliance that is for letting artists sell their work online instead of relying on record labels. They have a manifesto, and they call their organization “Magnificent Union of Digitally Downloading Artists” (MUDDA).

According to online sources, that would actually give artists a great deal of freedom, allowing them to do all kinds of interesting things like release several versions of a song and allow fans to vote on which they like best or releasing a minute of music every day for a set time.

COMPILED BY RHONDA JONES Information compiled from online and other music news sources.

Fri & Sat Playback the Band featuring Tutu D’Vyne Tues Jam Session w/ Pat Blanchard & Friends Wed Pat Blanchard

Surrey Tavern 471 Highland Ave. | 736-1221 Open Mon-Sat at 4 pm until

MUSIC

BY TURNER

O

ne of the hottest rumors in the music biz is the news that BEYONCE, MISSY ELLIOTT and ALICIA KEYS will tour the U.S. this year. Alicia alone would be a hot ticket, but as a trio this would be one of those few “sure things” that promoters everywhere dream about. No dates or venues have been announced, but we’ll keep you posted.

La-La Land Dept.

I just returned from California where I attended one of the craziest, most surreal conventions in the world. The National Association of Music Merchants holds their yearly meeting in Anaheim, where every credible musical instrument company shows their new products. The coolest part of the four-day event is that most product endorsees visit their respective manufacturer’s booths to meet and greet the dealers that sell their products. Some of the musicians that attended and performed included MARK KNOPFLER, JERRY CANTRELL, GREG BISSONETTE, WAR’s harmonica great LEE OSKAR, BTO and former STEELY DAN drummer (and jazz great) PETER ERSKINE. It was sweet sensory overload at its finest.

At the convention I was fortunate to have a lengthy conversation with one of the finest rock drummers on the planet. KENNY ARONOFF has long been known as JOHN MELLENCAMP’s main percussion guy, but many fans also recognize him from stints with THE SMASHING PUMPKINS and JOHN FOGERTY. Kenny and I had a good laugh together when I reminded him of Fogerty’s appearance on DAVID LETTERMAN in the late ‘90s. After a blistering medley of CCR hits that had Aronoff virtually attacking his kit and almost overshadowing Fogerty’s gritty performance, Letterman came out as he usually does to say hello to and thank the band. Letterman said to Fogerty “That was really great, John, but you really need to do something about that drummer,” breaking up the band and audience alike. Aronoff is a real class act and deserves every bit of the success that’s he’s earned.

The Lion Sleeps Tonight AGAIN Dept.

It was almost as sad as seeing Duke’s Restaurant close. The Red Lion Nightclub is dark and silent yet again as the once-great nightclub has called it quits. A “For Lease” sign adorns the front of the club which has gone through countless changes in formats over the past few decades. Old-timers might remember when the Red Lion was known as one of Augusta’s finest dining establishments way back in the 1950s and ‘60s. There’s no news yet if the club will open again.

It’s hard to believe that this week marks the first anniversary of the Space Shuttle Columbia tragedy that claimed the lives of all seven crew members. Former Augustan STEVE MORSE, currently the lead guitarist in DEEP PURPLE, was so moved by the explosion that

BY

Kenny Aronoff and Ed Turner he penned a short but hauntingly beautiful instrumental “Contact Lost” that can be found on Purple’s latest outing “Bananas.” One of the astronauts, KALPANA CHAWLA, was a good friend of Deep Purple who, just days before the disaster had just treated his fellow colleagues in space to the classic Purple tunes “Aviator” and, of course, “Space Truckin.” It’s easily one of Morse’s most beautiful compositions ever.

Late last year, The Rock ‘N’ Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2004 class of inductees. ZZ TOP, BOB SEGER, TRAFFIC, PRINCE, THE DELLS and GEORGE HARRISON (as a solo artist) will enter the hallowed hall on March 15. All are worthy inductees, but one other new member seems a bit out of place. No one can debate the fact that JACKSON BROWNE was a major player in the “sensitive Cali singer-songwriter” movement of the ‘70s. Sure, his albums “Saturate Before Using” and “Running On Empty” are classics, and the fact that Browne co-wrote the EAGLES smash “Take It Easy” should not be overlooked. However, his weak ‘80s and ‘90s material didn’t move many and his inclusion to this year’s class seems to be a bit of a stretch.

THE MOODY BLUES, passed over yet again by the hall, are conspicuous by their absence.

Turner’s Quick Notes JOHN LENNON’s hand-written lyrics to the “Abbey Road” tune “Because” recently fetched an amazing $67,000 at a recent auction in New York … The new CURE box set “Join the Dots” is in the stores this week … STP-VELVET REVOLVER vocalist SCOTT WEILAND is in rehab yet again … 311 is considering several Southern tour dates this March … PUDDLE OF MUDD invade the Roxy in Atlanta Feb. 2 …

Guitar wiz LARRY CARLTON has reissued his white-hot “Sapphire Blue” album …

STEROLAB’s “Margarine Eclipse” is out now …

Grammy Award winner LUCINDA WILLIAMS visits Athens’ Georgia Theater March 5 …

Gee, what will he tell his grandchildren? ART GARFUNKEL was charged and fined $100 for marijuana possession in New York last week.

Turner’s Rock ‘N’ Roll Jeopardy A. This Brazilian percussionist was the only musician to be a member of Return to Forever and Weather Report.

Q. Who is Airto Moreira?

38

ED TURNER

Night Life

39 M E T R O S P I R I T J A N 2 9 2 0 0 4

Experience the Roots-A-Fire reggae band Jan. 31 at the Soul Bar.

Thursday, 29th The Bee’s Knees - Meditate on This!

Cafe Du Teau - James McIntyre Club Argos - Karaoke Dance Par ty with DJ BJ Continuum - Playa*Listic Thursday Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s - The Section Finish Line Cafe - DJ Fox’s Lair - Jason and Chuck Greene Streets - Karaoke The Helm - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - John Last Call - DJ Richie Rich Locals - Preston and Weston Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - The Comedy Zone with Mark and Collin, DJ Casey Playground - Open Mic The Pourhouse - National Karaoke Competition Finals Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Rusty Shannon’s - Karaoke with Peggy Wheeler Tavern - DJ Dog

Friday, 30th Andy’s -Saxman Randy Brooks, Doris Allen, R&R Back Roads - DJ The Bee’s Knees - Projections and Selections

Blind Pig - Debbie Davies, Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips Cafe Du Teau - James McIntyre Charlie O’s - Live Band Club Argos - Spectral Erosa with DJ Triskyl and Claire Storm Coconuts - Bikini Contest Coliseum - Charlie Brown Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - South of Sane, Deleveled D. Timm’s - The Section Eagle’s Nest - Karaoke with DJ MJ El Rodeo - Grupo Arcnis de Control Finish Line Cafe - DJ Fox’s Lair - Edmond Kida Greene Streets - Karaoke Hangnail Gallery - A Vanity Crowd, Eve Gray, Evermind, Still Life Projector Honk y Tonk - DJ Doug Romanella Jeremy’s Nightclub - Spoken Word, Open Mic, Dance Par ty with DJ Dick Joe’s Underground - Red-Headed Stepchild Little Honk y Tonk - Live Enter tainment Marlboro Station - Dana Anderson, Dance Par ty with DJ Mark Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Deeper with DJ Jason Wilson Ms. Carolyn’s - The Horizon Partridge Inn - Kari Gaf fney, Jef f Williams Playground - Barroom Olympics The Pourhouse - Tony Howard Band

Debbie Davies comes to the Blind Pig Jan. 30.

Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Rusty The Shack - DJ Chip Shannon’s - Bar t Bell, Allen Black Soul Bar - Disco Hell Stillwater Tap Room - Rev. Jef f Mosier’s Ear Reverents Surrey Tavern - Playback with Tutu D’Vyne Wheeler Tavern - DJ Dog

Saturday, 31st Andy’s - Randy Carver Jr. and Band Back Roads - DJ The Bee’s Knees - Jazz Sessions with Moniker The Break Room - Karaoke with Rob Cafe Du Teau - James McIntyre Charlie O’s - Live Band Club Argos - Argos Angels Sasha, Diane Chanel, Stephanie Ross Coconuts - DJ Tim Coliseum - Petite Dee JonVille Cotton Patch - John Kolbeck Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - Lokal Loudness Choice Awards D. Timm’s - The Section El Rodeo - Karaoke with Tracy Finish Line Cafe - DJ, Karaoke Fox’s Lair - Livingroom Legends Greene Streets - Karaoke Honk y Tonk - DJ Doug Romanella, Sexy Legs Contest

Jeremy’s Nightclub - Open Mic Joe’s Underground - Black-Eyed Susan Last Call - DJ Richie Rich Little Honk y Tonk - Buster Hymen Band Locals - Blind Draw Marlboro Station - Lauren Alexander, Dance Par ty with DJ Mark Metro Coffeehouse - Live Af ternoon Bluegrass with Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Secret Society with DJ Kenny Ray Partridge Inn - Sandy B. and the All-Stars Playground - Barroom Olympics The Pourhouse - Tony Howard Band Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Rusty The Shack - DJ Buckwheat Shannon’s - Kool Katz Soul Bar - Roots-A-Fire Reggae Band Stillwater Tap Room - Tara Scheyer and the Half-Shir t Leroys Surrey Tavern - Playback with Tutu D’Vyne Wheeler Tavern - DJ Dog

Sunday, 1st Adams Lounge - Super Bowl Tailgate Par ty The Break Room - Super Bowl Par ty Cafe Du Teau - The Last Bohemian Quar tet Marlboro Station - Claire Storm, Dance Par ty with DJ Jon Jon

continued on page 40

Tuesday, 3rd Adams Lounge - Keith “Fossill” Gregory The Bee’s Knees - 12*Tone Lounge Coliseum - Tournament Tuesday Crossroads - Meltdown 2004 CD Release Par ty D. Timm’s - The Section Fox’s Lair - Open Mic Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Metro Coffeehouse - Irish Night with Sibin Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Surrey Tavern - Tuesday Night Jam Session with Pat Blanchard and Friends

Wednesday, 4th The Bee’s Knees - Heliocentric Cinema Club Argos - Dance Par ty with DJ BJ Coconuts - Karaoke Coliseum - Wacky Wednesdays Continuum - Open Mic Jam Sessions Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band

Mercy Me, Amy Grant, Bebo Norman - Bell Auditorium - Feb. 7 Hope for Agoldensummer - Soul Bar - Feb. 7 Down to the Shake, L.E.A. - Crossroads - Feb. 7 The Slackers - Hangnail Gallery - Feb. 11 The ‘80s Strike Back - Club Argos - Feb. 13 Honestly - Crossroads - Feb. 18 Ghoultown - Hangnail Gallery - Feb. 19 Sean Costello - Blind Pig - Feb. 20 Willie Nelson - Augusta-Richmond County Civic Center - Feb. 28 The Woggles - Soul Bar - Feb. 28 Anthony Gomes - Blind Pig - March 6

Elsewhere Ronnie Milsap - Macon City Auditorium, Macon, Ga. - Jan. 30 Pink Floyd Laser Spectacular - Fox Theatre, Atlanta - Jan. 30 Taj Mahal - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Jan. 30 Left Front Tire - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - Jan. 30 moe. - Fox Theatre, Atlanta - Jan. 31 Puddle of Mudd - Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - Feb. 2 Vonda Shepard - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Feb. 6

Kid Rock - The Arena at Gwinnet t Center, Duluth, Ga. - Feb. 7 Mushroomhead - Masquerade, Atlanta - Feb. 9 Rod Stewart - Philips Arena, Atlanta - Feb. 10 Dillinger Escape Plan - Masquerade, Atlanta - Feb. 11 Yonder Mountain String Band - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Feb. 12 Robert Earl Keen - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta Feb. 14 MXPX, Simple Plan, Billy Talent - Tabernacle, Atlanta - Feb. 14 O.A.R. - Tabernacle, Atlanta - Feb. 20 Hank Williams III - Masquerade, Atlanta - Feb. 26 Lou Rawls - Anderson Theatre, Mariet ta, Ga. Feb. 27

New Happy Hour Times!

NEW HAPPY HOUR This Week’s Weekly Special:

$3.75 FEATURING LIVE MUSIC

BY KEITH GREGORY

Food & Beverage Sunday!

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A.F.I. - Tabernacle, Atlanta - Feb. 28 Willie Nelson - Macon City Auditorium, Macon, Ga. - Feb. 29 Many tickets are available through TicketMaster outlets, by calling 828-7700, or online at w w w.ticketmaster.com. Tickets may also be available through Tix Online by calling 278-4TIX, online at w w w.tixonline.com or at their outlet location in Southgate Plaza. Night Life listings are subject to change without notice. Deadline for inclusion in Night Life calendar is Tuesday at 4 p.m. Contact Rhonda Jones or Lisa Jordan by calling 738-1142, fa xing 736-0443 or e-mailing to rhonda.jones@metrospirit.com or lisa.jordan@metrospirit.com.

$2 Appetizers

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Food & Beverage Sunday!

Catch Rev. Jeff Mosier at Stillwater Tap Room Jan. 30.

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2 0 0 4

Upcoming

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Coliseum - Q.A.F. Continuum - Monday Madness Fox’s Lair - Open Mic Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Michael’s - Mike Swif t

Food & Beverage Sunday!

J A N

Monday, 2nd

D. Timm’s - The Section Fox’s Lair - Open Mic Greene Streets - Karaoke Hangnail Gallery - Remembering Never, On Broken Wings, Calico System, Shat tered Realm The Helm - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Paul Arrowood Last Call - Karaoke with Tony Howard Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Playground - Karaoke Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Rusty Soul Bar - Live Jazz Surrey Tavern - Pat Blanchard

New Happy Hour Times!

S P I R I T

Orange Moon - Smooth Jazz Sunday with Emery Bennet t Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Rusty The Shack - Karaoke with DJ Joe Steel, Sasha Shannon’s - Super Bowl Par ty T.G.I. Friday’s - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Wheeler Tavern - Karaoke with DJ Dog

Food & Beverage Sunday!

M E T R O

New Happy Hour Times!

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Tonight!

J A N 2 9

Marc Ryan from Comedy Central and Collin Moulton

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Thurs Feb 5 Zack Thomas Master Hypnotist R-rated Show (10pm)

Thurs Feb 12 Featuring Atlanta’s Favorite Son Jerry Farber

Super Bowl Sunday Tailgate Party Begins at 5pm

Thurs Feb 19 Scotty K with Keith Alberstadt

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Valentine’s Menu Fri 13th and Sat 14 5:00 till 10:00pm All You Can Eat Seafood and Prime Rib Buffet Featured Selections Full Salad Bar to Include Soup Hand Carved Prime Rib w/ Au Jus Steamed Crab Legs w/ Drawn Butter Smoked Salmon Display Imported and domestic Cheese Display Oysters on the Half Shell Peel & Eat Shrimp Seafood Pasta Station Fresh Baked Salmon Southern Fried Catfish Chef ’s Choice of Seasonal Vegetables Fried Popcorn Shrimp Oven Roasted Potatoes Fried Select Oysters Assorted Cakes, Pies and Ice Cream

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News of the # Weird # H #

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IN PRINT OR ON THE WEB, METRO SPIRIT IS AUGUSTA’S SOURCE FOR NEWS, ARTS, ENTERTAINMENT, AND HAPPENINGS.

