Metro Spirit 04.22.2004

April 22-28 Vol. 15 No. 38

Bitter Crop

Augusta’s Independent Voice

A slew of investors, some in Augusta, thought they’d found a sweet deal in Sunshine Fresh Produce. Then, things turned sour.

Border Beer Bust April 23-24 • Check Out Page 20

Summer Camp Expo Sunday, April 25 12:30 pm - 6 pm Lower Level Piccadilly Wing

Don’t miss this great opportunity for parents and children to learn more about a variety of summer camps available in the CSRA – from art and music to sports and recreation.

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SIDES MACARONI & CHEESE • GREEN BEANS • TURNIP GREENS FRIED OKRA • BLACK EYED PEAS RICE PILAF • LIMA BEANS BROCCOLI CASSEROLE FRENCH FRIES COLE SLAW • POTATO SALAD ONION RINGS GRAVY • POTATOES W/ GRAVY

Founder George Cunningham circa 1965

9 Area Locations

Augusta’s choice for cancer care.

2001 Preferred hospital for cancer treatment* 2002 Preferred hospital for cancer treatment* 2003 Preferred hospital for cancer treatment*

For the third consecutive year, MCG was chosen by consumers as the preferred hospital for cancer treatment in the annual survey conducted by National Research Corporation.

As the region’s only academic medical center, MCG Medical Center and MCG Children’s Medical Center offer the most comprehensive cancer care in the area. We are nationally recognized for cancer research and innovative diagnostic and treatment procedures. And we are committed to providing community-based health education and prevention programs that improve the lives of children and adults.

Thank you, Augusta, for recognizing MCG as your choice for the best cancer care in the region.

Tomorrow’s Medicine, Here Today.

SM

Medical College of Georgia Health System, Augusta GA

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

*NRC Healthcare Marketing Guide ® 2001–2003

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Contents

METRO SPIRIT ON THE COVER 15 Bitter Crop

By Brian Neill Cover Design: Natalie Holle Cover Photo: Brian Neill

APRIL 22-28 • FREE WEEKLY • METROSPIRIT.COM

FEATURES 20 Border Beer Bust This Weekend By Amy Fennell Christian OPINION 6 Whine Line 6 This Modern World 6 Words 8 Thumbs Up/Down 10 Insider

CINEMA 36 Flix 39 Garner Has Some “Big” Shoes To Fill in “13 Going on 30” 40 “13 Going on 30” Is Mindless, Silly Fluff 41 Reel Time

METRO BEAT 12 Commission Considers $94 Million Arena

MUSIC 42 Comfortable Tunes Characterize Adam Hood 43 Talented Scott Holt Comes to Augusta 44 CD Review 45 Sightings 46 Music by Turner 46 Music Minis 47 After Dark

BITE 24 Mint Julep: The Queen Mother of All Infusions 25 In the Mix ARTS 26 Argentina’s Opus Cuarto To Visit the Marbury Center 27 Massive Art Show at the Aiken Center for the Arts 28 Augusta Players Present “The Wiz” EVENTS 30 Calendar

STUFF 50 News of the Weird 51 Brezsny’s Free Will Astrology 51 New York Times Crossword Puzzle 52 Amy Alkon: Advice Goddess 53 Datemaker 55 Classifieds

EDITOR & PUBLISHER David Vantrease ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Rhonda Jones STAFF WRITERS Stacey Eidson, Brian Neill ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Joe White

PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Smith

ADVERTISING SALES SUPPORT Riali Blackstock, Michelle Dove

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT INTERN Andy Stokes

GRAPHIC ARTISTS Ange Hagler, Natalie Holle, Shawn Sutherland ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Lisa Jordan

39

20

15

ACCOUNTING MANANGER/CLASSIFIEDS Sharon King SENIOR MUSIC CONTRIBUTOR Ed Turner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Amy Alkon, Rob Brezsny, Rachel Deahl, David Elliott, Amy Fennell Christian CARTOONISTS Tom Tomorrow

Metro Spirit is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks of the year. Editorial coverage includes arts, local issues, news, entertainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum.

The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers. Visit us at www.metrospirit.com. Copyright © Metro Spirit, Inc. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited. Phone: (706) 738-1142 Fax: (706) 733-6663 E-mail: spirit@metrospirit.com Letters to the Editor: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, Ga. 30914-3809

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OPINION

Whine Line

A

bout the attempt by Hankerson to appeal for votes from his community by promoting the Bi-Lo store on Deans Bridge Road. Isn’t there a Wal-Mart Super Store a few miles up the road with noticeably cheaper prices? Duuhh.

That’s what big chains and mega-stores like Wal-Mart do!

Hostages and fatwas, suicide and roadside bombs. Man, I sorta wish our sorry enemy in this war had a legitimate freakin’ military — with an Air Force and a Navy too — so we could kick their butts at sea and up in the sky too. There. I said it.

History keeps repeating itself. A long time ago, the Egyptian army was so strong it was impossible to defeat. Yet it was defeated.

Then the Roman army ruled almost all the world, and what seemed impossible happened: The Roman army was defeated. Later on, the German army was so mighty and impossible to defeat, yet they were defeated.

Now the American army is so strong, it seems impossible to defeat. Too bad history keeps repeating itself.

To the gentleman complaining about servers using the word “guy.” I apologize for the offense but I am not from the South and I am not going to start using the word “y’all.” It isn’t used to be offensive. It’s just the same as saying the word y’all. Just like I say “ten” and you guys say “tin”. It’s just how you guys say it.

The public has been second-guessing 9/11 since that fatal day. What ifs are abundant.

Let’s just say that our intelligence network acted on evidence of this plot. We arrest all suspected terrorists involved. Now, all the liberals are shouting, “What about justice, freedom for all, due process of law and what about these peoples’ rights?” Look people: we’ve elected our leaders. Let them perform the jobs that we’ve given them to do.

I wonder how much the local network affiliates pay a staff meteorologist — these weather forecaster guys the local news puts up to

tell us what to expect. Well, however much it is, it’s too much. They aren’t very accurate at all. They couldn’t even get it right for that famous golf thing that was here last week.

None of them were on par for the tuna-mint.

They double bogeyed every day but one that they predicted. It finally rained on Sunday night, so it was all good. Boy, did we need that.

John Kerry is being called the “apparent Democratic nominee” or the “presumptive candidate.” I believe both are inaccurate.

With his obvious flip-flops and waffling, it is hard to define him as anything but a Clinton wannabe. His insane ranting and outrageous proposals are so transparent that a kindergartner could see through them. What I predict is when the convention starts, her highness Hillary will step forward to save the party.

Words “It could, and should, have been a warning that if the intelligence was not good enough to make bombing decisions, it probably was not good enough to make the broad assertion, in public or in formal intelligence documents, that there was ‘no doubt’ Saddam had WMD.” — excerpt from veteran journalist Bob Woodward's new book, “Plan of Attack,” as published in The New York Times.

It seems when some people exercise their right to demonstration it gets little publicity and a thumbs down. As an example, the flag protesters in Atlanta. They are entitled to their right to demonstrate, but if they get ignored it will eventually die down.

Friday. We have even taken our family pet once or twice. If your kids are that afraid of dogs, then leave the little darlings at home.

By the way, how many people have been attacked by those menacing First Friday dogs?

example is the beautiful, yet spacious Broad Street downtown in Rome, Georgia. Their downtown does very well, even though there is a huge mall and other large shopping centers nearby. Let’s imitate success, not experiment with stupid designs.

Through the years when our children took golf lessons, they were required to wear shirts with collars. We were just wondering why Tiger Woods, Jose Olazabal, Charles Howell and Alex Cejka were permitted to play at the Augusta National in collar-less shirts for the tournament? So, does anyone know why they were permitted to play in those shirts, which looked like T-shirts?

Dogs, leashed or unleashed, should be banned from all community activities or gatherings because their toilets are where they happen to be. Show me the dog owner who cleans up after their pets in public. No such person!

There are three things that I notice yearly while vacationing in New England. No stray/abandoned animals running loose, hardly any litter/trash along the roadways and, finally, there is not a church on every corner.

Not so many years ago, a so-called urban architect and planner, I.M. Pei, took what was a very spacious Broad Street and replaced it with too many trees, parking bays that are difficult and dangerous and destroyed one of the best urban streets in the South. The trees are overgrown and unattractive. The Chamber of Commerce palace would get the last place in any contest of design. Now the great expert planners want to remove more parking and replace it with more greenery. If you want more shoppers to come to downtown, let’s get back to the multiple parallel parking we had before — similar to upper Broad Street. Convenient, direct access to the stores and businesses is essential. A good

When columnist Bill Shipp said Georgia’s influence in Congress hovers just above zero, it couldn’t have been said more perfectly. You’d think a congressman that has been in Washington for 10 years such as Charlie Norwood would have some clout. Not Charlie — he’s too busy meddling in local party politics and worrying about his image to win re-election. Norwood and other do-nothing Georgia congressmen like John Lewis and Sanford Bishop could be dumped at the next election and one would never miss them.

There is something about blind loyalty that is akin to being prejudiced. Once you take independent thought out of the equation, that’s the result. I take pride in being an independent voter. I vote for the man, not the party. Where does the thinking go when you blindly support the party?

My family attends First Friday on a regular basis and one of the things we look forward to is the dog parade. We have never encountered a bad-mannered or ill-tempered pet, unlike some of the former patrons of First

To get Senator Joey Brush and Columbia County School Board member Lee Muns to show a little class and retire from the political

6 METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

continued on page 8

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Thumbs Up

To the Richmond County Sheriff's Department investigators for moving swiftly to arrest a suspect in the murder of 29-year-old Tamara Dunstan, who was three months pregnant. Just three days after she was first reported missing,

25-year-old Ronald Francis Burke was taken into custody.

Authorities said that after initial questioning, Burke admitted to the crime and led investigators to Dunstan's body in a shallow grave.

Thumbs Down

A Nevada mother is suing the Coors brewing company because her 19-year-old son drove drunk into a light pole at 90 miles per hour, according to the Associated Press.

The lawsuit accused Coors of "glorifying a culture of youth, sex and glamour while hiding the dangers of alcohol abuse and addiction," according to the story.

The woman, Jodie Pisco, also sued her son's girlfriend for allowing her son to get into the car, and the girlfriend's mother, who had given the car to her daughter.

Pisco forgot to sue the car manufacturer for enabling her son to drive. She should also sue herself for giving birth to someone stupid enough to drive drunk into a telephone pole at 90 mph.

continued from page 6 scene is like trying to get a couple of pigs to wear bibs!

Israel does not mess around! They get results.

We should give Israel the contract on bin Laden!

Had the U.S. given Israel the contract on Iraq, this whole mess would’ve been over with the first time! A second conflict would not have been necessary.

Despicable! I cannot believe what I just saw.

I’m flipping the channels trying to find the latest information on a local missing woman. Truly a tragic and heart-wrenching local story, and here’s WRDW-12 with a promo bragging about how they were the first to bring you the breaking news.

To the blue-eyed, blonde-haired white person who is worried about “white people” becoming the minority in 50 years, get over it. It’s too late.

The train has left the station. You can’t stop it.

Hispanics, blacks and other minorities will become the majority, and it won’t be 50 years from now. I know you must be scared of that thought, since you will then be the whipping boy. But don’t fret — we’ll treat you just as well as you have treated us.

It seems a crying shame to have an auditorium for the Columbia County commissioners to hold meetings since it is evident the outcome is already decided. Evidence: Rhinehart’s restaurant versus neighbors.

My whine is about conflicting things going on.

It is really strange that the guy who won the

“Apprentice” position on TV makes less than Charles Larke. I guess we need to get our own TV show and have contestants bid on Charles Larke’s job so we can get a lesser-paid guy that would probably do a good or better job than him.

I can’t believe Bob Young did not get into any of the snapshots at his Master’s reception.

Perhaps he was just too busy slamming the doors at the citizens and patting the backs of his other RDC board members as they take away another 30+ jobs, $600,000 of income from the Augusta area. Oh well, he is supposed to care about the economic development? What he cares about is supporting a company based in Florida. Way to go, Bob. Remember too, one day you will be old.

This is in response to the knucklehead who said Regency Mall had a bad location. Bad location didn’t have anything to do with Regency Mall going under. What had a lot to do with it was the fact that crime picked up at the mall and we had a girl killed in the parking lot and a body found in a wooded area. Decent people didn’t feel safe at Regency Mall so, therefore, they didn’t go. I know, I remember. I remember seeing gangs running through Regency Mall scaring people trying to shop.

Call our Whine Line at 510-2051 and leave your comments. We won’t use your name. Fax your whines by dialing (706) 733-6663 or e-mail your whines to whine@metrospirit.com.

TEAMS NEEDED! Please join us for the CSRA’s biggest block party of the year on

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• What to team members do when they aren’t on the track?

Bring tents, sleeping bags, and food to cook on the grill and get ready to enjoy the music and entertainment throughout the night and next morning.

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Insider

Will Run Against

ormer Augusta Commissioner J.B. Powell has told Metro Spirit that he will qualify next week to run for the District 23 state senate seat.

After weeks of speculation, Powell acknowledged that he is running against state Sen. Randy Hall. Powell is a Democrat; Hall is a Republican. The two will face off in November.

After redistricting earlier this year, former District 23 state Sen. Don Cheeks was drawn out of his district and placed in Hall’s District 22. Hall was shifted to District 23. Hall got into the state senate by barely defeating longtime political boss Charles Walker in J.B. Powell 2002. Cheeks, formerly a Democrat, switched to the Republican party last year. Cheeks will face the winner of the District 22 Democratic primary race between former state Sen. Charles Walker and local attorney Ed Tarver.

Hall will face a formidable opponent.

Powell is a good campaigner and a skilled politician.

He was masterful in flexing his political muscle while serving on the commission and became adept at working with black and white commissioners to accomplish his goals and the goals Randy Hall of his district. He became the “go to” guy as far as dealmaking was concerned.

Powell is well-liked and respected by southside insiders who encouraged him to run. Many voters in south Augusta don’t think Hall will represent them like they want. First, Hall hails from the west side and southsiders are suspicious of west Augusta politicians. And, while Hall represented District 22, a majority AfricanAmerican district, his voting record upset a lot of people in the majority white, conservative 23rd District. Specifically, Hall’s position on the Confederate flag angered white flaggers. While in his first term, Hall was voting to represent the constituents in his old district. Now he faces an entirely different constituency.

Hall is wading into a district where Powell has a lot of friends. Powell served his constituents well while on the commission and he has continued to have a political presence over the four plus years he’s been out of office.

Political insiders report that former Richmond County Sheriff Charlie Webster is a staunch supporter of Powell, along with several southside pols, many of whom generally vote Republican but will likely support Powell this year.

Powell has been further encouraged to run by Democrats statewide, including Lt. Gov. Mark Taylor and various legislators. Dems are pushing to win back the majority in the state senate that was lost after the 2002 election. They would like nothing better than to take back District 23, lost when Cheeks switched from the Democratic party to the Republican party. They have visions of defeating Hall in District 23, while Walker takes out Cheeks in District 22.

Two Republicans gone.

While Powell has a lot going for him, Hall is still the incumbent. He has done an admirable job in his first two years in office. He is honest, intelligent, well-liked and will have strong support from his Republican friends statewide, from the governor down to local party officials.

They will, no doubt, go after Powell with a vengeance. More later.

Switching Parties?

Reliable sources report that when District Attorney Danny Craig qualifies to run for reelection next week, he will do so as a Republican. The long-time Democrat has been talking with local Republicans about the switch for some Danny Craig time and rumors about the possibility have run rampant. His friends cautioned him not to announce the switch until the last minute in order to prevent a challenger from running as a Democrat. Will he switch? We’ll know for sure next week.

The views expressed in this column are the views of The Insider and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004 11

METRO BEAT

Commission

Commission Considers $94 Million Arena

T

12

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

he proposal for the city of Augusta to fully fund the construction of a $94 million sports arena at Regency Mall is officially on the table.

On April 20, Augusta Entertainment LLC — a private company formed by local businessmen William S. Morris III and Frank Lawrence — presented the Augusta Commission with a document entitled a “memorandum of understanding” outlining the specific details of the company’s 30-year proposal.

Paul Simon, spokesperson for Augusta Entertainment, explained to commissioners that in order for the arena to be built, the city would have to agree to commit $60 million of future special purpose local option sales tax funds to the project and underwrite $24 million in excise tax bonds and $10 million in revenue bonds.

It is proposed that the $24 million in revenue bonds will be repaid from the city’s hotel-motel and alcohol taxes, which are presently being used to fund the current downtown civic center and pay the outstanding $6 million debt service on that facility.

Simon also explained that the $10 million that Augusta Entertainment has requested the city to back in revenue bonds will be repaid by revenue generated by the operations of the proposed arena.

In exchange for the city’s commitment of $94 million to this project, Augusta Entertainment would agree to manage the development, construction and operations of the arena.

This agreement also suggested that the city would turn over the operations of the facility to Augusta Entertainment for 30 years.

If the plan is approved, Augusta Entertainment is expected to contract with the private company, ScheerGame Sports Development, LLC from Jacksonville, Fla., to manage the new arena.

With so much money at stake, several commissioners said they needed a lot more time before they even considered Augusta Entertainment’s proposal.

“I don’t think you’re going to get a vote today,” Augusta Mayor Bob Young told Simon.

Mayor Pro Tem Willie Mays agreed, pointing out that the final decision will be made by the voters when they consider approving the next phase of the city’s sales tax later this year.

“If the people of this community want it, they’ll vote for it. But I just think they need to know all the numbers,” Mays said. “They need to know how this is going to be set up, what it’s going to cost, and then they’ll make the decision.”

Mays said it is important for Simon and the city to present voters with a

By Stacey Eidson

invest in the company.

Augusta Entertainment, the company which owns the Augusta Lynx hockey team, is offering the public the opportunity to buy shares in the company at $1,000 a unit, with the goal of raising $2.4 million.

That money is proposed to pay off the $1 million loan Augusta Entertainment used to purchase the hockey team and fund approximately three years of the company’s operations.

Augusta Entertainment has already filed documents with the Securities

Willie Mays

“When you really look at those numbers, I’ve all along said that this will be closer to $100 million. And I think the public needs to be aware of that.”

— Mayor Pro Tem Willie Mays

clear picture of the project’s total cost, including the demolition of the current civic center and the payment of that facility’s existing debt.

“When you really look at those numbers, I’ve all along said that this will be closer to $100 million,” Mays said.

“And I think the public needs to be aware of that.”

Simon said that Augusta Entertainment is doing all it can to get as much information out to the public as possible because, not only does he want voters to support the arena, but he’s also hoping that citizens will

and Exchange Commission in order to allow the company to sell shares to the public.

However, buying shares in Augusta Entertainment does not mean investors would own the new civic arena, Simon said. The new $94 million arena would solely be owned by the city of Augusta, because only public funds are being suggested to build the facility.

The purpose of Augusta Entertainment selling shares in the corporation is so that the company will be owned by many, instead of a few, Simon said.

In fact, Morris and Lawrence plan to invest only $150,000 each in the company in order to retain a total of 10 percent of the corporation.

“We went out, meeting with the community, to sell securities in this corporation because we don’t want it to be a one-man ownership,” Simon told commissioners. “We want it to be owned by anybody who wants interest in it throughout the county.

“I’ve gotten responses from about 200 people who are interested in investing.

But I think there are a lot more.”

Not only is buying shares in Augusta Entertainment an opportunity for the public to invest in the city’s future, Simon said, but he also believes that over the proposed 30-year term of this agreement with the city, supporting this corporation would be a profitable venture for shareholders.

“We think the investors can make money,” Simon said. “I can’t guarantee that. I don’t want to go to jail like Martha Stewart, but what I’m saying is, we think it can profitable over the term of this lease for the investor.”

Augusta Commissioner Marion Williams said he hoped citizens investing in the project would make a profit, but he was more interested in how the city would fare in the deal.

“The proposal is that we would share the profits of the arena,” Simon told Williams. “Once we determine what the profits are, then they will be split.

We would take one-third profit to go against those (revenue) bonds. Then one-third goes to the county and onethird goes to Augusta Entertainment.”

Simon was unable to forecast what kind of profit the arena could expect, but he did have an announcement about what Morris intends to do with any money he makes through Augusta Entertainment.

“Billy Morris has said he wants to make sure that everybody understands that his profits will be given to a charity,” Simon said. “He doesn’t want to make any money. He wants this for the community.”

Augusta Entertainment is to be led by a board of directors that will eventually be elected by the corporation’s shareholders, but the company has already established what Simon called a continued on page 14

Get to the heart of the matter.

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continued from page 12 “beginning board” consisting of an interesting cast of seven community leaders.

“The beginning board, to start with, will be made up of Billy Morris, Frank Lawrence, a representative from ScheerGame, myself (Simon) which is four, James Kendrick is five, (Rev.) Otis Moss is six, and (former Augusta Mayor) Larry Sconyers is seven,” Simon told the commission. “That’s a seven-man board. Then this document offers you, as a commission, the opportunity to select two people to be placed on that board.”

Augusta Commissioner Jimmy Smith commended Simon on Augusta Entertainment’s vision to enhance economic development in south Augusta, particularly the former Regency Mall site.

“We’ve been working out there for 13 years since the mall closed, trying to turn the place around,” Smith said.

“And I believe this is the first time that somebody has come along with a plan that could work.”

Simon also informed commissioners that Augusta Entertainment conducted a survey in all eight of the city’s commission districts to find out whether citizens supported building a new arena.

“Let me just read one question of this scientific survey which was done by experts,” Simon said. “Question No. 8 was: If the new arena can be built without raising taxes, would you say you were in favor or not in favor of it being built? The answer to that ... was a total of 73.38 percent in favor. So, I think people really do support this project.”

Augusta Commissioner Andy Cheek said, while Simon’s survey sounded impressive, he would have asked the public a different question.

“A lot of people are supportive of this in south Augusta,” Cheek said. “But when asked the question, ‘Is it more important than your drainage problems?’ The answer is, ‘No, it’s not.’”

Cheek said the public has made it clear to commissioners that improvements in the city’s infrastructure should be the No. 1 priority when creating the sales tax list.

If the commission was to include all of the proposed community projects, such as the civic arena and performing arts center, as well as most of the city’s infrastructure needs, Cheek said the sales tax would be tied up for the next 10 years.

“And 10 years is a long time,” Cheek said. “I challenge any of my colleagues to go to their neighborhood and say, ‘In 2014, we are going to start on your park. ... In 2014, we are going to build that fire station we promised you two years ago.’ Then, let’s see what the public has to say.”

Commissioners told Simon that they

would establish a future work session to fully discuss Augusta Entertainment’s proposal and that in all likelihood, even though Simon said he would prefer to have the sales tax referendum on a July ballot, that vote will probably occur later in the fall.

“I think we might be barbecuing in July, but we won’t be voting,” Mays said.

Before the commission concluded its discussion, Augusta Commissioner Marion Williams asked Simon whether he supported having citizens consider a one-ballot or a multiple-ballot question regarding the upcoming extension of the sales tax.

Earlier this year, a citizen’s sales tax committee suggested to the commission that the city break out various community projects such as the arena on the upcoming sales tax ballot in order to give voters a choice.

In a previous sales tax meeting on April 15, City Attorney Steve Shepard recommended that the city entertain only a one-ballot question that included all of the proposed sales tax projects, even though Columbus, Ga., had a multiple-ballot vote several years ago that gave citizens the option of selecting which projects they supported.

“My most conservative, most safe opinion is a single-ballot question,” Shepard said, explaining that a multiple ballot could face a legal challenge in court. “I understand what may be legal may have political problems, but if it’s political and has legal problems, we are not going to get anywhere.”

Simon agreed with Shepard’s assessment of the situation.

“We think it’s required by law to do one ballot,” Simon said. “If you go with two ballots, you run the risk of the whole thing being upset by some disgruntled citizen who could file a lawsuit against the city.”

Mays told Simon that Augusta Entertainment should be more confident that the arena would pass even on a multiple ballot.

“If 70-something percent of the people are in favor of what you are doing, then if I were you, I would probably want mine on a separate ballot,” Mays said. “Yours might be the only one that passes.”

After all, Mays said, if Morris and Lawrence have agreed to invest a total of $300,000 toward Augusta Entertainment and plan on getting $94 million in return from the city to construct the arena, luck must definitely be on their side.

“With all due respect, y’all made an investment, that’s true. But you’ve got to admit, the odds of you investing $300,000 with the chance of getting $90 million back ain’t bad,” Mays said, laughing. “That’s better odds than a man getting a Lotto ticket every day of the year.”

Bitter Crop A slew of investors, some in Augusta, thought they’d found a sweet deal in Sunshine Fresh Produce. Then, things turned sour.

By Brian Neill

D

eborah Burns thought she knew Dennis Willingham pretty well.

They both grew up attending Mount Moriah Baptist Church in Augusta and even shared a Thanksgiving dinner a time or two, owing to the fact Burns had known Willingham’s family for roughly 20 years.

That’s why, when Willingham allegedly approached Burns with an investment scheme that sounded too good to be true, she dove in with enthusiasm — and $30,000.

Now, Burns says she’s doubtful she’ll ever see most of that money again.

At the very least, she hopes to find justice, along with some answers.

“I really want to know why he took my money, why he took other people’s money and why he hurt people,” Burns said. “Because he wasn’t raised that way.”

Burns said it was around May of 1998 that she first spoke to Willingham about an investment plan involving, of all things, strawberries.

Willingham had previously moved to California from Augusta and married a woman named Brenda, who made her living growing strawberries in Oxnard, in a region dubbed the “Strawberry Coast.”

According to Burns, Willingham promised to double her money through investing in his and Brenda’s strawberryfarming company, Sunshine Fresh Produce.

Burns, 50, still has the faxed promissory note, bearing what appears to be Dennis Willingam’s signature and outlining the rewards she was to reap from her first $5,000 invested in the strawberry growing and brokering business.

