Metro Spirit 05.06.2004

May 6-12 Vol. 15 No. 40

Augusta’s Independent Voice

Movies

by Mail:

NETFLIX Page 19

Artists or Vandals?

Page 14

“

Am I Crazy?

I’m offering my $189 Air Conditioner Super-Tune-Up™ for only $79 ... and I guarantee your system won’t break down this Summer or my service is FREE!

2

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

I must be crazy! When the temperature increases, I can get pretty busy. So, why am I offering such a drastic discount on my Super-Tune-Ups? It’s very simple. I want you as a client for life! So, I call this my INVESTMENT IN YOU! I know that I run the tightest service company in the business. I belong to a National Organization of highly motivated and technically competent heating and air conditioning contractors. We are professionally and continually trained in the skills of service, repair and system replacement.

I am serious about my profession; proud of my entire staff; and completely dedicated to each and every one of my clients ... new and old.

Now, how am I going to prove all this to you if I can’t get your attention? Right! I make you a spectacular offer you can’t refuse and win you as a new client for life.

Back to my offer.

My Super-Tune-Up includes a painstaking and thorough examination of more than 50 potential problem areas in your air conditioner. I will inspect, adjust, and clean your air conditioner and when I

“WORRY FREE GUARANTEE”™ — John Haynie, PE Owner Since 1926

©CSRAAIR GA LICENSE CU 400179

”

have finished if anything needs a repair I will present you with “WORRY FREE PRICING”™ and a written WORRY FREE GUARANTEE”™! And if I have to come back during this season because your system is not working, my service is FREE! This is a $189 value for only $79 and it’s limited to first-come, first-served callers. Don’t miss this opportunity to meet the Best in the Business.

706-722-5304

S I X M O N T H S S A M E A S C A S H F I N A N C I N G AVA I L A B L E F O R A P R I L

We salute our employees during National Hospital Week, May 9-16.

I’ve worked in the Burn Center for over 15 years.

There’s a reason for that!

Jane Echols, RN Ask us what makes Doctors Hospital a great place to work.

We’ll tell you it’s the people we work with—staff and patients—they’re like family. It’s the support we find around us—recognition when we achieve, encouragement to grow.

We’ll mention our size—big enough to offer career opportunities, not so large we lose sight of each other. And flexibility— working together as one, respecting personal needs.

Ask us! We’re the people of Doctors Hospital—we’re all individuals; we make a great team!

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

706.651.3232 w w w. d o c t o r s - h o s p i t a l . n e t

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Give her flowers that last...

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

ELEMENT IS BIG ON FUNCTION.

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Where High End Doesn’t Mean High Prices.

3309 Washington Rd • Between Fury’s Ferry & Pleasant Home • 860-3434

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Whatever you’re into, the Element will get you there and back, and be your base camp in between.

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GERALD JONES HONDA

4022 Washington Road • Martinez, GA • 1-800-203-9371 • www.geraldjoneshonda.com

Contents

METRO SPIRIT ON THE COVER 19

Movies by Mail: Netflix

14

Artists or Vandals?

By Stacey Eidson

MAY 6-12 • FREE WEEKLY • METROSPIRIT.COM

Photos courtesy of Netflix

By Brian Neill

Photo: Brian Neill Cover Design: Natalie Holle

OPINION 6 Whine Line 6 This Modern World 6 Words 8 Thumbs Up/Down 10 Insider

CINEMA 36 Flix 38 “Mean Girls” Examines Realities of Adolescence 40 “Van Helsing,” Another Poorly Conceived Vampire Film 40 Reel Time

METRO BEAT 13 Augusta’s Budget Bust

MUSIC 41 Margolin Brings Chicago Blues to Thomson 42 Garden City Music Festival This Weekend 43 CD Reviews 44 Music by Turner 45 Sightings 46 Music Minis 47 After Dark

BITE 24 Sample Authentic Mexican at San Jose 25 In the Mix ARTS 26 Augusta Opera Presents “Rigoletto” — With Surtitles EVENTS 29 Calendar

STUFF 50 News of the Weird 51 Brezsny’s Free Will Astrology 51 New York Times Crossword Puzzle 52 Amy Alkon: Advice Goddess 53 Datemaker 55 Classifieds

EDITOR & PUBLISHER David Vantrease ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Rhonda Jones STAFF WRITERS Stacey Eidson, Brian Neill ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Joe White

PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Smith

ADVERTISING SALES SUPPORT Riali Blackstock, Michelle Dove

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT INTERN Andy Stokes

GRAPHIC ARTISTS Ange Hagler, Natalie Holle, Shawn Sutherland ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Lisa Jordan

40

14

19

ACCOUNTING MANANGER/CLASSIFIEDS Sharon King SENIOR MUSIC CONTRIBUTOR Ed Turner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Amy Alkon, Rob Brezsny, Rachel Deahl, David Elliott, Amy Fennell Christian CARTOONISTS Tom Tomorrow

Metro Spirit is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks of the year. Editorial coverage includes arts, local issues, news, entertainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum.

The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers. Visit us at www.metrospirit.com. Copyright © Metro Spirit, Inc. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited. Phone: (706) 738-1142 Fax: (706) 733-6663 E-mail: spirit@metrospirit.com Letters to the Editor: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, Ga. 30914-3809

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Augusta Location: 209 Bobby Jones Expressway Martinez, GA 30907 Store Hours: Mon-Sat 10AM - 5:30PM - Financing, layaway plans available Phone: 706-228-5544 Toll-Free: 1-800-259-7880 www.greatoutdoorsga.com

Trampolines With ENCLOSURES

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

How about that SUV with all the Bells and Whistles, and… yes, that big screen TV too. So, why not get the biggest, the best, and the safest swing set for your kids.

$999 +tax & install

OPINION

Whine Line

T

he Border Beer Bust looked like a blast, but unfortunately I had to watch from the perimeter. Like many others, I brought my dog with me to enjoy the beautiful day. My dog, who is very sweet and wellbehaved, was not allowed to enter.

Apparently a very aggressive pit bull attacked another dog, sending it to the emergency vet clinic the previous evening. Please do not ruin it for everyone. If your dog has aggressive tendencies, do not take it to events where other animals and small children are present.

The Whine Line has exposed a new breed of hypersensitive Augustan. The ugly, convertible-driving, disc-golf-playing waiter who enjoys taking his dog to First Friday.

So now the state wants to ration water and levy fines to enforce it But only to non-commercial users.

Translation? The peasants. The malls will still be allowed to water their asphalt 24/7, as will golf courses and city hall, of course.

What if we stop referring to John Kerry as the apparent or presumptive nominee and call it like it is: The most current or most recent nominee or the nominee for now.

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

A big whine to the county commission!

Way to go. You have successfully driven out another decent county administrator. Mr. Kolb has done a good job in what I’m sure is one of the most aggravating venues in the country. I met Mr. Kolb’s wife when they first moved here, and I said to tell her husband good luck because he would be working with one of the biggest pack of jackasses in the world, and it looks like

I was telling the truth. Just because Mr. Kolb wouldn’t bend over and kiss y’all’s inflated egos, some commissioners have done everything they can to tear down a good man. So wake up Richmond County: It’s time to get rid of the real problem, i.e., the Richmond County Commission.

I live out here in Waynesboro and I do not have access to either one of our local cable systems, and I just want to say leave Rob and Ike alone! God! I would then like to thank them (and the producers of Mad TV) for saving Saturday nights. Just wish the show was an hour long. What do you say, Fox? To the 36-year-old male who was complaining about the slam on Bush on radio station 95 — get off your butt and turn the station off. There are plenty of right-wing, corporate-run, Bush-loving stations for you to listen to. I wonder if you were this concerned about the stabs aimed at President Clinton? I doubt if you were that consistent. Remember, President Clinton lied and nobody died. Bush lied and thousands die.

You know you live in a redneck state (i.e., Georgia) if law enforcement officers are allowed to drive without seatbelts or if a person is allowed to ride a motorcycle without wearing a helmet (i.e., South Carolina).

The beer festival was generally carefree with the mix of the public and dogs. I brought my lab to attend. There was a toddler whose parents asked if the child could pet my dog, which she did. Everyone was pleased. Within five minutes afterward, my dog was attacked by a pit bull which came out of nowhere. Luckily, this attack wasn’t

Words “We have no assurances that this will not be a dangerous place for people to come to express their opinions. That’s a condemnation of our country. If we’re in such a police state that people are afraid to come and make their views known because they’re gonna be clubbed in the head and shot with rubber bullets and pepper spray, then in my opinion, the terrorists have already won.”

— Robert Randall, a protest organizer for the upcoming G-8 Summit in Sea Island, near Savannah, as quoted by Atlanta’s Creative Loafing. The summit, scheduled for early June, will be attended by President George W. Bush and leaders of the world’s eight wealthiest nations. A recent Associated Press story detailed how police were gathering intelligence on peaceful dissenters and had even advised property owners not to lease their land and venues to protest groups. Ironically, the Creative Loafing article stated, the CEO of Sea Island Co., which is hosting the G-8 Summit, offered to open up nine acres of the company’s land so people could protest.

fatal, yet did require a hefty vet bill and injury to myself as well. The witnesses agreed that such a breed of animal had no place in public. Let’s be clear that the broad banning of all dogs to public events isn’t fair to non-hostile dogs, but it should apply to known fighting dogs. What if the toddler had approached the pit bull? On the flip side, a friend owns a lovable English pit bull, which hasn’t been bred nor trained to kill. Both our dogs get along and he adores children. In states such as California and Florida, home owners having known hostile dogs are required to have additional insurance

just in case of possible/probable attacks. I intend to legally pursue this matter against this attack dog’s owner so perhaps he will think twice before entering a public space with such a potentially lethal threat. We the voters can resolve this issue to be selective among dog breeds.

Congratulations to J.B. Powell and his lovely family for making the ultimate sacrifice and returning to the public arena. There are few true public servants who can get the job done but, fortunately, J.B. is one of them. We are proud to call him a friend and our only continued on page 8

Attention state HEALTH BENEFIT PLAN employees:

CHOOSE UNIVERSITY. ! 1st Medical Network PPO ! United Healthcare HMO ! Cigna HMO BlueChoice HMO choose a health plan that gives you access to Augusta’S MOST PREFERRED health care provider* – University Hospital.

STATE HEALTH BENEFIT PLAN EMPLOYEES: It’s open enrollment time. Make sure you’re a member of one of the health plans above so you and your family can benefit from the strength of University Hospital: • More than 450 affiliated, independent private physicians • Nearly 6,000 catheterizations and 700 open-heart procedures performed each year – more than all other area hospitals combined • Exclusive partnership with M. D. Anderson Physicians Network® – affiliated with the nation's top rated cancer center according to U.S. News & World Report.

• Over 3,000 babies delivered last year in state-of-the-art birthing rooms • Area’s only Level 3 Neonatal Intensive Care Unit within a comprehensive women’s center • Nearly 70,000 Emergency Department visits last year

For more information or to request your FREE Guide To Selecting a Health Plan, call 706/774-7744.

Choose the 1st Medical Network PPO, United or Cigna option to make sure you have access to University. www.universityhealth.org *National Research Corporation, Consumer Choice Award, 1999-2003

THERE’S STRENGTH IN OUR NUMBERS.

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004 7

continued from page 6 regret is we no longer live in the area and cannot give him our full support.

Go gettum, J.B.!

I work for a local retailer. We have offered discounts to local law enforcement officers. This is not a companywide practice. We do it to show our appreciation to these hard-working men and women. Please tell your spouses to quit whining about the discounts. It sounds very ungrateful and we can only do so much. I overheard a 15-minute argument with one of my cashiers from a spouse of an officer complaining about the amount of the discount. It made a scene and slowed down my lines. If it continues, I will cancel the discount and be done with it.

I sure hope those photos depicting our soldiers abusing Iraqi prisoners are fake, because if they’re real, world opinion of the U.S. goes from hero to zero!

This is a whine for the Columbia County school system! They have started taking up schoolbooks as of April, when we still have four weeks of school left. Not only that, but in one class they are starting to learn about the bones, nervous system and the

Thumbs Up

digestive system. The philosophy is get it in class! No schoolbook is allowed to go home.

Saturday, April 24th, I saw one of the worst examples of commercialism I’ve seen in my 63 years. On the front page of The Chronicle, above the fold, over a picture of a tribute to Pat Tillman was pasted an ad for a used car lot. It’s disgusting and The Chronicle and the car lot should be ashamed.

Kolb does not have a chance. The commission could not work with God, especially Marion Williams.

This is to the whiner who wants to know how Danny Craig can support the death penalty and still go to church.

Why don’t you go ask Curious George, your resident in the Whine House? He seemed to have no trouble doing it while he was governor of Texas. In fact, more executions were carried out (152 to be exact) during Georgie’s stay in the governor’s mansion than at any other time in the history of Texas. All he had to do was make one phone call, but, no, being the “compassionate” person that he is, he just couldn’t find it in his heart to do it. In fact, he mimicked a woman who was pleading for her life on national TV. You people are such hypocrites, you make me sick.

To Cot Campbell and Aiken’s Dogwood Stable for a fourth-place finish at the Kentucky Derby. Though Campbell obviously hoped his “Limehouse” would

wind up in the top three, it’s still an accomplishment that’s nothing to sneeze at. We know Campbell will one day bring home the trophy.

Thumbs Down More needs to be done to promote the Downtown Lunch Date concert series held each Wednesday through June at the Augusta Common. Last Wednesday, a beautiful, sunny day,

This is for the guy who wants honesty and doesn’t like being dropped like an old shoe. Well, don’t show up at my apartment the next night unannounced or without being invited, and don’t ask me about my previous sex life on our first date. Thank you.

jazz singer Kari Gaffney entertained onstage. Trouble was, her audience consisted of only seven people.

Augustans need to get out and support the event.

seven years. I’ve never seen him pressure anybody to do anything for a campaign. Everything is volunteer. If this deputy was pressured by a supervisor, it must be a one-time incident by an overzealous supervisor, because I haven’t seen any others doing it.

Call our Whine Line at 510-2051 and leave your comments. We won’t use your name. Fax your whines by dialing (706) 733-6663 or e-mail your whines to whine@metrospirit.com.

I saw the whine from the deputy sheriff from Columbia County who was pressured to buy barbecue tickets. I’ve worked for the sheriff up there for

Luminaries For Sale... To Remember the Battle We want to honor the area cancer survivors at this year’s American Cancer Society Relay For Life

Monday • 7:30 Channel

M AY 1 4 T H & 1 5 T H

MEET

U.S. PARALYMPICS SWIMMER

at the Family Y

Lance Lamback and Coach David McDevott

Luminaries may be purchased for a minimum of $5.00 per luminary.

AlienS AT THE

A luminary bag with your loved one’s name written on it will line the track at the Relay. It will shine all night to help us remember to keep up the fight.

NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER'S FT. DISCOVERY A Championship Story of Baseball & Community and other upcoming events at The Lucy C. Laney Museum of Art

The luminary ceremony is one of the most special parts of the American Cancer Society Relay For Life.

Honor a loved one who is a cancer survivor or remember someone you’ve lost in this meaningful way.

To sign up for the survivors walk, call

8

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

Plus a Candlelight Jazz SERIES

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE!

Call in your questions & comments to 739-1822 or e-mail at connectlive@comcast.net Replays: Daily at 12 Noon, 3pm, and 10:30pm on

Channel 66

Presenting:

Augusta Oncology Associates Medical Oncology Associates MCG Owens & Minor University Hospital

706-731-9900 Sponsors of the 2004 Relay For Life Are:

Platinum: John Deere Terry Wicks Events & More Doctor’s Hospital Sam’s Club Metro Spirit

Gold: Atlanta Gas & Light Monsanto Greater Augusta Assoc. of Realtors Silver: Kennametal IPG Very Vera Club Car

The Finest Southern Style Food in the City • Southern Classics • Fresh Vegetables Daily • Country Breads made Fresh Daily • Homemade Desserts • Ribs & Chicken (Saturdays) • Catering

A WELLNESS RETREAT FOR WOMEN

NOW OPEN! A TASTE OF WHAT YOU’LL FIND... ! ! ! ! ! !

10,000 square foot facility Cardio\ Weights\ Classes Weight Management Center Holistic Spa Eve's Café Aquatics Center (Coming Soon)

And don't forget Mom on May 9th DELIVERED GIFT BASKETS $99 includes certificate for 1 hour spa service, 1 day use of wellness center, and various organic products in a beautiful gift basket with card.

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30 minutes (mom\daughter) receive each of following: 30 minute massage, facial, pedicure, healthy drinks, snacks, use of wellness center (cardio, classes, weights, sauna). (Total $149)

MOTHER\DAUGHTER PACKAGE #2 - All of above for 1 hour, plus healthy lunches, nutritional analysis, skin care analysis. (Total $249)

Powerful. Nimble. Reserved.

NOW OPEN IN MARTINEZ

XM Radio now available on select models

GERALD JONES HONDA 4022 Washington Road Martinez, GA 1-800-203-9371 www.geraldjoneshonda.com

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

Introducing the redesigned HONDA ACCORD available at

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OPINION

Insider

Who Will Ministers Support?

LEGAL NOTICE 2004 HOMESTEAD EXEMPTION INFORMATION (1) NEW homeowners must apply for Homestead Exemption at the Tax Commissioner’s Office January 2 through June 1, 2004.Homeowners now receiving Homestead Exemptions need not apply unless they have purchased a new home during the year, or are eligible for a greater exemption, in which case a new application must be filed. Exemptions are automatically renewed each year.

(2) Homeowners over 65, who are not currently receiving the Double Homestead Exemption, may apply for the Richmond County School Tax Exemption, regardless of income.

(3) for information concerning Homestead Exemptions, call 821-2391 or write for printed information to The Tax Commissioner’s Office, Room 117, Municipal Building, Augusta, GA 30911.

If you have already filed for a Homestead Exemption for 2004 you need not file again.

Thank you… JERRY SAUL Tax Commissioner Augusta-Richmond County. Georgia

I

n 2002, two African-American ministers took a bold and risky step by publicly supporting Randy Hall against then state Sen. Charles Walker in the District 22 state senate election. The resulting narrow defeat of Walker by now state Sen. Hall shocked the community, made heros of the two ministers in the white community and caused more than a little consternation among some African-Americans, who questioned why the ministers supported a white candidate over a black one.

Rev. Kenneth Martin, pastor of Antioch Baptist Church, and Rev. Clarence Moore, pastor of Good Shepherd Baptist Church, made the difference in that election.

Without their staunch support, Hall would not have won. Now, after redistricting, Hall finds himself in District 23 and the ministers find themselves in a completely different position. Who will they support?

Reliable sources report that the ministers have not decided to what extent they will be involved this time around. The Democratic primary in July will feature Walker against local attorney Ed Tarver. The winner will face state Sen. Don Cheeks in November.

Rev. Martin has been to some public meetings with Tarver, but he has made no public pronouncement of whether he will endorse any candidate. Rev. Moore remains “open” to the candidates, according to reliable sources close to him. Insiders suggest that neither minister will be as out front in this election as they were in 2002.

Well-placed sources report that the ministers have met with two of the three candidates in the race, but if they have decided to

support one of the three, they are keeping quiet about it at the moment.

Many political prognosticators suggest that Walker will win the primary handily and go on to beat Cheeks in the general election, unless Walker is indicted on charges stemming from federal and state investigations of his business and political activities.

He Said, He Said The split between District Attorney Danny Craig and the Democratic Party has turned into a “he said, he said” contest for Craig and Richmond County Democratic Party Chairman Lowell Greenbaum. Craig qualified to run as a Republican this year after running as a Democrat for years. Craig says he did not suggest to Greenbaum that he would run as a Democrat this year, while Greenbaum swears Craig said just that in a personal meeting between the two. Is someone distorting the truth or is it just a case of bad communication?

Meanwhile, insiders report that Craig has told more than one politically connected person that he supports Democrat J.B. Powell against Republican state Sen. Randy Hall in the District 23 state senate race. Does he really, or is that just more miscommunication? No doubt Craig’s newfound Republican friends would like some clarification on the subject.

The views expressed in this column are the views of The Insider and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

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Local Contractor Goes Crazy… And Gives Away $42,000 (Mild spring creates golden opportunity for Homeowners…)

Forty-two local homeowners are able to buy a new Premier or Deluxe central air conditioner and heating system with no money down and get a check for $1000.* And it gets better.

If your air conditioner is over 10 years old you might be able to get a new air conditioner and furnace without taking a dime out of your pocket. More about this in a moment.

Right now you might be asking yourself, “What’s the catch? Otherwise, how can he make an offer like this?”

There is no catch. But there is a special circumstance I’ll explain… You see, several times a year I buy air conditioners “in bulk” instead of the “onesy, twosy” most other contractors do. And why do I do this? It’s simple. I do it to give myself extra leverage when I go in to “jawbone” the manufacturer into giving me lower prices.

Just Think If your air conditioner is over 10 years old, the money you save on your electric bill could offset the monthly investment on your new system. It’s almost like “having your cake, and eating it too.”

No Obligation Even after he explains the installation of the over stocked air conditioners, there is No Obligation on your part. If you decide you don’t want to take advantage, that’s ok. I want you to have a surprise gift because you are kind enough to give me the opportunity to solve my “bulk buy” problem. I want you to think well of Duggan Heating &Air Conditioning even if you don’t buy.

Call now at, 706-733-8703, and thank you for reading this rather long ad. I hope you will profit greatly because of it.

1-706-733-8703

11

© 2002 AirTime500 Inc., *With approved Credit (WAC). * Certain Restrictions Apply

Here’s How Just call Kathy at 706-733-8703 and she will set up an appointment for your Free survey. My Comfort Advisor will come and measure your home to determine the proper size and explain this Special Get rid Of My Extra Air Conditioner Program.

Don’t forget, I only have 42 heating & air systems. When they’re gone this $1,000 off also ends.

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

My Problem Is Your Opportunity Because of the mild spring weather, I have 42 overstocked Premier and Deluxe air conditioners that I must move out of inventory. And here is my problem. Most people only replace their old, inefficient air conditioner after it breaks down! But, due to the mild weather people are not running their air conditioners so none are breaking down. So I had to create a program so financially advantageous… that homeowners with old air conditioners would come out ahead by replacing both the heating and air system before they broke down!

Another thing. These 42 systems are brand new models. They are not seconds, blems or standard “builder” models. And have a full 10 year parts and 10- year labor warranty.

Iron-Clad Guarantee I’m so confident that you will save 20% on your electric bill (I’m projecting more like 30% to 50%) that I will pay you Double The Difference if you don’t the first year.

It’s a Exclusive!

We’re sailing into fashion history with "Lillywood", Lilly Pulitzer’s first pattern made exclusively for Signature Stores!

Come in and see our other Lilly Pulitzer® fashions for Spring

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

and Summer, too!

Surrey Center • Lower Level 434-0067 • shopviamizner.com

METRO BEAT

Finance

Augusta’s Budget Bust

W

“I can tell you right now, we aren’t going to make it,” Kolb said. “We can’t do it. About $200,000 was all we collected the first quarter. We needed $1 million.

“We are now in the second quarter and not only do we have to make up that million, but we’ve got to make another $800,000 on top of that to get back on track. We just can’t do it.”

In order to lessen the financial blow to city departments that may run out of money by the end of the year, Persaud and Kolb advised the commission to begin looking immediately

million, but we are going to be dealing with $7 million that is going to reveal itself in 2005.”

Augusta Commissioner Don Grantham said he felt it was time for the city to ask department heads to seriously consider cuts in their budgets, including possibly staffing levels.

“We just can’t keep raising taxes in order to satisfy an increase in expenses based on salaries and services provided to the people of this county,” Grantham said. “I think it’s time to put a directive to the department heads and let them know what our situation is like. If we

Don Grantham

“I think it’s time to put a directive to the department heads and let them know what our situation is like. If we don’t, we’re just fooling ourselves.”

—— Augusta Commissioner Don Grantham

at ways to handle the shortfall.

“You have got three options,” Kolb told the commission. “You can raise revenue, cut expenses or, for a short-term, and I would not recommend this for a long-term, but you could go into your reserve fund balance.”