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appy New Year: Once again, authorities in the Hillbrow district of Johannesburg, South Africa, were unable to stop the traditional midnight celebrations, in which residents of high-rises toss refrigerators, ovens, beds, trash cans and other furniture off their balconies, and police, wearing crash helmets, try to dodge the fusillade. And People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals pressured officials of Brasstown, N.C., out of the traditional New Year’s Eve “possum drop” (lowering a caged opossum at the stroke of midnight, a la Times Square), causing the town to substitute a piece of roadkill. And Mr. Henry Earl was arrested in Lexington, Ky., on New Year’s Eve for being drunk and disorderly; his 11th such arrest that month and number 804 since 1992.

Knowledge Is Power Scientists on the cutting edge have recently developed cholesterol-free mice (by Quark Biotech), bisexual butterflies (by Butterfly Park in Singapore) and the “perfect” slice of buttered toast (by Arla Foods, Leeds, England). And a team of mathematicians using 200,000 computers found the largest “Mersenne prime” number ever, which is 6.3 million digits long; said a Michigan State grad student who worked on the project, “It’s a neat accomplishment, but it really doesn’t have any applicability.” And New York University professor Steven Brams and colleagues developed a nuanced politicaleconomic theory for efficiently dividing a cake among dessert lovers who insist on getting their fair shares.

Deja Vu All Over Again In January, in Florida’s first election using all touch-screen balloting (following the state’s 2000 presidential fiasco), Ellyn Bogdanoff won a special election for a state House seat from Broward County by 12 votes out of about 10,000 cast, but the losing candidate was considering a challenge over the 134 “voters” who had gone into the booths but for whom no votes were registered. (By the way, in January in San Antonio, Texas, Chad Allen Tolleson was arrested for burglarizing a store by climbing in through a ventilation duct; however, he got stuck, and early-arriving employees who found him dangling from the ceiling now refer to him as “Hanging Chad.”)

Cultural Diversity • Over a two-month period in the American Indian Miskito community of northern Nicaragua, about 150 people contracted a hysteria whose symptoms included wandering naked in public, becoming severely violent, fighting imaginary enemies and, later, lapsing into comalike states. Nicaraguan officials regard the illness, “grisi siknis,” as culture-bound, with traditional healers more effective at treating it than medical doctors (in contrast to affluent societies’ culture-bound illnesses, such as anorexia nervosa, which are often treated medically).

• As an example of the stunning heritage of honesty of the Japanese, the Tokyo police’s Lost and Found Center reported that the equivalent of U.S. $23 million in cash found by strangers was

turned in in 2002 (and almost $17 million eventually made it back to the rightful owners).

Also, reported The New York Times in January, 330,000 umbrellas were turned in (but fewer than 1,000 were claimed).

Latest Religious Messages • Televangelist Joyce Meyer has risen from the pack of TV ministers (and from the ordinariness of her pre-preaching life) by her uninhibited pursuit of donations ($95 million in 2003), according to a December St. Louis PostDispatch profile. “Make your checks payable to Joyce Meyer Ministries,” she shouted, “and ‘million’ is spelled m-i-l-l-i-o-n.” Of once receiving $1 million in stocks from a worshipper, she said, “I didn’t have that (gift) for five minutes and I said, ‘OK, God, next I’ll take $5 million.” “Fear,” she reminds her parishioners, as in their fear of making sacrifices in order to have more money to give her, “is the work of the devil.”

• The Los Angeles Kabbalah Centre is enjoying soaring income due to the Jewish mysticism’s recent embrace by pop celebrities (e.g., Madonna, Britney Spears), according to a December New York Times report. Kabbalah bottled water (which has supposedly absorbed the energy of the Torah by osmosis from being in the same room with it and which “changes you on a molecular level,” said a centre employee) costs $3.50, and red string bracelets, which supposedly ward off negative spirits (which Jewish traditionalists say is an appalling oversimplification of their purpose) cost $26 to $36.

God, the Micromanager Ten months before election day, God has handicapped the 2004 presidential race as a “blowout” victory for President Bush, according to Pat Robertson on his Christian Broadcasting Network program “700 Club” (January). And Connecticut’s besieged governor, John Rowland, who is in deep trouble for having taken favors from contractors and then (as he later admitted) lying about it, said he can’t resign because God spoke to him directly and ordered him to hang in and defend himself (December).

Recurring News of the Weird Themes In Clearwater, Fla., Mary Denise Flowers was arrested for stealing a $20,000 ring from Littman Jewelers, with the key prosecution evidence emerging only several days later when Flowers, whose modus operandi was to swallow the ring at the scene of the crime, finally “passed” it at a local hospital, where it was mined from her feces (December). And a home at 3715 Euclid Avenue in San Diego was completely demolished when a pilot light ignited the 19 bug bombs the homeowner had set; one canister would have been plenty lethal for the small area, but 19 yielded a bomb 28 times more powerful than necessary (December).

Recent Extreme Body Piercings (No Fatalities!)

Joy Wiggins (accidentally shot herself in the heart with a nail gun but was miraculously saved by doctors at Christus St. Elizabeth Hospital, Beaumont, Texas, October); Jed Bryant, 21 (accidentally shot by co-worker’s nail gun, 3 1/2 inches into his skull, Rapid City, S.D., January); Roxanne Kirtley (absentmindedly stood up, forcing her head against a protruding nail that went 2 inches into her skull, Dallas, August); and a 34-year-old laborer (fell and landed seatfirst on a rebar rod that, alas, impaled him through the buttocks, Toronto, Ontario, September).

— Chuck Shepherd © United Press Syndicate

Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ARIES (March 21-April 19) I suggest you deal creatively with budding tension between you and your allies. Maybe you could convince them to get down on the floor with you and tussle like puppies. Or how about organizing a game of paintball? Gather together in someone’s backyard and throw rocks at dishes, bottles and old TVs. Sneak a boombox into an abandoned building and have a guerrilla dance party. Or stage a Lying Contest in which everyone competes to tell the most outrageous whoppers. Any one of these strategies will go far towards ensuring the success of joint ventures in the coming weeks.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) “Mathematician Paul Erdos used to describe himself as a ‘machine for turning coffee into theorems,’” writes philosopher Helena Cronin at www.edge.org.

“In much the same way, genes are machines for turning oxygen, water, light, zinc, calcium and iron into bears, beetles, bacteria or bluebells.” According to my reading of the astrological omens, Taurus, it’s a perfect time to apply this way of thinking to yourself.

By the end of this week, see if you can fill in the blanks in the following sentence: “I am a machine for turning _______ into _______.” In other words, define the nature of the alchemical magic you are here on Earth to carry out.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) In his masterpiece, The Divine Comedy, Gemini poet Dante Alighieri described Hell as having nine levels, each deeper in the earth and each filled with more terrible sinners than the one above it. Condemned to the eighth level, along with liars, pimps, hypocrites and frauds, were astrologers. Yet in another book, The Convivio, Dante expressed a reverence for astrology, calling it the highest and most noble of all the sciences. Was he confused? No. He believed that though astrology is a high and noble science, some of

ACROSS

Canyon Padrone Gold star, e.g.

Ain’t right?