Beginning in August of 1998, according to the document, Burns was to receive $2,500. Then, every three months until May 11, 1999, she’d get another $2,500, for a total of $10,000.

Another promissory note, dated Sept. 28, 1998, and bearing what appears to be both of the Willinghams’ signatures, promised to pay Burns $20,000 in $5,000 quarterly payments in return for an unspecified amount of loaned money.

For Burns, the pay-off from investing with the Willinghams seemed sweeter than the plumpest, juiciest berry.

And pay it did — in cash, Burns recalled.

“They paid cash money. They sent it FedEx, cash money,” Burns said. “If they (told) you the money’s coming at 10 o’clock, it came.”

FROM SWEET TO SOUR As the cash continued to arrive, Burns thought she had landed on a great thing. Burns had recently received a substantial amount of insurance money, the result of a bout with thyroid cancer.

She decided to invest it.

Wanting to share the wealth with her family, Burns also encouraged her mother, daughter and an aunt to send the Willinghams money, she said.

Like clockwork, the money flowed in, and Burns and her family all thought they had found a sweet deal in Sunshine Fresh Produce.

Then, sometime around 2001, the cash-filled FedEx packages stopped coming, Burns recalled.

And the Willinghams, Burns said, could no longer be reached.

“I was going to go one time, out there (to California),” Burns said. “And my family kind of talked me out of it because I was very mad. You know, they had stopped taking our phone calls and wouldn’t return our phone calls and they were not giving us our money.”

Brenda and Dennis Willingham were arrested in December 2003 by the California Bureau of Investigation’s Major Fraud Unit, according to the Ventura County District Attorney’s Office.

They each face 37 felony counts of selling unqualified securities, 35 counts of selling securities by misrepresentation or factual omission and one count of grand theft, according to the Ventura County D.A.’s office.

Brenda Willingham, according to the D.A.’s office, also faces an additional charge of failing to obey a desist and refrain order from the California Department of Corporations, directing her to stop selling shares in the strawberry company.

Both have pleaded not-guilty to the charges against them and have offered publicized accounts of how poor weather and market conditions caused their strawberry business to tank, making it impossible to pay back investors.

Since their arrests, the Willinghams have been held in the Ventura County jail. Although their bail was originally set at $2 million apiece, a Ventura County jail official confirmed their bonds are now $250,000.

Prosecutors also have reserved the right to review any potential bond sources to ensure none of the money is illgotten, said Eric Dobroth, the Ventura County assistant district attorney handling the case. continued on page 16

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004 15

Photos Brian Neill

continued from page 15 Dobroth called the Willingham case “one of the biggest security fraud cases that we’ve ever dealt with in this county.”

The prosecutor said it also differed from the norm.

“You know, a lot of times you’ll see guys who just make sham companies up ... There’s really no company,” Dobroth said. “Well in this case, there was a company. So it gives the air of legitimacy. However, no one got paid any money — where’d it all go? And at the same time, we’re seeing them (the Willinghams) driving new cars and doing all kinds of fancy stuff.”

That fancy stuff, Dobroth said, included a house in Ventura County worth close to $1 million and a number of gambling trips the couple took to Las Vegas.

The Willinghams face a preliminary hearing in the case on May 24, Dobroth said.

Neither Philip Capritto, the attorney representing Brenda Willingham, nor Dennis Willingham’s attorney, Karen Beecher of the Ventura County Public Defender’s Office, returned phone calls seeking comment.

Anson Whitfield, an attorney who represented the couple in a related bankruptcy case, also did not return a phone call seeking comment.

The Willinghams filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy in Ventura County in November 2001.

Dobroth said the couple claimed indebtedness to more than 600 unsecured creditors for an amount in excess of $30 million.

“What happened was, they made all these promises to pay these individuals. They didn’t pay them. Certain people got tired of waiting and tired of the promises and sued them,” Dobroth said. “And then they had a whole bunch of lawsuits filed against them, so they decided to declare bankruptcy.”

In January, however, the United States Trustee dismissed the couple’s bankruptcy claim, leaving them open to their creditors.

Dobroth suggested that the monetary amount of the Willinghams’ bankruptcy claim had likely been based on pay-outs they promised to investors as opposed to actual dollar amounts the couple collected.

“Granted, I’m guessing some of that is going to be the inflated amount,” Dobroth said. “For example, you put in $20,000, they promise you $40,000. So they’re probably putting in the $40,000 as opposed to the $20,000 in the bankruptcy papers just to be on the safe side.”

going on, you know, ‘You give me $15,000, I’ll give you $30,000 in two weeks.’

“You know, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is too good to be true. And that’s kind of what was going on here.”

CROOKED, UNSAVVY OR BOTH? Dobroth said there are other individuals aside from Burns in Augusta who claim they were scammed by Dennis and Brenda Willingham, but he declined to name them at this time.

Gary Willingham said he spoke with investigators from California when they came to Augusta after his brother’s arrest and acknowledged that his own wife, Eleanor, had invested in Sunshine Fresh Produce, but did so without his knowledge.

Investigators asked Gary Willingham about a large sum of unaccounted for money, he said.

“He (the investigator) said, ‘We can account for everything except for about $26 million.’

Well, I don’t know. I don’t have it,” Gary Willingham said. “He (Dennis Willingham) never gave me any money to stash or put aside.

And I think if he knew, if Dennis had knowledge of some money, he wouldn’t be sitting up there in jail suffering.”

Gary Willingham said investigators also wondered how his mother, who had worked as an Equal Opportunity Agency community service worker for 37 years, could afford an expensive house in Westlake.

Gary Willingham said he built the house himself, using hired help and experience he gained as a licensed contractor.

He said his family also has received numerous royalties over the years for music Photo courtesy of Matt McClain/Ventura County Star recorded by his father, the late Rev. Ruben Willingham, who formed a group of gospel singers called the Swanee Quintet roughly 60 years ago.

Alan Freeman, owner of Atlanta International Records, which owns the rights to the majority of Swanee Quintet recordings still sold, said he was skeptical that Gary Willingham still gets any significant royalties Robert Garcia, a former International Boxing Federation from the group’s music. lightweight champion, also claimed he invested $25,000 with “There’s probably very limited material out there by them, the Willinghams and expected to receive $75,000 in return, the and what material there is, is probably through me,” Freeman Star reported. said.

Burns said she was expecting to make back about $100,000 However, Freeman did say that Gary Willingham has been from her investment with the Willinghams. heavily involved in the music industry over the years and has She estimated she only got back about $10,000 of the total brokered deals with and recorded albums for a number of $30,000 she invested. artists.

Burns said her mother was able to recoup some of her money “I had an artist, Tommy Ellison and the Five Singing Stars, through hiring an attorney. Burns was unsure of the total who, in between contracts with me, recorded a record with amounts her mother and daughter invested. him,” Freeman said. “And I ended up re-signing Tommy and Gary Willingham, Dennis’ brother who lives in Augusta, also bought the master from Gary. So Gary is out there and has has read the accounts that paint Brenda and Dennis recorded a lot of records over the years by some very signifiWillingham as opportunists who ripped off investors. cant, traditional artists, probably the Swanees at some point However, he has a hard time swallowing the argument that and Tommy (Ellison) and a couple of others. investors were victims.

“He’s put enough records out there where I’m sure he’s Gary Willingham suggested that people investing such large somehow or another making some money off that work.” sums of money should have taken measures to ensure their Gary Willingham said he now works as a grant writer for investments were secure. non-profits and also has a contracting business.

“Nobody did that. So everybody knew something wasn’t “So, we’re not being supported by Dennis in any way,” right in the milk,” Gary Willingham said during an interview at Gary Willingham said. “It’s just not being done.” the Metro Spirit offices. “Every one of them. Why didn’t they Gary Willingham said his brother was in the U.S. Navy come forward when there were better days? Why now? prior to moving to the California area roughly 15 years ago. It “Everybody (was) looking for quick cash, tax-free.” was there that he met and married Brenda and began helping Dobroth acknowledged that, if nothing else, investors in the her build up the strawberry business, he said.

Willinghams’ business probably weren’t the most rational “What gave Dennis the resources to partner with Brenda bunch. was that he was working in a steel company and injured “They (the Willinghams) were saying essentially, ‘You give himself on the job and received a sizeable workman’s me $20,000 to grow strawberries on this property, I guarantee compensation,” Gary Willingham said. “So he had the you that in one year, I’ll give you $40,000,” Dobroth said. “Or resources to inject into Brenda’s business to help take that you know, sometimes there’s these special deals they had business to another level.” continued on page 18

Brenda and Dennis Willingham shown leaving a meeting of bankruptcy creditors in April of 2002 in Santa Barbara.

16

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

“IF IT SOUNDS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ...”

A dozen or so stories in the Ventura County Star over the past few years have detailed how the Willinghams allegedly duped investors out of thousands of dollars.

One story in the newspaper gave the account of how a woman who had known Brenda Willingham since high school had invested in the couple’s strawberry business with money she received from a disability settlement after being diagnosed with a brain tumor.

Like Burns, the woman told the newspaper that the Willinghams eventually stopped returning her phone calls.

The list goes on.

Those among the published accounts from supposed victims of the scheme who filed suit against the Willinghams is a former insurance claims adjuster turned senior pro tour golfer, who claimed the couple bilked him out of $100,000, as well as two boxers — one being Fernando Vargas, who fought a failed bout with Oscar De La Hoya in a super welterweight match in 2002.

Vargas, the Star reported, had invested $200,000 with the Willinghams and expected to get back $560,000, at a rate of $20,000 a month, within roughly a year and a half.

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continued from page 16 For awhile, Gary Willingham said, Sunshine Fresh Produce did quite well, gaining some lucrative contracts with jam and jelly companies and supplying the California prisons system.

A spokesperson with the California Department of Corrections, however, could not find any record of contracting with Sunshine Fresh Produce or Willingham Farms, another name under which the couple operated.

Gary Willingham said a series of droughts and bad weather leading up to 2001 got Brenda and Dennis Willingham into trouble.

“And then if you’ve got debt service mounting up, month by month ... then you’ve got liability versus income and you come out with a bottom line,” Gary Willingham said. “Well now the bottom line is negative.

“It’s just unsophisticated business management that got them in a bind.”

Gary Willingham said he thinks the couple turned to the wrong places for help.

“I think they may have looked for some non-conventional funding sources,” Gary Willingham said.

One of those sources that Gary Willingham said he feels should receive more scrutiny is Robert Caron, a California attorney who served as president of an investment company called Transglobal Funding, and invested heavily in the Willinghams’ business.

Caron, according to a 2001 story in the Pacific Coast Business Times, was at the center of several fraud investigations and was linked to an Orange County investment firm that was suspected of running a Ponzi scheme, whereby money from newly gained investors is used to pay off earlier investors to keep the operation running.

Dobroth said that, to his knowledge, Caron was never arrested or indicted for any of the related activities.

In the Business Times article, an assistant U.S. attorney in Texas who prosecuted members of the

Ponzi scheme raised the question of whether Caron “was a true victim” of those involved, “or a cohort and co-conspirator.”

It was allegedly through Caron that the boxers, Garcia and Vargas, initiated their investments in the Willinghams’ business, according to a story in the Star.

Caron also was one of the creditors who sued the Willinghams, reportedly claiming he was owed more than $3 million by them.

“That seems to be a pattern for this guy (Caron),” Gary Willingham said. “And it just seems so unfair that the prosecutors have not focused on him.”

Caron did not return a call seeking comment about the case or his involvement with the Willinghams.

Dobroth said he would be legally prevented from commenting on whether Caron was under investigation at this time, even if that was the case.

Gary Willingham said he feels certain his brother did not intentionally set out to defraud people.

“I’m sure that the integrity and the character of Dennis is not one that would facilitate a criminal enterprise, as has been depicted,” Gary Willingham said. “He’s my younger brother and I’ve known him to be the type of person that doesn’t have that criminal disposition.

“I think everybody was ignorant, because they didn’t have the business savvy.”

But regardless of how or why, Burns says she feels betrayed and looks forward to the day when Brenda and Dennis Willingham come before a court of law.

“He’s (Dennis Willingham) a fast talker, and, you know, they wanted to be rich,” Burns said. “There ain’t nothing wrong with wanting to be rich, but I just think when you go by the wrong ways, God isn’t going to bless you. You don’t just go out there and start ripping people off.

“I am very angry, because they took our money.”

Photo: Brian Neill

“I’m sure that the integrity and the character of Dennis is not one that would facilitate a criminal enterprise, as has been depicted” — Gary Willingham

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Border Beer Bust This Weekend Microbrews Take Center Stage

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aducah, Ken., resident Kane Roberts is the beer manager at Roof Brothers, where he oversees a stock of more than 400 brews that garnered the business status as one of the top 79 beer retailers in the world by All About Beer magazine.

He spends his spare time traveling across the U.S., visiting breweries, talking to brewers and tasting their products. He rates beer on www.beeradvocate.com.

Roberts, Kentucky’s reigning aletasting champion, attends every beer festival he possibly can and every once in a while — like this weekend at the Border Beer Bust — he gets to act as judge.

Yeah, it’s a tough job, but somebody’s gotta do it, so Roberts figures that it might as well be someone who loves beer as much as he does.

“I’ve always liked beer,” Roberts said in the understatement of the year. “I’m one of those people who will walk into a Budweiser plant and inhale deeply because I just like the smell. I’m kind of crazy like that.”

Beer as a profession is something Roberts fell into while studying to be an electrician. He is, in fact, a certified electrician, but admits that, given a family history in the alcohol industry going back to his great grandfather, his current profession is a much better fit. It is also a family connection that brings him to Augusta’s first annual beer festival — his cousin Tres Watson is organizing the event.

“It’s kind of a family operation here,” Roberts explained. “He’s the financial side of it and I’m the

brewery side. We stick to our sides and do pretty good.”

The Border Beer Bust will be held this Friday and Saturday at Riverwalk near the 8th Street Commons. Anyone can attend and admission is free. To sample the more than 100 craft brews available at the festival, though, visitors will purchase a commemorative mug and three tasting tickets — good at any brewer’s table — for $10. Additional tasting tickets are $1 each.

So while most festival attendees will spend their time sampling ales, lagers, porters and wheat beers (among others) — as well as talking to brewers, listening to live local music and maybe having a bite to eat — Roberts, as head judge, will be behind the scenes making sure everything goes according to plan.

He’s already been working with breweries and distributors and setting up the 14 categories of competition.

Friday, he said, will be spent coordinating the judges with the styles of beer they’ll be judging. The judging will take place Friday afternoon and into the evening and Roberts will tabulate the scores in time for the medals ceremony Saturday afternoon. “That way,” he said, “people can go try them (the winning beers) and see if they agree with us or if they think we’re full of it.”

How, exactly, does this sort of competition work, we asked him.

Roberts said beers in each category will be judged according to four criteria: Appearance (Is the color appropriate to the style? Is there anything floating in it?), aroma (Can the judge smell the individual malts continued on page 22

Microbrews

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Continuous Country Favorites

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continued from page 20 and hops used in the beer?), body (Is the texture of the beer appropriate to the category?) and taste (Can you get this one on your own?). In that order.

“You don’t want a stout that’s light and watery and you don’t want a pilsner to be heavy and thick,” Roberts explained. “You’ve got to know the style and know what the style is supposed to taste like and the one that does that best is obviously the winner.”

Don’t feel too sorry for Roberts, though, who said he’ll spend most of Saturday hanging out at the festival, listening to music and talking to brewers. Even if you’re not a beer aficionado, he said, talking to the brewers is the most effective way to find a craft beer for you.

“The best way to do it is ask someone,” he said. “Tell them what you normally like to drink.”

If, for instance, you love coffee and chocolate, a porter might be the beer for you. If you’re a Canadian whiskey lover, a smoother, sweeter beer like a lager or a brown ale might be more to your tastes.

“You kind of have to know what you like already and then you can

start moving into other styles,” Roberts said. “You don’t want to jump too far out of the norm for yourself, but the whole point is that you never know until you try.”

Don’t be afraid to talk to the brewers, he advised. After all, that’s what they’re there for and their creations are often their favorite topics of conversation.

“Most of these guys, you’ll find, are friendly, friendly people,” Roberts said. “Ask them questions. Ask them why they decided to brew beer and I’m sure most of these guys will come up with a good story to tell.”

And even though Roberts considers this year’s festival a warm-up of sorts for next year, when more craft breweries will be able to participate after Georgia ups the alcohol content in beer from six to 14 percent, he says that the over 100 beers participating this weekend provide a nice selection for novice and experienced beer drinkers alike.

“It’s just a nice, nice collection of beers,” he said. “It will be a nice treat for people who don’t have too much experience with craft beer.”

Border Beer Bust If you missed it last week, here’s everything you need to know about the Border Beer Bust.

When: Friday, April 23, from 4-9 p.m. & Saturday, April 24, from 1-9 p.m.

Where: Riverwalk near the 8th Street Commons.

Benefits: The Knights of Columbus building fund.

How it works: There is no admission to the festival, but if you’d like to taste the craft brews, here’s how it works. $10 will get you a commemorative mug, a wristband and three tasting tickets good at any table under the craft brew tent. Each ticket will get you between 3 and 3 1⁄2 ounces of the beer you choose. Further tasting tickets will cost you $1 apiece.

Beer garden: Under a separate tent, patrons can shop, eat and purchase full-size Budweiser products (you must stay in the beer garden with full-size beers, however). Non-alcoholic beverages will also be available.

Extras: Continuous live, local music.

Friday 4:30-6:00 - TBA 6:30-8:30 - Rhes Reeves Saturday 1:30-3:30 - Air Apparent 4:00-6:00 - Louie and the Bandits 6:30-8:30 - The Reverend Jimmy Landry

Food T-Bonz Pork Chops Silla Cafe Hot Foods by Calvin Villa Europa

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

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BITE Mint Julep: The Queen Mother of All Infusions

I

t is time-consuming to “rear” one. It can also be expensive — a fifth of bourbon (no blends, no sour mashes) only yields eight. And there are many, many rules to follow when building and drinking

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

one.

But the Mint Julep — an unlikely marriage of mint and bourbon — is, by far, the most singularly Southern drink there is. And with Derby Day right around the corner, drinking at least one is not only advised, it is mandatory.

Those who love them, such as reigning Augusta julepist Harry Vaiden, can’t help but speak of them with (dare I say it?) a fervor usually reserved for women and religion. Those who detest them, Vaiden says, have probably gotten ahold of one of the many horrors masquerading as julep recipes.

Made correctly, a julep is subtly sweet, refreshingly cold and deceptively mild. It almost certainly, Vaiden says, originated in the South, circa the 1800s, as a way for people to keep cool. As for the rest of its history, much is uncertain.

“As far as we know, they evolved in the South,” Vaiden explains. “It’s a drink with a lot of crushed ice in it and since there was no air conditioning in the South, it was a natural way for people to keep cool.”

Vaiden continues that they probably did originate in Kentucky, but, over the years, two distinctly different recipes have evolved: the Kentucky Julep — which starts with a mint-infused simple syrup to which bartenders add the bourbon — and the Georgia Julep — in which the bruised mint leaves steep directly in the bourbon.

Vaiden’s own recipe was handed down to him from former neighbor and local Mint Julep king for many years, the late Joseph B. Cumming. As a young man, Vaiden often witnessed the spring and summer ritual of Cumming’s julep parties, in which the guests were welldressed and the waiters were in white coats. Curious, the young Vaiden finally asked Cumming to tell him more.

So the next Sunday, Vaiden and his father — properly attired, of course — learned how to make a Georgia Julep. Cumming eventually shared his recipe with Vaiden, a recipe he didn’t even give to family members.

Since then, its reputation has grown through Vaiden’s julep parties and his generosity in sharing it with the likes of the Augusta Historical Society, who serves his recipe at their annual Cotton Ball.

And though he is on the board of the Augusta Training Shop for the Handicapped, which benefits from the annual Derby Day events, guests there will sip a Kentucky-style julep.

“That’s about as good as you can do when you’re

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By Amy Fennell Christian

Kentucky Colonel mint — The only mint to make a julep with, this particular type is available locally at Bedford Greenhouses or Green Thumb West. Best grown in a terra cotta pot.

Sweeten — Adding more of the “tea” to a julep about a half hour after sipping one.

A Few Rules • Julep cups are a must. “Two things you don’t want to make it in is glass or plastic,” Vaiden explains. “A tin cup would be better than that.” Cups can be difficult to find, he continues, unless you look in antique shops or on eBay. The same goes for sippers. Tiffany’s is the only place Vaiden knows of that still makes them.

• Always hold the cup by the upper rim, so as not to disturb the frost that forms on the cup.

• Drink juleps in the right setting, which, according to Vaiden, can be “on porches or out in the garden, as is fitting, but not inside.”

• Sip slowly. “Someone once said, ‘There’s a thousand words in each one if you drink it properly’ because you’re supposed to sip it,” he explains. “You should drink the last bit of liquid with the last bit of ice.”

• Dress the part. Dresses, sport coats and ties are de rigueur at a julep party.

serving thousands of people,” he says of the version they serve at Churchill Downs. “And we can’t really serve my julep (at Derby Day). We’ll serve one more like what you get at the Derby.”

So what, exactly, is the lure of the julep?

“It’s a courtly drink,” Vaiden explains. “How many drinks do you know of that you drink out of a silver cup with a silver sipper? To an old Southerner, it’s a way of life. We’ve seen so many traditions pass away, we want to claim the traditions that are left.”

And just how great is his love for the julep?

“I don’t know if it’s the zenith,” he laughs. “It might be the second zenith, but we won’t go into that.”

Mint Juleps: The Lingo Rear — The process of infusing mint leaves and bourbon and letting it steep like tea for a day or two.

Build — The process of putting together a julep, which can take about 20 minutes.

Julep cup — A sterling silver cup, the outside of which will turn completely white after receiving the julep.

Sipper — A sterling silver combination of a spoon and a straw.

Joe Cumming’s Georgia Julep 1 quart straight bourbon whiskey 1 box 10x powdered sugar 20-25 sprigs Kentucky Colonel mint Lots of crushed ice 8 silver mint julep cups 8 silver sippers The day prior to serving, remove about three jiggers of whiskey from the bottle (Cumming advises either putting it in another bottle or drinking it). Push 10-15 3” to 5” sprigs of mint, slightly bruised with your hands, down the neck of the bottle and add 1⁄2 teaspoon powdered sugar. Shake and place in refrigerator for 24 hours.

When ready to serve, put sippers in cups and place a small bowl of powdered sugar and a larger bowl of crushed ice beside you. Fill cups 1⁄3 of way up with ice. Top with 1⁄3 to 1⁄2 teaspoon of sugar. Stir. Repeat until you reach the tops of the cups. Pour whiskey over the ice until about 1⁄2 inch from top. Add more ice and stir well without disturbing the frost on the cup.

Place a sprig of mint and a sprinkling of powdered sugar on top.

“Part of my family is from Philadelphia, but I don’t think of them when I drink these.”

— Local Julepist Harry Vaiden

in the mix An Augusta native who recently returned home after a brief sabbatical in New Orleans, David has worked as a bartender at Bambu on Hickman since it opened two years ago.

Pat O’Briens’ Hurricane … your opinion?

It’s the best hurricane in the entire world and I wouldn’t drink three. That’s my opinion.

First love Do I have to say my fiancée or can I say soccer? I’m going to say soccer. She’ll understand.

Strangest Bourbon Street sight My brother in a coconut bra and bikini bottoms during Mardi Gras.

Does he play?

I played all through high school and college and still play in a couple of leagues here in Augusta.

Frankenberry, Count Chocula or Boo Berry?

Count Chocula; that’s easy. I’m a chocoholic.

David Beckham: Great soccer player or complete idiot?

Great soccer player, without a doubt. You don’t get on two of the best soccer teams in the world by being a complete idiot.

What’s it like working for Philippe Chin?

It’s great. We have a lot in common.

Photo by Joe White

I’m constantly searching for…

Peace of mind. That and a winning lottery ticket.

Does he have a chef’s temperament?

He does, but only because he wants it done right the first time. He’s a perfectionist. He’s very passionate about what he does.

Best place (besides Bambu) to get sushi Mikoto on Washington Road. I love their tuna sashimi.

David Pohlmann

Bartender, Bambu on Hickman

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! FREE admission every day the Gardens are open to the public. ! FREE guest passes (quantity is level specific) - Each guest pass is a $6.00 value! ! FREE or discounted admission to more than 150 participating gardens across the country INCLUDING FREE Admission at the Atlanta Botanical Gardens AND FREE Admission at Riverbanks Zoo and Gardens in Columbia, SC. Garden Reciprocal Admission List available at www.gghf.org ! FREE subscription to Georgia Golf Hall of Fame's Botanical Gardens newsletter, LEADERBOARD ! 10% DISCOUNTS in onsite gift shop or virtual store at www.gghf.org ! DISCOUNT on education adventures, including seminars and day camps. ! INVITATIONS to special member events and new exhibit previews. ! FREE or discount admission to all Botanical Gardens sponsored events. ! NEW Spring 2004: Community Partners Discounts from gardening-related retailers & florists. ! All memberships are tax deductible to the extent allowed by law.

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Argentina’s Opus Cuarto To Visit the Marbury Center

By Rhonda Jones

26

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

O

n April 30, the Marbury Center on Broad Street in downtown Augusta will play host to a vocal quartet from Argentina, Opus Cuatro: Alberto Hassan (1st tenor), Marcelo Balsells (2nd tenor), Hernando Irahola (baritone) and Federico Galiana (bass).

The group has been together since 1968, and tend to focus on Latin American popular and folk music, particularly that from Argentina. They have performed many thousands of times over the past 36 years, many of those performances being far away from home — in Russia, Austria, Japan and the Czech Republic.

Oh, and the United States as well.

They even sing some songs especially for American fans, such as the famous “It Don’t Mean a Thing (If It Ain’t Got That Swing).”

If you enjoy Latin music, or if you want to

Artists: Opus Cuatro Venue: The Marbury Center

brush off the Spanish you learned in school, Opus Cuatro has plenty of recordings for you to choose from. Here are a few of their later recordings.