Persaud said using the city’s financial reserves should be the commission’s last resort because this deficit is not going to go away.

“It would be disastrous,” Persaud said. “This year we are looking at $3.8

don’t, we’re just fooling ourselves.”

Kolb wanted the commission to understand that, while he supports looking at city departments for potential cuts, there are other areas in the government, such as the recreation department, that are going to have new facilities opening soon.

“If you start cutting in one area, you may end up spending it in another area,” Kolb said. “You need to be conscientious of that. The expansion of Diamond Lakes is coming online and we are looking for some other

facilities to come online.

“So, it doesn’t make a lot of sense cutting one area and having to take those savings to another area. Instead, you may want to stop a project.”

Augusta Commissioner Bobby Hankerson said that more people would probably support putting off opening a new facility instead of having to close an existing one.

However, he also thought that some departments desperately needed to look more closely at the productivity of their employees.

“There are some things that I have observed when I’ve been out in the field that I think we need to look at,” Hankerson said. “I see productivity is going down the drain.”

Hankerson said he’s observed a number of employees lounging around when they should be working.

“They need to be mindful of when they take off for breakfast and coffee breaks and what time they’re buying lottery tickets,” Hankerson said. “All that says to me, we have a little bit too many employees.

“So, the department heads need to send a signal to the employees that they need to be productive, because we’ve got commissioners out there in the field that are noticing this stuff, who are going to be doing some cutting and there may be some loss of jobs.”

Persaud also had some discouraging news about the city’s plan to implement its salary reclassification program this July. The plan is expected to increase a number of employees’ salaries at a cost of approximately $1 million annually.

“At this point and time, we are facing reducing the budget by $3.8 million,” Persaud said. “So, coming from a logical point of view, I don’t see any funding in place for reclassification.”

If that’s the case, Hankerson said it was time for the commission to be completely honest with its employees, many whom have been waiting for significant raises since 2000.

“We have delayed this a couple of times now,” Hankerson said. “By the time we give them this increase, those figures will be so old we will need another reclassification.”

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

hen the Augusta Commission was told last October that there would be a shortfall in the 2003 tax digest, resulting in a net loss of approximately $1.5 million in anticipated revenue, it was as if the city was facing a battle with Goliath.

This year, Goliath is equipped with a machine gun.

“It appears we will still be looking at a $3.8 million shortfall in the general fund this year,” Finance Director David Persaud told commissioners on April 29, as several of them groaned.

However, unlike last year, the anticipated $3.8 million deficit is not a result of a surprise shortfall in the 2004 tax digest.

In fact, the city’s budget could have been in a much bigger hole if both Persaud and Chief Tax Assessor Sonny Reece had not advised the commission against City Administrator George Kolb’s recommendation last year to budget for a slight increase in the tax digest.

Instead, Persaud and Reece convinced commissioners that they would be wiser to play it safe and budget for “no growth” in the tax digest.

And according to the city’s first quarter financial report, it appears Persaud and Reece were correct.

“The reason I did not give you the digest figures (last week) so that y’all could be analyzing it, I was afraid some of you may have a heart attack,” Reece jokingly said. “Y’all were very frugal when you adopted the budget with zero growth and I think that’s where we are right now – no growth.”

Rather than resulting from problems with the tax digest, the estimated $3.8 million budgetary shortfall is expected to occur because the city has not been able to maintain enough savings from its manpower management plan.

In order for this plan to work, the only new employees that city departments were authorized to hire were those needed to fill crucial positions.

By enforcing this plan, the city was expected to achieve a $1 million savings during its first quarter. At the end of the year, the manpower management plan was to save the city almost $4 million.

By Stacey Eidson

13

Photo by Brian Neill

Graffiti Duo’s Work Amuses — And Annoys

By Brian Neill

Winged robot just below the rooftop of a building in the 1100 block of Broad Street.

delivers pizza, but hopes to soon head to art school in New York. “My mom tells me, when she’s driving around and sees one of my robots, it brightens her day. It makes her happy.”

GUS, a 21-year-old graphic arts student who looks the clean-cut skater type, said it’s gratifying when the occasional person discovers his and MSG’s identities and comments favorably on their graffiti.

“I guess there’s a small underground following now,” GUS said.

“There’s people, they find out who we are,

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004 14

The surroundings looked like an art class on drugs.

Sheets of bizarre collages made from “Gray’s Anatomy” illustrations were scattered across the floor. Paints and clippings of old magazines were strewn everywhere.

Puffing on a cigarette and gulping water from a Brita pitcher, MSG, a 22-year-old with a blue stud in his bottom lip and a head of curly, black hair barely kept at bay by his ball cap, spoke passionately about his art.

“Really, the only reason I do it is to brighten people’s day,” said MSG, who now

Photo by Shawn Sutherland

M

aybe you’ve turned a corner downtown and caught a glimpse of a strange, but humorous, robot, or a winged being with a Cheshire cat grin wringing its hands.

Or maybe you remember the caricature of the nerdy couple gazing lovingly at each other, a big red heart floating above them, that was pasted to the side of the former Cobern Furniture building at 11th and Broad streets.

And maybe you’ve wondered, who is behind all this zany stuff, anyway?

Well, you’re about to find out — sort of.

These off-kilter creations, these burps of levity from the abyss of the daily grind, come from two twenty-something graffiti artists who go by the tags GUS and MSG. They’ve asked that their real names be withheld, however, because their art has sort of gotten them into trouble lately.

On a recent afternoon, the two led me into an old warehouse off Ellis Street and up a set of stairs lit only by a rectangular bank of white, pinpoint lights.

After some cautious footsteps in the dark, we arrived at GUS and MSG’s studio on the second story.

Photo by Shawn Sutherland

and they’re like, ‘Oh, every single day I walk down the street to see if you guys have put anything else up,’” MSG added.

Both say their inspiration derives from images conjured from childhood.

GUS said he draws a lot of his ideas from 1950s-era cartoons.

“Like all the old, original Looney Toons and Disney characters,” GUS said. “I like those a lot.”

GUS and MSG’s work also resembles that of Stanley Donwood, who does much of the CD cover and promotional art for the group Radiohead, though they don’t consider him an influence.

Their brushes, as it would be, are Sharpie or Sir-Marks-A-Lot pens. Their palette: Discarded newsprint they say is given to them for free by a local newspaper.

GUS and MSG say they work quickly and in advance, drawing up their caricatures in the studio and then pasting them up, covert-style, with wallpaper adhesive.

Each “installation” as they call it takes about five to seven minutes to put up, they said.

But in February, GUS and MSG lingered too long at their work. They say Richmond County sheriff’s deputies caught them across from the Continuum nightclub on Ellis Street, in the process of erecting their graffiti.

GUS said he paid the $300 fine. But MSG said he decided to go to court.

As a result, MSG said, he got one year of probation and 40 hours of community service in addition to the $300 fine.

“I really hate going to see my probation officer, because I’m doing it for my art,” MSG said. “You know? I have to go see my probation officer for doing my art.”

One person who’s taken an interest in GUS and MSG is Coco Rubio, co-owner of the Soul Bar. Rubio has invited them to add paste-ups in his bar and currently has a showing of their artwork on display there.

“I kept noticing all these different paste-ups downtown. And I just noticed them more and more and I really liked the way they looked,” Rubio said. “One, just for the design, and two, a lot of the content I thought was not only funny, but also art on several levels.”

Rubio said he’s been intrigued by graffiti as an art form for some time now.

“I thought it would be an interesting art exhibit to put it on the wall of the Soul Bar,” Rubio said. “The whole graffiti culture is interesting to me to start off with. I’ve always thought what graffiti artists have done in places like New York was always interesting.

Years ago, they even brought it into the galleries and kind of made it a legitimate art form, which I believe it is.”

But Rubio realizes the community as a whole may not appreciate GUS and MSG’s street work.

“I just thought, instead of giving them a hard time, I’m going to support their art and let them know that I think what they’re doing is cool,” Rubio said. “But at the same time, I know they’re going to have to deal with the realities of what they do, also, as far as doing it in public.”

Long associated with anarchistic expression, not to mention gang activity, graffiti is now heralded in some circles as a modernday art form.

But law enforcement and property owners often are not sold on that idea.

An April article in The New York Times featured a chalk and acrylic graffiti artist who was scheduled to appear in court for his work.

Owing to a previous graffiti bust, prosecutors were accepting nothing less than 30 days in jail for a guilty plea from the artist, 32year-old James De La Vega, even though many residents supported him and didn’t mind his murals on their buildings and property, The Times reported.

Lynwood Smith, for one, doesn’t call GUS and MSG’s work art. He calls it vandalism.

Smith owns a now-vacant car lot and former continued on page 16

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

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continued from page 14

Photo by Brian Neill

gas station at the intersection of 12th and Ellis streets.

The front of the building is covered with some of GUS and MSG’s work — a wildeyed, grimacing figure reading a newspaper and an arm with gun in hand extending to the bust of a stubbly haired man with missing teeth.

“I don’t want anymore of this kind of crap.

It’s certainly devaluing it,” Smith said. “I don’t want the gun at all. It may be considered art, but I don’t like the gun.

“Anytime someone defaces your property it’s vandalism. Even if they put something on there that’s not offensive. And it’s something that can’t just be taken off of there. It’s going to have to be scraped and painted, I imagine.”

Actually, just a little bit of wallpaper stripper will do the trick, GUS said, adding that he’d take it down himself if Smith was that mad about it.

GUS and MSG concede that their art may offend some people or madden property owners. They say that they typically avoid small businesses and mom-and-pop-type establishments. Windows, too, are off limits, GUS said.

“My favorite things to stick stuff on is like those metal (utility) boxes out on Broad Street in the median,” MSG said. “I don’t know why, but they clean it up like within a week of the time I do it, so I’ve pretty much given up on those. They’re so ugly. You know these big, metal operating things, standing in

Photo by Brian Neill

continued on page 18

MSG (left) and GUS pose anonymously inside their warehouse studio.

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Lynwood Smith’s property, covered with the work of GUS and MSG. the middle of the street doing nothing but changing the traffic lights.

“I think they could stand some decoration.”

Even when told of Smith’s feelings, GUS and MSG still don’t accept being labeled as vandals.

“I mean, yeah, pretty much anything like that can be considered vandalism,” MSG said. “I really don’t like to call it vandalism. It’s really more art than vandalism.”

“I really don’t like to call it vandalism either,” GUS added. “I think vandalism is more like going around breaking windows.”

Since their recent encounter with law enforcement, however, GUS and MSG have been laying low, concentrating on their drawings and trying to get their art shown in less risky settings.

“We haven’t really gone out since we got busted, actually,” GUS said. “We’ve just pretty much kept it to drawing, really.”

Something about MSG’s grin, however, suggests that people shouldn’t completely rule out seeing their work turn up on the occasional abandoned building or utility box in the future.

“We might get the urge again sometime,” MSG said. “You never know.”

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Movies by Mail: The Growing Popularity of

Netflix

By Stacey Eidson

T

back into the prepaid mailer provided by Netflix and drop it in the mail.

“It’s just the most convenient way to rent a movie,” said Shannon Clouston, senior manager of Netflix’s corporate public relations division in Los Gatos, Calif.

“You don’t have to worry about stamps or anything like that. The DVDs come in a prepaid envelope, so basically all you have to do is mail the movies back to us and as soon as we get one movie back, we send out the next one on your list.

“That way, you get a constant flow of movies. And the majority of the country receives a one-day turn around, so if you put it in the mail Monday, you’ll get your next movie by Wednesday.”

Just as long as a subscriber keeps his or her online movie list, referred to as the “Q,” updated, the movies keep coming.

“You’re constantly getting new movies throughout the month with whatever frequency you decide to watch them,” Clouston said. “Take as long as you want to watch a movie or turn it around right away. It’s all up to you.”

Discovering Netflix has made watching movies at home much more relaxing and enjoyable for Cockerille and his wife.

“With Netflix, I just get online, I go right to their Web site and, if I know what I want I can go to categories, look at everything that they’ve got and make a selection,” Cockerille said. “And their selections are much wider than these little local movie stores.”

Cockerille used to make the 30-minute drive to Augusta from his Aiken home in hopes of finding a better selection of movies.

“My wife is from India and likes watching Hindi movies,” Cockerille said.

“And we would have to go to Augusta, to some of the Indian food stores to be able to find Hindi movies because they carry videos like that in those stores.”

But when Cockerille and his wife took the videos home to watch, they were rarely pleased with what they saw.

“They were always very poor quality copied videos, and the selection was not good either,” Cockerille said. “But now, with Netflix, it’s just incredible. They have the latest in Hindi movies and international movies. They have got everything.

Whether you like off-the-wall type movies, horror movies, old movies, new movies, whatever. The selection is incredible. continued on page 20

19

the growing market of Americans who love movies, but hate video stores.

Since 1998, Netflix has become the world’s largest online movie rental service, providing more than 1.9 million subscribers throughout the country the ability to visit netflix.com, rent their choice of movies and get them sent directly to their homes.

With Netflix’s most popular rental plan of $19.95 per month, customers can rent as many movies as they want each month, but are limited to having up to three DVDs out at one time.

The plan begins when customers enroll in the program and create their personalized movie list online. Then, usually within one business day, they receive from their movie lists three DVDs wrapped in Netflix’s signature red envelopes.

Subscribers can choose from a selection of more than 18,000 movie titles spanning 250 genres and subgenres including romance, thrillers, sci-fi, foreign films and classics.

Netflix customers can keep the movies as long as they wish. Once they are finished watching a movie, all subscribers have to do is put the DVD

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

he last thing Ron Cockerille wants to do after work is drive to the local video rental store and spend at least 20 minutes searching the shelves for an entertaining movie.

“With my job, I really don’t have time to go to places like Blockbuster or Movie Gallery,” said Cockerille, a photojournalist living in Aiken. “And I got tired of dealing with those types of stores because when you rent a movie, there’s a time limit. And if you don’t take it back, you’ve got a late fee. It’s just an inconvenience.”

Apparently, Cockerille is not alone in his frustrations.

Each day, thousands of U.S. Postal workers are delivering small, red envelopes to mailboxes across the country.

Within these envelopes are millions of movie lovers’ tickets to freedom.

Freedom from futile trips to video stores that offer a limited selection.

Freedom from long lines of grouchy customers with whining kids.

And, perhaps most importantly, freedom from late fees.

Netflix, a California-based online DVD rental company, is currently dominating

continued from page 19 “I mean, I use Netflix all the time now.

It’s a weekly thing for me. So, I always tell people about it because I think it’s a really good deal.”

Such endorsements from regular customers have become the secret to Netflix’s success, Clouston said.

“To date, the increase in our popularity is due to pretty heavy word of mouth,” Clouston said. “I think once we have somebody who is excited and engaged in the service, they will tell their friend, tell their parents, tell their relatives, basically, tell everyone about us.”

Netflix’s steady growth has caught the attention of many of the industry’s giants like Blockbuster and Wal-Mart, as well as investors on Wall Street.

In May 2002, Netflix raised $80 million in one of the most successful initial public offerings of the year. On Netflix’s first day of trading, shares in the company rose nearly 12 percent to $15 a share. By the end of 2003, Netflix had collected $272 million in revenue and the stock’s performance was up 150 percent.

By January, Netflix’s stock price had risen to nearly $40 a share.

Since Netflix was first launched in 1998, the company has also constructed 26 distribution centers across the country, including one in Atlanta, to ensure that 80 percent of the company’s subscribers receive next-day delivery.

This past quarter, Netflix announced it had acquired an additional 760,000 subscribers, which is an 82-percent

increase compared with the company’s first quarter figures in 2003.

Netflix can now boast a total of 1,932,000 current subscribers.

But despite all of the company’s accolades,

approximately 48 million members and more than 8,700 stores world-wide, according to Bloomberg News. Movie Gallery is the second-largest video chain with 2,076 stores.

“I think most people just don’t like going to the local video store at all.”

— Shannon Clouston, senior manager of Netflix’s corporate public relations

it is estimated that Netflix has only secured 1.7 percent of the video rental market.

Blockbuster is still king of that mountain.

Currently, Blockbuster, which was founded in Dallas, Texas, in 1985, has

While Blockbuster’s numbers may sound impressive, the company’s sales have struggled due to the fact it has been slow to expand its video rental business.

In April, Blockbuster’s first-quarter

report stated that the company’s net income slipped approximately 6 percent.

Viacom, which acquired Blockbuster in 1994, recently announced plans to split off its majority stake in the movie rental company to shareholders.

Blockbuster is also feeling the pinch of Netflix’s success and is beginning to fight back.

Last month, Reuters reported that Blockbuster is preparing to offer a new in-store subscription that would allow customers to rent an unlimited number of movies for $24.99 a month and suffer no late fees.

The company is also considering creating an online subscription that would allow customers to rent movies via the Internet.

Netflix’s founder and CEO Reed Hastings recently told the The New York Times that he welcomes the competition because it proves Netflix must be doing something right.

“It’s going to be a lot harder for them to stop us now,” Hastings told The Times, referring to Blockbuster. “There’s a pure adrenaline excitement in Netflix, in whether we can take on Blockbuster and win.”

Hastings already has set some lofty goals for Netflix.

In February, Hastings announced he expects Netflix to reach $1 billion in revenue and secure 5 million members by 2006.

Netflix is also planning on getting into the video-on-demand game, despite the fact that many financial continued on page 22

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continued from page 20 advisers like Rick Munarriz of The Motley Fool have stated that video-ondemand is currently impractical.

“Even broadband connections make quality video downloads a lengthy process,” Munarriz wrote in his April 26 column. “Let’s face it. Who wants to spend a stay-at-home night with a spouse, date or family crowded around a computer monitor for a couple of hours to catch a new release?”

Munarriz pointed out that even the major movie studios like Sony and Time Warner have struggled with video-ondemand services like Movielink.

But Hastings still sees video-on-demand as the future and has announced a target date of 2005 to enter into that market.

And when Hastings has a hunch, he’s proven he should follow it.

After all, the idea for Netflix came as a result of Hastings renting “Apollo 13” from his local Blockbuster and forgetting to return it. When he finally brought back the video and was faced with a $40 late fee, Hastings realized there must be a better way to rent movies.

A few years later, Netflix was born.

“We are always on the forefront of what’s new and, as our CEO likes to say, ‘We are called Netflix for a reason and not DVDs by mail because we are all about getting movies to our subscribers in the best possible way,’” said Clouston of Netflix. “Now, we believe DVDs have a long, long life ahead of them. Needless to say, most of the country is not going to move over to video-on-demand any

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time soon, but that said, we will begin testing it I think in the next year or two.

“Our CEO has said publicly he wants to make sure that we are always giving consumers what they want.”

Of course, as with the birth of any new

There was also some bad news for subscribers.

Hastings announced that Netflix plans to raise its standard monthly fee from $19.95 to $21.99 beginning in mid-June.

“Over the past four years Netflix has

“Whether you like off-thewall type movies, horror movies, old movies, new movies, whatever. The selection is incredible.”

— Ron Cockerille, a Netflix subscriber

company, Netflix has experienced some growing pains along the way.

On April 16, one day after Netflix’s most recent quarterly report indicated the company posted a wider-than-anticipated quarterly net loss due to higher marketing costs, Netflix’s stock suffered a major nose dive, dropping $6.27, or 16.9 percent, to $30.75 a share.

created the premier online DVD rental service and transformed the home entertainment experience of nearly two million members,” Hastings stated in Netflix’s past quarterly report. “As we continue investments in this service, we are changing its price to reflect the robust offering we provide and the inherent value of that service.”

While all that might sound reasonable for investors, it still equates to an increase for consumers.

But Clouston believes that most of the company’s subscribers won’t mind paying a little extra for better service rather than returning to the dreaded video store.

“I think most people just don’t like going to the local video store at all,” Clouston said. “When you go to the video store, beyond the fact that you feel like you’re paying a lot of money for one movie, I know I feel like someone is looking over my shoulder and trying to see what I rent.

“With Netflix, there is such freedom with the way that we offer the movie rental experience because you can try anything. You can rent something that is bad, you can rent something you might not like, you can rent something that is just an experiment and it’s OK. Netflix gives you the freedom to try movies without feeling like, ‘Oh, gosh, I have to watch it because I paid so much for it.’”

When Cockerille of Aiken learned of the anticipated $2 increase, he said $21.99 is nothing compared to what he used to pay local video stores each month in rental and late fees.

“That’s nothing,” Cockerille said.

“When you think about $21 a month, that’s the equivalent to about four or five movies at Blockbuster. With Netflix, throughout the month, heck, you can end up with at least 15 movies.

“So, I would recommend Netflix to anybody. Anybody who really enjoys movies.”

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BITE Sample Authentic Mexican at San Jose

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

eah, yeah, yeah … so Cinco de Mayo is over.

So what? Does anyone really need a holiday to enjoy good Mexican food?

I don’t, so when I noticed Super Mercado San Jose, a Hispanic grocery store and taqueria located in a strip center at the corner of Washington and Fury’s Ferry roads, I decided to stop in. I have always heard that ethnic groceries are a great place to sample authentic, inexpensive food, so this was an experiment of sorts, and I’m happy to report that, at least in this case, the theory holds true.

Sure, San Jose serves the Mexican dishes so familiar to many of us: Nachos, burritos, fajitas and tacos all appear on the menu.

They also serve dishes I’ve heard of but never seen on a typical Mexican restaurant menu.

Menudo grande (tripe soup)?

Tortas (a Mexican take on the sub sandwich)? Yep, all there.

You can also order burritos, tacos, tortas and quesadillas with more authentic fillings that the uninitiated might be a little wary of. Alongside more familiar fillings like grilled chicken, grilled steak and the Mexican sausage chrorizo are things like tripa (beef tripe), cabeza (beef head) and lengua (beef tongue).

Lengua tacos were a staple of the food trucks that populated the Los Angeles area when I lived there. I never worked up the nerve to try them then, and although I vowed to order one if San Jose had them on the menu, I wimped out here as well. After placing my rather mundane order, however, I confessed my fears to the man working the counter and he convinced me to at least taste it.

Handing over a small plastic cup filled with cubes of what looked like ordinary steak, he gave me a fork and stood by to make sure I didn’t throw it in the trash while he wasn’t looking. (I’d never make it on a show like “Fear Factor.”) The meat, obviously slow-cooked, tasted oddly enough like pot roast. If someone gave me this

That fear conquered, I took our Mexican sodas (one strawberry, one Mandarin — both very sweet) to the table where my daughter was happily chomping away on a frozen fruit pop she found in a freezer case as soon as we walked in. No complimentary chips and salsa to keep me busy, we passed the time admiring the fancy children’s dresses the store also sells.

There’s a warning of sorts on the menu asking patrons to allow them time to prepare orders correctly, but my two taco combo ($5.45) came to the table in about five minutes. The tacos — one chicken, one beef — were served alongside the ubiquitous rice and beans (both better flavored than what I’m used to) but that is where the similarities ended.

These tacos were each made with two corn tortillas that, while warmed, were not the crunchy shells you get at other places if you don’t specify soft tacos. And there was nothing inside the tacos except the meat, although there is a mini salad bar in one corner that has lettuce, limes and a variety of condiments. They’re not labeled but, with a couple of exceptions, you can pretty much figure it out.

I picked three sauces, including a salsa, a vinegary orange sauce with flecks of red pepper and what looked and tasted like a soupy guacamole. The vinegar was good with the steak and the guac was good with the chicken, but, truthfully, I ended up eating the meat (with a fork — the tacos are virtually impossible to pick up) by itself. Grilled, well-flavored and tender, neither needed much of anything.

Cheese isn’t on the bar, but they’ll bring you some if you ask. Do, because this isn’t cheddar — the shredded white cheese is delicious and melts to a wonderfully creamy consistency when it hits anything remotely warm.

San Jose also serves desserts, but their entrée portion was so big that we didn’t have any room. So we settled for a quick stroll through the small but extensive grocery store before leaving.

Maybe next time I’ll have room for dessert … and I’ll be brave enough to order a lengua taco. without telling me what it was, I probably wouldn’t have noticed a difference in taste, although I would definitely notice the difference in texture (this was a little spongier than regular beef).