Even, to Yvette Procter & Gamble brand 17 Musical embellishment 19 Went pffft 20 Singer with the 1999 #1 hit “Believe” 21 Fasten over 22 Italian dancer ___ Cecchetti 24 Dracula prototype 26 Big mouth 27 Major annoyance 29 Bill passer 31 The Buckeyes, briefly 8 12 14 15 16

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) In Norway, women comprise 40 percent of the government, and state-owned businesses are required to have at least 40 percent of their board seats filled by women. Private companies will have to meet this standard by 2005. In contrast, 14 percent of the U.S. government is female, while American women hold 13 percent of their country’s corporate board seats. If you’re thinking what I am, the government and corporations of our country desperately need a makeover. I nominate the Leo tribe to lead the charge in the coming months. The astrological omens suggest that whatever gender you are, you will have an enhanced ability to promote females and feminine values in any sphere where you have influence. Start immediately, and be ingeniously relentless.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Jack Nicklaus had more major tournament wins than any other golfer in history. Skill and practice were at

with “the” 34 Still-life vessel 35 With 39-Across, a common greeting 37 Dayton-toToledo dir.

38 Summer mo.

39 See 35-Across 41 Avoids 43 Common cricket score 46 Ethically indifferent 48 Awful 50 Gaslight 51 Pitcher with 5,714 lifetime strikeouts 53 They’re often settled 54 “Wait Until Dark” co-star, 1967 56 Total requirement?

58 Punchers

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE T I M E S H A R E

O V E R E A G E R

R A N G E P O L E

E L O P E

M A T E O

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P U L A L R O P E N R A Y G R I Y O U O S S R T E E R P A P L E

A S I A N S O P A S L O P

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

One of the things I like best about the Dalai Lama (our fellow Crab) is his practical approach to spirituality. An interviewer once urged him to discourse on how to cultivate lovingkindness. His Holiness said something like, “That may be too much to ask.

How about if we just work on getting the ‘kindness’ part right?” I bring this up, Cancerian, because the astrological omens suggest that there’s nothing more important for you in the coming week than to be charitable and helpful. It doesn’t matter whether or not you feel charitable and helpful; be that way anyway.

32 Fireworks time,

1 PC bailout 4 Utah’s ___

New York Times Crossword Puzzle

its practitioners abuse it so dreadfully they give it a bad name. Can you do what Dante did, Gemini? Can you comfortably hold big paradoxes? I hope so.

Wherever you seem to see nonsensical incongruities this week, you will need to penetrate deeper and understand better.

R I S H E D T O F E I S A N T A G I W H I L K A L E W D Y A H R E M A D A I S R S T A N S G E E E R S

A P W H O I R D E S D O A V K I E T H I U Z M E

D U A N E

O T T E R

I D E N T I K I T

C O N G O L E S E

59 Like some

modern signals 61 Church recital 62 Thickening agent in food 63 Sea of ___, arm of the Black Sea 64 “Borstal Boy” author 65 Wails 66 ___ Martin (cognac) 67 What the Cubs play games in: Abbr.

DOWN

1 Like ones

starting over Vile Tally-ho, e.g.

Pine (for) Opposite of making progress 6 Twist 7 School for future Lts. 8 “Good!” in Genoa 9 Traveling up a down staircase, e.g.

10 Fill up 11 Person in 39-Down 12 Cab Calloway, King of ___ 13 Sheep 18 “Das Lied von der ___” 20 Designer Chanel 23 ___ noir 25 Bat wood 2 3 4 5

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the heart of his athletic prowess, but on at least one occasion he tapped into a more mysterious source of power. In 1973, he got into an uncharacteristic slump that had him stumped. Then one night he had a dream in which he experimented with a new grip on his clubs. When he went to the golf course the next morning, he tried the dream’s suggestion. It worked; his funk ended. I hope you’ll draw inspiration from Nicklaus’ example, Virgo. If you start drawing a blank in your area of expertise, be willing to call on help you’d normally never seek — maybe even the woo-woo kind.

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I invoke Kwan Yin, Chinese goddess of compassion, and ask her to receive the cry of your heart. I pray to Agni, Hindu god of fire, that he might arouse and feed your most catalytic creativity. I summon Bast, Egyptian goddess of play, to show you how to deepen your commitment to life by having more fun. Finally, I offer a bribe to Lilith, Pagan trickster goddess, in the hope that she will steal one of your inhibitions and reveal to you the location of an erogenous zone you’ve neglected.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Astrologer Steven Forrest says that you Scorpios are experts at picking the locks to your unconscious minds. Many of the other signs prefer to keep their hidden depths off-limits, but you are inexhaustible explorers, always burrowing down further into the Scary Unknown to discover more clues to the Great Mystery. Libras may specialize in fostering beauty and harmony, and Cancers are masters of nurturing, but your sign is adept at busting taboos and undoing repression. I hope you’re ready to live up to your reputation, because the coming weeks will be prime time for your signature brand of soul retrieval.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) The way politicians create legislation is akin to how the meat industry makes sausage. The average person might like or benefit from the result, but she’d really prefer not to know how it’s done or what goes into it.

Though you may not be a sausage-maker or politician, Sagittarius, I foresee a similar kind of process occupying your attention in the coming week. Your challenge will be to patch together a workable, maybe even attractive, outcome by taking care of all the messy details with discreet integrity.

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Puzzle by John Underwood

28 Beefcake poser 30 Modern: Ger. 33 Hawaii, once:

Abbr.

36 Old Mideast

inits.

38 “Hold on ___!”

39 See 11-Down 40 Explorer

Vespucci

1-900-950-7700

$1.99 per minute • 18 & over • touchtone phone required • C/S 612-373-9785 • www.freewillastrology.com

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You can call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your Expanded Weekly Horoscope

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PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) The task you’ll be faced with this week reminds me of what Australian TV personality Steve Irwin did a few weeks ago. No, you won’t have to literally stand next to a 13-foot crocodile and feed it a hunk of meat by hand while cradling a baby in your other arm. But you may very well have to be fierce and tender at the same time, or wild and protective or daring and loving.

— © Rob Brezsny

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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) In the last 50 years, America’s Great Plains area has lost a third of its population, due largely to the disappearance of family farms. People are moving out in droves. Ghost towns are proliferating. From one perspective, that’s sad, but from another, it’s cause for celebration: The wilderness is returning in some places, and vast herds of buffalo once again roam the land. Is there any chance you’d consider initiating a comparable transformation in your inner realms during the coming weeks, Aquarius? Personally, I’d like to see some of your over-civilized parts revert to the natural state. According to my reading of the astrological omens, the cosmos agrees with me.

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CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) It’s prime time for you to steal good ideas from creative innovators and use them to enhance your life. You’re in an astrological phase when imitation of the right influences — bright and beautiful and benevolent influences — can lead to rapid progress.

(Please don’t imitate mediocre, mean-spirited behavior, though.) Copy the styles of fashion adepts, Capricorn. Borrow the successful methods that your competitors and cohorts have employed at their jobs.

Read stories about people who are skilled at the art of living and adopt their strategies as your own. You should always give credit to your sources, of course.

The point is not to pretend you’re the most original thinker in the history of the world, but to make yourself happier and freer.

41 Sneaky 52 Throw 42 Narwhal feature 55 Some bargain bin items, for 44 Marcos of the

short Philippines 57 Impose 45 It may be written on a chalkboard 60 “The blood-red blossom of ___ 47 Classic New …”: Tennyson Yorker cartoonist 61 Toronto media 49 Zoomed inits.

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.20 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554.

Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. Online subscriptions: Today's puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/crosswords ($34.95 a year).