• “Por Amor” (1992) • “Jazz – Spirituals – Musicals” (1993) • “Opus Cuatro Canta Con Los Coros Argentinos” (1994) • “No Dejes de Cantar” (1996) • “Opus Cuatro Canta Con Los Coros Argentinos II” (1997) • “Opus Cuatro se Vuelve a Mas” (1998) • “Milagro de Amor” (1998) • “Cantata al General Don Jose de San Martin” (1999) • “Europa en Vivo” (2000) • “Tangos, Valses y Milongas” (2001) • “Los Opus y Los Vientos” (2003) Check out www.opuscuatro.com for more information. The site first appears in Spanish, but there is an English option.

Date: April 30, 8 p.m.

For Info: 721-2505 or 650-8154

arts

Massive Art Show at the Aiken Center for the Arts

I

FORT GORDON IN DANGER?

By Rhonda Jones

f you want to see not only art, but lots and lots of art, head on over to the Aiken Center for the Arts. They are currently housing about 80 paintings in an exhibit that is the result of a juried art show featuring $10,000 in cash awards. The contestants are still sweating it out, as the winners have not yet been chosen. The Best in Show award is $1,000 in itself. The rest of the prize money will be distributed among 29 additional winners.

The juror is Warren Taylor (pictured), an art instructor at Midlands College, Texas, since 1979. In conjunction with this exhibit, he taught a five-day “Contemporary and Creative Still Life” workshop.

According to materials provided by the South Carolina Watercolor Society, the host organization for the exhibit, Taylor refers to the process of accepting and rejecting pieces of work as a “necessary evil.”

“A jury notice isn’t a very articulate form of criticism, is it? Accept or reject. The wording should read ‘accepted’ or ‘declined,’ because only the artist can truly reject the work. There have been times that the most memorable works in a competition, for me the juror, have been the ones that are cut in the very last moments. That’s because they might be eliminated for very thin reasons and the artist will never know how close they were.”

The Base Realignment and Closure (BRAC) Commission may list Fort Gordon as one of the bases scheduled for possible shut down in the near future.

What Taylor Looks for as a Juror “I don’t favor realism over abstract or still life over landscape. I go for quality and maturity. The first thing that I look for in watercolor shows is the factor of originality.

In this era of technical and ‘how to’ books and this age of workshops, it is easy for some painters to shadow another painter almost without knowing. If it’s original in spirit and soul, then it’s fresh to me and will be a joy to the viewer. The secondary factors are pretty much assumed. That is: Is the composition exciting? Are the colors under control? Is the scaling of internal factors understood, and is the presentation appropriate? If these aspects are weak or faltering, then the entrant may not be ready for competition.”

Rejection Not So Bad “Those whose works are not accepted should understand that a reject in the mail is not some sort of message from the great art temple; it is only the opinion of someone maybe further down the road. … It still hurts when I get a reject in the mail. It hurts for maybe five minutes. The truth is that no one enters exhibitions without some expectation of exhibition and/or awards. My advice is to just fill out the forms, enter the painting and/or treat the slides correctly, and guard against all sorts of wishful thinking. If you don’t make it, be a good sport and try the next umpire.”

The ‘CSRA Alliance for Fort Gordon’ has been formed to prevent this, but we need the help of the entire Augusta community to succeed.

Consider the vital role Fort Gordon plays in the CSRA. Fort Gordon is the CSRA’s largest employer with a workforce of more than 12,500 military and nearly 5,000 civilians.

Fort Gordon’s income impact of $1.2 billion goes directly into area retail stores, banks, real estate and other businesses.

28 percent of employed Richmond Countyresidents have jobs because of Fort Gordon; 14 percent in Columbia County.

Nearly 13,000 military retirees live in the CSRA, generating $214 million in military retirement income.

Fort Gordon impacts surrounding counties like Aiken, Edgefield, Burke, Jefferson & McDuffie.

FIVE FORT for the

“Five for the Fort” is your chance to help.

Many hands make light work. By giving just five dollars you can support Fort Gordon through the CSRA Alliance. Funds raised will be directed towards projects and programs committed to keeping Fort Gordon open.

Please support this effort to save not only Fort Gordon, but the entire CSRA and receive a CSRA Alliance “Defending the Future” bumper sticker!

I gave my five!

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I support the CSRA Alliance!

Enclosed is my gift of $5.

I’d like to give more, enclosed is my gift of: ! $10 ! $20 ! $50 ! $75 ! $100 ! $________________

Name Address City Zip

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Exhibit: The South Carolina Watercolor Society’s 27th Annual Exhibition Artists: Many, many contestants

Venue: Aiken Center for the Arts, Aiken, S.C. Dates: Through June 27 For Info: (803) 641-9094

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I would like to serve as a volunteer.

Please make checks payable to: CSRA Alliance Mail form and check to: P.O. Box 670 Augusta, GA 30903

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

State

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arts

Augusta Players Present “The Wiz”

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By Rhonda Jones

LEFT TO RIGHT: MAXWELL R. SMITH (THE TIN MAN), JONATHAN K. MALLETT (THE LION), JEWETT V. MUKENGE (DOROTHY), RAQI BARNETT (THE SCARECROW) The Wiz” is just “The Wizard of Oz,” right?

“Yeah, it is based on the L. Frank Baum story,” said artistic director Richard Justice. “The major difference is, ‘The Wiz’ was created as a Broadway production, so it is a true Broadway show. The movie was made first so it doesn’t translate as well (to the stage) as ‘The Wiz’ does.”

A few other differences “It was made in the mid-‘70s — ‘74, ’75. It has a very urban feel to it, with the African-American culture, but it’s basically the same story: It’s a wizard; it’s Dorothy and her three friends,” Justice said. He also mentioned that there is an extra good witch, and that the accompanying music is in the styles of R&B, jazz, soul and gospel.

And yet it’s the same “It’s the same telling,” Justice said. “They want the courage; they want the heart and they want the brains. One close resemblance to the L. Frank Baum story is, in ‘The Wizard of Oz’ (the book), they all wear green shades — how you see the world through different shades. But it is very urban, very ‘70s.”

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Didn’t Michael Jackson do this?

Why, yes, Justice said. He played the Scarecrow in the movie version of “The Wiz,”

Augusta • 737-4120 North Augusta • 278-4338 Aiken • 641-0144 Bugstopper.com

which was released in 1978. Diana Ross was Dorothy. Other stars included Lena Horne, Nipsey Russell, Mabel King, Roberta Flack, Gwen Guthrie, Richard Pryor, Ted Ross, Theresa Merrit, Cissy Houston and Luther Vandross.

The Russell Joel Brown connection “Russell will be playing the Wiz,” Justice said.

“The Wiz has a couple of solos and he has a more key role in the Broadway production of ‘The Wiz’ than the Wizard plays in ‘The Wizard of Oz.’ I think he (Russell) has three solos in the production.”

Was getting an all-African-American cast difficult?

“Actually it was not,” Justice said. “We were very lucky. … And we were very pleased with the turnout for the auditions.”

It’s a large cast, he said, with between 55 and 60 actors ranging in age from 6 (Munchkins) on up. Ferneasa Cutno is the show’s choreographer.

There are several dance pieces in the show, he said, including a “huge” tornado ballet.

“It’s a very exciting cast,” he said. The cast includes dancers, singers and actors — sometimes all combined in the same performer, as is the case with Russell Joel Brown. “It’s all sort of intertwined.”

Production: “The Wiz” Theatre Company: The Augusta Players Venue: The Imperial Theatre

Times: April 30 and May 1, 8 p.m.; May 2, 3 p.m.

Tix & Info: 826-4707

Augusta Dance Theatre’s Spring Show Each year, Augusta Dance Theatre gives a spring performance of “The Roar of Love,” which is a ballet rendition of “The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.” It’s an original ballet by Ron Jones, founding director of the company.

“You’d think we’d get tired of it, performing it every year,” commented Kathleen Jones, co-director. “But every year we get more excited about it. We use it as a vehicle to show what they learn from year to year.”

This will be the 19th year they’ve produced “The Roar of Love.”

Production: “The Roar of Love” Company: Augusta Dance Theatre Venue: Bell Auditorium

Times: April 30, 8 p.m.; May 1, 3 p.m.

Tix & Info: (706) 860-1852 or visit www.augustadancetheatre.com

11th annual

Blues Festival Saturday, May 22, 2004

! MARCIA BALL " PINETOP PERKINS

BOB MARGOLIN JIMMY THACKERY WOODY MANN MARY FLOWER THE REDSTICK RAMBLERS

www.tixonline.com or call 706.597.1000.

Festival site: 2 miles north of I-20 exit 172 at Thomson. No coolers, pets, cooking or camping. Food and drink available.

Sponsored by the Activities Council of Thomson | P.O. Box 674 | Thomson, GA 30824 www.blindwillie.com Artwork by Keith Rasmussen

}

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

{

GATES OPEN 11 A.M. RAIN OR SHINE. MUSIC STARTS AT NOON. $15 advance | $20 at the gate

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Kids

Learning

Volunteers

Sports

Calendar Health

Education

Out of Town Music

Special

Benefits Meetings Theater Auditions Exhibitions Attractions MuseumsArts Seniors Dance Arts

Painted Violins Project, and are the work of Augusta professional artists and two students from Davidson Fine Arts School: Natalie Logue and Nathan Thomason. The violins will be on display throughout the CSRA from Sept. 2004 to April 2005. Contact (706) 826-4705.

Auditions ENOPION THEATRE COMPANY is looking for volunteers to act, sing, sew, build and more for their new musical, “Creation.” Applications are available at www.imaryproductions.com or by calling (803) 442-9039.

THE 521 ALL-STARS: A CHAMPIONSHIP STORY OF BASEBALL AND COMMUNITY will be on display at The Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History, May 2-June 30. An opening reception is scheduled for May 2 from 3-5 p.m.

SWEET ADELINES HARMONY RIVER CHORUS OPEN REHEARSAL for singers each Thursday at 7 p.m. at Church of Christ, 600 Martintown Rd. in North Augusta.

They are on the lookout for voices in the lower ranges.

Contact Stacy Branch at 877-9931.

ONE-DAY ARTISTS’ MARKET co-sponsored by the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art to take place at Augusta Mall May 8. For info call (706) 722-5495 or (803) 278-7322 or visit www.ghia.org.

Dance

AUGUSTA CHILDREN’S CHORALE is holding auditions on three Saturdays this spring. For more information, call 826-4718.

THE BEECH ISLAND HISTORICAL SOCIETY is looking for a couple to duplicate a wedding that took place on the Sandbar Ferry Bridge in 1924. Clothing, vintage automobile, media coverage, minister and music will be provided at no cost to the wedding couple.

The Historical Society would like the groom to be from Georgia and the bride to be from South Carolina. For more information, contact Joan Harrison at (803) 827-3209 or The Beech Island Historical Society at (803) 867-3600.

DIASPRA PRODUCTIONS will begin holding auditions for a Feb. 2005 production of “The Village,” a multiethnic gospel stage play. Actors, singers, dancers, stage hands and musicians are needed. Auditions will be May 3 at Wallace Branch Library 7-9 p.m.; May 10 at Wallace Branch Library, 6-8 p.m.; May 15 at Maxwell Branch Library, 10 a.m.-12 p.m.; and May 17 at Springfield Baptist Church, 6-8 p.m. Call toll-free and 1-877-752-6022.

Education ISRAELI DANCE WORKSHOP at the Augusta Jewish Community Center Sunday afternoons, 4-5 p.m. Open to teens and adults; no experience or partners are necessary.

Cost is $2 per session, with the first session free. For information or to schedule a pre-class beginner/refresher session, contact Jackie Cohen, 738-9016.

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

ART CLASSES AND WORKSHOPS are offered yearround at the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art. Classes and workshops are open to toddlers through adults and feature instruction in drawing, painting, photography, pottery, weaving and sculpture. For a newsletter or detailed information on registering for classes at the Gertrude Herbert, call 722-5495. The Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art also offers educational tours; for information, contact the education director at the above telephone number.

30

ART CLASSES FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS at the Art Factory. The Art Factory also has a homeschool program and scholarships are available. Programs include paint-

THE AUGUSTA INTERNATIONAL FOLK DANCE CLUB meets Thursday evenings at 7:30 p.m. No partners are needed and newcomers are welcome. Call 737-6299 for location and info.

THE CANTERBURY CHOIR OF SAINT PAUL’S CHURCH ON 6TH AND REYNOLDS AT THE RIVERWALK IN DOWNTOWN AUGUSTA WILL APPEAR IN CONCERT FRIDAY, APRIL 30, AT 7 P.M. ing, pottery, pilates, hip-hop and modern dance and more. Classes are held at the Art Factory, 418 Crawford Ave., or at the Augusta Jewish Community Center. Call 731-0008 for details.

THE CULTURAL ARTS EDUCATORS OF AUGUSTA will have a teacher’s fair April 27 from 3-6 p.m. at First Baptist Church of Augusta gymnasium. All CSRA teachers (public, private and homeschool) are encouraged to attend. Phone (706) 826-4706.

Exhibitions RICHARD JOLLEY, sculptor of glass, will display works through May 9 at the Morris Museum of Art. For more information, call 724-7501.

GRADUATING SENIORS ART EXHIBITION at ASU’s Fine Arts Gallery through April 30. Free. For more information, call 737-1878.

JANOS ENYEDI: THE AMERICAN INDUSTRIAL LANDSCAPE — RECONSTRUCTED will be on view at the Morris Museum of Art through May 30. For more information, call 724-7501.

SENIOR VISUAL ART EXIT SHOW by Davidson Fine Arts School runs through April 30 at the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art. For more information, call 823-6924, ext. 153.

WORKS OF TOM NAKASHIMA AND JANOS ENYEDI will be on display at the Mary Pauline Gallery through May 29. For more information, call 724-9542.

ELIZABETH CAIN & ALEX POWERS: “WORKS ON PAPER” — Georgia and South Carolina coast painters come to Augusta for a two-person exhibit at the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art through May 28. Special reception Thursday, April 22, 6-8 p.m. Painting workshop with Cain April 24, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. To register, call (706) 722-5495.

WORKS BY JIM HARRISON FEATURED at a special customer appreciation show at the Nancy Carson Library in North Augusta. April 25, 2-5 p.m. For info, call 1-800-793-5796.

HARRIET MARSHALL GOODE, “PERSONAL HISTORY BOX,” watercolor and acrylic paintings will be shown through May 29 at Rabold Gallery in Aiken. (703) 641-4405.

ARTIST NINA BENEDETTO exhibits works April 23, 7-10 p.m. at 4527 Bellingham Court in Stratford subdivision, Evans. To RSVP or for directions, call Helen Stephens at 650-1618, Barbara Coleman at 733-7481 or Evelyn Browne at 863-4553. Or e-mail HelenS@AugustaPrep.org, bcoleman@aug.edu or ewbrowne@aol.com.

PAINTED VIOLINS on display at Augusta Mall. The violins are a result of the Augusta Symphony Guild’s

AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE UNITED STATES AMATEUR BALLROOM DANCERS ASSOCIATION holds a dance the first Saturday of each month, from 7:15-11 p.m. Cost is $7 for members and $10 for non-members.

Held at the BPOE facility on Elkdom Court. Contact Melvis Lovett, 733-3890, or Jean Avery, 863-4186, for information.

Music FINAL SPRING CONCERT AT THE COMMON will be held May 1 from 7-9 p.m. For more information, call 821-1754.

1ST ANNUAL AIKEN BLUEGRASS FESTIVAL takes place April 30 and May 1 in the Washington Theatre in downtown Aiken. For information, call (803) 502-4746, (803) 648-6719.

CANDLELIGHT JAZZ LINEUP BEGINS May 2 at Augusta Common, 7 p.m., featuring the Jerry Harris Tribute Band, Kenny Carr & the Tigers and Damien Sneed & Akua Aidoo. For information, call (706) 821-1754 or visit www.gardencityjazz.com.

2ND BI-ANNUAL BANDFEST FEATURING BLESSID UNION OF SOULS will be at USC-Aiken, April 23. For information call (803) 221-4325, (803) 641-3354 or (614) 451-1100.

ARGENTINIAN QUARTET OPUS CUATRO will play at the Marbury Center on April 30 at 8 p.m. $20 donation.

(706) 721-2505 or (706) 650-8154.

THE AUGUSTA CHORAL SOCIETY and the United States Army Signal Corps Band from Fort Gordon will present a musical performance at Sacred Heart Cultural Center Friday, April 30, at 8 p.m. 826-4713.

THE SPRING CLASSIC WITH VIOLINIST XUE WEI and The Augusta Symphony Orchestra, April 23 at 8 p.m. at the Etherredge Center in Aiken 826-4705 or (803) 641-3305.

Au

l a C n a r u g usta C oo ise C k & o

Paddle, Pedal & Party!

PRESENTS

17th Annual

ut

N AT I O N A L H E R I TA G E A R E A

May 1, 2004 Celebrate Springtime along the Augusta Canal Paddle on the water or Pedal along the towpath and Party at the Augusta Canal at Enterprise Mill. Enjoy barbeque from Sconyers and bluegrass from Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold. Plus hop aboard the Canal’s Petersburg tour boats and take a trip through the Interpretive Center. It’s all part of the 17th annual Augusta Canal Cruise and Cookout!

Fun Activities for All Ages: ! New Petersburg tour boats - Boats depart from the docks throughout the afternoon. ! Free Admission to the Augusta Canal Interpretive Center - for all Cruise and Cookout ticket holders.

Check out the great interactive exhibits! ! Canoeing - $40 per person includes canoe, life jacket, security and bus transportation from the Mill to the Headgates and chance to win kayak from A.W.O.L. (Children must be 7 and older and accompanied by a parent.)

New to Canoes?

FREE Lessons AWOL Paddle Days Lake Olmstead April 24

! Bicycling - $20 per person includes mid-ride refreshment station and chance to win a bike from Andy Jordan's. Ride begins and ends at the Enterprise Mill. ! Kayaking - $15 per person. Bring your kayak and follow the canoers to Enterpise Mill. Then join the party! ! Picnic Only - $15 per person. Includes Interpretive Center and Petersburg tour boat ride.

All tickets include refreshments, admission to the barbeque at the Mill, admission to the Augusta Canal Interpretive Center, and a Petersburg boat ride (as space is available). The first 150 people to register to canoe, kayak or cycle receive a free Canal Cruise t-shirt!

Registration Deadline: Thursday April 29th, noon.

Check-in begins at 1 p.m. at the Augusta Canal Headquarters at Enterprise Mill

For more details call 706-823-0440 or visit www.AugustaCanal.com

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Aug usta Canal Cruise & Cookout

Andy Jordan’s Bicycle Warehouse AWOL-American Wilderness Outfitters Communigraphics Publix and Publix Charities Sconyers Barbeque Taylor Auto Group

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“AN EVENING WITH BERNSTEIN” at The Etherredge Center in Aiken April 29, 8 p.m. (803) 641-3305.

encompassing 12,000 years of local history. For the younger crowd, there’s the Susan L. Still Children’s Discovery Gallery, where kids can learn about history in a hands-on environment. The museum also shows films in the History Theatre and hosts a variety of programs.

Located at 560 Reynolds Street. Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sunday 1-5 p.m. Admission is $4 adult, $3 seniors, $2 kids (6-18 years of age) and free for children under 6. Free admission on Sundays. Call 722-8454 or visit www.augustamuseum.org for more information.

AUGUSTA SYMPHONY PRESENTS “Highlands to the Orient” featuring violinist Xue-Wei, April 24, 7 p.m. at the Maxwell Performing Arts Theatre, ASU. (706) 826-4705.

ASU MUSIC EVENTS include the ASU Orchestra “Concerto Concert” on April 27, an ASU Choir Concert on April 29.

POWERFEST 2004, sponsored by Power 107, will take place at the Augusta Lock & Dam at 1853 Lock and Dam Road, April 24 beginning at 1 p.m. (706) 396-6000.

THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART hosts exhibitions and special events year-round. Special events include an artist’s talk by Alex Powers April 22, “Local Authors Respond to Southern Art” April 25, the Jazz on Film series April 27. Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sundays, noon-5 p.m. Closed on Mondays and major holidays. 1 Tenth Street, Augusta. Call 724-7501 or visit www.themorris.org for details.

19TH ANNUAL A DAY IN THE COUNTRY CAR & TRUCK SHOW AND MUSIC FESTIVAL Saturday, May 1 at Augusta Riverfront Marina, followed by A Day in the Country Cars, Crafts & Music Festival Weekend concert May 2. Contact (803) 279-8017 or tkp@tixonline.com. Register vehicle at registeronline.net or call contact number.

THE MUSEUM OF LAUREL AND HARDY OF HARLEM, GEORGIA features displays of various Laurel and Hardy memorabilia; films also shown. Located at 250 N. Louisville Street in downtown Harlem. Open 1-4 p.m.

Thursday-Monday. For more information, call 556-3448.

THE CANTERBURY CHOIR OF ST. PAUL’S CHURCH, an ensemble comprised of 25 children in grades 3-8, will appear in concert on Friday, April 30 at 7 p.m. Tenor Johnny Lee Green and soprano Amanda Glover will join the kids in a program featuring spirituals arranged by Moses Hogan as well as other choral music for children’s and solo voices. For info visit www.saintpauls.org, call (706) 724-2485, ext. 215 or email kshafer@saintpauls.org.

THE 12 BANDS OF CHRISTMAS is now accepting submissions for the 2004 12 Bands of Christmas benefit and concert. Last year’s event raised $10,000 for MCG’s Children’s Medical Center. If you are an aspiring singer/songwriter or in a band, record a demo of an original or traditional Christmas song that you would like included in this year’s compilation. Artists will be chosen based on performance and song, not the quality of the recording. Submission is free, but CDs will not be returned. Include your name, band name, phone number, e-mail address and song name on the CD. There is no guarantee that your song will be used. If selected as one of the 12 Bands of Christmas, you will receive recording and production tme with producer Ruskin Yeargain for the song that you submitted. You will also be a featured act in December at the Imperial Theatre concert. All costs of this, including any licensing fees, will be paid by Bordertown Music. This is a non-profit fund-raiser. Mail your CDs to 12 Bands of Christmas, Attention: Joe Stevenson, 3208 A Mike Padgett Hwy., Augusta, GA 30906. E-mail MP3s to jstevenson@bellsouth.net. Deadline is June 1.

Theatre “A NIGHT BY THE FOUNTAIN” poetry and prose reading sponsored by “Broken Ink,” USC-Aiken’s literary magazine, 7 p.m. April 21. The event will be held by the fountain in the USC-Aiken Quad. For more information, contact Jessica Baptiste or Clinton Strickland at (803) 641-3354.

MISSOULA CHILDREN’S THEATRE WILL PERFORM a modern-day “Hansel & Gretel,” Saturday, April 24 at 3 and 7 p.m. at the Fort Gordon Performing Arts Center.

THE AUGUSTA PLAYERS PRESENT “THE WIZ” with Russell Joel Brown at the Imperial Theatre April 30 and May 1 at 8 p.m. and May 2 at 3 p.m. 826-4707.

ASU’S BORN TO READ LITERACY CENTER & Patchwork Players present “Gingerbread Man” April 22 at ASU’s Maxwell Performing Arts Theatre. Showtimes 9 a.m., 10 a.m., 11 a.m. Tickets $3. 733-7043.

AUGUSTA MINI THEATRE presents their youth production of “A Little Bit of This and a Little Bit of That,” April 30 and May 1 at 8 p.m. at the Jack B. Patrick Technology Center on the campus of Augusta Technical College. For info call (706) 722-0598 or visit www.augustaminitheatre.org.

Attractions METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

MOTORIZED TOURS OF HISTORIC AIKEN every Saturday, 10-11:30 a.m. Tours leave from the Washington Center for the Performing Arts. Reservations are required, and patrons must be age 2 and older.

(803) 642-7631.

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AUGUSTA CANAL INTERPRETIVE CENTER: Housed in Enterprise Mill, the center contains displays and models focusing on the Augusta Canal’s functions and importance to the textile industry. Hours are Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m. and Sun., 1-6 p.m. Admission is $5 adult, $4 seniors and military and $3 children ages 6-18.

Children under 6 admitted free. Guided boat tours of the Augusta Canal depart from the docks at Enterprise Mill at 11 a.m., 1:30 p.m. and 3 p.m. Saturdays and Tuesdays and Thursdays at 11 a.m. and 1:30 p.m. Tour tickets are $6 adults, $5 seniors and $4 students and

LUNCH AT NOON LECTURE SERIES held the second Wednesday of every month at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Call 724-3576 for more information.

HISTORY BOOK DISCUSSION GROUP co-sponsored by the Augusta Museum of History and the AugustaRichmond County Public Library. April 27 at 11 a.m. at Augusta Library HQ. (706) 722-8494.

Special Events DAVIDSON FINE ARTS STUDENT NATALIE LOGUE SHOWS OFF A WINNING PAINTED VIOLIN, WHICH IS CURRENTLY ON DISPLAY AT AUGUSTA MALL ALONG WITH THE VIOLIN OF FELLOW DAVIDSON STUDENT NATHAN THOMASON AND THOSE OF PROFESSIONAL ARTISTS. children. For tour information, call 823-7089. For other info, visit www.augustacanal.com or call 823-0440.

THE BOYHOOD HOME OF WOODROW WILSON: Circa 1859 Presbyterian manse occupied by the family of President Woodrow Wilson as a child during the Civil War and Reconstruction. Original and period antiques, restored house, kitchen and carriage house. 419 Seventh Street. Open 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Tues.-Sat. Tours available; groups of 10 or more by appointment only.

Admission is $5 adults, $4 seniors, $3 students under 18 and free for ages 5 and under. 722-9828.