Super Mercado San Jose is located at 3177 Washington Road, (706) 869-0330. Hours are 9 a.m.-9 p.m. seven days a week. They accept Visa and MasterCard.

Photo by Joe White

in the mix You may know David Wright from Barberitos. You might have seen him at Calvert’s, where he also works. Or you might just know him as the crazy, ‘80s night guy at the Soul Bar. Wherever you’ve seen him, he’s probably made an impression. Whether you know him or not, it’s not difficult to get David started on virtually any subject. Just ask him about his eventful trip home from the Fox’s Lair one night, the time he worked for a company that made women’s personal hygiene products or being a new uncle — there’s no doubt you’ll get a colorful answer that will leave you laughing.

First crush on a famous person I guess Jeannie from “I Dream of Jeannie.” I mean, she was totally good-looking, but it was that head thing she did with the hat and the ponytail. She didn’t even need to make any wishes come true — she could just do that all day.

His worst vice Dancing, it has to be dancing. I’m addicted — it’s terrible. And laughing. Dancing and laughing.

Velma or Daphne?

Velma, definitely. It’s those glasses. I don’t know what it is about the glasses, but ever since middle school I was like, “Wow — you wear glasses, huh?” It’s that whole nerd thing. I always wanted that T-shirt that says, “Talk nerdy to me.”

He always gets caught…

I think I’d have to go with dancing again. I always get caught dancing, not that I really care. I’ll be going down the aisles in the grocery store dancing. It’s an everyday thing. Dancing is a big part of my life.

What he thinks of the movie “Footloose” I watched it recently and it was like, “What?” I saw it when I was little, but I had no idea that the whole idea of the movie was that there was a town with no dancing.

David Wright

Three things in his refrigerator Microwave popcorn — I don’t know why that’s in there, half of a beer and … what is that? Oh, pizza sauce but no pizza.

Escalade or H2?

I’m an Escalade guy, actually. I’m not really impressed by either, but one day I was at the gas station and this guy rolls up — he’s listening to some R&B and he gets out and leans against his car while he’s pumping gas with his sunglasses on and I’m like, “Man, I could see myself doing that.”

Favorite time of day (or night) Two a.m. right when the bars are shutting down but everybody’s still there. I like that — everybody’s just kind of standing around talking.

Server, Barberitos

George is on...

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

Continuous Country Favorites

25

ART S Augusta Opera Presents “Rigoletto” —— With Surtitles

I

was once told that “Rigoletto” is a wonderful piece for opera virgins to see, because it will make their first experience a traditional one.

For one thing, it’s an old favorite. For another, it’s in Italian.

Metro Spirit recently asked Mark Flint, the general and artistic director of Augusta Opera, to tell us a little bit about his company’s upcoming production of “Rigoletto.”

“Well it is a masterpiece of 19th-century Italian opera written by Verdi and it was premiered in 1851 — and it has been really a stalwart of the opera repertoire ever since. It’s one of his most famous works.”

Flint said the opera is actually based on a play by Victor Hugo called “Le Rois’ Amuse,” or “The King Entertains Himself.”

Now, Flint said, the manner in which this king entertained himself made the play a bit controversial. “Because of political reasons, when the opera was written, they couldn’t make it a king; they had to make it a duke.

“In the play, the duke is a libertine — a big playboy. And in his court is a jester. His name is Rigoletto.

“The duke has seduced one of the court’s patriarchs’ daughters and has essentially deflowered her.”

Well, as jesters will do, Rigoletto sets about making fun of the count whose daughter has fallen prey to the duke’s whims, so the count puts a father’s curse on the jester.

Production: “Rigoletto” by Verdi Company: Augusta Opera Venue: The Imperial Theatre Dates: May 13 and 15, 8 p.m.; May 16, 3 p.m.

For Info: (706) 826-4710

GARY SIMPSON PLAYS RIGOLETTO IN THE AUGUSTA OPERA PRODUCTION. “Unknown to the court, Rigoletto has a daughter, whose name is Gilda, and Gilda is the only thing in the world that Rigoletto loves. And the court, being nasty at this time, abducted Gilda. They think she’s his lover.

Production: “Brighton Beach Memoirs” Company: Aiken Community Playhouse Venue: Washington Center for the Performing Arts, Aiken Dates: May 14-15, 21-23 and 28-29 For Info: (803) 648-1438 and www.aikencommunityplayhouse.com

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

A b o l ut You l A s ’ t !

I s g a b d Han elry Jew

Hom D eco e r

PEACHTREE BOUTIQUE

359 Fury’s Ferry Road • Martinez, GA • 228-1599

By Rhonda Jones

“So they abduct her and the duke sees her and she, unfortunately, falls in love with the duke. And once Rigoletto realizes what has happened, the curse is fulfilled, so Rigoletto plots his vengeance.”

This vengeance is to be served by an assassin and his sister in an inn on the wrong side of the carriage-tracks. The sister lures the duke there for an affair. But, of course, plans never go smoothly, in life or in fiction.

“Gilda, who overhears this plot, disguises herself as a young boy, knocks on the door and is killed herself,” Flint said. Thinking they’ve killed the duke, the assassins bring the body to Rigoletto, who doesn’t realize it’s his daughter until the final moments of the opera.

“So it is a true tragedy,” Flint said. “With some of the most beautiful music ever written. We will be singing it in Italian with English surtitles, very much like we did with last year’s ‘Tosca.’”

I asked him if he thought many people found the opera intimidating, especially when it’s in Italian.

“I don’t think so,” he said, applauding the use of surtitles, which he credits for increasing the genre’s accessibility. They were introduced, he said, in the 1980s, and caused a huge controversy. He said, though, that as a conductor, he noticed that the appearance of the surtitle screens put a stop to the distracting sound of programs rustling in the auditorium.

The surtitles are handled, Flint said, by powerpoint, with the screen suspended right above the proscenium.

Production: “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” Company: Georgia Shakespeare Festival Venue: Piedmont Park, Atlanta Dates: May 12-16 Cost: FREE! For Info: (404) 504-3401 or www.gashakespeare.org

DUI

HEALTH PAGE Take care of yourself. Let University help.

Tune in on Monday, May 10 at 9:15 a.m. to hear Jennifer B. Bartley, M.D., a board-certified obstetrician and gynecologist on University’s Medical Staff, discuss osteoporosis.

Learn More About Health and Wellness University Health Care System publishes three newsletters to help you and your family remain fit and healthy. These newsletters deliver important health information and keep you informed on special events and classes throughout the year. They include University Seniors Club, a publication for men and women 50 and older, Check Up, a general health publication and Uniquely You, which focuses on women’s health issues. To subscribe to any of these newsletters, call 706/868-3231.

Preventing Melanoma If you’re heading to the beach this summer, remember this. Melanoma, the deadliest type of skin cancer, is caused by too much exposure to the sun. “Melanoma affects the Avis Yount, M.D., pigment-producing skin cells, which Dermatologist become abnormal, grow uncontrollably and aggressively invade surrounding tissues,” says Avis Yount, M.D., a board-certified dermatologist on University Hospital’s Medical Staff. The disease may affect only the skin, or it may spread to other organs and bones.

Risk factors for melanoma include: • fair skin • a history of sunburns during childhood • intermittent and intense sun exposure • a sunny or high altitude climate • a family or personal history of melanoma • numerous moles and atypical moles • regular use of sun-tanning devices The following steps will help prevent melanoma.

• Avoid the sun between 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

• Stay away from tanning beds.

• Wear sunscreen year-round.

• Wear protective clothing.

“If you find changes in an existing mole or a new, unusual looking growth that fits the ABCDs of melanoma, see your physician immediately,” says Dr. Yount.

A is for asymmetry. Be alert to irregularly shaped moles.

B is for border. Watch for notched, scalloped or vaguely defined borders.

C is for color. Look for growths with many colors or uneven colors.

D is for diameter. Growths larger than the diameter of a pencil eraser may signal trouble.

Also watch for moles that are scaly, itchy, change texture, spread into surrounding skin, have a discharge or bleed.

Finally, follow the American Cancer Society’s screening guidelines for melanoma. Adults between the ages of 20-40 should have head-totoe melanoma exams every three years, then annually after age 40. Everyone 18 or older should conduct monthly self-exams.

“Keeping Off the Bypass Track” Mike Watts, M.D., cardiologist Tuesday, May 11 5:30-7:30 p.m.

FREE dinner University Hospital dining Mike Watts, M.D., rooms 1-3 Cardiologist Reservations required. Call 706/868-3231 or 800/413-6652.

To register for your FREE class, just call 724-4408 ext. 224

HEALTH SCREENINGS Wellness Wednesdays May 12, 19, 26 9 a.m.-noon

HEALTH INFORMATION , CALL

Chapter 1899 Central Ave. For more information, call 706/731-9060.

University Seniors Club, 4106 Columbia Road Includes FREE blood pressure, glucose, and height and weight screenings.

For Seniors Club members only.

No appointment necessary. For information call 706/868-3231 or 800/413-6652.

Better Breathers May 11 11:30 a.m.

Sponsored by the American Lung Association and University’s Cardiopulmonary Rehabilitation Center.

For people with emphysema, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and asthma.

For more information, call 706/774-5864.

Speech and Hearing Screenings For adults and children University’s Speech and Hearing Center Corner of St. Sebastian Way and 13th Street. $10 Appointments required. Call 706/774-5777.

Pink Magnolias Breast Cancer May 10 7 p.m.

University Breast Health Center Professional Center 2, Suite 205 For more information, call 706/774-4141.

Sexual Assault Rape Crisis and Sexual Assault Services offers FREE group counseling for victims of sexual assault including rape, date rape and childhood sexual abuse regardless of when the assault occurred and whether or not it was reported. For more information about their groups or other services, please call 706/724-5200.

Alzheimer’s Disease May 11 7 p.m.

Alzheimer’s Association Augusta

Log on to learn more: www.universityhealth.org

SUPPORT GROUPS

ASK•A•NURSE

AT

Become an anonymous egg donor!

Ovations is seeking healthy, educated women between the ages of 18-31, living in or going to college in the Aiken-Augusta area. Suitable donors will be compensated in the sum of

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For more information call 733-0130 1-866-517-7513

737-8423 (SER-VICE)

OR

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TODAY !

A U G U S TA

Present

o t t e l o g i di

By Ver

R May 13 - 8pm May 15 - 8pm and May 16 - 3pm

at the Imperial Theatre

Tickets $15 - $45 Student & Senior Discounts available

ORDER ONLINE AT WWW.AUGUSTAOPERA.COM

or call 706.826.4710 ext. 22

Augusta

O

pera

Mark D. Flint

General & Artistic Director

Sponsors: Georgia Council for the Arts, Azalea Inn, Courtyard by Marriott, Valueboards, RedWolf, Inc.

27

F OR FREE 24- HOUR

“Summer, Sun and Proper Skin Care - Melanoma and Other Skin Cancers” Avis Yount, M.D., dermatologist Thursday, May 20 5:30-7:30 p.m.

Avis Yount, M.D., FREE dinner Dermatologist University Hospital dining rooms 1-3 Reservations required. Call 706/868-3231 or 800/413-6652.

priceless

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

BODYPUMP™ is hailed as The Fastest Way in the Universe to Get in Shape, and Health Central is the only facility in Augusta to offer this revolutionary program. It’s designed to work your entire body for maximum results in minimum time. Right now, there’s never been a better time to pump up your fitness routine with our special offer including two months free membership with annual membership, plus no enrollment fee and a free half-hour massage.

347 Greene Street • Augusta, Georgia

(706) 724-3331

For more information on cancer or for a FREE Cancer Risk Appraisal, call University’s Cancer Line at 706/828-2522 or toll free 866/869-2522.

Your resource for healthy living.

COMMUNITY EDUCATION

William Sussman

———ATTORNEY AT LAW ———

O

“HealthTalk” on WRDW Radio - 1630 AM

Free Phone Call

Sesame Chicken White meat chicken lightly battered, fried until golden brown, then sauteed with authentic fragrant sesame sauce.

Ginger Shrimp Sauteed jumbo shrimp with ginger and scallions.

Served with Chineese green cabbage as bedding.

Steamed Seabass with Ginger Sauce

Szechuan Garden Chinese Restaurant is now open in the former location of the China Garden. Authentic Chinese cuisine, cooked with no MSG, using only vegetable oil, is a healthy treat for lunch or dinner. We have honored the former owners of the China Garden, an Augusta institution for over 30 years, by bringing back their famous Louise’s Special Shrimp using Louise and Perry’s own recipe. Our chef has over 30 years experience and we pride ourselves on using only the freshest, finest ingredients available. We feature a lunch buffet for $4.95, which you are sure to enjoy. For dinner, we offer special dishes a la carte. Stop by today and try our Szechuan, Hunan and Cantonese style cooking. Thank you.

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

Lunch Buffet

4

$ 95

1535 Walton Way Tel: (706) 738-2302 Fax: (706) 738-7949

OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK

Mon-Thurs 11:00 am - 10:00 pm Fri & Sat 11:00 am - 10:30 pm Sunday 11:30 - 10:00 pm

BUY 10 LUNCH BUFFETS, GET THE 11TH ONE FREE

Buy One Entree, Get 2nd of Equal or Lesser Value 1/2 Price Dine in or take out only. Limit one per table Not good for buffet. Expires 05-13-04

Kids

Learning

Volunteers

Sports

Calendar Health

Education

Out of Town Music

Special

Benefits Meetings Theater Auditions Exhibitions Attractions MuseumsArts Seniors Dance Arts

Music 11TH ANNUAL BLIND WILLIE MCTELL BLUES FESTIVAL will be held May 22 in Thomson. Gates open at 11 a.m. Music starts at noon. Festival ends at 9 p.m.

Advanced tix $15; day of show $20. For info, visit www.blindwillie.com or call (706) 597-1000.

Auditions ENOPION THEATRE COMPANY is looking for volunteers to act, sing, sew, build and more for their new musical, “Creation.” Applications are available at www.imaryproductions.com or by calling (803) 442-9039.

THE 12 BANDS OF CHRISTMAS is now accepting submissions for the 2004 12 Bands of Christmas benefit and concert. Last year’s event raised $10,000 for MCG’s Children’s Medical Center. If you are an aspiring singer/songwriter or in a band, record a demo of an original or traditional Christmas song that you would like included on this year’s compilation. Artists will be chosen based on performance and song, not the quality of the recording. Submission is free, but CDs will not be returned. Include your name, band name, phone number, e-mail address and song name on the CD. There is no guarantee that your song will be used. If selected as one of the 12 Bands of Christmas, you will receive recording and production time with producer Ruskin Yeargain for the song that you submitted. You will also be a featured act in December at the Imperial Theatre concert. All costs of this, including any licensing fees, will be paid by Bordertown Music. This is a non-profit fund-raiser. Mail your CDs to 12 Bands of Christmas, Attention: Joe Stevenson, 3208 A Mike Padgett Hwy., Augusta, GA 30906. E-mail MP3s to jstevenson@bellsouth.net.

Deadline is June 1.

SWEET ADELINES HARMONY RIVER CHORUS OPEN REHEARSAL for singers each Thursday at 7 p.m. at Church of Christ, 600 Martintown Rd. in North Augusta.

They are on the lookout for voices in the lower ranges.

Contact Stacy Branch at 877-9931.

THE BEECH ISLAND HISTORICAL SOCIETY is looking for a couple to duplicate a wedding that took place on the Sandbar Ferry Bridge in 1924. Clothing, vintage automobile, media coverage, minister and music will be provided at no cost to the wedding couple. The Historical Society would like the groom to be from Georgia and the bride to be from South Carolina. For more information, contact Joan Harrison at (803) 827-3209 or The Beech Island Historical Society at (803) 867-3600.

DIASPRA PRODUCTIONS will begin holding auditions for a Feb. 2005 production of “The Village,” a multi-ethnic gospel stage play. Needed: actors, singers, dancers, stage hands and musicians. Dates: May 10 at Wallace Branch Library, 6-8 p.m.; May 15 at Maxwell Branch Library, 10 a.m.-12 p.m.; May 17 at Springfield Baptist Church, 6-8 p.m. Call toll-free 1-877-752-6022.

YOUNG ARTISTS REPERTORY THEATRE COMPANY will hold auditions for “The Adventures of Doctor Dolittle,” a musical, May 10-11 in the lower school cafetorium of Augusta Preparatory School, starting at 6:30 p.m. Call 210-8915 for details.

Education ISRAELI DANCE WORKSHOP at the Augusta Jewish Community Center Sunday afternoons, 4-5 p.m. Open to teens and adults; no experience or partners are necessary.

Cost is $2 per session, with the first session free. For information or to schedule a pre-class beginner/refresher session, contact Jackie Cohen, 738-9016.

or at the Augusta Jewish Community Center. Call 7310008 for details.

Exhibitions RICHARD JOLLEY, sculptor of glass, will display works through May 9 at the Morris Museum of Art. For more information, call 724-7501.

JANOS ENYEDI: THE AMERICAN INDUSTRIAL LANDSCAPE — RECONSTRUCTED will be on view at the Morris Museum of Art through May 30. For more information, call 724-7501.

WORKS OF TOM NAKASHIMA AND JANOS ENYEDI will be on display at the Mary Pauline Gallery through May 29. For more information, call 724-9542.

HARRIET MARSHALL GOODE, “PERSONAL HISTORY BOX,” watercolor and acrylic paintings will be shown through May 29 at Rabold Gallery in Aiken. (703) 641-4405.

THE 521 ALL-STARS: A CHAMPIONSHIP STORY OF BASEBALL AND COMMUNITY will be on display at The

Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History through June 30.

ONE-DAY ARTISTS’ MARKET co-sponsored by the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art to take place at Augusta Mall May 8. For info, call (706) 722-5495, (803) 278-7322 or visit www.ghia.org.

Dance THE AUGUSTA INTERNATIONAL FOLK DANCE CLUB meets Thursday evenings at 7:30 p.m. No partners are needed and newcomers are welcome. Call 737-6299 for location and info.

AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE UNITED STATES AMATEUR BALLROOM DANCERS ASSOCIATION holds a dance the first Saturday of each month, from 7:15-11 p.m. Cost is $7 for members and $10 for non-members.

Held at the BPOE facility on Elkdom Court. Contact Melvis Lovett, 733-3890, or Jean Avery, 863-4186, for information.

GREATER AUGUSTA YOUTH ORCHESTRA to give their spring concert May 10 at ASU. Call 737-1453.

MUSIC AND ART IN THE PARK series begins May 13 with the North Augusta High School Chorus. Presented by the North Augusta Cultural Arts Council. The series features eight live music performances and displays of artwork by local artists. Concerts start at 7 p.m. and take place at the Creighton Living History Park at the corner of West Avenue and Spring Grove in downtown North Augusta. Free. Bring a picnic and blanket or chairs. Call 278-0938 or e-mail wbutler26@comcast.net.

COLUMBIA COUNTY CHORAL SOCIETY presents “Favorite Jewels: Hymns, Anthems and Spirituals” May 14 at 7:30 p.m. at First Baptist Church of Evans. Tickets are $6 for seniors and students and $8 general admission. For info, call (706) 650-8901 or visit www.ccchoralsociety.org.

THE AUGUSTA CHILDREN’S CHORALE will perform a complimentary community concert on May 11 at 7 p.m. in the sanctuary of First Baptist Church of Augusta. The chorale sang most recently in Washington, D.C. for the congressional spouses at the invitation of Gloria Norwood, wife of Georgia Congressman Charlie Norwood. Contact patricia.sims@knology.net.

HOPELANDS SUMMER CONCERT SERIES continues May 10 with Fabio Mann & Friends and May 17 with the Savannah River Winds and takes place at Hopeland Gardens in Aiken at 7 p.m. Concerts will be held every

29

ART CLASSES FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS at the Art Factory. The Art Factory also has a homeschool program and scholarships are available. Programs include painting, pottery, pilates, hip-hop, modern dance and more.

Classes are held at the Art Factory, 418 Crawford Ave.,

“WOMAN IN A FEININGER STILL LIFE” BY HARRIET MARSHALL GOODE IS ON DISPLAY AT RABOLD GALLERY IN AIKEN.

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

ART CLASSES AND WORKSHOPS are offered year-round at the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art. Classes and workshops are open to toddlers through adults and feature instruction in drawing, painting, photography, pottery, weaving and sculpture. For a newsletter or detailed information on registering for classes at the Gertrude Herbert, call 722-5495. The Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art also offers educational tours; for information, contact the education director at the above telephone number.

ANNUAL SUMMER CONCERT SERIES AT HOPELANDS in Aiken continues May 10 with Fabio Mann & Friends.

Call (803) 643-4661.

week from May to August on the Roland H. Windham Performing Arts Stage. Performances will include a variety of music styles, as well as dance and vocal concerts.

Please bring a lawn chair or blanket to sit on. Food is welcome but alcohol is prohibited. In case of inclement weather, please call 643-4661 for info.

eligible for special discounts. Dates are May 10-16. For info, call the Augusta Metro Convention & Visitors Bureau at (800) 726-0243 or (706) 823-6600.

A TASTE OF DOWNTOWN AIKEN takes place May 20, 4:30-8 p.m. It is a self-guided walking tour of Aiken venues, with tickets listing the participating businesses.

Event goers may begin and end their tour at any stop.

Your ticket will be a T-shirt, which you must wear or carry with you. Venues will be listed on the shirt so that volunteers can mark off each tour location in the space provided. Cost is $15 in advance and $20 the day of the event. For info, call (803) 649-2221.

JAZZ ON FILM ends Tuesday, May 11 at 7 p.m. at the Morris Museum of Art, and will feature Eddie Jefferson with Richie Cole and The Shelly Manne Quartet. Admission is $5 general, $4 seniors and military. Free to museum members. For more info or to sponsor one showing of the series, call quietSTORM at (706) 495-6238.

Out of Town

Theatre “FOSSE,” the Tony Award-winning smash musical highlighting the work of legendary dancer, choreographer and director Bob Fosse, will be at the Bell Auditorium May 20. Call (706) 722-3521 or visit info@arcc.com for more info.

GEORGIA RENAISSANCE FESTIVAL runs through June 6 from 10:30 a.m.-6 p.m. For info, visit www.georgiarenaissancefestival.com/.

AT THE GEORGIA MUSEUM OF ART in Athens, Ga.: “Leaving for the Country: George Bellows at Woodstock” through May 16. Visit www.uga.edu/gamuseum or call (706) 542-4662 for info.

FORT GORDON DINNER THEATRE presents “Second Samuel” by Pamela Parker, May 14-15, 20-22. Dinner 7 p.m.; show 8 p.m. Call 793-8552 for reservations and info or visit www.fortgordon.com. Open to the public.

Bring your photo ID to enter Fort Gordon.

“HANSEL AND GRETEL” to be presented by the ASU Born to Read Literacy Center and Patchwork Players May 17 at 9 a.m., 10 a.m. and 11 a.m. at the Maxwell Performing Arts Center. Call (706) 733-7043.

Attractions MOTORIZED TOURS OF HISTORIC AIKEN every Saturday, 10-11:30 a.m. Tours leave from the Washington Center for the Performing Arts. Reservations are required, and patrons must be age 2 and older.

(803) 642-7631.

AUGUSTA CANAL INTERPRETIVE CENTER: Housed in Enterprise Mill, the center contains displays and models focusing on the Augusta Canal’s functions and importance to the textile industry. Hours are Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m. and Sun., 1-6 p.m. Admission is $5 adult, $4 seniors and military and $3 children ages 6-18.

Children under 6 admitted free. Guided boat tours of the Augusta Canal depart from the docks at Enterprise Mill at 11 a.m., 1:30 p.m. and 3 p.m. Saturdays and Tuesdays and Thursdays at 11 a.m. and 1:30 p.m. Tour tickets are $6 adults, $5 seniors and $4 students and children. For tour information, call 823-7089. For other info, visit www.augustacanal.com or call 823-0440.

THE BOYHOOD HOME OF WOODROW WILSON: Circa 1859 Presbyterian manse occupied by the family of President Woodrow Wilson as a child during the Civil War and Reconstruction. Original and period antiques, restored house, kitchen and carriage house. 419 Seventh Street. Open 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Tues.-Sat. Tours available; groups of 10 or more by appointment only.