Crosswords for young solvers: The Learning Network, nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

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M

y husband planned a weekend vacation for the two of us. He bought me an outfit for the occasion — a black leather miniskirt, knee-high boots and fishnet stockings. This is not my style, so I returned it and bought something more conservative.

My husband is very hurt. Why would he want me to keep something I won’t wear?

— Dressed Down In your perfect world, trashy paperbacks sold in drugstore checkout lines would be written

by L.L.Bean: “She bent over him, her flannel nightgown grazing his arm. He cupped her sensible shoes in his hands, aching to run his finger along the curve of one of her Fresh Step insoles. Her cheeks growing hot, she lowered her eyes. It was time. She whirled into the closet, the click of the lock behind her a cruel reprimand. Swathed in darkness, fighting back yards of flower-print flannel, she struggled into her control-top wool tights. ‘Heartless wench,’ he whimpered, his face pressed into the closet door. ‘I’m begging you, come out and talk quarterly earnings to me while I run my tongue along the hems of your wool-blend career coordinates.’”

Your husband’s perfect world is a little more “as-seen-on MTV” — guest-starring you as a freak-dancing fly girl instead of a tired career woman sleepwalking in her Lanz nightgown.

Unfortunately for him, he’s married to a woman who doesn’t just look a gift horse in the mouth, but hauls it off to the glue factory immediately afterward. For future reference, when somebody gives you a gift, the appropriate response goes like this: “Wow! My very own leaking barrel of toxic waste!” Accepting with any less enthusiasm is a major rejection — of both the gift and the giver. (In time, you might discreetly ring the proper authorities so they can declare your living room rug a national disaster area qualifying for Superfund cleanup.)

Come on, it isn’t like your husband got you backless hot pants to wear to client meetings.

He planned a romantic weekend and bought the woman he loves some mildly trashy new clothes — instead of going for a mildly trashy new woman who already has the outfits. The goal here wasn’t adding to your working girl wardrobe, but to your collective sexual repertoire. So, what about keeping your sex life hot is not your style?

OK, so you aren’t comfortable in nasty-girl clothes. We all know the feminist party line: A woman should never, ever do anything that makes her feel uncomfortable. That might not be

one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard, but it does come close. Perhaps it’s escaped your notice, but the world is not exactly one great big comfort zone. That’s why you spend much of your lifetime working and paying a lot of taxes, instead of lying around and being massaged with hot oil by a harem of male models.

Would it have killed you to wear this stuff in private? At the very least, you could have accepted it with grace, confessed later to feeling not-quite-fly enough for full hookercasual, then pledged to fishnet up under one of your stern corporate pantsuits. If only you’d made the slightest effort, he’d probably be feeling grateful and loving instead of slapped upside the ego. When something means a lot to someone you love, and giving it to them won’t exactly scar you for life, maybe you should try. Even if it means wearing a mangy chicken suit and hopping around your front yard clucking wildly. If this helps your husband stay hot for you, do you really have a problem with it? Sure, you’ll look like a major idiot, but you’ll be a happily married major idiot.

–––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– A guy I’d dated briefly said he wanted to begin a serious relationship with me. When he suddenly stopped calling, I called him. He said he’d been having family problems, but his feelings for me hadn’t changed, and he’d call soon. He never did. Lately, we’re always running into each other. Seeing him reminds me of how he left me hanging, so I’m too embarrassed to make eye contact. How can I put the past to rest when I see him constantly?

— Aspiring Amnesiac You’d earn a tidy living working as an Embarrassment Surrogate. When other people do socially unacceptable things, just shoulder their embarrassment for a moderate fee — from hanging your head ($30/hr.) to dying of embarrassment (market price). Too bad you aren’t getting paid for your first case.

Apparently, the client had poor follow-through.

What does this say about you? Only that you were dating somebody with poor followthrough. Suffering in shame over this makes about as much sense as feeling mortified that you didn’t hear from a telemarketer today.

(Maybe word of your loserhood is getting around?) Either that, or he was too busy selling one of your potential clients a miracle gizmo to shave his back.

— © 2004, Amy Alkon

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Seeking nice, friendly SW/HF, 30-47. !965931 GIVE ME A CALL SWM, 40, 5’8”, 185lbs, salt-n-pepper/green, N/S, enjoys fishing, horseback riding, stargazing, martial arts, reading, quiet times home.

Seeking that special woman to share life, laughs and maybe love. !834688

DARE YOU TO ENJOY LIFE SWM, 35, 5’10”, with above-average looks, military officer, N/S, loves travel. ISO an exciting, adventurous woman, 22-50, N/S, who likes to have fun. !830590 LOOKING FOR YOU SBM, 34, 6’2”, 235lbs, N/S, loves cooking, and loves to romance you. Seeking woman, 20-40.

If you’re reading this ad, let’s hook up. !815532 CAPRICORN SWM, 36, 5’10”, average build, smoker, seeks a sweet WF, 28-46, for friendship, possible romance. !818386 OPEN-MINDED, EASYGOING SWM, 27, 5’8”, 125lbs, blond/blue, smoker, loves pizza. Seeking WF, 25-45, smoker, for friendship, possible romance. !819355 HIDDEN TREASURE Male, 27, 5’9”, 160lbs, blond/blue, Aries, N/S, seeks WF, 18-30, a straight shooter, who can appreciate an authentic Mr. Nice Guy type. !819406 DOWN FOR WHATEVER SBM, 18, 5’7”, Scorpio, N/S, student, seeks BF, 18-21, N/S, with a good head on her shoulders. No games. !799082 OPEN-MINDED GUY SBM, 5’11”, 20, well-groomed, Capricorn, N/D, N/S, enjoys basketball, friends, dining, music.

Seeking nice, real woman, 18-25, for LTR. !800701 I’M INTRIGUED...

Male, 5’10”, athletic build, 30, Scorpio, N/S, seeks woman, 21-48, with interesting views and something to say. !801577 DO YOU LIKE 2 TRAVEL SM, 59, sociable and fun, enjoys bingo, dining out, movies, travel, more. Seeking sincere, happy, spontaneous lady for possible LTR. !774081

Stud Finder YOU HAVE 6 NEW MATCHES

BE MY TEDDY BEAR SWF, 32, 5’3’’, 180lbs, auburn/blue, no kids, never married, enjoys movies, sports, travel, dining, bowling, cuddling, quiet evenings.

Seeking honest, romantic SBM, similar interests, for dating, possible LTR. !894568 COULD THIS BE YOU? SBF, 45, 5’4”, full-figured, Taurus, N/S, enjoys church, dining out, reading, and quiet times at home. ISO BM, 45-65, N/S, for LTR. !810309 WAITING FOR YOU SB mom, 24, Virgo, seeks a man for days at the park, the mall, or at the movies, and spending time with family and friends. !883496 LOOKING FOR YOU SWF, 37, 5’6”, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys mountains, bowling, the beach and music. Seeking WM, 35-48, N/S, to be a companion, friend. !456544 I WANT TO LOVE YOU SBF, 18, 5’2”, Cancer, enjoys writing poetry, walks on the beach, hanging out and enjoying life. Seeking BM, 18-24, who will treat her right, and expects the same in return. !880193 ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE Honest SWF, 28, 5’10”, 210lbs, blonde/blue, enjoys classic rock, horror movies, and quiet nights at home. Seeking SW/HM, 18-40, for friendship, possible LTR. !874789 LOVE OF LIFE Attractive, classy, vivacious SWCF, 50ish, N/S, N/D, seeks SWCM, N/S, N/D, who is honest, financially/mentally secure, and ready for commitment. !875741 JAZZY MISS Slender and attractive SBPF, 31, loves music, conversation, travel. Seeking kind, friendly, honest and family-oriented SBM, 30-38, for fun times. !865339 MAKE YOUR OWN DESTINY Loving, intelligent SBF, 34, seeks SBM, 35-45, for companionship, long walks, movies, dining out and more. !550597 SIMPLE KIND OF LIFE SWF, 34, listens to country and oldies music, and wants to meet a man to cuddle up on the couch and watch a good movie, or enjoy other simple pleasures. !860787 LOOKING FOR ME Female, 34, Leo, smoker, seeks man, 25-38, for romance, real friendship, with similar interests, possibly more later on. !844726 OLD-FASHIONED LADY SWCF, 48, 5’3”, 150lbs, blonde/green, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys church, Bible studies, music, dining out. Seeking SWCM, 35-60, N/S, for friendship and more. !840939 NEVER SAY NEVER SWF, 41, 5’2”, blonde/blue, cuddly, new to area, Kentucky girl, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys cooking, waterfalls, kissing, long walks.