AUGUSTA GOLF & BOTANICAL GARDENS OF THE GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME features beautiful display gardens, as well as bronze sculptures of some of golf’s greatest masters. Available for rent for a variety of functions. Group discount rates available. Closed Mondays; open from 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Tues.-Sat.; open from 1-5 p.m. on Sunday. Admission is $5.50 for adults; $4.50 for students, seniors and military; $3.50 for children (4-12); free for children 3 and under. Sundays are two for one with a Super Sunday coupon. Annual garden memberships are available. Call 724-4443 or 1-888-874-4443. Also, visit their Web site at www.gghf.org.

THE EZEKIEL HARRIS HOUSE: Deemed “the finest 18th century house surviving in Georgia” by the “Smithsonian Guide to Historic America.” Open Saturday, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. General admission is $2; senior admission is $1 and children get in for 50 cents. For more information, call 724-0436.

PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK: See egrets, blue herons, river otters and elusive alligators in their natural setting, just minutes from downtown Augusta. The park has observation decks, boardwalks and several nature trails suitable for hiking. April 24 brings the Earth Day Swamp Stomp 5K run, open house, exhibits, workshops, tours and concessions. Free of charge. May 4 brings Full Moon Wine and Chocolate from 7-9 p.m. Limited registration. Open Monday-Friday, noon-dusk, and Saturday and Sunday, dawn to dusk. For more information, call the Southeastern Natural Sciences Academy office at 828-2109.

FORT DISCOVERY CELEBRATES its 7th birthday April 25 with free admission all day, a birthday cake, free gift wrap at the science store and more. (706) 821-0607 or (800) 325-5445 ext. 5581.

NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER’S FORT DISCOVERY: Children and adults alike can immerse themselves in the wonders of science through live demonstrations, virtual realities, Starlab, KidScape and more than 250 hands-on exhibits. General Admission: $8 for adults; $6 for children, seniors and active military.

Group rates available. Operating hours: Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday, noon-5 p.m. Call 821-0200, 1-800-325-5445 or visit their Web site at www.NationalScienceCenter.org.

PEDAL, PADDLE AND PARTY! The 2004 edition of the Augusta Canal Cruise and Cookout, April 25, boasts new events, features and fun for the whole family. It begins and ends at the Augusta Canal headquarters at Enterprise Mill. Tix include refreshments, admission ot the picnic at the Mill, admission to the Augusta Canal Interpretive Center and a Petersburg boat ride (as space is available). Request applications at (706) 823-0440, ext. 2 or visit the Augusta Canal office at the Enterprise Mill, Suite 400 or www.augustacanal.com.

REDCLIFFE STATE HISTORIC SITE: 1859 mansion of S.C. Governor James Henry Hammond, held by the family for three generations until 1975. Grounds and slave quarters are open Thursday-Monday, 9 a.m.-6 p.m.

House tours will be offered at 1, 2 and 3 p.m. Admission to the grounds is free. Fee for house tours is $3 for adults and children ages 6-17. For more information, call (803) 827-1473. 181 Redcliffe Road, Beech Island.

Museums

SACRED HEART CULTURAL CENTER is offering tours of its 100-year-old building. Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m. $1 per person, children free. 826-4700.

AUGUSTA VISITORS INFORMATION CENTER open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sun. 1-5 p.m. Located inside the Augusta Museum of History. Call 724-4067.

THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART in Ware’s Folly exhibits works by local and regional artists. Art classes, workshops and other educational programming for children, youth and adults are held in the WalkerMackenzie Studio. Open Tuesday-Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Saturday by appointment only. Admission is free, but a donation of $2 for adults and $1 for children and seniors is encouraged. Call 722-5495 or visit www.ghia.org for more info.

THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY hosts permanent exhibition “Augusta’s Story,” an award-winning exhibit

AUGUSTA SHOWCASE, an economic development campaign to market the area to potential business residents, will soon be underway. The Augusta Metro Chamber of Commerce is giving presentations on the effort. Contact Tammy Stout, 722-8326, ext. 2, to schedule a speaker for your club or civic group.

MCDUFFIE FRIENDS OF ANIMALS holds pet adoptions each Saturday, 1-3 p.m. at Superpetz on Bobby Jones Expressway. Call 556-9090 or visit www.petfinder.com.

COLUMBIA COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and every Sunday from 1-4 p.m. at PetsMart. For more info, call 860-5020.

RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL AND AUGUSTA ANIMAL RESCUE FRIENDS hold pet adoptions at Superpetz off Bobby Jones Expressway every Sunday from 1-4 p.m. Call AARF at 364-4747 or visit www.aarf.net. Adoptions also held at the Richmond County Animal Control Shelter, Tues.-Sun., 1-5 p.m. Call the shelter at 790-6836.

THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. and every Wednesday evening from 5:30-7:30 p.m. at the Pet Center located behind the GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Rd. 261-PETS. MOLLY’S MILITIA, a pet adoption agency, meets each Saturday at Superpetz in Aiken from 11 a.m.-3 p.m., PetsMart in Aiken from 3-6:30 p.m., and PetsMart in Augusta from 4:30-7:30 p.m. For more information, call (803) 279-7003.

DOWNTOWN LUNCH DATE each Wednesday through June 30 from noon-1:30 p.m. at the Augusta Common.

Will feature lunch from a local restaurant and musical entertainment. For more information, call 821-1754.

SALVATION ARMY TO AUCTION over 120 cars, trucks and boats April 24 at the Salvation Army Administrative Office at 1384 Greene Street. Starts at 10 a.m. Pre-registration and fleet inspection will be held April 22-24 from 8 a.m.-6 p.m. Registration only will be held from 8 a.m.-10 a.m. the morning of the auction. A $5 registration fee is required to bid. For info call 826-7933.

PLANT SWAP & SALE takes place May 1, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. at Pendleton King Park Pavilion at 1600 Troupe Street, Augusta. 738-4321.

BORDER BEER BUST April 23, 4-9 p.m. and April 24, 19 p.m. along Augusta’s Riverwalk between 7th and 8th streets. 823-3320.

CINCO DE MAYO CELEBRATION on Barton Field and at Freedom Park at Fort Gordon, April 29-May 2. Festivities are open to the public and include a carnival, flea market, live music, ethnic foods, pony rides, a car show and fireworks. Phone (706) 791-3639.

THIRD ANNUAL AIKEN HIGHLAND GAMES AND CELTIC FESTIVAL April 30-May 2 at Sporting Days Farm on Hwy. 78, seven miles east of Aiken. Phone (803) 649-7374 or (803) 649-3101 or e-mail aikengames@bellsouth.net.

SECOND ANNUAL GROVETOWN HERITAGE FESTIVAL April 24 in the area of City Hall at the crossroads of Robinson Avenue and Old Wrightsboro Road. Phone 863-6355.

HARRISBURG COMMUNITY ARTS & CULTURAL FESTIVAL, presented by the Art Factory, May 1 at the Ezekiel Harris House from 11 a.m.-4 p.m. Music, pottery demonstrations, free guided tours of the Harris House, Harrisburg artists and craftspeople, concessions. No admission charge. Call (706) 731-0008.

Out of Town GEORGIA RENAISSANCE FESTIVAL runs through June 6 from 10:30 a.m. to 6 p.m. For info visit www.georgiarenaissancefestival.com/.

AT THE GEORGIA MUSEUM OF ART in Athens, Ga.: “Leaving for the Country: George Bellows at Woodstock” through May 16. Visit www.uga.edu/gamuseum or call (706) 542-4662 for info.

AT THE HIGH MUSEUM OF ART in Atlanta: “Glories of Ancient Egypt,” through Sept. 19; and “African Gold From the Glassell Collection,” through Sept. 19. Call (404) 733-HIGH or visit www.high.org for information.

ALLIANCE THEATRE COMPANY presents “A Death in the House Next Door to Kathleen Turner’s House on Long Island,” April 28-May 30. Season ticket office (404) 733-4600 or visit www.alliancetheatre.org. Box office (404) 733-5000.

THE ATLANTA JAZZ FESTIVAL takes place May 131 in venues throughout Atlanta. Free. Visit www.atlantafestivals.com.

THE GEORGIA MUSIC HALL OF FAME in downtown Macon presents the Live at Five Spring Concert Series Tuesdays in April & May, 5-7 p.m. April 27 features Elise Witt. (478) 750-8555.

ATLANTA’S NEW AMERICAN SHAKESPEARE TAVERN presents “A Man for All Seasons” through May 9.

(404) 874-5299.

NEW FDR MUSEUM IN WARM SPRINGS, GA. at the Little White House site. For info call (706) 655-5870 or visit www.fdr-whitehouse.org.

LITTLE RICHARD will perform in Mableton, Ga., at Mable House Amphitheatre May 1, 8 p.m. Cost is $15$45. Call (404) 577-8686 or e-mail info@360media.net.

Benefits DERBY DAY to benefit the Augusta Training Shop for the Handicapped May 1, 3-7 p.m., at the Augusta Riding Center, 1403 Flowing Wells Rd. Event includes Southern cuisine, contests, live music and two big-screen TVs showing the Kentucky Derby. Advance tickets are $35 and are available at all Georgia Bank and Trust locations. For information, contact Sandra Gurley at 7242601 or Audrey Murell at 738-1358.

AUGUSTA BALLET MERCEDES RAFFLE: The Augusta Ballet will raffle off a 2004 Mercedes CLK 320 Cabriolet during May’s First Friday celebration. Tickets are $100 each and may be purchased through the ballet office at 261-0555.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL is in need of dog and cat food, cat litter and other pet items, as well as monetary donations to help pay for vaccinations. Donations accepted during regular business hours, Tues.-Sun., 1-5 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Call 790-6836 for information.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER BLOOD DRIVES in various locations around the CSRA this month. For detailed information on locations and times to donate, visit www.shepeardblood.org. You may also call Susan Edwards at (803) 643-7996 for information on Aiken locations and Nancy Szocinski at 737-4551 for information on all other locations.

AMERICAN RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVES at the Aiken Red Cross Blood Center on Millbrook Drive and the Augusta Red Cross Blood Center on Pleasant Home Road. The bloodmobile will also stop at various area locations this week. For a complete list, call the Aiken Blood Center at (803) 642-5180 or the Augusta Blood Center at 868-8800.

HOPE HOUSE “VIVA LAS VEGAS” FUNDRAISER will take place May 7, 6:30-11 p.m. at the Radisson

Riverfront Hotel. The evening will feature a Vegas-style casino including craps, blackjack, roulette and poker, with prizes available to purchase with winnings. All proceeds benefit Hope House, Inc. For more information, call 737-9879.

MARCH OF DIMES COLUMBIA-RICHMOND WALKAMERICA 2004 to be held April 24 at GreenJacket Stadium. Registration begins at 8 a.m. For information, call (706) 733-8438.

GREYTHOUND LOVE GREYHOUND ADOPTION partners with the CSRA Humane Society for PetWalk 2004, starting at 2 p.m. April 25 at the CSRA Humane Society, Lake Olmstead in Augusta. Rain date May 2. For info visit http://greythoundlove.org or www.csrahumanesociety.org.

GOLF TOURNAMENT to benefit Leukemia and Lymphoma Society will be held at Gordon Lakes Golf Course on Fort Gordon, May 1. (706) 774-1986.

“GIVE BURNS THE BOOT” DRIVE sponsored by the Georgia Firefighters Burn Foundation and the Hephzibah Fire Dept. April 22-24. (706) 592-4511.

2-MILE WALK-FOR-LIFE supporting the Augusta Care Pregnancy Center, May 1 at Augusta’s Riverwalk.

Registration begins at 8:30 a.m. and the walk begins at 9 a.m. Call 724-5531.

Learning “ROOTS OF GARDENING” SERIES presented by Georgia Golf Hall of Fame’s Botanical Gardens. The ABC’s of Planting is from 6:30-7:30 p.m. May 20, June 17, July 15, Aug. 19, Sept. 16 and Oct. 21. For info call (706) 724-4443.

USC-AIKEN CONTINUING EDUCATION offers Paralegal Certificate Course, Taming the Wild Child, Conversational French, Italian, Spanish for the Beginner, Sign Language, Debt-Free Living and more. “Travelearn” learning vacations for adults and Education to Go online courses also available. For info, phone (803) 641-3563.

AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONTINUING EDUCATION is now offering the following classes: Shag, Ballroom, Line Dance, Beginning and Intermediate Language courses, Interior Design, Acting Workshop, Stained Glass, SAT Review, Power Yoga, Photography,

Origami and more. Also, ASU offers online courses. For more information, call 737-1636 or visit www.ced.aug.edu.

AIKEN TECH CONTINUING EDUCATION offers the following courses: computer technology courses, healthcare courses, contractor programs, real estate courses and more. Aiken Tech also offers Education to Go classes online. For more information or to register, call (803) 593-9231, ext. 1230.

GED classes are offered by the Community Resource Center. Tuition is free. Call 722-4999 for more information.

SERVICE CORPS OF RETIRED EXECUTIVES (SCORE) provides counseling and mentoring to business people either starting or continuing their business. Counseling is free and administered by retired executives. For more information, call 793-9998.

GOVERNMENTS PARTNERS WORKSHOP in the Business & Education Building at USCA, April 27 from 8 a.m.-5 p.m. Area businesses will be given an opportunity to learn about government services and products that can help their businesses increase cash flow and productivity. To register call (803) 641-3646 or e-mail sbdc@usca.edu.

MISTLETOE STATE PARK OFFERS a nature photography workshop for beginners April 24, and “A Look Into the World of Insects” May 1. Programs free with $2 park admission pass. Exhibits, films and children’s activities are scheduled nearly every weekend. Call (706) 541-0321.

FREE TUTORING at ASU’s Born to Read Literacy Center for all ages. Call 733-7043.

Health ANGELS HAVE WHEELS: Medicare recipients suffering from conditions such as arthritis, cardiovascular disease and respiratory disorders who have difficulty walking or propelling a standard wheelchair may be eligible to receive an electric wheelchair. For information on eligibility, call Gregory at 1-800-810-2877.

AUGUSTA BRAIN INJURY SUPPORT GROUP meets the second Thursday of every month, 6 p.m., at Walton West TLC. Brain injury survivors and their family members and caregivers are invited to attend. 737-9300.

New Shipment of Containers:

Annuals and Perennials Augusta’s Largest and Best Selection

Glazed Stoneware, Concrete, Zinc, Copper, Cast Iron and Terra Cotta

G R E E N H O U S E S

.

Hours: Monday - Friday 8:00 - 6:00 Saturday 8:00 - 5:00 1023 Oleander Drive, Augusta 733-2269

Follow Milledge Road past Olmstead Stadium - Turn left onto Lake Shore Loop Right on Ann - Right on Oleander

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

BEDFORD

33

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Voted Best Steak In Augusta For 15 Years 1987-2002

2856 Washington Rd. 73-STEAK 1654 Gordon Hwy. 796-1875

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TASTE what the talk is all about!

SOUTHERN CUISINE

AT ITS BEST

CHRONIC PAIN SUPPORT GROUP meets the first Thursday of every month, 10:30-11:30 a.m. at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital. 823-5294.

at 6:30 p.m. at The Clubhouse on Washington Road. Call 1-800-399-7312, ext. 224 to reserve a space.

Appetizers provided.

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL AMPUTEE CLINIC for new and experienced prosthetic users meets the third Thursday of each month, 1-3 p.m. 722-1244.

LIVING WITH GRIEF TELECONFERENCE at MCG’s Greenblatt Library and Augusta State University, April 28. For info call (800) 533-3949, (706) 729-6066, (800) 323-7007 or (706) 650-1522.

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL offers a number of health programs, including Fibromyalgia Aquatics, Water Aerobics, Wheelchair and Equipment Clinics, Therapeutic Massage, Yoga, Acupuncture, Children’s Medical Services Clinic, Special Needs Safety Seat Loaner Program. Focus on Healing exercise class for breast cancer survivors and more. Call 823-5294 for information.

DIET COUNSELING CLASSES for diabetics and those with high cholesterol at CSRA Partners in Health, 1220 Augusta West Parkway. Free. Call 860-3001 for class schedule.

UNIVERSITY HEALTH CARE SYSTEM COMMUNITY EDUCATION holds workshops, seminars and classes on a variety of topics: weight and nutrition, women’s health, cancer, diabetes, seniors’ health and more.

Support groups and health screenings are also offered.

Call 736-0847 for details.

Kids “DISNEY ON ICE PRINCESS CLASSICS” comes to Augusta-Richmond County Civic Center April 22-25.

Tickets are $12-$30. For tickets, visit www.disneyonice.com or call 828-7700.

“GINGERBREAD MAN” will be presented April 22 at 9, 10 and 11 a.m. by the ASU Born To Read Literacy Center and Patchwork Players. Held at the Maxwell Performing Arts Theatre. Tickets are $3. Call 733-7043 for reservations.

AIKEN COUNTY PONY CLUB meets weekly. Open to children of all ages who participate or are interested in equestrian sports. For more information, contact Lisa Smith at (803) 649-3399.

CSRA PARKINSON’S DISEASE SUPPORT GROUP will have their April meeting on April 27 at 6 p.m. in the St. John’s Towers dining room across from Bell Auditorium.

Program: “Caregiver’s Role.” Patients, caregivers, family are welcome to attend. (706) 855-7690 or (706) 8605868.

GIRLS INCORPORATED OF THE CSRA AFTER-SCHOOL PROGRAM runs through May 21. Open to girls currently enrolled in kindergarten through high school. In addition to offering specialized programs, Girls Incorporated offers van pick-up at select schools, neighborhood drop-off, homework room and a hot evening meal. For information, call 733-2512.

FREE ORAL CANCER SCREENING April 23 on the fourth floor of the MCG Ambulatory Care Center from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Call (706) 721-9566.

WEEKLY STORY SESSIONS at all branch libraries. Visit www.ecgrl.public.lib.ga.us for more information.

RAPE CRISIS AND SEXUAL ASSAULT SERVICES offers group counseling for victims of rape, date rape and childhood sexual abuse regardless of when the assault occured and whether or not it was reported. Free. Call (706) 724-5200.

BONE MARROW DRIVE April 22, hosted by Medical College of Georgia and Augusta State University students. (706) 721-4410.

IMPROVING THE CHEMOTHERAPY EXPERIENCE is a free educational program to be offered April 27, starting

FIRST SATURDAY STORYTELLING at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum. In addition, there is a tour of the museum. Held 10 a.m.-noon the first Saturday of the month.

Call 724-3576.

STORYTIME IN THE GARDENS will take place Tuesdays at 4 p.m. in May in Hopeland Gardens. For more information, call (803) 642-7631.

TIME TO CARE FAMILY FAIR will take place April 24 from 11 a.m.-4 p.m. For info call (803) 279-1212.

FAMILY EARTH AND SKY NIGHT April 24 from 6-11 p.m. hosted by the Augusta Astronomy Club, the Dupont Planetarium and the Ruth Patrick Science Education Center. (803) 641-3313.

ANNUAL CHILDREN’S FESTIVAL at Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History. Children free, adults $3. April 24 10 a.m.–4 p.m.

“HOW CAN MY CHILD BE READY TO GO TO COLLEGE WHEN SHE/HE CAN’T REMEMBER TO FEED THE DOG?” is the topic of the Project LINK lecture for May 4 at the main conference center (BT-1810) in the MCG Children’s Medical Center. Free and open to the public.

From 6:30-8 p.m. Call (706) 721-KIDS.

Seniors UNIVERSITY SENIORS CLUB has moved to a new location at 4106 Columbia Rd. University Seniors Club offers health screenings, support groups, health education classes and social activities. For more information, call 868-3231 or 1-800-413-6652.

HOME-BASED CARE available for low- to mid-income families seeking alternatives to nursing home placement. To participate, individuals must be aged 60 or up or must have disability status as defined by Social Security Administration guidelines. Applicants must also meet program income guidelines. For more information, contact the CSRA Area Agency on Aging at 210-2018 or 1-888-922-4464.

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL offers Arthritis Aquatics and People with Arthritis Can Exercise. Call 823-5294 for information.

SENIOR VOLUNTEERS NEEDED for the new visitor center at Phinizy Swamp Nature Center to greet visitors, hand out literature and sell merchandise. Volunteers are asked to commit one Saturday or Sunday per month, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. or 1-5 p.m. Call 828-2109 for information.

AIKEN PARKS AND RECREATION offers a multitude of programs for senior adults, including bridge clubs, fitness classes, canasta clubs, line dancing, racquetball, arts and crafts, tennis and excursions. For more information, call (803) 642-7631.

NOW OPEN...

Hot Foods

by Calvin Voted Best Down Home Cooking Five Years in a Row. Formerly of Calvert’s and Augusta Country Club.

34

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

“I’m glad I got where I am today on my own, through my own hard work.

But it still would have been nice to have had back-up in the form of investment capital.”

-Calvin Green, owner, Hot Foods by Calvin, featured in The Business Observer’s November, 2003 article, In The Minority.

like none other — full-service luxury immersed in the old world tradition.

Massage • Hydrotherapy • Hair Nails • Facials • Body Treatments

CATERING SERVICES • DINE IN • TAKE OUT • DELIVERY

706-738-5666

www.hotfoodsbycalvin.com Open 7 days a week 8am to 11pm 2027 Broad Street • Augusta, GA

Call 706.210.5335

to experience Georgia’s Newest Treasure 608 Ponder Place, Evans 30809 Just Off Belair Road

THE ACADEMY FOR LIFELONG LEARNING offers lectures, courses, field trips, discussion groups and community information seminars on a variety of topics to mature adults. For more information, contact the USCAiken Office of Continuing Education at (803) 641-3288.

THE SENIOR CITIZENS COUNCIL OF GREATER AUGUSTA AND THE CSRA offers a variety of classes, including ballroom dance, aerobics, quilting, tai chi, Spanish, line dancing, bowling, bridge, computers, drama club/readers theatre and pinochle. For dates and times, phone 826-4480.

SENIORNET provides adults age 50 and over education for and access to computer technology. Many different courses are offered. Contact the USC-Aiken Continuing Education Office at (803) 641-3563.

SENIOR VOLUNTEERS NEEDED for new Docent Training Program at the historic home of Nicholas Ware. Learn the fascinating history of Ware’s Folly and the families who lived there. All interested should call 722-5495.

MEDICARE 2 SENIORS FAMILY INFORMATION FAIR May 1, 10:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. at Gospel Water Branch Baptist Church in Evans. Presented by the CSRA Regional Development Center Area Agency on Aging.

Call (706) 210-2018 or (888) 922-4464.

Sports FAMILY Y RECREATIONAL GYMNASTICS session held through May 14. Classes available for toddlers through teens. Call 738-6678.

THE AUGUSTA VOLLEYBALL ASSOCIATION is looking for new members. For more information, visit www.augustavolleyball.com.

THE AUGUSTA RUGBY CLUB is always looking for new members. Teams are available for women and men. No experience necessary. Practice is Tuesday and Thursday nights, 7-9 p.m. at Richmond Academy.

For more information, call Don Zuehlke, 495-2043, or e-mail augustarfc@yahoo.com. You may also visit www.augustarugby.org.

VOLLEYBALL OPEN GYM will be held Wednesday nights in April in the H.O. Weeks Center from 7-9:15 p.m. For more information, call (803) 642-7631.

AUGUSTA FLYERS TRACK CLUB invites area youth ages 7-18 to join the team. Registration is through May 15. For more information, contact George Taylor at 738-3737.

TOUR DE GEORGIA April 20-25 at Augusta Common.

821-1754.

AUGUSTA GREENJACKETS play at home against the Charleston RiverDogs April 28-30 and against the Savannah Sand Gnats May 1-4. Call (706) 736-7889 or visit www.greenjackets.org.

Volunteer FORTE INTERNATIONAL EXCHANGE ASSOCIATION is in need of local host families for high school international exchange students for the 2004-2005 school year. For more information, contact Tracy Klemens, (678) 358-5890.

month at the Pet Center, 425 Wood St. Orientation starts at 11 a.m. Volunteers under 18 years of age must have a parent or guardian present during orientation and while volunteering. Call 261-PETS for information.

THE KITTY ORTIZ DE LEON FOUNDATION needs volunteers to help promote organ donor awareness. For more information, contact Cassandra Reed or Espy De Leon at 394-0838 or kodfoundation@aol.com.

GOLDEN HARVEST FOOD BANK needs volunteers during the day, from 8:30 a.m.-4 p.m. Monday-Friday, to help sort donated products and assist in their agency shopping area. Help is needed year-round. If you are able to lift 25 pounds, can commit to at least 3-4 hours per month and would like to help fight hunger in the Augusta area, contact Laurie Roper at 736-1199, ext. 208.

RAPE CRISIS AND SEXUAL ASSAULT SERVICES at University Hospital will conduct volunteer training April 30-May 3. Call for info (706) 774-2746.

Meetings

Weekly OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS meets every Sunday night, 7:30 p.m., at Holy Trinity Lutheran Church in North Augusta. For more information, call 278-5156.

NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUP for relatives and friends of drug abusers. No dues or fees. The group meets Mondays at 7 p.m. Call for location. For information, contact Josie, 414-5576, or Lionel, 860-0302.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS: For more information and a meeting schedule, call 860-8331.

AUGUSTA AREA SURVIVORS OF SUICIDE meets Sunday, April 25 at 3 p.m. at Advent Lutheran Church.

Call 863-6785.

PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK VISITOR CENTER is in need of volunteers to greet visitors, hand out literature and sell merchandise. Volunteers must commit to one Saturday or Sunday each month, from either 9 a.m.-1 p.m. or 1-5 p.m. 828-2109.

THE CANOE & KAYAK CLUB OF AUGUSTA meets the fourth Tuesday of each month at 7 pm. at the Warren Road Community Center. For info visit www.ckca.homestead.com or call (706) 860-5432.

CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY NEW VOLUNTEER ORIENTATION PROGRAM the first and third Saturday of every

GAAC MEMBERSHIP MEETING April 27 at noon at the Walton Rehabilitation Hospital, Outpatient Classroom 1 & 2, close to 13th Street. Tour of Artists With Disabilities Exhibit following lunch. Guest speaker: Lisa Baggs, exhibit participant and owner of The Attic. Lunch $15.