Admission is $5 adults, $4 seniors, $3 students under 18 and free for ages 5 and under. 722-9828.

AUGUSTA GOLF & BOTANICAL GARDENS OF THE GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME features beautiful display gardens, as well as bronze sculptures of some of golf’s greatest masters. Available for rent for a variety of functions. Group discount rates available. Closed Mondays; open from 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Tues.-Sat.; open from 1-5 p.m. on Sunday. Admission is $5.50 for adults; $4.50 for students, seniors and military; $3.50 for children (4-12); free for children 3 and under. Sundays are two for one with a Super Sunday coupon. Annual garden memberships are available. Call 724-4443 or 1-888874-4443. Also, visit their Web site at www.gghf.org.

NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER’S FORT DISCOVERY: Children and adults alike can immerse themselves in the wonders of science through live demonstrations, virtual realities, Starlab, KidScape and more than 250 hands-on exhibits. General Admission: $8 for adults; $6 for children, seniors and active military. Group rates available.

Operating hours: Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday, noon-5 p.m. Call 821-0200, 1-800-325-5445 or visit their Web site at www.NationalScienceCenter.org.

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

REDCLIFFE STATE HISTORIC SITE: 1859 mansion of S.C. Governor James Henry Hammond, held by the family for three generations until 1975. Grounds and slave quarters are open Thursday-Monday, 9 a.m.-6 p.m.

House tours will be offered at 1, 2 and 3 p.m. Admission to the grounds is free. Fee for house tours is $3 for adults and children ages 6-17. For more information, call (803) 827-1473. 181 Redcliffe Road, Beech Island.

SACRED HEART CULTURAL CENTER is offering tours of its 100-year-old building. Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m. $1 per person, children free. 826-4700.

30

AUGUSTA VISITORS INFORMATION CENTER open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sun. 1-5 p.m. Located inside the Augusta Museum of History. Call 724-4067.

GREYHOUND MEET AND GREET MAY 8 AT WAL-MART IN EVANS, 10 A.M.-2 P.M. CALL (706) 854-0098.

THE EZEKIEL HARRIS HOUSE: Deemed “the finest 18th century house surviving in Georgia” by the “Smithsonian Guide to Historic America.” Open Saturday, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. General admission is $2; senior admission is $1 and children get in for 50 cents. For more information, call 724-0436.

PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK: See egrets, blue herons, river otters and elusive alligators in their natural setting, just minutes from downtown Augusta. The park has observation decks, boardwalks and several nature trails suitable for hiking. Open Monday-Friday, noon-dusk, and Saturday and Sunday, dawn to dusk. On May 8, there will be a nature photography class. For more information, call the Southeastern Natural Sciences Academy Office at 828-2109.

ALIENS LAND AT FORT DISCOVERY May 8-Labor Day. Call (706) 821-0607 or visit dimmockk@nscdiscovery.org.

FARMERS MARKET ON BROAD returns every Saturday until Sept. 25. Located beside Health Central on Macartan Street from 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Call (706) 722-7245.

Museums THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART in Ware’s Folly exhibits works by local and regional artists. Art classes, workshops and other educational programming for children, youth and adults are held in the Walker-Mackenzie Studio. Open TuesdayFriday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Saturday by appointment only. Admission is free, but a donation of $2 for adults and $1 for children and seniors is encouraged.

Call 722-5495 or visit www.ghia.org for more info.

THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY hosts permanent exhibition “Augusta’s Story,” an award-winning exhibit encompassing 12,000 years of local history. For the younger crowd, there’s the Susan L. Still Children’s Discovery Gallery, where kids can learn about history in a hands-on environment. The museum also shows films in the History Theatre and hosts a variety of programs.

Located at 560 Reynolds Street. Open TuesdaySaturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sunday, 1-5 p.m. New permanent exhibition, “Into the Interior: A History of the Georgia Railroad and Banking Company,” opens April 30. Admission is $4 adult, $3 seniors, $2 kids (6-18 years of age) and free for children under 6. Free admission on Sundays. Call 722-8454 or visit www.augustamuseum.org for more information.

AUGUSTA AND THE AVIATION MOVEMENT is a lecture to be given by Dr. Edward J. Cashin as part of the Augusta Museum of History’s Brown Bag History Series May 19 at noon. Call (706) 722-8454 for reservations

by May 18.

THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART hosts exhibitions and special events year-round. The Children’s Performance Series continues May 8 with Aztec Dance of Mexico.

Closed on Mondays and major holidays. 1 Tenth Street, Augusta. Call 724-7501 or visit www.themorris.org for details.

THE MUSEUM OF LAUREL AND HARDY OF HARLEM, GEORGIA features displays of various Laurel and Hardy memorabilia; films also shown. Located at 250 N.

Louisville Street in downtown Harlem. Open 1-4 p.m.

Thursday-Monday. For more information, call 556-3448.

LUNCH AT NOON LECTURE SERIES held the second Wednesday of every month at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Call the museum at 724-3576 for more information.

Special Events AUGUSTA SHOWCASE, an economic development campaign to market the area to potential business residents, will soon be underway. The Augusta Metro Chamber of Commerce is giving presentations on the effort. Contact Tammy Stout, 722-8326, ext. 2, to schedule a speaker for your club or civic group.

MCDUFFIE FRIENDS OF ANIMALS holds pet adoptions each Saturday, 1-3 p.m. at Superpetz on Bobby Jones Expressway. Call 556-9090 or visit www.petfinder.com.

AT THE HIGH MUSEUM OF ART in Atlanta: “Glories of Ancient Egypt,” through Sept. 19; and “African Gold From the Glassell Collection,” through Sept. 19. Call (404) 733-HIGH or visit www.high.org for information.

ALLIANCE THEATRE COMPANY presents “A Death in the House Next Door to Kathleen Turner’s House on Long Island” through May 30. Call the season ticket office at (404) 733-4600, the box office at (404) 7335000 or visit www.alliancetheatre.org.

THE ATLANTA JAZZ FESTIVAL takes place through May 31 in venues throughout Atlanta. Free. Visit www.atlantafestivals.com.

ATLANTA’S NEW AMERICAN SHAKESPEARE TAVERN presents “A Man for All Seasons” through May 9.

(404) 874-5299.

NEW FDR MUSEUM IN WARM SPRINGS, GA. at the Little White House site. For info, call (706) 655-5870 or visit www.fdr-whitehouse.org.

Benefits AUGUSTA BALLET MERCEDES RAFFLE: The Augusta Ballet will raffle off a 2004 Mercedes CLK 320 Cabriolet during the May 7 First Friday celebration. Tickets are $100 each and may be purchased through the ballet office at 261-0555.

COLUMBIA COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and every Sunday from 1-4 p.m. at PetsMart. For more info, call 860-5020.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL is in need of dog and cat food, cat litter and other pet items, as well as monetary donations to help pay for vaccinations. Donations accepted during regular business hours, Tues.-Sun., 1-5 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Call 790-6836 for information.

RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL AND AUGUSTA ANIMAL RESCUE FRIENDS hold pet adoptions at Superpetz off Bobby Jones Expressway every Sunday from 1-4 p.m. Call AARF at 364-4747 or visit www.aarf.net. Adoptions also held at the Richmond County Animal Control Shelter, Tues.-Sun., 1-5 p.m. Call the shelter at 790-6836.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER BLOOD DRIVES in various locations around the CSRA this month. For detailed information on locations and times to donate, visit www.shepeardblood.org. You may also call Susan Edwards at (803) 643-7996 for information on Aiken locations and Nancy Szocinski at 737-4551 for information on all other locations.

THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. and every Wednesday evening from 5:30-7:30 p.m. at the Pet Center located behind the GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Rd. 261-PETS.

AMERICAN RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVES take place at the Aiken Red Cross Blood Center on Millbrook Drive and the Augusta Red Cross Blood Center on Pleasant Home Road. The bloodmobile will also stop at various area locations this week. For a complete list, call the Aiken Blood Center at (803) 642-5180 or the Augusta Blood Center at 868-8800.

MOLLY’S MILITIA, a pet adoption agency, meets each Saturday at Superpetz in Aiken from 11 a.m.-3 p.m., Petsmart in Aiken from 3-6:30 p.m., and Petsmart in Augusta from 4:30-7:30 p.m. For more information, call (803) 279-7003.

DOWNTOWN LUNCH DATE each Wednesday through June 30 from noon-1:30 p.m. at the Augusta Common.

Will feature lunch from a local restaurant and musical entertainment. For more information, call 821-1754.

MEET ADOPTABLE GREYHOUNDS at PetsMart in Augusta, May 8, 11 a.m.-3 p.m. Visit www.greythoundlove.org or call (706) 796-1708.

ARTIFACT IDENTIFICATION DAY to be held May 8 at the Ezekiel Harris House. In case of rain, go to Augusta Museum of History. Call (706) 863-7964.

BE A TOURIST IN YOUR OWN HOMETOWN is an annual Augusta Metro Convention & Visitors Bureau event.

Participating area attractions are extending their hours, offering free admission periods and having other special events. Badges can be picked up for free at the Augusta Visitor Information Center inside the Augusta Museum of History Monday-Saturday from 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and on Sunday from 1-5 p.m. Badges make hometown tourists

HOPE HOUSE “VIVA LAS VEGAS” FUNDRAISER will take place May 7, 6:30-11 p.m. at the Radisson Riverfront Hotel. The evening will feature a Vegas-style casino including craps, blackjack, roulette and poker, with prizes available to purchase with winnings. All proceeds benefit Hope House, Inc. For more information, call 737-9879.

LETTER CARRIERS WILL COLLECT FOOD May 8 at your mailbox. Place your non-perishable food donation — canned soup, juice, pasta, vegetables, cereal and rice — at your box before your letter carrier arrives.

Learning USC-AIKEN CONTINUING EDUCATION offers Paralegal Certificate Course, Taming the Wild Child, Conversational French, Italian, Spanish for the Beginner, Sign Language, Debt-Free Living and more. “Travelearn” learning vacations for adults and Education to Go online courses also available. For info, phone (803) 641-3563.

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

31

Augusta-Richmond County Civic Center Complex Upcoming Events

May 6 - June 12

For information call 724-2400

May 6 May 7 May 7

Voted Best Steak In Augusta For 15 Years 1987-2002

May 20 May 22 May 23 May 29 June 12 * Arena • Bell

2856 Washington Rd. 73-STEAK 1654 Gordon Hwy. 796-1875

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MCG School of Medicine Hooding • MCG Graduation * MCG School of Nursing • Fosse (Broadway in Augusta) • Columbia County Graduation * Richmond County Baccalaureate * Somore & Friends (Comedy Show) • Southern Classic Feis (Irish) •

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gift Baskets for Mother’s Day $20 - $150 We Ship!

1036 Broad Street • (706) 724-6423 Open 10am-6pm Mon-Sat

THE ANNUAL SUMMER CONCERT SERIES AT HOPELAND GARDENS IN AIKEN CONTINUES MAY 10.

AIKEN TECH CONTINUING EDUCATION offers Education to Go classes online, as well as computer classes, massage therapy, medical coding and billing, motorcycle safety, driver education and more. For more information or to register, call (803) 593-9231, ext. 1230.

GED classes are offered by the Community Resource Center. Tuition is free. Call 722-4999 for more information.

SERVICE CORPS OF RETIRED EXECUTIVES (SCORE) provides counseling and mentoring to business people either starting or continuing their business. Counseling is free and administered by retired executives. For more information, call 793-9998.

FREE TUTORING at ASU’s Born to Read Literacy Center for all ages. Call 733-7043.

CANINE COLLEGE 101 at the Weeks Center in Aiken May 11-June1. Call (803) 642-7631.

Health ANGELS HAVE WHEELS: Medicare recipients suffering from conditions such as arthritis, cardiovascular disease and respiratory disorders who have difficulty walking or propelling a standard wheelchair may be eligible to receive an electric wheelchair. For information on eligibility, call Gregory at 1-800-810-2877.

32

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

CHRONIC PAIN SUPPORT GROUP meets the first Thursday of every month, 10:30-11:30 a.m. at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital. 823-5294.

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL offers a number of health programs, including fibromyalgia aquatics, water aerobics, wheelchair and equipment clinics, therapeutic massage, yoga, acupuncture, children’s medical services clinic, special needs safety seat loaner program, exercise class for breast cancer survivors and more. Call 823-5294 for information.

DIET COUNSELING CLASSES for diabetics and those with high cholesterol at CSRA Partners in Health, 1220 Augusta West Parkway. Free. Call 860-3001 for class schedule.

UNIVERSITY HEALTH CARE SYSTEM COMMUNITY EDUCATION holds workshops, seminars and classes on a variety of topics: Weight and nutrition, women’s

health, cancer, diabetes, seniors’ health and more.

Support groups and health screenings are also offered.

Call 736-0847 for details.

RAPE CRISIS AND SEXUAL ASSAULT SERVICES offers group counseling for victims of rape, date rape and childhood sexual abuse regardless of when the assault occurred and whether or not it was reported. Free. Call (706) 724-5200.

FOODBORNE ILLNESS CLASS held May 11 and 13 at MCG. Call 721-5437 for info.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER is seeking donors to prevent a blood supply shortage. To donate call 737-4551, 854-1880 or (803) 643-7996.

FREE BLOOD PRESSURE CHECKS and HIV testing at RHEMA Connections, Inc. at 1829 Wrightsboro Road, Monday and Thursday evenings 5-8 p.m. Call (706) 364-6135.

MELANOMA AND OTHER SKIN CANCERS presented by dermatologist Avis Yount, M.D., May 20 from 5:30-7:30 p.m. in University Hospital Dining Rooms 1-3. Call (706) 828-2522 or toll-free at (866) 869-2522.

THE CSRA PARTNERSHIP FOR COMMUNITY HEALTH will hold a Covering the Uninsured Awareness Walk on May 15 from 9-11 a.m. at Lake Olmstead. Features a walk around Lake Olmstead beginning at 9 a.m. and a short program at 10:15 a.m. on ways the government and the public can work together to move from awareness to action to developing solutions for this need. To reserve your place in the walk, call (706) 826-2292.

Kids AIKEN COUNTY PONY CLUB meets weekly. Open to children of all ages who participate or are interested in equestrian sports. For more information, contact Lisa Smith at (803) 649-3399.

GIRLS INCORPORATED OF THE CSRA AFTER-SCHOOL PROGRAM runs through May 21. Open to girls currently enrolled in kindergarten through high school. In addition to offering specialized programs, Girls Incorporated offers van pick-up at select schools, neighborhood drop-off, homework room and a hot evening meal. For information, call 733-2512.

JAPANESE E SEAFOOD AND STEAK HOUSE - SUSHI BAR

Mother’s Day Special Early Bird Special 12:00 - 6:00 pm $23.95 per couple Steak & Shrimp or Steak & Chicken or Chicken & Shrimp

All night long for Mothers only Filet Mignon, Shrimp & Chicken $17.95 per person

Washington Square Shopping Center

Next to Stein Mart & Masters 7 Cinemas

RESERVATIONS 737-4015

HAGGARD.

Unique Home Accessories

Now featuring authentic Italian ceramics Bridal Registry and Design Service Available

Louise Mulherin Classic Garden and

Antiques

Shopping Hours: Tues-Fri 11-6 Sat 11-5 National Hills Shopping Center 2701 Washington Road 706.738.8111

Gifts for Mom Free Gift Wrapping

MERLE

‘nuff said.

Martinez 855-1955

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

3830 Washington Rd West Town Market Square

33

WOMEN ON WHEELS, the Georgia-Lina Chapter, meets the second Tuesday of each month. Dinner is at 6:30 p.m., with the meeting beginning at 7:30. Women on Wheels is a women’s motorcycle club which meets for recreation, education, support, recognition and to promote a positive image of motorcycling. Location changes monthly. For info, call (706) 855-7375.

WEEKLY STORY SESSIONS at all branch libraries. Visit www.ecgrl.public.lib.ga.us for more information.

FIRST SATURDAY STORYTELLING at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum. In addition, there is a tour of the museum. Held 10 a.m.-noon the first Saturday of the month. Call 724-3576.

THE DANCES OF UNIVERSAL PEACE held the first Saturday of every month, 7-9 p.m., at the Unitarian Church of Augusta, honor the religious traditions of the world through song and movement. Call (803) 643-0460 for more information.

AZTEC DANCE OF MEXICO is part of the Morris Museum’s Children’s Performance Series. After learning about the dances, costumes and musical instruments of the Aztec culture, children participate in an Aztec friendship dance inspired by the powwow two-step dance from the North American Indians. Call (706) 724-7501.

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS: If you want to stop using any drugs, there is a way out. Help is available at no cost. Call the Narcotics Anonymous help line for information and meeting schedules at 855-2419.

Seniors

“ROOTS OF GARDENING” SERIES presented by Georgia Golf Hall of Fame’s Botanical Gardens. The ABC’s of Planting is from 6:30-7:30 p.m. May 20, June 17, July 15, Aug. 19, Sept. 16 and Oct. 21. For info, call (706) 724-4443.

UNIVERSITY SENIORS CLUB has moved to a new location at 4106 Columbia Rd. University Seniors Club offers health screenings, support groups, health education classes and social activities. For more information, call 868-3231 or 1-800-413-6652.

AUGUSTA BRAIN INJURY SUPPORT GROUP meets the second Thursday of every month, 6 p.m., at Walton West TLC. Brain injury survivors and their family members and caregivers are invited to attend. 737-9300.

HOME-BASED CARE available for low- to mid-income families seeking alternatives to nursing home placement. To participate, individuals must be aged 60 or up or must have disability status as defined by Social Security Administration guidelines. Applicants must also meet program income guidelines. For more information, contact the CSRA Area Agency on Aging at 210-2018 or 1-888-922-4464.

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL AMPUTEE CLINIC for new and experienced prosthetic users meets the third Thursday of each month, 1-3 p.m. 722-1244.

STORYTIME IN THE GARDENS will take place Tuesdays at 4 p.m. in May in Hopeland Gardens. For more information, call (803) 642-7631.

WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL offers Arthritis Aquatics and People with Arthritis Can Exercise. Call 823-5294 for information.

THE CANOE & KAYAK CLUB OF AUGUSTA meets the fourth Tuesday of each month at 7 p.m. at the Warren Road Community Center. For info, visit www.ckca.homestead.com or call (706) 860-5432.

SENIOR VOLUNTEERS NEEDED for the new visitor center at Phinizy Swamp Nature Center to greet visitors, hand out literature and sell merchandise. Volunteers are asked to commit one Saturday or Sunday per month, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. or 1-5 p.m. Call 828-2109 for information.

THE CSRA LINUX USERS GROUP meets 6 p.m. every fourth Tuesday at Border’s Books and Music in the Target shopping center. E-mail augustalinux@comcast.net or call (706) 790-8439.

AUGUSTA GEM AND MINERAL SOCIETY meets every third Friday at 7:30 p.m. in the Georgia Military College Building on Davis Rd. For more information, call 5470178.

AIKEN PARKS AND RECREATION offers a multitude of programs for senior adults, including bridge clubs, fitness classes, canasta clubs, line dancing, racquetball, arts and crafts, tennis and excursions. For more information, call (803) 642-7631.

JOHN BIRCH SOCIETY OF AUGUSTA civic advocacy meeting every third Saturday from 10 a.m.-12 noon at Friedman Branch Library. For more information, contact Tonio at 373-3772.

THE ACADEMY FOR LIFELONG LEARNING offers lectures, courses, field trips, discussion groups and community information seminars on a variety of topics to mature adults. For more information, contact the USCAiken Office of Continuing Education at (803) 641-3288.

THE SENIOR CITIZENS COUNCIL OF GREATER AUGUSTA AND THE CSRA offers a variety of classes, including ballroom dance, aerobics, quilting, tai chi, Spanish, line dancing, bowling, bridge, computers, drama club/readers theatre and pinochle. For dates and times, phone 826-4480.

MAY SIERRA CLUB MEETING features a program on recreational opportunities at the lake by U.S. Army Corps Ranger Jill Davis. Presented in conjunction with the Sierra Club meeting at the Unitarian Church on Walton Way Extension in Augusta May 18, 7:30 p.m. Refreshments will be served. Call 650-8314 or 737-1539.

“HERSCHEL” IS BY CHRISTINA RICE, WHO IS PARTICIPATING IN THE ONE-DAY ARTISTS’ MARKET AT AUGUSTA MALL MAY 8.

SENIORNET provides adults age 50 and over education for and access to computer technology. Many different courses are offered. Contact the USC-Aiken Continuing Education Office at (803) 641-3563.

and sell merchandise. Volunteers must commit to one Saturday or Sunday each month, from either 9 a.m.-1 p.m. or 1-5 p.m. 828-2109.

SENIOR VOLUNTEERS NEEDED for new docent training Program at the historic home of Nicholas Ware. Learn the fascinating history of Ware’s Folly and the families who lived there. All interested should call 722-5495.

SOUTHERNCARE HOSPICE SERVICE is currently seeking volunteers to perform a variety of tasks, including relieving caregivers, reading to patients and running errands. Training is included. For additional information, contact Lisa Simpson, (803) 463-9888 or 869-0205.

Sports FAMILY Y RECREATIONAL GYMNASTICS session held through May 14. Classes available for toddlers through teens. Call 738-6678.

THE AUGUSTA VOLLEYBALL ASSOCIATION is looking for new members. For more information, visit www.augustavolleyball.com.

THE AUGUSTA RUGBY CLUB is always looking for new members. Teams are available for women and men. No experience necessary. Practice is Tuesday and Thursday nights, 7-9 p.m. at Richmond Academy. For more information, call Don Zuehlke, 495-2043, or email augustarfc@yahoo.com. You may also visit www.augustarugby.org.

AUGUSTA FLYERS TRACK CLUB invites area youth ages 7-18 to join the team. Registration is through May 15.

For more information, contact George Taylor at 738-3737.

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

HYPERFLITE SKYHOUNDZ CANINE DISC EVENT coming to the Weeks Center in Aiken May 8 at 10 a.m. There is a 9:30 a.m. registration deadline. Call 642-7631.

Volunteer

FORTE INTERNATIONAL EXCHANGE ASSOCIATION is in need of local host families for high school international exchange students for the 2004-2005 school year. For more information, contact Tracy Klemens, (678) 358-5890.

34

PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK VISITOR CENTER is in need of volunteers to greet visitors, hand out literature

CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY NEW VOLUNTEER ORIENTATION PROGRAM the first and third Saturday of every month at the Pet Center, 425 Wood St. Orientation starts at 11 a.m. Volunteers under 18 years of age must have a parent or guardian present during orientation and while volunteering. Call 261-PETS for information.

THE KITTY ORTIZ DE LEON FOUNDATION needs volunteers to help promote organ donor awareness. For more information, contact Cassandra Reed or Espy De Leon at 394-0838 or kodfoundation@aol.com.

GOLDEN HARVEST FOOD BANK needs volunteers during the day, from 8:30 a.m.-4 p.m. Monday-Friday, to help sort donated products and assist in their agency shopping area. Help is needed year-round. If you are able to lift 25 pounds, can commit to at least 3-4 hours per month and would like to help fight hunger in the Augusta area, contact Laurie Roper at 736-1199, ext. 208.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL: New volunteer orientation is scheduled the first Saturday of each month at 1 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Schedule subject to change; call 790-6836 to verify dates and times.

RICHMOND COUNTY DEPARTMENT OF FAMILY AND CHILDREN SERVICES is seeking dependable foster parents to provide temporary housing, care and support for Georgia’s children. For more information, contact L. Lewis at 721-3718.

MENTORS AND VOLUNTEERS needed to provide support for MACH Academy at the May Park Community Center and the Fleming Tennis Center. Education, tutoring and technology sessions held Monday-Thursday, 3-6 p.m. at each location. Tennis instruction and fitness activities held Monday-Thursday, 6-7 p.m. at May Park

and Monday-Tuesday, 6-8 p.m., Friday, 6-8 p.m. and Saturday, 2-5 p.m. at the Fleming Center. 796-5046.