Seeking WM, 38-46, for friendship, and who knows? !686314 HIKER HEAVEN SWF, 45, full-figured, N/S, enjoys church, exploring, old movies, auctions, and gym.

Seeking WM, 46-56, N/S. Let’s make tracks together. !807679 MY OTHER HALF! SF, 46, 5’9’’, loves art, camping, fishing, animals, just getting away, relaxing. Seeking SM, 40-50, with the same interests. !732412 DREAM GUY SBF, 29, searching for open-minded, outgoing SM, 22-38, military man A+, for friendship, fun nights out, dancing, talks and maybe more. !836990

SOMEONE TO LOVE SWF, 48, enjoys a good horror movie, a drama or a comedy. Seeking a man for romance, quiet times at home, or just dancing the night away! !832399 LOVES TO BOWL WF, 48, petite, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys Chicano cuisines. Seeking WM, 46-59, N/S, very outgoing, for LTR. !806136 ADVENTUROUS MOM SBF, 29, Cancer, N/S, loves beaches, horror movies, and horseback riding. Seeking man, 25-40, N/S, strong-minded, who loves kids. !808682 HI! I’m a 49-year-old SWF and I WLTM a onewoman’s man, very lonely person. I WLTM a gentleman who would to be good to me and treat me w/kindness and gentleness. !793024 A VERY SERIOUS WOMAN SBPF, 34, mother of 3, nurse, independent and secure, enjoys church, movies, dining. looking for commitment-minded, level-headed, spiritual, spontaneous, respectful man, who truly appreciates a good woman. Sound like you? !777612 AQUARIUS SEEKING SWF, 46, 5’6”, smoker, enjoys cuddling, movies, gardening. Seeking honest, handsome SWM, 40-50, with similar interests, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !759515 THE LORD, ABOVE ALL SBCF, 38, Pisces, N/S, in the medical field (works private duty), would like to meet SBCM, 38-50, who shares my love of the Lord, for LTR. !727626 TRAVEL, ANIMALS... and movies make me happy. SWF, 53, Capricorn, N/S, loves the fall and spring and visiting Gatlinburg, TN. Seeking WM, 55-56, for LTR. !728854 SEARCHING FOR MR RIGHT SBPF, 39, Libra, loves church, traveling, movies, and dining out. Seeking SBPM, 37-60, for possible LTR. !421273 FRIEND IN FAITH SBF, 47, Capricorn, N/S, involved with church, very creative, artistic, designs tile and cards.

Seeking BCM, 44-58, involved with church, who loves the Lord. !707742 SOUND IN MIND SWF, 40, 5’6’’, brown/green, mother, Pisces, N/S, N/Drugs, seeks attractive, good guy, sound in mind, body, and soul, for friendship, dating, possibly more. !701180 YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO SBF, 39, Leo, N/S, seeks BM, 38-45, down-toearth, very direct and straightforward, to have fun with. !582549 I’D LIKE TO HEAR... what you have to say. SBF, 18, 5’5”, darkskinned, pretty, Aries, N/S, enjoys shopping, vacations, and movies. Seeking a man, 20-28. !578781 RAINY DAYS AND COOKING... are a few of my delights. DBF, 38, 5’5”, 125lbs, pecan tan complexion, laid-back, down-toearth, Aquarius, smoker, N/D, seeks BM, 3045. !569952 SINGLE MOM SEEKING SBF, 20, Gemini, N/S, mother of twins, likes going to the park, spending time with family, going to the mall, movies, seeks compatible SBM, 18-35, N/S. !532672 WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO LOSE? SWF, 48, Cancer, N/S, seeks WM, 40-56, who wants to have a great relationship. Why not give me a call? You never know. !511453 LOOKING FOR LOVE SWF, 24, blonde/brown, attractive, compassionate, easygoing, desires SWM, 24-34, honest, open-minded for friendship and companionship. !323553 WHOLE LOTTA LOVE SBF, 33, would like to share movies, dinners, quiet evenings at home, the usual dating activities, with a great guy. !463610

Mobile Dating. The easiest way to meet great people.

GUIDELINES: DATE MAKER ads are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses. First meetings should occur in a public place. Abbreviations are permitted only to indicate gender preference, race, and religion. We suggest your ad contain a self-description, age range, lifestyle and avocations. Ads and voice messages containing explicit sexual language will not be accepted. This publication reserves the right to revise copy containing objectionable phrases; to reject in its sole discretion, any advertisement on account of its text. This publication assumes no responsibility for the content or reply to any DATE MAKER ad. The advertiser assumes complete liability for the content and all replies to any advertisement or recorded message and for any claims made against this publication and its agents as a result thereof. The advertiser agrees to indemnify and hold this publication, its employees and its agents harmless from all costs, expenses (including reasonable attorney fees), liabilities and damages resulting from or caused by the publication or recording placed by the a service of advertiser or any reply to any such advertisement. By using DATE MAKER, the advertiser agrees not to leave his/her phone number, last name or address in his/her voice greeting. Not all boxes contain a voice greeting.

ABBREVIATIONS

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M B D F H C LTR

Male Black Divorced Female Hispanic Christian Long-term Relationship

G W A S J P N/D N/S

Gay White Asian Single Jewish Professional Non-Drinker Non-smoker

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FUN-FILLED DAYS AWAIT SBM, 24, enjoys taking trips, nice restaurants, fun evenings, dancing, quality time together.

Seeking masculine SBM, 20-55, for possible relationship. !894435

ACTIVE SBM SBM, 49, Pisces, N/S, enjoys bowling, movies, playing sports, seeks compatible BM, 30-46, N/S, with similar interests. !846543 GREAT PERSONALITY SBM, 18, 6’3”, 220lbs, masculine build, seeking SBM, 18-29, very masculine, energetic, fun-loving, to go out for dinners, walks and more. !627150 LOOKING FOR COOL CAT... to converse with. SBM, 34, Capricorn, N/S, game and drama-free, seeks BM, 26-48, serious-minded, with sense of direction in life. !889038 LET’S GET TOGETHER GWPM, 37, 5’9”, brown/brown, who enjoys reading, movies, politics, entertainment, seeks a guy for dating, possibly growing into more. !883365 EASY TO TALK TO SWM, 48, loves good Italian or French cuisine, and is looking for a man who is easy to get along with, for romance. !870126 SEEKING SPECIAL GENTLEMAN SBM, 33, 6’2”, 245lbs, Taurus, N/S, likes movies, camping, music, reading, sports.