For info and to RSVP, 826-4702.

GAMBLERS ANONYMOUS meets Thursdays, 7:30 p.m., in the basement of Fairview Presbyterian Church.

1-800-313-0170.

FOSTER PARENTS NEEDED for children and teenagers in Richmond County. For information, contact Luera Lewis, 721-3718.

SOUTHERNCARE HOSPICE SERVICE is currently seeking volunteers to perform a variety of tasks, including relieving caregivers, reading to patients and running errands. Training is included. For additional information, contact Lisa Simpson, (803) 463-9888 or 869-0205.

AUGUSTA SKI AND OUTING CLUB meets the first Tuesday of each month. Call (803) 279-6186.

THE CSRA LINUX USERS GROUP meets 6 p.m. every fourth Tuesday at Border’s Books and Music in the Target shopping center. E-mail augustalinux@comcast.net or call (706) 790-8439.

THE METRO AUGUSTA FRISBEE DOG CLUB to begin meeting the last Sunday of the month. Call (706) 210-8577.

Dogs and owners welcome.

MEDITATION & BUDDHISM meetings April-June at the UU Church of Augusta, Walton Way Extension, Tuesdays from 7-8:30 p.m. (No class 6/1.) Call (803) 256-0150 or visit www.MeditationInSouthCarolina.org.

GUIDELINES: Public service announcements are listed in this section without charge at the discretion of the editor. Announcements must be received by Monday at noon and will be included as space permits. Send to Events, Metro Spirit, P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914 or fax (706) 733-6663. You may also e-mail listings to rhonda.jones@metrospirit.com or lisa.jordan@metrospirit.com. Listings cannot be taken over the phone.

This Saturday, April 24

Handcrafted wooden sea kayak

demonstration!

Paddle Daze! presents

9:00-3:00 pm

Call AWOL for details

738-8500

Andy Jordan’s Bicycle Warehouse Reps on Hand

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Lake Olmstead Boat Ramp Test paddle all types of canoes and kayaks. Fun for beginners and experienced paddlers!

5-person co-ed canoe race with prizes! Children must be accompanied by an adult.

New to Canoes?

Free clinic 10, 12, 2:00

35

Bomb Epic

Hollywood

Flix Must-See

Boring

Comedy Sleeper Oscar Pick Director Stars This Rocks Famous Silly

Awesome

Masterpiece

Action

Cheaper by the Dozen (PG) — To

36

Fi r e ”

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

“Man on

make an old (1950) Clif ton Webb comedy without Clif ton Webb is a serious loss, but get ting Steve Mar tin — a vanillashaked version of Webb's snappish fussiness — is not a bad idea for "Cheaper by the Dozen." He's engaging as Tom Baker, football coach and father of 12 kids. Bonnie Hunt plays the wife and mom, Kate, looking awfully good despite the wear. The Bakers have a great life in a small town where Tom coaches, but he's hired to go to a bigger team outside Chicago, and the only story is the

Mirimax Films

Frankie Muniz, who is 18, playing 16 and at moments looks ripe to be 40, is agent Banks, a CIA operative on a covert mission to Britain. Kevin Allen directed like a giddy tourist, and the menu of Saturday daytime entertainment is served a bit more sharply than by the last "Spy Kids" romp. Cast: Frankie Muniz, Anthony Anderson, Hannah Spearritt, Cynthia Stevenson, Keith David. Running time: 1 hr., 24 mins. (Elliott) !!

The Alamo (PG-13) — Texans lost the battle of the Alamo but won the war and history. The new movie version, "The Alamo," tries to scrape off some of the familiar legend but inevitably reinforces it. And why not? The dramatic focus goes to the early Texans: Dennis Quaid as rude, hard-drinking Gen. Sam Houston; Patrick Wilson as young Lt. Col. William Travis, a reed who became an oak; Jason Patric as Jim Bowie of big knife fame, dying of consumption. Above all, dominating and entertaining, is Billy Bob Thornton, using his great rube's face and corncob charm as Davy Crockett. The frontier humor and bravado are in place, though the moving, violent climax inevitably lacks surprise. "The Alamo" has some rugged power and is good enough to make us remember the Alamo. Cast: Billy Bob Thornton, Dennis Quaid, Jason Patric, Emilio Echevarria, Jordi Molla, Patrick Wilson. Running time: 1 hr., 16 mins. (Elliott) !!!

Big Fish (PG-13) — The center of this film is stolid William

Bloom (Billy Crudup). Near the end of his father's long life, Bill is still peeved with the old boy for telling so many tall stories, for endlessly embroidering the truth with his drawlin' Dixie whoppers. Beneficiaries of his motorized mouth include wife Sandy (Jessica Lange), and Jenny, the woman who wanted him, a pinin' lady of the pines (Helena Bonham Car ter). The movie isn't deep or risky enough to earn the catch in the throat it finally asks for. But it has the appeal of good times remembered, and cute, cranky lines like, "Most things considered wicked are simply lonely and lacking in social niceties." Cast: Alber t Finney, Ewan McGregor, Billy Crudup, Jessica Lange, Helena Bonham Car ter, Steve Buscemi. Running time: 1 hr., 50 mins. (Elliot) !!1/2 Brother Bear (G) — Latest Disney animated of fering about a young man, Kenai, who is transformed by The Great Spirits into a bear. On a quest to gain back his human form, Kenai befriends a bear cub, Koda, and evades his human brother, who, not realizing Kenai has been turned into a bear, is on Kenai’s trail on a revenge mission. Cast: Jeremy Suarez, Joaquin Phoenix, Rick Moranis, Dave Thomas.

The Butterfly Effect (R) — As Evan Treborn, Ashton Kutcher is a floppy fishie with a hook in his mouth, and that hook is the script. Seems that Evan's dad is a deranged psycho with a "most unusual" brain disorder who, during the boy's visit to the ward, tries to throt tle and kill him. As Evan grows up, there are other lurid milestones. Evan has a breakthrough: Reading his old diaries, the pages quiver and this lets him mentally travel back to a past he can now change. In the middle, gulping like a caught bass, is Kutcher, aching with sincerity and technique you could call inadequate except that no technique would be adequate. The poor guy is caught, stuf fed and mounted. Cast: Ashton Kutcher, Amy Smar t, Elden Henson, Kevin Schmidt, Eric Stoltz, William Lee Scot t.

Running time: 1 hr., 53 mins.

(Elliot t) !

l rsa ive n U

”

Agent Cody Banks 2: Destination London (PG) —

Funny

Not Bad

2 e m lu

Drama

“Kil l B ill : V o

Lame

stress on the family from their move. The film is simple and obvious and plastic, but diver ting. Designed to be fluf f, it's fluf fy all the time. Cast: Steve Mar tin, Bonnie Hunt, Piper Perabo, Hilary Duf f, Richard Jenkins. Running time: 1 hr., 34 mins. (Elliot t) !!

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (PG) — Another Disney

dinky, turning the dreams of girls into piffle. Lindsay Lohan pitches her pretty charm like mad as "drama queen" Lola, who leaves New York for New Jersey (looks like a section of Burbank), wins a worshipful friend, dazzles a boy, squelches a snarky rival, and stars in a rock version of “Pygmalion” full of "American Idol" razzle.

Wasted rather depressingly are Carol Kane, Glenne Headly and other talents, treated as confetti at Lohan's feet. Cast: Lindsay Lohan, Carol Kane, Glenne Headly.

Running time: 1 hr., 34 mins. (Elliott) !

Connie and Carla (PG-13) — Nia Vardalos is Connie and Toni Collette plays Carla, minor show-biz dreamers who see a murder and flee Chicago, pursued by hoodlums. The girls bunker into a gay club and pour their dinner theater aspirations into becoming the headline act — as drag queens, way off mobster radar. Vardalos and Collette bustle with dress-up fever and can enjoyably oomph old musical whoppers from "Cabaret" and "Mame" and "Evita," so the drag dollies dazzle West Hollywood. David Duchovny hunkers sensitively as a straight bothered by having a transvestite brother, then guiltier about desiring Connie. Vardalos has the timing and go-for-broke vim of a show-savvy animal, and she can strip, frisk, kiss and massage viewers with simultaneous expertise. Cast: Nia Vardalos, Toni Collette, David Duchovny, Stephen Spinella. Running time: 1 hr., 37 mins. (Elliott) !!1/2 Dawn of the Dead (R) — Thanks to a

plague, the United States is taken over by zombies. It pretty much follows the rules found in the “Zombie Codebook”: If killed by a zombie, one must return as one. Once turned into a zombie, one must seek fresh blood. One must also go to the mall. (To the mall?) The good guys, for some reason, think that the mall is a pretty neat place to be too. Needless to say, forces collide, with the good guys deciding to make a run for it to a (supposedly) safe island. But first, they have to get through a sea of the undead. Based upon the 1979 movie “Dawn of the Dead.” Cast: Sarah Polley, Ving Rhames, Mekhi Phifer, Michael Barry, Linday Booth, Ty Burrell, Jayne Eastwood, Michael Kellym, Jake Weber, Kevin Zegers, Tom Savini.

Ella Enchanted (PG) — Is Anne Hathaway the prettiest girl in movies? No, Hathaway (she's 21) is the prettiest woman in movies. Her beauty and charming personality give some light weight to "Ella," in which Ella is really Cinderella. Ella is under a spell that makers her obey all orders — will someone please order Hathaway to stay pretty in better movies?

Cast: Anne Hathaway, Hugh Dancy, Cary Elwes, Minie Driver, Vivica A. Fox, Eric Idle and Joanna Lumley.

Running time: 1 hr., 34 mins. (Elliott) !!

The Haunted Mansion (PG) —

Another movie based on a ride at Disneyland, again featuring cheesy, story-altering references to the rides, as well as plots about ghosts and curses. Eddie Murphy is a workaholic real estate agent and a smooth-talking sleazebag. A promising real-estate deal turns out to be more than he bargains for, and his eagerness to scope out a house on the way to a family vacation leaves his entire family stranded at a creepy, cobweb-ridden Louisiana mansion with a curse. The result is a movie that, while consistently amusing, plays like a hackneyed ef for t to stretch a few minutes of ride into a coherent, hour-and-a-half story. Cast: Eddie Murphy. Running time: 1 hr., 39 mins. (Fu) !!

20th Century Fox

RATINGS !!!! — Excellent

!!!— Worthy

!! — Mixed

! — Poor

0— Not worthy

The Coalition for Mental and Spiritual Health Ministries

Amy Alkon

presents

A Service for the Healing of the Mind and Spirit Monday, April 26, 2004 @ 7:00 p.m.

Good Shepherd Baptist Church 1714 Olive Road Augusta, GA 30904

About the Service

This service is a community-wide event for all whose lives have been touched by mental illness, as well as for health care providers and caregivers. It is a non-denominational service and no one tradition is emphasized. Participants from Catholic, Episcopal, Methodist, Baptist, Presbyterian, and Lutheran traditions will be represented in the service.

Having

problems in your

relationship? You are not

alone.

~Reception to follow after service~

Work Hard, Play Lite!

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Augustaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Listen-at-Work Leader

37

lasts 200 minutes, and some of those are long minutes. The last 20 can feel like an hour, for clearly creator Peter Jackson didn't wish to let his saga go.

Bernard Hill, Viggo Mor tensen and Orlando Bloom are impressive fighters, and Cate Blanchet t makes a gorgeous Galadriel. This is posing, not acting. Sir Ian McKellen acts very well as noble Gandalf, but lines about hear t, courage and fate make him Lord For tune

The Passion of the Christ (R) —

Mel Gibson's risky, passionate treatment of Christ's last 12 hours, long on fear and gore and agony, devils (even Satan), sadistic and/or guilty Romans, hatefully smug Jewish priests and, above all, the tormented face of Jim Caviezel as Jesus. Gibson uses heavy, hackneyed devices and naive tactics; he thinks a few brief flashbacks to benign gospel episodes can offset and illumi-

are back for another adventure. This time, they’re on the trail of an anonymous masked villain who’s wreaking havoc on Coolsville with a machine that spits out monsters. All signs point to Old Man Wickles... Cast: Freddie Prinze Jr., Sarah Michelle Gellar, Linda Cardellini, Peter Boyle, Alicia Silverstone, Seth Green, Matthew Lillard.

13 Going on 30 (PG-13) — A 13year-old girl desperate to grow up makes a wish to be an adult when her 13th birthday party is a social disaster. In this, the female version of “Big,” she suddenly finds herself 30-years-old and a big success. Cast: Jennifer Garner, Mark Ruffalo, Judy Greer, Andy Serkis, Kathy Baker.

Twisted (R) — Ashley Judd plays tough San Francisco cop Jessica Shepard, recently promoted to homicide detective. Jessica picks up men in bars, then has fast, rough sex that has an aura of foreplay for murder. Sure enough, a series of her studs turn up dead. And Jessica, who is prone to drinking red wine in quantity, yanking her trigger temper and then "hearing voices," becomes a key suspect in her first murder case.

Just as the male victims seem to have "disposable" stenciled on their foreheads, to go with the cigarette burns on their hands, so does the film appear to carry the label Video Bin: Recycle Fast. Cast: Ashley Judd, Samuel L. Jackson, Andy Garcia, David Strathairn, Russell Wong. Running time: 1 hr., 37 mins.

(Elliott) !!

Stooges sound effects. This is one. Are there laughs?

Sections of the preview audience thought so. Mostly, these are less laughs (rooted in characters) than yucks (rooted in gags). These do not rely on wit. They spur an old sitcom laugh track taped inside your head from too many lazily filled hours. Cast: Bruce Willis, Natasha Henstridge, Amanda Peet, Matthew Perry, Kevin Pollak, Frank Collison. Running time: 1 hr., 31 mins. !!

You Got Served (PG-13) — Elgin and David are best friends who are serious about their hobby: urban street dancing. When another town’s top group challenges them to a dancing competition, the boys must create new, cutting-edge moves to stay in the game. Cast: Marques Houston, Omari Grandberry, Jennifer Freeman, Jarrell Houston, Dreux Frederic.

—Capsules compiled from movie reviews written by David Elliott, film critic for The San Diego Union-Tribune and other staff writers.

Warner Brothers

A trio of par tying bachelors from the ‘hood must curb their wild ways when they discover all three of their girlfriends are pregnant at the same time. Cast: Eddie Grif fin, Anthony Anderson, Method Man, Bai Ling, Paula Jai Parker.

Mystic River (R) — Clint Eastwood (directing) and writer Brian Helgeland heap loads of emotional freight on a slow, solemn barge of plot. Its core is a police case (Kevin Bacon, Laurence Fishburne fine as the detectives) about a murder haunted by a past crime. Sean Penn does furious brooding and manly weeping as a dead girl's father, Tim Robbins is a haunted wreck as an abuse victim, Laura Linney and Marcia Gay Harden are sidelined. From its por tentous title to its Boston Irish pride parade, the film aches for greatness and achieves high TV drama; the case wrapup is rushed and fishy. Running time: 2 hrs., 20 mins.

(Elliot t) !!

Never Die Alone (R) — Makes each viewer die alone, but shared laughter with other customers may forge a death-pact bond. David (DMX) is laid out in his bier, in pious mimicry of photos of the dead Tupac Shakur. He is also King David, regal drug dealer back in Los Angeles to reclaim his throne. But there waiting is Moon (Clifton Powell), a crime Caesar who has clearly seen way too many '70s "blaxploitation" movies.

King David sports fine threads but frets about his soul and quotes from the Bible. It is in David's Bible that white writer Paul (David Arquette) finds the soulful truths of the royal life after he is "offed." You'd never guess that director Ernest Dickerson did exciting photography for Spike Lee, so grainy, light-drunk and blasted by cliche is most of the imagery. This is not "street" but gutter, and every actor is hosed away. Cast: DMX, David Arquette, Michael Ealy, Clifton Powell. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. 0

The Whole 10 Yards (PG-13) — There are movies that could benefit from Three

o

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (PG-13) —

My Baby’s Daddy (PG-13) —

Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed (PG) — Scooby and the gang

the hero subject of 1973's "Walking Tall." Now there is Chris Vaughn, former Special Forces rock played by the Rock (Dwayne Douglas Johnson). The Washington state town to which veteran Chris returns has a new and gaudy casino not far from the sadly closed lumber mill.

The casino king and town master is blond and blocky, played like a Northwest Nazi by Neal McDonough. His goons also sell drugs, and after Chris' nephew tries some bad stuff, Chris goes on a bashing rampage. Soon, he is elected sheriff. Chris fondly remembers "the smell of fresh cedar" at the mill, and it is a grand slab of cut cedar he uses to slam heads, backs, legs and guts. The real love is that of the audience for Chris' indignant rages, his glorious and glowering ability to inflict mayhem while also trashing property. Cast: The Rock, Johnny Knoxville, Neal McDonough. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliott)

:M 2 o

directed, the movie is vacant of style and aggressively lame. You might pine for the old National Lampoon road comedies. Why do a black version of those formula pictures that is softer, cornier, more vanilla at the core?

Coming so soon after the dismal (but more amusing) "Never Die Alone," this marks a bad season for black cinema. But "Johnson Family Vacation" has nothing to do with cinema, and nothing of value to do with black.

Cast: Cedric the Entertainer, Bow Wow, Vanessa Williams, Shannon Elizabeth, Solange Knowles. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliott) !

Kill Bill: Volume 2 (R) — Uma Thurman is on her way to revenge, martial arts fighting and mayhem in the last installment of Quentin Tarantino's "Kill Bill." Tarantino jams a lot into his blender of martial arts mania, pulp and cartoons. He takes the Bride's revenge mission against murderous former lover Bill through its narrative loops, kids the lofty stature of a martial master, stages wind-whipped car shots and turns the Bride's lethal motive into female empowerment. "Vol. 2" has more story, more emotion, more breath-held quiet times to coax and trigger the tensions. For Uma Thurman, the Bride is It, the great vehicle for her giraffe sexiness and sly hipster humor.

Thurman has her icon role, incarnating the Bride with slinky bravura, but also feminine feeling. Cast: Uma Thurman, David Carradine, Michael Madsen, Darryl Hannah, Michael Parks. Running time: 2 hrs., 16 mins.

(Elliott) !!!!

The Last Samurai (R) — Tom Cruise stars as Nathan Algren, a heroic Civil War veteran and then embit tered cavalry man, reduced to heavy drinking and shilling for a gun company. Algren goes to Japan, paid to train the new imperial army in modern ways and weapons. But he finds himself drawn to the insurgent cause and almost idyllic life in the hills of samurai leader Katsumoto (Watanabe), who fights for the old ways and hopes to win over the adolescent emperor from greedy modernists. Having come to teach, Algren stays to learn. He is captured af ter impressing Katsumoto with his fighting spirit; the "barbarian" has a tiger within. "The Last Samurai" bides its time, has a predictable plot, but gives pleasure of a sustained kind. Cast: Tom Cruise, Ken Watanabe, Tony Goldwyn, Timothy Spall, Koyuki. Running time: 2 hrs., 24 mins. (Elliot t) !!!

nate the relentless flood of anguish and bloodshed, and he comes close to making this a rite of faith-based sadism. It is up to believers to decide if Gibson's Jesus is their own, but since no actor can truly act the Son of God spiritually, Caviezel becomes a sacrificial offering.

Cast: Jim Caviezel. Running time: 2 hrs. 7 mins. (Elliott) !!

The Prince and Me (PG) — It's about a fairy tale romance between Denmark's Prince Edvard (Luke Mably) and an American farm girl turned workaholic U. of Wisconsin student, Paige (Julia Stiles).

The plot twist is that Paige doesn't know that "Eddie" is a prince, who has gone undercover as an exchange student. They have a quick, coy courtship, with fun on campus and Ed visiting her farm home, where he learns to milk a cow. Of course, photo pests arrive, and duty calls Edvard back to Copenhagen, and Paige follows. We also get James Fox as the old king, wanly noble and happy about Denmark getting a commoner queen (the old queen, Miranda Richardson, has doubts). Cast: Julia Stiles, Luke Mably, James Fox, Miranda Richardson.

Running time: 1 hr., 41 mins. (Elliott) !!

The Punisher (R) — Frank Castle is a former Delta Force member and FBI special agent whose family is killed by the family of a young man inadvertently killed in one of Castle’s undercover missions. Castle vows to get revenge. Cast: Thomas Jane, John Travolta, Laura Elena Harring, Samantha Mathis, Will Patton, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos, Rob Schneider.

Unleashed s r e t s ” on

Johnson Family Vacation (PG13) — Comedy is long, laughter is short. Scarcely

Cookie. "Lord" is all epic, all the time. Jackson loves bat tles, which means hurling dense masses of mostly computerized fighters at one another. If the clima x battle this time is more overpowering than the Helm's Deep boggler in "Two Towers," does it truly deepen the story? Maybe it is just more spectacle, as clima xes are stacked high and then the epic winds down with Elijah Woods as Frodo (now mildly matured) exiting sweetly, his destiny done. Cast: Ian McKellen, Elijah Wood, Cate Blanchet t, Viggo Mor tensen, Ian Holm, Orlando Bloom, Sean Astin. Running time: 3 hrs., 20 mins. !!

Man on Fire (R) — Denzel Washington stars as a bodyguard hired to protect a child in Mexico City who’s received kidnapping threats. His relationship with the little girl reawakens his spirit, but Denzel apparently doesn’t make the best bodyguard, because the girl does get kidnapped, and his rage is unleashed on those he feels are responsible. Cast: Denzel Washington, Dakota Fanning, Radha Mitchell, Christopher Walken, Giancarlo Giannini.

The Missing (R) — Cate Blanchet t is again superb, as a flinty frontier mom who rides hard across 1870s New Mexico, chasing a mostly Apache band that took her daughter, slowly making up with her long absent and "gone Injun" father (Tommy Lee Jones). Ron Howard directed with a true eye for detail and landscape, Eric Schweig is an alarmingly vicious sorcerer, the brutality is frequent and not for tender viewers. Cast: Cate Blanchet t, Tommy Lee Jones, Eric Schweig. Running time: 2 hrs., 10 mins. (Elliot t) !!!

Walking Tall (PG13) — is "dedicated to the

memory of Sheriff Buford Pusser,"

“Sco o b y D

Hellboy (PG-13) — It was made by Guillermo del Toro, fan of Mike Mignola's Dark Horse comic book "Hellboy." Ron Perlman gets a big ticket to franchise status as Hellboy. He's a devil child born from a Nazi attempt (with Rasputin) to open the entrails of hell, yet raised by kindly scientist Prof. Bruttenholm (John Hurt), longing for sexy depressive Liz (Selma Blair) and amused by Jimmy Olsen-like FBI nerd Myers (Rupert Evans). Hellboy is huge, he's red. It's a movie for people (the guy kind) who can't stop turning the pages of comic books, who want life to be serialized. Cast: Ron Perlman, Selma Blair, John Hurt, Jeffrey Tambor. Running time: 1 hr., 55 mins. (Elliott) !!

Home on the Range (PG) — Life at an idyllic dairy farm is disrupted first when a snooty cow comes to live there and secondly when the bank threatens foreclosure on the property. A group of animals vows to save the farm. Cast: Randy Quaid, Judi Dench, Roseanne Barr, Jennifer Tilly, Cuba Gooding.

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Garner Has Some “Big” Shoes to Fill in “13 Going on 30”

By Joey Berlin

o

year-olds. I have a friend who’s 13 and I actually had a sleepover with a bunch of girls, and we stayed up. I was the first to fall asleep but I did the Ouija board and we watched movies, and we did makeup and ate gross food. They reminded me of how sophisticated your average 13-year-old is. Not that these girls were average, but how capable and adept and smart they are, living in the real world. Yet they get talked down to a lot. In one way, our society puts youth on a pedestal. And in another, we talk down to them. It was really important for me that I try not to do that.

Q: You have some emotional and complex scenes in “13 Going On 30.” Can you always get into the right state of mind for those even if, say, it is first thing in the morning?

A: You can if it’s a project you love, and luckily for me, every project I’ve been involved with the last few years I’ve certainly loved. There have been very few days on a set that I have not had a moment where a rush of energy happened, because of an interaction with somebody I’m in a scene with, or especially from a director. In this case, it didn’t matter how tired I was because I had Gary Winick as the director and he was such a partner to me. We both knew this was an important job for both of us and we really looked out for each other.

Q: You have a dance sequence in the film.

Does doing that dance choreography feel at all similar to the fight choreography in “Alias?”

A: It’s very similar, actually. Having performed in every musical I could get my hands on in my hometown and in every ballet that was performed in Charleston, West Virginia, for 15 years, the choreography wasn’t difficult. It was a joy. Really, that day I was on cloud nine. We had these amazing backup dancers and I had this fun little dress. There were huge cranes and cameras. It very much felt like the adrenaline and energy and happiness of a fight sequence, except this time I was allowed to smile.

Q: How are you preparing now for “Elektra?”

A: I’m back to physical training. I got up this morning and trained, and I am definitely in “Elektra mode.” If I flexed right now, you would freak out.

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

ne of the hardest feats to pull off for an actor is a convincing portrayal of gawky youth. Tom Hanks embodied it flawlessly in “Big,” and now it is Jennifer Garner’s turn to get in touch with her inner adolescent in “13 Going On 30.”

For Garner, the Golden Globe-winning star of the hit TV spy show “Alias,” the new, light comedy from director Gary Winick represents a major milestone as her first lead role in a major movie. “13 Going On 30” is a goofy and romantic modern fantasy about a 13-year-old girl in the 1980s who is granted her wish to grow up fast. She is suddenly zapped into the present day, which is where Garner plays her.

Now she has a grown-up body but inside she is still the awkward teenager, trying to figure out what happened and what to do next.

Born in Texas and raised in Charleston, W.Va, Garner had an accelerated childhood herself. By 13, she says, she had traveled on her own and was already the head of a babysitting empire in her hometown.

Garner will next reprise her superheroic character from “Daredevil” in a spin-off action adventure, “Elektra,” which begins filming next month.