AUGUSTA/CSRA HABITAT FOR HUMANITY needs volunteers at ReStore, Walton Way and Tenth Street, to assist with receiving donations of new and used building and home improvement materials and warehousing them for sale to the public. The store is open ThursdaySaturday year-round. If you can commit eight or more hours per month, contact Steve Buck, 364-7637.

UNITED HOSPICE OF AUGUSTA is in need of volunteers to support terminally ill patients. Scheduling and training times are flexible. Call Donna Harrell at 650-1522 for information.

THE ARTISTS’ CONSERVATORY THEATRE OF THE CSRA is looking for volunteer board members, actors and production crew. Call 556-9134 or e-mail act@theatermail.net.

COURT APPOINTED SPECIAL ADVOCATE PROGRAM VOLUNTEER TRAINING: The CASA program is looking for volunteers 21 years of age and older to advocate for abused and neglected children in the juvenile court system. Volunteers need no experience and will be provided with specialized training. Call 737-4631.

Meetings THE METRO AUGUSTA FRISBEE DOG CLUB to begin meeting the last Sunday of the month. Call (706) 2108577. Dogs and owners welcome.

AUGUSTA SKI AND OUTING CLUB meets the first Tuesday of each month. Call (803) 279-6186.

AUGUSTA NEWCOMERS CLUB holds a coffee meeting the first Tuesday of every month. Call (706) 650-1400.

THE AUGUSTA CAVEMASTERS is the regional club for persons interested in cave exploration and conservation.

They meet the first Thursday of every month at the Warren Road Community Center on Warren Road. Call (803) 278-2751.

MEDITATION & BUDDHISM meetings through June at the UU Church of Augusta, Walton Way Extension, Tuesdays from 7-8:30 p.m. (No class 6/1.) Call (803) 256-0150 or visit www.MeditationInSouthCarolina.org.

Weekly OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS meets every Sunday night, 7:30 p.m., at Holy Trinity Lutheran Church in North Augusta. For more information, call 278-5156.

NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUP for relatives and friends of drug abusers. No dues or fees. The group meets Mondays at 7 p.m. Call for location. For information, contact Josie, 414-5576, or Lionel, 860-0302.

GAMBLERS ANONYMOUS meets Thursdays, 7:30 p.m., in the basement of Fairview Presbyterian Church. Call 1800-313-0170.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS: For more information and a meeting schedule, call 860-8331.

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS: If you want to stop using any drugs, there is a way out. Help is available at no cost. Call the Narcotics Anonymous help line for information and meeting schedules at 855-2419.

SEXAHOLICS ANONYMOUS, a 12-step program of recovery from addiction to obsessive/compulsive sexual thoughts and behaviors, meets Wednesdays at 8 p.m. at Christ Church Unity, 2301 Central Ave. Call 339-1204 and leave first name and phone number; a confidential reply is assured.

AUGUSTA TOASTMASTERS CLUB #326 meets each Thursday at 7:30 p.m. at Advent Lutheran Church in Martinez. Learn communication and leadership skills.

For more information, call 868-8431.

GUIDELINES: Public service announcements are listed in this section without charge at the discretion of the editor. Announcements must be received by Monday at noon and will be included as space permits. Send to Events, Metro Spirit, P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914 or fax (706) 733-6663. You may also e-mail listings to rhonda.jones@metrospirit.com or andy.stokes@metrospirit.com. Listings cannot be taken over the phone.

11th annual

Blues Festival Saturday, May 22, 2004

! MARCIA BALL " PINETOP PERKINS

BOB MARGOLIN JIMMY THACKERY WOODY MANN MARY FLOWER THE REDSTICK RAMBLERS

www.tixonline.com or call 706.597.1000.

Festival site: 2 miles north of I-20 exit 172 at Thomson. No coolers, pets, cooking or camping. Food and drink available.

Sponsored by the Activities Council of Thomson | P.O. Box 674 | Thomson, GA 30824 www.blindwillie.com Artwork by Keith Rasmussen

}

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

{

GATES OPEN 11 A.M. RAIN OR SHINE. MUSIC STARTS AT NOON. $15 advance | $20 at the gate

35

Bomb Epic

Hollywood

Flix Must-See

Boring

Comedy Sleeper Oscar Pick Director Stars This Rocks Famous Silly

Awesome

Action

Barbershop 2: Back in Business (PG-13) — Ice Cube runs the

roots-deep Calvin Jr.'s Barbershop on Chicago's South Side.

Again, more talk rises than hair falls, though the scissors team from the 2002 hit have a new worry, a slick rival across the way. The best laughs come from Cedric the Entertainer as Eddie, with a broad beam and a ‘do to match.

Eddie isn't quite so rife with the riffs that won the first movie a little notoriety, but gets into a fine lip-off with the big beautician from down the street (Queen Latifah, offering an appetizer of her upcoming "Beauty Shop"). As long as it is simply being a barbershop, the gab has a razor-cut charm. Running time: 1 hr., 40 mins. (Elliott) !!1/2 stars.

Bobby Jones: Stroke of Genius (PG) — Rowdy Herrington's movie

dinky, turning the dreams of girls into piffle. Lindsay Lohan pitches her pretty charm like mad as "drama queen" Lola, who leaves New York for New Jersey (looks like a section of Burbank), wins a worshipful friend, dazzles a boy, squelches a snarky rival and stars in a rock version of “Pygmalion” full of "American Idol" razzle. Wasted rather depressingly are Carol Kane, Glenne Headly and other talents, treated as confetti at Lohan's feet. Cast: Lindsay Lohan, Carol Kane, Glenne Headly. Running time: 1 hr., 34 mins. (Elliott) !

Dawn of the Dead (R) — Thanks to a plague, the United States is taken over by zombies. It pretty much follows the rules found in the “Zombie Codebook”: If killed by a zombie, one must return as one. Once turned into a zombie, one must seek fresh blood. One must also go to the mall. (To the mall?) The good guys, for some reason, think that the mall is a pretty neat place to be too. Needless to say, forces collide, with the good guys deciding to make a run for it to a (supposedly) safe island. But first, they have to get through a sea of the undead. Based upon the 1979 movie “Dawn of the Dead.” Cast: Sarah Polley, Ving Rhames, Mekhi Phifer, Michael Barry, Linday Booth, Ty Burrell, Jayne Eastwood, Michael Kellym, Jake Weber, Kevin Zegers, Tom Savini.

ew York Minu “N t e ”

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

further enshrines golfing legend Bobby Jones. An exalted amateur, he retired at 28 after winning 13 majors, including the only one-year "grand slam" (1930). He is played by two cute kids and then, grown, looks on the sad side of 30 in the gaunt visage of James Caviezel. There are some lovely courses, swell putts, drives where the camera flies with the ball, but the story is 18 holes of crisis:

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (PG) — Another Disney

Ella Enchanted (PG) — Is Anne

Hathaway the prettiest girl in movies? No, Hathaway (she's 21) is the prettiest woman in movies.

Her beauty and charming personality give some light weight to "Ella," in which Ella is really Cinderella. Ella is under a

n

Frankie Muniz, who is 18, playing 16 and at moments looks ripe to be 40, is agent Banks, a CIA operative on a covert mission to Britain. Kevin Allen directed like a giddy tourist, and the menu of Saturday daytime entertainment is served a bit more sharply than by the last "Spy Kids" romp. Cast: Frankie Muniz, Anthony Anderson, Hannah Spearritt, Cynthia Stevenson, Keith David. Running time: 1 hr., 24 mins. (Elliott) !!

runner-up crisis, temper crisis, pressure crisis, varicose veins crisis, marital crisis ... "Fore!" haunted by "Bore!," the film seldom gives much sense of the game's pleasures or even the acute seductiveness of its agonies. Cast: James Caviezel, Jeremy Northam, Malcolm McDowell, Claire Forlani, Aidan Quinn. 1 hr., 52 mins. (Elliott) !!

The Butterfly Effect (R) — As Evan Treborn, Ashton Kutcher is a floppy fishie with a hook in his mouth, and that hook is the script. Seems that Evan's dad is a deranged psycho with a "most unusual" brain disorder who, during the boy's visit to the ward, tries to throttle and kill him. As Evan grows up, there are other lurid milestones. Evan has a breakthrough: Reading his old diaries, the pages quiver and this lets him mentally travel back to a past he can now change. In the middle, gulping like a caught bass, is Kutcher, aching with sincerity and technique you could call inadequate except that no technique would be adequate. The poor guy is caught, stuffed and mounted. Cast: Ashton Kutcher, Amy Smart, Elden Henson, Kevin Schmidt, Eric Stoltz, William Lee Scott. Running time: 1 hr., 53 mins. (Elliott) !

20th Centruy Fox

Agent Cody Banks 2: Destination London (PG) —

Funny

Not Bad

ire” F on

Drama

36

Masterpiece

“M a

Lame

spell that makers her obey all orders — will someone please order Hathaway to stay pretty in better movies? Cast: Anne Hathaway, Hugh Dancy, Cary Elwes, Minie Driver, Vivica A. Fox, Eric Idle and Joanna Lumley. Running time: 1 hr., 34 mins.

(Elliott) !!

Envy (PG-13) — Tim and Nick are best friends, neighbors and co-workers. When one of Nick’s get-rich-quick schemes succeeds, Tim, who had initially dismissed Nick’s idea, has to cope with Nick’s overnight success and his own jealousy. Cast: Jack Black, Ben Stiller, Stephanie Adams, Rachel Weisz, Amy Poehler.

Eurotrip (R) — Scotty ditches his German pen pal when the pal, who Scotty assumed was a male, starts hitting on him. Little does Scotty know, Mieke is a woman, and when he realizes his mistake, the only way to win her back is to travel to Europe himself and apologize. Cast: Scott Mechlowicz, Michelle Trachtenberg, Jacob Pitts, Travis Wester, Jessica Bohrs.

Godsend (PG-13) — Paul Duncan (Greg Kinnear) and wife Jessie (Rebecca Romijn-Stamos) have a perfect son, who at 8 has a perfect birthday party. But Adam is then killed in an accident. Scarcely is the boy dead than Dr. Richard Wells (Robert De Niro) arrives, making a unique offer — he can clone Adam from one cell, at his richly endowed yet weirdly secretive Godsend Institute. But no sooner has Jessie given birth to new Adam than she babbles, "Something's wrong."

Somehow bad Zach, a sociopath, got spliced into Adam's DNA. "Godsend" is one of the collapsing duds that should cause not only critics to despair — not about bad movies, but that the makers believe any audience deserves this. Cast: Greg Kinnear, Robert De Niro, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos, Cameron Bright. Running time: 1 hr., 40 mins. (Elliott) !

The Haunted Mansion (PG) — Another movie based on a ride at Disneyland, again featuring cheesy, story-altering references to the rides, as

well as plots about ghosts and curses. Eddie Murphy is a workaholic real estate agent and a smooth-talking sleazebag. A promising real-estate deal turns out to be more than he bargains for, and his eagerness to scope out a house on the way to a family vacation leaves his entire family stranded at a creepy, cobweb-ridden Louisiana mansion with a curse. The result is a movie that, while consistently amusing, plays like a hackneyed effort to stretch a few minutes of ride into a coherent, hour-and-a-half story.

Cast: Eddie Murphy. Running time: 1 hr., 39 mins. (Fu) !!

Hellboy (PG-13) — It was made by Guillermo del Toro, fan of Mike Mignola's Dark Horse comic book "Hellboy." Ron Perlman gets a big ticket to franchise status as Hellboy. He's a devil child born from a Nazi attempt (with Rasputin) to open the entrails of hell, yet raised by kindly scientist Prof. Bruttenholm (John Hurt), longing for sexy depressive Liz (Selma Blair), amused by Jimmy Olsen-like FBI nerd Myers (Rupert Evans). Hellboy is huge, he's red. It's a movie for people (the guy kind) who can't stop turning the pages of comic books, who want life to be serialized.

Cast: Ron Perlman, Selma Blair, John Hurt, Jeffrey Tambor. Running time: 1 hr., 55 mins. (Elliott) !!

Home on the Range (PG) — Life at an idyllic dairy farm is disrupted first when a snooty cow comes to live there and secondly when the bank threatens foreclosure on the property. A group of animals vows to save the farm. Cast: Randy Quaid, Judi Dench, Roseanne Barr, Jennifer Tilly, Cuba Gooding.

Johnson Family Vacation (PG-13) — Comedy is long, laughter is short.

Scarcely directed, the movie is vacant of style and aggressively lame. You might pine for the old National Lampoon road comedies. Why do a black version of those formula pictures that is softer, cornier, more vanilla at the core? Coming so soon after the dismal (but more amusing) "Never Die Alone," this marks a bad season for black cinema. But "Johnson Family Vacation" has nothing to do with cinema, and nothing of value to

Warner Bros.

RATINGS !!!! — Excellent

!!!— Worthy

!! — Mixed

! — Poor

0— Not worthy

do with black. Cast: Cedric the Entertainer, Bow Wow, Vanessa Williams, Shannon Elizabeth, Solange Knowles.

Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliott) !

Kill Bill: Volume 2 (R) — Uma Thurman is on her way to revenge, martial arts fighting and mayhem in the last installment in Quentin Tarantino's "Kill Bill." Tarantino jams a lot into his blender of martial arts mania, pulp and cartoons. He takes the Bride's revenge mission against murderous former lover Bill through its narrative loops, kids the lofty stature of a martial master, stages wind-whipped car shots, and turns the Bride's lethal motive into female empowerment. "Vol. 2" has more story, more emotion, more breath-held quiet times to coax and trigger the tensions. For Uma Thurman, the Bride is It, the great vehicle for her giraffe sexiness and sly hipster humor. Thurman has her icon role, incarnating the Bride with slinky bravura, but also feminine feeling. Cast: Uma Thurman, David Carradine, Michael Madsen, Darryl Hannah, Michael Parks. Running time: 2 hrs., 16 mins. (Elliott) !!!!

The Last Samurai (R) — Tom Cruise stars as Nathan Algren, a heroic Civil War veteran and then embittered cavalry man, reduced to heavy drinking and shilling for a gun company. Algren goes to Japan, paid to train the new imperial army in modern ways and weapons. But he finds himself drawn to the insurgent cause and almost idyllic life in the hills of samurai leader Katsumoto (Watanabe), who fights for the old ways and hopes to win over the adolescent emperor from greedy modernists. Having come to teach, Algren stays to learn.

He is captured after impressing Katsumoto with his fighting spirit; the "barbarian" has a tiger within. "The Last Samurai" bides its time, has a predictable plot, but gives pleasure of a sustained kind. Cast: Tom Cruise, Ken Watanabe, Tony Goldwyn, Timothy Spall, Koyuki. Running time: 2 hrs., 24 mins. (Elliott) !!!

Laws of Attraction (PG-13) — Julianne Moore and Pierce Brosnan are battling but

loving divorce attorneys in New York. They meet cute, and treat the law as a form of repartee. They first get into bed together by getting drunk on Cuban booze, then rebound into scratchy bickering as if sex had barely registered. Of course, they are falling in love, and you can find the sporty delays, as the plot bobs and weaves, cleverly amusing or compulsively strained.

What dampens the breeziness is the slightly mothballed feeling that this has all been done, before and better. Cast: Julianne Moore, Pierce Brosnan, Parker Posey, Frances Fisher, Michael Sheen. Running time: 1 hr., 45 mins. (Elliott) !!1/2

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (PG-13) —

Olsen twins finally break big in this, their first nonstraight-to-video movie. Billed as a “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” for teenie-boppers, the plot centers around the plans of Roxy and Jane, two enterprising young girls, to escape their parents and spend a day around Manhattan. Predictably, the title of the movie is also about the same amount of time any self-respecting moviegoer would spend watching this shameless vehicle to promote the impending milestone of the Olsen twins’ 18th birthdays. Eugene Levy co-stars in a thinly veiled attempt to pay his rent this month. Cast: Ashley Olsen, Mary-Kate Olsen, Eugene Levy.

The Punisher (R) — Frank Castle is a former Delta Force member and FBI special agent whose family is killed by the family of a young man inadvertently killed in one of Castle’s undercover missions. Castle vows to get revenge. Cast: Thomas Jane, John Travolta, Laura Elena Harring, Samantha Mathis, Will Patton, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos, Rob Schneider.

Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed (PG) — Scooby and the gang

are back for another adventure. This time, they’re on the trail of an anonymous masked villain who’s wreaking havoc on Coolsville with a machine that spits out monsters. All signs point to Old Man Wickles... Cast: Freddie Prinze Jr., Sarah Michelle Gellar, Linda Cardellini, Peter Boyle, Alicia Silverstone, Seth Green, Matthew Lillard.

Secret Window (R) — Writer Mort Rainey (Johnny Depp), traumatized by divorce from Amy (Maria Bello), who's taken up with her plot device of a lover (Timothy Hutton), is ready to become jellied putty for a grim rustic who trails Southern Gothic literary vines. John Shooter (John Turturro) shows up claiming that Rainey plagiarized a story of his, ruined the ending and deserves cruel payment. How, really, do you go wrong with actors like Turturro, Depp, Bello, Hutton and (as a private eye) Charles S. Dutton? By using them as spits for King's brand of corn, roasted and then shoved down the gullets of the gullible. Cast: Johnny Depp, Maria Bello, John Turturro, Len Cariou, Timothy Hutton, Charles S. Dutton. (Elliott) !!

Taking Lives (R) — As Illeana, FBI detective and specialist in serial killers, Angelina Jolie is eager to help with a nasty case in Montreal. The Canadian cops are nearly helpless. It's up to the bold American nutchaser to corner the killer, a chopper and smasher so serial he murders men in advancing periods of age and steals their identities for a while. The story stupifies itself with a brutal fight, then a car chase and explosion; Ethan Hawke being sewn up with stitches, shown in close-up; hot sex (lots of Jolie). Director D.J. Caruso, whose "The Salton Sea" was a sometimes fascinating mess, is a clunk-along with plot thrills. Cast: Angelina Jolie, Ethan Hawke, Kiefer Sutherland, Olivier Martinez, Tcheky Karyo, Gena Rowlands. Running time: 1 hr., 40 mins. (Elliott) !

13 Going on 30 (PG-13) —

Shana Dowdeswell plays Jenna Rink, hitting 13, bright and shy, eager to run with the sarcastic fox pack at school. On Jenna's birthday, they inflict a wretched trick on her and the pudgy boy who yearns to date her. After a sprinkle of magic dust, she is suddenly about 30 in New York City, a rising novice editor at chick-chic Poise. And Jenna is now Jennifer Garner.

The cute and pudgy boy is now Mark Ruffalo, still cute, less pudgy, treating his talent like a warm puppy.

Weirdly, her new chum is her main rival at the magazine, the former queen of the fox pack now become Judy Greer. Enjoy the actors, lightly, but suspend all thought. Cast: Jennifer Garner, Mark Ruffalo, Kathy Baker, Judy Greer, Phil Reeves. Running time: 1 hr., 32 mins. (Elliott) !!

Van Helsing (PG-13) — Hugh Jackman is Gabriel Van Helsing, the world’s greatest and most successful monster hunter. He’s summoned to Transylvania by Anna Valerious (Beckinsale) to help her family battle a dream-team monster army. Upon his speedy arrival, he finds that Count Dracula has recruited every monster from history, leaving none for a possible sequel. Cast: Hugh Jackman, Kate Beckinsale, Richard Roxburgh, David Wenham, Will Kempe.

Walking Tall (PG-13) — is "dedicated to the memory of Sheriff Buford Pusser," the hero subject of 1973's "Walking Tall." Now there is Chris Vaughn, former Special Forces rock played by the Rock (Dwayne Douglas Johnson). The Washington state town to which veteran Chris returns has a new and gaudy casino not far from the sadly closed lumber mill. The casino king and town master is blond and blocky, played like a Northwest Nazi by Neal McDonough. His goons also sell drugs, and after Chris' nephew tries some bad stuff, Chris goes on a bashing rampage. Soon, he is elected sheriff. Chris fondly remembers "the smell of fresh cedar" at the mill, and it is a grand slab of cut cedar he uses to slam heads, backs, legs and guts. The real love is that of the audience for Chris' indignant rages, his glorious and glowering ability to inflict mayhem while also trashing property. Cast: The Rock, Johnny Knoxville, Neal McDonough. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliott)

You Got Served (PG-13) —

Elgin and David are best friends who are serious about their hobby: urban street dancing. When another town’s top group challenges them to a dancing competition, the boys must create new, cutting-edge moves to stay in the game. Cast: Marques Houston, Omari Grandberry, Jennifer Freeman, Jarrell Houston, Dreux Frederic.

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lasts 200 minutes, and some of those are long minutes.

The last 20 can feel like an hour, for clearly creator Peter Jackson didn't wish to let his saga go. Bernard Hill, Viggo Mortensen and Orlando Bloom are impressive fighters, and Cate Blanchett makes a gorgeous Galadriel. This is posing, not acting. Sir Ian McKellen acts very well as noble Gandalf, but lines about heart, courage and fate make him Lord Fortune Cookie. "Lord" is all epic, all the time. Jackson loves battles, which means hurling dense masses of mostly computerized fighters at one another. If the climax battle this time is more overpowering than the Helm's Deep boggler in "Two Towers," does it truly deepen the story? Maybe it is just more spectacle, as climaxes are stacked high and then the epic winds down with Elijah Woods as Frodo (now mildly matured) exiting sweetly, his destiny done. Cast: Ian McKellen, Elijah Wood, Cate Blanchett, Viggo Mortensen, Ian Holm, Orlando Bloom, Sean Astin.

Running time: 3 hrs., 20 mins. !!

Man on Fire (R) — Denzel Washington is Creasy, a veteran pro killer turned alcoholic and drifter.

His old black-ops pal (Christopher Walken) gets him a Mexico City job guarding the precious Lupita "Pita" Ramos (Dakota Fanning), bilingual child of an American mom (Radha Mitchell) and rich Mexican father (Marc Anthony). We know Pita will be kidnapped by vile creeps, that the cops will prove corrupt or hapless, and that after taking bullets in his upper torso, Creasy will soon be on his feet as a revenge demon once a ransom plan goes wrong. If Creasy threw a snivelling thug on top of an Aztec altar and cut his heart out, it wouldn't much surprise us. Nor does the "surprise" twist at the end. Cast: Denzel Washington, Dakota Fanning, Marc Anthony, Christopher Walken, Giancarlo Giannini, Mickey Rourke. Running time: 2 hrs., 10 mins. (Elliott) !1/2 Mean Girls (PG-13) — As Cady Heron, Lindsay Lohan is the new girl at a North Shore high school, fresh and remarkably adult after years in Africa with her parents. Cady discovers the school Balkanized among cliques, who hurl remarks rather than grenades. Cady, who seems haunted by the survival habits and water-hole imperatives of Old Africa, determines to join them. She’s pretty enough, even pliable enough to win the favor of Regina (Rachel McAdams), leader of the tiara twinks, aka “The Plastics,” and though there is a plan for Cady to subvert the group and undermine Regina, she blends in with almost lobotomized ease. This is one of the turn-on-adime plot comedies that has it both ways. “Mean Girls” has a wee plastic heart. And parts of it are quite funny.

Cast: Lindsay Lohan, Rachel McAdams, Tim Meadows, Tina Fey, Lizzy Caplan. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins.

(Elliott) !!1/2 My Baby’s Daddy (PG-13) — A trio of partying bachelors from the ‘hood must curb their wild ways when they discover all three of their girlfriends are pregnant at the same time. Cast: Eddie Griffin, Anthony

Anderson, Method Man, Bai Ling, Paula Jai Parker.

New York Minute (PG) — The

flix

“Mean Girls” Examines Realities of Adolescence

L

orne Michaels, 59, the godfather of “Saturday Night Live,” was pondering Tina Fey’s talent. She’s the legendary TV show’s head writer, co-anchor of its caustic “Weekend Update” and now author of her first screenplay for “Mean Girls,” on which Michaels was the producer.

“Smart,” said Michaels. “Smart.”

Tina Fey, 33, of demure demeanor and withering one-liners, was mulling the talents of Michaels, her boss. He’s the creator of a TV program one observer dubbed “a sociological institution.” He’s also a Broadway, TV and movie executive who has a keen, almost eerie, eye for comedic power, plucking folks named Belushi and Farley and Myers and Radner and Sandler and Ferrell from nowhere to star on his show.