Seeking out GM, 35-48, for friendship, possible romance. !824261 I WANT TO MEET YOU! GBM, 32, 5’7”, average build, Pisces, N/S, likes reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports.

Seeking outgoing, caring GWM, 24-45, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !850885 SEEKS MAN WITH DIRECTION GBM, 33, Capricorn, N/S, seeks understanding, level-headed, secure GBM, 25-48, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !854633 INTERESTED? Independent SWM, 37, 5’8”, 150lbs, brown/brown, would like to meet fun-loving, honest, real, professional, secure female to share dates, talks, walks, dinners and romance. !848764 FUN TO HANG AROUND WITH GWM, 52, 5’2”, smoker, enjoys playing pool, having fun, seeks outgoing GWM, 40-55, smoker, with similar interests. !844895 SEEKING SOMEONE SINCERE GWM, 42, 5’11”, 175lbs, brown/blue, somewhat masculine, outgoing and friendly, likes dining out, travel, movies and shopping.

Looking to meet honest, passionate SBM, with similar interests, for dating, possible LTR. !769411 FRIENDSHIP FIRST GWM, 26, 5’3”, athletic build, N/S, likes sports, working out, travel, reading, swimming.

Seeking non-smoking GW/AM, 20-26, with similar interests. !764332 HEALTHY AND FIT SBM, 25, 5’5”, 170lbs, masculine, nighttime inventory stocker, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys working out. Seeking energetic, passionate, masculine WM, 20-50, N/S. !708544 A LOT TO OOFER Outgoing SWM, 5’ 10”, average build, 44, Capricorn, smoker, seeks WM, 40-50, smoker, to date and enjoy a lifetime companionship. !691527 DONT MISS OUT Fun-loving GWM, 24, likes sports, dining out, movies, quiet evenings at home, music.

Seeking romantic, affectionate GM, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !675371 SEEKING FRIENDSHIP SBM, 6’1”, 214lbs, enjoys indoor activities.

Seeking masculine SW/BM, honest, sincere, who is looking for new friendships. !737679 SPRINGTIME BLOOM SWM, 33, with an education in business, seeks a man who loves country music, karaoke, springtime, and making a connection with a good person. !659296 ROAM IF YOU WANT TO SWM, 42, loves cool weather and the renewal of Spring. Seeking a man who is strong both physically and emotional. !661792

How do you

RELAXING AT HOME SBM, 35, Virgo, N/S, likes relaxing at home, fun, concerts, trips going to the beach. Seeks fun, spontaneous SBM, 26-37, N/S. !532700 TAKE A CHANCE GWM, 43, 6’2”, 195lbs, black brown, seeks other GWM, for fun times and maybe something more. !493530 LET’S MEET FOR COFFEE Good-looking GWM, 36, 6’, 200lbs, muscular, tan, enjoys working out, yard work, spending time with my dogs. Looking for attractive SM, 32-48, for dating, maybe leading to LTR. !436231 ME IN A NUTSHELL WM, 18, brown/blue, medium build, looking for fun, outgoing, energetic guy, 18-30, for movies, hanging out, quiet evenings at home, and more. Friends first, maybe becoming serious. !425471

READY TO HAVE FUN! SF, 25, seeks femme, 25-35, race not important, who is nice, pretty, slim. Let’s talk and get to know one another! !895256 WAITING FOR YOU SBF, 19, is in search of a friend first, maybe more with time, with a lady who likes to get out and have fun. !874312

WHY WAIT? SWF, 38, 5’6”,140lbs, short brown hair, easygoing, enjoys playing golf, the beach. Seeking feminine female, 20-40, to have fun times and more. !448489 LOVES CHILDREN Easygoing, nice SF, 32, looking for someone with the same qualities, 29-39, and a people person. !388943 ONLY A WOMAN WILL KNOW GBF, Capricorn, N/S, likes reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports. Seeking outgoing, caring GWF, 27-52, N/S, with similar interests, for dating and more. !850614 THE SWEETEST THING SBF, 26, 5’8”, 145lbs, wants to get out and have fun with a new friend, maybe more with time. !832018 1 YOU’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR BiWF, 27, enjoys everything, promises you won’t regret it. If you’re looking for a good time and friendship, I’ll be perfect for you. !830500 PLAYS GUITAR, WRITES... poetry, and rollerblades.

NativeAmerican/African-American female, 18, 5’5”, 117lbs, very toned, laid-back, a goofball at times, N/S, seeks woman, 18-29. !818596 BONEVILLE BABE SWF, 31, 5’5”, 130lbs, brown/green, smoker, enjoys playing golf, movies, and picnics at the lake. Seeking WF, 25-40, for friends, possibly more. !818908 DIVA WITH DIMPLES Independent DWF, 23, Gemini, smoker, enjoys hip-hop, R&B, and country music. Seeking WF, 20-30, smoker, for friendship, possible romance. !808179

GET TO KNOW ME SBF, 25, Taurus, N/S, enjoys movies, travel.

Seeking woman, 21-30, N/S, for friendship, possible romance. !803723 A LOT TO OFFER Non-smoking GBF, 37, N/S, seeks very attractive, unique, romantic, fun, intelligent, feminine GF, 27-37, for friendship, dating, possibly more. !749660 A NEW BEGINNING Attractive and outgoing SWF, 5’ 5”, Athletic build, 20, Aquarius, smoker, loves the outdoors, camping and hiking. Seeking WF, 2150, for LTR. !751226 JUST THE FACTS SBPF, 41, Libra, N/S, seeks PF, age and race unimportant, who enjoys dining out, quiet times at home, and movies, for LTR. !730225 SEEKING STRONG FRIENDSHIP BiWF, 27, 5’8’’, 145lbs, student, enjoys romantic comedies, fall, quiet restaurants. Seeking female for clubbing, shopping, dancing, dining, movies, television. !700095 LOOKING FOR A FRIEND GBF, 38, black/brown, medium build, N/S, likes dining out, movies, travel, sports. Seeking kind, sweet, honest GBF, 30-38, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !695904 ENJOYS BOWLING SBF, 32, Gemini, N/S, 5’3”, 145lbs, mother of one, enjoys movies, the mall, dining, going out to eat, bowling, quiet times at home, seeks woman, 21-38, for friendship, possible romance. !646271 BEAUTIFUL AND FEMININE GWF, 32, 5’7”, 135lbs, enjoys reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports, music, movies.

Seeking GWF, 25-39, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !329063

t r a t s Kick sion this

the pas s ’s Day. e n i t n e l a V Place an ad we’ll help you get things moving!

© 2004 TPI GROUP

MAYBE YOU’RE MY LADY Honest, friendly SM, 46, auburn/green, likes scuba diving, motorcycles, travel, Elvis, documentaries. Seeking SF to share happy times, talks, and possible relationship. !776373 STARTING OVER Non-smoking SM, 19, 5’11”, 155lbs, brown/brown, medium build, likes movies, travel, sports, reading, quiet evenings at home.

Seeking outgoing, adventurous SF, 18-21, N/S, for LTR. !752673 A LOT TO OFFER easygoing SWM, 5’ 11”, Athletic build, 23, Cancer, N/S, seeks woman, 18-35, for friendship, possible romance. !761055 CIRCLE THIS AD SWM, 5’ 10”, Average build, 45, Gemini, smoker, with salt-n-pepper hair, loves cooking.