Q: Was it easy for you to get in touch with your inner 13-year-old for “13 Going On 30?”

A: Yeah. I think we’re all pretty much in touch with our inner 13-year-old whether we’re willing to admit it or not, even to ourselves. She’s probably closer to the surface for me than most people. Part of the reason I took this movie is that I was talking about it with the cast and crew of “Alias,” just chatting about it while they were changing the lighting setup.

They said, “Jennifer, don’t be ridiculous.

You’re 30 when the camera rolls and you’re 13 as soon as they say cut, so you might as well get a paycheck for who you really are.” She’s a lot closer to my actual personality than anything that I’m known for, certainly.

Q: How did you give this character some depth to avoid having her come off like a caricature?

A: It was about letting go of inhibitions and riding the line between having fun with it and finding truth in it. I hung out with a lot of 13-

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“13 Going on 30” Is Mindless, Silly Fluff

By Rachel Deahl

M

ore than anything else, Jennifer Garner’s new romantic comedy, “13 Going on 30,” is a nostalgic plug for a gentler, kinder time … the 1980s.

The film, which begins with the awkward 13th year of its heroine, Jenna Rink, reminds us that life really must have been better when Madonna ruled the charts and off-the-shoulder sweatshirts were cool. Pitting Garner as a 30-year-old with the mindset of a teenager, “13 Going on 30” relies mostly on ‘80s nostalgia for laughs. And, although most of the jokes fall flat, the film is surprisingly infectious at times. Like the songs from the ‘80s that crop up throughout (including “Jesse’s Girl” and “Love is a Battlefield”), the end result is embarrassingly enjoyable and totally hollow.

The best parts of “13 Going on 30” remain the sequences in the beginning when Jenna is an awkward 13-year-old.

In the opening scene, Jenna waits in line to take her class photo, which captures her for the gangly, painfully ill-at-ease kid she is — retainer and all. Dreaming of being popular and pretty, Jenna tries to shape herself in the vein of the models she sees in her favorite magazine – a seemingly outdated ‘50s rag called “Sparkle.” But when her wish is granted and she wakes up as her 30-year-old self, she quickly learns that popularity and beauty do not make for total happiness.

Initially, “13 Going on 30” posits its personality switch in an interesting trope.

Unlike “Big,” where Tom Hanks wakes up as an adult with a clean slate in the same time and place, Jenna comes to in the world of her future; a world in which

she has turned into an evil woman. When she seeks out her former best friend and neighbor, and the only link she has to her past, Matt (Mark Ruffalo), she’s given an unpleasant tour of her life. Jenna went on to become prom queen, dismiss her old friends and become what she always wanted: A shallow, successful woman.

Now an editor at the magazine she read as a kid, Jenna even works alongside a former middle school bully, the scheming Lucy (Judy Greer).

Although Jennifer Garner never shines (like Hanks did in “Big”) as a childlike grown-up, she gets by with her goofy smile and overplayed eagerness. But where “Big” tapped into the mystifying way adults often act like kids, “13 Going on 30” never makes any interesting statements about life, aside from saying it’s better to be nice than mean.

Mostly the film fetishizes the ‘80s as Jenna demonstrates she’s as much a woman with a teenager’s sensibilities as she is one living in the wrong decade.

Whether donning too much make-up, an ill-conceived hairstyle or simply a mismatched outfit, Garner is constantly trying to reclaim her past in her future.

Less amusing, and believable, is when Jenna wins over a crowd of Manhattan party-goers with an impromptu dance number to “Thriller” or dishes out love advice culled from Pat Benatar songs.

It’s one thing to posit an attractive woman getting by on awkward, infantile charm, but it’s quite another to say adults are willingly and eagerly going to appreciate the line, “love is a battlefield.” Of course, what this film loves about the ‘80s is what it ultimately aspires to as well: Mindless, silly fluff.

reel time

Ella Enchanted (PG) Fri: 3:10, 5:15, 7:20,

REGAL AUGUSTA EXCHANGE 20

Movies Good 4/23 – 4/29

13 Going On 30 (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:10,

12:40, 2:45, 3:15, 5:15, 5:45, 7:35, 8:05, 9:55, 10:25, 12:25; Sun-Thur: 12:10, 12:40, 2:45, 3:15, 5:15, 5:45, 7:35, 8:05, 9:55, 10:25 Man on Fire (R) 12:15, 12:45, 3:50, 4:15, 7:00, 7:30, 10:00, 10:30 Connie and Carla (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:00, 2:15, 4:35, 7:05, 9:25, 11:50; Sun-Thur: 12:00, 2:15, 4:35, 7:05, 9:25 Kill Bill: Volume 2 (R) Fri-Sat: 12:05, 1:05, 2:00, 3:10, 4:05, 6:40, 7:10, 7:45, 9:30, 10:05, 12:20; Sun-Thur: 12:05, 1:05, 2:00, 3:10, 4:05, 6:40, 7:10, 7:45, 9:30, 10:05 The Punisher (R) Fri-Sat: 12:30, 1:20, 3:20, 4:05, 5:00, 7:15, 7:50, 10:00, 10:30, 10:35, 12:30; Sun-Thur: 12:30, 1:20, 3:20, 4:05, 5:00, 7:15, 7:50, 10:00, 10:30, 10:35 Ella Enchanted (PG) Fri-Sat: 12:10, 2:25, 4:35, 6:55, 9:15, 11:35; Sun-Thur: 12:10, 2:25, 4:35, 6:55, 9:15 The Alamo (PG-13) 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10 The Whole Ten Yards (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 7:25, 9:35, 12:00; Sun-Thur: 7:25, 9:35 Johnson Family Vacation (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 11:55, 12:20, 2:10, 2:40, 4:30, 5:00, 7:25, 7:55, 9:45 10:35, 12:15; Sun-Thur: 11:55, 12:20, 2:10, 2:40, 4:30, 5:00, 7:25, 7:55, 9:45 10:35 Hellboy (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:00, 3:55, 6:50, 9:35, 12:15; Sun-Thur: 1:00, 3:55, 6:50, 9:35 Home on the Range (PG) 12:00, 2:00, 4:00, 7:00 The Ladykillers (R) Fri-Sat: 9:10, 11:30 SunThur: 9:10 Scooby Doo 2 (PG) 12:35, 2:50, 5:05 Walking Tall (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:25, 2:30, 4:40, 6:50, 9:05, 11:30; Sun-Thur: 12:25, 2:30, 4:40, 6:50, 9:05 The Prince and Me (PG) Fri-Sat: 1:35, 4:10, 6:45, 9:20, 11:55; Sun-Thur: 1:35, 4:10, 6:45, 9:20 The Passion of the Christ (R) 1:15, 4:20, 7:20, 10:20 EVANS 14 CINEMAS

Movies Good 4/23 - 4/29 Man on Fire (R) Fri: 3:50, 6:50, 9:40; SatSun: 12:50, 3:50, 6:50, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 3:55, 6:50, 9:40 Kill Bill: Volume 2 (R) Fri: 3:55, 6:55, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 12:55, 3:55, 6:55, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 3:55, 6:55, 9:45 The Punisher (R) Fri: 4:40, 7:25, 9:55; SatSun: 1:40, 4:40, 7:25, 9:55; Mon-Thur: 4:40, 7:25, 9:55 13 Going on 30 (PG-13) Fri: 1:50, 3:00, 4:20, 5:20, 6:40, 7:40, 9:00, 10:00; Sat-Sun: 12:40, 1:50, 3:00, 4:20, 5:20, 6:40, 7:40, 9:00, 10:00; Mon-Thur: 4:20, 5:20, 6:40, 7:40, 9:00, 10:00 The Alamo (PG-13) Fri: 4:10, 7:10, 9:45; SatSun: 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 4:10, 7:10, 9:45 The Whole Ten Yards (PG-13) 9:10

9:25; Sat-Sun: 1:05, 3:10, 5:15, 7:20, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 5:15, 7:20, 9:25 Johnson Family Vacation (PG-13) Fri: 3:25, 5:35, 7:45, 10:00; Sat-Sun: 1:15, 3:25, 5:35, 7:45, 10:00; Mon-Thur: 5:35, 7:45, 10:00 Home on the Range (PG) Fri: 2:50, 5:00, 7:15; Sat-Sun: 12:45, 2:50, 5:00, 7:15; MonThur: 5:00, 7:15 Walking Tall (PG-13) Fri: 3:30, 5:30, 7:30, 9:30; Sat-Sun: 1:30, 3:30, 5:30, 7:30, 9:30; Mon-Thur: 5:30, 7:30, 9:30 The Prince & Me (PG) Fri-Sun: 2:20, 4:50, 7:05, 9:20; Mon-Thur: 4:50, 7:05, 9:20 Hellboy (PG-13) Fri-Sun: 2:00, 4:30, 7:05, 9:30; Mon-Thur: 4:30, 7:05, 9:30 Scooby Doo 2 (PG) Fri: 3:35, 5:45, 7:50, 9:50; Sat-Sun: 1:25, 3:35, 5:45, 7:50, 9:50; Mon-Thur: 5:45, 7:50, 9:50 Passion of the Christ (R) Fri: 4:00, 7:00, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 4:00, 7:00, 9:35; MonThur: 4:00, 7:00, 9:35 MASTERS 7 CINEMAS

Movies Good 4/23 – 4/29 Dawn of the Dead (R) Fri: 4:30, 7:30, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 4:30, 7:30, 9:45 Twisted (R) Fri: 5:10, 7:20, 9:30; Sat-Sun: 12:55, 3:00, 5:10, 7:20, 9:30; Mon-Thur: 5:10, 7:20, 9:30 Agent Cody Banks 2 (PG) Fri: 4:00, 7:00, 9:15; Sat-Sun: 1:15, 4:00, 7:00, 9:15; MonThur: 4:00, 7:00, 9:15 Mystic River (R) Fri: 3:55, 6:45, 9:25; SatSun: 1:00, 3:55, 6:45, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 3:55, 6:45, 9:25

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My Baby’s Daddy (PG-13) Fri: 5:00, 7:25,

9:40; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 3:00, 5:00, 7:25, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 5:00, 7:25, 9:40 Big Fish (PG-13) 4:00, 9:20 You Got Served (PG-13) Fri: 5:05, 7:15, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:05, 3:05, 5:05, 7:15, 9:35; MonThur: 5:05, 7:15, 9:35 REGAL 12 CINEMAS

Movies Good 4/23 – 4/29 Twisted (R) 2:10, 4:20, 7:15, 9:15 Never Die Alone (R) 2:15, 4:30, 7:00, 9:00 Mystic River (R) 2:05, 4:50, 7:35 Big Fish (PG-13) 2:25, 4:55, 7:40 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (PG) 2:30, 4:40, 7:25, 9:25 Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (PG-13) 2:40, 7:30 You Got Served (PG-13) 2:10, 4:25, 7:20,

9:30

Butterfly Effect (R) 1:55, 4:30, 7:00, 9:20 Torque (PG-13) 7:15, 9:05 Brother Bear (G) 2:35, 4:45 Cheaper by the Dozen (PG) 2:00, 4:15,

7:05, 9:15

Haunted Mansion (PG) 2:20, 4:35, 7:10, 9:10 The Last Samurai (R) 1:55, 4:50, 7:45

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Bugs? Termites?

CANDLELIGHT JAZZ

MUSIC

Comfortable Tunes Characterize Adam Hood

By Lisa Jordan

O THURSDAY

SABO & THE SCORCHERS

Friday 23rd and Saturday 24th PLAYBACK WITH TU-TU D’VYNE

Monday April 26th Tim

42

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

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Tuesday April 27th Pat Blanchard and Friends

Wednesday April 28th Pat and Adam

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pelika, Ala., native Adam Hood can’t get away from his status as one of Auburn University’s live music draws — but he’s not complaining.

“I’m from here, so the thing is, I’m kind of one of those people that are local,” Hood explains. “Most people come here anywhere from four to 10 years and they leave. Everybody that I meet says, ‘Man, I remember seeing you at Auburn.’ Even in Nashville. ‘I used to go hear you play downtown at Buffalo’s’ or something like that. You kind of get to know them, and then they move to bigger surrounding cities.”

It was the support of the Auburn community that initially kicked off Hood’s success. A selfreleased CD made the rounds on the campus, sparking demand for more material.

“I spent about $150 on one night of studio time,” he says. “Eventually, enough people started burning them for other folks and started asking me for burned copies. I thought I might as well get something that’s updated. That’s where the live album came from, the release before ‘6th Street,’ which is called ‘21 to Enter.’ As far as Auburn students go, they’re pretty much the ones that got me off the ground. When we go to these cities, that’s who comes out to these shows, still. It’s really cool.”

Hood’s four-song EP, “6th Street,” is packed with tunes that lean toward updated folk/country. “Tuesday Night” throws in bluesy hooks for good measure, while “Million Miles Away” and “Coffee Song” are more introspective works. Every song feels comfortable and almost familiar.

“Yeah, that seems to be what a lot of people say,” Hood says. “I’m not really one of those people that can come up with lyrics that are mostly over people’s heads. It seems like every-

Who: Adam Hood Where: The Hideaway in Aiken

body says that songs you can relate to are songs that work the best.”

And speaking of the familiar, the fourth song on the “6th Street” EP addresses the musician’s eternal struggle: Dealing with that guy in the audience who just wants to hear his favorite tune instead of the band’s original material. And it does so with style, a catchy tune and a great sense of humor. Hood and fellow musician Justin Johnson wrote it in under an hour.

“I have a lot of friends that are like, ‘Did you write that song about me?’ I probably did,” says Hood with a laugh. “I wrote that song about every one of my friends who’s ever asked that question. They know who they are.”

Hood’s currently sticking to the Southeast, where no doubt he’ll continue to be asked about Skynyrd tunes, but his circle is slowly expanding, thanks, in part, to the Internet.

“We really haven’t gotten any further out than the Southeast, as far north as Knoxville, as far west as Texas,” he says. “We put the CD on some online listening stations. We have the CD on Miles of Music and a few Internet sites that have opened the doors to places like Belgium and Holland. The Americana scene over there seems pretty big. No plans to tour over there yet.

“The thing is, it’s probably the most useful resource you have for people like me who are living in a small college town to get their music out. Guys like me, you can’t just go to any record store in America and just pick up my CD. Chances are, you can go to my Web site and if you like it, you can order a CD online.

It’s really useful and it seems to be one of the things that helps people like me get started without having to sell everything they own and move to Nashville or take a record contract that’s going to sell you short.”

When: May 1, 8:30 p.m.

Info: www.adamhood.com

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Talented Scott Holt Comes to Augusta

by Lisa Jordan

A

Fine Start Hearing Jimi Hendrix for the first time encouraged Scott Holt to pick up a guitar at the age of 19. His first guitar was a Christmas gift from his parents. Holt then discovered blues music before his father introduced him to Buddy Guy at one of Guyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s concerts. That came just one year after Holt started to play guitar, and the chance backstage meeting touched off a friendship thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s now lasted over a decade.

Who: Scott Holt Where: Andyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

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Flying Solo In December of 1999, Holt made the decision to leave Guyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s band and strike out on his own. Holt had made two solo records during his time with Guy, using his solo material as practice in between bouts of touring, and he decided to tour in support of them.

Holt had built up a sizable repertoire of original material that he felt needed to be heard. Guy gave Holt his blessing and the two remain friends.

Discography Holt has four albums to his credit: 1998â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Messing With the Kid,â&#x20AC;?

1999â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Dark of the Night,â&#x20AC;? 2001â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Angels in Exileâ&#x20AC;? and last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Chipped Front Tooth.â&#x20AC;? That album was recorded live in the studio in one day, and the title refers to the little imperfections that can make something more beautiful. Holt had decided to tour with the new material and refine it that way before recording it. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Chipped Front Toothâ&#x20AC;? has been hailed as an advancement for Holt both musically and lyrically.

When: April 30 Info: www.scottholt.com

Safe for the whole family.

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

A Trip to University Holt was invited to jam with Guy as a guest performer shortly after. By the time he was 23 years old, Holt was invited to join Guyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s band. Holt refers to his first professional gig as his trip to university and the best education he could ever have â&#x20AC;&#x201D; it gave him the opportunity to play with Eric Clapton, Carlos Santana, Albert Collins and Double Trouble, to name a few.

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music

CD Review

By Andy Stokes

JOHNNY

‘nuff said.

Widespread Panic — “Night of Joy” (Sanctuary)

THANK YOU

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

For Supporting Our Advertisers

Jam bands: that amorphous collective that includes any band, willfully or not, with a tendency to stray from the structure of their recorded albums when playing live. They have long touring schedules; are usually at their best live; and their back catalog is often littered with live albums (in the case of Phish or String Cheese Incident, those even outnumber studio albums). Allof this could be viewed as either a treat for fans or a gimmick to sell them another ticket to the same show they’ve already been to — a re-harvesting of ticket sales.

Widespread Panic could be guilty of this: Of the five or six live albums they’ve released, not all were worthy of being made into albums. It used to be that for a live album to be released, it had to either have historic significance (Johnny Cash’s “At Folsom Prison” or The Allman Brothers’ “At Fillmore East”), or be the only one in an entire career of studio albums. The Beatles never even released an official live album, and the Rolling Stones only did because they were so convinced of their

own superiority — and they were understood to be junk. Now it seems that the motive behind releasing a live disc can ruin the performance.

The second live Widespread Panic album to feature the energetic Dirty Dozen Brass Band (2000’s “Another Joyous Occasion” was the first; they also appeared on “Til the Medicine Takes”) was recorded during the band’s superb run in early November 2003.

The nine tracks here are taken from two shows, Nov. 6 and 7, but still have the feel of a cohesive set, since half of the album is a string of songs from one night and the other half is a string from the next. It’s likely that this album will be a memory jog for ‘Spread fans from the Southeast, since many were there to witness Widespread Panic again at their peak, having recovered from the devastating loss of founding guitarist Michael Houser to cancer just over one year earlier. George McConnell, formerly of Kudzu Kings, took guitar duties in Houser’s absence, and has been a mainstay since.

The album is, as the title indicates, a cause for Widespread fans to celebrate, given the rare appearance of The Dirty Dozen Brass Band.

www.metrospirit.com

s g tin

h g i S

Mel issa Textor an d Neil Stark at Last Call’s Par 3 Party.

Wesley Stewart, Greg Young and Jason Gucwa at Last Call’s Par 3 Party.

Tina Rank in and Cindy Mileaski at Last Call’s Pa r 3 Party.

Katie Carver, Warren Barfield and Amanda McLane at the Third Day concert.

den at Jodi and Marty Og ncert. the T hird Day co

urtney Bel l at Bill Davis and Co Cue and Brew.

Dawn D’Antignac and Dennis Boyd at Cue and Brew.

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Photos by Michael E. Johnson

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Nada Mussad, Rebecca Folge r, Patrick Rauls and Joe Weathers at the Third Day concert.

nd mie Grove a Ja , by us B n e . s, Krist Kristen Jone Par 3 Party s ’ ll a C st a pert at L C harles Wis

music minis

Oh, the Inhumanity!

What’s worse than a flaming Zeppelin? A reality show that chooses the worst singers among totally unsuspecting contestants who, in “American Idol” fashion, go on to compete for a record deal. The show is called “The WB’s Superstar USA.” It is to air May 17. This probably has something to do with William Hung, the most atrocious singer in the universe, who nevertheless won audiences over with his genuine

demeanor when he competed on “American Idol” several months ago.

When Music Meets Technology According to sources, punk band Fugazi is releasing all the live shows from their 17 years live on stage. Said source counts this as 20 live albums. Writer suspects that each “album” is from one tour, not one performance, but that’s beside the point.

Vocalist Guy Picciotto likes the idea of being able to have bands write in for copies of shows they’ve attended, but the technology has not yet been smoothed out.

For now, however, you will be able to visit Dischord’s official Web site and get hold of the recordings.

So Long, Lil’ Kim Lil’ Kim has a November date with a judge for allegedly lying to a grand jury. They were investigating a shootout that happened in 2001. Members of her entourage were involved. One count of conspiracy, three counts of perjury, three counts of making false statements, one count of obstruction.

COMPILED BY RHONDA JONES

Information compiled from online and other music news sources.

JAPANESE E SEAFOOD AND STEAK HOUSE - SUSHI BAR

Early Bird Specials Mon-Thur 4:30-7:00 Fri & Sat 4:30-6:00 Sunday 12 noon-6:00 Steak & Chicken Steak & Shrimp or Chicken & Shrimp For two $23.95

T

HE STROKES have just been added to the Music Midtown Festival which runs April 30 through May 2. The festival, held each spring in Atlanta, boasts an impressive lineup this year that includes FOO FIGHTERS, STEVE MILLER, GEORGE CLINTON, THE OFFSPRING, THE DOORS and Augusta’s own JOSH KELLY. Even JESSICA SIMPSON is on this year’s bill. One-day tickets are available for $40 and threeday passes are $45. A complete list of artists and other information can be found at musicmidtown.com.

air edited versions of songs such as PEARL JAM’s “Jeremy” and ALICE IN CHAINS’ “Man in the Box.” Williams isn’t happy about the current atmosphere in the radio world today. “I hated putting in the alternate versions of these and a few other songs we play but these days we have to be cautious.”

What about Ratt? Dept.

One might think that being on the road with AEROSMITH for several months would make GENE SIMMONS and PAUL STANLEY want to stay home awhile. True road warriors that they are, KISS is teaming up with POISON for an extended U.S. tour this summer.

Original members ACE FREHLEY and PETER CRISS have been replaced in Kiss by TOMMY THAYER and ERIC SINGER, the latter returning for his second stint in the band. Kiss also has their first studio disc since 1997’s “Psycho Circus” in the works as well.

Two Southern dates are confirmed with Charlotte’s Verizon set for July 28 and Atlanta’s Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheater August 4. Simmons’ second solo disc is released this week and features contributions from BOB DYLAN and even the late FRANK ZAPPA.

The movie is rather successful but what about the music soundtrack?

“The Passion of the Christ” sports a fine selection of songs geared to amplify the film’s intense message.

Artists featured on the disc include ELVIS PRESLEY, LEONARD COHEN, BOB DYLAN, NICK CAVE AND THE BAD SEEDS and THE BLIND BOYS OF ALABAMA. WAYLON JENNINGS’ wife JESSE “I’m Not Lisa” COLTER and son SHOOTER JENNINGS also contribute a track.

In last week’s column we told you about Eagle 102’s recent decision to air “censored” versions of songs such as PINK FLOYD’s “Money” and THE WHO’s “Who Are You.” The Clear Channel station isn’t the only local station to police the lyrical content of some of the songs on their playlist.

CHUCK WILLIAMS of 95.1 WCHZ-FM has made some changes too, as the highly-rated rock station has begun to

Irish popsters THE CORRS have been busy recording their first album in over two years, “Borrowed Heaven.”

The band has set a tentative release date for the disc for May 25 with a U.S. tour to follow this summer.

Turner’s Quick Notes THE DEL MCCOURY BAND visits Hiawassee’s “Georgia Mountain Fair” May 7 … Blues great the REVEREND GARY DAVIS has his classic 1971 LP “From Blues to Gospel” re-released this week … BARENAKED LADIES and METALLICA are offering various concerts on their Web sites that are otherwise unavailable in stores … BRIAN WILSON has his first disc of all-new material, “Gettin’ In Over My Head,” due this June.

Turner’s Rock ‘N’ Roll Jeopardy A. This local musician, now involved in various music ministries, was the leader of ‘80s rock band Mr. Funn.

Q. Who is Steve Cheeks?

Busy, Busy Beach Boy Though we don’t usually cover new musical projects in Music Minis, this one caught me by surprise. Brian Wilson, who rocketed to fame with the Beach Boys, is about to release an album, “Gettin’ in Over My Head.” It’s his first effort in about six years. He’s also been working on the final version of “Smile,” which was, long ago, to be the follow-up to the Beach Boys’ “Pet Sounds,” released in 1966. Back then, it was called “Dumb Angel.” The album was never released because Wilson had a nervous breakdown shortly after its making.

music by turner

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Sunday 12-6pm

Filet Mignon & Chicken or Filet Mignon & Shrimp For two $27.95 Washington Square Shopping Center

POISON

Next to Stein Mart & Masters 7 Cinemas

RESERVATIONS 737-4015

B Y

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T U R N E R

AFTER DARK

THE SOUL BAR HOSTS TWITTERIN G MACHINE APRIL 24.

Thursday, 22nd Aiken Brewing Co. – Moonshine Still Andy’s – DJ Andy The Bee’s Knees – Meditate on This!