“Smart,” said Fey. “Smart.”

“Mean Girls,” meanwhile, is a sharp, funny and warm take on high school based on the provocative book “Queen Bees & Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends & Other Realities of Adolescence.” The movie’s a long way from the woeful “The Girl Next Door” and the parental nightmare of “Thirteen.”

At a Grauman’s Chinese screening gorged with teenage girls, cell phones ablaze, there were huge laughs and knowing silences as they gazed at the depiction of their school lives — who’s

cool (female royalty are called “The Plastics”), rigid cafeteria social structure, and the not-to-bebroken rules of appearance (“you can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week”).

Fey captured it. Said Lindsay Lohan, 17, who stars in the film, “Tina was on base with everything — edgy and not cheesy, which is hard to do for a teen movie.”

The actresses who play “The Plastics” — Lacey Chabert, 21, Rachel McAdams, 17, and Amanda Seyfried, 18, agreed.

“There’s so much truth to it,” said McAdams. “Everyone’s been to high school, everyone can relate.”

Fey, who has a role in the movie as a quirky math teacher, said her challenge as a writer came in “adopting a nonfiction book that didn’t have a story.” She phoned the author, Rosalind Wiseman, co-founder of a Washington, D.C.based program for young people called Empower, “and asked her hand in marriage.”

Said Fey, “I was looking for a subject that felt good, topical and juicy. This had substance.”

Fey brought to it her own substance honed at Second City, that Chicago training ground for comedy minds, and seven years in the brutal writing trenches of “Saturday Night Live” (including three years as “Weekend Update” co-anchor).

Fey, a graduate of the University of Virginia,

By Lee Grant

attended high school in Upper Darby, Penn. (a suburb of Philadelphia), and was definitely not one of “The Plastics,” she said, but more of “a floater,” aligning herself with no particular clique. She does, however, identify with Lohan’s character in the movie: “being in love with a guy who’s in love with another girl.”

Wiseman had a number of studios after her book, which, she said, is basically about “who

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gets dumped on, who does the dumping, who does nothing.” When Fey showed interest, Wiseman realized “here’s someone who could turn it into a movie.”

“Seeing it now, I think Tina gets it,” said Wiseman. “I watch kids like a nature documentary (a thought Fey literally incorporated into the movie). She created a funny picture without trivializing the issues. I respect her intellect.”

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39

flix reel time

“Van Helsing,” Another Poorly Conceived Vampire Film

By Rachel Deahl

I

t’s a general rule that modern movies about Dracula need to strike a balance between a wide range of moods and themes: teeming sexuality, camp and horror. In his 1992 film, “Bram Stoker’s Dracula,” Francis Ford Coppola set that bar. Since then, few Dracula films (with the exception of postmodern takes on the filming of Dracula films, like “Shadow of the Vampire” and “Ed Wood”) have been as fun, ghoulish or, for that matter, romantic. The newest entry in the category, one of the first summer blockbusters, starring Hugh Jackman, adds to the long-running tradition of poorly conceived and executed Dracula films already crowding the canon.

Jackman stars as the famed monster slayer Van Helsing, who travels from city to city killing things that go bump in the night. Set in the late 19th century, the film first shows our hero at work in Paris where he’s wrangling with the unfortunate alter ego of Dr. Jekyl. Here Mr. Hyde, who looks and sounds like Shrek on steroids, meets an untimely death after being tossed off the roof of Notre Dame.

Doing work for a secret order within the Catholic church, and supposedly robbed of his memory – he has no recollection of his family or origins, Van Helsing is assigned to to go to Transylvania to hunt down Count Dracula. Once there, Van Helsing teams up with Anna Velorious (Kate Beckinsale), the last remaining member of a family that has been trying to kill Dracula for centuries.

Directed by Stephen Sommers, who’s responsible for both “The Mummy” and its sequel, “The Scorpion King,” “Van Helsing” has the feel of an extended special effect in which the dialogue and story were inserted as an afterthought.

Rolling tales about Frankenstien, werewolves and vampires into one insipid extermination fest, Sommers explores none of the compelling or remotely interesting themes touched upon by the Dracula story. A backstory about Dracula attempting to harness an energy source through Frankenstein in order to hatch millions of eggs bearing his bloodsucking offspring is only as silly as much of the idiotic chatter that utters from the characters’ mouths. At one point Jackman’s rogue makes a comment about heading for the sea and Beckinsale’s Transylvanian dominatrix responds with a wistfully unprompted, “I’ve never been to the sea. I’ll bet it’s beautiful.”

Even the character of Dracula provides little in the way of fiendish humor. As played by Australian actor Richard Roxburgh, the villain is an aging playboy who bemoans the fact that he has no heart while staying committed to his plan of obliterating the human race. Surely there’s a joke in that … if only Sommers could uncover it.

As handled by the director, “Van Helsing” is short on everything but slime and CG effects. A poor man’s “Men in Black,” the film is little more than an extended parade of ghoulish slayings, but with no punchline waiting after the kill.

Godsend (PG-13) Fri-Mon: 2:10, 4:30, 7:10,

REGAL AUGUSTA EXCHANGE 20

9:25; Tue-Thur: 4:30, 7:10, 9:25

Movies Good 5/7 – 5/13

New York Minute (PG) Fri-Sat: 11:45, 12:15, 2:00, 3:10, 4:15, 5:45, 8:15, 10:25, 12:35; Sun-Wed: 11:45, 12:15, 2:00, 3:10, 4:15, 5:45, 8:15, 10:25 Van Helsing (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:10, 12:40, 1:10, 1:40, 2:10, 3:20, 3:50, 4:20, 4:50, 5:20, 6:30, 7:00, 7:30, 8:00, 8:30, 9:40, 10:10, 10:40, 11:10, 11:45, 12:35; Sun-Wed: 12:10, 12:40, 1:10, 1:40, 2:10, 3:20, 3:50, 4:20, 4:50, 5:20, 6:30, 7:00, 7:30, 8:00, 8:30, 9:40, 10:10, 10:40 Bobby Jones: Stroke of Genius (PG) 1:45, 4:55, 7:40, 10:30 Envy (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 2:00, 4:30, 7:35, 10:05, 12:20; Sun-Wed: 2:00, 4:30, 7:35, 10:05; Godsend (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:50, 3:45, 7:45, 10:15, 12:40; Sun-Wed: 12:50, 3:45, 7:45, 10:15 Laws of Attraction (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:00, 2:15, 4:30, 7:10, 9:25, 11:40; Sun-Thur: 12:00, 2:15, 4:30, 7:10, 9:25 Mean Girls (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:05, 12:35, 2:30, 3:00, 4:50, 5:30, 7:15, 7:55, 9:50, 10:35, 12:10; Sun-Wed: 12:05, 12:35, 2:30, 3:00, 4:50, 5:30, 7:15, 7:55, 9:50, 10:35 13 Going On 30 (PG-13) 12:40, 3:15, 5:40, 8:05, 10:25 Man on Fire (R) 12:45, 4:15, 7:10, 7:40 10:15, 10:40 Kill Bill: Volume 2 (R) 7:20, 10:20 The Punisher (R) 1:55, 4:40, 7:50, 10:45 Ella Enchanted (PG) 11:55, 2:25, 4:35 Johnson Family Vacation (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:20, 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:55, 12:20; SunWed: 12:20, 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:55 Hellboy (PG-13) 7:20, 10:15 Home on the Range (PG) Fri-Sat: 12:00, 2:00, 4:05; Sun: 12:00; Mon-Wed: 12:00, 2:00, 4:05 Walking Tall (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 7:05, 9:15, 11:30; Sun-Wed: 7:05, 9:15 Scooby Doo 2 (PG) 12:35, 2:50, 5:05 Raising Helen (PG-13) Sun: 2:00 EVANS 14 CINEMAS

Man on Fire (R) Fri: 3:45, 6:50, 9:40; Sat-

Mon: 12:50, 3:45, 6:50, 9:40; Tue-Thur: 3:55, 6:50, 9:40 13 Going on 30 (PG-13) Fri: 3:00, 5:20, 7:40, 10:00; Sat-Mon: 12:40, 3:00, 5:20, 7:40, 10:00; Tue-Thur: 5:20, 7:40, 10:00 Kill Bill: Volume 2 (R) 6:45, 9:30 The Punisher (R) 7:25, 9:55 Ella Enchanted (PG) Fri: 3:20, 5:25; Sat-Mon: 1:20, 3:20, 5:25; Tue-Thur: 5:25 Johnson Family Vacation (PG-13) Fri-Mon: 2:20, 4:40, 7:35, 9:50; Tue-Thur: 4:40, 7:35, 9:50 Home on the Range (PG) Fri: 2:50, 5:00; SatMon: 12:45, 2:50, 5:00; Tue-Thur: 5:00 Scooby Doo 2 (PG) Fri: 3:05, 5:10, 7:20, 9:20; Sat-Mon: 1:00, 3:05, 5:10, 7:20, 9:20; Tue-Thur: 5:10, 7:20, 9:20 MASTERS 7 CINEMAS

Movies Good 5/7-5/13

Barbershop 2 (PG-13) Fri: 4:00, 7:15, 9:35;

Sat-Sun: 1:25, 4:00, 7:15, 9:35; Mon-Thur: 4:00, 7:15, 9:35 Taking Lives (R) Fri: 4:15, 7:00, 9:20; SatSun: 1:05, 4:15, 7:00, 9:20; Mon-Thur: 4:15, 7:00, 9:20 Secret Window (PG-13) Fri: 4:20, 7:20, 9:40; Sat-Sun: 1:20, 4:20, 7:20, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 4:20, 7:20, 9:40 Agent Cody Banks 2 (PG) Fri: 4:05, 7:05, 9:15; Sat-Sun: 1:15, 4:05, 7:05, 9:15; MonThur: 4:05, 7:05, 9:15 My Baby’s Daddy (PG-13) Fri: 5:00, 7:25, 9:25; Sat-Sun: 1:00, 3:00, 5:00, 7:25, 9:25; Mon-Thur: 5:00, 7:25, 9:25 Dawn of the Dead (R) Fri: 4:30, 7:30, 9:45; Sat-Sun: 1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 4:30, 7:30, 9:45 You Got Served (PG-13) Fri: 5:05, 7:10, 9:30; Sat-Sun: 1:05, 3:05, 5:05, 7:10, 9:30; MonThur: 5:05, 7:10, 9:30 REGAL 12 CINEMAS

Movies Good 5/7-5/13 Van Helsing (PG-13) Fri: 2:00, 4:00, 5:00, 7:00, 8:00, 10:00; Sat-Mon: 1:00, 2:00, 4:00, 5:00, 7:00, 8:00, 10:00; Tue-Thur: 4:00, 5:00, 7:00, 8:00, 10:00 New York Minute (PG) Fri: 3:10, 5:15, 7:30, 9:40; Sat-Mon: 1:05, 3:10, 5:15, 7:30, 9:40; Tue-Thur: 5:15, 7:30, 9:40 Laws of Attraction (PG-13) Fri: 3:35, 5:45, 7:55, 9:55; Sat-Mon: 1:25, 3:35, 5:45, 7:55, 9:55; Tues-Thur: 5:45, 7:55, 9:55 Bobby Jones: Stroke of Genius (PG) Fri: 3:55, 6:55, 9:45; Sat-Mon: 12:55, 3:55, 6:55, 9:45; Tues-Thur: 3:55, 6:55, 9:45 Envy (PG-13) Fri-Mon: 2:30, 4:50, 7:15, 9:35; Tue-Thur: 4:50, 7:15, 9:35 Mean Girls (PG-13) Fri: 3:25, 5:35, 7:45, 10:00; Sat-Mon: 1:15, 3:25, 5:35, 7:45, 10:00; Tues-Thur: 5:35, 7:45, 10:00

Movies Good 5/7-5/13 Taking Lives (R) 2:05, 4:20, 7:00, 9:15 Eurotrip (R) 2:35, 4:45, 7:10, 9:10 Secret Window (PG-13) 2:10, 4:25, 7:15, 9:20 Dawn of the Dead (R) 2:20, 4:30, 7:25, 9:30 Twisted (R) 2:30, 4:40, 7:35, 9:35 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (PG) 2:10, 4:10, 7:10, 9:05 Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (PG-13) 2:40, 7:40 You Got Served (PG-13) 2:25, 4:35, 7:30,

9:35

Butterfly Effect (R) 2:00, 4:15, 7:00, 9:15 Last Samurai (R) 1:55, 4:50, 7:45 Cheaper by the Dozen (PG) 2:15, 4:25, 7:20,

9:25

Haunted Mansion (PG) 2:00, 4:10, 7:05,

9:00

40

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

M O V I E L I S T I N G S A R E S U B J E C T C H A N G E W I T H O U T N O T I C E .

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Margolin Brings Chicago Blues to Thomson

By Lisa Jordan

A

s a member of Muddy Waters’ band during the 1970s, Bob Margolin received top-notch schooling in the blues. Margolin, a guitarist, credits Waters with giving him the opportunity to develop into a frontman in his own right.

“When Muddy said to me after I left his band, ‘You’re keeping the old school alive,’ it was the most important compliment he ever gave me,” Margolin says. “To be honest, Muddy was deeply disappointed that young AfricanAmericans seemed to be turning their backs on the blues, but in the 21 years since Muddy has passed, there have been some fine younger African-Americans who have embraced it, including Muddy’s son, Big Bill Morganfield.”

Passing the torch to a new generation of blues frontmen was one way of ensuring the preservation of the blues. Another way, evident today in the way Margolin approaches the blues scene, is co-operation. Margolin frequently tours with other blues musicians, plays at events like Thomson’s own Blind Willie McTell Blues Festival and has even produced an album, “The Bob Margolin All-Star Blues Jam,” which includes Pinetop Perkins, Carey Bell, Hubert Sumlin and Mookie Brill. It was nominated for two W.C. Handy Awards.

“When I joined Muddy Waters’ band in ’73, his drummer, Willie ‘Big Eyes’ Smith, told me, ‘Welcome to the club,’” says Margolin. “Blues players and blues lovers truly are an informal club because they do help each other out. Older players have been very good to me and I’ve tried

172, in Thomson.

Tickets: $15 in advance, $20 at the gate Info: www.blindwillie.com, www.tixonline.com or (706) 597-1000

Safe for the whole family.

May 12, 19, 26 - Downtown Lunch Date Augusta Common - Noon – 1:30 p.m.

Free

May 9, 16, 23, 30 - Candlelight Jazz Eighth Street Bulkhead - 8 p.m. – 9:30 p.m.

Join us each Sunday along the banks of the Savannah River for an enchanted evening of jazz.

Admission is $5.00.

FOR INFORMATION, CALL

821-1754

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

What: Blind Willie McTell Blues Festival When: May 22. Gates open at 11 a.m. and music starts at noon.

Where: Two miles north of I-20, exit

to pass that on to younger players.”

Margolin concentrates on the old-school Chicago blues, which combines Delta blues with electric instrumentation. Muddy Waters was one of the pioneers of the Chicago blues in the late 1940s and early 1950s.

“The combination of this modern technology and the old, deep Delta blues that Muddy brought with him from Mississippi to Chicago, is a sound that became very popular on its own and was one of the basic influences on the rock ‘n’ roll that came right after,” Margolin explains.

“Chicago blues has developed more modern styles in the years since, but it’s the old-school Chicago blues that we’ll be playing at the Blind Willie festival. People who already love it will be gratified, and those that haven’t heard it before will be taken and shaken.”

And if you head out to Thomson to see Margolin play, you’ll be seeing a musician who truly wants to connect with his audience.

“I express who I am honestly and want to know and be known by my audience from our experience together,” he says. “A responsive audience, like I had when I played the Blind Willie festival two years ago, brings that out even more, and the energy builds. It’s more of a personal interactive experience as opposed to, ‘I play, you watch.’”

Margolin is also looking forward to sharing the blues with us again this year.

“I had a particularly great time at the Blind Willie McTell festival when I played there two years ago,” he says. “A very soulful Georgia audience in a beautiful setting — can’t wait.”

41

music

Garden City Music Festival This Weekend

By Lisa Jordan

E

42

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

njoy live music by a variety of local and regional bands this Saturday, May 8. From noon until 11 p.m., 15 musical acts perform on two stages at the Augusta Common. You can experience it all for $10 if you snap up your tickets before Saturday, or $15 if you wait until the day of to buy tix. And, hey, if you’re 10 and under, you get in for free. (Enjoy it while it lasts, kids!) Get tickets at Fetch Dog Treats, Metro Coffeehouse, Serendipity Café, Pyramid Music, call 826-4702 or visit www.augustaarts.com.

Don’t forget the post-festival club crawl. Fourteen downtown venues open their doors to festival goers who still have their admission wristbands. Hop

from club to club and check out some more local talent: Participating venues include The Bee’s Knees, Blind Pig, Club Continuum, Cotton Patch, Crossroads, Joe’s Underground, Mellow Mushroom, Metro Coffeehouse, Orange Moon Café, Pizza Joint, Playground, Pourhouse, Soul Bar and Stillwater Tap Room.

As if that weren’t enough music, there’s also a pre-festival show on First Friday that is free and at the Augusta Common. That starts at 6 p.m.

For schedules and other detailed info, check out www.soulbar.com/productions/gardencity.htm.

music

CD Reviews

OUT OF THIS WORLD BIRTHDAY PARTIES

By Andy Stokes

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Theme Parties Available!

For More Info or to Book Your Party: Lynn Powell, Group Sales Manager 706-821-0614 • 800-325-5445 ext. 5554 One Seventh Street on Riverwalk

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10 oz. T-Bone Spymob – Sitting Around Keeping Score (Ruthless)

For reasons unknown, Rhode Island’s Les Savy Fav have remained all but unnoticed by most outside that city’s musical nobility, despite the three stellar and extremely vanguard albums they’ve released since their 1996 inception. They formed then, probably in one of the Northeast’s then-plentiful indie record shops, out of a shared love of Fugazi, Slint and other equally intellectual and razor-sharp post-hardcore giants. Since then, they’ve built their reputation as the preferred live draw of the high-energy, new-wave revival; their albums simply serve as not-so-subtle reminders of their vital offering to the post-rock aggregate.

If Goethe were around today, he would’ve loved the Gestalt approach Les Savy Fav took with their latest project.

“Inches,” a gathering of tracks eight years in the making, draws the A- and B-sides of nine seven-inch records they began releasing in 1996. The 18 total tracks are placed in reverse chronological order, so that the newest tracks come first on the album. This project is a pretty clever compilation: It leaves it up to the listener to decide which is greater — this album (the whole) or the individual records (the sum of its parts).

From start to finish, “Inches” unravels from Les Savy Fav’s most recent incantation of a more polished, Gang of Fourinfluenced art-rock to their gritty, garagepunk genesis. And since more than half of “Inches” was recorded and released in the last two years, the first half (the most recent) is more connected than the second.

Regardless of this whole-album lack of continuity, the earlier stuff (particularly “Rodeo” and “Our Coastal Hymn”) provides a clear portrait of the roots of New York City’s latest musical trend: Danceable art punk. And like most movements, the true innovators will go largely unrecognized, while bandwagon imitators are historically credited as the pilots of those revolutions.

So what if Spymob probably got to record this album as a result of their time spent over the last three years as N.E.R.D.’s backup band. After all, the only other album they’ve recorded, 1996’s “Townhouse Stereo,” saw little, if any, response from the consumer public. Now it appears Spymob is willing to take any inroad to recognition that’s offered, as fans of N.E.R.D. have surely become curious about these college-age surfer boys laying down the precise and inventive backing tracks to N.E.R.D.’s wildly popular tunes.

As it turns out, Spymob has their own very distinct blend of power-pop and blueeyed soul that hearkens back to Big Star, Steely Dan and even Hall and Oates, far from the hybrid funk lines they’ve become known for supplying for N.E.R.D. But despite the marked distinction in what they were paid to play and what they desire to play, listening to “Sitting Around Keeping Score” clearly maps out Spymob’s important contribution to N.E.R.D.’s music. It’s highly believable that the same band that was behind the rebellious N.E.R.D. anthem “Rock Star” could also have conceived the bouncy “It Gets Me Going.”

Out on their own, Spymob’s music dissolves any comparison to other TRL acts, instead falling comfortably among Fountains of Wayne, Matthew Sweet and Ben Folds Five. Though frontman/songwriter John Ostby’s lyrics are similar to jokes with buildups and punchlines, songs like “I Still Live at Home” and the album’s title track are carried by their complex layering of instruments and bright melodies.

The dilemma Spymob ultimately faces is that fans of N.E.R.D. who are drawn to them expecting the Chad Hugo/Pharrell Williams production touch will certainly be disappointed, and longtime Spymob devotees might be repulsed by their commercial success as a backup band. But this album is worth at least a trial listening period, as Spymob has been waiting eight years to make it.

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

Les Savy Fav – Inches (French Kiss)

2 for 1 Drinks from 7 - 9 Rhes Reeves and The Coyotes Band

Thirsty Thursdays $11 Pitchers of Long Island Ice Tea 2 for 1 Drinks from 7 - Midnight $5.25 32 oz.

Voo Doo Juice Buckets $3.75 Hurricanes $2.00 Domestic Beers

Two trips to New Orleans given away every Thursday until May 31st.

Bikini Wednesdays (Girls, You can take home your share of $700 cash!!) $9 All you can drink

44

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

(includes cover)

C O Y O T E S

Coyote’s own Mrs. September ‘03 Angela 2512 PEACH ORCHARD ROAD

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A

nother fine gathering of musicians is planned for the 2004 U.S. spring and summer concert calendar. The lineup for this year’s LOLLAPALOOZA FESTIVAL has been announced and, as usual, spotlights some very popular bands. Atlanta’s Turner Field will host PERRY FARRELL’s traveling rock and roll madhouse August 21 and 22. Already confirmed for the festival is MORRISSEY, SONIC YOUTH, STRING CHEESE INCIDENT, FLAMING LIPS, and GOMEZ. No JANE’S ADDICTION or PORNO FOR PYROS reunions are planned. As in past years, other local bands will be added to each bill. One thing’s for certain — this lineup is bound to perform more consistently on Turner Field than the Braves have in the first month of the season.

Blue-Eyed Soul Dept.

It's enough to make Sara do more than just smile. HALL AND OATES, MICHAEL MCDONALD and THE AVERAGE WHITE BAND will tour the U.S. this summer with two nearby dates for fans. You can catch the tour June 28 at Atlanta’s Chastain Park and June 29 at the Verizon Wireless shed in Charlotte. Local music wiz RICHARD WHITLOCK already has his tix so why wait? The three acts have over 30 hits among them making this one of the most attractive tours of the summer.

FLEETWOOD MAC is in the news again as the foursome’s May 15 Chastain Park gig is rapidly approaching. The band, who recently released expanded versions of “Fleetwood Mac,” “Rumours,” and “Tusk,” has a DVD taken from last year's show in Boston set for release June 15.

At Least It Wasn’t 52nd Street Dept.

Maybe he swerved his vehicle attempting to miss one of those feisty, feral New York armadillos that frequent many New York beaches. BILLY JOEL’s third major car accident in two years has to make one wonder what in the hell’s going on with the guy. Less than two

B Y

E D

years from spending time in a psychiatric and substance abuse center, his April 25 wreck involved crashing his vehicle into a house one block from the beach, eh, shore in Bayville, NY. Joel sez he was “just going out for a pizza” when he lost control of his Kia Sephia (just kidding about the car — maybe it was a Gremlin) and skidded through the yard before hitting the home. No alcohol or drugs were found, but one thing’s for sure: Joe Friday would have checked those pizza toppings.

New discs in the stores this week include RYAN ADAMS “Love is Hell,” THE BETA BAND “Heroes to Zeros,” PETER DISTEFANO (ex-Porno for Pyros) “Gratitude,” PATTI LABELLE “Timeless,” JAMES LAST “Spring Fling,” LOS LOBOS “The Ride,” MICHAEL MCDERMOTT “Ashes,” VERNON REID (exLiving Colour) “Known Unknown,” and original Commodore LIONEL RICHIE “Just For You.” New DVDs out this week include WEEN “Live in Chicago,” NO DOUBT “The Videos” STYX “20th Century Masters” WIDESPREAD PANIC “Don’t Tell the Band,” PIXIES “Pixies,” and NEIL YOUNG “Reactor.”