Seeking fun loving WF, 30-45, for friendship, possible romance. !762032 DONT PASS ME BY SWM, 41, Sagittarius, smoker, who enjoys cooking. Seeking Attractive WF, 30-50, to date. !752123 ACTUAL NICE GUY Independent, professional SBM, 5’ 9”, Average build, 30, Pisces, with a nice smile, N/S, seeks woman, 27-37, N/S, for friendship, possible romance. !751873 CALL ON MY Active, fun and intellectual SBM, 5’ 11”, Slim build, 20, Sagittarius, smoker, seeks woman, 20-24, smoker, for friendship, possible romance. !755250 CAN WE TALK ?

Spiritual SWM, 44, Capricorn, smoker, who enjoys the Fall. Seeking AF, 30-50, for LTR. !755341 ACTUAL NICE GUY Handsome, outgoing, open-minded SWM, 5’ 11”, Average build, 51, Leo, smoker, enjoys traveling. Seeking woman, 40-50, for LTR. !733850 FUNNY GUY SBM, 30, 5’9”, brown/brown, medium build, N/S, into sports, movies, dining out, friends, quiet times. Seeking down-to-earth, romantic SF, 29-35, who knows what she wants. !718864 HERE I AM! SM, 43, likes playing golf, the outdoors, nature, country music, some rock-n-roll. Would like to get together with a young lady, 27-45, who likes the same things. !703650 COMMITMENT-MINDED SWM, 5’7”, slim build, new to area, enjoys reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports.

Seeking SF, 25-47, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !695638 WELL-ROUNDED MAN Educated SBPM, 41, 5’11”, loves reading, working out, the arts, dining out, travel, quiet times. Would like to meet SWF, 30-45, with similar interests, for fun, friendship, and maybe more. !442021 COLLEGE-EDUCATED SWM, 51, 6’1”, 193lbs, with blue eyes and a laid-back attitude, seeks a woman with a spontaneous, creative spirit. !434997 HEART OF GOLD SWM, 31, 6’3”, 210lbs, brown/blue, enjoys reading, movies, travel, sports. Seeking outgoing, attractive SF, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !556440 LOOKING FOR MS. RIGHT SWM, 37, 5’9”, 180lbs, enjoys biking, sports, travel, dining out. Seeking outgoing, attractive SF, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !557954

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THE COLISEUM

Premier Entertainment Complex & High Energy Dance Music

Friday, January 30th Charlie Brown from Back Street Atlanta Saturday, January 31st Petite DeJohnville

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Open Mon-Fri 8pm-3am Sat 8pm-2:30am

Fri & Sat. No Cover Before 10 p.m.

1632 Walton Way • Augusta, GA

706-733-2603

Email: ColiseumAugusta@aol.com

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$1.00 D ra Every N ft ight All Nigh t

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STARLIGHT CABARET THUR - Dance Party SAT - Dance Party FRI - Dance Party Lauren Alexander Dana Anderson & DJ Mark & DJ Mark SUN- Dance Party Claire Storm & DJ Jon Jon

Pilates

Become A Massage Therapist

Aiken’s Ultimate Dance Club ! !

Drink Specials: WACKY WEDNESDAYS Free Draft & Well from 10pm-12am FRI & SAT Famous Beer Bust All You Can Drink $9

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Mind, Body & Spirit

MARLBORO STATION ! !

47

2 9 2 0 0 4

We exceed the minimum requirements for certification through the National Certification Board for Therapeutic Massage & Bodywork.

141 Marlboro Street, N.E. Aiken S.C. • 803-644-6485

Augusta School of Massage Inc.

18 to Party • 21 to Drink • No Cover With This Ad

Call Today For Details!

733-2040

3512 1/2 Wheeler Road • Augusta, GA 30909 Full Body Massage!

Therapeutic tension relief, intense or tender touch, rela xing music, aromatherapy, by appointment only - $49.00/hr.

Call Joy - 706-771-9470 or John - 706-868-5598 (01/29#8326)

Music

Poor Water Drainage?

• French Drains • Gutter Drains • Catch Basins • Erosion Control • Waterproofing • Crawl Space

Mrs. Graham, Psychic Reader, Advises on all affairs of life, such as love, marriage, and business. She tells your past, present and future. Mrs. Graham does palm, tarot card, and Chakra balancing. She specializes in relationships and reuniting loved ones.

SPECIAL READINGS WITH CARD

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R E A D I N G S

341 S. Belair Rd. Open from 9 a.m. til 9 p.m.

Call (706) 733-5851

Professional Massage Therapist • Spor ts massage • Repetitive injury therapy • Carpal tunnel syndrome Golfers and boxers are welcome.

706-592-9450 or 399-8527 (01/29#8341)

Employment

Business Opportunity

Owner-Operators Star t the New Year at A.T.C. Dedicated routes between Atlanta and Charleston. Containers.

Must own truck!

Todd 800-550-5961 (01/29#8343)

Live Life at the NEXX Level!

Own Your Own Business PT/FT Training Provided Call Me Today 888-742-1777 LeRoy NEX X Independent Rep (01/29#8332)

Rosedale Transport Needs OTR Drivers, both team and solo.

If you have one year experience, CDL Class A with haz-mat, good driving record. Home weekly, 1-800-486-3681 (01/29#8345)

Equipment WOLFF TANNING BEDS

AFFORDABLE • CONVENIENT Tan At Home Payments From $25/month FREE Color Catalog Call Today 1-800-842-1305 (01/29#8320)

Professional Massage By experienced male.

Designed for healthy men 18 - 55 only.

A great way to rela x House & Hotel Calls Only 706-589-9139 (02/12#8347) Diamond Massage Therapy Dr. Scot tie Diamond and our qualified staf f of professionals of fer in home massage therapy, migraine relief, pedicures, manicures, & acne treatments. Your first acne treatment is free. We come to you at your convenience.

Call 803-827-9300 (01/29#8346)

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Services

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S P I R I T J A N

Augusta School of Massage Inc. is now accepting applications for day & evening courses. Ask how to receive a free massage table.

DOORS OPEN AT 8:00 THURS, FRI, SAT, & SUN • 8PM-2AM

M E T R O

GUARANTEED SOLUTIONS

Private Investigator RAY WILLIAMSON & ASSOCIATES Private Investigations 17 years experience Domestic Relations and Child Custody Cases Licensed and Bonded in Georgia & Carolina 706-854-9672 or 706-854-9678 fax (01/29#8327) Premier Investigations •Domestic •Child Custody •Background Checks •Cover t Surveillance 869-1667 (01/29#8334)

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www.sundownconstruction.com

Telephone Service Unlimited Long-Distance & Local Calling One Price, One Bill, One Company Keep Your Same Phone # Call 1-800-392-4050 Eula NEX X Independent Rep (01/29#8331)

Travel

Real Estate OLDETOWN

DOWNTOWN CONVENIENCE SPACIOUS 2 BR, 2 1/2 BATH TOWNHOUSE $685 PER MONTH, PLUS DEPOSIT WILL SELL FOR $75,000 CALL 706-877-4419 OR 706-877-4420 FOR APPOINTMENT (01/29#8337)

Religion Metropolitan Community Church of Our Redeemer A Christian Church reaching to all: including Gay, Lesbian, and Transgendered Christians.

Meeting at 557 Greene Street, 11 am and 6 pm each Sunday. 722-6454 MCCOurRedeemer@aol.com www.mccoor.com (01/22#8128)

Wheels

Dead Bodies Wanted

We want your dead junk or scrap car bodies.

We tow away and for some we pay.

706/829-2676

OR

706/798-9060

An Augusta Original

s s A S

y 2004

Februar

MEN O W R O F

ie Ott r u a L h t i w Chats S p?

S e A e S D • n i k r S e h y Only y Mot ll a M e R g n i y t w u o a r e g Out Is B • e t la o c o of Ch e v o L e h t For

Coming Feb. 5