Blind Pig – The Pat Blanchard Band Café Du Teau – James McIntyre Club Argos – Karaoke Contest Continuum – Playa*Listic Thursday Coyote’s – The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s – The Section Finish Line Café – DJ Fox’s Lair – Karaoke, Open Mic Greene Streets – Karaoke Honky Tonk – DJ Dougie Joe’s Underground – Pete Locals – Preston and Weston Metro Coffeehouse – Josh Pierce Group Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock

Modjeska – DJ Kenny Ray The Pourhouse – Karaoke with the Pourhouse Friends Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty Serendipity Café – Trend Shannon’s – Karaoke with Peggy Surrey Tavern – Sabo and the Scorchers Wheeler Tavern – DJ Flashback Buddy

Friday, 23rd Aiken Brewing Co. – Bellyfull, Salt Creek Andy’s – Arrhythmia Back Roads – DJ The Bee’s Knees – Projections and Selections Blind Pig – Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips Borders – Jeremy Carr Café Du Teau – James McIntyre

Charlie O’s – Live Band Club Argos – Kristina Foxx Coconuts – Bikini Contest Cotton Patch – Jayson Sabo and Michael Baideme Coyote’s – The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s – The Section El Rodeo – DJ Sontiago Finish Line Café – DJ Fox’s Lair – Live Entertainment French Market Grille West – Quiet Storm Greene Streets – Karaoke The Helm – Preston and Weston Honky Tonk – DJ Doug Romanella Imperial Theatre – John Berry Joe’s Underground – John Kolbeck Little Honky Tonk – Local Ghost Locals – Karaoke Marlboro Station – Dance Night

Metro Coffeehouse – Radio Free Metro with DJ Hot Saki Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock Modjeska – DJ Ted Fortenberry, DJ Kenny Ray Ms. Carolyn’s – The Horizon Partridge Inn – Mellow-D The Pourhouse – The Recaps featuring Sassy Brass R. Gabriel’s – Allison Foster Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty The Shack – DJ Chip Shannon’s – Bart Bell, Allen Black Soul Bar – Smells Like the ‘90s with DJs Bill and Hillary Stillwater Tap Room – The Avett Brothers Surrey Tavern – Playback with Tutu D’Vyne Wheeler Tavern – DJ Flashback Buddy

continued on page 48

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Sun 11pm-2am

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

AFTER DARK brought to you in part by T.G.I. Friday’s

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continued from page 47

Saturday, 24th Aiken Brewing Co. – Seepeoples Andy’s – Open Jam Back Roads – DJ The Bee’s Knees – Sweet Nuthin’ Blind Pig – Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips Borders – Chelsea Logue Café Du Teau – James McIntyre Charlie O’s – Live Band Club Argos – Greg Austin Coconuts – DJ Tim Cotton Patch – Forest and Jeff Coyote’s – The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads – Sidegrinder, 212 D. Timm’s – The Section Finish Line Café – DJ, Karaoke Fox’s Lair – Marlo, Karaoke Greene Streets – Karaoke Hangnail Gallery – Low Budgets, The Goons, Made in China The Helm – Karaoke Contest Honky Tonk – DJ Doug Romanella Joe’s Underground – Red-Headed Stepchild Little Honky Tonk – Livingroom Legends Marlboro Station – Bad Boys, Jonathan, Gouanni, Kelly Metro Coffeehouse – Live Afternoon Bluegrass with Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock Modjeska – Secret Society The Pourhouse – Black-Eyed Susan R. Gabriel’s – Shattered Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty The Shack – DJ Buckwheat Shannon’s – Bamboo Soul Bar – Twittering Machine, Hellblinki Sextet Stillwater Tap Room – Sassagrass Surrey Tavern – Playback with Tutu D’Vyne Wheeler Tavern – DJ Flashback Buddy

Sunday, 25th

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Adams Lounge – DJ Café Du Teau – The Last Bohemian Quartet Hangnail Gallery – Ateriavia, The Berlin Project, Conceiting the Victory Throne, Dexter Danger, Steel Train Marlboro Station – Barbara Barringer’s Birthday Bash Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty The Shack – Karaoke with DJ Joe Steel, Sasha Shannon’s – Fundraiser for Downtown Rhonda Brown with Shelly Watkins, Bart Bell, Allen Black, Saundra Powell Somewhere in Augusta – Ruskin Yeargain

Blind Willie McTell Blues Festival – Thomson – May 22 The Drive-By Truckers, Stewart and Winfield – Imperial Theatre – May 29

Elsewhere

SALT CREEK WILL BE AT

THE AIKEN BREWING

Monday, 26th Coliseum – Q.A.F. Continuum – Monday Madness Fox’s Lair – Open Mic Greene Streets – Karaoke Joe’s Underground – Happy Bones Mellow Mushroom – Open Mic Michael’s – Mike Swift Surrey Tavern – Tim Miller

Tuesday, 27th The Bee’s Knees – 12*Tone Lounge Blind Pig – Keith “Fossill” Gregory Coliseum – Tournament Tuesday D. Timm’s – The Section Fox’s Lair – Open Mic French Market Grille West – Wayne Capps Greene Streets – Karaoke Joe’s Underground – John Kolbeck Metro Coffeehouse – Irish Night with Sibin Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock Surrey Tavern – Pat Blanchard and Friends

Wednesday, 28th The Bee’s Knees – Heliocentric Cinema Blind Pig – The Blues Torpedos Coconuts – Karaoke

CO. APRIL 23.

Coliseum – Wacky Wednesdays Continuum – Open Mic Jam Sessions Coyote’s – The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s – The Section Fox’s Lair – Open Mic Greene Streets – Karaoke Joe’s Underground – John Kolbeck Mellow Mushroom – Live Entertainment Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock Modjeska – Theology on Tap: My Journey to Peace Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty Shannon’s – Bart Bell Somewhere in Augusta – Jayson and Michael Soul Bar – Live Jazz Surrey Tavern – Pat and Adam Veracruz – Wayne Capps

Upcoming Scott Holt – Andy’s – April 30 Adam Hood – The Hideaway – May 1 Honestly – Crossroads – May 7 The Gibson Brothers – Stillwater Tap Room – May 7 Garden City Music Festival – Downtown Augusta – May 8 DJ Baby Anne – Modjeska – May 14 Drivin’ N Cryin’ – Imperial Theatre – May 21 The Crooked Jades – Stillwater Tap Room – May 21

Four Tet – MJQ, Atlanta – April 22 Stereolab – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – April 22 Squarepusher – Echo Lounge, Atlanta – April 24 Jump, Little Children – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – April 24 Blonde Redhead – Echo Lounge, Atlanta – April 26 Yes – Philips Arena, Atlanta – April 28 Tortoise – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – April 28 Music Midtown Festival – Midtown Atlanta – April 30-May 2 Edie Brickell – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – May 4 David Bowie, Stereophonics – Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta – May 8 Keith Urban, Kenny Chesney – Bi-Lo Center, Greenville, S.C. – May 8 Doc Watson – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – May 21 The Shins – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – June 13 Atlanta Fest – Six Flags Over Georgia, Atlanta – June 16-19 AthFest – Various Venues, Athens – June 17-20 Vans Warped Tour ’04 – HiFi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta – July 28 Siouxsie Sioux – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – Sept. 11

Many tickets are available through TicketMaster outlets by calling 828-7700, or online at www.ticketmaster.com.

Tickets may also be available through Tix Online by calling 278-4TIX, online at www.tixonline.com or at their outlet location in Southgate Plaza. After Dark listings are subject to change without notice.

Deadline for inclusion in After Dark calendar is Tuesday at 4 p.m. Contact Rhonda Jones or Lisa Jordan by calling 738-1142, faxing 736-0443 or e-mailing to rhonda.jones@metrospirit.com or lisa.jordan@metrospirit.com.

Border Beer Bust This Weekend see page 20

Garden City Music Festival

Greater Augusta Arts Council presents

Saturday, MAY

MUSIC: 12 Noon til 11pm

8, 2004 at the Augusta Common

WYCLIFFE GORDON • COL. BRUCE HAMPTON & THE CODETALKERS

THE REGGAE COWBOYS • STEWART & WINFIELD • CADILLAC JONES DARK CORNER BLUEGRASS BAND • THE GOSPEL ORIGINALS PAT BLANCHARD BAND • WAYNE-C • REDBELLY • SHAUN PIAZZA BAND PARK BENCH BLUES TRIO • THREE SIXTY • CHELSEA LOGUE NOT GADDY'S DRUM CIRCLE

$10 adv

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15 n 10 & day of festi under F v ree al Food, D rink

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For Tickets & Info Call: 706.826.4702 augustaarts.com

Fetch Dog Treats - Surrey Center Metro Coffee House- Broad Street Serendipity - Washington Rd., Evans Pyramid Music- Broad St. & Kmart Shopping Ctr.

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

Ticket Locations:

49

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Midsummer Macon May 7, 8, 14, 15, 20, 22 . Dinner at 7 pm - Show at 8 pm $32 Off Post Civilians $30 Seniors (65 and over) Retirees, DA Civilians & Active Duty E8 and above $20 Active Duty E7 and below $15 Show Only

Please call 793-8552 for reservations and information or online at www.fortgordon.com Bring your photo ID to enter Fort Gordon.

Please call 793-8552 for reservations and information or online at www.fortgordon.com Bring your photo ID to enter Fort Gordon.

Saturday Farmers Market on Broad

FARMER’S MARKET IS BACK! SATURDAY MORNINGS

From the heart of Augusta, A unique market experience.

8 A.M. - 2 P.M.

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

May 1st - September 25th Located next to Health Central on Macartan Street Vendors, for more information, call 722-7245

A

2003 British documentary, “Fat Girls and Feeders,” debuting on Australian TV in April 2004, profiled an Arizona couple, “Gina” (once one of the world’s largest women) and her husband, “Mark” (who has a sensual or psychological desire that she be ever-larger).

Because Gina is apparently comfortable with her role, Mark is merely an “enabler” in the “fat administration” subculture, but more dominant men are called “feeders,” who may even “grow” their partners by pouring liquid fat down their throats. Gina once weighed 825 pounds (with a 92-inch waist), but had settled down at around 400. The filmmaker’s point is said to be that objectifying fat women is only somewhat more offensive than objectifying thin ones.

Florida’s Unruly Seniors In March, a 62-year-old man was ejected from the Spring Haven Retirement Community (Winter Haven, Fla.) after he punched one resident (age 86) and bit another (age 78) in a brawl over his apparent habit of foraging at the communal salad bar for his favorite kind of lettuce. (His 80-year-old mother, also a resident, conceded that “it did appear that he was playing with the food.”) And in February in Tamarac, Fla., the family of a 74-year-old man who died in 2002 after being sucker-punched by a 69-yearold man in a theater-line fight, filed a lawsuit against the movie house for not providing security, claiming there had been several other theater-line altercations between seniors.

The Sacred Institution of Marriage (continued) Saudi businessman Saleh al-Saiairi, 64, who has been married to 58 women (but not more than four at one time), announced he would soon take two more brides and was preparing to randomly select the two current wives he would have to divorce (March). And David Boyd announced as a candidate for the Canadian Parliament, from Halifax, on a platform of marriage reform, specifically to permit same-sex, group and human-android marriages (March).

Recent Wisdom From Newspaper Columnists • From a January “Parenting” column by John Rosemond in the Providence (R.I.) Journal: Reader: “I can’t keep my 20-month-old daughter out of the dog’s food. I’ve tried scolding, distracting, time-out, nothing has worked.”

Rosemond: “(F)rom a strictly nutritional standpoint (a nutritionist told me), most dog food is superior to the diets of many Americans.” “(A pediatrician said) he has yet to see a child who suffered ill effects from eating dog food,” except for chunk-type that might get stuck in the throat.

• From a February “Ask Dr. (Peter) Gott” column in the Herald News of suburban Chicago: Reader: “(M)y grandson ... told me that his fifth-grade teacher (a female) instructed the class that hand-washing (following urination in a public restroom) is unnecessary; urine is sterile.”

Dr. Gott: “Bless your grandson’s teacher.” “As a general rule, the urogenital area is cleaner than most other body parts are, and it need not be

washed nor should hands be washed after urinating.” “You and I, reader, are the products of our upbringing. It’s time to make a change.”

Least Competent Criminals Troy D. Nunes, 37, became the latest ordinary burglar to die at his crime scene. He broke into a Hollywood Video store in Quincy, Mass., in March by tossing a brick through a window, but a shard of glass remained protruding, and as Nunes was leaving, he accidentally slashed his right femoral artery and died of blood loss just down the street. However, another clumsy burglar is still alive (and was arrested in Columbus, Ohio, in March), despite apparently habitually cutting himself at crime scenes.

Columbus police said they had found what they believe is his DNA in seven different burglarized stores in Columbus and Cleveland.

Recurring Themes News of the Weird has reported twice on incredibly long daily commutes to work (a 25year U.S. Navy Department employee, 342 miles round trip from Trenton, N.J., to Washington, D.C., reported in 1992, and a 39-year veteran rural West Virginia newspaper carrier, 200 miles round trip, reported in 1996). A January 2004 Boston Globe profile of retirement-fund analyst Stephen Jordan described his 340-mile daily round trip from his farm in Augusta, Maine, to his downtown Boston office, but unlike the other two, who drove all the way, Jordan drives only to Portland and takes a train to Boston (on which he “get(s) a ton of work done,” he said).

Unusual Murder Defenses Raymond Rodriguez, 25, was found not guilty in the murder of a 77-year-old drinking buddy after he testified to having, at the crime scene, hallucinations of bologna and cheese dancing around in the refrigerator and, in the freezer, a green man who told Rodriguez, “Catch me if you can” (San Antonio, December). And Patrick Hutchinson was sent for a mental exam in February after police in Lexington, Ky., accused him of murdering his wife. Hutchinson explained that she had been taken over by aliens and that he (as one of only 735 “true humans” left in Lexington, out of 260,000 population) had to stop her, using a weapon supplied by a cobra that was speaking on behalf of God. Also, in the Last Month...

An American Airlines flight was canceled after the local Transportation Security Administration official ordered a bomb search (which proved fruitless) based only on information that he said came from a psychic (Fort Myers, Fla.). And a Chicago attorney was permitted to withdraw from representing a 75-year-old alleged serial bad-check-writer after he sheepishly admitted that he had taken a check from her for his retainer, but that it had bounced.

— Chuck Shepherd © United Press Syndicate

Brezsny’s Free Will

harmonies).” So which way will you go, Virgo: bland and classy like Jones, or rough and stimulating like DiFranco?

Astr ology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

Don’t try to rob a bank this week, Aries. The astrological omens indicate you’d have a very low chance at succeeding, and besides, it’s wrong. I also discourage you from buying hundreds of lottery tickets, selling your childhood collection of Barbie dolls or baseball cards or wheedling your aging relatives into giving you your inheritance before they die. The cosmic forces are showing signs of coalescing in a way that will bring you financial gain. But in my opinion they’ll only do so if you sit down and plot out a sensible, disciplined, ethical master plan.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

Your most important accomplishment this year has been a deepening of your capacity for love. That alone should inspire you to leap up in the air and sing a song of joy. More and more you understand that in order to get the passionate affection you want, you simply have to give the passionate affection you want. If you continue to expand your generosity in the coming months, Taurus, you will receive a flood of evidence about how beautiful you really are. That, in turn, will ensure that the influences you want to bring into your life will also be good for you.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

It’s molting time, Gemini. If you were a bird, you’d lose your worn-out feathers and sprout a fresh batch. If you were a snake, you’d shed your old skin to make way for the new. If you were a lobster, you’d slough off your exoskeleton because it was constraining your ability to grow, then replace it with a bigger version. So what’s your personal version of molting? Maybe some aspect of your persona needs to be cast off. Or maybe some armor that previously shielded you has begun to cramp your style. It won’t happen overnight, and you’ll feel vulnerable during the transition. But the process is perfectly normal; indeed, it’s essential for your health.

ACROSS

old MIG 5 Some degs.

8 Item thrown on a barbecue 13 Part 14 ___ Vista 16 Team subset 17 Certain Protestant 19 They get into jams 20 Santa’s wife?

22 Lots 23 Once-popular street liners 24 Marina sight 26 Architecture critic Huxtable and others 27 I.C.U. test 30 Library holding 31 Inlets

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

The DuPont company has patents on 17 varieties of corn. Yoga teacher Bikram Choudhury has copyrighted and trademarked his poses and breathing techniques. Corporations are acquiring private ownership of fresh water that once belonged to local communities. McDonald’s virtually owns the prefix “Mc,” and sues new businesses with names that begin with those two letters. In the entrepreneurial spirit of these big thinkers, and by the authority of the planetary gods, I hereby present you Cancerians with full possession of the Dionysian spirit, good for the next four weeks. Now go party harder and smarter than you’ve ever dared.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

Artist and filmmaker Andy Warhol was, like you, born under the sign of Leo. One of his goals in life was to blur the distinction between fine art and pop culture. The fact that his paintings of Campbell’s soup cans hang in prestigious museums proves he succeeded. My analysis of the astrological omens suggests that you’d be wise to imitate his method this week. In whatever way is most fun for you, bring high and low together; blend what’s sophisticated and casual; do experiments that synthesize the sublime and the ordinary.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

You have two options to choose from, Virgo. The contrast between them reminds me of the difference between two singers, Norah Jones and Ani DiFranco. Jones’s work is “tasteful and listenable,” said the New York Times, though “Nothing much happens in her songs.” ShakingThrough.net wrote that though Jones can be maudlin and subdued, she creates “a winning collection of polished (albeit innocuous) gems.” About Ani DiFranco, the New York Times noted that “It’s worth putting up with a few overbearing moments to hear someone so willing to take chances.” Billboard said DiFranco’s latest CD is “raw — for better (the immediacy of the performance) and worse (traces of off-key

32 “The Egg ___”

55 Dentist’s advice

1

33 Utility’s advice

56 Understand

13

to an excavator?

57 Word in many

business names

36 Yank, e.g.

A D O R N S

N O L E S S

I N A C O M E W E R W A I I N C S T A P I N

A S L L I T I S I D T S B T I T U G U B O R A O S I F M A N G E E D

L A C E

39 Bowl features,

for short

40 Kind of mark

Australia’s capital

43 Host 44 Make attractive

requests?

50 Region famous

for the blues

E A R T E A B A G

52 Oil holder 53 Miss. neighbor 54 Writer Murdoch

O I N K

R T C H A Y H I T T E R

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8 15

A D H E R E

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“Thy word is a lamp unto my feet”

9 Blues 10 1984 Peace

Nobelist

11 ___ Ski Valley

(western resort)

12 QB’s gains 15 Precede 18 Pregame ritual 21 Conflict 24 Produce 25 High points 26 Broadcast 27 Opposite of

vote down

28 Head of

28

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Puzzle by Jeremy Thomas Paine

29 1970’s-80’s

singer Vannelli

30 Group known

for pranks, in short

31 Steer

elsewhere

32 Showy bloom 34 Cyclist

35 Give a waiver

45 Additionally

40 Floral envelope

46 Low digits

parts

41 “The Scarlet

Letter” woman

42 Digital data

47 Architect

Saarinen

48 A ___ apple

43 Carry ___ (sing

49 Flat tire

44 Stamp

50 Telephone trio

on pitch)

indicator

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.20 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554.

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For Supporting Our Advertisers

51

Hollywood

27 32

34

Drake

12

You can call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your

23

33

7 Cartoonist

11

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

Geminis often get credited with being the most versatile sign of the zodiac, but you Pisceans are strong competitors for the title. These days, in fact, your patron saint is the recently deceased George Plimpton. That chameleon-like bon vivant, who had four planets in Pisces, was not only a writer.

He also performed as a circus trapeze artist and stand-up comedian, played percussion in a symphony, drove racecars, acted in movies and TV and competed in exhibition games with professional boxers and football players. Are you ready to claim more of your astrological potential with a Plimpton-like exuberance?

— © Rob Brezsny

21

24

6 Unfamiliar

10

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

John Goldhammer is a psychotherapist who specializes in working with patients’ dreams. Over the course of 25 years, he has concluded that there is one sure way to free yourself from a recurring nightmare: Stop running away from the monster that’s chasing you. The moment you’re able to change your behavior in the dream — to turn and face the monster, maybe even embrace it or give it a gift — the haunting will end; you’ll never have the nightmare again. I’d like you to apply this approach in your waking life, Aquarius: Turn and face the uncomfortable truth that’s plaguing you.

Maybe even express your love and gratitude for it.

19

18

4 Director of

Created Woman” star, 1956

9

16

30

8 Whence the line

51 Infinite

O R E S

6

3 Cut short

5 “… And God

42 Round part

H O M E L A A N N D Y A R R O OU R T I E V S E

5

22

2 Scoop holder

exercises, in brief

41 Western

C A D D Y

17

1 “Phooey!”

38 Knife brand

M A A M L A T S E T H A D L E N R A T I O C I N D T L E A R C H F I P A R G A S A S P

4

14

DOWN

une tête

I V A N

3

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

It’s time to update that pessimistic set of formulas known as Murphy’s Laws. In the old version, the rule was: “If anything can go wrong, it will.” The new, improved version, which you will soon exemplify, is “If anything can go wrong, it will, but in correcting it you will stumble upon a lucky break you wouldn’t have encountered otherwise.”

Here are other Murphy’s Laws to revise, Sagittarius. Old version: “Everything takes longer than you think.” New version: “Everything takes longer than you think, which is a good thing, because if it took only as long as you thought, you wouldn’t be doing it right.” Old version: “You will always find something in the last place you look.”

New version: “You will often find something in the last place you look, but along the way you’ll discover a valuable item you didn’t realize was missing.”

20

37 It comes from

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE H I P P I E

2

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Back in 1987, my life in Santa Cruz was carefree. I loved being an unemployed bohemian with lots of leisure time to write poetry and play music. One summer day, while working on a new song, I heard my doorbell ring. Opening the door, I found a man in a hooded trench coat aiming a slingshot at me.

As my knees collapsed and my heart raced, he lowered the slingshot, removed his hood and chuckled, “Made you flinch!” It was my Scorpio pal, Fred, the poet who loved to play practical jokes to keep his friends on their toes. He said he couldn’t stay — had just come by to make sure I wasn’t getting too comfortable. When he left, I went into a creative frenzy and wrote three songs in an hour. In the coming week, I foresee you encountering a milder version of Fred’s style of inspiration, which will unleash a similar burst of productive energy.

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

New York Times Crossword Puzzle

1 Marking on an

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

It’s time to rise up and fight back, Libra. Maybe there used to be semi-good reasons for you to endure the abuse, but they have become irrelevant.

Draw inspiration from the Brazilian crowds that beat up the sharks that were stalking swimmers at a Rio de Janeiro beach. Be as fierce as the Philadelphia schoolgirls who pursued and pummeled the pervert who’d been exposing himself to them.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

If you’re average, 90 industrial compounds and pollutants are circulating through your body. You also have the residues of 20 million advertisements and 200,000 televised acts of violence stored in your brain. That’s the bad news, Capricorn. The good news is that you’ll soon have an abundance of experiences that are highly effective at neutralizing toxins. I’m referring to encounters with play, delight and love. Rejoice in the fact that every time you grin, giggle or chuckle in the coming weeks, you’ll purge a nasty influence that had been sapping your energy. A single belly laugh could flush out 50,000 commercials.

The Advice Goddess

Amy Alkon

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52

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

AFTER DARK

GET YOUR FUN ON!! check out page <

47

I

’m single and looking for a boyfriend.

I’m not one of those women whose appearance is always impeccable. I just can’t seem to muster the energy to dress to impress for everyday errands. Today, I was at the dog park wearing baggy jeans in need of laundering and an oversized T-shirt, with frizzy-messy hair — when I saw this gorgeous man. I wanted to strike up a conversation, but I felt embarrassed about my appearance. Should I have gone for it and hoped that my personality would make up for my scruffiness?

— Dressed Down

Yes, it is possible to land a man without having yourself sewn into a sequined evening gown and airlifting in a team of hair and makeup rescue workers whenever you’ve got a library book to return. That said, the next time you’re about to stumble out of the house in a big, underwashed pair of man-pants and hair that looks like an homage to the Brillo pad, you might consider pandering ever-so-slightly to your target audience.

Men are attracted to attractive women. What, exactly, “attractive” is does vary from man to man, but it generally involves women who are unlikely to be mistaken for paunchy, middleaged plumbers named Clem. In other words, if you’re looking for a boyfriend, it’s in your best interest to invest that extra 72 seconds of effort to throw on an outfit that sends the message “Ask me for my phone number” instead of “Ask me for a free estimate on snaking your drain.”

Safeguard against lapsing into Le Look Janitoriale by presetting limits for your “Maximum Hag”: Your bottom line on how ugly is too ugly to leave the house. You might even try an experiment (call it “The Advice Goddess Challenge”). For a week, overdress instead of underdressing. Wear a halter dress and a huge, glamorous hat to walk the dog, and your dateslayer outfit to run out for a quart of milk. Look like the party, and the party might just come to you. Admittedly, party-wear can’t really compete in the comfort department with copper repiping chic. Then again, unless your idea of comfort is having a nice big bed all to yourself for the rest of your life, perhaps smearing on some Revlon and wearing a two-inch kitten heel to the grocery store isn’t such a high price to pay.

Launch an assault on your closet, and sell, give away at gunpoint, melt or burn anything you’d hate to be wearing while encountering a

gorgeous guy. Forget being a slave to fashion: “Oh, but everyone’s wearing body bags with little holes cut out for the eyes and mouth this season!” Be a slave to the facts instead — piles of data collected by psychology professor Devendra Singh, showing that men are drawn to an hourglass figure — and wear clothes that show (or give the illusion) that you have a waist.

Don’t despair if your actual body shape is more test tube or rain barrel. That didn’t stop the practically hipless Joan Crawford, who shapeshifted her way to a waistline by wearing cap sleeves the size of Mount St. Helens.

Curbing your tendency to dress like a rising star in the septic industry isn’t just about landing (and keeping) a man. You could be getting acquainted with your next boss, or your new best friend — if they aren’t too busy offering you directions to the nearest homeless shelter and a couple bucks to buy yourself a bowl of soup.

Sure, you can also approach them — as you could’ve approached the guy at the dog park — but maybe the best ice-breaker isn’t apologizing that you gave up personal grooming for Lent.

When I met the guy I’ve been seeing for six months, he was unemployed. He said he couldn’t give me the relationship I wanted, and encouraged me to find somebody who could. Now that he has a new job, I thought we’d start “officially” dating, but we’re still just spending the night together once a week. Is he stringing me along, or just not ready?

— Wait Problem The next time you apply for a job you don’t get, maybe you can linger in the lobby every day for six months, hoping they’ll notice what a bright young thing you are, and admit they made a mistake. Although, in this case, there’s no personnel department to send you a letter spelling out the terms of your situation, it seems clear you’re a temp. Unemployment aside, a guy who tells you “Find somebody who can give you what you want” is saying “I am not that person.”

Maybe if you try to linger in his bed for six months straight he’ll promote you to girlfriend by default. Chances are, he’ll just call security (the ones in the employ of the city) and have you escorted from the building.

— © 2004, Amy Alkon

Got A Problem?

Write Amy Alkon 171 Pier Ave. Box 280 Santa Monica, CA 90405 AdviceAmy@aol.com

To become a member, call 1-888-223-7044 To listen and respond to ads, call 1-900-226-8908 Calls cost $1.99 per min., Must be 18+.