Turner’s Quick Notes 311 and THE ROOTS hit Atlanta’s H-iFi Buys Amphitheater July 31. CHRISTINA AGUILERA was forced to cancel her U.S. tour this year due to “strained vocal chords.” THE BEATLES’ “Yellow Submarine” will be made into a children’s book ready for release in September.

Rare 1949 recordings from a very young JOHN LEE HOOKER are out this week under the title “Jack O’ Diamonds.” Wake me up when it’s over. PINK FLOYD’s depressing last studio disc with ROGER “Mr. Happy Bubbles” WATERS on board, “The Final Cut,” is reissued this week. Take your meds, Mr. Barrett.

Turner's Rock ‘n’ Roll Jeopardy: A. This Curtis Mayfield composition was a 1985 hit for Jeff Beck and featured Rod Stewart on vocals.

Q. What is "People Get Ready”?

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Robert Coll ier at the Augusta Cana l Cruise and Cookout.

Marikay DeCrow, Shannon McReynolds and Mandy Linzay at Modjeska.

Ted Weatherred and Jane Faulkner at the Augusta Canal Cr uise and Cookout.

Molly Monro, Brenda Bibee, Jason Bibee, Emily Carder and Laurie Morrison at Derby Day.

. eul at D erby Day Becky and Ron B

Pizza Joint. tephen Faulk at S d an p te Es ny Gin

Liz Zettler, Brandon Brune and Katy New at Pizza Joint.

45

Photos by Michael E. Johnson

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

Harry and Carole Vaiden at Derby Day.

Canal the Augusta t a r a z A i and Bobby Travis, S ind ookout.

Cruise and C

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music minis Courtney Would LOVE To Stay Out of Jail Courtney Love may be able to get out of doing three months in jail for drug charges made in October when she was arrested in Los Angeles. A plea deal is brewing in which charges would be dropped if she completes a drug treatment program.

Judging from her inability to even show up on most court dates, however, some of us wonder if that’s not asking a bit too much of her.

Lawsuit in Musicland Rimshot Management, the L.A. company that produced the feature “Standing in the Shadows of Motown” about The Funk Brothers, is now suing the group. The group is, by the way, made up of Motown Records sidemen Joe Messina, Eddie Willis, Joe Hunter, Bob Babbit, Uriel Jones and Jack Ashford. The suit claims that, in Feb. 2004, the group fired Rimshot

as its manager, even though they had signed a two-year management contract the year before. The suit also claims that the management firm is owed tens of thousands of dollars in deferred commission.

Limp Bizkit Is Not, I Repeat NOT Breaking Up Whatever you may have heard, sources say that Limp Bizkit is in no imminent danger of going their separate ways. According to Fred Durst (according to Billboard.com), the group is in fact planning a tour for this year. They have also not been dropped by Interscope Records.

Durst has also started a ‘blog.

Billboard does not, however, say where to find it.

This Is Just Weird Elizabeth Jagger is now dating Sean Lennon. Just thought we’d let you know. Cue “Twilight Zone” theme.

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Information compiled from online and other music news sources.

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46

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

Work Hard, Play Lite!

Augusta’s Listen-at-Work Leader

AFTER DARK

Y 8.

HOSTS THE CUBISTS MA MELLOW MUSHROOM

HONESTLY COMES TO CROSSROADS MAY 7.

Thursday, 6th

Friday, 7th

The Bee’s Knees – Meditate on This!

Blind Pig – The Pat Blanchard Band Cafe Du Teau – James McIntyre Continuum – Playa*Listic Thursday Coyote’s – The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s – The Section Finish Line Cafe – DJ Greene Streets – Karaoke Locals – Preston and Weston Metro Coffeehouse – The Jazz Collective Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock Playground – Open Mic The Pourhouse – Karaoke with the Pourhouse Friends Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty Shannon’s – Karaoke with Peggy Wheeler Tavern – DJ Flashback Buddy

Andy’s – Pop and Tony Williams Augusta Common – Daze of Haze, Tony Howard, Josh Pierce Group, Hellblinki Sextet, Jemani Back Roads – DJ The Bee’s Knees – Projections and Selections Blind Pig – Col. Bruce Hampton and the Codetalkers Cafe Du Teau – James McIntyre Charlie O’s – Live Band Coconuts – Bikini Contest Coliseum – Charlie Brown Cotton Patch – Jayson Sabo, Michael Baideme Coyote’s – The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads – Honestly, Keep, The Josh Pierce Group D. Timm’s – The Section Eagle’s Nest – Karaoke with DJ MJ El Rodeo – DJ Sontiago

Finish Line Cafe – DJ Fishbowl Lounge – Livingroom Legends Greene Streets – Karaoke Hangnail Gallery – First Friday Music on Eighth Street with Pedestrian The Helm – Preston and Weston The Highlander – Arlington Last Call – DJ Richie Rich Little Honky Tonk – The Inhibitors Locals – Karaoke Marlboro Station – Dance Party Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock Modjeska – DJ Kenny Ray Ms. Carolyn’s – The Horizon Partridge Inn – Mellow-D Playground – Local Ghost The Pourhouse – The Recaps featuring Sassy Brass R. Gabriel’s – Riley Williams Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty The Shack – DJ Chip Shannon’s – Bart Bell

Stillwater Tap Room – The Gibson Brothers Wheeler Tavern – DJ Flashback Buddy The Wine Cellar – The Josh Queen Band

Saturday, 8th Andy’s – Special Blend Augusta Common – Garden City Music Fest Back Roads – DJ The Bee’s Knees – Moniker Blind Pig – Pat Blanchard Band, Scott Little Cafe Du Teau – James McIntyre Charlie O’s – Live Band Coconuts – DJ Tim Continuum – Knowface, Over October Cotton Patch – John Kolbeck Coyote’s – The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads – Turtleneck, The Sixth Hour, Jungle Bob’s Devil Tribe D. Timm’s – The Section

continued on page 48

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AFTER DARK brought to you in part by T.G.I. Friday’s

47

continued from page 47 Finish Line Cafe – DJ, Karaoke Fox’s Lair – Roger Davis, Ronnie Hill Greene Streets – Karaoke The Helm – Karaoke Contest Joe’s Underground – Tony Williams and the Blues Express Last Call – DJ Richie Rich Mellow Mushroom – The Cubists, The Kilpatrick Project Metro Coffeehouse – Live Afternoon Bluegrass with Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold, Josh Pierce Group, Billy S. Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock Modjeska – DJ Hydraulic Orange Moon Café – 360 Pizza Joint – Pedestrian, Chelsea Logue Playground – Jemani The Pourhouse – The Recaps featuring Sassy Brass, The Vellotones, Livingroom Legends R. Gabriel’s – Anna Grace Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty The Shack – DJ Buckwheat Shannon’s – Kool Katz Soul Bar – Shaun Piazza Band Stillwater Tap Room – Dark Corner Wheeler Tavern – DJ Flashback Buddy The Wine Cellar – Dispatch

Sunday, 9th Adams Lounge – DJ Cafe Du Teau – The Last Bohemian Quartet Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty The Shack – Karaoke with DJ Joe Steel, Sasha Somewhere in Augusta – Jayson and Michael T.G.I. Friday’s – John, Jamie and Pat

Monday, 10th Coliseum – Q.A.F. Continuum – Monday Madness Greene Streets – Karaoke Mellow Mushroom – Open Mic Michael’s – Mike Swift

Tuesday, 11th Adams Lounge – Keith “Fossill” Gregory The Bee’s Knees – 12*Tone Lounge Coliseum – Tournament Tuesday D. Timm’s – The Section Greene Streets – Karaoke Metro Coffeehouse – Irish Night with Sibin Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock

Wednesday, 12th The Bee’s Knees – Heliocentric Cinema Blind Pig – What You Want Coconuts – Karaoke Coliseum – Wacky Wednesdays Continuum – Open Mic Jam Sessions Coyote’s – The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads – Rock ‘n’ Roll Karaoke D. Timm’s – The Section Greene Streets – Karaoke Michael’s – Marilyn Adcock Modjeska – Theology on Tap: My Life as a Priest Playground – Karaoke Robbie’s Sports Bar – DJ Rusty Shannon’s – Bart Bell, Allen Black Somewhere in Augusta – John Kolbeck Soul Bar – Live Jazz

Upcoming DJ Baby Anne – Modjeska – May 14 Arcane Tribute to ‘80s Hair Metal – Crossroads – May 15 Mayfest – May Park – May 15 Drivin’ N Cryin’ – Imperial Theatre – May 21 The Crooked Jades – Stillwater Tap Room – May 21 Lady Chablis – Coliseum – May 21 Blind Willie McTell Blues Festival – Thomson – May 22 The Drive-By Truckers, Stewart and Winfield – Imperial Theatre – May 29 Big Sky – Crossroads – June 11

A Perfect Circle – The Arena at Gwinnett Center, Atlanta – May 15 Fleetwood Mac – Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta – May 15 Doc Watson – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – May 21 The Shins – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – June 13 Atlanta Fest – Six Flags Over Georgia, Atlanta – June 16-19 AthFest – Various Venues, Athens, Ga. – June 17-20 Vans Warped Tour ’04 – HiFi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta – July 28 Siouxsie Sioux – Variety Playhouse, Atlanta – Sept. 11

Elsewhere George Jones – Fox Theatre, Atlanta – May 6 Melissa Etheridge – Roxy Theatre, Atlanta – May 6-8 Ginuwine – Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta – May 7 Blink 182 – HiFi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta – May 7 Dirty Dozen Brass Band – Cotton Club, Atlanta – May 7 Brad Paisley – Wild Bill’s, Duluth, Ga. – May 7 David Bowie, Stereophonics – Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta – May 8 Keith Urban, Kenny Chesney – Bi-Lo Center, Greenville, S.C. – May 8 George Carlin – Fox Theatre, Atlanta – May 8 Nelly Furtado – Roxy Theatre, Atlanta – May 11 Blondie – Earthlink Live, Atlanta – May 13 Rick Springfield – Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta – May 14 Todd Rundgren – Roxy Theatre, Atlanta – May 14 Tracy Lawrence – Cowboys Atlanta, Kennesaw, Ga. – May 14

Many tickets are available through TicketMaster outlets by calling 828-7700, or online at www.ticketmaster.com.

Tickets may also be available through Tix Online by calling 278-4TIX, online at www.tixonline.com or at their outlet location in Southgate Plaza. After Dark listings are subject to change without notice.

Deadline for inclusion in After Dark calendar is Tuesday at 4 p.m. Contact Rhonda Jones or Andy Stokes by calling 738-1142, faxing 736-0443 or e-mailing to rhonda.jones@metrospirit.com or andy.stokes@metrospirit.com.

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News of the

Weir d

I

n April, choreographer Jenefer Davies Mansfield staged her “NASCAR Ballet” production at the Roanoke (Va.) Ballet Theatre, featuring 20 colorfully unitard-clad dancers, wearing corporate patches of the theater’s sponsors, prancing and leaping around a banked-racetrack stage (to new-age music and the sounds of revving engines), “racing” but occasionally crashing into each other, to be rescued by other dancers who were the “pit crews.” Mansfield was hoping for a big crossover audience of NASCAR fans gathered for a big race in nearby Martinsville. “In this business,” she said, “you’ve got to take chances.”

More Scenes of the Surreal In December, police in Lewiston, Maine, chased down a patient from St. Mary’s Regional Medical Center who, apparently fed up with his hospital regimen, had fled the building on foot, clad only in his gown in the icy rain, and dragging his wheeled IV pole behind him. And Gary C. Laine, 48, wanted on a fugitive murder warrant from California, turned himself in to police in Kerrville, Texas, in February and, apparently seeking to look cooperative, had already handcuffed himself before walking into the station.

Compelling Explanations • Thinking Outside the Box: It was a black male police officer who arrested her, and a black female officer who searched her, but drunkdriving suspect Donna Mills, who is a black New York City judge, still played the race card at her March trial. According to a New York Post report, Mills’ lawyer said that the presence of the black officers meant that Mills’ race-card defense was being undermined, and that that in itself might be evidence of police racism. (Mills was acquitted, but, in subsequent interviews, jurors said the racism argument was inconsequential.)

• Lame Excuses: In Los Angeles in February, Michael Marks, 25, raising an insanity defense to attempted murder, said he was drug-crazed at the time of the crime because someone on a balcony above him had spilled PCP on top of his head and that it must have affected his thinking. (He was convicted.) And Michael Cammarota, 57, asked a judge in New York City in February not to imprison him for engineering a multi-victim investment fraud but rather to send him to a mental institution because he needs help with what he called his “addiction” to money. (He got four to 12 years.)

• Missouri high school principal Robert D. Blizzard, 58, was arrested in Oklahoma in December and charged with indecent exposure after he was reported driving with his inside light on and his pants down, flashing motorists. When the arresting officer asked him how he could still keep control of the car like that, Blizzard modestly explained that it was no more difficult than “talking on a cell phone.” (And in April, a Toronto musician was ticketed on the very busy

Highway 400 after an officer spotted him behind the wheel of his VW Jetta practicing the violin.)

Not My Fault In Cleveland in March, John Struna won his lawsuit against a convenience store owner who had sold him Ohio Lottery tickets, claiming that the man ought to have explained a lottery rule to him (even though the rules are printed on every ticket). Struna had bought 52 tickets playing the same numbers in a game that pays $100,000 per winning ticket, but somehow he never noticed that the payout would be capped at $1 million, meaning that his 52 winning tickets would be worth only $19,230 each. Despite being a heavy lottery player (spending $125,000 a year), Struna said it was up to the store owner to explain that rule to him, and the jury agreed.

People With Issues Serial thief Colin Sadd, 41, pleaded guilty in April in Sheffield, England, to his latest capers, including swiping five cars that he had gotten dealers to let him test drive. As with his previous car thefts, Sadd drove them around, cleaned them up inside and washed and waxed them before abandoning them. Said his wife, “(H)e desperately needs help with his obsession.” And Debra Janan Goins was charged with theft in February in Mount Carmel, Tenn., after writing three checks taken from a purse she stole, but each time carefully filling in the check register with all the details of the illegal transactions.

Least Competent Criminals Cardinal Rules, Broken: (1) Don’t Carry Around the Holdup Note: Christopher Alexander Fields, 42, was charged in Hillsborough, N.C., in January after police found him acting suspicious in front of a Central Carolina Bank branch. The only real evidence of his intention was a note in his backpack reading, “I want $10,000 in $100 bills. Don’t push no buttons, or I’ll shot (sic) you.” (2) If You’re Paying With Counterfeit Money, Pay and Go: Anthony Lee Lamb, 20, and two alleged accomplices were arrested in Berea, Ky., in March after Lamb paid for a meal at a McDonald’s and then sat down to eat it, thus giving the manager a chance to examine Lamb’s $20 bill more carefully.

Thinning the Herd A 21-year-old junior at the University of California at Berkeley became the latest drinking-contest fatality, in a March game among friends repeatedly downing shots of tequila, vodka and whiskey. (“(He) was a competitive guy,” said his roommate.) And a 20year-old Carleton University (Ottawa, Ontario) student plunged to his death in February during a contest to see who could spit the farthest off an 11th-floor balcony. He had taken a running start.

— Chuck Shepherd © United Press Syndicate

Brezsny’s Free Will

really be a communication directly from an angel of mercy to you. To distinguish authentic breakthroughs from mere pareidolias, strike a balance between skepticism and open-mindedness. Just because some apparent miracles are frauds doesn’t mean they all are.

Astr ology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

I suggest you enlist the help of a Jewish Fairy Godmother. If you can’t find a good candidate in your own neighborhood, check out the feisty saint at www.yourjewishfairygodmother.com. Though I don’t know her and can’t vouch for her services, I like how she says she “combines a New Age soul with old world wisdom, East Coast savvy and West Coast mellow,” and “has black belts in schmoozing, manipulation and chutzpah.” That sounds just right for your current needs, Aries. At this juncture in your noble struggle, you need to be nagged and sweet-talked, prodded and praised. If you get too much tough love or too much tender sympathy, you’ll keep missing the point about your problem. But you’ll be perfectly motivated if you receive a blend of both.

There’s only one bad thing about mountain biking in the windy rain: I have to keep my eyelids half-closed and blink constantly to avoid being blinded. But as long as I’m wearing my waterproof parka, the ride is great fun. Today I swear I heard the wild irises sing with ecstatic gratitude as they soaked up the downpour. The moist blooming humus smell of the earth was intoxicating. The raindrops seemed jubilant as they gathered together into gushing streams and cascaded down the trails. Because no other humans were crazy enough to be out, I got to exult in some precious alone time with the woods. What’s the equivalent of mountain biking in the windy rain for you, Cancerian? What tiny annoyances are outweighed by gleeful benefits? You should pursue those experiences passionately this week.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

Welcome to the first horoscope in history that relies entirely on the colors of Crayola crayons for its metaphors. To what do you owe such an honor?

Simple, Taurus: After a dicey cruise through the midnight blue and burnt umber parts of the spectrum, you’re now awash with a kaleidoscope of flashier hues, ranging from pink flamingo to electric lime to neon carrot. Even wild blue yonder and mango tango are injecting themselves into the mix. Congrats on this vivid redirection. Where you’re headed is more interesting than the yellow brick road. In Crayolaspeak, it’s more like the banana mania brick road.

“God is a comedian playing to an audience that is too afraid to laugh,” mused eighteenth-century French philosopher Voltaire. What’s ironic, I would add, is that the moment you summon the courage to laugh, God’s jokes become tonic rather than cruel. They have a cleansing effect, and often tend to break down the obstacles to your dreams.

Are you ready to make the transition, Leo? The planetary omens suggest that you have ripened sufficiently to find the next divine punch line hysterically funny.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

According to Wordspy.com, the term pareidolia (pronounced “payr-eye-DOH-lee-uh”) refers to “the erroneous or fanciful perception of a pattern or meaning in something that is actually ambiguous or random.” Mainstream astronomers say this is the perfect word to describe what rogue researchers have called the “Face on Mars,” an evocative plateau in the Cydonia region of the red planet. It’s important to note, however, that not all wonders and marvels are the result of pareidolia.

For instance, the personal message you think you discern in a billboard or tortilla this week may

Turn your attention, please, to the predicament of Mohabbatsinh Gohil, a diamond trader in India. A cow swallowed 1,722 diamonds that he had accidentally dropped in the street. By combing through the beast’s dung for many days, Gohil was eventually able to recover many of his jewels. I suspect that in the coming weeks, Gemini, you’ll encounter a challenge comparable to his. Let’s hope you’ve got the patience, humility and sense of humor to sift through the mounds of drek in search of small but weighty treasure.

ACROSS

M O R E

A G O G

S I M O L L O S E A L P O N E O N D O R T B D E S O I T S O T H E B T I C O C T

S A E R E N F H O I E T I M N U I D P E S S T O S P U I C M D I E S T R

D E A N E M I T S R A G U

O N T O P B O L O

B E A R D

E M E R I P L N O M

E E L P E J A A K R O P C E O N E P R O C R E T

S T A T M A S T E R

T O R T E

Y O K E S

T O T E

P E E R

A G U A

S U E T

S E T S

61 Remembrance

Day mo.

62 Activity in which nothing is going on?

63 Drew (near) 64 Anger, with “off” 65 Hits the 5 and 10, say 66 Place for a pad DOWN Huddle For one Puckered Refuges Not leave home Many a gardener 7 Set forth 8 Garden tool 9 Add 10 Province 11 In case it’s called for 12 Hoover, e.g., informally 13 N.B.A.’s ___ Ming 21 Like a Möbius strip 22 Timed sporting events 26 Spanish newborn 27 Tatyana of “Fresh Prince of Bel Air” 30 Big Apple inits.

31 ___ Spumante 32 Its home is on the range 1 2 3 4 5 6

1

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SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

Don’t camp next to a forest fire or go on a picnic where mad bulls roam. OK, Sagittarius? Don’t play with matches next to a gasoline pump, either, or fly a kite in a lightning storm, or feed steroids to the monsters under your bed. In fact, I suggest that you take fewer risks than you normally might.

Whenever you feel a surge of daredevil energy, turn it inward and direct it at the mental blocks that have been messing with your creativity.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

It’s an astrologically favorable time to expand your

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Puzzle by David Liben-Nowell and Ryan O’Donnell

33 Stylish suit 34 D.C. V.I.P. 35 “Not ___ eye

…”

37 Desperate 38 Romantic Sammy Cahn/ Jule Styne song 39 Sheep’s cry

40 Easy mark 44 1981 thriller

about a stalker

45 Call again?

50 To have, in

Paris

52 Kiss

54 Trash sites

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55 Language of the

48 Binding

56 Radiation units

order

49 Odyssey or

Passport

British Isles

57 Fire ___

58 Forest female

For answers, call 1-900-289-CLUE (289-2583), $1.20 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5550.

Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. Online subscriptions: Today's puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/crosswords ($34.95 a year).

Share tips: nytimes.com/puzzleforum. Crosswords for young solvers: nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Is there anything more dangerous than getting up in the morning and having nothing to worry about, no problems to solve, no friction to heat you up?

That state can be a threat to your health, because if untreated it incites an unconscious yearning for any old dumb trouble that might generate some excitement. I’m concerned that you might fall into this trap in the coming week, Aquarius. To ensure that you don’t, go hunt down some useful and fascinating trouble as soon as possible.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

Late last year, the DJ Danger Mouse made a record that blended vocals from rap star Jay-Z’s “Black Album” with instrumental tracks lifted from the Beatles’ “White Album.” The result, which he called the “Grey Album,” was praised by Rolling Stone as “the ultimate remix record” and “an ingenious hip-hop record that sounds oddly ahead of its time.” Your assignment in the coming weeks, Pisces, is to join together seemingly unrelated elements to create a combination that’s as interesting and innovative as Danger Mouse’s.

There’s one way I hope your effort will be different from his, however. Because he didn’t have authorization to use the Beatles’ material, the “Grey Album” can never be commercially released. Your work, on the other hand, should be legal, kosher and karmically impeccable.

— © Rob Brezsny You can call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

New York Times Crossword Puzzle

33 Actress Milano

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE A D D L

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Imagine it’s 30 years from today. You’re looking back at the history of your relationship with desire.

You realize that the period of April through August of 2004 stands out as a watershed. That was when you clearly saw that some of your desires were mediocre, inferior and wasteful, while others were beautiful, sacred and invigorating. Beginning then, you made it one of your life goals to purge the former and cultivate the latter. Thereafter, you occasionally wandered down dead ends pursuing goals that weren’t worthy of you, but usually you wielded your passions with discrimination and integrity, dedicating them to serve the highest and most interesting good. Right?

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

of “Charmed” 36 Kitchen supervisor, peak in the sometimes Cascades 37 Like the 1995 11 Brown, for one film “Sense and 14 Big production Sensibility” 15 Lethargy 40 Quarterback Phil 16 J.F.K. overseer 41 Dressed like 17 Lean and tough Cinderella 18 Poke holes in 42 “The Magic 19 Army fig.

Flute” parts 20 One who went 43 Go on and on to school in 44 Sei halved Middletown, Conn.

47 ___ Station 23 Blue part of a 48 Jennifer Lopez map album “J to ___ 24 “Sure!”

LO!” 25 WB show 51 Whitish named for its 53 It’s based in star Tripoli 28 Unite 57 Ruckus 29 It’s stranded 59 Slight, in a way 32 First name in 60 Miles off Communism 1 “Come to ___” 5 Second-highest

Your role model in the coming weeks is Latin pop star Julio Iglesias, born on the Virgo-Libra cusp.