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To respond to ads using a YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO SBF, 39, Leo, N/S, seeks BM, 38-45, downto-earth, very direct and straightforward, to have fun with. !582549

HONESTY IS BEST POLICY Sincere man, 25, works as a cook, and is looking for a woman who believes in honesty and romance. !122303 BLACK TEDDY BEAR SBM, 27, is looking for a Queen, who treats the other person in her life right, and expects the same in return. !123000 ELIGIBLE BACHELOR Businessman and entrepreneur, 44, 6’, 170lbs, N/S, N/D, serious, tall, tan, trim, talented, educated. Seeking exceptional SF, 24-37, for exclusive relationship. !115278 SPICE IT UP SWM, 31, with blue-green eyes, and a goatee, loves spicy foods, and is in search of a woman for outdoor fun. !992800 SEND ME AN ANGEL SWM, 39, 5’10”, 150lbs, mustache, goatee, shaved head, into hard rock, heavy metal.

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BY MY SIDE SWM, 51, 6’, self-employed, looking for friendship. I like movies, long drives, good times. You: SWF, 35-55, same interests, companionship first. !986387 EYES STILL BLUE 6’, 190lbs, brown/blue, handsome, chef, pianist, will send photo. Seeks pretty female companion, 26-39, no kids, light smoker/drinker okay, for traveling, dating, possible LTR. !882215 NASCAR FAN SWM, 39, 5’11”, brown/hazel, average build, Libra, smoker, seeks an old-fashioned WF, 21-45, for LTR. !932866 GIVE ME A CALL SWM, 43, 5’10”, 155lbs, enjoys cooking, movies, the outdoors, romance, laughter, good conversation, good company and more. Seeking outgoing, interesting, sincere SWF, 24-35, for friendship, maybe more. !989836

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Monday-Saturday 10am-9pm 2635 Washington Road | Augusta, Georgia 30904 | 706.738.7777 www.windsorjewelers.net HOW DO I SOUND TO YOU? Handsome, financially secure SWM, 54, enjoys the outdoors, long walks, swimming, dining out, biking and much more. Seeking intelligent, caring, trustworthy SW/AF, 3855, for friendship, maybe more. !960841 FRIENDS OR...

SWM, 36, 165lbs, athletic type, likes watching movies, some evenings out, dining, dancing. Seeking SW/HF, 20-45, slim to average build, same mindset, for possible LTR. !943034 VELVET TEDDY BEAR SBM, 37, Sagittarius, N/S, in construction field, seeks an intelligent, attractive woman, 23-45, with healthy full figure, loving, caring, affectionate. !936899 KIND, GENTLEMAN DWM, 49, 5’10”, medium build, homeowner, financially secure, enjoys cooking, gardening, reading and music. smoker, likes asian and black females, 35-55, for companinoshioo and possible LTR. !607612 GIVE ME A TRY SBM, 25, 5’3”, with a muscular build, seeks a woman for a relationship based on friendship, trust and fun. !993092 ENJOY MY TIME SBM, 46, 5’8”, 190lbs, looking for SB/WF, 25-50, N/S, likes watching tv, going to the movies, cooking. Friendship and romantic times first, maybe more. !945941 I GIVE GOOD LOVE SM, 28, 5’5”, N/S, Virgo, enjoys sports, bowling, movies, going out, quiet times.

Seeking a single lady, 26-34, same interests, for dating, possibly more. !957932

NEW TO AREA SBM, 41, 6’3”, 205lbs, brown eyes, handsome, Libra, N/S, ISO honest, sincere, fullfigured woman, 20-60, race unimportant. !928684 TAKE A CHANCE SM, 39, 6’, 240lbs, laid-back, artistic, loves life and trying new things. Seeking SF for fun times, friendship, casual dates and maybe more. !976288 ARE YOU OUT THERE? SWM, 56, 135lbs, athletic build, employed, likes movies, quiet conversations, gospel music, C&W, snuggling and good company.

Seeking SF, slim-average build, to share a lasting loving relationship. !979620 JUST LET ME KNOW SWM, 27, 5’10”, 165lbs, enjoys dining out, movies, music, conversation, traveling, romance, laughter and more. Seeking outgoing, intelligent, humorous SW/BF, 18-30, for companionship. !956434 PRINCE SBM, 27, 5’11”, 165lbs, enjoys music, travel, reading, dining. Seeking a woman who is outgoing, attractive, with similar interests for possible LTR. !954917 SEEKING SOMEONE SPECIAL SBM, 61, Virgo, smoker, likes reading, movies, dining out, travel. Seeking outgoing, caring woman, 18-55, with similar interests, for LTR. !850674 LOVEABLE TEDDY BEAR SBM, 38, 6’2”, Cancer, smoker, loves sports, dinner, dancing, movies. Seeking woman, 20-45, smoker, to kick up her heels with me. !938554

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M B D F H C LTR

Male Black Divorced Female Hispanic Christian Long-term Relationship

G W A S J P N/D N/S

Gay White Asian Single Jewish Professional Non-Drinker Non-smoker

53

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METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

BE MY TEDDY BEAR SWF, 32, 5’3’’, 180lbs, auburn/blue, no kids, never married, enjoys movies, sports, travel, dining, bowling, cuddling, quiet evenings.

Seeking honest, romantic SBM, similar interests, for dating, possible LTR. !894568 LOOKING FOR YOU SWF, 37, 5’6”, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys mountains, bowling, the beach and music.

Seeking WM, 35-48, N/S, to be a companion, friend. !456544 COMPANIONSHIP DWF, 50, interested in gardening, antiques and traveling. Churchgoer. Seeking DWM, 48-58, for loving, tender relationship. !732056 BIG GIRLS NEED LOVE TOO SBF, 33, Sagittarius, seeking single man, 31-45, for romance, real friendship, possible LTR later. Give me a call. !111717 NASCAR/ETC MAMMA DWF, young 59, 5’4”, smoker, enjoys all racing, the outdoors, reading, beaches, mountains, motorcycles, fishing, sports and more.

Seeking SWM, 54-65, with similar interests, for companionship. !989288 THE BOMB SWF, 18, with a full figure, seeks a male, 1825, who enjoys movies, dinner, for friendship and possibly more with time. !955355 SEARCHING FOR MR RIGHT SBPF, 39, Libra, loves church, traveling, movies, and dining out. Seeking SBPM, 3760, for possible LTR. !421273 MAYBE YOU’RE THE ONE? DWF, 52, 5’4”, brown/green, 170lbs, retired, secure, homeowner, loves sailing, cooking, gardening, shooting pool. Seeking considerate, pleasant SM who likes the same, for companionship and possible LTR. !980275 SEEKING HONESTY SBF, 37, full-figured enjoys dining out, movies, reading, music, laughter, parks, and much more. Seeking similar SB/WF, 32-50, for friendship, maybe more. !964698 FRIEND IN FAITH SBF, 47, Capricorn, N/S, involved with church, very creative, artistic, designs tile and cards. Seeking BCM, 44-58, involved with church, who loves the Lord. !707742 WHOLE LOTTA LOVE SBF, 33, would like to share movies, dinners, quiet evenings at home, the usual dating activities, with a great guy. !463610 OLD-FASHIONED LADY SWCF, 48, 5’3”, 150lbs, blonde/green, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys church, Bible studies, music, dining out. Seeking SWCM, 35-60, N/S, for friendship and more. !840939 ENDANGERED SPECIES SBF, 57, average build, independent, likes the good things life has to offer, fun to be with. Seeking SBM, 55-68, independent, honest and caring. !927805 CLOSER TO FINE SBF, 58, retired school teacher, N/S, enjoys traveling and tv. Seeking BM, 50-65, educated (high school at least, please), who enjoys having good clean fun. !909981

ISO CHRISTIAN VALENTINE SWCF, 61, outgoing, Libra, N/S, seeks SWCM, 59-65, with whom to share Christ, friendship, and laughter. Must be family-oriented, kind, outgoing, emotionally/financially secure. Let’s give our friendship a try. !911830 TALL BROWN SUGAR SBF, 25, 5’9”, N/S, enjoys movies, concerts, quiet times, and good music. Seeking WM, 23-30, N/S, no children. !906840 WANNA DANCE? SWF, 57, seeks dance partner for Salsa and Square Dancing! Any size, shape, big or tall, short or small, matters not! It’s the footwork that counts! Beginner-intermediate level. !898986 I WANT TO LOVE YOU SBF, 18, 5’2”, Cancer, enjoys writing poetry, walks on the beach, hanging out and enjoying life. Seeking BM, 18-24, who will treat her right, and expects the same in return. !880193 WAITING FOR YOU SB mom, 24, Virgo, seeks a man for days at the park, the mall, or at the movies, and spending time with family and friends. !883496 HIKER HEAVEN SWF, 45, full-figured, N/S, enjoys church, exploring, old movies, auctions, and gym.

Seeking WM, 46-56, N/S. Let’s make tracks together. !807679 ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE Honest SWF, 28, 5’10”, 210lbs, blonde/blue, enjoys classic rock, horror movies, and quiet nights at home. Seeking SW/HM, 18-40, for friendship, possible LTR. !874789 LOVE OF LIFE Attractive, classy, vivacious SWCF, 50ish, N/S, N/D, seeks SWCM, N/S, N/D, who is honest, financially/mentally secure, and ready for commitment. !875741 SIMPLE KIND OF LIFE SWF, 34, listens to country and oldies music, and wants to meet a man to cuddle up on the couch and watch a good movie, or enjoy other simple pleasures. !860787 JAZZY MISS Slender and attractive SBPF, 31, loves music, conversation, travel. Seeking kind, friendly, honest and family-oriented SBM, 30-38, for fun times. !865339 LOOKING FOR ME Female, 34, Leo, smoker, seeks man, 2538, for romance, real friendship, with similar interests, possibly more later on. !844726 DREAM GUY SBF, 29, searching for open-minded, outgoing SM, 22-38, military man A+, for friendship, fun nights out, dancing, talks and maybe more. !836990 SOMEONE TO LOVE SWF, 48, enjoys a good horror movie, a drama or a comedy. Seeking a man for romance, quiet times at home, or just dancing the night away! !832399 COULD THIS BE YOU? SBF, 45, 5’4”, full-figured, Taurus, N/S, enjoys church, dining out, reading, and quiet times at home. ISO BM, 45-65, N/S, for LTR. !810309 A VERY SERIOUS WOMAN SBPF, 34, mother of 3, nurse, independent and secure, enjoys church, movies, dining. looking for commitment-minded, level-headed, spiritual, spontaneous, respectful man, who truly appreciates a good woman.

Sound like you? !777612

To become a member, call 1-888-223-7044 To listen and respond to ads, call 1-900-226-8908 Calls cost $1.99 per min., Must be 18+.

,call 1-866-832-4685

To respond to ads using a SEEKS MAN WITH DIRECTION GBM, 33, Capricorn, N/S, seeks understanding, level-headed, secure GBM, 2548, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !854633

CALL ON ME SWM, 43, 5’10”, 160lbs, blond/blue, loves the outdoors, dogs, fishing. Seeking SW/HM, 21-35, similar interests, friends first, maybe more. !113631 DOGGONE LOVEABLE SWM, 37, Gemini, smoker, nature and animal lover (especially puppies), seeks outgoing, down-to-earth man, 20-70, for friendship. !909184 FUN TO HANG AROUND WITH GWM, 52, 5’2”, smoker, enjoys playing pool, having fun, seeks outgoing GWM, 40-55, smoker, with similar interests. !844895 ACTIVE SBM SBM, 49, Pisces, N/S, enjoys bowling, movies, playing sports, seeks compatible BM, 30-46, N/S, with similar interests. !846543 RELAXING AT HOME SBM, 35, Virgo, N/S, likes relaxing at home, fun, concerts, trips going to the beach.

Seeks fun, spontaneous SBM, 26-37, N/S. !532700 SEND ME AN ANGEL SBM, 31, seeking serious, open-minded, down-to-earth guy, 30-45, likes hanging out at home, movies. Friendship comes first, possible LTR. No drama! !111070 TIME AFTER TIME SM, 38, is an easygoing guy looking for another guy to spend time with, and share a good friendship. !993392 FUN-FILLED DAYS AWAIT SBM, 24, enjoys taking trips, nice restaurants, fun evenings, dancing, quality time together. Seeking masculine SBM, 20-55, for possible relationship. !894435 TAKE A CHANCE GWM, 43, 6’2”, 195lbs, black brown, seeks other GWM, for fun times and maybe something more. !493530 IS IT YOU? Simple, easygoing SM, 47, enjoys bowling, music, cooking, more. Seeking outgoing lady for good times, talks, friendship and possible LTR. !975288 EASY TO TALK TO SWM, 48, loves good Italian or French cuisine, and is looking for a man who is easy to get along with, for romance. !870126 GLOVERVILLE GUY GWM, Capricorn, N/S, loves bars, karaoke, cooking out, and pool. Seeking GWM, 2849, smoker, to cuddle up with. !936256 LET’S SADDLE UP SWM, 27, 5’8”, brown/brown, Virgo, smoker, loves horses, camping (with or without the horses), and traveling. Seeking man, 25-40, who can ride, ride, ride. !921725 LOOKING FOR COOL CAT... to converse with. SBM, 34, Capricorn, N/S, game and drama-free, seeks BM, 26-48, serious-minded, with sense of direction in life. !889038 LET’S GET TOGETHER GWPM, 37, 5’9”, brown/brown, who enjoys reading, movies, politics, entertainment, seeks a guy for dating, possibly growing into more. !883365 I WANT TO MEET YOU! GBM, 32, 5’7”, average build, Pisces, N/S, likes reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports. Seeking outgoing, caring GWM, 2445, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !850885

54

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

How do you

INTERESTED? Independent SWM, 37, 5’8”, 150lbs, brown/brown, would like to meet fun-loving, honest, real, professional, secure female to share dates, talks, walks, dinners and romance. !848764 GREAT PERSONALITY SBM, 18, 6’3”, 220lbs, masculine build, seeking SBM, 18-29, very masculine, energetic, fun-loving, to go out for dinners, walks and more. !627150 LET’S MEET FOR COFFEE Good-looking GWM, 36, 6’, 200lbs, muscular, tan, enjoys working out, yard work, spending time with my dogs. Looking for attractive SM, 32-48, for dating, maybe leading to LTR. !436231

INTERESTED? SBF, 35, loves reading (Stephen King and Anne Rice), listening to alternative music, as well as jazz. Seeking a woman with similar tastes. !990549 © 2004 TPI GROUP

KINDRED SPIRITS SBM, 54, 5’7”, average build, local truck driver, Taurus, marriage-minded, smoker, seeks BF, 42-60, a kind soul. !928892 LOVES TO MAKE YOU LAUGH SBM, 37, 5’8”, slim build, Aquarius, smoker, disc jockey and pest control technician, seeks woman, 25-41, just as a friend. !939056 LET ME LOVE YOU SWM, 37, 6’, 200lbs, Cancer, N/S, in construction work, loves camping. Looking to meet a nice WF, 40-60, with whom to share what lovers do. !908620 NO MORE GAMES SWM, 34, 6’4”, 190lbs, is in great shape, and is looking for a woman who keeps herself healthy and believes in honesty. !955377 ME AND MISS LADY SBM, 38, 6’1”, professional cook, likes sports, looking for a lady, 28-42, likes quiet times, walks in the park, family, fun. Does this sound like you? !951742 WHAT A CATCH Slim SBM, 22, 5’10”, green eyes, looking for a laid-back, cool girl, 18-29, very attractive, open mind. Let’s talk. !952108 MUCH TO OFFER SHM, 58, 5’10”, 185lbs, salt-n-pepper hair, retired, Virgo, N/S, loves trailer camping, mountains, beaches. Seeking WF, 48-62, N/S, retired a+. !937107 A LITTLE TLC DWM, 49, 5’11”, 195lbs, homeowner, financially secure, enjoys cooking, home life, motorcycle riding. Looking for attractive WF, 35-50, with similar interests. !938440 TO THE POINT SBM, 20, 5’11”, Libra, smoker, loves hanging out with friends and listening to music.

Seeking a real woman, 20s, free of games. !924941 CULTURED SWM, 31, 5’6”, athletic build, Cancer, N/S, would like to meet an athletic, energetic woman, 21-55, N/S. !926395 YOU NEVER KNOW... where this could lead. SBM, 24, Pisces, smoker, seeks BF, 20-30, for friendship, perhaps casual dating. !926708 PLEASE, PLEASE ME SWM, 32, N/S, N/D, is looking for a woman, 27-35, with a petite build, to share good times, conversations and maybe more. !871092 SEEKING ADVENTURE SWPM, 44, 6’2”, slender, Sagittarius, smoker, loves to travel. Seeking woman, 18-30, slender or average-sized. !910584 I LOVE MY DOG... but I can’t take her to the movies. Puerto Rican SHM, 22, 5’9”, long curly (sometimes braided) hair, smoker, works in collections.

Seeking BF, 18-40, for friendship, possible romance. !914936 LET’S TALK! SBM, 19, 6’, 145lbs, looking for a female, 18-29, who is down-to-earth, knows how to have fun! !900587 GIVE ME A CALL SWM, 40, 5’8”, 185lbs, salt-n-pepper/green, N/S, enjoys fishing, horseback riding, stargazing, martial arts, reading, quiet times home. Seeking that special woman to share life, laughs and maybe love. !834688 WELL-ROUNDED MAN Educated SBPM, 41, 5’11”, loves reading, working out, the arts, dining out, travel, quiet times. Would like to meet SWF, 30-45, with similar interests, for fun, friendship, and maybe more. !442021

GOOD COMPANY SBF, 27, wants to meet a friend for hanging out, shopping, having fun and enjoying good company. !990953 1 YOU’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR BiWF, 27, enjoys everything, promises you won’t regret it. If you’re looking for a good time and friendship, I’ll be perfect for you. !830500 JUST THE FACTS SBPF, 41, Libra, N/S, seeks PF, age and race unimportant, who enjoys dining out, quiet times at home, and movies, for LTR. !730225 WHY NOT CALL? SBF, 41, seeks goal-oriented, caring SBF with children ok, for friendship, dating and possible relationship. !976521 SOMETHING SPECIAL DWF, 45, 5’8”, 145lbs, two kids at home, loves heavy metal music. Seeking SWF, 3050, likes being around kids, for possible LTR. !945525 AFRICAN-AMERICAN STUD Open-minded, spontaneous, laid-back SBF, 23, Pisces, N/S, loves R&B and old-school music. Seeking feminine woman, 25-50, race not important, who loves to have fun. !919677 READY TO HAVE FUN! SF, 25, seeks femme, 25-35, race not important, who is nice, pretty, slim. Let’s talk and get to know one another! !895256

WAITING FOR YOU SBF, 19, is in search of a friend first, maybe more with time, with a lady who likes to get out and have fun. !874312 ONLY A WOMAN WILL KNOW GBF, Capricorn, N/S, likes reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports. Seeking outgoing, caring GWF, 27-52, N/S, with similar interests, for dating and more. !850614 THE SWEETEST THING SBF, 26, 5’8”, 145lbs, wants to get out and have fun with a new friend, maybe more with time. !832018 PLAYS GUITAR, WRITES... poetry, and rollerblades.

NativeAmerican/African-American female, 18, 5’5”, 117lbs, very toned, laid-back, a goofball at times, N/S, seeks woman, 18-29. !818596 BONEVILLE BABE SWF, 31, 5’5”, 130lbs, brown/green, smoker, enjoys playing golf, movies, and picnics at the lake. Seeking WF, 25-40, for friends, possibly more. !818908 GET TO KNOW ME SBF, 25, Taurus, N/S, enjoys movies, travel.

Seeking woman, 21-30, N/S, for friendship, possible romance. !803723 A LOT TO OFFER Non-smoking GBF, 37, N/S, seeks very attractive, unique, romantic, fun, intelligent, feminine GF, 27-37, for friendship, dating, possibly more. !749660 WHY WAIT? SWF, 38, 5’6”,140lbs, short brown hair, easygoing, enjoys playing golf, the beach.

Seeking feminine female, 20-40, to have fun times and more. !448489

Chemistry 101

SWF+SPM=LTR

Mix up a little chemistry this spring.

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Classifieds Alt. Lifestyles

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Mind, Body & Spirit

Pilates

Do you need to Forgive Someone?

Perhaps you should try

RADICAL Forgiveness

Let go of the past and create a new Positive Future.

An Easy, Step-by-Step Process that really works!

Positive Image Awareness Center, Inc. 116 Shaw Street, Martinez, GA 30907 (706) 210-4849 | www.RadicalForgiveness.com

THE COLISEUM

Premier Entertainment Complex & High Energy Dance Music

Saturday, April 24th Petite

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! !

FRI & SAT $1.00 Well Drinks $1.00 Domestic From 9 pm - 11 pm WED FREE Well Drinks FREE Draft Drinks

Open Mon-Fri 8pm-3am Sat 8pm-2:30am

Fri & Sat. No Cover Before 10 p.m.

1632 Walton Way • Augusta, GA

706-733-2603

POSITIVE IMAGE AWARENESS CENTER, INC

Aiken’s Ultimate Dance Club ! !

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$1.00 D ra Every N ft ight All Nigh t

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INTERNATIONALLY KNOWN SPIRITUAL COUNSELOR DARLEN-DE

Services

IS NOW OFFERING SPIRITUAL COUNSELING AND HYPNOSIS AT OUR NEW ADDRESS:

Poor Water Drainage?

!

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116 SHAW STREET MARTINEZ, GA 30907 TheAwarenessCtr@aol.com www.spiritualwarriors.net

STARLIGHT CABARET

706-210-4849

FRI - Dance Night SAT - Bad Boys Johnathan, Govanni & Kelly SUN- Barbara Barringer’s Birthday Bash

Music

READINGS BY

MRS. GRAHAM

141 Marlboro Street, N.E. Aiken S.C. • 803-644-6485

DOORS OPEN AT 9:00 • 18 to Party • 21 to Drink

C A R D R E A D I N G S

Mrs. Graham, Psychic Reader, Advises on all affairs of life, such as love, marriage, and business. She tells your past, present and future. Mrs. Graham does palm, tarot card, and Chakra balancing. She specializes in relationships and reuniting loved ones.

341 S. Belair Rd. Open from 9 a.m. til 9 p.m.

Call (706) 733-5851

Equipment WOLFF TANNING BEDS

• French Drains • Gutter Drains • Catch Basins • Erosion Control • Waterproofing • Crawl Space

GUARANTEED SOLUTIONS

>> No Cover With This Ad <<

Email: ColiseumAugusta@aol.com

SPECIAL READINGS WITH CARD

Friday, April 23rd Party Monster w/ Claire Storm

MARLBORO STATION

Steven D. Kaplan Radical Forgiveness Coach

AFFORDABLE • CONVENIENT Tan At Home Payments From $29/month FREE Color Catalog Call Today 1-800-781-5173 (04/15#8373)

Email your classified ad to classified@metrospirit.com Tanning

T A N N I N G

S A L O N

9 WOLF TANNING BEDS THE CYCLONE & AIRBRUSHING

Kroger Shopping Center Across from the Augusta Mall

706-667-0120 www.sandsofsummer.com

General Help Wanted 59 People needed to lose weight!

All natural, doctor recommended 100% Guaranteed Call for free sample, 706-284-7650 (04/22#8368) $250 - $500 a Week Will train to work at home Helping the US Government file HUD/FHA mor tgage refunds No experience necessary Call 1-800-778-0353 (04/22#8426)

www.metrospirit.com

Private Investigator Premier Investigations •Domestic •Child Custody •Surveillance •Background Checks 706-869-1667 (04/22#8419)

Call 738-1142 to place your Classified ad!

Religion Meditation & Buddhism Weekly Classes, Tuesdays, 7-8:30pm, April-June 22nd at the Unitarian Church of Augusta, 3501 Walton Way Ex tension, Ganden Buddhist Center, Everyone is welcome!

(No Class 4/20 & 6/1) Call (803) 256-0150 or www.MeditationInSouthCarolina.org for more info.

(04/22#8425) Metropolitan Community Church of Our Redeemer A Christian Church reaching to all: including Gay, Lesbian, and Transgendered Christians.

Meeting at 557 Greene Street, 11 am and 6 pm each Sunday. 722-6454 MCCOurRedeemer@aol.com www.mccoor.com (04/22#8128)

Real Estate Homes for Rent Savannah Lakes Village Rental Home New 3 br, 2 ba House for rent.

No pets. Call 843-251-8886 or email, erogers2@sc.rr.com (04/22#8421)

Love’s Wedding Chapel All types of ceremonies NO BLOOD TEST!!!!

NO WAITING PERIOD!!!!

Love & Light Healing Center 2477 Wrightsboro Road 706-733-8550 or cell 951-1300 (04/22#8370)

Telephone Service Unlimited Long-Distance & Local Calling One Price, One Bill, One Company Keep Your Same Phone # Reps Needed Call 1-800-392-4050 Eula NEX X Independent Rep www.nex xrep.com/134741 (04/22#8406)

Travel

We want your dead junk or scrap car bodies.

We tow away and for some we pay.

706/829-2676

55

Open 7 Days a Week (Peak Season)

Diamond Massage Therapy Dr. Scot tie Diamond and our qualified staff of professionals offer in home massage therapy, migraine relief, pedicures, manicures, & acne treatments. Your first acne treatment is free. We come to you at your convenience.

Call 803-827-9300 (04/22#8405)

706-869-9988

www.sundownconstruction.com

METRO SPIRIT - APRIL 22, 2004

“Ain’t No Line On My Behind”

Full Body Massage!

Therapeutic tension relief, intense or tender touch, relaxing music, aromatherapy, by appointment only - $49.00/hr.

Call Joy - 706-771-9470 or John - 803-361-8811 (04/22#8408)

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Wheels

Dead Bodies Wanted OR

706/798-9060

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