Though he has sold over 150 million records, he admits that there are thousands of people who are more polished vocalists. “I know I can’t really sing properly,” he told the German magazine Bunte. But he believes it is precisely his lack of perfect technique that makes him so appealing. “My voice has emotion, a style. The best singers can’t touch people like I can.” If I understand the astrological portents correctly, Libra, you’re most likely to succeed in the coming days if you use Iglesias’ approach in your own field of endeavor. Don’t let an obsession with flawless execution get in the way of expressing genuine feeling. Emphasize magic over cleverness.

repertoire of pleasurable activities. The hidden forces of fate will bring you luck and synchronicity when you set aside your familiar old amusements and experiment with fresh ones. For example, whatever your favorite sexual positions or techniques are, you should consider retiring them for a couple of weeks while you branch out. Same with desserts, intoxicants, games and getaways: Try anything different at least once. Drink some of that new chocolate beer. Get stroked by two massage therapists simultaneously. Schedule a singing lesson on a mountaintop or a flying lesson in your dreams.

51

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Amy Alkon

T

wo months ago, I met an awesome guy at a party. There was a mix-up when we exchanged phone numbers, so I only got his number last week. I called him, and last weekend we went on the best date of my life. The next day, he called to say he’d had a great time and asked me to call him later. I left a message on his voicemail. Now it’s the weekend; I’ve sent two text messages and had no response. I don’t want to scare him off, but I don’t want to blow my one chance to be with someone who could be my soul mate either. What should I do?

— Wait Issues

Are you looking for a boyfriend or a career in bad debt collection?

People fall in love — they don’t get there by being pushed. So, the guy didn’t return your call with 911style urgency. Considering that he wasn’t exactly in a panic to correct the initial phone number mix-up, is this any surprise? Apparently, you thought you would just spam your way into his heart. What’s next, a TV ad campaign suggesting he has no choice but to call? Like “Visa. It’s Everywhere You Want To Be,” maybe it’s “Lisa. She’s Everywhere And She Won’t Let You Be.” Of course, you could just cut to the chase: “It’s six o’clock, shouldn’t you be in love with me right now?” Already the guy’s wrong, and he hasn’t even had the chance to forget your birthday.

Just what every man wants — the opportunity to feel like a henpecked husband before the second date.

Nice try, by the way, to justify your nagging wife approach by speculating that the guy could be your “soul mate.” Yeah, and he could also be just a guy you went out with once. After one date, you really aren’t desperate for him so much as you’re desperate for the rest of your life to be “solved.”

That’s what the soul mate thing is all about.

Supposedly, there’s one perfect person for you, and once you find them, you’ll never have so much as a leaky faucet as long as you live. This theory is especially ridiculous because your soul mate is always assumed to be somebody two doors down who speaks your language; never some bushman in a loincloth jogging off to play toss-the-elephant-dung in the Kalahari. The truth is, there are plenty of people who kinda-sorta match with you; plenty more if you’re 21 and pretty much just hormones with legs: “My libido and your libido — no conflict there!”

According to three out of four YMCA dance instructors, it takes two to tango, and, no, you don’t get to

count yourself twice. When you meet a guy who looks like relationship material, try giving him at least a bit part in the action. The flirting part is your job. Bat your eyelashes and toss your hair in that way that says “Either I’m trying to give myself a cerebral hemorrhage or suggesting that I’m unlikely to point and laugh if you ask me out.” If he fails to do so, don’t assume it’s because he’s mentally ill or too stupid to understand how perfect it could be with you. Chances are, he’s uninterested in dating or uninterested in dating you. Avoid wasting your time trying to badger men into bliss and you’ll improve your chances of finding it. There are guys out there who will carry a torch for you — and not just because you shoved it into their hands and begged them to hold it while you tie your shoe. ______________________________________ My best friend and her boyfriend live in the apartment below mine. She’s pursuing another guy right under his nose, and it’s beginning to bug me. I don’t want to be stuck in a love triangle. How can I point her in the right direction?

— Reality Check It’s lonely up there on moral high ground. Just little old you, pacing and shouting to yourself, “Isn’t this disgusting?!” (Don’t you mean “How come this isn’t me?”) Although there appears to be no immediate danger of your getting stuck in a love triangle, living directly above somebody else’s must make any gaping, boyfriend-shaped holes in your life look much larger than they actually are. Assuming you don’t suffer shooting pains or exhibit stigmata when your friend’s mind wanders beyond boyfriend territory, you have no business pointing her anywhere but away from your ears with a simple “Thanks, but I’d rather not know.” Of course, in light of her ethical elasticity, perhaps it’s her you’d rather not know. Should your itch to play amateur Supreme Court justice persist, keep in mind that real justices wait politely to get appointed to the bench and assigned cases — tempted as they may be to knock on people’s doors and belt out verdicts at will.

— © 2004, Amy Alkon

Got a problem? Write: Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave., Box 280, Santa Monica, CA 90405 or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com.

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LIKES HAVING FUN BM, 26, likes parties, going out and having fun, movies, bowling, hanging out with friends and more. If I sound interesting, call me. !124754 ELIGIBLE BACHELOR Businessman and entrepreneur, 44, 6’, 170lbs, N/S, N/D, serious, tall, tan, trim, talented, educated. Seeking exceptional SF, 24-37, for exclusive relationship. !115278 KIND, GENTLEMAN DWM, 49, 5’10”, medium build, homeowner, financially secure, enjoys cooking, gardening, reading and music. smoker, likes asian and black females, 35-55, for companinoshioo and possible LTR. !607612 GIVE ME A CALL SWM, 43, 5’10”, 155lbs, enjoys cooking, movies, the outdoors, romance, laughter, good conversation, good company and more. Seeking outgoing, interesting, sincere SWF, 24-35, for friendship, maybe more. !989836 SEND ME AN ANGEL SWM, 39, 5’10”, 150lbs, mustache, goatee, shaved head, into hard rock, heavy metal.

Seeking compatible, cool SF, 32-55, friends first, possibly more. !984481 GIVE ME A TRY SBM, 25, 5’3”, with a muscular build, seeks a woman for a relationship based on friendship, trust and fun. !993092 SEEKING WOMAN WITH GOALS SM, 32, medium build, dark complexion, seeks average woman, 20-45, who enjoys movies, dining, walks in the park. !200166

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BY MY SIDE SWM, 51, 6’, self-employed, looking for friendship. I like movies, long drives, good times. You: SWF, 35-55, same interests, companionship first. !986387 EYES STILL BLUE 6’, 190lbs, brown/blue, handsome, chef, pianist, will send photo. Seeks pretty female companion, 26-39, no kids, light smoker/ drinker okay, for traveling, dating, possible LTR. !882215 NASCAR FAN SWM, 39, 5’11”, brown/hazel, average build, Libra, smoker, seeks an old-fashioned WF, 21-45, for LTR. !932866 SAY HELLO TO THIS...

34-year-old SBM who is 140lbs. ISO single woman, 25-41, who is not about games. If this is you, get in touch with me. I don’t want you to miss out. !205110 LOVE This Southern Carolina SBM is employed, 20, goal-oriented, dark-skinned, w/wavy hair. Looking for employed, honest SB/HF, 20-30, who might enjoy basketball, tv, reading, sleeping, listening to the radio, and more. !204179 VERY ROMANTIC PERSON BM, 35, would love to take you in my arms and hold you tight. Seeking a woman to share quality time, walks in the park, movies and quiet times together. !995604 HOW DO I SOUND TO YOU? Handsome, financially secure SWM, 54, enjoys the outdoors, long walks, swimming, dining out, biking and much more. Seeking intelligent, caring, trustworthy SW/AF, 3855, for friendship, maybe more. !960841

GIVE IT A SHOT! SBM, 25, 5’4’’, 180lbs, muscular build, likes bowling, shooting pool, vacationing. Seeking SF, 18-31, for friends first, LTR. !200325 ONE IN A MILLION Clean-cut, easygoing SB, 40. 5’7”, 170lbs, looking for a woman, 22-48, to spend my life with. I know how to treat a woman. I enjoy travel, movies, outdoors and more. !124879 BLACK TEDDY BEAR SBM, 27, is looking for a Queen, who treats the other person in her life right, and expects the same in return. !123000 HONESTY IS BEST POLICY Sincere man, 25, works as a cook, and is looking for a woman who believes in honesty and romance. !122303 FRIENDS OR...

SWM, 36, 165lbs, athletic type, likes watching movies, some evenings out, dining, dancing. Seeking SW/HF, 20-45, slim to average build, same mindset, for possible LTR. !943034 VELVET TEDDY BEAR SBM, 37, Sagittarius, N/S, in construction field, seeks an intelligent, attractive woman, 23-45, with healthy full figure, loving, caring, affectionate. !936899 ARE YOU OUT THERE? SWM, 56, 135lbs, athletic build, employed, likes movies, quiet conversations, gospel music, C&W, snuggling and good company.

Seeking SF, slim-average build, to share a lasting loving relationship. !979620 SEEKING SOMEONE SPECIAL SBM, 61, Virgo, smoker, likes reading, movies, dining out, travel. Seeking outgoing, caring woman, 18-55, with similar interests, for LTR. !850674

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M B D F H C LTR

Male Black Divorced Female Hispanic Christian Long-term Relationship

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Gay White Asian Single Jewish Professional Non-Drinker Non-smoker

53

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METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

MORE THAN JUST AIKEN, SC Do you enjoy travel, reading, church, and children? Call this non-smoking, 43-yearold SBCF if you’re a non-smoking SBCM, 40-55. !206590 A VERY SERIOUS WOMAN SBPF, 34, mother of 3, nurse, independent and secure, enjoys church, movies, dining. looking for commitment-minded, levelheaded, spiritual, spontaneous, respectful man, who truly appreciates a good woman.

Sound like you? !777612 SEARCHING FOR MR RIGHT SBPF, 39, Libra, loves church, traveling, movies, and dining out. Seeking SBPM, 3760, for possible LTR. !421273 VERY DOWN-TO-EARTH... and open. DWF, 5’11”, 135lbs, enjoys going to movies, outdoors activities, travel and meeting new people. Looking for honest, sincere, trustworthy man, 29-39, for solid friendship first. !996643 BE MY TEDDY BEAR SWF, 32, 5’3’’, 180lbs, auburn/blue, no kids, never married, enjoys movies, sports, travel, dining, bowling, cuddling, quiet evenings.

Seeking honest, romantic SBM, similar interests, for dating, possible LTR. !894568 MUST LIKE CHILDREN Single parent, 40s, likes reading, outdoor activities, most music, dining out, movies, and quiet times at home. !996641 COMPANIONSHIP DWF, 50, interested in gardening, antiques and traveling. Churchgoer. Seeking DWM, 48-58, for loving, tender relationship. !732056 LOOKING FOR YOU SWF, 37, 5’6”, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys mountains, bowling, the beach and music.

Seeking WM, 35-48, N/S, to be a companion, friend. !456544 BIG GIRLS NEED LOVE TOO SBF, 33, Sagittarius, seeking single man, 31-45, for romance, real friendship, possible LTR later. Give me a call. !111717 NASCAR/ETC MAMMA DWF, young 59, 5’4”, smoker, enjoys all racing, the outdoors, reading, beaches, mountains, motorcycles, fishing, sports and more. Seeking SWM, 54-65, with similar interests, for companionship. !989288 MAYBE YOU’RE THE ONE? DWF, 52, 5’4”, brown/green, 170lbs, retired, secure, homeowner, loves sailing, cooking, gardening, shooting pool. Seeking considerate, pleasant SM who likes the same, for companionship and possible LTR. !980275 THE BOMB SWF, 18, with a full figure, seeks a male, 1825, who enjoys movies, dinner, for friendship and possibly more with time. !955355 WHOLE LOTTA LOVE SBF, 33, would like to share movies, dinners, quiet evenings at home, the usual dating activities, with a great guy. !463610 OLD-FASHIONED LADY SWCF, 48, 5’3”, 150lbs, blonde/green, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys church, Bible studies, music, dining out. Seeking SWCM, 35-60, N/S, for friendship and more. !840939

SEEKING HONESTY SBF, 37, full-figured enjoys dining out, movies, reading, music, laughter, parks, and much more. Seeking similar SB/WF, 32-50, for friendship, maybe more. !964698 ENDANGERED SPECIES SBF, 57, average build, independent, likes the good things life has to offer, fun to be with. Seeking SBM, 55-68, independent, honest and caring. !927805 CLOSER TO FINE SBF, 58, retired school teacher, N/S, enjoys traveling and tv. Seeking BM, 50-65, educated (high school at least, please), who enjoys having good clean fun. !909981 ISO CHRISTIAN VALENTINE SWCF, 61, outgoing, Libra, N/S, seeks SWCM, 59-65, with whom to share Christ, friendship, and laughter. Must be family-oriented, kind, outgoing, emotionally/financially secure. Let’s give our friendship a try. !911830 TALL BROWN SUGAR SBF, 25, 5’9”, N/S, enjoys movies, concerts, quiet times, and good music. Seeking WM, 23-30, N/S, no children. !906840 WANNA DANCE? SWF, 57, seeks dance partner for Salsa and Square Dancing! Any size, shape, big or tall, short or small, matters not! It’s the footwork that counts! Beginner-intermediate level. !898986 I WANT TO LOVE YOU SBF, 18, 5’2”, Cancer, enjoys writing poetry, walks on the beach, hanging out and enjoying life. Seeking BM, 18-24, who will treat her right, and expects the same in return. !880193 WAITING FOR YOU SB mom, 24, Virgo, seeks a man for days at the park, the mall, or at the movies, and spending time with family and friends. !883496 HIKER HEAVEN SWF, 45, full-figured, N/S, enjoys church, exploring, old movies, auctions, and gym.

Seeking WM, 46-56, N/S. Let’s make tracks together. !807679 ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE Honest SWF, 28, 5’10”, 210lbs, blonde/blue, enjoys classic rock, horror movies, and quiet nights at home. Seeking SW/HM, 18-40, for friendship, possible LTR. !874789 LOVE OF LIFE Attractive, classy, vivacious SWCF, 50ish, N/S, N/D, seeks SWCM, N/S, N/D, who is honest, financially/mentally secure, and ready for commitment. !875741 SIMPLE KIND OF LIFE SWF, 34, listens to country and oldies music, and wants to meet a man to cuddle up on the couch and watch a good movie, or enjoy other simple pleasures. !860787 JAZZY MISS Slender and attractive SBPF, 31, loves music, conversation, travel. Seeking kind, friendly, honest and family-oriented SBM, 30-38, for fun times. !865339 DREAM GUY SBF, 29, searching for open-minded, outgoing SM, 22-38, military man A+, for friendship, fun nights out, dancing, talks and maybe more. !836990 SOMEONE TO LOVE SWF, 48, enjoys a good horror movie, a drama or a comedy. Seeking a man for romance, quiet times at home, or just dancing the night away! !832399

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To respond to ads using a WELL-ROUNDED MAN Educated SBPM, 41, 5’11”, loves reading, working out, the arts, dining out, travel, quiet times. Would like to meet SWF, 30-45, with similar interests, for fun, friendship, and maybe more. !442021

SEEKS MAN WITH DIRECTION GBM, 33, Capricorn, N/S, seeks understanding, level-headed, secure GBM, 2548, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !854633 FUN-FILLED DAYS AWAIT SBM, 24, enjoys taking trips, nice restaurants, fun evenings, dancing, quality time together. Seeking masculine SBM, 20-55, for possible relationship. !894435 FUN TO HANG AROUND WITH GWM, 52, 5’2”, smoker, enjoys playing pool, having fun, seeks outgoing GWM, 4055, smoker, with similar interests. !844895 TAKE A CHANCE GWM, 43, 6’2”, 195lbs, black brown, seeks other GWM, for fun times and maybe something more. !493530 CALL ON ME SWM, 43, 5’10”, 160lbs, blond/blue, loves the outdoors, dogs, fishing. Seeking SW/HM, 21-35, similar interests, friends first, maybe more. !113631 DOGGONE LOVEABLE SWM, 37, Gemini, smoker, nature and animal lover (especially puppies), seeks outgoing, down-to-earth man, 20-70, for friendship. !909184 RELAXING AT HOME SBM, 35, Virgo, N/S, likes relaxing at home, fun, concerts, trips going to the beach.

Seeks fun, spontaneous SBM, 26-37, N/S. !532700 SEND ME AN ANGEL SBM, 31, seeking serious, open-minded, down-to-earth guy, 30-45, likes hanging out at home, movies. Friendship comes first, possible LTR. No drama! !111070 TIME AFTER TIME SM, 38, is an easygoing guy looking for another guy to spend time with, and share a good friendship. !993392 IS IT YOU? Simple, easygoing SM, 47, enjoys bowling, music, cooking, more. Seeking outgoing lady for good times, talks, friendship and possible LTR. !975288 GLOVERVILLE GUY GWM, Capricorn, N/S, loves bars, karaoke, cooking out, and pool. Seeking GWM, 2849, smoker, to cuddle up with. !936256 LET’S SADDLE UP SWM, 27, 5’8”, brown/brown, Virgo, smoker, loves horses, camping (with or without the horses), and traveling. Seeking man, 25-40, who can ride, ride, ride. !921725 LOOKING FOR COOL CAT... to converse with. SBM, 34, Capricorn, N/S, game and drama-free, seeks BM, 26-48, serious-minded, with sense of direction in life. !889038 LET’S GET TOGETHER GWPM, 37, 5’9”, brown/brown, who enjoys reading, movies, politics, entertainment, seeks a guy for dating, possibly growing into more. !883365 I WANT TO MEET YOU! GBM, 32, 5’7”, average build, Pisces, N/S, likes reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports. Seeking outgoing, caring GWM, 2445, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !850885

54

METRO SPIRIT - MAY 6, 2004

How do you

GREAT PERSONALITY SBM, 18, 6’3”, 220lbs, masculine build, seeking SBM, 18-29, very masculine, energetic, fun-loving, to go out for dinners, walks and more. !627150 LET’S MEET FOR COFFEE Good-looking GWM, 36, 6’, 200lbs, muscular, tan, enjoys working out, yard work, spending time with my dogs. Looking for attractive SM, 32-48, for dating, maybe leading to LTR. !436231

1 YOU’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR BiWF, 27, enjoys everything, promises you won’t regret it. If you’re looking for a good time and friendship, I’ll be perfect for you. !830500 INTERESTED? SBF, 35, loves reading (Stephen King and Anne Rice), listening to alternative music, as well as jazz. Seeking a woman with similar tastes. !990549 READY TO HAVE FUN! SF, 25, seeks femme, 25-35, race not important, who is nice, pretty, slim. Let’s talk and get to know one another! !895256

GIVE ME A CALL This SBF in Aiken, South Carolina is 33, 5’8”, 150lbs, a smoker, and seeking a very attractive, feminine, fun-loving SBF for movies, walks, and clubbing occasionally.

Ages: 30 to 40. !204355 I HAVE GOOD QUALITIES Employed, nice SBF (lives in SC) is hardworking but will make time for the right SBF. She’s 34, 5’4”, brown-complected, medium-built, brown-eyed. Enjoy tv, cuddling, fishing, bowling, movies, travel, beaches. !207637 SINGLE MOM Beautiful, plus-sized SF, 29, likes dining out, going to movies, clubs occasionally, cuddling.

Looking for outgoing, fun SF, 25-38, for dating, possibly becoming serious. !997153 © 2004 TPI GROUP

ENJOY MY TIME SBM, 46, 5’8”, 190lbs, looking for SB/WF, 25-50, N/S, likes watching tv, going to the movies, cooking. Friendship and romantic times first, maybe more. !945941 LOOKING FOR MS. RIGHT SWM, 37, 5’9”, 180lbs, enjoys biking, sports, travel, dining out. Seeking outgoing, attractive SF, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. !557954 I GIVE GOOD LOVE SM, 28, 5’5”, N/S, Virgo, enjoys sports, bowling, movies, going out, quiet times.

Seeking a single lady, 26-34, same interests, for dating, possibly more. !957932 LOVES TO MAKE YOU LAUGH SBM, 37, 5’8”, slim build, Aquarius, smoker, disc jockey and pest control technician, seeks woman, 25-41, just as a friend. !939056 NEW TO AREA SBM, 41, 6’3”, 205lbs, brown eyes, handsome, Libra, N/S, ISO honest, sincere, fullfigured woman, 20-60, race unimportant. !928684 TAKE A CHANCE SM, 39, 6’, 240lbs, laid-back, artistic, loves life and trying new things. Seeking SF for fun times, friendship, casual dates and maybe more. !976288 LET ME LOVE YOU SWM, 37, 6’, 200lbs, Cancer, N/S, in construction work, loves camping. Looking to meet a nice WF, 40-60, with whom to share what lovers do. !908620 JUST LET ME KNOW SWM, 27, 5’10”, 165lbs, enjoys dining out, movies, music, conversation, traveling, romance, laughter and more. Seeking outgoing, intelligent, humorous SW/BF, 18-30, for companionship. !956434 PRINCE SBM, 27, 5’11”, 165lbs, enjoys music, travel, reading, dining. Seeking a woman who is outgoing, attractive, with similar interests for possible LTR. !954917 NO MORE GAMES SWM, 34, 6’4”, 190lbs, is in great shape, and is looking for a woman who keeps herself healthy and believes in honesty. !955377 ME AND MISS LADY SBM, 38, 6’1”, professional cook, likes sports, looking for a lady, 28-42, likes quiet times, walks in the park, family, fun. Does this sound like you? !951742 WHAT A CATCH Slim SBM, 22, 5’10”, green eyes, looking for a laid-back, cool girl, 18-29, very attractive, open mind. Let’s talk. !952108 MUCH TO OFFER SHM, 58, 5’10”, 185lbs, salt-n-pepper hair, retired, Virgo, N/S, loves trailer camping, mountains, beaches. Seeking WF, 48-62, N/S, retired a+. !937107 LOVEABLE TEDDY BEAR SBM, 38, 6’2”, Cancer, smoker, loves sports, dinner, dancing, movies. Seeking woman, 20-45, smoker, to kick up her heels with me. !938554 A LITTLE TLC DWM, 49, 5’11”, 195lbs, homeowner, financially secure, enjoys cooking, home life, motorcycle riding. Looking for attractive WF, 35-50, with similar interests. !938440 PLEASE, PLEASE ME SWM, 32, N/S, N/D, is looking for a woman, 27-35, with a petite build, to share good times, conversations and maybe more. !871092 EASY TO TALK TO SWM, 48, loves good Italian or French cuisine, and is looking for a man who is easy to get along with, for romance. !870126

GOOD COMPANY SBF, 27, wants to meet a friend for hanging out, shopping, having fun and enjoying good company. !990953 JUST THE FACTS SBPF, 41, Libra, N/S, seeks PF, age and race unimportant, who enjoys dining out, quiet times at home, and movies, for LTR. !730225 WHY NOT CALL? SBF, 41, seeks goal-oriented, caring SBF with children ok, for friendship, dating and possible relationship. !976521 SOMETHING SPECIAL DWF, 45, 5’8”, 145lbs, two kids at home, loves heavy metal music. Seeking SWF, 30-50, likes being around kids, for possible LTR. !945525

AFRICAN-AMERICAN STUD Open-minded, spontaneous, laid-back SBF, 23, Pisces, N/S, loves R&B and oldschool music. Seeking feminine woman, 25-50, race not important, who loves to have fun. !919677 WAITING FOR YOU SBF, 19, is in search of a friend first, maybe more with time, with a lady who likes to get out and have fun. !874312 ONLY A WOMAN WILL KNOW GBF, Capricorn, N/S, likes reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports. Seeking outgoing, caring GWF, 27-52, N/S, with similar interests, for dating and more. !850614 BONEVILLE BABE SWF, 31, 5’5”, 130lbs, brown/green, smoker, enjoys playing golf, movies, and picnics at the lake. Seeking WF, 25-40, for friends, possibly more. !818908 GET TO KNOW ME SBF, 25, Taurus, N/S, enjoys movies, travel.

Seeking woman, 21-30, N/S, for friendship, possible romance. !803723 A LOT TO OFFER Non-smoking GBF, 37, N/S, seeks very attractive, unique, romantic, fun, intelligent, feminine GF, 27-37, for friendship, dating, possibly more. !749660 WHY WAIT? SWF, 38, 5’6”,140lbs, short brown hair, easygoing, enjoys playing golf, the beach.

Seeking feminine female, 20-40, to have fun times and more. !448489

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